TRASHFUTURE - Locals Only ft. Marcus Barnett

Episode Date: May 14, 2018

It's this week's TF for ya! Marcus Barnett (@reformedmuscle) came by to talk to Riley (@raaleh), Hussein (@hkesvani) and Milo (@milo_edwards) about local elections, the psycho sexual mania of failure obsessed liberal pundits, and the future of the Labour party sans melts. While Marcus visits us in an entirely personal capacity, in his spare time he is Young Labour's International Officer. Ably produced by Nate (@inthesedeserts). Vote for us in this dumb thing: https://www.britishpodcastawards.com/vote/ Commodify ur dissent w a shirt from http://www.lilcomrade.com/. Get a fun custom text and we'll shout em out on the show. In fact Riley's a whore for attention he'll probably just shout you out regardless. xoxo

You had some thoughts about the White House Correspondence Dinner, which by the time this comes out, might be old news. I think it's already old news, but I was just getting very annoyed by all of the discussion of it. It was just like, well, because you had all the chuts who were getting really, like, but hurt about, you know, being offensive about someone they like, as opposed to being offensive about someone they don't like, which is basically the take everyone had. It's like, oh, you know, they can dish it out, but they can't take it, which is like

fine, but it's very obvious. When what I was most surprised about was how, how fucking tame it was. Like when she said, like she burns fats and then she uses the ashes to get that perfect eye shadow finish. That was like the most like lame, like un, unbobbed, like, I like God, if I'd have been at that White House Correspondence Dinner, people would have lost their fucking minds. Because that's because they would have found out you were from Russia. You have Eric Garland, like burst into the White House Correspondence Dinner.

Subscribe to my premium feed. I'll tell you why this guy is a fucking plant with his base, with his base guitar. Eric Garland saving the world one Seinfeld riff at a time. It's like, you know, it is. Is Garland or like one porn soundtrack at a time? Garland, like, like Garland is Garland's imagines that like Trump is in his, you know, modest New York flat with his bike up against the wall and stuff. And he's and he's, you know, maybe I don't know.

He's just doing Jerry, because Jerry Seinfeld's always in the kitchen doing something with food whenever someone bursts in and then Kramer, who's Putin burst in and is like, I'm going to give you the election, Jerry. And then Eric Garland in protest plays. And that's and that's game theory. I like that we're now describing Seinfeld. Welcome again. I say again, because we in real life just recorded one of these and now we're

recording a second one. This one may come out first. That's the magic of the audio medium. Disorganization. It turns out the real treasure was disorganization. Socialist disorganizing. Actually, in Russian it's a disorganized Metsia. I bet the real Russian speaker is not.

Disorganized. I can say that disorganized Metsia sounds like a sort of Turkish dish you could order. Oh, racialists. I mean, we're going to get to that later. When we talk about the only Ackparty MP in the UK, but we should talk about like Russian comedy, I guess, first, because I mean, I'm new. Hey, new to the show, you know, very new to the show. And I just found out that you've, you know, you've you've do stuff in Russia

doing comedy like what's show you introduce. So we introduce the show and introduce ourselves and find out about Russian comedy. Let's do that. Yeah. Okay. Welcome back to the second episode. We recorded this evening of Trash Future, the podcast by The Future is Trash. My name is Riley. You can find me on Twitter at Riley. It's Hussain.

I'm still looking for the last stone to unlock the Evangelion DVD. You realize this one may come out first. Oh, okay. So just suggest as a backstory and you'll hear about this more and like the other episode that we recorded before this one. No, reference the future like a true donor. The fucking Nostradamus of this podcast. I wonder what you mean.

All I'm going to say is there's an Evangelion DVD and there's some secret stuff on there that I need to unlock it. And my ball comrade. And I'm Marcus Barna. I'm a young Labour's international officer and I'm the secretary of London Young Labour. You can find me on Twitter at reformedmuscle. That's reformedmuscle.

People feel really seem to be fucked up by that. You know, it's like bodybuilding.com. But it was just a joke to me. My friend had ages ago about the idea of like nightclub security guards gone good. Bouncer's done good reformedmuscle, you know, outsourced squad. Yeah, exactly. They're kind of like former bullies turned into good guys. Like those guys who get really ripped in prison and then come out and open a gym.

Yeah. So it sounds like bodybuilders who've decided just to go woke after like watching reformedmuscle after watching like call me by your name. I'm not so sure. Like I wrote this article the day in Jacobin and like the editor of Jacobin Baskar was like he published that on his Twitter and he just said like he was just basically talking about my fucking Twitter handle. And I was like, oh, God, maybe I should just change it.

You know, it seems to be taken up a lot of, you know, space in people's minds, you know? And I'm change it to hired. I have goons. I have goons. And our preferred kind of goon. And in Russia. Yeah. Hi, it's me, Milo Edwards. This podcast, International Officer.

You can find me on Twitter at Milo on Discord where I tweet bad jokes and stuff about Moscow. They get the pronunciation, right? Head of head of all all the Turkish cuisine. I didn't actually hear it because Google hang out. So maybe the best you didn't. Anyway, yeah. Russian intelligence interfering once again. The Russians like those types of jokes.

I mean, I don't think, you know, Western liberals like them, but that might mean the Russians like them. Maybe, yeah. Oh, actually, on the subject, I've got a quick, I've got a quick thing about Russia before we move on, which is that, so, you know, they've been trying to ban telegram with like zero success, despite having spent literal like 50 million dollars on this. That the same the same body, Roscomne Nador, is now threatening also to ban Fiber for the same thing, i.e. not sharing encryption keys for users with the FSB. And and they're like, yes, if they do not comply,

Viber will suffer the same fate as telegram. And it's like, what, still working completely? It's like so funny. If you're going to start, if you're if you're like a startup entrepreneur and you want your communications company to do very well and work fine, the best thing to do is get banned in Russia, apparently. One of the things that I find very funny sometimes is just thinking about like the guys who are eavesdropping on Milo's calls, because

the reason why is because I imagine there's two guys who work in like VFSB or whatever. And one of them is listening to this tape and all our stupid jokes. And the other one is just listening to Milo just say random things into a microphone with like zero context. At some point earlier today, like some poor kid at the FSB was listening to like What is a big fancy boy shirt? Was listening to like why Virgil was a hack? Roman poet Virgil.

No, not anyone modern. No, not Thunderbird Puppet. But you, Marcus, you had a question about Russian humor, as I recall. Well, yes, I was just asking into the mic. Yeah, so like, I've got real trouble with this mic, haven't I? Yes, I mean, what's the deal with that Russian humor then? I guess that's kind of holding out for what I just asked then about, you know, the Russians enjoy all of the kind of, you know, Russia did it

style stuff that Western liberals really don't enjoy. What's your thoughts on that? Well, yeah, Russian humor. I don't really get to do any political stuff because I work for TV and you can't get that on TV. You can do you can do political stuff live with like varying degrees of success, depending on like, I've got a mate here who's like an alternative comedian who literally he works for like one stand up club, which has like a YouTube channel. And so they just put his solo shows up on YouTube and he he does political stuff.

But I like have seen him absolutely die at shows just because of the FSB and the crowd is not like but he'll be doing like even not very he won't be doing like he's not even doing like controversial political stuff, like he'll do a bit of stuff about Putin, but it'll also do stuff about Navalny. And then he just did like 10 minutes about like how there are all these people in Russia who hate feminists and how that's really dumb. And people were like, but basically saying women should have rights. So, you know, that was good.

The main problem I find with Russian crowds is just that they haven't seen much stand up usually. So, if you try and do anything that isn't like obvious Jimmy Carr style stuff, they're just like, what's that thing that it's like Jimmy Carr style stuff? If you asked most people to name an English comedian, they would probably say Jim. So that's the Russian comedy update portion of the show. Now shall we get to the hell? Yeah, should we get to have its own jingle, Nate? Uh, shall we get to the politics?

It's the Soviet National Anthem. Okay. Some shit just happened in England. It was, it was, it was something. There was a series of elections, local style. Yeah, we did well. I think we did. Now, here's the thing.

Again, because half of our listeners are American. Just from some brief background, in Britain, like local elections don't take place like they do in America. A lot of them tend to happen at once and you will be electing counselors who will work, who will like represent your ward, your ward. And then from there, then you'll govern a local authority and you're electing people to that local authorities council. And, and unlike in America where it seems just like a guy with a boat dealership can become mayor of a small town in Florida. Here, you're still a member of the party you're standing for.

And so you can vote Labour for your council. You can vote Tory for your council if you're a monster. Or if you have a reverse mortgage, you can vote for anyone else. Anyway, that's the basics of what just happened. And a lot of local council elections just took place here in England. They certainly did. They certainly did. They really did. I'm really exhausted.

I set up till about six o'clock. And Marcus, what happened? So we won 2,310 seats to the Tories, 1,330, which means that the Tories lost 31. We gained 59. A few marginal parties like the Greens and the Liberal Democrats did quite well too. Different kinds of Tory. Yeah, all different kinds of Tory, different shades of Tory, you know. Lib Dems are like Golden Rod City Tories.

Yeah. And there's like, yeah. Well, Lib Dems are kind of like woke anti-Brexit Tories now, aren't they? They all just want to be Anna Subri. Yeah, pretty much. They want to say the right things, but they then have a dream of social improvement. He doesn't want to be Anna Subri. Jesus, no. No, good God, no.

And then the Greens are just Tory's freds. Smelly Tories. Yeah, it's not called the Green Party. And yeah, so some marginal parties picked up seats. Marginal irrelevant parties like that. Marginal irrelevant groups like the Liberal Democrats. Bin. Yeah, so I mean, the one thing I find interesting is that there has been a

concerted media effort to say that Labour failed. Fucking wild, isn't it? Yeah, it's really, really wild. I mean, we did a really, really good job continuing on from the general election, in which we got the biggest amount of votes we got since like 1945. I think John Curtis just recently, John Curtis is a kind of politics wonk. Am I thinking of the same? Is he a good one or a bad one?

He's relatively impartial. Oh, okay. I was thinking though, there was someone for the express who has a relatively similar name, who I was going to say he's more of a politics wank. This one's good. I mixed up my courtesies. Yeah, because he's good, you know. We've gone out the official trash future, good or bad on the time.

Vote that we got yesterday, we would win, well, the Tories would lose 38 seats to us. And that's just off that vote. That's not including the youth swing that always comes with us. And the additional dynamics as well, that we have in a general election of like, it's a big thing that everybody's discussing. Like, no one gives a shit about local elections, really. Only the politically tuned in really care about us. We care about it.

But when a whole country starts talking seriously and the media laws start kicking in properly, then you can start seeing things, you know, going our way. And you can actually see in the foreseeable future, you know, building on this result, a socialist led labor government. Hell yeah. Because we, here's the weird thing, it's, I'm striving to explain why the fuck, despite the fact that we had a historically good local election result, winning a historically high amount of seats.

The media has said that we're not, we didn't do a good job. The only thing I can guess. Everyone's cop. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is that the police? The police union.

The police union. For a country that claims that the police forces are dying. Yeah. Well, we don't have any police, but we have cops. A riddle throughout the establishment. The police, the police don't like the Tories anymore, they do they? So, I mean, I was the things that I've sort of seen. And you have the inside track of what's kind of going on.

But the main kind of lines that most people are taking are one, that labor may have kind of overshot its expectations. It, you know, after the general election where every where it did a lot better than everyone expected, and maybe even concluding people in the party, they may have set those expectations higher. And this is also like in the wake of like the Windrush scandal, and this general idea anyway, that the government is kind of polling at like record lows. I don't know how true or false that is.

The second part is the anti-Semitism scandal, and certain areas with like high Jewish populations who would have naturally voted for labor, instead of opting for other parties or like not voting at all. And the third one was this claim that UKIP, because UKIP was absolutely demolished, to the point where Jared Batson, who's like the interim leader of UKIP, actually likened the party to like the Black Plague today. Every, every leader of UKIP is an interim leader of UKIP, I should point that out. Well, there is a thing about like, you know, we'll, we'll like,

nod your mark free, like be making a return. And he hasn't ruled it out apparently. So like, there you go. I for one am Raheem Khasam 2020. Ride or die, bitches. You might not be the next UKIP leader, but you might be the last one. Everyone who takes over UKIP is like the people who took over Russia in 1905. They kind of, they kind of know what's gonna happen.

Yeah, there's a thing also that like the UKIP vote has kind of all largely gone to the Tories. There's some spatterings of like people who like for some reason went from UKIP to Lib Dem. Cops. That's interesting, isn't it? Yeah, and then like, that's a really rogue move. And the UKIP in places like Thoric though, which is a seat we need to win at the next general election, the vast majority of the UKIP vote actually went to us. Yeah.

You know, proving that actually, you know, there's a lot, you know, debate about Brexit and, you know, some sort of big culture or whatever, which is, you know, obviously clearly like negatively affecting us in some areas, but in other areas, too, there's always been this very serious Euroscepticism, which wasn't necessarily racism, you know, genuinely was not necessarily racism. I saw this fun tweet today that basically said, that's from like one of these like FBPP bros. That was just like, you know, if this is like the last election where like,

A multi hashtag, brother. If this is the last election where like British people, like you can vote in a British election or a European election, it makes, you know, it makes complete sense for people to vote for parties like who may be like the last chance to like stop Brexit. And it's kind of like, okay. So you kind of, so you basically just like let the Tories win. I think it's fucking delayed it. To own the lips.

The best one was the one that I found when the, where the guy was tweeting like, in this election, you have to vote for remain parties only and we have to remove Jeremy Corbyn as the leader of the party because he's pro Brexit. Even voting Tory achieves this objective. And it's like, you just said only vote for parties are in favor of remain. Well, I think one of my sort of like, one of the things that I noticed about this is number one, I think people, as Labour said itself, an enormously ambitious gore. Yeah.

Really, really serious stuff. And you can see why they did that because obviously no one expected us to, you know, perform as well as we did in on June the 8th, 2017. And we've just been in permanent campaigning mode ever since and what we were going to do was we were trying to take Westminster, Kensington and Chelsea, Wandsworth and Barnett. And a few of the ones to like Trafford in Manchester. Did.

Which we certainly did. Well, we became the largest party. Yeah. And it took control of the council. Yeah. We did really well. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah.

And but we shout out to Manchester momentum, by the way, the by far the best momentum group in the country and really, really turned people out. Really turned them out in the streets. Marcus, you're splitting the left right now. No. Manchester men and the bosses, man. They're good. The boss, man.

This. But the other thing is just fostering healthy free market competition within the last labor didn't we didn't achieve the incredibly ridiculous goals we set for ourselves. A lot of people have been saying that labor needs to refocus on family flag and work. Geez. I mean, they say this again and again and again. Why all those things suck. Right.

Well, it's just like the flag is dumb. Like it's it's only got three colors and it's just a bit. It's just some dumb ass flapping in the wind, right? Like it doesn't even have the shahada on it. Like I don't not I'm not interested. Number two, family like family who has no flames on it. Literally who needs that? Like like my mom moved here and now she just calls me all the time.

And like my family where the people were getting mad at me for stealing vodka out of the like out of the like family bar when I was like, you know, 14. So Ben and then work work is literally the worst thing you can do. Like it's there's never been a worse thing than imagining that there is dignity and like renting yourself out to someone who's going to give you less than the value of what you're doing. Why Corbin has to refocus on the three worst things I could imagine. It's so out of step with the public mood as well. You know, like the whole well, the labor voting public are clearly just interested in some very

serious transformative change in the country and just drop into this really quite like quite fucked up and, you know, quite deluded politics of pessimism. And there's always that thing is like local elections. It's kind of like it's all about the bins. It's all about what party will like take your bins out two or three times a week. What if we voted to the conservatives to punish them by making them interact with the bins? I mean, I've always found that like a bit patronizing in some ways, isn't it? It's kind of like, um, but also like I'm not in some ways.

I have a lot of respect for people who only care about bin collections because like they've got an issue and they stick to it. So that's your thing. I don't care about you. I don't care about big geopolitical forces. I don't care about fairness and our society. I care about will they collect the bin. It's like, no, stop diverting the question like thing in British politics too.

You know, it's like people care about competency. It's like that's fucking mental. People care about like changing the world and fucking like what your country, what your society is going to look like. That's like really weird low level technocracy. So the thing that I found confusing of the pundit tree is I am going to found the bin party and we're just going to have one issue. Okay. In local elections, people give people only care about bins.

They only care about, you know, how many, you know, if the bin man will come in like, you know, remove all your like mistresses, you know, uh, leftover, uh, leftover lingerie. If it's the, if it's the Tory party we're talking about, it's, if they'll remove your mistresses school bag. But if that's the case with like, why... Big shelter, hungry beetles. Wrecked. If that's the case, and why would you like, you know, why devote so much pundit tree to

like, you know, anti-corbanism? Why would you devote so much pundit tree to like, you know, this is a, this is a reflection of like a crisis in the labour party or like a crisis of like, you know, you know, indicative of like, why people care so much about like racism and labour party. You know, that, you know, the latter could very well be true. Like, could that, could very well be a factor as to, you know, there's an argument to be made that says that, you know, if that wasn't there, maybe labour would have done a bit better in certain areas.

I think that's true. I think that's 100% true. But what I found confusing was just like, it was just the nature of the pundit, like the nature of the pundit tree itself and the fact that, again, we, we kind of, is this space where like, we haven't really escaped like 20, you know, we haven't even, we haven't really escaped like the Corbin election, right? We haven't escaped 2016. And that's kind of, and I think even in like, things that are largely mundane and like, I didn't stay up all night to like, watch, you know, watch the election results because I stayed up all night to actually watch this

anime series called Cowboy Bebop, which is a very, which is a very basic anime. It's not good. It's not actually that good to be honest. It's really good. Come on. No, it sucks. It's lame. We'll have words about this later. Yeah. You know, I spent my time doing something productive. Did Hussain just admit that some anime was bad? It doesn't, like, it doesn't, it didn't really feel as significant as like,

it sort of, it was sort of made out to be today on the news. I don't know. I don't know. Like, to me anyway, just like, it sort of feels just a bit bland, but as someone who kind of is in the labour track, like, what do you kind of think? What do you think this kind of indicates about where the party goes up to the next general election? I think we just have to keep maintaining consistency. You have to keep on building stuff. I mean, in quite a lot of places, like in Calder Valley, in Thorough, Milton Keynes South,

you know, we're clearly making the sort of inroads that we need to, you know, win these constituencies to form us like a labour government in the next general election. I really, I don't know. I think a lot of this, a lot of the analysis about it is very wayward. If anything, it should just more be like an organisational analysis of why we were telling people we can do this and do that when it never fell out on the ground. It was, it was more of a mobilisational analysis, I think really, beyond any kind of like, oh, why have we done terribly? Because we've done excellently. And I think, like, one of the things that strikes me, I'm just going to grab,

say I'm going to scroll through and build on something you said earlier. Well, about cowboy bebop. No, I'm going to tear that down later. Because it's a good show. No, I'm is you're saying like, is that the media will often, especially you'll see this on like sort of centrist guardian columnists. Jonathan Friedland didn't do such a bad job today, credit to him. But they will thoughtful ones, didn't they? Yeah, I've sat down with thoughtful ones.

You know what, over a long enough period of time, his two brain cells will collide. I like his fan fiction. I like Jonathan Friedland, John Rental, slash fiction. That's bullshit, too. He's like a journalist. He's like 65 brain cells. Okay, no, he knows loads of words. John Rental knows so many words. So many words. Why am I rather will definitely not resign fame.

He just loves words. If anything, he is a bibliophile. Which is why he's not allowed in my near my Bibles anymore. Pages keep sticking together. You know, what you're saying is that basically is that a lot of these commentators in the same breath will say local elections are just all about the bins. People just want to know where the bins are going. People need to dispose of evidence. When are the fucking bins getting taken out?

About the binge in Spain. But at the same time, they're going to say, ah, Corbin's stance on Brexit is hurting him in the local elections. Yeah. What does that have to do with the bins? It's really quite, you know, deranged and, you know, wild. It's almost as though our media class is perhaps one of the stupidest of all of the core capitalist companies in these countries.

Did you see the meltdown they had about Owen Jones basically saying they all think the same things? Someone from the FBPP group has definitely written an article about how Brexit will affect bin collections. That's definitely happened. Slightly, slightly moving on is we sort of know that one of the main reactions to this election was labor is the traditional ones. Labor has to get more racist was one. That's that's one of my favorite ones.

It seems to be the only solution for some people. You know, I mean, yeah, this is this is what I say to most problems in my life. I just need to get more racist. There's no interest in ever shaping the debate, is there? So like, for example, in in Havering, which has always been a very eucepy area, kind of old East London style, old East London style place, you know, like a very, very good momentum candidates like Nicholas West was standing there. And, you know, they were saying and they got they were getting like the national press like

asking them for what their thoughts were on it. And they were like, well, you know, people care about like housing and the NHS and education more than they care about immigration. And that's, you know, that's not not just by like, you know, by the grace of God. It's happened because Jeremy Corbyn's leadership has been hammering these questions time and time again, rather than like playing to people's fucking more baser instincts about fucking immigration. If you're more racist, then you can make more mugs.

And we are pro-merch podcasts, right? I want one of those mugs. I really honestly do want one. They're really rare. They must be somewhere. They must be knocking around somewhere. It's that, again, for American listeners, Ed Miliband made, basically in order to try to appeal to Chud Britain, more or less,

made, created a series of promotional mugs that only had the words sensible controls on immigration printed on them. I think it just said controls and immigration controls and immigration. Yeah, controls on immigration. I like that. That like that before I guess the thing. Everyone was like, oh Corbyn's wrecking the Labour Party. It's like they've totally forgotten that Ed Miliband like single-handedly kept the

granite carving industry alive when he like, you know, when he chiseled into a rock, like, I'll kick out the browns. That's the best artifact is the rock. I want a mug made out of that fucking rock. No, the Ed Stone is in honey. Again, for the American listeners, he literally did this. Yeah, he made a huge fucking tombstone, really. I remember like when he got interviewed about it, he was just like,

so when I get into number 10, I'll put it in the garden of number 10. And every morning I'll go and read it to understand what my mission to the British people was. It's incredibly normal. It's as though he just got a copy of the Daily Mail chiseled onto a piece of stone. 2001, a disgrace, I'll just say. I mean, that's normal fucking behaviour, isn't it? I mean, like the way, I mean, because Ed Miliband is quite like a charming and interesting, like just like North Londoner.

You know, he's an interesting guy to talk to. He's really well read. His podcast is actually not as bad as I thought it would be. Yeah, same. Yeah, I thought the same. And like, you know, he's fucking from an interesting family. Like he's evidently got a social conscience. I joined the party in 2000 and tend to vote for him.

And let me come on the podcast. I'm sorry about making fun of you. And I'm so, so sorry. You know, like fucking the way the way that all of his advisers. I've heard very good things about Ed Miliband actually. I got a mate who used to work with a lot of people in Labour who worked with Ed Miliband at the time who said that they thought Ed Miliband got terrible advice and he got like loads of conflicting advice from like different media, like his own media people,

which is why he basically ended up saying like nothing and the wrong thing all at the same time. Appalling advice from like very similar people to the people who now want to tell Corbyn what to do and Corbyn has just fucked them all off entirely and stuck with the trade union movement. And it's, it's paid off pretty handsomely for him to be quite frank. Because these people are ghouls. Again, in the case of some of them, they do look like Nosferatu. They fucking don't like an, I may not be named. I know I've been hitting John Rental hard in this episode.

But we haven't talked to him in a while. Oh, Nick Cohen too. He also looks like Nosferatu. I mean, Jonathan Friedland looks like, um, looks like a zombie, but who got zombified in chess club. My man putting Queen to E5, but also is putting tooth to your brain. I guess like there's a sphere though that some people, some people mentioned before the local election, which was whether kind of scandals like the anti-Semitism scandal, other like

racism related scandals are kind of being weaponized by specifically the Tories, but other like right-wing parties or like anti-Corbyn factions. And that will undermine kind of the overage because like the lesson that we took from the general election was obviously like these big messages about like more equitable system, more like equal distributive societies, ones where, you know, we care a lot about housing, we care about communities, we care about a future in Britain that isn't like inherently racist. Um, you know, big wishes for that. But that stuff is kind of really powerful at unifying people.

That was like the big lesson I think most people took away from that. But then there was always that question about like momentum, like how long can you hammer that message? And what are the things that can kind of like destabilize it? And there was fear among like left-wing kind of groups that I'm part of, which were like, you know, is the anti-Semitism stuff, is that going to really undermine the overall mission? And I guess our fear is still there.

Like, you know, and what are your thoughts on that? Like, do you think that, I mean, we're going to see more scandals like this? Yeah. You know, that's without a question. But was there like something that Labour could have done to kind of manage these situations better? Like, what are your thoughts on like that, like moving forward? Yeah, well, I mean, it was obviously handled absolutely like terribly, to be honest. It took far too long.

It was a really dragged out process. I honestly think it could have just immediately so much of the ill will could have been sorted out by a simple apology from the leadership. I mean, because Corbyn was like truly in the wrong, you know, by, you know, just not, you know, just joining with this. I don't know if American viewers have seen this wild mural. Yeah, there was basically, I love being like the American translator. Yeah.

A lot, like there was, there have like long been kind of the old ghost of anti-semitism lurking around the Labour Party. A lot of the old cranks, basically. It's a real thing. Yeah, it's a real thing. And I think it's mostly with the older. Yeah. And there's a real, there's a real kind of like amnesia with them all as well, you know.

So when you get people like Jackie Walker, who God willing, you know, will be expelled from the Labour Party, but it's currently suspended. You know, she comes out saying that like Holocaust Memorial Day doesn't commemorate victims of other genocides, which is like patently untrue. She consistently says this despite the fact she's been like corrected on multiple occasions. She spoke at a Labour Party fringe meeting in 2016, in which she was like, really like a cynically questioning why Jewish community schools have to have armed protection. You know, and it's just like, you're a fucking disgrace.

And the people are just willing to line up behind her and say, this is disgusting that she's being suspended from the Labour Party for criticising Israel. Yeah. And that lost his Barnett. Yeah, certainly did. That lost his Barnett. It certainly did. To anybody who was there.

And that's what they all say. You know, there's a very, very real fear, but clearly like the Labour leadership doesn't need to get around the table, you know, with the Jewish communal leadership and like all the loss of the beat root together. Right. Oh, the Judas thing. I fucking love that. So funny.

Well, that's the thing too, because all these weird centrists have this real thing about antisemitism, these real thing about antisemitism, don't they? And as soon as Corbyn speaks to some left-wing Jews, suddenly they fucking freak out. They're not real Jews. They're not real Jews. Yeah. No, they're just left-wing. Yeah.

Well, it's like, but then I think it's like, it's that, this is actually something I talked about with Matt on All the Best, right? Which is that in a party of 500,000 people, because there is a border, a background social level of antisemitism, there are going to be antisemites. It exists in society, doesn't it? Yeah. Therefore it exists in the party. And there are those in the Tories as well.

If anything, I would argue the Tories are more systematically racist than labor. The only issue is that labor, because we are claiming a moral position, where we want to make life better and more equitable for everyone, have more of a responsibility to stamp it out. Yeah, we want to be the society we want to create. The Tories don't really have a responsibility to stamp it out, because if they could get elected, in fact, they do get elected by saying they're going to reduce the number of brown people around.

Of course, yeah. That's a thing they get elected on. And so they represent all the uglier instincts and aspects of British society, don't they? And so if we're going to run against them, our responsibility is to be better than them. Yeah, completely. And maybe we would have won Barnett if the leadership had taken it more seriously. I still have you know, you'll be eating those words, because Robert Halfon thinks the Tories should rebrand as the Workers' Party.

Oh, Jesus, that's right. The Workers' Party. Yeah, National Workers' Party, perhaps. Maybe they should flirt with Socialism and become a national... Socialism is a popular ideology at the moment. So maybe the Tories should rebrand as National Socialist Workers' Party. Who's that? I was going to say, I'm with Liz Kendall.

Oh, you're the only one? Yeah, I mean, I'm manufacturing t-shirts right now. Liz Kendall's Freedom Fighters. Liz Bulla, as we call ourselves. No, that's Liz Truss' Freedom Fighters or Liz Bulla. Liz Kendall, oh, fuck, it's Liz. I'm tired. I'm tired.

Liz Truss running the only Haram branch of Hezbollah. I was thinking, like, Liz Kendall has that photo of her on a tank. So that, like, it would have made good merch. But yes, Liz... That's the anime tank girl. Liz Kendall's Army, otherwise known as Liz Bulla. And we're, you know, we're rebranding the Tory Party as, you know, for future thinkers and entrepreneurs and delivery connoisseurs.

You'll listen to sensitive tycoons. The April Fool's episode where Liz Truss, not Liz Kendall, took over RSS feed for being too negative. I'm so tired. I'm tired. I know. Politics, folks. It's not good.

Let's do... Can you do another 20 on... He's tired because he's just come from his job with delivery. So one thing that I notice is that every time anything happens in England at all, a number of Labour MPs will take it as an opportunity to say that Jeremy Corbyn is no longer fit to lead the Labour Party. Oh, they're fucking disgrace, aren't they? I took a particularly bad shit this morning.

And then Chris... What constituency does it represent? Yeah, Chris Leslie had a tweet about it. We need free movement of poo. I mean, jokes aside, it is a fucking disgrace that the membership has to just prop up these MPs. I mean, I've got two... I've got three things on my mind, actually, that I want to talk about before we close out. I want to talk about two of these MPs and I want to talk about the voter ID thing.

So should we do the voter ID thing first and then have our dessert of the MPs? Yeah, that's fair enough. I really want a voter ID card so I can pull it out like a Yu-Gi-Oh! card. It's time to vote! I would like 100% do that. It's Sodia! Vote Lib Dem! It's Seto Kai.

I was like, Blue Eyes White Dragon is powerless! I mean, it would certainly be like better than me going to the voting booth every time and just showing them a match-amp card. So you can't show your bad cards. We've been through this. You're not as ripped as Matt. No matter how much we all want to fuck match-amp.

No, I'm sorry. If you've got a shiny voter ID card, you can vote twice. I remember this because I have a weird photographic memory. So I remember all my children's cartoons that I watched when I was like as young as six. You can't remember where your children's time stays. No, of course not. Fuck those guys. I already told you family's dumb.

Family's like the lamest thing. You know what's the matter? It's the first time they busted. It's the family you choose, like in the Sopranos. You know, this is family. This is meaningful. This man is like your father. No, because basically a number of wards in the UK were piloting

the dumbest, most reactionary policy that's ever been invented. Voter ID. Bad. I mean, yeah, it's pretty ugly. And it's clearly an attempt to stifle the Labour vote as well. I mean, it completely disenfranchises the most like marginalised people in society. It's enfranchises like, you know, black and ethnic minority people. People who are less likely to have documentation.

Yeah, completely. Citizens, they live there. They're loud to vote. Yeah, it's a very pernicious and ugly thing to do to someone. And because basically the Tories stir up fear that like, you know, there's going to be a Labour government because a bunch of people are going to come vote and then put on like groucho, Marx glasses with like a big nose and a fake mustache.

Yeah, go vote again as Guy incognito. It's based on this idea that there are going to be voter fraud, which is completely absurd. Fortunately, though, the home office and the Tories have a really good record with checking and issuing documentation to brown people. So that won't be a problem. And so they piloted this actually. And one of the boroughs, this scheme basically to disenfranchise

like working class and non-white, mostly Labour voters under the again, under the guise of stopping someone dressed as Mickey Mouse from voting twice in order to combat this imaginary idea of voter fraud. They piloted it in Swindon. It worked in Ogdenville in North Havrebrook. I've done voter ID pilot trials in Swindon. Swindon is quite North Havrebrook actually. Oh, yeah. Well, my girlfriend's from Swindon.

Oh, really? Yeah, she's in the room, folks. Say that to her face, Riley. Hey, you're from Swindon. What do you think about that? A deafening silence. He's not responding. Anyway, they piloted this in Swindon. They have no response.

Where the Tories, I believe quite narrowly took control or narrowly held off a Labour surge. Swindon was quite narrow. Very marginal, yeah. Very close. And I wonder, had they not done the voter ID trial, what could have been? Could have gone a different way. I think it's entirely possible.

Yeah, of course. I mean, there's some very serious political motivations behind what they do, you know? And I wonder why they piloted it, where they piloted it. It's almost as though there are a bunch of cynical bellends who'll do anything to hang on to power. Absolutely. And it's also the same as, you know, when we were at our lowest ebb and they called the election, it was clear just to destroy the organised Labour movement

and its political expression. And, you know, even slightly before that, when the boundary changes were happening, and like Labour were basically set to lose so many safe seats, you know, in the cause of, you know, fairness for Tory voters, just to get much, much better at Tory enfranchisement. Genuinely appalling stuff. Well, there's one thing I kind of want to move to,

which is talking a little bit about MPs. Before we get that, there are some Labour MPs and journalists. Do seem as though they are calling for solidarity with Amber Rudd by saying everyone should vote Tory. It's wild. Did you see the Lisa Nandi tweet about that? I voted Tory. I voted Tory because I'm tired of the Tory as being called right wing. That's right.

I'm calling people right wing is actually right wing. It creates a toxic culture. It doesn't benefit the left. It doesn't benefit anybody. It's actually violence. The only way the only way the left will get into power is if we vote for the Tories and the Tories vote for us. Yeah. Okay. That's right. That's right. That's politics.

A true expression we believe in our institutions. But we believe in the norms of politics. What did Lisa Nandi say? Oh, so she made this tweet, which is let me see if I can find it. Then we'll go on to Jess Phillips and surprise MP. That's real dessert. The surprise MP is great. So Lisa Nandi did this tweet, which was like, oh, you know,

well, you know, he that shall not be named actually did a good tweet too. As well, didn't he? Being like, you know, be careful, be careful for what you wish for. If you want to get rid of Amber Rudd, someone worse is going to come along. It's like fucking off. Like, of course, when we get rid of these people, we want to get rid of all of them.

In some ways, I think there are some, there are some Tory ministers who'd be kind of relieved if they lost power. But Lisa Nandi was, I can't find the tweet, but she basically made a tweet which said that, you know, it doesn't benefit the left to it. Oh, here we are. Oh, it's even better than I remembered. I love that. Yeah. It's like, oh, it's way better.

Too many people gleefully celebrating the home secretary's resignation are doing us no favours. Inhumanity creates a destructive, sour political culture that spills over into policy and makes victims of the powerless, including migrants. It offers no future for them or the left. I mean, she's right 100% about almost everything. Yeah. This is a woman who, you know, like Amber Rudd

is a politician who was, you know, pretty seriously responsible for like stripping migrants in this country of like their rights to health care. As an immigrant, I hate her. Yeah, right. Yeah. You know, and she's created like a vile political culture based around like what the Murdochs want the Murdochs get and destroyed the social fabric of Britain and North austerity.

But we have to be nice to her because if there's one thing I've learned is that it's not the policies that you enact that count. It's what you think despite those policies. Politics is a serious game, but it is a game and you need to respect the players in the game. Of course. You know, it's not about people's lives

or fucking child poverty or suicide. It's hard out there for a pimp. Right? Like Amber Rudd. The one thing which I do agree with is that I think that celebrating Amber Rudd's resignation is completely pointless because obviously they'll just replace her with someone just as bad,

which they have done with Sujid Javid. Like nothing actually changes because she's resigned. It's like a pointless, symbolic embarrass for both sides. Yeah. No, it's always good to have some real embarrassment. And she's, don't forget, in her constituency, she's clinging on by 346 votes. Gone.

She'll be gone, right? Yeah, she's over. I cannot wait for her political career to be gone. The only problem is she's going to have a podcast. She might say, where does she stand on the bench? I demand to know. Amber Rudd, I'm sorry what I said. Take me on your podcast.

The other MP I want to talk about is one Jessica Phillips. Oh, the only Labour MP that I think is actively campaigning for the Tories and who mostly gives interviews to the Sun. She's a big fan of the Sun. Nice. She tweets this morning because Jess Phillips is very keen. She sees Corbin as more of her opponent than the Tories. Genuinely.

She's got a real obsession, like a pathological obsession with Jeremy Corbin. And so this is an example of, I think, a certain kind of like centrist Labour MP reaction. To the local elections, where she says, up and at them. So she did the radioactive man rot line correctly, at least. Up and at them. I see everyone is claiming failure as victory. Again, a historically good local election result that didn't meet our ridiculous aims. How is that not victory?

Well, she's like Chuka Ramona's one saying that there needs to be an inquiry into the result. And it's like, what an inquiry into the fact that if this result was generalised across like a national general election campaign, we'd have taken political power. No, the Labour Party can't do that. It'd be mean to the Tories. It would be mean to the Tories. It's just a fair game. It's not fair games.

Winning an election against the Tories. This is bad as calling them right-wing. It's violence. It's just going to perpetuate a culture of partisanship. Yeah. It is violence. It's quite sinister. You know, groups of people patrolling the streets, demanding that, you know,

citizens vote for certain candidates from organised people to party. I mean, what next, when people start referring to coffee as like soup? Shut up. Your hate speech is not welcome on this podcast. It's the same thing where they're like, oh, there's someone else who wrote an article recently. It was like, imagine living in a one party state. I'm not talking about some banana republic. I'm talking about Manchester, which is all Labour.

And it's like, yeah, mate, people like them more than you. Simple as that. Yeah. And we took Trafford Council in Manchester, which is the only conservative controlled borough. I think the best type of politics is if everything is 50-50. All opinions. Yeah. It's just all opinions.

The attack and damage on the attack and damaging your Yu-Gi-Oh card, 50-50. Jess Phillips is then tweeted out by Akiwa, sort of a Mufo of the show. Could you resist talking down your party for one day to which Jess Phillips responds fully like cosmic universe brain? Where did I mention my party? The goggles, they do nothing. Fucking hell, she's got us. It turns out she was just watching.

Clever now, do you? She was watching Golden Girls and she was just talking about the episode. Fuck. Now, no, now we're doing the politics of dominance. Who's got the last laugh now? Oh, God damn it. So she then says, you know what? I've said literally nothing anti-corban or anti-Labor,

yet somehow my Twitter is a toilet of people telling me to join the Tories. I honestly give up. I hope that means she joined the Tories. Well, but in the news of another MP before we close out, because it's getting a little, it's a time tics. The time is ticking. Not only if you believe in linear type, which are not in like, if you're Peter Hitchens,

as we've mentioned on the show before, like if you were Peter Hitchens, you just like wouldn't recognize it at all. I bet Peter Hitchens levitates. You should get Peter Hitchens on this. We've made fun of him too much. He's blocked all of us. His Hitchens come on the show and talk about the conception of time. Let me see if there are a couple more people I want to talk about.

One is there was recent news about a certain MP who I call Penis Penis Penis or John Woodcock. It seems that the, like I said earlier, there are corporate labor MPs. There are Blair labor MPs, but there's only one Justice and Development Party Labour MP. That's right. That's right. The MP for ISIS.

There's only one John Woodcock. Who does John? That's what Mike Shanley calls him. Yeah, John Woodcock, apparently the power of nominative determinism just took hold of him and he was implicated in some impropriety and he fucking suspended. He's in real trouble. How's John Woodcock going to get out of this scrape?

What's Johnny going to do? What Johnny did next? Do you know he's married to Isabel Hardman from the spectator? I only realized when the whole news broke out and everyone was just like, I'm feeling sorry for Isabel Hardman. I was like, why is everyone... Why would anyone ever feel sorry for Isabel Hardman? It was just very confusing.

And then I realized that, oh shit, that's absolutely bizarre. And then I ended up down this rabbit hole of looking at MPs who married prominent journalists. And yeah, so like, you know, with the whole Windrush scandal and like Amelia Jensenman like leading that. And then I found out she was married to Joe Johnson, aka Boris Johnson's brother. Yeah. Yeah.

And this stuff has obviously been like public for ages, but it's like those moments when it just takes you back and you're like, oh, okay, maybe like London isn't good. Boris Johnson definitely leaked all of the Windrush shit to Amelia Jensenman as well. Maybe. Yeah. I mean, like that's not... That's like something that even in like journalistic circles, they're like, oh, that actually could have possibly happened.

Because there were like reporters who were reporting on Windrush stuff for ages. And if you look at like open democracy, for example, there are like reports of like, you know, deportations and stuff dating back to like 2013, 2014. You know, and obviously, like, you know, the work The Guardian's done has been really good work and it's been really important work. But there is that question of like, well, what, you know,

so much information coming at one go. Like, you know, what is the story behind the story? And like, yeah. Anyway, that's about that was how I spent one of my like Thursday evenings. Looking up the marriage, you know, looking up like Tory marriages. It was, it was, it was a puzzle box where when you solved it, you got another emerald. The final emerald.

But I'll be Tory marriages are actually a fascinating thing. Because in the middle of the ceremony, they have to, the bride and groom, you know, they get, they get sort of naked and then they lie down on either side of a sheet with a hole cut in the middle. And then through that hole, you know, they exchange messages about what things they're going to privatise. But yeah, John Woodcock suspended for

John Woodcock is living up to his namesake. Well, it was, I was getting on the tube with Well, hang on. Whoa, sorry. I just realised we didn't actually contextualised. We didn't actually contextualised to the listeners. Why John Woodcock is the MP for ISIS and the fucking AKP, man.

I mean, to explain, back and forth. It's due to a really ambitious bit of boundary redrawing by the Tory government. That's right. He's the MP for Ankara South. MP for Basildon and the Levant. But no, he, so he basically gets, well, I won't say it directly in case it's libelous,

he clearly gets paid a lot of money to lobby on behalf of the Turkish government. He defended the evasion of Afrin. He does lobby on behalf of the Turkish government. We assume we don't know for sure. It's because he gets paid to do so. Yes, he does. Yeah.

So we obviously supported and tried to contextualise in the British media, the Turkish army's effective support for ISIS in crushing the Kurdish population. He hates socialism in Kurdistan and he hates it here. Oh, God. Well, you know what? So as international officer, I sit on the Young Labour National Committee

and that's our first inaugural meeting, which was ostensibly to discuss the upcoming democracy review in the party. We passed a motion supporting the demonstrators in Afrin and supporting the resistance to Turkish forces there. We also included like a condemnation of John Woodcock's behaviour, basically saying that he's supporting

like a fascistic form of rule in Turkey and is, you know, complicit in the deaths of thousands of Kurdish people. And that same day we were laughing because within about like an hour of the release of the statement, he was talking about resigning the Labour whip. No, he is like, it's bad.

You know what we were saying this with Hayley? It's bad that it happened. No questioning that. Couldn't happen to a better guy. Yeah. Oh, couldn't run to a nicer guy, could it? Oh, yeah. So well, I actually heard that the Turkish government

was paying John Woodcock to lobby on behalf of less regular bin collections, which is what I'm really upset about. Fuck you, John Woodcock, you're out. Disgrace the Labour Party. Fuck you, Jess Phillips. Fuck off to the Tories. And everyone talking down the local elections.

I think you can lick all of our collective asses because we actually did a fantastic job. I would rather you didn't lick mine because it's quite ticklish. A very, I'm very sensitive about that area. All right. I think that about does it for this one once again episode of Trash Future, the podcast about how the future

is local elections and how the future is bin collection. Goodbye. Marcus, thanks for coming on. Now, thanks for having me. So I'm a little tired and croaky, but no, we all are. Yeah, the future is all about the bins. If you care about the bins, tweet me. We'll start the bin party.