TRASHFUTURE - *PREVIEW* Gandalf, Take Me to Number 10

Episode Date: July 29, 2023

We went to the Spitting Image musical in the West End. It was worse than we'd ever imagined. It's the closest we've ever come to re-enacting the scary parts of Event Horizon. It's the least funny thing a human can create. And we did it all... for you.   Get the full episode on Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/86768274   *SCOTLAND ALERT* Get tickets to our live show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival on 4th August here! https://www.trashfuture.co.uk/event-details/trashfuture-live-at-the-edinburgh-fringe *STREAM ALERT* Check out our Twitch stream, which airs 9-11 pm UK time every Monday and Thursday, at the following link: https://www.twitch.tv/trashfuturepodcast *WEB DESIGN ALERT* Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ *MILO ALERT* Check out Milo’s upcoming live shows here: https://www.miloedwards.co.uk/live-shows Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), Hussein (@HKesvani), Nate (@inthesedeserts), and Alice (@AliceAvizandum)

and I most beloved member of the royal family, Peruvian cocaine dealer. And there. Yeah. Well, it's the, the whole, I think the, I think the, um, the Paddington cocaine reveal is a wonderful, um, encapsulation of the way that they intend to. There's two ways this show intends to make you laugh. Sure. One is by saying, uh, privileged, saying, privileged race, check your privilege, like as though that's just a nonsense set of words that make no sense.

The second way the show intends to make you laugh is I think the trying to seed itself in the tradition of this particular type of British comedy, where pattington speaks with a lovely accent for a little while and then drops it and says, it's because I put cocaine in the sandwiches, that's how they do the accent, by the way, terrible. And the whole idea is you're supposed to be sort of shocked at your middle class sensibilities, but then you giggle along because you get it. It's trying to flatter its audience. It's

just everybody involved is deranged. Yeah. I mean, wouldn't it be funny if patting some put cocaine in the sandwiches? Yeah, so that's not like his cuddly image. Why didn't they expand on it? I want to see all of the members of the royal family high on cocaine because they've eaten the sandwiches. Like, come on, think about the logical implication. But then you have to do like a high energy prince chance,

which is like innovative and perhaps even fun. You know, I'm fucking buzz. You want to say, come here let me and you, Joby and a small place restaurant. You just sell bloody quails eggs and stuff like that until I'm fucking Randy. So, then they say, okay, we need, pick me, I can take it. We need, this is going to be an impossible mission to save the fabric of society. Why Tom Cruise, why Tom Cruise?

Someone has a Tom Cruise accent on deck. Yeah, it's not very good. This was a, I mean, look, the whole show is a first draft. There was, that's the other thing, right? A lot of the songs they pick don't scan with the lines from TV. So they just either say them really quick or they stretch out the syllables. Like they think they think the song I'm Suella set to thriller by Michael Jackson.

First fucking drafting because every character introduces themselves or is introduced immediately. So that you, you know, you don't pick that up off of the accent or anything else about them. Apart weirdly from Jürgen Klopp who you just have to like take on faith. It's like them. Apart, weirdly from Jog and Klopp, who you just have to like take on faith, it's like, oh fuck, that's Jog and Klopp. There were a bunch of points where I had to whisper in Raleigh's ear who people were. Jog and Klopp was one of them.

Alison Hammond was one of them. I was like, if any of you find this Raleigh, this is a deep cut. I mean, this is like a daytime TV person. Not even like normal TV. But like everyone else, Suella Braveman's first line is like, I'm Sue Allen's, like, okay, cool, thank cool, thank you. That's what Shakespeare always used to do.

I'm gonna introduce new characters. I'm Richard III. Suella Braveman should have been played by a pre-pubescent boy, and then I'm gonna respect it this more in the Shakespearean tradition. So then obviously, so Tom Cruise shows up, sure, why not? It's like, it's like, it's a parody, a spoiler-ish-spitting image. I mean, I also understand, like, it's a parody musical. It's supposed to be like, it's supposed to be like spitting image, satirizing current events, right? They are still just saying, here's a bunch of stuff.

Yeah, the thing is spitting image, it's a skit show, right? So you have a skit. Well, this has, is a bunch of them at once. And it's sort of like a skit show, right? So you have skits. Well, this has is a bunch of them at once. And it's sort of like all piles in together, right? Well, I think this is like the heart of the problem, because I haven't I've watched like one episode of Splitting Image and Ben seen this. So maybe I'm not doing it justice, but it sort of feels like a far more splitting image than any person should. But like the TV show from why I understand are sort of like a series of skits

and most skits are somewhat contained. And so you have like maybe two or three characters who you sort of know the reason why they're there. Like even if the jokes are like hack and kind of like cringe. Yeah, because it'll be like we're in a cabinet meeting. You kind of know why they're there. Yeah, and with a skit show, you can like move first and break back.

And the problem with doing the musical like this is that you're now having to sort of create this weird story that incorporates. Basically, you're trying to sort of create a splitting image, multiverse within their own show. And so they've got to make it make sense. But they also have to sort to keep in spirit with the splitting image thing, which is why you've been on end up in a situation, which we were talking about before we were recording about how these characters are sort of like, they're not really the way in which the characterised are framed round, particular lines that the writers think people know, and also what you should already think of those characters anyway.

Yeah. Yeah. And there are times when like, you know, you have these characters who should not be in the same scenes in these very bizarre situations where like nothing they're saying really makes sense to anyone who hasn't already kind of who isn't like already on board before the show has even stopped it. I think the perfect example of that is when they're like Greta Tunberg, what's well? She's clearly said she's giving all of these ridiculous warnings about the ocean being hot that we find annoying. And so we're going to present these as obviously ridiculous.

And then the other main thing about her is that she's a young woman. So she is going to as soon as she sees the Stormzy character who's wearing a stab vest, immediately start shaking her ass at him and then jump on him because she's in love with him. Right. That, and that's just like what's Greta Tunberg? Well, she's a... She's one of these teenage galses. They want to fuck Stormzy and not me, Matt Foul.

Well, what is the thing about Greta Tunberg? Well, she's a young woman and I find her faintly annoying. So there it is. And that's hilarious if you are the writers of spinning image, or if you are like your brain is in the state of advanced decay. I mean, I think a lot about the scene, sort of, end of act two, where you have a sort of comic grave dicker in the form of Nigel Farage, right, who shows up to,

you know, read everyone for being woke in a way that makes, they're trying to thread the needle of like, he's a Nazi, but he's kind of making some points, right, because these people are annoying. And that's the same, that's the closest thing to a like, uh, sincerity in here, I would say. 100% because for example, he takes everybody to task for all of the things that Matt Ford is also taking them to task for. Megan Markle being sort of annoying in Californian and it's not racist, we just find you personally annoying and gratitude for your sort of ridiculous

and you're sort of ridiculous with your warnings about climate and you're a you're sort of ridiculous with your warnings about climate and you're a young woman in piss off. Angela Rainer is from the North. Yeah, which is unforgivable. They've nailed it that. Yeah, she is. Angela Rainer from the North.

Angela Rainer from the North. And again, she says, she'll fit in a lot. And mostly sort of poor, and her foible that is being satirized is the same thing that Farage points out. This is, as you say else, this is the moment of honesty

where you get to see what they really think. So, but we want to sum, and we've referred to some of the team, right? We've summoned the team, the idiots that assemble. And they, so they get Tom Cruise and Tom Cruise. The whole thing is referencing Marvel, by the way. So that's great. Yeah, that's awesome.

Belly comes up. Yeah. So the so Tom Cruise then assembles his team. The first person Tom Cruise get is and muses. And the fact the team needs to be relevant and inclusive says it three times. And then RuPaul, one of the most relevant people in the entire world shows up. And then then basically the entire joke is just RuPaul is gay. Crazy, the rest of the show.

I would never heard of this. I could help this gay guy. The RuPaul puppet looks the most like RuPaul, I will say that. I think it's just a RuPaul looking quite puppet like. Well, that might be it. But no, it's pretty homophobic, I would say. What? No. Yeah, but there isn't a male character that can come on stage

without RuPaul being like, oh, please fuck me, which is... They've written RuPaul as RuPaul's catchphrase. Yeah, of course. That's the thing though, they've also... This is so poorly observed, because they haven't written RuPaul as like kind of conti and caddy in fashiony. They've written RuPaul as Kenneth Williams Actually, yeah, because the whole point of the spitting average satire is it's trying to satirize things that you can think you understand by looking at a tweet about them.

Yeah, RuPaul RuPaul's gay and a drag queen. Okay, I have her. You know, that's it. I need nothing else. I need nothing else. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And so they're like, well, we have to assemble

some more of our heroes. Let's go to the cabinet. So they teleport to Downing Street where they have a, they have the first two. Yeah, this gave us the line of the musical Which is Gandalf take me to number 10? Oh? Yeah, so the whole thing is hosted by Ian McCallan. Yeah, for no reason It doesn't make any sense. Why is Ian McCallan there? Someone has an Ian McCallan. Yeah, someone had an Ian McCallan

And we all know who Ian McCallan is you know this doesn't sound a lot like Ian McCallan I know it doesn't well and all that's good that they say I need Ian McCallan and we all know who Ian McCallan is. You know who this is. Doesn't sound a lot like Ian McCallan. I'll do it. It doesn't. Well, it's quite good that they say, I'm Ian McCallan. Yeah. And also weirdly, given that every other gay person in the musical, their thing is that they're gay.

And also some straight people in the musical, their thing is also that they're gay, but comedy. Yeah. But Ian McCallan, no reference to him being gay, is made whatsoever. Because they're like, they don't want to upset the boomers who might not know that Ian McKellen is gay. That's true, isn't it? Yeah.

Yeah, it's the only, there are many homosexual characters and that's the main thing about them. No, that's... Yeah, like Vladimir Putin. Yeah, I'm tired, famously.