TRASHFUTURE - *PREVIEW* Joe Pantone ft. Mike Isaac

Episode Date: May 23, 2025

Tech reporter Mike Isaac rejoins us to talk about the antitrust trials against Meta and Alphabet currently winding their way through the US justice system… but we enjoy a pretty significant detour into the world of the paint mafia. Also discussed is a startup “reinventing banking” to help ordinary people invest in high risk private capital projects with their pension funds, the great burrito bust out, and xAI’s wild turn as a white genocide guy. Get the whole episode on Patreon here! *MILO ALERT* Check out Milo’s tour dates here: https://miloedwards.co.uk/live-shows *TF LIVE ALERT* We’ll be performing at the Big Fat Festival hosted by Big Belly Comedy on Saturday, 21st June! You can get tickets for that here! You can also get tickets for our show at the Edinburgh Fringe festival here! Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), Hussein (@HKesvani), Nate (@inthesedeserts), and November (@postoctobrist)

Look, we got a lot to get through today. Mike's going to talk to us sort of towards the final segment a little bit about the FTC anti-trust trials that Google is currently experiencing the consequences of and that Metta is just starting. Oh good. The FTC won't let me be. Yes. Shut me down on MTV. They didn't let Metta buy MTV. They want to be anti-competitive. Jackass can't fall into Zuckerberg's hands. I sort of believe that. Yeah. He'll start doing it in an annoying way at his wife's birthday. I think, I know what Mark Zuckerberg would do if he bought Jackass,

is that he would go and kind of vaguely stand around while they did two or three stunts, and then do one of like the low rent ones where he just gets like stung by a bee, and then he'd be like, no this isn't for me, and then just walk away. Like, his presidential run. ALICE Yeah, yeah. But I think Jackass is also too weird and homosocial for him. But I also have an opinion that is very unpopular at the moment, because Tom Cruise has a new movie out, which is that there is a way to do epic shit that is cringe, right?

It has to do with that kind of confidence and wealth, you know? Like I look at Mark Zuckerberg sort of like wakeboarding with the American flag or whatever, and I look at Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible 19 in much the same way, where I'm like, you're just doing that because you don't believe consequences are real anymore. ALICE It's not like Stevo. If Stevo... consequences are real anymore. It's not like Steve-O. If Steve-O is the most consequence familiar man in the world. Steve-O could wake Bob with the American flag, but Zuckerberg could not fuck Stacey Southerly. And that is the difference.

Steve-O could be in the new mission impossible. We've got to jump the murder line. I'm Steve-O and this is Climbing the Burj Khalifa. Yeah, I don't know why it was necessary for Ethan Hunt to, like, staple his scrotum to his thigh in order to get the nuclear codes, but... It's the only way, Ethan. You've got to let a snake bite your dick. Yeah. It's like Simon Pegg being like, Ethan, the only way to make it through their security

is to set off a metal detector in one very specific way. We need to staple your balls to your thigh Should you choose to accept it is to eat this human turd The codes are playing over a speaker which is inside this diving helmet full of farts. I'm so sorry Ethan You're gonna have to hold your breath Okay, this is the best movie, I think, that's ever. I was gonna say, this needs funding. This is incredible. Yeah, we need to re- we need to fund- the jackass guys now in their, like, what, 50s, 60s,

need to come do Mission Impossible 7. Have you seen Johnny Knoxville walk? Like, try to walk? He looks fucked up. It's really like it has caught up to his body I don't know guys all of their joints sound like a bag full of marbles being rolled down a marble staircase. It's it's like I mean the thing about the the latest jackass is that they tried to pass the baton But the only people who are interested in doing that jackass shit a weird trans people and I look forward to that becoming the new Normal, you know? Oh, oh no, he's blown my dick off.

Oh, oh! That's not what I wanted to happen at all. Gender affirming care in Britain. UK jackass. Oh, yeah. Oh boy. I'm Jane Knoxville. Yeah, Jane-ass.

Yeah, I mean, I'd be so scared if I was in a raspy voice competition in my, I was up against Steve-O and Emily Maitlis. Listen, Steve-O, I've had 400 B&H and I'm here to ask you some questions about why you stapled your scrotum to your leg. The interview that changed everything. I just don't understand how that was going to help us save the world. We got Steve-O. Almost no one can get that unless they email him.

Handing Ethan Hunter costume and it's like an old man costume and he's like, oh yeah, classic. And then like a handful of Viagra and he's like, what are these for? Okay. All right. It's time to talk about some stuff. Some stuff, some things. Items. Yes. Darios. Item the first, Dario item the first. This is like, I said I'm not gonna do any UK news today,

but there's one thing that I cannot not talk about. Okay. Yeah. You're a junkie, I understand. We mentioned this to Mike just before we started. Yeah, tell me. Which is, we had to speak sort of carefully about this because I believe there's now, these guys have been charged and there's a trial ongoing, but the guys who've been charged,

the three like Ukrainian, Romanian guys who've been charged with setting a bunch of fires outside of Keir Starmer's house, there is now a kind of consensus building either by like blue check Twitter people who are just saying it or people like Enunciata Rees Rees Mog who are like hinting at it, which is that... Announcement Rees Mog. She's not an announcement to make, right? Yeah. Announcement Rees Mog. Which is that the three guys, because one of them has like an amateur modeling profile.

All of them. This is like genuinely, at least two, maybe all three of them are, as the BBC tactfully puts it, aspiring actors or aspiring models. Right? If you follow that. All publicity is good are, as the BBC tactfully puts it, aspiring actors, or aspiring models. Right? If you follow that. All publicity is good publicity, Pasha. It's good guerrilla marketing. Why do I have to explain everything to you?

In addition to being what could possibly be a really wonderful Coen Brothers movie premise. Oh yeah. The time three Ukrainian twinks burned down the Prime Minister's old flat. Yes. Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly. Sorry.

Maybe. We can't say for sure. Yeah, no, legally, right, there are lots of... We see what they want to do with this, right? Which is... Everyone involved in this wants there to be a big tabloid headline that's like, gay stum as a Ukrainian bumsex rent boy scandal. Yeah. But the thing is, that's just creeping Americanization!

Yeah. That's just the Obama limo story repurposed for here! I dunno. Except it's actually also the plot of the film JFK. There's a gay conspiracy to kill Keir Stama. Fine, I just didn't expect them to be Ukrainian. Yeah. You're liberal, Mr. I just didn't expect them to be Ukrainian Now the British government would have you believe I'm not sure I'm not convinced that that's true because to me Stammer Ukrainian rent boy bum sex scandal or whatever the fuck they want to print about this

Would be that would make me feel proud to be British, right? Like it's not a long list of things that make me proud to be from this country, but that would be up there. Not since the times of John Profumo, if we had a proper bum sack scandal. It's true, it's like, you barely even get Tories killing themselves with, like, auto-erotic asphyxiation anymore, right? Like some good, old fashioned sleaze? Gay Prime Minister? It would be like back in the 60s again. Well, the quality of the doors in some of these new builds, you can barely even hang

a belt off them. That's the truth of it. You know, if you live in a persimmon house, good luck dying in a wanking accident. That door frame's gonna give way long before you asphyxiate sunshine. In a way, it's a yourself and safety. Yeah. Why do you think Margaret Thatcher tried to popularize Barrett homes among Tories in the 1990s? Yeah. And it's a good job you can't come because it's going to go straight through the plaster balls. Look, so we legally cannot really say much else about this other than it seems like the

consensus on the right is that he was fucking them or they were fucking him and either he didn't pay or jilted all three of them. Yeah, yeah. The kind of arson you only see in Eastern European sex work. Yeah. I mean, I think the only position we can legally take is, damn, it's crazy that that happened. Which is helpful for me because that's also my personal feeling. That is a pretty good response to most things.

Yeah. I think Lord Ali should be paying Keir Starmer's rent boy bill. Clearly he's hard up. Yeah, that's right. It's like when we did the clothing scandal, it turned out that all of those, all the clothes that he bought supposedly for Starmer are a bunch of size XS mesh tank tops. It all fits together. I like to wear them to the gym. There's another thing I wanted to talk about. That breathable.

Another thing I want to talk about is, this is something we've been alluding to for a moment, but for approximately, well, Mike, actually is this still going on? Is Grok still steering conversations towards questions of white genocide in South Africa? Or have they fixed that in what apparently is their test and prod environment? Oh my God. It, no, so yeah, exactly. It was, I imagine you guys have talked about it a little bit before, but like it's, it was this thing where they did come out with a post-mortem, but opaquely worded saying, you know, like a random or rogue employee basically like put like made a change.

Some rogue South African at three in the morning. Yeah. Fucking like, yeah. Prime time hours for some people to be up and doing things. So that was like the most. And then they published like, here are some of the commit changes to our code because we're going to try to be transparent. But like, so they ended that, but then it also started doing a different thing, which

was like have the politics of a 13 year old boy who listens to like system of down and then says like, don't trust anyone, don't trust the government. Everything should be suspicious. Excited for Grok to transition in about five years time. Yes another one of Elon's children. Wake up, wake up, Grok a man allowed to wear a little make up. Grok's like no.