TRASHFUTURE - *PREVIEW* Witless for the Prosecution

Episode Date: September 19, 2025

The world’s most regular man takes the stand in his own defence and proceeds to… utterly waste the court’s time arguing about pronouns. Also, we talk about the ongoing collapse of civil liberties on both sides of the Atlantic, and consider what it means when the leaders of both major parties in the UK simply seem to not want their jobs very much. Get the whole episode on Patreon here! *MILO ALERT* Check out Milo’s tour dates here: https://www.miloedwards.co.uk/liveshows Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), Hussein (@HKesvani), Nate (@inthesedeserts), and November (@postoctobrist)

Also, I wanted to say we are all recording. Not in our usual location. It's Riley Nova and Nate. We are recording from the brand new Charlie Kirk Pub in West London. Yeah, that's why my connection's so bad. The Charlie Kirk Pub does not pay for good internet. A great place to wet your whistle, I've heard. So this is a new development. The pub, which used to be called Biddy Mulligans in Hammersmith. Yeah, but you should have heard some of the things that Biddy Mulligan said about the Civil Rights Act. You know, like if anything, she made Charlie Culligan. Kirk looked like a liberal. Yeah, Biddy Mulligan was very against home rule. So this is as noted in a press release obtained by Fox News Digital. So Fox News Digital said their best men on the case. And they've discovered that the Biddy Mulligans is now called the Trump Arms and has converted their entertainment lounge. So I guess like the room where they have the big TV loudly playing sports all the time into,

and I shit you not, the Charlie Kirk Memorial Debate Room. That's very epic. Thank you. You know, I guess I shouldn't be surprised, and I shouldn't be surprised this in West London, in the sense that one presumes that the owners of said pub in West London are shitheads with too much money at this point. But I just, who cares? Who fucking care? I'm sorry, I don't want to be like that right off the bat.

Also, not that it's going to save them. I think it's literally like you will do potentially anything up to an including turning your pub into a gigantic memorial for a murdered podcaster. order to stave off the fact that it is impossible to run a pub in this country. So I wish to like Trump Maga Arms every success, obviously, but like it's going to go the way of every other pub in London, which is just, you know, not well. Yeah, but what I'm going to do is I'm shining my big Humphrey Smith searchlight. Humphrey, you must come to London. Yeah, I mean, say this, Humphrey Smith would never stand for this.

Humphrey Smith does not want a kind of like maga conservatism in his pubs. What he wants is the kind of like horse and cart kind of conservatism. Yeah, he's like, he's like, this is not a vicar on a bike. And I refute, this is not a vicar on a bike, you're playing TV, you've named a room, you've acknowledged the existence of the internet. I'm sorry, I'm afraid I have to close this pub immediately. You named the debate room after a guy born in 1993. That's so far in the future.

What the fuck are you talking about? So Damien Smythe, the pub's landlord, said millions of people around the world have been left horrified that a decent family man could be slaughtered during an peaceful and open public debate. We owe it to his wife to send a clear message that we stand against the rise of left wing extremism. I mean, if you saw the statement that his widow put out that was like, you have no idea the fire you ignited in this wife, maybe the fire we ignited, I say we, like, we killed him. Maybe the fire that we ignited in this wife was opening a pub in West London or rebranding a pub in West London. Well, I mean, I saw the weird AI shit that was being tweeted by like American conservatives and also government offices of like AI, you know, he's friends with Malcolm X in heaven or whatever. And all I can say is it's Malcolm X played by Denzel Washington in the film from the 90s looking down on that scene and that pub owner and be like, oh, that brother's starving. So I do want to talk a little bit more about an event that I'm increasingly calling the Reich Donald's fire as it.

develops live. That's good. That's not that's not all at all. I think we can really lead with that. As I said in the last episode, it's a movement of of buy and four posters. So they're still mainly just posting. They're talking about posting. But because it's a union of I've seen it called a fusion of Q and on and government think is true. But it's just a move a fusion of posters posting concerns and government. It's like, you know, guys like Matt Walsh, people who are like, well, I became famous by posting. I became ingrained in this in this administration, a sort of friend of a friend of the administration by posting, he's now complaining that it's like, wait, you're not just disrupting the left-wing terror networks. All Pam Bondi is doing is say, well,

we're going to beef up hate speech laws against conservative specifically, and then like sue Office Depot. Maybe they'll get there. You know, they've already kind of like successfully canceled Jimmy Kimmel, which fuck you for making me care about Jimmy Kimmel or anything he does. But how embarrassing to have the, you know, the First Amendment broken over the back of these fucking redditors. Yeah. It also. it's because it's not just it's it's these reditors and they're made up world because like we whenever we talk to like when I think about when we talk to the QAA people we talk about Q&OM, we talk about the soup they all live in or we talked about like online conservatives and

Britain who live in a world where the government isn't doing something about something that's largely not happening like the government hasn't you know ushered the boogeyman out from under my bed I must stand four square against this is that when you find when those people finally take control they're not supposed to be in control all of the those fantasies, they're supposed to be animating impulses, so they'll be shock troops on behalf of the ruling class for basically free, right? They don't have to give them anything. You just have to keep them, like, angry and scared about problems that can never be solved. And they're never supposed to be in charge. That's kind of a dog catching the car. Yeah. Yeah, 100%. Well, I mean,

right, catching the dog catches the car, however, the car is being driven by dogs who are pursuing other cars driven by dogs. And all of them think that there's such a thing as like, If you watch the right video on Facebook, you can commune with, I don't know, the spirit of RFK or something like that. Like there's this, it's like a worldview based in conspiracy theory and like internet conspiracy conspiracy theory of a specific stripe. And it's showing up in such like prosaically shit British places as well. Like you can't like go over a mini roundabout or you can't go to the pub without someone who has cooked their brain on the internet trying to import. something American that you're supposed to care about. I'd also say this too, because I'm, you know, the resident old guy on the show is, you know,

obviously Jimmy Kimmel came to public prominence at least to some degree by being one of the co-hosts of the Man Show in the late, late, late 90s and early 2000s. And it's kind of funny to see that like at least some permutation of the worldview advanced by The Man Show has turned around and sort of metastasized into the thing that is now canceling and ending his career, presume, I mean, whatever. But it's just like, if you had the Man Show nowadays, would you, nowadays, is would you have to have the same guy who like connect an entire pint

in one go playing the piano singing songs about like, ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got Sissy, hip note on Discord.

Like, none of this shit would make any sense to the stuff that was in the 90, like the kind of talk radio conservative bullshit and the kind of like reaction, I want to say reactionary, but the kind of like reactive sort of anti-feminist 90s dude shit that that's what the man show was,

was kind of playing up to. Like it's gone so far in not that long a period of time. I mean, like, you know, I started high school in 1999. So it's just like seeing it now, you're like, this is completely unrecognizable to the point that probably the less boorish, but still one of the avatars of this kind of like American lad culture ishness, if you want to call it that, is now like the chief villain because of a really, really milktoast statement. And also apparently like a longstanding grudge by Trump, because wasn't Trump saying like we're going to fire Jimmy Kimmel back in like July? Oh, he's been wanting to do that forever. Yeah, the Trump enemies list, which is somehow less co. coherent than the Nixon one.

Yeah. Well, I think it's irresponsible for us not to consider that actually Jimmy Kimmel may have been a woke double agent the whole time and that actually Tyler Robinson or maybe even his mother in utero watched The Man Show that he was activated like a Manchurian candidate by the girls on trampolines. Like they jumped in a certain way such. Anyway, look, for the same reason. I like that the first stop that the online conservatives first stop is Starbucks in the

and to order a coffee in the name of Charlie Kirk. to make content out of it. Yeah, well, it's, it's like, I gotta, like, whack all my eyebrows at you and be like, are you triggered? Are you triggered? And it's, it's like, again, lapsing into, I mean, it was always weird, right?

But it's, it's like finding new arenas to try and trigger the left in. And I don't know, browse our selection of like anti-woke lagers here at the Charlie Kirk Arms is profoundly strange. I also think, too, that, like, Charlie Kirk's widow immediately pivoting to, like, you're making a video on TikTok with, like,

footage of his body like not obviously like morgue footage like he was dressed up like in a mortuary like you only saw his hands but it was his body and it's like doing that within like the first 48 hours is that i guess i'm not saying it's good or it's it's oh you know tolerable but i feel as though the pivot to immediate grifting by all means and any means necessary that's being there's no reason not to i mean like everyone involved is also doing that it's just weird to see it manifesting in Britain, I think, because, like, even if you want to talk about Charlie Kirk as some kind of, like, totem now for the right, like, Britain's got plenty of those. They've got the, you know, fucking Allison Pearson was yammering about like, oh, the lady who said, please burn migrant hostels down is a political prisoner. I was like, no, that's fucking against the law in Britain. Sorry. That's how the law works there. You know, it's like, that kind of shit, that's been going on forever. So, like, in a way, I mean, I don't want to be like the smug dumbass about it. But it's just so weird to see people in Britain trying to glom on to this because like, aside from a particularly online contingent or people who were like really golden retriever brained about stuff from the BBC. He hasn't really, he never really had that much purchase. I mean, remember the,

the stunning success of Turning Point UK. Like, you can be a right wing shit lord, but it's just different and it's so weird to me. Yeah, I mean, they put out a statement after he got assassinated and I would genuinely, my response was like, I forgot you guys existed. That was fair. I remember when you you launched like five years ago and then like nothing happened. after that it's like so many right wing causes in the UK

it's like like this is why again in the last episode I talked about understanding Starmer as like a sort of provincial Byzantine

governor turning himself into a human footstool for the emperor that's just like slurping up pasta in front of him Mm-hmm