TRASHFUTURE - Sustainability Serfdom: TF Live 3.12.2019 feat Rob Delaney

Episode Date: December 10, 2019

Please enjoy this live recording of Trasfuture live in London on December 3, 2019! It features Riley, Milo, Nate, returning champion Dr Eleanor Janega, and special guest Rob Delaney.  If you want access to our Patreon bonus episodes and powerful Discord server, sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/31753429 *Do some canvassing* Momentum (@peoplesmomentum) has a great resource that lets you sign up to canvassing events in marginal seats close to you. Access it here: https://www.mycampaignmap.com The only way we can win is by meeting voters face-to-face, so let's make it happen.

Hello Trash Features fans, just a quick heads-up. There's a bit of an audio splice at the beginning of this recording of our live show just because I, being a genius, didn't start record on time when Milo began the set. However, you'll notice a slight transition when it goes to the actual mixer audio and then it'll be normal from there on out. I should say that again. Very normal. Thank you again for listening. Hope you enjoy. Before to once more, under my writing desk, to inform you of the chattering classes of this one great nation. But yet again, we all have a clutter in their outrage.

Jeremy Corbyn and his cabal of Salonist ISIS sympathisers who have managed to convince the London Ramona Hordes that Boris Johnson, the Prime Minister himself, plans to sell the NHS to Donald Trump and US big business. Now we cannot move with the cries of their dismantling the NHS. Drug prices will skyrocket. But what evidence have these malice winter by Marley Scrooge? Sure, there were the minutes of an official government negotiation during which Conservative representatives called US officials that the NHS would be on the table.

But you can prove anything with official government documents. Why, here I've walked up UMG dossier, it was a government document. But the loony men's way to the left aren't so keen on power, are they? And since when are we coming through the minutes of each meeting anyway? I would say that if you took minutes at any normal person's dinner table, you could catch them in all sorts of unwise conversational gambits about the health benefits of blackface. There's nothing more than gaudy locker room pants on. Except at my dinner table, I always find alone.

And what does on the table even mean? All sorts of things have been in all kinds of topographical relationships to tables in history. And not all of them have been sold to the Americans. In many cultures, placing things on a table is actually a sign of reverence. As per usual, the group think Basque separatist loving Corbinistas are taking the British public for fools. Because how would you even go about selling the NHS to the Americans? Do they propose to dismantle Guy's Hospital for fellas and ship it?

And ship it brick by brick to Mar-a-Lago where it will serve as an ornate bowling alley? It doesn't make any sense. The shipping costs alone would be prohibitive. Let alone retrofitting the lanes and those little gutter barriers that pop up from the floor, which I always use. And even if they were to sell the NHS to the Americans, would that be so bad? What is wrong with the spirit of free market competition being allowed to improve our health care for a change? A truly competitive system would allow people to compare prices and find the best option for them. If the gonorrhea medication is too expensive at Pepsi-ROM for general,

Glasgow Royal Infirmary brought to you by Blackwater will welcome you as a new customer. Consumers who are unhappy with privatised health services can simply vote with their feet and move to a country with state-owned ones. Indeed, if the gender-neutral toilets for terrorists loving left love the NHS so much, why don't they set up their own competing NHS under the banner of a real or provisional NHS and let the public decide what they prefer? I'm sure if the millionaire champagne socialist Corbin and MacDonald sold their mansions and fleet of boats,

they could keep it going for a good few weeks. I say let's see them put their money where their mouth is. Dear reader, I put it to you that we must struggle against Corbin and his Khmer Rouge-loving trade unionist pals. And the bleak, uninspiring future they envisage, a future where drone-like comrades in grey overalls will provide endless, identical food to hungry children at school, carefully elderly mental health services to the homeless and, of course, the NHS. Else one day you will find yourself in a huge waiting room at the V.I. Lenin NHS Memorial Hospital waiting for your monthly injection of propaganda and you'll take a ticket from the machine

and you'll look down at your number and that number will be 1984. Please welcome the state's fresh future! I love what we've done with the bass for the song. I love that Nate is behind like an actual club, DJ Jack. Turning this into like a hip-hop comedy night where like every time we do a zinger he's just going to play like a hip-hop scratch or whatever. I want to request the air horn specifically. I want... Before we get any further, I just want to say to everyone here,

welcome all of you to the live show of Trash Future, the podcast about if we do not implement fully automated luxury gay space con and isn't a fissure, future isn't will be trash, I fucked it up again. But hello! How are you doing? I am joined, I am joined as ever by Milo Edwards to my left. Hello, I'm pleased to be here at this sensible center-left people for never-corban rally. Welcome. Wait, that's yours. Hang on. We're not doing beer communism yet.

We're also joined by Eleanor Yanniga, returning champion filling in for Alice. Eleanor. She's here to help us go medieval. It's true and very lame. We also have Nate on the boards who will join us up front once he's done on the boards. Doing something. Hello, hello everyone. Thank you. And, and, and, we are also joined by returning champion Rob Delaney. Good evening. Good evening friends. Star of stage, screen and Twitter advert.

Standing in for Chuck Ramona. Lib Dem is winning here. Speaking of the Lib Dems, ever since I heard the phrase skills wallet, I've had a dream and I would very much like for all of you to help me realize that dream. Are you ready to do that for me right now? When I say skills, you say wallet. Skills! Wallets!

Skills! Wallets! What do we want? Wallets! Oh, I got you. I got you all in my clever web. So, we, as usual, have prepared a whole bunch of news, reviews and things you could use for investment in startups today for you.

Because we all want to help our audience begin to make rentier returns against like trivial investments. We will consider our job done when each and every one of you is as rich as SoftBank. So, Nate, are you about done doing twisting knobs? Well, we'll find out if people's ears explode or not, but here's hoping. All right. So, we're going to play the startup game as we do with every live show. And my goodness, have I ever found a fun one? It is called Zoom and it's not spelled normal.

How many O's are we talking here? Not a single O. Oh, fuck you. Is it a U with a line over it? It's a normal U. It's American. It's Z-U-M-E. I'd like it on the basis of the name.

I rebuke it. Is it like an off-brand cheap copy of the Microsoft Zoom? Which we already know failed. I mean, I immediately hear failure when I hear that name already. Keep that thought in your mind. Not... Yeah, it's the Zoom listener. Yes, that's true.

Real heads, no. No, so it's Z-U-M-E. I, of course, have blanked out several of the lines of their purpose and vision statement. Don't worry. You won't be able to tell anything from it. Purpose. The purpose of Zoom. We're on a relentless quest.

Until I know it, though. They are not relenting on their quest. To create a smarter and more sustainable blank system. Eels wallet. Yup, yup, Rob got it. It's the Lib Dems, apparently. Although interestingly, I know I've said this before on the show, but I cannot emphasize it enough that the fight the collapse of civilization plan

of the Lib Dems is invest in startups. I know. I can't. It's not. I'm not trunking out. Not this early? On the startup tip, though, skills wallet is the worst thing I've heard since, I think, last week when Pete Buttigieg said he was going to strengthen paths for people.

He was going to strengthen paths to education, and that's just such fucking McKinsey brain rot. What he's doing is, look, most universities actually have dirt roads leading up to them, and by increasing tuition by only 70%, we can actually pave them. Strength and path is actually the gym bro offshoot of shining path. Look, I'm going to do the thing that I do in studio. You get to see it now where I drag us back on track. We're on a relentless quest to create a smarter and more sustainable blank system.

Political system. Am I right, folks? The Lib Dems again. Plumbing system. Oh, communication. Since that also means nothing. Ride share system. Okay.

Okay. Zoom. They're presupposing that there's not enough ways that we're torturing migrants by forcing them to drive us around town. No, absolutely. That's kind of like how I'm going. We're creating a smarter and more sustainable, impossible migration system. It's like Uber, but for climbing into the back of a truck.

I know girls. Okay. Vision. Vision. Here's the vision of Zoom. It's bad. Not good. It's bad.

Look, honestly, you give one US tech bro like 10 minutes, and they will figure out a way to extract monopoly rents from that shit. Vision. We will achieve our purpose, not a cult startup, by uniting the blank supply chain to the creation of a sustainability fabric. Wait. No. Oh, damn.

Sustainability fabric. Yeah. Unlike a normal fabric. This is a sustainability fabric. Yeah. And it's woven, not with mere cloth. No, no, no. It is woven using data.

You know, one of these sustainability fabrics that you make through data and things of that nature. Predictive analytics, of course. Look, I just want to point out one more fucking time how every STEM person should be forced at gunpoint to take at least one humanities class. Oh, yeah. Because that would, that would, all of this, I would just like, I'm just, I want a highlighter and I want to be like, unclear.

Also, since you're the medieval specialist, how wonderful would it be to take every tech bro and be like, snap your fingers and be like, you're a fucking blacksmith's apprentice in Transylvania in 1300 and you have scurvy fucking earn a living, you son of a bitch. Unfortunately, I think that's a lot of their kinks. So it's like, I'm not getting paid enough. I'm just imagining being hauled away by the cops for indecent exposure and just screaming, how can I be naked when my skin is covered in data? Look, also, every, everyone knows blacksmiths were the tech bros of the 1100.

I mean, it's true. It's true. I'm going to, yes, correct. Look, so the sustainability fabric, this one we've been talking about, you know, that meaningful thing. It's woven using data and predictive analytics. And it balances supply and demand. You know, like fabrics do, reducing waste, all while eliminating more carbon than is

produced. Okay. It's a Swiss army startup. It does everything. It's a fabric. It's data. It's analytics. It's a fabric that's...

It does not necessarily... I think we can fit the skills wallet in. We'll keep that in mind. So it's a data fabric that is balancing something about... Supply and demand. It also reduces waste and eliminates more carbon than is produced. All we need to do it is 300 million dollars that your father got from doing high speed trading that like tanked three African nations.

That's all we need. Oddly enough, Rob, the amount of money you just said, nowhere near. My little mind. They have so much more money than that for this mixed metaphor. Is this mixed metaphor just about like perhaps taking over five African nations? Oh, it is about so much less. The mox that just start up. No, it's...

This is the brilliant ingenuity of Silicon Valley that is able to do like a quantum measurable plank length amount with enough money to end a major social problem in a developed nation. All right, so I'm going to do one more guest down the panel and then I'm going to tell you what it is. What do you guess this thing is? Filling potholes. Something about money. I mean, Zoom makes me think something transportation related.

Rob is closest. I'm still thinking it's something delivery or rideshare related. Follow that. It's delivery, stroke, transportation. Have we ever covered anything similar to it before? Nate actually is on the money. Oh, is it the fucking pizza van? The van that bakes your pizza while it's going to you?

If you couldn't guess, this sustainability fabric that has more than the GDP of like a medium-sized country or at least the sector of a medium-sized country that's on a relentless quest, it's a pizza delivery van. Yeah. So what the fuck does sustainability have to do with it? That's a sustainable ass pizza. Oh, it's not. I was like, you know, I'm out here.

They're Jenner's taking each other to dinner on like flights, but I got to worry about my pizza now. No. Plus the Domino's Pizza Tracker is all the data blanket I need. Look, I go to bed every night. I sleep warm under the Domino's Pizza Tracker. Yeah, the Domino's Pizza Tracker isn't sophisticated enough for this because it would both be on delivery and prep at the same time.

Okay. You'd have to have a non-Euclidean Pizza Tracker. Oh, you poor fools. It's not just any pizza delivery van worth hundreds of millions of dollars that somehow is going to change the world. It uses robotics to make the pizza. Well, it's in transit to you. Oh, thank God for that.

I would hate it if anyone who was a human like got a wage. Like that's, it keeps me awake at night. I don't eat pizza that wasn't made by an Italian man in his fifties. I don't do it. It's tangential to this point, but I don't know if people are familiar with this story. There was a delivery service. I want to say is that a couple of American universities, it was like, they were robots using AI to deliver food.

You could order your food. It would bring it on a rope. What they didn't reveal until much later was actually they were drones being controlled by people in Columbia making a dollar an hour. And it's like, whoa, it's kind of AI in the personal touch. Don't worry. And that wasn't just pizza they were delivering. Here's the thing.

This, this company, don't worry. This company was absolutely not viable and was laughed out of existence. They've since shuttered their pizza delivery van concept with the exception of one lowly van that still drives around San Francisco. And that is where the story should end. It's like, that was like the one van they couldn't stop. Like, we'll just have to let that, that will keep, that will keep delivering pizza until the day it dies.

There's nothing that can be done. Basically this is like the Voyager space probe. If it made pizza whirling out there into eternity. Long after California is rendered completely uninhabitable by its own policies, this van will continue trawling the waste, offering, by the way, famously awful pizza to, you know, whatever tree stump happens to be left. No. Don't worry.

If you were concerned that the terrible robotic pizza delivery van that was going to change the world's startup went out of business, don't worry. It didn't. It received $375 million from SoftBank and now have a valuation, now have a valuation of $4 billion. One van. One van. It's a really good van.

If you, if you have a car and then like a Rube Goldberg device, you have the assets of a $4 billion tech company. Yo, you gave us your van and we heard that you like pizza and business ideas that make no sense. So. So. Now, $375 million, whatever they could, they could that have been invested in. Something specific and useful, I imagine.

This is a quote from the CEO of Mr. Alex Garden. There are a few more funny names. No, no. There's a really funny name in this one. Ron. There's Mark Krumpacker. Previous of the biscuit delivery van. And then there's a guy called Ron Storm.

Nice. That, that like is way on the nose for like, you know, 60s Swedish porn. So I'm kind of into that. That's fine. That's fine. So here's what Alex Garden mid-tier name said. We're going to be the Amazon of food. Isn't that just Amazon?

But wait, but we're going to be the Amazon of food. If all you wanted was very specifically pizza. Like it's just an endless show. I mean, if we consider that Amazon is mostly just a dildo factory, that's okay. Yeah. No. Story checks out. Story checks out.

Oh, you think only Amazon can have like wage slaves? No, no, no. Don't worry. We got that. We got that shit. Here's the thing. Mr. Garden, of course, before he invented the Amazon of food, that $4 billion value pizza delivery truck, that's just one truck.

He was the president of Zynga Studios and came up with Farmville. Oh. Both very good at providing notional food. So, okay. I've now done the normal thing I do when we have the startup segment. And I've got their about us section. And I want you, just when you think I've stumbled on the section where they use the economics 101 trope, just shout.

Here's the deal. They say, one third of the world's food goes to waste, which means all the water, energy, and greenhouse gases used to produce that food are wasted with it, making the food industry one of the biggest contributors to climate change. So, we took our one pizza van and have decided to take $4 billion that could be invested in doing something else into, you know, innovating. So, this is an issue, they say, with a $990 billion price tag, which I'm sure they've probably came up with pretty carefully.

They're trying to get that four. They're trying to raise it a little bit up. And it's an even bigger price tag for the planet. So, you know, it's good. They're thinking of the price for the planet. Like, what will we have to pay if, you know, civilization? Never mind. It's an insanely complex system, but we believe the solution is simple.

Give me money. Economics 101, supply and demand. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, God. So, I just want to point out, this is essentially Italian Elon Musk, but, like, turn into a business plan. They're like, I'm gonna shoot the calzone into space. Hey, disruptione, only not as good.

No, this is Italian Elon Musk. Those are my roots. Yeah, Italian American Elon Musk. So, this is a tall order, right? How's a robotic pizza delivery company that has one van to its name, but a four billion dollar valuation somehow, going to fight climate change through a data blanket? This is a future armor plot line, like, wow.

Look, to all you doubting Thomas as in Thomasine is in the audience. Actually, Zoom uses real-time food consumption data and predictive analytics to help food companies better predict demand, connect it with production, and try better resource decisions down the food supply chain. No, because you're saying food companies, but it's a van. It's one van. I've developed an amazing website called Will People Need to Eat Today, and it's just a massive page that just says yes.

You know, friends of the show, people, long-time listeners, will understand that we have the constant reference to a particular plot device in the classic video game Metal Gear Solid 2, in which a submarine gets used to route the entire internet, so that basically the submarine controls all information in the world. It's a plot device that only makes sense if you're into that kind of a thing. But this does kind of sound like they want the entire food industry to be routed through a pizza van in San Francisco.

In a way, Hideo Kojima wasn't that far off, was he? Wait, so the guy who runs this company has to wear a leather trench coat and skateboard everywhere, and regularly say things like, I'm in. So, here's the thing, after getting all of that money, they're not just one pizza van anymore. They're a pizza van and a website. I love the idea that they didn't have a website before. What's amazing about this though is that this is absurd to us,

but in 1999, this would have been worth $4 billion. Literally, if you think about dot-com boom stuff, you have a van, you have a website, you're in fucking business. You're like Henry Ford. It's all very Bay Area, but this is the other thing too, and what is really strictly important about it, they're going to disrupt everything, but the van is just in the Bay Area? It's just in the Bay Area, yeah.

Okay, all right, that's cool. I'm not sure that tech pros have realized that there are other places yet, and I'm kind of like, I'm hoping they don't. It's my major thing, but like, I don't know, I'm so tired all the time. We're just going to computerize every single bite of a crisp you take in the Bay Area. They're like tech flat earthers, like they don't believe in Australia. No. To be fair, I barely believe in Australia.

We call our product the sustainability fabric because it weaves all the pieces of the food system together. Absolutely fucking not. Creating a horrendous bacon and ice cream lattice. So apparently it's like a bacon ice cream lattice that mostly is just a truck, but that has a lot of ambitions, and we could use the money that they have to solve poverty or whatever, but let's hear them out.

Do you know how many homeless people there are in the Bay Area? I mean, look. They can deliver them all pizzas with this one weird trick. So here's the thing. In phase two, I think they become the food. You know, I feel comforted by that, so that's fine now. Okay, good. So here is, that is Zoom's explanation of what they do.

I went to press to see if I could find a plain English explanation of what it is that they do, and what they offer is bespoke mobile kitchens that double as food trucks and delivery vehicles. So food trucks. They've invented a burger van combined, combined with an AI system designed to better understand and respond to customer demand based on location, traffic patterns and similar. So what they've invested is a restaurant, but it's a restaurant you can never go to twice.

It's always different. It's a pre-socratic Greek philosophy restaurant. Can you truly step into the same restaurant twice? Zoom says no. Thank you to the 10 people who got that one. Making my degree feel worth it. So like, you know, if you want, let's say you're like, ah, I want to go to my favorite pasta restaurant.

It's down on Third Street. You're like, well, okay, it's a taqueria and it's on fifth now, but I'm sure it'll be fine. What if I told you the pasta restaurant is wherever you need it to be? Maybe the pasta restaurant was inside us all along. Damn. What's inside us is going to be in the pasta restaurant served to the last people who can afford to eat it.

Well, that's the homeless people stage. Yeah, I got it, got it. Oh man, this is such an evil company, mostly because it's stupid. So basically this company, which by the way is one food truck that leases other food trucks to credulous morons, has three divisions somehow. Zoom Source creates smarter and more sustainable methods

for how food is grown, produced, and delivered. If you want an example of what $4 billion gets you, can you do a quick guess for me? What has Zoom Source accomplished? No. Nothing. No. Less than nothing, I promise.

They got someone fired. One of their vans has like weed growing on the top. They found a farm on a map and wrote farm under it. They just need to take a couple of years to kind of like really find themselves. Eleanor is closest. Here is the quote from the CEO about why there are a $4 billion company

based on this division. We did some internet searches for two weeks. Hell yeah. Trying to find packaging companies that made different pizza boxes. So they're really sticking to their wheelhouse here. Oh, fucking hell. This is like the ferry company all over again.

And we found there really wasn't much variety out there. We tried doing nothing and it didn't work. We're all out of ideas. They're almost all made by a small select group of companies who just repeat the same ideas for pizza boxes. Do they now? Do they fucking now? Are you tired of the same boring old pizza boxes?

Holy shit. I want like one of those only seen on TV commercials and it's like someone's like fiddling with the pizza box and they're like, oh, it's on the fucking flight. Like the pizza's on the ceiling. Shot camera. This is just Joe Rogan for startups. Like dude, pizza is round,

but for years we've been putting it in a square box. That was their idea. No. That was their idea. No. No. No. Sorry.

Mecca's that way, right? Fucking hell. I'm doing this for now. I'm just so holy. I'm going to say cost of single payer United States. How much would this be? It'd be very cheap. We had one hospital.

We put it in a van. Yeah. This would be about 10%. What would it cost to make single payer health care for the states? Instead we're like, what if pizza boxes were round? You tired of handling all that extra cardboard. We're going to save the climate by making pizza boxes round. Four billion dollars, please.

It literally sounds like a guy with a pizza van met a guy who used to work at Farmville and they're like, soft bank will fucking buy this one way or the other. And it's like they're so full up sloshing with golf oil money, like we got to spend this on something. It's like a pizza van that's going to give us the future. All right. Do it.

Also like, dude, just smoke like a bit less weed. Have they not even done the most basic research into pizza boxes? I mean, clearly they haven't, right? There's a reason why the box is because it's fucking hard to make a round box like it's cost prohibitive to make a round disposable box. No, I'm pretty sure this company that loses 50 million dollars a year is worth four billion because it has one van in some Google searches. It's figured out how to do it cheaper.

You know how hard it is to store round things. They don't tessellate. Alex garden goes on. So I said, wow, that's really weird. I bet he's fucking dead. Okay. Well, yeah, that's just really weird. Let's just as a startup, like we're a startup.

I'm reading the quote here. No one can tell us what the rules are. Sir, are you a four year old? Like I, why don't we just get a whiteboard and draw what a cool pizza box would be? Oh, it's the Homer. It's the Homer, but for pizza boxes. Except the Homer has a sort of kind of like retro charm.

So I've got go fast. I have a couple more things before I move on to some of the news. They have another division called zoom forward, which when Mark Crumpacker left was moved with zoom culinary. All of their executives are leaving rapidly zoom forward. Grow your business by moving food closer to where customers want it. Oh, it's delivery. It's not delivery.

It's to Lyceo for the Canadians. Disruption. Hey, demand for food. Demand for food varies by time of day and trade area. Amazing. I know three times when it's really hot. Oh, Rob, they go into that. There aren't many traditional brick and mortar locations

that offer the perfect mix of breakfast, lunch and dinner. It's cold McDonald's. They just invented a diner. Have they never? What is what a slap in the face to like one of the only good things America has come up with the diner like out Jesus. It's it's have. Have they been just where they born a year ago and raised on

nothing but fuel? Are they not a like? Oh my God, there could be three meals distinct from one another in the type of food that we put in them. I'm sure that everyone who works there who I'm sure they're all named chat and they all had like just some kind of like nanny that sort of threw food at them. So like the concept of meals probably not so much.

They have like only been to weather spoons. So using a mobile kitchen that can change location based on predictive analytics is a breakthrough in restaurant development. What about just delivery? Why do you have to move the restaurant? I thought it was Mohammed didn't move the mountain. This is becoming increasingly emotional for me and like I don't know.

The thing is, Riley, you're thinking inside the box and the box you're thinking inside is square. However, to support zoom forward this thing where they've decided they want to make every restaurant into a car. You know, every restaurant must be mobile. It must go to where you want. No one should go to a restaurant. Well, this is just making me think of is the Chris Morris bit

about the pedophile dressed up as a school. So to support this, they also have invested tens of millions of dollars in new battery technology. They're like, well, obviously if we want to make restaurants perfectly mobile and completely automated, we'll need to invent a new type of battery, of course. More billions, please. On an unrelated note, we really needed regime change in Bolivia.

I'm not like, oh, oh, we get to that later. We actually do in the notes. Nicholas Majura was refusing our groundbreaking round box technology. So zoom culinary ensures that quality never suffers by elevating hospitality through the delivery experience. Here's what this actually is. All they've ever done ever other than their one food truck that

they own themselves is they leased 30 to a company called And Pizza in Washington, DC. And they've said this opens up the opportunity for the company to try out new neighborhoods and check the demand for different products for $4 billion. Amazing. No, no, I got nothing. I'm just so angry.

I don't understand. Why are they spending the money on? You know, just paper, paper clips. They're just like Wall Street in their office the whole time. They're like throwing dwarves at a target like fucking. I mean, they're clearly doing mountains of cocaine. Allegedly. My favorite movie is Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol.

I watch it at least once a month. And at the end, they avert a nuclear attack on San Francisco. And you're happy. But I'm now realizing it would be an even better movie if the bomb just struck and fucking incinerated that shit hole. Look, here's the thing. Rob, I'm about to approve you wrong because they've got two moon shots.

They're going to change the world and Eleanor is uniquely well positioned to comment on one of them as a medievalist. Look at me now, mom. You said I'd never use this in my job. Just one of them actually involves shooting the moon because that's actually cool. The first is the zoom gigafarm. Oh, wait, no.

See, here it is, y'all. It's luxury automated freaking feudalism, isn't it? No. Hell, yes. No. The zoom gigafarm. No. The zoom gigafarm.

Is it using the three field system? Well, it's an agricultural platform is what it is. You know what that is? A fucking field. Yeah, but Milo. These hoes are going to try to resell me the heavy plow, which was a major development in the 14th century, which led to the opening up of fields in Northern Europe, which had heavier

clay-based soils. But they're going to try to disrupt this app. They're going to try to disrupt me. I'm not having it. I'm going to scoop all the asses. My man bringing the heavy plow. The zoom. The zoom.

It insults all of my peasant ancestors. The zoom gigafarm is, of course, an agricultural platform that supports growers with fixed rate leases for both land and utilities. Holy shit. It's sharecropping. Oh, my God. No.

No. We have been through this. Is there a way they could get workers for it through some sort of like auction system? What if it's just like if you're too loud? No, no. It's better than that because, you know, if they're just born there, they'll be tied to the land and they'll have to, you

know, ask permission to move down the road. It's fine. I'm talking about serfdom. Yeah. That's a serfdom. Serfdom is another way of being unfree. You're not owned as chattel, but you're not free. Yeah.

So it's like pre-slavery. You're a serf. You're a serf, but there's no E. You're a serf. It's like a serf with a U, but, you know, because it's northern California. So it's serve S U with an umlaut RFP. I've got some articles to get to.

So I want to break through the other moonshot here. But by the way, the gigafarm actually will generate water, energy, and nutrients for growers with zero net zero environmental impact. So like the three field system. Yeah. It's cool. They've done that, but they're doing it.

You know, put people in debt bondage. Yeah. We've invented this carbon neutral harvesting tool called the size. And also, of course, they have prep on the way prep on the way will collect produce from the zoom gigafarm, obviously, and other farms as well. So just in case you were worried and process it during idle

driving time to connect growers directly to sales channels, thereby reducing labor cost and eliminating additional processing and distributions. So are you saying the pizza van is going to be a thresher? What I'm saying is the pizza van is going to replace every single step of food processing from planting to consumption. Love is a full science project. This is this is something a nine year old wrote down when they

were just no one told them to stop writing. I mean, I think that that is kind of a lot of what's going on in Silicon Valley. Is that like, again, a chat, you know, one of several chats. I wrote something down at like nine or 10. And since no one was there to tell them, honey, it's not going to work out. They just like eventually like brought it to a bank and said,

can I have money? And everyone said yes. Yeah. And they were like, yeah. They were like, no, no, this is hard bank. You need to go down there. And so with that, I think I'm in fact ready to move on to the single most trash future telegraph article I have ever read in

the history of doing this podcast. It is entitled. Now the title does not give away why it's the most trash future article I've ever read. The byline for the author does. The title is quite what you'd expect from the telegraph, something that I've written in the last week. It's make no mistake.

Our beloved NHS will never be on the table in a trade deal with the USA. Bye. Cool. Cool story. Matt Hancock and Liz Truss. Yeah. It's by both of them.

They worked together to write an article of 400 words. Both of the major points of which are proven easily, quickly and totally wrong with the first result on Google. That is and that is 34 words more than they collectively know. So they've been on the source dot com. I mean y'all ever wonder what it'd be like with Matt Hancock and Liz Truss. The NHS.

They begin. Is the nation's proudest and most beloved institution for more. That's true than 70 years. It has been there for all of us to the highs and lows cradle to grave. We all have a personal connection in some way. This is a classic example of when they could have just stopped at the first paragraph. Is a classic like when they when the spectator does like the sarcastic

first paragraph like oh racism is bad. Here's why it isn't. As we prepare to leave the European Union we are working hard to build an independent trade policy that allows our economy to flourish, creating new jobs and setting up Britain for a prosperous future after Brexit which is the second paragraph you really want to see in an article about the NHS. So as we begin to negotiate trade deals throughout the world with

Australia, Japan, New Zealand and they kind of sneak this last one in there. The U.S. Very very good countries. Excellent countries. Everyone agrees actually. Okay. Very luxurious hospitals.

So a lot of the nurses were on Melrose Place in the 1990s. We want to make one thing absolutely clear. The NHS will never under any circumstances be on the table in any future trade talks. Rally editorializing except in the ways they describe in the following paragraphs. The price the NHS pays for drugs won't be on the table. Not in a way that ever makes them lower in a way that will never make

them higher. And the services the NHS delivers won't be on the table. All the ones we haven't already sold to private interest. So someone should have probably told Dominic Raab earlier today when he said that it would though. Oh, damn. It's like one of them only ever tells the truth and one of them only ever lies.

My main theory is that Matt Hancock only ever tells the truth, but he's trying to lie. He really liked to. He just can't. He can't quite wrap his head around the concept. He's like, okay, if I say the thing that's happening, if I say it reflects reality, of course it has to reflect reality. If I make a face later, maybe they won't believe me.

That's how I'm going to lie. Matt Hancock learning to lies like Borat learning to tell jokes in the film. We're going to privatize the NHS. Not. Labour. Labour's attempt to spread lies about the NHS using all of those documents that they found to distract from their confused message on

Brexit is shameful. How dare Labour spread lies about me by publishing the things which I wrote in private. Fucking incredible. A very confused message that anyone can sum up in about eight seconds. It's, you know, it's a lot. To be fair, it's very hard for Dominic Robb to understand. So, you know, they only went to Oxbridge, all of these people,

literally every single one of these people. Look, in today's rush, rush world with its robotic pizza delivery vans who has eight seconds to understand Labour's Brexit policy. Exactly. All I know is Dominic Robb is a second-degree black belt in Karate and nothing has ever made more sense to me. Dom is for dominant. Okay.

They're tactic of scaring the most vulnerable people in the UK by saying what we're going to do. More than by deporting them. In order to score political points is proof that Jeremy Corbyn is not fit to govern this country. How dare you say something uncomfortable? So, look, look, look, that's just the intro to this article. They have two proof points that are ironclad that show that

all of this selling the NHS malarkey is just malarkey. Joe Biden wouldn't have it. First proof point. Proof point number one, ironclad. Conservative Health Minister Henry Willink. Oh, well then. Was the first who declared that the NHS should be free at the point of delivery according to need and not the ability to pay.

And 75 years on, the Conservative Party are as committed to that principle as ever. Now, from the panel, this was from a pre-NHS, a pre-Bevon white paper about the health service in the country. Who would like to guess what happened next? I'm going to guess that he said that and then voted no when the creation of the NHS was proposed. Yes, that's correct.

I was really hoping it was going to be my one, which was the next paragraph was, which is why I think we really need to make a deal with Herr Hitler. I just kind of thought it was like one of those classic Tory things where it's like, and that's why it's bad. You know, like if the poor continue to live, why, you know, whomst will we drive over in our automobiles? Look, they need to keep living.

They have to justify the $4 billion valuation for Zoom somehow. Someone has to tend those crops. No, no, of course. So, you know, when Nye Bevan actually introduced the bill to create the NHS in 1946, Henry Willink not only voted against his creation, but tried to introduce a hostile amendment that would have means tested it.

Oh my God, it was an early incarnation of Joe Swinson. I mean, like, you know, I'm not saying this is a historian, but I think he might have also hated squirrels. Is that, am I? Look, a sickness wallet. Look, here's the thing, and it's not libelous for me to say that it would be very difficult for Joe Swinson to guarantee

that in the course of all of her life on Earth, she has never either killed or contributed to the killing of a squirrel. And so what I'm saying is I'm casting doubt on her assertion that she's never killed a squirrel, and now doubts are mounting on her assertion that she doesn't kill squirrels. People are saying that Joe Swinton may have killed a squirrel.

I just heard it. Yes. Listen. Let he who is without sin fire the first stone, okay? Can I say quickly, I killed a squirrel once. Boo! I just... You should hear from a squirrel killer.

I did. I euthanized a squirrel one. It had been hurt and was dying, and I was on my way to dinner in New York City years ago. All right, me do a real one. And I said, you know, if you're still there, after I've had my fucking wontons, I'm going to kill you. And I came back and I tried to help him and get him going,

and he was just like... and coughing up blood, and I fucking killed him. So this... Hard as a motherfucker. So interestingly, Rob actually was reading from the text of an article John Rental will write to defend Joe Swinton. Yeah, yeah. I read it through my Zoom retinal insert.

Oh, yeah, sorry. In the time since this podcast started, Zoom got into another business. They're inside my body. There was $10 billion now. So back to the article. Right, their first proof point. It fell apart under, you know,

the considerable scrutiny of 10 seconds of Googling, which is about as much as Zoom did to invent a circular pizza box, and that's worth $4 billion. So like, where's our valuation? Here's the second proof point. As the recent Orkambi negotiations have shown, we will never be held to ransom by pharmaceutical companies.

Pip, pip. I have done another 10 seconds of Googling to prove this completely horse shit. They say, so they say, patients will always be put first, and the NHS will continue to have the freedom to negotiate discounted deals for new treatments that are affordable and fair to,

and here's the turn. All parties. Want someone think of the multinational pharmaceutical companies? Come on, you have to feed GlaxoSmith and Klein? How will Zeneca get to Astra? I mean, the weird thing to me is they're giving themselves cover. You know, I mean, in 2019, it's okay to lie virulently and publicly

and insane and extravagantly, but this is sort of like a toddler lie because they're saying we're not going to sell the NHS, and what they mean is we're not going to sell it all at once. So they can really comfortably sell this lie, and they're doing, I think, a good job of convincing themselves, but hopefully not the electorate. Yeah, I mean, I think that what it's couched into,

like it's the specific sort of like nationalistic appeal to it's like, oh well, you know, we're just so great, but everyone is just going to inherently wish to give us a better deal, and it's like, honey, have you met America? I would also say as a staunch labor supporter that labor a little bit too is being like, they are going to put it in a box and sell it to them in one fell swoop. They're doing that a little bit too,

and I think maybe they could afford to say something like, in fact, just look five years into history or ten years into history and you see how much they've sold and to whom because it's pretty easy to chart. Well, it's because there are people who will be like, why would America want to take over some like, you know, GP service in the middle of like, you know, Wiltshire or whatever that serves ten people,

and it's like, oh, brick by brick tomorrow, I'll go and turn into a luxury bowling alley. We've been over this. There's this weird ass thing in Dearborn just outside of Detroit where Ford collected a bunch of buildings brick by brick from England. So he's got like, what? Yeah, no, I'm serious. Yeah, it's called like a Dearborn Village or something.

It's on the Ford property and he bought all these buildings here. He bought like a Cotswold cottage and he bought like all these and he bought like a weird clock tower from like in the city in London and he re-established them all there and also like the Wright Brothers Bicycle Shop. I think he heard that Heinrich Himmler had taken a shit there once. Yeah, exactly. But it's like, but this is the thing is it's like, when we say we're going to just open up these markets again to Americans,

it's like this is what Americans are looking for. They're like, yeah, I'm hoping to get that like I'm going to brick by brick by like a Cotswold cottage. And they'll be like, here's my wheelchair NHS. Well, no, what they want, they don't want the NHS. They want access to a market of 65 million English people, 5 million Scottish people and however many fucking people live in Wales and Northern Ireland. No one knows. This and this is why Matt Hancock and Liz Truss are fully in character as Matt Hancock and Liz Truss

because they've chosen the examples that undermine their point most. So they've said, but the Orcambia Fair obviously shows that the NHS is not for sale. What's Orcambia? I hear you asking mentally. And Orcambia is a cystic fibrosis drug that the NHS has been fighting to get into the country for about three years. But Vertex Pharmaceuticals, I kind of like that name is like Vertex, the American company. It's quite evil sounding, isn't it? It sounds like a Robocop. Like James Bond has tried to like do something vis-à-vis Vertex Pharmaceuticals.

They are a front for some kind of nuclear submarine. The American company that owns the patent wants to charge 104,000 pounds per patient per year. Now there is an Argentinian generic version that costs like 80% less. Like way, way, way less. And yet the UK has refused to deploy its mechanisms to fight like patent monopolies to get the affordable Argentine medicine in. And they just refuse to do it. I wonder what that is.

All the Argentines want it for these little islands. And so if their deal with the US is we're going to remove barriers to entry into the market such as our ability to take away a patent from you. The example they've cited is don't worry. We're going to make sure they profit from basically stealing the NHS. I mean, too long of the fat cat cystic fibrosis sufferers lauded it over the American pharmaceutical companies. You know, those people have got money to burn.

Well, and they still rarely live past the age of 20. You really got to squeeze them. They don't need that pension. What do they get? They might as well spend it on the drugs. I mean, it's parody. We're recording this. It is.

It is to me psychotic that they had an entire world of evidence at their disposal that they could have cherry picked. And yet Matt Hancock and Liz Truss have proven to me today that they are secret accelerationists. They were like, no, no, don't worry. We're going to pick the evidence like, no, it's going to be really bad. And don't worry. Don't trust us. I want to read the original Liz Truss only draft of this article where it's like,

Britain imports two thirds of its drugs. That is a disgrace. We have so many willow trees we could be licking like our ancestors used to. In China, they use pork to treat injuries. So they say a new US free trade agreement could break down barriers to trade, create more opportunity and prompt growth and prosperity across the country, which will then of course continue to fund the NHS. The opportunity meet is a reading 3.6 run.

But the real the real levels may be far higher. I don't know about you, but anytime I think about prosperity and health care, I think about America. I was just going to say that you read that passage and all three of the Americans on stage just look down like, oh, fuck. Oh, yeah. By the way, why do the British need like an 80% American panel of people to tell you that you're being fucked over by your politics? We came here for health care, fuck's sake. I'm like, don't fuck this up for me.

Health tourism, vote conservative. Okay, my glasses are fogging the fuck up. All these people pay so many more taxes than I do. It's getting steamy up here. Again, you're all so lost without the notes. What would you do with it? One more time. It's just the concept of the Matt Hancock and Liz Trust threesome is just she can't take it anymore.

Wipe them glasses down really. Take a minute. But here's the thing. Take a moment. The third is opportunity. Did you know all this stuff that we've been talking about, you know, about the sale purchase and sale of the NHS by people who just want to make your wife worse because they suck? Apparently, it's all just a bunch of malarkey, as Joe Biden would say, because the leak of the papers actually raises the specter of foreign influence among certain people. Thank God for that.

There is a specter haunting Europe indeed. It is the specter of Russia. The specter of just like caricature Slavic person. We're coming for you at any moment. Oh, yeah, no, absolutely. The way the Labour Party actually received these documents, and this is not far off from what is now being reported in the mainstream British press, is a guy in a tall fur hat did a low kick dance into Labour's HQ. People are like Tom Watson's back already. He's finished the level two gym instructor qualification.

Now he's learned Cossack dancing. But he's jacked. Yeah, yeah, he's Tom Crossfit. Damn. No, so legitimately, the headlines today say that it mirrors Russian methods. And when you drill down into what they mean by this, and like the third or fourth paragraph, it's, well, Russia put documents online, and so did these people. And that's it. Have you ever built-

I'm loading a document. In much way. In many ways, the way that I teach my classes at universities also mirrors Russian tactics like that, too. You never know where you may find my syllabus, so watch out. Russian tactics are like, get so drunk you invade a country and then forget enough to pretend you didn't. As far as I lived there for three years, that's the best I can do. So apparently the leak and distribution have classified you. How bad must internal Tory polling be?

By the way, they're like, well, that thing, it's Russia, obviously. The leak and distribution of classified British U.S. trade documents online resembles a disinformation campaign that originated in Russia, according to experts who say it could signal foreign interference in Britain's election. Except in this sense, it's just an information campaign. This is just the Russians doing freedom of information. Yeah, I mean, don't get me wrong, there's a million things that we can all say about the Russians, but none of this is incorrect so far. It's right, but I've actually gone to, again, because I do this for all of you people, I expose myself to this kind of information. I mean, he means literally, he's taking off his clothes in front of it. I flash the computer.

It's the only thing that works anymore. I flash the computer and I'm like, take this bad article. The Russians want a robust progressive left-wing government in the UK because what they're really scared of is Matt Hancock. Because you may have noticed all those people that the Russians murder in Britain Hall, the Tories have really gone after them. They're fucking shitting it over Moscow. So a report by Ben Nimmo, the director of investigations. Finding Nimmo. We've found him finally.

Well, I mean, look, that's probably going to be the episode title. One man just left like, you will never find me. Director of investigations at Graphica, a social media research company. So network analysis company said that the leaked documents that arrived online were amplified in a way that closely resembles the known Russian information operation called secondary infection. And if you weren't scared enough, infection is spelled with a K. That's how you know. And the I was like backwards and shit. So you know.

It's going to be like one of those things where they tried to spell it out so that we could read it with a Cyrillic alphabet. And every time I see it, I try to read it in Russian and then just get deeply confused for five minutes. They're like, they just think that you can use like yas. Yeah, absolutely. I got a lot of deeply Slavic based complaints about all of you people. So form a line afterwards. I'm going to insult you all personally to your face. So here's the thing.

The people who uncovered this were researchers at Britain's Oxford and Cardiff universities. The amalgamated university. Ox diff, they call it. And a think tank called the Atlantic Council. Oh, what evil bloodsucking monster are they funded by? Let's find out, shall we? The Atlantic Council think tank. Why they sound downright normal.

They sound like they're like run by some kind of squid in the middle somewhere. It's like. It's a trope. The Atlantic Council, the Atlantic Council, this is from their website, promotes constructive leadership and engagement in international affairs. Based on the Atlantic community's central role in meeting global challenges. Why fucking the Faroe Islands? I mean, this sounds disturbingly like the early slave trade, but go on.

It's fine. The council provides an essential forum for navigating the dramatic economic and political changes defining the 21st century by informing and galvanizing its uniquely influential network of global leaders. Is this the pizza van? But it's doing it. It's the pizza gate. It's the pizza gate. It's the pizza gate.

No, it's so basically it's yeah, we're like not the CIA. We're just like, we're any other thing. We're tons of other stuff. We're a startup for a vibe. We're an idea. CIA. Come on. Those guys are over there.

The Blackwater naming convention. No war crimes here incorporated. Just a chill bunch of guys who want to make sure that people have access to selling drugs for higher prices in the UK. You know, maybe we get pizza sometimes. It's chill. Five guys or less. It's not sus. Through the papers we write, the ideas we generate, and the communities we build, the council shapes policy choices and strategies

to create a more insecure and prosperous world. No one who has ideas says they're generated. The CIA has never said anything like this. But because I never stop asking questions when I'm presented with some transparent marketing horse shit. That's an Oxford education right there. You'll never get a four billion endowment with that attitude, sir. I have actually taken some of the titles of the Atlantic Council's blog posts, which are illuminating as to its priorities. I'm going to start with the first one, and this is the mildest.

So this is the ranch wings of the Atlantic Council blog post selection. Norway's PM explains how NATO will help combat climate change. Hell yeah, we're going to nuke climate change. I love it. The F-35 is going to fucking shoot the greenhouse. We're going to do a regime change, but in the sky. We're going to regime change the sun. Damn, God is dead, and we have killed him truly.

But that's just, that's the gentlest one. The second one, I've ramped it up all the way to medium spicy. Protests challenge Iran's future position in Iraq. What? Wow. Well, obviously, like, look, Iraq's only going bad because Iran's occupying it. They're evil, remember? We're the Atlantic Council.

The NHS document, by the way, that's classic disinformation. Don't believe it. I don't think he understands how geography works. This seems distressingly not Atlantic. But I mean, does he think that Iran is like Lesothun? It's like inside Iraq. Look, NATO people think Iran's everywhere. Okay, here is medium to spicy.

Juan Guaidó's operation freedom gives Venezuela a shot at democracy. Because when they voted for the other guy, it wasn't democracy. Like Juan Guaidó's a shot at democracy sounds distressingly like an early kind of like 2000s VH1. Teela Tequila shot at love. Juan Guaidó's shot at democracy. And then there's a Serbian war criminal, a shot of poison. Remember that guy, yeah.

Oscar's video, the ones we lost. Weirdly enough. I feel like he's from this Oscar's video. So here's the last, the spiciest one. I didn't go by rule of threes here because I wanted to do four. What's this meatball level? Is that what we're calling it? This one is quite...

I'm going to get in there and call it that. This one is an extremely spicy meatball. If you were alive in the US in 2000, in the year 2000, hold on to something. I'm just going to duck and cover. It's all I know. Blog post entitled, the 10% margin, understanding Bolivia's contested presidential election. It opens with the line, imagine if a US presidential candidate can win the presidency with only 40% of the popular vote. Fuck you.

Fuck you. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. That was the first election I could vote in. I turned 18. I immediately left the country. The thing where... Fuck you.

No, I'm still mad. The people who are saying, honestly, those documents saying that the Tories are going to do what they've always been doing once they accomplish the thing that they want to accomplish, to do the thing they want to do, which is sell off all the stuff to the Americans so we can become an Atlantis country. Don't worry. They're not going to do that. That's Russian disinformation. Don't worry. You can trust us.

The people who are like, democracy, that only happens when they count the most votes. Come on. There are all kinds of ways that can be wrong. Bolivia, the elected president? No. Come on. We have a bunch of like crazy new math we invented that says he's not really elected. So what I'm saying is...

The ability in Bolivia is very important because how else are they going to come up with these kind of ideas without that much cocaine? So we're going to conclude on this. Mr. Nemo's report states, the most urgent question is, how did these leaked documents, apparently genuine, come to be disseminated online? What appears to be an information operation six weeks before the election? How did it happen? How did labor come into possession of them? How did the telegraph come into possession of them six months ago and then just do nothing with them? I heard that shit was on Reddit, but like not one of the porn ones.

So who was paying attention is in our relationships. That was the thing, right? That was the thing, right? On the telegraph, they didn't reveal any of the text of the document, but they reported it onto like US, Britain trade talks, nothing spicy happening here. US and Britain trade talks going well. Anyway, how did they come into contact with these documents? Oh, I don't know because the Tories are all dumb as shit and everyone who works for them hates them. Like it's pretty easy to imagine a scenario without like Vladimir Putin dressing up in a ninja costume and like stealing them from underneath the sleeping mat Hancock's folder.

Like, I mean, like literally like most of the Tory cabinet would lose their own penis if it wasn't screwed on. I have it on good authority that several of them pay good money for that too. So it's just like, oh yeah. Listen, they got a massage from an ugly woman who was very old. They kept the pants on. That's Dershowitz. It's a different country. Same group of people.

So to conclude the legal disclaimer. Atlantic group. All we know, all we know at this point, we can say for sure. And again, we know this because Tory internal polling must be in the single digits. That the Russian playbook is never for or against anything. It's about sowing confusion and destroying the field of political trust. But fortunately- Know how I got these post-Soviet republics?

But fortunately, there's a startup that actually has a trust fabric. Trust fabric kind of sounds a little bit like they're kind of like trying to advertise panty liners or something. The trust fabric is like the brotherhood of nations that bonds Belarus and Russia. So, so, noting that we are now considerably over our recording time. I am going to say, can't leave yet, but I'm going to say a few things. I'm going to say, first of all, thank you all very much for coming to Trashfuture Live recording featuring Rob Delaney and Eleanor Yodiga. You're all beautiful. I love each and every one of you.

And now comes the bit where I say the other stuff that I've been saying at the end of every episode of these last six weeks. Sondra, please bring the kids back. We can talk this out. It's Russian misinformation. Sondra, the Liberal Democrats and Conservatives have so much money from like three guys. None of whom are Russian, though. Don't worry about that. Don't worry. They're all classic British billionaires who live in Gibraltar. And literally all we have, when this comes out, it will be three days to the election.

You're all hearing it now, some days before that. There will be ups and downs and polls and us saying to not believe them or believe them or whatever. Do the one that we say, but we'll tell you. But literally all we have is people. So keep knocking on doors, again, not just randomly, like be with a CLP. Don't just do ding-tongue-dash. Be like, ha, full labor. No, you do have to be organized.

But like you in the audience and you listening at home, you must do this. Or else Britain could become more like America, which come on, please. Don't make me move again. And it's fun too. Canvassing and door knocking and phone banking and stuff is like really fun. The first time you do it, you're like terrified. But then you do it and it's incredible fun and you might even get laid. You might meet somebody.

So you just... That's fucking haram. None of that. No, no, no. Come on. I thought the telegraph said we're gonna do Sharia. I'm just saying there's a selfish element to it. Yes, you'll be helping future generations, but you'll also enjoy yourself.

Also, again, we're here in like, you know, extremely like the independent Republic of London, but if you've got time and you can go anywhere else, if you have a look on labor websites and you can look at marginal seats there. Please go to Bedford. Yeah, at least seriously. We have a row too. They need some help up there, seriously. Yeah, there are a lot of places.

And don't just go... There's tons of people in Oxford. There's other places to go. If you could just like look at where targeted seats are, then maybe we won't all die in a fiery holocaust without penicillin. I don't know. Yeah, please, come on, please. Help.

Look. Help. We all know we're voting labor. We're campaigning labor. What's gonna happen on December 13th? Lib Dems winning hand. Come on. Skills wallets.

If the audience can tell me, please, what will happen on December 13th, it would be so gratifying when I point the microphone at you. Exactly. An incoherent, bad-like noise. It's gonna be an indeterminate noise because I'm gonna be screaming, my boy JC, do it though.

And that's the thing, do it though. Oh, yeah, and it's gonna be great. That noise you just made, all of the op-ed columnists at the Observer are gonna be making exactly that noise on the 13th. Pitch it down a few octaves. Because you're waiting it, you're gonna be in Julia Hartley Brewer's mentions.

And you're gonna be typing, Julia Hartley, poor. I'm planning to spend the entire day just going to various Tories things and asking them how it feels to be publicly owned on Twitter, so join me. Before we let you all go, this is also mostly for the recording.

Eller, you've got a comic book coming out. I do. On pre-order now. Yeah, on Icon Press. Pre-order it now from hopefully your local bookstore. Don't be a fucking narc. But Middle Ages, a graphic history. Don't get you some. Don't get it from Amazon,

the zoom of product ordering. No, no. The publishers are actually printing it in a van as it is delivered to you. And Rob, you also have a comedy show coming up. Yeah, I have a special coming out next month. It's called Jackie. Nice.

With all of those plugs done, I'm now gonna do what I normally do in the studio and say thank you all so much for coming out again. You've all been wonderful. This has been Trash Future. Have a good evening. Thank you.