TRASHFUTURE - TF Presents: An Algorithmically Generated Christmas feat. Alice Caldwell-Kelly

Episode Date: December 4, 2018

On this week’s Trashfuture, Riley (@raaleh), Milo, Hussein (@HKesvani), and Nate (@inthesedeserts) spoke with writer Alice Caldwell-Kelly (@AliceAvizandum ) about a banner week in brain-dissolution, which included a viewing of a very popular Unicorn Poopsie Surprise unboxing video -- a toy designed by algorithms and popular with children who want to make their own unboxing videos. Also covered: Uber but for unlicensed ambulances, disingenuous Tory ‘outrage’ about a viral video showing the schoolyard abuse of a Syrian refugee boy, and a special visit from Brendan O’Neill to summarise the hypocrisy of the SJWs regarding the inhabitants of North Sentinel Island. Here’s the horrible unboxing video, in which adults dress up and act like children who are dressing up and acting like adults: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80rugwkSSig Please bear in mind that your favourite moron lads have a Patreon now. You too can support us here: https://www.patreon.com/trashfuture/overview Also: you can commodify your dissent with a t-shirt from http://www.lilcomrade.com/, and what’s more, it’s mandatory if you want to be taken seriously.

Yo, so this is fucked up, but every single cost cutter within a five minute walk of me is really fancy now. I don't understand why that is fucked up. Yo, it's incredible. Hey, buddy. Oh, what's wrong with his fucking neighborhood? The weird thing is it's like they're all like they all have like it's cost cutter organics now and they all have like nice

wood fronting and but they still are selling sort of like a 12 pound box of like, you know, Polish knockoff dishwasher tabs. All the same products, but it's trying to be a lifestyle brand now. I like the idea of Polish knockoff and dishwasher tabs and dishwasher. What the hell? Kalina, your dishes. Why are they Swedish? Oh, why are they Italian?

This is so dumb. Every time Milo doesn't, Milo does amazing on point accents for the British Isles and the Commonwealth. And then anytime it goes to the continent, it's just like, Hey, we're all from Italy. Sometimes we just throw in some Slavic words. This cold open is bad. Let's just cut to the theme song from here.

Hello and welcome back again to your weekly free TF. I am Riley in the studio with me and the guy household is Milo. Hey, it's me, your boy. It's good. I've just got back from the North where I attempted to civilize the peoples, not with great success, but I'm back. Actually, I really enjoyed Newcastle. Newcastle is great.

I would recommend it. Shouts out to Newcastle. I've also been asked to give shouts out to our listeners in Spain. So to all of our fans in the Iberian Peninsula, get your brain pan measured. See if you're actually sentient. Oh, yeah. All those guys, Gibraltar, Portugal.

I think that's all of it. We're also here with producer Nate. Hello. It's me, Nate. You know, funny talking about Gibraltar. I don't know if you remember this, but during it was in and around the time of the general election in 2017, there was this sun headline where they were basically trying to make menacing noises about Gibraltar. And I have no idea why.

I don't know if it's their style guy that they would never use an N. Yeah, like the Spanish, you know, diacritical mark, but they basically wrote talking about Gibraltar. We just want to blow the bloody seniors off and I don't know if they meant to blow them with bombs off the island. But it was like, do you realize this headline sounds like you want to suck off Spanish guys, right? It's the it's this is ultimate sort of reactionary British conservative mindset.

Is it all just comes down to like enraged, enraged sexuality? I was gonna say, it's like you're so mad at the Spanish with some jumped up idea that we're still going to suck their dicks. Exactly. We're so mad from a war that happened almost 400 years ago. Well, a little less than that, but still close. And we're like, I'm so mad at them. So I'm going to blow them. That isn't even the only time they've done away.

We have introduced like three fifths of the people on this podcast guys. We got to keep going. We have Hussein in the guy outpost in New York in Albany. Yes, I'm in another very weird room. In this very strange place in Albany, talking into the ether. I was going to ask Milo like on his civilized like his trip to civilize northern people, you came back of an hour in your ass, right? I did. Yes.

They they caught me in the act of trying to build a wall to keep the Picts out of Northumberland. God, the Sentinelese get everywhere. They really do. So we have Hussein living in what I guess is like a David Lynch dreamscape always just in different fancy rooms. And then we have Alice Avazandam joining us from Glasgow. Hello, Alice.

Hi guys. Thanks for having me. North of the wall. Yeah. And the even less civilized north. I'm happy to be diversifying your like male brochure list podcast by being a guest who just sounds like a male brochure list. Well, when no male brochure lists are available. Change has to come incrementally. Like you can't let go zero to a hundred.

No, absolutely. We have to work within the system and the system. Within and against the state. Oh, wait. Can I say one more thing about the Gibraltar thing? Of course, you can say what we're thinking about Gibraltar. There's always room for the Gibraltar. There was also another time when the sun tried to do a weird own

about Gibraltar and it was like less superficially insane, but more like Macron's because what they did was they they'd projected the words hands off our rock onto the rock of Gibraltar. But what I mean, that's kind of mental, right? But what they didn't realize was that what's really mental about it is that the rock of Gibraltar faces the sea. So you can't see that from Spain. They were like telling Morocco, hey, hands off our rock.

You Moroccan pricks. We know you're looking at our rock. We can you swore the motherfuckers over there eyeing up our rock lasciviously. Well, we're not having it. But this is like this is such sort of conservative protest mindset, right? Because this is kind of what Laura Loomer has done outside of Twitter,

where in response to getting banned, she's just handcuffed herself to the building and is in some kind of like feeble, weird, bizarre protest has just like been like just willingly peeing herself all day outside Twitter to protest getting banned. More on this later. No, I mean, I mean, I mean, shout out to Tim Paul for actually asking the asking me important questions

such as he was the first one to report that Laura Loomer was willing to pee her pants if it meant that she would get back online on Twitter. And the whole protest was based on the idea about banning Laura Loomer from Twitter and from tweezing Fox pics at Paul Joseph Watson was equivalent to the Holocaust. Well, it's weird because like Laura Loomer in a way was doing Twitter in real life outside the Twitter offices because she spent so much of her time peeing her pants online in a metaphorical sense. When they took away her Twitter, she was left with only one logical alternative.

It does put us in a weird position. Like if Twitter went down for good, well, we just have to become our terrible irony posting selves, but in real life, like when the things that you talk about Milo, with the, I don't know, Stuart Little, but analyzed to an immense degree. Like, could you just have to do that in real life? Like become a university lecturer on like Stuart Little studies? I do do that in real life. I'm a stand-up comedian. You may have realized what seems like a hellish dystopian world to you is actually my job.

So we've basically been talking. We've been unable to stop talking about this. But this is, you notice this, this is true with the Gibraltar thing. It's true with Loomer's thing. It's true. It's even true with like people sort of protesting that Brexit is being betrayed or being, you know, fulfilled improperly or fulfilled too much or whatever, is it's just these feeble, bizarre, completely non-metaphorical, like completely ultra-literal public humiliating protests.

The opposite of fancy Cascada is feeble, bizarre. Thank you. Malice, any takes on this? Yeah. My favorite thing about the sort of collapse of metaphor that happened here was that at one point they literally took her megaphone away so that she wasn't, she was unable to protest effectively and she locked her sign inside Twitter, inside the office. She had this sign saying, explaining why it was bad to ban her and she let go of it for a second in the process of handcuffing herself to the door and it got trapped inside without her.

And so she was just stuck there watching this sign and it was perfect. So yeah, that's the future now. There was just briefly a lady just handcuffed to Slitter with no particular agenda. She was just an accessory and they didn't press charges or anything. She could, she was free to go and the cops, I think at one point told her, you know, if you want us to cut the handcuffs off, just you just call us back and she just kind of just stayed there and just waited. There was a line that I saw somebody who was actually paying attention to the live stream

mentioned that one of the cops was like, you do know that there's other ways you can get online, right? Well, he's about to recommend gout. Let me into the internet headquarters. I demand to speak to the grand wizard of the internet. It's the all of the all of these people, all of these sort of conservatives whose whole thing is just getting furious all the time in public with sort of these elaborate symbols. They're all just turning themselves into drill at this point. Like they just they're so mad and so focused, but they'll never let anything go because all a lot of their protests are personal. It's like it's it's all don't ban me. Don't be mean to me.

I'm angry that you interrupted my lunch or telling me about boy pussy recently or like or like John Pandora. It's like yelling at schnippers for his order being like it's always these public meltdowns that are ridiculously humiliating and they just go further and further into it with like a white knuckled grip on their own sanity, a white knuckled grip due to the circulation being cut off by the hand. Well, something too that I that I noticed was like with people like John Pador, it's for example. It's always amazing to how there's the sort of duality of man aspect there where in literally in the span of five minutes, it can be like tear gas isn't defensive. We do it to the troops do it to children too. The next tweet is like,

no, I will not wait five hours in line for a pastrami sandwich, five hours. Okay, I wouldn't wait for five hours. Well, I mean he but but also you probably was a pastrami sandwich. I have to wait five minutes, but you have to get tear gas. John Pador would take that deal. It's true of the Brexit thing too though, because you know, we are going to be free to strike our own trade deals and to be a sort of buccaneering swashbuckling nation again. And within five minutes we're upset because our rock is being harassed. It's Gibraltar is just Britain's pet rock. I mean, I've told the Spanish thousands of times there be no buried treasure on Gibraltar.

We got so we got so much shit. So let's get into the content lads and lasses. Honorary lads. So we it's in the guy household. Everyone's an honorary lad. So basically there are when we again, we've all watched this video and it has been melting our brainstems the last couple of days, but there are tens of millions of aggregated views on YouTube for what can only be described as a toy that appears to teach children it's okay to play with shit. By the way, before we continue, welcome goes one guy. Well, welcome. Well, there are two girls. Welcome to all. Welcome. I back to of course to all of the listeners who first joined us for our Tom Kebassi Brexit episode, and I hope you're enjoying this jarring change in tone.

Right. So it's called the Poopsie surprise unicorn, and I can only assume that it is bringing us history's first algorithmically generated Christmas. I'm just going to say Poopsie surprise unicorn sounds like a really euphemistic way to describe an adult that is shit themselves. I mean, this product really does what it says on the tin because there's unicorns and it certainly surprised me. So I pulled the product description here. What it needs to do is it needs to have a DRM on it that turns like their voices into the sound of BLs above. The unicorn, the unicorn has glittery poo. Actually, that is what they sound like. That's a great idea. Like imagine doing a metalhead unicorn shit unboxing video

crossover. So everyone's very confused. I'm going to buy off the unicorn's head and shit it out. Everyone's very confused. So I'm going to describe what this project is project product. Watch this majestic unicorn magically poop slime with Poopsie unicorn slime surprise majestic with a little unicorn magic and sparkle. You can customize unicorn poop and transform it multiple times. Ten magical surprises included when you got to go store the poop slime in the collectible Poopsie keychain. Can you find the ultra rare unicorn sparkle? That was just words. I mean, what I did enjoy though was the phrase customizable unicorn poop as though people have been battling for years under the jack boot of off the peg.

One size fits all unicorn poop. They don't understand my specific unicorn poop needs. I need a tamed approach pressed by the drab monolith of big unicorn poop mass produced unicorn. This is the the apple ad from 1984 where it's big brother and the woman comes in slinging a gigantic bag of unicorn shit at the faceless at the faceless windows computer. That was my favorite part of the book. Nineteen eighty four. So Hussein, I have to ask since you're in America and you've gotten to see America and it's truly dark heart in upstate New York. Does this make sense now? Like why why weird adults dressed up as children dressed up as adults talking unicorn shit is a thing that apparently they have enough

enough demands that they can make money doing this? Like does it make sense now? No, it doesn't. Like even for me, someone who's been broken by the internet, like even this like surprised me and slightly traumatized me. And I was thinking I was thinking about why and it wasn't necessarily like the nature of the product per se, right? Because there are different ways that you could market it, but it was more like the kind of whole YouTube video that surrounded it was the thing that was like super disorientating. Like, you know, so you have these like two two women who are like in their early twenties and they're dressed in like unicorn suits and they're talking like children and like you can kind of tell like there's a look in their eyes where they

sort of know where you can kind of tell that they know what they're doing. It's just really absurd and ridiculous and like pretty disturbing to say they know what they're doing is wrong. Look, look right as as as a practicing Muslim, like I don't judge people my imam does. So I did send my video to send the video to him and he will be coming he will be writing a Friday sermon about it for next week. All I can say is when I watch this video, did I think Isis had a point? All the unicorn poop stuff was actually in the hadith. It's kind of like, here's a question I want to throw out to you guys. It's like, was what was like the most disturbing part of the video? Was it just like the kind of infantile

nature of it? Was it like the weird voices? Was it just generally the nature of like waiting for this toy to poop so you could play with that? Well, for me, it was the facial expression when they first like unveiled it because it was a whole unboxing thing. Right. They just had this kind of gray unicorn with a really weird facial expression like it wasn't meant to be filmed from that angle. And it just sort of descended from there into shit. And I was like watching fucking Salo. That's actually what happened. The reason I say this is the first algorithmically generated Christmas is this is a ludicrously popular toy. It's completely sold out. It's the toy of Christmas

apparently. What? I mean, like, oh, fuck. No, sorry. Hang on. I'm now on a whole new level of what the fuck because I thought this was like a niche thing. And I was being like, okay, there are always weirdos who'll be into anything and it's still weird that they're into it. But okay, it's like it's a small, it's like it's like the Tommy Robinson people. They're like, okay, it's bad, but like they're a small group that we can deal with them. But this is like a lot of people says FBPE. Follow back. Follow back poop excitability. Do it. Do it. Do a Venn diagram of Tommy Robinson supporters are FBPE people and people who have bought unicorn poopsies with their kids. It's a fucking circle. Why? Why? Why did my Facebook ads only reach joylian mom?

This windmill shits out unicorns. So basically like so this just to try and because it's hard to capture what this is, but it is a big unicorn and you feed it water and flour and sparkles, and then you hit a butt, you shake it up, you hit a button and then the unicorn shits slime you can play with. So I got to ask for, for those of you who have been in the UK much longer than I have, has the unicorn thing like the unicorn poop Starbucks, like there was the unicorn. This is what I was getting to. There's a thing in the US that was like this sort of color screen of like the insane bright colors, like swirly color things that are like you'll see cupcakes with that kind of like crazy level of color for everything died and they call it like

unicorn poop or like the unicorn cupcake or there was a Starbucks unicorn latte or something like that. I wrote a paste magazine article about it. Oh wow. Look at Riley, the serious journalist. I just had to live in that hell. So like for me, it was less like a thing to be observed and more is like, oh my God, they're doing unicorn shit again. People in Starbucks are like being abused to hell to make these fucking Starbucks lattes. I've just blazed right past ISIS. I'm like joining Al Shabaab by this point. Paul Pot had a point, didn't he? Like honestly, like Khomeini's right. Like that's fine. We can all agree on that unicorn shit. Unicorn poop slime toilet toys in Iran. That's right. That's why we need to submit to the

rightful governance of the Ayatollah Khomeini pure of heart. Anyway, Jack, and I have an equivalent. So let's let's let's suffer our British listeners. Riley, you wrote the article apparently. So tell us what you've described the unicorn Frappuccino adequately, but what I describe why I think this is the first algorithmically generated Christmas. Because you said it like a fucking Oxbridge professor. Well, I must say the right on over gentlemen gives an adequate description of the unicorn Frappuccino. But what I would add to his point. Okay. So the reason I said this is the first algorithmically generated Christmas is that what this toy has done is basically done the same shit that like like where you have

like Elsa from frozen getting your head cut off by the Joker or whatever like algorithmic kids. My favorite Batman film. So it where it's the same thing where all of these popular trends. The unicorn aesthetic because like the unicorn Frappuccino, you bought it so you could Instagram it. You didn't drink. It would taste like give you stomach. Yeah, it was just full of horrible. And so and and slime has been this huge trend. And so basically what happened is the algorithm just spat out unicorn slime and then a toy was sort of made almost automatically. And I'm pretty sure that those two sort of early 20s actresses playing young girls playing older women. It's really weird. I'm pretty sure like their script is almost written for them

algorithmically. And here's the other fucked up thing. The main re the unboxing videos of the unicorn slime Poopsie surprise thing are super popular. And the reason most kids want to get them apparently is so they can make unboxing videos of the unicorn Poopsie surprise. So I also would point out and I want to hand it over to to Allison Hussein. But really quickly another thing I point out is that like so much of this aesthetic also draws from the fact that like they basically the reason why it's so creepy with obvious adults playing children playing adults is that people got in trouble for a while for making YouTube because like really popular YouTube channels, you know, we're basically people exploiting their children

making their children do these like weird, not just unboxing videos, but even creepier ones like where like kids are like eat like very enthusiastically eating candy and be like it's so delicious. Just like making weird faces like imagine a 10 minute or 15 minute video of like children under the age of 10, like very theatrically eating candy, like how strange that is. But that was a very popular YouTube trend. And so in a set in a sense like this is their way like by having adults play children, they get around YouTube's content and monetization restrictions for videos that feature minors. But also again, I'd like to emphasize these are people buying people watching unboxing videos so they can buy a product to make their own unboxing video. Yes,

with their own adults dressed as children dressed as adults. I also want to say one other thing too is that the Unicorn Frappuccino in Starbucks was also hell on earth for Starbucks employees because it was so complicated to make and like painful. And it's just like one of those things where but like you described Riley, it was for an aesthetic. It wasn't it wasn't to drink, but I really want to focus on the fact that the people who are making video are making that this thing is being created on videos that is selling a product to people based on algorithms so they can make videos that are unboxing the product. Can we please do a review of a child doing an unboxing video? This is a tribute to another unboxing video. There's an important

there's another important thing that we're all missing out here which is that this year there is a big upsurge in poop related Christmas products for children. So I've just there's this piece in the Atlantic which I've just like brought up just now in which one of the most popular toys that's going to be out in 2018 is a product called poopies and poopies are quote unquote rolls of toilet paper that hold mystery capsules with names including Lil Squirt, Skidmark and Toot Fairy. Those are all sound like apples. These new blind capsules are creating a stink all over the kerb kerb plopuses faster than a fart disappeared in the wind according to marketing material on Amazon. So the piece is an actual toilet paper or is it like fake toilet paper that has

this stuff in it? So you supposed to actually wipe your arse with it and it like burst your arse. I think it's actual toilet paper but I haven't quite looked just yet. I don't understand like how else you would simulate like I don't understand how you how else you would simulate it. So the problem is that they didn't drop the neutron bomb after beanie babies and tickle me Elmo and now we have this like it just keeps getting worse. Well but it is all algorithmically generated and it is just for YouTube. It's just it's just an algorithm talking to itself at this point. Yeah my uh my proposed children's shitting Christmas toy this year is a special one where it's like it's a doll of Laura Loomer and you chain her to any door in your house

and uh you feed her any amount of just complete bullshit from Fox News and she just shits it all straight out. No the elf on the shelf that's some 2017 shit. Miss me with the elf on the shelf. We're now how if you want to like intimidate your children into behaving well this Christmas just chain Laura Loomer to their doors and have her yell at them every time they try to do anything. But I think I think like to be to be like slightly serious for a second and I'm sorry about this because I was the one who brought up the dragon dick like several times last week. Um there's an important there's an important discussion to have here about like consumption right like um in regards to tuberculosis. Well no it's just in regards to like how you know because these these are like

kids products right so like these kids are going to be like nagging their parents to like buy stuff but what seems to be like the person thing here is about unboxing and it's about like why is unboxing become like the big trend uh you know where kids kind of care more about like the packaging and the materials and making content where they can unbox like particular toys rather than the toys itself and what I was thinking was like quite interesting was the way that people like consume things these days so you know if you're an adult like you know some people they will like look on youtube videos for ages so that they can find the exact right product and like unboxing has become this big thing because of the way that we can we like consume stuff and like how our demands work

and how that sort of mirrors like how kids are pretty much doing the same thing like it's a very uniform way of like consuming products if that makes sense. We live in a society. Oh yeah. I genuinely did have like a proper serious theory about this just to refute the idea that I was the dumb guest um and then it turned out to be actually quite dumb but I'm going to say it anyway because I can't say it anyway yeah um so the the algorithm right is has basically sort of become a way of heightening contradictions in the same way that like late-stage capitalism does and my central thesis for this is that Donald Trump is the poopsie surprise in that right

so the poopsie surprise is weird because it's been generated by an algorithm that thinks okay well people like slime people like unicorns so we're going to have both of those but very much and there's this going to be this weird gestalt where it's more than the sum of its parts and it creates something really really weird. Donald Trump is like if an algorithm thought hmm what are US presidents like old white guy racist um you know kind of huge ego yeah good good business business deals and so on but all of those things but too much and in a weird unpredictable combination that doesn't make sense and makes everyone feel deeply uncomfortable. And just the the average of the president's horniness was really skewed by JFK and Bill Clinton

he's like a weird horny dude but who's also bad with women. Yeah I think I think that that's that I actually think that's kind of about right but also we have to remember that this year um slime unicorns and poop were put together by the algorithm uh next year the pooping unicorn is going to be put together with Trumpy Bear also by the algorithm and that's going to be the gift for because this is a gift for a for your your child and then the shitting Trumpy Bear is the gift for your grandfather who has the mind of a child. But I mean I'm also interested in the idea that we're not yet at the point where the algorithm is able to do the product design and actually like do the so so what the point I'm

making is that at some point a marketing person and a product design person and a person involved in like manufacturing had to get together and be like do the Venn diagram be like we need unicorns and slime and shit jokes and let's make it all together and it's like we're not yet at the point where it's so automated that people just accept it like oh this is what the machine gave us the machine gave us a unicorn shit for Christmas this year instead like someone has to be like that's sort of like and maybe it's just driven by a desire to make money that people just are willing to put up with whatever because typically they are but I can only imagine that there must be someone like every time this happens someone's dream is just being crushed like I thought I was

going to do something else with a product design degree instead I'm making a toilet that a unicorn shits into that just made me imagine like a version of our society where like civilization completely collapses but technology remains completely advanced and we're a bunch of pagans like praying to the machines for good gifts this year maybe that's what it is maybe the marketing industry is all engaged in like a rockers basilisk thing where they think the algorithm is going to come about sooner or later so if we just create the things that it wants now it won't punish us later guys guys guys guys what if the algorithm is the muddy I I also before we move move off of this this product I have I check some of the reviews for

this thing on amazon and they tend to be pretty glowing some people are angry that it's hard to clean but generally people seem to like the shitting unicorn this thing which is based entirely around shitting and slime is hard to clean astonishing here is the best review five stars these toys are fantastic there's absolutely nothing sexual too long if I fail to find non-sexual toys for my children they're toys if you don't like it don't buy it love the slime in my kids love the unicorns and I'm gonna buy all of them I can love the slime review of my sex life right he's converting his entire life savings into shitting unicorns but this also is weird because when it says you don't like it don't buy it I'm going to buy all them I can for them it's almost

like those people who are like weird brand evangelists they're like I'm gonna buy like the people who are really into soda stream and they're like I don't care if soda stream is made in the west bank settlements I like soda streams from to buy 50 fucking soda streams like imagine if you're that person but for a uniform uniform poop slime thing what politics what like looks like you do feminism by going to see the Wonder Woman movie a couple years ago right what politics do you do by buying the unicorn thing like maybe that's accelerationism you're supporting Lorely man I mean I think one of those things is that we look at it we're like oh you do this if you're like extremely online but I sort of got I mean I imagine if you have kids like it has nothing to do with

being like extremely online and the in the ironic way it's literally like no this is what your kids want like this is this is normal now the kids brains have been distorted in such a way that there's like no playing with unicorn poop is is fun and it's normal and it's what I want but it's not just playing with unicorn poop it's playing with unicorn poop in such a way that you hope 100 thousand people will watch you I mean that that in many ways is what podcasting is isn't it when you when you google it like no one else there's so many kind of positive reviews about it and so many so I was like a mumsnap of that famous site like just now looking at like reviews looking at like reviews of like this this fucking like poop see unicorn and everyone's

is saying it's great they're like oh I'm gonna get this for my kid this is gonna be like a perfect stocking stuff stuff and like you know mumsnet are like completely fine with this kind of weird sexual pooping you know I would have imagined they would have found some way to be really transphobic about it but apparently I was about to say that like they're really kind of you know they hate trans people but you know that that's the line the line is the line is trans people but not with sexual pooping unicorns who wear like crop tops have you seen like the toy the unicorn toy like they all wear crop tops who's saying didn't you listen to the review they're not sexual okay okay well look it's actually regularly new unicorns are naked so

it's modest fashion so I think that's that's the unicorn uh that it's just been burning a hole in my brain for the last couple of days and now you all have to think about it I'm looking forward to the reign of the machines why does generations can be so normal I would like I imagine this generation might also turn around and reject all the stuff and just decide they like no no they won't no they won't no they're gonna be cutting us for our meat in the climate this it's yeah it's fine can you making unboxing videos as they strip the meat from out of here you are the box and the organs the subject of the video and they'll just go how to how to how to field dress in butchero human videos I have to say really quickly

I know it's off topic but when you think about like what for each age of this generation like as kids are making unboxing videos what are they going to be making as adults in my mind immediately flash to like like the home blacksmith youtube channel of this guy who does blacksmithing explain why actually jet fuel can melt steel beams of course yes I can't I can't wait to unbox the truth about 9 11 whoa you know so wow spicy that's spicy so I'm gonna move on to the next the next thing that sort of hoved into view this is actually this is actually an Alice spot on this one yeah it's a startup called ambulans explain it okay so it's disrupting the world of emergency medical care because tech guys keep inventing the bus because they are stupid and

they see the problem in front of them that's been caused by defunded public services so they see people who can't get transport and they think I'll invent the bus in this case they've seen people who can't get an ambulance and think well I'll invent an ambulance but there'll be an app and it'll be like it'll be different because I'll take some of the consonants out or the vowels out rather and it'll be an ambulance and it'll be bright blue it's the color of a smurf it's very disconcerting and you have a little app on your phone so you can track where the ambulance is and it's yeah I love when I'm like so injured that I need an ambulance so I open up like an uber like app and try to wrestle with my location on the map for five minutes yeah when you see

it written down it looks like the name of a town in Hungary or something it's kind of so I have I have some of so I think we can describe it basically as uber for ambulances and I've got some of the copy from the website here ambulans can you do an ambulance pool ambulans is a new kind of on-demand ambulance service provider that is transforming medical transportation through the use of disruptive technology since when of ambulance has not been an on-demand service who keeps an ambulance on retainer like just in case oh I always bring my ambulance with me because you never know well who's in an ambulance and thinks I wish this experience could be more disruptive but that's not even the end of the sentence better compensation

for EMTs and a unique business model that and I'm going to add the word somehow somehow guarantees the highest level of care it guarantees the highest level of care because what what is not telling you is that the the ambulance service also also makes innovative pizzas it's like the highest level of care they're going to cauterize your wounds in the pizza oven always be hustling and they say ambulance and so what it is is an EMT will be a private contractor and then they'll like sign up to this service and they'll just drive an ambulance around for a while waiting for a call and it says ambulance allows EMTs to build a path to entrepreneurship and the ability to build meaningful careers in the ambulance service

why not turn your job into a career yeah the trouble with careers in the in the ambulance service before was that they were too meaningless but now that I work for this insane startup who had me driving around aimlessly waiting for people on an app to tell me that their knee hurts I feel much better what what I just find insane about it right is that this is we have had this just as a service provided by the government or the the local health service provider it's just a thing they do and completely unnecessarily we've just sort of complicated our relationship to it but also turned it into entrepreneurship somehow because everyone has to be an entrepreneur now well also I mean if people can't afford an ambulance it's because they don't have health insurance in the

United States and ambulance transportation costs a ton so the idea that like the problem is that people don't know how to dial 911 the problem if that's the problem not the fact that people can't afford the cost because I keep thinking too about like what did they say what was the what was the ad copy they use the highest level of care it's like well they don't really they perform cardiac surgery in the ambulance they have to take you to the hospital and if your problem is you can't afford an ambulance you probably can't afford cardiac surgery either so in a way it's just sort of like what if your phone could tell you when the ambulance was coming but like that doesn't get away from the fact that like black mirror what if your phone could tell

you when the ambulance was coming damn Charlie Brooker got really lazy what if what if your phone could tell you when the ambulance was coming in the future when you're going to get hurt because it could predict that's the next thing that's black mirror what if your what if your ambulance shut rainbows why is your ambulance I'm not going to bring up Jason state them the also because like this is just a bullshit company that does nothing to keep themselves high and like google search rankings for when people search you know bullshit ambulance company they have they just constantly churn out nonsense blogs so a lot of these tech companies do this they'll just blog about any old subject that sort of just crosses their viewpoint and here is one of their blogs

that's particularly tasty recently in Los Angeles California a heavily intoxicated Heather Locklear was arrested back in June after EMTs and cops responded to her home on a disturbance call they tried to load her onto a gurney when she threw a barrage of punches at them well EMTs and paramedics losing their lives in the field is extremely rare what is growing is the number of EMS worker injuries treated at US hospital emergency departments due to violent acts so well the country decides debates whether or not to arm teachers we in the EMS community debate whether or not we should arm EMTs so this is like the algorithmically generated blog post yeah absolutely for for SEO ranking to improve so when you think about school shootings and

arming teachers you also get ambulance yeah results in your search oh yeah so I actually I met a guy who is an EMT in San Francisco for the fire service and he was telling me that it's great because he has the right to like tranquilize anyone he wants surely not anyone who just comes into view well but no basically yeah so that's like that is like a rule with the EMTs because to protect themselves are allowed to just sedate people at will and he was like and you don't have to like they don't even have to have interacted with you like if you if you're approaching a situation and you can see that someone is like potentially dangerous you're allowed to literally come up behind them and like stiff them with fucking tranks and I was like that's like that's

like a weird superpower they're solid snake their early game solid snake exactly well yeah exactly I mean as EMTs approach the objective you know they walk up on guards who say whose footprints are these and you know they got to turn themselves this box doing here exactly you're getting you're getting punched in the face as you try and change Laura Loomis diaper and then suddenly over the radio it's like snake the other thing is interesting actually if you can successfully complete five transportations to a hospital then as an EMT you can call in an airstrike if someone's tries to punch you I was going to say but you have to make sure that you that you you push your controller buttons fast enough otherwise the ambulance takes you to a hospital that has

Otacon instead of maryl so Lisa Lisa Rena from melrose place has been verbally abusive to me I'd like a triple tap airstrike on her location yeah they have a heather locklear thing is not getting nearly enough attention analysis of highly intoxicated heather locklear no less the worst kind just completely blind drunk and throwing a barrage of punches like pi may I would be really pleased if I was that drunk and my punches were still described as a barrage like if I was in that condition it would be one vaguely aimed punch that fell extremely wide in the mark oh yeah so I myself uh have responded to emergency calls late at night in areas that have high crime rates and have found it to be uneasy safety is everyone's primary concern

he likes to or a black child selling lemonade he was like oh god I feel safe I need a gun it's just heather locklear house yeah drink this kid heather locklear doing method act to play the black child of lemonade stand quickly quickly someone give me the rocket launcher I need to rocket jump away but with arving our ems community with guns take it one step too far I like that they don't actually come down on it like they're like hey you know maybe you know we should get you should have like you know your your defibrillator and then your deagle yeah normal oh yeah I love I love perforating someone because they looked at me sideways but I would I have to ask this question Alice because you discovered this one and you referred it to our to our tech critique service

that we provide for our customers here um it seems like this would be even more dystopian when you're from a country where uh ambulances are free yeah well you don't have to pay like five thousand dollars a ride it's a lot more existentially terrifying I think um also because our ambulance service I I don't know a lot of paramedics or anything myself but I think the whole tranquilizing people just for being around you thing might might be a bit unfamiliar to me as well it's called self-care yeah I'm looking at your grandma just going to people who've had heart attacks and causing a disturbance in the hope of getting that sweet tranquilizer just getting fucking he's not going harassing paramedics because you're addicted to tranquilizers

well yeah exactly but see that's the if it's ambulance just regular service ambulance they're just gonna hit you with tranquilizers but if you call for a black ambulance or ambulance x are going to hit you with catamine so clearly you know you got to pay that extra charge you get this special joe rogue and ambulance or the tranquil dmt so here's a name I've also found another review of this company by a former employee I worked at this quote unquote company more like a pyramid scheme think cutco knives for eight months here's my advice stay far away if you're a new emt and they offer you a job here please don't take it it's a trap i'm serious you get no training no calls that are interesting or challenging no experience on communications because they dispatch

you through an app the owner is this guy called stan who's just hanging out in new york biding his time until another investor comes along to buy it out from under him the bottom line is that the company is toxic and useless well the thing is that with those hit the problem with the communication between the owner stan and the emt's is that he's been writing them letters but they still ain't calling maybe right so the dress is too sloppy when he jots them I don't know yeah so this is just this is a guy who invented a useless app that just sends untrained paramedics apparently who are allowed to just kill you no I mean to be fair Milo's comment about the solid snake tranquilizing people in advanced thing that's actual san francisco paramedics right

yeah yeah okay that's real yeah he had genuinely is allowed to do that that's a real thing no I get that I'm just saying that uh you wanted to stress that that was that was a thing that happens in america so america's fuck regardless if stan loses his job if his company gets bought out and they stop uh they stop having this horrible nightmare uber for ambulances you can still get shranked as a precautionary don't you can still just go up you can still just go up and start fucking with paramedics until they hit you with that sweet ether I'm hitting you up with a cloth soaked in Lordenham just like hey hey take some of this a pull of this sweet opium delicious oh yeah

anyway uh so yeah that's that's ambulans uh and it is one of my favorites on the subject of health and technology uh the trash futures favorite sort of ministerial dullard matt hancock has been in in the headlines again I love it when he does stuff it's so great parkouring his way into the headlines so matt hancock basically has been interviewed in an article in george osborne's evening standard which appeared to be some kind of paid sponsorship by an app company a health app company called babelon which makes the app gp at hand which matt hancock is relentlessly promoting in the article the minister of health it's just a it's just a slower ambulance as you just put on the app it just brings you a gp to give you some more of them oh yeah absolutely I mean I'm

now a fan of this app can we promote this app too who needs a gp when you can just fuck with a paramedic I was just saying with the prerogative conscious if they just give us an endorsement deal then we can just flash a gold card and get tranked anytime we see an emt right so um basically this article is where it's about matt hancock talking about digitization and the funding challenges on the on the nhs that vittories create by not funding it enough um and matt hancock's solution as we've discussed in the podcast before has always been what if we could put more apps into play like how can we find these little tiny efficiencies to make up for the gigantic suppering wound of underfunding and so the article says hancock has always been an outspoken supporter of technology

which has not been without controversy for example the app he made that snooped everyone's pictures and looked at everyone's nudes very normal um on his phone his many apps include gp at hand created by babalon the health care company which partners with the futures london health project who commissioned this article this led to criticism that he was endorsing an app that may encourage people to leave their own gp practice causing gp practices to lose money what others suggested his service was cherry picking younger more tech savvy patients and then matt hancock uses this article to respond on behalf of babalon he's not a minister he's just doing an like an infomercial at this point it's also weird to me that matt hancock has like he's advertised i was having

this gp at hand app on your folks i've let you have to like need the gp a lot to make it worth having this is like i am a sickly in frail all like you said earlier who would have an ambulance on retainer tory minister is to have an ambulance on retainer they're all dying i suffering from an acute case of having a made up name it's it's very funny that he is it's very funny to me it's it's gives his constant source of delight that our health minister is such a cheerful chirpy dullard that he just sees his job not as representing the interest of the you know people who need health care i mean he's a tory of course he doesn't see that but that he more sees himself as just the pitch man for uber for doctors if that's his brilliant

solution well that there wasn't anything wrong with basically making a statement and publishing an article in defense of a company while also in a government ministry position like the idea that there's no conflict of interest there like that just seems to be a statement of what passes for normal like what's passes for a good idea amongst people like matt hancock absolutely it's not that the the NHS has to be underfunded more efficiently rather than being better funded matt hancock just goes like full influencer and starts posting pictures on his instagram of like him in a bikini on the beach and it's like the photo is like 90% his ass and then the caption's like i love the beach but i also love knowing that i can

contact my gp at any time through a convenient online interface he's gonna be into unboxing videos i was about to say matt hancock is definitely going to be the type of guy who like genuinely advertises the poopsie unicorn as the future of like the british economy the british economy yeah that's actually my gp now is a pooping unicorn but you know you know what the difference is actually genuinely like between matt hancock writing an advertorial in support of gp at hand and the evening standard is and then like a woman with a big button instagram selling like skinny tea or whatever it's respectability that's the difference matt hancock and the evening standard are more respectable is identical in every other

way i think you're going to say less they're identical in a sense they both have their ass out and here's what's funny is is hancock said the article goes on with technology on the horizon for a health service which we cherish so dearly there are some sorry phrase that is with technology on the horizon like as if technology hasn't existed since at least like 1750 not before technay it's a greek-ass word there are some understandable questions that need to be answered for example will the incorporation of technology in the uk health care provide an opportunity for private companies to profit from the nhs it will if i'm in charge i am completely against the

privatisation of the nhs matt hancock said insisting our health service is safe in his hands even though he is of course you know justifying underfunding it by like partnering with various like global app developers yeah i i also greatly enjoyed that he's described in this article as wearing an nhs flag that is set an nhs like pin badge that is set within the lgbt rainbow flag as like matt hancock has like designed a family crest for himself it's extremely cool at a time when uh being trans my trans health care on the nhs is literally the tracker from ordering a pizza i get like like the little dominoes robot that tells me that like somebody named kyle is making my fucking pepperoni pizza is in charge of like my major life health decisions so i track a track

how trans you are any given moment exactly what elements of being trans are there's prep bake out for delivery so could technology start to fix these immediate problems i've had people say to me it's all very well and good you're interested in technology but we need more nurses hancock says but he insists ai can help too suggesting technology can help cut waste and improve patient experience that the algorithm takes over health care well you seem to have a cute dysentery but what we've done is we've died your shit to look like glittery rainbow poo because that is apparently what you want now good day this is bringing health care back to the days of

louis the 14th and as the thing it's the that hancock says oh i'm not going to privatize it no company is going to be able to make money we understand we need more nurses but every time he's pushed on it he's like oh yeah he handways he's away of course we need more nurses but what about this app what if this app was a nurse yeah what if your mom was a nurse black merits i feel a lot of people live that black mirror episode yeah that's why it's so insightful yeah damn we live in this society i've heard that we do live in one of those anyway so yeah that's that's matt hancock yet again parkouring over the nation's underfunding crisis by creating uber for kidney transplants i guess maybe he can partner with ambulance and we can not have to

suffer through having trained emt's anymore yeah we'll say just shoot us and put us out of our misery yeah an app will shoot you at any time any time of your just a gun that's not a nap i feel like that's gonna sink by bluetooth with your gun i i feel like that's going to be like the next like n r a product to try like you know at you know try advertising is a cool like millennial um brand um yeah i'll be like i'll shoot like well they kind of did this actually it didn't really get any press but like i think earlier this week the tories voted to remove the ban on high powered rifles so that's exciting that's coming to an ambulance near you i guess matt hancock's been gaming and he's like yo i need to bar at 50 cal these noobs for real life

he's been playing red redemption too and this is like this has been taken this is he's just taking it too seriously now no matt matt hancock we're bringing back high powered rifles but in case we need to ever hunt tanks yeah so uh this is this is the we're gonna steer away from technology a little bit uh and we're gonna we're gonna go into uh talking about something that's been circulating quite a bit on twitter um which is uh this video that has emerged which appears to show uh a student in the north in huddersfield um beating up south of the wall yes indeed uh basically like some fasc kid uh beating up and bullying and waterboarding a syrian refugee and to nobody's surprise at all um tommy robinson has already leapt to his defense

wearing a video posted on facebook the former leader of the edl said that this syrian kid had allegedly been um attacked involved in an attack on a young girl that left her black and blue this claim is of course immediately denied by a woman reporting to be the girl's mother so this is just tell me robinson supporters read so slowly that they initially read that as an attack on an attack on a local girl that left her black and they were like oh god no and they're like and blue oh that's okay right also the yeah and so like this is just this is just grooming gangs um this is just grooming gangs hysteria but uh you know tommy robinson is just cooking it up again but if i kitchen with tommy robinson if i can find like the one sort of humorous silver

lining here once again tommy robinson appears to be illegally interfering in an ongoing court proceeding which has led me to conclude that he has been cursed by a witch to enter an islamophobic witch to interfere in ongoing court proceedings look if god didn't want us to interfere in ongoing court proceedings why did he make it so god damn delicious right so um the other the other thing that i kind of notice about this is that tory mps had been talking about how this is shocking behavior this is uh completely of it's oh this is not our britain this is not the place we made you know conservative mp tabias elwood responded this bully way that's a real man and not someone you may know right i can't tell anymore either i'm getting very good at making up conservative

ministers um you know so mp backbencher uh tabias elwood tweeted this bully his parents the school where this occurs and the onlookers failed to step in all have big questions to answer to the syrian refugee i say sorry it's not the welcoming friendly britain we are supposed to be uh it's just the welcoming friendly britain where we deport grandparents from the caribbean just because oh yeah yeah literally hostile environment yeah like the whole point is that we want to be as cruel as possible to immigrants so that they don't come to britain and it's like wow people are being really cruel to immigrants what where would they ever get that idea yeah this fucking guy tabias elwood was actually he was like a junior minister in the foreign office at the same time that we started

bombing syria in the first place so like yeah i know it's isn't he the guy but like loved off saudi arabia or like Bahrain or like one of these like gulf states like he was on and he was like on news night like very kind of openly like shilling for them oh yeah absolutely he's he's not he's he's very sorry that this happened but also um he's you know a large part of the reason why this kid isn't still fucking hams in the first place and yeah it also strikes me that this is once again one of those stories in which the racism isn't actually the thing people are mad at there's mad that it's vulgar that like as long as it's polite racism like you know making making your university registration or your your letting office or i don't know anywhere in your life your bank yeah be a

border cop to fucking check your documents like i think that that's good that's that's just wise immigration policy but then kids getting this messaging from their parents and their communities and beating up other kids who are who are migrants like who are refugees that is that's rude bridge too far that's rude exactly and i think i think like you've hit the nail on the head because when i saw this video it was like okay this was like a really horrible video to watch but it was also like a lived experience for like anyone who wasn't a white person right so like this has happened to me like several times when i was in school and you know very white school in ken or like pretty much everyone else who i spoke to that this is a part of like a lived experience of being

like an ethnic minority um in a country that like for a long you know that has always kind of turned a blind eye to like these forms of racism right so like what is the difference here the difference number one is that like someone filmed it on their phone and it went viral and you know in you know so in a million other cases that wouldn't happen but then i think you've also hit the nail in the head and kind of saying that you know these people who are like you know saying that they're outraged by you know what's happened you know what they're actually signaling is that like oh yeah like when we put it into like policy when we wrap it up in like layers upon layers of bureaucracy um you know it's fine if we create like a really like horrific immigration

system which like actively targets people and you know forcibly deports people um especially you know you know especially like black people um but when we have to see it ourselves like when we have to see the ugliness ourselves that's when we'll be like oh this isn't the country that you know we you know we are tolerant britain like this isn't our country it's like yeah it absolutely is this is the first time you had to like deal with it on an aesthetic level agreed yeah so that's the thing this and this is the this is the same party that in the same town in huddersfield has been making a specifically racialized issue of the grooming gangs so you know you wanted to be the party of tommy robinson congratulations to bias elwood you literally did

this welcome to the hostel environment i forgot about this i forgot about the grooming scandal over in huddersfield oh my god but like okay wow that makes like the same fucking town yeah it makes makes like the whole dynamic really different um wow yeah i didn't i i didn't i forgot i completely forgot about that yeah and the thing is but you can see but conservative mp's like i've noticed them doing this a lot recently because all of the insane policies that they've been pushing for the last well decade or ever like they're just reaching this breaking point now where they're starting to see like this is they can't ignore it anymore so the anisubri did this last week as well where it came out that a young woman with chrysophyll yacob disease um had her care her

carer had her benefits cut when basically that this person wasn't ruled sick enough um and then um this person's not done a kickflip in months and then anisubri responds no if snow butts no excuses this is a disgrace and not what i voted for when supporting much needed benefit reforms well you know what anisubri this is literally what you voted for this is the britain that you created i'm just going to say this uh as as an outsider um the only policy is brexit yeah exactly well i mean anisubri is the turkey going wait i thought we ate geese at christmas this this kind of argument that it's not us that's something that's very very familiar to americans i think because whenever there's something like this um the same dynamic takes place but the right

doesn't even try anymore it's more the it's the center left who is a native the center the center right really who have enabled it will always say this was not what i was voting for when i voted for the bomb syrian children into the dust act like it's it's the same kind of i don't know like like performative naivety and you see this over and over again and now and it's obviously so just ingenuous but to me i think it's just strange that that uh in this case something that that mylo and i talked about it's been that hussain and i've talked about too is that there's a specific element to this because it's so disgusting this is a kid whose family literally are refugees from a war zone but if they weren't refugees if they were just like hussain said just ethnic minorities in

britain who who came here who might have been here for multiple generations getting your ass kicked by a bunch of racist white kids would be normal like this might be a scandal because it was a video like in like regional news but it wouldn't be a national scandal because that's what people have become used to so the idea that you're going to say to say this is disgusting great but be like this isn't who we are is like i think everybody fucking knows yes it absolutely is who we are and when someone likes when someone like subri or someone like elwood right when they say this isn't who we are i think the reason that they can really think that is because i think they believe the bullshit that benefit reforms are going to work when it targets the most needy

or that smart bombs aren't going to like you know triple tap a wedding like they think it's all going to work and they just they don't critically engage with it they're like okay well no if we do good means testing then no one's going to miss out on benefits unless they need them perfect i'm voting for everyone who needs benefits to get them we'll just conveniently ignoring or pushing off to some darkened corner of their head the sort of secure in the knowledge that no this is going to go wrong and like we are going to as we always do every time we vote as the right we are going to vote to make the united kingdom stupider poorer and crueler and then they just get to say it's not their fault because they had a system really really quickly there is one other silver lining

to this which is it just came out literally a couple of hours ago that the the fascists the kid who like assorted this refugee in the video um he was charged with assault but he's out on bail with no bail conditions and has fled the country and is now with relatives outside the uk so well then he's he's no refugee he's definitely gone he's definitely gone to australia those were refugees of racism count he's woke the famous the famous safe haven for white refugees who are also the first slaves he's been adopted by myla unopolis you know what i i wouldn't actually be surprised if that was in it you know if that if that did happen where like you know he would you know he would give like an exclusive interview to like fucking myla or tommy robinson

or something like that oh no oh no this kid this kid's gonna get a spectator column oh yeah like yeah um and you know i'm still waiting for like brendan spicy take about how like the far left or really the ones who uh went went too far in demonizing this young boy like and i can definitely see that happening you might not have to wait that long hussain because actually did i segue did i segue you segued you segued mylo i believe you found another brendan o'neill article that no one else has seen uh yes in keeping with the trash region tradition that we no longer read any brendan o'neill articles that we haven't written ourselves uh all right so what what's this one take it away here is uh me dressed up as brendan o'neill dressed up as me um i believe it was george

orwell who said the word racism doesn't really mean anything and never has it been more true than this week as the chattering classes of this once great nation have once again banded together to brand some school children as racists i'm talking of course about the video that emerged of some 16 year old schoolboys engaging in the time old rough housing schoolboy pursuits of shoving one another playful jeering and pretending to waterboard a refugee child do refugees face difficulties in the uk certainly were these boys over zealous in their tomfoolery sure but does that warrant the online witch hunt which has resulted in one of these young lads being charged with assault by the police your silence speaks volumes they've even they've even gone so far as to say that the

boy must be a racist because he liked some tomy robinson posts on facebook but people can be fans of tomy robinson for many different reasons some are there for the white nationalist rhetoric sure but others still are interused by the mortgage fraud or being democratic football lads now contrast the online twitter mob of sjw's in this instance baying for the blood of these young rap scallions these we ruddy face chaps these zealous and hearty lads over failing to roll out the red carpet and welcoming foreigners to their shores with their reaction to the murder of a missionary at the hands of the inhabitants of the remote sentinel islands this week whilst one anti-immigrant attitude is racist backwards and to be derided the other is to be celebrated

their righteous resistance to the so-called colonialism of the so-called white man a white man they killed in cold blood for the crime of wanting to read to them from the only text that could save their mortal souls the most holy of holy books 1984 indeed i would go so far as to say that this missionary as a white man asserting his right to freedom of speech is the real refugee fleeing not war but the cultural marxism telling him he can't measure people's skulls at work he is the first martyr in a war of freedom of speech which has long been brewing oh my god i'm dying we're never reading another brand new new article ever again i'm 100% sure that you could write you could write one of these articles up in like 20 minutes

send it to kulat and they would publish it may i wish for your 2019 goals like 100% sure you could do this some of these have to go in the trash reach a book i said tease that too much oh tease me tease me oh my goodness who boy oh i think that's a that's a good high note to end on everybody um i'm going to say as always we have a patreon you can subscribe to it five bucks a month you get a second episode if for some reason you want more of this and also you could consider commodifying your descent with a t-shirt from little comrade maybe you could what could we get it what can we get on at this time oh maybe see

what the algorithm says i can only imagine that whatever it comes up with from this episode alone will will make ed very upset yeah upset ed by asking for something to do with like like a unicorn poop or something or i'd appreciate a t-shirt that says i'm just here for the mortgage fraud yeah get that get that get that on a trash future t-shirt and thank you also to jin sang for our theme song it's called here we go you can find it on spotify which is very good and thank you to alice for wasting her time coming on our tumble thank you guys thank you very much for coming on thank you very much for listening and we will see you later so