TRASHFUTURE - The Dentists of Nonce Alcatraz

Episode Date: November 12, 2024

We’re speedrunning Blairism in the UK with new feigned outrage about NHS dental care in prisons. We love a carceral state but we hate that it might be obligated to provide some services to prisoners. We also talk about a 23-and-Me equivalent getting bought up and absorbed into… the wider project of a scientific racism freak? It’s been a weird few days. Get access to more Trashfuture episodes each week on our Patreon! *MILO ALERT* Check out Milo’s UK Tour here: https://miloedwards.co.uk/live-shows *TRASHFUTURE LIVE SHOW ALERT* We will be live in London at Between the Bridges on Sunday, November 24! Get tickets here. Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), Hussein (@HKesvani), Nate (@inthesedeserts), and November (@postoctobrist)

I recently have been seeing United States of Canada and Jesus Land maps getting posted from First Principles and I don't know what that means. It means that we live in hell. In case that wasn't obvious from the previous episode, we live in hell now. Or at least, Americans live in hell. We live in like, the pre-drinks for hell. We live in hell's like, a place that really wants to be hell? Yeah.

We live in like a place that an estate agent would sell to you as hell, but it isn't actually. It's like quite a walk. Off brand hell. From the middle isle of Liddell. It's actually called like, Heel. Purgatory is south hell. Many people say it's just as bad. Listen mate, Purgatory's actually got great rail links to hell. Like, in some ways it's better than living in hell, because like when you're in hell, you know, you've got the demons, you've got the people being tortured, you've got the demons, you've got the people being tortured,

you've got all the, you know, the apostates and what have you. Whereas when you're in purgatory, it's very calm, it's very nice, but when you wanna go to hell, you know, it's 10 minutes on the bus. And that's why it's so up and coming. 1500 PCS. Actually, a hell restaurant has just opened up.

So like maybe- Hell's Kitchen. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Violet. I've seen so like, maybe. Hell's Kitchen. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Violet. I've seen so much, it's so brought me back to my, like, teen years, my early teen years. It's a bit of a time capsule in a lot of ways, right? Not just to 2016, not just to the, like, resistance pussyhat stuff, but like, to the really dark days, to the Bush administration, you know?

It's like 2005 out there. What we need now more than ever is a rally to restore sanity. Because clearly the last one didn't work. Restored sanity for a bit. It's a bit like CBT, right? Restored sanity for a bit, but then, you know, some things change in your life. You get a bit more, you know, a bit more stressed. Effortlessly restored sanity in 2010.

Yeah. No, we, I think we need the rally to restore insanity. Whoa. To make Britain more like the rest of the world. Okay. Fucking the Joker over here. The rally to put Marc François in charge of the UK. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You're thinking far too literally. I'm talking about, it's like the rally to restore sanity, but it's a concert. It's like Woodstock 2006 being done in 2024. We're getting the surviving members of NoFX, AFI, and Sum 41. We're getting Sublime. We're all going to listen to that Ben Fold song where he says the N-word on his cover of Bitches Ain't Shit. Steve-O is going to start drinking again.

He's going to be doing NOS. The Vyvanz era is out. The Ritalin era is back in, Bamarjera at the age of 55 is going to send his father's wheelchair off a ski jump and that's going to fix politics in Britain. I mean, I think this is... I understand so few of those words. What you're trying to capture there is the kind of jackass forever politics, right? Which understands voting for Trump or staying home and Trump getting elected as a kind of cry

for attention and for help. Yeah, it's punching a wall. Yeah, exactly. Don Vito would have voted for Trump. Oh, they're going to bring back Don Vito. They're going to resurrect the man. We're not going to vote for Tracey Vance. Rage Against the Machine is going to play on the Newgrounds stage.

Stop saying that. The mini clip arena presented. When Kamala said we're not going back, she meant to like 2005. Is the thing. We're all getting early spyware on our family computer from my Comet cursor. Uh huh. Yeah. Uh huh.

Yeah, you just don't have the reference point for 2005 in the UK when you were downloading 50 cent off of LimeWire. Oh god, yeah. Yeah, the real shit. But if you think about it, in Britain we've already skipped directly to the second half of the Tony Blair Premiership. I've seen so much stuff time travelling. Both forwards and backwards at the same time.

Kirstam in the gamer headset doing a speed run, you know. All some third ways done quick. We don't need to do a short start, it's a waste of time. Doesn't affect percentage completion. It's just going to get defunded anyway. We're going to go straight to the Iraq war, but we're going to min max it. Yeah. What did we have? We have a labor government that is completely out of options and is increasingly unpopular because of its Middle Eastern tangle. You're right. We got to go back to 2005 and be like, you know, Keir Starmer, right?

The reason why all this shit is happening is because of oil. He loves it. Loves oil. Everyone says Keir Starmer loves oil. Trump lied. People died. Strategic limestone reserves. Yeah, Keir Starmer is Prime Minister in the same way that like a guy in a sore trap is a bone surgeon, you know? And jigsaw is the right wing press. Yeah. I mean, if you want to talk about that, I found an article that time traveled here from 2005, which is from the Telegraph.

This was emailed today from the Telegraph. The Telegraph was like, we need to tell Riley about this one. He's going to love it. And you know what? They were right. I received a Telegraph. Prisoners have better access to dentists than millions of law abiding patients. The telegraph can reveal. If you fix your teeth by knocking out someone else's, what a brilliant policy.

I like the idea that they're like, they're taking your dentist away and giving it to a criminal. That's what the woke are doing. We haven't seen articles like this in like over it This is the kind of shit that Boris Johnson used to write when he was a journalist putting out shit being like oh, you know New asylum seekers are getting free in Visalign Meanwhile hard-working British nans are being forced to like tie their wonky tooth to a door handle Hard-working law-abiding Britons are being forced to go as far as Turkey for dental care. They show a clip, just look at this poor unfortunate soul and it's just be vo. Hard working Britons are being forced to stop chewing their food because all of the dentists

have been given to criminals. But like, this is the thing, right, and so is the discourse about imprisonment. like if you put people in prison then part of the deal is that you have to take care of them That's kind of what you're signing up for when you do that and everybody who's like we got to imprison more people as soon As they find out about that aspect of imprisonment is like go I fucking hate that shit wait until they hear that Prisoners get free lunches and school children don't Come God. It's just like Jeremy Corbyn's in charge. Convicts, including those in high security jails for pedophilia, are able to get standard NHS dental care as quickly as the same day and are exempt from paying. I love the especially thing there because you'd be like, there's a kind of two tier

system of dentistry where it's like, yeah, nothingces though. They have to have fucked up wonky teeth. High security jails for paedophilia. The most sick jail in the country where all the nonces are locked up, getting constant round the clock dental care, probably because of all of the sweets that they've eaten due to being a nonce, and having to taste test them in order to figure out which sweets would be most appealing to the children what they shag. It makes me sick. And that guy, that character, he went to sleep as soon as the coalition government got in power and then woke up in the last couple of months. Yeah, he's the one who's woke.

Yeah, inspection reports reveal prisons housing some of Britain's most notorious criminals including Belmarsh, Pentonville and Franklin. Well, like Bronson. Like who are our most notorious criminals at this point? All of comic serving time at Belmarsh have included Charles Bronson. I don't want, I don't want Bronson getting dental care. Hasn't he knocked enough people Steve? He's made his views on teeth perfectly clear. Do Bronson go and get... Bronson actually hates going to the dentist. He's like terrified of the dentist, like smearing himself in shit to get away from the compulsory prison dentist. Yeah, and that...

Taken six hygienists hostage. I'm trying to take out his wisdom tooth, but he's very slippery. Greasing up your teeth before you go to the dentist. Including Charles Bronson, Abu Hamza and others. An inspection in June by HM's inspector of prison said of prison's dental provision that quote waiting times are good with most people getting initial assessment within seven days and ongoing treatments within a similar time frame. We found the one specific sliver of stuff in this country that works the way that it should do, right? Like

not even dentistry as a whole, just dentistry in prisons. And we're like, this must end. It must be shit. To be fair, it must have been jokes going to the dentist as Abu Hamza. Them just being like, you're not flossing it up and you're just lifting your arms up. Like, come on, mate, if you could, if you could being drawn, Malkovich into Abu Hamza for one day, I feel like you'd get a lot of good jokes out of it. I'm just dead for a whole day. That's what happens.

Is he dead? He's dead. Yeah, I think he's dead. Is he? Yeah. All right, pay. An HMP verne on the Isle of Portland in Dorset, which is the nickname Peto Alcatraz. Sorry.

Sorry. That's it. I'm going to take this again. I'm going to take this again. I'm going to take this again. Maybe endorse it. That's what they call it. I don't know. In HMP Verne on the Isle of Portland endorse it, which has the nickname Peto Alcatraz because

of housing hundreds of sex offenders and pedophiles, including Gary Glitter. Inmates were seen within just two weeks of requesting an appointment according to a report from an inspection in July. That is just Chris Morris. He just wrote that. Gary Glitter is so named because of his gleaming white teeth. Pito Alcatraz's dental services are outsourced to Time for Teeth. There's gotta be a better name than Pito Alcatraz.

Make them adopt that officially. Put it on the signs. Yeah, shock Alcatraz, but worse. Yeah, that's right Alcatraz, but worse. Yeah, that's right. It just goes to show that the British tabloid headline writing skill has atrophy because they're just saying stuff like Pedo Alcatraz. Like it's not even a pun. You could have had like HMP Pedoville or like... Not bad.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. There's gotta be something with wormwood scrub. The problem is it's ver... HMP verne is the one they're talking about specifically. That's monosyllabic hard headline pun. Sorry, this isn't even just all prisons, it's one prison. It's just nonce alcatraz.

But surely it would be logical that it would be easier to provide dental care to nonces once you've concentrated them all in one location on an island, it'll be easy to do the scheduling, right? Yeah, of course. It's like, look, nobody really knows about this outside the industry that they have a different kind of mouth and they need a specialist dentist. Let's use it as an example because what this article is basically arguing is, hey, your dentistry is terrible. You should rally for dentistry to be terrible for prisoners also. Yeah, literally.

Like a toothless mob should surround non-salcatras. But like, this is the thing you mentioned, part of the thing earlier was like, oh, they're not being asked to pay. And it's like, with what? Buttons? They get paid like, paying my dentist in cigarettes is a really good bit. But in like prison favors, like my dentist can have someone shanked thanks to me. I brought a bottle of prison wine for my dentist.

So I'm becoming increasingly like Soviet Union vibes. Prison dental care is commissioned by NHS England and outsourced to private providers, and the result is that the incentive for dentists is greater than standard NHS work with more flexible hours, better pay and fewer targets. Again, the argument is that it should be worse. And this is why I bring this up in my sort of 2005 reverie is that, you know, there are a number of reasons that you didn't see articles like this for the last sort of decade and a half.

Chiefly among them is that a paper like the Telegraph is a very partisan paper, so you don't see stuff like this usually. They were sitting on non-salcatras to protect Liz Truss. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they were sitting on it physically to keep everyone in. Yeah, like a bouncy castle. But just like that, and the moral panic about the yobbs being back as well, only this time we're on the side of the yobbs. We're pro-YARB now.

Issuing an ASBO to the Dutch. Yeah. Oh, those YARBS. Yeah, those YARBS. It's got to be one of the most fucked combinations of already bad vibes to be an Israeli football hooligan. It's like two shit tastes that taste worse together. Oh, fuck, it is 2005.

The Maccabees are back, but let me tell you, they've got very different fans this time. Very different vibes. Usually we're much better at fighting the fans of the under 13s. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, this is the thing, because I thought this, because someone, I saw a tweet someone did, because the Israeli government supposedly sent planes to evacuate the Maccabee Tel Aviv football fans from the Netherlands, which is quite funny. And then someone said, imagine if Britain did this for the, you know,

football, British football fans every time they got beaten up, it'd be the entire British Airways flight fleet in use. And I'm like, no, it wouldn't. We're the ones beating other people. I'm not having this kind of slander. We would be swatting the other teams. Yeah. We have some of the best jobs in the world. I remember Euro 2016 when our jobs were fighting the Russian jobs and universally people were like, this is a big matchup. You don't often see two sides at the top of their game like this. It might have just been the Euro football game, but it was the job world. It's very rare that the Russian football team plays well enough that they're admittedly

excellent yobs. Get to fight good enough yobs. It's a kind of yob mismatch, you know? Yeah, exactly. Shit football, good firm! It's just really, really funny, conceptually to me, to lose a fight so badly that you start it by the way to start and lose a fight so badly that your government has to evacuate you from the country well that your government has to evacuate you from the country and then like every mainstream

media organization is like well i hope you're happy the maccabee fans are crying on the way back to their country one of them they were were not crying, they were singing fuck the Arabs by the way, on their way back to their country, there is video footage of that. But there was also on Sky News, one guy who was like, yeah, the, you know, the, the, the Hamasniks of Amsterdam pulled down my pants and spanked me like a baby. So obviously I'm tremendously concerned. Renaming the New York Knicks the Hamas Knicks. Yeah, well hey, you know what, if the Democrats stay in charge in New York I'm sure that that

will happen. That feels like something Eric Adams would do by accident. Yeah, we're naming them the Hamas Knicks because we want, because they lose all the time. That's the Eric Adams logic. Yeah, so like it's been so, so surreal, right? Watching every news organization kick themselves into line over this because initially the reports were like, it seems like these like Maccabee, Tel Aviv fans are like starting fights and are then losing fights and they're getting the traditional reward for starting and losing a kind of football hooligan fight, which is getting chased out of the city. A military evacuation.

Exactly. And then, and then very suddenly that became like, this is the most terrifying manifestation of the new anti-Semitism ever conceived, possibly. And you know, this is, you know, these people being like hunted down in the streets merely for the crime of like attacking a taxi with a crowbar or whatever. I want to move on though past it being 2005 again. Kind of, it kind of is, you know? Yeah. Yabs, oil. Yabs, we're talking Yabs, we're talking oil. Can I start listening to AFI again?

Yeah, that's right. We're talking a late term labor government that never even did the sure start of the first. Unsure start, you might say. Yeah. But rather than continuing to talk directly about like Trump, Elon and so on, I wanted to give a few more examples. Some people talk about sure starts, I talk about sure finishes.

I've come to finish what Blair started. Master Chief Starmer, what are you going to do? Finish this fight. I'm giving the covenant back that bomb. In a reasonable way. Yeah, so rather than continue talking about Trump and Elon and so on though, I wanted to give a few examples from the UK I think that should hammer home what we talked about in the bonus episode just after the election. Because also, by the way,

I refuse to get further into the weeds about what the left should do to reach young men, because it's obvious why like, you know, liberal media outlets- Let me just, let me just pitch this to you. Four word solution. Non-Salkatraz suicide squad. Wait, like as a talk show? I feel like, actually, I think November you've accidentally hit on a bit that we have done before. Fuck! Which was, which was pedo suicide squad being sent into the beaches of Normandy. To end up on our most dangerous pedophiles.

Being allowed to redeem themselves by attacking the third right. But this is what we say, right? What liberal media outlets are very popular with these young men who were being told are sort of being lured to fascism by, you know, like some combination of Joe Rogan or, you know, whoever. Andrew Tate. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. What they have in common with like the lefty ones is that they're all very anti Democrat or anti labor, very anti establishment political parties. And you're always going to have a very difficult time getting someone. But it's like, so what? So are we. And if it's like, oh, well, they lift a lot of weights. So does Riley. Like this is a large man. I just talk about it less. You're both large men, right?

Riley is bigger. I'll give that to you. But speaking for something bigger, you're always going to have a difficult time getting someone to shill for something unpopular from a position of authority. If you delegate that to someone, it's just going to come off like, you know, hiring, like, get one of the, like, fourth-rate members of the Wu-Tang Clan to give a dare lecture. Like, obviously it's not going to work. Fourth-rate member of the Wu-Tang Clan is still pretty high up the pecking order though, to be fair. A 30-year age, you know?

Because speaking for people's material needs is not something that's ever going to be popular with someone with like, there's never going to be a kind of liberal Joe Rogan that's going to sheepdog people to like, the Labour and the Conservatives by like, by doing what, what do they think the appeal is, other than just these guys can do magic? It's called the Romanian. Okay. No, it's called. Oh shit.

What now? I believe now. Yeah. It's so funny. Like you say, people are never going to get excited for Kirstama or anyone who's like sort of, you know, uh, an ideologically permissible successor to Keir Starmer, and anyone who's like able to grab people with the kind of like justified hatred for institutions is never gonna then be able to be like, and the thing is now you gotta vote for them. As we saw.

Yeah, speaking for people's material needs is not ever gonna be popular with figures in establishment politics, because if it was, we wouldn't be raising this ludicrous question of can there be a liberal Count Dankula at all? Yeah, Count Wokeula. I want to learn your pronouns. Well, no, isn't Woke too far. It would have to be Count Reasonable Compromise. Count Libula. Count Libula. Yeah, I'm liberal Count Dankula.

I'm just doing the kombucha face here. Yeah. Count Labia. He's not going to hand back Castle Dracula, but he is going to do a stolen land acknowledgement. So this is at the same time, right? A new digital unit that will work with social media influencers and creators is being launched by number 10 in an effort to promote the government on TikTok and Instagram. In related news, I have a new job. Very excited.

Well, you're working for Morgan McSweeney, so can you ask him a few questions for me? Bevo's going to be theatrically swallowing some of Keir Starmer's policies on TikTok Live. It's going to be like rolling them up into little paper balls and going, see, no need to chew. It won't even be that current, right? It'll be ancient memes. We're going yeah exactly like Morgan Morgan McSweeney is gonna spend like a hundred million pounds to find out whether or not

Kirsten is demure and mindful to which the answer is no even older than that it's gonna be like we've written 2.5 percent more funding for the military on the front of this blue dress. And then you're just saying that Keir Starmer is going to do it for the Vine. Free shavakadoo. I'm going on Lily Allen's podcast. Road work ahead? Oh yes.

Thanks to our infrastructure program. There will be fewer potholes. We can't guarantee none. It's called the new media unit. An attempt to decide, set the Westminster bubble by finding those who don't watch or read newspapers or trust in institutions on the social media platforms that they use. We're aiming to find people who are completely cut off from society. People like in a sensory deprivation tank. I don't want people who can read.

I don't want people who can hear or see. I want people who are in a lying in brine listening to whale song. Those are the people. That's my demo. I think they mean people who don't read the papers. If you're reaching out to all these people who live off the grid and are participating in like hunted or whatever, if you're reaching out to all these people who have no engagement with traditional media and you're trying to get them on board with Keir Starmer's policies and concerns, which are all in response to that traditional media, it's just going to bounce off them because either those people don't give a fuck or they have their own interests, which are like completely fucking insane,

right? These are the people who are like traveling to crime scenes, concocting conspiracy theories about the like family members of someone who's disappeared. They're not gonna be like... I've looked at the metrics and we're not cutting through with the news agents pod to toddlers. We need to be... Look, these numbers are crazy. They're big into Winnie the Pooh. And God knows what that guy's politics are. I mean he's naked from the waist down. We've got to be cutting through to them. What can we do? They're not interested in the news. Put Winnie the Pooh in non-Zalkatrass. I love that this just doesn't even sound like Emily Maitlis. It's just...

No. It does sound... Completely inscrutable. Unless you watch a three-part Amazon original. It's like four hours. And it's not just people who are cut off from... It's people who like are maybe 20 to 25, who get most of their media from like Instagram reels and TikTok, right? Oh God. Jesus Christ.

And so as you said, number 10 is now thinking, okay, well, how do we reach these people? You know, we're, well, let's try and use influencers. Let's try and communicate in a new way, but let's try to put this old wine in this new bottles. And so it's to me, these questions are all the same question, which is how does a deeply unpopular political establishment keep on selling itself without changing any of the things that it cares about? Oh, by doing like a TikTok where you do an unboxing, but it's a red box.

That one's for free, Morgan Monswine, you can have that. Don't speak that into reality, please. You know what? I was joking earlier, but actually Ruth Wilson does have the Instagram Reels voice. Like, it's kind of like, hi, yeah, this is a day in the life of me. I live in an intentional community with 14 other chefs and we're hosting a supper club tonight. My job is the butter bean ragu. It's going to take 72 hours, but it's so great. And the umami is to die for.

Ruth Wilson also doesn't have that voice. She chose that voice. Yeah, she does the Instagram. Once she started doing it, it just stuck, you know? The wind changed. Look, I want to move on. The question is less like, can there be a leftist Joe Rogan so much as it is, can there be a Joe Rogan that is proudly pro-establishment? The answer is no. It's proudly because the answer is affect, right? Rogan is still very much on the side of one wing

of capital. Well, this is the thing, right? To be like, we need this new kind of left media that's gonna, you know, not be afraid to confront institutions. It's gonna be funny. It's gonna relate to young people. It's like, well, what you want is Charpo Trap House 10 years ago, right? And to then say, having like, systematically kicked them as far out of your politics as you can, we need those guys back. Not even those guys now, but like, those guys as they were ten years younger. It's just like- We have to rebuild them. Exactly. In the aggregate, you know?

We've gotta hunt Virgil Texas. We've gotta find him. And only when they said that he would appear when the kingdom was most in need. He's been preserved in amber. Another couple of items as well, right? Cause we... I meant for this to last five minutes before I got into these, I see we're going great. We talked a little bit last time about things getting worse and there being an- HURRIT DOWN, RYLY.

They talked last time about things getting worse and the inability of establishment elites to cycle themselves, meaning that those things getting worse never get confronted because the priorities of the elites never change. And you know, there are few statistics I have, a one news item regarding the water, and then I wanted to talk about Partygate weirdly. So prices, first of all. Headline findings from... I'm sighing because I'm about to say the next word.

KPMG's UK consumer pulse survey Oh kissing the penises of men brackets gay. Yeah. Yeah, I've been trying out the new range of pulse sex toys Yeah, I hope you're excited never to be able to say the name of like any Consultancy or like accounting firm ever again Riley. Oh god at least Deloitte's one word They call him jerking penises Morgan again, Riley. Oh god. At least Deloitte's one word. Unless you were saying... They call him Jerking Penises Morgan. Unless you can say, Deloitte touch of my lover. Who's the man?

Soaking off men is Deloitte-ful. Yeah, there we go. Okay, there we go. That's the only thing I could think of. You got an Accenture in there as well? Uhh... What's... Oh, these latex hotpants sure do Accenturate my cock and balls.

There we go. Yeah. These latex hotpants sure do Accenturate my cock and balls. I hope the other men like them. You have to be really specific. Just print the whole thing, yeah. Yeah Friends the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you could just be a straight guy who's misread women so bad Like I presume this is what like a guy he's his only inference is to what kind of men are sexy is taken from gay men So he's he's fully doing the light and you need a bull twink look. Yeah

This is our wall trying to attract straight women talking about what just talking about what like, Gruesome Gavin would do. By the way, if you're confused about, if you're listening to this and you're confused about your sexuality, and you're confused about why we're turning the names of accounting firms, consultancies, and banks immediately into gay sex stuff, that's from the previous episode that was on the Patreon. They should have to do that on Pride Month. They should change their name to the gay versions of their name that we have come up with. Yeah. It shouldn't be BCG. It should be blowing cocks brackets gay.

1201 AM, July the 1st. It just flips back. You know, it's like, I see what you did there. I find this whole like jerking penis Morgan thing to be kind of performative. You know, I don't know that it's really good ally shit. Yeah. I mean look, at jerking penis Morgan, it's all still white cis men. Wait, it should be jerking penis more gay actually. I feel like that's-

I'm really good, yeah. Yeah, it's all white cis gays who are in that boardroom who are all quite like conservative in other ways. And like I applaud them for changing their name to Jerking Penis Morkay this month. It's gesture politics, you know? And that gesture, you can imagine the gesture I was making. Yeah, of course.

So headline findings from Kissing the Penises of Men Gays UK Consumer Pulse Survey from the first quarter of 2024. I love this dynamic we have where you try and read something that is just relatively straight-lacedaced and then we give you brain parasites. That's right. This is what I signed up for. 52% of consumers say they've had to cut their non-essential spending. 3% have said they've been able to spend more on non-essentials. That 4 in 10 shoppers say they're buying more like own brand or value products. But my charts, my charts. Yeah. Well, this is basically people who are saying like, this is basically, you know, this is people saying like in the first quarter of 2024, consumer

sentiment was down, consumer spending was down, and in April, it's up since April, but not enormously. The vast majority of those people surveyed think that their situation wouldn't change in the next six months. And a lot of that recent recovery, the updated survey goes, has been driven by like, Klarna or the use of credit cards. Oh, fuck, that's grim. We are speedrunning new labour in the sense that we're back to like, payday loan companies as well. Yeah, yeah, we brought payday loan companies- Wanga's back in the room!

Wanga's back in the room, it's just wearing like, a sort of groucho glasses and called Klarna. Wanking off nubile gays assiduously. Yeah, but like, Wonga is now Klarma, Klarna, you know, likes are now flops. Yeah, again, not the same companies, but the same premise. No, no, no. Exactly. It's as exploitative to me as if it were a payday loan company.

And it doesn't even make money. We talked about shit like Klarlan and before it loses money, it's just, I don't know why it exists except to some kind of accidental price control. Well, they've made the mistake of not being quite as evil as wonga.com. So that's why they are failing to be profitable. You know what we need to bring back?

We need to bring back an old school money making scheme from the 2000s, like cash for gold. Remember that? Like peak financial prices. Just put all of your gold jewelry in this envelope and mail it off to us and then we'll send you cash back in the same envelope. The most, the most like open to thieves. It's fine. We use a, we use a very distinctive envelope and listen, this is going to be, this is going to do gangbusters in the Trump recession, which is coming. Well, the reason I talk about spending is that I think that spending is one of the things you can do to understand if, not just if your economy is good, but if your economy's goodness

is being felt by people. And going into the Starmer Reeves era, right? It wasn't good, obviously. It still doesn't seem to be good. And so I'm just going gonna be checking back in with that periodically to see if it gets better, right? Because more than anything else, more than any top line figure, what are the things that you can very easily say is if burger, or in our case if bangers and mash or fish and chips and paycheck is in the correct ratio, then people will be spending

money on it. However if it's not, then they will not. And then that is- This is how like a management game would give you a little, like, smiley face, to show that, you know, for people who don't want to read the graph that you're doing well. And recently, additionally, this is about Thames Water now, in spring this year, Elliott Management, a company that we've talked about a long time ago, so I don't expect you to remember. And they manage all the Elliott's out there. TS, Ness...

Spitzer, unfortunately. A $70 billion hedge fund known for investing in distressed assets has now targeted Britain's water industry. Oh, good. Oh, okay. Sure. So our raft is being circled by a big shark. A big helpful shark that's willing to help us lighten the raft by taking a bite out of it. Okay. So a lighter raft would float better. So Paul Singer's fund has basically been systematically buying debt from other investors who have been selling it at a discount because they're afraid that basically they're going to get fucked in a restructuring. And so Elliot, which is known as an activist investor, right?

They specifically go to find distressed assets. I think they tried to intervene in Twitter when Elon Musk was circling it as well. Oh wow, okay. So like the buyer of last resort after Elon. Yeah, so these guys like- What you're telling me is that Elon Musk could have bought Thames water to, you know, rip all the woke out of it. Yeah, finally found the cathedral.

It's in the pipes. So that a bit, basically they're a company that like invests in distressed assets then takes dramatic action on their, as board members with voting trusts of shares to then affect the different management direction from whatever company they're on. It was notorious for seizing an Argentine naval ship while it was sort of battling in the courts over... So, so quite literally, rats boarding a sinking ship.

Yes. They are some of like the prime examples of vulture capitalists fucking over Latin America by like buying and manipulating its debt prices. And now we're Latin America so congratulations to us I guess on having way better food and climates. Yeah, 1996 Venezuela we're back at it again. They call him El Starmo. Really really waiting to see who the British Hugo Chavez is going to be. I think that we could get a version of Peronism in Britain. Oh God.

Why are you going to make the Falklands Argentinian from the inside? We're just going to make the UK Peronists. Our plans are measured in centuries. So Thames Water, basically, the bondholders led by Elliott management are going to provide a loan for three billion pounds to the cash strapped utility says the FT, but the emergency loan will not come cheap on top of a near 10% annual interest rate. The Lembers will also pocket substantial fees and will gain a further windfall if Thames Water repays the loan ahead of its maturity schedule. So basically this is even more expensive

debt being saddled onto Thames water after it was saddled with debt initially by Macquarie, right? And that appears to be the best plan. You gotta stop saddling this fucking thing. It's like buckaroo. Yeah. That appears to largely be the best plan, right? Well, thank God it's not like a huge part of our critical order infrastructure.

And you know, everyone involved to say, oh no, this arrangement, this complex financing arrangement is not going to drive up prices because the new terms of debt extend the repayments further into the future. It drives up prices just later and also they're saying oh we're going to allow the like free up existing cash reserves which won't be tied up with with funding financing that debt to pay this debt and so on and so on. They're basically saying we're going to apply more financial engineering to Thames water. So again consumers are still not super comfortable.

Local councils still headed for bankruptcy in a pretty much industrial scale. Thames Water no closer to being saved and in fact being circled by even more sharks that the government is very eager to court. Right? It'd be really funny if this was like accelerationism from Stammer. He's like encouraging all of these people to lend Thames Water huge amounts of money that it can't pay back and then just let Thames Water go bankrupt and then be like well guess you lost all your money anyway we're nationalizing it now. That would be fun if he did that I agree. He's not gonna do that. I know that. It's just a fun thing to think about.

He doesn't have the sauce. I have a sauce, I have mayonnaise, bread sauce. I have Tingly Ted's. It's the Ed Sheeran hot sauce available in Little. Is there an Ed Sheeran hot sauce? Yeah. Oh my god. Ingle-y Ted. Yeah. Ingle-y Ted sounds like someone who'd be locked up at Nonce Alcatraz. Hahaha. Nonce branded hot sauce.

Look, I don't like the nonce-ies, but it is good. It goes well with chicken. So, the last thing I said I wanted to talk about was Party Gate. The news has taken us to 40 minutes because of all of our 06 dentistry chat, which is combined with this, what I'm about to say with what you know from the book about Morgan McSweeney and the Labour Party, where he was like, oh yeah, we basically like kind of, you know, clutch together a racism crisis out of some Facebook posts. And we more or less as party insiders did away with this method of popularly influencing

how high level politics would go. Remember that. This is an excerpt from Tim Shipman's book printed in the Times for the end of the Boris Johnson Premiership. On November 12th, 2020, Boris Johnson sat on a majority of 80 and was confidently pondering the prospects of 10 years in power. Well indeed. That evening, he and Dominic Cummings had an argument which had paved the way for the

chief advisor's departure from Downing Street the beginning of the end of the Premiership. Cummings believed that Kerry, who was then Johnson's girlfriend Cary Simons, and her allies were briefing against him and his team, telling Johnson, quote, you'd better get a grip on that or things are going to blow up out of your control. It's just middle school drama shit. Yes, I remember this. When we leave, your girlfriend is going to say a bunch of shit and I'm going to hold you personally responsible for what she says. You know what that means, don't you? Are you threatening me? said Johnson. Yes, I'm fucking threatening you, replied Cummings. This is great because it just makes Boris Johnson sound really dumb I am threatening you

No, sorry, just just can we just be completely clear because I sometimes I struggle to know when someone's Stretting me or not because you know sometimes when your wife says you can do that. It's fine Are you like yeah, but is it actually fine or you saying it's fine in a kind of daring me to do it way? So basically are you threatening me or not? We'll try to get so Cummings then gets fired and then it appears as revealed as like a fun Anecdote in this article by Tim Shipman that it turns out once again Cummings and his friends had been sitting on huge amounts of blackmail evidence of the parties for a very long time and then simply just told political journalists about it when it was convenient for them to do so and Then those political journalists simply printed what they were told. Right? So this goes on. The beneficiary of

the plot was Pippa Krerar, the political editor of The Mirror, who was a good choice. Months earlier, she'd been tipped off at the parties and began working on the story, but her source had not given her the information firsthand and she hadn't been able to stand it up to her satisfaction. She was primed when Cummings's ally played her a video. She was not allowed to take a copy, but is enough to give her the impetus to run the story. As 2021 became 2022, the mood in the Tory party was grim and Cummings predicted that the quote silent artillery of time would do for Johnson. But Cummings wasn't leaving the bombardment to chance by now. Lovecraft, isn't it? The silent artillery of time.

By now, openly telling journalists that he had quote a grid of potential stories designed to damage. One lady loyal to Johnson said they ran a very effective briefing campaign. It was deliberate, it was coordinated, but is also undemocratic and outside the rules of normal politics. Because the guy was elected, he was leader of the Conservative Party and he was Prime Minister. Once again, take all of these ingredients together, right? We knew that Partygate was like a fake scandal put together by conservative party insiders because Boris Johnson was embarrassing and had outlived his usefulness. And you know, we also know as well, who was the last actually popular politician in Britain to hold the prime ministerial office? Was Johnson?

He was the conservative leftist Joe Rogan. Yeah, he was. That was him. And so what you now have again is like these moments where elite control of their organizations slipped. Boris Johnson was never supposed to be in charge of the Conservative Party. He was their best bet. But from the insider's perspective, they never wanted him. The same thing with Jeremy Corbyn. Jeremy Corbyn was never supposed to be in charge of the Labour Party.

It was an accident. They changed the rules once and got it wrong. And then they had to deal with someone people actually liked, but who was inimical to them, for four years. The Conservatives, they couldn't really handle the fact that, like, they were broken by Brexit, they also couldn't handle beating Corbyn, without like, someone else who was also popular and well-liked. ALICE You have a Pyrrhic victory, and so you have to sort of submit to the leadership of your joke dumb friend.

Yeah. Well, exactly. Oh, fuck, we had to make Bunny Corcoran the leader of the Conservative party. He's just planned three more murders already, and they're all just of that elite waiters he doesn't like. This is why you have to subscribe to get the Left on Red episodes. Yeah, yeah. Henry Winter lost control. Take all that stuff together, right?

And what you have is a perfect example of what we talked about in the most recent bonus episode, how things like establishment political edifices falling to fucking pieces works. Right. It's not again, this is not to paint like someone like Trump or someone like Johnson is particularly anti-establishment. They are anti-establishment in a small way, which is they are anti the genteel world of elite managerial politics. They're certainly not anti-establishment in terms of what the wealthy want.

Yeah, they're capable of performing anti-establishment to voters and to the establishment themselves, they are an aesthetic irritant. MW- Yes, and they might be career threatening if you are from the managerial machines of those parties. AL- Yeah, in the same sense that it's probably very very annoying to be one of those groomed for power in every sense wasp freaks who used to be at the top of the Republican party, and who were turfed out for, like, whatever Floridian orthodontist Trump has put in.

Yeah. This guy is a great orthodontist, he used to work on pedophiles, it's true. But you know, that's what they say about pedophiles, they've got fantastic teeth, this guy, he worked at... he worked at pedoalcatraz. In the UK, am I saying that right? Pedoalcatraz. It's how Trump came to know Jeffrey Epstein was asking him about his dentistry. I wanted to talk about those things together because I keep thinking about that concept

of the point of, or at least the quote unquote point of, domestic electoral politics is to effectively mitigate the impact of the global trends in the economy on people's lives here. But the whole Thames Water situation is a perfect example of a conduit through which trends in the global economy can be actually magnified into impacting our lives here by say, allowing the whole business securitization of Thames Water and refusing to then take any further action to deal with it. And then you ask how do they stay in power without acting in that role when sort of that is the advertised role? Well, it's stuff like this. It is stuff like internal party control

that limits the options of who you're allowed to see. Even if like, yeah, the person being limited out by Partygate was a gigantic piece of shit who was not going to be really effectively mitigating the impacts of the global economy on the people who voted for him that well, right? But at least he was popular. At least he was someone people like, some people liked. He organized a party and people came to it. You know what I mean? Like he wasn't a loser.

But to talking about like these systems continuing to break down is going to produce more and more aberrant outcomes. I want to talk about one thing for the next like, 25 minutes. Heliospect genomics. ALICE Oh, that sounds not ominous at all. RILEY Yeah. ALICE Remember one of those monkeys escaped from the like, gene lab in South Carolina and for a second I was like, oh okay well it's over then, been nice being, you know,

alive? That was from a lab that sounded exactly like heliospect genomics. RILEY Yeah. It's the plot of like the new Call of Duty. They're gonna release AIDS too. We strive to improve human health and wellbeing through the advancement of genomic prediction by studying genetics, the genetics of disease, and behaviour. We want the good genes. You might call it something genics, good genics. Yeah, well genetics. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah. Yeah. We aim to make a positive impact in the medical

field and contribute to better health comes from people everywhere. Our mission is to find genetic variants associated with common diseases and psychological traits. We're committed to using our insights to help improve human health. Our chief scientist who moved to Argentina from Switzerland in the 1950s. Everyone involved is Danish. Oh, well, okay. I can see this voice is going to be coming out at certain points, but I'll leave it for now. Just, um, just, I want to real quick.

How many bell curves do they have on, like in their offices on whiteboards and stuff? We'll get to that. Okay. Then Mark has no history of eugenics programs anyway. So, unlocking the full potential of genetic data revolutionizing the field of personalized medicine. Our mission is to empower individuals and their families with knowledge about their genes to help them make informed decisions about their health and well-being. We believe that by unlocking the full potential of genetic- Opening up the thing it's like sorry you are British.

Yeah. Basically what I did, I did 23 and me and it was like, you're 100% like Britain and Ireland. And I was like, I don't know what I expected. Yeah. You can get one of those stickers from the supermarket. Yeah. British and Irish beef.

That's right. And when you're beefing with me, that's what you're beefing with. Further information, however, immersion video recordings made by campaign group Hope Not Hate, who are pretty effective when they do this. They're just annoying when they do anything else. It's, you know, the activism is fine. The messaging is annoying. Yes.

Which went undercover to investigate groups of academics and activists. The footage obtained by Hope Not Hate of Heliospect employees. The Hope Not Hate undercover agent briefing compound where they're like we're going to need you to do a Danish accent. All right now look at look at the sandwich looks like a regular sandwich no top that's crucial. Yeah that's like the inglorious bastard scene with the like counting to three but it's like they see him putting a top on his sandwich they're like you're not really Danish are you? Good and dark.. Yeah. No, I just looks like drywall. It's actually a kind of bread. It's made out of seeds or something.

The footage appears to show experimental genetic selection techniques being advertised to prospective parents. A Heliospect employee who has been helping the company recruit clients, outlined how couples can rank a hundred embryos based on quote, IQ and the other naughty traits everybody wants, including sex, height, obesity risk and propensity to mental illness. The what traits? Naughty traits followed by sex makes it sound like they're doing like eugenics for like kinks. Yeah.

Put this man on nonce alcatraz immediately. Whatever the Danish equivalent of that is. We can make your son be a piss guy If you like that a job is opened up. Yeah Genetically bill a burghine piss guy who's impervious to the effects of drinking piss for years Piss and piss is water He drinks piss and pisses water. He's like he has our system in reverse. He's a human like Bill Gates straw that purifies water.

I need your piss, your piss, your piss and your piss. I need your piss and your motorcycle. Yeah. Give me your piss and your vinegar. So the startup says its prediction tools were built using data provided by the UK Biobank, a taxpayer funded store of genetic material donated by half a million British volunteers. Raising hand, is this the same UK Biobank that I recently read about having its data compromised in that it was being given to a bunch of Nazis?

It's the same UK Biobank, yes. Wow, that's crazy. And so all of these guys who are like, at the behest of like well-funded American foundations looking to try and prove some kind of supposed link between intelligence and race? Those guys? Yes, and this appears to be a company that seems not one million miles away from them. In the sense of like, ideology, or in the sense of like, Kevin Bacon numbers. In the sense of ideology, Kevin Bacon numbers, and it's also everyone involved is Danish.

Oh, okay. That's reasonable, yeah. So ideology, Kevin Bacon numbers, and distance. There's no correlation between race and intelligence, there is a correlation between Danishness and fascism. You know that Kevin Bacon has to do eugenics now because he lost all of his money in the Bernie Madoff scheme. He doesn't believe in it, but it's very lucrative. Yeah. Kevin Bacon looking at the trade or map of Denmark's exports and being like, I

guess I got to move there. Yeah. Nominative determinism. Yeah. It's either moving there or doing EE ads. And I guess they never bred that out of me. It's like the only person who gets birthright to Denmark. We have to bring him home. Here's our boy. Kevin Bacon starting and losing a fight before confusedly getting like bagged by Danish secret agents. Royal Danish Air Force. We've got to get Kevin Bacon out of here. Smuggling him to Greenland and then on to Denmark. The company appears to have suggested to couples who use their service might expect the child,

on average, six IQ points smarter than the child they would have had through natural conception. This is... Oh, the only thing IQ measures is IQ. It's such a fucking sued thing to care about. Yeah, six points above the starting point, but unfortunately the child is still Danish. So... One issue is that genes linked to good parenting, which are passed on to children, also contribute

to academic outcomes. But these genes could benefit a child by helping provide a kind nurturing home environment rather than making them smarter directly. Anyway, I'm going to pay Heliospec Genomics to like find the most like ubermensch of these embryos that I'm getting IVF inserted. Yeah. And then as we saw from Elon Musk, right, you can make your based epic Chad kids, and then they just never talk to you because you're so obviously a freak who doesn't love them.

Like, it's just this, it's so much of this trad shit is like that, right? Where it's just like, these people love to have kids and then love to like perform raising kids. And then for some reason, when the kids grow up, they're're like, man that was crazy, I want out of this. Do you want to hear some environmental storytelling? Yeah, go on. Scrawled in blood on the outside of the office. Supporters of- it's gonna be a lot of blood, it's a long paragraph.

Supporters of polygenic screening of embryos often cite the success of animal breeding schemes as evidence for the potentially considerable benefits of trait selection. Look at the pug! But others note that pedigree programs often produce unexpected ride-along effects where one case in the 2010s, scientists bred super chickens after breeding successive generations of prolific egg layers, but the super chickens turned out to be incredibly aggressive. And when introduced into the farm yard environment, the flocks descended into disarray with some of the hens pecking each other to death.

You've got 20 foot high chickens and they're scared. They don't know why they're so big. They're bigger than Gary Barlow's son. Funnily enough, this same thing happened with cows. It was like a weird Nazi eugenics project, or pre-Nazi actually, to try and re-breed the aurochs, the like, ancestor of the. And in doing that, they made these gigantic, extremely aggressive cows that were not really like useful for any of the stuff you would want a cow for.

Yeah. Literally, yeah. Yeah, amazing. For Michael Christensen, Heliospec's Danish CEO said, "'Everyone can have all the children they want and have children that are disease-free, smart, and healthy. It's going to be great.'" Oh. "'Eventually, Christensen envisaged,' this is all from the same article, the children they want and have children that are disease free, smart and healthy. It's gonna be great." Uh huh.

Uh huh. Eventually, Christensen envisaged, this is all from the same article, the advent of lab grown eggs would allow couples to create embryos on an industrial scale from which an elite selection could be hand picked. I don't want to open up the fucking Skyrim character creator if I'm gonna have a kid, right? And be like, yeah, do I want to have like a sort of like a Breton kid or like a Nord? It's just like Breton where he's got the stripes. When contacted for comment, Heliospect said it would not condone industrial egg testing and it did not plan to offer testing for the dark triad of sociopath traits. Among the

scene from senior staff is academic Jonathan anomaly. No Controversy after discrete if anybody describes as liberal eugenics I think I think maybe I'm allowed to make fun of you for having a stupid chosen name without being a hypocrite if you're advancing Liberal eugenics, you know to to to bad taste the taste bad together liberal eugenics in many ways the Israeli football hooligan taste, the taste bad together. Liberal eugenics in many ways, the Israeli football hooligan of eugenics, you know, guy who has a beef with that because he's like, oh, it's ruining eugenics. Great jeans shit guy. Yeah. So this is not the only one with Denmark is that their football team isn't generally good enough for their eugenicists to come up against the really good in the other parts of the world. Recordings made by this by Hope Not Hate show members of a race science network discussing

UK biobank data they claim to have accessed. Clusually, this is different people now. Okay. A group of race science researchers is led by Emil Kierkegaard, a Danish blogger and publisher. We got to do something about this whole country. Figure out what's going on. Yeah.

Uh, yeah, so this is, remember, this is separate organizations that were investigated for use of biobank data. So he runs the Human Diversity Foundation. Topics of Kierkegaard's inquiries have included whether Black Americans earn less than Americans because of average intelligence difference, as well as comparing penis size, breast buttock preference by race, and- I just, why does it always come back to penis size? What is with these freaks?

It's always so psychosexual. I'm doing real science. I just want to measure black men's penises and see if they're bigger than my sissy white boy penis. It's normal. It's normal science that I'm doing. If you could all line up over there, I'll get the tape measure. And he has argued in favor of removing immigrants already settled in countries such as Denmark.

And you know, this is also where we tie that back in to contemporary politics. Pushing on an open door to be a eugenicist trying to deport people from Denmark, you know. This is also there, they're of course connected with Peter Thiel, which means therefore JD Vance. I mean, we want to talk about like the Gropers. Mr. Thiel, Mr. Vice President, the grippers is mr. Teal mr. Vice president I've I have my penis size study here for JD Vance looks up

You could need a bigger couch Holden where are we? Would hold him and really be looking for Inaudible gargling let me test test the penises, Nixon. I can do it for you. Eugenics also said, quote, if parents allowed it, they would be, quote, silly not to select against gayness. Wow. Okay. Good luck getting a job at KPMG. Only in one month of the year. Yeah. So look, this is another group of people who's personally connected to the incoming US administration. They're also like all of the Gropers who are going to be working in Kemi Badenok's office are also going to be connected with these people because they're all friends online.

Fucking Alex Broiswitz or whatever is also someone who's like, let's say, connected to some right wing ass of terrorism on the internet. Yeah, oh yeah. Like, of course, they're honest to God Nazi conspiracy theory. Not even theory, Nazi conspiracy worming its way even deeper into power. And it's like, great. These are some of the guys who seem to be providing arguments that they can use, right? And they're using even some of the same language language like dysgenics and remigration, right? You see these people, Trump and his surrogates are already talking about remigration.

I'm pretty sure we're gonna hear Kemi Badenoch talk about remigration in the next couple of years. And how long is it gonna be before they're starting to talk about how immigrants are, for example, bringing in dysgenic traits into the country? I don't think very long. So remember, get that pussy hat back on and hashtag resist. We're gonna build a really big cow. That's one the Democrats could never do.

Peter Thiel is not the only billionaire connected to the Human Diversity Foundation. Andrew Conroe founded his first internet business while studying mechanical engineering at Stanford, the dating website Adult Friendfinder. So the Adult Friendfinder guy... Everyone at Pido Alcatraz listening in going, what's that? It's just such a recurring arc, right, that if you had a business that did well out of the dot com boom and like cashed out, you are now some kind of fascist that last existed in like Julius Eveler's nightmares, you know? The founder of Adult Friendfinder said, my ultimate goal is not to accumulate wealth

or accolades, but to leave a positive impact on the world. Defined adult friends. Yeah. See, like, why are they all like that? It's like hearing that, like, the guy who made his millions on eHarmony is now a phalangist or something, or is like, you know, a follower of Gabrielle Denuncio thought. I think that ultimately is like, they didn't become like the Getty's is the issue. Like they didn't become like-

Generation of wealth is only a year that I've had these millions. Yeah. You got to get into images if you've got that kind of money. That's that's what the Getty's show. Yeah. You got to be taking pictures of Cherie Blair at the premiere of Ben 10 Alien Force. That's that's what you need to be's what you need to be archiving them. So, Andrew Conroe also gave money to a pet rehoming facility, an anti-immigration group

called the Center for Immigration Studies, Turning Point USA and others. Conroe said in a statement, he helped to fund the HDF project at the beginning, but now that it has deviated from its initial objective, which was free and nonpartisan academic research, he's going to be pulling his money from the racism study where they Google penis size. It was a penis too far for him. So, Conroe was unaware of Eric Ahrens, the other, the guy in charge of the Human Diversity Foundation, his ties with the organization, saying, in response to the information he provided, he has cut ties with the HDF, ceased his funding, and ordered an immediate review of the governance processes across all of his philanthropic activities to ensure such a situation doesn't arise again. You know, like

Turning Point USA, the organization that just repeats the stuff the HDF says. Oh, we accidentally, like, you know, had a guy who didn't hide his power level, right? And so we're going to make sure that that never happens again. And by that, I mean you finding out Yeah, and by the way, I say like the Trump talking about dysgenics and stuff. He called an interviewer last month We've got a lot of bad genes in our country right now. And so, you know So they're saying that could be a Mikhail Gorbachev quote from about 1985. Hey, good genes There's a real Levi's knockoffs a A candidate for reform was disavowed this summer after he was also discovered to have claimed, quote,

by importing loads of Sub-Zaharit Africans plus Muslims that interbreed, the IQ is in severe decline. I mean, that really is glass houses when you're an MP for reform. You don't want to be going on about IQ at a reform rally. So a wild event as well that happened. We'll sort of end on this. One evening last October, 90, this is from another article from the same investigation,

90 paying ticket holders arrived at the Little Ship, a sailing clubhouse on the Thames, for a YouTuber's lecture on the supposed genetic decline of Western civilization. Uh huh. Ah, the fascism being enacted by a YouTuber is too much. It's undignified. The YouTuber was called Edward Dutton, who only had like a hundred thousand subscribers on his channel. Whoa, hey, now hold on a second.

Let's not get, you know, let's not say only having a hundred thousand subscribers on your channel. If you're headlining the scientific racism event, surely you should get more. It's probably a good sign if that's their like best guy, you know? Known for diatribes and dysgenics, Dutton's recent videos included one titled quote, You're more related to a random white person than your half African child. And another he toured Clacton on Sea while wearing a cravat, describing it as quote, one of the most dysgenic towns in the UK.

Can we introduce this man to some yobbs? I mean, I fear the problem is that he knows too many yobbs already. Like essentially fascism is understandable as a cravat yobb alliance, right? Dutton of course said he never had a contract that the Human Diversity Foundation was only using its name to impress others. No, I was being a simp. That was the YouTuber. But also again, imagine you live in Clacton and you're just going to the shops

and you see some fucking pussy wearing a cravat calling your skull shape ugly. Awful. Just some of the most unappealing people. Dysgenic, you might say. Well, indeed. But first to address the room before the YouTuber was a young man with a short crop of light brown hair.

Quote, hello ladies and gentlemen, said Eric Ahrens. I work for the AFD party as a consultant. Uh huh. He talked about the universities. Quote, the universities used to be where Western European white society produced elites capable of exerting power. The organization I am working with is taking more concrete steps toward the establishment of such an elite. We've done so through media outreach, partly through talking to people on the ground, and partly through networking, which is taking place more behind the scenes. And while the party has distanced himself from Eric Averen's AFD saying, this guy's

too racist for us. Uh huh. Again, to be clear, not convincingly, but that doesn't matter. We're having a normal conference with a German man who has some theories about race who's been distanced from by the AF AfD, the German Nazi party. What you always have to go back to is, again, no, he's perfectly racist enough for them. It's just the way that AfD gets into power, just like the way all these other parties get into power, is by seeming like safe enough for enough right liberal voters to kind of get on board. Are they going to be liberal Joe Rogan?

Yeah. They need to be the new John Olgan. So the researcher for Hope Not Hate also was recording this speech at the little ship by posing as a would-be donor. Also present was this guy who was Matthew Frost, who's like a sort of turncoat to the racists, but it says between who had sort of snitched on them. Between October and November last year, Frost and Ahrens were filming film pitching plans for what they call a gentleman's club with members paying for networking and training courses. Penis inspection on the door, mandatory.

I'm sorry sir, but you know full well it's no bottoms in the club bar. The Winnie the Pooh club. Yeah, it's Pooh mode only in the members bar sir. Yeah, sorry, not tonight. Why? I have my pants off. We don't explain selection, not tonight. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha On his phone screen, to give an example, he pulled up a video of muscular young men punching each other in a field. This is what we want to build as well, he said. Yeah, can I just show you my vision for the perfect wide race, and then it's just the video of the English boys hitting each other with the folding lawn chair?

Look how they kiss each other on the lips. Look at the tender comradely feelings. This is what you could have. Do they know the history of the SS? He asked. They didn't have IQ tests and stuff like that. They had certain outward characteristics. The principle is the same. You take the elite. Yeah, and the SS were very elite. Did they win? In response to written questions, Avarin said the men in the training video were engaged in quote, peaceful and legal activities. And he had been suggesting week long retreats for character development among highly selected participants. Instead of the SS, he said he could just as well have referenced any other select inner

circle with high entry requirements as a historical example. It's just like the Boy Scouts, you know? It's like, you know, public schools. You know, non-fascists. Yeah. Non-sinister organizations. At random, when asked to pick an example of men having a fun time, I picked the SS. But in fairness, a lot of the time people in the SS were having a fun time.

And I don't think the fact that they also did some atrocities means that another group would not have sufficed. Oh, what? So just because I had a brain fart. Where your brain goes somewhere. My brain way. A brain journey. My brain way. A brain journey. My brain journey.

Is this like think tank nerd doing spurious genetic research using again UK biobank data? Is he going to become the like, you know, chancellor of Germany? Probably not. No, even though he says my vision is to one day run Germany in a Trump like fashion. It hasn't been drawn for a hundred years to run a populist movement in Germany centered around a person. Yeah German Trump is a powerful He says my vision is to finally have a personalist right-wing dictatorship in Germany. Finally, it's never been trying after yeah

The editor of the belt is a very he's a very sad guy. Yeah, it's you're making him too gay too gay This is like the ideas factory where you can see these already coming in because you know when when Keir Starmer has no plan to fix Thames water when citizens still don't have any money to spend on the stuff they want and when it seems very very clear that no any of those two main parties are basically just gonna put any kind of middle finger up to any sort of selectorate right? You know anyone who wants to be disturbing to that duopoly, whether that's duopoly here or in the States, or these sort of major party political systems of the other countries, guess what?

Either we have the ideas that, like, we've decided aren't allowed, which is have Thames Water work, it's like, no, we can't have Thames Water work, but what we can do is come up with new ways to say send them home, essentially. New and somehow more Reddit. Yes. I think that's all the time we have for today. I want to thank everyone for listening. Thank you for being a Patreon subscriber. Isn't this a free one? Yeah, well thank you for being a Patreon subscriber, if you were a Patreon subscriber.

In advance. To encourage you to do so. We assume that you all will be. Yes. Yeah, because you're like, well I need to find out why kissing the penises of men is gay. Uh-huh. So I better head on over to the Patreon. It's a joke that requires so much research.

Or the Gatreon. It's very rebranding it. No, only in June. Only in June. Pride month. Also to remind you, we have a live show end of November. 24th. The 24th.

Devin of Kill James Bond is gonna be there. Yeah, that's right. Not just like there, Devon will be on stage. Yeah, he'll be on stage. It's not in Devon, it is in November. Devon will be there, as will November. It's very simple. The animal.

It's in. Yeah, exactly. Oops. Now, November and Devon are going to be at the show in London in November. Meanwhile, there's going to be at the show in London in November. Meanwhile, there's going to be a show in Devon in November. Meanwhile, there's going to be a show of Calendars' greatest November pages in Devon. That's right.

Anyway, so the link for that will be in the description. We will hope to see you all there. The Devon NATO Phonetic Alphabet Club are celebrating November this week. There we go. Yeah, please see me on tour. I am in Bath and Bristol this week. There's still a few tickets left for those. And next week, I'm in Oxford, Liverpool and Manchester. Please do buy tickets to all of those because it helps

me not get yelled at by the people who run the venues. Thanks. Bye everyone. Bye. you