TRASHFUTURE - The Winter of Discontented Treat Lovers

Episode Date: September 14, 2021

This week, we’ve got a real doozy for you: a bad startup, some Labour kremlinology, and an examination of supply chain shortages in the UK because our government are some of the dumbest people to ever breathe air. Did you know that when your taxes go up to fund privatization and pocket-stuffing, that’s actually communism? You heard it here first. If you want access to our Patreon bonus episodes, early releases of free episodes, and powerful Discord server, sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/trashfuture If you’re in the UK and want to help Afghan refugees and internally displaced people, consider donating to Afghanaid: https://www.afghanaid.org.uk/ *WEB DESIGN ALERT* Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), Hussein (@HKesvani), Nate (@inthesedeserts), and Alice (@AliceAvizandum)

So, I was walking into the city today, the square mile, the city of London, that classic medieval tax haven. You were off to do some finances. Well, I was off to drop off a PCR test, because I just returned from my holiday. Oh, I had to do this also, too. Yeah. I did mine in Canningtown, much less glamorous. And I saw a sign that made me unbelievably furious.

Oh, good. Which was there was a little. Oysters overrated, says local man. It worse. Just like, you know, the little like pastries they put on poles, right? Pastries. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yes, that's right.

Welcome to the damn podcast. Little ashtrays they put on poles. Right. On the lamppost. Like, yes, yes. And over that ashtray was a sign that said, in the square mile, we bin our gum. Oh, that's a. I've seen that sign. That's an almost a Bromley borough council level of, like, sort of hectoring.

Heck, well, it's what I, it's what I find sort of just like this. Little Singapore in more ways than one. Here we, here we are in like the drug money laundering capital of the world. And there's a little sign that has the tone, has the condescending tone of a school marm to not litter around the drug money laundering capital of the world. Yeah, because otherwise you'll upset the money. Yeah. Can't be upsetting the money.

And the drug money is the best kind of money. They loaned it, to be honest with you. At least drugs are cool. That's right. People need drugs. I get it. I understand why organized crime has to step in. Where the government refuses to legalize the streets.

Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you see some gum on the streets, do some coke about it. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the trashy. I object. Welcome to the.

Don't upset the money. Yeah, we're there with. See, the money is very tired. Yeah. No, it's it's it's TF. It's it's us. It's Riley Allison, Milo. Yeah.

And in in the TF, no one else in the TF studio, we bin our gum. We do. No, it's been a lot. We've been our gum and we respect our bin men. We we cast our pods. We gum our bin men in this house. We believe love is love.

And men are respected. Yeah, we've been our gum. That's right. Also lives matter. Look, we're this is an important an important episode of TF because it's our annual tribute to 9-11. For all the celebrate for our annual tribute to 9-11. Yeah, we're recording this on September 11th,

but it's coming out on the 9th of November. Yeah, that's right. So look, for for our tribute to 9-11 this year, I want to talk about when I think Brendan O'Neill, because we did a Brendan the last bonus episode, but it didn't get captured on the recording. Yeah. But when Brendan O'Neill has didn't get captured on the record,

it was a room, Brendan. Oh, fucking hell. But that Brendan O'Neill has lapped you in terms of the ludicrousness of what he says. Amazing. You have been outpaced by events. So, Milo, it happens so often as the resident Brendan O'Neill whisperer on the show.

I want to just know what you're on. What your what's your take on Brendan O'Neill's article in Spike that suggests that 9-11 was an early form of wokeness? I mean, all I can say is that Brendan O'Neill is the most talented rider of his generation. That's true. No one no one has his level of power. Only only Trump can compare to Brendan's level of like chicanery.

Only Brendan O'Neill could come up with like the snowflake salafists, the trans Taliban. The thrust of the argument essentially is that because they didn't have the normal demands that terrorists have, like specifically to release prisoners or whatever, or like because they didn't have a set of material demands. Therefore, they were doing identity when you think about it. It's the ultimate form of identity politics.

Yeah, because it was directly encouraged by the US government as a plot to make world capital. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, they wanted to, you know, put rainbows on the police cars. So they had to do 9-11. That's right. They needed more police cars so they could get more rainbows on them. And so they were like, well, we're going to need to like militarize law enforcement.

That's going to require a huge amount of of a sort of a political will to kind of paranoia about the other. If we want to do the woke capital stuff. Yeah, George Bush wanted to turn the JP Morgan Fund run gay. And that's why he had to do 9-11. I hate when I'm in my plane and it's been hijacked and I'm sitting back in my suit listening to the hijackers over the intercom and they start giving me their pronouns.

And I'm just like, like, oh, geez. They just about got everyone through everyone on the plane's pronouns before they had to hit the tower. I can't believe that they've turned 9-11 woke, I say, as they press the nose cone of the 747 begins to collide with the offices of Cantor Fitzgerald. Yeah, awesome. It's so good. He's he's so great.

He genuinely he never ceases to impress me. This is the thing I think a lot of people have asked me about writing the Brendan only a lot of calls and how it's done. And the trick with Brendan is that you have to start off with like a fairly banal culture war premise. And then there has to be like a prestige, like a turn, a turn so so powerful, so deranged that only Brendan could do it. And this is the perfect example.

Well, it's so I think we have a policy. We've had a policy for years of never reading a Brendan O'Neill article on the show. And we're not going to read it as a segment. The ones that Brendan does come on and read for us. Well, yeah, because he reads them for us. We never read Brendan's words. Yeah, that's right. No. But I am going to read this now just because

just because it's so fantastic. Traying our like code of values that we all had carved onto that big stone. We got it really cheaply from outside labor party headquarters. Yeah, of course. Look, we have the same values. No, it's and this is directly something you could have written. Osama bin Laden's extinction, rebellion style declarations.

So good. So good. I think if Osama bin Laden was still alive, he might have become an extinction. Well, he was. He always talked about like he talked a lot about pollution because he didn't stop talking after he said after he lied and said Al-Qaeda did 9-11. He didn't stop talking

and he talked a lot about environmental issues and stuff. I could imagine like, yeah, just in the way that like everyone probably like their politics soften, you know, as they get older, I can imagine like Osama bin Laden just becoming like a lib in his old age. That famous Churchillian phrase, if you're not a member of Al-Qaeda when you're under 30, you have no heart. But if you're not a member of the CIA after 30, you have no brain. Then you're the same.

Then it's all the same person. Osama bin Laden was both. So he really is. I like the idea that the biggest problem with bin Laden doing the environmental statements is like, his father is so huge in construction. What a big hypocrite. So he says, bin Laden's XR style declarations, his imbibing of woke fears for the future of the planet initially appeared in Congress.

Woke fears for the future of the planet. Oh, guys, I've just heard that if the human race goes extinct, there won't be any pronouns anymore. He kills thousands of people, then worries about the deaths of thousands of people in a future climate catastrophe. Ah, yeah. The exact same number, in fact, making him a hypocrite. And yet the fact that in Al Qaeda was an environmentalist outfit,

as well as an Islamist one makes sense. I don't think those things were a laze. I don't think part of the deal of 9-Eleven was them being like, this is how we're going to prevent climate change. In common with global movements such as. Yeah, they were disrupting air travel. And to be fair, think of how many tons of CO2 that took out of the sky. And to be fair, also, making an agency-connected

Deutsche Bank subsidiary very rich from shorting airline stock immediately beforehand. They also, they have made air travel extremely annoying. If I have to say something against Al Qaeda, which I don't like to do, is that their legacy has been to make air travel extremely annoying. And also, you can't unfortunately check into any of those trades because all those servers were in building seven. Right, man. Rats.

Yeah. It says, in terms of content, the temptation of the green outlook to bin Laden seems to clearly have lied in what environmental environmentalism facilitates, an expression of disdain for contemporary society. Basically, it's like everyone is basically Al Qaeda. It's like a horseshoe theory, but from the spiked guys where everything that's not them

is Islamofascist communism and it's Al Qaeda and it's Hitler and it's Stalin. They're all holding hands. Yeah. Brendan O'Neill stands for square against the darkness. That's that's a fucking Ben Garrison cartoon. I want to see. Yeah. Come on, Ben, Hitler, Gaddafi, bin Laden, all just like doing a little ring

around here and a guy. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. That's so cool. And I just I read this and a Gatsby, all of them all together. Yeah. Katelyn Jenner. Man, that was 9-11. This is Katelyn Jenner, 9-11, that guy with her car.

Yeah, that's right. It's Cure Starmer, 9-11, that's a little bit. It's all 9-11. Everything's Al Qaeda. Yeah. Oh, God, just by the alpaca for some to live in here, what what better way to celebrate the 20th anniversary of 9-11 than to do the opposite of the Baudrillard thing of like 9-11 never happened.

It wasn't a real event. The only thing was like grand mythological narratives is to be like, no, everything is 9-11 and there is only 9-11. Thousands of 9-11s every day from now until the day you die. I think if I could be in John Malkovich into anyone, it would be Brendan O'Neill. I want to I want to. You want to psych him inside his brain. Yeah, 100 percent.

Absolutely. But Magic School Bus Tour of the inside of Brendan O'Neill's brain. Before we do that, I want the two of you to tell me, OK, what do you think 4 Motiv does 9-11? It's a company that illegally it is not. Do is not a company that is not 11. That would be an amazing court case. I was just contending that we have right to discovery on that.

Like, can they prove they don't do 9-11? Let's see if fucking emails, dude. Formative versus adult baby burping services limited in the high court. Yeah, great. Lord's Sumption. It is our reasonable belief that this company has done 9-11 at least four times. OK, so the first guess is what does formative do 9-11? Yeah, they do 9-11.

9-11. For I just live, I found her walking out until like a TED stage being like for thousands of years, humanity has had to suffer through analog 9-11s. Yeah, that's right. We're in this is basically what Osama bin Laden was. He was like a terrorist venture capitalist. Yeah, which is cool. So that means now they'd have to do it with less hijackers

because of like, you know, Japanese management philosophy. Just in time 9-11, yeah. What do you think you get an ISIS KP from? You know, first round funding is nothing nothing to laugh about. OK, so I certainly had some seed investors. Let's put it that way. The same people that were the investors in the Mujahideen oddly enough. It's like it's like it's also weirdly a lot of people

probably gave a lot of money to fucking solve back. Wait a minute, everything is 9-11. It's all the same people again. God damn it, Brendan, you were right. Just not the way you expected. ISIS is probably one of the more successful startups funded by Saudi money. I see a new standup bit sort of developing. Yeah.

No, formative. Myla, what do you think it does other than 9-11? Is it or do you just have 9-11 on the brain? Is it like an app that raises your children for you? No, no. OK, well, if that if the name doesn't help, then maybe their statement of values will. Great. Is it carved on a big stone? I wish it would be.

No, it was screamed to passengers over an intercom moments before. Al Qaeda stolen land acknowledgement over the intercom. We believe we're only successful as a team. We're a scrappy collaborative group that's open to challenging each other and believe in learning something new every day. I'm not hearing anything that Al Qaeda couldn't also have believed. OK, all right. Here's here's six more scrappy. Here's here. There's six values.

Work ethic. We look at each day as an opportunity to get better for our team, ourselves and our customers. Each day is an opportunity to do 9-11. Great ownership. We believe in each employee having one opportunity to do 9-11 a year. We believe in each employee having responsibility and accountability to deliver. OK, 9-11.

Yeah, each employee did certainly deliver. Look, 19 out of the 20 were pulling their weight. That one guy should have got up earlier. Well, it's the Flight 93. At the end of the agile sprint, they had to do their Reflections session, and it was an opportunity for them to learn and grow as an organization. Unfortunately, they attracted some regulatory barriers after that. Love to do the 9-11 wad.

Yeah, they got regulated out of existence. Keeping the small entrepreneurial organization. OK, curiosity. We look at each day as an opportunity to learn something new, not as an opportunity to prove what we already know. Yeah, like about the, you know, tensile strength of steel beams, for example. Compassion. We care how others feel around us

and we take the necessary time to understand the points of view. Well, that's not just their pronouns. Then that's not very al-Qaeda. Yeah, I'm sort of think these guys might not actually be either. Well, you'll have an opportunity to change your guess once I finish reading the values. Self-awareness. We know our strengths and weaknesses and aren't afraid to ask for help. Back to al-Qaeda.

Yeah, it's classic al-Qaeda shit. Integrity. We have the judgment to do the right thing, even when it's not in our own self-interest. It's pretty al-Qaeda. That is pretty al-Qaeda. Yeah. I mean, those 19, you know, you had to say they were part of something bigger. Yeah, exactly.

It wasn't about them. It was about the work that they do. So I'm going to go back to the guesses here, right? Formative. Before I read the first line, right? It's formative. F-O-R-M-O-T-I-V. Is it a driving thing?

No, no, nothing to do. It is something that you interact with purely online. It never ceases to amaze me the extent to which it's impossible to guess what these startups are. Like from everything they say about themselves and from their name, other than parts where they directly say, we do this, it's like you could not possibly guess. Yeah, it's because the technology industry is not real. Also, to say something you only interact with online to me,

that that's like 9-11. But also like all of my jobs. Yeah, true. Is it Lithuanian uniforms? It wasn't too long ago when most financial service transactions were done face to face. Is it like Zoom for your bank manager? Close. It's like, okay, whether you're applying for a new credit card, a mortgage, or a life insurance,

I should say this was given to me by Jathan from our friends at This Machine Kills. Well, you're applying for a new credit card, a mortgage, or listen to This Machine Kills, or a life insurance policy, you would likely sit down with an agent and fill out your application. Oh, it's not a Zoom thing, it's a fucking computer. You're talking to a chatbot that is going to tell you that you can't get life insurance. Close and more sinister. You're talking to a chatbot that can see you and can judge your gender and race and things.

You're talking to a smarter child, but he's been radicalized to Islam and is doing 9-11. Closer, Alice is closer. A what? You are being spied on by this thing. Oh, cool. The agent, like any good salesperson, was trained to read your body language and behavioral cues, but now that people fill in forms for financial services products online, Oh, no, it watches you while you fill out the form.

There it is. Oh, no. Oh, fuck, it's just the job interview phrenology thing again. But it doesn't use the camera. Oh, so if you... What does it use? Well, it looks... It's basically a key show project to tell.

Yo, do I move my mouse like an AGP? Satellite imagery. Alice, that's basically what it does. If you hover your cursor over the bot... If you're filling out a life insurance application and you write down that you smoke, like, I don't know, once a week, and then you... I was like twice a week, and then you delete it and say once a week, that makes your application suspicious.

Cool. Yeah. So basically it says this is what they call digital body language. This is the dumbest shit I've ever heard. And it's also not going to work. No one's ever clicked on the wrong thing. No, no one has ever paused hovering a cursor over the how many units of alcohol do you drink a week,

trying to remember what a unit of alcohol is. Yeah. Yeah. Then just clicking the bottom option on the list, which is I am British. You are instantly arrested. Assume the worst. Yeah. Oh, no.

It was a classic honey pie. Yes. But what if the agent was blindfolded? What if that? Uh, kinky. Ah, okay. Yeah. What if you're spanking the agent with this big paddle?

What if the agent's been a naughty little girl? Yeah. What if the agent's being tied up and pissed on? What then? Would you be interested in doing that to an agent? This form is weird. What if someone like me, for example, enjoyed being choked and gagged?

How would you feel about that? Just, just food for thought. You're taking a while to fill in that box. You think you might want to just come and fill in my box? Hey, what if you came and stamped on my balls? What about that? Trying to get that insurance. Insurance.

It would make the job of reading and reacting to your body language impossible. The digital transformation, DTX capitalized, has blindfolded companies by moving their face-to-face transactions online and most don't even realize it. In 2017, we said- No, no, it never worked. People could just lie to you. Like, it never worked.

What, do they, do they honestly think that like, if there was like a foolproof way as a salesperson, telling if someone was lying about something quite trivial that you wouldn't even feel nervous lying about, like how many units I'll call or whatever, like that, like the cops might not have tried that? Like, do they not think they're like... It's in 2017, we set out to solve this problem by creating formative.

So, it's formative, right? A digital behavioral intelligence platform that helps companies understand user intention like never before. Using our patented- Yeah, not at all. Using our patented digital polygraph. Um, we named it a thing but it doesn't work. Yeah.

Yeah, we, we named it after a thing that famously like railroad, railroads people into like- Using my fucking digital Orgon engine. Awesome. Would you be interested in getting into this digital Orgon engine with an insurance agent? The insurance agent being hooked out to the polygraph, but it just gives you electric shocks.

And being like, yeah. Oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, I'm eight feet tall. Ooh. We're able to analyze thousands of behavioral cues, reading someone's digital body language, information collected while they engage with a former application. Our AI models, so magic, digest this information and allows our customers to understand and optimize user experiences

while predicting and reducing all fraud in real time. So, the in-person customer, this is from a presentation, in-person customer, bullet point one, signs of confusion and frustration, you can assist applicant. Highly engaged or motivated, cross-sell the applicant. Nervousness or changing answers, investigate further. So, basically they're like, it's like, yeah, if someone's like really busting through the menus,

you should try to sell them some more things. Yeah. You know, maybe they'll bust through that then, you wouldn't have noticed it. Yeah, they're not just in a hurry. No, they're- Things they love applying for insurance. Yes, they love it. They want to get more stuff.

Yeah. Or if they're confused- Excuse me, daddy. If they're confused or frustrated because maybe- Also, what's the difference between someone who's confused and frustrated by answering all of these invasive questions about what you do for insurance

and someone who's nervously changing their answers? Don't worry, we'll definitely be able to tell. Yeah. So, the new digital customer- We've trained it on the sort of like mental corpus of 500 of America's like most impulsive and densest cops. Interestingly, every time I try to buy insurance, my computer just shoots a dog.

Weird. Very weird. I tried to buy insurance, then Steven Seagal busted down my house with a tank and ran over my dog. I was trying to buy pet insurance. Yeah. I was unfortunately too late. Ah, yet again.

Curse you, Formotive. You've 911ed my house with Steven Seagal. The new digital customer and then there's a picture- Do you think Steven Seagal driving that M-wrap through the wall followed dogs was like dog 911? Yeah. I think that was dog 911. Meaning Steven Seagal is dog al-qaeda.

I actually saw a 2016 Steven Seagal movie set in Srebrenica, which was supposed to stand in for New York. Called a dog 911. I know that I really get along with my girlfriend's father when we were on holiday with me and their family in early July, we stayed up. We were on holiday in August of 2001, planting a series of bombs around the foundations. When we were flying with John Ashcroft on holiday between July and October 2001, when he oddly switched to flying exclusively private for some reason

before going back to flying commercial, which he had done in the past, weird how that happened. It is weird how that happened. Yeah. We watched a lot of late period Steven Seagal movies. It was nice. But no, here's how they set, talk about the new digital customer. Signs of confusion or frustration, unknown.

Highly motivated, engaged, unknown. Nervousness or changing answers, unknown. And then they have a little image of a guy in a hoodie at a laptop, which means hack. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. Getting a hug from David Cameron. So basically, people on our team have watched the movie Hackers and taken notes. Formative predictive risk scoring helps underwriters determine

which applications they can see whether the text is being entered in the lead speak or not. Yeah. You can set. So one of the things you can do, for example, is basically you plug this bit of script into your form, right? And then a little dashboard appears on whatever you're, whoever's sort of doing like compliance or whatever for this. And then they'll get alerts when certain behaviors occur,

like if a user changes an answer on a form after receiving an insurance quote, which is always means you're lying. Yeah, of course. Yeah. And for example, it's eliminates costly medical non-disclosure or tobacco usage non-disclosure with real-time risk signals. So it can tell if you smoke based on how you click around a form. What if, what if I'm, you know, I'm trying to decide whether I'm going to smoke

or not depending on what the insurance form spits out? I've got the cigarette sat on the table. I'm like, right, do I want to do this or not? I want to see what the options are. But like the insurance like applications for this are relatively less evil. The problem is, I think, the inevitable creep out of things like, are you just like lying to your insurance company, which of course you are and you should. But like into other things, given how many forms we all fill out online now.

Yeah. What about the forms I fill out for my wife? Exactly. You know what it is? It's basically like, I really hate having to write this. And then you click, of course, I still love you. And she gets a little like a notification. It's the, in a world of extremely high stakes form filling,

which is a lot of how you interact with the state. Star Wars opening crawl text. But that's the, I think you're sort of have it bang on Alice, right? Which is that, which is that basically what we've done is we're trying to divine, sort of, we're trying to, because we just imagine, again, these sort of perfect, like liberal agents who are sort of utility maximizers and who just like to sort of give and receive information freely, blah, blah, blah. And you're trying to.

Fucking online information marketplace. You're trying to detail, right, based on the tea leaves on chicken to gizzards. You're trying to derive information about them from which you can make. It's the same thing with things like university examinations. When we've like been trying to do those remotely, there is no practical way to prevent people from cheating in a remotely done exam. And so the only answer in order to seem like you're doing something is this kind of like security theater where you try to like get a, you know, a computer that's running a magic

eight ball on it to interpret mouse clicks. And the thing is, right? It's more than just security theater, though, or just like, well, actually, it's not more than security theater. So I think that there's security theater isn't just fake security. It also randomly targets people with punitive measures, right? Because it has to be seen to. And I think so, like, if you're filling out like a home office form or whatever,

and they decide that you move the mouse like an overstayer, that can kind of railroad you into a lot of bad consequences. Basically, like an overstayer based on just some shit. But also they don't they only have to do that like, like a percentage of the time for everybody else to get the message that like, oh, I should be frightened when I fill out this form. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like, it's the just the little bits of control that you have over your life. Silicon Valley idiots are busy trying to take away. But by subjecting you to the live in the world of like paranoia with friend computer, who's really worried about like how fast you're typing. Yeah. So good. It's great. Oh, all right.

You want to talk about Britain a little bit? Oh, we keep talking about formative. I can go find some other stuff out about them. No, let's talk about the bad place. Yeah. Having just arrived back into Britain two days ago, I had been during during our holiday in Croatia, I'd been bitching to my girlfriend about like how annoying Eastern Europe is. And then when we got back as soon as we landed at Britain, there was like a parade of border force

guys trying to look hard at the customs thing with their like little their little handcuffs. And they all had like black gloves on like rubbing their knuckles like looking as you go through. And I was like, you know, I take back everything I said about Eastern Europe. Look at these fucking cunts. I've been terrible this country is like wannabe cops. What's worse than being a war imagine joining the fucking border force. Like you're too pussy to even be a fucking cop. You're going to be the suitcase.

The fucking passport cops. What the fuck, man? What the fuck is wrong with you? How little pussy do you have to get in your fucking life to join the fucking suitcase cops? I think the thing with border force is like you have to be unusually racist. Cruel and unusual. They used to be called the border agency. And then that wasn't hard enough.

So now they're the border force. Like a branch of the army and some ringers from Dave Courtney. Yeah, the bouncers and people with flat noses. Yeah, you're not coming in in those shoes. Britain adopts a door policy. Looking back. No, no, no bowls of water, mate. Sorry.

Well, well, well, what do we have here? All right. So I wanted this is sort of a long, a long discussion. Just a few bad enough sunshine. Things to do with how sort of Britain is going and its politics are going. Poorly. I wanted to start with this, which is young labor, the youth, youth wing of the Labour Party, which is sort of much more,

for those of you who don't know, is much more associated with its left. Yeah. Much, much like all young people are. Yeah. So the, and this is in the context right now, which we'll sort of talk about a little more later, of like the Tories tax raising themselves into the first minor poll lead in one poll by Starmer's Labour since ever.

And. Yeah. Keir Starmer's Labour playing the incredibly clever game of simply not being the Tory party. Yes. That is the extent of their policy is just like standing there and going like, well, we're not those guys. And they've only just figured this out after several months of being the Tory party.

What if we tried saying we weren't them? I don't know. So, but while this is sort of going on, right, the sort of, the focus of the sort of the, or at least the focus of sort of much of the bureaucratic machinery seems to be on trying to disaffiliate and punish anybody associated with young labour. Of course. This sort of only came to a head. They can only kick left.

So this all came to a head when Jess Barnard, who is the leader of young labour, basically received an email from a Labour disciplinary committee saying, you are officially under investigation for two tweets you've done saying that transphobia is that. Again. Well, it's because she nervously moved her cursor over the tweet button. But like again with the border force thing is like internal party disciplinary people, very much the wannabe cops vibe. It was there.

There was the email itself. I sort of, I remember reading it had this very hectoring tone saying, don't you regret your, again, referring to two tweets? One is an email. And what is the Facebook post? Awesome. Yeah. So clearly, but these are also very old, right?

So someone from Labour, the Politburo has essentially gone through her tweets from years ago, identified two that were critical of TERFs and then said, you're going to be under investigation for disciplinary processes now. Don't you regret this as though talking to a sort of strong child? In the Labour Party, we endorse our transphobia. Literally, that is true. This is what is awesome about the Labour right and about Britain in general, but this is a great example from the Labour right about how like in their unending quest

to get away from the rampant, a ducce Stalinism of Corbinism, they have managed to invent the NKVD. Like, would you like to recant this? We advise you to recant this. Otherwise, you're going to come with us to a basement and then no further. Well, it's what they've done is it's basically like, what if Beria was a double-digit IQ post, more or less, who's like really, you sort of, who's got basically wants to like turn the immense

power of the Labour Party's disciplinary board into a place he can sort of prosecute his moronic grievances. This happened the same morning that a Labour MP for Canterbury, Rosie Duffield, decided to log the fuck on and post several spicy tweets, essentially along the lines of, I support trans people's rights to live as they choose, except to use any female facilities, including toilets, prisons. They can't take you to prison, fuck, shit. Yeah, they made the prisons do woke.

Domestic violence, prison, fucking changing rooms, so like, yeah, and so this prompted a lot of control system resignations from the Labour Party, but none from people who like. Yeah, good, there should be more, you know, more of those. But I think, right, the thing, one of the things to sort of, I think, build to here, really, right, is that we all know that they will endlessly support Rosie Duffield, and they will endlessly try to find or invent reasons to try to, you know, remove the Jess Barnards, right?

That is just, that's part and parcel of who they are. Oh, because that's what doing politics. And what I found, and the other thing that this is also sort of regarding young Labour is, you might remember a few, a couple weeks ago, is that young Labour was putting on some like pro-Palestinian events at conference, which is coming up, and they're, and basically, Oliver Kamm, a Times journalist, insinuated that by sort of calling for, by supporting Palestinian, by engaging in solidarity with Palestinians, they were calling for the destruction of Israel, and therefore, his words, a second Holocaust.

That seems like a reasonable point of view. And the thing is right, it received no response from the leadership at all, because on this issue, they've decided that the opinion that anything that remotely looks like Palestinian solidarity is basically calling for a second Holocaust, and it means that, if you're going to, it means that you're going to basically leave your own youth wing of your party out to dry, when they're, again, a massive high-level journalist says this, because you're like, well, I guess we kind of have to believe that too, because all we can, because we paint ourselves in the corner of only, of just saying, well, what we're going to do is we're going to agree

with everything and apologize for everything. And so we're going to leave ourself no room. If you're going to say that to us, we're going to say, you're right, and we're sorry. Yes. And that's all they can do. Kistam has a busy day of like, I don't know, like five hours of like hanging out, doing bohemian growth stuff in front of a big statue of Neil Kinnock, and like another hour and a half of apologizing. Yeah. Well, because that's the thing. If anything you do that left wing, that's anti-Semitism,

because there have never been any left wing Jews, and we all know this to be, and it's not anti-Semitic to say that either. It's very important to point that out. So it says, number one, like this is where we are, right? This is where sort of our situation, not we as in the Labour Party, we as in the general sort of politics of the country. Unfortunately, we as people who live in Bremen. It feels like being like shackled to a dead moose that's just been kicked off a cliff. And you're just like, I don't fucking say. Just like everything, like as banal as even is to talk about Brexit, just everything is just like a non-ending. Just like, I see some other people

who live in the same country as me have decided to just fuck everything up once again. There's a song. There's a song I actually quite like by a producer called Clouds called Chained to a Dead Camel. So you should check that out. I guess that's what it sounds like. Yeah. That sounds like living in Britain. A lot of that. So one of the reasons to talk about this, right, is that there is probably going to be or at least a lot of predictions a mugs game. I'm not in it anymore, but there's this suggestion that there is an octopus has suggested that there will be an early election. Yep. He was hovering over the guess and know while he was doing that.

And so I'm going to put the marker down if there is one. I'm going to say you actually should do a lesser of two evils vote for any, for like just to reduce the share of the labor party in any way that you possibly can, because these people need to be shown how much they are detested by the people. This is not going to be an issue for listeners in Scotland for whom, you know, go ahead, throw your votes away. It doesn't matter. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And like, I actually worry about this, right? Is that they may because because like, because the Tories have done this sort of tax rise to pay for social care tax, of course, on people who work, obviously, not of course, anything else,

raising the marginal tax rate for graduates in Britain now with a student loan to like 50% over £27,000. That's what you're awesome. So you have a student loan tax rate tax. Yeah, exactly. And my worry, though, right, is that I feel the least funny outcome is that labor does like better than expected, right? And they can sort of that will number one sort of prove their odious point that's, you know, politics as elite consensus, which is seriousness is the only way that it should be done. They'll be in software. Like, we're not even talking about like, here's something like winning a majority or anything. We're just talking about like exceeding the polls.

Oh, a majority is impossible. But like completely getting a couple of points more in the polls more than expected at just the worst Twitter experience you'll ever have. And like the thing is, if you're going to do if you're going to do politics the way that they have fought tooth and nail to do it, right, which is the politics of retail politics, which is, well, we're not the other guy. Then I want to be the Democrats that all you can do is you can only rely on demographics. And I think there's there's one thing, right, that has there's one demographic trend that kind of is on their side, which is like, yeah, so Scotland gone. No, everyone hates in there.

17% I saw in one poll suffering from the effect the effects of Long Richard Leonard there. Right. And then like, but the fact is that the one thing they have on their side, right, the only the only thing that they can really bank on is that one Philips the unbridled charisma of Jess Phillips, the one thing they unleash her, unchain her, let her loose, feel her up and she will vanquish them. Yeah. Well, they think that the thing that they have going for them, right, is because they have did everything in their power to like denude themselves of anything other than elite consensus formation politics, just relying on people having a brand preference basically is London is London is like it's London's like a machine, right? It's it's sort of it

sucks young people like it. Yeah. London is a big machine that sucks you off. It's like it's like like a busier, you know, a house is a machine for living London is a machine for sucking you off. Young people from around the country just coming and just docking into the 25. It's just all all of this and then all that all flows into Western sector, the woman and coming to make like a new London right now to make a new camera getting sucked off by a Stokey entire country getting sucked off by London. Yes. Yeah. I think you could you make a little um, you know, like a guitars, a little sticker that says this machine kills fascists you want guitars have you want to stick it says this machine sucks you off.

I love that stick. I mean, I did and then have it on your guitar. I do see one benefit to this, which is I think a sticker that says this machine sucks you off. It's funny to put on almost any machine of any size. Oh, coffee maker. Fun. Yeah. Hilarious. The recorder. The recorder, the mixing deck. I'm looking at right now. Hilarious. A computer. Combine harvester. Hilarious. A camera. Hilarious. It's like somebody, I did a tweet the other week where someone posted a viral photo of that their parents had taped Diana's funeral and it had said like, do not tape over and then someone replied to my tweet about it and was like, how many times do you reckon they've

watched this since they recorded it? Any number is funny. Like anything from zero to infinity is a funny. But it gets funny. If the VCR has a little sticker on it that says this machine sucks you off. Yeah. Like bumper sticker on your car. On the car like Diana Dianne. Yeah, off this mortal coil. That's right. Getting sucked off this mortal coil. I had a point. Yeah. We should make distributing sell little stickers that say this machine sucks you off. Yeah. Exactly. That's the new TF. But it's just a t-shirt that says this machine sucks you off. It literally could be. Stickers cost nothing. We could make those. Oh, God. Okay. Free with every new trash feature t-shirt, a sticker that says this machine sucks you off. That would be very funny.

That's your like photos of machines you have stuck. We could get those ones that like, you know, the like the film ones that stick on car windows. Yeah. I want something with a really strong adhesive that you can just fucking slap on to anything. I want to see one on the side of a boat. I want to see one on the side of a tank. Perfect. I put it on a bus. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But what's the one thing you can't put it on and I can't believe I had a point to you. Yeah. Yeah. How funny it would be. Like a variety of differently sized stickers saying this machine will suck you off. It said London is a machine that sucks young people from around the country

out of towns throughout the country and spits them out into the Southeast. Oh, it doesn't. It doesn't fucking swallow rude. Which is basically like that. There are kind of some demographic trends that are in that are in the favor of a if your politics is going to do that. And basically what you have to do is just sit there as quietly as possible and wait for like this great demographic shift to happen in the Southeast. Same thing. Same reason why the sort of latest cohort of Redwall Tory MPs are all such fucking idiots is because neither party has bothered cultivating anybody there.

The same reason the Scottish Labour Party is like the best we could have done was Richard Leonard was because there's just an absolute charisma vacuum because anybody who had any talent or any like affinity for anything just immediately got sucked off by the machine. All well in the heart of the machine. Very well indeed. Very, very well. Old best DC. What sort of prompts me to sort of think about this, right, is that because there is this tax rise of about 1.25% national insurance, it's going to pay for extra NHS procedures for the next three years.

Which is good. More tax. Yeah, fine, whatever. Yeah. Just tax someone else. I do not mind paying more tax. Yeah, I'm like sort of neither here nor there. I think like, look, it's the I'm neither here nor there about it. I like good public services. I'm willing to pay for them. That's fine. I would make someone else pay. Because I have zero faith even if I pay this new tax that it will actually provide good services because we're not capable of doing those anymore.

Oh, God, no. No, no, no. Because like it's even just go to some fucking. Yeah, like Serco or like fucking G4S. Yeah. Well, it's just to do a little bit of detail of what's gone on here, especially for American listeners, is that NHS, as you know, funded all this. And then social care is like if you have dementia, or if you're if you need home care and so on, it's so wildly residualized that basically like you can get free social care from your council if you have like assets of a quit, more or less. Yeah.

Yeah, that's more or less it like you mostly can't get it. And so the government has basically said, okay, we're going to cap lifetime social care spending at like 85,000 pounds. And then once you spend over that, then the government will sort of step in and pay for the rest of it until your life until the end of your life or until you don't need social care anymore. And this has much of what this has meant, right, is that this has led to like huge catastrophes for the NHS because basically like the sort of broad social service provider of last resort is the NHS. And like they can't release someone out of out of a bed if they don't have a reasonably good place

to go. And so the NHS ends up and instead of being a medical service provider, just ends up being this sort of big net that does sort of lots of different things, right? Which is partly by design, because you know, on a theoretical basis, a lot of these people want it to fail. Yeah. And so they're basically right that and so that's where we are, right? So this is going to have not a care service necessarily, but the state will step in and sort of, you know, pay for it. But Riley, you hear me say, as leftists, we love the state doing stuff. This is a left wing project, surely. Boris Johnson is now a Marxist. Isn't that the case? Well, just the problem. This is absolutely the case where such incredible sort of brain spurts,

such as Matthew Parris, have basically said, Britain is now taking a sharp turn to the left under Boris. I said, the corporate night dream of a big state and worker power is coming true while the rights global Britain has. Socialism is when the government does things and the more things it does, the more socialism it is. It doesn't matter, right? That like these are the same people who are going to plunge like, you know, thousands if not, you know, thousands and thousands and thousands of families into poverty by just cutting universal credit. These are also the people who are like, yeah, they're capping social care costs, but then like still when they start paying for it, they're probably going to be paying, as you said, Alice, like Richard Branson.

Yeah. And also not to be like poor graduates with student loans to pay back, you know, us. You know, only the top 1% should ever have to pay tax ever. Although it's quite fun to say that. Like it's also the case that like part of the reason why all of that, you know, fucking student debt accrues in the first place is because of fucking tuition fees. And also having crashed the economy, nobody can get a job unless it's podcasting. Yeah, that's right. And I mean, again, like we're not sort of our our political media ecosystem is almost uniquely ill equipped to handle this by looking at just like, but because I think what the Matthew Parris of the world has done is they've confused a vaguely functional state

with one that is essentially a socialist character. Because they've been that sort of capitalist realism, right? Capitalism is when nothing works and socialism is when like some stuff works. And there's this, there's this whole thing, right? There's this freak out of now is like, Oh, where have the real conservatives gone? Have we finally got do we finally have the kind of national conservative that's been sort of predicted for, you know, eons as the thing that sort of squares the ideological circle of why all these sort of ostensible free marketeers suddenly love the government so much, right? And it's like, ah, the red wall sort of won't love this or whatever, because they or that the red wall will will like this or so on and so on.

They're sort of trying to read those tea leaves again of like, who will care about what sort of tax rise where and it's like, number one, the red wall, it's, it's an illusion. It's all made up. I don't know. I don't know if Matthew Parris was shaken as a baby or something, but it would be implied by his level of analysis. Where do you get off being like, Oh, what's up? Now the Tories are left wing. It's just like, mate, like pre-Pattel is home secretary. You just, is that, is that glancing off your fucking brain? They think that they're economically left wing, but culturally right wing. Yeah. And columnists love that. And they're half right. Columns love that because it allows them to square this circle, right? It allows them to square a

circle where they have to explain the phenomena of the last five years. And when they want to, they want to sort of do that by without sort of, you know, updating any of their priors. And broadly, the phenomena of the last five years are capitalism collapsing to such an extent that occasionally the state has to do the bare minimum. Like for ideological reasons, it does the least it can possibly get away with to try and kick the can down the road. But every time it does, somebody goes, some like Matthew Parris leans out of a window and goes, you just kicked that can. That's fucking socialism. Matthew, Matthew Parris with a brain, the sort of consistency of a half chewed Farley's rusk soaked in milk sat at his desk, typing using his

entire palms, the attempt to bring some order into global events, which he has not understood not only for the last five years, but I would wager for his entire fucking life. Matthew Parris, you stupid fucking cunt. Shut the fuck up for the rest of your fucking life. I'm feeling quite shaken by that, Myla. I was hoping you'd be stoked. Right. So this is, let me say, it's that they need to set the square of the circle because they have this conception of what politics is, which is, well, politics is when people do things, there is no, this is just people sort of inventing programs than executing them. There's sort of no

broader view, say, of why things are the way they are. They just sort of take them as read and then try to explain them by sort of looking at personalities. And that's how you get to sort of the attempts to like try to divine this sort of working to man. It's also the same thing that liberals do with like, is this credit card my friend kind of thing? It's like a relentless commitment to never doing anything in the slightest bit materialist. So all you... Your credit card can be your friend if you take enough PCP. So all you do is personalities. So you end up with like girl boss Pelosi or whatever. And so what's in this whole sort of, this question sort of, oh, is the Tories becoming

socialist? It's that, well, what we really have now is we've got like, yeah, we're paying sort of, we're increasingly, right? Yeah, we are paying like European level taxes for American style public services. It's the worst of both worlds. Yeah. Delicious. That's a compromise, baby. And I mean, in responding to this, when he's not a busy sort of trying to like disaffiliate young labor from labor, the labor right by a Starmer, as said, well, he's going to oppose the tax rise because it's on working people. He thinks that the money should come from wealth and so on, which is great. Fine. Yeah. That is probably, if we were asking this very narrow question of how should this be done? This is probably what I would agree with. But

then now Starmer's coming out and saying we should have a wealth tax, but there's no program that it fits into. He's never said anything like that before. He's not a program guy. Not even at the sort of middle band level of carving a bunch of shit onto a rock. This is fully like just a triumph of labor factionalism and right factionalism. So of course, they don't have a plan. Of course, they don't have a program because that's sort of inimical to their whole project, which was Corbin out, salt the earth, raise every building to the ground. And at any cost, any cost, the left has to be beaten back down interior focus group room day. Kia Starmer's earpiece is buzzing. Kia, everything you've said so far is losing them.

You're crashing in the polls. You've got to do something. Kia Starmer, you can see the cocks wearing in his mind. He's had a flash of brilliance. He turns the chair backwards. He sits down. He looks bas-gaz directly in the eye and says, I don't welcome what the Prime Minister has said. Landslide 600-seat victory. Shot of Jon Snow coming as the entire board turns red on election night. Jeremy Vine is swung off of his feet. It's like trying to ask the Labour Party now to have a set... Because the thing is, if you're committed to not having a program, because your whole thing is, if you have a program, then that's not doing what the voters want because the voters voted for the other program. Yeah, you've got to

be the Tories because that's what they want. If your politics is to never do that, then when the Tories fuck up, which they do because they hate governing and do something sort of unpopular, then you have zero things. It's like the Romans trying to appoint a mayor of Carthage after the punitive court. It's also like... Carthage is now burned and insulted. Why bother having a mayor? The good news is, this is a very long cycle. Time was a flat circle. Eventually, at some point, the Labour Party may end up back in government. Because of the machine? Yes, because they invented the machine that sucks off young people from around the country, yes, which of course would be tremendously popular. Now, at some point, at some point,

there may be another Labour government. It may well be a right-wing Labour government. Again, with... It'll be Blairism again, which is part of what the Labour Party sort of institutionally has believed itself to be for, is to wait for the Tories to fuck up for the thousandth time and for that to be enough to coast over into government and then use all of that sort of goodwill that you've accumulated in order to start a multi-generational foreign policy disaster that alienates all of your voters. Are you suggesting that Britain unwisely entering into the European rate mechanism caused the Iraq war? I'm also suggesting that Prime Minister Stammer is going to get us to occupy fucking Zambia

or somewhere just for old times sake. Well, because it's like... Can't Stammer in a pith helmet? Yeah. Well, I think it's like... They love that shit. Even in government for fucking 15 years, they tried their absolute hardest to incinerate every last piece of their own credibility. It's like prestigeing, right? You level up to the maximum, and then you've got to start over in order to get those gold weapons skins.

Well, I think the other thing is that one thing that's sort of unsurprising is that you know what they're not talking about, right? They're sort of... The Tories do something, and he responds generally, supportively, but in this case, sort of critically, what no one seems to be doing is talking about the fact that shortages, because I know we've talked about that recently, but I think it's important to basically be thinking about that all the time. No one seems to be doing that. He told you it would get worse, and it got worse.

Should have listened to Uncle Trash. Your Uncle Trash future who has an HGV license but refuses to drive. Yeah. Well, it's that the... Dude, I do something about an annunciation. Food and drink federation, boss. And the food and drink federation, by the way, a literal trade body for... Food and drink grocery stores. Yeah, they're from the Phantom Menace, those guys.

Yeah, those guys. It basically said, yep, the UK is now going to experience permanent shortages. And I mean, the thing is, I think they should be taking the... Bro, did you just use the word permanent? Yes. Oh, that's not a good kind of shortage. No, we would prefer a transitory one, I think. That's a bad... Hang on, what was that about a trans shortage?

Yeah, there's not enough of them. Yeah. They could keep you them all in Europe. So, and I get this... The glory full of pussy is stuck in the alley. Anything that food and drink federation... Anything that food and drink federation, boss, says about their own industry, as a lobbyist for industry, basically,

should be taking with an enormous grain of salt. Because I think mostly what he's doing is basically sort of campaigning, trying to scare people into making the government... Trying to scare the government into like doing like Elizabethan press gangs, but for HGV drivers. Yes, yeah. You know, there's a sense, I think, in which like, because they don't... Because they don't want to pay lorry drivers more,

they will do anything in their power to not pay lorry drivers more. And the government doesn't want to tax them less. So, that's the battle of wills. Exactly. And, but nevertheless, right? Like, the fact is, like, the shortages are happening and are getting worse. And it's because the just-in-time supply chain system... Which is great and has never gone wrong.

Permanently fucked, and there is nothing there with which you can build a new set of supply chains. It has no elasticity. There's nothing built into it that can absorb any kind of shortages. Stuff by the like, you know, it's feast and famine, right? Stuff backs up on one end and you get like oversupplies, and you end up with farms having to like dump milk or like slaughter pigs or whatever. But, and then shortage on the other end. This was like basically every day when I bothered to show up to lectures at business school,

was them patronizingly saying something like, the most genius system ever devised just-in-time supply chains, because nothing is wasted. And then me just being like, hi, uh, first-time listener and first-time caller. Isn't that really stupid? Yeah, like it saves money in like a perfect frictionless world, but also in reality, what happens is it just goes wrong like every fucking day,

and then you lose money. And then they're like, shut up. It's Japanese. The Japanese have never been wrong. When have the Japanese ever done anything bad? I'm listening. Come on, then. Four hours later.

Okay, but apart from that... It's partly right. We've talked about this when we had our episode with Alex Gags in just-in-time, right? Where like, it doesn't just mean do less, but Western businesses sure have interpreted it that way. But when you kind of down tools the entire supply chain, except for like two guys, so it's cheaper,

there's like, it's very hard to like rebuild post-world, because it's post-World War II that most of this infrastructure gets done, because everything is very mobilized still. And you can do that. Or same thing with the New Deal was a political response to something sort of, to a massive economic crisis. Any kind of holistic response, because what we're seeing is like, the problem, as we've identified, what this Food and Drink Federation guy said is that like,

the UK shopper and consumer could have previously expected any product they want to be on the shelf or in the restaurant all the time. And that's going to be over and it's not coming back. That's, you know, that makes sense, right? Same thing with like, you know, you're not going to be able in like a reasonable society to be able to buy and have delivered, you know, your, I don't know, ship's anchor or box of sex dildos or whatever, the next day. Oh, not the sex dildos.

They're going to be stuck with regular dildos. That's right. But like, we're not replacing the sort of demise of that unsustainable system with a sustainable system, where for instance, you could get, you know, fewer things, but like more sustainably, or it takes longer. Instead, what we're getting is another unsustainable system that's worse and less predictable. So if I could sort of try it by way of sort of summarizing, right? I think what we're sort of ending up with is sort of European levels of taxation,

American levels of public service provision, and Soviet levels of like product choice. Great. And like, like 1945 Germany levels of product delivery. Great. Oh, I hate this fucking country so much. It's such a joke. It's just so fucking stupid. It's just every day I wake up in this country and I'm just like, what, what now?

What fucking now? Like America is like crueler and like more like, it's a higher stakes thing. And it's like, it's more fucked in lots of ways, but at least it's not as much of a fucking joke. You know what I mean? Like every day in Britain, it's like, oh yeah, we've run out of Marmite because my cousin Johnny, who was fed carnation milk as a baby and only has like half a brain full of black water, like a fucking Habsburg, got put in charge of all of the lorry drivers for some reason and decided to pay them in peanuts.

No, not metaphorically, actual peanuts. And now just like, yeah, there's no stuff. Sorry. Yeah. Season four, baby. Britain isn't real. Yeah, it's, it's, it's that. If the thinking about the long arc of sort of season three to season four,

season one and two didn't have arcs. We're still figuring out what it was we did, but that. Now that this is a premium quality podcast. Now that this is the TF executive experience. You're all in the lounge with us. No, none of these people are in the lounge. Oh, okay. The lounge is something we talk about with guests off.

No, don't talk about off mic. We talk about an odd mic. Yeah. None of you are in the lounge. But we're in it off mic. Yeah. No. So the, that much of the kind of way that the, that sort of like productivity was handled,

right, was through storytelling was fiction. Because that's like, for example, that's a lot of what credit is, is you're telling a story about what you're going to do in the future. And if someone believes, if a rich person believes you, then they enable you to do that. And the percentage of time that the loan performs is, were you telling the truth or something like it? Yeah, which they tell by how you move your cursor over the phone.

And I think it, and that logic, right, the sort of trying to manage, trying to create and manage our sort of short-term future expectations. And just sort of, and do that in a very ethereal way, right? So much work now is purely communicative. Because there's, it's not, and much of the stuff that much, and much of the actual stuff just isn't getting done. It's not even getting done by robots. It's just not getting done.

And we, and what happened is that sort of bumbled along sort of with a sort of, you might say, it's contradiction sort of heightening and heightening and heightening, and things getting worse and worse and worse. And the burden of all of these expectations sort of getting bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. And the last sort of two years has been the undoing of all of that. I mean, the great and powerful laws has been revealed. And it turns out that none of this really was ever functional. The buttons were never connected to anything.

The steering wheel was never plugged. The phone was never plugged in, right? Yeah. That's why whenever I picked it up, it just went, move. Yeah. And like on some level, like the individual causes of the shortages don't matter, right? Like, because it could have been anything, it was going to happen sooner or later, because they're, you know, it's a very like, you know, insecure system.

But there was one thing that I wanted to fill out, which is that like, aside from the obvious reasons why this supply crisis might have happened, you know, like Brexit, COVID, tax, there was one other. Supermarket 9-11. There was one other one, British people are unpleasant to work for. This is genuinely not a joke. I found a Financial Times interview where they interviewed a lot of like, HGV drivers who had worked in the UK and decided not to again.

And I'd like to like read three short paragraphs from this for you. Please do, Alice. Please do. Gabor said that the shortage of drivers and problems trying to find a flight back to Hungary because of pandemic restrictions effectively meant his final shift in the UK lasted three months with only the mandatory minimum breaks. He was never off work for more than 45 hours. At the height of the pandemic that meant his lorries cab was his home.

The final straw came when a policeman ordered him back into his truck citing lockdown restrictions. I was not even allowed to take a walk at the end of my shift, he said, with a bad back and a family waiting in Hungary. Gabor decided he had had enough. And they talked to another guy. They bullied us while drivers kept coming. Kovac said, now they are begging us. I will never go back.

I like England. It's a great country. I will take my family there one day, but to work the way they treat people never again. Oh, Jesus. I'm not not fucking pigeons coming home to Rooster. The fucking consequences of my own actions. Well, well, well. Well, well, well.

The woke Eastern European lorry drivers committing 9-11 on the streets of the British people. Nearly for being routinely disrespected and humiliated in atrocious working conditions. You're just, you're fuck. Just fuck. Great. It's pretty good. Yeah.

Oh, Britain's not real. Anyway, I'm, I'm, I'm tired. It's time for me to move on to shuffle off this old dusty and get sucked off. Oh, yeah. We all have to go back into the machine. Yeah. It's time to go stand around the M25 and sort of, you know, get sucked off so that the Tories can build a giant statue to mow off.

I can get sucked off by the machine that sucks you off because my dick is so long. It stretches from Glasgow. Yeah. The big sucking off machine. Yeah, it's, it's, it's prehensile. Like a little costume. This follows the course of the M8 downwards. Alice tried to get her dick removed, but actually it just accidentally just stretched it.

Ah, if anything, it's bigger. Yeah. Curse you, Britain. Alice is, Alice is in that Danish kids cartoon now. All right. All right. It's time for, it's time for us to, you know, remember when the Danes made that cartoon for children about a man with a 10 foot long penis?

Truly, I do not. Goodbye, everyone. That was basically the, uh, that was the inspiration for the Hannes Vonk, uh, not, or Yarp Van Hoot or whatever it was, the other guy from the Glockheads who said, not pornography, just starring children. That's disgusting. Pornography for children, which is educational. Yarp Van Hoot.

Yarp 10 Hoot, that was the guy's name. What, when do you think, what do you think we're going to have another Glockheads record re-emerge? Soon. We've got one, we've got one in the works. I just need to, just we've not, Nate and I have been ships passing in the night recently, but I think this week we're going to be working on it. Well, this week you're going to be finding it. I think is what you mean.

Oh yeah. We're going to be in the warehouse going through all the old boxes of tapes, seeing what shows up, going, using our long prehensile digs to sort through all the old eight tracks. You know what? Gross. That's really gross. Use a short prehensile dig. The, uh, just before, yeah, like a robin would have.

Yeah, exactly. Just before we go though, I did notice that tomorrow's political cartoon in the telegraph is a Boris dressed like Lenin and the words conservatives written with a hammer and sickle in place of the CFT. We will be sending a cease and desist in relation to our Soviet Union, but shit, an expensive t-shirt. I took fucking psychic damage from that. Well, time for me to go take psychic damage elsewhere. Don't forget, we have a Patreon, subscribe to it.

Five bucks a month, second episode a week. It's got pretty good deal. And, uh, yeah, that's it. Unlike your national insurance, it's not going up. Yeah, that's right. So yeah, that's, that's it. See you later, everybody. Bye.