Triforce! - Dream Homes | Triforce #367

Episode Date: September 30, 2026

Triforce! Episode 367! What are our perfect dream homes (and how much money did the Home Alone's McCallister have!?), Pyrion went to see the loudest band in the world (Jiluka) and Lewis struggles to keep up with Sips and Flax talking about classic 80s bands. Also, sorry, but we gotta talk about Trump again. Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickax. Hi everyone. Lewis here from the money pit. Hi everyone. Hi everyone. Hi everyone. I live in a box on the side of the road. Hi everyone.

Please help me. I feel like I'm getting to hate the house that I live in. It's like it's almost like it's almost you're in the process of really truly making it your own. There's such a lot of upheaval that it's kind of making me not want to deal with it and then Even when people aren't here, I kind of am resenting my abusive partner that is the house. Yes. I know it keeps me warm, and I know I'm lucky not to, I'm very lucky to have a nice house and a roof of my head and all this. But at the same time, I can't help but think like, oh, I was a nice city set in a flat in the middle of Bristol.

I had a lovely time there. I didn't have to do anything. Anything went wrong. I just called my landlord, you know, now. Yeah. When there's a leak or when there's, you know, a stain or weird smell. That's my weird smell. What does that mean?

You stink? He's causing the, he's always caused the smells, but now he's. It's my problem. He's got to hold him as well. Yeah. There's lots of weird smells going on when you have your old house and you're like, is that mold or is that like just damp or is that just the way it is now? Or is that?

Have you ever, have you tried going outside and just kind of slapping the side? of the house just to check to see that it's not going anywhere sort of thing, you know, like I see. I feel like if I do that, it might fall over. Yeah. Yeah. That's always the risk. Yeah. You're in the middle of doing this. I'll go. Will it go anywhere test and then it does go somewhere. I love that. Like a cartoon. Yeah. And I'm just there patting on a wall and the rest of the house is a big pile of rubble. Yeah. No, I had a plumber come over and tell me yesterday that something was immediately dangerous or immediately unsafe, something like that. He used some terminology that means that apparently he said,

if I say that to someone and they don't get it fixed, I can call the police and they'll have to come and get it fixed or whatever. So I'm saying, oh, okay. You have to call the police. The roofers basically have been fixing this, took down this cracked chimney, right? It was really leaking a lot. And the chimney flew inside it.

Oh, I love the way flew. of the felt. Flu spelt. Flu spelt. On the roof. It's a great word. The chimney flu. Flu.

And so, yes, it's apparently, if I ever use that, if I ever use my oil boiler again, it will cause their flu to heat up and then the felt will, might catch fire. Might catch fire. So unlikely. But I don't want to burn the house down. And so we've decided we're not going to use the oil boiler at all until we get the new heat pumps installed. And then the guy told me yesterday. that's not going to have until November.

Well, yeah. What do you think it's going to happen? So I've got no central heating for... Snap a finger and it's going to be done. Geez. Exactly. Exactly. It's got...

It's booked up. So that's fun, isn't it? That's something I'm going to have to find out how to deal with. Yes. Maybe just... Or maybe I just hide in the office for two months. Maybe I live there, set a little tent in the office in the middle. We can film it.

We could do like a kind of Big Brother style, you know, Lewis, now lives in the office. Yeah, do like a Clarkson's farm sort of thing. You could get somebody following you around and just recording your every move. But he doesn't do any of the work unlike Clarkson. This would be this would be Lulu in his house calling people and then avoiding them from the sounds of it. Yeah, well, that's what Clarkson does as well, though. He just calls people all the time.

But he goes out there. He's got his well, he's on and complains about cakes. Yeah, just because it's just because it's being filmed, though. Like if the cameras weren't there, he wouldn't bother with him. So if the cameras were there, Lulu's up on that roof is what you're saying. Yes, yeah, he'll be up there. Being the guy doing the directions and the complaining is a job all of its own. It is.

Yeah. Do you mean? It's called managing. He's a real manager. I don't know. It's quite an important job, actually. Yeah, I'm sure the managers would tell you that, for sure. Fucking dicks.

They never do anything. Well, you have to be the overseer. If you don't, I've learned recently, and this is something to take away. Overseer is the term they used for the guys with the whips on the plantations. On the plantations, yeah. That's overseer. Yeah, or in Fallout volts. Or in Fallout volts, yeah.

You did use that term in fallout volts as well. The overseer. The thing is, like, what I've learned is if you don't take active direction, give active direction every day to these guys who are doing stuff, they will just use their own initiative and usually do something wrong. Yeah, I see. No offense to them, because they are mostly doing things correctly. Get up there and tell them.

A lot of time. I'd love this conversation to take place on the roof. It's mostly the internal decoration stuff. Well, no, that's true. They're like, sometimes they don't want to bother you, but say you want to be bothered. And it's worth just having a little meetup every morning

and be like, what's happening today? Okay, this is going to be, no, it's going to be this color. No, it's going to be this. You know what I mean? And so just fixing those last minute and looking at what they did yesterday, be like, okay, this is finished, blah, blah, blah. that you have to kind of as you go keep track of the project very actively. And it's turned me into something that I hated.

I hate being like a busybody, like someone who is really anal about stuff and really on it. But if you don't do that, if you're not really thorough, you just don't end up with what you wanted at all. No. You know, because they can't read your mind. No. And even if you tell them and write it down, they will still lose the thing you wrote down and forget the thing you told them. So, you know, it's like you have to, you have to like be this really annoying person. Really, I feel like I've never been so naggy and particular about things.

You know, it's, it's come down to the point where, you know, like we've had to replace, we're replacing some like a flat window with like a Velix one. And I have basically had to order it myself to ensure that they got the right one. Right. And stuff like this, you know, it's been very. Well, they actually did order it in the end. But do you know what I mean? Like, it's very, like, it's very particular.

It's just tough. I'm not sure I'm enjoying any of this process. No, it's not. When it's all done, though, it's, I don't think it's meant to be enjoyable. I think I enjoy it when I play, like, the game version. Right. Yeah. I enjoy, like, the house flipper.

But you can turn that off. You don't live inside the house flipper house. That's the other concern. No, if I did, fuck me. Yeah. Oh, it would be a nightmare. One guy coming in and out all the time. Just like.

making a shower appear out of thin air. Oh, that would be beautiful. But no, it's, it's enough. I feel like the other big dread is for me is the, just how much more there is to do. Yes. It's like nothing is ever even close to being. Once you start doing stuff, everything chains on to it as well.

So you think, I'm just going to do this. And then you end up doing five or six different things. And it takes a lot longer than you expect it as well. Yeah. And I think sometimes it's good to just like finish a couple of things and then have a break and then come back. Like if we did it all again, I think I would have spaced it out a little bit more rather than just like had it all done at the same time. But then it's a tough one to judge because when you've got guys in doing stuff, there's some momentum, right? So you can be like, all right, you know, like can we do this like when you're done sort of thing?

and they're usually like, because they're already on site, they'll be like, yeah, yeah, we'll do that rather than having to like drag them away from their next big job to work on something else. So it's like, I don't know. It can be if you're using the same people. I should have just moved in somewhere that was done. And I'm obviously genuinely, but there is a better. There's a cost to that, right?

Obviously. Yeah. But there's a sort of, this is an element of, of, um, doing. it yourself and making it the way you want it and all this. But I don't really have that good taste anyway. I mean, I don't know if any of the stuff I'm actually doing is going to actually be the right thing at all. Yeah. It's a weird one. But like some, some of it is stuff that you want to do so that you don't have to come back to it in like, you know, two, three, five years time or whatever. Like, you know, if you're getting something done to your boiler or something done

to your heating or whatever, that that's going to set your house up for like, you know, 30 years or whatever. Yeah. Rather than keeping the old system and then just having to do it eventually anyway, you know what I mean? If you guys were designing a house to live in right now, you don't have to be there for the actual construction. You design it all out on paper.

You can get an architect to make sure it's all, you know, correct and everything. What is the foundation for your design? What is the basis? Are you building a giant pole with a tower on top that is, a thousand stories in the air? Are you building underground? Are you building a mansion? What is your, what would be your Barbie dream house? This is what I want my house to look like, design. I'm happy with my house now. Like, uh, imagine you're not. I don't feel like I... Let's actually try and have a conversation instead of just, yes, my house is fine. This is,

you can, it can be... My house is the best house. All right. Lewis. Sips were just basically carbon copies. Well, look, the only house I could really really think of is the Frank Lloyd Wright's falling water energy, right? Where it's surrounded by nature. It's kind of modern looking. It does look nice. I do like the look of that house. It's 50 years old when he designed it, but it still has like, it kind of inspired.

I would want that house from Man versus B. Did you ever see that? Man versus B? Yes. The house that he sits in. Man versus B. That's, that's, what is this? This looks like it's got Mr. Bean in.

Yes, it does have Mr. Bean in. Good God. Do you watch this? Unfortunately, yes. You saw this. He basically smashes up the whole house in order to get the bean. Right, you're coming at it from, you're coming at it from an angle, not, I wouldn't expect from you.

I didn't, I didn't switch on Netflix and decide that, yes, that's my shirt. show I'm going to watch that. How did you end up watching it? I have three quite young kids. There's a political dynamic in this house. So your young kids saw Rowan Atkinson, a man who was old as fuck, and they thought, oh, God, we desperately want to watch a show with that old man in. You're honestly laying this at the feet of your children. I'm surprised.

You're surprised by this. My kids would never want to watch this shit. Look at it. It looks like something for old people. Well, your kids are like teenagers. Yes. They wouldn't want to watch like, I don't think they would ever want to watch them. My kids, my kids like live action Mr. Bean.

They watch the animated Mr. Bean. Oh, they like Mr. Bean. So when they saw that Mr. Bean was going to be in something else, they were like, yeah, let's watch that. And I'm not sure that anybody really liked it that much, but we did watch it. It's a series. Yeah. Well, it's a, it's a weird one, though, because it's like 12 episodes long, what the episodes

are like five minutes long each. So it could have just been like, you know, a movie, a short movie, or, you know, it could have just been like a two-parter movie. But they decided to stretch it out into like an eight-part series that, and like the episodes are like 10 minutes long or something. Does he still do that? Oh, or does he talk like that? No, he's a normal person. Like, I see. There's another one. There's not just man versus B. There's also man versus baby, which we watched as well. I guess we didn't learn our lesson after men versus B. Well, man versus baby, as you can imagine, it follows the same thing.

He's a house sitter for like wealthy people. So when these people leave, go out of town, they want somebody to stay at their house and look after their dog and, you know, look after their precious artifacts and all this stuff. But then like Lewis said, in the B one, he can't capture the B. ends up trash in the house. And then in the baby one, the baby one, the baby just goes missing like all the time. And he can never find the baby just like ends up hiding like in all these weird places. And it's a, it's a weird one. Anyway, but the locations that he stays at are like, like, uh, like the house in in man versus B is just this like incredibly modern mansion. And then

the, the one in man versus baby, he's staying in like this insane penthouse apartment. in London. So, like, the locations are kind of wild, but the rest of the show is just not so wild, you know? I see. No, but that's, I mean, you might remind me of the Home Alone house, I guess. Yeah, the Home Alone house was a, was a huge one as well. When you watch that movie now, these houses, these people are so rich. Oh, my God.

Yeah, that house is just enormous. You're like, yeah, there's a, I mean, it's, it's just like, it's just like, you. I mean, it's just like, it's a real house somewhere. I can't remember where it is, but like it is so... He built it in a gym, didn't they? Picture. I think the inside they did. That's the internal set.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but the outside of the house is, I'm pretty sure, like, in Chicago or Boston or something like that. I mean, do you know what the other thing is, is they took how many 11 kids on holiday and all those adults, all those flights to Paris? And this was back before flying was cheap. Yeah. They would have had to put them up in a series of hotels.

These people are multi-millionaires. I don't care if they lose a kid. Let the kid get killed and the house get robbed. Fuck them. Yeah, because you had you had Kevin McAllister's family, which is quite big on its own. But then you had the uncle and the aunt who also had a whole bunch of kids. And wasn't there another, wasn't there like some grandparents in there too or something? There was so many people, though.

They needed three of those huge vans to take everybody to the airport when they, when they, when they were all. older kids, weren't there? There were older kids. And did they have the older kids count the little kids? Let me see how many... God damn, I can't believe we'll go through how many kids were... I wonder how much was a flight from... How much...

That came out in 91, right? How much... 1990. ...was a flight from Chicago to Paris in 1991. So the average domestic airfare was... airfare was 500 bucks, 500 and 1,500 bucks. Yeah. So the, this is according to the AI results.

So this could be absolute dog shit. Economy fair tickets from US and Europe were about 1,500 dollars round trip. In the AI overview, it has the home alone estimate. Calculations for the 15 ticket family trip in the movie, 11 economy, first, four first class round trips from Chicago to Paris estimated The total airfare cost around 35,000 bucks. They could have just chartered a plane for that, for all of them, right? Yeah, that's mad. They would have been better off just chartering their own plane.

You know, you know, in Temple of Doom? You know, the movie Temple of Doom? You know, after Indy has the fight in the nightclub at the start, and then he flies to Nepal or wherever he's flying to. The fight in the nightclub is where he needs the vial, right? He's going to die unless he has the antidote. Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. And the diamond is skidded across the floor, and he uses that giant gong because of course there's loads of gongs in China that's how they roll. My friend Ken, he's Chinese. He always says that the things you can look for for sort of signs that this movie

is basically subtly racist towards Asians is that first of all, a gong sounds pretty much any time an Asian character appears on screen. If you watch old movies from the 70s and stuff, that's such a common theme. And there's just certain music and beards and everything's kind of mystical.

That kind of. Like when they go into a Chinese restaurant on that place. Exactly. Or there's one of those guys with those long mustaches in like a white sort of. And they're always up to no good. You know what I mean? And it's a white guy dressed as an Asian guy. It's not even like an actual Asian actor that old man.

It's just like a load of prosthetics on his face to make him look. Lewis, what happened? It's a certain incredibly racist way. The quality of your call just jumped to 80%. I don't know. It's very of its time, isn't it? that. It definitely, but it persisted longer than you realized.

Lewis? Lewis? Oh, shit. I've lost you. I'm back. The quality sounds so much better, but then. So here's what happened. You were talking, the quality of your call from our perspective jumped 80%.

It was like you were on a regular mic. But you couldn't hear us. So there's a payoff. If your transmission is good, you're, you're, you're, uh, reception must be very poor. I don't know what happened. You couldn't hear us, but he sounded great. That was good.

That was funny. Maybe the mic I'm using on this is... Oh, he sounds better now, too. You actually do sound a lot better. Oh, God, it's all over the place. Just for the record, Lewis is on his phone. Lewis is on his phone. I'm recording on my phone.

Because it's just so loud in there, and I can't come into the office because my partner's gone home to her parents because you can't handle all of this banging and crashing and disruption. And it's not going to stop. I think it's a big strain. I said to her yesterday, if we can get through this, we can get through anything. And she looks at me and she's like,

I don't think we can get through this. Oh, my God. Oh, man. I'm sorry to hear that. Well, anyway, the flight I wanted to talk about was the flight that Indy takes. He's just on a plane with a couple of lads, and there's loads of chickens and stuff.

And any time I think about a bad flight, like with a lousy airline, I always think of that plane. But I would love to be on a plane with a bunch of chickens. It's going to be so much more entertaining. You just talk to the chickens. I don't think it would wear thin almost immediately, though.

I think you'd get on and you'd be like, this is going to be great. And then you realize like two seconds after you take off, this is not going to be great. They're probably going insane once you get into the air with the pressure change and everything. Like, I don't think they're just, they're just chilling and you're just having a cuddle with them. No, they're freaking out and pooping everywhere. They're probably fucking going mental up there, like the whole time. squawking and fighting and shitting and, you know, all the things that animals do, especially when they're like under a bit of stress or whatever. I think it would be a nightmare. I wouldn't want

to be on, I wouldn't want to be on playing with a bunch of animals. Imagine what it was like on Doa's arc. Oh my God. That would have been a fucking disaster. Yeah. It would have been great. I mean, it was it was built in the first place to to avoid a disaster, but in and of itself, it is a disaster as well. Like Lewis just rightly said, I wouldn't want to be on that thing with all those different animals. Like, geez, it'd be like Drama Central. You don't like animals? I love animals.

Yeah. No, I do love animals. I just don't want to be stuck on a plane with them or on a boat with them. I mean, I like people and I don't want to be stuck on a plane or a boat with most people either. So your ideal house would have no animals and only your family can access it. Like a secure vault. My ideal house would not be a plane or a boat that I was stuck on with people and animals with nowhere to go.

That's fair. I would like there was a... You almost sound like your ideal house would be a plane or a boat. Well, no. So there's an E&M Banks novel. It's a sci-fi novel. I can't remember the exact name. Someone will know it.

And they go to visit this guy. He's incredibly rich. And he has a moving house. Right. It's like a continual party house that just drifts around. I can't remember if it goes by sea or if it's in the atmosphere, I can't remember. But that would be pretty cool. Because you could just get off, you know, your neighborhood changes all the time.

You can experience new stuff. People can come and stay. You'd be like, hey, our home, it's huge, by the way. It's going to be mooring off the coast of Japan for the next month. I guess there's like some of those like, you know, like Gabe's yacht and Mark Zuckerberg's yacht, those are just gigantic moving. houses basically, aren't there? There's no, you only have people on there that you want on there, like, you know, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your friends and

family is close. Basically, going on a nice cruise, sounds great. But if you actually owned the house that, that you had to move around the world, it would be a nightmare. You'd have to, all the, so first of all, it's floating, which is a, a lot of upkeep, you know, look at the old USS Lincoln. That was only out there for you. I didn't say it was floating. I didn't say it was floating. I said it might be flying. I said it might be flying. Yeah.

It's more important. Okay, no, sure. You've convinced me. And it can go into space. Oh, right. Okay. I'm amazed I can hear anything this morning, actually, because I went to a gig last night.

Nice. With my eldest, we went to see a band called Jiluca. Jaluka. You didn't watch a man to say. Oh, look at this fucking Joluka. J-I-L-U-K-A. Do that, Jaluka.

Is this going to be another one of those recommendations where everyone in the comments is like, I listen to this music and I hated it. I'm not saying I recommend them. I'm saying my son likes them. I'm saying that these guys. Japanese band. Yeah, and they're all fellas, by the way.

I thought there were a couple of ladies snuck in here. It's very... Joluka is a Japanese visual K-metal band. K-metal, yeah. So it's kind of, there's some fan-boy stuff going on. here, if you're into that, and they're sort of very androgynous and very cool, and they've got all cool costumes and stuff. They have the loudest band I have ever seen in my life.

Really? They asked, dude, they were so loud. It was insane how loud they were, to the point where we got, we got, so we got there. It was it the O2 in Angel in North London. And we got there and there's like, the downstairs bit. First of all, I was worried they changed this venue to be bigger, but it's not. It's quite a tight venue, so it's good. You get to properly see the band.

There's like a balcony upstairs that I thought was going to be for VIPs, but it was open. So we just went up there and right at the front, there's two chairs and we're like, shall we sit here? We sat down, no one told us to move. Thank God, because they had an hour of support and then they were over an hour. My legs wouldn't take it. I'm too old and tired to stand and watch a band I don't really enjoy.

So we sat down. It was quite chill. But I put my headphones in. I brought my headphones with me. I had them in as earplugs. And even then it was incredibly loud like my ears were ringing afterwards.

I mean, part of it was we were like, you know, there was nothing between us and the band. So it was just like an absolute fucking wall of sound coming at us. But they're also very, very sweet metal. Maybe you weren't supposed to be up there.

No, no, no, because there were other people. It wasn't just us. But my God, they were so loud. And very, their songs were all quite samey, I'd say. It really wasn't my vibe.

If I don't mind, metal. But it was very, the whole, it was very, Let me just recap this review by you. We went to a gig. It was very loud. It wasn't good.

It was fan boys, very loud. Very loud. It was loud. And then it went on for a long time. It was long and loud. I had to sit down. It was loud, too. But so here's the thing, if you're under, I think it was if you were under 18 or something,

you had to have a guardian, something like that. So there were quite a few other moms and dads there. Yeah. And we were all, there were a lot of them sit. Upstairs on the back, there were a lot of sofas and stuff. There were a lot of moms and their phones or reading a book. And I was there and, you know, it was fine. I'm just happy to be out with the kids and doing stuff.

So I go to gigs with them and I'm going to see paranormal activity on Saturday, which is a stage show version of the horror movie. And I was like, no way. Yeah. So I was like, fuck it. Yeah, I'll go see that. I'll go see that with my youngest. And she's going to love that because she loves the theater and stuff.

So it's just fun to go out with your kids and, you know, I got wingstop. I love wingstop. I had wingstop last night. Fresh. Don't get to go into a wingstop very often. That made my evening. Well, listen to this.

Easy, easy, easy. I've got, I've got a similar thing to tell you about where we're going tomorrow with my son and my wife. We're going to the Jersey Weekender, which is a gig as well. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like. Any, any, any chance of cheeky girls? No, it's not the cheeky girls. Although, I think they might.

have come for one of the weekenders one year. But we're going to see Alex James, Brit Pop Classical, you know, the bass player from Blur. He's put together a 36-piece orchestra. He's from my neck of the woods, you know. And yeah, he owns like a dairy farm, a cheese farm now. Yeah, he loves Dorset. He's doing this Brit pop classical show thing with like a big orchestra. And they just play all the old Brit pop songs, but like with a, with an orchestra. And I see this, Let's Rock. This is last month of 8th of September. Yeah, we're not going to that one.

Okay, good, because this has Matt Goss. Yes. From Bross, is that who? It's got Tony Hadley from Spandow Ballet, Nick Kirchor, Q and Cry, which has some of their songs, Labor of Love and Looking for Litter. In the, on the poster, it has the songs you will know them. You wouldn't know them otherwise. I know Hugh and cry.

If you know Nick Kershaw, you know Hugh and cry. I don't know Nick Kershaw. I've heard these names, but I can't, I couldn't tell you where like, you know, who they are sort of thing. If I hear, if I hear the song, I would, I would recognize the song, but like I don't know. What a draw. Matt Goss and Tony Hadley, calm down, Jersey. Yeah, there.

See, you're missing out. You could have come over. This is, yeah, yeah, the Alex Jamesings is on Friday. Alex, yeah, we're going tomorrow. Yeah. And then there's a, I'm not sure which one, the support for the Brit pop classical thing is a band called Duke and a band called Showhawk. And one of them is like a beatboxing trio.

I can't remember which one of is. Can I just say right up? I would not want to go to this in a million billion years. No. So let me know what it's like because I'm really good. I'll let you know. Yeah. I mean, you got it, you can't be too picky and choosy over here.

Like not much comes over. I understand that. Like, this is what's coming to Jersey. Tony Hadley, Matt Goss, you've got to take what you take. You got it, you got, but I'm not going to that one. That's on Saturday. I'm just going to the one on Friday. We just want to see the...

And you can always leave. You can always leave. Yeah, true. You can always leave. You can just, you can just leave. But I think it's because my son is, uh, is 15. Oh, well, he's going to be 15. So he's 14.

Wow. It's the same as, uh, what you just described. You have to, he has to have a guardian and he can just go. on his own. So we're going. But I don't think there's going to be sofas and places to read a book or go on your phone and stuff. But hopefully there's places to eat. I'm fine to just go to a place like this and eat and have like a cider or whatever.

I reasonably happen. Yeah, yeah. You say that. But sometimes if it's an outdoor event, there'll be deck chairs and stuff. Like I went to the end of the road, endorse it in about 2000. It would have been 2008, maybe, something like that. And it's a festival, big festival, it's like a Friday to Monday or whatever. Right.

And for the outdoor stage, there were deck chairs. You could grab a deck chair and sit on it, which was great. So, yeah. God, that's really good. I know, I know. I'm at that age now. I mean, look, I'm fucking 50. I'm not going to stand for seven hours in a field.

No, it's impossible. Or five hours at a gig. I'm just not. I'm sorry. When you're 50 listeners, you will be in the same boat. You will think, fuck, and I could use a sit-down. Bam, there's a deck. It makes your day. It really does. Yeah. Oh, man. So yeah, I don't know, I don't really know what to expect.

Yeah. I mean, it'll, it's, it's, it's something to do. Well, it's 80s themed. I mean, get out. When I was 15, I'm, I think we, would we, will we going to festivals, like V festival and stuff like that or was a little bit older? I can't really remember. I went to, I went to V. I went to I went to, it was crap. That saw the warp tour when that was going. Um, but we, I was, I went. I went to, I think it was in like 97, 96, 97 maybe. But like we were a bit young to be going to even something like that, right? Like an outdoor kind of festival sort of thing. That was in NA.

Like we didn't have obviously Redding or VF. I've been to Reading. I've been to the V festival as well. But man, I wouldn't want to go to those all the time. Like I know like Duncan goes to Glastonbury every year when it's on or whatever. But like I feel like I've been to those things like once. that's enough. I don't want to go again.

We camped over at Redding and that was a nightmare as well. Oh, my God. Yeah. It was good, but I wouldn't want to do it every year. It was good. I wouldn't want to. I know.

I think I'm too old to rough it in the way that you sort of have to. It's just too exhausting. Yeah. Yeah, it is. I find, you know, just I need my sleep or else I get really cranky. But I mean,

I'm excited to see Hewitt, Hewitt, Hewin cry. Human cry. Is that one person or two? No, there's a double act. You're going to fly over. You're going to take a break from all of your home improvement, get a charter of private jet and come over to see Matt Goss, headline the Let's Rock.

Matt Goss. Hugh and Cry, I think it was now, was it now? You've never heard of Bross, the band Bross. I haven't heard of any of these people, really. I mean, do they live on Jersey? Is that why? No, no, but it's not. So Matt Goss, was Matt Goss?

Wasn't he in the Blas? They're just not very popular enough. You've never heard Bross before. I'm not even from the UK and I've heard them. Like that, I think I watched a documentary on them. Bross. Bross. Wait, was it the other ghost that was in Blade?

So Bross was a band. It was two brothers. Two brothers. Two blonde brothers. Two brothers. It was two brothers and the drama. Wait, right, let me check this. Mrs. F. will know the name of the drummer.

They were like teen sensations when they came out. Hold on. Love, you remember Bross? What was the name of the drummer? Smash Hits called him Ken. All right, thanks, sir. Cheers. So, Mrs. F used to read Smash Hits back in the day, which is like The Magazine, right?

And it was Luke and Matt Goss, and Smash Hits always referred to the drummer as Ken, even though his name wasn't Ken. Tell your wife that Matt Goss is headlining Let's Rock on Saturday night in Jersey and see if she, see how that resonates. I thought you said she was a fan. Yeah. She was when she was like 13. She's not coming into.

She's not even brus. It's only Matt Goss. Yeah, well, they haven't fallen out. They don't, they're not on very good terms anymore. We're not bross anymore. Do you understand me? Say the Goss. They're called Goss.

Here's the thing. The band was called Bross, even though it was clearly meant to be bros. Because why would it be bross? Just because their last name is Goss. If it was Bross, it would be B. O-S-S. But it's not. It's B-R-O-S. Tony Hadley, you would recognize, Lewis, if you search him up. I've been on a plane with him. We've won't fly in the Netherlands. He was given out for

obviously a big one. Always believe in your soul. Something. I'm a bit tall. That one. Yeah. You're too old. You know the song, really. Not the guy from EastEnders. And also, true.

The Boodoo-Doo. Yeah. Nick Kirshah. Nick Kirshar, I don't know if you'd recognize Nick Kirshaw. Nick Kirschor had some pretty good songs. He's a radio one DJ or something. He's 68 years old now. They're all old as fuck.

Hugh and cry. Hugh and cry. Well, they were big in the 18. They had some good songs. They were both very bald men. Yeah, what's wrong with that? So Nick Kirscher had a song called The Riddle, right? You never ever saw the riddle.

Oh, they're a Scottish. Up now, Hugh and Cry. That's when there were Scottish bands. Hugh and Cry, Hugh and Craig, I'll tell you about Hugh and Craig. Come down, Glasgow, sent out on a Saturday night. I'll give you all fucking year. Oh, look, the Christians harvest for the world. Wait, that's not the original though, is it?

Maybe it is. When's there going to be a harvest for the world? There was an era when Scottish bands were all over the place. Really, there were a lot of big Scottish bands. Yeah. Yeah, what was you had the proclaimers? The proclaimers. And then you had that other band, um, was it called like the good, no, it was off Travis.

That was the, that was late. Simple minds, I think. In 80s, simple minds. Simple minds I'm thinking about. Talking about the real deal. Scottish rock band formed in Glasgow in 1977. Could have been a miracle. Jesus of Mary chain.

There you go. Who else is a big, I guess bagpipers, the lone piper. People, people hate on bagpipes? I fucking love a bagpipe, mate. Yeah, yeah. It must be my Scottish blood. It must be. I don't like, I don't mind a bagpipe either.

I kind of grew up like around bagpipes. My dad was in a, was in a pipe band. So I heard a lot of bagpipe people. Your dad blew the bags? He blew the bags. Yeah, he was in a, I don't know what the actual title is for it. Yeah, he's a bag, he's a big bag blower. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, love to blow on those pipes. Really, massage those bags. Just fill those bags right up. I heard your dad like to squeeze a bag and blow into a pipe. He loved squeezing and blowing into a bag, yeah. He put the pipe in his mouth and massage the bag. He would work the shaft and cut the ball of the pipes. Hey, speaking of which, Creed 1, 2, and 3 were on TV recently.

I didn't watch them, but they were on in the background. And I feel like it, like, all three movements, movies were just the same movie repeated three times. It's because the guy has no ideas. Yeah. Who's watching it in the background? It was just on. It was on TV.

So it was just on in the background while other things were happening. You live in a nursing home? What is going on? I feel like you. You don't have a TV on? Or a prison? No. I don't have TV on constantly in the background.

Man. Joe, our TV sometimes is on when we're not even home. Like sometimes I come in and I'll think people are home because the TV's on and nobody's home. The TV is just on. I don't know. You guys are in all the damn time. It's just a different world to me. Yeah.

It's always like it's always on like CBBC or CBBs or something. But then at night it just it's on whatever like BBC one or something. So whatever's whatever's on is is just on. And Creed 1, 2 and 3 have been on. But it's weird because you're kind of like. Not paying attention, but then every once in a while, you just like stop and pay attention. Every time I stopped to pay attention, it was just the same thing happening across three different movies.

It was, it was crazy. You had like the montage and everything. Yeah. Literally just a way to make a little bit of money and do some accounting. And that's why those movies are made. Yeah. Yeah. No one wanted three Creed movies, I'm pretty sure.

Yeah. Well, you know, I can't believe you don't. have, do you even watch TV, Lewis, or are you just like a device person? You guys don't watch. Do you guys have a TV? We, it's difficult. My partner is a bit squeamish. So she won't watch anything with sort of, you know, I was, I think we were watching an episode of, um, sort of detective show the other day. Right. And I, I, I could see this coming. There was like a bucket on the beach. Wait, it wasn't Ludwig, was it. Like, it's Ludwig was too much, right? Ludwig was fine. Um, Ludwig's fine. But there was, I don't know, some other show.

And I knew what was coming because I was, you know, the musical score. And I was like, okay, there's going to be a head under this bucket, right? But my partner was like totally taken by surprise. Nice. Have you guys ever seen? Like, I don't know. Have you ever seen a murder trial before? It's the, it's like a series of two-parters.

And it's, it's in a Scottish courtroom that they've allowed cameras into. Oh, yeah. God. they're so good. Fuck me, they're amazing. They're all like cold cases. So they're all old, unsolved murders and whatnot. No, they're not old cases.

They're they? Yeah, they are mostly. Well, the three that I've seen have all been old from like the 70s. So, wait, because I saw one about a guy. Oh, I'm talking about the show where it was like, I was a guy who people claimed it was in Edinburgh. People claimed he'd killed his girlfriend up at Arthur's seat or whatever it's called. Oh.

That was like, that was like a proper. per trial that was actually, they had cameras in the courtroom. It was gripping. Yeah. Because it was a real trial. I know. Yeah. There was no dramatization.

So what's this? It's called murder trial. And it's the same- Horting cold cases. But how does it work then? So the crown decides at long last to go through with a prosecution. And so you've got the defense and the crown. And the crown presents a case with evidence.

that they've collected over. And it's a reenactment? Decades. No, it's not. It's not a reenactment. It's like, it's all... The jury murder trial. Is that what it's called?

No, it's just called murder trial. It's on BBC one. Murder trial. Yeah. That's the kind of thing I think would be right to watch. Oh, it's great. Yeah. It's not overly like gruesome or glory.

You don't see like graphic... No, nothing like that. Because it's more like how the court works and, you know, they interview. like the prosecution, the defense a lot. And then they're bringing in, you know, witnesses. But like a lot of them have passed away because they're old, old cases. Like there was this one, it's a really good one. It was in Inverness and it was this, this young, young woman who's disappeared. And she was, she was in care. She was, she had like learning difficulties and

stuff. And she was being cared for by these, by this couple. And they were alerted, because one of the carers sort of like renewed her benefits. And so they were they were sort of alerted that nobody had seen this girl for quite some time. You know, she hadn't been to the doctor. She hasn't done anything or whatever. And then when they started looking into it, they'd realized that nobody had actually seen her since 1999. And like the renewal for the benefits was, this is like 2016. So they're like, this is so odd.

Like nobody's heard a peep from this woman. Nobody knows where she is. Nobody's seen her nothing. And they went to the house to like, you know, just check to see what was going on. And then the couple that were, you know, caring for were like, oh, she's just like bolted out the back door. And they're like, no, no, she hasn't. Like, we're here. Like, we can't hear anything.

Like, there's, there's no way. Nobody's seen her. So the whole thing gets kind of like dredged back up from, you know, 1999, so they have all these witnesses coming in and a lot of them have passed away because it's a long time ago. And they have all this testimony and because some of these cases are like, you know, they'd worked on them and they'd compiled a bunch of evidence, but they just never went through to, to, uh, to trial, you know, because they just didn't have enough, you know, I guess like the Crown prosecution at the time was like, there's, there's no way we can do this. Like there's,

I mean, they do a lot of, we have no chance of winning this. Yeah. So, well, that's what they do. Like all this stuff sits dormant and then they come back at it with like new technology. So they'll have some DNA breakthrough or something where they decide, yeah, okay, we can probably get this person. The show I'm thinking of was called The Push Murder on the Cliff. And that was an actual case from 2021. And then they showed the trial, the actual trial in the courtroom was televised. I think I know that people think that we shouldn't do that and it would be too much like America

where it almost feels like a TV show. Yeah. But I think showing people what justice looks like, showing people what trials look like, and why the courts come to these decisions is actually quite important because I think people have lost, like for two reasons. First of all, is justice being done?

And if not, you should show us what your version of justice currently looks like. And we should, as the fucking people, be able to say this is unacceptable, or it will show people this is why they only got eight years when you wanted to have them hanged. Like, this is the actual details of the case that you don't see past the headline in your newspaper or on the Daily Mail website. I want to see the actual trials, these high-profile

trials, I think televising them and showing people justice would be a good idea. Because here's the thing, if you want, you can fucking go and watch it. So saying, oh, you can't televise it, well, all right, so you're just saying it's only a limited audience? It's like when you go to a movie and they say you can't film it on your phone, fair enough. But that's because you know I'm going get to be able to watch it on TV. Yeah. They're just saying, no, you never get to see it. You can only read the incredibly detailed and dense legal documents.

Put it on fucking telly. I'd watch it. It's really interesting anyway. Like, you know, the one that I've been watching, we've been, we thought, we think it's really good. It's just really, just really interesting. But, you know, there's not like any glitz and glamour or anything to it. You know, it's just very, you know, this, they show you bits and pieces of the investigation.

they talked to some of the people that were involved in the investigation, but mostly it's just, you know, calling witnesses, you know, reviewing evidence and stuff like that. But it's just so well, it's just so well done. Like the people, everybody involved is just like really interesting, but they're all very sort of like good at what they do and everything. Like even the defense, you know, like you can, you can sometimes see like the defense are just like clutching at straws. You know, they're just trying to poke coals wherever they can sort of thing. Yeah, yeah. I feel like what like, it depends. I mean, I know there's like degrees of justice systems and some are better than others or whatever.

But like I feel like in this case, like maybe in Scotland as well, I feel like when the crown decides that they are going to go through and prosecute like normally there's like a pretty good. They have like some a pretty good indicator that they're going to win sort of thing. You know, like if they're going to go to all the trouble of because it's a tremendous amount of work, you know, like the the amount of evidence calling all these people in like one of the trials they had like, I think they called up like 1,500 people, you know, like to, to review and give evidence or testimony or whatever. That's pretty wild, isn't it?

It's fucking insane. Yeah. Just go on for weeks and weeks sort of thing. Change your subject, but did you hear the fucking Hunter Biden? Hunter Biden has released a fucking crypto coin? No. Like a scam coin? Oh, no.

Oh, my God. So I don't know if you guys noticed, but I saw this on social media. Hunter Biden had been sort of rehabilitated in the eyes of most people. Most people saw him as like a fucking washout drug addict. Didn't have anything good to say. He was just Joe Biden's fucked up son. And, you know, was a talking point for the right, even though the stuff that he did, some laptop shit and some being a drug addict, it's like nothing compared to the shit

that they all do every day, it seems. But whatever. Like with Obama's tan suit or Mamdani being a Muslim, they'll pick up on anything. But now Hunter Biden has done something bullshit, alongside the other dumb shit he did. He's launched a fucking meme coin. Oh, no. Like a total rugpole scam coin that lost 99% of its value instantly that it launched, because everybody knows what a fucking scam coin is these days.

And he did this. He went on Channel 5, you know that the YouTube channel Channel 5 with, is it Andrew Cowaham? Yeah. He went on that and they did some chat. And he asked for the mailing list of all of the Channel 5, like listeners or subscribers or patrons or something and they gave it to him for some reason thinking he was going to use it for good

and all he used it for was to advertise his scam coin. Oh no! Yeah. As with all of these guys, you look past the sort of advertising layer of their personality and you get to the actual core department of their brain and it's just insane grift

and whank and theft and evil. This is the problem with King. Like any kind of children of Trump are just going to be even worse. I mean, Trump's terrible. So the funny thing I saw this week was his 9-11 comment. They pulled me from the rubble of that building. They said we've never seen anybody survive falling from the top floor. They pulled me by the diaper.

It was sticking out of the back of my pants. Change my diaper. They gave me a hamburger. They said, Mr. President, they knew I was going to be a president. They said, Mr. President, there's a piece of rubble on you. It's the biggest piece of rubble we've ever seen on a person. We can't believe it. It's such a big piece of rubble.

And I said, don't worry, I'm a tough guy. I can take it. No, but what he's actually said, boss, he said, oh, you know, they used to say that the Twin Towers were the tallest buildings in New York and mine was the second tallest building. And now, I guess, mine's the tallest building. Yeah, there was footage on the day of the tallest buildings. Yeah. There was footage on the day of the tallest buildings.

him calling into a radio station to boast about it as well. Like this, it's not, he wasn't in the rubble. He was, he was at home on a radio call. He was boasting about how tall his building is. He was celebrating. He was, he was popping champagne to celebrate that his building was now the tallest. Oh, my God. That's the kind of, but we knew this about him.

I know. We knew that he was this. It's like, the White House has launched some games that you can play on the White House website, the official website. Oh, that's so cool. One of them is. the game Snake, but it looks like Snake is actually, you are a person, you pick up a chain of immigrants that wear orange jumpsuits like a prisoner and that none of them appear to

be white and you just, you walk around and you bring the immigrants in. There you go. Classy. There's a, they've used the Sega logo now says MAGA instead of Sega on their website. Yes. Supply lines, a game in which you must sort school lunches to who make America healthy again as you punch unhealthy items from a conveyor belt. Seed oils and beef tallow is promoted in this.

Flappy Bill, which is like flappy burr, but it's a bill that would go through the Senate, I guess. You play as a bold eagle. This is all absolutely dreadful and terrible. And Tetris, the whole point of building the wall of Tetris is to keep the foreigners out. So it's Tetris, but you're building the wall. You could make this up. as a satirical thing, could you? One could not make this up.

One could not indeed make this up. That's so laughable. It is official. That's the world we live in today, where the powers that be satirized themselves so that we don't have to. I think it's all the voice so that by being beyond satire, it's kind of harder to make fun of them,

because they do it themselves. You know, he still has a 38% approval rating? 38. 38. It's not a lot. That's nearly 40% of the population thinks he's doing a good job. Yeah, but it would be better if it was like 100% of the population thinking he's doing a good job.

That is the best. If I call a school report and I got a 38% on it, we're not having like a celebration dinner for it, are we? No, of course. But are you not also slightly shot that 38 out of 100 people are like, I think he's doing a terrific job? Well, he was almost, that's not that far off. He was elected.

We're not talking about somebody who's, you know, he was, he was elected. People obviously went out and decided that that was the guy for them and voted for him. So it's, it's not. No, I understand that, serious. But the point is, look at what he's done in two years. He hasn't even done the shit that they want him to do. Yeah, but look what he did in four years in his first term and they still voted for him. So he's always going to have a baseline approval rating because.

because it's like a cult. But they wanted prices to come down, including gash prices. They didn't want any foreign wars. Those are two things that he has absolutely done. And they're still saying he's their guy. Yeah, yeah. But they're always amazing. Deeply, deeply, deeply concerning.

I know, but like why, I mean, look what's happening. Look what's happening in the UK with Farage and stuff as well. It's people who are just working against their own self-interest. There's always going to be a baseline of support for these guys as well. I always think it's the problem is that we do have a massively unequal society, you know, where the rich have far too much and the everyone else is squeezed too hard. And that leads to people being unhappy, but they think voting reform or Trump is the way to out, right? Trump's promising $5,000 to every American if he wins the midterms, do you mean? Which is surely that's illegal.

Surely that is illegal. But it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, that's what we are dealing with, though, because that appeals to the, the people who are struggling. I mean, God, like, I think it's only illegal if he actually pays it, which I don't think he has any intention of doing. So, I mean, it's bizarre, but that actually is a, that is a universal, this very socialist idea to give money to everyone equally, right? Right. And it is a great leveler, right? It's not equal. It's only if he wins.

So the bribe, there's a difference. And also giving everybody. thousand dollars is not really helping it. The thing I was yesterday was like this micro documentary on Netflix. It's about the decoy plane that he took back from Turkey where he had to go through the... He hit in the bin or whatever. And left all of his, you know, all of the other guys on Air Force One, you know, and didn't, you know, I think he was here and a couple of his executive, like his hot executive assistant.

The crazy eyes one, the ones who just follows him everywhere. She's the girl from obsession is the meme I've seen of her. It's her. And it was him and her on the other plane. And all of his, all of his, all the other guys just left us hanging out. It's so ridiculous.

But he genuinely is, I think, scared of being assassinated. You know, he's genuinely thinks that he's Iraner trying to kill him. And I think they may well be, you know, certainly, you know, in a sense,

you know, certain leaders in the world want and influence the election to get Trump in charge because it benefits them. You know, Russia certainly feels like Trump's good for them. But Iran, they don't like Trump. You know, Biden or Kamala Harris wouldn't be bombing Iran, would she? Well, no, but apparently we were told that that was going to happen.

Yes. If you voted for her, it was going to be World War III and they were going to start this war and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. But hey, hey, let's not talk about that. We live in a crazy world. Let's move on and talk about him being in a fucking dinner car. I love all the recent stuff where he's posting images of himself like in military uniform

and like the 9-11's fucking coward ever. Isn't it so it's so funny how he can just reshape reality though. Because we talked about the 9-11 thing, but also he sort of is always saying like, you know, he's a, you know, because he got out of the draft, didn't he? He dodged the draft by saying it. It's like we all live in his dementia brain. Like the world. And he's starting to convince himself that he did earn all these military honors.

Yeah. It's insane. It's insane for him to claim that the rescuers pulled him from rubble, which is what he claimed, right? But he did say that. It's mad. I don't know if he was, I don't know why he would. He was carried out. Yeah, he was carried out.

But he was not. Like, we all know he was not. No, I know. And his supporters are like, he was. He said he was, he was. Or they just say, oh, he just says stuff. It's like that's what you say about an elderly relative who you wouldn't let drive.

That's not what you say about the leader of the supposedly free world. It's insane. Anyway, good luck Americans. Good luck Iranians. Good luck everybody listening to this podcast. Good luck everyone, especially if you have a house. If you have a house, you know. Sleep sound.

Oh, God, I have to go talk to the roofery. He's banging on those. the door. We'll see you next week. See you later. Bye. See you next week, everyone. Bye-bye.