Triforce! - The Bad News Show | Triforce #326

Episode Date: July 23, 2025

Triforce! Episode 326! Pyrion went to see Chaka Khan which somehow sets the tone for the entire episode, Lewis goes on a tangent about tangents and talks about building character for young people and we share a whole lot of bad news. Go to http://expressvpn.com/triforce today and get an extra 3 months free on a 1-year package! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickaxe. Hello everyone and welcome back to the Triforce Podcast. Podcast, yes. Podcast. Hello. So it's sweltering hot. Yep. Here with the UK.

I just want to do my annual reminder that, yeah, my air conditioning slash heating unit was quite expensive, but it's still the best thing I've ever bought in my whole life because it's 30 degrees out there today and it'll be 19 degrees in my fun little ice box that I'm going to sit in pretty much all day until the sun starts setting later on and then I'll go to the beach. Not bad, eh? Wow. Can I ask, is it only the, dare I say it, the studio from which you work that is cooled and the rest of the house is just left to their fate? Well, the rest of the house is, it stays pretty cool. It's not too bad because if we just keep if we keep the windows open and we keep the the blinds sort of, you know, so that the sun isn't just roasting the inside of the house.

It stays pretty cool. It's big enough. It's airy enough. You know, it's not like a little sweat box. So we got these things that go over the windows. I've definitely spoken about this before because we've got the metal things like this in like in like France. Like, you know, they have like those shutters.

No, I don't know why we never got around to that. I presume it's because it's routinely very hot over in France and Italy. Parts are here. Sure thing. But yeah. But I mean, I've always thought those shutters are a fantastic idea for security reasons and for reasons of keeping cold out and heat, uh, heat out and cold out and heat in and whatever, either way for the dormers, we've got these, it's like, uh, it's quite a, it's hard to describe, but the way a dormer window works for anyone that doesn't know is that it's pivots on it's sort of axis, the central axis of the window.

So you open it at the top and when you pull the window down, it pivots at that middle point. Imagine that. Yeah, yeah. I know. So you can get this screen that attaches from the window frame to the far end of your dormer window, you'd have to screw these bits in. And it's like a sort of, you know, those, those, uh, protectors you put in windows when

little kids are in a car so that when they're in the car, the sun doesn't just beat down on your baby. Like, like, like, like kind of like a mesh thing. It's like a mesh thing. So that thing we've got on all the windows in the loft and it means that you can have the blinds open and the heat gets repelled by the mesh. Because honestly, that to me, whenever people complain their house is hot, and I say you've got every window open, every curtain wide open,

all that hot air is just coming in and the sunlight is just cooking your house from the inside out. So yeah. Yeah. Keep it. Keep it. You got to keep it cool. In here though, if I'm in here all day and I didn't have this, it would be like an oven.

Like I remember when I first started working in here and it wasn't even finished. And I thought, oh, you know what? It'll probably be pretty cool in here. And then summer hit close the windows and stuff, because, you know, like you're recording, I don't want to, like, you know, bug people that are, you know, outside or I don't want to bug people that are outside, or... I don't want, if my kids are playing outside, for them to get picked up on the mic or whatever. So close everything, and within about five minutes...

I thought it would be the way you don't want to get hurt, yelling at the top of your lungs. Just melting. Well, yeah. I mean, if I'm getting really zesty out here, I'm playing Overwatch or something, and I'm effing and jeffing my head off... You don't want the whole of Jersey to hear your salty rant. No. really zesty out here. I'm playing Overwatch or something and I'm effing and jeffing my head off. You don't want the whole of Jersey to hear your salty rant. No.

I feel like there's like a few days a year when it gets unbearably hot and everyone has their fans on and we just have to suspend recording. Yeah, this is those. It's gonna be like 30 today apparently and tomorrow. Yeah. It's just... It's too hot. It's inevitable. And, you know what? I love it. Yeah, it is nice. It loosens things up. Your schedules and everything. It's inevitable. And do you know what? I love it. It is nice. Yeah. It loosens things up. You know, your,

your schedules and everything are like different because you just, you, you tend to like sort of, um, hunker down during the day, try to stay cool. And then at night, when it's starting to cool down, there's a bit of breeze or whatever that you go out. So it's kind of, I kind of like that, you know, it's, it's just a break from the routine. Just go out. It is funny. Yeah. Eat some chips or something. It's nice. I went out for a walk last night at like nine o'clock and it was perfectly nice. But you know, you just think about what that's like in winter.

Oh yeah. You know, when it gets dark at like four 30. Well, like when we went to go see Ghostface, we were walking through that park and it was pitch black and it was like five o'clock in the evening and it was wet and miserable and freezing cold. And we were all stood in that like warehouse in full jackets and coats. Yeah, winter coats, everything. And it was still cold. It was, it was pretty... We were out of there by like 7.30 and it just felt like it was like one in the morning. Yeah. You know. I know. It's crazy. Oh, speaking of going to see, I went to see Shaka Khan last night.

Yeah. Yeah. I remember you saying that you were going to see her. Yeah. Was it, was it amazing? No. I'll tell you why. First it was at Hampton Court Palace, which is one of the most beautiful venues I've ever been to. It's inside one of the courtyards of some part of the palace and they've constructed this sort of seating arrangement in this what was once a huge garden, I'm sure. There's sort of regular seating down the front and then at the back there's a covered section with kind of stadium-style seating. Perfectly comfortable.

You know, all the rest of it. Nice staging. Sound quality was great. Shaka Khan can absolutely still sing. She's fantastic. But is she like seventy five years? Seventy two. All right. To her voice is still absolutely incredible. She's pretty. They do that one check. A concert concert with the harmonica and all of that.

How nice we'd left by then. We were there for about an hour and 10. And to be honest with you, I really like those Chaka Khan songs. Yeah. But I realized as we were there that we don't really like most Chaka Khan songs. We only like like two or three because a lot of it is just, it's pretty samey. It's fine. It's not offensive or anything.

It's just like, I don't, I would never listen to this by choice. It's just one of her sort of less well-known songs. Her peak, her really good stuff was what I really wanted. I didn't get it. So and I was just this is the other thing. It was outside. So it was it was getting pretty, pretty fucking hot. And most of the audience were middle aged in size and in heat. So as Mrs. F put it, most of the women there were menopausal. So she said they were just putting off heat

like radiators. So it's just literally sitting amongst all these sweaty, hot, middle aged fat people like us. I mean, you knew what kind of gig it was because at the start of it, the gates open at 5 thirty, shackers on at nine. So you've got all this time to chill in the grounds of Hampton Court Palace, which is stunning. And you could just sit in the garden. People were having these lovely picnics, drinking bubbly, all the rest of it. Fantastic. But you knew it was going to be a certain age group when they said,

everybody, please take your seats and everybody takes like a minute to get up off the ground. And everyone's like, oh, like a minute to get up off the ground. And everyone's like, it was really, as well. No, there was no clapping, but there was a lot of people my age, sitting down, clap alongs. That's it. That is like a big fixture at middle aged musical things. No, it was just everybody was dancing and a couple of people were singing along, but

it was just enough. I was nice to see her, she's an icon, but I was like, geez, getting out of here is gonna be a nightmare, it's gonna be like, getting an Uber home is gonna be a nightmare. I guess you've been there since like six or something as well, I'd say. Yeah, we've been there a couple of hours, so I was just like, you know what, it was just a nice evening out with Mrs. F and she was not into it massively. She was very sweet of her to just come along with me. Whose idea was it to go? Mine. It was fully mine.

I booked it like two weeks ago when I told her she was like, oh, nice. And I was like, oh, shit. I thought she'd be like, oh, my God. But, you know, she said, like, Sammy likes a few of her songs. But I realized that I also only know like a couple of her songs. So it was quite boring, unfortunately, but she was incredible. She's like, if you were a big Shaq Khan fan, great gig. Yeah. I mean, I always thought that like, you know, I think like when you said Shaq Khan, I was like, wow, God Shaq Khan, that would be

amazing. But now that you mention it, I don't really know much about it. I didn't well, for one, I didn't know she was American. Not that it matters, but I didn't, I didn't know that. No, I just didn't really think about it at all, which is the worst possible outcome. The real name is Jean-Marie Tupperware. Jean-Marie Tupperware. But also I think I only know like one song and it's that one that I, the one that I sung earlier, the Shaka Khan one, you know, the Shaka Khan, Shaka Khan, Shaka Khan. Do you do this kind of thing?

Often P-Flex like booklet trips, dates for you and your, you and your wife. We'll do, we'll do stuff like that. I mean, especially the general thing is that now we're at an age where the, I mean, we left the kids alone and it was fine because they're 16 or 13. So it's like, you know, previously it was like, oh, who's going to look after the kids and how long are we going to be and where we're going to go? Yeah. So now it's like, you know, they're old enough. If you think about it, for anyone questioning that, if we hired a babysitter,

how old do you think the babysitter would be? They'd be 16. We've had babysitters who were like 13, 14, looking after two kids. Yeah, we've all the way into town. So crazy, you know, it's it's 16 and 13. Think back to when you were that age. I absolutely my mom worked nights and it was just me looking after them. I used to babysit my neighbors when I was around that age. And at the time I was like, yeah, this is fine.

You know, like I would fall asleep, like on their couch. Like I'd have to put their kids to bed and everything. I'd fall asleep on their couch watching like Tom Green or something. I'd get woken up. They'd like, they'd come home and wake me up and be like, Oh, okay, it's time to go. I got paid like $5 for like, like a 13 hour babysitting job. But like, but they ordered, they, they left money so that we could order pizza and I was allowed to just eat all their food and stuff. But one time I ate quite a bit of their food, to be fair, but they said I could. And they complained, they, they phoned my mom and they're like, yeah,

he ate way too much food. But yeah, it's kind of weird. It's crazy to think back. I was only like 13 or 14 years old. And it's quite, I mean, I would never leave my kids with a 13 or 14 years old. And it's quite, I mean, I would never leave my kids with a 13 or 14 year old now. Like there's, there's no possible way that would happen. No, cause we knew what we did as babysitters. Like I remember I would have been about 13 and I babysat a couple of lads that were younger than me and we made swords out of rolled up

newspaper that loads of old newspapers in the house. We made these long swords and we would just whack at each other with newspapers for hours. And the kids were sweaty and then they wouldn't go to bed because they were like super hyped up. Parents came home, they're like, oh, you're still up. And there was newspaper everywhere, like little bits of newspaper. And we were like, oh, we'll tidy up. And they were like, don't worry. We had a great time. It's cool. And I was like, man, if this was a, you know, if I did this regularly They'd be like Ted. Could you not smash the newspapers everywhere? And yeah, oh, sorry. I've got a few the pigeons Sorry, it feels like more work than it's worth really you get back and a 13 year old has been rolling up Newspapers and smashing them everywhere and stuff. You just think why did we bother going out?

There's just stay home and not have to deal with all of this extra stuff that's happened or whatever. But I love that you live in this... Put the seeds out for the pigeons. There we go. ...seed feeding world. How often do they come by? Three times a day. Wow. Like clockwork or is it more just... Well, they do a flyby of the window to see if I'm in here. If the curtain's drawn, they'll sit on the window sill and they'll go, until I open the curtain. When I open the curtain, they fly off and they watch me from the

roof opposite. Because I mean, even though we've got a good relationship, I'm clearly a predator, maybe the apex predator of this room. Right? Right. So then they're like, natural prey. Of this whole room, I'm the apex predator. Wow. You're like a little area boss. Quite a claim. Exactly. Yeah. And they're like, well, he does feed us. We're like the sandworm of that, that, of that room. Yeah. I've been playing a lot of Dune recently, by the way. Sorry for you could turn anytime. Yeah. So in their mind, they're like this could, he could be playing a very long con here.

And one day because he's got predator instincts, he'll just snap and eat us. So they're very cautious. But they know how to communicate with me. Sometimes Mr. Pidgey jumps in the window and tap dances on my bin because he's got a metal lid. And that really gets my attention. But yeah, they know when the seeds are coming because they see me get the seed bag out.

And once they see the bag, they're like, well, he's going to put the seed out. They wait on the other roof. And once it's out, they fly over and stuff their faces. I went to speaking of like gigs and going out and stuff. I'll just, I'll just give you some context for this one as well, because it's a little bit, it's not, it's not embarrassing, but it's like, it's kind of weird. But my, my youngest is pretty much toilet trained, but at that crucial moment in toilet training where there's still accidents. So it's, it's tough for us to like leave the kids

with like my mother-in-law for too long sort of thing because she's, she's not really able to deal with, you know, any accidents or whatever. I mean, she can, but it's like, it's not ideal, right? So we're not really able to go out anywhere or do anything for like a, like a length of time where, you know, um, you know, we might be just leaving like a big shit fiesta at home or, you know, piss everywhere or something. So, um, but recently we went to, we went to a day disco, which is, which is good. It's, it's like, it's like a nightclub, but they open it at like two in the afternoon and it closes at like eight. And then they tidy up a bit and then they open it again later for like, you know, the real party animals, but it's, it's meant for like, you know, older people who don't necessarily want to like join like the nightly meat market of a club sort of thing. And it's like themed around whatever,

you know, so like this one that we went to, we went with like some of our friends and it was themed around eighties and nineties music. So it was great. You know, it was like, every song that was played, we knew, uh, we were drinking and stuff and, uh, we don't often do this, but the big one was that the DJ, the guest DJ in Jersey, this is in Jersey, was Dave, the drummer from Blur. And my wife's a huge Blur fan.

So she got to meet Dave. Yeah, he was really nice. We're just like, Dave, can we just get a picture with you or something? He's like, yeah, of course. We like had a chat with him for a bit and stuff. It was really cool. So there you go. We got to meet Dave at a day disco for all the people. Dave's old.

Do you think this is like in his sixties or maybe late fifties? I don't know. They're all old as fuck. These bands, you know, playing like he was playing Oasis songs. He played like smells like teen spirit. He was playing Snoop Dogg. Like, Oh my God, it was unbelievable. It was just like my, my, my Spotify playlist, but I got to listen to it not in my garage with other people. It was just like my Spotify playlist, but I got to listen to it not in my garage with other people.

It was wonderful. Is it airconned in there? Yeah, it was perfectly airconned in there. Yeah. It sounds like, I mean, I can't believe the Habs Court Garda was so unairconned. It's outside. But like, I know, but like in a sense, like exactly, it's outside, but yet the metaphor to like the radiators.

Mrs said that I was like, oh shit, that's right. Just like when we went to a gig, um, this was, uh, I think it was either the very start this year or the very end of last. I went to see, uh, fuck me. Hold on a sec. Let me find out for you. Fuck me. Hold on a sec.

I'm just looking them up. Um, yeah, no, they're pretty good. I can't I can't find a good check out their early stuff, though. That's the best. All right. Yeah. Katie J. Pearson. Sorry, Katie. Oh, yeah. I know you're a massive fan of the Triforce. Went to see her and she's a solo artist. And so then because she's a woman, a lot of the audience were women.

And I was like, man, it smells lovely in here. I talked about this on the podcast. You do. And it was literally this is F was like, man, it smells lovely in here. I talked about this on the podcast at the time. And it was literally, Mrs. F was like, well, yeah, there's loads of women there. So that's all their perfume. I was like, oh yeah. So it's one of those things. Like I didn't even think of the fact that menopausal women would act more like tiny radiators, but apparently they do. So we should spread them out and use them to like, you know, heat up the old folks. There's that great clip, isn't there? It makes the rounds every now and then of Reddit of that, that black lady, you're like a stand in like a baseball game or something when she's got like coils of smoke, like of like water vapor, like going around her head. She's like on fire. It's

amazing. They're both like giggling away at it. So here's something my, my youngest, the other day, I like to, I like to have conversations where I'm sort of winding them up. You know both like giggling away at it. So here's something my youngest, the other day, I like to have conversations where I'm sort of winding them up. You know, like dads do, you've got to tease your kids a bit. But sometimes it goes wrong. And I always think they're going to say one thing, but sometimes his kids don't give a fuck. They'll be brutally honest. So I was joking about, you know, we were talking about how Mrs. F was on her way home from work and blah, blah, blah. And there was a couple of chores we hadn't done around the house yet. And I was like, oh shit, we should do that before Mrs. F gets back.

And my youngest was like, oh, she won't mind. I said, oh, you don't know, love. I said, mama is far too good for me. I'm hanging on by a threat. I've got to keep her happy. And she was like, this is what my youngest said. She goes, well, yeah, she is too good for you, but you're a good dad and a good husband. I was like, what do you mean she's too good for me?

You meant to back me up here and say something nice. But she's like, no, she is too good for you, but you're a good dad and a good husband. I was like, what do you mean she's too good for me? You meant to back me up here and say something nice. But she's like, no, she was like, I can't lie. Mama's far too good for you. I was like, damn, thanks kid. And you get no respect. You do everything for them. And then they just, they just turn around. They're like, I like this person better than you.

I know. I'm like, damn, that is brute. Yeah. That's fine. You've got to be careful sometimes doing these joke criticisms of yourself, because I've had that happen a few times. They've just nodded and agreed with me. Like I was serious. But I think it's sometimes, it's a lot of things, right? Sometimes they're not listening. I think the human dynamics of interacting with other people is always

fascinating to me because like on this podcast, we don't listen to each other sometimes. We're just in our world. You've had a thought about Chaka Khan and you're like, oh yeah. And then you go off down a little rabbit hole and you're like, oh, maybe I should take my partner to go and see a Chaka Khan or something. I haven't done a date for a while. I wonder what's on. And then you like, you know, you stop. And then by that time you two have said like 10 minutes of chat. Yeah.

I'm like, oh no, I'm so trained to not listen now though, because like I can't even in my house, like we, we cannot even have a conversation like even about something important, like, you know, like we need a two second conversation just to decide what's happening in the morning. For example, like, uh, logistically, you know, somebody needs to take somebody somewhere or whatever you're trying to have this conversation. And then everybody in the house just decides that's the best time to either melt down or ask really deep, meaningful questions about like, you know, what the meaning of life is or whatever. And it's just like, man, I can't even. But it trains you in the end to just almost zone out completely and not listen

to anything anyone is saying. I love that you have that three different ages where you have one person who's learning to poo, one person who wants to know how to do this thing in Minecraft, one person who wants to know what is having an existential crisis about the nature of reality. We'll start a conversation and then we'll immediately be interrupted with, can I get this game that's not appropriate for me or watch this movie that's not appropriate for me? And this will be going on the whole time. And we're like, no, trying to have a conversation. Then the middle one will pipe up and be like, I have a question. And it'll be like, uh, why is, uh, water wet or something, you know,

like it, like that middle kid, um, you know, going through the, like the philosophical era. And then our youngest one will just be repeatedly and very loudly barking like a dog, but reminding you that she's barking like, like, so she'll be like, woof, woof, I'm barking like a dog. Woof, woof, woof. I'm barking like a dog. Like, yeah, I can fucking hear you barking like a dog. You don't need to point out that you're barking like a dog. I wish you just weren't barking like a dog. I'm trying to say something. Uh, and that's it. That's it.

How does every time. Which one to tack onto cause sometimes you just want to get down on your knees and also bark like a dog. You know? Well, oftentimes we'll tack on to the, the eldest because that's always the more almost pressing one, you know, because you're hoping that he'll be angling into something and he'll explain the nature of water to, you know, if he's wanting to be heard,

he'll just be telling the other ones to shut up as well. Like he has no filter because he's at that age. So he'd be like, oh, shut up, shut up. Oh my God. Oh, shut up. Oh my God. He's trying to tell us about, you know, his friend or he wants to go somewhere with his

friend or something. So it's just, it's just chaos. It just completely immediately descends into chaos. It's it, it, it, it's, it's, it's great. Sometimes another times, man, it's like so deflating. You're just like, Oh God, I can't even just say one thing. So sometimes it's just, a lot of stuff will just go unsaid, but luckily we can just sort of pick up each other's, you know, uh,

signs or whatever like, oh yeah, no, I need to go do this now or I need, you know, oh yeah, I've just remembered to have to do this. So it's, it's chaos, but it somehow works, you know? Yeah. Oh, bad. Three is not the magic number. I think two was the magic number. Two was, was fine. Three is just insane. I will say, I think it's going to be very nice for you in later years, though, having more, because if those three all go off to have families of their own, although that is a lot of work and stuff, I love the idea of having a big family

get together, all the grandkids and everything. It would be wonderful. So I'm probably in a position where only one of my kids is going to be having children and has spoken about it. wonderful. Yeah. So I'm probably in a position where only one of my kids is going to be having children and has spoken about it. My eldest despises children. I was like, I mean, you know, you're still a child. They're like, no, God, stand them.

I was like, I used to think like that. But like my friend, my good friend of mine, Ken, he said, we were talking about this because he was getting towards 40 at the time. And I said, are you ever going to have kids? And he was like, no. And I said, you might change your mind when you get older. He was like, no, I won't. I was like, oh, you might. I did. And he was like, OK.

And then he waited a few hours. And then subsequently, when I mentioned my kids, he says, do you regret having kids? I was like, no, because you might change your mind. I was like, OK, fair enough. You can't really just tell people that they might change their mind. You just got to accept their opinions. Yeah, you got to assume that people know what roughly what they're doing. You know, right. can't really just tell people that they might change their mind. They just go accept their opinions. Yeah.

You got to assume that people know what roughly what they're doing, you know, right? I've got plenty of friends that don't have kids and I don't think they regret it at all. I think they're just, you know, fine doing what they do or whatever. I feel like anyone that regrets it. I feel like I wasn't like, I, my, I think my wife wanted children more than I did at the time, but I was like open to it.

You know, I wasn't like dead against it. You know, you hear about some people who are like, Oh, I will never have them, you know, and they'll, they'll, they'll really go to lengths to like, stop it from happening or whatever. Uh, I was always like, yeah, no, like I, I get, you know, I, I kind of want to have kids sort of thing. But now that, now that we've had them, obviously I just think, Oh, I don't know what I'd do without them.

I don't know how my life would be without them sort of thing. I don't think I'd enjoy my life without them kind of thing. But, um, but yeah, I think, uh, I think people that don't have them, uh, and know that they don't want to have them and are just doing the stuff that they know they want to do. I think that's, that's good too. I think you should. The worst is when people have kids, they know they don't want them and then they don't want them when they've had them. Uh, I think that's gotta be the worst, right? It must just feel like shit all the time. Oh my God. But it happens all the time.

It does happen a lot. Yeah. You've been very quiet Lulu. What are you up to? Nothing. Nothing. Why? But what quiet in terms of body, what quiet in terms of getting involved in the conversation? No, you're just just quiet. I'm just wondering if something's something's happened. If you're busy. No, no, no, no, no. I'm just I'm just.

Well, how's your week? He's reeling from Susanna Reid going off on one on Robert Jenrick on on the news. What happened to Susanna Reid and who's Robert Jenrick? Robert Jenrick is that concern. He's the Lord Chancellor, Shadow Chancellor or whatever. He's that conservative guy. But he was on TV doing that fair Dodgers, you know,

like people not paying their fare on the tube. But he was doing that, you know, like he was running up to them and he's like, what makes you think that you're allowed to just not pay like confronting them? So he goes up to this guy and confronts him. And the guy is like, I'm going to fucking stab you. Get out of my face. Oh, my God. And guy's like, I'm going to fucking stab you, get out of my face. Oh my God. And he's like, well, okay, like, sorry.

And then like moved on and Susanna Reed was interviewing him after the fact. And he was like, he was all chuffed because he was like, yeah, you know, I was, I was really running them down and like, uh, you know, getting right in their face and asking them what makes them think they have the right to not pay their fare and everything. And she's like, did you report the guy with the knife? And he's like, no. And he's like, she's like, why that? Why?

Why not? There's people on the tube. You knew he had a knife and you didn't report it to the police or anything. Like there's children on there and everything. She was like really pissed off. And he was just like, oh, like started stumbling. And she's like, you've just made this all about yourself. Like you just don't care. You just this is just a big publicity thing for you and just you. He was like, No, no, no, no. Trying to backtrack and everything. It was

amazing. I'll see if I can find the clip. It was so good. It was really good. Yeah. But so we had location that it was all made up. If he why is an MP going around doing YouTube style fucking pop boxes? What's going on? I don't know. I don't know. It's just, it's just a, it's just a publicity. They're meant to be, don't fucking tell me we're going to have prankster YouTube style MPs. What is happening? Get off the internet. I don't want you on the internet at all. I want you just digging away, being very boring and doing some kind of trudging bureaucracy and making things better. I don't want you deciding that you need to have a fucking personality online.

Fuck off. Yeah. It's like the big thing now though. They're all, they all want to do stuff like this. It never seems to work either, but this is why I think I saw the clip on, uh, have I got news for you, but I Got News For You. But if you want to watch it, I'll post it. Before we continue, using the internet without ExpressVPN is like taking a call on a bus on speaker. Do you really want the whole train to know about your deepest, darkest secrets? Because all of your traffic flows through the servers of your ISP, they know every single

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So protect your online privacy today by visiting expressvpn.com slash triforce. That's E-X-P-R-E-S-S-V-P-N dot com slash triforce to find out how you can get up to four months extra for free. Expressvpn.com slash triforce. This is weird. It's weird that you mentioned this show. I'm not sure it's the same show, but I saw a clip that had a friend of mine in it who's a revenue protection guy who works on the railway. He was confronting this kid who had kept buying child tickets even though he was 18. He'd got away with it multiple times. I know it's interesting stuff. A friend of mine was doing some work with local

farming groups and stuff. One group of these people have got this city farm set up. They don't call them kids or children, they're called young people, very importantly. And they sort of, the young people make all the decisions on this farm, you know, about what they're going to do and they have to feed the animals themselves and figure out what they're doing every day anyway. They're very like, the idea is, it's like empowering for young people to, it's very hard to talk about them as not children because they are, but the whole point is to give them their own space and build up independence and all this stuff. It's all very well-meaning and quite hippie, I think, from what they were telling me.

One of the things that was happening was they were asked to build a community garden and project there. They so they thought what they would do is they'd get the kids involved and ask the kids, young people, what they want from it. So they got all them all together and they had this round table discussion and the young people just want Minecraft. That's it. They're like, yeah, Minecraft. And so, the team were a little bit... Because they're not really into gaming and it's not really their thing. And so they weren't really sure what that meant. And I think for me, that would be like, oh, great. I reckon you could probably figure out a way to make a little Minecraft style garden? You get some wooden cubes to sit on

and you get some grid-based, and it's very American, right? Building a very organized, you could easily have some design that would make that quite interesting and quite easy. But I think it was for them, it was something that they were almost surprised because they felt like these kids were almost not homeschooled necessarily, but certainly supposed to be in this environment where they were protected from that. And so not influenced so much by the outside world. I think the whole point of this independence

is to get kids to think... I think to me, the whole thing read like the idea of this place was for kids to discover stuff on their own, but to an extreme. And I said, it sounds like they're supposed to rediscover maths. It's like Lord LaFly's style. You do have to give young people some guidance or else they are just going to do nothing. Or it's inevitable that they are full of the influences of the modern world like Minecraft anyway, right? You can't somehow keep these young people pure so that they will make these pure decisions, right? Like this, you always have to warn them against all the problems or else they're

just going to be vaping it up and, you know, stabbing one another. Will they be stabbing one another and vaping? Hell yeah. That's what the youth do. Every time somebody says something like this, it's always like the worst possible scenario, which doesn't apply to like 99% of the population. You can't just have a load of unsupervised young people. They'll get bored enough.

We knew what it was like. They'll get bored enough and they won't just stab each other. They'll find something to do. It wasn't as innocent as the newspaper fights. You know, there were always people in our class having like, you know, smoking by the bike sheds and then, you know, having sex with each other. That's what it was like when we, when we were at school anyway. And then, and I think we were, I think it was, like you said, the childminders were younger,

but also we would go off on school trips and there'd be like one teacher with, you know, 40 kids, you know, camping. There was always one guy, one girl sneaking off together and like, you know, all this stuff. And I guess it still happens. It must always one guy, one girl sneaking off together and like, you know, all this stuff. I guess it still happens. It must happen today, but it's like, you can't trust kids to like behave properly if you just... Now they sneak off to vape and cyber on their phones. Stop cybering in there! I am, I'm, I'm positive. I think that the general, the general way these things work is actually very positive, but I think we are like, like, like, like Juke of Edinburgh

and these, these things, they do build. It was a disaster for my eldest, an absolute disaster. They're helpful, right? It's your, your, you, what do you mean disaster? I mean, it was an absolute disaster. Did you not think it was the big hike? Is that the big hike? Made you the man you are today? Is that like the camps? It's like a, like a boot camp for young people and they do a massive, it's not, it's not, it is, um, it's a bunch of things, but one of the things is indeed a big walk. Now, the problem I had was that the person running it at my eldest's school seemingly wasn't an evil bitch.

I see. I'm pretty sure I spoke about this at the time. I don't know if I did, that it was the hottest day of the year. Oh yes. Does that ring a bell? It would have been like three years ago. People are very clueless about this. When you live in an air-conditioned office all the time, you don't go outside the whole year and you have to organise Duke of Edinburgh.

Because a lot of these people aren't actually outdoorsy people at all. And yet, the Duke of Edinburgh, you have to do this incredibly exhausting hike that no one prepares for at all. Will Barron Well, I mean, the main thing is that a hike in that heat, I'm always thinking, you know, it's going to be one of those BBC articles. School regrets sending moron teacher to look after 20 fucking kids. Do you know what I mean? Like, you know, your kid is going to be one of the ones that disappeared out of crevasse or something. That's what I'm always worried about. Yeah. But the thing here was it wasn't like, oh,

this is dangerous. It was just what a shit lack of planning. For example, we got there and I said, you know, is my kid going to have to carry this huge rucksack in this heat? And the organizer was like, oh, yeah. And I said, it's like 35 degrees. Are you sure that this is like, OK, they're going to have to lug this really heavy? And she was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's part of it. I said, but, you know, this list. Oh, no, the lady said to that's right.

She said, well, maybe you should have packed less stuff because the bag was heavy. But there's a list that they give you. Yeah. I said, you gave us a list. And she just laughed and I almost, I wanted to throttle. Anyway, because they're just there for them to be able to turn around and say, well, you didn't pack what was on the list. Cause you miss like one thing. And that's their escape from every possible thing that could happen or any sort of criticisms you could have of it. Well, you didn't pack the Funyuns. So what do you expect?

So I think that the main reason what you were meant to do was coordinate with the other kids in your sort of troop, if you like, and say, I'll bring the this, you bring the that. But there's no mention of that on the sheet on it doesn't say talk to the other three people you're going to be in a group with and make sure that you don't have to carry everything. It was just assumed that they'd figure that out or something. And the thing is, when you have a kid who's neurodivergent, they're talking to other people that they don't really know for them. It's like really challenging. So to just dump it and say, well, it's the hottest day of the year.

You're carrying way too much stuff off you go. And when I went to pick him up, I was like, this is absolutely fucking ridiculous. And we were just angry about it all the way home. Yeah, I know what you mean. We've had, we've had a couple of, um, of things like that. Not, not as bad as that, but certainly I hate when they plan stuff, but they, you know, it's like, oh, we plan this whole thing.

And then you get to the end of it and you're like, I've done all the fucking work, like you have not provided a thing. You've planned this whole thing. Nobody wants to do it. You haven't been at all generous in providing anything. It's just been somebody sat in an office and typed up a word document of all, of all of these fucking pain in the ass things that I now have to do that you will not do like you, you, you expect them to turn up. You won't even give them a fucking bottle of water.

You know, like it's it's mad. It is madness. But we've had some good ones. Equally, we've had some pretty some pretty good ones that were really well planned and we didn't have to do anything. Those are the best ones, but they're few and far between, for sure. A lot of it is just like they send you the forms and everything. And you're just like, what the fuck am I signing my kids up for this? Like,

it'd be easier if they were just at home and I organized something, you know, what I mean? Like this is more work than that. And they're, they're meant to be out and taken care of, looked after all day, pretty much. You know, like they have all these things in place for safeguarding and all this and stuff. It's like, great. Can you just give them some water? Oh no, we can't give them water. Whoa, what the fuck? Like it's so stupid. Like some of it is so fucking stupid. It's on the other end. It's gotta be tough being these people who are relatively underpaid for what they do and have to deal with every day. And a huge

amount of overtime and like, you know, dealing with so many different things. I mean, it's such a massively complicated thing being a role model and a, you know, an educator in so many different ways, right? You're dealing with kids across the age groups and different personalities and also all the parents. You're kind of the butt of a lot of complaints as well. And also you've got the people above you telling you to do this and do that. And everyone asks you to do something all the time. There's always something that I know teachers are always being said, oh, could you watch the chess club? Could you do this thing? Can you do this thing? Like it's like constant favors and extra work, you know, because it just keeps getting piled onto you. Someone has a fun idea that then

turns into a commitment. And I think it does grind you down. And you end up with, with people leaving and then the only people you have left are incompetent people too. Yeah. Those are the ones that stay. It is always the incompetent ones. It's a shame because they're crying out for teachers over here. They're crying out for them. They just can't. Nobody wants to do it. They literally crying out, crying around. They're crying. They are crying.

Teach my children. There's a lack of, of teachers because it's a,, Jersey's a funny one because it's expensive to live here. A lot of people will just go off to university and not come back. So they might go to university and train and teaching, but they'll never come back because it fucking costs a fortune to live here. And if you're not lucky enough to have some generational

wealth or something, you're fucked. Like there's no way you're buying a house over here. There's no way you're living day to day without really just being, you know, like a paycheck away from doom. So a lot of people just don't bother coming back. Yeah. I mean, also if you were young, like if you were 21, would you really want to be on Jersey? Like probably not. Yeah, if there was opportunities, but there's none. Unless your mom and dad are like, you know, really established. What are you going to do with 21 on Jersey? There's, there's.

In terms of fun and culture and stuff. You're going to want to go to the mainland. You would want to travel for sure. I think it's an all right place to live. It's just so expensive. And you know, like when you're just, when you're just at home chilling or going out with your friends and stuff, you don't really think about it much. You know, like it's a good place to come back to after you've been traveling or you might

go somewhere for a couple of months, even like traveling like a longer, longer or whatever, but you can come back. But the thing is, like I said, it's the opportunities. There's not like a massive resource pool of people and there's not a massive job market either. There's just lots the the the industry is finance, right? Like it's all the offshore banks and everything are over here. So those are those are all the jobs So if you don't want a career in finance Yeah, you're probably just gonna leave as well because it's yeah, everything else is impossible to to get and

And and it's made worse by a lot of factors. But with teaching, I feel like if more people wanted to teach and the pay was better and the conditions were better, and you had more teachers with smaller classrooms and less teaching assistants, honestly, I feel like teaching assistants are just the whole idea of teaching assistants. I never had a teaching assistant when I was a kid. We had one teacher for our class, and our class was maybe 30 people, but sometimes not. But at my kids' schools now, there's two, three teaching assistants, but there's so much weird overlap between the teaching assistants and the actual teachers. And the teaching assistants are almost like saying that they're teachers, but

they're not, they're not trained. They haven't gone to school to learn anything about teaching. They haven't done, you know what I mean? Like these, these are people that have just, they're glorified, like, you know, lunch monitors or whatever that have just been given more to do, but not, they're not getting paid anymore. But it's, it's a bit of a problem when you have people, you know, it'd be like at the hospital, if the nurse was like, oh yeah, no, I'm a doctor.

It was like, no, you're not a doctor though. It wasn't a nurse, just someone that helped out when the nurse was busy. I'm sure you know how to do a lot of cool stuff or whatever, but you're still not the actual doctor. And I think like teaching assistants kind of, not always. I don't want to shit on teaching assistants. It's not a job I would do. And to some extent, I think it is needed, but like there's a lot of like weird politics involved, you know? And then in the end, you're just looking at it. You're like, why are there this school? You know, like they're constantly saying, oh, teachers don't get paid enough. There's not enough teachers or whatever, but there's like fucking a hundred people on staff

at this small school. And it feels like there's like four teachers or whatever. But there's like fucking a hundred people on staff at this small school. And it feels like there's like four or five teaching assistants in every class. So the right, so the teaching assistants are there because the schools have to take kids that previously would have been sent to like a special school. Yeah, that's, that's another big thing. They have to take these kids with behavioral problems. And I don't know if it's because the budget was cut to the point where these kids don't have a special school or the places are super limited in those schools. I don't know the details of it. Over here the places are super limited. There is a school

for kids that have special needs and some kids really do need it and I think those are the ones that are prioritized. They get to go to the school but they just will not open another one. I don't know if it's because they can't staff it or it's just too much or whatever. Almost certainly budget. But so the answer to the fact that, to be quite honest with you, from everything, all the teachers I know and have spoken to

and all the teachers that have emailed me, and I know a lot of people who have been teachers or who are actively teachers or retired, and every single one of them says that the classes are getting less and less manageable. That the kids are an absolute nightmare to get them to stay calm, to stay seated, to focus on anything. And it's getting very, very complicated to do that alone with a class of 30 kids is very challenging. I think we should just leave them to it. Do you know what I mean?

Like, maybe that's the way we do it. We just battle Royale it out. You know, just like, stick them all in a big prison complex and see which ones survive and which ones learn maths. I know you're joking, but I'm sure Flex, you've come across this as well, and I'm sure most parents have probably come across this, but in in your, in your, um, kids class, if there is somebody who, who does need a bit extra is disruptive or, you know, some people with, with like quite severe ADHD, for example, if they, if they have

a, an episode where something doesn't go their way or whatever, like, like my, my kids have had situations where this has happened and the kid is trashing the classroom, like throwing chairs, breaking glass, everything. And the kids are just trained to slowly shuffle out of the classroom and stand in the hallway until it's done. But this happens like two, three times a day. And you're just saying what is going on here? Like, I think, I think everyone is different and every situation is different.

And at the end of the day, like maybe it is healthier and better for everyone if these people are brought into normal environments and talk with other kids. So other kids learn how to deal with people like them, because they are going to have to deal with strange people their whole life. You're going to have to deal with people who, these people grow up and they exist in the world and they walk among us. And they were awful children and awful teenagers and awful people and learning to deal with them early on. And also normalising them and trying to sort of get them to be normal members of society. It's like being, it's like we're rehabilitating them in a school early.

I know, but I think they need way more than that though. I think they need people who know how to, uh, to deal with them and, uh, and get them through. It sounds like this one isn't being dealt with very well. I imagine that this isn't an isolated case though. This is happening all This is every school. Like some of the kids at these schools, like there was this one kid in my in my youngest year and he was absolutely out of control.

And I'm sure that every single day that he came into school, the teachers were like, here we go again. I mean, he would he was hitting kids constantly, biting kids constantly. And I mean, hard when your kid comes home with a welt on them and you say, what happened? They're like, oh, you know, little Johnny today, he was having a bad day. I mean, are we preparing them to deal with different people or are we preparing these kids to be victims? Because you're just saying, well, sorry, you just got to take it. Fuck off. I don't think these kids should. The moment the kid gets violent, you've got to do something. Fuck off. Yeah. I don't think these kids should. The moment the kid gets violent,

you've got to do something about it rather than just say, well, hopefully they'll be better tomorrow. One of these kids chased the headmaster around with a massive stick. Yeah. And was like whacking him and stuff. And my kid said that when she saw the headmaster later, he was in tears because because he was like, what am I meant to do? Like he was just completely frustrated.

Yeah. So the idea that, oh, maybe it's good to expose the kids to this. I don't agree with that at all. I think it's super unfair on these kids. They're like eight, nine, ten years old having to deal with these incredibly complex issues. And the government or whoever has just dumped these kids in these schools. It's it's awful. It's absolutely awful. Yeah, but there's no there's just nothing they can do.

There's no there's I mean, you can't. We managed in the past. You can't just. I'm sure we had the money for a school where you could put these kids, where you had people who were trained in looking after them. And now they just dump them in the general population. It feels like that. These kids don't get any better. Yeah.

And all the other kids get the shit kicked out of them. It's not fair. Yeah, they suffer for it because, you know, most, I think a lot, a lot of kids will just sit there and do whatever the teacher is, is teaching them, you know, they'll just quietly sit there and, and go along with it. And it's fine. But yeah, some of, some of the discussion, we're not talking about like, you know, the class clown here, you know, we're not talking about somebody who's just like, you know, doing fart noises in the back or whatever. We're talking like a major meltdown,

like actually quite threatening behavior and stuff. Yeah. And it's, it, it, it, it's pretty bad, but I mean, I mean, both of my kids that have gone through school, there's, there's been one or two in their years so far. It's no coincidence. And then you hear about it from other parents as well. Like they're, they're in a completely different year, a completely different class. And there's always one or two of them that are just every day. I think you know these. Well, again, each situation is different.

And I think some of these special education places are terrible and the conditions are terrible and they just are awful for everyone involved. I think a lot of the time it sounds like the adults are not equipped or even know how to deal with these people in the best way. And I think, you know, tons of kids are medicated, especially in America. Like it's a whole, it's a very thorny topic because you are dealing with a complex set of problems. And a lot of adults, I think, just assume they're a good kid and they're blind to the issues, you know, and they think that it will just, they'll grow out of it or you know... The thing is, sorting this out, the thing that always gets me is that this is the biggest

investment into the future, sorting this out. But nobody will ever look at it that way, because it doesn't make a lot of money right now. But what, what use is it not failing like any of these kids, somebody who has behavioral issues or, uh, or has some, some special needs of, of some sort and not being able to give them the best and, and help them. These, these are people that need to function as adults at some point, right? They're going to be out in the world. And if they're not sorted

out, dealt with, you know, given, given everything that they need at this early stage in life, they're going to be bigger problems later in life, right? Like for society, and it's going to cost a lot more to deal with them when they're not functioning as adults, right? Like there's already loads of adults that cost society so much fucking time and money when a lot of this stuff could have been solved a long time ago. If people actually just a generation ago, well, these people, these are, these are going to be the people that are looking after kids and the changes, but it can be broken and it is routinely. It's not guaranteed that bad people will breed more bad people.

But all of these kids are going to go on to become adults that do stuff. You know, like we're not, you're not going to be, I'm not going to be 75 years old and going to see my 95 year old doctor. You know what I mean? Like I'm going to be 75 years old. I'm gonna be seeing a doctor who's like 30, who is right now at school. You know what I mean?

Like it makes total sense to put more investment into this and sort it out so that in the future, things are better. But nobody's ever around for long enough to do it. And it always seems like it's such an aside, you know, the focus is always just on like, Oh, you know, how can we kill more babies in another country, you know, like, and, and plow millions into that billions into that, rather than just sorting out these, these things that really need to be sorted out at home first.

It doesn't make headlines, does it? It doesn't. That's it. It's much better to do. It's sad. And their kids as well, like the, I mean, It doesn't. That's it. It's much better to do cool pictures. It's sad. And they're kids as well.

I mean, for as annoying as it is when this is all happening or whatever, I feel bad for them. They're kids. They're not having a great time, are they? Constantly being yelled at, pulled around, pulled out of class. You know what I mean? There's got to be a better way to do this. But I guess it just, it always just comes down to money and lack of money and every, everything

that that, um, that feeds into that as well, you know, not paying people properly to do these like specialist jobs, not giving them incentives to ever even train for these specialist jobs. The whole thing just feels like a bit of a mess, honestly. And that's just like some brief firsthand experience with it. You imagine how some of the teachers and principals and whatever feel about it? Oh my God. Jason Vale Well, this is it. I think kids do lack, it depends on what age, but they definitely lack a certain awareness

of, and I think kids are very selfish. And I think that can persist through into young adulthood if they're treated like, if they're spoiled, you know, to be so used to having everything the way they want. You know, you certainly see it with, you know, teenagers go to uni who can't look after themselves, can't cook anything, are slobs. Like, I mean, our lives are the same, right? And I think a lot of us are the same. And I think that the history does repeat itself because we're doomed to, right? I've been watching a couple of these Turning Point documentaries on Netflix. Oh, I was, I'm turning point. I wanted the Vietnam war one. It's good. It's interesting.

Yeah. There's a good one about nine and 11. Oh, I saw that. It's amazing how many parallels there are with like today. Yeah. It's like, hold on, hold on, hold on. 60 years ago. No, hold on. Are you talking about turning point as in the conservative? No, it's a documentary, a Netflix documentary series, but they've got different ones. They got, there's a nine 11 one. There's one about hunting, uh, Bin Laden, I think.

When you said I've been watching a lot of turning point videos, I guarantee you quite a few American listeners. Oh, right. No, sorry. On Netflix Netflix there's a series of documentaries called Turning Point. Well basically they're called that because that's when that sort of post-war aura of the good government toppled and it's led to the government lying to the people and the lack of trust. It's really led directly to where we are now. You just see the idea of making decisions and political decisions about wars and things around election times and around so many awful decisions that result in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people are entirely to feed the egos of politicians.

And it's just, it's terrible really. And it does feel like history just is repeating itself. It's all the same bad actors though. It's the same people that learn from the mistakes, the past, you're doomed to repeat the same people 30 years ago that were just spitting the same old lies and nonsense. And they're, they're still around spitting the same old lies and nonsense. We've got this is real depressing podcast. Sorry. Sorry. Like,

I think it was, I think Shaka Khan sent us off on one. I think, I don't think we recovered from it. I was expecting flax to be like, man, I loved that Shaka Khan show. I was, I was ready think we recovered from it. I was expecting Flax to be like, man, I love that Shaka Khan show. I was, I was ready to, to, you know, through Flax's experience, enjoy Shaka Khan. I said, we're just disappointed. There's a lot of people doing good stuff. Yeah.

Um, yeah. Uh, do you want to hear some news? Yeah. Is it uplifting from loose news? Give us the most depressing news. Like, wait, wait, wait. Do you want to hear some news? Yeah. Is it uplifting? From Lose News? No. Give us the most depressing news. Wait, wait, wait. I've got a news article before we start Lose News.

I've got three real depressing pieces of news. Here's a quick flax facts to give you up a little a pair of teeth ahead of the Lose News main course. a T for head of the loose news, right? Our main cause is that this is this social, what do you call it? Like a sort of social media inspired game called Run It Straight, right? We just have two players, one with a ball, the other one with a tack that is the technically the tackler and they just run at each other as fast as possible. And a kid died in New Zealand of a serious head injury. Of course, this is the dumbest fucking thing that you can think of.

So yeah, don't do it. It's chicken, basically, is what it is, right? It's just stupid. I mean, at what point is the viral game gonna be running at a brick wall as hard as you can? Like, what are you doing? There's a lot of these ones where people hurt themselves. It's always been this dumb.

That is such a match show thing though. Isn't it? Don't rugby style tackle game. You can imagine that we're not losing anyone important doing, but doing that though, are we? So we'll just tell that kids probably not going to make it. It's a fucking idiot. Yeah.

We are. We want a mediocre podcast and between us, we've decided no big loss here. Yeah, no, no. So we got a section called, do I give it? It turns out not so much. Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy,

Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy, Deloy gym memberships, free therapy, these kind of things, right?

But this one is, apparently, some of the staff are being given a thousand dollars to spend on Lego and puzzles, meant to empower and support their journey towards thriving mentally, physically, and living your purpose. You know what would also help them thrive and live to their fullest and stuff? Just paying them a living wage would be good too. I mean, I think people that work there probably do earn quite a bit anyway, but. Um, so this thousand dollar subsidy, I guess it's like a bonus, but basically they can also spend it on kitchen appliances like blenders and refrigerators, going to spas, personal

portable cooling fans, and ergonomic or cooling pillows. So yeah, they can, or they could just spend, they could just buy one Millennium Lego Falcon. Nice. Star Wars. Yeah. Really nice of them. They earned $67.2 billion in profit in 2024. So good for them. That must feel great. Yeah. No shit. No shit. You work with money, you make money. Fucking hell. So the... In terrible news about awful things,

in terrible news about awful things. AI, Meta have an AI public feed, which is apparently a goldmine of accidental oversharing. A thread highlights the issue and shares some examples. Basically there is confessions of affairs, medical questions, legal dilemmas and tax records. Are these people admitting this stuff? Like thinking that... Yeah. All visible to anyone browsing the apps. Discover tab. Right.

So people are speaking to AI and telling them personal things. If you've ever shared anything personal with Meta's AI assistant, they are sharing it with other people. Oh no. Oh shit. with other people. It's just like, it's just that this is an insane list of things that people have. It's like my, your, your, I dunno, it's, it's, it's, it's, um, it's just chat logs with AI basically that are awkward. Okay. So this is all browsable. So someone, someone asked them, uh, you're supposed to be my wingman. Where's my big booty future wife at? Okay. And the Facebook

AI replied, you're on the hunt. Huh? Well, I more of a help you find your style kind of wingman. Uh, what's your go-to for meeting people in Oak Grove or West Lynn. And then he replies, West Lynn, is that the Cougar City? And then the AI app replies, West Lynn's got a rep for having some older, more established conditions, but Cougar City, that's a new one. What's your deal breakers for finding a future wife? And he says, are you trying to set me up with a Cougar? Do you know what I mean?

And then he's like, no Cougar's set up here. What are you looking for? And he says, big you trying to set me up with a cougar? And do you know what I mean? And then he's like, no cougar's out here. What are you looking for? And he says, big booty and a nice rack. So it's like, this whole thing. You think a lot of this can just be laughed off though, by people that just say, oh, I was just joking around with the AI. They're probably dead serious at the time as well, when they're chatting to the AI, trying to get like advice and stuff.

It's so funny. Oh my god. So that is, that's happening. And then Mattel, massive corporate toy overlord Mattel, have teamed up with OpenAI. This is like the fucking evil, like, the heel team up for, you know, ultimate bad guys, super villains. Toymaker Mattel are looking to develop AI products. So Barbie, Hot Wheels, Polly Pockets are using AI to create experiences around their games.

And I guess this just means, guys, we're using AI to do shit now to make art, to make, to replace stuff, to make fake games. Do you know what I mean? It's just a whole, it's basically the news is like, good, we're doing it and we're trying to frame it in a nice, we're trying to spin this in a nice way. But that's happening. And then- But you only made 1.3 billion last year. Nowhere close to Toilet and Douche. In the final bit of bad news, Amazon and Walmart are looking at teaming up to make their own crypto. Oh, right. Fucking kill us all.

For customers to use at checkout. Get rid of us right now. Eliminate us. Bring the bomb. So that is, that's Lose News. Kill me. Lose News. Thank you so much Lewis. Wow. That was great news. I've never felt so pissed off in my whole life. I didn't come up with, I didn't compile those ones, but then it's all very, uh, very interesting.

It's just, it's like, it's hot. It's hard to be enthusiastic and upbeat when it's so fucking hot. It is. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Sorry guys. We live in a country. Well, I mean, I live in a dependency of the country that you guys live in, uh, that prides

itself on complaining about the weather all the time. The net, the weather is never perfect. It's impossible. And, and therefore the national pastime is to just complain about all weather. Even on a nice day, you will still hear people complaining about it's too hot. I don't like this new stuff. I don't understand. Crypto and vapes and AI. this new stuff. I don't understand. Crypto and vapes and AI. Stop you bastards. I had a great conversation with my mother-in-law the other day about AI. Because she said, do you think, like, should I be scared of AI? Like, is it, is it moving too fast? Like what's

going to happen? I said, uh, I, not really. Like just it'll, it'll, whatever happens, it'll probably be pretty gradual and, uh, you know, whatever. And then we were talking about, um, TV, TV becoming in houses, you know, like cause she was, she's old enough to remember being a child, not having a TV in the house. Nobody she knew. We kept our television at the bottom of the garden. Yeah, very much like that. But it was really interesting because when TVs became the Norman houses,

so they were affordable enough for the average household to have a TV in them, she said, uh, immediately so many things changed because they used to be big family gatherings. Like on the weekend, they go out all together as family. They go do all these things. They would stay over at people's houses overnight because they, you know, had too much to drink and stuff and all the kids and cousins and everything. And she said it was like, you know, everybody just did stuff together all the time.

And then the minute they got a TV, nobody ever talked to each other ever again. She said, TV fucking rules. Everybody just sat indoors and just watched TV all the time. It's a shame nobody went out anymore. Like, I mean, don't get me wrong. People still go out. People still do all that stuff. But she said she noticed, like, especially like in her family,

it was just like, no, done. Everybody was just like, you know, like on a Saturday, they would normally go out and stuff and everybody be like, now I'm just going to stay home, watch TV. This is like in the fifties. People are like that now, but it's, it's been a long time. Plans for the weekend. Ah, my plan is to watch television. Wonderful new invention.

Full glorious technicolor. I say, darling, shall we watch some television? When it was just new, this new idea. Apparently, it was weird though, that if you think about it, that a lot of the technology gets much more quickly into the hands of the average person now, it feels like, than used to happen. Like, televisions in your home was like, holy shit. And now smartphones, when smartphones came out, pretty much everybody like they did these deals

where you pay this small amount every month and lots more affordable for the average person. So they go out and get these smartphones. And now, like everyone's glue, you can do so much on the nose. It's basically just having like a really powerful computer in your hands. Oh, it's a mini laptop. It is. It is. You can do everything that you would need to ever do on a laptop.

You do on a phone. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, look, lads, before our entire being electrocuted in the background. No, it's a reversing truck. There's a lot of sorry. Yeah. Which is it's reversing to electrocute this guy. It's the daily electrocution mobile. It's annoying, isn't it?

It's, um, oh God, he's going to hit that thing. He's fully going to hit the wall. Oh my days. This lad is, he's not a good reverse. He's going to have to go and do a little, little extra bit of turning. There we go. He was just driving into a wall. All right. Anyway, sorry. I realize that's completely. Look, look, here's a quick update. There we go. He was just driving into a wall.

All right, anyway, sorry, I realize that's completely... Look, here's a quick update. First of all, if you have anything to say about what we've spoken about in this episode, please do email me in. Love to read your emails. Keep them coming. If you're interested in the shopping lists, I've been putting them up on my Insta in batches of 10 with no commentary.

Make of them what you will. Should I found one the other day. I forgot to, um, to grab it. You got it. Or they are fascinating. Those shopping lists. The funny thing about those shopping lists, P-Flex is there always something really weird on always at least one thing where you're like,

what the hell is dog me? Yeah. It's like, yeah, it's like, it's like, you know, danger Dan. What does that mean? Like, what is that? I'd love to see a really specific one where somebody was like buying stuff, but they put the reason why they were buying it as well. Oh, you see that sometimes.

But the list is like peanut butter for my balls or something, you know, like that would be so funny. So my favorite is the one that's it's a, it just says one fags, pork pie, one beer. That's it. That's the list. Nice. I mean, yeah, it's so like, it's like they've decided what they, they've planned their day out. And I respect that. Man, I saw a guy in the store the other day by four beers and one pack of blueberries.

And he got up to the till and the lady was like, you know, you can get another pack of blueberries. It's like a two for one deal. And he was like, no, thanks. I just want one package. No, but it's two for one. Like you get one pack for free. And he's like, no, thanks. I just want one pack.

And like, cause I think he was literally just going to the park to like drink four beers and eat some blueberries, but he didn't want to. Four things of blueberries. Yeah. You want to lug around an extra pack of blueberries. Yeah. But yeah, so this one, the one that people really find funny and I like it is that when but you didn't want to throw things at blueberries. You want to lug around an extra pack of blueberries. Yeah, so this one, the one that people really find funny, and I like it, is that when they have the name of the shop at the top of the list, but you're writing the list to go to the shop, you don't need to then check the list,

where was I going again? Unless you're very elderly. I'm pretty sure when you set out to go to Aldi, you know you're going to Aldi. You don't need to write at the top of the list, Aldi. I just thought it was quite funny. And one of the things here is Earthly Sinus Relief. What is that? Awfully. So, alright, I will say this. My favourite thing to look for in all these lists is how many different ways you can spell broccoli. Turns out there's a lot. A lot of ways. And we all know what it is. Just put Brock. That's what most people do.

There's no A in broccoli. There's at least one double set of letters. Some people just put Brock Alley. I'm like, fair enough. I don't fucking know either. You're 100% right. I've seen broccoli misspelled in so many fucking ways. It's just one of those words that people are like, I don't know how many C's or L's or whatever. I'm just going to put Brock. Or just boss it down. I don't know what I mean, broccoli was spelled it so many fucking ways. It's just one of those words that people are like, I don't know how many C's or L's or whatever.

I'm just going to put Brock or just boss it down. I'll know what I mean. But yeah, I see a lot of people write espresso. Like, of course, all that kind of stuff. Yeah. Espresso pods. But the funny thing for me is as well, there's clearly, you know, the way you've got certain terms in your family for certain foods

that is like a shorthand and you know what that is. When I was a kid, what we called those sort of flat chicken steaks that are breaded and then you oven cook them, we would call that favorite chicken because it was our favorite. They're escalopes. I always say it's your favorite chicken. I get it. We called it favorite chicken. And when my mom would write a list, she would write favorite chicken. So when you see these lists, it's an, in a way, a little vision

into the lives of those people. So when they put dog steak, that means something to someone. You know what I mean? They know what that means. So I really like that story element. Dog steak. Give me some dog steak and some broccoli. We usually just get Heinz ketchup, but we went through a brief phase where we usually just get Heinz ketchup,

but we went through a brief phase where we were really into daddy's ketchup. And one time we had a listen, it said daddy's sauce on it, which was. You should make, you should try. You just put ketchup, just put all gold. This the South African ketchup, tomato sauce, all gold. It is the best ketchup I've ever had. And you can, if you use it for cooking as well, it's incredible. My boss at the grocery store used to call it catsup.

Like, yeah, that's the Simpsons line. Catsup is that Simpsons line. He's such a nuts. Like, I didn't want to say anything to him because I think he would kill me with his bare hands. Ketchup, ketchup, ketchup, ketchup. Yeah, it's if you if you find that scene, I don't know what the difference is between the book. I don't know what it used to be called Yes, we're the word comes from it must be German. Yes. It's simply an older less common spelling of ketchup, right? There you go. I guess he was just just an oldie worldy kind of guy

It's used to I used to work with him. He used to call it cats up. And I'm not even joking. I used to work with a French Canadian man whose name was Jongi, but we did not call him Jongi Tupperware because he was dangerous and insane. I would say, do you want to hear? Here's a recipe for you. James Meese, who was around in the 1771 to 1846, was an American scientist, horticulturalist and medical doctor. That's when people were just all of these things. So he, the first known tomato ketchup recipe

that he published in 1812, it has been around for longer than that, but this was the first published recipe. An early recipe for tomato ketchup includes anchovies and insects. Ooh. Okay. Not saying. Why? The thing is, like, if you don't tell them, they fucking love it. Do you mean they go ham for it?

They're like, oh, fucking love that ketchup. Yeah, it's like soiling green. They're lapping it up. Yeah. If you can, if you can spin it as well, if you can come up with a way to say it, like, you know, instead of insects, you say, you know, land shrimp, you know, and, you know, instead of like, what was the other thing? Cow brain? What was it? Cow brain? I've forgotten already. What is he saying?

What did you say? What did you say the other ingredient was that was disgusting? Rat tongues. Antivase and insects. Antivase. Antivase. Is it again? Antivase. Everyone eats Antivase, right? Right. It's not. It's something. I loveies. Hello. Me love them. Love and anchovy. Calm down. Who eats anchovies? Oh me. I was always told that nobody liked them. No.

They are gross. They're not. They're amazing. Ever had a kipper before? Hell yeah. Love kippers. Fucking hell. You'll start your dad.

But they're really good. Cockineel. Cochinil. Cochinil. It'sil. Coconil. It's a little winghead insect. It's a sessile parasite native to tropical and subtropical South America and North America. And they put that in ketchup? It's a colourant in food and lipstick.

It's E120. Used for everything, didn't it? Or natural red 4. All the sweets used to have it in them. Get it from the bugs. Oh my god. Add some ground up bugs to your ketchup. It really is.

You don't market it as like anchovies and insects. Oh, they're real ugly little red bastards. Oh, that's where they get the color from. Yeah, look, next time you just saw the red. Look, this is where it's come from. I've just put it in the disk or these little red bugs. Mm hmm. They're like little berries. Yeah. Well, turns out people been using them for a very long time.

Maybe that's because they look like little berries. But if you dry them and crunch them up, you get some. What happens if they're left to live and reproduce naturally? Well, then you get more. No, but are they like a like a huge pest? Like, do they bite you? I don't know. I don't know what a sessile parasol is. Climb up your dick hole.

I've got a whole nest of little red bugs in my asshole. Alright, here's what a Cecile parasite is. It's an organism that is permanently attached to a host and cannot move independently. Lots of marine organisms like bivalves, sponges and corals are Cecile and can be affected by parasitic conditions. So barnacles and shit. They just latch on. What are you going to do? Can't do anything about it.

Interesting. You ever see the bottom of a boat hull just covered in barnacles? Yeah. They're fucking weird. There are weird animals here, but you know, they're meant to be on rocks. You put a boat in water, they're like, well, we fucking live here. We don't know the difference. I'm a barnacle. I suppose. They get to travel the world that way as well.

Yeah. There's a sessile oak tree, which is a classic species of big oak tree. And it's a good insult. I know there's one called the fuck tree, which is in Hampstead Heath where they fuck against it. Gay people fuck against the tree. Right. Fuck tree. It's a fuck tree.

It's famous. It's been fuck tree. It's famous. It's been, yeah, here you go, look, it's been established in a gay cruising area and it's famous for its slender trunk. There you go. You know what I'm gonna do? Next time someone is being lazy, I'll refer to them as cecile. That is a good insult, cause they'll have to look it up. God, those little bugs look gross.

Little red bugs. You cecile wastrel. There's the fuck tree, look. It's like... Oh yeah, it looks like a Shays Long. Oh, Hampton Heath. Yeah, fair fair. gross. Little red bugs. You sessile wastrel. There's the fucktree, look. It's like... Oh yeah, it looks like a chaise long. Oh, Hampstead Heath, yeah, fair fair. It's more of a chaise long.

I did see on Reddit, someone posted that they walked into the gent's toilets at One New Change, which is a sort of shopping area in central London, right near Bank. And it has restaurants and some high end clothing and stuff. It's like a mini outdoor mall kind of thing. It's got multi-levels. This guy after work, he was there and he went to use the toilet on the top floor and he walked in and there was just a bunch of lads in there. And they all sort of turned to look at him and he was like, just went to urinate. And then they just got back to wanking each other off. They just stopped to watch him piss and then they got back to it. They just stopped to make sure he wasn't like, you know, gonna be an asshole about it.

And once he just clearly got on with his business, they were like, right, back to work lads. Just wanking each other off for having sex in the toilets. Big time. And he was like, it was quite shocking. And they'll do it and they'll look at him and think, oh, you want to join in? Cause you know, more than Marriott. In a way, it's very, it's very accepted. It's very open.

Yeah, you just turn up. I hate to have sex in a public toilet, you want to lend a hand. You can. I don't even want to shit in a public toilet experience pleasure in one. Right. It's weird to me. Yeah, it is. It is.

But equally, you know, imagine having sex in a, in a Gatwick airport toilet. You know, I just, I think, I don't think I'd be even able to get hard. I think my dick would retreat back into my body. Like there would be a hole there. Like, what about an airplane toilet? Like in an airplane toilet, you're in the plane, you're at 35,000 feet. Yeah. I don't feel like they're that they're pleasant to be in either.

Really? I try to avoid them as much as possible. Air when I'm on a plane, my I feel like I'm pressurized, like like in the cabin and my silences are all painful. I'm all fucking dizzy and even fully stand up in a in an airplane toilet. Like I have to crouch a bit. It's awkward. They're not comfy to piss in one of those. Also getting into them sometimes you have to like a bit. It's awkward. They're not comfy to piss in one of those. Also, getting into them sometimes you have to like open that door that sort of

cantilevers or whatever it is accordions. And you've got to sort of sidle in there like this tiny cupboard because God forbid there's any space to breathe on those fucking plane. Yeah. Just fill it with seats. And guaranteed there's somebody waiting outside to get in after you because they're quite busy. So anything that you do in there, any little smell or anything you leave in there is, is

leaving a lasting impression on the next person coming in. And you know, like if you're sitting on the plane, the pressure and everything, I don't know about you guys, but like I'm full of farts. So if I get into the bathroom, I'm going for it. A lot of the time I feel like I don't poop on a plane. I don't poop on the plane. I've never pooped on a plane. I go to the toilet thinking I'm going to poop, but it's just farts. I don't think I'd be able to, I don't even think my brain and body would be able to work together to

accomplish a poop on a plane. Like it just, they're both completely doing their own thing. Maybe it's a pressure thing. Fuck me. If you lived on a plane for your entire life, would you ever poop? I don't think so. You'd land, it would all come out. Depends on the plane. Like it's an hour and twenty into the podcast. That's why we're talking about poop.

Maybe a luxury private jet I would poop on. But no, I wouldn't poop on like, you know, Pan Am flight 125. From Düsseldorf to New York. You know, Pan Am flight 125. From. Honey, I booked our holidays. We're going to Pan Am. I would hold it in. Pan Am flight. Oh, man, they've been out of business for 40 years, I think.

Pan Am. Yeah, a long time, man. I think I think it was the I think Lockerbie kind of finished them off, right? God, yeah, maybe. Lads, we've got to stop this. It's an hour and 20. You know what we should do? We should do what Ludwig did with his podcast and we do two hours on the second hour. You got to fucking pay for that's how you make the money. Is that, well, people didn't get their value out of the first that I'm saying.

I think listeners from this is not worth it. We had to make up for it a little bit. Well, yeah, it is. Thank you everyone. It's good to see you for it a little bit. Oh, man. Well, yeah, it is what it is. Thank you, everyone. It's good to see you. Good to see you. Good to listen to you. Yes, talk to you. Yeah. See you next time.

Yes, see you next time. Bye.