Triforce! - The Great Triforce Rebrand | Triforce Mailbag #71

Episode Date: April 29, 2026

Triforce Mailbag 71! It's time for a big Triforce rebrand, we try to uncover a house-move mystery (they were probably spies) and missing peoples cases (also spies) and the difficulty of making (and keeping) friends as older men. Pyrion's also been working on some (maybe controversial) voices. Won't someone just hire him already?! Exclusive $25-off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/TRIFORCE. Promo Code TRIFORCE Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickax. Hello and welcome to the TriForce mailbag. I might be sick this episode. He sounds sick, maybe he's not actually... You put it on. I'm not putting anything on. I'm not putting anything on, Mom. I can't go to school.

All right, who wants... I'm going to read you subject lines and you can choose which email will read. Right. I think that's a good way to do it. Sure. I'll give you three options. Okay. Alert the lawyers.

Right. Bodybuilders are for nerds. And no sense of smell. Choose one of those three. Oh. Or you could have all three. Alert the lawyers sounds like the winner for me. Alert the lawyers made me flinch when you said it.

Okay. Alert the lawyers. All it is is, are you guys aware that you three triangles are now forming the face of Callaway's latest driver? So this is from Tom. It's a picture of a new ad for the Callaway Quantum Golf Club. And it says featuring Triforce. So that's why we apparently need to alert the lawyers to the fact that they're using the term Triforce. Do not alert the lawyers.

Do not alert anyone. We stole it. We didn't steal it. We used it. We used it before Nintendo copyrighted it. It's a known term. Nintendo have copyrighted TriForce. But we've been using this for 10 years.

When did they copyright it? Maybe they did it 10 years ago and they were just like dragging their feet a little bit, getting the product to market. Hopefully, we haven't been sued yet. It may happen. Couldn't Callaway be sued for using the term Triforce then? Well, no, because we don't have a trademark. We can't sue the Nintendo.

Nintendo could, right. So that's my point is if Nintendo doesn't sue Callaway, right, for using Triforce, but they sue us, we could say, well, A, we've been using it before you copyrighted it. And B, why haven't you sued Calloway? Yeah, we can, we can. Oh, but hang on, they have, Calloway have put the hyphen in like we are supposed to. Try-hyphen force. Shit, we might be in trouble. What would we have to, what would we rename the podcast to if we had to do that?

hyphen force. No, but what if they copyright try hyphen force? What about three men and a baby? And then we get like a somebody's baby as a mascot. No, that would be you. That's the Callaway podcast. The Nintendo Callaway podcast. Yeah.

With TriForce. I love that. What about like, like think of a like a duo and then make it into a trio. Like what about Bill and Ted? and Fred. Or like Beavis and Butthead and Buttface. Like I just add another person to like to the duo, you know, like iconic duo with a next with another person in it.

I like that. That's funny. George Jerry and Kramer. We'll write in. Fuck it. Yeah. Please don't do that because we'll get a million emails. Like it's hard to do a mailbag when all it is is.

New names. I want to hear new name ideas for this podcast. Fine. Fine. It's 10 years. It's time to change it up. You know, you've got rebrand. This is what all the cool kids are doing.

Everyone rebrands Pflex and they get a new burst of life about it or they die. We'll just wait and see if we get sued first, right? We don't need to rename. We don't need to rename. Rebranding is always a... Yeah, but it's always terrible. It's like when a major brand like Coca-Cola says, we're going to change our name. You think, all right, why would you do that?

Look at the most recent big branding, Facebook and meta. What a fucking disaster. Yeah, and what about WWF into WWE? That didn't do the many favors. And they tried to sue WWF. Jokes. Jokes. All right, this is from Matt.

I'm going to read the bodybuilders one anyway. I was talking about the bodybuilders at Birmingham when I was at the NEC a couple of weeks ago. And I was surprised that some of the big lads were coming up and saying hello and that we're into games and stuff. This is ridiculously common. I've been bodybuilding for a few years now.

I've been in the scene and space with bodybuilders, powerlifters, strong men. They're all massive gamers. Or they love anime. It was probably the biggest shock to me. So just know, when you see a big, strong fella in the streets, he's probably thinking about Naruto with simple men. There you go. Thanks. I love the, I like that bodybuilders play games because when they sit at like everything is small for them because they're huge, right? So when

they sit at their little computer desk and they have their little computer mouse and the little keyboard, it's like, you know, it's like this big, big burly man just like sitting on like a, like a clown car or like, you know, it looks. It's like when the Hulk is doing science in the lab. Yes. Yeah. He's got his massive lab coat on and he's using this tiny test tube. You think, wow, that must be tricky. Yeah.

I love that. That is a beautiful image. I think, honestly, you're probably right. I think, in fact, these guys, these gym guys, they get up early. They go to the gym for a couple of hours. And that's their exercise done for the day. They're just basically nerds for the rest of time. Right.

Yeah. How many hours is a couple of hours? Like, what are we talking to? Two. It would be a couple. I don't know how long and many hours in the gym you need to do every day to maintain, Mr. what's this called?

Mr. Strong. I suspect if you're, if you're being that big, you're probably doing a session, maybe two sessions a day with eating and a break in. No,

I don't think, I genuinely don't think it is. I think you've got a, you've got that time for your muscles to like grow and heal. You can't be constantly pumping iron. So you think that those lads that are absolutely enormous

just go once a day. I think might even be once every other day. Oh, I don't think so. I think they're there every day. I think the reason they're into gaming is because they're so sore from all the exercise that they just have to sit there and their thumbs they can use or they're a mouse and keyboard they can just about use, but I think they're in agony. I'm like the opposite.

I'm not sore from gaming. Like I got like RSI, I got calluses on my ass cheeks. Like it's insane. Do they watch anime while they're pumping iron? I joke. Maybe they must do. Does that like go super cyan or whatever is? Yeah, exactly.

Does that like inspire them to do? do like a curl, some kind of curl. Yeah. Which one is the one where it's over 9,000? What is that one from? That's, uh, that is Dragon Balls, isn't it? So yeah. Yeah.

Jacket Bulls Zed. Dragon Balls. Yes. You were going to go to the gym this morning. Is that correct? Yes, I was. But I don't feel well. So I couldn't.

That's the thing. What kind of session were you thinking of doing at the gym today? I'm back with my personal trainer. I'm giving that another go. Try and get into that. I'm very sore from Wednesday. I went on Wednesday. I'm really, everything hurts.

Because the first time back, after a while, for the first couple of weeks, it's just going to be pain. I was looking forward to today, no problem. But then I woke up and I had a really bad headache and I'm clearly coming down with something. So I had to call in sick, which sucks. Maybe you're allergic to the gym. I'm allergic to any form of hard work, I'd say.

Yeah. Anyway, this is from, this is from Sophie, the owner of a gaping vagina, especially now. She's had a baby. So actually, she had a C-section. Rewind to mid-January, where I found that my best. was going to have delivered by C-section. This is when we were talking about AI a lot at this time. I was full of nerves and adrenaline. I said to my partner, please take a photo of the moment he's born because there's no way I will remember it in this state. Fast forward to that night, I'm on my own.

Partner wasn't allowed to stay. With my baby asleep next to me. Yeah, with my baby asleep next to me. The fairy moment. Yes. And I think to myself, hmm. Of the baby. Hmm, I was right. I don't really remember his birth. I think I zoned out because of how surreal it was. I know I'll have a look at the photo my partner took. So, I understand. Unlock my phone, tapped on the photo, only to find that he appeared to have eight toes on his left foot and the foot of perhaps a gorilla or some other primate on the right foot. I would send said photo as it isn't, I wouldn't. I would send it, but it's not appropriate, so they haven't sent it.

It turns out my particular Android device, a Samsung, there is an automatic photo enhancing setting called intelligent optimization, which means that when you snap a pick, AI will edit the photo to improve its quality. But being AI, it can't do hands or feet. Of course. The other photo I have of my son being born is forever ruined. Of course we have other photos, but this was the first ever photo. I am so sorry, Sophie.

My mind is blown. That sucks. That's sad. AI ruins something else. What a surprise. Yeah. Wow. Well, I mean, look, there was this, there's this funny sort of gap.

I don't know if you guys experienced this as well, but back, because did I tell you when we were clearing out the loft of this house, we found a load of photo albums of the old owner? Was it like, was it, was it like, was it? Was it like really ancient pictures of like the owner, the previous owners of your house, like, posing with like Hitler and stuff like that? Oh my God. Was it like a big discovery?

It was just like stuff from the 90s, you know, when people had to get photo films developed, you know? And then it sort of changed over to everyone taking pictures, bad quality pictures of their phone for a while. They're posing with Yuri Geller instead of Hitler. There's this, obviously we don't keep physical, many physical copies of photos nowadays, right? No. Sometimes people print them off on the wall. You know, you've got a few pictures on your wall of your family, haven't you, in various ages, since. Yeah, yeah.

Which is cute. And I think, like, I encourage that kind of thing for sure. Thank you. But it definitely feels like, you know, I mean, we had to do something similar for my nan. We actually went ahead and printed off a load of pictures and made a little photo album. So she could see that, you know, it was kind of good for her to have something physical kind of. Yeah. But, but, but like, there was this period of.

time when I've basically very few people have any pictures of anyone because there was this time when everyone was uploading all their photos to Facebook, right? And then that sort of stopped because of, I don't know, all sorts of horrible. It was just a lot of creeping and privacy and issues with that. Where did people not post pictures to Facebook anymore? Is it just all means? Obviously, I don't know, it's changed, hasn't it? It's changed. And I think it's not, I guess pictures were a lot more precious and a lot more. A lot more. You didn't know what you were getting as well. Remember, you took a picture and you didn't know what it was going to look like until it was developed.

Yeah, everybody's eyes were red or people's eyes were closed or whatever. You have to make more effort to take photos and remember these occasions. And you didn't sort of see them until afterwards. And I think even now you don't look through photos unless you're, I don't know, changing a phone over or something. Then you think, oh, I better hope my camera role is updated. But I've got these vast gulfs when I changed phones and didn't back up my phone. I don't think I have any photos from like 2012 through to 2015 and then 2017. I kept 2019.

I just don't have any photos from like when I was in New Zealand at all, you know, stuff like this. You didn't get any pictures from when you went to Japan. Well, of course, I've got hundreds of pictures, but I, my, they're gone. They're gone. What do you mean they're gone? They're in the cloud somewhere. Well, I think they were on one of my phones that I then replaced. They're probably in the cloud somewhere.

You didn't back up your pictures to something like Google photos or something? Well, like, but the thing is exactly. Exactly, which one did I use Google Photos nowadays, but back then, I think I was using something. Apple? I had an Apple phone for a while. Yeah, so they'll be in the cloud with the Apple stuff. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't use Apple anymore. I don't have Apple login. I don't where it is. I can't help you. Well, that's just, I'm all out of ideas. Sorry. No memories for you, I guess. Anyway, carry on. Right. All right. This is a very short email. She'd try on my force till I podcast. That's it. That's the whole email.

Thank you so much for that. Keep up the good work. Moving out in a hurry. This is from E. Last couple of episodes got me thinking about Lewis's move and all the weird moving out stories. So this is from March. Back in the 80s, my mum and grandparents moved from Vancouver's to Vancouver Island. On moving day, as they pulled up to the house they just bought, the previous owners were still in it. The old woman was at the sink washing dishes. The old man was out working on his tractor. My family knocked, and without a word, the couple grabbed their car keys and left. That was it. They left everything. Their dogs, their cats, horse, chickens, vehicle, half-finished

projects, food, dirty laundry, dishes still in the water. What? The only real exchange was the old man telling my grandpa, he'd always wanted to get that tractor running. My grandpa did eventually get it running and fully restored it. A lot of what those people left behind is still on the property to this day. 40 or 50 years later, nuts and bolts still sorted in the old fellow's tobacco tins and so on. Maybe they were spies or something and they just had to like move immediately.

Like no questions asked. You know, don't take anything. Just go. So if that was the case, why would they wait for the new owners to turn up? Maybe that was like the symbol. Like that was like the cover or something, you know. It's like make it seem like kind of realistic, but you got to get the fuck out of there immediately. You're compromised.

Do you think that's likely to happen on Vancouver Island? What are they spying on Vancouver Island? Probably nothing. Like I'm just, I'm just trying to think of any reason why people would act like that. Like that's bizarre. I could think of a few reasons. But do they just have like another life like set up already where it's just like, oh, we'll just leave this one and just transition into the next one perfectly.

I can think of a few reasons. Number one, they're both moving into some kind of assisted living situation where you can't bring shit with you. Maybe. It's literally just like, no, don't worry about it. Number two, they were planning to kill themselves in a joint suicide pact. And they were like, we won't need any of this stuff. Seems less likely, maybe. We'll just get in a car, drive, and then we'll just, I'll pop a hose pipe in the back.

I'm inclined to believe the spy story more so than that one. Really? Okay. Yeah. You know, I did read some saying that there were quite a lot of spies that live in like, Midwest America where all the missile solos are. Yeah. And their whole thing was to, as soon as they heard a launch, they were to call a phone number and say the nukes are on their way or something.

Like that was their job. Yeah, right. Because the early warning system that the Russians had was just a satellite that's in a geosynchronous order that's looking back towards America. Right. And it's looking towards the rocky mountains. And the idea is that when you'll see the nukes as they enter all, but you'll see them at a distance coming up, like the, the flares from the rockets.

So the rocket's red flares The rocket's red glare The red glare, sorry Gave gave birth to the light That the man was still there I think is the lyric to that He's still up there yeah He's still up there

Where's Lewis? I'm here I'm just drinking tea Oh I'm just thinking maybe they got raptured That's a good That's a good But God told them to sell all their affairs on earth Sell the house No he didn't even

He was like he's like I hope you're ready because I'm sorry for the short notice But it's rapture time baby And then next thing you know, it's just a pair of smoking shoes out in the field. Damn. Would you, if you were left behind, because there was a show called The Leftovers, I think it was called, where 2% of the population of the Earth vanishes, like 100 and something, a million people goes overnight.

Yeah. And my friend, you know, Suns fan, he's like a dovercaster. He's always telling me to watch a best show ever made. And I looked at the summary of this show, and I was like, 2% of people died. I mean, that would be a disaster, obviously, for the planet. But it's not so much that society wouldn't change immeasurably. Oh, my God, we've lost 2%. Oh, God, that's it.

It's all over. It's not apocalyptic enough for me to be actually interested in it. Because it's just going to be people sitting around wondering why they were left behind. The answer is, you're a fucking sinner. That's right. What if you, what if you, like, high-rolled that, like, like a crazy madman and just all of your enemies disappeared in an instant. But everyone you liked was still left behind.

Oh, man. That'd be crazy. Well, okay, there's a lot of really, I'd have really enjoyed that series, by the way, the left-upes. I watched it a couple of years ago, and I thought it was great. So a couple of seasons long, each one explores different people who've been affected by people leaving. People vanishing.

Sorry. Yeah, it's great, actually. I really recommend it. So I think it's subtly, it's a subtle bit of religious propaganda. Right. The idea is even to watch it. Well, that's a big part of it. It's got Christopher Rekulston as like a reverend in it.

And a lot of people join the church, you know, believing that it is that. You know, it explores all the reasons why this happened. Do we ever find out why they left? Yes, they did, you do. Okay. Well, spoiler, was it God? Was it God? Was it aliens?

No. Was it aliens? It wasn't God. Or aliens, no. Really? What was it? Was it like loss where they were like in proletry or something? I don't care.

If people, just fast forward 30 seconds, if you listen to this podcast right now, you don't want to spoil the leftovers. How does it end? What's the deal? Well, basically, one of the characters does, who loses herself, whole family, she becomes obsessed with finding out where they've gone. And she does eventually find someone who can send her through where they went. And she goes on to the other side.

And that place had had a 98% loss, effectively, right? Right. And so it's a very different world over there. And then she comes back. That's the very final episode of the whole thing, the way they talk about. The show isn't about that. But that's the coolest part. Well, you, I think you are wanting, what you're wanting is a cool fact and a cool scientific.

You want a black mirror episode. You want a cool twist or an ex-a-old. I want a cool story that has a cool ending. You want one episode, but this is more of a long-burning thing about people and how. how they interact and how they get on. I just don't think there's anything cool about somebody vanishing, you know? Well, it's haunting. Like, certain people imagine, well, listen, P-Flax, imagine if, imagine if you lost your

wife and both of your children. Right. And, you know. But that's not what happened in the show. This would be me losing one person out of the, out of 50 that I know. Well, no, but of course, it's not even, is it? Some two percent, it's not two percent evenly split. Who would you be willing to lose?

Whatever. Lewis Brindley of the answer. The point is that some people are affected. much more than others. There's a whole town called Miracle where no one vanished. And then obviously that's a place where people flock to

because they think that if this happens again, maybe this town has some secret to it that will keep them safe, you see. So, you know, buying a house in Miracle is incredibly expensive kind of thing. Like, you know, it's that sort of vibe. And they have like a gated community

and all these refugees outside. It's this whole weird, it imagines a weird, a world where people have been confronted by this very strange thing that science can't explain, that religion can't explain that no one has the answer to. And people's loss, you know, because everyone's... But it's just going to be people moping around being sad for three seasons, isn't it? That is it.

Yeah, so fuck you. I don't want to watch that. It's good. Honestly, the left over is great. We went down a rabbit hall recently with disappearing people. And because you remember like in the 80s or maybe... maybe not in the UK so much or Europe, but like definitely in NA, like in the 80s, used to have missing people on the back of milk cartons,

used to be posters at the bus station for missing people or whatever. And it was always a little bit chilling to think like, you know, somebody had been kidnapped or just disappeared. You never saw them again. Yeah. But there's more recent sort of examples of that happening, like some, some big examples, like obviously like Madeline McCann. And there was that young lad in London that went missing.

It was like 17 years ago, I think. I can't remember his name. He's a little kid that had a slip knot t-shirt and glasses. He was like 14 years old. He went to the bank. He drew out all of his money and bought a one-way ticket to central London and is just never seen again. Yeah, terrible.

But apparently, like, thousands of people every year just completely go missing. Yeah. And are never seen again. What the hell happens to them? Like, where do they go? Some of them kill themselves, genuinely. I think a decent number kill themselves. A decent number just want to start a new life.

They're sick of everything around them, so they just go start a new life. Well, they've got massive debts or massive problems. Even if you kill yourself, you're likely to be found at some point. It'd be tough to kill yourself and place yourself in a spot where nobody's ever going to find you, right? Unless you're just out in a swamp somewhere, I guess. Exactly, yeah, you just go miles away. I don't know. You go into weight yourself down and jump into the fucking tens.

I'm not saying that I think that there's like, you know, something afoot here or whatever. I certainly don't. I just find it. Are you suggesting alien abduction? No, I'm absolutely not suggesting that. I'm just saying it is such a bizarre thing to me that people will just completely vanish and you'll just never see them again. And the difficult thing with that must just be never getting any closure. Like, you just don't know what happened to the person.

You don't know if they... It would be a killer. You'd be constantly thinking they're going to walk in the door. But also, you'd just be on edge all the time because you think, what if they just come back? You're like, what if they turn up? You know, like, we don't know if they're dead or not. You'd assume that they are. But like, you know, to not hear from somebody for years and years and years.

Oh, it'd be fucking crazy, wouldn't it? Yeah. Yeah. So... All right, we got an update request. This was for you, Lulu. This is from Amy, long-time listener. The Just Chip story from episode 82, so going back away.

After the 25-minute story complaining about how awful a whole experience was, Lewis stated in the most British way, I wouldn't mind going back. So we'd love to know, if he became a repeat customer, apart from that jingle jam visit to Just Chips, and I wondered if the owners ever listened to the story, rest in peace, Just Chip. So did you ever go back to Just Chip? Is it gone? Yeah, it's got long gone. Shit.

Well, they only had one. Well, it died during COVID. Yeah, but they had that gigantic array of sauces. I don't know how they failed. You remember that thing? I never went. Oh, man, you missed out. Every sauce you could imagine.

And it was all like on display in this gigantic machine like on the wall. It had like all these like tubes and squeasy plastic things and stuff. It was incredible. It was, it was heaven in there. I did. I mean, I went. I went plenty of times. I think I was one of the only people propping the bloody place up, honestly.

It, yeah, when they went bankrupt, they did put like a sign on the door saying they were looking for investments. And I very nearly rang up and thought, I'll pay to keep just chips going. I reckon it's a good best business. That's such a crazy thing, though, isn't it? Like to actually say, we a chip restaurant are looking for for investments. Like that's got to be like the biggest red flag ever, right? For somebody who is looking to invest in just about anything. Like unless you're just trying to scoop a place up as a front for like money laundering or whatever.

But like, but otherwise, who the hell's going to invest in that? That's crazy. Well, Lewis Brindley, the Yogska. He was considering it. Yeah. Maybe well, Lewis might have wanted to launder some money as well. Well, he could have just. lost some money.

The quickest way to launder it. Well, I've lost more money than that doing stupider things than investing in a chip restaurant. That's true. Well, this is on the most recent episode, that's 3-4-8, but I don't know if that is the most recent, but that's what they're referring to. We talk about aliens, Twitch streaming, and Mission Impossible. On my walk to the gym, I was listening to episode 24, and between the 10 to 12 minute mark,

you say those exact same topics back to back to back. We talk about aliens, Twitch streaming and mission and potters. It's pretty crazy. Follow up. P.S. please unblock me on Instagram. I'll stop sending bold and British memes. No, I will not unblock you.

You sent far too many. I remember. It's going to happen. I mean, this podcast has been running for 10 years. So every year that ticks by, there's even more of a chance that we're going to repeat ourselves, which we have done a million times. More senility. And probably talk about the same.

That's what we should call it. A combo of topics back to back to back. Senile force. Yeah. It was tough. It's tough getting the... Oh, it also can't be asked. We don't keep track of what we talk about.

We don't make notes. We don't plan. We just sort of turn up. I mean, I'm stood today in my kitchen because there's a man upstairs. Right. Doing a loft. There's a man upstairs, right. The man.

I've not got a room set up with a desk still. I've been in this place for three months now. I'm still got... I'm on a laptop on a kitchen table, you know. I'm just thoroughly... Does the inside of your house look like Tony Sopranos house from the hit HBO series of The Sopranos? Does that have like a kitchen island? Hasn't he got like a really nice house?

The house does not look like that. For New Jersey, yeah, I'd say it's pretty nice. My house is like a falling down cottage thing, rustic cottage. My mate lives in New Jersey. He's got a gorgeous house. Yeah. They just got space to build them out there. They got a lot of space.

A lot of hurricanes as well. like, New Jersey there is? Yeah, there was that hurricane a few years ago, wouldn't it? The whole place was underwater. Jesus. What's their government? Chris, Chris, Chris, what? Chris Fatso, they're governor, that guy.

He was, he was out there complaining about it. I remember. Chris soprano. Christopher. You mean Christopher. Yeah. You mean Christopher. Christopher.

Yeah. Whoa. Wait, forget about it. Before we continue, if you're looking for the perfect. gift for your mum on this mother's day. Why not check out aura frames? I've got one and my mother has one. It's very cute. I've noticed that she does upload pictures on there and I upload pictures to her frames so she can see what I'm up to. It means that those memories don't always just live in your head. It's a nice to have a physical object on the shelf that goes through. And I think

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off their best-selling Carver Mat frame with code Triforce. That's A-U-R-A-Frames.com, promo code TriForce. You can support the show by mentioning us at checkout, Terms and Conditions Apply. On with this show. Hello, lads and hello dads. I'd like some fatherly advice,

despite what Lewis says, he's the co-father of the Yogs, so his advice would be just as appreciated. Right, look, I understand. I haven't been through the trials of dadness, really. No. I keep saying I feel like a dad now, but I'm not. I haven't earned it, and I understand that it is wrong to even put myself on the same pedestal as a dad.

That's not, you know. I would like, I am more of a... Like an honorary dad. Colt leader. Like the honorary police. Cult leader is better. I'm more like a cool, sexy cult leader. Yeah, I think that's better.

Also, let me ask with you. Saying it's tough to be a dad, it's very easy to become a father. All you have to do is have sex one time with a lady, okay? That's difficult for some people. You say that's easy. It's much easier than being a proper dad and raising a kid, I'll tell you that much. So don't just give it to give props to any person who's ever sired a child,

because that's the easy part. The hard part is actually giving a shit and looking after him. So I hate to hear people brag about all the kids they've got when they fucking don't even know their names. Yeah. I just had an end-of-relationship-level fight with some very old friends. If you know the relationship needed to end, and it's in everyone's best interest that it does, what's next?

I'm sure there's some amount of listener going through their first pruning. What advice do you have? So the question is, you've got a friend group, have a massive bust-up. Could have been about anything. It could have been about something that, you know, someone owes someone money. Could have been a, you know, we're all sharing a house together. We've all had a massive falling out. could have been about politics, could have been about anything.

How do you deal with losing touch with a friend group or abandoning a friend group? Presumably, you have to move on and find new friends. What's your guys' advice for that? Yes, look, okay. I read about this the other day. I mean, I've sort of heard about it before. There's like the idea of there's these, the four horsemen of relationships, have you heard about this? No.

There's Dr. Julian John Gottman predicted divorce or separation with over 90% accuracy with these for toxic communication styles, right? Right. And the first one is criticism, attacking your partner's character rather than specific behavior. You know, say, you always or you never, that kind of stuff, right? Like the other one is contempt, which is really destructive. Oh, God. You know, where you're, you're showing your superiority, superiority by being disrespectful or sarcastic,

name-calling, eye-rolling, that kind of stuff. Defensiveness, which is, you know, never taking blame, always acting as the victim. deflecting blame away from you to avoid accountability and then stonewalling, which is obviously withdrawing from interaction or shutting down, acting indifferent to avoid conflict. You know,

obviously the contempt is the most serious. And these aspects you do, you have to be very careful because it's not just in a romantic relationship. These can happen with people and also with family as well, right? You can have these negative experiences with family and you should notice them happening if you're doing them either subconsciously or, you know,

probably harder to notice if you're doing them. Well, but a lot of people don't realize what they're doing until they're confronted with it directly. And you can still knowingly be critical and contemptuous and defensive and Stonewall, even if you know about these toxic traits, right? It doesn't stop people from behaving in ways that they have behaved for sometimes years. And so I think when it comes to friend groups, it is hard to make new friends. It is just to find friends in the first place and find people you get on with. But I think throughout life, you are always meeting new people by doing things and making new friends by doing things.

Certainly, I think, like, in the past 10 years, I've met more people than I thought I would and made new friends in different ways. you know, some people have come back into my life like Sparkles, you know, and we've become friends again. Some people have moved away or, you know, I haven't hung out with as much. Or people like Russ from, you know, board games, charts and counters. We went away to that country house together. That was really great. I don't know. It's strange. Sometimes you don't realize that a new friendship is forming until it's already fully blossomed. So I think, no, I'm definitely more positive about it than negative. I think that do away with negative people though. Like, you know, if you're getting into

these, if you're noticing difficulty and stress and struggle and anxiety dealing with certain people, sometimes you can't avoid them because they're family. But you can probably. I think there's. I think there's a lot of people like cutting off family now, especially like in more recent years, like around like, you know, political things. or whatever. You hear about a lot more, right? Where people have just, like, gone no contact with family. It's definitely it feels bad, right, to cut off family.

Because it feels like we've been taught by so many much media and things that you should always try to, you know, rekindle your, you know, your family are your friends by default, I always say. Like, you know, you can't, you can always fall back on family. But they're not really necessarily guaranteed friends. They're kind of like, they're just, you know, blood friends is a kind of strange, you know, thing to have a safety net for, right? Like, you know, it's always, there's always somewhere you can call it an emergency. So it's always worth keeping, at least on speaking terms with family,

if you can avoid it. But I think, and it can be a big stressor as well. You can always feel like, oh, I really don't want to cut off this person who, you know, is, it's been good to me. But actually, as I get older, I care a lot less about that. I'm a lot more selfish than I was. And I think that that makes me feel a lot less stressed about these things. Like, I don't know. I could talk about some stuff, but I think it's probably best not to because it all personal and, you know, but sometimes you, you, you, you're caught in the middle of two people as well, right? Like you've got one person who's up. That's called a threesome.

Oh, wait, sorry. Yeah. That's what I've been, I've been in debt. Again, P-Flex is a very different. courts are set up. Working at it. I don't know. So,

no, get, be aware of how you, how people make you feel because you don't need people in your life. You make you feel bad. Exactly. If they're not bringing that much to the table or they're, they're,

they're, they're takers and they're not, uh, not givers and, and things like that. You got to weigh it up. You got to, you got to rationalize it.

It's it, everybody's different. Everybody has different thresholds for what is acceptable and what isn't. And some people, Some people will... Some people will roll with the punches more than other people will or whatever, but you have to do it's right for you. If it's not working for you or there's deal breakers or whatever,

you just got to, you just got to cut them off and then move on. And if you're feeling like you're in a place where you're like, well, I haven't got enough, I haven't got enough friends to get, you know, to handle not seeing this person, then, you know, just think again. Because you can probably just DM someone else or send a message or WhatsApp someone you haven't chatted to for a while and go and hang out with them instead. Like honestly, the amount of people who are just interacting with people because they get messaged by them, right?

It's like, oh, people think that their friends are people that message them. But really, you can make new friends by messaging other people. Yeah. You don't have to just be, I think people are passive because it's easy. But I think that people who are active. are usually cultivating a better outcome. This is very, this is called friction maxing, which is a new thing. Friction maxing is doing the difficult things in life rather than taking the easy route.

And thereby finding some piece, for example, actually reading a book instead of listening to the audiobook, cooking from scratch instead of buying a delivery meal. Going to the gym? Well, yeah, anything where you think, I don't know, it's easier if I just do X, take the harder route, take the friction, reach out to those friends, put the time in rather than go, That's just easier to hang out with these toxic assholes that I see all the time because they're around the corner rather than travel for half an hour to see some actual decent friends. I would just, yeah, friction maxing.

Yeah, I like it. I'm not exactly friction maxing, but I feel like I am. You are because you're very busy. You're a busy man right now. Anyway, let's not get too down. Don't get too down. Lately, I have been trying to do things that need doing before actually just slacking off. Sorry, Sips, go on.

What are you going to say? I was just going to say, like, as you become an adult, things change a lot in terms of like relationships with people and stuff like friendships change. I find like now people that I was that I was friends with like as a kid, you kind of tend back to sort of like, oh man, I wish we could do this. I wish we could do that or whatever. But it's like stuff that you did when you were like 14 that you just you you can't do it now. Life isn't like configured for like those things to happen anymore for you and for your your group of friends from then, right? So like, I find like, uh, like we're, we're in touch kind of, but like the, like people in

my, my, my, my, my friend groups from like when I went to school or whatever, some of them will be more in touch with each other just through things that they still do. You know what I mean? Like, uh, like, say somebody is like big into biking, like, uh, like two of my friends are still big into biking. Like they just like biking a lot when we were kids and stuff and then have, just do a lot of biking now, like as adults. and they're closer because they still do that together. You know what I mean? Like they just,

they have like some time every week to just meet up and do that because otherwise they would just do it alone sort of thing. You know what I mean? Right. So it's like sometimes you see that and you're like, oh shit, why don't I have a friend like that? But it's probably because you're not doing the same things as your friends.

Like if you're into something. I genuinely think that there is a, it's not necessarily about biking. Or if it is. It's about, like, it's both, right? Like, I think that people who get into hobbies often stay with those hobbies because of the social elements. Yeah. To some extent.

But, you know, but I think that that, and that's those, if there's strong social interests within that hobby, it ties people there more strongly. Like, I think it helps to, it positively reinforce a hobby when it feels like it's something, A, that you're good at, be that, you know, it's rewarding to you and see that other people recognize it and they're nice people. Like, it's a positive reinforcement cycle. I think people can get very put off by a hobby in the same way if the people that they're doing it with are not nice or not welcoming, right? So, yeah, I think it's both. I think it's the classic idea of, you know, come for one reason, but then stay for a different reason. Yeah, it's, it's weird. I think like, um, you like people that I've worked with that I've kept in, in touch with or whatever, I think it, I think a big part of why people

would, uh, like, stay in touch more so than just like the, the sort of like, oh, hey, what's up? What's new? How are you doing? Like, like, check in every once in a while is, is basically through hobbies or like stuff that's not to do with like, uh, you know, like your, your regular everyday life. Right. Like, uh, like people. I, I, I, I, I, know people that are closer just through sharing interests at the same level. You know what I mean? Like, like, I've always gamed a lot. And I have a group of friends who are into games, if you like, but not to like the extent that I am. So like, I tend to talk to people online more because they, they are at the same level of being obsessed with games that I am sort of thing. You know what I mean?

Like I don't have, I don't have real life friends that that come anywhere close to being obsessed with games like I am. Right. There is, this is a really common, I watched, okay, so one of the videos, one of the games I've been playing over the last couple of months is Opus Magnum, which is a game that came out in 2017. It's a Dachronix, coding sort of slightly moving molecules around game. It was a bit of these games, but I really enjoyed it. And they actually, it was one of the only games that Zactronics, that published actually did quite well. And so, and they sort of shut down Xctronics last year. you'd, wasn't it?

I think this was their bestseller. Anyway, they published a DLC for it last month, which I've been playing through. And I was like, it turned out of the blue, but I was just like, amazing. But I just watched a video this morning before we did this podcast. And it was this guy talking about how when he had his kid in 2020, he really got into Opus Magdum, and he joined the Discord. And they were all sort of competing each other. And it looked like it was the same small group of people who were obsessively playing this game.

and competing with each other and, you know, trying to, and they formed like a little friendship group of people who liked a similar thing and liked the challenge of one-upping each other in a kind of very chill way, right? And I think that is a mirror of millions of other little groups that form, you know, around a certain thing or hobby or person or event or whatever, and they stay in touch and they get a kick out of whatever they do. And I mean, I even used to see this like years and years ago before Yogs. You know, back in the day, I used to play a game called Subspace,

which was a Virgin Media, I think, made it something ridiculous. It was basically like asteroids, but online. And I played it for a while. And then I sort of came back when it was, you know, the community took control of it. This was in about the late 90s. I mean, the community had taken control of it at that time, because it was abandoned in the 90s, you know. And they had a community of people playing that game.

And they're still going now. You know, 20 years later, there's still like a little community around these tiny little game. And it's, there's a lot of things that make it sticky, right? It's one people feeling a little bit like they've, they're one of the best people in the world at it. You know, I think that this video I watched this morning, this guy, basically he went and found he accidentally

had a world record on one of the opus magden puzzles, right? But a specific mode of the puzzle. And I think that made him think, oh, my God, I'm good at this. I'm a world record holder. And then that fed into him going down into this rabbit hole more and being more passionate about it. And I think that you tend to find that when someone's given a feeling of purpose, they are willing to, they're really incentivized to.

just to get a kick out of staying within that world, right? And you'll see on board game arena, each board game is played by one person, and that's the only thing. You know, you look at their game history. This guy plays like seven games of terraforming Mars a day, do you know, or seven is a small number, you know?

And he's played 7,000 games of terraforming Mars. And that's his whole fucking life, but he's also number one in the world, and that's a good feeling. I guess, yeah. No, but I mean, but like, you know, if you're, If you have, if you're interested in something at that level, you will, you will immediately

have a community that you can join. You know what I mean? I think it's deeply satisfying to be, and deeply rewarding to be in those little groups of people who are yeah, can be. Deeply knowledgeable about stuff. And it's, it's something you can share. And I don't know, feel special about in a world where we all feel, you know, like drudgery, you know, That's kind of, I'm feeling like we're useless and inept. I do this like a lot. And just through being like, well, I found like just from being on, on something awful all those years ago.

But still, it's still like a kind of like an overarching thing where like you dip into things, right? Like a new league of POE comes out. I'll dip into it. A new expansion for WOW comes out. I'll dip into it. But like, in an overarching sense, I always know that there's people who are going to be mad into it that I can

just join immediately just through being a something awful member, for example. You know what I mean? I know there's going to be a goon guild for any of these games that I'm going to just spend a month or two playing because something new has come out for them or whatever. And there will be people there that have not not stopped playing the whole time. Like they are the, you know, the, the, the, the lifers or whatever. But it's always. nice to come back and and hook up with those people again because you're just like feeding your more recent obsession. But for them, it's just they're doing it all the time kind of thing. I do that a lot, though. I dip in and out of things. But like mostly around games, though, not

real life stuff is a bit more difficult. Familiarity is nice. It's why people, people, like, I read this thing the other day about the office and people say, I can't remember, but they say, like, do you watch the office? Not have you watched the office? As if, as in like, as in, Yeah, they never stop wanting. It's like a peaceful thing. It's like applying that you constantly are watching it back to back. And people do.

And I think it's one of the most rewatched things on. It is. I don't know if it's like an immersive thing or it's like a feel good thing, but people just like the setup of the characters. It's a great show. Yeah. It's very familiar. Me and my partner watched all of it.

And, you know, when it came to the end, we were almost like out of loss. We were like, well, what are we going to watch now? Because it had become this kind of routine. Fuck me. Yeah. Did you watch the American? one I take it because it's the UK one is on watchable

that fucking episode where he has the he has them over to his he has them over to his house and he's with with his partner and they got that small ass little flat screen TV mounted on the wall yeah he's got like that kitchen TV that is he's really proud of it

episode was incredible that whole I know like so much from the whole nine there's so many good episodes there's so many good episodes so many good episode anyway so there you go some hope for people that have lost their friends, you can always acquire new ones. Sorry, if like, I don't know, we ramble a lot.

Sometimes we're not deliberately going to be funny on this podcast, and that's just how it is. All right, so here is an orange wine, orange wine, which I remember I said that I felt like, fucking orange wine. Not again. The dark truth. The dark truth. Yeah. It's not a particularly dark truth.

I'll be honest. For a long time, your podcast has made me feel as though I'm out of touch. You talk about things which I've never heard of. 6-7. Gooning. The bathwater auction. But after listening to this particular episode, I changed my mind. I am not out of touch.

You are chronically online. Orange wine is a staple of London's pubs and clubs. The fact you've not heard of it, but have heard of a robot which only makes spaghetti, should invite you into introspect. Ted, you are no blue Ziphos. Do not lose touch with the common man. I like how I'm left out of this one completely. Like, I think people have written me off.

If it doesn't appear in your garage just by coincidence, then it really happened. I think this is related to what Sips was saying earlier, though, in terms of responsibilities, right? Like, you have, you get drawn, you get, I find it a little bit with Yogs too, right? Like, I've got certain obligations I have to do at certain times of the year. And they, I haven't got a choice. You know, I can't just say, I'm not doing it. Well, I can. I guess I can, but it will be a bad idea to do that.

And so that sort of stuff pulls you along through life and takes up a lot of your time. Sorry, are we still talking about orange wine? Well, we don't go to London pubs and clubs. I don't go to many pubs and clubs and look at the menus. If I go to a pub, I go up the bar and I order a rum and coke or a cider. I do love going to a pub, though. I wish I had the inclination to do it more. I don't drink wine, but if I did drink wine, I'd probably have a wine that I like,

and I order that wine. I've never, I'm never saying, oh, what's this thing on the menu I've never tried? Well, if you show me the wine menu, sir. Right. I just don't. I've never done that. You know, when you go to the pub and you go up to the bar to order, and someone asks to see the menu, I'm always a little bit horrified that you don't already know what you want.

Precisely, like, the barman would be terrified. I'm always like feeling like, you know, I'm, I'm, like I shouldn't even be in the pub. But that's because you still have a sense of I don't belong here about you when it comes to the box. 100%, which you shouldn't have because you're a grown-ass man and just get in there and order a pint of bits up.

But we all feel like a grown-up. I go in there and I go, scotch on the racks. That's my big one. That's what I like to do. I think I'm never going to fit in. You will. The problem is you worry you're not going to fit into the point

where you just don't relax. You just need to relax. and just hang out. That's how you fit in. Instead of worrying about whether you're fitting in constantly, just relax. Go with the flow. All the oldest sayings are the best ones. This is from Anna. This is about Blood on the Clock Tower, baby, which is your wheelhouse. Okay. You love this. God, Lewis loves blood on the Clock Tower. No, this is not a Clock Tower. This is not a question. Love watching The Yorks play Blood and the Clock Tower. And Anna and her partner have come up with some new roles that you might

like to try. These are Yon's car specific. Oh, love it. Let's hear of them. Yeah. Role number one. The pervert. Okay. Each night, the pervert looks through someone's window and learns if they interacted with another player. Wow. Okay.

There is a role a little bit like that called... The lawyer. Don't worry, but the once per game, the lawyer can save someone from execution, but only if that person has been voted for by the group. So if the group votes to kill someone, the lawyer can step in and save them once per game. Right.

The double agent... But what they have to... No, they just lawyer it up. They just come in and say, No, no, my client is innocent of all these charges and is free to go. So it just cancels a town vote. A vote, yeah. That seems really strong.

Very strong. But it would also, if the lawyer was pretty convinced that the demons were leading a vote, they could save an innocent. You know, that's a good funny role anyway. The double agent works exactly like the spy, but is a good player. They must pretend to be bad and pretend to be the spy, so they don't give away their double agent status should be in play with the spy for maximum. chaos. I don't know what the spy does. I don't want this to

turn to it to half an hour of blood of the clock tower chat. Well, the spy knows everyone's role. So a good spy would know who the demon is and be able to say this person is the demon. But the thing is, I guess the way it would be ruled would be if they said I'm this, if they gave away that they were the spy. So a little bit like the damsel. Maybe the minion could

say, I think that Sips is the spy, the good spy, the double agent or whatever. Crucially the spy is prepared at any moment to just leave their life as well. like everything in situ just leave the game that would be great

in future in future just send these things directly to me don't fucking send into the mouth that general general questions about

yox content I don't want to be talking about this on trifos like he wants to assemble his clock tower council to

well here look I'll just forward it to you and then you can fucking read this there you go like like you know questions about

content and yox cast and YouTube and stuff we'll do that another time. Like this ain't, this ain't the place for it. You know? I want to hear about apologies, Anna. Thanks for drawing. I fell into a volcano.

Thank you. Those are such good ideas as well. They were really really good. All right. This is Ernest. Ernest is a West End actor in London, so the actor in the West End. I'm an actor. Oh, Ernest. Yeah, in London. And have been since around 2022. I've been in an array of different

shows, but currently in a play called Shadowlands starring Hugh Bonneville. Later this year, I'll also be in Death Note the Musical. Wow. No way. In London, as of writing, the casting hasn't been announced, so I'm sure if that bit can be read out yet. Okay, well, hold on a second.

Death Note, the Musical. At the Barbican. Tickets are available. Looks like it's... So it's been going about 10 years already, apparently, in Tokyo and stuff. So people do know about Death Note, the musical. Are you aware of Death Notes?

No, I don't know what it is. It's an anime, Sips. What, what am I aware of? Death Note. Death Note. I've heard of the anime death note, yeah. Isn't it that the guy writes in a piece of paper and then they die? And then they die.

Correct. Yeah. It's a classic gateway anime. Get my pen here. Lewis. And then they get into anime. There we go. Wow.

Yuri Geller. Yuri. Again, a wonderful word. reference to Yuri Geller on the tip of the time of every listener. I want that motherfucker gone. All of our young listeners are Googling Yuri Geller. Who the fuck is Yuri Geller? Whose peak was the 70s and 80s.

Yes. But in our memory, still a great punchline. Very relevant. Very relevant. He's 79. There you go. I'm more than happy to ditch the dirt on anything you may be curious about in this line of work. For example, how you get auditions, what additions are like, what celebrities are like to work

with, but wouldn't want to pressure what you guys would like to chat about. All of those things, Ernest. All of those things. Blacks wants to know. Yeah, like, give us some anonymized... Yeah, tell us all about some tales. You want to hear like some big diva stories. Yeah.

So do things like one actor, let's say, whose name sounds like, Mimothy Malamere. Do it's like that. Mimithy Malamere. Yeah, could be anyone. Do that. Yeah. Yeah.

We want to know. We want to know. We want the dirt. We want to know. know about the behind the scenes. Milosimé's Botox injections. Does it help to have a vast network of good contacts? Or can you just like kind of seat of your pants luck it out or what?

Like what's? Tell us about it. I want to get an audition for a play. I reckon I could do it. I want to get an audition for some voice acting. I think I'd be really good at that. Be really good at doing voice, voice acting in a movie, like an animated movie or a video game. No.

That's why I'm saying this. Get me in. I'll do it. Flax would be really good. I'll fucking do it. Flacks be great. His comedy voice, he could just do the whole

cast of characters. I'm working on a new impression because I was inspired by someone else's impression, which is a lot of impressions, a lot of impressions are actually, someone has come up, I've said this before,

someone has come up with the impression and everyone copies that. Right. Because it's just, that's what's funny. So it's kind of inappropriate, but now that he was in the episode, Steam files. I think he's fair game.

Stephen Hawking, right? People are working on Stephen Hawking impressions. Of all the people you could do an impression of. He was in E-Files, man. He's fair game. Okay. This is the relevant modern-day impression that you're learning. That's a good one if you could do it.

Right. Way off. From the pack, okay? Let everyone else do that and you should concentrate on doing like a Chomsky or something, you know? Like someone else who was mentioned. Yeah. Get like a big Bill Gates going. or something, you know.

No, I haven't even got the voice down yet, so I couldn't do it. Like, I know that there's some trick where, because, you know that, you know, Rob Bryden does that voice where he does a man in a box. Yeah. So it's kind of like, you're going to have to change where your voice comes from, so it sounds weird. So I can sort of do the man in the box. Let me see. So, hold on.

I'm going to fuck this up a few times, we'll just be with me. It's like, we can cut the ones that don't want. Hold on. No, no, don't cut. This is all about this. Hold on. this is a man in a box I don't know if you're here

this is a man donging in a bun get me out of ear I'm going in a box so it's like that wow that's really good it sounds like Rick and Morty so or something

it sounds like you did something like to your mic or your audio set up like it was that convincing that's where it comes from yeah it's from the very you're not breathing out

you're speaking by letting the tiniest amount of air right in the back of your throat if you do it if you practice too long you will get dizzy so be careful at home. Is it coming out of your nose, that sound? No, it's not coming.

Lewis, I'm going to. That's incredible. You're holding all of your breath in your upper chest. So Stephen Hawking would mean something like that, where he's being like a robot. Maybe. I see what you mean. It's got to come from a different place.

Yes, because otherwise it doesn't sound artificial enough. But hey, I'll work on it. I'll work on it. If people think of Stephen Hawking impression is inappropriate because it's making fun of people with the disability, let me know. But if you think it's him specifically, it's him specifically, and he's in the files. He had an iconic sound, though, remember, like he almost had his own. Yeah, it's Stephen Hawking.

It's Dr. Spatzo by Creative Labs. Have you ever heard Dr. Spatzo before? Remember Creative Lab sound blasters, audio cards? You remember? But nobody remembers Dr. Spatso. Okay. Well, it came with a disc with a program called Dr. Spatzo by Creative Labs. And it was text to speech.

It was the first text to speech that I can remember. I mean, this is like 1989, maybe 1990. And his voice sounds exactly like Dr. Spatzo to me. I mean, maybe I'm wrong. So just to be clear, just to be clear, the references that we've had this week, I'm amazed we haven't slotted Liz Heurley in it all. But Dr. Spatzo. Is she still dating Billy Ray Cyrus?

I think so. Another very old reference, Billy Ray Cyrus, Elizabeth Hurley. It never ends. Fucking Yuri Geller, I love it. If you're older and you listen to this podcast, you'd be like, man, these guys, they've got their finger on the zeitgeist these lads. But if you're young, you'd be Googling a lot. I'm going to start talking about Ulrika Johnson in a second.

This is, I was talking about guns. and the AK and the M16 and all those kind of guns. These are some the worst guns. Someone has emailed in this is Tobias, the worst guns. And they've got interesting little stories about them. The PM63 rack, a Polish gun, a very early submachine gun, intended as a sidearm for tanker crews. One problem was that the slide, which is a bit that bangs back and forth when you fire the gun,

was so vigorous. It would hit soldiers straight in the teeth. So the Polish soldiers nicknamed it, The dentist, which sounds pretty scary. Oh, God. How do you say the dentist in Polish? The pistol at the distensky. No, I'm just making that up.

It sounded. Cobra company's the ladies' home companion. I like to think of myself as a ladies' home companion. What is that like a small revolver like that you would put in a purse or like under your pillow or whatever? It's a, it's from the US, a semi-automatic handheld pistol firing rifle rounds and a rotating magazine. It weighs four kilograms. Is that like one of those ones you could put in your sock? You know, like people get like an ankle hole. This thing. This thing weighs four kilograms. It was, it was handwounds. He had to handwind this thing. It's like a crossbow.

It's not exactly one of those Agatha Christie purse murder. No, like a Derringer or whatever. This thing is huge. It's like a cannon. It's like a hand cannon. It looks like one of those things that you would fire CS canisters with if you were an oppressive regime. What that freak? The ladies, the ladies' personal projector. The lady's home companion, I'm bizarre. The Torres 24-7, Brazil, designed for use by law enforcement,

it had a major flaw that led to over a million guns being recalled in a massive lawsuit. The Brazilian coppers suffered several misfires into their legs, their butts and their feet from running with the gun while holstered. So with the safety on and in the holster, it would still fire just by shaking it a bit. What's this called? Jesus Christ. The Torres 24-7. It's live 24-7.

Exactly. It looks like just a regular old CS Canter Strike gun, doesn't it? A lot of these guns, they'll look and be fine, but they'll have some really, really bad feature like the safety doesn't fucking work. That's all this is really bad. Yeah, they'll just...

The RPG 76 Comar. This is another Polish classic. This time they have the offer of... That sounds like a bad one to go wrong. Well, what if you just had an RPG rocket? But without the launcher, the Comar is an RPG on a stick, ready for any man, woman, child, elderly person or dog to repel an invader via an easy point-the-boomstick stratagem.

In 2022, Poland gave away the last ones they had lying around to Ukraine. It's unclear if they ever put it into you. So the RPG 76 is just a one-shot point-and-shoot RPG with no barrel, which is pretty wild. Holy crap. Yeah. That is insane. And finally, the Krumlaufe, which stands for a curved barrel in German. This is a World War II era attachment for the Sturm-Gaverer, 45.

which is a curved pipe you put on the end of your rifle is like you shoot around corners which sounds ridiculous and some of them even had periscope so you could have a peek what if you, what if you reconfigured it

and then shot yourself with it you were like you were pointing forward but it curved around and just shot you in the face two would have attached two down it. A big loop de loop

like a hot wheels looped loop but it's gun you could like you could shoot and it could keep spinning like particle accelerator oh that would be so good they're closing CERN down for I think it's four years

by the way because they're out they got too close they got too close to the truth they're onto something yeah they had to that would have caused the leftovers shut it down that's right shut it down god damn it no they're upgrading their magnets

to some other new thing so it's going to be able to go even faster I fucking handbagged that was a big thing for a while in media that's the CERN people were sort of you know it was going to tear a hole in the fabric of time to like go through a portal.

Send a medieval night into modern day New York, fall in love with Meg Ryan. I'm sure it's unlikely. But the point is, they can't say definitively, no, this won't destroy the planet. There's a chance that this is something that's never happened before. Like, no one's ever done this experiment before.

We're doing it. That's wild. That's really cool. But do you know what's going to happen? No, not 100%. So, you know, just putting it out there. Now they're upgrading it. Maybe they failed to open the hellmouth previously,

so now they're committed. Maybe. Maybe they'll open up, maybe this will be really good for us. Maybe it'll open up like an interdimensional shortcut that bypasses the straight of Hormuz. And then we can get, we can get back on top, baby. It's going to be great. Oh, yeah, stop burning that oil again. Yeah.

That sweet, sweet, sweet oil. I ain't going to burn itself. Well, it is actually. It catches, burns and stuff quite easily, doesn't it? Shit. Yeah. Fucking. Fuck yeah.

Fucking. Okay. Amazing. Great podcast. Yeah, I really enjoyed that one. Thanks so much. Good ones. Good emails. Thanks, lads. You guys, you guys, you guys are all right. You know that? It's funny how these podcasts, we, depends on our mood, doesn't it?

Sometimes we're in a very silly mood. Do you ever finish podcasting? You just feel like shit. Like, you can't, you can't quite put your finger on it. You just feel like shit for like the rest of the day. No. Yeah. I think, I'll be honest, I thought yesterday. Yesterday's was, was, was the episode recorded yesterday was, was I would say, was one of the, we didn't really get into anything in particular.

No. It was kind of a bit meandering. I think if it goes quick, that's a good one. Whereas this one, this one dragged. Drag? All right, well, thanks for listening to the mail, very. And keep those messages coming in. Bye, everyone.

Bye.