Triforce! - Triforce! #122: Our Strange New Habits

Episode Date: April 15, 2020

Triforce! Episode 122! We've picked up some strange new habits in our continued lockdown! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please play responsibly. Hi. Okay. Hello, everybody. Welcome back. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi.

To the Triforce podcast. Hi. Hi. Hi. High energy. High energy this morning. That's what I was going to say. Yeah.

Hi. That's how we should start. Just a kind of tentative. Hi. Hi. You're right. Okay. Like you're meeting someone and you're not sure who they are.

Well, this is how it would actually be. It'd be like this. Hi. Because you have to be further away. Okay. Like you're meeting someone and you're not sure who they are. Well, this is how it would actually be. It'd be like this. Hi. Because you have to be further away. Yeah, two meters away. You've got to be two meters away. We're about socially distancing very well. I mean, it's over 100 miles to Bristol.

I'm sure it's more like 170 maybe to Jersey. We've been doing it for years. Something like that. Yeah, we've been practicing. We were doing it for a long time. We were born for this. long time. We were born for this. We were. We were ready.

So, we're in week three of the lockdown, the time of recording. Yeah. It's started to get to a few people. A few people go mad. Some people are going nuts, yeah. I had a bit of a wobble the other day, but it was just because I hadn't gone outside for quite some time. Because you're not really meant to go outside so i just haven't been going outside like less than normal so i i thought you know what i gotta get out i gotta go out and i gotta like

play some frisbee with my kids or something you know what i mean so i did that and uh i felt a lot better for it yeah it's amazing how much nature going out into nature. I read a study this week that said that people who spent more time with nature had higher happiness and higher mental intelligence. You've got to get out there. Their brains actually were working better

and had more energy. Sometimes it's like an investment. You put a bit of time into that but you get more time out of it as well yeah i get really sluggish and like slow when i'm at home all day maybe it's like a hibernation thing i don't know 200 miles 200 miles to jersey from my house so we're not supposed to go out um but you know they cut they did did say it's okay if you have your daily exercise, which I obviously never have. So I wonder how life is for people who partake in the art of dogging, like public dogging.

Hobby on hold. I wonder how that works out now. There's got to be like a secret underground resistance of people sneaking out to do things that they would normally do outside of course yeah and well dogging must be one of those things how the hell are people buying drugs like for example they have to you know they got to go out and it's like you know it's hand to hand as well there's no two meters when you're buying drugs so like you know there's definitely going to be some people out there it's a good i think that's why they've had to put in

some laws now right to say they've given cops uh more abilities now they uh to to arrest people when they think that they're breaking the laws of quarantine stuff and they've over here they arrested three people and one guy they arrested just for sitting in the park, not exercising. Wow. He was sitting on a bench in the park. There's got to be more to it than that. I don't think they just swooped in with the helicopter and cuffed him. They've got nothing else to do.

I'm pretty sure they would. They probably walked up to him and they're like, excuse me, sir, what are you doing? He's like, fuck you! You know, probably dragged him in off the back of that. This whole thing really has brought out all the little hitlers um who were in their little fields and you know all those awful ceos and assholes and all those sort of people who are running companies and getting on skype and just being dicks to people i don't know do you mean or like laying people off and but also there's this whole thing which um about

being only only doing essential things or buying things that you can you know you think are essential i talked about this last week but there's been a lot of reports of people like like people complaining about easter eggs like going into corner shops and being like you can't sell easter eggs or like being behind someone in a shop and saying you can't buy an easter egg or literally shop assistants being like don't you can't buy this because it's not essential mate it's not essential i bought a couple the other day you you think you think you're gonna die if you don't have that easter egg mate yeah you think that's essential dear people are dying out there you're eating a fucking easter egg how's that make you feel

yeah you're a dick aren't you mate that's what they say that's what they like they're they're like i mean we're not living in like bear grills stuff like essential right what is essential it's obviously different to other people i think avocados i can't i like pretty essential for my for my happiness and my health well nobody's gonna stop you buying that in fact you'll probably go and you'll find that nobody else has bought any because they're gross so exactly yeah but i'm not bear grill no you're not yeah all right shut down saison priest what's wrong with your own piss just drink that well just shut down the water that's not essential is it mate everyone could have a few weeks without sharing it won't kill them it's like we're not trying to fucking like everyone's but there's this there's tons of little hitlers out there all in their own little communities being dicks for some reason well i mean that existed before the quarantine as well

for a lot of people that's just their nature you know and it's like it's a shitty nature to be sure but um you know it's's just, I guess now you're, you're, you're more likely to run up against them sort of thing, which is, uh, which is unfortunate. Nobody,

we are in a, it feels like that, like, obviously if human life is sacred, um, don't get me wrong. I want, don't want people to die.

No. Before I say what I'm about to say. Oh, here we go. Laying the groundwork, just tilling the field before he sows like seeds of it does it does feel like a lot of people are um are not overreacting but but like i said being unreasonable um on the grounds of it's killing people jimmy like like if you're if you go

outside um you know to walk your dog or whatever, you're killing people. Do you know what I mean? People are dying because you were so selfish that you had to go outside. And it's like, it's kind of, I get it, right? We need to guilt trip a lot of idiots into not going outside because they're having parties still. And I walked through town yesterday and it was a nice sunny day because we're having parties still and you know i you walk through i walked through town yesterday and it was nice sunny day because we're having this sort of mini heat wave and the fucking there's loads of people out loads and loads of people out like like everywhere there's tons of

people all over the place enjoying the hot weather and i'm like well i'm not gonna that they were they were all keeping their distance from each other yeah there was some little groups you got your little ticket book out and you were like walking up to them hey well well well what's this then you start writing the ticket yeah so you've got an easter egg there that you're sharing is that essential food i think you could live off some dry wheat a bit that you've got in the back of your cupboard sir nice um do you know what i mean like anyway so so that's the thing but i also watched um i watched the big short this week oh it's a great movie which is um a great movie about the financial crash of 2008 and some of the people who saw it coming and there's this one kind of kind of

character in it who i think supposed to be based on a real guy it's brad pitt's um character and he is like a doomsday kind of guy sure um who's gone off the grid a bit and one of the statistics that he quotes i don't know whether it's true is that um you know if if unemployment rises by one percent forty thousand people will die they'll commit suicide in america and i i think it's more to do with just people when they've lost their jobs they get less money and they can't pay their mortgage so they get made homeless or they get you get less money and they can't pay their mortgage so they get made homeless or they get you know they get um they can't pay for proper food and proper diet so they struggle or they're they're they're in i don't there's like hundreds of impacts of this

this this that happens yeah yeah and so in a sense like what i'm saying is fucking if the shops are i'm on my feeling is if the shops are open and they're selling shit, you shouldn't go to that shop and not buy a fucking Easter egg. Just fucking, it's right there next to the other shit. You buy one at the same time as essentials though. I mean, if you're really struggling, you need to get around it. Go and buy like, you know. Buy some milk.

Go buy a bunch of milk and then just like sneak an easter egg in there as well and then when they look at you they're like just say it's just a guilty pleasure you know just like you you gotta make light of some of these things you know you can't you can't let these people you have to keep yourself mentally healthy because i think sometimes like you know this this is this is impactful too and And also, let's keep the Easter egg. I'm saying the Easter egg industry is going to buoy up our economy. Oh, yeah. What goes out there and buys an Easter egg right now?

Big Easter coming into full effect. Yeah, like big eggs. The egg lobby. In these troublesome times. Very overpriced. The thing with the coronavirus and the lockdown and everything it's so wide reaching and and so all-encompassing like it affects everybody and i feel like it's all i talk about these days and it's it's the same thing over

and over and over and over again as well so i vote let's talk about this new video game valorant have you guys seen this? You guys seen the new Riot shooter game? No, I haven't. Valorant. It looks like a mobile game from 10 years ago. Right. I don't understand the hype.

I don't understand why. Is it Overwatch? It's Overwatch with CSGO elements. So it's like a cross between the two. Everyone on my chat keeps asking you want to play further never i'm never gonna play it there was over a million people watching people playing it yesterday and it i i just don't get it i feel like i feel maybe like i'm old and i'm just missing out on something or whatever but it just looks so utterly unappealing so you play csgo all the time p flex and you play overwatch every day you two are the target audience for this right but here's my point those games are are like they

they look good and they they they play well and they look like they look like big budget titles this game does not it it just looks like a free to play chinese game right like people say 10 years ago it's like csgo and overwatch and i'm like well I don't like overwatch so why would I want to move from CS go towards a kind of CS go overwatch hybrid it would be like I'm a football fan and so someone came up with a game that's kind of like football but kind like golf and I don't like golf so why would I watch that when I've got football so when I play a shooter I play CS CSGO or I play Tarkov because those are games I like.

I don't want something that's like a game I like crossed with a game I don't like because that's not a hybrid I'm interested in. Well, another interesting aspect of this is that it has such high viewership, but it's artificially inflated because they're doing these drops. It's got drops enabled.

So what they're doing is for the closed beta you can get access to the closed beta via a drop on twitch right so you you have to link up your riot account to your twitch account and then you have to watch streams that have drops enabled on it and you have a chance for like a beta key to to to drop while you're watching sort of thing so it has like this this the tremendous amount of viewership like i think tarkov had the same thing recently and i know like when apex came out you remember when apex legends came out how big it was yeah and it was really big for a couple of weeks all the big streamers were pulling just these fucking godly numbers and stuff but then it turned out that there was just millions and millions of dollars behind it like oh yeah so

if you if you just it's like a catalyst if you trigger it with a couple of big paid streamers then everyone will see oh this is yeah huge on twitch i'm playing it now because i want to get in on that viewership action and it feeds itself itself. It's crazy, though. But you've got to wonder how many people are there actually watching or how many people are just AFK while they're hoping to get a drop or whatever. You know what I mean? They're just leaving the stream on but not taking part in it sort of thing. I know a lot of people that just you just log in and just and just chill you just i mean but my mate left his phone running overnight on the stream and got the drops yeah a lot of the time yeah it's interesting but i mean clearly

it works like you know there's a lot of people being like exposed this game and like people a lot of people seem to be going crazy for it but i just i just don't get it like it just doesn't look yeah that great like doesn't look like it plays but I just don't get it. It just doesn't look that great. It doesn't look like it plays well. It could be completely wrong. Maybe if I try it out, I'll like it or something. There's a lot of players playing first-person shooters. I mean, Fortnite.

Yeah, it's the biggest genre, right? CS, Call of Duty, the new thing. Also, even Minecraft. Think about being the first person combat game and even animal crossing i mean there's a lot of people playing wild yeah uh yeah i suppose yeah i didn't think of it like that oh yeah have you played the animal crossing no no i'm going to this weekend though i promised my son that we're gonna buy it because like the so the big thing was we went to the before like the lockdown and quarantine and stuff we were out we were in town and uh animal crossing

had just come out we went to the store and um they were sold out of it and my son was like oh you know i really want to get it and stuff and i was like i know but like yeah you know sometimes it's good to wait for something it's good to like look forward to something and wait for it you know like we live in this world now where you can just like buy something instantly download it you've sometimes it's good to wait for something it's good to like look forward to something and wait for it you know like we live in this world now where you can just like buy something instantly download it you've got it or whatever i think it'll be good for you to like wait for them to get like another copy and we'll come back we'll get it and then you have like you know you've got the box like a lesson uh it's like more tangible and stuff and he's like yeah yeah okay like he wasn't like too happy about it but like he understood like we're an eight-year-old to

understand it's like pretty good uh but then well of course the the lockdown came in and all the stores are closed and everything now so i so i just caved and i said okay well we'll download it like on the weekend and we'll play it and stuff so he's like shitting his pants like every time i go in the house he's like dad is it the weekend yet it's like no it's tuesday like come on he's like super excited can't't wait to play Animal Crossing. Our copy arrived yesterday. Oh, nice. My sister sent it to my eldest for her birthday present.

And you can play it four player, I think, on the same TV. But the way it works is it's not split screen. So what happens is one person is like the leader and the others can just run around and collect stuff. And they can't even, there's a bunch of stuff they can't do, but you're basically like a little helper. But the stuff you collect goes into the village recycling bin. This is all stuff I read on some wiki. Like I've never played.

You got 20 wikis open for that one? Yeah. But Mrs. F loves it. Like they were all three of the ladies in my house were playing it yesterday. Actually, the dog and the cat weren't. So of the five ladies in my house were playing it uh yesterday actually the dog and the cat weren't so of the five ladies in my house three of them were the human three um and they were uh they were playing it and they were like oh my god this is so amazing and it's the same kind of thing as i have when i see valorant i'm just like i just don't get it why are we just shaking a tree she's just shaking a tree and they're like yeah another piece of wood fell out

i was like oh my god like i know i know people who love that game yeah yeah i'm not gonna i'm not gonna flame it i'm just saying no no it's the opposite of anything i'd ever want to play i mean even with valorant like i'm i'm i'm i'm flaming it but i'm not really like it's yeah it's for me it's for me it's my personal sort of take that like it just doesn't but like i i can understand why other people would find right i'll be hyped for it but i'm just like i just feel't but like i can understand why other people would find right i'll be hyped for it but i'm just like i just feel left out because i don't feel like any sort of like hype around whatsoever no i literally just don't care so yeah no i i think you know what it is though i think from for me playing animal crossing has been a little bit like i don't know it's like

imagine okay this is a really really weird example but but I went to Italy and had like some really nice, like, I don't know, fancy pasta at like authentic restaurant. And it was like, it was like, like nothing I'd ever had. Right. And it changed the way I thought about pasta. All right. Okay. And then I came back home and I had a Sainsbury's value pasta salad.

Right. And it wasn't the same. And the person in front of me or the person at lunch was eating it next to me and they were like oh my god have you tried this pasta salad it's amazing it's got chewy and it's got tomatoes in it i've never had anything like this in my life and joey that like they don't they're like what i'm like this is i know if i was in italy two days ago in actual italy eating pasta stupid you suck i feel like with games though we've played like i don't know we know what we like but also we've played a lot of games and also it feels like

it feels like animal crossing is a kind of a Facebook game that we've played and got bored with years ago. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, to me, playing it, I understand that it's like this thing where you play for an hour a day and you slowly build up this thing and it's really cute and it's really heartwarming and it's really nice,

especially for people in the lockdown who are like want to want to create and build and stuff and it's very safe it's very friendly and it's very incredible amount of tools you can like you know customize everything um but yeah it's like it's like totally totally awkward totally slow totally frustrating to control for me you know so kind of afk gaming as well right you could totally do like two other things while you're doing it yeah um you can watch tv and have look after the kids while you're playing it as you know it's it's like this not what i want out of a game in any way shape or form and the kind of games that i've tried to get away from actively over the last you know few years uh those kind of games that hook you tried to get away from actively over the last few years,

those kind of games that hook you in and make you come back every day and don't have an end. Yeah. So they're very like skinning on you. I've tried to like this this week and this month, really. Well, the last couple of years, I've tried to play games that have an end. I played Metro Exodus this week. I really enjoyed it. Nice.

I played What Remains of Edith Finch. I'd never played that before.odus this week i really enjoyed it nice i played um what remains of edith finch i'd never played that before oh yeah i started playing that i i never got background to it but um it's only an hour and a half long i like games like that like there was like sort of mystery games did you ever play the uh the vanishing of ethan carter that was a good one as well i like that no i never played that oh that's good i played i'll pick that up then i mean i've never played gone home so i played that as well and i quite like that um so you know if i've i've in this in this sort of lockdown i've just i've been i've really enjoyed those experiences and i've read a few comics and i've read a few books and i've played animal crossing because i felt like i had to um to to be in on the hype and I think that's been the least enjoyable thing I've

done this week so that's my review of Animal Crossing nice review take it take it or leave it no that's I mean that's a that sounds like a solid nine out of ten however and I will say about Animal Crossing it's a very nice social thing to do yeah because a lot of the time you know I'm I'm on there and I'll be chatting to someone and they'll visit my island I'll visit their island and it's it's fun and it's cute and i think there's been yeah certainly i've seen some really good social experiences from it so i think if you're feeling a bit lonely animal crossing is a really great way to connect with people in this time why who have you been connecting with over animal crossing pray tell simon all right i've been playing it a

lot um he's built really some loads of really cool stuff. Yeah. He's got a really cool line, and Nina's been playing it. But I've got like 20 people on my Switch friends list. Help them do some field work. Yeah. That was the first thing I did. I saw Denver Crossing. I added everyone to my friends list, and then I've been, yeah.

So that was a nice thing. But actually, I've been playing games with people on tabletops in more. I did a Dead of Winter game. Did I tell you about that? Yeah, I think you did, yeah. Was you about that yeah i think you did yeah yeah that was yeah he told us about that didn't he period he told you about that yeah yeah he did yeah oh yeah tabletop yeah he told us oh yeah yeah yeah yeah you should you should you should yeah you should do that tabletop tabletop sim it's good i find it too finicky you know you gotta like control the hand and pick up all the pieces and stuff like that like it's very fiddly it's very you mean

like you would have to if you were playing a board game yeah but when you when you're using your own hands in real life obviously everything is doesn't seem so but imagine imagine you know it's like you're holding one of those grabby hands or whatever one of those long distance grabbers and you're trying to it's reallyby hands or whatever. One of those long distance grabbers. And you're trying to, it's really awkward. Imagine if you had to like eat your pasta with like a grabby hand. One of those litter picker. It's like even like VR, you know, when you pick things up in VR,

everything feels very like, it's cool, but it feels very labored and unnatural, right? Like it's not like, nothing beats your real hand. Eventually what they need is like a pad. I have sex with it all the time. I mean, it's perfect. That's true. I love my hands.

You need a pad that goes on the back of your hand that detects the finger movements. That's what you need. And then you need like your hand, like you just, you just slap it on there, strap it around the palm and it can detect which of your fingers is moving and where your hand is that would be ideal rather than having to hold the controller and click buttons that's the future alert alert finger detected in anus alert

cold red oh man yeah no that are you sure you want to insert that digit there, sir? Are you sure you want to insert this toy car into your anus? Are you sure your hamster will fit into your anus? That is a fucking VR game waiting to happen, isn't it? That is definitely one waiting to happen, yeah. Butt insertion simulator. Well, the big driver for all of this stuff will be porn, as it always is yeah yeah i hope so force feedback controllers and all the rest of it i mean apparently there's already i i was chatting to some mates of mine about you can you can do vr porn on porn hub and you sort of have to i think you do that thing where you strap your phone to

your eyes and you can look around and it's like you know you can look where you want right it's like i don't know how they've done it with some kind of 180 degree camera or something i guess it would have some fisheye effects i don't know but um yeah i'm not sure of the technicalities but actually they got like a google car yeah and they had like a lot of hotel room yeah a couple of people having sex all right going around and around spread them we got the google car here we only got it for an hour come on yeah there's all these hot girls like surrounding the google car and kissing it and stuff oh getting a bit steamy yeah i think it might be the heat wave though

yeah man there was a there was a definite it's hot weather haze out this morning. Yeah, yeah, it's nice out. About half nine. I went out and there was like that slight funky haze that you get when it's warm. And I guess all the dew on the grass has evaporated very quickly. And it sort of leaves this hanging slight mist. It's got a good smell to it, hasn't it? Yeah.

But my dog has a friend. Agnes has a friend called Luca. And Luca is about, well, probably three times the weight, maybe four times. She's a much bigger dog. Right. And longer. She's like some kind of spaniel or something. What are they?

Not a spaniel. What are they called? Yeah, like the big things. It doesn't look like a regular dog. A St. Bernard. No, no, no. It's like long and thin and just very hairy. Big floppy ears.

No. How is a Dachshund going to weigh four times my dog? That's the biggest. That's like the sausage car that you see people drive. The hot dog car driving around. I'm talking about a dog. Anyway, it doesn't matter. It's a bigger dog.

With floppy ears, sure. Right, and they saw each other, and they were like, it's you! And they sort of ran towards each other like long lost lovers. And they just started fighting. Like play fighting. Sniffing each other's butts. Like Aggie is like hanging off the other dogs. Like, ah, they're running in circles. They're turning each other. They loved it. They were so happy. I thought it's nice that dogs have friends. You know what I mean? Yeah. They see another dog and they're like oh it's it's that dog yeah we're best friends and they just they're playing for like 20 minutes it was very i was able to withstand the smell of this one's anus last time i like this one i like this one that's literally how it works that's how we

choose our partners too yeah well we well we we find someone whose butt smell we can withstand i guess you know if they've got really strong butt smell then it's going to be like maybe not maybe not for me but someone you know like a smoker or someone would be perfect for them you know with no they'll find out your tender profile strong smell probably best best paired with a heavy smoker i i'm a matchmaker that's all I'm saying. You know, if you're in trouble, you know,

if you've got some weird thing about you, I'll find someone for you. There'll be someone to put up with it. Someone with no sense of smell would be ideal. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. That's the way to do it. There's a bit,

there was a bit on the big short yesterday where the main guy's got a glass eye and he's a bit sort of weird. So the book is really good and um they did change quite a lot between the film and the book um yeah because i'm i'm a big fan of um michael lewis who he wrote money ball as well and a bunch of other books anyway i love all that stuff yeah it's fantastic he just finds these great stories and these great

characters but yeah the guy really did have a glass eye and there were there were things in the in the film um that they had to sort of you know dramatize but the funny thing is is because the film is very knowing because at one point they turn to the camera and they say okay this didn't really happen what happened was and they sort of explain it um i don't know why and then sometimes they do the same thing where this did really happen yeah they say this actually because some of the stuff's really interesting yeah but i'd like that but yeah he was on like a dating site whatever and he just put on there like i'm a guy you know i'm a medical doctor with 150 000 pounds of student debt who doesn't want to work in a hospital yeah and the woman was like i like your honesty yeah it Yeah, it's like, exactly, that was it.

It's like, you're the exact person I'm looking for, someone who's honest. I like that. Which is, so there you go, just shows that, you know, you can get away with anything if you're... But that honesty, if you haven't seen the film, I mean, I always see it on Netflix. It's very good. It's very tight. Like, the way they filmed it, there's no baggy parts in the film. It's just's very good it's very it's very tight like the way they filmed it there's no there's no baggy parts in the film it's just a really good story when they go down to Florida

to look at the the actual real estate crisis like I remember before it people telling me oh we've got to get in on this and my friend I had friends living in the States they were like oh yeah we're buying all these houses all you do is you buy them you rent them out and then you remortgage blah blah blah and I was like this has to be crazy like it sounds like a huge gamble it's not backed up because the one scene that they do is they he has like um the character has like a stripper telling him that she's got five houses and he's like okay there's a bubble yeah like i know people that did that kind of stuff five houses yeah jeez i mean this was honestly this is the way people were living like you could get there was

a guy um i think i think it's detailed in the book they don't really mention it and they hinted it in the film but there was um they were giving loans to mexican strawberry pickers right who were making like 17 000 a year total that's their total income for their family. And they were buying houses for like half a million dollars. And so some people- Yeah, they were called ninja loans. No income, no job. Right. So no income, no job. And they just give them a loan. So a lot of people said, oh, well, this was clearly the fault of the mortgage underwriters and the people doing these mortgages in the first place. But here's the thing. These companies that, smaller companies,

a little bit, I don't know what the equivalent of a building society is in the States, but anyway, you get the mortgage. So your mortgage broker sorts all that out. The whole point is they can then just sell that mortgage to the banks. The banks are buying them. So the idea, like there's a supply and demand there. The big bank should have said, we're not touching this mortgage with a barge pole. It's full of holes. This guy's never going to make the repayments. But they didn't. They wanted these shitty mortgages just to stuff them in these bonds because then they can sell them. That's the whole point. It fell apart because the shitty loans were being bought by supposedly rock solid financial

institutions that should have known better. So a lot of people point the finger at the middle guys and the lower end guys. But the fault has to rest with the ultimate profiteers of all this stuff which is these huge banks yeah and they didn't seem to know what the fuck they were doing like they just well a lot of the time they don't know what they're buying though as well and so for example what what housing is the classic example is like housing is very very solid you know it'll get you like not very many gains but like one percent maybe a year. Okay. And it's, it's, it's for so many years, it was a rock solid investment. Okay. And that means that what banks can do is they can take

derivatives out, which means that, you know, from one $50 million mortgage bond, they can make a billion dollars worth of investments with that one bond, see betting on it and then betting on it again and betting on it again and so that one percent a year becomes big profit but as soon as it's not making one percent well exactly somebody is um and that's that's that's that's how all the financial system is all kind of broken and weird and all split up in trillions of dollars of of debt right and collateralized debt obligated madness yeah it's crazy and it's all cryptic as well so the film does a little bit of help help to break down that deliberate like like language that wall street used to hide yeah all of the shit that they do, which is astonishing. So, I mean, we're obviously in the midst of some economic crisis now,

it feels like. Oh, there's a big one coming. I mean, they said that what could be coming is as bad as the Great Depression because it's obviously all this, the lockdown has caused a lot less international trade. So I think I was reading the other day that international trade, as a result of a lot less international trade so i think i was reading the other day that international trade as a result of the 2008 crash led to about a 10 reduction between 7 and 10 reduction in international trade because obviously you just don't need as much trade when you know you're not producing as much and people aren't buying as much and stuff like that so this might be

worse than like 20 25 reduction which would be catastrophic here we go which would be my feeling is that because we're all talking about that we're the equivalent of taxi drivers if we think there's a depression coming that probably means there isn't yeah i'm very like i've read articles about this saying how bad this could be i mean it might not be you never know we might just be able to recover but it certainly doesn't feel like this is nothing like you can't have an impact like this that just oh it's fine like for one thing if governments have to borrow huge amounts of money to cover everybody's backs while we're going through this then governments are going to owe

a shitload of money and that's not a good thing so i feel like regardless of what happens that's taking that's taking the wealth out of the future so so the way these governments are sort of printing money and selling these treasury bonds is they they're taking future tax revenues to pay for it so it's like the next 30 years worth of tax revenues are being invested into solving this crisis which feels like a bit of a gamble. But I think, yeah, it's, oh, it's such a complicated and a really interesting world. You know, I was listening to a podcast about the stock market crash of 1987, which is Black Monday. And man, there's some, some like really, because that was when they were first having these computer sort of algorithms, you know, and that they were kind of, they were very basic, but also they kind of went a bit, they were a bit sort of haywire. Um, and there weren't like sort of, you know, um, there weren't sort of any circuit breakers on the stock markets.

There were these things called like stop loss orders so basically like as soon as as soon as the stock would fall a certain amount the computers would sell and so that would cause it to fall more which would trigger more computers to sell as these on these stop loss orders and so that's why the the the the things now have oh it's anyway if you're interested in all that stuff it's fascinating it's fascinating because they hold the they hold the the planet's economy is essentially reliant hugely on these institutions in this small area like if wall street tanks and everything goes to shit everything goes to shit like not just for them it affects the whole world it's so fucking stupid but it's so centralized like that bless you gosh man you're allergic to the idea of

bankers you know it's it's weird i have no allergies normally but the past like two three days i've been sneezing and like it's like hay fever or it's like allergy season right it is yeah yeah exactly xylus has been absolutely sneezing his bar just sneezing his tits right off yeah so no like yeah it's a funny old time funny old time to to i was thinking about that as well pflex earlier actually the idea that um you know how how are all the drug dealers gonna get there how are the druggies gonna get their fix and stuff yeah well i think apparently they are though i was i was claiming that yeah but i wonder what impacts we're going to see out of this. Are people just going to switch to like...

I don't know. A lot of people have already feel like... A lot of businesses have already... Now they're able to work from home. Maybe they'll be more efficient. Nah. A lot of people saying, oh, this is going to change things.

Nah, we'll just get back to normal. That's it. We're not going to learn anything from this. That's historically been the case. Something like this happens. We learn nothing. That's it. We're not going to learn anything from this. That's historically been the case. Something like this happens, we learn nothing, we change nothing, and we're just like, oh, thank God we're back to normal. Even though with people, there are quite a few people who are a lot happier with things this way, not having to fucking drag their asses all the way into the office when they could work from home. Nah, we just need you in. Nah, come on in. We're going

to go back to normal. People will learn nothing from this that's our nature yeah do you reckon people would be healthier i feel like everyone i've spoken to has done more exercise i mean i'm interested to hear what are people are people happier like working from home um like than in the office or or well at least temporarily i think they probably anyone who has a shitty commute yeah who tells you that they're happier going into the office is a lunatic yeah a liar there's no way that people would rather spend an hour and a half each way dragging their asses into work or stuck in traffic everybody would much rather work from home i'm sure of it why wouldn't you i I think that probably,

I think if anything, this will probably highlight the fact that working from home, more people could probably do it. And it would probably cut down on a lot of like congestion, traffic, pollution, all that kind of stuff as well.

Yeah. And people will probably be happier, healthier for it and stuff. I mean, I feel like I'm even like, just for some reason eating healthier doing a bit more exercise than i was giving a bit more of a shit i think it's because it's sunny so it's suddenly sunny as well outside i just feel a lot better than i've been in the last few months you know what i think's made a big difference is that because we're not wasting

so much time every day doing stuff that we just have to do, commuting, going into work, doing stuff for the office, staying a certain amount of time, even though you basically finished what you need to do that day, all that kind of stuff. Because people get up in the morning and they lack focus, they're filling that time with other stuff. And some of that stuff is really good for you. They're just taking some time to think about yourself, trying to get into a routine yourself rather than have one forced on you. All that kind of stuff has to be more healthy for people but like i said

no it's okay you're probably right i i tend to agree with flex here i think i think it was better before don't get me wrong i'm not but i'm i feel like you know is there some light out of this or is it only is it uh you know i feel like i feel like maybe it's not just shit for you might have heard a small bird in the background there for a little bit yeah i was gonna say is that a small bird i hear in the back it is it goes but higher and it sounds good right right it's it's a great tip which i always think is a i don't know who decided to call birds but it is a great tip i only have one great tip in my tree i'm hoping i get a pair of great tips in the tree but just one at the moment but he sits in this tree every morning i've been streaming he sits there and's like, is that in the game or is that...

I found a character in Mountain Blade Banner Lords called first name Pera, P-E-R-A, last name Flatcakes. Flatcakes. Pera Flatcakes. That's amazing. What a name, eh? That is perfect. That reminded me when you were talking about tits,

I thought I should mention that. That's a good one. What a pair, eh? That is perfect. It reminded me when you were talking about tits. I thought I should mention that. That's a good one. What a pair of flat cakes on this one. Yeah. Yeah. There's some happiness anyway. I don't know. It's hard not to talk about all this stuff.

It's fucking crazy, really. Yeah. Well, because like I said, it affects everybody so much. You can't help but speak about it right like you know do you notice that like when you are out and about you and you're and you're socially avoiding people you notice that people are a lot nicer these days like people say hello to you more and stuff like that i think it's like there's because there's like all of a sudden everybody shares this common ground like we're all going through this thing at the same time so everybody's like i don't know happier to see people or just more up for like no i don't think

that's the case i think people are super super nice it's the opposite like i was walking in the park yesterday and there was like some guy doing like some ground grit like groundwork there and he sort of scowled at me a little bit and i sort of was thinking like is he judging me because like i i'm i'm i'm you know look happily walking through park am i not supposed to be in this park you know is he so i was like i didn't want to look like i was having a good time so i instantly was like oh you know better up my pace look like i'm doing my daily exercise or whatever because i don't want to him to judge me for you know breaking rules do you know i mean like i feel like there's this atmosphere of everyone it's like oh you know better not look like i'm having a good time out there because

you know gotta take it all very seriously you know stiff upper lip and all that i think it's very much that kind of war mentality out there it doesn't doesn't feel like everyone's actually having a happy good time agreed you know i mean so i don't know what it's like on jersey but maybe i don't know like i think it's it's it's not it's not bad like like i said people just seem to be more friendly you know like there's they give you sort of like a knowing um hello or or like a smile or whatever because i think everybody just realizes hang on like this sucks for everybody sort of thing yeah it's been a bit of pulling together i guess yeah it feels like it anyway i don't know maybe i saw a couple of kids um a couple of like families like two parents out with their kids and their kids were like talking through a fence

yeah i mean it felt like they were like families were not like wanted to make friends and talk to people or maybe talk to someone they knew already but they weren't allowed to like because there was a little gap between the fence like because it was like a railway line and so they were like talking across this um little area and i thought that's like a really good example of people. Talking through a railway line. Like not wanting to get, you know, because they're outside. They don't want to get sea-mined. They don't want to get in trouble. They don't want to follow the rules.

And they've got their kid running around or whatever. And they're like, don't get too close to the fence, you know. Like, I don't know. It must be tough for people with kids as well. They're pretty adept. I don't know. It must be tough for people with kids as well. They're pretty adept.

My son was playing Minecraft on his Switch whilst FaceTiming his friend who was also playing Minecraft on his Switch, but they weren't playing together. They were just playing together through FaceTime sort of thing, but not connecting to the same server or whatever. And normally he wouldn't have time to do that but because you know he's like out of school and stuff and my wife is like oh he needs like you know he misses his friends he needs to have like some time with

his friends that's the only way that he can have time with his friends kind of it's a bit weird that sounds like cute but it's weird we used to do for 10 years playing wow pretty much or half of these board games we're basically just playing our own game with minimal interaction with other people a lot of the board games i play now you're basically like solo building a fucking town or something or you know and occasionally you'll maybe look at someone else's and be like oh nice temple you got there i'm gonna destroy it uh you know and they're like oh and then like that's that's the interaction for like that's like the only interaction you have in half an hour nice um other to tell people what you're doing so they don't so you're not cheating you know kids are

pretty adaptable they are pretty adaptable yeah like uh have you ever heard of brene brown she did some ted talks i know you love ted talks list if you look up some of hers they're really good not really a fan i found them so boring well they're talking about feelings there must be good ones in there it might be like what we said with podcasts last week some of them are obviously good if they got good people but some of them are just terrible well she she did one about kids and how they're essentially hardwired for struggle and that that's true because i've noticed that kids in pretty much any situation seem to be pretty much the same. Like some of them may be, they conceal their sadness pretty well. They get on with things every day they wake up. It seems like a whole brand new adventure and

they've got this optimism in the morning and stuff. And I'm pretty sure that most people's kids, although they might be losing their minds occasionally are adapting way better than grown-ups are like they're way more yeah like i mean it's a it's a common thing for grown-ups to place like grown-up values onto children who have no concept of grown-up values right right kids are very adaptable because they know they don't know any better they have no they they haven't developed any sense of like responsibility for anything you know what i mean they're very much sort of like uh like i i wake up i exist i'm waiting for my parents to like sort things out for me and stuff yeah they like being had forced into us also they they don't have expectations or like if you think about the life of a kid, they're presented with very few options.

The situation they're in, they have very little power to change it. So I think genetically speaking, kids are pretty much, the whole point is, however rough it is, you're going to be pretty much the same regardless, you'd hope. I mean, some kids obviously go through a lot worse and are not the same, but certainly very little kids, I feel like it doesn't really matter how rough things are. They'll be optimistic and they'll be the same. They'll be kids, which is amazing. Yeah. But so they have very little agency and they just accept their situation.

They're just like, okay, well my toy is now a stick and a hoop or whatever. And you know, that's pretty pretty much that's pretty much it they don't sit there pining for for greater they're just pretty much happy with what they've got so i think it is uh it is sometimes good but look to the children look to the children yeah for inspiration well yeah i mean yes and no because it's because we're just big children yeah but i mean we but we in a lot of cases know better as well right like it's impossible to like it's impossible to like it like capture that the essence of a child because there's there's there's elements of that that are just uh impossible for for adults to because we've seen

good and we've seen bad they've only ever seen whatever yeah to them this is the situation yeah they they don't uh they haven't got the experience yet to think wow these are some rough times yeah i see they don't get it like you like when we like if my wife takes uh my kids like out for like a their daily walk or whatever she's like okay you want to be careful you can't go near anyone and they sort of understand that but they completely forget themselves all the time because they've been conditioned to you're like like my my kids i don't know if like your you're like like my my kids i don't know if like your kids are like this but my kids are naturally very sort of like reserved

around people they don't know anyway so they would never like run up to a stranger or or be anywhere near other people anyway you know what i mean they just it took years to get them to you know in in some supermarkets there's a little tokens that you can get they do this in waitrose anyway you have a little when you go to the checkout you can ask the checkout lady or fella if can i have um some of the green tokens and you put them in a charity box yeah whichever one has the most in that gets the lion's share of the charity money that we can blah blah blah so you basically vote using the tokens to vote for which charity it took my youngest until she was about seven before she mustered up the courage to say can i please have some my youngest until she was about seven before she mustered up

the courage to say can i please have some green tokens like she would just silently wait and hope the lady offered yeah and if they didn't offer she didn't get and i'd say to her i'd say if you don't ask you don't get like you're gonna ask but i'm i'm the same way now with so many things in my life like that i i won't ask someone because it's awkward. You know, I'm sure loads of people are like that as well. We are just big kids. Right. But it's not a good way to be. You've got to try and break out of being afraid of talking to people

because it's fundamental to human existence. If she's scared to ask for a green token, what else is she going to be afraid to ask for a raise, Lewis? Is she going to be afraid to phone 911 in an emergency? Yeah, the fire's just putting her in control. She's nervous about the phone call. Yeah. Huh?

Yeah, you're right. You're right. Like, you have to get over these things. I think you're right about kids being... You have to get over them, but you don't have to get over them when you're a small kid. You know what I mean? I'm trying to enforce this.

You've got plenty of time to get over that. You've got to be courageous in your interactions with other people. You've got to be. Yeah. And if you need to find a coping mechanism for that, or you're panicking inside, you've got to learn how to put on a front, do what you've got to do. Because believe me, talking in front of anything more than two or three people used to terrify me. Terrify me. But I just forced myself to do it. And I would panic inside and just try and get on with it on the outside. And after a while, you learn that you don't explode when you're nervous on the inside and you can get over it. And I think, you know, if you teach your kids nice and early on, that talking to other people

is not something to be embarrassed about or shameful. You don't need to be scared. Like I always say to people when they're worried about fucking up in front of other people, everybody's rooting for you to succeed. You know, everybody on the inside just wants a perfectly normal interaction where there's no embarrassment or cringe. wants you to do just to do well if you if you're talking to someone they don't want the conversation to be awkward they're not expecting it to be awkward they hope you have you know that you can speak normally yeah so don't worry they're not hoping you fail they're hoping the opposite i i always think that like a smile goes a long way to to actually towards people so many people you never fucking smile and in fact in some cultures it's really interesting they actually like um i was reading about this guy

who lives in i think it's like georgia with the russian sort of um on the south of russia and people there he moved there and i think met i think he met a woman there moved there and apparently that that in that culture they just are not very smiley naturally they don't they don't smile um out in public but even though they're quite happy and quite jolly and friendly and will make jokes and stuff and are friendly very friendly people but they but it's like a cultural thing where they don't they don't really smile and in america it's it's a very fakey you know waitressy kind of or server like oh you Oh, you know, smile for your tips, fakeness. Um, and that's not, not, not what I'm talking about, but certainly in the UK,

we're kind of, we're not necessarily very upbeat people naturally. Um, but I think it's a, it's very nice to have a genuine, uh, just to smile at someone, uh, when you're out you know how are you oh my god how are you doing oh fuck sorry uh anyway i was thinking about that kid thing you were saying if you let like your kids just do whatever the fuck they want they're gonna eat ice cream every day and just ruin themselves i guess i guess being a parent is a little bit like having your kid join the army and he's got this habit formed rote thing where every day it's... And people in the army are not necessarily unhappy. They do have a very rigorous, regimented life of habits and things. And it's quite... I don't think it's psychologically very good because

it's a little bit controlling but i think it is like people get used to it and they they don't hate it they're not incredibly it's not like they're in prison um where it's kind of this torture that they have to go through it certainly feels quite nice to have this this rigorous plan to your life where you're not doing things that are bad for you and we obviously have to do that as adults we have to like watch our own diet and clean our teeth and wear clean clothes and keep the house tidy and all this shit all the time and it's fucking like oh you know but and also we have to exercise we don't really want to do we have to like sleep properly and not stay up too late you know there's there's there's so many things we have to do all the time and i I don't think that you should,

you know, feel bad if you don't do all of those things. But it is positive to try and get them done. And I always feel better when I've done it. Like, it's like, I really don't want to tidy up. But once I have had it, like, clean the house, I'm like, man, I feel like this weight off my shoulders that I've done it.

I don't know. I i think we as adults we have to police our own brain and one of the things i found myself doing for example which i shouldn't do as much is i've just been really addicted to like checking the news and that's like a really bad thing to do like because of this coronavirus i've just been so morbidly fascinated with it. I'm just sort of scouring, regularly checking like different news sites for like updates and things. Like listening to the news and being involved in the news a lot more than I have ever been.

And I've noticed it this week and I've tried to cut it off because it's not a positive thing. And I'm not, it's like, I can't change it. It's all negative. It's just the same negative stuff. And it's not giving me't change it it's all negative it's just the same negative stuff and it's not giving me any like it's not making me feel better i'm not trying to hide from it the reality but it's not like a positive thing so anyway that's something which i noticed i was doing

which i shouldn't be doing yeah well be hard on yourself yeah i mean it's it's the way that it goes sometimes like with this stuff you know like you can't mean it's it's the way that it goes sometimes like with this stuff you know like you can't like there's there's definitely like an element of um like like like uh well human nature with all this isn't it like we are morbidly fascinated with things and like we we our brain is like addicted to like uh in some ways things that make you like uncomfortable or things that like, you know, might like make you feel anxious or whatever, like, like it tries to trick you all the time. And it's like, it's up to you to, to, to, to trick it into, you know, doing positive

things instead and focusing on other things that will, will actually make you happy and not just make you miserable sort of thing. I wonder what the chemical effect of being freaked out by the news is and why we keep coming back for more. Because apparently that's very successful. You know what I mean? Most of these news corporations now, it all has to be breaking news and fear, fear, fear. I think it's a control thing.

Why are we addicted to that? I think the more we read about it, the more we can distance ourselves from it and make ourselves feel better that it'll never affect us sort of thing. But people watch this stuff on the news that they think is affecting them directly. And they're terrified of it. And they adjust their behavior accordingly. I mean, you only have to look at the panic buying stuff. People took that very seriously. Yeah. So what is it about what is happening in our brains when we see news stories, and if you look at the

way the news is now compared to the way it was 30 years ago, say, it's very sensationalized, it's very scary, all these spinning graphics. I mean, the brass eye used to take it off perfectly, where it was just like, it's trying to make you scared all the time. And that's the, especially in America, the news is really, really terrifying. It feels like there's bank robbers and murderers around every corner, and everyone's going to shit, and oh my God, and then they'll have a water-skiing squirrel or something at the end. But most of the stuff is terrifying. Why are we addicted to that?

Why are we addicted to being scared by the news, and news in general, which seems like everyone wants to read negative stories and divisive stories? It must tap into something more primal. I'm very interested to find out what that is. Anyone that listens to this, if you have a source, I would love to read negative stories and it must tap into something more primary very interesting to find out what that is anyone that listens to this if you have a source i would love to read if you're smarter than us please shout us on twitter oh my poor fitbit i feel like i'm tricking this poor thing every day when i'm gesticulating wildly talking it just congratulated 250 steps so yeah 250 steps oh that's good that's good um oh my god 250 you've got to do like 10 000 a day is it going to be congratulated that's congratulating you like

just like the bat baby steps bat patting back patting thick jesus i mean i can check but if you're taking baby steps i guess you don't have to do quite so many. How many did I do? So I've done one and a half thousand today. That was walking the dog. Yesterday, I did. Oh, I wasn't wearing my Fitbit. It says I did 110 steps.

That's not true. You had a wanker. Tuesday, I only did 586 steps. Barely moved. Fuck. Monday, two and a half thousand. I did some more on Sunday. Saturday, i did it i went for a longer these are the days i went for longer dog walks when you can count your steps per day in in the hundreds that that's those are these are some lazy days i tell you what

wow yeah tuesday i did 586 steps that's that's appalling get a stat standing desk is that that thing oh i see I see what happened. Ever do? I went downstairs to make a cup of tea in the morning. And then I must have walked the dog later in the morning. I think I did some power washing maybe. And then I just sat around playing video games all day. Nice. So I did fuck all wow.

If you're yelling at stuff, does that set you get two hours of exercise a day allotted to you through this quarantine flex. Why aren't you outside running laps for two hours straight, getting all sweaty and stuff? Because I'm playing Banner Lords. I can see the exact moment, actually, that the quarantine started because it halved the number of steps or worse. Last week, I did nothing. I didn't break 4,000 once. I should do what some people have been doing and running up and down their stairs to simulate climbing

Mount Everest. People have been doing that in climbing gear. I saw a video of that. People would dress up in the climbing gear with the masks and the backpacks and go up and down their stairs as if they're scaling Mount Everest. And if you do enough, it's like, okay, we just made it to base camp day two here you know of them going up and down their stairs that's tempting yeah you should do that yeah but i or i could just play banner lord or just play banner yeah i mean it's uh the the choice is pretty clear still playing it oh man i'm in love with it i love that game i'm still playing it all right there's i have issues with the game why what keeps you what keeps you going well there's parts of it that are actually fun

like the the battles and stuff are quite fun i i just want to create a kingdom you know and then have you not done that yet yeah no i've created one i've got a couple of cities and stuff i just want to i just want to see how far i can go with it and then move on train station renovation uh the game is uh is coming out at the end of this month so that'll be that'll be the next one for me wow enjoy i mean this this is animal crossing for dads yeah pretty much don't lump me in with that shit i'm not fucking renovating a train station you get to fix up the trains and you get to clean up the stations and get it all running again stuff perfect yeah i saw you playing like a tank yeah that was great to see him or whatever you get you get like

a tip off that there's that old panzer tank buried in a field in the middle of poland and you have to go out you gotta drive out there with your equipment and you gotta power wash it and everything and bring it into the workshop and like you know fucking get all the rest of it and then invite poland with it again now it will work got to paint it all up. Finally! You've got to fix them up and paint them up for your unknown contact who's just asking

for all of these old German tanks to be refurbished. Yeah, we know who that is. Yeah, we do know. Yeah, it's Randolph Schottler, of course,

from Germany. So, yeah. I've got to eat something. I'm starving, lads. That was a podcast. Thank you, everyone. See you next week, where hopefully we won't be just in quarantine talking about this virus.

They're saying 1st of May is the new potentially lifting the lockdown sort of thing. We can't go till July. We've got to break out of this shit. It's getting crazy. and um think it about thinking one day we'll look back on this time and we'll we'll we'll reminisce about it and we'll say god do you remember the coronavirus

that was crazy man and everything will be back to normal yes i look forward to capitalist slaves once more exactly thank god exactly Thank you. See you later. Peace. Goodbye.