Triforce! - Triforce! #200: The Big Two-Zero-Zero

Episode Date: December 22, 2021

Triforce! Episode 200! Live from Jingle Jam we celebrate 200(ish) episodes of Triforce! Pyrion spots a celebrity while wandering Bristol, Lewis is an Adult Fan of Lego (AFOL) and we grill Sips over his Dota Buff profile! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hello, everyone. Welcome to Triforce episode 200 live from the Jingle Jam 2021. I've joined in the studio. I didn't start my audacity. Can we do a mark? We can do a mark. 3, 2, 1. Mark!

Welcome, PFlex. Now it's a Triforce. Am I right? You can't turn it on until that you've done a mark i didn't feel that so lewis said to you this morning what do you have prepared for episode 200 i had to white break with tradition and actually like prepare and make an effort this is my normal pose when watching trifle doing trifles i just live out my eyes closed i just mumble so i thought you know that's worked for 199 episodes it's

gonna work now yeah is this episode 200 nah it's but if you add them up it's probably like 215 or something but who gives a no but are we saying this is yeah this is it what did we do for the big 100 it was uh yog con right what was your con yeah live that's right there's a great meme from that yog con where there's a great two of us were listening to you read bodega although that was not triforce that was it was that was just a separate thing that slow pan was incredible right it was whoever was on how fucking angry you guys looked no we were like this is like man we were tired remember how hot it was it was boiling it was insufferably hot i know what i saw so this is this is how trifles works you know we

say mark and then we all get a boner and then we all just sort of carry on from there that's usually how it works usually lewis has music there's no music on Triforce what's happening I think TJ's got the extended intro so it's TJ could we turn the music off please this is a place of silence and reverence and reflection as well TJ

he's gone oh thank you he's left he's doing it he's doing it we shouldn't need any help we're fine as we are oh it's so much better we can manage do you do you do you need the bird singing and um a dog niffing at your oh yeah flax can't podcast without bird song in the background and a russian spy nearby no last few weeks it's just been drilling and hammering noises because of my blooming neighbor's love conversion so no just nice bit of science i'm not hangover today in fact i'm i was stone cold sober yesterday tried playing poker with dav mike xylos rabs and me it was the most miserable

experience of my life i stormed out at about 9 30 and went back to the hotel. Oh my God. 9.30? Did you lose all your money? I did. Oh dear. Went wrong. Well, that's what you get when you play with the Yogscast poker champion himself. He's going to slap you down. I heard Daff won the whole thing.

Made a fool out of all of you. He beat the wheel. He beat the wheel. He beat the wheel. And he managed to beat the wheel. He beat the wheel. So, Lewis played as Wheel Boy and he had a wheel and he spun it. Is this like a tie-in to his Wheel of Time sponsorship deal thing that he's been doing? If it was, it's over. He's rebranded himself as Wheel Boy, Wheel of time boy he's like he's like the red

red t-shirt guy from blizzcon no he's just uh it was a thing he does with tom when they do tabs apparently um so yeah it was that so he spanned the wheel and it would say things like all in or fold or raise or tip the dealer and stuff and he managed to finish second overall by allowing a wheel to decide what happened it was it was pretty good that shows the quality of the yorkscar's poker really doesn't it um it was great but yeah holy crap we got a donation of course we're doing this as part of the jingle jam um jinglejam.tiltify.com by the time this podcast actually goes out though oh no we do it live we're doing it live sorry no Casu thank you he says hello Lewis

Simpson Perrion I'm very happy to announce that I have a tiny penis have a very crimbus nice nice throughout the year people will announce to me on the street that they have a tiny penis or very occasionally a gaping vagina

which is always weird that's a rare one i don't get that you look around when they say i haven't had any any gapers mostly it's just dudes coming up to me and just kind of um you know in in a coy manner saying i have a tiny penis by the way yeah um and and sometimes within earshot of other passersby, which is even funnier. I think we picked the best code phrase for the podcast. I don't think so. It's been a comedy goldmine at times. For you.

For me, it's just been an awkward fest. It's been horrific. It never worked for me. It's been horrific. I don't know. I've had men tell me they have a gaping vagina and women tell me they have a tiny penis so i think it's just it doesn't matter you pick and choose you can choose whatever thing you want to say these days you can be whatever you want to be too like everyone's slightly different yeah you gotta we could have just chosen something like um i have a real

lust for life yeah but we didn't I got a lust for life that sounds like something you you want to believe I got a real lust for life I was uh when I walk home from here I have to go across the square the square of doom what uh oh I guess you can't really say what hotel you're staying in give me okay describe

the general area what proximity is it to the office? It's reasonably close to the office. Do you have to cross a bridge at any point? People would be able to figure out which hotel it is if I literally walked you through it visually. Well, Sips always stays in the Marriott. He does.

Okay, come on. You don't have to tell people that. He likes it. There is a fountain. It's kind of queenly class. He wouldn't know the water sips, but he secretly wishes he was an English gent. I have high standards. Really high standards.

It was full of soap bubbles this morning. Hilariously. People had put washing up liquid in the fountain thing and it would bubble everywhere. Very standard stuff. But there was an awful lot of drunk people out last night. I don't know why. Was it a special occasion um saturday yeah i stayed at a um i stayed at a different hotel when i was over for yog con which was like one of the last times i was over before

covid kicked off and stuff and uh it was it was very warm uh the whole time yog con was on and i was there with my family so my wife and my at the time two kids were were with me and uh that same fountain the one with the steps that was filled with bubbles i think that's just how they clean it but there was a whole gathering of drunk people um there all night into the into the early early hours of the morning singing oasis songs all night long it was the worst lately if you ever feel the rain of the morning like all night long fuck me it was the worst other people having a good time fucking but i don't think people listen to a to oasis

otherwise i think you get you get just like shit-faced drunk and then you sing Oasis, right? It's the only time that it's reasonable to listen to Oasis. I don't think you could just be in your car and just put Oasis on, right? If you do, don't let us know at home.

Yeah, just do not. It's great sing-along music though to do the Oasis drawl. When you're drunk, it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd say any other time not. You gotta take your time. You gotta say what you say. That fountain's very close to the spot where they dumped,

what's-his-face into the drink? The statue of the dude. Colson? Yeah, the slave guy. Oh, by the way, celeb spot this morning on the way into the office. I spotted a celeb. It was Judge Rinder. Who the fuck is Judge Rinder?

There's a lot of BBC stuff in Bristol. You tend to see people out and about. You saw Judge Robert Rinder. He's a TV personality. He was filming something. Is he like the shit Judge Judy?

The British Judge Judy? That is exactly right. And I believe he's an contestant on Strictly Come Dancing. Chat to confirm. IMDB gives it a 5 out of 10. Judge Rinder? Who the fuck is Judge Rinder who doesn't know i'm looking him up right judge rinder judge rinder is robert rinder he's doing panto he's this guy he's the he's the um yes i know who this is i know who judge rinder is what's his background though he was like uh was he like a celebrity lawyer or something like that at some point?

He's probably an actual barrister of some description, right? Yeah, he's been in all sorts of like reality shows and stuff. God, he's desperate for it, isn't he? You can tell. Look at his face. He is like one of these people who will do any shitty reality TV show that comes along. Do you know what I mean? There's a lot of money in that.

He was on Strictly Come Dancing. He's got an MBE, though. Good for him. Does he actually? Do you have one, Lewis? Yeah, but what did he get an MBE for? For being better than Lewis, I guess. Then we should all get him.

I think you just hang around the BBC for a bit and you'll get one. Or you pay for them. You can buy them, can't you? He was called to the bar in 2001 after graduating the University of Manchester, starting his pupillage at two paper buildings. He then became a tenant at Two Hair Court. He went on to specialize in cases involving international fraud, money laundering, and other forms of financial crime.

He was involved in the prosecutions following the murders of Letitia Shakespeare and Charlene Ellis in January 2003. I remember that. And the defense of British servicemen on charges of manslaughter after the deaths of detainees in Iraq. He defended?

He, yeah, he defended British servicemen on charges of manslaughter after the death of detainees in iraq yeah that we should probably leave that one off the cb well since 2010 he's been involved in the investigation and prosecution of alleged bribery corruption and fraud in the british overseas territory of the turks and caicos islands i don't know what the turks and caicos islands uh is uh they're fancy they're like they were tax haven yeah i think probably like some of them right tax havens that's where james bond like hides out jeremy in one of these english overseas territories with like five people

there where are you calling us from sips where i'm uh i'm reading this on Wikipedia right now. From a tech fan? Oh, sorry. Where am I calling into the podcast from? Yeah. Leeds. While practicing as a barrister, Rinder wrote television scripts in his spare time. Upon attempting to sell one, he met producer Tom McClellan. He approached ITV with a proposal for a remake of the 1970s program Crown Court, but this was rejected in favor of a British version of Judge Judy, typical ITV. And McLennan offered Rinder the opportunity to front it. Since 2014, he's been the judge in the reality courtroom series Judge Rinder,

where he's been referred to as British Judge Judy. So there you go. It's like Judge Judy, but he caps it up quite a lot. You know what I mean? He does that. So it's quite sort of a campy version of Judge Judy. She's just belligerent. She's quite Anne Robinson, isn't she?

She's like a belligerent landlady. I don't know how he got, oh, Rinder was appointed member of the Order of the British Empire in the 2021 birthday honors for services to Holocaust education and awareness. Right. I wasn't aware of that no me neither so so he was i mean i actually sort of got grudging respect for him as a defense lawyer rather than a prosecutor because prosecutors are these supposed to be these heroes these like kind

of it's like it's like the go get it's like the jocks of the lawyer world all right okay okay cut the stream that's it i knew this that's why we can't do this live well this is too he's out of control this guy good tj get his badge and his gun he's off the case whereas let's cut the defense lawyers are like these like they're they're they have to be a different sort of way of thinking you know to do that yeah i know because you're often like gonna have to defend people you really don't want to defend i think if you're a public defense lawyer but you i mean the point is like who do you think all the the drug barons have lawyers that defend them for huge amounts of money right yeah yeah so it's not like saying i think that's quite noble defending mass murderers like well you've got to do your job

but i don't think it's more noble than trying to put those people behind bars easier isn't it to be the superhero guy arresting people getting them are you you've done a bad thing it's not as it's more noble than trying to put those people behind bars easier isn't it to be the superhero guy arresting people getting them are you you've done a bad thing it's not as it's not as easy to be like oh well he was only he only stabbed him three times your honor but they're the ones who get bumped off by the mob the prosecutors it doesn't fit you must acquit i think if you're going to be a defense lawyer you've got to come up with some catch phrases it's basically a catchphrase it's all the game is just catchphrases that's it yeah i think roy walker would have been fantastic as a as a defense attorney what the guy from fucking catchphrase just see what's it what's mr chips doing there just say what you see is it bun in the oven it's good but it's not right

let's have another one so yeah i just, I just noticed someone in chat, the Omnitrix Tugs, says, I met Lewis for the first time in August at a Lego show. So there was a little Lego. Everyone had brought their Lego to the ground floor galleries and had a load of tables out and were showing off all the Lego they built. Did you bring Lego? No, I didn't. Did you dress up as Wheelboy for that one?

I didn't. To fit in with all of the other children that would have been there wouldn't this have been something for dare i said children well yes but there's a lot of what's called a falls isn't there adult fans of lego can they not just say i like lego why do they have to have a a fall what is that well they have to have like a technical like title for it to make it sound official that's an anagram they should call themselves loafs right what's oh what lego of of adult fans lego of adult fabrication i, yeah. No, that works, yeah.

And... AFOL gang. There's a... People in my chat have just all gone crazy. I think there's a lot of AFOLs in here. Yeah. No, so, I mean, it was... Also known as a man-child.

See, maybe... We all are, kind of. But the thing is... Good one, Chad. So, why did you go to this? I didn't go to it. It was there when I was there. I was passing through. He lives in the lobby.

I went to a bench-pressing competition and a beer drinking to see who could drink the most beer competition. There were some nerds in the lobby doing their Lego. So I puffed in and was like what the fuck dude this is for kids can you make that into a barbell or something useful no tiffany so look at these nerds oh man so no they had um they had like basically they had like these um

kind of uh donut shaped tables set up and so they could um they had like basically they had like these um kind of uh donut shaped tables set up and so they could have they could stand in the middle of the tables and people could walk around and there was sometimes they had like a railway going around the whole thing gosh or one of them had like um one of those ball machines that like moves balls if anything is called a ball machine i just immediately laugh i love that like when people talk about a ball pit ball pit i mean it does seem like one of those sort of it does seem like a basically just a breeding pit for disease well it's just it sounds like your armpit but for your nuts like a ball pit oh i also wonder is that your gooch i I don't know, I don't tuck them under Is that the ball pit?

I want to know What ball machine would you trust Actually with your balls If someone described it as a ball machine What is your version of what Would be an acceptable piece of machinery To put your nuts in Okay, for me it would be data

From Star Trek The Next Generation, but with George Costanza's soft hands when he did the hand modeling. Captain, I call my mouth the ball machine. Captain. Feel free to place them in here.

Captain, I have been reprogrammed as the ball machine. Good job, Data. Engage, ball machine. Captain, I believe we should raise shields. Shut up, Data. Engage, ball machine. Captain, I believe we should raise shields. Shut up, Wolf. The ball machine and I are having words.

Oh, fuck you, man. You know what? I like Lego as much as the next guy. I do like Lego, but not enough to label myself as a Lego lover or give myself an acronym or whatever. You know what I mean? Like, that's too far for me. Like, I just think I like Lego, whatever. You know, should they be less? I mean, is it one of these terms that is basically just because they're ashamed, you know, and it's just better just to be open with it.

I think there's strength in numbers. And the moment you have a group calling themselves AFOL or LOAF or whatever they're called, then you empower yourself and you're saying, no, no, no. We're part of AFOL and we're together. Stand with me, brothers. It's like a banner. Yeah. You didn't need to come up with an acronym or even name yourselves.

It does sound like they're armed, though, doesn't it? Armed, yeah. I wonder if they're on the list of potential terrorist organizations. I made myself a Lego AK-47. I'm going to keep an eye on AFOL. This is my Lego Desert Eagle. Oh, man. Alright, Mr. President, here's this morning's

briefing. We got Al-Qaeda, of course, and the IRA are still knocking about. A couple of other white supremacist groups. And then we got this new one, AFOL. They seem to have come out of nowhere. Apparently they got a lot of tanks. They got a Death Star. Gas station. Airport.

A couple of hotels. A house from the Simpsons. The Echo One. They got a lot of Harry Potter stuff. They got a beautiful Eiffel Tower. They got Harry Potter, for God's sake, Mr. President. He's working with them. The whole Star Wars ensemble, forget about it. Spider-Man.

Spider-Man. Forget about it. Thor. They got Thor. Forget about it, Mr. President. They got Thor. They got Thor. Several Pat reveals. Oh, man. Have you guys been up to anything interesting at all this week

other than just drinking a lot and doing Jingle Jam? I guess, Flax, you've been down since, what, Thursday? What day is it today? Sunday? Yeah, I came down Thursday, went to the pub. And then Friday. What did we do on Friday? Was Friday the poker?

Friday was the poker. Did I do something else? It was Friday. We played the poker? Friday was the poker. Did I do something else? We played yesterday. No, that was yesterday. Oh, have you played with your model soldiers yet? No, that's Monday. Oh, okay. But I brought them down.

And Lewis gave me a special box. I sound like your mom. Did you pack your model soldiers? Well, my wife teases me about them. You played with them, yeah? She always says, are you painting your little men? I'm like, yes. And this is annoying because I'm in the kitchen

and she's working from home in the kitchen. So she's flaming me in the same room just every now and then. She looks up, still painting your little men. I'm like, yes. Well, when Piri got here, I was like, have you brought your toys? And he went, they're not toys not you as well yeah i have i have painted my little men ben said for a noob he said that's not bad period you've done better than i thought you were going to do for a noob i was pleased yeah you've done the praise of ben means a lot to me lewis also had

something he is he is very um he knows a lot about this stuff he knows a lot means a lot to me. Lewis also had something to say about it. He is very... He knows a lot about this stuff, right? He knows a lot about a lot of things. Board games, model painting and stuff. There's a high standard. If he gives you praise, it means something. Adult fans of Little Soldiers. Yes, Toy Soldiers are okay.

Lego is not. Toy Soldiers is a historical recreation for those of us who did test it in the past. Lego is nothing The toy soldiers It's a historical Recreation for those Of us who did Testy in the past Lego is nothing Quite frankly Does it have dice Is it a simulation

Recreation Military Strategization No What if they did Like a World War 2 Lego set Then I should

Purchase it And I should Enjoy it very much You know what The weird one is Minecraft Lego It's gotta be The worst Lego What is the point It's so boring Like they're Just It just you know the you know the weird one is minecraft lego it's it's got to be the worst lego what is

the point it's so boring like they're just it just you know what i mean like it's kind of like you look at minecraft as well isn't it because it's so it's more it's more tedious yeah it's like yeah yeah that is a weird one you're right yeah the sets are are not great there's some real stinkers like i think it's the the undersea temple one just sucks like if you got that as a christmas present you would just think off the undersea minecraft temple you better not open your christmas present for me it's because is that what you got me no i didn't get i was doing a reverse psychology i was saying i didn't like yeah very clever yeah well lego's always a safe present though, isn't it?

It is, yeah. Don't give me Lego. Unless it's World War 2 official Lego. And I don't have it already. Someone in chat says Playmobil is better than Lego. Get them out of here! They're not even a sub.

Do you know, some Playmobil is actually not bad. Like my son got a whole bunch of Ghostbusters Playmobil is better than Lego. Get them out of here. They're not even a sub. Do you know, some Playmobil is actually not bad. Like my son got a whole bunch of Ghostbusters Playmobil. The attention to detail is unbelievable, honestly. Someone says there's a Seinfeld Lego. That can't be right. There is Seinfeld Lego. Are you serious? Yeah, it's hilarious.

Yeah, it's actual. For reals? You got all the whole cast is in there. With onesies. It's like his apartment, but it's a set. It has all the cameras and stuff too. Oh my God. It's awesome.

I need it. They look exactly like the characters as well. I think this is how they make all their money now, Lego, right? People like me going, this is iPhone they make all their money now lego right from people like me going yeah it's all these like uh it's all these collector's edition like ip crossover things you know one of my favorite logos in the world is i don't know if i can make this bigger see if i can hold it up the sad kid that's not allowed to use something. The sad onion. Because he's under three. This logo begs a lot of questions.

First of all, he has hair like that. Second of all, he's aware enough that he's too young to play with the Seinfeld Lego set, which means he is aware of Seinfeld at the age of three. Yes. It doesn't make much sense. Well, this is the generation, right? Seinfeld at the age of three. Yes. I mean, it doesn't make much sense. It's, it's all, this is the generation,

right? This is the Netflix generation. Who is this aimed at? The Seinfeld Lego set. That is aimed at me. They know what's up. The, the,

the Kramer model needs to be bigger because he's incredibly tall. So I want to see his body and legs need to be longer. I don't know if that's going to be break the Lego. Yeah. You can't do that. Galactic rules, but. Well, can you, can you do that check you make longer lego men you could just put a couple of bricks you've got a daisy chain all of the legs onto each other you know because like the tops of the legs have the the little spigots yeah they've got the spigots that you could and

then the bottoms of the of the legs have the receiver bays for the two brick tall legs apparently according to someone so maybe you can get those place your spigot in my receiver yeah i think there's like special like like again coming back to the minecraft set i think you can get enderman and they have very long legs oh well there you go but are they are they those fixed model things that are very popular with Lego now? And apparently the Lord of the Ring hobbits and dwarves have shorter Lego legs. So it's like if you get a special set, you could potentially have. Yeah.

Oh, I'm actually. Because I don't think that there's a willow. Was it willow? Sure. The one that. George Lucas's? Warwick Davis. Fantasy movie? With Warwick Davis Fantasy movie with Warwick Davis?

Yeah, Warwick Davis was in it. I don't think that there's a special Willow set, but it looks a lot like Lord of the Rings, right? So you could maybe grab a Lord of the Rings Hobbit. Have you seen Willow? I saw it when it came out. All right. I've seen the film many times.

We're going to do a live Willow quiz. Okay. I've only seen it one time, and it's when it came out, and I was taken to see it on my birthday. I think I was seven or eight years old. Oh. Let's find out exactly how old you were. When did the movie come out?

1988. Right. It was for my eighth birthday then. I would have gone to see Willow in the theaters. Okay. Well, that's the only time I've seen the quiz. What is the name of the main bad guy in the movie? What is her name?

Willow. It's Queen Bath Mordor. Of course. What character does Val Kilmer play in the film Willow? Willow. Mad Martigan. Of course. Of course we do.

Good guess though. Where does Willow first meet Mad Martigan? Of course. Of course we do. Good guess, though. Where does Willow first meet Mad Martigan? Willowville. At the crossroads in a crow cage. Of course, yeah. What derogatory nickname do the humans have for the little people played by Warwick Davis? Cunts. Little cunts.

They call them pets. Oh, close. And what is the name of Queen Bavmorda's daughter who Val Kilmer seduces? Sorry, I thought you said who's Val Kilmer's juices, but I didn't. That is what he said.

Seduces. Val Kilmer juices somebody's daughter? Sid juices. Willow? Oh. It's Saucer. Saucer. Of course it is. Saucy Saucer.

What special magical piece of vegetation does the wizard of Willow's village give to him in order to defend him when he's out in the wild? He gives him some magic what? It's that fucking labamba bread from Lord of the Rings. You're thinking of Lembas bread? Sorry? He gives him acorns. And what do those acorns do when thrown at an enemy? Kill them?

They turn them to stone! Oh, close. Anyway, carry on. Man, that was so close. How are we doing with this quiz now? How many have we got right? We've got zero. I think I'd get the Lord of the Rings Lego.

I do, actually. You know what we should do? Let's do a Lord of the Rings quiz, because we've all seen that. Oh, I'm down for that. Lord of the Rings. I'll find one for you. No, no, I'm doing it.

I want to be the quiz master. Okay, no, no. I'm finding you the. Lord of the Rings. I'll find one for you. No, no. I'm doing it. I want to be the quiz master. Okay. No, no. I'm finding you the quiz. Quiz. Saoirse. Okay. Toughest ever quiz.

Lord of the Rings. Okay? Yeah. All right. Do we buzz in or what? Yeah. Okay. The Lord of the Rings.

Toughest ever quiz. Do you know your golem from your Gandalf? Yes. Okay. What book? book okay question number one what book did tolkien want published simultaneously with the lord of the rings uh there's three um possible answers okay was it the samarillion that's one of them okay okay second one is the adventures of tom bombadil oh and the third one is the hobbit Second one is The Adventures of Tom Bombadil Oh And the third one is

The Hobbit Which one is it? It's not The Hobbit Surely because he wrote that one Before Lord of the Rings It could be The Adventures of Tom Bombadil You know Because he

We meet Tom Bombadil In The Fellowship of the Rings He was in The Hobbit as well though Wasn't he Tom Bombadil? Did they meet Tom Bombadil In The Hobbit? I don't, wasn't he? Tom Bombadil? Did they meet Tom Bombadil in The Hobbit? I don't think so. I don't think they did.

Or is it just at the start of the movie? I'm going to say it's The Silmarillion. It's got to be The Adventures of Tom Bombadil. All right. Okay, well, so if I vote, I get to overrule one of you, right? Well, only if you're honest. Lewis wants it. Okay, I'm'm gonna go with

the silmarillion as well okay it was correct yeah there you go okay one out of 15 is it like some sort of some sort of background history that you wanted then that's weird okay you wanted it next question time that's crazy what does frodo wish for at the black gate of Mordor. A thousand Oliphants with Gandalf on a white one at their head that the ring had never, never been found or no killing.

It's got to be that the ring was never found, surely. Yeah, I feel like it's the second one too. The ring had never, never been found no killing no okay i need to take a risk to catch up well the thing is though is that we've both decided on one and then you've just gone with another one and we overrule you so i didn't realize you were gonna do this quiz like i didn't realize you were gonna be in the quiz well i didn't i

didn't make the quiz i it quiz Right but you've also just Googled and landed on the first one I think what I Our expectation was that you would have the answers We would buzz in And you would quiz us How do I do that though? Just like go on Wikipedia and ask you questions

Like based on what I've just read I can't do that You're doing fine Okay that the ring had never, never been found? We don't have to do the whole thing. Let's go with that. That sounds reasonable. It was wrong.

It was actually, we were all wrong. The correct answer was a thousand oliphants with Gandalf on a white one at their head. Is that what he wished for? That's exactly what he wished for, yeah. I haven't read the book since ages and ages. A thousand oliphants? Who the hell does he think Gandalf is?

Not even he can rumble that up. This is a hard quiz because it's like, these are questions that were not in the movies. Well, it's the toughest ever quiz. It's labeled the toughest ever quiz. I can't really remember what was in the movies. It's the least fun ever quiz. My memory's not that.

I'm not the fucking... Okay, try this one then. What's his name? Try this one on for size. What's his name? How does Lobelia Sackville Baggins attempt to smuggle several small but rather valuable items out of Bag End? Ass. In the brim of her hat.

Inside her umbrella. In her ball pit. In her pocketses. In her ball machine. And this, in her pussy. That doesn't exist in the quiz, but let's just put it in there. I'm going to say in the brim of her hat, that'll do. It's very competency, isn't it? The brim of her hat, that'll do. It's very competency, isn't it?

The brim of her hat. It's wrong. It was inside her umbrella. Oh, of course. I don't even want to do any more of these. I'm done with this quiz. That was so hard. That feels like it was more a quiz about the books. This is on BBC Arts.

The Lord of the Rings toughest ever quiz. If you feel like doing this yourself. I reckon Duncan would have got all of those. He's the Lord of the Rings toughest ever quiz, if you feel like doing this yourself. I reckon Duncan would have got all of those. He's the kind of guy. Who reads books? One of those. Yeah, I agree with Black's, though. Toughest ever quiz, but the least fun as well.

I think you've got to find a good balance. You have to find a balance where it's not so insufferable that you just don't want to finish it, but also tough at the same time. I'm not ashamed of a good quiz. I'm not ashamed of being an adult fan of Lord of the Rings. I'm fine with that. It's a great series of books. Great series of movies.

What label would you give yourself as an adult fan of Lord of the Rings? A-F-O-L-O-T-R? Affolter. Affolter? A falotter A falotter A phalotter A phalotter A phalotter

A ring A ringer A hobbit head A hobbit head It's going to be more A hairy foot A ring ray Something they would know

Something cool you'd know you'd be like i got hairy feet so yeah me too i think you'd just change your last name to sound like a hobbit clan like the proud feet right or sackville baggins sackville sackville ball machine baggins i've been n naked. Triple barrel. Yeah. We've got some donations though. Benedict donated. He says still

hoping for a PFLAX postman pat dub from episode 92. And I have a tiny penis. Do you remember that at all?

PFLAX postman pat dub. No. No memory of that. You were keen for that. Harry O has

said this time of year I've got a baby carrot for a tiny cock there you go that is you what a message has donated a thousand pounds to charity and said thank you for the podcast i only spent 21 000 minutes listening to them this year well if you're a baker what else have you got to listen to the sound of bread rising you know come on stick a podcast on why not ours yeah it's good um Listening to them this year. Well, if you're a baker, what else have you got to listen to? The Sound of Bread Rising. You know, come on, stick a podcast on Why Not Ours.

Yeah, it's good. Man, it's going really well, this. I'm enjoying it. But the podcast. Yeah. In general. It's going better than I expected it would. What do you think it was going to be like?

We've done 200 of these and they've all been gold. It's true. Yeah. Name a bad episode. Yeah, try to just, that's true. Yeah. Name a bad episode. Yeah, try to just that's a good challenge. We should ask to try, we should ask like, what about like

quiz questions about this podcast? We probably won't be able to try for... Architects you guys are always recommending the book Bread Rising. Very good. That's a Baker reference and an OG trifle show. Oh, my God.

Yeah, mixed in. Yeah, that's crazy. You ask us questions, chat. Yeah. You ask us quiz questions about your trifles knowledge. Anytime I was abroad. Yeah, those are always tough to do. You know, we're miles away and all that.

Figuratively, literally, historically, accurately, scientifically. Hey, I had uh booster jab on friday how'd you feel so i'm not my well just uh just the same honestly like a little bit tired actually but i don't know if that's from getting a jab or just from having like a million kids to look after you know it's hard to tell so playing the dota yeah he is they were stressing last night about it because joe said he was going to go mid against dav and dav was like oh i'm not up for that he's gonna he's gonna destroy me and i was like you'll be fine but he was really determined that this should not happen why is he put that in his head that's not gonna happen we're not gonna make like the best player in the yorkscar's play the worst the Yogscast. I can see a couple of people online now getting ready.

Alex, Bree, Bryony, Monkfish, Rav, Zylus. They're all in the game right now. Well, they were really, really determined that this was going to be a very serious, very important game of Dota. And I was like, lads, can you calm down? It's just a stupid in-house for a laugh so we can laugh at you.

And they were like, yeah, but... I might play... Do you know what i've never played invoker before today might be the day okay exactly today i might just be invoker mid wow let's go exactly no yeah you should all play evoker five v five invokers all the way invoker invoker only yeah yeah i would actually watch watch that. Just do that stupid electricity thing that eats all your mana on each other constantly and then nobody can cast any spells. Do you want some invoker tips?

Oh, God. All right, so... Well, save him for the... This could be a new segment. This should be a new long-running segment on the podcast, invoker tips. He's a complicated hero. It could go on for years. It's like the dad on the sidelines of their it's like he's a complicated hero he could go on for years it's

like the dad on the sidelines of their kids soccer game or whatever i'm just gonna give him three things to remember just three okay the three three top tips all right for playing invoker okay let's go i use i use acronyms in my head to remember what of your q w and e you need to cast each spell so if you want to do the tornado it's w w q which is windy windy quick right which makes a really big quick tornado so you have to you have to like uh combine spells together to form a spell yeah so you have your shit man so every time every spell that they do they have to do so what so these guys have robo fingers then right there's no way i'd be able to pump out there they got to be scripting no it's just practice you save two of them you can have two

spells active so you can save you save two of them you might do type in the codes to save but if you want to play if you want to play with more than those two spells like in combat you then have to type in the code so you for instance you go wwq and press r to invoke that spell that's now ready on your d and f keys you press d and you cast that one and then if you did eee which is all the exhort that's the the sunstrike so you press r and that's ready the invis spell they have and the sun's right so you press r and that's ready the invis spell they have and the sun's right so you can have two you can have two spells ready to go yeah after you sunstrike is what eee what is and what's escape what's the invis that is qqw quick quick one what's the ice wall that is uh qeq so normally what you get is you get the invoker doing the meatball.

Which is E-E-W. So it's the wind. They wind you up and then they meatball you. And then while that's happening. What's the one where they right click you and stun you every time they hit you? That is cold snap. That is Q-Q-Q. So it's a whole.

Fuck that stupid shit. It's a whole thing. Every time. It's really good. But yes, that is a nightmare. I've tried it and I can't understand how some people only play that as well. Have you guys ever looked at DotaBuff and looked at the highest win rate thing? Yeah, yeah.

Some of these guys have insanely high win rates. I was looking at a guy who has 56 games of Murana played with 100% win rate. That's insane. He's probably smurfing. I guess so. The rank one player with the highest win rate in the game right now, over 1,908 matches played, has a win rate of 98.22 right so 1908 games total yes so that's a smurf as well so he's only lost it on this account he's only lost 34 games yeah he's legend five so a lot of the pro players have a smurf account they used to warm up on

and to like goof around on, and they don't want it on their main account. Almost certainly. Almost certainly. Look at this. So this is one of them, right? So I'm looking at Sips' Dota buff activity.

Okay. Look at the gaps. Look at the gaps, but look at the consistency of these gaps. So basically Sips plays Dota for what looks looks like about 10 weeks yeah and then stops and doesn't pick it up again for a year yeah yeah yeah for 10 weeks you don't play for i'm a seasonal gamer you don't play for a year and you've done this one two three four five six seven times in the past and you've played dota sips this year for 10 weeks. Yeah. So you are due.

I know. So it's coming up to, yeah. Coming up to my big rage out. Yeah. You're such a seasonal gamer. So prior to this, you hadn't played for two and a half years. Nearly three full years. Yeah.

Three full years of games. The last time I played. And you know what? The pattern continues too. Because the last time I played, I played a ton of Bounty Hunter. I had like a 14 game win streak with Bounty Hunter. And then I played a game with Cock Wobblemeister and he triggered me so hard I uninstalled the game. Poor Riley. Riley is a goon from my Discord and an absolutely lovely lad.

But yes, I do remember him saying, he's told us, that's like his claim to fame essentially. Yeah, but listen yeah if you google him that comes up that that story comes up also though recently i've been playing in games with him and some of your other guys and we've discovered that if i play bounty hunter 4 and he plays uh tide 3 we win every game we have 100 win rate you went to you went zero 15 on that yeah we were watching you went zero 15 yeah that means you died 15 times you didn't get any kills yeah not so you just you just unlocked the secret to how to win at those every game yeah you go zero 15 on bounty hunter oh yeah The tight position three somehow wins. Okay, look at my,

look at some of my previous matches here and look at this, look at the last game I played as Legion Commander. It was a real stinker. And look at the

Invoker in this game. Look how many Bounty Hunter games you've played. My God. I know, you've only been playing Bounty Hunter. Oh, that makes me

want to puke. Legion Commander, there we go. Lost match. You've played been playing Bounty Hunter. Oh, that makes me want to puke. Legion Commander. There we go. Lost match. You went 3-17? Look at the Invoker in this game, though. He was insane. He was 21-4 and 28.

Oh, he was a monster. You died 17 times, dude. Man. Yeah, I know. But look at the fucking Invoker in this game. And look at the rest of their team. Like, he would turn up. He was un unkillable he would kill a lot of us and then the rest of the team would just clean up like it was just the lion in your game was 3 and 24 mouse over that name i want to see who that was it's one of your guys hunter yeah this is the issue you're playing

with with baddies but you're also playing with an ancient Legend 4. Who's the ancient player? The ancient was, I think... Oh, it's Ashwin, is it? Oh, no, that's Matthew. Okay, that's a problem. Well, I mean, you're playing with... Eddie Smalls.

You're queuing in with, like, this invoker who killed you was a decent player. He's played, like, 10,000 games of Dota. He's not a noob. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. 41k net worth at the end of it. And their Venomancer, 46k net worth.

He died 79 times. That's a lot of deaths. I mean, it's quite a lot of deaths. By the end of the game, that's going to be what happens. Alright, enough about Dota. We're about to stream it for the next two hours. Let's talk about Christmas.

Because this is... Are we going to do another one of these before Christmas? Yeah, we can do another one of these. We got anything to say? What date is it next Thursday? What date is it? The 16th. Oh, the 16th.

Yeah, that should be fine. My kids aren't even off school yet or anything. Yeah, same. I can do another one. Same. And then the 23rd would be the next one, if we did one. oh the 16th yeah that should be fine my kids aren't even off school yet or anything yeah same same and then the 23rd would be the next one if we did one 23rd i could probably do that the christmas eve eve special yeah i could find some stuff for us to talk about i mean christmas eve eve special i usually have a little a little note i haven't done any research this week though yeah i i mean i'm not at my computer, otherwise I would have things. I've got anything interesting.

I've been reading the rules to bolt action ready for Monday's game. Wait, how long are you down there for, Flax? When do you go home? Till Thursday, my friend. Oh my gosh. Like you're there for a whole week. One whole week. And then I've got to pick up my mum on the way back. So I've got to

drive from here down to Bournemouth and then back up back up to london but it's and does she stay for you guys over all of christmas yeah you sound almost um disappointed by this no it's gonna be great right which means i can't get drunk and lie on the sofa because she's like ted it's a mess in here clean up and if i don't she does and then i feel guilty so it kind of that's how they get you yeah yeah man parents you got to put your foot down you don't do that to your mom mate i'll tell you what no i i know you don't because she'll either bollock you or get upset and then you feel you either you feel bad either way no no he's saying you gotta put your foot down off the sofa stand up and clean it up yeah yeah sorry i misunderstood all right well you know this you're gonna do that you know when your kids are old enough you'll come around to

their house and tell them to tidy it never never i gave up getting them to tidy up yeah i go into their room and i say this is a disgrace that's That's what I always say. As if they're like, you bring dishonor on the house on four sides. But I just say, this is a disgrace. This is absolutely unbelievable. And there's like crisp packets shoved down the side of the bed and just things, clothes hanging off everything. Really? Yeah.

And I was like, tidy up. I told you to do this an hour ago. Oh, yeah. Feeble excuse. So I'm like, all right, well, you do it now or I'm going to take your ipad away for the rest of the week and they do it but it's like really half-arsed and i go i i come in and i just go yeah all right good job down for dinner and then the next day i come in and it's a mess

again and they've just tucked everything under we've spoken about this before sips i think the tidying consists of concealing i'm like that's not tidying that's camouflage all right you're not ambushing me you've this things have places to go your room the room the floor of the room is tidy and then you open their their wardrobe and everything comes falling out right yeah just shove everything in there sort of thing i mean i get it that's cleaning i say to them look i get it you've come home from school you've been looking forward to chilling out all day you know you've done your homework and now you just want to spend a couple of hours relaxing before dinner time and then it's into bedtime and stuff like that so i get it you want to chill but just don't come in and just throw things on the floor by default these are

your things i don't give a shit have you ever tried doing it uh back to them though like when you get home or whatever just get undressed and like leave your clothes all over like their floor and stuff just just just see what like just you know this is where my verse on them yeah just see just see what happens listen i don't want to put any of my things on their disgusting floor so no it wouldn't work just try it udo reverse that situation yeah yeah i don't know whether that ever works though with kids they just think you're suddenly into it now they just go like yeah see yeah of course we should all live this way i said you think oh why yeah why did i just store my stuff on the floor and then before you know it you're just a

even bigger slob than you were before. Slippery slope. Man, the baby is five months old now. Fuck, are you serious? Yeah, it's crazy, eh? God. She still sleeps really well, but she has a bit of a cold right now. So she's all snuffly. And I mean, she still sleeps, but she stays up a little bit later. And she sleeps less during the day.

So she's changing right before our eyes. Last night, we gave her her bottle and uh she was like fussing a bit because she was like all stuffy and she couldn't like couldn't breathe through her nose properly so she was getting all like annoyed and everything um so i was just like uh pacing around the room with her like rocking her and watching tv and she was still fussing a lot which is out of character she doesn't really fuss that much she's like generally pretty good so i laid her down on her mat um just like you know just to have a a break and just to give her a bit of a break or whatever i looked down at her and she did you know that you know the poop face when they just like they strain their face goes all red

and like just look like they look like darth, like, but with his mask taken off, you know, like that final scene. You're right about me, Luke. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I look down and it's that. Luke, I sold myself. And then just this fucking gurgling sound from her ass. Like, she just fucking just shit her pants. Like, so fucking hard.

And then she was just fine after that. I mean, babies are crazy. crazy yeah it's just insane what a wonderful what a wonderful story so heartwarming i know just ends with a big chair yeah yeah she sleeps so long at night Like sometimes she sleeps for like 12 hours straight. But we don't wake her up to like change her or whatever. My other kids were up all the time. They'd be up like every two hours. You get them up, change their diaper, whatever, give them milk, put them back to bed. Two hours later, same thing again or whatever.

This baby sleeps all the time. So she's got 12 hours worth of pee and poo in her diaper every morning and it's a disaster it's just like the whole thing is just hanging by a thread like it's every fucking square inch of it is just saturated with pee and poo it's hilarious we were invited to a friend's wedding one time and they were like no children and i'm sure i've told this before i left the i left uh this is our elder she would have been in nappy so she would have been very little left it with my sister who just lived down the road from the wedding and we were like can you look after you know until we get back for the wedding she was like yeah no problem when we went this was about a good six seven hours

later we went and her nappy was the biggest thing i've ever seen on a on a baby it was like yeah a huge growth on her yeah it's like an exaggerated version of a normal diaper and i was like did you not change her she's like i didn't know she'd gone i was like what do you think this is on her it's like drooping down it's ridiculous it was so like it soaked every molecule possible i think it was sucking water out of the air yeah it was at max capacity it was like a still suit it's like she thought it was a fucking still suit from june it's growing it's just like it's like one of those adverts where they just soak up like an entire you know it's literally like that like like plastic tray of of liquid blue liquid well the entire solent was

soaked up in that fucking nappy well i think when you give your children to people who don't have them they're terrified but they it's hard for them to say no right and it's also they don't really know what they're doing and they're terrified to make a mistake you know whereas you're just sort of it's just normal to you and you're used to it. It's also kind of just annoying to look after someone else's kid or pet or something for the weekend. I agree. I mean, looking after other people's kids, even when you know what you're doing is a fucking pain in the ass. Oh, my God.

Yeah. You can't tell other people's kids off the same way you can tell yours off, right? What if it chokes to death? Put down those little soldiers. They're not toys. You've broken that one. We're going to move away from those. They've been painted to perfection. Those aren't toys.

They're historical recreation miniatures. Not in your mouth. He's the officer. He's in charge. No, I need him. Put him down. he upranks you he's never gonna be fat now he's gone that's that's an hour so we should get ready for doter i reckon i'm i'm hungry enough yeah oh wait do we need to say goodbye on the

podcast now are we done oh yeah we'll say goodbye on the podcast and I guess we'll take a break we'll figure out what the hell we're doing yeah well that was

a bit of a show on episode 200 but we enjoyed it thank you everybody yeah we did have fun and good luck and God bless enjoy the Dota

we'll be more structured over Christmas I promise see you next time yeah bye see you in a bit

bye bye