Triforce! - Triforce! #294: Most dangerous jobs, most expensive consoles

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

Triforce! Episode 294! What's it like to work at Yogscast for work experience? Lewis and Flax feel super old filming trending tiktoks, we're looking at the 10 most dangerous jobs and we try to understand the pricing structure of game consoles! Visit www.katoskoffee.com and use code TRIFORCE for 5% off your entire order. Find something to suit your taste today! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Before we continue, this week's sponsor is Babbel, an app that I have been using in the last couple of weeks because I'm going on holiday this year. I'm going to France and Italy. Doing a little bit of time in each. And I'd like to be able to speak some French and or Italian depending on which of those two countries I'm in so I don't look like a complete bloody English tourist. No! I've got the Babbel app, and I'm trying to learn a little bit of extra, trying to polish up on my French and my Italian, just so I can walk in and say,

you know, good morning, how's it going? Have you got a table for four, please? I apologize for my children in advance, I'd like to say that. Their courses are super convenient, and they're genuinely gonna help you learn real-life conversational skills in a different language. It's easy to learn how to order food, ask for directions,

speak to people in shops without having to read off an app like a noob. And luckily we have a special limited time offer for our listeners. Right now, you can get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription but only for our listeners at babbel.com slash Triforce. That's 60% off at babbel.com slash Triforce and that is B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash Triforce. Term's 60% off at babbel.com slash triforce and that is B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash

triforce. Terms and conditions almost certainly apply but hey they got 16 million subscriptions sold worldwide and all 14 award-winning language courses are backed up by a 20-day money back guarantee. Give it a try! Give it a try! Get a huge discount money back guarantee. What have you got to lose? Learn a new language today with back now on with the show hello everyone welcome back to the triforce podcast here in lovely Britain, swimming through the after haze of a lovely successful football victory in the Euro 2024 semi-finals. And also, let's not forget, people who don't like football, there was a pretty big election victory recently in the UK as well.

Oh, that happened, yeah. We did politics last week. No more politics. No. I mean, no. No football either. What?! No football.

What?! We did that last week as well. Everybody's got football fever. It's the heat of the house, mate. It might actually be coming home, as well, this time. I've been very critical, I just wanna put a a couple of things on the record, I've been very critical of the England team. Last night was how we can play. That's what I want. We are capable of that, let's do more of that. Anyone who thinks that we should just scrape

our way through the tournament, coron our eyes out and praying, you're crazy. By the time this podcast goes out, it will be out all we have won. So there'll be a very different sentiment in people's minds. True. But honestly, last night's performance was the best of the tournament by us, it was a genuinely good game, and, y'know, we got lucky with the penalty, but, y'know, it is what it is, that's revenge for Ronald Kermit cheating way back when. So there you go. I was delighted- Ronald Kermit? Kermit. He cheated! Ask Graham Taylor all about it, rest in peace.

Ask anyone. Famously. Is it like one of those Maradona moments where he handballed into the goal and knocked it out? No, he hauled down. God, who was it that was clean through? Was it Lineker? Or Platt, maybe?

Either way, he- Someone was clean through. He hauled them down. Clean through. Someone was clean through and he hauled them down. Clean through. He hauled them down. And, uh, Cleaned through. He hauled them down. And no red card. So we've been building up karma ever since. So this is it.

This is it. You know, we haven't played the Dutch in a tournament since 1996. Isn't that crazy? That's really unusual. I really honestly thought we would have played them at some point. All those World Cups and Euros, we never bumped into them in a tournament, not in a group stage, never faced them in a knockout match, I don't think. Crazy. You know, there's that Scottish guy who always has the flag of whoever England are playing. Is it Ravs? No, I think it's actually most of Scotland. They were all flying like the Dutch flag yesterday. Yeah, it's a bit of a bounce, a bit of rivalry. England fans often can't take it. They left

a dish, it can't take it. I say, good bants. ALICE Football, let's not talk about it. It's such a choco-cheese thing. I think just the nature of the game, though. You can't risk not watching the game in case there's this, like, lat... It's surrounded by FOMO, right? You might just have 60 minutes of, or 90 minutes of really slow nothing loss, and you're like, ugh, that was miserable, why do I subject myself to this? But you have to do it in case there was that goal in the 90 minutes, you know what I mean, that loray the end or something, you know. Cause it's such an all or nothing as well, isn't it?

It's a very low, low scoring game. It kind of feels like you can have these high roll moments. I don't know, it's um, I don't know, it's like, exciting, isn't it? God, what am I saying? I say football is exciting. Can we, can we, um, I dunno, it's like, exciting, isn't it? God, what am I saying? I say football is exciting, can we move on? Sure, you brought it up! It has been really exciting, though. And frustrating, but exciting. It's been, I always like the big international tournaments, I watch them, I like them a lot. I watched them last night with my wife and my

youngest. Nice. Yeah, and she was really into it. I went mad. Mrs. F was like, please calm down. I was like, I can't. I can't calm down. I cannot, and I will not. Please calm down. I mean, how many wives were the same way?

But yeah, it was the same I think at the pavio stage, talking to some of the guys in the office who were at the Apple, which is the local cider barge. Got the two big screens. And it was just apparently chaos there. Yeah, no doubt. Chaos. People love football. Even if you don't know you love football, maybe you do. Secretly... I think all Brits are born with the passive trait, you know, secretly knows about, secretly wants to get happy, excited about England winning. Weird.

Weird. Weird how that happens. It's the bizarre patriotism built into us. We love our country, really. No, it's positive, actually. There's a lot of good energy in the UK right now, with the Tories being kicked out. I mean, just so that we don't... I know that people do get upset when they think the podcast is biased against the Tories or whoever.

Let me just say, I didn't vote in the election because I was away. I live in Twickenham, so our MP was Munira Wilson, a very inoffensive Lib Dem MP. By the way, the Lib Dems did incredibly well, which was a big surprise, but they did. If you're a conservative voter and you lost or a reform voter and you are bitter that you only got four MPs despite getting four million votes and want to complain about the system, I'm with you. We should have proportional representation. I think first past the post is kind of silly, but it is what it is. And hey, you lost, get over it is what you guys always love to say. So what I'm saying is, we're not biased, I don't really

think anybody's gonna improve the country, I've kinda dipped on politics and given up altogether. I think they're all shit. ALICE But we could have a break from it for a while now. SEAN Yeah, I just don't want to really think about it. ALICE Well you will have a break from it for a while now. SEAN Except for the next three months of American version of it. SEAN Do you know what, so did you watch John Oliver's

thing? This is current events, let's say rather than politics. John Oliver's thing that he did, he's only on Mondays I think on The Daily Show, and he was talking about the fact that they're gonna keep Biden despite the fact that he's a billion years old and everybody's like, oh yeah, we gotta back Joe. They said it's only four months to the election, we can't take a chance. And he pointed out that in the UK we had called an election and had it within a month, in France they had a bunch of elections in a very short time, what is it about America where they feel that you need like two years to build up? ALICE I have no idea.

SEAN You could absolutely grab someone and elect them. You just find a good person, it doesn't have to be this colossal campaign. ALICE I need plenty of time to make me a decision. They call me slow. Slow? They call me slow! They've called me slow before. But I think I'm making a wise decision by taking at least two years to decide which of these old fucking men I would like to be the leader of the free world.

It's just silly. You don't need... Four months is fucking forever! How do they need so long? It is funny. It's dumb. I think it's because the news cycle has this kind of constant countdown to things, right? And it's kind of, sometimes the countdown is fairly ludicrous. You know, it's like, countdown to Independence Day. We've got just over 37 days left until Independence Day.

What are you gonna do? How will you prepare? It's like we're being invaded, or an asteroid is coming. Like, that I don't understand. There's some sort of event, everything's got this breaking news, only 64 days until Halloween. It's like, well, okay, why? Oh my god! I can't wait! It gives everything this increased gravitas, to have a constant, frightening count there.

Yeah, it's kind of... it's crazy anyway, yeah, like, the American politics, who knows what's gonna happen. It is like popcorn. There's that gif of the guy eating popcorn, or the popcorn cat. That's what I feel like right now. Just constantly being like, mmm. This is so exciting. I'm excited. What else have you guys done this week? Anything unrelated to those two things? I've been playing, I played a little bit of, I started playing Cyberpunk, which I've enjoyed so far. It's a big, overwhelming game for me, though, I find it very big.

But it is very cool, though. I've been playing some Sea of Thieves, I've been playing some Sea of Thieves with my son, and then playing it a little bit on stream and stuff as well, which has been really fun. It's really- That's really wholesome. Really wholesome, really fun. And in my spare time I've been playing Football Manager Touch 24 on my tablet, which I've enjoyed so much.

I could talk about it for everybody, but I won't, but I have loved it. Football Manager Touch 24. Yes. It is really- It's like the mobile version of Football Manager. I'm trying to convince six viewers, I'm trying to convince him to stream some Football Manager when the new one comes out, and build a Sips dynasty. You can also rename the players, so you can rename them after viewers, or whatever you

want it, if you want. So just saying. You can make them worth millions. You can promise them the stars, and then deliver them sewage, and you know, it's great. Yeah. You can do it all. It's a really fun game. I've got...

Oh, I live in Dover, it's my most played game, the football managers. Yes, you used to just do that. You used to just do that, yeah. Only that. I have not actually been able to stream much. Obviously I was in Bristol for a week, which was really good, we recorded an episode down there. It was good to see everyone. My eldest, it was her work experience at the Yogs that week, she did work experience, which

was kind of a massive bit of generosity from Lewis, really, and I really appreciate it. But I thought it would be good for her to be in an environment where I can be there too, and sort of help her out and be there for her and everything and it was great. And she was really, really slot in very well, got on with everyone, and I want to give a shout out to Lulu and everybody for looking after her for that weekend. Thank you very much. It's a pleasure. I don't know if we talked about this with you, Sips, but it was quite interesting because, you know, when I did work experience at school, it was in a hotel and restaurant type situation, and my parents had sort of encouraged me to do it there because they

thought I could get a job there afterwards. They were like, well, y'know, if you go and show them how good you are during the work. So I went to work experience and they really just used me as a free labour, y'know, washing up, setting tables, y'know, serving people at the bar in the evenings, you know, washing up, setting tables, you know, serving people at the bar in the evenings, you know, like, well, not actually that wasn't... due to work experience I didn't do the evenings, but then they did hire me afterwards, unbelievably. My mum was like, vindicated. Such a parents thing, isn't it? For like, you know, oh, let's get him a summer job, but how's the best way to do that? Well, you know, let's not let

him do work experience anywhere he'd like to do or anywhere fun. Just like, imagine doing work experience at McDonald's or Sainsbury's or something, you know, like, like when you're... I mean, I did that. I worked at Sainsbury's when I was 16 anyway, but could you imagine, like, your parents pushing you to just get a real job and get you out of the house? So, I was a bit... I guess I never got the opportunity to do it somewhere fun, I don't know where I would have done it, but it was actually Daph and Sarah who were very keen to have your daughter around and show her all the different aspects of Yogs. So, from answering doorbell, to editing videos and filming TikToks, and, you

know, like running the streams, there's so much variety, actually, of what goes on in the Yogs, even though there's only a small team of us. Did your daughter enjoy editing TikToks for the Yogs? She did. She, oddly enough, she's a non-TikTok haver. She's like, nah, I just end up doomscrolling it, I don't want it on her phone. Which is very good self-control. Very aware.

Um, and yeah, that's quite a mature decision. But she installed it because Sarah wanted her to make a TikTok, which I was in. Which I didn't understand, it's one of those Sarah memes where you just have to shake your head and get on with it, but I didn't know what the fuck. These memes are Sarah's into. it. I didn't know what the fuck these memes are saying to us. She'll show you a video on her phone with a big smile on her face, right? Like you were meant to go, oh, amazing! But I'm just like...

Yeah, exactly, it's like some joke and you just don't understand it at all, and you're like, is this funny? And she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's really funny. And you're like, okay, and what do I have to do? And she's like, well, just look stupid and say this stupid thing. It'll take five seconds. And I'm like, okay, and what do I have to do? And she's like, well just look stupid and say this stupid thing. It'll take five seconds. And I'm like, okay, I'll do this. It's like the hawk-tur.

Do you want this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hawk-tur! Oh, god. Where is this thing? Where do these things catch on? That's the new skivity toilet. It's brain rot, honestly, these things, when they come along.

And it all kind of feeds on itself. It's like, back in the day we had YouTube poops, and I guess we still do, but it is like, how is this funny? So much. And almost like, if you ask someone, they say, well it's not really, but that's why it's funny. And you're like, oh, okay, it's one of those. It's like, I saw this cartoon yesterday, it was like these guys, I have to find it and share it with you, but basically it was two characters chatting, complaining,

one of them was complaining about, oh, how come they keep coming up with new words for everything? And the other one's like, well, you just have to get on with it or else you're old. And then in the next frame, his character, the cartoon character is like, massively aged, just like a withered old man. It's like, oh no, I'm old now. And I feel like that's... Every time this happens when Sarah shows me something, I just like, feel my hair greying and my face like, wrinkling.

I just feel like, actually feel the weight of the years. Physically aging. Wuthering me. It kind of makes me feel like Sarah is my agent. And she's got me a gig. And I'm like, really? And she's like, yes, this is great for you. And it's a role in some movie where it's inappropriate.

Like it feels like... This is what it's like. I'm not saying like, oh, I have too much gravitas. I'm just saying I am the wrong person for this role. I don't understand the bit. No, everyone's gonna be like, what the fuck is Flaq's doing there? And he's not gonna get it, and if he has to improvise around it, it's gonna be dreadful. That's how it feels for me. It's like you're Nick Cage's... You're Nick Cage. She's Nick Cage's agent.

And you've got a big tax bill to pay off, and you'll accept anything. Anything. Do you know what I mean? And, rather than, like, what you really wanna be is Bill Murray and have your answer phone or whatever, in order to peak your attention. People have to, like, give you some absolutely bonkers pitch, like Steve Zizou's, or whatever, you know, nonsense comes in. Right, right. Yeah. And you're like, oh, I'll do that weird fucking thing.

He only picks up for Wes Anderson or quirky stuff or things that he thinks is... I kind of appreciate that. Has Bill Murray been cancelled? I can't remember. Anyway. I don't think he's been cancelled, I think people... I think he has kind of a... like, a bad, a bit of a bad reputation, you know, for being awkward and...

Bit of a diva. Didn't he do something, is it Seth Green, that actor that was in the Austin Powers movies? He was in a movie with Bill Murray, and Bill Murray shook him over a bin, held him over a bin by one leg or something? Yeah, that's right. When he was a kid, yeah. Just a weird guy. I remember this.

Yeah, we talked about this on the podcast before, anyway. I do think his whole thing is, if it makes him laugh, it's worth doing. Like, everybody else is kind of second-guessing you. For sure. Which, I think there's probably a point in your life when you're in your prime, where people are with you on that, but I feel the older you get, the more out of touch with, you know, what you find is funny is what other the more out of touch with, y'know, what you find is funny is what other people find is funny as well, and then that's when you shake

somebody over a bin and everybody gets mad at you. Yeah. Could be. Although, well, maybe it's changed. He's in the... because he's doing the Ghostbusters again, isn't he? Yeah. From the latest two. Yeah, he's been in the...

Are either of them any good? I took my son to see both of them, and, I, I think a young person, you know, that's their... I think a lot of young people have probably seen the original Ghostbusters, and for us, we watch those again and we think, oh man, there's nothing better. There's a lot of nostalgia and everything, but for them, I think, to see a brand new movie with brand new effects and all that kind of stuff, it is, you know, it matters to them, I guess. My son likes the two more recent ones more than the originals, which is, you know... I tried to make him sleep out in the backyard and not feed him, but you can't get away with it, unfortunately. So...

I've been seeing reviews for this new Nick Cage movie called Long Legs, like it's a serial killer movie, it's meant to be very scary. It does look scary, the trailer looks fucking scary. So maybe Nick Cage is kind of back. Do you wanna be- Well, he can be as back as he wants to be. But I mean, I've played enough Garry's Mod over the years. Now, every time I see him, I just see Nicholas Pickles. I just see the stupid pickle

Nick Cage's face on it. So I don't think he's capable of scaring me. It doesn't matter what role he's in. Why didn't they just call him Nicholas Cage? Why did they call him Nicholas Pickles? I think they called it... I think it is Pickles Cage. But I just think Nicholas Pickles sounds sill Nicholas Piccolis sounds a lot more silly. Sounds like a German folk tale.

That's the story of Nicholas Piccolis. He will put a pickle up your bottom if you are naughty. Oh, now you're talking. Do you want to... here's a change of pace. Because we've been talking about our jobs, and obviously our jobs are kind of the most cushy jobs, really. So how about the ten most dangerous jobs in the UK? Ooh, okay.

Hang on, let me guess. It's gotta be working on an oil rig. Oil rig is not on there. Right. Okay. Well, is mining still a job? Mining is not on the list. It's just not done very much.

These are government figures on injuries and fatalities in the workplace. Okay, let me guess. It's gonna be... Okay, it's gonna be something, it's gonna be manual labour, like, it's gonna be something building right, like, um, roofing. Roofer. Roofer is not on the list. Aw, fuck.

We do have decent safety in the UK, I think, when it comes to things like that. Really? This is impressive. Yeah, health and safety is quite good. Well I guess it used to be, always used to be army, right? That used to be the most dangerous job. Right. They're not on there.

Not on there either. And then I guess the other two are emergency services, police, and fire? So fire and police are the top two. Okay. Wow, really? Is anything to do with fracking in there? Fracking is two. Okay. Wow, really? Is there anything to do with fracking in there? Fracking is not in there. What the hell?

So police and fire, obviously, is really... So, fire is the most dangerous, by far. By far? Yeah. It's like, they've given them this danger score out of a hundred. Firefighter is sixty-six. Here's the thing, there's only been one fatality in the firefighters in the last five years, this is a Forbes

article, that they looked at the study, but there's 47,530 injuries in that timeframe. So dangerous in that regard. ALICE What are we calling an injury, though? Cost a little burn? It'll burn your fingy! Or your plaster! Or is it like proper smoke inhalation? RILEY Why don't you be a firefighter then?

ALICE Why don't you be a burns victim as well, and see how it feels just to have a small burn on your finger. Yeah, go burn yourself right now. Get something really hot. And burn yourself. Before you judge people. One side of your body, just burn like, your whole arm.

The whole whole side, yeah. Let's see how that goes. How serious are these injuries? I dunno. But it's injuries, isn't it? It's probably bad. I think firefighters are almost comically reckless with their... and encouraged to be, right? It feels like, if you're gonna be a firefighter, you almost have to be so macho and manly,

and like, run into the fire to save people's cats, you know? And put yourself at risk. It's... Yeah! It's dangerous. Do you not think, like, it's kind of, through media and movies, you know, it almost like, deterministically makes people behave more recklessly. Because they're like, I am a firefighter, I must be reckless. Well I think, in the same way that Baywatch made lifeguards into this kind of, you know, pinnacle of manliness or sexiness, you know. Firefighters are always seen as like, you know, heroes. I think the fact that what they do is dangerous.

But name a more heroic thing you can do than go into someone's house and save someone, right? When it's on fire. Like, that feels like how TV shows would show that a hero is a hero. And they'd show that the bad guy was a bad guy by having him kick a dog or something. This is how it is. Or, I dunno. Do you see what I'm saying? What do you think number three is on the list? What do I think number three is?

Reepo man. No. Not really a big job over here. A sewage person. Sewage inspector. Nope. It's unusual that this is there, I didn't think it would be there, but imagine that you are surrounded by heavy things all day. A construction worker.

They are not on the list. Heavy things up on shelves, you have to move them around. Oh, like a warehouse person. Warehouse worker, number three. Oh, yeah, those forklifts and stuff. Yeah. Very dangerous. Stuff just tips over, you've got a lot of shit moving around.

Alright, number four. Imagine the most, I think it's either the most dangerous or the second most dangerous room in your house. Imagine working in that environment all the time. And it's not your second. Second most dangerous room in your house? What's the most dangerous room in your house? It's kitchen. So it's either the bathroom or the kitchen.

I think kitchen is most dangerous, but bathroom is very close. Oh, god. Sorry, I keep... Right, so in the bathroom you slip over and you bang your head, right, I remember, and in the kitchen there's got... Knives....you could say knives and stuff. So, like, cook? Chef? Fire, yeah. It's chef. Chef is there. Now, number five you'll never get. Care worker. Very... yeah. Cause I guess you're working with people. Wow, yeah. Wow, number five you'll never get. Care worker. Very- yeah. Because I guess you're working with people-

Wow, yeah. Wow, I would've said, maybe like, what about vet? Vet is not on there. Oh wow, okay. Believe it or not, the sixth most dangerous is working in retail. Yeah, probably because people get annoyed and they try to thump you. Yeah. I'll give you the other ones.

Check out these slippages. Truck driver, kitchen assistant- Oh, driver. Should've said driver. Nursing assistant. And then the last one, prison officer. Obviously very- Oh wow. Prison officer.

Prison officer less dangerous than chef. Apparently so. Is this- I mean, you lock them up, right? Like that's the whole thing. There's gonna be dangerous elements, but a lot of the time you've got all kinds of systems as you don't just let the crazy people out, you know, they sort of, they're pretty, it's got all kinds of protections and stuff like that. But I mean, I know that at the

moment the prisons are like super underfunded and overloaded, very dangerous. So maybe it's getting worse. But the median salary for all of these jobs is really bad. Like, Firefighter is only 28k and that's for a very dangerous job. A lot of these jobs are very dangerous, but the pay is not great. Most of these jobs are around the 20-25k mark, and that's not good if you're a truck driver. ALICE Is that entry level, though, or is that...? RILEY It just says median salary, so... ALICE Right. RILEY Yeah.

I know in New York City the coppers earn a bloody fortune. I couldn't believe how much they get. I was astonished. ALICE Yeah, well it's a big place. RILEY It's different in America. It is different in America. It's different in America. Here's the fatal injury rate on the job in America is very different. Number one on the list, by far.

What do you think it is? ALICE In America? JUSTIN Yeah. Um, coal miner. JUSTIN No, mining is bottom of the list. ALICE Oh. Have we said it already? JUSTIN Logging.

ALICE Oh, logging, yeah. Of course. Yeah. God. JUSTIN 132 deaths per 100,000 workers. Oh, logging, yeah. Of course. Really? Yeah. 132 deaths per 100,000 workers. Yeah, that's a lot. That's pretty fucking bad. I mean, I guess, you know, trees are gonna fall where they fall, and chainsaw accidents,

and god knows what, but yeah, logs are dangerous, man. And then, believe it or not, second is aircraft pilots and flight engineers. Whoa. That's kinda surprised by that. That's not good news. But I wonder if that's little planes, you know? Because it tends to be big, but it tends to be little planes. And also flight engineers, I guess, getting run over or sucked into engines or god knows what. Roofers in the States is 47 fatalities per 100,000, so roofing much more dangerous in America, apparently.

Oh. Do they have bigger houses? I don't know. Maybe like the houses in the UK. They've got a lot of bungalows, you know. There's a lot less distance to fall. I think... here's a question for you guys. Whenever I'm in the States, I feel like there's a lot more repair work to be done on your house than there is in the UK.

Whenever I go to visit my dad, for example, he keeps his house like, you know, good order, but there's always something that they need someone in for. Like, the roof or the AC is broken, all this is broken, all that is broken. It's a lot of, I think it's because it's a harsher environment in a lot of places. I mean, Florida is very hot, but then also very wet. And there's,'know, the roofs must go through, you get tornadoes and shit like that, so maybe, I dunno, I dunno if there's any statistics on this, right into the mailbag. It feels to me like shit in America is broken when it comes to your house, a lot more than

it is in the UK. That was just my feeling whenever I went to the States, I was like, damn, something else needs to be fixed. It's always something. I think they got like the term ice, they got the weather and everything, it must all just add up. Quite a harsh climate, in some ways. ALICE Yeah, that's interesting.

Right in. JUSTIN Yeah, right in. If you're a roofer, let us know why it's so dangerous. ALICE Let us know. Yeah. Why is it so dangerous? JUSTIN Yeah. Why is it so dangerous?

ALICE Well, what are you doing up there? JUSTIN Yeah, what are you doing up there? ALICE Are you just, uh, are you just, um, accidentally hitting your little fingy-wingy and hurting it so it's not worth reporting, what are you doing up there? Are you just, uh, are you just, um, accidentally hitting your little fingy-wingy and hurting it so it's not worth reporting, or are you actually falling off and impaling yourself on a- on a stake that's, uh, sticking out from the lawn, or something like that? Write in, let us know. Let's- let's see.

What's going on. Before we continue, I listened to a podcast called A Better Paradise, Volume 1, An Aftermath. It's written by the team behind Red Dead Redemption and Grand Theft Auto. Wow. Oh wow. And it's really nice near future sci-fi. I love, I love near future sci-fi. It's 12 episodes long, very, very cool, like set in 2041, and it sort of talks about the ill-fated development of an ambitious but addictive digital game world. I won't do any spoilers,

but it's really cool and I really, really liked it. It's got an all-star cast, including Andrew Lincoln from The Walking Dead, Shamir Anderson, Rain Spencer, Patterson Joseph, you may have heard of. Yeah. All right, I'm going to listen to this for sure. It's called A Better Paradise. A Better Paradise. I've got it downloading on Spotify as we speak. Wow. It hit number one on Apple's Fiction Charts at launch. So you might have already seen it.

Wow. But yeah, check it out. It's, I love the idea of free audiobooks in podcast form. Hell yeah. So yeah, A Better Paradise, it's called. It's out now. It's available everywhere where you get your podcasts. So go and have a listen today and don't forget to follow A Better Paradise, it's called. It's out now. It's available everywhere where you get your podcasts. So go and have a listen today and don't forget to follow A Better Paradise

on your platform of choice to make sure you never miss an episode. Go and check it out. On with the show. On with the show. Do you love dogs? Yes. Do you love coffee? Yes, of course. What about coffee with a dogs? Yes. Do you love coffee? Yes, of course. What about coffee with a K? Yes Well, then I've got a brand for you Kato's coffee. That's Kato with a K and also coffee with a K Wow, they love coffee and they love dogs

So do I! Well, you know you can get premium coffee roasted to order just deliver to your house Jeez! It's pet and planet friendly Support animal welfare and eco-friendly practices with every purchase. Delicious. Flavor profiles expertly roasted for a smooth, flavorful experience every time. That's the coffee, not the dogs. Make a difference.

Your morning cup contributes to positive change for pets and the environment. And if coffee isn't your thing, try their delicious range of peas. Yeah, you can also get their merchandise, your line of merchandise for you and for your furry friend. No way. They cover all the bases, yes.

That sounds amazing. Do you have some sort of promo code? I do. Do you know what? You can go to www.Katoescoffee.com. Remember, that's Katoes and coffee with a K and use code TRYFORCE for 5% off your entire order. Find something to suit your taste today. I love using the net. Well then go to www.Katoescoffee.com. So, got some news. Yeah.

A man has been arrested in the UK. Jailed for four months. The offense that got him in trouble, that sent him to jail, was carrying a six inch long Zelda sword made of actual metal. But it's like a replica. He was holding a six inch long Zelda sword in public, and... They thought it was a dagger. That's not allowed. ALICE Right. And I mean, it's not really, though, is it?

JUSTIN No. ALICE He's getting four months and a 154 pound fine. What a specific amount. ALICE Yeah. Very specific. ALICE It was not a prop, the blade was sharp. ALICE It was a sharp blade. JUSTIN That is... is that really an imprisonable offense?

ALICE Apparently he had a string of past offenses, uh, Cooke-Burkery... ALICE He was brandishing it. Brandishing a rep... ALICE So this wasn't his first rodeo. And you know, maybe it's time to give him a little slap on the wrist. In prison! ALICE I don't know if prison is... RILEY He said he used it as a fidget toy to keep his

hands busy. ALICE Four months seems excessive, but... RILEY Four months! It is possible to find fidget toys that aren't six inch blades. It is possible not to walk down the street holding them out in front of you, with a bit more self-awareness, Bray could have avoided contact with us completely. That's the police's statement. And that's true.

Saying, it's my fidget toy, and then it's a small knife. It's tiny, though. It's so small! It's crazy that he was nicked for this. Yeah, but what if he stabbed somebody that you know though with it? I mean, I guess if he was walking down the street carrying a kitchen knife, he'd also be nicked for that. Which you don't see every day either, to be fair.

No, that's true. I think walking around with it in public is the issue. I think anybody walking around with a knife, you have to just wonder, hey, I'm looking around, I don't see anyone else walking around with a knife, you have to just wonder, hey, I'm looking around, I don't see anyone else walking around with a knife, except for this one guy. Yeah, it's true. Yes. Well, you know, don't walk around with a knife, I guess. It's not that hard. Most people don't do it. It's not hard. Yep. Don't do it. Don't do it.

Top Gear accidentally looked like they accidentally leaked an Xbox could be installed in driverless taxis and cars. There's a robo-taxi being built, by a Bugatti-led consortium. And the idea is that, y'know, it'll be... Like Johnny cars from Total Recall. Driverless taxis, they're the future, right? It's getting there, who knows how long it'll take till it's actually a thing. But the idea is that you'll be able to get into a taxi and there'll be just...

You won't even be able to see the windscreen. It'll just be a 43 inch screen there with an Xbox. What, and do you drive the car with the Xbox? No, you don't drive the car. It's driverless. It's all automated. You just put in where you want to go and it takes you there. I want Windows. I do not want to go and it takes you there. I want Windows. You want Windows? I do not want to be in a vehicle with no Windows, thank you.

Oh, I think Xbox, Windows, yeah, it's all Microsoft, so it should... Very good. I want Windows. I will not get in a car with no Windows. It should be cross-platform, yeah. Very good. Uh, fuck it up. Next, um...

You love that one. A game that was delayed for 22 years is finally out. What is it? Well, in 2002, a group of friends in Italy started developing an action platformer for Nintendo's Game Boy Advance. They got distracted, or something. Right. And finally, 22 years later... The first wall broke out! That's what happened.

So, yeah. Lots of guys worked on this and it was ready. Almost ready to go. But, once the game was finished, the high costs of shipping the game on Gameboy carts, and the risk that it might not be successful, led to no publisher wanting to release the game. So, eventually only one member of the team remained. Despite believing in the unpublished game, he moved on with his life, and started creating educational games for kids and teens. But he never gave up hope. So he's like, launched, he's finally found a publisher, and they're

launching it on classic consoles. And it was, there you go, it's called Keen. K-I-E-N. Interesting. Check it out. There's a, you can buy a physical copy for the Game Boy Advance, or there's a digital version that you can play on an emulator. There you go. So finally it's, it's available on cartridge. I've got, I've got something to talk to you guys about that brings something to my mind that I was thinking about during the week, and I really want to see what

your take is and see if anyone can explain this to me. There must be a way that these companies come up with the price for the consoles. It must be based around some consumer price index thing or there must just be an amount. Because adjusted for inflation, how much do you think the NES cost when it came out in 1985? Adjusted for inflation. They also figure out how much it costs to create one as well, so there's that factor in too. Right, but that would've... Y'all understand why...

I get that question, but I think it's totally irrelevant. I'll explain why in a moment. How much adjusted for inflation in 1985, the Nintendo Entertainment System came out, the NES, the classic, adjusted for inflation, how much would it cost now? I think, I don't know, in the UK... This is America. Well, yeah, I think in the UK it costs about, I wanna say, 250 or 300 pounds, probably? Okay, so its original price was 200 bucks. Adjusted for inflation was 562 pounds. Okay.

How much does... yeah, 562. Bucks or pounds? Dollars. PlayStation 5 came out in 2020, $589 adjusted for inflation. So what I'm saying is the PS5 and the NES have 40 years separating them, more or less, and they still basically cost 500 bucks or whatever the equivalent would have been back then. And if you look at these prices, I've gone and I've looked at the prices, the launch prices of consoles over the years, and they all seem to be around that $500 mark. Certainly the successful ones. Yeah.

$400 to $500. The Game Boy and stuff like that is cheaper, the Switch is cheaper, because it's smaller, it's not as big. Xbox Series X around about $500, $550. What is it about that amount that means it hasn't changed? And you're saying, oh, they're cheaper to make or they're more expensive to make. Apparently not, because although they're working out

how much it costs them to make, it's apparently costing them the same amount as it was back then relative to the cost of the console. What is happening that $500 is seen as like, the amount, you know, either way, that people will pay? Even if that's the equivalent of $500 back in 1985 was $200. Okay, there's a lot of factors here. Obviously, first of all, political factors in the, you know, the cost of living and the cost of the amount of disposable income people have. What

can they afford? I'm sure they focus grouped people and said, how much would you pay for this? And then they work backwards. They're like, okay, we need this thing to cost this much. That means we need to have this many. That means we need to have them made for this much. And so then they go to the chip makers and the other people and they power it at the level that they can afford. It's like, well, we can afford to have this, therefore we'll have this much RAM in there, this much processing power in there, which is why they're all slightly different, because they each source their own things. And they also look at their competitors and they're like, well, looks like these guys have announced

it's gonna have this level of power, we can just do the same, or we should do the same, because we want to launch the same games on our platform and they want to be similar. You don't want to be making games for one platform that can't run on the other one, right? So, there's a huge amount of thought that goes into this. But I assume the grounding one is that it is what people are used to paying. They paid that, they had to pay it before and it's familiar, right? I think sometimes we've complained about games recently being 70 dollars, or sort of 70 pounds. Most of them are still 30 quid.

For games. But yeah, 30 quid feels like... No, they're like 70 now. They're expensive. No, no, no, not all. Look, so we've invented this triple A and quadruple A and all this shit, I get it. That's a relatively recent thing. For the longest time, going back to when I was a kid, games cost thirty quid. That was it. ALICE Well, I will say, when I bought Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time back in the 90s, I think I paid fifty quid for it. RILEY You were ripped off. I mean, but I guess Nintendo

and these big AAA titles, they always charge more. ALICE Nintendo stuff's always been pretty expensive to be honest. RILEY Yeah. And it retains its value really well. If you ever have a Nintendo game and you want to ship it to CEX or whoever, they'll give you decent money for it compared to fucking PS3 games. I mean, Nintendo just has that cache, I'd say. Also, it never feels like their consoles are just a better version of the one that came before.

It does feel different. Like the GameCube, the Wii U, the Switch all feel different enough that you don't feel like, oh, it's just the same thing. Whereas Xbox is just the better version of the previous Xbox. I always felt like Nintendo were pretty good at that, at making it feel like a unique thing you were getting. Like you compare the GameCube, the Game Boy, and the Wii, they're all very different experiences, I'd say. Here's another interesting thing looking at this this list is the ones that didn't fucking make it were the ones that charged way over the odds.

For example, the Intellivision came out in 1980, the Mattel Intellivision, adjusted for inflation, $1,164. That didn't last. The Atari Lynx, which was a handheld, it had a color screen, that was $440. ALICE I have one of those in my house right now, my wife had one when she was a kid. RILEY So that was twice the price of the Game Boy. Which is the most successful console at all times.

ALICE I think that sometimes though, with these guys, these things were marketed to different groups of people, right? Like, sometimes they were marketed as, you could do your accounts on them, right? Sometimes they were marketed in different ways at different groups. And also, if you put the price to a certain level, when you're working with economics, like the idea is that you're gonna have to make a lot less, right? If you think you're gonna sell a thousand, there's no point in putting the price low, because suddenly there's ten thousand orders or whatever. Sometimes people start with a higher price, and then if it doesn't sell out, they reduce the price. So that way you make as much money as you can without having to overproduce, or... If

you accidentally make twice as many as you need, you're fucked. It doesn't matter how well you sold, right? Cause you're never gonna turn a profit on all... You're gonna have to get a landfill and dump all the ET cartridges in it or whatever. Did you ever hear of the Turbo Express? Yes. No. Turbo...

That is a PC engine. Turbo Express, is that anything to do with the TurboGrafx-16? I think it's by NEC Home Electronics. Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're maybe the same thing, or maybe just different versions of each other, but... So it's like a Game Boy. So the TurboGrafx-16 was a bigger console. The Turbo Express was like the Game Boy.

But it cost $571 in 1990. They're all trying to get on the Game Boy action, and none of them could do it for the price that they're doing. Well get on the Game Boy action. And none of them could do it for the price that they've been doing. Well, this is the case today. Xbox have been saying, you know, there's been a lot of rumblings that Xbox will have a Switch version, you know, because the Steam Deck's done really well. Yeah. Switch is basically, Switch is kind of uncontested. And it's almost like, well, why don't we have

a handheld Xbox? It's mad. And so there will be, almost certainly. Will it be shaped like a big X? A huge X you've gotta lug around. Well, that's what the original Xbox was like, didn't it? It was terrible looking. Massive chugging boy. I remember when the original TurboGrafx-16 came out, the big selling point of it was this game called, I think it was Bonk's Adventure or something?

And it was this small bald caveman that headbutted stuff with his bald head. I'm pretty sure it was Bonk's Adventure, let me see. Bonk's Adventure. Oh my god, this looks terrible. Yeah, here it is, console game. It looks like Dizzy's Quest or something. Yeah, it's, yeah, Bonk's Adventure, there he is, this little bald caveman. Bonk's Adventure, known as PC Genjin in Japan, PC Kid and BC Kid in Europe, a scrolling platform

game developed by Red Company and Atlas and released in 1989 in Japan, 1990 in North America for the PC Engine TurboGrafx-16. There you go. I remember the ads for it and everything. At the time when the ads were coming out, I mean, you gotta remember, this is around the time that the Super Nintendo was coming out. And it was like, oh my god. Super Nintendo was 1991.

I don't think I knew a single person who owned a TurboGrafx-16 or Bonk's Adventure, but everybody wanted to get it. But most people just got a Super Nintendo instead. Yeah. I think it's hard to overstate just how huge the NES and the Super NES were. Oh, in North America they were sensational. They were massive in America. I think over here, it was more Sega. Like I remember a lot of my mates had Segas.

I had the SNES, like I fucking loved my Super Nintendo, I absolutely loved it. But everybody seemed to have Sega's. I was never a big... I hated Sonic, I thought it was shit. I loved Mario. They all wanted the Game Gear and I wanted the Game Boy, they all had the Sega Megasystem and everything. But here's where it gets interesting, the 3DO interactive.

This was a CD... 3DO, I remember that. 3DO. That cost, adjusted for inflation, nearly 1500 quid. Jesus Christ. What were they thinking? It's like the most expensive console on the list by far. Yeah. So, okay, I remember playing this game called Fantastic Dizzy on the...

Yeah, yeah, yeah. ...commerz. Right? It was an egg. So the game was planned for Christmas 1990, but because of legal actions it was delayed, so it missed the Christmas rush anyway. It ended up selling only 125,000 units, which is quite a lot, instead of the expected half a million. So yeah, I mean, I imagine that was absolutely punishing for them. I guess what happened to all those unsolved ones... Yeah, I guess, maybe they were making them as they went, but, like, god, such a risk,

isn't it? It's always been the same, right? Like, console battles and the... Not changed really in 40 years. These battles of consoles, battles of handhelds, Christmas, saving your game for Christmas launch, getting it done in time, missing targets, having a flop when everyone thinks it's gonna be good. I feel like Sony have kind of dominated the console thing for a while.

I don't know if I'm wrong, it always feels like PlayStation is like the one. ALICE I think Xbox does really, really, really well too. I mean, I don't know if there's a... SEAN If we look at most successful consoles... ALICE But all the other dominates, I think they're both pretty... SEAN We did this before, right? ALICE Pretty good.

ALICE I don't remember, but I think it's actually, you'll be surprised how even it is between the three of them. SEAN So what do you think? So I think it's between two companies. I think it's actually, you'll be surprised how even it is between the three of them. So what do you think? I think it's between two companies. I think it's between Sony and Nintendo. And just looking at the number here, the best that Microsoft had done was the Xbox 360 in 2005. That was very successful.

Right. But, that is number one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight... That is number nine on the list. And that was twenty years ago. Yeah. I mean, I think number two... Number one is the one which was also a DVD player. Because a lot of people bought PlayStation 2 to be a DVD player.

It's the two. Yeah. 155 million units sold. I think it's because they decided to go into the create-your-own-console tech path, rather than doing the service MMO tech path. You know, when Vony released their big... Yeah. Sorry. Little Easter egg reference there for anyone.

You know what I mean. Little game dev tycoon joke for you there. The moment you said Vony, I was like, hell yeah. Ninhvento and AND VONI. So the Nintendo DS is the second most popular. Yeah. I feel like the Switch is in such a unique spot because its demographic, I feel, is a lot different to the PlayStation.

The price point is lower and the target demographic is different as well. Yeah, it's third, the Switch is third, then the Game Boy, then the PS4. So this is all like Sony atop, PS2 legendary console, then the next three are Nintendo. And that's from 1989, 1998, 2004, 2017. Well, where did the PlayStation come that also includes the Game Boy Color. 1994. Yeah. So, I mean...

That's the PlayStation. 102 million units sold. So before the PlayStation even came out, you had the NES, the Super NES, and the Game Boy. Which were three mega, mega releases. Huge. Huge. That's before Sony released one console. so they would have been behind already.

So the thing is, the Wii is the most successful Nintendo console. Yeah. Cause the DS, the Switch, the Game Boy, the Game Boy Color are their four most successful, but they're all handheld. The Wii was mad though. The Wii was 2006, that is their most successful, everybody bought that. It was so innovative, there was nothing like it at the time. Do you remember all the pictures of people that had broken their TVs?

Yeah, yeah, doing bowling and just launching your controller through your TV and stuff. Cause it always had, when you loaded the game up, it had the thing saying, make sure the strap is tightly on your wrist, and people were like, fuck off, Nintendo, I know what I'm doing. BAM! Destroy their television. Yeah. Nintendo, I know what I'm doing! BAM! Destroy their television. But then it's the PS3, then the Xbox 360, then the Game Boy Advance, the PSP, the PlayStation Portable, which I had one, that was decent, the NES isn't on the list, it's not in the

top ten. Sold 61 million units in 1983. ALICE Yeah, but it's because of the time, the day and age. People didn't buy consoles as much as they did now. This was the start of, I mean, before that, the most successful console was the Atari, right? The home console. No, so, let me check.

The Atari 2600 sold 30 million in 1977, we had one, back in the day. So after that, there's nothing from that era. It would've been the NES, yeah. Yeah. we had one, back in the day. So after that, there's nothing from that era. ALICE It would've been the NES, yeah. ALICE The NES would've been the big one. So the Atari set some foundation for home consoles, NES just opened up the market for home consoles. But having said that, it's one of those things, it was new at the time.

It's kinda like when, it'd be similar to like when TVs first came out. Not everybody had a TV straight away, you know what I mean? It was like, it took a while for society to convince itself that this was a required item in every single household and that you were an idiot if you didn't have one sort of thing. So I think that all that is, if you think about consoles, if they came out in the 70s, which is when I was a child, I wanted one. But my parents and other older people might have got one for a gimmick, but they didn't really play it. If you brought out a console for grownups, it wouldn't work, because the games were too simple. As we've gotten older and had kids, and then our kids have had kids, you've got this whole triple threat generation of

video game consumers that will buy games. I will buy games until the day I die, and my kids will, and their kids will, and so you've almost got this swell of people who grew up with gaming and love it, continuing as a cohort and having kids who also then grew up with games. So we think any new technology is gonna have that same thing, where older people are gonna be like, I don't need no new thing or games. When I was a kid, we had a Colecovision,

but it wasn't something that... You had a Colecovision? Yeah, my dad had one. Oh my god, I'm so sorry. But it wasn't like it is now for a console. Console now, you'll have it plugged in all the time and you'll use it for all sorts of things, right? People will stream music, movies, everything through their consoles.

NICHOLAS It's the only way I can play a Blu-ray. ALICE It is, yeah. It is a must have thing in your living room, or whatever TV it's hooked up to, it's used all the time. But like, the Coleco was not even hooked up all the time. It was something, it was brought out like, you know, like, the Coleco was not even hooked up all the time. It was brought out like, you know, Grandpa brings his slideshow thing out. It was like a board game.

Yeah. It was packed away, and then it was brought out because, you know, it was like, oh, it's raining, what are we gonna do? Let's get the Coleco vision out, or whatever. And we had Donkey Kong Jr. and a couple of other games on it. So I read recently that Japan declared war on floppy disks, right, and they've just recently declared victory two decades after floppy disks were mainly stopped. Well they've taken... so, Digital Minister Taro Kono says, we have won the war on floppy disks! Congratulations! Do they ever still exist? Oh, wow. Tarou Kono says we have won the war on floppy disks! Y'know. Congrats!

Finally! Do they even still exist? Oh, isn't it true that Japan is, like, they still claim to coin hold technology? When is the official VFD Day, then? So that we can remember it as we would D-Day and victory over in Europe and... There are people, I want a photo of two Japanese people kissing in the street. Yeah. As people tear up floppy disks behind them.

Confetti everywhere and just floppy disks burning, melting in a pile behind them. So yeah, they were really intense. Japan is a gerontocracy and it likes the hang on to fax machines and all these old things. But it's kind of starting to get a bit of a bad reputation on it, partly because there was so much paper filing and stuff going on during Covid, that it was like, really annoying to have people not being in the office with all the paper. So they started this big digital push and they've been changing stuff over. I mean, still though, like, when you worked at the bank we talked about this a lot, Sips, they used some old computers, didn't they, and some old code. Certainly a lot of the world still runs on old code, especially stuff that needs to be robust for

even, especially nuclear armaments and stuff. Yeah. Like, all the core banking stuff was run on IBM iSeries mainframes, which were, they came out in the 60s, I think. So like, Cobol or Fortran or something they're running on? Cobol, yeah. Even older than that, RPG. It's like, yeah, it's basically one-up from punch cards. I mean, the problem is, if it works, why are you gonna spend the money to fix it?

Well, I think there's a good argument at that. The issue is that there's a lack of replacement parts. For Cobalt? Well, for like old... No, no, this is... These mainframes, it's all specialists. It's almost like the equivalent of vintage cars now. It's an IBM thing, so you can't even get a technician, it's still all in-house

IBM. So, if something goes wrong, or you need a component, or you need to do maintenance, you have to go to IBM for it. Interesting. Well, you know, it's like, we have a really fancy coffee machine in the office, right? Oh, fuck that thing. And it went wrong. It's shit.

And, um... Actually,, and it went wrong. Oh, fuck that thing. It's shit. Actually, it didn't go wrong. The old coffee machine was working absolutely fine, but they said... Was it a tassimile? ...in order to keep the coffee machine... No, it's big. It was a little tassimile. This thing is big.

It's big. Anyway. It's like two printers strapped together. That's the biggest. We used to... well, this is the new one, VFLAax, but the old one, we had for a couple of years, it was great, it was really nice, worked fine, but we had to pay this subscription to get it from the people, or whatever, and they came around to fix it, or service it periodically, anyway.

A man came to service it, broke it, and it didn't work after he'd serviced it. So we went back to them, and we're like, your service has broken it, and they were like, oh, it's gonna cost you a thousand pounds to get it fixed. What?! Yeah, I do not understand that. Like, absolutely. And I was like, but you broke it! And they were like, yeah, but it's gonna cost you a thousand pounds to get it fixed.

And I was like, but you broke it! And they were like, yes. I would pick it up and I would take it to the lobby of their headquarters and I would smash it to pieces all over the place, and I'd say, there you go, you have it back. So we literally did that, we literally said, right, well, we're throwing it away. So we threw it away and we got a new one from a different company. It was honestly blew my mind. But this is...

Coffee people... We've got enough coffee people in the office that we have to have this incredibly fancy coffee machine that you pay thousands for. ALICE Yeah, you just like, get, like, make an agreement with the local coffee shop and just say, you know, we'll give you this much per month and just... JUSTIN Probably would have been cheaper, honestly. ALICE It probably would work out cheaper, and then

people could actually go outside. JUSTIN Cause this thing costs thousands. ALICE Yeah, that's crazy. JUSTIN More than five thousand would probably spend on this coffee machine. RILEY You know what, I reckon, I'm gonna be honest with you, I reckon the amount of racket these coffee machines make is all performative. You reckon? Yeah, I got a coffee yesterday.

It's ridiculous, it goes like, WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH!

WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! WRAAAAARGH! And then out comes a tiny bit of espresso, I was like, fuck off! What is all that? I'm thinking of games like, what was that, Death Stranding, and I'm also thinking of Cyberpunk, y'know? Let's get some quiet, really satisfying coffee machines, y'know?

You just put the cup in and it just goes like, shhhhhh. Yep, and there's your coffee. Bing bong! It's done. Have you guys got any tips for a game to play, or to show to someone who has never ever played any video games? Never played any video games ever? How old is this person? 35.

Oh, I know who this is. Ummm, hmmm. Never ever played video games. No. Do you know what my honest advice is for this? Do not show them a video game. Let them enjoy a video game free life. They've done it for 35 years, why not go the full hog down?

There's no point in getting into video games, I don't think, at the age of 35. Unless maybe you've had some sort of recovery from an accident or an addiction, or something like that, maybe? Like, you need to find a new hobby to fill a void in your life somehow, or whatever. But I think if you've gone that long without that as a hobby or whatever, you're not missing out on anything. How about Amnesia, the doctor said? No, I'm like, what? No, honestly, a genuine answer, Minecraft.

Get them into Star Citizen. Explain the buy-in and everything, and just get them to live the life, y'know? They don't even understand, like, the WASD. I would not bother, man. I would not bother. I would just say, you know what, it's I think Minecraft, very peaceful, sweet music. I would not bother, man. I would not bother. I would just say, you know what, it's really cool that I've met somebody who doesn't have

the same hobby as me, and let's just do that. Let's... I think genuinely, not as a Minecraft player, but I think I can see the appeal. Do you think Minecraft? Yeah! Well, I guess it is for four year olds, I guess. You know, my wife has never been into video games, ever. And really doesn't feel like she's missing out on anything, and she gets her full fill of video games just from hearing me and my son talking about them.

And she honestly says, that's enough. And then she just goes back to doing the things that she actually likes to do. Alright, Animal Crossing. The new Animal Crossing. That is one of the only games that Mrs. F will play. She's not a gamer. She used to play Civ 2 back in university, she was playing Civ. But she liked that one.

ALICE A keeper. A keeper. ALICE As soon as she was playing Civ 2 I was like, I'm married and this woman. ALICE Civ 2 was the first time my wife had ever experienced anyone play a video game for longer than an hour at a time. When we first met. And she was so mad. She came upstairs and I was playing Siv-2 and she's like, do you know how long you've

been playing this for? And I was like, no. She's like, it's been three hours. I was like, that's nothing. I'm only getting started. No? Nine hours? It's been three hours! I was like, that's nothing! That is nothing! I'm only getting started, and she's like, what the fuck? Like, fucking give me a quarter video for nine. I'm glad she could not believe it.

Yeah, like, I was playing Civ 2 yesterday. Civ 2? It was weird. Because me and Doug could've been doing a little playthrough for the Civ channel. We're playing all the Civ games. Oh, wow! We did Civ 1, we just started doing Civ 2. What did you think of Civ 1?

Did you play it for longer than three hours? Well, do you know what though? Because I've got Sid Meier's autobiography that he wrote, which is not worth reading, it's the boys' drawing. Okay, is it true that Robin Williams told him that he should put his name on all the games? No. But it was the marketing company that recommended it.

But he didn't even... I think he barely had anything to do with Civ 2! And it's basically the same as Civ 1, it's kind of unplayable. Civ 1 is totally unplayable, because you need... I loved Sid Meier's colonization, colonization, the first one? Yeah, I loved that. Oh, it was so good. Man, the music is...

Colonization, honestly great, me and Ben did a playthrough of that a few years ago, and I remember playing that, loved that. But Civ 1 is actually quite hard to play now, because it's got copy protection, you have to have a manual. And so every now and then, a little screen pops up and says, oh, what's the picture on page 94? And you have to, like, scroll through, and if you don't get it right, it deletes all of your units. Every unit you've got.

Which is pretty bad. When we used to pirate games back in the day, my dad would post me cards or just letters, and in the card would be a stack of floppy disks. Like the big ones. And there would be ten games on there that he'd got. Because I didn't have any money, and the games were, like I said, like inexpensive. ALICE He just ran an EXE off of the disk, yeah. Because he's a peasy.

SEAN Yeah, so, I wasn't even an EXE. He just copied it. Like, he just literally copied disk to disk. But like, Leisure Suit Larry, which everybody had a copy of Leisure Suit Larry on the PC, that was a good option. ALICE Is that Leisure Suit Larry in the Pursuit of Passionate Patty? SEAN No, unless that's the very first one. ALICE Leger Suit Larry in the Land of Lounge Lizards is the first one. SEAN So that was the one, and it had the copy

protection laws, it asked you trivia that only old people would know. ALICE They all did. All of the Leger Suit Larrys did. SEAN Which I thought was hilarious. ALICE It was all like references to like dead presidents, and old talk show hosts hosts and shit like that. No kid could ever guess them. NIGEL So it could be you were 18. RILEY And if you got it wrong, it just booted you

back out. But you could just brute force it, by noting down what the right answers were. Also, sometimes your pirated copy would come with a photocopy of the manual. So you could get, one person would buy it, and then you'd get photocopy of that manual, and then when you give someone a copy of your copy, you photograph the manual, so you could get, y'know, one person would buy it, and then you'd get photocopy of that manual, and then when you give someone a copy of your copy, you photograph the manual again, so we're just getting fainter and fainter and fainter. All the LucasArts point and click adventure games, the early ones, had those code wheels, you remember them?

Yes, the code wheels. And you couldn't photocopy them, that was what was crazy about them. Oh my god. So, yeah, let's shoot Larry, the original porn game. Um... Well, it was. There was like no porn in Sandbox or whatever. Nothing changes.

It was the Baldur's Gate 3 of its day. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, I guess it was. It probably was, actually. Yeah, it was. Yeah. Nothing fucking changes. There was a Leisure Suit Larry game that came out, like, not that long ago, actually.

I don't know what the hell happened to it, but they did a bunch of remakes of the originals. But man, there were so many Leisure Suit Larry games. That's back when Sierra had Leisure Suit Larry, it had King's Quest, it had Police Quest, and it had Space Quest. You remember those series of point and click adventure games? Yeah, Sierra was amazing. They were brutal though. You really had to save early, save often, as they often recommended you do, because

you could really just die all the damn time and lose a lot of progress. I mean, they made a game called Soft Porn Adventure in 1981. How about that? That's one that I missed, sadly, but maybe it's never too late. Apple cider spider. Maybe you could recommend that to your 35-year year old friend who's never gamed before. It's an entry. BC's Quest for Tires.

Oh my God. I remember this game. BC's Quest for Tires. I had this. You were like it was based on a comic called BC, like a comic strip. And it was he was just a caveman. And he was just a caveman. And this was just a side scroll. I fucking haven't thought about that in 40 years.

You remember that old... PC's Quest for Tires. That old Amiga game called ARG. And you could play as like Godzilla or King Kong or someone else. And uh... That's Rampage. No, it was... Rampage! The original one was called, okay, maybe ARG is different.

It's called ARG, and the whole thing was, you didn't have a life total, it was a speech bubble that formed the word ARG, and if you completed it you died. Because if you took damage or whatever. ARG video game. Oh, there it is! I seem to remember you smashing down buildings, rampage style and stuff as well. So, you control a giant monster with the goal of obtaining eggs by destroying buildings. It was ported to a range of platforms.

There it is, ARG. ARG. What a funny game. Fucking weirdest game, yeah. God, it came out on the Atari ST as well. Now there was a... the Amiga and Atari ST, those were the fucking bee's knees. The bee's knees. Just the flippin'.

Amiga was better, but my mate had an Atari ST, and when you had some specific games that were only on one or the other, it felt bad. It felt real bad. Just the flippin' best ones. I just loved Amiga. Go and treat yourselves, go and play some games. Yeah. I bought an Amiga on eBay about ten years ago and it didn't fucking them. Well, go and treat yourselves, go play some games. Yeah. I bought an Amiga on eBay about ten years ago and it didn't fucking work.

God, I love gaming. I mean, I love it so much. Go games, it's brilliant. Alright, I've gotta go and have lunch with my lovely parents. Alright, have your lunch. Alright. Have your lunch. Alright, thank you everyone for joining us this week, we'll see you next time.

See you next time, bye! Goodbye! Goodbye!