Triforce! - Triforce! #75: Fortnite 2: Porknite

Episode Date: September 19, 2018

Triforce! Episode 75! The guys talk about games, their childhood, porn and... the same old crap. Are you still listening!?   Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please play responsibly. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the Triforce podcast. Welcome back! Sips, how you doing? Welcome back! P-Flex, how you doing? Oh man, it was a good podcast last week, I enjoyed it. Oh yeah, it was the best one.

I'm ready for a brand new one. What have we done? How could we possibly top last week's podcast, which had riveting conversations such as creepy seducer Gollum? And what else did we talk about? Zombie cruise ship. Zombie cruise ships. Yes.

We surprised people last week because they expected a six week break. Because of course, the previous one we'd said see you in six weeks yeah and then yeah and then some dumbo forgot to send his moron for some fucking idiot who would do that unprofessional unprofessionalism really just dropped the ball on that one it really could be either of you couldn't it honestly come on yeah mind them yeah i mean i guess give me a break give me a break sarge i mean sips goes into the day six weeks those fucking guys in the in wars who are told you you and you get up that hill and attack that machine gun sarge i'm not ready to die i'm gonna die i'm literally going to die yeah we're gonna find out how many bullets i got left so get up that hill geez that's right that's real war yeah let's

call in an airstrike shit yeah this is literally here's a grenade just run up there and try and throw it in that little hole and try not to get shot and you might get might get shot but off you go and they just did it. Nowadays, imagine these goddamn millennials. Imagine trying to tell them to do it. They'd say, I don't feel like it. Do we have to? I'm not going to.

This is unfair. I'm going to refer you to the working practices board for Machine Gun Nest attacking. And they'll have stern words with you, sir. This is why society should pay all of my bills. I'll do it for college tuition. Alright, here's the form.

It fell down the trip. He just busts out all of the All of the legal documents Paperwork! Paperwork! I need a pen over here! Guy running through mortars to bring the paper work Fucking hilarious I need three men, I want you to run across this minefield

To get the paperwork To run this guy up the hill and take out the machine gun nest Sarge, we're gonna need paperwork on that God damn it! We're gonna need a! We're going to need a ladder. We're going to need a specific ladder, too. We can't just give them the old splintery ladder. No, it's got to be a new ladder.

It's got to be a brand new one. It's got to conform to standards. Ladder inspector, you've got to be a front and center. Board for duty, Sarge. Inspect that ladder. Sarge, I need Ford Fairlady for duty Sarge inspect that ladder Sarge running forward for a long trip good to inspect that ladder

that's how it was it would be rubbish now that's why they used drones that's why there's not going to ever be a World War 3 it would just get totally bogged down

in red tape I don't feel like charging today you hurt my feelings and they'd want like a comfy area to relax in with your Nintendos and drinks

machines and cool sofas and sculptures and artwork and stuff oh millennials ruining war what have you done yeah look what you've done now millennials i mean technically i think i am a millennial though i think in what way well because the the the the date of birth range is like, it varies depending on who you speak to. But I was born in 1980, which is... You're Generation X, amigo. I consider myself Generation X, but there are naysayers out there, probably flat earthers, let's be honest, who say that if you were born in 1980, you're technically a millennial, but I don't think I am, actually. A person reaching young adulthood in the early 21st century,

that would put you out, unless you think that 20 is young adulthood or 21. I think we just about missed it. I think it was like 81, 82. I think the way you could tell is if you like pokemon then you're a millennial i think that's that's probably that's how they should measure it now yeah because pokemon again i mean i i've said this a million times and i maintain it i was too old to enjoy pokemon i was exactly when it came out i was in pretty much high school you were punching the people who were into pokemon yeah well yeah pretty much yeah i was i forced them into a small red ball

and then i'd throw them at other nerds yeah and make them do battle yeah that's that's pretty much how it went yeah pokemon yeah no i i missed i missed pokemon therefore it wasn't that it was that i was it i felt like it was like it was like today in fortnite i just i'm just too old to understand it do you know i mean that was what it was when i was at school you understand fortnite we played lots of pubg to understand it i didn't get it the latest craze in the in the latest genre right the new call of duty is coming out and it's got a Battle Royale mode in it. There's always something that you don't get. Grapple lines and stuff, it's faster.

You don't get Fortnite. I don't really get memes, honestly. I don't get Twitch chat. I don't get... I'm a bit beyond it all. You're younger than me. I get most of that. I'm pretty hip with the kids.

I know all the memes. don't know i know the kind of stuff that they're saying the sentence hip with the kids yeah by definition not that's it is this a you know i know like you know ellie ellie jiggle and fucking i know i know all about your feels bad man i know that one i know what all i know what all those guys are talking about. I don't feel left out at all. I'm not left out when you guys say ruffle. I know ruffles. Back in my day, we had the doot-doot skeleton. We were happy.

We had a dancing baby. We liked that guy. Whatever happened to him? In simpler times, when we had Goatsy. Now it's all... That was our meme was 9-11 and Goatsy. Now it's all... That was our meme was 9-11 and Goatsy. Yeah. No, it's a craze like any other though, right?

Was it Steel Beams? We don't know. That boy can't melt Steel Beams. I wonder what the next big thing is going to be though. I wonder what the next big genre is going to be. It feels like Battle Royale was... I wonder what the next big thing is going to be, though. I wonder what the next big genre is going to be. It feels like Battle Royale was pretty cool. Remember when we were playing PUBG when we started playing?

It was really fun. We were enjoying it. Yeah, it was fun and new. We were excited. It was fresh. We were excited about it. We didn't know what we were doing, so it made it even more terrifying. Before that, what was the big genre craze? It would have had to have been um

building games it was daisy for a long time though you remember that it was those kind of crafting building yeah but also um like dota league of legends games were were pretty popular too right those yes those were like the big genre craze that was the big genre league into things. Yeah, that was a huge thing. There were a million made. I remember going around, I think it was at Dreamhack Winter, a good few years ago now,

and all the games coming out that they were showing off were MOBAs, like every single one was some shitty MOBA that was clearly going to die on its ass. Like there was Strife and then Smite and League and dota and was that one that paragon or something yeah there were loads i haven't heard from that one for a while yeah i know there's there's tons of different mobile if it's like a hill thing right if it's like a series of hills it must have been like mmos with this big craze weren't they when everyone was doing those Warhammer Online Conan the original Conan Lord of the Rings Online

Lord of the Rings Online yeah there's Dark Age of Camelot yeah there were loads and then after that it was the MOBA sort of hill and that's sort of

gone down a bit and recently it's been this I guess the start of that hill was the DayZ and stuff like this you know those Battle Royale type games yeah that survival

sort of evolved into PUBG kill people take their gear get stronger work your your way to i mean i i feel like fort like we're only a year into that cycle we need to do another two years of that before that oh battle royale is not done yet that's no no no definitely you wait but i also think that like what we'll see is we'll see the tail end of that evolving to something else partly because like i think it's because we've always had FPS games bubbling away in the background, right? There's always been a Capstrike and a T-Force 2.

Doom and Wolfenstein and stuff. There's always been these games that have never really become the number one genre, right? But now it is sort of that. I don't know. It did pretty good, though. It did, but it was never Fortnite big, I don't think um i don't know it did pretty good though it did but it was never fortnight big i don't think i don't think anyone i mean things like competitive scene and stuff for counter-strike is still pretty huge though isn't it no no no right but compare it to fortnight

like look at the number of people that play right like in order for a game to be like completely dominant obviously fortnight is an exception yeah i mean it is so big i think it is clever because of the graphics and the accessibility uh of it for like a younger audience as well counter-strike the era is a game that looks like you wouldn't let your seven-year-old play but um you know because fortnite is cartoony and stuff. Like my son has friends at school. He's six years old who have Fortnite t-shirts and backpacks. I know, Sips. It's terrifying.

But it's kind of like the new Minecraft, isn't it? It is. I've said this like a year ago. He said it a year ago, Sips. He said it a year ago on this podcast. Where have you been? Someone find that. I remember it.

Everybody remembers that. It was a seminal moment in this podcast history. It was. It's the new Minecraft. He literally said that. He said that. I remember saying it. I said to my wife, I said, listen, Charlene.

So hang on a second. You predicted a trend. You put down that meme. You're holding on there. And you didn't do anything about it. What the hell? I've seen the future. And the future is Fortnite.

None of this Minecraft any longer. All the kids, they're moving over. We gotta move, Charlene. We gotta move with the times. Go back to your Whitland. I ain't interested in no Fortnite. It's weird, though, isn't it? It's kind of like,

it comes in twos, though, because the game Minecraft itself was huge, obviously. And it made a lot of people very big on YouTube. But if you look at people who were big in Minecraft around the time that Yogscast was super big in Minecraft, for example, a lot of those guys have just dropped off almost completely, right? Like, their views are no longer, like like up in the millions and stuff like that. Some of them have just moved away from Minecraft altogether and they do other things or they've just completely disappeared sort of thing.

Like the personality ties in with like the trending game as well big time, right? Like it's... Yeah, it's all very aggressive. People will just sort of like slope off and drop off after a while too and i guess the same will probably happen with fortnite too like you'll have a couple of really dominant personalities who will probably just carry through um like the entire trend sort of thing but you'll have people who will rise up and drop off like throughout too which is which is interesting i guess if you look at it it's like interesting

to see if you think about tv shows that were big yeah i guess it's a bit like that people watch the show the series runs its course and that's the end and then you know some of those people go on to do other things and some of them are only ever known for you know being uh that one that one person in that one thing yeah that's true yeah like joey from friends right i mean joey's attempted other things joey yeah yeah i mean episodes did you watch episodes that was good that was a good show that had stephen mangan and uh joey from friends in and the tams in greek it was it was really funny it's about this english couple these two english writers and they go to la to write a series for for joey basically right and it's like they're trying to write a good show

and it's being destroyed by the committee system that they have in Hollywood. And, you know, we want to have this in and we want to have that in and the numbers say this, that, and the other. So they have to sort of work around it. And it's all like how these two English writers go to this Hollywood scene with this big star.

And it's well worth the watch. Episodes, I think it was called. It was very worth the watch. Episodes, I think it was called. It was very, very good. Episodes, okay. Yeah. There's, oh my God, there's some really interesting channels on YouTube that are still doing Minecraft

and still getting millions of views. I think, if anything, there's still these communities that just stick around. And I think Minecraft might come back. I think... My kids still play it think my kids still play it it's it's if the right personality plays it and and almost trends it you know what i mean like like kids at school and stuff will sort of all follow each other if one thing becomes

popular again or whatever and you know they'll all sort of jump onto that bandwagon and watch it like fortnight feels like that right now right it just exploded out of nowhere too like you know the original the pve fortnight that came out was okay which is like really lackluster though it didn't feel like it was gonna going anywhere sort of thing and then when they announced the battle royale mode and stuff uh it came out and it was it was fairly popular right it was fairly popular but then all of a sudden it just seemed like overnight it just exploded it really did yeah okay some of these streamers just became gigantic literally overnight it's yeah it's true yeah so on monday we were playing me doubtless of really we're playing me and Dallas were playing Warcraft 3 and we loaded up some custom games

and we played Gem TD Element TD and one of the other these are still in these are still in Starcraft 2 and Warcraft 3

were great weren't they I think one day tower defenses that'll be what all kids are playing right

it's gotta be you gotta have their time there's fucking plenty of them though there's plenty of tower defense games there's lots of pc games they've had their opportunity and it's been mobile games that are tower defenses it's a genre that's been around for a long time and it's never like gotten mega mega big it's never gone to the mainstream no it's time to shine i don't think

it's ever going to shine though i think come on it's one of those games it's one of those genres that's just going to be like a background lurker genre right it's going to you know what i think the next thing's going to be you know what i think the next thing's going to be they've tried this before so they call it like an arg right like an augmented reality game so you're out in the real world but it's also kind of a game and there have been a few where you have to go around and other people are playing it and you shoot them and it shows up on your phone, you got them or whatever. But if you think about a Battle Royale game and you think about Pokemon Go,

think about the fact that in Pokemon Go, people are outside collecting Pokemons. If you could have some kind of game that combined the being outside collecting things of Pokemon Go with the Battle Royale-style gameplay of Fortnite, you could have an actual people-walking-around-outdoors Battle Royale-Fortnite-Pokemon-crossover game. Wow, yeah.

And I call it... We should edit this to insert a clever name. Pokey. Don't just leave that as it is. Wait. Porkknight. Leave it in silence. I don't even know how you would...

Porkknight. That's what I call it. It's like Porkknight. Porkknight. it in silence. I don't even know how you would. Pork night. That's what I call it. It's like pork night. Pork night. Pork night. You tie it with stars. This has legs. Tell me more.

We need some more details. You have to collect pork. Okay. It's at night time. I'm in. I'm out of ideas. Here's a million dollars. Turn it into five. Oh, my God. How can I invest? I'm in. I'm out of ideas. Here's a million dollars.

Turn it into five. Oh, my God. How can I invest? How can I get in on the ground floor of this and invest? Let me tell you something. I can make some returns. This is so early. We're in the basement. We haven't built the ground floor yet,

but you can be part of the ground floor building team with a small investment. You're at the bottom of it now. I'm in that hole. It's a muddy sheet. Help me get out of this hole. Nice. That's nice. You're at the bottom of it now. You dug a shitty hole. I'm in that hole. It's a muddy shitty hole. Help me get out of this hole. Nice. That's nice.

You know what? You know what I always thought? I always thought that, like, Blizzard, okay, if anyone at Blizzard is listening to this, okay, for the love of God, just make a Warcraft Stardew Valley. Because, honestly, World of Warcraft has kind of become Stardew Valley, right? It's like it's become the biggest collect-em-all of all time, right? Lewis has had many rants about this in the past, about collecting his achievements and gear and stuff and feeling bad because he's missed out on being able to collect these mounts and gear. and gear in it if they made like a if you were like an an orc and you had to like build up a farm and do farming and stuff and all of like the main characters would come by and visit and say that you know jane is having a birthday party on tuesday can you bring a present for and stuff

holy shit that would sell millions like imagine all of like the drooling frothing warcraft fan fan base like they would lap that up right like they could the ultimate care bear wow yeah they could build up their own little like a house and a farm and stuff and they could like hire people to go on adventures for them and bring back epic items they could man they could they could tie everything into a game like that where you just have to go off and collect everything and have a trophy room and stuff like that i mean i would definitely play the fuck out of that one and i'm sure a lot of other people would too so i like again like i said blizzard if you're listening you can have that one for free just make it called warcraft i think if i worked for

blizzard the first thing i would do is such a weird fucking thing i would like start making spreadsheets and be like, okay, how are these fucking, how do you get all of this, collect all this stuff? And why can't you collect this stuff? Anything that you can't collect, it should be doable. I'd figure out which quests are broken, get them fixed. I'd just be the polish guy, right?

I'd go in there and I'd polish up that game unbelievably. I'd make it so everything was doable, everything was attainable, everything was collectible, and it was clear how to get it. And I'd release that spreadsheet publicly as well. I'd be like, here, look, here's a spreadsheet showing you what you need to do,

how you need to do it to get everything. I'd be that guy. I'd be on the Reddit. That sounds exciting. Yeah. I know, it's such a nerdy thing right a bizarre it's weird that that's suddenly my dream job

I would love to do that knocking at your door all of a sudden oh my god he's so dreamy oh my god so we were talking about World of Warcraft because every day there's a post on reddit about the new expansion, right?

And I don't know whether this is because, as we've spoken about before multiple times, World of Warcraft is this kind of living game where people expect so much from it, right? Everyone's like, I love the leveling experience, I love getting to the new thing, I love all the stuff, but as soon as I got there,

everything was locked behind a rep grind, all the new allied races are locked behind incredible tedious things you have to go back to the previous expansion and grind Exalted which takes you weeks on the old content

to get this fucking extra horns on your tauren it's like everything takes way too fucking long and because it's because there's no sort of ways to speed this up you know and it's not

obviously part of it is that the game isn't isn't pay to win so you know you have to pay your sub every month but but the thing is like i want to play this game and i still haven't played because i haven't had time but i've just unsubbed from world of warcraft because because because i did oh my god but i also when i did it i realized oh shit i'm not going to be able to complete the leveling experience of a game that i paid for now because i haven't because i'm

not willing to keep paying 12 pound a month because i just it's frustrating it's an old strange thing that i don't know why we are so happy to put up with it when you say we i haven't played it in a long time no i know you haven't the last time i played it was with you lewis do you remember no we played it i think i came down to it must have been when I was down in Bristol, and you wanted me to play it, and you were astounded at how bad my gear was, and I hadn't seen any of the new area. And we went around some old instances,

and you were so powerful, you could just kill everything. And we were trying to get stuff, and you were trying to get me back into it. And you were like, you should play WoW. It's great. You should play it. Me and Sips play it, and Duncan plays it, and everybody plays it. We me back into it and you were like you should play wow it's great you should play it me and sips play it and duncan plays and everybody plays it we should play it i was like eh and you were kind of disappointed well it is one of these games of of of love and

hate and and and i wonder whether we're getting that with destiny 2 so destiny 2 forsaken just came out me and sips uh originally we had a sponsored deal because i'd never played it so i was like oh you know it'll be good we played it randomly on stream one time because terps was playing it and he liked it and he was like yeah we we were burnt out with hearthstone so he was like why don't we play destiny 2 and i bought it when it came out for pc thinking i mean i want to try this out and do you want to do a brand deal on this in the future? If so, you should probably figure out whether you want to actually play the game or not. I didn't realize that that was the... Well, no, that's what Terps said to me sort of on the side.

Oh, right. So I was like, I'll play it. But unfortunately, it got its hooks into me somehow. And games haven't managed to get its hooks into me since, I think, XCOM 2, which incidentally there is a new expansion planned for, by the way, I heard. Is there actually? Oh, wow, God. Yeah.

That's great. Planned, so it's not imminent. So, wait, hang on. There's going to be another expansion for XCOM 2? Yeah. Because you'd expect the next game to be coming out pretty soon because there was all that foreshadowing at the end of XCOM 2, right?

Well, I would have thought it would be a new game entirely from the deep one sort of thing oh please no i i personally well i've heard i heard a lot of this there's definitely something coming and it's either going to be a new game well i think the guy i think the the the lead guy on x-com 2 is like a an old school diehard x-com fan and yeah we've met him and i think i read He's a fucking super nice guy. I think that he played them all to death, basically. Some of them he liked, some of them he didn't like so much, sort of thing. But I think he...

I remember him saying at some point that he really liked the idea of like... Was it Terrorist from the Deep? Terror from the Deep. He liked the idea of it was terrible it wasn't underwater stuff it wasn't like an executed well and i feel like terrible it was executed terribly yeah i feel like it is a good idea and i think if it was done you know as well as like x-com 2 was for example it

could be fantastic and maybe i think they need to not look at any of the old games at all you know if they're going to make an underwater XCOM, it needs to be done from the ground up with modern XCOM in mind. Because XCOM 2 is so much different to XCOM 1, which is so much different to the original, but better. Better and better. I mean, they've proven that they can do it with XCOM 2, because it's phenomenal.

So, like, I have a lot of hope that if they did try to redo it or, you know, try to do something similar to it, it would be equally great. Yeah, absolutely. Anyway, I'm sure, look, it's such a successful game. It's so good. War of the Chosen came out, what, 2017? Like a year ago?

Yeah, it was great too. Over a year ago now? It was fantastic. So, I mean, War of the Chosen was a great expansion. It was, yeah. I'm surprised we haven't had any announcements in the last year about what's next but that means it must be

fully under development because there hasn't been any DLC in between in the past year remember the first year it came out you had all of the cosmetic stuff there was a couple of campaigns like Shen's Gift and all that kind of crap so at this point

I think it's got to be either a standalone kind of expansion or something new because I think that I don't really want to load up XCOM 2 and do another campaign. I'm actually,

we're about to start that. No. Let's start it again because it's so much fun to stream. It is really fun to stream. Try not to lose your fucking shit

because Sips gets so salty when he loses a guy but actually, that's part of the fun. Well, it is and it isn't. The circumstances in which you lose them really sort of dictates part of the fun. Expect to lose guys because it's fine and it's part of it. You know what? I have played the game.

Don't just quit as soon as you lose your best guy. I have finished the game multiple times. I'm a veteran of losing lads. It's fantastic though. It is really good. I always name them after people in Twitch chat. Sometimes when one thing goes wrong, you're like, I'm done. So no, if it's like really stupid, or it's some mechanic that doesn't really explain itself all that well.

Oh, yeah, like something that gives you an extra action point, but then you use that. What the fuck do you mean I can't do X? So like, oh, and then then you lose a key guy. I'm like, fuck it, I'm done. I will quit it if I'm frustrated. If you misunderstand the controls, that's fair enough. Anyway, back to where we were.

But just quickly, I played Jagged Alliance Rage yesterday. This is the new one? On today I played, which is the new one. It's coming out in three weeks, and it is garbage. Hot garbage, I'm pretty sure. You know what's frustrating to me is uh i love those games i love those turn-based um strategy i love them 100 i'm delighted there's more and they're the reason there's so many more is because the very fact that x-com and war of the chosen is so so did so well made so much money there's

loads of coming out but a lot of them are just cash in cash grabby shit yeah ben was telling me about playing um the the mario one mario one with his kid um and he fucking they both had a wonderful time like ben would say what should i do now and then they'd play what mario versus rabbits it's called oh yeah yeah playing that together um and it's it's great way to introduce people to the genre as well like these things aren't competition but anyway it's a shame that some of them are a bit just bad. I don't know what it is with Jagged Alliance games. There has not been a good one since Jagged Alliance 2. They've made like four.

I was looking. There's loads. If you look on Steam, there are a bunch. They are all terrible. It's like they've got VIP. But there were a bunch of terrible XCOM games between XCOM and xcom had um but like it flipped around didn't it like um it it they the the first like couple games were

amazing and they did really well and then the genre started dropping off a bit it was less popular and then i think the original studio went under sold the rights to it and then another publisher picked up the rights to it and so it was just it just became like a hot potato right it was this this ip that was like fairly established but none of the studios that touched it could do it any justice sort of thing and then it just drove it into the ground until it was so i think i think in the end i think 2k bought it for like nothing and then decided to probably decided to do something with it sort of thing you know but but some people sell their licenses for fucking pretty low value

anyway because apparently like you know warhammer every i mean how many fucking warhammer games are there so many a turn-based strategy game of warhammer called mechanicus i played that at gdc and gamescom but this really nice guys all sanctioned under Games Workshop though, right? They have like a ton of creative control over all of the stuff. Yeah, they actually weirdly do. You have to report back to them quite often even if you end up not using very much

of their stuff just so they can make sure it doesn't sort of... You know what this reminds me of? The original Blood Bowl game made by what are they called? Cyanide. So it came out a good few years ago now. And this is the original Blood Bowl computer game.

So this is like six, seven years old, maybe even older than that. It was terrible. It was absolutely terrible. But it was the only nice-looking computer version of Blood Bowl. There was a thing called Fumble which was like a um a java client with like the the weirdest community but it was it was like really really small but all the good players played that oh there's the door fuck this is the second time i love his doorbell too it sounds so grand doesn't it it's like he lives in like a fucking mansion yeah yeah i know i don't even

have a doorbell at my house it's just we're old school just knocking you know what else i don't have in my house lewis you ready for this you ready you sit down a microwave i do not own a microwave and what i'm happy you know what that's the own. I'm proud to say I've never owned, in my adult life, I have never owned a microwave. I've never owned a microwave. The fuck? Yeah, I hate myself so much. And I want to make my life so complicated for myself

that I've never owned a microwave. That was Games Workshop. And they said, I'm not licensed to talk about Blood Bowl. Holy shit. Fucking Games Workshop are bigger than I thought, though. I'm not licensed to talk about Blood Bowl holy shit fucking games workshop are bigger than I thought though how do you eat all those fucking like hot dogs

I knew they were a big company but I didn't realize they were as big as they are and their share price is like it's like three grand or something like that their share price is nuts anyway can I just say about the original Blood Bowl game when when cyanide made it it was to fulfill some kind of contract that they had agreed to make a blood bowl game right so they made this shitty blood bowl game to just sort of get it out of the way and it was surprisingly popular even though it was dreadful because

there was nothing else there's really nothing like it like people are thirsty for turn-based strategy games and there's just not many of them so they made this game and then it was on it was way more popular than they thought it would be so they were like oh shit i guess we better make a good one so then they made a second one that was like not shit um even even though the rules of blood bowl are still shit so it's still a frustrating wanky was the original sort of fumble was that more authentic along the lines of the extremely authentic had all the races um but it was just a fan project it was free it was just a free free sort of online java client that you could just play um you know it wasn't ever intended to be for the mass market so so back in the day i used to play magic the gathering on a program

called cockatrice right right, right. Yeah, yeah. And it was like this open source shit. Basically, it was just a table that was made. Exactly. And it didn't have any of the rules, right? So you had to play a card and then use arrows and stuff and click it to explain to the opponent what it had done. So you'd poke his side of the thing and you'd be like,

this thing is like, you need to discard a card. Or I'd double tap on the card and you'd be like, so you'd like poke his side of the thing and you'd be like, this thing is like, you need to discard a card. Or I'd like double tap on the card and make them to like, have to tell them to read it again, you

know. But it was very much like, like kind of faith based thing. It was very different. It was more like tabletop simulator for Magic the Gathering,

but very quick and easy to use. Very simple infrastructure, simple UI, completely legal, obviously. And I don't recommend you see if you can find that and if it's still Very simple infrastructure, simple UI. Completely legal, obviously. And I don't recommend you see if you can find that and if it's still going.

It probably isn't. It's probably been shut down. No, it probably is because the guys that run it are probably like, this is the only good version. None of the other versions are any good. But it is interesting that you can sort of... But sometimes you just wanted to...

Certain games, like with Magic, I just wanted to give a deck a try before I invested the money in it or something like this, you know? Because I wanted to get a feel for it. I didn't want to have to get all the cards, collect the cards, put everything together, give it a go, and then I finally find that I hated it. It's not so bad.

I mean, that does happen to me in Hearthstone. Like, I'll disenchant everything to make a fucking druid deck, and I'll it once i'll be like oh this this is not as cool as i thought it was or you know someone beats me with a deck have you been playing on the topic of hearthstone have you been playing it recently uh no well i got legend to die and so i've quit again yeah i don't think i've even logged in for the last two months since i did it but that's partly because i've been trying new games out so but also it's partly because destiny's got its hooks in me like nothing like going back to this but it's weird like to have i i think i'm gonna have this you might like this burnout period flex you might like it i think i'm just gonna cold turkey it once it's done um and and i think that'll be enough do

you know what i mean the um but the gameplay is phenomenal it It's really satisfying when you shoot stuff. It's a satisfying FPS. The world looks great. It's really pretty. It's very smooth. It's not too many people. It doesn't nag you with microtransactions or anything. I haven't spent an extra cent in it, and I don't feel like I need to.

It's actually okay. Yeah, you probably would like it, Flex. I've been playing a lot of shooters like me. Lads, I'm a Dota main, all right? I know, you're a Dota main. That's got its hooks in you. Oh, it always has, yeah. You're automatically, I think you automatically

just reach for that Dota button, don't you? It's like whenever I load up a Chrome window, my fingers automatically start typing in reddit dot com and then i auto fill r slash yogscast and then i look through that and see what the news is and it's like that's my like muscle memory do you guys have this muscle memory on your like computer where you sit down and something you just yeah something loads them automatically porn hub yeah muscle memory i log into my computer and instantly open a Chrome incognito browser and I start typing in porn.

You know what I found out? Incognito doesn't hide anything from the website you're going to. No, it just hides it from other people who are using a browser on your computer. That would make it the least incognito thing ever. When your friends come over for a couple of beers, they can't see that you've been looking up like, you know, five guys blowing each other porn.

On Anna, hot action. Yeah. May takes her parka off or whatever. I don't know. Yeah. It's just for your search history and stuff. Is that hot to you? She takes off her parka. I don't know. Yeah. To play Overwatch. It's just for your search history and stuff. Is that hot to you?

She takes off her parka. Woo! I don't fucking know. She was very hot before. Oh, my God. So, listen, what you were saying about Blood Bowl is, because we went to Disneylandneyland and i've been reading like stuff just off and on about you know like disney and and pixar and stuff too and the like the the story of pixar is kind of interesting it's a bit like you said with with blood bowl originally they

you know they started off and they made they made toy story as part of like a three movie deal with disney disney were disney were going to publish three pixar movies and and own all the rights to the characters and everything as a result and pixar at the time were like yeah great you know this is disney they're huge um you know this will be like great for us so they signed up to this like three movie deal and they made toy story first and um like you were saying about blood bowl as well they didn't think it was going to be a huge thing. You know, they were happy with what they made. But they, you know, they were a little bit like, you know, how is this going to be received?

Like, we don't really know. And then the sort of like initial reviews of the movie started coming in. And people were saying, like, this is going to be fucking huge. Like, it's going to be nuts. So they were like really confident and stuff. And then, of course, it came out and made made millions sort of thing and they were pretty happy um so then they started working on toy story 2 um almost like immediately they started working on they had some ideas for it and stuff uh but at the time disney's sort of um policy for sequels was

straight to video so so toy story 2 they started working on it with the idea that it was just going to be a straight to video sequel like like not even you know no theatrical release nothing like it was just going to go you know straight to dvd or whatever toy story 2 and then part of the way through it they realized that like oh hang on this is going to be much bigger and and should be out in theaters can you imagine if toy story 2 went straight to video that would have been crazy right it's been nuts and then they started that's when they started fighting because it was like well this was meant to be straight for video so this doesn't actually count as one of like the three movies or whatever and then pixar was like oh fuck yeah we're getting screwed here and stuff and then they finally finished like the

three videos in the deal uh the three movies in the deal and then they were like they couldn't come to an agreement again they didn't want to work with disney anymore and then disney was like oh fine we'll just buy you and that was it that's disney's way out yeah disney's solution to everything is just yeah well we're just gonna eat you up like galactus or whatever or what was that transformer that eats everything the world but then buying pixar meant that steve jobs became the uh biggest shareholder in disney he owned seven percent of disney stock at the time which was worth like fucking 50 billion or something stupid like that it was insane so i watched this documentary on netflix last night called forks over knives right which is all about how you just shouldn't eat meat or

animal protein because it kills you. Go on. I was chatting this morning to Dave in the office and he was like, that's what Steve Jobs did. He basically decided he wasn't going to have cancer therapy for his

treatable cancer. He was going to just on like a vegan diet right and i was like is that true because i but i don't know is that is that like a thing that happened it wouldn't surprise me if he did that i don't know if he actually did do it but he was very like um he was he he was he was kind of like a product of like 60s and the 70s, right? Yeah, very much. He was not afraid to use LSD and stuff. He went on these spiritual pilgrimages to India and stuff. In a sweat lodge.

Yeah, well, no, but I think he was like... Like in Earth to Development. He was just like a bit of a hippie, I guess. He was just like a bit of a hippie, I guess. Gavin Belson from Silicon Valley, if you've seen that show. Yes, it's a great show. I think he is very much based on Steve Jobs. Right. Because he was an arsehole.

From all accounts you can read about him, he was an arsehole. And he was certainly very unpleasant to um his daughter and stuff like that um who he denied yeah that's right yeah he did at first yeah he but i think they grew close like later in life but i don't i don't believe they ever really did it was pretty awkward yeah yeah i mean yeah so it was stuff like that i don't think he was a particularly nice guy but i think a lot of these people that are extremely successful and driven generally aren't honestly. So yeah,

it was, it was weird. It was one of those things where you think, so if Gavin Belson is based on him and Gavin Belson is always doing this stuff where he's like, he's into Tibetan meditation and all this kind of stuff. And I, I'm always curious when someone is already hugely

successful but still decides i'm gonna do all this weird shit as well i think i'd be even less inclined to get into that shit i think if i was like super successful and i had millions i would just be like the ultimate like yeah you think i farted in these underpants i'm gonna need clean ones and stuff like i wouldn't I wouldn't be like going down spiritual attunement stuff or anything like that. I must be doing something right or else why would I be so successful?

I'd just be poor in all the goddamn time. I would act like a mafia boss without the organized crime element. I would act like that guy. I'd just be like, all the time, just with a lot of money. I'd go into places and I'd just buy them, just buy all the places that I like to go and stuff and whatever, you know. Would you like to be a mafia boss?

crossed or something like that and i and i'm not sure that i would like to run a criminal empire but i would like the i would like the the freedom of having a ton of money and somebody drive me around to all the places that i want to go to and you know everybody just do what i say all the time and couldn't you just be kind of like being like well yeah i guess so i mean but i'm too lazy to be rich or or do anything that involves not playing video games all day so i don't know if i'll ever get there you know you want to be the godfather i don't know if i want to be the godfather i want to be more like i've been watching i've been watching the deuce have you guys seen that the deuce no okay it's that oh fuck it's awesome it's by the guy wait how is it spelled the deuce the d-e-u-c-e it's it's it's it's west 42nd street new york city 1971 they used to call it uh 40 deuce i think and that's why the area became known as the deuce it's

like around times square before they cleaned up manhattan so it's it's it's by the guy who did The Wire, David Sondland. Right, yeah. And it takes place in 71, and it's all about the adult entertainment industry. This is before, this is like the start of pornography, basically, as we now know it. Sondland's up. Say no more.

And, of course, it was influenced and of course it was it was it was influenced and controlled by the the mob back then and probably still is was it and it's really good it's a really good series on HBO the first season was out last year I think and the second season just started on Sunday we just watched the first episode last night at the

second season and it's great it's really really good it's really good one I'm excited anyway there's a big mafia boss guy he's like just he's like a maid guy he's not like the the main guy his name is uh is rudy pepsi cola or something i can't remember his last name anyway and he's just like you know he's a wise guy he just like turns up in his car and he's got his guy with him. And they're always scheming and hustling and doing stuff. You know, they always have like, they always seem to have like an abandoned retail lot that they can just turn into like a massage parlor or something when they want to. And, you know, they've got a couple of guys that they trust to do all this stuff.

trust to do all this stuff and it it i would want to be that guy but i wouldn't want like uh you know all the violence and and backstabbing and treachery and you know all the degenerates and stuff like that you know what i mean i would just want to roll up somewhere with money and say hey open up a massage parlor here and somebody be like yeah okay and then just go on to the next thing sort of thing you know what i mean that's? That's the mafia guy I want to be. All right. What about you guys? Basically, you just want to be a legit businessman. Yeah, pretty much.

Running slightly seedy industries. I want to be a legit businessman, but I want to dress like a pimp and I want to strut around New York City while I do it as well. Secretly kind of be a little bit shady on the, just have that low level of anxiety about one day you might get in prison for the rest of your life i think just legit but but you know streetwise legit i want to you know i want to have a gun yourself or do you have like a guy i would never

use it yeah i would carry it around just so that like every once in a while it'd be like a ceremonial gun you know like if i wanted to buy a bar that i walked into and they were like no it's not for sale i could just pull it out and be like really just put it put it down the bar that's it and it's like this gold etched bar yeah so what would be etched on it like what would be written on it oh like a name or a theme right the ace of spades no i'm charlene i would call it charlene and i'd have the name engraved on it and i would have a little heart like a consultant charlene i'd pull my gun out and be like whoa what's that oh it's my gun just like intimidate people yeah but there's a lot of uh there's a lot of uh there's a lot of wire guys uh in it like uh d'angelo barksdale plays a

cop in it uh lester is in it a little bit he's he's in it very briefly uh frank sabatka from uh season two is in it a lot uh there's a whole bunch of uh old wire illuminati in it that sounds man you gotta fucking have some respect for hbo for for making these shows. The HBO, just the shows are so good. Westworld Season 2, I've been struggling through a little bit. I told you about it, but I'm still wrestling my way through it slowly. I still haven't watched the last episode of Season 2, but I liked it. I like the idea of Westworld. Yeah, I know what you mean.

Westworld is a little bit like one of these games for me which is like where I just for some reason got a little bit bored and then forgot to finish it show me it's like it's just not helped my attention that much that I'm excited it doesn't remind me to come back you know I saw season one

I don't really need to see season two season one was good season two furthers it and is good. Season two is definitely worth watching. It's definitely more creative than you think because sometimes you worry that these shows, right, are going to just drag things out. No, there's a lot of twists in season two

that open up the story more. They're just up for making more parks and more stuff and more world building. It's like a relief, really, in a sense, that you see more of the world. Because they could easily just drag it out for another sort of eight episodes of do nothing, which some of these shows do. Nothing fucking changes.

The show's scared to change because they think, oh, everyone will hate it if it's not exactly the same as it used to be. I don't know. I think Westworld was pretty good. I've been watching Better Call Saul as well. Yeah, I've been trickling that out. It's coming out a week isn't it yeah it does yeah and i like it i fucking love better call so i love the pacing of it i like how i like it but i also struggle with it like i like it's so fucking depressing like there's no upside he never fucking gets and even where you know he ends up he ends up in a fucking like when the show starts with this guy

ends up working in a fucking cinnabon shitty cinnabon right and having a heart attack or whatever it's like that's how the show fucking starts you know like his whole life is just gonna be shit so the hell ever like where are the fucking upsides we watched breaking bad well the upsides were making a terrible fucking ton money, like on the edge of a knife for years, like working for a drug cartel. That was the upside. That's... I think Saul is like you.

If you were a sneaky businessman, you'd be smart, but you'd fucking have a bad time of it. You'd try and make a little bit of money on the edge, but it would come back to fucking bite you in the ass. And you'd be Saul with the fucking fake stuff. It's the moral of the story of the crime doesn't pay. It's a really simple one.

Dunkin' Donuts in like 2037. That's going to be you, Sip. Run the run from your family. Crime doesn't pay. That's the moral of the story here. Your son's going to become like a pimp and come hunt you down. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah, and Method Man is in.

Method Man is a pimp in The Deuce as well, and he's really good. I love Method Man. Yeah, yeah, and Slim Charles is in it too. Fuck, it's really good. You guys have to watch the deuce. It's really good. There's a lot of awkward sex in it, though. I forgot that you loved rap.

I always forget that you're massively into American sort of 90s gangster rap. Oh, yeah. I think Flax is kind of too, aren't you, Flax? Yeah, in a big way. You've got a soft spot for all that, don't you? It was a big thing for me when I was a young man. Yeah, it was. It's so interesting.

Because for me, that was never, ever, ever a thing. It was always metal when I was a teenager. Flax, you would have moved back to England by that point, right? I had, yeah. And I think that's what made it more exciting. I remember very distinctly, do you remember when you were a kid and there were just kids in your neighborhood that you'd go out in the evening to look for something to do and people to play with or hang out with? And there were always some kids you didn't really know where they lived. You were never going to go to their house.

They were just kids you knew. Some of them you didn't even know their name. you were too shy to say hey what's your name so you'd just be like hey what's up you want to go for a bike ride yeah cool you just cycle around the car park or whatever yeah it was just like people you hung out with that you kind of vaguely knew yeah and uh this one kid one time he was he was big into rap but the reason he was into it is because he couldn't believe that they were swearing so he had he was like listen to this and he put the headphones on and it was like some nwa like they were they said motherfucker and they said shit and they said fuck and it was like wow this is exciting and new because they're swearing in a song yeah it was like unheard of at that point

it was funny but but lots of swearing too. It wasn't just like the occasional. Oh, it was a lot of swearing. It was like every goddamn verse of the song had swearing in it. Yeah. The first rap that I really listened to, I guess, must have been Eminem. Do you know what I mean? Really?

I think that was for me. Yeah. I thought most people was like Snoop Dogg, right? Snoop Dogg was like the big, big, more so than anyone else, like, like almost like kind of mainstream, right? Like there was like the, the what's my name video and everything. And that was like, I think they had a radio friendly version that was like in heavy circulation at the time and stuff as well.

It definitely felt to me like he was one of the first rappers that crossed over from, this is a scary thing that we shouldn't allow our kids to see to actually, you know, I mean, he was he was seen as kind of. Yeah, it was sort of like the counterculture and like and Snoop Dogg was as well, obviously, but it was still radio ish. I mean, yeah, it did sort of appeal to like the mainstream as well. It was more, I guess, accessible somehow. I think it was because it didn't seem so angry. You know what I mean? What a rap at that time.

What a gangsta rap. It was extremely angry. I'm going to kill you. Yeah, Snoop was just a bit more smooth with it all, wasn't he? Yeah, he felt more like it was fun. It didn't seem so aggressive. It changed into more of a hip-hop, chill vibe. Definitely.

It wasn't as angry. I'm not saying that he was the first, but I think he was the one that made it more popular in the mainstream. West Coast hip-hop had a bit more of a party atmosphere about it. East Coast hip-hop was really serious and gritty, and New York was a much different place in the 80s and like the early 90s and stuff it was yeah yeah whereas like west coast hip-hop had more of like a barbecue party feel to it sometimes no no you're right if you look at the videos they all seem to be having a

great time yeah they're always barbecuing they're always like yeah they're not like all dressed up in coats and like freezing their butts off just going if you come onto this corner i will fucking kill you like that's the gist of the if it's not too cold i'm good i'm gonna get the gun out if it doesn't freeze up before i'm gonna freeze a bullet to your face i think it's so cold if i shoot a bullet it's just gonna freeze in midair just land on your face and stick there like a penny on a cold day. That's what I'm going to do to you. Whereas in L.A., they were like, hey, let's drink a load of gin and have fun. Yeah, New York is like, it's cold and I'm angry. So I'm going to shoot somebody.

I think, was it in your car that you have like straight out Compton playing? Aren't you thinking of the movie Office Space? I don't have a straight out of compton in my car no what do i have in my car i have a couple of couple of like old cds that somehow managed to survive my move to the uk and also my wife had a couple old cds as well that just managed to find their way into the car so it's like a mix of stuff like when my kids were still too young to understand the words i would drive around listening to like wu-tang and stuff like that and yeah uh odb biggie um snoop and everything else i would drive around listening to that yeah once they can start picking up words from the song yeah you don't want them listening to that yeah now it's more

wholesome dad what does motherfucking shit-eating fuckface mean? Oh, you'll understand when you're older. Don't worry about it. Why is that in your search history? I went incognito. You don't know about that. That must have been your mother. I typed it into Porthub, and it just auto-completed shit-eating Overwatch.

I did my usual. I opened up Chrome and I started typing in Minecraft for the autocomplete. But then a bunch of weird porn came up. Dad, what's going on? What's good? Did you forget to use the incognito? Do you feel like you're always stepping on eggshells around your kids? Or is it quite easy?

Yeah, it's easy. I mean, you occasionally swear if I get really angry. A lot absolutely blasts right over their head. Kids are barely paying attention to anything anyway. So, like, you know, you can, as long as you're not swearing a lot. I thought they were like sponges. They just absorb everything. They are and they aren't sort of thing. They're sponges, but everything goes over their head.

A lot of stuff does go over their head. They're selective sponges, for sure. It's an incredible thing. Also, I mean, my two are old enough now to understand when Daddy says a bad word, that doesn't mean they're allowed to copy it. You know what I mean? And I'm sure at school they all talk about it.

My youngest came home the other day and she said, Amber at school knows the S word. I said, all right, you tell me what you think the S word is. And she's like, is it shit? And I said, yes, that is the S word. Well done. The research is correct on this one. I can confirm that is indeed the S word.

I said, do you know any other words? And she goes, I know the F word. I said, what's that one? She goes, flip. I said, no, flip is not the F word, but you keep using that one because that's a good one to use. Flip sounds a lot better than just screaming flip.

My son asked me the other day, he goes, dad, what does it mean when you point your middle finger at somebody? I was like, well, what do you think it means? He's like, well, my friend at school said, and I said, well, I said, don't point your middle finger. You know what? If you want to joke around and point your middle finger at somebody and they understand that you're just joking, it's probably okay.

But maybe you shouldn't do it anyway. But you should never really just point your middle finger at somebody. And I said, and you know what else? The V sign. Don't do that one either. Some people will find that one offensive as well. So don't do that one either and if you get your hand and you shake it in your wrist in a sort of you know

side to side fashion don't do that they pick up stuff at school he's like he's like dad i want to watch the walking dead and i was like okay well you can't really watch the walking dead like it's not it's not made for for people who are six years old like you have to be no it's traumatic for 18 year olds what is it about just like zombies and stuff i really like zombies i was like yeah i know but there's lots of violence in it's kind of scary songs it's about you know they're not pretty much the end of the world and he was like oh yeah i don't know if i want to watch that one he's still young enough to know that he'd be shit scared of it sort of thing so it's like it's it it's cute.

You know, there were kids when I was at school, there always seemed to be these kids whose parents were like, yeah, you can watch whatever the fuck you like and do whatever you like. It's a free country. It's like, well, he's still a kid. Do you remember V, the original TV show V? No. You don't remember it?

Maybe it was before your time. Maybe. I don't know. What was it about? They remade it recently. It was about these aliens with lizard skin underneath humans did watch this the recent one okay so originally this was around i've never even heard of that and it was huge it was like a television event in its time even though it was

terrible and these aliens arrive and there's some resistance fighters and it was incredibly popular and basically the aliens are lizards underneath and they're wearing human masks. And it's very, you know, very cliche. But at the time, it was a big show. God, you know what? Was it a UK show? No, no, no. It was an American show.

Really? I had never heard of it. Marina Baccarin. Never heard of me. You know Marina? Nope. Marina Baccarin. I must have just missed it.

Possibly the biggest crush on her of all time. I don't remember her. But anyway anyway it was huge and like this was when i was living in the states it was massive and all the other kids would stay up to watch it was on at nine o'clock and my dad was like no your bedtime is eight and i was like but please i was like i'll sleep for an hour wake me up at nine i'll watch v i'll go back to sleep he was like no it's if it's on at nine o'clock it's inappropriate and it's too late all the other kids at school were watching it.

And they were all talking about V. And I was like, tell me everything about it. Because you're my only source of information. They tell me the entire plot. Every episode, they tell me, you know, this character, that character. I knew the show in my head as a seven and eight year old. But they were watching it. And I mean, I've watched it recently. It is kind of violent, I guess.

At the time, it was quite gory, I guess. And kind of a little scary for a seven year old kid. But yeah, I felt kind of violent I guess at the time it was quite gory I guess and kind of uh a little scary for a seven-year-old kid but um oh my fucking god I had this same experience so I had there were tv shows on at BBC2 at like 11 p.m that I couldn't watch my friend would watch them and they would be like I think they were they were called weird things like like sci-fi stuff like like the like there's a like Zex or something like um oh yeah. Oh, God, what's it called? Fucking something. It's Canadian.

It's a Canadian show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like this weird sort of shitty adult-y sci-fi, and he would watch it, and it was about this big spaceship called the Zex or something, and he would tell me all the plots, and I never fucking saw an episode. Do you reckon what would it be that your kids will watch

when they're sort of too young our big one in north america well at least like at my school and with my friends was was saturday night live like like you if somehow you convinced you we were young right like if somehow you convinced your parents to let you stay up until 11 30 at night to watch saturday night live then you had like, you know, the pleasure of turning up to school on Monday morning and just like memeing the shit out of all the skits because you watched it and everybody else be like, no, fuck, I couldn't stop to watch it. But like, when you're like 10 years old and you stay up until 1130 at night just to like see jokes on Saturday Night Live, I used to fall asleep after like 10 minutes

like i'd be so fucking tired like it was just it was always a thing i remember everybody was always trying to like stay up as late as they could on saturday to watch saturday night live and this was like around the time of like chris farley and adam sandler and kind of like i i think those were probably some of the best years of saturday Live, apart from Eddie Murphy years and stuff. Chris Rock was on, David Spade, and Norm Macdonald was on it for a while too. Sort of like a golden age of Saturday Night Live, but it was always fun to stay up. It was definitely called, it was called Lex, by the way. Yes, I remember.

Yeah. So it was this, there was this, I think what I did was when I was good, I'm sure I've told this before, but what I would do is I would pretend that I was recording something, okay, on a VHS, right? And it was on at like, I don't know, eight o'clock, something I was allowed to watch, okay? And then I just leave the tape rolling afterwards and it

would record like everything up until like midnight and then i'd fast forward the next day when my parents were out and i'd watch the stuff that was on at late night right and so one of those things was like lex and i remember like there was this it was i remember there was very gory there was this scene that was like yeah it was like some guy was like like tied to a chair okay and there was this old alien like machine that was was supposed to like inseminate people keep like yeah yeah it was really weird guy like strapped to a chair strapped to this like james bond style with this like manky old moldy injection of semen like coming towards him. Like, oh, it was way too bad for me as like a fucking teenager.

That's what I remember it as. It might not be that at all. It was a German-Canadian-UK production. She was called Eva Haberman. I had a massive crush on her. She was gorgeous. She had like that purple silvery hair. She was like,

she was meant to be something like the X She was fucking gorgeous. Oh my god The other thing I watched was a thing called space above and beyond which yeah one season of shitty sci-fi in 1996 And for some reason I watched like the whole thing and it was just so fucking weird, but it was bad It was bad. Man, I thought I was into sci-fi but you guys have shown me up big time. Like I think,

I used to just watch Star Trek The Next Generation and that was about it. I mean, I was allowed to watch that. Yeah, that was on at like five o'clock, six o'clock. I watched that with my mum, you know. We had a good time watching that. That was great.

Honestly, that was a great show. The first time I saw that was on a trip to the States. had they hadn't started showing in the uk this was back when if a show was in the on in the states it'd be like three or four fucking years before it they bothered to show movies used to be like that too remember movies used to take forever to come out ever but now it's like synchronized releases pretty much yeah and back then you go into a video store i know I know our podcast always descended to either talking about poop or talking about our willies or talking about how things were when we were young. And I know that's typical, but fucking deal with it.

We've got how many episodes of this? This is what it is. If you're still listening, you put up with it for X number of episodes. Yeah. With Y number. At this point, you're probably not even listening to what we're saying. You just like the patterns of our voices, right? It doesn even listening to what we're saying. You just like the patterns of our voices, right? It doesn't really matter what we're saying.

So you go into the video store and there would be videos for new releases would be years before they came out on video. Like the original video stores you'd go in. Let's say there was a movie that came out. It's not going to come out in like three or four months or five months on Blu-ray, DVD and Netflix. Years, years before they trusted it to come out on video because they were convinced it was going to steal all the money that the cinemas were making and it was all going to be video i used to work at blockbuster when i first moved over here and uh i used to i used to speak to my mom you know like once a week or whatever and i used to really be

big into movies i used to watch a lot of movies before i had kids once you have kids you watch less movies for sure i don't know if you noticed that but uh before i had kids i watched tons of movies and uh when i was working at blockbuster i watched tons of movies do you mean in the theater or or on because i watch loads at home i'd go i'd go to like you know opening night stuff at the theater all the time i don't do the movies so much although i saw mission impossible the new mission impossible it was good well and i find now that like in the evenings we just watch like shows like uh you know shows have taken over movies for me for sure but um so i used to speak to my mom every week and and she'd be like oh you fucking this just came out and it's really good and i was like ah shit you know i gotta wait for months for that to come out and then like i'd say

oh you know we just got this out on on on dvd it just came out like we just got it at blockbuster yesterday she's like what that's been out for months here right oh fuck like it's like so frustrating i think that's one thing that's definitely changed yeah yeah yeah like that used to be the case that australia were like two years ahead on home and away they had the region lock on DVD players too. So I'd say to my mom, like, fucking, can you buy it and send it to me? Like, I really want to see it. I don't want to wait four months. And they're like, yeah, but we can't get region two.

We can only get region one over here. Did you not region unlock your DVD player? I did eventually, yeah. But at first, I didn't know how to. I don't even know if I had a DVDvd player that that had like the region lock thing i had a available a wharf dale dvd player that i bought from tesco's specifically because i read on the internet that all you had to do was enter a specific code and it would region unlock it so you just had to go and press a certain combination of buttons on the remote and the screen would sort of nod at you like yes i mean i was not that savvy uh you know like i i was representing your average joe back then i think

yeah with with these geographical international yeah i was all over that stuff thinking about it because we had itv digital and i had the unlocked itv digital which gave you all the channels even even the even the rude ones so well like babe station and stuff well yeah but the this is babe station when it's just showing you trailers later on it shows you actual soft core pornography where you see wow you see actual tits didn't channel five used to have like a bunch of soft core like later in the evening like all the boobs would be behind like a piece of glimmering fabric you know that you you have to you still had to imagine the babe station was more of the early days like this before internet porn was

really viable people still use the tv and magazines because it took half an hour to download a fucking movie so you know you fucking i mean everybody's got a story about their friend who bought a top shelf magazine and then just got scared that their parents would find it and threw it in a ravine somewhere or stashed it under a rock in the woods go find it in the woods

how are we back on woods porn it fucking always comes back to woods porn it was a central moment in my childhood I like that part p flex well done oh very good all right let's uh before we do the usual let's wrap it up everyone just honestly what a jumble of mess and podcasts as we bounce from topic to topic yeah sorry about that i told you we wouldn't be able to top last week's we'll never be able to you know what we're going to talk about next week that's right games and our childhood again and possibly our

dicks and stuff as well childhood and things have changed yeah i don't have any new stories this is a problem i stream like six hours a day all my stories i'm spent i have nothing i don't like you know what i mean i don't have a life outside of all this stuff. Now, all my stories are repeated and old. Like, you know what I should do? I used to do this. I have ideas all week.

I was like, shit, we should talk about that on the podcast. And then I forget it. I should write them down and I'll be like, all right, talking point number four, let's talk about pornography. That's been stashed in the woods and found there.

I don't think we've covered that topic. No, yeah, no, that's a new, that's definitely a new, fresh topic for us. Yeah, but I will think about it. Have to think about it. Bye. there. I don't think we've covered that topic. No, that's definitely a new fresh topic for us.

But I will think about it. Have to think about it. Thanks for listening to our podcast. See you later. Bye.