Triforce! - Triforce! #98: Trip Down Memory Lane

Episode Date: May 1, 2019

Triforce! Episode 98! Pyrion enjoyed TwitchCon in Berlin, Lewis loves the British summer and Sips is taking a trip down memory lane! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the Triforce podcast. We're back. That's right. With Sips. Yeah. Fresh from the Canadian wild wildlands that's my period flax hello who hasn't been away he's not been away to canada that's for sure that's true i ought to know everything about canada i want to know about portage i want to know about poutine i want to know about about people being polite everything beginning with P all of that stuff

the three Ps were sorely missed I can't really eat poutine because of the beef gravy it's too cold for portage Canada's changed a lot in the last 10 years people aren't as polite as they used to be so

we really missed out on all of the peas. All the highlights. Yeah. So first of all, let's just keep going with those. First of all, do you really have to? Is it too cultural touch? I think you should have manned up a bit. Second, surely there must be modern vegan, like vegetarian.

There is. You can get beef gravy without the beef. We found out too late that there was. Too late. So you didn't even. Okay. And then the third thing is, I don't believe it. Come on.

They legalized marijuana. So politeness has gone out the door and has been replaced by. I don't think being high makes you rude. Oh, dude. No, I'm just joking. It's not that bad. Well, it's the same as it's always been. It was a nice trip.

It was good. Like I said, I hadn't been back for quite some time. The last time I was in Canada was for an overnight stay, one night only, in Ottawa for a funeral. So I didn't really get to relive any of my childhood. I didn't get to go on any trips down memory lane or anything like that. Is that where you grew up? Memory lane. Yeah, memory lane was the name of my street yeah it's a it's a real good one

it's a nostalgia street yeah nostalgia street and uh just uh just down uh longing and yearning for your old high school girlfriend's way uh yeah spectacles estate isn't it that's yes that's the one yeah so um yeah no it was it was a good trip it was it was nice i had uh we had like a mini a mini reunion a whole bunch of uh of dudes that i grew up with uh made the the trip up a lot of people that i that i was friends with and still am friends with and grew up with that don't live in ottawa anymore they've dispersed so some of them live in Ottawa anymore. They've dispersed. So some of them live in Europe, funnily enough. And then a lot of them have moved to places like Toronto, Montreal,

which are more exciting than Ottawa. Yeah, Ottawa is just pretty boring. More exciting lives. Yeah, so they've moved. But they came up for the weekend and we had some nice parties and stuff. It was really good. I saw my parents. I saw my parents. I saw my brother. We rented a car, so I was able to drive around

and see stuff that I haven't seen for a long time and park behind schools that I haven't parked behind for a long time and got to smoke some weed while I was there as well. It was pretty good. The priorities. Yeah. priorities yeah it was no it was it was a really nice trip my kids have never been on a long-haul flight before so that was new and exciting and they they liked it they they liked watching tv um in the like the little tv that you get the seat in front of you like on most aircraft nowadays. So they enjoyed that.

And they were pretty good. You know, considering when we traveled, we were awake for sort of like 27 hours or whatever. They coped pretty well. There wasn't like any big meltdowns. There wasn't any problems at the airport or anything. It was good. It was smooth sailing. It was an icebreaker.

So now we can venture further afield as a family unit. It'll be great. Did you get any benefits from having the kids along? Were they sort of nicer to you? Yeah, you get to board the plane earlier than everybody else because I guess people just don't like kids and how long it takes people with kids to do stuff so they they let you board earlier yeah I feel like they are dealing with basically a taking time bomb yeah pretty much yeah which you can't actually say in an airport

no you're not allowed to say the words but it's it's universally acknowledged that that's the case and uh going through security lines as well everybody seems to if you've got kids they just usher you off into like a nice a nice empty queue with your own security thing because again it just takes you for fucking ever to get through and convince your kids to walk through the metal detectors and stuff like that so that's always fun so yeah you get a couple of perks but they don't make up for the fact that you're traveling with kids but you know there's still still perks nonetheless it's nice so did they manage to like come to the parties did they share the weed what was no no no they no they didn't they really

wanted to like every time i was about to go um my kids would look at me and i could see like the the marijuana leaves forming in their eyes. And they'd say, Dad, where are you going? And I'd be like, you know, I'm just going. Daddy's got to take his medicine. Got to go do my medicines. Yeah. But no, it was really nice.

It was a really good trip. I'm glad that we did it. Did anyone else bring their kids? Like did any of these other guys from school, dads? Like, probably like my best friend growing up is a dad. And he lives in Montreal now. So he drove down like on the weekend. But he didn't bring his family with him because his whole family were going to be coming down like the next weekend anyway for Easter.

So they're like, oh, we don't want to do the trip twice. whole family were going to be coming down like the next weekend anyway for Easter. So they're like, we don't want to do the trip twice. Yeah, so he's like, Okay, I'll just go by myself, which was fine, because we could go and party and stuff. It was it was pretty good. So but no, none of my other friends have bothered to have kids. Do you ever think about moving back to Canada? Or is that something that you'd ever think about doing or? You know, when I first moved over here, i thought about it because i was you know like when you live somewhere and you're used to the culture and you're used to like how things are and how like you know living and accommodation

stuff is set up you you move somewhere else and you're like ah fuck i wish i could just go back there it's easier i understand it better and blah blah blah exactly like at first i considered it but now that i've been here for like 15 years it's like fucking out of the question like i could never move back to north america like i'm too used to being close to europe and british culture and everything like i i would i would not want to live anywhere else now but that's probably because i'm like almost 40 and you know i'm content and i've settled a little bit and stuff. So, you know what I mean? It's different. Yeah, you've started to put down roots. I've put down big roots.

That's right. Yeah. I've thought about moving back to the States. We almost did it about 15 years ago. And then we were like, I just imagined, like you said, you're used to a way of life and people and the culture of the UK. And I was like, can i go somewhere where they're just there isn't really a sense of going for a sunday roast in a pub you know what i mean i'm like that is something i really really enjoy and i can't imagine never doing that again oh

everywhere you eat just being one of a few chains and stuff like that i i don't know i feel like america's uh it's a little too money centric for me. Everything seems to be about money. Everybody seems to be driven by money, even though all of us are in a way. I know, I know what you mean. In America, I feel it's too much. You know what I mean? It feels like it's everywhere. Yeah. It's just a different culture, isn't it? It is. They just do things differently. The politeness thing is also, I think the people think Canadians are polite because it's in comparison to Americans, right? Yeah. Whereas, like, comparison to Brits, we're quite polite generally.

Like, we're quite nice. But we also, like, I think, look, it was Easter bank holiday weekend just passed, and it was sunny. Like, we had, like, three or four days of sun. For some reason, the heavens opened and blessed us with, with like three days of weather that was enough oh my god yeah we came back it was like summer it was awesome just walking around though it was like a sea of of the whitest skin you've ever seen you know like it was like someone had let loose a lot of vampires yeah that's the one day of british summer basically everyone was had their shirts off in queen's square and there were people doing barbecues,

and there were people playing volleyball. It was really like the quintessential, people just came out of the woodwork, and everywhere was packed. I walked through in the evening, and there was just a bunch of people singing and playing their bands, and so they weren't busking.

They were just people playing in the middle of the centre of Bristol, various areas. It wasn't just necessarily in the nice areas but like you know it was it was very camaraderie i don't know it was very it was very kind of sense of community like sense of britishness and of course there's always like going to be a few weirdos around and homeless people and drunk assholes and football fans and you know i don't know it's but you know it that's the thing i think i've talked about this a little bit before like it's i think if you if you weren't like part of this culture it would feel very scary um much like it is in america whereas i think that when we go to america

because we're not used to it what everyone else sees as part of the furniture we see as a bit where we are on edge by it you know threat yeah yeah yeah we don't know when the weather is nice in america they go and they do the much the same they have barbecues and stuff but they also shoot guns up in the air the whole time too like an arab wedding yeah kind of yeah so like it's a little bit different you know it's can get very intense very quickly we had two barbecues in three days like i was like break it out straight away like boom let's go just i just do you have a big garden barbecue like that style yeah you have like a big fire pit or is it like one we don't have room for that instead i have uh do you light it or is

it like a propane tank do you have propane it's coals it's proper coals okay good so i use um a mixture normally if it's a big barbecue you get these awesome little bags that are like pre-wrapped in paper yeah and the whole thing's been soaked in paraffin yes like the corners bingo what i do is it's amazing right i fucking love them i can't i can't live without them i don't barbecue without them so we ran out we used them all up i had one left so i used it on the first barbecue second barbecue i was like all right so i i just started hunting around in my shed and honestly it's like a magical den you go in there you think i really thought i had some coal and you go in

there and bang there's a bag of coal it's like a bag of holding from dungeons and dragons you know you just reach into the shed and pull something out so i'm trying to get these coals going it's kind of getting there but it's taking a while you've got to have a lot of like kindling and paper you do so i had it in a nice pyramid i have my kindling but the only thing i had was like paper and it doesn't burn for long enough or hot enough to really get the coals going no yeah that's why you need some wood on there right or some of these little fire lighter tablets it's like styrofoam oh i don't know i've got i have some of those too and anytime i've ever tried to have a barbecue with that setup it's always it's too much like i don't think the coals burn hot enough but i'm

so desperate to get zone yeah i know i'm so desperate desperate to get the fake meat onto the barbecue that I put it on and then when we go to eat the fake meat, the burgers, it tastes like coals. Right. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, I found that it's a way to get the coals going and then I wait until they're properly ashen, like on the outside. They're all nice and ashen. If you blow, there's a glut. They're white. properly ashen like on the outside they're all nice and ashen there's a if you blow there's a glove right yeah so that I spread it out and then it was it was great um it was just it was like I didn't think I had any left to go to the magic magical shed of holding reach into a bag bam

of course I've still got some from last summer it's so easy for me to picture this scene though you know because it's so associated with definitely like my childhood as well. The barbecue is very quintessentially English that on a hot day, you know, your dad goes out there and it's the, you know, he's got his shorts on for the first time. Had a side of my hand,

getting my fucking BBQ. You know what kind of dad I am? I'm the shorts all year round kind of dad now. This year, this year especially, I have worn shorts like all year so far wow and track shorts as well which is even worse wow yeah yeah sometimes even when i go to town i wear them i'm just like well i'm done i don't even care anymore you're that guy yeah we know i know you there's one of a couple of you guys around i see around yeah i drop my kids off at school in the morning

and every once in a while, like I get like a knowing nod from another dad who's wearing shorts and stuff. And one time, a guy who normally wears shorts. You're dressed like you're going for a jog, but you're not. It's like almost snowing out and I'm wearing shorts and a coat

and like a hoodie underneath. And because I, again, I'm done. I just can't be bothered. And one time this guy who normally always wears shorts, I think he's like a delivery driver or works in a warehouse or something. So, you know, like those guys tend to just wear shorts all the time anyway. He wasn't wearing shorts. It was that cold out.

So this guy decided not to wear shorts. And he actually stopped me in the road and he's like, oh, you're still wearing your shorts? was like fuck yeah i am like it's almost like a competition yeah he's like thinking fuck i've lost the shorts competition no i think you know what i think it was i think he was gonna leave the house with the shorts on and uh flax you could probably you could probably sympathize with this and his wife said it's so fucking cold out there go and put some pants on immediately right and he was like okay so he had to reluctantly wear pants that day and then when he saw me in my shorts he was jealous yeah his legs are all sweaty yeah or it might have been like a secret society secret society of short wearers but he's like i didn't get the memo that we were shorting today. Yeah, it was like the Masons or like the Stonecutters or whatever.

But we're the short wearers. Oh, shit. There's the door. Hold on. That's all right. I don't run cold enough to manage shorts, honestly, Sips. I can't do it. I can't deal with shorts.

I'm always like... I love them. My legs... They're so comfortable. Holy crap. I love just wearing shorts. I can't deal with shorts. I'm always like, I love my legs. They're so comfortable. Holy crap. I love just wearing shorts. You know what? Just the freedom to let your,

like, just the airflow. Once you, once you take away half of the, of the, of the, of the pants and you're, you're with shorts,

you kind of get to the point where you're like, maybe I don't even need to wear shorts or underpants either. Like you, you can see how people like really like just being nude you know thousands of years ago right like it it is very liberating you know so so often sips you are just thinking as you have shorts just you're dreaming of taking the pants off under the shorts i'm wondering and the shorts too i'm i'm i'm sort of we have to be getting closer to accepting people just walking around fully nude in society right

like i think this you are approaching that age when for some reason a switch in your head goes off and it's actually do you know what i could i could be a nudist yeah i just i feel like it's a lot of hassle i see like i could see you with like a handkerchief with little twists in the corners on your head sitting on a nudist beach you know it's the only thing you're wearing it's always the people who have no business being nude who want to be nude as well that's right like you fucking never see like yeah liz hurley walking around nude it's always like you do mate someone linked it to liz hurley's overweight grandma walking around nude and yeah it's always like a big red guy with a red face like a big guy and his wife with like a huge belly sticking out and stuff like fuck you know what i was i was talking about

married life and everything i was thinking about this this morning why didn't al bundy want to have sex with peg yeah first of all let me stop you there. That was a wig, by the way. Peg's hair wasn't real in that. Are you for real? Yeah, I am. Hang on. Yeah, it was a big wig. Was it really?

A big old wig, yeah. Oh, well, you know, the character was still hot. Yeah. God damn, I was like, why isn't he having sex with Peggy all the time? She's literally saying, Al, come and make love to me. And he's just like, no, pig. Like, I don't get it. Because he was like a fucking shoe salesman he was like that it's true joy this is the joy he gets from life is he gets no he doesn't though that that that is how discontent works everything

that used to be nice and fun to you ceases to be because you're so miserable right maybe that's how it works either way i would have he's crazy oh you're crazy i would have too and fran drescher on the nanny as well okay i'm having to look up what show this is because i've never seen it you've never seen married with children before no i'm just slightly too young guys um 259 episodes yeah i know holy shit it's fucking on for massively famous such a bad show but yeah i remember watching it a lot as a as a young of course there was nothing else on it was tv back then i mean fucking american tv is still the same when we were over there holy shit i don't know how they do it i don't know how you find shows to even watch.

Like how do you people know where to watch shows? Like over here it's so easy. There's fucking four channels. Like you just, you find something and you put up with it. But over there, there's like a million channels. And holy shit, the fucking infomercials are crazy as well. Like they have not changed since the 1980s it's always that same american guy he's like he sounds like he's like 80 years old then he's like

oh they're just so creepy and weird and like uh i don't know they're on every one for the triforce podcast i can't even do it it's like they're just the stuff they advertise is so bizarre too it's always like that you know you know like in america like especially out in the stuff they advertise is so bizarre too it's always like that you know you know like in america like especially out in the suburbs people have a lot of disposable income and they're bored i guess and they buy like lots of weird fucking doodads for their home and garden and stuff so like there's a gigantic market like it's like that in the uk too right with like home base yeah it must be whatever but it just seems to be more prominent channel and everything yeah it seems to be more prominent over there it does yeah and um and so you just get like these weird commercials where it's like

you know it's like this very specific step ladder for a very specific thing in your garden but they sell it to you like it's it's a must-have item that you would just end up storing in your shed because you probably have like fucking 20 acres of land or whatever so you have like you know a big shed in the corner of that maybe that's it americans have a lot more space and you got to fill if you have space yeah you have to fill that space yeah like if you if you build more roads, more people drive on the roads, it doesn't alleviate traffic. It just means more cars. So maybe you have more space, you have more crap. Yeah, I could totally see the

allure of that though. Having like, like, that's a very American or Canadian sort of self self preparing kind of, you know, they're good. They're good at that. bunker. Talking of prepping, I watch a YouTube channel for this guy who does reviews of rations. I think he's called MRE Steve, I think is his name. That's not the channel name, but if you look for

rations and stuff, you'll find his stuff. He's brilliant. He's a very, very cool guy. He gets his old ration packs from the fucking 40s and opens them up and eats what's in there. But it's not in a gross way. So like, oh, I've heard of this guy.

You know, he'd be like, oh, this chocolate's got a lot of bloom on there. It's looking a little pale. But let's give it a try. And he'll try. Oh, oh, well, that's one of the worst things I've ever eaten. Oh. But it's great. And he says, he'll open up the pack he goes all right let's

see what we got here all right let's get this onto a tray and then it cuts and all the food's neatly laid out in a tray and he goes nice like every episode and i always wait for the let's get this out onto a tray i don't know why but i love the way he says it's it's his stuff is great anyway i was i've watched like all of his videos. I know. I know. Like, today we're going to be reviewing a 1995 Lithuanian Army MRE. Okay. And he opens it up, and he's got some kind of biscuit here, and got a little chili.

All right, yeah, we'll try that. And he's got this self-heating thing. So you just pour water in and give that a little shake, and set it to one side, and it steams and boils, and then you open it you open it and the food's fucking cooked so i was like i've got to try this so i ordered a couple of mre packs on the internet this morning i'll let you guys know what they're like well are you gonna make videos of yourself trying them out and stuff no i mean you're gonna like so much better he does it already he's done these before what's the point and somebody else what is it oh meals ready to eat is that what they are well you say that there's no room in the market for another contender like he's a good looking young guy he's in great shape he's got that great voice and he knows that he's

talking you're a bad looking old guy that can be your unique selling point you don't need to just because someone else is doing it doesn't mean you have to get involved you know you could take joy at other people's stuff. Like, I bought some of these MREs things for when we went on the camping day and we went and did the paintball thingy shoot. Don't starve. Whatever. With Hat Films.

I did it a while back. It was for a brand deal. And I bought a bunch of these things. I had a couple. And, man, they were all awful. Every one that I had. But I think it's because I had like the veggie ones. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, lame. Bean and rice burrito or something. You know what though? Like you say that they're awful, but the alternative is like if you ever watch, did you guys watch that documentary about the first world war? The Peter Jackson one? Yeah. You know, it was amazing.

It was amazing. Yeah, it was really amazing. But did you see like the bits where they were like taking and boiling water from no man's land to make tea and stuff and they boil up they boil up the water and they'd have like a fucking like green film forming at the top that they'd have to scrape off the water before they could use it to drink tea and stuff that's that's before you had like emergency rations and stuff right that's what you would have to do so you know maybe just like uh eat them and enjoy them and yeah and and not not take water from no man's land it is crazy that we expected people to fight for the

country but by god we're not going to feed and water them there's water in no man's land just move the dead bodies out of the way and get some water and stop complaining poor fucking guys man holy shit that's such a that's such a thing that uh that like soldiers always say like that if you give the soldier time to think they'll start complaining yeah i'm thinking no fucking wonder it's a miserable job oh my god it's incredibly dangerous and you're stuck in the middle of a fucking field getting shot at for weeks at a time drinking drinking trench tea drinking trench tea and eating the eating the dead like oh did you see the state of some of their feet and stuff too like like fucking gangrene and shit all over their feet fuck

and they just think how bad people's feet are ordinarily i know like you get a bunion or whatever and you're like oh my god this is the worst but those guys had like fucking black black flaps of skin coming off of their feet and stuff like all of their teeth you can see where we got the reputation for bad teeth their teeth were I mean snaggle tooth is a polite way of putting this yeah what the fuck is up with that is it just like a lack of dentistry yeah there's literally no braces nothing i know but they we're talking about like you know like the sort of like quite early 1900s like are you saying that other countries were like super advanced in the field of dentistry giving people braces and stuff i mean i don't know let's have a look let's let's just be a genetic thing right i think well i think most people like without any dentistry whatsoever will just have

kind of fucked up and crooked teeth right so like i don't know why why why is it just british people who have this um sort of like street cred for having bad teeth when like probably everybody does realistically have them but i guess some countries are just like more proactive with like preventing like the crooked teeth through dentistry or whatever i don't i don't understand they had dentists doing braces and stuff in the 20th century apparently jesus and they did they did teeth straightening in the 19th century like the like 1901 there was an american association of orthodontists. Really? Yeah, they did shit like this. They used rubber and elastics and all that kind of stuff way back then.

Holy fuck. I know. You learn something new every day. You really do. It just shows. Oh, my God. That's crazy. I was going to talk about TwitchCon, but if you have something to say.

No, no, no. Oh, yeah. Tell me about TwitchCon. I missed it. So, I want to know. This is the European TwitchCon, right? This was European TwitchCon but if you have something to say. No, no, no. Yeah, tell me about TwitchCon. I missed it. So I want to know. This is the European TwitchCon, right? This was European TwitchCon. First of all, at the airport on the way back, I was waiting for my plane and a lad came

up, young lad, and he said, and I was like, hello. And he hadn't been at TwitchCon. He just happened to be in Berlin that weekend with his girlfriend. He was like, oh, I'm a massive fan of the Triforce podcast. So I said i'd give you a shout out joe shout out to you nice to meet you mate oh and for doing shout outs i would also like to do one uh guy in ottawa at the beaver tail stand thanks so much for all the free beaver tails that was great it was it was our last day yeah everybody loved the beaver tails it was awesome i was standing in line to get some beaver tails and uh it was my turn and the guy was like uh yeah what can i get you it's like

canadian thing i'll have three beaver tails please and he's and he did this like sort of thing where he like you know like with his hand like pointed a gun at me sort of thing but not like in like a showmanship sort of way and he's like right uh my friend knows you so you get these for free. I was like, what? Your friend knows me. So I looked behind him and the guy who was like, you know, making the beaver tails was like, oh, hey, I love the Triforce podcast. He's like, all right.

Amazing. Wait, so I have a question. Is a beaver tail what it sounds like or is it something else? It's shaped like a beaver tail. Okay, so it's not shaped like a beaver tail okay so it's not an actual fry it's like it's it's like a flat crispy donut basically it's just like yeah and then you can put like toppings on it so like you could put like cinnamon and sugar is like the sort of traditional topping but okay they've they've gone nuts you can like cut up a banana put chocolate sauce on there and sprinkle it

on their minds you can put applesauce on there and shit like if you go to Canada and have beaver tail just get the

traditional one they've ruined it yeah yeah it's crazy it's too much it's too much Sips goes back he's like

god they even changed beaver tails this is too much we're never coming back this is ridiculous that's this is the most canadian thing i've ever heard you know what's you know what's really weird though like as as much fun as i had and everything at points in the trip i felt like a little bit i don't know if you guys have ever had this okay like because maybe you guys live closer to where you grew up and stuff

like i've i i moved away from where i grew up. So for me going back after like 10 years or even more in some cases, I always like everybody that I knew that lived there, I've sort of like packed them away into like a time vacuum in my mind, right? So like sometimes I go back to these places and like I drove by like my old school, for example, because like sometimes i go back to these places and like i drove by like my old school for example because like i thought oh well you know be funny to see

like if it's changed or whatever it hasn't it's just the exact fucking same like for a split second i thought oh maybe i could go in there and see um steve and like like like steve is still steve's like fucking 40 years old now i don't even know where he is is. But like, you know, in my mind, he's still there. You know, that's the last time I saw him was in that school. So he must still be there just doing the same old shit. Right. But there's no way he is. So like part of my trip was like a little bit depressing at times because I'd go, I'd

see these places or I drive by like, you know, like my friend's like old house or whatever. And it's kind of sad to think that like, I don't know, like my friend and his family used to live there and now they don't. And that's gone forever, right? It's impossible to get that back. It feels a little bit like it was a different you almost. Yeah, yeah. So like there's times where I'd be driving around or something,

like looking at like my old neighborhood and it's like, oh fuck, like all these people that I know have just gone and I have no idea where they are or what they're doing like a lot of times i'll never get those times back it's jogging your memory as well constantly right it's like it's like oh my god i remember this place i remember this thing it's amazing the stuff that's in your head that you're like and it all you don't you don't think about it before you go out to see it right yeah so for example um my mom went over christmas showed me um an old dvd that a guy had recorded on his vcr of the onga wait wait a dvd on a vcr that's not a compatible how did he do

that that's crazy no but he sorry he'd recorded it on one of these old um i'm gonna google it on one of these old vcr camcorders like all right okay now you're making sense. It was like 2001, 2002. So I'd come back from uni and I was like 17, 18 or whatever. And I was helping out at the Onger Medieval Fair. So I had long hair. I'll maybe show it to one day. But basically I've got this really strong Essex boy accent. And it's weird. So it's weird for me to see it.

But as we were watching this thing, I was more interested in all this stuff that I recognised and there was a lot of people that I recognised, but because I was at the medieval fair and a lot of the people were kind of old people, a lot of them had died and it was like, oh yeah, that's old Ken. You remember Ken?

I'm like, yeah. And mum's like, oh, he's dead now. I was like, what, okay. It's like, oh yeah, there's old Alice. She's dead. Oh, that's Roger. He's dead. He's dead as like, yeah. And mum's like, oh, well, he's dead now. I was like, what? Okay. It's like, oh, yeah, there's old Alice. She's dead. Oh, that's Roger. He's dead. He's dead as well.

Yeah. So it's like, it was just a fucking litany of, like, corpses. I was like, God, this is a bit fucking depressing. I didn't really realise. But it's like, well, you see some World War II footage or some footage of anything older than that and you realize everyone on that is going to be dead now you know like

it's kind of weird to see like that sort of stuff and think about it like that because it's not the instant thing that you go to no it was really strange but like I don't know I guess like I don't know if you guys have ever experienced that but it was a weird one I don't know like it's probably combination of being like jet lagged and tired and stuff too

like sometimes your mind like not plays tricks on you but you're not like thinking like how you normally would sort of thing no so maybe i felt like a bit more sort of like it is a jarring feeling going back somewhere that you to a different life it's almost like stepping into a different sort of period of time and like trying to be being a different person yeah you know yeah um yeah you know what my kids my kids favorite thing that we did the whole time we were there was we went through a drive-thru at wendy's and we got chocolate frosties twice and they fucking loved it i did too oh my god it was amazing it's so good yeah yeah i didn't even need to fucking get out of the car it was awesome we don't have any drive-thrus over here so it was a real novelty yeah it was a jersey oh no i guess you don't well maybe that's that maybe that's the business opportunity sips that you've been

missing out on you know a BeaverTales. I thought about it when I got back. I was like, maybe I can make a drive-thru, but it just wouldn't work over here. You've got to add a new spin. Drive-thru donuts and dildos. You need space for it, though. That's the thing.

Yeah, and vapes. It takes up a lot of space, a drive-thru. You have to have the big lead-up, and then you have to have the fucking, you know, the little thing that you talk into with the menu and stuff. And then you have to drive up to one of the windows and like. Is it like, it's like going through a car wash. I mean, much more elaborate.

Yeah, that's it. Was it like going on a fairground ride for them, but there was food at the end, you know? Not really. I think they just like are obsessed with chocolate. So like. Oh, I see. It's like some frosty chocolatey um ice cream sugary mess the back seat they were like yeah fuck this is amazing but you know what i felt so middle-aged the other day when we went to the car wash me and mrs f my mom was up for a couple of weeks left the kids at home we popped

the shops and then she was like let's go through the car wash. And I was like, ooh, yeah, let's do it. And we went through the car wash together. That was what we did. That was the thing we did as a couple that day, was we went through the fucking car wash. And we loved every minute of it. Yeah, I always remember going through the car wash and the big monsters coming out and slapping themselves on the screen.

Well, my eldest remembers the last time she went through a car wash very well because I accidentally left her window open a tiny bit. Oh, yeah. And it started spraying water into that. She got some hot wax on her face. She was terrified. I don't care if she's been mutilated ever since. She threw herself into the footwell on the other side of the car.

She was like, what? I was like, what's happening? There was like tepid water coming through the window. We remind her of it often. Dirty foam water. Oh, so TwitchCon. Yeah, yeah, back to TwitchCon. Sorry about that.

I went out to Bristol and hung out with the guys a little bit. And then we went to Berlin. It was nice being on the plane with everybody. You know, we had a laugh. And got to the hotel, dropped all our stuff off, and we went to Berlin. It was nice being on the plane with everybody. We had a laugh. Got to the hotel, dropped all our stuff off, and we went straight out. We were on it that whole evening. We went to the Twitch welcoming party that they had at the conference center, which was pretty big.

But if I had a criticism, I'd say there wasn't quite enough to do there, I think, for the average spectator who was going along. There really wasn't. There was some speeches to watch and stuff, but there wasn't really much to do. Right? You know what I mean? Like I feel like the point of it though, people just go and meet their favorite streamers. I think so. I don't know how many people there were streamers. I would say a lot like I saw a lot there was a lot of people walking around filming themselves and live streaming them going down an escalator or getting a coffee or whatever is like not the kind of that we do but anyway they were doing that i was there to hang out with the yogs guys and meet some people who i hadn't seen in a while um so it was great i

mean we just we went out every single night like the first night we went out we went to the yogs party i mean not the the twitch party sorry went there had all the free booze had a chat played some arcade games hung out it was a good laugh i'm gonna i'm going back to the hotel i want to get a kebab tom tells me oh yeah it's one like just across there to the right so i go over there there was no kebab place for like a mile i found a five guys sex shops yeah so i got my five guys i'm gonna go back to my hotel room i come back to the bar to say good night to everybody and there's my friend brian who i haven't seen in a long time um he used to be on the dota scene um k-pop for anyone that remembers um oh yeah oh yeah he was a cool guy so he now works for dnd beyond i was

like holy shit brian i haven't seen you in years so it's like really good to see him and he was like we're gonna go do karaoke oh he's not from california he's he's from alabama he gonna go do some karaoke while joining this period i was like i surely do so I was like shit I was about to go to bed I was pretty drunk but I thought fuck it the lure of karaoke is enough found a karaoke bar was packed with Twitch people all these people in there obviously from the Twitch con thought fuck yeah let's do karaoke managed to get ourselves a private room we were going to like four in the morning which couldn't stop us we went absolutely nuts I went to bed I got home ate my freezing cold burger in my hotel room and went to sleep woke up the next day went into twitch con i was hungover all day went out for a quiet drink with tom and ben that evening

to the quote unquote irish pub um which we only it was in the fucking the basement of a shopping mall but the reason we went there is because tom was like wanted cider he had to have cider he couldn't stand just drinking german beer i love german beer I'm a big fan oh my god yeah it went in Germany you don't need to have cider right well we found a place that sold pulmers and magnars and thatchers so Tom was happy and it had a smoking room wow like a room where you could go in there and smoke which is so alien to anyone from Britain like in Germany we like this is the weird thing you think about Europe as being more advanced than us right that is the weird thing you think about europe as being more advanced than us right that's the way i always think when i go to places like germany

and sweden and stuff always think of them as being more advanced and and sort of you know socially more aware and more cool and progressive and everything and you go to germany and there's people fucking smoking everywhere and you go into this smoking room and everybody in there is smoking like crazy i was like this is like going back in time like i can't believe it but i think like you know i think i think fair enough you shouldn't be able to smoke like in restaurants you shouldn't be able to smoke in office buildings and stuff but i don't know why there's like all these laws now where you can't smoke near a building right i agree we've gone too far and when you couldn't even have a private members club yeah where you can smoke so they were like cigar clubs i think they were fucked over in a big way like if i want to have a bar where you

can smoke why can't i have a bar it should be a blanket band there should be a bar where it's like this is this is part of like the things that you can do in our bar smoking is one of them if you don't like it don't fucking come right you know go somewhere else she was with the employees who wouldn't have a choice so their job is to stand there in 10 bar and they're surrounded by smoke i understand that argument i get it sure but having an area where you can go and sit i don't have a problem with that i'm pretty sure the bar staff don't have a problem with that but i'll tell you what i'd forgotten how fucking smelly cigarettes were because for the rest of the weekend, I smelled a cigarette.

Remember when you used to be able to smoke in nightclubs, pubs, everything? Holy fuck, you'd get home and you'd just smell like a goddamn chimney. You'd stank of it, right? So my coach stank of cigarettes for the next week. And my daughters were like, oh, it smells amazing. I was like, don't smell the cigarettes. That's a bad thing. So that was the second night. It was exactly the same in certain places in japan like um they used to used to be

all these arcade buildings like the sega buildings this huge arcade in akihabara wherever the sort of arcady district and although all the placo pachinko parlors are all just full or at least used to be just so full of people smoking yeah that they absolutely stink and they even now when smoking is banned the buildings still just absolutely and they just can't get the smell it's a very persistent smell which is why places didn't smell of anything but cigarettes like that was the thing is nightclubs smelled like sweat the buildings in japan are all because they're all crammed in and all like they're all kind of high-rise buildings like the arcades are like a five-story building but they're not that

big you know it's like a room right and then there's another one above it and another one above it and every room above it smells more strongly because of all the smoke rising up and the top one is like oh my god imagine what they would it's like where they were still smoking though because it must have just been full of like you know they need to have like a chimney on the top to like fucking let that shit out have you ever have you guys ever been in a nightclub where you've either stayed right to the end and you're literally one of the last people to let out and they turn on all the lights or there's like a fire alarm and they turn on all the lights or whatever oh it looks so fucking so depressing isn't it it's one of the worst times

because you realize it's like it's like a sci-fi thing where you've been wearing like these lovely rose tinted goggles but actually been staying in like this room full of slime and like because the lighting is like king right or the lack of i should say and like everything is painted black too right because it just you know to hide the you know because it's already dark and there's a laser show and smoke and like techno or whatever. You don't want that. You realize the woman you've been dancing with is like a troll. Yeah.

And you look up and there's always fucking beige ceiling tiles from when you used to be able to smoke in there. And they're all stained with the smoke and stuff. And oh, it's so fucking depressing. And you realize that the stickiness the floor is star it's just like a big wake-up call for everyone they're like what am i doing yeah yeah it's the worst isn't it up until that point you were having a great time absolutely holy shit so so you would just say i mean the thing about smoking with the guys is that you know i don't really go to the pub anymore with them because they always sit outside and i mean you you'll be fine you know

sips in your shorts you know last time i was in bristol i sat outside the whole time it's fine yeah it's like pouring with rain you know it's like fucking freezing cold yeah but you huddle together for ice cold pine smoking until the early hours and drinking it's like oh i can't i can't be doing it i can't can't hack it yeah it was good so we were in there and then and then on the on the sunday like i was pretty hung over at this point i don't normally go out back to back nights especially not till 4 a.m i felt like a like a real grown-up for a while and then on the sunday we went out for this big german meal big heavy stodgy like you know my favorite kind of the whole weekend you're just drinking oh it was unbelievable vaping and it was heaven it was heaven i'm eating bratwurst i'm eating currywurst i'm eating butt kartoffel and i'm drinking german Ken, you're just drinking and fucking vaping and eating. It was heaven. It was heaven.

I'm eating bratwurst. I'm eating currywurst. I'm eating buttkartoffel. I'm drinking German beer. I'm loving it. We got a waitress in a dirndl serving us. Me and Terps are competing to take pictures with her and stuff like that. It was great.

And then afterwards, we went out to this bar. And it's so different when you go out in Germany, especially in Berlin, is there was no is there was no no one looking at their watches and saying yeah drink up drink up nothing we were there till half four and the place was still bumping and they were still ready to go and they weren't saying this is it we're going to close in a sec they're just open till whenever no problem nice so we were just it's it's so relaxing and i feel like in the uk our constant quest is to get as drunk as possible before they kick you out because they're shutting. That's true. Whereas in Germany, they're just like, no, no, you can take as long as you like.

And it honestly takes the edge off. I'm not constantly thinking, shit, if I'm still up for a drink and they shut it too, what the fuck do we do next? There's no panic. There's no abandoned ship element where you are, remember yourself, try and find an off license. You know, it was literally no problem, just chill. And then when you've had enough and you're knackered you go home easy peasy it was great culture you know that's what they're used to as well probably that's just the way it is we're used to it's just how they do that's how they do we're used to the drunken kebab run uh yeah at 3 a.m you know

and that's just how they do how we do but it was it was a really good weekend was cracking cracking i'm glad you had a good time did you i mean you knew was it just drinking in Berlin like no, no, no, no I do anything anything in this stuff. Did you guys do at actual twitch? We did a meet-and-greet and it was us like it was me turps Duncan and shin we were sat at our little table and then there was soda poppin. Who's like a big streamer He was over at his table. Yeah, he oh his queue was big like we took yeah we took a picture our queue was like 20 or 30 noble yogs fans you know and then it got bigger but at that point that we took the picture there was very few people i mean it's not bad considering one of you out of the four streams regularly so

like that's that's a pretty good turnout right oh well yeah we got we got a decent number i mean you know we were there for an hour and a half and at that point that was when we'd signed everything and and chat to everybody it was nice they were all really happy to see us lots of people saying they love the podcast so that was that was really nice to hear nice soda was there until like 2 2 a.m almost certainly was just laid back you know just drinking he was taking his time. He was having a good chat with everybody. He was eating bratwurst and

whatever, you know, just like doing karaoke on his booth and stuff. And yeah, I met some people and then I did the PJ Salt Challenge where they get eight streamers up onto the stage and you all have to play these stupid party games and the winner gets to go to the TwitchCon in San Diego or San Francisco, whichever one it is right um did you win no i came essentially joint third

because disappointed would you ever go to the one in america the i mean for free sure but i don't want to have to pay for a flight to america and hotels and everything but i mean i know that the uh the the ticket you know was like they'll fly you out there and put you up and everything like that so we did these games we played this game called swordy kind of like gang beasts controls but you pick up weapons from around this arena and you have to smack each other in the face that was fun then we played something i think it was called tiny towers which is sort of like tetris oh yeah but you have to like competitive yeah i've played that yeah so you you stack up and there's like spells you can cast on your opponents. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And there was one guy, none of us have played any of the games, but this one guy who eventually won it had played that game before. He was like, oh, I love this game. I played all the time. And I was like, eh, we lost. So I made it through to the final four. And then I had to pair up with this very sweet Russian girl. She was with me.

And then he was with this, I can't remember her name, another girl. So we were paired up, and we had to play against each other, and it was meant to be overcooked. But they couldn't get overcooked to work, so they said, let's just play Tiny Towers again.

And I was like, what? Like, oh, he's getting salty. I'm like, no, that's just bullshit. Like, that's the guy that we've already established. He knows how to play. It's fixed. It was fixed. He already knows how to play that game.

So he fucking crushed us, of course. Goes to the grand final and they play this stupid game. You know the wavy arm guys? Like that. They sort of fill up with air that they have outside car places. Like Marcus says to me, do they have those over here? Like the wavy arm guys? I was like, yeah, pretty sure I've seen them.

And they have these two either side of the stage that waved like crazy. And it was like a fighting game where you're playing the wavy arm guys. All right. And he won. And so he gets to go to fucking Twitch. It's like Mr. Tickle fighting against Mr. Tickle. Exactly. It was funny.

Wavy ass arms. I wouldn't have minded a shot. I mean, you know, why don't we fucking 1v1 Dota or something? You know what I mean? Come on. Roll the game out that I know. It's out that i know you're used to yeah i imagine he still beat you though at dota no no we're gonna beat me okay impossible it'd be really funny though that would be funny because ours is a great i'm 7k oh shit my trump card yeah so uh so twitchcon europe recommended would you do it again i think for a first time

it was a very smooth event they didn't have any technical problems no ticketing problems it didn't feel like you had to queue for ages to do anything the food area was nice outside it was nice and spacious they had a really nice partner lounge to hang out in in that it was big and there was seats but it could have been a bit more i think it could have given us a bit more food because it was quite hard to get food the place isn't really near stuff so it's like they had the food stands outside but it wouldn't have minded a few more beers paul fucking paul choi was on the beers straight away like we arrived midday and he was like where's the beers and he was just on it straight away um but yeah i think he drank all the free beer but yeah it was it was okay but again if

you were uh if you were a spectator, I would think there wasn't a huge amount to do. That would be my criticism. But I think for a first attempt, it was good. I think you have to be up for spending all night out drinking with the lads, you know? And that's for some people. Other people, it's not for them. Oh, it was great.

They don't have legalized marijuana in Germany, do they? No, but they have amazing beer and sausages and pretzels. I thought I'd made this clear. Yeah, but it's not fluff. I mean, I think you've got to enjoy it in your own way. I think this is part of the reason that I kind of enjoy BlizzCon, but I think I prefer to enjoy it sat

on a sofa with popcorn, you know, that I can pause it and turn it on and off rather than... Yeah, unless it was last year's BlizzCon which was just not enjoyable under any circumstances even if you were there

if you were there or at home you just have to learn these things at different times in your life I think you want different things and also if you've got different groups of friends sometimes you just want to tag along with a guy who's leading the way through a drunken stag weekend

in berlin as you fucking get wasted like a stag weekend in a way it actually did well that's not a bad thing no it's great i'm just saying the convention itself i'm not talking about my enjoyment of the weekend i had a whale of a time i'm just saying if i'd paid money to go there i'd be thinking it could have been more to do that's what but again it was their first go what would you give it out of 10 my personal personal experience, 10 out of 10. I had a great time. I had a great time. All right.

But like from the point of view of a consumer who would like to go to, I would probably say five or six. I think that they would, they would want to see next, next year would need a little more improvement with stuff to do. Right. But yeah, other than that, it was okay. Yeah. For them.

What would you ask? What would you do? Like, were there a lot of people streaming like a from like as you went around like on there I'm playing games and stuff like that. That's one thing So if you like let's think about comic-con when you go to comic-con There's you go there and if you're not willing to spend money We didn't come there to specifically meet certain actors and stuff There's not like a huge amount to do like I always think of it as being like let's have some games companies in here doing demos of games that are going to be good for streaming and let's have some let's have

a guy streaming and you get to play with him on stream stuff like that I feel like that should have been much more they should have done a lot more of that um but it kind of felt like they were maybe it's tricky to think of things to do but they needed to they need to think of a few things to do yeah it's hard to like entertain to entertain the crowd and keep a show going almost and just plan something and have it hosted well. Bearing in mind it's in Germany as well. Gamescom is always tricky to know

whether you do it for the German crowd or to do it all in English. It's a tricky thing to do. And also for streamers to come out. Streamers are streaming every day and they lose four days of streaming effectively by coming out to this thing. And it feels like, is it for the streamers is it for the fans like it just feels like i don't know quite who it's from i agree that they should do it and i think that it just needs

to find its feet and i think yeah so i'm telling me i mean it's first effort in europe i i feel like uh it could have had a little more stuff but i don't know maybe they couldn't get like big games companies to commit because who knows it's like a gamble it's the first time they've done it you don't know if it's going to be a success or whatever but yeah i think it was as a first effort i was very very oh yeah that's the first time they'd done a european one exactly but the big keynote speech that they gave the big announcement was that they're going to pay us in 15 days instead of 45 and everyone was like okay that's not very exciting well i mean nothing around like the business side of twitch is ever really that

exciting is it a lot of the time you're like a cons coming up like we've got your con coming up in august and um it's a small thing like 800 people can come and and it's going to be a really small event and we're not going to really that's a lot of that's a lot of coming holy crap we're we're not we're not gonna like we don't really know what we're doing. We're just all going to wing it. And I'm sure it will be hopefully not terrible. No, I guarantee you that Terps and other people are planning all kinds of shit for people to do. Don't say that we're just going to wing it.

You're just not involved. We need to get Sips running like a Beaver Tales. Beaver Tales. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And like, Pyrrhon, you could do like a bodega bodega stand you can dress up get a picture with bodega how about that yeah before we uh before we wrap up because i sense a wrap-up uh is is imminent it feels like a wrap-up can we um can can i get your thoughts on if you've seen

have you guys seen this this tweet about uh undateable superhero movie watching men and that guy reacting to the new star wars trailer have you guys seen that did you see this link it in discord i want to see this hang on a second let me just find it for you it's gonna take you might want to just cut this bit while i look for actually hang on a second what should i google on data undateable uh star wars man oh yeah he comes up straight away okay these are all youtube ones it's it was a it was off a tweet i think i found the tweet star wars and superhero movie obsession culture has revealed a whole new population of undateable men yeah it might be worse than men who wear cargo shirts yes okay now watch the video okay it's like you don't have to watch the whole

thing just watch it for like uh 15 or 20 seconds or whatever just like just to get to to get a a sense of what this guy's uh reaction to this is sort of thing look at him are you watching it too i'm watching a video of him jesus calm down dude yeah you should see him reacting to watching the star wars trailer right that's what i'm watching yeah yeah he's like tearing up yeah yeah and he's going like oh yeah yeah like he's like so fucking excited yeah this is so memeable like you can just put it well it is i mean the video the the video embedded in that tweet's been seen like over 10 million times like it's crazy so so like i've been put like i i'm torn on the whole thing because i i get being like loving something and being passionate about it or whatever uh but on the other side i've never

reacted to anything like that in my life like i've never had uh uh uh i what i would consider a very over-the-top emotional reaction to something so kind of that doesn't deserve it it's a movie yeah i'm very excited to see movies like i get it i i watched the trailers i'm like oh shit that's gonna be amazing yeah yeah this guy looks like he's been told he's gonna live forever yeah so like he is like tearing up yeah genuinely you know it's very hard to fake this reaction yeah yeah i don't think it's faked i i don't think it's actually faked and like so you know the whole tweet was was sort of like i it's a little bit like mean-spirited because you you you kind of feel a bit sorry for the guy because like whatever you know like he likes

star wars or whatever obviously like to to react like that but it is a ridiculous reaction at the same time he's, he's, he's totally, oh, it's pretty adorable. He's obviously stoked to, I don't know. I find it unsettling.

Personally, I find it a bit unsettling. Like I've watched it a couple of times now. I find it really strange and kind of weird and stuff. I don't, I don't, I, I,

a lot of people are like, oh, leave him alone. You know, he's adorable, blah, blah, blah. I don't know if he is. Okay. I'm just saying, I don't know. I don't, I don't, I, I, a lot of people are like, oh, leave him alone. You know, he's adorable, blah, blah, blah. I don't know if he is.

Okay. I'm just saying, I don't know. I don't know if I feel like that. I think it's kind of sweet. I mean, the dude's found something he loves. Fair play to him. He's, this is the happiest moment of his day. Look how fucking happy he is.

I'd rather see that than some guy doing a fake bullshit reaction. Sure. I mean, for the views. Yeah, of course. But at the same time react video i agree is he is he somewhere on the spectrum um very possibly he could possibly be there was one of those fucking react videos there was some streaming guy it had like 8 000 users like hey guys what's up and he does he just it's just his camera and in the corner he's reacting to like some fucking

video and he's just eating popcorn and watching and occasionally he goes whoa and he'd say i'm like that's not reacting okay so anyway wow so so the video the the thing that you just watched i showed it to my wife okay and her her reaction to it was was amazing she so i So I show it to her. I give her the context and I show her the thing and she's watching it. And she's not saying a word, right? I was like, I was just waiting for it. I was like, oh, I wonder what she's going to say sort of thing. And then she, so she turns around.

She's like, is this fucking for real? And I was like, yeah, I guess so. Like, how do you fake that? Like he's, you know, he obviously really likes Star Wars or whatever. And she turns around and she goes, if I ever caught you doing that, I would slap you right in your fucking face. Oh, my God. And I thought, you know what? Fair enough.

That's probably deserving. I married the right woman. You killed me. She's just got no fucking time for that shit at all. Fuck, it was so funny. Just the delivery and everything was just perfect. Oh, god damn. Holy shit.

Well, there you go. That's our podcast for today. Yes. Let's just leave it there. Thanks, everyone. Bye. We'll see you next week. We'll be back then. All right, bye for today. Yes. Let's just leave it there. Thanks, everyone. Bye. We'll see you next week. We'll be back then.

All right, bye. Patreon. Bye.