Triforce! - We Liking the Rough Stuff | Triforce Mailbag #53

Episode Date: April 23, 2025

Triforce Mailbag Special 53! A big bulging sack bursts some premium mail ranging from the classic corrections to incredible stories about Russian video rental customers! Go to http://auraframes.com and use code TRIFORCE to get $20 off their best-selling Carver Mat frame. Go to http://expressvpn.com/triforce today and get an extra 3 months free on a 1-year package! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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If you like this kind of thing as I do, you can check out Kaya's Prophecy, available now on Steam with a 20% launch discount and for a limited time you can get an extra 10% off if you pick it up in a bundle with Dungeons and the Degenerate Gamblers, our other amazing Yolkscast game. You can even head on over to our friends at Fanatical to grab your copy today for even cheaper. www.fanatical.com slash pickaxe. Kyre's Prophecy is awesome, it's out now, I love it and you should check it out. Do you like cards? Do you like battling? Do you like games on Hello friends and welcome, welcome once again to the mailbag. I don't know which mailbag this is, but I hope you enjoy it. I'm here. It's number five. Mailbag number six. Number two.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Number two. Joined by Sish. Hello. And Lulis. Lulis. Lulis. Lulis. Lulis Brumidly. How are you guys doing? Hi, I'm Ryan Inn.

Dear mailbaggers. Man. Man. Mailman. Mailman. Mail people. Mail friends. I'd like to strongly complain about something that was said in the latest episode of the podcast.

You and your friends didn't know nothing about subjects and quite frankly offended me and my family. I have been so upset that I have written this very long and sternly worded email, very long as well and just a waste of time really. Yeah. Because it turns out I also don't really know much about what I'm talking about. So here we are. Two people butting heads together and neither of us know what we're talking about. On that note, I have an email from James. Lewis calling out Kersgesacht on their accuracy seemed pretty rich to me.

Naturally, the standard for Lewis should be lower as an entertainer rather than an educator, but even so, his track record isn't pretty. To cite his own words from earlier in the same podcast, he claimed that their video on milk portrayed it positively. However, aside from debunking some claims that it is carcinogenic or contains large doses of certain hormones, the video also made a point to highlight the contribution to obesity and climate change. It even went so far as to describe dairy farms as torture camps. So there you go. So you listed it. You've been called out. Yeah. What's your response? Well, you know, I think, um, I think there's a lot of people who are quite happy to toe the line,

you know, quite happy to like, you know, side with the man, you know, I think their meat thing, their meat episode is very much like, Oh, don't get upset with us, but maybe you shouldn't eat meat. Like, you know, puts little finger to mouth. It's very, they're very kind of Kurzgesagt. They're doing a great job, honestly. I love their videos, but I also think they're very much, they're very scared to upset anyone. Yeah, they don't want to, they don't want to go full in. You mean I'm not, uh, I've never seen any of these videos. I don't even know what you're talking about. Um, I just want to put that out there, but, uh, but I'm getting a sense that

maybe they don't want to overextend themselves, uh, by making a, you know, lumping in with no way back sort of thing. Yeah. Is that accurate? I think Lewis's point is that, or perhaps his point is, and you do see this from some, quite a few content creators really, that they try to both sides a lot of stuff and sort of just be like, oh, you know, it's up to you. Of course, you know, we don't have an opinion, we're just expressing facts here because the moment you actually come down on one side, the other side's going to

rinse you. So it's much more profitable. I don't mind facts, but oftentimes facts are presented not as facts. It's, it's, it's, it's opinion, you know, it happens. And often the other way around too. I think in our world these days, disinformation is a massive problem, a real thing. And many opinions are facts. The idea of opinions as valuable as facts is something I have a huge problem with.

And I think that people say, well, you've got to respect my opinion. It's like, no, I hate that saying he's entitled to his opinion. No, he's not. People he's entitled to his opinion. No, he's not. People are not entitled to an opinion. You have to form it. He is, he is entitled to his opinion, but he should also recognize sometimes that maybe his opinion is not right. It's just, you know, it's not correct.

Sometimes I, I, I think sometimes we'll have an opinion about something and we'll recognize that that opinion maybe isn't politically correct or just completely non-factual. Like, you know, like we will talk about something that we know very little about most of the time. And, um, but I think we're honest about that. You know, I don't think we're, I don't think we're so confident in what we're saying all the time that it comes across as fact, which for other people, I think that happens way too much.

Mason- I think people get very entrenched and very committed to their opinions too. And get very angry defending them. I.e. defending false facts. And you can't argue with them either. There's this long-standing idea that it's not worth trying to convince someone. If you've got an elderly relative who believes that some, I don't know, something awful, makes something up, it's just not worth trying to come up with a presentation for them or like trying to figure out even even if you're fucking Bill Nye the science guy or you know what's his face? Neil deGrasse Tyson? Neil deGrasse Tyson, yeah. You know.

Space is so big you won't believe it. And then he tells you some fact. If you took a marble, he's like, God, Neil, just get to the point. Like the pauses that my man puts between sentences are insane. I also, some of the stuff he reveals as being like mind blowing seems like stuff you would be telling kids in primary school. Like that's the level. I think some of the stuff that he's not all that mind blowing. Yeah. It's just, I think it was the first time I heard it. People just go nuts for these guys. Maybe

it's mind blowing for an eight year old. But, I mean, space is cool. Don't get me wrong. God loves space. Hey, please don't email in saying we hate space. We love space. Alright, let's do an email. I don't hate Neil deGrasse Tyson particularly, but I do think he said some shit as well,

actually. I don't care. I've never even heard Neil deGrasse Tyson speak before. I feel like, oh, he re-did Cosmos or whatever. He did, like, um, which is a big deal. He's just a guy. I don't care. He's a big science educator.

Yeah, he is. And I think that a lot of these people- Encouraging people to get into science is good. Even the most primary two science commentators that I've suggested there- The most primary! Primary! The best ones are both problematic in some ways. I think I both anyway, it just goes to show that that's part of the problem. Isn't it? Good luck everyone out there. Fuck you. Here's an email.

Best of luck. He's left. He's gone. I work for weather spoons. You might have heard of them. Obviously lots of people come through and some of them leave behind their shopping lists. I've been finding one recently. I was reminded of your request for pictures to add to your collection of shopping lists. I agree, they're a fun voyeuristic window into someone's life and I always feel quite cheeky reading what someone else is out for and where they're going. So here is one I'm reading. It's Wilco is at the top of the list and Wilco is then crossed out. I don't know why. And the list reads as follows. Curtain hooks, dog

treats, cushions? Right. Look at prices for electric sockets. Sainsbury. And then I think it says bitter lemod, fish, custard creams. Then it says Poundland. And then it says crisps. I love the fact that it's telling which shop to go to. Like you're writing a list of where you're going to go, not just a shopping list. They might be trying to like plot an efficient route, you know, like if they look at their list and they see what shops they need to go to, then it helps them do like a nice circuit or, you know, I guess I will just say that the lad sending these in the pictures pictures of these, Jacob got these in a Wetherspoons. So these people are making a list of where they're going to be.

They're Wetherspoons customers. But then they're going to Wetherspoons as well. So they're stopping in for a few pints as well as going shopping. On the shopping trip. Yeah. You've got to loosen up a little bit before you go do your errand sometimes, you know? Yeah, sure. I get it. I get it.

This guy's buying a coffee, coffee mare. I don't know what that is. Sweet pots, mixed leaf, whole grain, raw king prawn, cherry, lollipst capers, oatmeal, red onion. When you, uh, if you, I don't, I don't do a lot of shopping unless, um, you know, my wife asks me to. Right. I'm not like a very, I'm not a good shopper. My wife gives me a list and I will

just get what's on the list. I don't really think outside the box much. I do very occasionally, but predominantly if I'm out doing stuff I want to be quick so I can get back. I don't want to be out for too long. Mason. So your wife is the one who is kind of deciding what's being cooked and eaten. So you're just an errand boy on the trip. Alistair. Pretty much. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just like the logistics. I'll go out and get the stuff. Mason. So you're the one trying to decipher the list. Bitterlemon. What does she mean by that? Alistair. I don't know. Bitterlemon. She's fine. I never have any problems deciphering the list, but I always feel a bit like, you know, maybe I could be more involved or enthusiastic with it, but I just can't, I can't do it.

Being a good, being a good gatherer is this is probably all that's needed. If I have a shopping list, I wrote it down, someone brings back everything on that list. Fucking brilliant. That is like the perfect scenario. I don't want them ad libbing on the list. I don't want to get a call halfway through the list saying, no, if there's no, um, OB machines, you want, would you want to get cause yet? See that that's one thing I don't do. If, if, if it's on the list and I go to the store and it's not there, I'll check a couple of other stores within

reason. Oh, right. You know, I'll go to a couple of other places just to see if I can find. Well, that's more dedication than I expect. God, if you, if you, if it doesn't work out with your wife, Sibs, just saying. Like, you know, I'm free. Can you come and do my shopping for me? Sure. Sure. Why not? I can do it. I'll start a service. Honestly, that's like the dream scenario. I don't think you realize that, you know, secretly maybe this is one of your, you don't realize, one of the things that makes you a catch. Maybe one of the reasons you're still together. Maybe.

Yeah, possibly. That you actually go through and get everything on that list. I try to. I am terrible. I'm terrible. It doesn't always happen, but I will make an effort. I get asked to pick something up on the way home, I forget all the time. But fortunately I live right in the center of town.

So my partner can just go down and get it. So you forget and your partner goes and gets it? Well usually yeah. That's shocking. Or something like that. I love shopping. I love shopping for food. I love shopping locally. I love going into London and shopping. I love it. It's really fun. I think I'd probably enjoy shopping more if I lived in London or somewhere exciting.

But where I live is not that exciting. I'd probably enjoy shopping more if I lived in London or somewhere exciting, but where I live is not that exciting. A hundred percent, I'm like, do a bigger card order, fill up the fridge than the cupboard with like jars and pouches. I like when the fridge and the cupboard is full though. I do like that. I like seeing, oh yeah, look at all this stuff, you know, like it. But actually going out and thinking of stuff to get, or whatever, I don't know.

Well, so my partner recently told a story to some of her friends, which they all laughed at me about, okay? Right. LAUGHED AT YOU! And I didn't think it was laughable, but maybe I'm wrong. Maybe this is a very lewd story. No, let's hear it! This is how she would tell the story. So I offhandedly mentioned one time that I like this specific brand of cookies.

Okay. Right. Is it Maryland, the like chocolate chip ones that come in like a little red package? Like kind of, yeah. She's like gluten free. So it's hard to find stuff that she actually likes. Right. So she less so now. Oh, you mean like gluten free. So it's hard to find stuff that she actually likes. Right. So she... Less so now. Oh, you mean that she likes. But I think in terms of like availability of products,

it's never been better. Like there's whole sections for gluten free now. Can I just make a quick request? Please never invite me to your flat for dinner. A gluten free vegan dinner. I think I would just throw myself out of a window. Honestly, I'll send you a picture of a roast. No, I don't want a picture. I do not want it. You'll be surprised.

Oh, I will not be surprised. I would be surprised if what you present on a plate is edible, because I can't imagine how few ingredients are available to you with all these restrictions. I mean, obviously it's not your partner's fault. It's not even that ridiculous. You can eat most veg, right? I can eat all Thai food, all Chinese food, all Japanese food, basically, apart from sushi with vegetables in, which is fine.

I can eat tons and tons of things. And so we have a really varied diet that it just doesn't involve. It's like, I can eat half of things you eat that just don't have me in. It's fine. You couldn't eat any of the stuff I eat. Well, I guess you're, I'm not Gordon Ramsey. So you couldn't eat it because it's got animal products in. It's fine. She's fine. We're both fine. We're very healthy. Here's we've ever been. Here's a recipe for people out there that like sausages. Just hear me out. You could chuck a fucking tofu sausage or whatever you animals eat.

You could toss in there if you wanted. This was the easiest midweek meal I think I've ever done. And it was fucking delicious. You get a broccoli. You get a broccoli. You get a bag of gnocchi. You get sausages. Take the skins off the sausages.

Make the sausage meat into little meatballs. Put the gnocchi. get sausages take the skins off the sausages make the sausage meat into little meatballs Put the gnocchi put the sausages cut up the broccoli put that in a pan like an oven dish olive oil all over Salt and pepper all over smooth shit around a bit in the and garlic loads of garlic Bosh in the oven 25 minutes. I take it out amazing fucking amazing I think that gnocchi goes like little potatoes like they're gnocchi But it's light when you just bake them it literally just comes out like a tiny roast potato. And it's fucking incredible. I'd never done oven baked gnocchi before. I hadn't heard of it.

Gnocchi. Gnocchi. Gnocchi. How do you say it? Anyway, I say it like that. Gnocchi. Gnocchi. Like I'm like a bit Russian. Gnocchi. You put gnocchi, broccoli and sausage in a, cook in oven for 25 minutes and take out in

this delicious midweek meal. Very simple. Very simple for all family. I would say gnocchi. I would say gnocchi. Gnocchi is my favorite thing to put in sausage, broccoli, put in pen. 25 minutes, my friend. Very simple. Very, very, very, very, very, very, very simple.

Talking of food. Talking of food. No, I haven't finished yet. Oh, shut up. Let me finish this story. Oh, we're trying to read emails. I've got 10 open on my desktop and you're talking about dinner. Can we read some emails?

I haven't got, I've, can you give me like fucking 10 seconds? You've been yapping for 10 minutes. We're nearly 20 minutes into the podcast. I've read two emails. What is this podcast? It's five. He's got a quota. He wants to hit his numbers for the month.

Geez. Long story short, I bought, um, I, I, these biscuits are, she couldn't find them. So I went and bought 48 packs of them. Cause like, that was the only thing I could find from the manufacturer. I bought a box of them. 48 packs of cookies? Yes. Goot and free. Yes. And I thought I could, you know, we'd get through them over time.

Well, listen, I thought it was a romantic gesture, but it turns out it's just some sort of weird, embarrassing large amounts of cookies. Last year, um, last year before Easter, we bought a bag of 50, sorry, bag, a box of 50 cream eggs. Let me tell you, it was a mistake and I regret it because I don't, I kind of like cream eggs, you know, I like them enough, but getting through 50 was, was, uh, was, was too much. Like even with a family of five, everybody was sick of them. But guess what we did this year? We bought another box. I don't know why we did it. A 50? Why do we keep doing this to ourselves? It's just... I got so many cream eggs now. You're an Alley Cat. Why do we keep doing this?

Hold on. Now hold on 50. I am an Alley Cat. I can't help it. I'm crazy. I love cream eggs. I just love the cream. I just love the cream. This is an email that says March 23rd marks the ninth birthday of the podcast. Wow. Okay. Episode one. Yeah. In episode one, I had just 5,000 hours in Dota. Could we please get an update nine years on?

Yeah. 13,000 hours now. So wow. Oh, that's a lot of Dota. That's a lot of Dota. That's too much. Too much Dota. So we start, then we stop. You should stop.

Basically, I should stop. You should stop. You should stop. Do you still mind your business? Do you still actively play it, or not so much now? Oh yeah, I mean, not for the last couple of weeks. I'm going away later this year to do some Dota stuff. And I thought, do I want to just play Dota and then have to spend

basically a month working Dota and then come back and play? I just wanted a little bit of a break. Sure. So I've been playing football manager instead. Nice. Nice. Yeah. So, yeah, here's another email. This is from Gills, Mark Gills. Gills, Giles could be, but it's too well and he's Belgian could be Jill is first time writing in just to tell you I cringed so hard when you mentioned you cook muscles in a little bit of water I kind of get it if you're making paella but as a Belgian I feel the need to correct you here. It might surprise you to hear that Belgium is the single country that consumes the most muscles in the world. That doesn't surprise me. Even though most of them come from the Netherlands, the Dutchies don't nearly have as big of a muscle eating culture as we do.

What you should do with fresh muscles is wash them just to get rid of anything that is not a muscle. You should keep them in the water for a while and you should observe all of them closing up. Indeed, the tapping works, but it's time consuming. As an added bonus, all the muscles are filled with the most delicious muscle juice. At this point, add them to a pan with some onions and whatever veggies you like. Do not add any water. In Belgium, we like to eat them with some onions, celery, those kind of vegetables and some herbs. This results in tasty mussels with a creamy sort of mussel soup that is very flavorful. If you're making a paella, I guess you could add no veggies. The mussels will release all the water that they are holding inside and steam themselves.

Stop telling us about mussels. They'll be screaming while they do it as well. They'll be all boiled up and stuff. That's awful. Do you think they have feelings? Well, no. Gil, Giles Gilis. Thank you, Gil.

Yeah, it says, try soaking the mussels and have them release their own moisture. I'll give it a go. I'll give it a go. Thank you. There's also a follow-up. Muscle denigration. This is from Ralph. A recent triforce was very uncomplimentary about the intelligence of muscles. And as a mosque focused marine biology student and vegan, I am perfectly positioned to be offended by this. I'll take it up with Kurtzgesagt.

I'll say That's a good rant. Emote their podcast. On the subtle wit and charm of muscles, but it's a losing battle. Just be aware that mussel denigration is a slippery slope to writing off all shellfish as soulless meat chunks. You're just a small taxonomic leap to writing off their cousins, scallops. Do you want to hear about scallops?

No, but... They should be respected and envies because, and there is some scallop facts for you, they possess 200 telescope-like eyes with nine times better resolution than the piddly eyes of a snail. They can recognise and tell the difference between different predators. They can track objects with their tentacles. They frequently solve the times crossword with barely any wrong. And they identify and swim towards the safety of seagrass patches.

Okay. Thank you. Very good. Um, having that saying they have a hundred eyes with better eyesight than a snail. Nine times. It's not particularly a fucking like, uh, it's pretty cool. Mind blowing like facts. Jesus Christ.

All right, let's move on. All right. This is, this is from Luke. I thought you might find this interesting throughout the podcast. You've had many lengthy conversations about famous or infamous people. I do now know if it is because I'm, I do not know if it was because I'm from the States or because I'm about 20 years younger than all of you, but of all the names below are people that I feel like I now know. I've never seen their faces, seen their work or heard a single person

other than you guys utter their name. So these are names of people that apparently we mention quite often on the podcast. And I realize, of course- A young American has never heard of. Never heard of. Some of these might surprise you. Liz Hurley.

Fair enough name. Okay, right. I think that's insane. I mean, she's been in movies that were very big in America. But 20 years ago, I suppose. Yeah. But I mean, 20 years ago, I mean, she was in the Austin Powers movies. I mean, people still probably watch those. I think they came out in the 90s. Right.

So the previous century. And if you were 21 now, you. I guess, yeah, if you were 21 now, you've barely lived. I guess, yeah. If you're 21 now. So if you were born in like the early 2000s, you might have missed Liz Hurley, I guess. Fair enough. I get it. But now, you know better. It seems crazy to me, but I do get it. Keep an eye out. I do get it.

Keep an eye out for her. She's coming back. I'm trying to think of stuff that was popular like um, like 10, 20 years before we were born, like before I was born in 1980. So all of the sixties and the seventies, I mean, I probably listened to quite a bit of music from, uh, both of those decades. And I probably saw a lot of movies from both of those decades. Well, certainly a lot of TV shows from both of those decades. Well, certainly a lot of TV shows from both of those because they were just in massive

syndication all the time on TV when I was a kid. You know, like, you're like the Adams family, the Munsters, Gilligan's Island, all that shit like my parents used to watch because they remember it from, you know, being younger or whatever. So it's not, I still maintain, I think you should probably know who this is. I think it is a generational thing though, to some extent. And we, in the same way that like, I don't know, big movie stars of the 50s or whatever, I think the black and white

transition was a big one. I think a lot of people see that as like a different time. Like these are in black and white. And I think, I think a lot of people of our generation have never heard of the big actors of that time. Right? Like, like, um, God, you know, John Wayne, I guess, James, James Stewart. Like I think a lot of people might never have seen a James Stewart movie. And he's the most famous probably of like fifties. I guess. I don't know really who, uh, who would count as the most famous. Like Charl like, 50s? I guess, I don't know really. Who would count as the most famous? Like Charlton Heston? Marlon Brando?

I don't think Charlton Heston was ever... in all honesty, I don't think Charlton Heston's ever been considered like, a mega star actor. No. Clark Gable? Grace Kelly? So here are some... I think Marlon Brando I would say would have a lot more broader appeal and people would know him, because he was in big, big movies.

Yeah. He's always been a big fan. Well, he was younger in the 50s and he was bigger. He was still like, whereas I think some of the characters, like, I don't know, like Clark Gable is a good example. He's someone who was a huge star in the war, during the war time, right? And Gone with the Wind. Although that was made before the war. Gone with the Wind was made in 1939. So America

wasn't in the war at that point. It came out in 1939, which means it was probably made in 1938. Anyway, here are the other names. Tom Sizemore, which is fair enough, because his career basically ended about 20 years ago. Yeah, it ended in in some controversy as well. And then he died. He had a brain hemorrhage. Oh, did he? He's gone. Long gone. Tom Sizemore was an American actor died.

Oh, two years ago, March 3rd, 2023. Yeah, not that long. Let's see what he died of. Brain aneurysm. Yeah, didn't make it. Sixty one. He did a lot of drugs and I believe he did some pornos. He did some pornos. Yeah. But he was kind of I guess probably again in the 90s, he was sort of the the sidekick guy. He was in he was a character.

He was in Saving Private Ryan and he was always he always played like a, you know, a good sidekick in those movies. He was like the sergeant in end of anything. Yeah. He would be the guy who was like, come on you guys, shake your ass. Yeah. Never questioned orders. He was in so many things.

He was like, he was a real worker. Yeah. He was in a lot of stuff. He was in fucking Zizek's Road, which I saw yesterday. I didn't see. I was reading real worker. He was in a lot of stuff. He was in fucking Zizek's Road, which I saw yesterday. Which I didn't see, I was reading about yesterday. So Zizek's Road is, did you hear of this? It's the film that gained notoriety for only selling thirty dollars. Oh my god.

It had a budget of one point two million. Zizek's Z Y Z Z Y X. It was famously the worst grossing film in the entire movie history. General Zizek's. Box office is thirty dollars. That's two people! Catherine Heigl, I know, basically. Yeah. It's nonsense. But yeah, it had Tom Sizemore. I guess he, um, that's funny that I recognised that movie. Oh, so there's a reason it has that.

Well, it was only shown at one cinema. Yeah. So it was shown once a day at noon at the Highland Park Village theatre in Dallas, Texas, in one auditorium rented by the producers for a thousand dollars. The limited release was deliberate. Grillo, one of the guys, was uninterested in releasing the film domestically until it underwent foreign distribution, but the film needed to fulfill the US release obligation required by SAG for low-budget films. Those with budgets less than 2.5 million that are not for direct-to-video market. Strati had the side effect of making it, at the time, the lowest grossing film in history, as it earned just $30 at the box office from six people paying $5 each. Jesus.

That's amazing. It's opening weekend netted $20. Oh man. Oh I see because they personally refunded two tickets purchased by Sheila Moore, the film's makeup artist. We saw the film with a friend. That's fantastic. The similarly named film, Zizix, has mistakenly been cited as the lowest growing due to film similar titles.

What is a Zizek's anyway? I don't know. You'd have to ask your professor of Zizek's. Oh, it's a town in California. Oh, right. Professor of Zizek's. That's very good. I miss that. Thanks. So in addition, Greg Wallace, Alan Sugar.

OK, I get Greg Wallace and Alan Sugar are very UK-centric. They probably don't have any influence outside of the UK. Or like, Regis. Or like, either Sir and Other. Yeah, exactly. Prince Andrew. Well, fair enough. I mean, who cares about that guy.

Here's one. So, brackets, not sure if this is a real person. Jean G Tupperware. Jean Guy Tupperware. Jean Guy Tupperware. Jean Guy Tupperware is my, he's my, he's my go-to guy in Quebec. He does all the Canadian stuff. You know, he could be prime minister or he could be my, my maple syrup dealer or whatever. He doesn't, he doesn't exist.

Well, he does exist in my mind, but he's my, I think that's maybe an Ontario thing as well. Cause I, when I, when I was growing up, that was like, uh, you know, if somebody was describing somebody from Quebec or whatever, you know, if they were mad about something or wherever they'd be like, Oh yeah, I'm fucking, I guess, John G Tupperware is going to tell me what to do or whatever. Like it's just a, Oh, that's so good. It's pretty funny. Yeah. Yeah. Larry David. I'm surprised the Larry David isn't unknown guy.

Frasier crane. He doesn't know who Larry David is? No, no. Harvey Weinstein. And then these are obvious. Jimmy Savile. Fucking hell. Okay, I guess. Kim and Aggie.

Nigel Farage. Jimmy Savile is the UK Bill Cosby, I guess. Yeah, basically. Who is it? Nigel Farage? Well, fuck. I mean, you don't need to know who Nigel Farage is. I wish none of us knew who he was either.

He's a fucking idiot. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah, I mean, fair enough. The UK ones is fair enough. Those people don't, they don't track outside of the UK. We're happy to educate you, you know, and like, that you know these wonderful, colourful characters of the world.

What would, what's the equivalent of Nigel Farage in US politics? Cause he's kind of like, he's like, he is very much like a third party, but he's like a bit of a just any of those people you see at the podcast. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. So this is from Lackland. This is an Aussie email. He says, read in an Aussie accent, please. So right here we go. Cutting to the point, when I was 19 years old, I'm now 35,

I worked for VideoEasy, which is Australia's version of Blockbuster. I worked in an area of Newcastle, which had high volumes of state housing or affordable housing. Therefore we had the spectrum of customers and I thought I'd share some bizarre and funny stories. So this guy worked in Aussie Blockbuster. His three tales. Was the branding similar? I don't know.

What was the name of the place? We can't ask them questions. It's a mailbag. What do you think? I want to look at it. What was the name? Was it called Easy View or something? So I've looked it up.

It's Video Easy. The branding is completely different. Video Easy. Easy why? Like, video easy why? Easy. Video easy. Easy why? Like video easy why? Easy. Video easy. The choice is easy.

Video easy. Oh yeah, it is. Completely different. Okay, cool. A regular Russian man would usually come in with family, wife and teenage boys. One day, he returned a DVD and called me over as he exclaimed loudly, I need to talk to you about this show. I must speak.

I walk over, he hands over a DVD Dante's Cove, which I know to be an R rated basically gay porn TV show. And there is an image of two lads hugging in a very sexy way on the front cover of the DVD. The customer then says, this show. Very good. Very good. I like the rough sex. And then slaps his hand on the counter, nods and leaves. This was at 8 a.m. in the morning. I love the rough sex.

This show, very good. Very, very good show. Slams his fist on the counter. Just slaps it right down. Very good. Impressed, yes. Listen to me. Great show.

Keep it up. Great show. Keep it up. Love it. Love the gay sex. Love it. Oh man, that is funny. That's great. Maybe it is good. Maybe it's good.

He's like, I love, I like the rough sex. Like he's just, I love the idea that this guy's so confident in who he is. Yeah. He can watch a gay porno and be like, this is very good. I love to see if you showed him something like not rough. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no it. Come on, rough him up a little bit. No, no, no, this is no good. Dante's Cove 2, completely missed point of Dante's Cove 1. The whole point is rough sex. Rough, rough, rough.

Like two dogs fighting in a bag. I'm going back to one. I'm going back to the first one. Give me one again. I watch. That is great. What a great, I don't think this is actually a gay porno. I think it's actual TV show. Yeah.

Yeah. But it's like, it's, it's, it's gay as hell. I mean, I think it is. I think it is gay as hell. It's really gay. Dante's Cove is his Cove you say? I see.'s pretty gay. Dante's Cove. His Cove, you say? I see. I want to see Dante's Cove.

I want to see his... Show me your Cove. Show me your gaping Cove, Dante. I want to see gaping Cove. I want to get to the bottom. Jesus Christ. Okay, so this is another guy. Jesus Christ. Alright. Okay. So, this is another guy.

Jesus Christ. Thief steals ice cream in crotch. One day I was restocking the popcorn drinks and candy, etc. when I noticed a customer had been lingering in front of the ice cream fridge for about five minutes, which we knew was a blind spot in our cameras. And then this man began to crinkle. I realised he was stuffing Cornettos down his crotch. Instead of confronting him, I just began to stack boxes of products around him and proceeded to chat with him. He was very short and then explained he needed to leave. However, I was

overly polite and kept leading the conversation. Basically, I kept casually talking to him for another five minutes or so in the hope that either his cock would freeze or the cornettos would melt. That is hilarious. Looks like some bizarre, bizarre punishment. If you work somewhere and you saw someone shoplift and they ran out of the store, would you chase after them? No, fuck no. No, me too. I would never fucking do it. I would just pretend like I just didn't see

them. I just would not get involved. I'm not going to fucking get stabbed for stopping some guy nicking a bag of crisps. It gives a shit. It's not my money. If it was my shop and that was my stuff, I'd probably be a lot more pissed off. I'll help him. The cops will come along and say, which way did he go? And I'll go, that way. I'll point the wrong way. Good on you, Cornetto thief. Get out there. Yeah. Fuck you, easy video. Stick it to the man. Anyway.

And then list of things that have been returned in DVD cases. A turd, used dirty panties, three small cockroaches, living, a used tampon, a $5 note, a phone number, a complete wrong DVD, possibly cooking oil and butter smeared in stye and a used or staged used condom. We did not test it. No. Yeah. Sorry to hear that. We didn't like, we didn't slurp a bit out just to see, just to test.

I think those, that does sound like crap. What a waste of perfectly good cum probably. I think those that does sound like trash doesn't it? What a waste of perfectly good cum probably. Opening those DVD cases must have been like just opening a mystery box of gruesomeness. Oh my god. I used to work at Blockbuster, but back in my day, I mean, I worked at Blockbuster before DVDs were even out. So we were still, you know, be kind rewind,

which is pretty good. But there you go. This Mother's Day is coming up and the number one thing your mom wants is probably a phone call. So definitely give a ring. But also you could check out the digital photo frames from Aura. I have given one to my mother and every time I go away or take any pictures, I upload them to her frame and I almost inevitably get a little text back saying, oh, enjoyed seeing you doing that thing you were doing. It's really nice. I recommend, I've got my family have one in their living room. It's really cute and they have figured out how to use it very capably. It's very easy to download the app and

get it working and they've been uploading other pictures to it which is really nice. I've actually got one in my flat now as well and so they can upload pictures to me. It's just great. Why don't you scan all of your childhood pictures from the 80s and then upload them to your mom's ore frame so that she can remember just what a precious little cherub you once were as well. Oh my goodness, that's a really good idea. Thanks. My mum has one, my dad has one, and Mrs. F's parents have one. We've spread the AuraFrame seed all over the place.

We do too. Every house we know has one in it. Yeah, everyone we know. We give them an Aura, and when we go on holiday or something, pictures of the kids, bam, straight on the grandparents auras. Nice. I love our frames. I love. Well, there you go. And for a limited time, you can save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35 off plus free shipping on the Carver Mat Frame. That's AuraFrames.com with promo code Triforce. Thank you very much. A few decades ago, private citizens used to be largely that.

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It works on all devices. I use it on my computer. I recently couldn't access a video and I changed country until I could. I recommend you try it out and protect your online privacy today by visiting expressvpn.com slash triforce. That's E-X-p-r-e-s-s-vpn.com slash triforce. You can get an extra four months free. Wow. ExpressVPN.com slash triforce. On with the show. To the motherfucker with off-brand Sips and Lewis stickers on the back of their white 2007 Toyota Camry, I am certain you listened to this podcast.

I'm calling you the fuck out for sideswiping me in Cleveland, Ohio and speeding off. Wow. Somebody's got a bumper sticker of me and Lewis? Yeah, apparently. Off-brand. That's hilarious. Is he a real menace on the roads, do you think? Apparently.

He sideswiped this lad in Cleveland. Cleveland, Ohio, of all places. Why would he just have me and you though? What kind of merch have we got? He doesn't like me. Yeah. What do we do together? Tips.

Maybe it's just people that look like us. Maybe, yeah. Who looks like us? Is there like a kind of like radio shock jock duo or something? Well, I look a lot like Harrison Ford and I would say that you probably look a little bit like Jeff Goldblum. Right. When he was turned into the fly is what I was going to...

The ultimate team up. Jeff Goldblum as the fly. I'm joking. And fucking literally 90 year old Harrison Ford. No, no, no, I'm talking Harrison Ford from like the first star wars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no been kind to those three kids. I saw you in November. What are you talking about? Fucking hell.

Well, you know, you get ground down by being a dad, you know, it's the age. Yeah. I wasn't wearing shorts at the time, but now I'm my full shorts. It's, it's warm enough. So I've aged a little bit. Oh, guess, get this right. Um, my eldest came to me the other day and wanting to raise money for, uh, our trip to Japan, um, to, to, you Japan to be able to buy shit over there. They've been going through various things in the house that they think they might be

able to sell. How small is she? Would she fit in like a tunnel system, like a small tunnel system or a crawl space? Who? Your daughter. I got some work for her if she wants some money. If she'll fit. Right.

I see. Like definitely smaller. Yeah. I don't want to put my own kids in there. It might get hurt. Does your daughter think she can fit in my wall? We got some exorcisms that need to be done in there. I think there's some phantoms living in my walls.

No, sorry. Sorry. So she's trying to that's, that's sweet. Actually trying to raise money for your trip to Japan. Okay. Sorry. Yeah, but no. So that she can buy crap over. Right. Yeah.. Yeah. There's a lot of crap to buy over there. It turns out. Oh yeah. Um, my old PS four, which I hadn't used in fucking since red dead redemption two came out. That was the last time I used it. Yeah. I never fired up. I just literally, it's just sitting there collecting dust. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, we took that. So imagine you, we went to CEX, not cash. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, we took that. So imagine you, we went to CEX, not cash. Okay. Yeah.

Which is the nerds version of cash. Um, so I want you to try and guess how much I got for a PS four with a power lead, one controller and an HDMI cable. 30 quid. Lewis. Uh, I'd say... 60. It was 77 pounds.

Wow. Okay, that's more than I thought it would be. I was actually surprised. They're selling that for 200. It's fucking stupid. It's mad, right? Who's buying a PS4 now for that much money? I was just shocked.

Because if they're buying it for 70, I wouldn't pay 77 for a new PS4. This is a years old, dusty as hell PS4 that we just cleaned up a bit and they were like 77 quid, that's what it says in the book. How the fuck is CX making money on that? Blew my mind. Anyway. I think there's a cycle though, isn't there? I think if you... certain things don't drop below a certain value over time, right?

You can still buy Super Nintendo's Nintendo 64s and stuff, but, you know, like they're almost a little bit valuable. Those are now, they're older, but PS4 is... Like, the previous gen consoles are always worth, like, nothing. They'll be worth more in years to come, but it's never worth it. You're talking like 20, 30 years. And for it to be worth like 150 instead of 77, who cares? Mason- I mean, the ones that were like, with the games were on cartridges or discs, right? And were completely internet, not internet connected, didn't require any of this online authentication or any of this stuff are, I guess, they're like a pinball machine.

As long as they keep going, they keep going. Great. But I wonder if the PS4 will turn into a brick eventually once some sort of service shuts down for it and it just doesn't function. I think they're still fairly used though, right? I don't think everybody who had a PS4 now has a PS5. I think some people still use a PS4, but there'll come a time where they will just have to get a PS5. Is PlayStation the one which is fully backwards compatible? You can run every older PlayStation game on every newer one. I don't know if I have a fully, but it's generally fairly backwards compatible, yeah. You can

play your PlayStation 4 games on PlayStation 5, for example. But do they even have, does PlayStation 5 even have like a fucking CD tray or anything? Yeah, you can get them with or without. I just assumed that they phased that out. Along with like everything else. I assumed like you go and buy a new phone and the only connector it has is like the charger connector. And the same thing with laptops and everything.

Fucking nothing has any kind of way to... Everything has to be wireless or Bluetooth now. Or WiFi or whatever. Yeah. No, I mean, you can still get PlayStations with this. With a disk drive. For some reason I don't have a PlayStation 5. Or I just assume the next one will be...

You'll probably get one soon, I guess, for GTA 6, right? A white rectangle with absolutely nothing. It'll be like a colourless, wide rectangle. And you'll have to touch a bit of it and it'll say boop boop and then it'll appear on your fucking phone. It'll be like you've scanned this QR code with your phone and it will connect to your wifi and it will all be like, oh, that's where it's going, right? I think that's where the suits want it to go. So they want it to be as futuristic as possible. Hey, listen, speaking of futuristic, I watched The Apprentice last night and it was the shopping network task, you know, where they have to sell live on TV.

No. Nope. And anyway, so they had to sell live on, you know, like QV, whatever it's called, QVC. QVC. QVC. Sure. on, you know, like QV, whatever it's called, it's a QVC. And one of the teams picked a coffee maker that you can link up to your Alexa. And so they're like, Alexa, make me a coffee. Didn't work like four times.

Like it finally worked. It was really good. It was great. Well, I have an email from a listener here, says, I am writing to you because I started watching The Apprentice this week and realized that I actually worked two shifts for Keir from the newest series. He's gone. A couple of years ago.

He got fired. He's already gone from the show. Yeah. Well, good. He got fired. Because he ran or runs a telemarketing company based in Leeds called Parallel Partnerships, that targets mainly old people and pressures them into booking a solar panel salesman to come and give them a quote and hard sell them on brand new solar panels.

Oh, right. Yikes. This lad basically turned up and it was like miserable. People tell him to fuck off, slamming the phone down. And it was just like an absolute obvious bullshit scam. And the lad quit. Wow. So yeah, there you go. And he lad quit. So, yeah. There you go.

And he was on the apprentice. Yeah. And Keir apparently was, he was expecting him to be a bit of an arseholed telly, but he doesn't seem a bad guy, but his business made money confusing and tricking elderly people. Aww. So, yeah, I'm glad Keir's gone. A typical scumbag.

Yeah. Oh, and a very, a very quick correction from, from Yuri. Thought I'd drop a line to correct the mistake you guys made repeatedly on the show. Jordi LaForge did indeed fall in love on the holodeck, but it was with a hologram version of the woman who designed the enterprise's engines, not Deanna Troi. There was one with Deanna Troi though. That was Barkley. That was Barkley indeed. He was Barclay indeed. He

creates it as an interface to help him fix the engines and tells the computer to use all the information it has available to create an accurate representation he falls in love with. The person you guys are thinking of is Barclay played by Dwight Schultz of A-Team fame, who simulates various people on the holiday, including Deanna Troy, who he impresses by beating a buffoonish Hollow Riker in a sword duel. Right, yes. So, yes, you are correct. It's basically a very prescient and scary idea of having, like, AI porn of someone that you know. It's kind of... Yeah, like, some of these things are actually quite... They can't be too explicit with the

old Star Trek. You know, family shows. I mean, this is... this was on in like 1990... But certainly, it's implied. Yeah. You know, there's certainly an idea there behind the bubbling away that this could be very creepy and dystopian. Very black mirror.

I mean, I'm not kidding. As the lad says in the tail end of the email, if I had access to a holodeck, and it was as realistic as the one on TNG is portrayed, I'd be fucking all kinds of people. Why wouldn't you? Well, but then you, then what, but again, like what happens when people find out about your holodeck history? Yeah. I kill myself.

What if they walked in and you were just constantly fucking yourself? Like, uh, that'd be weird. Oh my God. I mean, I, you know, I'd be, I'd have sex with, with, with, with Liz Hurley, prime era Liz Hurley. Why not? Yeah. I mean, it's just a virtual.

It's not even know who she was. So it's fine. Is that Greg Wallace, you could say. Oh man. This is Ryan, who has anosmia, which we spoke about on a previous episode. Which is the Gordon Ramsay bingo. Anosmia, if anyone doesn't know, is that you can't smell things. Right. So, why do I have it? There are a few potential reasons why I have it, but it ultimately comes down to me suffering a head injury when I was a toddler or a baby. I wasn't abused. Toddlers

sometimes just hit the head on things. It was only until I was in late high school that I fully realized I couldn't smell. And when I went to university, I finally got it checked out. For the most part, life is normal for me. It's sadly not like a superpower, sorry, Lewis, but more like a part of the world that is closed off, like how blindness closes the visible parts of the world down for blind people. Yeah. Some downsides. I don't know if I smell, so I shower every few days just in case. I don't know if food has gone off, so I'm extra cautious around that. You can't smell if somebody's been smoking weed in your neighborhood.

Right. I would throw whatever was left away the day after the use by date. It's wasteful, but it's safer than drinking off milk, which he's done plenty of times. Very cautious with smell. So if someone's coming over, lights a bunch of scented candles, even though apparently the place doesn't smell, you know, Ryan doesn't know. What do things taste like? It's limited, but I do have some taste. I can tell if something is sweet, spicy, salty, sour, or umami, but beyond that I'm clueless. Lemons and limes taste exactly the same to me. I didn't realise there were other flavours to Nando's spicy dip till a friend told me that there were.

I just thought it was spicy. So yeah, just doesn't smell bad smells, but sometimes wants to smell bad smells, and that in fact not being able to is itself a hindrance. Thank you. So you've never smelled a fart before? Apparently not. Geez. Lucky. Well, maybe not actually. So you're saying it's not a superpower, but you've never smelled a fart. I don't know. I think it depends on where you live, right? If you live in the fucking city center, then

oh my God, having like the fucking not being able to stink, smell all the, I don't know, some cities really stink. Is that what you're gonna say? Poor people. Oh my god, you can't say that. Well, I was gonna say that the drains. Oh, the drains. Yes, there's drains. I walk around with a poosie under my nose.

It's just another code word for poor people receiving benefits. I wish we would flush them all. Flush the drains. Flush the turds away, you know what I mean. Get the the drain flush the turds away. You know what I mean. Get the hose. Get the hose. This is from Alex recently through a video on Reddit where a guy claims he wouldn't sell

his dog for a hundred thousand pounds. Is it not ridiculous to take this offer no matter how much of a family member a dog is or am I out of touch? Would Sips sell Terry? And if so, what is his lowest price? I would not sell Terry, no. For a hundred grand? Someone says I'll give you a hundred grand for that Taurus. You would not sell it. It's a tough one because, I mean, on the one hand, yeah, I would love to have a hundred

grand, but on the other hand, everybody in my house would be so sad, you know? Need more things. Okay. We can't do this with this kind of information. Where is it going? Who's buying it? What are they going to do? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we need more info. Right. Because if they're going to sell them for a hundred grand, if you was going to go right in front of you with other tortoises in a tortoise sanctuary and be taken good care of and I could go visit them and stuff. Yeah. I would, I would definitely sell him. He's annoying. Right. But there's definitely like, there's qualifiers to this

thing. And also people on the one hand love animals and love their pets and are perfectly happy to, you know, and we'll do anything for them by the way. Um, and, and all the more so now, and I totally understand it, right? You know, people get attached to cuddly toys. They wouldn't sell their favorite cuddly toy for a hundred grand, let alone a living being. Yeah. They make love to them. And I think it's also the same, what informs this question is the same thing that it says, what would you, what would you do for a family member versus what would you do for a stranger? Would you die for a family member? I think a lot of people would say yes. Would you die for a stranger?

A lot of people would say no. I think it's, but you don't know them. Maybe if you got to know them, suddenly you would die for them. I think these are very difficult quantities, moral quandaries to put people in. And so I I think it's tough, right? It's certainly in different ages. People really treated pets a lot worse than they do now. And I think even today in some cultures, pets are not treated as well as they are in the West. Flax, would you sell your dog for a hundred grand? No, I don't think I could actually. Keeping birds, or like when I went to Spain and people were keeping their dogs in cages

outside I'm sure they'd be happy to sell those for a hundred grand, do you know what I mean? I mean look, I think if we did, whilst I would, again, I would love to have a hundred grand, I just feel like ultimately you would feel incredibly guilty. Yeah. And it would feel like you have been lying to yourself about your relationship with your pet. Because we all love Aggie. We really do love her. Mrs. F especially. First dog she's ever had absolutely adores her. And if I was like, I sold her for a hundred grand. Is that money really going to be giving you that much joy compared to

what my dog does? I don't think so. I think it's sort of commodifying an animal that loves you. And I think that's wrong. Yeah. It's a bit like that time, Woody Harrelson accepted the indecent proposal. Ask him how he felt. Probably not great. Yeah. Probably not great. He probably felt pretty good when they were like showering money over each other on the bed and stuff. Yeah. But then when it came to it, the indecent part feels bad. You probably felt like shit. I will just say you can have my cat. In fact,

I will pay you to take my cat. I fucking this cat is the worst cat ever. Is it like that one, the mischief one? Oh no, sadly not. If only that that's actually an interesting cat. That cat doesn't do anything. Not be at home either. It goes out to other places. So maybe not such a bad cat. Well, oh, shit. Well, maybe that cat's got a bad home line.

Maybe. No, that's why it's out. No, apparently not. Maybe it's running away. Well, look, our cat barely ever leaves the house, certainly never leaves the back garden. Won't let you pet her. Doesn't sit on anyone's lap, doesn't do anything, like not even amusing in any way shape or form. I feed her every day and I go to pet her and she just goes, oh no, don't touch me. She doesn't let anyone pet her, ever.

She's not violent. You can pick her up. Does she play with a ball of yarn? She'll play with something for like 10 seconds and then she just wanders off. The people I bought her for, the house stank of weed so badly that I assume the cat is literally brain damaged. I'm genuinely, I'm genuinely traumatized in some way. Like, you know, she's not traumatized. It could be that the people were not gentle with her previously. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. If she doesn't need it, then why should she? No, no, no. be that the people were not gentle with her previously or that she doesn't

like it. If she doesn't need it, then why should she? I think we're going to get a lot of people writing in about cat psychology here, by the way. And I'm just going to preempt it by saying, don't. Don't write in about how thoughts on why his cat's like this, how he can change it, how he can fix it. Just don't.

People love cats. How long have you had the cat? Good couple of years now. Yeah. And so, it sounds like it was a rescue, or at least an inherited cat. No, it wasn't a rescue. We bought her from... This is a couple that were relatively near us.

A house that stinks of weed? Yeah. They were a Polish couple who had two cats, and had a shitload of kittens, and sold them on a cat selling website and I popped over and bought one. Because our cat had recently died so the kids wanted a new cat so I went and bought a cat. I thought, you know, cats are cats. But this one is just shit. It's like having a very large pest.

So this cat you will sell for a hundred grand in a heartbeat. That doesn't mean he doesn't love the cat. I will give you a hundred pounds to take the cat. Oh, I don't dislike her. What's the cat called? Bonnie. Bonnie. Bonnie.

My relationship with the cat is zero. Like, I don't even bother acknowledging her. What's the point? Well, that's pretty standard. That's what a cat is, usually. I feel like that is the relationship that most people have with a cat. No, I think that's absolutely not true. You guys don't have cats, do you? No, no. You've never had a cat. I had a cat when I was small. Right. Well, that is not how most people's relationship

with their cats is right. Well, you got a bad one. That's all. One day my cat was there and the next day he went to live on a farm. Yeah's what happens. Yeah, that's what happens. I've changed my mind. All of you cat people out there, write in and tell people what he's doing wrong. I've changed my mind. Go on, go for it. Because you clearly want to say something about it, so just get it off your chest. This is an email for you. Louis doesn't know anything about cats. Which is true. Just told my wife about Louis and his bug infestation in his plants.

This is a solution. Have a fan blowing at your plants so the fungus gnats can't land to lay their eggs. What the fuck are you talking about? That's the plan Lewis, just try it. I got plants all over the place. What do you want me to put all my plants together in one place but a fan? Lewis has Lego plants as well. He has real plants and Lego plants.

I've got half... The thing is, before my partner moved in, I obviously had some sort of problem before and so I'd gotten rid of all my dead, awful useless houseplants. You know, things I'd go on holiday for two weeks and no one would come in and water them, they'd all fucking die. Do you know what I mean? I wasn't particularly careful. So I replaced all my plants with Lego plants, but now my partner's brought in all of hers and the place is full. But we have actually

got a solution to it. We've got these little yellow stickers that I've put in each plant, which is like little fly traps. Will Barron Do they say, no fungus gnats? Will Barron Is that what it says on the sticker? Jason Vale No, they're just anti-fly traps. They basically, they kill the adults. And then there's these little bacteria tablets you can put in the water that you wash them, feed them water, the water that you water them with, and the other person pouring that in.

It kills the eggs. And apparently those two, if you kill the adults and the eggs, it breaks the life cycle. And touch wood- Wow. So your apartment is basically a murder factory. Well done. Touch wood. Yeah. Like they won't keep going. Well, if I may, Lewis, that sounds like you're murdering living things. We have an email from Tom.

I've been out of control murdering these things. I've killed, I think, a thousand of them in the last week. Titled Lewis, Lewis Brindley, the hypocritical vegan. I'm writing to express my general frustration with one Lewis Brindley, professional yapper. Often Lewis uses the platform of the podcast to wax lyrical about his veganism, framing himself as an environmentalist and telling us about going to hippie events and pushing crystals into the ground and possibly up his bum. Ordinarily, I wouldn't have a problem with this. Veganism is probably a morally righteous position. I just can't be bothered to change my diet in any meaningful way to make the big jump, fair enough. No. My issue is that on occasion, Lewis will be

on a vegan tirade, railing against meat eaters like you, me and the rest of the world, then proceed to talk about how much he loves Lego, an activity meant to soothe little toddlers, a company that has dumped tons and tons of injection moulded plastic crap into the world for decades. My question is this, will Lewis consider… How do I square myself? Exactly. …not buying or building Lego until they move to a fully recyclable model as they plan

to do in 2032? Can we just talk about the green solution of having a fan on all day, by the way, on your plugs. I mean, permanently. It's such a terrible idea. But also, like, I get it. Oh my God. Like the Lego, like the waste, the plastic, like destroying the world. Holy shit. I struggle with that every day. But- It eats them up inside. It does.

I don't actually have- Like the pupa of the fungus. Like the, when you buy a thousand pounds worth of Lego, right. It's about the size of a quarter of a plastic chair. Do you know what I mean? If you buy a set of lawn furniture, uh, and stick it outside or throw it in the bin. I think that's actually a lot worse. It might be recycled in some way. And I know Lego trying to do their Lego initiatives to make eco-friendly Lego. But actually, on the scale of things, Lego is not actually all that much plastic. So that's how I feel about Lego. I'm sure it's, I 100% agree it's bad. But actually I think you have to think

more broadly about your one-time use of things. Welcome. Right. Two final emails. Right. This, I don't know if this is true. I will let you guys judge it. Okay. I think it's unlikely. But on the off chance that it's likely, I think it's, it's, it's interesting that it's true. Um, then here we go. Uh, was, um, I'll, I'll paraphrase it on their way home, got pulled over for speeding, right? Um, had the podcast on the phone on the dashboard, you know, the way it's in that thing, paused it, but you can still see the podcast and what those two on the, on the screen. Yes. Officer walks up, goes through the formalities, looks around the inside of the vehicle, goes

back, says, all right, I'll be right back. Sit tight. About five minutes past, he comes back to the window, hands me my license and insurance card and says, I have a tiny piece. Of course, I am shocked as that is probably the strangest interaction I've ever had with a stranger, let alone a police officer. And then I looked at my radio screen. We both burst out laughing and started to chat about the podcast for 10 minutes before he sent me on my way with a warning and no ticket. If that's true, first of all, officer officer Triforce fan, you should have given that guy a ticket for speeding. Don't play favorites with any Triforce listeners.

If they're speedy, you probably got a warning though, right? You must, you must do that again. Again, Chris from Minnesota. Hey, you see me, Chris from Minnesota. I got a tiny penis, you got a gaping vagina. Let's make this happen. Let's go. Dante's Cove, baby.

I love that. But one... On the one hand, like, I agree, like, you know, people should be paid for their time. You know, if he, if he, if you know, if you do the crime, you gotta do! ALICE Don't offer me free stuff, or if you do, I'll pay you for it, do you know what I mean? But at the same time, don't get in trouble for a triforce. Don't go to prison for a triforce listener. If you've only just met, right? SEAN No, unless you're gonna email us about what it's like in prison. ALICE Yes.

SEAN Yeah. ALICE Yes. Then, by all means. SEAN Then go to prison. SEAN Alright, here's another one. This is from Patrick. I am a long time listener and British student studying abroad in France. I recently took a solo trip to Jersey because I was bored. Went there from Saint-Malo with the ferry, arrived late, only had time to get to my hotel and have a meal, maybe a few drinks before I did touristy stuff the next morning. Immediately made friends with the hotel manager, who upgraded my room and told me that next

door had a live band, which would be cool to check out. Went there, everyone was nice, made friends with loads of manager, who upgraded my room and told me that next door had a live band, which would be cool to check out. Went there, everyone was nice, made friends with loads of people and pensioners, who even bought me a couple of pints. Just want to thank the people of Jersey for a nice welcome. And being far from the stereotypical Tory tax avoiders, they all seemed like decent normal people. To be honest, it was a welcome break from French people in general. Wow.

They're fine. I mean, you get everywhere you go, you have, you know, there's degrees of people, right? But on, I'd say in a general sense, it is nice here. The people are pretty laid back. The pace of life is a lot slower. It is a decent place to live and to bring up a family, for sure. I'm glad you had a good experience. That was a sponsorship from the Jersey Tourist Board.

Yeah. Thanks to the government of Jersey for sponsoring us today on this podcast where we talked about gay porn and other interesting topics. Yeah. Yes. And also, have we got any good shout outs of stuff that we like this week? I've got a thing. Do you want to shout shoutouts of stuff that we like this week? Do you want a shoutout positive thing that you like? ALICE I've played a game this week called

Syntopia and it's fantastic. It was for a hashtag ad, I will say, but it is such a cool game. You manage hell, so you have to manage an influx of souls coming into hell and process them, and so that they can go back up to the earth, you know, reincarnated. Like Dungeon Keeper style. It's Dungeon Keeper style, yeah, but it's more like the hell aspect is like, it's not like free form. It can be, but you really want to path people into buildings so that they can get pro- so there's like a lot of logic to it, you know?

There's like little operators where you can do like, you know, if this person satisfies this criteria, put them on the A lane, if not, put them on the B lane or whatever. So you know what I mean? You can- ALICE Right, like if they're a pervert, we put them in their flames or whatever. ALICE Yeah, you can- like some of them sin too much, so they might come down as mega-glutton's and you might have to process them different to another one.

Right. Put them through the doughnut shop. I see. Yeah. And sometimes you get saints come down and they are unable to sin. And the way to break their sainthood is to make them queue in lines for a very long time. So you have to put them into these loops so that they eventually break. And then get angry.

And then when you send them back topside they're no longer saints and stuff like that. It's cool. It's really fun. It's called Syntopia. I loved it. Alright, cool. It's a good chat. Got one P-Flex?

A shout out? Yeah. Anything you like? I guess it's not gonna be your cat. No. Doesn't like this cat. No, I have no shout out? Yeah. Anything you want, anything you like? I guess it's not going to be your cat. No. Doesn't like this cat. No, I have, I have no shout out. Okay. Nothing. I want to shout out the coconut tree in Bristol. Sorry, I thought you meant the concept of the coconut tree deserves a shout out.

No, well, no, it's a restaurant. It's like a Sri Lankan curry place. They do great, great, great, great. I want to keep them going, basically, because I like going there. And they never seem to be very busy. And I'm worried they're going to shut down. Because that's, you know, that's, that's the life, isn't it? You know, you find somewhere you like, and then no one goes there. That's the day and age. Fast and loose, you know. But then it becomes too popular and the quality drops and you know, and then you stop going anyway. So it's a fucking life. It's always the way.

You need that sweet spot. The food looks jolly good. It is excellent. I'll take you next time. It's a nice looking restaurant. Well I'm down next month. I'm down next month. But only for a few days.

Oh are you? Oh good. Right, well thank you very much for listening everybody and we'll see you next time. Bye! Bye! Thank you! Bye bye bye!