Triforce! - YoGPoD 26: Your Grandad Was A Bee?

Episode Date: January 18, 2010

A bumper-packed chocolatey podcast filled with usually jammy nonsense, specially made and lovingly prepared by Simon and Lewis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please play responsibly. Hey guys, hope you are fine. Well, I announce you Tina Barrett posted today the demo of her first single called Fire, written by Ryan Laubschner, and Tina herself. Let us know what you think. Love, X, heart, full stop, Francois. Oh, wow, so what's this news in English? It's Tina Barrett's new single. Well, the demo of. Right, okay.

Well, the demo of. Right, okay. It's on her official MySpace, which serves as the Oggscast message board. Have you had a listen? Fifteen plays. New demo. Oh, no.

New single. See, we check it. It's obviously just gone up this minute. We're one of the first people. This is an exclusive, guys. You wouldn't get this kind of shit anywhere else, yo. I think we'd have to ask permission to play on the Yoggpod. Should we actually do that? Should we ask for Tina Barrett's official permission?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, do that. Send a message now. Oh, God. How do we contact her? Just, I don't know. Oh god How do we contact her? Just, I don't know Shall I just email her the Hello

We do a podcast and we'd be very interested in playing the demo of your new single on one of our episodes and then just sign it off. Simon XX. And then after that

embedded in the email is that fake nude photo that you found. Of her? Oh my god. Oh god. Oh my god. Oh god. Oh my god. I can't see what could possibly go wrong with that.

Hello, and welcome to TTTT Channel. York Porn York Porn This is the York Porn Hello Simon, how are you doing, friend? What's up, dog? Man. What? Man-dog.

Dog-man. Half-man. Half-dog. All-man. 50% man. Mostly man. Slightly dog. Man-man-dog. All-man-dog. Right, good. Good. slightly dog man man dog

all man dog right good good so how are you how are you friend have you snowed in there in London Londonium town not really there's a light dusting as though London is a Victorian sponge

and the snow is the icing sugar oh a Victorian sponge not a Victorian sponge, and the snow is the icing sugar. Oh, a Victoria sponge, not a Victorian sponge. A Victorian sponge, from Victorian ages. No, Victoria sponge. It's named after Victoria, Queen Victoria. She obviously liked her sponge. She must have done, yeah.

Whereas our Queen today enjoys a delicious, pristine Jeffa cake of a morning on a silver platter. Do you think someone brought... Victoria preferred a slice of Victoria sponge. Someone brought, like, sponge. A sponge cake to Victoria. And she was like, this is a bit dry. Could you put some jam in the middle of it? And they did that.

And Victoria sponge was born. Snap, indeed. jam in the middle of it. And they did that. And the victorious sponge was born. Snap, indeed. And she sprinkled a little bit of icing on it, much like the snow that is now dusting my front drive as well, yes. But apparently there's going to be some more snow, so we may well be stuck inside for the next few

days. We'll have to do a snow cast if we get trapped. If we get screwed over here. Yeah, that'll be something to look forward to. So, sorry, you were telling me about that movie description. Oh, yeah, an actual description that's in TV Guide magazine. The movie is Hard Target, and the description was... Man must hunt a man who hunts men.

Oh my god, is that the tagline or what? Can you imagine that being the tagline? Like, on the front of a film poster. Who's it got in it? Like, is it like some fucking guy like Sean? Man must hunt man who hunts men. Man. Man man dog. Who's that kung fu

kung fu completely nuts guy who did the train films, where he was like on a train? Steven Seagal. Yeah, Steven Seagal. Has he got him in it? He's now a police officer. Is he? Well, deputised. He's a deputised police officer.

He is a badass. And he has like Seagal vision. Right. So he's like sitting in the back seat of the cop car, because he's not allowed to drive it. Why not? Because he's only a deputy. Right. Sitting in the back.

Right. He like looks at a black, there's like a little black boy just stood out in the rain. And he's like smoking a cigarette. And suddenly it goes into cigar vision. And there's like this sound effect. And there's this weird sound effect and there's this weird visual effect that happens this kind of like bullet time or something

and it focuses on this poor little black boy smoking a fag. Like Georgie LaForge's visor when he presses the side of it and it goes like when the predator sees someone it goes

it's like cigar vision it's like that Zooms in. Like when the Predator sees someone. He goes... Yeah. It's like cigar vision. It's like that. Although actually... There's a black teenager smoking a suspicious cigarette. This poor little lad. He's just sat there. Well, not sat there. He's satting there.

He's satting there having a cigarette. Fucking hell. And Seagal knows that there's trouble He can detect it And so the car stops They get out and they question the youth They search him And they find like a crumb of drug A crumb of drug

Yeah A single solitary crumb of drug? Yeah. Oh my god. A single, solitary crumb of drug. A crumb of drug? Oh god. I hesitate to ask what kind of drug. The kind of drug that kind of breaks down into crumb. So yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Into crumb. Maybe yeah. Yeah, yeah. Into crumb! Maybe it's a Victorian sponge. Victoria sponge is a cake, but Victorian sponge, that's like street lingo for a drug. Oh, what's called that terrible drug that we thought of? Spacker. Spacker.

Oh, my God. Yeah. This poor kid, he's paid a whole badger for that crumb of drug. That crumb of spacker. That crumb of spacker. Yeah. Oh, dear. Poor boy. It's the going rate for a crumb of spacker.

It's a badger. I believe so, yeah. The correct currency. It's not a monkey, not a pony. It's a badger. But apparently it's not even Steven Seagal who's in Hard Target. Right. Jean-Claude Van Damme is the other one.

Well, that was a... We got this... We got this... We got that completely wrong. Oh well. Oh god. I'm Simon's uncle, and when I'm not running away from spiders, and farming, and cleaning up pig shit, I like listening to the Yoggpard. Pig shit? Yeah. Fuck. I like listening to the Yogpod. Pigsheet. Yeah. Fuck.

Oh my god. A doctor's son from Nottinghamshire who sent threatening emails to a pop star has been jailed for six months. Stephen Hindley, 41, showered S Club singer Tina Barrett with roses, chocolates and teddy bears. But when the messages were ignored, he began to mention threats to the band, including a potential sniper attack. Whoa, when was this news from? Now, 2003. Ah, so about, OK, quite a long time ago.

Seven years ago. Well, six and a half. So this is old news you're reading out now, but about a stalker. Well, yeah, I'm just worried the potential implications of me emailing Tina Barrett a fake nude of herself. I'm just wondering how she might take that. The last guy who did something similar went to prison for six months. I'm thinking I might have to rethink this strategy. There must be a way you can just contact people.

Why doesn't she just have a normal email address? Is it because of nutters like... that man? And me? I haven't even listened to it yet. It's got 17 plays now. You're refiring it. What the fuck is this? Someone's singing, but it isn't Tina Barrett at the start. Oh, there we are.

She sounds like Anastasia. She sounds like Anastasia. What, Tina Barrett? Or, um... Yeah, she's kind of putting on a weird voice. A weird voice? God, well, that was terrible. That was two minutes of your life you're never going to get back. I just kind of forwarded through it a bit, and then just stopped playing it.

What's wrong with it? Why, is it just not catchy,ed through it a bit and then just stopped playing it what's wrong with it? why is it just not catchy? or is it not? that's an exclusive for the Yoggpod the Tina Barrett's new single demo Fire There we go We don't have to actually Ask for permission now

That was a brilliant little That was a brilliant little rendition Oh man I'm a man And when I'm not having a pint in the pub Or working on tip building site, I listen to Yogpod. People are arguing about how you spell Yognaught. Because you were kind of thinking of it like an astronaut, so N-A-U-T.

But I kind of prefer spelling it as like naught, as in nothing. N-A-U-G-H-T. Oh, I see. So you've been spelling it differently to the way I've been doing it. Spelling it wrong, yeah. What if the Ognorts break into two factions? Like the IRA and the real IRA did. It's like the Methodists and the Protestants. It's like their religion is almost exactly the same. The original text is the same, but they have a little discrepancy

over a tiny detail of the Bible. Would you like to set the record straight here and now? Well, I think it's perfectly fine to spell the Ognor either way. N-A-U-T or N-A-U-G-H-T, I think they're both valid ways to spell Yognort. I think if you're more of a fan of Lewis, you should spell it N-A-U-T, but if you're more of a Simon person, it should be N-A-U-G-H-T. Okay, I think we'll go... We'll go with that then

as a sort of ground rule. Yeah. There we go. It's gospel now. Now it's been said by us. That's it. It's law. Ask your friends. Are you more of a Simon or a Lewis fan? Are you a

Yognaught or are you a Yognaught? Answer on a postcard to yogscast at fan. Are you a Yognaught or are you a Yognaught? I think... Answer's on a postcard to yogscast at gmail.com I do want to see more pictures of people called Dave Yognaught and stuff like this all over the world in different

places on the internet. I just want to see loads of stuff and we're going to start putting pictures, aren't we we on yogscast.com when we redo the website we'll have more blog posts I mean yes we are letters from

the yog I had a letter from someone called xboxman79 he says hi it's Simon and Lewis love the show just want to let you know that you do have an Australian fan base He says, I glanced over at it and almost burst out into laughter when I saw it was one of your podcasts. The one about the tuna and microwave bag. And this was some 40-something year old businessman.

Oh, that's a bit creepy. I've just about gotten used to the fact that it's all teenagers that listen to us. It now seems weird that a man in his 40s... Someone's... I mean, look, I'm only like eight and a bit years away From being 40 myself Yeah that's true Oh god He probably wasn't even 40 He was probably in his early 30s

And has grey in his beard Like me So he looks 10 years older It was me, that's what I'm saying He caught me Yeah I was I just thought I'd Tour Australia

Like a Yoggpod tour I'd like go into bars Do gigs I'd just stand up Yeah On the bar Or on a table And I'd just start doing

Bits that we do From the show So I'd start talking about Jaffa Cakes And stuff What do you mean bits There's no like from the show. So I'd start talking about Jaffa Cakes and stuff. What do you mean bits? We don't have any routines or anything scripted.

So I don't know what you do. It's the regular kind of things that we go over. The regular ground that we cover, yeah. Tina Barrett. The well-trod ground that is Tina, yeah. Tina Barrett. The well-trod ground is Tina Barrett. Sorry, Tina. Anyway, I tapped him on the shoulder and kind of put my hand to my head in a salute. I felt like a total idiot and said,

I am Dave! Okay? He laughed and repeated it back to me. Oh my god and then quite unexpectedly a third guy who was sitting oh come on kind of emo or did not happen this did not happen he this is too he laughed and said the same thing what the fuck see the is, it's quite believably written But it's just so ridiculous that it can't have happened Can it?

He says this is quite one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced I don't know Do you reckon this happened? I would love this to have happened I'm going to believe it I'm going to to have happened. I'm going to believe it. I'm going to believe that this happened. We're going to believe it just because it's so good. It's too good to not believe.

So the entire Yogpod fan club of Australia, basically, this is, three people, recognised one another. It was like a little convention. Did the salute. Almost. Yeah. Our first ever Australian convention. Yogg-Nor-Meads-Con. Yogg. Almost. Yeah. Our first ever Australian convention. Yog-Nor-Meat-Con. Yog-Con. Yeah.

Yog-Con. Can you imagine if we had to be on a panel, sitting behind a table in front of a load of fans and answer questions from them? The questions will be like this.

I'll be me and you be like this. You know, like... I'll be me and you be a fan. Okay, let me just get some questions. Oh, sorry, you're going to answer the questions, are you? You're going to ask the questions. Yeah. It's like we're at a yoga con. Okay, so I'm behind the desk.

I'm sitting there with my hands up on the desk in front of my... What? So I'm the fan. I hands up On the desk in front of my What? So I'm the fan I said you be the fan Okay so I'm the fan And you're me So you're me

And I'm the fan Okay Hello Simon It's really good to see you. I'm a big fan of yours. Hello. Um, my older sister really fancies you. That's a good me. That's a good me. I like that. Yeah. Um...

Hello. Uh... Yeah, I've been meaning to ask you this... Am I Australian? Yes, you're Australian. Hello! Fair do's. I've been meaning to ask you this question for some time.

I don't know what part of Australian that is. Yeah, somewhere in Australian. Australian. So you're satting around... Behind this desk with a glass of water, there's video cameras all around on me, recording this whole conference.

Are they? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it like being broadcast over the internet? It's like a live Yogscast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's being live-streamed. Okay, I've got to ask you a question. I've always been wondering Terrible

Terrible I apologise I've always been wondering Do you like Barbies That's a question Thank you for your question I love Barbies Remember That's a question. Thank you. What else? Thank you for your question. I love Barbies.

Remember you're me. I know. Me. Sorry. You're not you. Okay. Okay. The creepy voice.

That's good. That's good. Yes. I'm an enormous fan of Barbies. I have a very large collection. It's amazing. It's like you're channeling me but when i'm not being funny what would you say what would you say and then i will say it in

my in in my voice i'm a big fan of barbies um i like to cook sausages on them oh snap and that would be about it and then of, of course, everybody would, you know, there'd be like a mumble of appreciation in the audience. You know, be like, ah, yeah, yeah. Oh, what, you mean, things I, I thought you were talking about the dolls. What? No, Barbie.

It's Australian for barbecue. I thought you were talking about Barbie dolls. That's what I was going on about. Why would someone ask if I collect dolls? It's a for barbecue. I thought you were talking about Barbie dolls. That's what I was going on about. Why would someone ask if I collect dolls? That's a bit weird. That's what the Yognauts usually ask. They do usually ask. This is a disaster.

This is terrible. This is the worst YogCon I've ever been to. I shan't be going to another. I travelled here from Australia. That's literally... Here. Yes. 100 miles away.

Right. Do you want to... That's literally... Here, yes. A hundred miles away. Um, right. Do you want to, uh... Are you still being me? Or what's going on? I don't... I can't really do an impression of you. I can do a good impression of you. I can do a good Lewis.

Can you? Go on, then. Yeah. Do you want to hear this? Mm-hmm. Um, is there any line or something in particular you'd want me to say in your style? Well, you could say something like, hello and welcome to the Yoggpod. Hello and welcome to the Yoggpod!

Right, okay. I see where this is going now. I think that's one of my finest impressions of Lewis. Beep, beep, boop, boop, boop, beep, beep, boop, boop, boop. This is your iTunes speaking. Thank you for downloading Yogpod. I enjoy listening to Yogpod. Thank you. Beep, beep, boop, boop, boop.

Okay, there's a letter from someone called mark in california us he sends he says he wanted to point out that in the halloween episode simon's mother most likely got the idea of killing someone with a leg of frozen lamb remember that from a short story written by roald dahl the story is basically a woman who is at home when her husband comes home and tells her he is leaving her for someone else. She is shocked, goes to the kitchen, asking what he wants for dinner and pretending that nothing's happened

and gets a leg of lamb from the freezer, sneaks up behind him and smashes it over his head. She then puts the leg of lamb in the oven, practices something in the mirror and goes out to the local supermarket. She buys various things for dinner, smiles at the clerk, has a short friendly conversation and goes back home and is shocked to see her husband lying dead on the floor. She frantically calls the police who come to investigate. They first think of her as a suspect but she is completely distraught. She tells them that

she was at the supermarket. They call the clerk who says that she was completely normal and happy and it couldn't have been her. The leg of lamb is just about done now and she asks the policeman if they are hungry. They agree to stay for dinner and quote, look at that gash on his head. The murder weapon must have been a huge blunt object.

It must be around there somewhere as they tuck into the delicious lamb. Brilliant. So it's Roald Dahl. I thought it was Agatha Christie. So Roald Dahl has actually written this whole plot of yours already. It was my mother's.

My mother came up with that. She probably read it. She probably read it to you as a child. She might have done. It's a lovely story to read to a child. Isn't it? Mummy! Mummy! Story time! Story time! Now now Simon, you know it's too late for story time.

One story please Mummy! Oh okay then. This one is called Murder by Leg of Lamb! Oh, God! I had a lovely childhood. Lovely, yes. Oh, God. Yes. Oh, God.

Hello. I am Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II. And this, Yorkpott, is my royal appointment. Hello. Hello. Hello. One fancies a Jaffa cake. Wow. Mmm. Hello One fancies a Jaffa cake Wow Wow

Excellent Can you do one from The old man who's fallen over You say these You say these things I can't remember what that is The old man who's fallen over What the fuck How am I can't remember what that is. The old man who's fallen over.

What the fuck? How am I supposed to know what that is? It's okay, don't worry. There's an email from Sean Waldron. He says, hello. Just wanted to ask you guys what you think of the new Avatar movie, if you've seen it. So that's the first part. Have you seen Avatar yet, Simon? I haven't.

Hannah's seen it twice, hasn't she? In 3D and everything. Yeah, I saw it with my brother. We got nice seats, we had popcorn, it was great. It's a good film. How much was it? How much did it cost? About £11 each.

Oh my God. Well, that was for the nice seats, and it covered the popcorn and stuff and drinks so that was quite fine and it's quite a long film so you sort of need a bit of munchies i thought it was a visual masterpiece as everyone else thinks it's very very pretty you know very dazzling but to be brutally honest i didn't really enjoy it. I thought it was a bit like an inferior version of Dances with Wolves and there were some enormous

plot holes in it. It was just a bit silly. I found myself a bit bored with it about halfway through. But I stuck it out. I tell you what I actually really, really enjoyed watching was the Quentin Tarantino film Inglourious Bastards. Bastards. It's a brilliant film. really really enjoyed watching was the quentin tarantino film inglorious bastards

it's a brilliant film very very very funny really good really enjoyable completely unpredictable as all tarantino films are you just don't know what's going to happen and that's something i like you know i like films and stories where they have a unexpected surprise in them. I'd probably prefer that to just a drippy Avatar where you know exactly what's going to happen midway through the film. He's going to save the people and blah, blah, blah. Something that was quite interesting is that people who have watched Avatar and really gotten into it

have actually suffered from a depressive episode when they realise that it's not real, it's not happening, they're never going to be going to a planet like Pandora and live that wild life with all those wonderful sights. Oh, what the hell? And it's like the reality of the world hits them, and they get really upset. There's been, like, loads of cases of this,

and there's, like, support groups and that stupid shit. I don't know. It's pretty and it sucks you in, 3D style, but it's not really that. It's brilliant, isn't it? Have you played Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 OMG? I hate typing that because it's such a long title.

Have you played Call of Duty, the new one, Simon? I haven't, no. Of course you haven't. I've completed it. It's a brilliant, brilliant game. Master visual masterpiece. Anyway, love the videos and stuff. Blah, blah, blah. I enjoyed the podcast about

Poundland because the description of your nan is exactly the same as my nan. Her goal in life when I visit her is to waste as much money as possible in Poundland. I am Dave, exclamation mark, Yognaut. He spelled it the way you say it. Yeah. We've got this new thing the way you say it. Yeah.

We've got this new thing. We should say this. Hello to the Queen. We should say we've got this new thing. I think I'll put it in earlier. We've got this new thing. If people prefer me to Lewis, you spell the nought in Yognaut N-A-U-G-H-T. If you are a Lewis person, then you spell Yogn-Naut with N-A-U-T at the end.

Like astronaut, yeah. And that's the official word. What's your spelling come from? Why would people be spelling it like... Naut, as in zero. That's where I got it from. Oh, I see. Yogg-Naut.

Yogg-Zero. And you got it from astronaut. Yeah, that's what I thought. People who Oh, I see. Yog naught. Yog zero. And you got it from astronauts. Yeah, that's what I thought. People who ride on the yog pod. Yeah, that's what I was going with. The thing is, I like the fact that my spelling doesn't make sense. That's what I find appealing about it. And I like that I'm getting people to misspell a word that we've made up.

Yeah. Okay, thanks for that. You're welcome. Sean. Oh, right. Thanks, Sean. Say hi to the Queen. For me. Okay. Are you going to say hello to her? Oh, yeah. Hello.

Um, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. I'm an old man and I've fallen over I can't get up but it's alright because I've got me iPod and I'm listening to the Yacht Pod

oh be back oh god oh god And I'm listening to the Yoggpod. Oh, I'm back. Oh, God. Oh, God. That was pretty funny. That was very funny. I have a 94% match on OkCupid.

Really? What's her name? I don't think I should reveal that information. I don't know how... I mean, what's normal? I've got no idea what's normal on this at all. Is it normal to have really high things on... She's answered 530 questions. Which is a little bit worrying.

So this 94% match, she works for a charitable organisation. Oh, right. She's a bit of a goth. She teaches illiterate people how to read. Aww. This is, like, close to my ideal woman, apparently. It's just a bit worrying She's got strange teeth

Which is a bit odd She says she's got strange teeth That's what it says She's got huge breasts This is your ideal woman Man I think we've found love Her Mills and Boone Her Mills and Boone kind of writing

Is Anne McCaffrey. Her Mills and Boone writing? But she likes Neil Gaiman. Her kind of trashy, romantic sort of fiction of choice is Anne McCaffrey. Dragon? Yeah. Dragon Age? Oh, I can't remember.

Something? But yeah, it was basically loads of flying dragons, wasn't it? There's a match percentage, there's a friend percentage, and there's an enemy percentage from people who have answered opposite to you. So you can actually search for people. Can you sort by... By enemy.

Right. I'll look at... Shall I look at everyone in the world? By enemy. Yeah, find your worst enemy in the world. Find your nemesis. So, sorry, did you answer these questions all genuinely? More or less.

Okay, let's see. He's from Maryland. He's 29 years old. He's African American and he's 96% my enemy. Right, okay. His profile says, I am a very humble person, love to give respect to anyone,

and love having sex. So he's like the opposite of me? What the fuck? I'm not sure about that. I'm really good at, and he filled in, handling girls anywhere at any time. Ha ha ha.

This is terrible. Favourite books, movies, music and food. Porn and action movies. Hate reading. Listen to anything. The six things I could never do without. Sex. Bed.

Good foods. Sex. Sex. My car. Oh, Jesus. My car. Oh, Jesus, my car. I don't know if this guy's for real, but... They are, of course they are. I spend a lot of time thinking about how I be more successful in life.

On a typical Friday night, I am out clubbing or fucking. Oh, my god. So this guy is my worst enemy in the world. Right. Born again, 33. 31-year-old female. He's straight and single from Houston, Texas. Is she your match or your enemy?

She's an enemy. 89% my enemy. 1% friend. Self-summary. I would just like to say I am disgusted by this site And some of the things you people have written up None of you have any respect for society or religion However

My friend says this is the only way I'm going to meet any men My favourite books, movies, music and food The bible The bible is the only book I'll ever need My favourite books, movies, music and food. The Bible is the only book I'll ever need. I enjoyed The Passion of the Christ. Music is the devil's work. I like fried chicken.

Mummy, mummy. Can I listen to the Yoke Pod? Fuck off! Mami! No! So, obviously that's JK Rowling and her child. One of my worst enemies on OkCupid is SingleMom75. Cupid is single mom 75. Can you imagine we meet?

We're like on opposite sides of the street. Our eyes meet. Yeah, yeah. There's like a crash of thunder. And we just start running towards each other. And we fly in the air. And I karate kick her. And she punches me. And we get into a big scrap. Man, I would karate kick her, and she punches me,

and we get into a big scrap. Man, I would pay good money to see that. See, remember, right, bear in mind, this is a person who is almost the complete opposite to me, okay? My self-summary. I'm a kind, loving, caring, sweet, giving person. God fucking damn it. The thing is, I think when people put that in their profile, the fact they need to put that

means they're not any of those things. Clearly, if she's given the answers that are opposite to me, I mean, there's about a hundred fucking questions about is it okay for people of the same sex to marry or adopt? And I'm betting

fuck loads of people just answer no, no, no, and they're also incredibly religious and right-wing. And that makes them my worst enemy automatically. Because all the fucking questions are about that kind of shit. Yeah. I'm going to have to sign up and see how

compatible we are. Oh my god! That's a terrible, terrible idea. I've put so much personal information... I need to check my... Wouldn't it be, like, uber creepy if we were, like, a 95% match or something? We're not...

No. This is your soulmate. It's not going to happen! It's not going to happen! It's not going to happen. Just accept it. It's like you search for matches, and it comes up with, you know, happy pants Jill from, you know, she's 34 from Loughton or whatever,

and then it comes up with the next one. It says, this one was a particularly high match, so we put it down anyway. It's a man, and it's like me. Could you imagine? It.999% We thought you should let you know. And they're like this is a record! We've never had such a high score! We think it's worth you two just turning gay. Our computer algorithms have determined... The server blew up when it calculated it.

The server blew up when it calculated it. Who else have we forgotten? Can you do... You're gonna give me something ridiculous. You're gonna say, Old man with haemorrhoids who's riding a horse. And I'm gonna be like, what? Can you do that? Oh god. Hang on. See if I can... I want to make some kind of noise that sounds like I'm

on a horse. You need some coconuts or something. It's too tinny isn't it? Hang on. I'm an old man! With hemorrhoids! This is ridiculous! This is absolutely ridiculous! What am I doing? I'm hitting my fucking keyboard with a comb! It's so weird that everyone knows what their star sign is

But they don't know what blood type they are Unless they do I'm a A Oh, like you What blood type are you? I'm a yog positive Well done I think there's some weird thing that goes on in my family

Yeah, you turned out a bit weird, didn't you? Actually, no, I don't think it's some weird thing that goes on in my family. Yeah, you turned out a bit weird, didn't you? Actually, no, I don't think it's my family. It was my mum's family. Because my grandad was AB. And my nan was O. Your grandad was a B! Your grandad was a B!

What the fuck?! So if you're a quarter bee, does that make you like a hornet or something? Yeah, my mother was a wasp, and I'm a hornet. My grandfather was a bee. Fucking hell. Can you do? We've been doing a bit of thinking and we've decided it's time to end the Yoggpod. No, no, no. This is the end of the Yoggpod, you mean, this time, this week. This is the end of the episode for this week. Yeah, no. This is the end of the Yodpod, you mean, this time, this week.

This is the end of the episode for this week. Yeah, sorry. Didn't mean to give you the wrong impression. It's over. This is the end. One thing... Welcome to the end. One thing we're thinking of doing is getting t-shirts made.

So they'd be quite nice red t-shirts with the white logo on. They'd probably be quite nice red t-shirts with the white logo on they'd probably be quite good quality ones um i don't know they'd probably cost around the tenner or something so i mean if people are interested in buying a t-shirt give us a an email because we want to sort of get an idea of how many we can sell because the more people that want them the cheaper they'll be basically um so do let us know about that. That's interesting. Yogscast at gmail.com And also, if you want to continue

giving us donations to keep us going, you can also paypal yogscast at gmail.com or click the donation links on the site. If you don't want to donate money, you can help out by voting for us on Podcast Alley or leaving us a review on iTunes

if you haven't done that. That would be fantastic. Thank you very much. You summarised that nicely. Fare thee well. Merry Yogg-Nots. Until next time. Bye.

Bye-bye. This has been a production of the yogpod