TRIGGERnometry - Seann Walsh: Cancelled for a Kiss

Episode Date: April 14, 2022

Seann Walsh @seannwalsh is an acclaimed English comedian and actor. Watch Seann's brilliant comedy special on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0yzhbFHPwo - SPONSORED BY: Girlfriend Translator - a show where two 'girls who speak guy' answer internet questions from men about dating and relationships. Available on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts.    Join our exclusive TRIGGERnometry community on Locals! https://triggernometry.locals.com/ OR Support TRIGGERnometry Here: https://www.subscribestar.com/triggernometry https://www.patreon.com/triggerpod Bitcoin: bc1qm6vvhduc6s3rvy8u76sllmrfpynfv94qw8p8d5 Buy Merch Here: https://www.triggerpod.co.uk/shop/​​​ Advertise on TRIGGERnometry: [e-mail] Join the Mailing List: https://www.triggerpod.co.uk/sign-up/​​​ Find TRIGGERnometry on Social Media:  https://twitter.com/triggerpod​​​ https://www.facebook.com/triggerpod​​​ https://www.instagram.com/triggerpod​​​ About TRIGGERnometry:  Stand-up comedians Konstantin Kisin (@konstantinkisin) and Francis Foster (@francisjfoster) make sense of politics, economics, free speech, AI, drug policy and WW3 with the help of presidential advisors, renowned economists, award-winning journalists, controversial writers, leading scientists and notorious comedians. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We've just finished the Pasadoblo on Saturday night, live on television. And, you know, to millions of people. And we've got through. I'm so happy. And he says, can I have a word of you outside? And I think he's going to tell me that I've been booked for Michael McIntyre's big show of BBC One. Another huge show. So to the American viewers, like, you know, the people North America around the world,

Michael McIntyre is our Seinfeld. He is the main man, phenomenal comedian. And that's BBC One. That's prime time. That's the dream. I'm going to do stand-up comedy on Michael McIntize's big show. It's like walking out.

Thinking, how do I act surprised when he tells me? Because I think this is pretty much nailed on. And then he says, you know, 20 minutes ago, you've got a photograph went up online of you kissing Cassia outside a pub. So, then life flips. And you don't do Michael McEntice Big Show. You do trigonometry.

Hello and welcome to Trigonometry. I'm Francis Foster. I'm Constantine Kissen. And this is a show for you if you want honest conversations with fascinating people. Our brilliant guest today is a fantastic British comedian. Sean Walsh, welcome to Trignometry. Thank you very much. Thank you for having me.

I didn't know where to look when you were doing that bit. Yeah. You were talking to the camera. Yeah. What? There's some people watching. No, I know, but where do I look? Look at us, mate.

No, I know. I look at you now. But I didn't know what to do when you were looking at that. Yeah. What do people normally do when you're doing that bit? Watch you do that. Yeah. I felt uncomfortable.

Do you want to do it again? No, I really don't want to do it again. I started looking at the poster. I was like, maybe I should just look around the room. Okay, but we're fine now. We're fine now. Okay, good. Good to have you on, man.

So we've got a big international audience. So for them, you're... Hello? You've had a great mainstream career. You were in all the big comedy shows in this country, mock the week, live at the Apollo, 8 out of 10 cats. And now you're here. So you've done fucked up, my brother.

No, this is the peak. This is what we're all aiming for. So how did, so let's just, for people who don't know, you just tell a little bit about your story, you know, growing up, getting into comedy. Why I'm here. How I've ended up here. Exactly. That is exactly the question.

So got it being doing comedy now for 15 years. Always wanted to be comedian. Was doing stand-up in like the playground. as a kid, lovely Evans, all of that stuff. It's all I ever really wanted to do and I've now been doing it professionally as I say for 15 years and was very lucky, did all the big shows

and... You had a lot of early success, didn't you? I suppose I did. It's weird, you don't say that about yourself. I said it about you. You said it about me but you also don't... I think as I've gotten older, I've got a bit more comfortable with it and you can look back retrospectively and go, oh god, I think I was, what I was doing was kind of, that was quite extraordinary

for someone in their mid-20s to be doing those things. Early 20s, you always. Yeah, early mid, 20, kind of, 23. And not to keep interrupting you, but mock the week back then was very different to mock the week now. It had a way bigger audience. I remember when I did the first time I did mock the week, it went out when I was at the Edinburgh Festival. And I think I was either 23 or 24.

and I was doing what any 23, 24-year-old was doing, I was getting completely shit-faced. And when Mock the Week went out, my first ever mocked, like you say, it was the days of Frankie Boyle, I went out the night before. So I went out the night it went out, and then I was locked out. And the flat we had was on,

what's one of the main roads in Edinburgh that crosses the brick, like Nielsen Street? Yeah, Nicholson Street. The flat was in Nicholson Street. I was locked out. and I fell asleep outside the front door on Nicholson Street using bin bags as pillows and people were stepping over me to go to work.

I thought, what must they have been thinking? Like, that's the guy from Mock the Week. He's homeless. So, yes, I was very young, and I was doing those things. And then, fast forward, did strictly come dancing, which in America is dancing with the stars. And three weeks in got, three weeks quite famously got undermarked my Pasadoblo. That was one of the things that happened.

I do think we were undermarked. No, I got photographed someone very kindly photographed me and my dance partner kissing and I was in a relationship and she was married. So that was three, over three years ago now. And there was quite the... Well, you were on the front page of the... which is the biggest tabloid in this country, as far as I know, for 12 days in a row. I think it was 12 days, yeah.

What was that like just going from, because, I mean, you were nailing it. Well, you know, for the first few weeks, you know, you were doing really... I was having the time of my life. He was smashing it. And, you know, it was all, you know... Well, I think, I genuinely think we were... I mean, I know this is not why you've got me here for, but I think we were undermarked for the tango and undermarked for the Pasadoblo.

And I'm saying that. I'm putting it out there. No, it was going really, really well. It was, it was, it, look, you, you kind of, you get into comedy. I don't know what you guys got into this for, but I got into it. I wanted, I wanted to make people laugh, and I wanted to make as many people laugh as I, as I possibly could. And now I was on the biggest show on television and people seemed, you know, people seemed to, to like me and I was having fun. I was, I was dancing. I was doing this thing that no one expected me to do. It's not the kind of thing if you've seen my act or you know me. You wouldn't associate me with a show like that. But I was having the time of my life. And it was, yeah, who knows what would have happened had, or where, you know, how far that

that we would have got. And it's one of the few shows that still on television has a huge audience. So if you come across well and people like you, you're going to be touring to huge. Stop reminding me. But you've done a special about that thing So I'm kind of taking you through some of the stuff you talk about Because this was the dream, right? Yes, and then three weeks in, you know, this thing's happened. You get caught essentially in this.

Photographed. And then your agent taps you on the shoulder that goes, can we just pop outside? I've got something to tell you. You go there. And specifically, I think it kind of heightens the drama. And, you know, 95. Well, I'm joking in the show.

clear that I'm joking. But everything else is really what happened. He says, is it right, to have a word of you outside. We've just finished the Pasadoblo on Saturday night, live on television, and you know, to millions of people, and I've got through, I'm so happy.

And he says, can I have a word of you outside? And I think he's going to tell me that I've been booked for Michael McIntyre's big show, or BBC One. Another huge show. So to the American viewers, like, you know, the people, North America around the world, Michael McIntyre is our Seinfeld.

He is the main man, phenomenal comedian, and that's BBC One, that's prime time. That's the dream. I'm going to do stand-up comedy on Michael McIntyre's big show. So I'm walking out, thinking, how do I act surprised when he tells me? Because I think this is pretty much nailed on.

And then he says, as I said in the show, he says, you know, 20 minutes ago, you've got a photograph went up online of you, kissing Cassia outside a pub. So, they're life flips. And you don't do Michael McIntyre's big show. You do trigonometry. But it's nice to be able to kind of, I'll say this.

I don't know where this interview is going to go. But doing that show, the assumption people make and even have made about that show is that it was, it would seem as if it would be cathartic. And I think it was kind of cathartic on the first few goes. Yeah. You do that show, you tell your story.

And I told it, I pretty much, I think I was doing that show like, kind of like, I don't know, four months after it happened or three. I wrote it in a month. Really? I went to L.A. Wow.

And not to be showbiz. I went away because I couldn't write it here. It was, you know, I couldn't. gig here, I couldn't. Well, I know that feeling you're walking around thinking, that person has looked at me, do they know me? Like, it's, it's really uncomfortable, isn't it? It's horrific. It's really horrific. So, you're sitting on, yeah, you're sitting on the tube and someone gives you a look and it's, oh, God, they hate me. That's not, you're not going to be able to

write a show in that, in that state of mind. So I went away. But, so I came back, and it worked. People seemed to be laughing at the show, and it felt like, wow, I've, and there was this kind of self-congstrangible. How do you pronounce? Self-congratiating. Yeah. No, that wasn't it? No. Self-conglaterate.

No. Yes. It's contagious. Self-congratulatory. Okay, I was impressed with myself. But it's, it, it, it, it, it, you then had to repeat this story every night on tour. Yeah.

And then take it to Edinburgh and repeat what was at the time the most horrific thing I'd ever been through and hope that I ever go through and repeat that every night and people were laughing it was it was oh god there were periods where in Edinburgh where I was like they would laugh and there'd be a moment where I'd just turn around and I'd have my back to the crown and I would just be turning around and going and then coming back but what was so nice

about the recording is it was three years afterwards and it kind of heightened the how ludicrous the whole thing was and actually I had a lot of fun doing the show so it's really nice that the recording of the show was actually enjoyable for me I really loved doing it whereas if we had recorded

the show in the heat of it you would have had a man pretending that he wanted to be there and I didn't want to be there what's it like being in the heat of that in the eye of that media storm what does I like to pick up an edition of the sun or a copy

of the sun and your face is on the front cover with some ridiculous headline. That must have been awful. Well, I think these things are a lot more pernicious than you expect. So you kind of emotionally deteriorate. Deterate. But at the time, there's too much adrenaline. Yeah. To actually take in what's happening. You're not, you don't see the front page and go, this is awful. You can't, you can't believe what it is that you're going through. You're just, you're in shock, to be honest.

And what I thought was maybe interesting as a show was that I was now living. You know, like, you see the tabloids. I don't read the tabloids, but whenever I see the tabloids, it's usually going into a petrol station on tour, and they're out in those boxes, those weird, boxes with the clear screens. And you have a glance. You have a glance and you carry on with your life. And you never think about that thing that you've glanced at ever again. And suddenly, I was the thing that you glance at and never think about again. And yet I was going to have to

think about this every day forever. The distance between glancing at that story and being in that story was so massive that I was, I can't believe. that thing that I glance at feels like this. So when you just glance at that story, whatever it is, you're like, oh my God, that person's, that person's whole life has collapsed. And it's just something that I go, and now I'm being that.

And I thought that maybe, I was like, do people know that that story they're glancing at is like, is the destruction of someone's life? Do they know that? And I thought, they probably don't, because I didn't. And I thought that's what, and I thought maybe that will be the show. I'll kind of go, because not, you know, it doesn't normally, it's not normally a stand-up comedian that's center to those stories. So I strangely, I kind of uniquely have an opportunity

to kind of tell this story, which most people, if you were a singer, all right, you might write a song, but you're not going to be able to capture that nuance and that kind of, perhaps that trauma in a song in three minutes. but I'll have an hour to kind of demonstrate what this was like. It was just, it was a kind of outer body experience. I don't, you're looking at the, it was the, you know, you've got the physical paper itself, which I didn't really ever see, by the way. I saw the first one on that Sunday.

I did see that when I popped into a shop. But after that, I never really saw the front, it was all on the, it was all on the internet. And it was just... Were you able to switch off because I had something on a smaller scale but like I know your phone is filled up with fucking journalists going, oh, can we get...

And messages and Twitter is going mental and all of that. Were you able to switch off from that or was that? No. No, no, no, no. No, it would... It would just... It would just...

I mean, you know, I'm much... Obviously, it's been three years. I'm much better than I was. But, I mean, it was, I'd been kind of traumatized by the whole thing. It was all I thought about on just a constant basis. Like, we'd be talking, and then maybe if you left and I was on my own, it would just go back to that. And I would relive all of the tweets,

and I would relive all of the things that people had said about me. And it just echoed. It couldn't sleep at night. It would just be there. By the way, I should say, sometimes when I end up talking about this publicly, the response to it a lot of the time, unfortunately, is, look at him, he's now playing the victim.

I'm not playing the victim. I'm just, I'm being asked a question of what it was like, I'm telling you what the punishment felt like. And there'll be people that go, good. I've had people say good, I'm glad you went through that. And fine, you know, whatever. But I'm just, I'm not, I have to be clear, clear. I'm not, it's very important, I'm not looking for sympathy. You've got to, you've got to

enter a place in your life where you've got to try and not care about what people, you have, so hard, especially with what we do, because you're trying to go on stage and you want people to like what you, laugh and like you and have a good time. You know, like I say in the show, what happened was the opposite of what I was looking for. I didn't want people to, to hate me. So, what it's done is it's kind of made me try and build this wall, which I'm not doing very well, of not caring what people think, so I'm not looking for anyone's sympathy. You know, I've got to not care what they think,

which is hard. It's really hard because you just want people. I mean, I don't know. The problem is I'm now at the stage of my life where I know, you know, I mainly know comedians, I'm that guy. And so we are actually we've got a thing where we want to go up and be liked. It's really odd and quite friendly, mental. But I don't know if, you know, that would apply to someone that didn't do comedy. You go, I think people just want it to be liked, don't they?

Yeah, of course we do. It's lovely. It's really nice. You know, night people go, I like you. I like you. It's great. It's lovely. You know, it happens less and less.

We don't get that much. I'm so sorry. We knew what we were getting into. But let me ask you this, because look, my wife and I met when we were 18, been together since. So I am exactly the sort of person that would judge you for what happened. Yes, right? But you joke about it in the show.

You say, look, guys, it's been three years, and I think I can say this, you overreacted. And it's presented in a beautiful joke and it's funny. Thank you. And I would say even the type of person that would normally. will he judge you? I mean, the reaction to what happened wasn't and this isn't, again, this isn't about making you play

the victim. No, yeah. But it was absurd, wasn't it? Look at the prime minister of this country. Right? The prime minister, an elected politician, keeps cheating on his wives and whatever. And he's the prime minister. Yeah. Can you say that? Will that have to get cut?

No, no. Yeah, we're fine. And here's a comedian. Yeah. Look, it's not morally the right thing to do. But was that the proportionate response to what happened? Well, like, the thing is, is, you know, obviously I went through it. So I'm going to, I'm going that. Yeah, totally.

There's a bit of bias here. Yeah. No, in terms of what, I think in terms of what, I think in terms of what the tabloids decided to write, you're, you know, you sign a contract, don't you, with the devil is you, you go, I'm going to go on the biggest show on, on television. And it's, you know, it's kind of, it's a family show, isn't it? I mean, obviously, you know, we didn't do that on the show. That would have been, it was outside of, I mean, that would have, yes, that, yeah. Think of the ratings. But, you know, outside of the show.

And there was a photo as well, you know, everyone says about, you know, people have done this before and people have done worse. But they didn't have a photo. You know, can you imagine what these journalists... It's like the Matt Hancock thing. There was a video. Yeah.

And so that makes it that much... In a corridor. CCTV, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah. That makes it that much worse, the little ass grab and all that. You know, it adds, it adds flavor. Hang on, did I do it? No, no, he did that.

Oh, actually, we have a photo of Sean. Don't make me. We have the photo here. Oh, my God. Just get it up on the desk. Oh, no. I've never thought about that, but the photo you think is part of why it went as big as it did. Right.

No, of course. Right. Of course. Honestly, by the way, this isn't a kind of change of heart. This is the tabloids, what you have to realize is, although I had done all these stand-up shows, I don't think the public, you know, I wasn't a kind of BBC One face.

The public didn't really know who I was. They might say they knew my name, they knew the girl, the guy with the long hair and the nasally voice, the really irritating voice. who sounds like he smoked 40 a day, him. Like, they didn't actually know who I was. So what you do then is your whole personality and your whole identity is up for grabs.

Because anyone can write anything about you because this is now how the public are going to find out about you. They've got no preconception. They can't go, I don't know about that. I don't reckon he's like that. I watched him on a documentary. And he kind of seemed like a nice guy.

You know the way you have a familiarity with, say, Anton Dek, for example? You've got that warm Saturday. You feel like you know them. So if something is written about them, you kind of got this judgment that you can make about the person. I don't know. I'm not sure I buy that. The only information you were getting about me as a person, as a human being, was through what was being written about me.

So what are people expected to do? If they, this guy has cheated on his girlfriend, he's kissed his dance partner, his photograph. And then every article is about how much of a country is. Well, there was no, there was no opposing, there was no opposition to that. What am I meant to do? Am I meant to come out and tweet, no, hang on.

Sorry, I know I did that, but actually I'm a nice guy. I can't do that. And there was going to be no journalist that was going to do that for me. So the tabloids are running that story. If you get caught kissing your dance partner, this is what will happen. So we can talk about it was blown out of proportion. But I was on the biggest show. And with all the things going on in the world,

how comes that you're on the front page for 12 days doing this? Well, because it's celebrity culture. this is what people find interesting, maybe not you and I. But this is what people are seemingly, evidently, I'm into. We're into people's private lives. And is there anything more fun than reading about how much of a cunt someone is? Absolutely not. So people are going like, look, he's a cun.

Look, read it, look. There's a photo. There's a photo. I mean a cunt. And every photo, I mean, they did, you know, they did manipulate my personality a lot. And they kind of did, you know, they really went, they really zoned in on the alcohol,

which I felt at the time I felt was unfair. But, you know, I did, I bloody loved a drink. I'm not drank now at a long time. But I did love a drink. But they would just get pictures of me, like, you know, just sat outside a cafe. and then they would, they would kind of get that snapshot of when you're, you're blinking. So then the shot is just this.

With a pint. Yeah, with a pint. So it just looked, every photo I looked absolutely hammered. And I wasn't. And I wasn't really doing it. I think that, you know, anyone in my kind of position or age would, you know, I went out and I had too much of a good time, that's, that's for sure. But I don't, it wasn't.

the table, it wasn't the tablo, it wasn't the tap, believe it or not, it wasn't really, yes, I felt like I was being attacked, naturally, you're getting, you know, everyone keeps writing about, you know, it's so fucking terrifying if you've never been for anything like it. It was more, I think probably what Hurtmore was, just everyone, not everyone, but it felt like, I felt like there wasn't much. I want to say, not defense of me, but just... Was it a loss of control you felt, Sean, in that we all cultivate our image, do you know what I mean?

Yeah, totally. Yeah, so we cultivate our image. Especially comics. Yeah. You know, we go out and you've got the allotted time to go, this is what I'm like, and yeah, I completely lost that control, and everyone else was deciding who I was. Yeah, it was absolutely that, I suppose, that strange.

loss of control. Because you do have a control in real life when you meet people. There's an element of control that you have. If you want, I want this, I want to get on with this person. I will, and maybe not necessarily consciously, but I will be this version of myself. If you don't like someone, you know, I tell you now, you could meet too, you can meet, I always think, someone was saying to me, I worked, I worked on a sitcom with Jack D, it was wonderful, it was like dream come true stuff. I was in Jack D's sitcom. And I was recently with someone on it.

And he was, it was so nice. He was talking about, you know, how enthusiastic I was. And kind of saying how nice it was to work with me. And I all had an amazing time. I had such, I was in such a good place. I was in Jack D's sitcom. I mean, that is the dream.

And then I thought, oh, that's so weird because, and I said to him, no, no, no, I'm not, it's really funny. You keep saying how cheerful I am. I'm not cheerful. I was having a good... You got cheerful me because I was having a great time.

I'd go, you could talk to someone that worked with a thing where I wasn't enjoying myself. Yeah. You'd be talking about two completely different human beings. You'd be going,

there's no, I know, Sean, there's nothing like that. There are different shapes and sizes to all of us. So it was so strange to just completely lose like you say, all of that. Hey, Constantine.

Do you like shopping? No. In Russia you skin bare with your bare hands and wear it. Obviously this is for men only. Women and small children are allowed to use knife. Where did you get your blazer from? It's made out of bear. Babushka created it for me using nothing but her own bare hands. No pun intended.

I wondered what the smell was. But for those of you who do want an easy, no hassle solution to the grind of going shopping, then Stitch Fix is for you. Stitch Fix is a service for both men and women and make shopping for clothes easy. To get started, go to stitchfix.com.ukuk forward slash trigger to set up your profile. They'll deliver clothes chosen just for you. In your taste, size and budget. And by taste, they mean something that will look good.

Instead of showing the world you're having a midlife crisis like me. The items you buy arrive at your door a few days later. You try everything on at home, decide what to keep and then send anything else back. It's so easy. You just pay £10 each time your order, which is credited towards the items you keep, and you'll get 20% off when you keep all five items. There's no subscription, plus shipping, returns and exchanges are easy and free. Stitchfix does the hard work for you, making shopping for clubs easy and hassle-free. Get started today at stitchfix.com.com.com.org.

forward slash trigger and get 20% off when you keep all five items. Can you order fresh Siberian bearskin from Stitchfix? Possibly. Go to stitchfix.com.combe, forward slash, trigger to find out. And then there was a reaction that you had, which was a physical reaction, which was the opening to the special, which is actually, I mean, you present it in a comedic manner, and it is funny, but it's also, it's fucking awful.

After that, it ended up triggering a lot of... I had a lot of panic attacks after that. Really, really bad. I had panic attacks in my early 20s, but that was mainly just chain smoking, 10 cups of black coffee a day, Jaeger bombs at night. I didn't know what caffeine did.

Yeah. And I just, in my early 20s, like having panic attacks. and then going to the doctors and him going, so how much coffee does you say? Yeah, that's 10 cups of coffee, yeah. I don't think you should be doing that. That's what's bringing on the pelagatex.

But cut to coming up of that, there was a physical reaction. It was just, I must still get them occasionally. When something in my head triggers and takes me back to it all, I just feel overwhelmed. And you have a physical kind of everything spins. you kind of collapse. It's very, it's horrific.

But, you know, I don't, I like, well, I hope that no one was, I hope that was no one's goal. That's just, that was just me being, I'm not, I'm not someone that's really built for, I think, I think, there are people, there are comedians, right, now that exist, that seem to thrive off, like, conflict on the internet, you know, that people say bad things about them and they fring off it and they go off it. Talking about me, man. Is it you? Do you get, I can't, I can't,

do you really, do you? You fry. I have a hatred. Ah, yes, someone hates me. This is fantastic. No, I just, I just go, oh God, someone hates me. This is, this is absolutely horrific. But I think it's a good point. I think so people. I never wanted to be like, John. That's the difference. What do you, are you joking? No, I never wanted to be like. What do you mean? I never wanted to be liked. I don't care if you like me. I care if what I'm saying is true or if it's funny or if it's well written. And if you don't like it.

No, no one's going to laugh at your thing if they don't like you. No, I don't think that's impossible. You can't go and what you... No, think about it in life. Forget comedy. We're at an event, we're at a gathering, someone you hate. Sat opposite at your table. Oh, true.

That person says something funny. There's no way you're laughing. That's a good correction. So what I mean... It's all about... Jack D said, back on when he did, I never forget it, I just started, and I watched Jack on Mark Lawson on BBC 4,

and Jack D said comedy is 80% likability. You're right. That never left me. You're right. Look at someone like Rob Beckett. I love Rob to bits. Look at, like, he's a brilliant comedian, but look, look, you just love him. I've been in his company.

It's just a great guy to be around, making people laugh. That's the juice. You're right. Here's where I think we're talking past each other. I think you're exactly right. No, no, no, you're exactly right. We're just having the conversation. Online, though, there's a difference because very often the things that make some people really, really like you are also...

Online, did you say? Online, right, right. ...are also the thing that makes some people really, really hate you. Okay, fair enough. So if I'm online making a joke that's articulating the point of view of 80% of the population in a funny way, and 20% of the population really, really, really hate that. Yes. That's where you end up, right?

And I have no problem with the 20% hating me if I'm articulating something in a funny way that makes people laugh and people feel that their point of view about the world is being validated by somebody who's got an audience. It is also dependent as well on the style of comedy that you do.

Yes, exactly. I talk about microwave. Yeah, yeah. I was always quite political and satirical in what I do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you're going to tackle a subject that is contentious,

that gets people head up, whatever it may be, and you tackle it, and it may be a brilliant routine, there's people going to be, oh, it's punching down, this is disgrace, well, you can't say that, you're laughing at X, Y, Z. Whereas if you're doing a brilliant routine about microwaves, you know, most people aren't going to get that reaction, although there will always be a couple. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Take issue with it. Why is he fucking talking about my time? But, see, Sean, this is why I asked you about proportionality, because one of the things we've explored on the show, as you know, people who've got cancelled for a joke or have you got cancelled for saying the wrong thing or have got... And it certainly feels to me, like, in the modern climate,

people are being... We're having disproportionate reactions to things that people say and do, right? Whereas you got 90s cancelled for, like, an old-school thing. 90s cancelled. You know, like, that's what people used to get cancelled for. Yeah. Yeah.

Well... Like, I knew, you know, I knew we were going to, we were going to brush on the topic of, of cancelled culture, but I mean... I'm not trying to lead you to any part, we just want your opinion. Oh, God, no, no, don't worry about that. No, it's fine. No, but I, the thing is, I joke, I say I'm cancelled in the show. And I think that, you know, after, after strictly come dancing, after the kiss, you... it's the entertainment business guys. You know, they've got to like you. And if everything that has been written about you

is pointing to people in the direction that, well, we don't like this guy. And I think I've always, just as a person, kind of suffered with that. I think, you know, kind of long hair looked confident, was never confident, but looked confident. And it kind of people didn't, I don't think I was, I always remember, remember being really envious of Josh Whittaker. A great comic, but, you know, that you just loved, just, you want to be in a room. People just, they just took to Josh, just warm and so, so likable, you know,

and then, and then I was there just kind of miserable and hung over and fucked off with everything. I just think that I certainly when I was younger lent myself to to being to kind of being disliked. I think I was just a kind of dislikable

person. See, I'm going to be honest for you. I don't agree with that. I tell you what it is for me. I remember when I started in comedy and you're already on the ascendancy, you were this young, good-looking guy who would come out and just

crush gigs. Just crush gigs. And then there'd be, because for the rest of us, it took us time to find out what we wanted to do. But you seem to come out fully formed. I remember Paul Rickett saying the first time I ever saw your gig, it was like your 10th gig. And he said, I don't know what is, it is, but Sean had it. I think I'd know. I think, hey, when I was started out, yeah, I could, I, there's been enough time since now and then that I think that I was, I was, I think, I, I, I think I, look, I had been studying, I'm not joking, I was, it's in the show, I was doing stand-up in the playground, I didn't do homework at school. Teachers put the homework down and

I would say it's okay, I'm going to be a film star. I wouldn't do the homework. I thought I was going to be Jim Carrey. That was my upset. I just thought, I'm going to be a comedian. I don't need to know, I mean, it's really not helped. I'm thick of shit. I know nothing, because I just, was just, all I wanted to do was be a comedian. And so when I started, people go, guys, is this only his 10th gig? No, no, no, you don't understand. This is all I thought about. Like Robin Williams talked about that. There's a few other comics. Just as 10-year-olds, they were practicing eight hours a day.

In the mirror. See this. I don't think I do this. Do I do this in the show? You watch it recently. Yeah. Where, you know that? So the eyebrows. No, I don't think you did that. No, you didn't do that. So, yeah, I think I'd cut out. We only had an hour.

I was, when I first saw Ace Ventura, I'd go into, and the mask, which I think only released in like a year apart. Doing that with the eyebrows, I would go in, so easy now, it just comes to me. I couldn't do that. As a kid, 10-year-old, in the mirror, would put both eyebrows up, hold one down, and just do this ages

so that there was just one eyebrow, and then do it with the other, and that was hours and hours in front of the mirror, training to do that with my eyebrow. So it wasn't my 10th gig. I've been in my head, I'd been doing this forever. And I would go to the Comedia,

the local comedy club in Brighton, every Sunday on my own. The bouncers begin to... the bouncers would... I would turn up, and it would be that weird kid that was coming to the club every... Yeah.

Every Sunday on his own. They just started letting me in. Yeah. They'd start I go, oh, it's you? Yeah, don't worry about it. Just walk in. But I think what happened was... This is so strange thinking back over my career. Where I did get a lot,

quite early on, a lot of television. I think it did me a lot of... And again, I sound like I'm being very ungrateful. I'm not ungrateful. It's amazing some of the things I've done. I think it was probably too much for me to handle at such a young age, and I think it destroyed a lot of my confidence.

It destroyed a lot. I sudden... I hadn't... It's so mad, right? It was just naivety. It wasn't even arrogance. It was... I suppose it was...

When you're young, I literally just thought, like, I'm, like, I'm gonna, I'll have a sitcom. I thought, I was, thought I'll have this, and then, then I started doing TV and I was way out of my death. When I'm not doing stand-up, but doing like the panel show, I didn't know what the fuck I was doing. And suddenly, the doubt comes in. And I never really doubted myself before.

And then when you first get that doubt, I don't know, I'm not just saying, because some people are going, oh, but when we were doing, when those first, three weeks of strictly, I felt like I did at the beginning of my stand-up career, and I felt like I've got it back. And I'm, this is it. And because that doubt in my, that I kind of developed in my mid-20s, that, and I think that's why I drank a lot as well. I think I really, I just suddenly, I couldn't really handle, I felt like at such a young, I'd fucking, I won't name him. because he was saying privately, but there's a friend about it.

He's not a lovely young comic. He's been going since he was a fucking, you know, 18. He's one of these guys. So he's only 25 now. I'm with him. He's talking about regret. He's talking about the mistakes he's made. And it hurts me so much.

I'm like, man, you can't, you're 25. Like, you've not made any mistakes. They're steps. Their step, come on, like, snap out. You can't. Because I was there. I was 25 fucking years of age going, I've fucked it. I've ruined it. I've completely ruined it. And it's, I just wish that I hadn't,

I wish I'd handled that better, kind of got myself up, dusting myself down. Come on. And I, I, I really, it ain't me a lot. See, a lot of people are watching this and they've seen panel shows on TV. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the thing that is created is very, very different from what actually happens. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What was it like doing that and thinking, I'm not doing well here? Oh, God, fucking it. It's just like, man, I did a show. I did a show. I had my own TV show on Comedy Central called Sean Walswold.

And it was an internet clip show. And I did this show. And it was just like, it went. This was before trolling. The phrase trolling. This is another straight. How old you? I'm 39.

You're 39, 36. 39. 39, right? So when we, how long have you been going? I did it for about five years. I haven't done it since the pandemic. Okay, wow. So we do comedy here, we write stuff.

I bet your anxieties down, isn't it? Is that nice? I'm loving it. Yeah. For me, it was the travel, actually. For me, was the travel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When the pandemic started and the lockdown came, I was like,

I loved lockdown. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah. I bet you did. Yeah. Yeah. That was lovely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sean, can I come back, though? Of course. Sorry. No, no, no, but it's great. All I was going to say, this is all my point was going to be. I don't think, I don't, I don't, I joke about being cancelled. Yeah.

I still, since, Striply, have done bits and bobs on telly. I've not been, and I tore. So I'm not being cancelled, but did it make it harder for me to get work? You lost a shit down of work. I lost a shit, a ton of work. So this is why I'm getting that. And look, from your person. That's just true.

From your mental health point of view, you got to own what you did and you got to process that and you've got to learn from that and you're going to grow from that. And I know that you've done that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm not trying to get you to say, oh, I was cancelled. I know you're not. I know you're not. I was treated so badly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I know you're not. You've got to be a man and own it because that you fucked up and then the consequences inevitably are on you. Yes. However, however, right? I'm talking about broader society, right? Mm-hmm. The broader culture. Do we want to live in a society where someone does what you did

or someone makes a bad joke or someone says the wrong thing or someone is slightly insensitive about a minority group that now we're very focused on? And then people who they've been working with for five, ten, 15 years suddenly go, oh, you know what, you're untouchable now. Is that the society that we should be living in is what I'm getting at? Okay, yeah, so, but should be living in or are, do you think we are living in that? We're definitely not living in a society where people are forgiven for mistakes they make, right?

Well, hang on, yeah. Would you disagree? Well, actually, do you know, and believe it or not, I, because I thought when I was coming on, I was like, fuck, you know, I don't, I don't think about this kind of stuff. I was going to say enough, but it's not enough, I just, I don't really have these discussions outside of this. But I would, when I hear that question, I think, forgiveness takes time. forget, you know, like, you know, you can't, if someone's done something wrong, you can't,

you can't just do something wrong and then go, we've got to forgive him, people fuck up, let's crack on. You know, I think you've got to, have we got any examples? I mean, me, for example, right? And I'm happy to do that. I've recently did Catherine Ryan's new stand-up show, just going out on Amazon.

And that wouldn't have happened. six months after Striply. No way, you go, fuck off. We're not having him on the show. Yeah. But we have time. I think people go, I think he's learned his lesson, hasn't he? And now I'm kind of slowly getting work again,

and it's really, things are going really well. I just think they take time. I don't know if anyone that's been, you know, is there an example of anyone that's done something where they haven't kind of been forgiven or let Andrew Lawrence, Alastair Williams,

Chris Maglade, I mean, I can keep going. There's a lot of people. But. Bill Cosby. There you go. There's one. But.

Louis C.K. Not defending any of these people. I know you're not defending them. No. I know you're not defending them. And Bill Cosby was a joke, to be clear, right? Yeah.

But I'm saying it for them. For them. Because there'll be someone going, he's defending Bill Cosby. Okay. But, but the other, and look, Louis C.K. But.

Does that mean his career should be ruined forever? But hang on it goes. It's like, it's not, I mean, he's released two specials that you can pay for and watch on the internet. Yeah. And I imagine he's making hundreds of thousands, if not millions of dollars off that. So, all right, like, he's laughing, isn't he? Yeah.

Well, that's a little bit different because has he still got the same career that he had before? Does he? He still sells out all those massive rooms, doesn't he? But this is what the conversation is really about for me. It's like people will say, and perhaps there's some truth to it, that if you get cancelled

and you make a big stink about it, you can benefit from it, right? People will say that. And I think if you play your cards right, that is true. That is true. You can be canceled. I'm the cancelled guy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. And that's definitely true. There's definitely an element to that. But there's also other people for whom that's really not true, who really never recover from that. And I've given you an example of a few. Now, Chris Maglade, for example,

I don't know if you know anything about him. No, I don't. He's a sort of, anyway, we won't get into it. He's a Scottish guy? He's northern, same thing. North of Watford, yeah, yeah, exactly. No, yeah, okay, I think I've heard. Yeah, so basically he had a poem in the show, which said something about the Rothschilds,

and it happened to have been a bad moment for race relations, and then he had all his shows cancelled from the theatre. And the only reason he's still even gigging, and maybe the only, he was suicidal. Yeah, I can imagine, yeah. And he got a few of our fans supporting him, and now he's got a tour, and he's coming back on the show soon to talk about it. So that's worked out for him.

But that's what's happened to him is massively disproportionate to the crime. And that's what I'm getting at, right? Yeah. Well. And Sean, again, I'm not trying to get you to say anything that you don't believe. No, I'm just, that inhale is just me trying to, is me trying to kind of form an opinion immediately. I think

it is the outrage always feels disproportionate but that's this is where we are now with social media

the the outpour is always going to be massive I mean I don't really under I don't I don't think

it's gossiping isn't it it's people that it's people gossiping, talking to strange. It's a forum. It's just a giant forum of rumors and outrage and opinions. He was removed because his shows were pulled.

I don't know. The same show that he did at that same theatre a year previously to rave reviews. Suddenly now is too problematic. Right. But look, we're going down a bit of... No, sorry, it's just because I don't... It's because I don't... It's because I don't understand, yeah, I don't really understand why that's, that's happened to him.

I don't know the story. And I, but all I can do is I can, the bit that I can identify with is how awful that must have been for him to go through. And I think, I think what's, what can be tough is, is, you know, no one, you know, you don't, you know, like, look at Jimmy. Yeah. Jimmy Car went, Jimmy made that joke. the 3,000 people in the room laughed. I mean, you know, he doesn't, if he knows, he can't tell the future, if he knows that that's going to be,

if what the reaction was going to be was going to happen, does he do that joke? Probably he probably doesn't do that joke. So it's so tough. We live in a world where you don't know what the reaction's going to be. How can you know, you know, he didn't know that was the, when Jimmy made that joke, he didn't know that was the line. That line hadn't been drawn.

So he makes the joke. And then they go, no, that, you crossed the line. It's like, fuck, the line wasn't there. The fucking line wasn't there. Fuck, I didn't know that. You told me that was the line before. I wouldn't have said it. So it's, it is tough.

May I ask one more question? Yeah, go on. So this is the brilliant point that you've made about Jimmy and the line, right? Because to me, the healthy attitude of society to comedy has always been, look, comedians are going to make mistakes all the time, right? You're going to make a joke. And we're constantly feeling where that line is. is, right? In a room. In a room. Yeah, you're live, yeah. Or when you're doing something on YouTube or

whatever like we do, right? You're constantly going, where is this line? Let's feel it out. Let's see if we can cross it. What happens here? But I feel that we've got to a position where it's like the moment you get past the line, it's no longer, oh, that was a, ooh, do you know how people used to go in a comedy club? And that was it. And you're, okay, that's a bit far. Yeah, but dude, that's the comedy club. The reason that none of this can be kind of, none of this can be, in one of a better kind of sentence, basically, is calmed down. The reason that can't happen is because it's leaving the comedy club. And it's going on to, the social woman. And it's 7am on Good Morning Britain. It's just, look, you can't, you can't resolve this. The thing you can

control is what is what happens in, in the room. Right. But you don't control that anymore, because you've got people with phones and all that shit, right? precisely. So I just, I don't, I don't think this stops. I think it just gets worse. It just, yeah, it just carries on and gets, and gets worse and you have to kind of live with it. I mean, I listen to Tommy Tiernan talking to Adam Buxton a few months ago. And then you're talking about, I think, a joke that Tommy got in trouble for about Jewish people, I think it was. I think it was. And Adam Buxton had suggested maybe that comedian, Now need to not just think about, because my, the defense would always be like, but are you listening to what I mean? Because this happens when it goes on the internet, people interpret everything. The way they just interpret things and they go, well, I think he means that, why don't you actually think about what he or she is trying to say? As opposed to your interpretation of what, what are they actually just trying to say? Right.

And then we'll just go with that because they didn't mean anyone any harm. This is what they were trying to say. But Adam Buxton was, and that's always been my kind of line. But I don't think he really meant to hurt anyone's feelings. But with Adam Buxon suggested that maybe now we need to take into account what it could be perceived as. And I thought, oh, God, that's interesting. See, by the way, this doesn't touch any of the stand-up I do.

My stand-up, you know, so this is why I don't think about it that much. Yeah. The microwave stuff doesn't get affected. Microwave stuff, what am I writing about? I've got a dog, you know, and people stop you when you have a dog, and they go, is it a boy or a girl? And you think, why, do you want to fuck it? That's why, that's all I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the issues. But, I mean, you could go then into the trans stuff from the boy or girl, but... But he doesn't. But he don't.

But he don't. No, I don't. You know, I don't know who to hear that, though. But it's because I don't think about that stuff. Yeah. But here's a point, right? What something could be perceived as. Isn't that just the death of comedy? Isn't that just you second and third and fourth guessing every piece of material that you're right? If you start to think, well, hang on, well, then that could be perceived as this,

but it could also be perceived as anything. I'm someone with anxiety. I perceive a billion different things at the same fucking time. That's why I'm crippled some of the time. You can't operate like that. Well, but the room, yeah, you see, well, I try to not think past the room I'm playing to. And the room will let you know.

Oh, yeah, yeah. But that's how always, that's all I'm saying, man, that's how it always was. You are in the room, you do a joke, the audience pulls back, you go, that was too far for this audience in this room today. And you go, okay, I'll try it again. By the way, I do, when I'm trying new stuff, I do, I didn't sometimes say things where the crowd go like, oh, would you go, oh, okay, maybe not that. Yeah, yeah, and you maybe try it again, you change the wording, you play around with it.

And eventually, if it's a shit bit or if it's too offensive, you drop it. Yeah. That's how it was. But if every time you go too far, then suddenly the world, descends upon you and ruins your life, that is going to affect your comedy, isn't it? I imagine it will, yeah. Yeah. That's all we're talking about. No, I know it is, but I know, no, I know it is.

But I think, but I think if, it's just, you have to, you know, the audience isn't one thing, the public, we call it the public, the audience, it's not one thing. They're made of individuals. And each, every time you do a room, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's. different people in that room that are going to give you a lot of the time there might be a different reaction what you're trying to do is you're trying to create a you know you're trying to create a consistency aren't you preferably going into every room and smashing every room and that's generally impossible even for the biggest and the best but you you know you each each gig is different and the audience

will they'll let you know what they're what they're up for that night and I I don't I mean, could Tommy, now does he have to think about what it might be perceived as? But I suppose your responsibility changes, doesn't it? The bigger you are, it doesn't matter what an open spot is saying. But Tommy Tien, and then what happens is this weird thing happens. There's always been the way is that if you become a huge name, suddenly you're given, like you guys with this, you know, this has grown, suddenly you're given this responsibility where people suddenly expect things.

from you. And that's just always been the way. And what's it like to have that responsibility? Does it mean that suddenly you start second guessing, third guessing? Or do you just have to be a comedian and go, look, I'm going to say what I'm going to say?

But I don't think I've ever had that. I was in the limelight, which meant it mattered what I, not mattered, but you know what I mean? What I was saying was going to be picked up. But it wasn't, it's not. not like people are generally speaking coming to me about, you know, for my opinion about everything. That's like a different. Yeah, it's a different game. That's a different level. Like, you know, like when football managers start getting asked about Russia and Ukraine.

Suddenly it's like, what? What's happening? But it's just, we've always been like that. If you get, if you become really successful, almost at anything, suddenly you're meant to have actors. I mean, they're from actors. They want actors love people, we love knowing what an actor. This guy's been an action film. Let's find out what he or she thinks about the war in Ukraine. It's just always been that way. I don't know why that is.

Yeah. Yeah. Hey, KK, do you like podcasts? No. In Russia, we don't have podcast. All we need are beautiful and true words of Uncle Vlad to guide us. And how's that working out? Not good, but still more trustworthy than BBC's Sky.

CNN, Fox News and MSNBC. Good point. But for those of you who do like a funny and informative podcast, then you've got to check out the Girlfriend Translator. The two co-hosts are women that answer all your questions. Why ask women question? Uncle Vlad says women are only four. Because it gives men objective advice on the minefield that is dating and relationships in 2022.

If you're wondering why she never called you back, why she lost interest, or simply how to become a better part, then you have to check this show out. She didn't call you back because you're not real man. You don't ride bear, we're shot off. Okay, mate, but it's not just for men. Ladies, you can listen and find out what makes men tick and an insight into male psychology.

There's only one answer to that. Plus, it's funny, and you get to ask the host questions. If you've ever had a situation in a relationship that has left you feeling confused and one an impartial point of view, then you need to check out, Check out the Girlfriend Translator. Check out Girlfriend Translator,

wherever you get your podcast. I've never listened to it because it is appropriately banned in Russia. We're all comedians and a part of being comedian. You alluded to it to it yourself in your show that you wanted to be a star, you wanted to be a star. It's embarrassing, yeah. No, but it's honest.

That's what was great about it. Because that's what we all wanted to be when we're going in, a different type of star, but a star nevertheless. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But having experienced it, was it all that it was cracked up to be? Well, as well, when you're in it, when you're... I don't, well, I certainly never viewed myself as a star,

but you were so, you know, I was on television, I was recognisable. If those three weeks, if those three weeks had run forever, yeah, would you have been... It would have been, oh, it seems like that would have been bloody lovely. Yeah. Like I say in the show, I think, Like, I was walking down the street and people are going,

good luck on Saturday. It was lovely. You go, cheers, mate, thank you. But, no, and I'll tell you what's quite funny is I, and I don't mention this in the show. I only did one gig in the time that I'd been on Strip Me. So in that three weeks, I did one gig and got to feel the reaction of the crowd.

They went nuts. Really? Man, it was what you dream of. I went out and the crowd were like, fuck it dream! And they went wild. And I was like, like I say, I felt like I had my power back.

And I... You didn't need punch lines. You didn't need punch lines. Anything you say is funny. Just flying, yeah. It was amazing. And it was like a film. I got to experience that once.

Downstairs at Top Secret. Oh, man. It's a great room. For 15 minutes. Best of the country, top secret. Yeah. And hot water. Yeah.

I'll be Liverpool, but in London, yeah, top secret. So, and Bill Murray. Shout out to the Bill Murray Comedy Club. But the, yeah, just once for 10, 15 minutes to feel that, to walk off. To become the number one villain. Yeah. For the rest of the year. But isn't that?

And that was it. I got, you go, I felt that once. Lots of places can expose you to identity theft. Oh, no. That's why LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second for threats to your identity, which is way more than anyone can do on their own. If we find anything suspicious, like new loans or changes to your financial accounts, we alert you right away. All through text, phone, email, or the LifeLock app. Get the alerts that could make all the difference.

Save up to 40% your first year at LifeLock.com slash special offer. Terms apply. That's fucking been so. That's crazy. But isn't that the quintessential celebrity experience? You go from being this hero where everyone... I had it condensed into like just three weeks, like that. Woo-hoo!

Straight down. Because you look at someone like Beckham, David Beckham. He went through the same thing where he was just like the hero, then in the 98 World Cup. Everyone hated him. And that's what happens to a load of celebrity. I wonder what that did to. Did he ever write about what that did to him?

I don't know he wrote, but I know he needed help to go through that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that was on an even bigger scale than yours, which was big, big scale. Oh, God, yeah, no, of course. But what, what, what we're saying? So, yeah, so I was just telling you, I got to feel that once. Before that, throughout my 20s, I think I'd tell you what I've learned. If you're going to go, like, you know, it's the film.

What did he learn from going full of all of that? I've learned the value of things in my life a lot more. I had no respect. I didn't value anything I had came from often poor background no money you know my dad waiting for the

money to come in loved drugs my dad and so he'd be waiting for the money to come through the cash point so they could buy his drugs and and so then at 21 years of age

you you suddenly my friends were like working on me but like Gap's just working in a in a bakery and we're getting 127 pound 50 for 20 minutes

or sometimes 149 pound 50 sometimes 200 quid like it was it was mind-blowing I had was getting paid 200 pounds to do the thing I loved whilst my mates were working eight hours in a bakery

like it It was unreal. So, but it meant that I didn't really learn the valve at such a young age. When people know, you know, in your 20s, that's when you broke, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, not me. I wasn't broke. I went from earning circuit money in your early 20s, which was a lot back then, to then doing TV, where you're earning, like, silly money, which I all spent on Uber's.

How much were you earning? I think I earned, well, we're not going to go, you know, we're talking thousands of pounds. For someone in their 20s, we're talking Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I didn't have to look at what a price of coffee was, you know, even a T-shirt, like, I just buy a T-shirt, I don't know, I just buy a T-shirt, but to not to be at that age where you're not looking at the value, you know, the value,

to not look, that's such a small thing, but I wasn't looking, that's not someone that's valuing things. No. There's no values, people that, I'll buy that. That's how I was with life. I didn't value anything. I got trapped from no money to money. So I didn't have that bit which you meant to have in your life as a student.

You then goes into work, which is, okay, there's how much I'm getting this week. I'm going to need this. I'm better put this aside. I'm going to put this, the food here. Some of my friends always lived. And I didn't, it wasn't, I just couldn't, I couldn't connect with them. I couldn't. You can't teach yourself that.

If you're, if you suddenly be given loads of money and you had none and you didn't, I didn't come from, you know, traditional family. So that wasn't really instilled in me, even if they tried. So you didn't learn the value of anything. When that's all taken away from you, so now you're not earning the big bucks because you're finding it difficult to get work. And then people, everyone thinks you're a cunt,

so they're not coming to see your shows. And that's turned around a little bit. But suddenly, you've really got to learn the value of money, French, everything. You really learn to weigh up the value of things. So when you're talking about my 20s, what was it like? I don't really know. I wasn't assessing this.

I was just going through it. I was just getting shit, like doing it, shit phase, where we go, what we do. There was no value. And remember, I kind of expected it with me. That arrogant, that young, I've been wanting to do this since I was 10. So this was what I expected of myself. And then also it wasn't really the stuff I wanted to do. I wanted to be a comic at, you know, Jim Kerry

and be doing things like, you know, farcical, faulty tower style sitcoms. And I was on panel show. It all kind of went a bit wrong somehow. And it's when you reflect and you realize, God, I didn't value any of that. And I didn't value, you know, like I walked out the second time I did live at the Apollo, the second one.

So I did three times, which is amazing. And the second time I did it, I bet, I tell you what, I bet I was told I was doing that. like, cool. And then I went up and I did it. And I didn't even stay and watch. I think I just, I literally did my second live of the Apollo. Had a fantastic time talking about Yeager bombs and being hung over and having, you know, when you have to go up, when you get a round double-decker bus and it's packed downstairs. And then you've got to make that call, shall I go upstairs? Or shall I stay down here? And then so you go, right, I'm good for God, I'll risk it. I'll see if there's a seat upstairs. And then you have to do that, walk up the stairs. And then you have to do that, walk up the stairs. and you turn round and it's packed and now you have to do the walk of shame down the stairs where everyone is waiting for you, you go, yeah, we knew. It's this London, everyone knew that was packed.

Nice right, dickhead. Yeah, exactly. So, but I finished that and I went home and I never thought about it again. There was no appreciation of these amazing things I was doing, whereas obviously with what happened with Strip me, everything after that, there's such an appreciation. I did Royal Albert Hall on Tuesday. Was it last Tuesday?

Or the Tuesday before. And it's such a, you just, I'm looking around, like, I can't believe I'm doing this. This is amazing. And you value everything. So that's been really good for me. Do you know what I understand? No, I understand. 100%.

Yeah. And I think I didn't add that in my 20s. There was no appreciation of fucking anything. And it's nice to be able to really value my life. I love my life. My life outside of comedy. Because when you're young, all it is is about comedy, comedy, comedy. And now I love my time off.

stage. I love my time in West London where I live and I have a day off and I fucking love it. And I never used to. He used to just be hung over and going, oh fuck, I've got a gig on shoes. Oh, fuck. You know? Are you glad you went through it? I, I, I, it's, you kind of want to, the Hollywood answer would be yes and you want to go, like, yeah, it made me a better person, but I think that it would have been nicer to have had an easier route. You can't be glad you went through that. It was, no. You know, Sean, I don't think it's possible to have the life that you had

without having some kind of crash. That's true. I don't think. Everyone thinks that says that to me. I don't think it was possible. Because that lack of presence with your life that you talk about in the 20s, it was always going to, because I speak from personal experience. Sure.

You're too arrogant. You're too arrogant. You start to think you're everything. Am I wrong? When were you feeling this? I was feeling it in different things that I was doing. Do you still have it? What, the arrogance?

Yeah. A little bit. But it's been tempered now. Do you have it? No, life beat the shit out of me. Life beat the living shit. There's a libertines line. I've got a quote.

It's beautiful. The libertines line. And I made it my Twitter bio. And I actually took it down because I thought, if I'm like, if I got an audition in America, which I sometimes get, they might see this. I think, what the fuck does that mean? And then they'll look back at the Strictly stuff. But Pete Dockley, Liberty's line, which is, a boy kicked out of the world,

the world kicked back a lot fucking harder now. That, for me, that was what I felt like when I was going through that Strictly stuff. I should get that as a tattoo. It's like I brought up, dad off his nut and drugs, went to school, didn't get a GCSE, but ended up playing the OTA arena. I felt like, you know, in a business that is full of middle class, Yeah. You know, middle,

everywhere, middle class people, private school people, people, a lot of people, their life is handed to them, but I've come in through this other route and then the world just went, bang! Yeah.

Fuck off! And I was like, oh, God. That heart. I know how you feel. Yeah, man. You know, when you asked me, I initially just gave you, my story was very,

sorry, God. No, no, it was much simpler. My parents, when I was born, My mom had been 18 for three days. My dad was 20. They were both students, really poor in Soviet Russia. Fast forward a few years. My dad becomes a mini oligarch.

Shit tons of money. Send me to private school in England. You know, son, don't worry. I was like, maybe I should get a job while I'm at school. Just didn't, you know. No, don't worry about it. Just get the grades. You go to university.

Get the grades. You're going to go to a big financial company, you know, company house, company car, company wife, company, like everything taken care of. And by the time I was 18, my dad had lost all his money for reasons we don't get. It's too long a story. Right. And I was sleeping in a park. Just loved getting back on the gear.

Sleeping in a park. Sleeping at a car. In a park. Around the corner of the venue where I did my first Edinburgh show. Around the corner, I was in university in Edinburgh. And I was sleeping in that park for three weeks, just trying to get my shit together. So that arrogance just gone in three weeks. all that, oh, I'm the top of the world, I'm special, I'm different, I'm this, I'm that.

No, no, no, you're right fucking here in the park. That's quite the fall. Yeah. And it happens quickly. So I know that feeling very well. That's very young as well. Very young. And I'm glad it happened that young.

Because all that would have happened to me is what happened to you. I would have just built my ego even more. I would have thought I would have got bigger and bigger in my own head and in the world. You know, because I was smart, I was talented. I would have made it through and I would have been bigger and bigger and bigger. But I'm glad of that. And I think there will come a time when you're glad of what you went through as well. Remember that I also, yeah, I see what you're saying.

Remember I also caused a lot of pain. You know, there were other people involved in my which, you know, you can't, you can't ever. I mean, I think everyone, as far as I can tell, everyone involved has gone on and is having a good time and doing well for themselves. But you split up, she split up with her husband, didn't she? Yes. They got divorced. And I think, I mean, I don't, you know, I try and stay away from anything that is attached to that whole time in my life.

But I think, you know, I think everyone's doing, everyone who's involved in that is doing well. And I wish them well. And I think that but it just makes it a bit difficult. So it makes it easier that you can look back and think, oh, I'm glad that happens. But you also have to always live with, you still caused quite a lot of, you know,

kind of, you cause a wreckage in your path. So can I be glad it happened to me? Maybe. Let's see where this ends up. But also, you know, with other people, look, you've got to take responsibility for your actions. Yeah. But they've got to take responsibility for their actions.

Well, I'm not getting involved I'm not saying that. That's going to be the title of the episode, Sean. She needs to take responsibility but it's true, man. No, no, no, no, no, no. We won't go there. This is not my fault.

No, no, but, but I, look, these things that happen in life, they're very important, man. They're very important. They're very important. And you will, the work you will do later in your life will be better for it.

Hmm. Well, yeah. It will be. It will be. And the kiss is a brilliant show. It's on YouTube. It's available for free people can go and watch it. Yes, stick on YouTube.

And are you touring as well? We're touring. I've got a podcast called What's Upset You Now. It's only 15 minutes long. You can hear that. And there's an extended episode on Patreon. But yeah, check out the, you know, if people are watching,

and, you know, they want to know more about what it was we're talking about, even though I think they've heard enough, there is a comedy version of it, Kiss, on YouTube. And also as well, I think it's important to say that. I remember the first time I saw you do comedy, and I was blown away. I thought you were just absolutely brilliant. And when I said the most naturally talented comedian on stage,

I meant it. Oh, thanks, man. When I've seen you live... Funny crying a minute. That's the purpose. That's what we like to end the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I always say that.

Everyone goes to me what Sean, I got the most naturally talented comedian I've ever seen. And I've seen you crocheted festivals, cat laughs, where you've been a few times where I was there. Your great live comic, and I really recommend people get a ticket and come and see you. Oh, thank you so much. It's been lovely to chat, and folks having me on. Before we let you go, though, we've got some questions from our local supporters, which we'll ask you after the interview.

But the last question we always ask is what's the one thing we're not talking about that we really should be? I think yes this is important is one thing I think that we need to clear up as and I don't know if it's a national problem or a global problem but the word next

when you say I'll meet you next Thursday some people think next Thursday is the Thursday coming and some people think next Thursday is the first the following week,

the next week, is that Thursday. And I think we need to get this cleared up because it's causing a lot of confusion and someone came to meet me recently. And they, that I thought that they meant the next,

I thought they meant the week after. Do you know what I'm saying? What do you think next is? I think when someone goes, If I'm meeting you, so I'm going to meet you, I'm going to meet you next Tuesday. Right. It depends on what day you're in. Yeah.

If we're, what? It depends what day we're in. Yeah. This is chaos. This is what I'm saying. This, we need to get this clear enough. Hold on. No, I don't think it's as complicated as you're making out to be.

It is as complicated. I've not, I didn't make, I was meant to be on talk sport to do a radio and I didn't make it. Because I had said next Thursday. And then they text me on the Thursday that week and they said, where are you? And I said, so I thought you meant next, I thought you meant the week after because I thought that most people think

the week after. So I changed what I thought it meant to to fit them. Because I actually think, even though despite I did that, I actually think next is just the next. It's the next. It's not, of course, imagine you were at a queue in a shop and you're at the front

of the queue and the guy behind the counter said, next, and the guy behind you walked round, you would think, what the What fuck are you doing? He said, next, I'm next. You're not next. So can we just get this soul, please? What do you think next? I've never seen them this angry, man. These are the real issues. These are the things that make getting through life tough. And this is what I'm trying to sort out. What is next? Well, that's what we're going to be talking about on the next episode. No, what do you think next is? It means next Thursday, it means not this Thursday, the one after.

Well, it's Thursday today, so that's confusing. Yeah. So, all right, next. Okay. So next Tuesday. I think it's a Tuesday afterwards. What you think that next Tuesday is, look at you, you've never... What do you think? We've had Jordan Peterson on the podcast. We've had Douglas Murray,

some of the greatest thinkers in the history of the modern world. Get Jordan Peterson to sort out when next is. Do you have contact with Jordan? I do. Can you find out what he thinks next Tuesday is? I'll do my best, and I'll let you know. Please.

We will. You don't seem to be taking it serious. When do you think next Tuesday is? Next Tuesday is the coming Tuesday now. Thank you, because it's the next Tuesday. But if... You think it's the Tuesday after you. But if this is a problem with the language.

But if today was Monday and you said next Tuesday, that would be the Monday after this coming Tuesday. Oh yeah, Tuesday can't be tomorrow. No. You can't say next Tuesday if it's tomorrow. It depends on the day you're in. Depends on the day you're in, just like I said. It does. Well, you know, but only if the day you're in is the...

You don't make it to talk radio. I'm really, really sorry. But it's not the fault of the world. It's yours. No, it's the fault of the language. We've got one word that is meaning different things. This has gone in a completely unexpected direction, Sean. It needed to be spoken about.

There we go. And we're doing it now. That's why we asked the big questions here. Guys, thank you so much for watching and listening. Make sure to follow Sean on all the socials and check out his special. It's called Kiss. We'll put a link to it in the description. We're going to ask a couple of your questions for Sean on our locals that only are supporters.

We'll see. In the meantime, thanks for watching. Where do I look? I don't know when to look when you're doing that. You're not going to be on camera here. We don't want to hear any more from you about next. I don't know when to look you're... Just look somewhere.

Bye. No, it's also available as a podcast. Fuck me. We've had Jordan Peterson on the show anyway. It was actually Will Smith, punching Chris Rockies. in the face. And there are people that are going, yeah, but would you let someone say that about your partner? You know, they wouldn't have to. I would have done it. I would have come in and

like, look, it's the old bald and chain. It was mad.