Trillbilly Worker's Party - Episode 142: Uniquely Qualified For These Times

Episode Date: April 16, 2020

This week we cover Bezos making billions off the pandemic, MAGA protests to re-open the economy, Pelosi's ice cream stash, and the Bernie/Obama endorsements of Biden. Patreon: www.patreon.com/trillbillyworkersparty

let me ask you this i've been thinking about something yes you what do you think is you know how the anabaptists have rumspringa uh-huh what's the equivalent thing for young evangelicals you know at that make or break moment when they can leave the faith or decide to like really get into it. It's easy, dog, when you're faced with popping your cherry, with losing your virginity. I was thinking there's something else. What is it?

What could it conceivably be? Are you familiar with it? That's the thing around which all Christian faith revolves. I don't want to hear it from anybody that, oh, I was a teenager. I believed in God. Life was precarious, et cetera, et cetera. I needed to believe that there was something out there in the universe. No. The only reason that anybody

would believe in God as a teenager is because they're scared of fucking yeah you're running from sexuality you're repressing I'm sorry I cut you off you ever heard of

a little outing called sea salt it sounds familiar You ever heard of a little outing called Sea Salt? It sounds familiar. Sea Salt was like one of those... It's like a vacation Bible school, but for like teens. And then you would go to South Carolina. VBS, baby. Vacation Bible school. I think it took place maybe around Myrtle Beach or something like that.

I'm not positive though but it was like the rite of passage for like young evangelicals and the thing was is you either came back so like ready to go like witness and win souls or you came back like fuck this shit extremely horny because you couldn't jerk off for a week no well all you all everybody talked to i think i'm back from fucking uh sea salt was how hot all the chicks were down there it's like man you would not believe you know like everybody thinks like their hometown has no good looking girls yeah you know what i mean like you just think that like you're from like the only ugly town in america then all girls everywhere else are so much hotter. Oh, yeah.

There was a town 20 minutes away from our town called Lovington. And Lovington was where all the hot chicks were at, man. Is that Brian Urlacher's hometown? That is Brian Urlacher's hometown. They had a cheese factory there. Amazing. I remember they took us to go watch that cheese get made. is hometown that is brian or like his hometown they had a cheese factory there amazing remember they took us to go watch that cheese get made did that i was loving 10 girls they just hit different they just hit different they were also like liberal i don't think so actually in and for

some reason i think in high school i had had this romanticized notion that they were enlightened. And all the girls in my high school were just conservative assholes. Yeah. I wasn't afraid of anything except for the big P and the V, though. Somehow the stakes were higher on that. Oh, yeah. I mean, I was getting head as a 16-year year old but like fucking like that was off the table out of the question well here's what we like to call that everything but everything but that's how you would describe it to your friends yeah

we've done everything but we've done everything, but. We've done everything, but. And this is how you come up with little crackpot theories about, man, I like getting head, but I like sex. Yeah. You know what I mean? That just because you're afraid of it, one. But two, you never had it to compare it to anything. You're just making an assumption.

Yeah. It is weird how your sexuality forms like that like i would i would like i would get on the three-way with all these girls talking shit to them having like early phone sex and stuff and i'd be terrified to do all the acts i was describing in real life but But in your little masturbatory circles, it was all, I mean, everything, every option was open to you, man, and no consequences. Oh, yeah.

Oh, absolutely. These are the conditions that made us, my friend. Yeah, this is what's made us uniquely qualified to rise up and lead in this moment. You know why? Because I'm versatile. I know how to get it in. I know how to abstain.

I don't think anybody understands going four or five months without masturbating as a Christian teen has prepared us for the quarantine. That's exactly right. To withstand the rigors of inactivity. The conditions and social forces that culminated at the end of the 20th century informed us, made us uniquely suitable to lead in these trying times. Yeah. Yeah. Because here's the reality here's the reality and i think we should all be reading marks i think we should all be doing this but i think also you'll never fully approximate this moment in america unless

you've had one of two experiences either you've been part of the weird american techno religion that you walk into a church and you see three atm machines before you see a cross or or or you're one of the peoples that have been terrorized by those people right right right everybody else is just kind ofating in here in the ether trying to figure it out Right, right, right I mean, where do we fall in that? I guess we are both That is, again, that's

We embody the dialectic That's why we are suited Uniquely suited to these times Yeah Well Um Well, so, okay suited to these times yeah well um well so okay so uh speaking of the uh insane psychos who came to economic prominence in the 80s 90s and 2000s and who now run the world and gave us donald trump we're recording this on a day of nationwide protests uh all over the nation of a certain

kind of a certain kind that are completely filled with these types of people. Well, I mean, they're filled with a lot of different types of people. But April 15th will go down as perhaps the dumbest day in the late Republic. Beware the Ides of April. That's what they'll say about this day. You're right. It is tax day. It's the Ides of April. It is tax day.

It's the Ides of April. And it's the dumbest day so far in the late republic's precipitous decline. Is it tax day? I forgot about that. Well, I guess we got to July now, though. We have to July now, but in another lifetime, in another timeline. I'd be starting doing my taxes here in about half an hour exactly um so so yeah so we've got so much to cover i don't even know where to start like um it's been a uniquely insane week, and it's only Wednesday.

Where I'm sitting in eastern Kentucky, half the county is out of power. In the middle of a pandemic. So that means people are stuck in their homes with no electricity or hot water or anything like that. Nothing but their Obama phones. All they have is their Obama phones. Tanya is one of them. Tanya does not have electricity.

That's why she's not joining us today. She is one of the 25,000 or I think it's more than that. I think it's like 40,000 people across eastern Kentucky without any electricity in the middle of a pandemic. These are not conditions one would call optimal. Not by any stretch of the imagination, no. And it's so weird that it's taken so long to get back online. I guess the pandemic presents challenges of its own for the crew people,

I guess the pandemic presents challenges of its own for the crew people, but it's like, I mean, everything's just magnified in Eastern Kentucky. Those storms were a week ago, you know what I mean? You were on Sunday, yeah. God, it feels like a week ago. Oh, I know, I know. So a lot of the eastern part of the state is out. Um, I think is, uh, Matt Jones pointed out on Twitter, there's been literally zero press coverage of it.

None. Um, there's nothing. I mean, you've got a, you've got a literal Mad Max scenario going on right here. Dude. Nothing. Nothing. I mean, the, we've, we've reached the point now. I mean, we've reached the point now. I mean, okay, I don't even know where to begin trying to articulate,

encapsulate for future generations the weird disorienting effect that is happening right now. I'm sitting in the middle of a region that is without electricity that has just been basically written off. No one even gives a shit. That created the concept of electricity, really. It's really a sick irony. A sick irony, right. Right. During a week in which during a week in which MAGA chuds protested state capitals all across the country for not being able to buy paint and lawn fertilizer and go get their hair did um during a week in which um bernie endorsed biden which i guess we saw coming but

it still didn't dull the blow of just how disorienting it was in all of this yeah during a week in which the trump administration is talking even more aggressively of reopening the economy. All of this is produced, I don't really have any other word for it or phrase for it other than just this very vague, dark feeling like we might be about to live through some really bad times. We've said that, obviously, everybody's been saying that for years.

Well, we just said that after watching Hypernormalization and all that stuff. But we didn't, like, really think it was going to happen. But it got me down. It happened. Like, man, I think about this every time we're like man this shit's so dark and like the thing that was happening in the news that day was something so mild by comparison to what's happening now right i just turned you and say man this shit is so fucking dark dog this shit is so dark dog dog man they're trying to fuck these teachers over in west virginia man shit is so fucking dark

all right they're trying to which is a bad thing don't get me wrong i'm just saying you know it's like they fought and they won but right it wasn't an extinction event right well so the first first off the coronavirus thing in and of itself is very disorienting for me because i've had this realization over the past few days but it really kind of hit me last night that like so let's say trump reopens the economy on may 1st and i mentioned this to you i think the other day on the phone. I may have even mentioned this on the podcast. I don't even know, because life and everything else is just blurred. Everything we've said on this podcast, let's just wipe it real quick,

and we'll start fresh right here. That's a new world. Yeah, this is year zero on the pod. Yeah. So, I mean, let's say that trump opens the economy in two weeks obviously like we're not going to um abide by it like well we're artisans we're podcasters so we don't have that's because we're bohemian light abouts exactly right but like how do you decide in, you know,

in the absence of any authoritative institutions and voices, how do you decide when such a quarantine would end? It's like I was saying to you earlier today, like, I don't trust anybody anymore. I don't trust any scientific voices or anything because it all feels like, you know, I was trying to explain this to Tolkien last night, but, like, when they decided to lock down the country.

Trying to mansplain it to your girlfriend, huh? I was trying to mansplain it. Imagine that. Okay, I wasn't explaining anything. I was trying to articulate a certain feeling i have and the feeling i have is people running the nation they made a strict calculus and they sat down they did a cost benefit analysis and said okay letting this thing just run rampant through the country will cause more economic damage than shutting as much shit as down as possible and so that's what they

went with well now we're in this situation where i feel like we are a month into quarantine right this started in early march right yeah i feel like this is the week and it might not it might just be because of the people protesting but i genuinely all my friends i've talked to whether they live in austin or new york have been able to detect something similar it feels like people are done with it oh Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen more people out than I have seen in a month. All my friends that I've talked to that live in Austin and other big cities say the exact same thing. People are getting antagonistic. I saw Gabriel Winant on Twitter said that someone rolled down their window and, like, did a fake sneeze at him because he was wearing a bandana in public

like you've got these people you've got you've got people like protesting at the capitol um you know tanya was testing texting us earlier about basheer's speech you could hear people in the background saying we want to work we want to work you know want to work. You know, that shit. Brace Lamb, the star of Showtime's Gigolos, posted some interesting videos today about it. Like what? Here, I'll just give you an example. I'll just give you the rundown real quick. Yeah. 2002, Nile virus is going to kill us all.

I think he meant West now virus. 2004, SARS virus is going to kill us all. Right. 2005, bird flu is going to kill us all. 2009, swine flu is going to kill us all. 2014,

Ebola virus is going to kill us all. 2016, Zika virus is going to kill us all. 2016, Zika virus is going to kill us all. 2020, coronavirus is going to kill us all. Wake up, people. They just want us living in fear. I'm not buying it. Please visit www.stoplookthink.com.

Oh, yes, I am. Stop Look Think. Where I have bylines at. And then he just captioned that with hashtag scamdemic. Scamdemic. I mean, it's created this disorienting effect where, like, I no longer know who to believe. to believe and i no longer trust that there's anybody out there who knows what they're talking about or who can even reassure us in these trying times that like it's okay to come out of your house i mean you saw this thing yesterday that's like who's gonna signal the end of this credible

yeah exactly who's gonna signal the end yeah and so it's like this disorienting effect where i don't fucking know like this is kind of what i meant earlier like so you know belief in scientific rationale or whatever is at the end of the day just like any other faith it's faith you it's it's honestly a lot like catholicism you need you need scientists sort of like priests to sort of intermediate or sort of mediate between you and the higher concept. And I've kind of like lost. I consider myself a scientist in some ways. You've lost faith in the community that birthed you?

Yes. um you've lost uh faith in the community that birthed you yes well it's funny because i remember i showed you a screenshot from this person i went to college with this insufferable person that was like it's like a fox news link to something to do with trump defunding the who yeah and what she captioned that with was i've not liked the way the WHO's acted this whole time. And I guarantee you, I guarantee you, she had no idea a month ago what the World Health Organization was. Yeah, I don't know. So, okay, have you read about this?

But your response was, wait a second, is the WHO one of those organizations we should keep an eye on? Yeah, I thought maybe... Like the International Monetary Fund, I think. Right, the IMF and the World Bank and the UN, do we need to now keep tabs on the WHO?

I don't know. I don't know! Who knows anymore? There's nothing, like, I don't know what to believe in anymore. I mean, it's sort of a cliche to say that our institutions have just been rotted out so, you know, tremendously bad. But, like, it's a cliche for a reason. Yeah, yeah. And you're feeling it pretty acutely. Like, again, I was trying to articulate this last night,

but, like, there is a very specific, like, macabre humor in the fact that we are supposed to rely on a government to keep us safe that has been specifically hollowed out to not keep us safe to not keep us safe yeah when you've got people like ben carson betsy devos and rick perry i know he's gone now and now and now and now vince mcmahon who else is leading in the reopening task force vince mcmahon robert craft uh i mean it's a it's a veritable who's who of billionaires that have either been implicated in sex crimes or are like glorified carnival barkers. I mean, like, and I think in that context. So on that side, like, okay, so yeah.

So you know you can't trust anything that comes out of those people's mouths. You know that, like, they are specifically set up to hurt us. Yeah. That was their, I mean, if you could just rewind the tape, like, back to 2017 when Trump was staffing all these agencies. He was staffing them with people who could intentionally dismantle them. Yeah, yeah. And so it's like, okay, well, the government is not only not helping us, the government literally exists to hurt us.

Yeah, I was like, what was Rick Perry was over like nukes or something? Energy, yeah. Energy, yeah, for a while. Well, and so the whole thing has just either been intentionally staffed to dismantle it or not staffed at all. And it's just falling apart at the seams. Yeah. And I saw this story of, you know, basically global leaders just really pissed off at Trump for talking about this hard, just being obsessed with this hard May 1st opening of the economy. But he's pushing for it, man. I saw a tweet or someone sent me a

tweet that was like, that said like people around Trump, I've gotten good word that people around Trump are convinced that he is dead set on reopening on may 1st so i don't know um so you've got that on that side and then on the other side you've got nancy pelosi showing off her ice cream collection they retreated and And Hillary Clinton saying... Dude, she's got fucking Jenny's ice cream by the pound, which is like $10 for a fucking pint. Right.

And she's got two huge freezers filled with it. Why did we ever get ourselves in a position where we not only gave these well we didn't really give them the reins i mean we're disadvantaged from the start but why do we make keep maintaining a posture that lets these people walk out of their houses feeling safe i don't dude i mean you yeah you've got so yeah you've got that person showing off her ice cream collection hillary clinton saying well i know what we need we just need to open the dang health care exchanges and in that context you know in in that context. I'm losing it, man. Dude, oh, oh. You want to go even further? Okay.

Jeff Bezos. What's Jeff done? God damn it. Let's go even further. Jeff Bezos, his fortune has grown by $24 billion amid the pandemic. So in the last month, essentially, this guy's made 24 billion more dollars dog you've got rich people escaping to jackson hole i'm going to say this and i'm not going to say that we that i'm not going to put parody on it i'm not going to say i'm joking i don't give a

fuck if the government shows up in my house i know know they won't. But we literally have to murder these people for the survival of the human species. Of our species. It's not even like a funny ha-ha joke. It's not even like, oh, let's guillotine them or they hurt us and all this. It's like, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.

We're going to have to get firearms like adults. Like adults. like no no no no we're gonna have to get firearms like adults and hop on the back of a of a for style points you get on a 74 panhead and get two sawed offs but anyway however you choose to do it we have to systematically murder all these people it's the only way forward yes and i'm not again i'm not saying this is like an edgelord thing i'm not i'm saying this strictly scientifically objectively human civilization is at the crisis point where we have to decide you don't need to read three volumes of capital by marx you should but you don't need to you don't need to. You don't need to read 200 years of theory and, you know,

all these post-structural... None of that. All you need to know is that human civilization is on a collision course with capitalism. And we cannot... And we have to present a challenge. Yes, we...

In the streets! in the streets. Like, human civilization will not survive this. I mean, you know, I guess you could be listening to this and saying, well, you know, you guys are talking about something different. Like, all these things are, you know, coronavirus is a disease diseases have existed before capital hey hey hey hey hey hey i'm not saying get within six feet of them i'm just saying fucking shoot them well we are now truly at the point where um i mean it's just fascinating to me that

the people who own F-350s and 80 different types of guns and are whining about not being able to get lawn fertilizer. That's what I was going to say when you brought that up dude. It's amazing to me all these people that have prepared for

the fucking Armageddon and prepared for this big fucking joust with the federal government are now proven to be the biggest bunch of fucking pussies that ever existed yeah well and now okay so now that bernie's off the stage i could just go ahead and tell you this. Those people are your fucking enemies. It's not just the millionaires and the billionaires. It's those fucking piece of shit, petty bourgeois, bourgeois small business owners who literally want you to die. They want you to fucking die. They literally want you to be cannon fodder to facilitate their upward mobility.

To facilitate their rise into that club with the fortune 500 boys that they will never get to yeah but i'm thoroughly convinced they will exactly you have your enemy now it's not abs it doesn't even have to be abstract millionaires and billionaires we will wet our palate off of these pieces of shit first you always need an appetizer never go into a delicious meal without an appetizer. We're going to fucking gorge ourselves on this appetizer. Yeah. Fuck these assholes.

Like, I cannot begin to articulate how much I hate them. Just fucking protesting outside of state capitals. Open up. Abortions are not essential. Open our businesses we want to work like bitch if you want to work you're the most fucking cucked piece of shit you know what we should do you know since they have these fantasies about like uh fucking planned parenthood or whoever the fuck ever having these baby parts

we need to like get those aborted fetuses and shower these motherfuckers with them like i've talked we gotta do some deviant shit you know what i mean to make a point you know how like vlad the impaler like impaled yeah yes i we need our we need our thing we need our thing like the the dead tom the dead baby shower so you know that's my calling card i i just put the the blood of aborted fetuses on my enemies the petty bouge republican small business or something or something it doesn't have to be that grotesque just something i don't know man i'm just so fucking like i'm just so not sure what to do anymore like um did you watch the obama endorsement of biden i got through about two minutes of it and

then i watched the the part where he talked about bernie sanders because somebody posted it but i didn't watch the whole 12 minute clip i couldn't i couldn't get there. Oh, dog. It made me very sick to my stomach. It was very fucking hard to watch. Yeah. What was your takeaway from it? Well, my takeaway is that... Before I talk about this, I just want to issue a preamble and say,

the Bernie thing, it's water under under the bridge no use crying over spilled milk but my man definitely gifted them on a silver platter um the end of well at least in this election cycle the end of a mass politics that was oriented around class because the way they cynically appropriated it in the way they you know the way that obama's talked about it and you know biden you see them saying not me us now and stuff yeah the way it's been cynically appropriated by them is just again that's why it made me feel sick to my stomach it's been cynically appropriated by them is just, again, that's why it made me feel sick to my stomach. It's just like, this is bleak, man. Like, you know, and I'm not disparaging Bernie.

I'm not one of these people that's like, you know, I'm not like a. A turncoat. Yeah, I'm not going to get on my high horse. I don't think Bernie's a traitor. I think he's a dumbass, but I don't think Bernie's a traitor i think he's a dumb ass but i don't think he's a traitor i'm not gonna get on my i don't think you you wipe the guys uh every good thing he's done by making a misstep here but it is a costly misstep yeah yeah it's pretty bad i mean if you want my candid thoughts on it um it's i think it's bad on a historical level because what it does is it signifies a closing off of political horizons in many ways. Yeah, you're right.

And what it says is that the way forward, we're in an acceleration moment, right? Like, we're talking about political expedience for the left. We don't really have the time to vote for Joe Biden, who still said today he supports the Hyde Amendment and all this kind of shit. Oh, my God. Yeah, I meant to talk to you about that. We don't have that kind of time. So right now, it's like if Obama's saying accelerate the endgame,

then you know what we need to be doing? Accelerating the endgame. Well, you know, I mean, especially in the context of like Hillary's remarks and Pelosi's remarks and like all this, like Bernie's, you know, endorsement essentially sends the signal to the working class that liberation can really only be achieved through working with the establishment.

It's a very dangerous signal to be sending at this time. Well, you just have no bargaining chip now. You know what I'm saying? Right. Maybe at a certain point that had, I mean, some credence to that idea, maybe in a more, a less dire circumstances. See, like, now what they're saying is the circumstances are so dire that we have to be incrementalists about it.

Right. But, see, I see the exact opposite. It's true. I say we can't afford to sort of like just, you know, sort of pussyfoot straight into the wood chipper. Well, the really unfortunate thing about electoral politics in this country, at least at the presidential level, but, I mean, it's true at all levels. You know, in fact, actually, now that I say this,

I'm remembering, like, AOC, who was the guy that she unseated? Was it Crowley? Crowley, yeah. Joe Crowley, was that him? Peter Crowley, Joe Crowley. Dick Nixon, who else? In a debate. Peter Northell, I don't know

in a debate against him he asked her like would you endorse me if I was to beat you in the primary and she said I'd have to go back to my constituents about that like I can't decide that i'd have to go back to my constituents about that like i

can't decide that i'd have to go back to my constituents and you know and like i've got a lot of problems with aoc but that's the exact right answer and the fact that there's no dialogue between us and bernie that the fact that there's just like none just zero here i mean it says a lot of things yeah you're yeah you're exactly right it's like um yeah it says it's it's like no just do what i say and this is like what's like this is your direct these are your marching orders now right you know what i mean in a sense and you know he's got the platform whatever but it's like you know it's it's not it's not good well i mean the fact that like um there is this disconnect i guess between us and him it kind of just shows you that we read a lot of things into him that weren't there granted you know i was

never under the illusion that well i guess maybe i was i was kind of under the illusion that maybe he would understand the historical conditions the historical unprecedentedness i guess of our situation all the things that have changed between 2016 and now and say well fuck it i'm you know i may have said i'm gonna endorse the nominee but fuck it like it's too fucking – it's too dire now. The stakes are too high. And maybe – because he's got agency here. It was a conscious choice he made. Again, I'm not like – it's stupid to get hung up on it because it's spilled milk. But honestly, though, if he was the historical figure that I guess we're being told he is,

then he would have been able to see that like desperate times call for desperate measures. And endorsing Biden was like a world historical error. He was bad. It wasn't, it wasn't good. Yeah. Not good folks.

Yeah. Yeah. This is like, yeah, these are, well, what, yeah, these are. Well, what it does, okay, if you really want me to get cynical, do you really want me to get cynical? Go for it, man.

What it does is it really just shows you that there's no left. There's no left. It's like if there was a left, he would be answerable to it. But there's not not so he's not like what we mean by left is like what we were talking about the other day there is a pre-tailored subculture of consumers who buy leftist products like podcasts and books like there's no fucking left movement yeah well i mean that's too it's like i mean granted you know we we traffic in that world too so we're hypocritical when we said that but the thing we recognize too and what and kind of

what we were joking about with our dumb ass episode we did last sunday was this idea that like we've seen this before you know what i mean but let me tell you the difference the christian right that I was a part of as a young person is infinitely better at politics than we are. Let me tell you, dude, I can remember, and I didn't even think of it in these terms then because my family had been social democrats and we just didn't really move off that. But I can remember so many people. I can remember a friend of mine, Sam, in high school, went to this place called The Ramp, I think it was called. Did you ever hear about this, The Ramp?

I don't think so, no. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I think it's kind of one of those things like Seesaw, like I was joking about when we opened up, kind of one of those Christian summer campy things. And they went and they came back and you know they had that sort of you know uh sort of like conversion experience where you know the church turns the ac real high and you get a chill and you think that's the holy ghost you go up there and you recommit and you leave on fire for God and ready to go proselytize and all that kind of stuff.

But he came back. We were lifeguards at the swimming pool that summer we worked at back home. And he came back, and I remember having conversations with him, and I remember him saying to me, Well, let me tell you one thing I learned when I was there at the ramp or whatever. learned when i was there at the ramp or whatever he said did you know that when justice samuel alito was named to the united states supreme court that there was there was like all these people from the ramp that were out protesting abortion because like they were all out doing like the like the dead out you know like we

would do for like police shootings or something but they were doing it for like the babies the abortions or whatever right and he said we were all out there man protesting in dc and we all had the red tape over our mouths and we were acting dead and like the police were coming saying stuff to us and all this and he said while we were out there man you'll never believe what happened he said did you know that the the supreme court chambers the building i don't know where does the supreme court meet i guess they call that the supreme court yeah i guess whatever the whatever the physical building is called he said right across whatever the i don't know if it's the river or the road or whatever he said right across from there though they were building the u.s bank building at the same time and you know what it

you know what it looks like he said it was built in the shape of an arrow. They were saying that Sam Alito's appointment to the Supreme Court coincided with this building that was shaped like an arrow pointed at the Supreme Court, and they took that as a divine sign that Sam Alito's appointment was going to end abortion. Now, of course, any rational adult here understands that if Bush, too, wanted to end abortion, he had a mandate. He had the Supreme Court. He had Congress. He had the executive seat. They could have ended abortion if they wanted to, but they didn't want to do that.

They have to keep that football, right? Right. Right. And, but like, like we have like, I think we've dismissed sort of the culture war stuff as like passe or something for a different time and sort of gotten ahead of ourselves. But man, there's so much like damage to undo from that shit. Yeah. And me and you are only a handful of the people I know that ever got out of that shit, man. Even if like you're not diehard into it, your politics still lay there. I don't know, man.

I didn't say all that to say we should start indoctrinating our kids in the same ways, but we should start indoctrinating our kids in the same ways. we should start indoctrinating our kids in the same ways. We should teach them that we should burn down U.S. bank buildings once they come up. That we should murder people like Sam Alito once they start rising

to power. We have to constantly be fighting warfare with these people. I know what you say to this. Tom, that's edgelord bullshit and you're not going to do anything blah blah blah blah blah blah and it's like look nobody thinks that stuff is

preferable okay like I want to sit on my fucking fat ass and eat mango sorbet all day and drink my diet sun kissed and watch fucking TV shows but we might not have a choice here soon. You know what I'm saying?

I don't think we're going to have a choice here soon. I think that if you look back at the history of global capitalism, what you generally find is that any time a global hegemon is declining, a large-scale global interstate conflict generally breaks out. Yeah. And so we may not have a choice. I know. I mean, granted, you could be listening to this and being like,

these guys have completely lost it. They've been stuck inside and have just been reading books and reading news and are completely detached from reality and they don't you know they're just paranoid let me tell me tell you my friend let me tell you my friend i'm like fucking uh what's his name from network howard bill howard bill the prophet at the end of the century. That's how I feel. I mean, yeah, because... You know, I'm not saying that any of these things will happen. You know, the thing about history is that none of it is inevitable.

But that's kind of what i mean when i point out this thing about bernie it's not inevitable that he endorsed biden everybody says oh well you're a dumbass if you thought that he was going to do anything different well no i don't think so i don't think it's inevitable he has agency would i have taken that deal i may have i don't know yeah i'd make that deal but i mean you know i mean i've been chewed out but i mean because you know but in in bernie's mind just to return back to this for a second i don't want to spend much more time on it but in bernie's mind that's probably his the the way that he sees it, it's probably the

best way to preserve what momentum he had built. It's an incredibly short-sighted and Pollyannish view of American politics, but he's not a very cynical guy. And like I've said before, he's an honest broker of our aspirations and needs and everything else. But if we're talking about how history is made, it really does come down to decisions like that. You really have to be bold and sort of understand what's at stake, understand what is and what isn't possible. I don't know what the alternative would have been, though.

I don't know what the alternative would have been, though. I don't know how he would have been able to say, no, I'm not endorsing Biden. Because, you know, that's the thing about this Bernie or bust stuff. That is all going to go away in a week or two. Like, there is no Bernie or bust anymore. Like, you know, there's nothing to put that energy into. It was fun for us all to say on Twitter for a few weeks. Well, and the thing is, if bernie would have handled that differently if he would have refused to endorse biden which i think would have been

like the bare minimum acceptable choice in this you know what i'm saying like not even not acceptable i mean like i understand from bernie's worldview and he's not giving us anything that wasn't in the brochure by endorsing biden but like in my mind something to galvanize this movement towards some sort of collective action i think like like what he should have done was just realize these people hate hate him hate even his modest proposal for reform and should have just said all right well figure it out you know and not endorsed him then bernie or buzz or Buzz could have had a chance to thrive. Or at least have been some sort of meaningful intervention.

Been something, yeah. It wouldn't have been an insignificant thing. It would have left him on skates. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But now, don't you feel, there's weird things that happen, man. There's weird things that happen psychically in this country. It's one thing, and granted, I'll concede up front I could be losing my goddamn mind. But there are just winds of change that shift,

and I can just see this great falling away to voting for Biden. I can see this great falling away to telling, like, women, nobody really gives a fuck about your safety. You know, tacitly, anyway. You know what I mean? They'll pay lip service to it all day long, but tacitly what they're saying is that. Well, that's what I don't understand about all this. It's like, on one hand, I totally understand why Bernie did that. But on the other hand, it's like, do you really,

are you really so naive to think that a guy who supports the Hyde Amendment is going to embrace any of your policies? Like, I mean, again, I'm not a, I admit that I am a loser 32-year-old who lives in a cabin in the woods. Listen, there's nothing you can say about us that we don't say about ourselves and can say. Yes, I know, we're bloviating assholes

and we're second rate intellects and etc etc. We know this. We know this. It's like, they're like Eminem and 8 Mile in that last battle. You know what I mean? Exactly. Tell us something we don't know about ourselves. Right.

But having said that, I kind of feel like just common sense would tell you, like, if the guy who believes everything that you don't believe is telling you, oh, sure, buddy. Yeah, we'll do those things. Yeah.

What kind of Rube would believe that? And I know, again, this is an incredibly reactionary country, a very right-wing country. I'll say this. I don't think it's, like, Rubish of Bernie. What I think Bernie thinks he's doing is bringing our ideas into the mainstream. Yes, that's a good point. By, like, not doing what we're doing like you know showing our ass

and saying we're going to like murder sam alito and nancy pelosi and whoever else and you know i think part of his being an honest broker is is is that like that's what i think is he's hoping to achieve by this and the thing is on a long timeline, there might be a little bit of credence to that, but we don't have a long enough timeline. Well, that's the thing. I don't even know if on a long enough timeline, it will bear fruits. I'm kind of of the opinion that he kind of took those policies

and plans to the graveyard by taking them to show up oh yeah yeah yeah this is this is a man that didn't know his sister from his wife a month ago you think he's going to like parse out the finer points of like fucking free college brawl and all that shit no yeah not exactly like it's very cynically motivated. It's very obviously cynical. You can even see it in the way that they used Obama to broker it and to say that if I was running again, I wouldn't run the same campaign I ran in 2008. These are different times, and they require progressive ideas. Well, I would say to that, I would say, you mean 2012? Like 2008 Obama was a total like, I mean like, I don't know. You'd have to go back and look at it now. I mean, I probably wasn't as astute. Well, still not astute.

You know what I mean? Like I think like 2008, you know, he ran on closing Guantanamo and all this stuff. He was saying the right things then. Yeah. For that time. What he's saying, and this is what is really cynical about it, what he's saying is he acknowledges that the times are incredibly dire and that everybody is a little scared and not sure what to do.

The economy is crashing. You would think that you would need some sort of revival of FDR programs or whatever. What he's saying is he acknowledges all that. But it's ultimately the Warren thing. When you think about it, it is ultimately the Warren thing recreated. It's just like, oh, we acknowledge that deep changes need to be made. But we're not going to do them. You're crazy. deep changes need to be made but we're not gonna do them you're crazy you're out of your mind we're not actually gonna do them but we do need your

vote so we're not going to commit ourselves too thoroughly to this yeah yeah yeah i don't know man i don't know i just don't i think it's bad i think it's a bad move for Bernie again I don't it's kind of pointless to try to dissect it and say shoulda coulda woulda but it's it's honestly a really bad move because once you put your ball in their court like there's no fucking way it's just gonna fucking flatten it with a knife yeah man I did that well it's well it's greater for well here's the other thing too it's just it's greater forces than just even Joe Biden and Barack Obama. You know what I'm saying? Like who?

Well, I mean, the buck doesn't stop with those guys. This whole thing is not their project. You know what I mean? They're just the mouthpieces and foot soldiers of this project. You know what I mean? Like just the craven, charismatic jackals that don't care to carry water this project you know what i mean like just the craven like charismatic jackals that don't care to carry water for you know again a boilerplate point but like the people that really control this country right right around the world by extension but doesn't it

kind of give you i mean again i think all of this has been swirling around in my mind like the uncertainty of the coronavirus thing the lack of any authoritative science scientific figures you know the mega people protesting this dropped like a bomb right in the middle of all that

and basically just said to me that like for the foreseeable future we are... Whether anybody wants to acknowledge it or not, this is what happened. Any build-up hope that we had that was just going to be deferred for a few years until Bernie can get an office or whatever, all that was stripped from us,

and it's unclear if we'll ever have that again. Right. In ways that we can comprehend and understand. You know what I'm saying? It's like we were talking about with electoral politics or whatever. It's like this is the way most people relate to politics, and that's why I think it was so palpable to us for when like you know bernie came out of the gates and he was polling at two percent then he built this movement and he was like there right up until the end both times you know and i felt like we just thought like if we just keep pushing

a little bit if we do this if we can out organize them if we can do this and that and the third but what we realized is like toward those ends that stuff doesn't avail much because they that like they didn't out organize us you know what i mean and i mean for all the like oh well we didn't appeal to this voters this voting group we didn't get the votes we i agree with you i'm with you on that but they didn't get them either you know you know what i mean they didn't even open a goddamn field office in a lot of these states you know right right right no in a different time this is honestly the most bizarre thing about that obama endorsement is that that video was almost it was basically obama confessing that if america were different in a different time they would elect a guy like bernie

but america's too far gone now so we gotta go with joe yeah yeah yeah it was like it was it was a sneak diss. Oh, we're so fucked. There was a time when Bernie Sanders, there was a time when Bernie Sanders, he could have engendered some hope. That time was 1938. Hell, even 2008. That time was fast. It was 1938. Hell, even 2008.

That time was 12 years ago. And I squandered it. Because I'm a huge fucking dumbass too. I could have done it. I could have. I had a mandate. Instead, I thought it more important to do cash for clunkers. I had to ban clove cigarettes.

Get what I wanted. And that's just how you do politics folks so now what we're left with is uh you have to commit to peonage to get an education well the the craziest thing i cannot stop coming back to the quote you don't have to do this joe you don't have to do this i can't keep coming i can't stop coming back to the quote, you don't have to do this, Joe. You don't have to do this. I can't stop coming back to that. And the reason why is because it tacitly acknowledges that they're not confident that Biden can win. Oh, they're shooting from the hip, my man. They're shooting from the hip. You may take as the other thing, too, is they know they're in the death throes. This is a desperation heave.

thing too is they they know they're in the death throes this is this is a desperation heave this is when you bring fucking doug flutie off the bench or something just to slink like the grizzled vet that you know that you know it's well past their prime but can still get 15 on any given night maybe lift you but man goddamn those knees look super fucking creaky. That's just bone on bone. There's no cartilage there. Well, it hints at some sort of underlying dynamic. And again, this is why I think that Bernie's endorsing Biden was a huge error, because this is who the Democratic establishment is going for, and they're not even confident that they can do it.

And so the fact that Bernie sided with him in this, because, you know, make no mistake, that's what he was doing. Again, I don't think that makes him a traitor. I just think that he was trying to advance. said about jesse jackson because really the fascinating thing about all this is it really mirrors in many ways what happened with the rainbow coalition and jesse jackson and you know and he always said like i don't think jesse jackson betrayed us i just think that he made a choice he saw by folding back into the democratic party an opportunity to further his own agenda well we've had two examples in the last 35 years 40 years of that not of that not working actually four because jesse jackson ran twice and bernie ran twice yeah yeah so i think we could confidently say we should not be doing that

anymore we did learn a lot about the contradictions of american society and um more specifically where it's heading right now but um but when you really watch the way these people like try to rationalize this especially that biden that obama video it's dark man and um and they all seem to realize it too again it they it seems to occur to obama and probably tom perez and all the rest of them that this is politics now this is what the political economy looks like of a system in free fall and they just can't keep up and it's scary that we came so close it's not the thing about bern it's scary that we came so close. It's not the thing about Bernie isn't that we came so close to winning.

It's scary that we came so close to making him realize what was at stake and that he could exploit this opportunity to carve out maybe some sort of new political vision. And maybe we didn't make the strong enough case or what? Well, I think it's not, I don't even think it's that. I just think it's the structural features of electoral politics. I think that they, and especially within the Democratic Party, I think it necessitates this disconnect between leaders and rank and file.

And so, yeah, I mean, I i don't know i'm sure the people around him made the case i don't know though i have no idea um maybe they maybe they didn't understand the stakes either maybe they didn't understand what was happening either but but now we're all gonna suffer for it and we're probably all gonna die it's not good man this is gonna sound extremely dark and i don't say this to bring anybody down at all and it just could be the circumstances in my life or anything this is the first time i've ever been alive where i have like a diminished fear of death and this is I'm talking about this is a brain that I have inside my skull that has

been wrecked with anxiety and fears about exactly that thing since as long as I can remember from being afraid that like somebody was gonna like kidnap me and throw me in the back of their trunk during the stranger danger era of the early 90s all the way up to you know the panic attacks of your 20s and whatever and now it's like now it's like i don't like that though like i need something to tie my hope to and i don't know i i welcome that if anybody knows what what that could possibly be well it's interesting because i almost had an opposite it's so fascinating to go back and read your journals if you if you are a journaling person i encourage you to go back and read your journal entries from the last two months i think that i think the the correct thing is person of journals. Person of letters?

Person of journals? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Because you will notice an incredible... It's like the stock market. The swings are insane. Because when this Bernie stuff really started popping off, like when we thought we had a chance back in February... Had a chance as ass.

We said we're going to win 47 out of 50 50 primaries thought we had it in the bag when you go back and read that like i was like as as a person who trigger warning suicidally ideates probably about a million times a day i was feeling positively great i was like life has purpose now life has meaning like you know you like i i mean i felt like um that adam curtis russell brand uh you know podcast about like you know if you put your if you put yourself into something bigger than yourself if you allow yourself to dissolve into something bigger if you give up a part of yourself yeah um then you can overcome a lot of your uh you know depression and addiction and all of this and that's what i was

feeling back in february it's like i've done it. I've finally done it. And then Birdie just fucking endorsed him. And I'm like, God fucking damn it. That's the thing, too. That's the thing I did, too, dude, is I hitched my hope wagon to that. And even if he wasn't going to win, and even if he wasn't going to win,

I attached my hope wagon to the idea that he was going to make some grand gesture that was going to energize us. You know what I mean? Yeah, that was more realistically idea that he was going to make some grand gesture that was going to energize us. You know what I mean? Yeah, that was more realistically what I thought was going to happen. I'm going to be honest with you. I was not prepared for this to go right back to the cynical, fucked up, no alternatives world we lived in. In the interregnum between like 2016, before 2016 and after 2016.

You know what I mean? Where like, oh shit like you know i really thought like oh he'll understand now that so much has changed that the contradictions can't be resolved anymore and that he will carve out maybe something unique and etc we could all plug into it but but no nah it's just full speed into the sun now fuck it well what can we do though what can we do to i almost had a word slip said hasten that how can we die fast i mean what could i didn't mean that so what can we do to curb that i think it's an open question that we need to meditate on.

And granted, when we're here saying all this stuff, we're mostly saying it for your amusement. But, you know, there's also some real shit to it. I mean, it's just so disappointing and so... It just takes the wind out of yourselves, man.

I don't know what else to say about it, but this is... I'm scared because I've never felt more hopeless but more at peace with hopelessness, if that makes sense. Do you know what I'm saying? Well, what it is is it's a realization that perhaps... I think this is why i have been so into that

erigy book the long 20th century i think it's why i've been so into it because in many ways like marx itself like the bible like um mu uh muhammadar gaddafi's green book um like don blankenship's uh prison manifesto exactly all the great texts of our you know that we've produced over centuries exactly like those texts it kind of hints at there is a large there are larger forces at work that you're just kind of blown around by. You know what I mean? Is this Ned Beatty speech network? To what?

Is this Ned Beatty speech network? Yeah, the Ned Beatty speech network. Like, you will atone. Yeah, like that you're nothing, essentially. And that there are larger forces that at the end of the day, there's really nothing you can do about them. And I know that's not what Marx is actually saying. That's actually the opposite of what Marx is saying.

But it is kind of comforting, going back to what you were saying, that it's, yeah, comforting. It's kind of comforting to realize that like all the organizing and work that we've done in the last oh i don't know four to six to ten years um it's not that it was for not it might just be that there are larger forces at work that we just can't compete with. You should cut that. I'm not going to.

I probably should not be taking people down that road because. No, we don't want to inspire apathy or inaction. But what we have to do is we have to figure out what it is within our. You know, it's like anything you ever try to do in life, there's a way you have to go about doing it. It's like... You know what I'm saying? There's a hacky way to do something,

and then there's the way that's like, you know, the professional way, for lack of a better term, to do something. You know what I'm saying? I know what you're saying, yeah. Like, there's hurdles you have to jump that, like, people that never make it don't know how to jump those hurdles or whatever. You know what I'm saying?

I mean, this is, like, really kind of snowballing in with, like, some rise or grind theory I had in 2009 but follow me but there's like there's always the secret sauce of how something gets done and that's like the hallmark of like you know getting it done versus not getting it done well you it's almost like you realize the to me, the most fascinating takeaway from the Bernie campaign was that we got to see in real time. We got to witness one of those world historical moments. It was squandered. Make no mistake.

It should be written down in the history books that Bernie squandered it. But we, you know. Hang that around no bastard's neck. But we did but you know, hang that around no bastard's neck. But we did get to see, yes, it allowed us to see something that you very rarely get to see, that all the social forces and contingencies and et cetera come together to present you with a moment. That moment was the second, first or second week of March when everything had been upended. Sports had just been canceled.

Work and everything else had just been canceled. They had held a primary in the middle of a pandemic. The veil fell off of three or four hundred years of all of Western civilization's philosophical underpinnings fell away within a matter of days. There is no democracy. There's no scientific rationality to anything. It was all dissolved right in front of our eyes. And Bernie had the chance.

This is putting a lot on one guy. This is putting a lot on one guy. And this is why he ultimately squandered it. Because no one in their right minds would be able to really realize this moment when it came. Except me, of course, but that's because I am being... I have a level of analysis to take note of. Because I'm a solipsist, I'm a narcissist, and I believe that I'm the only person that exists in the universe. person that exists in the universe um but yeah no like we had that moment where all the sort of like so forces and contingencies presented us with a moment that said well you can take history by

the hand you can actually seize history and again it was squandered and uh and now we're going to live with the consequences um and again it's really absurd to put it all on that guy because ultimately what I'm saying is that the sort of structural features of the system and the social forces and et cetera created a situation where it would have been impossible for him to realize that, you know? Like, he's been in fucking Congress for 30 fucking years.

There's zero connection between him and... Hey, and he's never had a real job. Right. I mean, it's really kind of farcical in hindsight, like, the whole not-me-us thing, when, like, there's zero connection between the whole us part and him. Yeah, because ultimately the whole us part and him.

Yeah, because ultimately the in-prescription lies with him. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's exactly right. And that's what electoral politics is. And again, I mean, we should have known that going in. I'm sure we probably mentioned it on episode 78 or some bullshit when we were fucking going in on ultra-leftist politics or whatever. I'm sure that was probably something that occurred to us a long-ass time ago, but we have the memories of Goldfish, and we also...

We also hedge our bets. Exactly. It's like we're the guys that we shoot a hole in the side of the bar and then go paint the bullseye over where we shot the hole in at. Exactly, because we're hacks. Exactly. So, I mean, I don't know. But, you know, I mean, this is a lot of doomerism, but it's really not.

It's just saying that, like, history's fucking nuts, man. It's fucking insane. It escalated quickly. It got away from us, as you say. It kind of got away from us a little bit. A lot of it. There's nothing you can do, really. I don't know.

I mean, I don't trust anybody whose analysis has not changed one iota from a year ago to now. And you shouldn't either. Take that what you will. I mean, I'm not going to tell you which organization to join and which organization not to join because I'm not involved with that kind of...

My politics, like at the activist level, is only at a strictly very local level. You know? Yeah. I'm not getting involved with any national organization anytime soon. It's just because we just can't, you know, Yeah. Not getting involved with any national organization anytime soon. That's just because we just can't, you know,

in places like where we live. Yeah, exactly. I mean, you know, maybe we can in a few months, but right now it's like I've got to make sense of the situation first. Got a lot of leg work today. Yeah. I mean, if you really want concrete actions right now i don't know read marks i don't you know what i mean it's it's funny he's a funny guy

a little long-winded at points but yeah a little long-winded at points i don't know that's not concrete enough either i mean whatever everybody's doing great everybody you're doing great just keep on doing what you're doing actually don't keep plugging baby just keep plugging along i do have to say it's very it's very annoying when i people when i see people say like well what we have to do obviously is? It's like such a vague verb. Yeah. I don't know what the fuck it means. Yeah.

And also, I mean, look. I've done a fair bit of organizing. The way things are laying, man, I couldn't organize a goddamn trip to fucking Taco Bell right now. That's just a sad reality. We'll keep that in mind next time we are stoned and need a ride. Nah, I mean, the best you can do right now

in the short term, I'm not saying that this is political action or that you should invest years into this. Um, but in the short term, it's like I made masks yesterday or the past two days I've been making masks with my girlfriend and, uh,

for the local hospitals around here. And it's felt pretty good. You know, I mean, there's no, like, political demands or anything attached to it. It's, you know, it's kind of like food, not bombs or whatever. But it'll at least help you take your mind off of things for at least a minute and, you know. But at the same time, I guess you shouldn't lose sight

of the fact that Jeff Bezos has gained $24 billion. In days. In days. I mean, you remember when we were all ready to harangue that guy that went all over the place and was hoarding shit and selling it for triple the price on Amazon or whatever? Yeah. Well, that guy deserves to die, too. But actually, let me stop short of that.

Let's kill that guy first we'll do later well it's crazy that we've now reached a level of capitalism where there is not a execution or torture method that would be adequate to what that motherfucker deserves you know what i'm saying no no if you plucked every toenail off of him if you you know fucking cut his eyelids off and kept taking his picture if you basically used every every torture method is laid out by the wu-tang clan it still wouldn't be even pale in comparison to what he deserves. Exactly. And so I think that in the coming years,

Amazon is now, if you need concrete actions, okay, maybe this is the thing that draws it back together. If you need concrete actions and you need a concrete enemy, a resolute enemy, it is Jeff Bezos. And not just for abstract reasons,

because Amazon is going to emerge from this crisis even more powerful than they already are. They are like a business organization that I've never seen before. I think that in many ways they feel unprecedented because I don't even know really what the fuck they do they just move shit around they're honestly like the fucking dutch in like the 1600s or something they just move shit from one place to the other and look what happened to the fucking dutch am i right the little boy in the with his finger in the dike didn't couldn't stop them from couldn't stop them from falling apart. Couldn't stop them from falling apart, no.

But seriously, that is going to be our number one enemy in the coming years. I mean, they control everything. He's making robot dogs, everybody. Yeah, smash those fucking drones and robots. Fuck those goddamn things. But seriously uh they've become so powerful and all-encompassing that um we have to take them down we sit we have no other choice but to take them down yeah i mean it's it's as simple as it gets it's as simple as it gets. It's as simple as it gets. It's as clear-cut as it gets.

And Bernie being out does not, you know... We might have got a little too doomer there for a little bit. I don't know. But we were on a yarn. We were really pursuing an idea. When you get on a yarn, you just... Yeah, I think I advocated for about Four or five extra judicial killings There All parody now that we're

At the end of this It's a parody account But Bernie being out Should not take your eyes off the ball That we have one task And that's to end capitalism Before it ends us Like That's all there is to it yeah that

capitalism is incompatible with the continued existence of human life on this planet and um if you think otherwise you're scab that's right and so yeah people say like we've grown past the need for birding etc i thought we i think we missed a big opportunity there i don't know when the next one is going to come around but um but more and more people are saying it folks capitalism's bad and um and all you really need to do is get a group of a few hundred thousand people to believe that very core idea, that very basic idea, and who the fuck knows what we can do with it.

I hope that people don't say run AOC or another Justice Democrat in 2024, because if that's the case, I'm going to try to drown myself in my shallow pond. Let's try to, you know, the thing about electoral strategies, okay, I think that's a whole other yarn for a whole different day, but it's like I think we have to assume some modicum of real power before we go back to that. You know what I'm saying? Well, I think that it's like we said on the last episode,

and I still stand by this, I think that the House of Representatives is a realistic goal. I don't think we're, of course we're not going to take it. There's no fucking way we can do that. How many representatives? 436? 300, 340? Yeah, something like that.

I think it's 435 or 36. Whatever it is. I always know this because eastern Kentucky is the fucking poorest. Dead last in every single. We're dead last. It's easy to find us. You just go straight to the bottom. And if we're not dead last, we're the one before it. Right.

But I think that we can make pretty good headway there and maybe in state legislatures But whatever we do it doesn't ultimately Matter for the purposes of this specific podcast episode and this specific historical moment Because all we really need to do in this moment is to return to the advice Of our brother Assad Hader and just, you've got to keep the faith that a better world is possible. That a better world, that this

world does not have to exist. That markets and capitalism are not necessary for human life. And that we can build something better. And that's all that's sufficient right now. Take with that whatever you will.

Go make masks. Go, you know, do what Tom's doing. And I'm not entirely sure what you're doing, Tom. You and me both. But I do miss you, buddy. I haven't seen you physically in over a month. It's been rough. Every time you do see me, buddy. I haven't seen you physically in over a month. It's been rough.

Every time you do see me, the camera's off. You have no idea what I look like on the other side of this. And frankly, you don't want to know. Sunkissed Danes. God damn. I've lived off goddamn canned foods and fucking TV dinners. I bet my blood pressure's through the fucking roof roof i have lost a lot of weight though so i guess that's oh that's good that's strikes and gutters i suppose yeah well um i hope if you're out there you're doing

whatever you can to keep your mind during all this because that's really the most important thing don't go paranoid and say like me and Tom. Yeah, don't. A couple things to avoid. Any website called JesusIsSavior.org Any website called StopLookThink.com

Scandemic.com Scandemic.com Scandemic.com and lest you've never been a 12 year old boy whitehouse.com I think I was what was the first one?

Eat, pray, love or something.com What was it? Stoplookfink.com and then JesusIsSavior.org. JesusIsSavior.org. They had to go with the.org on that one, huh? Yeah. I don't know how they got that. I don't know how an organization said the new international version of the Bible was written in hell.

Got it qualified for a.org. What branch of Christianity is that that thinks the NIV was transcribed in hell? Whatever John Hagee's a part of. I mean, look, there's worse jobs to have than transcribing the Bible in hell. Imagine if that was your job, and you have to transcribe it on the back of some sinner.

I mean, you're a sinner, so someone's probably transcribing it on your back, too. In like a lava pen. That's what they have in hell. They have lava pens. If you take that job, you better lobby the union for PPE, buddy. That's all I have in hell. They have lava pens. If you take that job, you better lobby the union for PPE, buddy. That's all I got to say about it. Damn, so true.

I agree. I agree with that. All right, let's sign off. I got to smoke this joint before I lose my mind. All right, well, let's see see a couple things to plug um first thing sunday service hopefully you like the sunday service i i noticed that it doesn't have as quite as many listens as our regular episode so that means you don't like the bonus content guess what buddy you you you reject the word reject the word of truth at your own peril, folks.

That's all I got to say. Exactly. Check out Sunday service. We should have another good one for you this Sunday. Give you a little teaser. The message is going to be called Gays, Lesbians, and Non-Binaries of the Bible. Gays and Lesbians for the minbinaries of the Bible. Gays and lesbians for the minors.

For the Bible. And then on another episode on Sunday, we've got the content for you. It probably doesn't matter because they're probably going to cut this fucking quarantine off in a goddamn week so it doesn't matter anymore, but regardless, we've still got the quarantine content

for you. We've got Sunday service and we've got patreon um hopefully we can get tanya some energy some energy burn a few coal rocks for her so she can get back on this is the weird thing about podcasting i guess i hadn't really uh forecasted a scenario like this where we're completely out of power and Tanya can't. Well, I have power, but that's because I live in town and Tanya lives up on the mountain. Well, nobody else saw Major League Baseball ending either, but here we are.

So, folks, we'll do the best we can with what we got. Yeah, so go check the Patreon out and support us If you want to send Tanya Some love I guess she can't really read it because she doesn't have internet access But maybe when she

Gets back on to the internet She can have some DMs I would send out her Venmo But you know what I'm Tanya's friend but I'm not that good a friend with her I don't have her venmo memorized but go find her venmo and send her money i wonder if i could find it i bet if i looked it up right now on twitter i could find it even though i'm trying to stay off twitter that's another concrete action you all can do stay off twitter huh whoa now buddy here's her Venmo here's her Venmo

Trill TBT T-R-I-L-L-T-B-T go give her money you can give me money too but I don't have Venmo to give you yeah I'll take some money too

if y'all just giving it out the fucking Trump bucks actually my Venmo to give you. Yeah, I'll take some money too if y'all are just giving it out at the fucking Trump box. Actually, my Venmo is at Tom Sexton if you're so inclined. See, I can remember it easily. Shit. Alright. Well, go

support us on either Venmo or Patreon. Doesn't matter. Thanks for listening, everybody. Oh, here's a way you can support me. Go to Spotify. Go listen to my band, Tenure, and help us get some of those listens so that we don't look like nobodies. We are nobodies, but

maybe if you want to put the I mean, Justin Bieber told his fans remember when he told his fans to just put his song on repeat for like 12 hours? Yeah. Pencil weapon listens, folks. Go to Ten fans to just put his song on repeat for like 12 hours? Yeah. Pencil weapon listens, folks. Go to tenure and just put your shit on repeat for 12 hours so we can get some listens. And also 37 cents this year for those listens.

Yeah, I did the math. Well, I think that you get paid like.0038 cents per stream on Spotify. It's pretty bleak. But, you know, if you get like a million streams, that's like $70,000. That's pretty good money. We need a million streams. All right. So, yeah, that's tenure.

T-E-N-U-R-E. Like that shit you get at university. On Spotify. Tom, anything you want to plug? Oh, God. What have I got going on? I don't know. Venmo me money at Tom Sexton.

I'm going to get into the shameless begging racket. Oh, shit, dude. Before I let you go, I've got to read you this sign from these protesters protesting in Frankfurt today. Everyone is essential. How about you social distance from my constitutional rights? That's just proof that they're just so bad at comedy because the joke there is social distance away from my nuts or something you know what i mean right right um people willing to give up liberty for temporary safety deserve neither i'm glad i'm glad you feel that way. These people aren't in any way practicing social distance.

We're going down in flames, man. Reigning the governor, unbridled Kentucky. Are these Matt Bevin's paid thugs? Are these the bellboys? Dude, they're so fucking dumb.

Okay, well, go with God. Try to avoid the MAGA protesters. If you see an F-35, an F-350 barreling down your road, hide. Yes. All right, well, we'll see you soon. We'll see you on the Patreon. We'll see you in church on Sunday. Yeah.

All right. Later. Peace.