Trillbilly Worker's Party - **UNLOCKED** The Thirst Is Taking Over

Episode Date: March 23, 2021

We're unlocking this Premium episode for you, in which we discuss the now-famous Skillet-Cardi B-Hitler controversy. Enjoy! If you'd like to hear more content like this, go support us on Patreon at: www.patreon.com/trillbillyworkersparty

Are you? Yeah, I got a house full of cute femmes and incredible fluffy dogs. So that's really all you can ask for. On this spring day. Fresh spring day. It is a beautiful outside, thank God. I need it. I might fuck around and throw some weeds out of my yard today.

Oh, my God. You know it's a special occasion. Tonya Turner's going to eat pie factories in the pie. Or eat pies in the pie factory. I made waffles for breakfast. I had big waffles the size of my head for breakfast what are you drinking is that topo chico my god they brought they brought tidings from the city we've lost you to the dogs y'all there really is a dog here but um that is oh i forget what kind of dog he is but he's like big he's like he looks

like the suffolufagus on sesame street he like weighs over 100 pounds this dog i want to marry this dog god damn he is a whore you think like he's a horse in this house my little double wide over 100 pound dog shuffling around the double-wide with three little ankle biters. Show us this hound. Well, they're all outside right now, except Sassy. She wouldn't go outside. Of course, she would not.

She has tried to alpha a dog over 100 pounds, like a shaggy, shaggy gorgeous snuffleupagus dog sassy has snapped and barked at him multiple times like she would top this dog and hump him if she could but she is quite literally the size of one of his paws she's psycho she's absolutely insane anyway anyway damn anywho I would live on a dog farm if I could I think I think I wasted a lot of my life not being a dog person like not connecting with dogs in a real way

you know what I mean have I said this to you all before no have you watched isle of dogs i don't think so and you're not connected with dogs in an authentic way yet oh you need to do that isle of dogs okay i'll watch i have watched hotel for dogs that's a good one too um yeah i just spent years thinking that dogs are just like a lot too much work and like dirty or something and i think my mom my mom did this to me because she wouldn't let us have dogs in the house but now i like don't think there's such thing as too many dogs i think

i'm just gonna end up being like an old witch on the hill with like 80 dogs up here. I don't know what to do about it. You're just trading in cats for dogs. I mean, I like cats, too, but cats don't love you like dogs love you. They just don't. Cat love is conditional. This little cat of mine learned it last night. She slipped outside, and I didn't know it.

Oh, my God. Then I just heard something go, I was like, what is that? And I opened the door. I was like, yeah, you don't like it out there, do you? Ain't nobody to feed you out there. She needed that dose of reality, Tom. That's probably right.

Did you panic? Did you go into panic? Helicopter daddy? Hell, I didn't even know she was out there. How'd she slip out? I don't know. I think I was taking some trash out. She kind of had timed it for the door shut to kind of wiggle out.

I just didn't see her. Well, my cat goes out. She's outside bathing in the sun right now, living her best life. I wish she'd shit out there and let me get rid of this goddamn litter box. But she just likes to go out there in the sun. All the animals in this house choose to live here the gates open they can go to do whatever the fuck they want they come back every night this is where they want to live undeniable but yeah i mean someone told me this one time and i don't know if it's true

obviously but they said like if you die in your house a dog will lay down and die with you the cat will eat you to survive no the dogs will eat you too that's a lie stories abound of like uh even like people's dogs like eating their toes off that are like have diabetes and don't have any sensation in their toes. Shit like that. And them just not knowing their dog's literally chewing their toe off. Anything will eat you, yeah. If it's faced with starvation, it will eat you. We would eat each other. Probably we'd be like a goddamn Chilean rugby team.

Buddy, I think I got probably some juicy thigh meat. I think I got a thigh that would probably season and fry up real good just saying i'm don't eat don't eat me first though goddamn i probably wouldn't hack it i'm too high maintenance in an apocalyptic situation i mean i have a go bag that's a fucking joke it's got like wet wipes in it and ammunition like this is nothing it's just nothing of use you and wayne fleming too high maintenance for a survival situation. It literally has a pair of clean panties and an extra menstrual cup. That's what's in it.

That's my only worry is that I'm going to like bleed all over myself and not be able to clean myself. No water, no food. My only concern is menstruation. I mean, it is a concern well i've been recording i don't know that this video this is gonna make the cut but good morning it's all going in good morning um listen to this thing i just found i don't really know where to put it or what to do with it but it was an interesting story i found on Wikipedia this morning. The Wikipedia page is just titled Chopper Ghost. Ghost is in parentheses.

Chopper was an alleged ghost living in a dentist office in the city of Neutrobling near Regensburg in Germany. In the summer of 1981, Chopper started appearing in phone calls made by the dentist. He spewed insults with a distorted voice and only appeared to be nice to the then 16-year-old dental assistant, Claudia. I'm imagining a catty ghost that just hangs out around the water cooler talking shit about claudia that's a great name claudia the ghost was nice to claudia actually the only one

oh the good claudia was the only one that the ghost was nice to the ghost whisperer ghost was trying to smash always um at some point the dentist called the police to find the source of the supposed person terrorizing him during phone calls the german bundespost replaced the entire telephone wiring and installed technical traps to find the source of the voices the police checked the vicinity for possible illegal radio broadcasts. Later, the voices started to come from sinks, toilets, and sockets in the dentist's office as well. Despite sending 60,000 Deutschmarks to uncover the source of the voices, neither the police nor the Bundespost were successful in finding the source of the voices neither the police nor the bundespost were successful in finding the source as such the police handed responsibility over to the criminal police

who founded the special unit soco geist i don't know what that means sounds like drain flies to me coming from the pipes what the fuck's a soco ghost maybe it's like a police so like a guy i guess geist would be like a poltergeist right so maybe soco is like a a police unit so maybe it's like the ghost hunting unit in the police department i think this was probably guys does that mean like river ghost that beer company spirit cops of the spiritual realm cops i will not i will not about this tanya you never watched ghostbusters what do you think those were those were ghost cops damn peter vinkman ghost cop i got if you're truly a cab you have to be against ghostbusters this is true i'd never considered it before but you're right i gotta i need a month off to consider this

i gotta go i gotta log off um this has fucked my whole worldview up the criminal police hoped to solve the case quickly but by then the story of the ghost spread all over the world. Journalists from the USA, Japan, and even New Zealand appeared to let Claudia showcase the ghost. Several newspapers offered exclusive contracts to Claudia. The magazine Stern offered her 120,000

Deutschmarks. Even parapsychologists came to visit the dentist's office and speculate about the nature of Chopper. The criminal police searched 55 neighboring apartments, made ultra-voice measurements in the sewers, and even high-frequency physicists built up their measurement devices. However, they all could only record the voice, but not discover its source. So, here's when we get to the tab on wikipedia that says discovery of the fraud

damn man i wanted to believe chopper was real the policeman noticed how claudia always turned her back towards the people when chopper spoke on like pretty obvious this bitch is a ventriloquist what is it a ventriloquist yeah she's throwing her voice this is like a literal scooby-doo cartoon come to life like at the end they pulled the mask off claudia and she and I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for these meddling soco-gasts and their whatever, electronic whatever.

Ghost detecting device. Is this a Profiles in Courage? I don't know. I'm kind of starting to think it's Getting the Goods because I'll show you why here in a second. I'll tell you why here in a second. Vote on it in the comments is this getting the goods or is this profiles of courage on march the people decide yeah on march 3rd 1982 the policeman noticed claudia's lips moving in

accordance with chopper's words in the mirror. Claudia, the dentist, and his wife were brought to the police station and admitted that they made everything up. The two used the special acoustics of the tiled room and some voice training to create the voices. In a press release the next day, the criminal police showcased how Chopper never existed and how the voices can be easily recreated. The judge determined the motive to be Claudia's... Oh, you all say that now,

but you motherfuckers spent all this time and money going and saying, I can't figure out where the voice is coming from. Literally, yeah. They were all in on it the whole time? Yeah, like you knew it the whole time. It almost lasted a year. This started in summer of 1981,

and the cops... I mean, like, this is... This does show you how absolutely inept the cops are. It took them nine months just to determine that someone was faking this. But also, here's the thing about this. I'm not ready to say ghosts aren't real. I don't know. But if you show up on the scene, and your first inclination is,

yeah, it's a ghost, you, sir, are a fucking moron. Like, you need to eliminate every corporeal possibility before you go there, you know what I mean? Well, when you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail, and I would imagine a Sokogeist or whatever is set on finding the supernatural you know yeah they want it to be there i want i want to believe me too uh no i get it well um so but here here we go um the judge determined the motive to be claudia's need to be admired. So, she was fired, completely retreated from the public, and assumed a new identity. So, I guess you can decide.

Did she get what she wanted? Hold on a second. I just want to point out what a cancellation looked like in 1981 versus now. Today. everybody bitching about like cancel culture like if you did a harmless ghost prank you got canceled at 81 so actually things

have gotten better you have to do something truly heinous to be canceled now that's true yeah you basically have to whip your dick out on 100 women, and it's not until 101 you're in trouble for it. Yeah, like 81? Man, that shit was downright draconian. Cancel culture has lightened up over the years. You're right. This is a lesson in, what do you call it? What is it?

Incrementalism? Incrementalism, yeah yeah that's that's right um no uh yeah you're right i i don't know so i mean so if a little fun ghost hoax and then she had to assume a new identity that's what like yeah they that is that is wonder if there were like german like uh cancel culture cranks in 81 this is uh this is uh so uh i'm just yeah i'm drifting into french i'm sorry you're our german I'm drifting into French. I'm sorry. Terrence, you did. You're a German correspondent. This is so uncalled for. That's what I was going for. They didn't even respect her feeling.

The closest I could do to this is her. You just did Herzog. Her need to be admired. What's her new identity? I don't know. It doesn't say. She's probably still alive. That's the point of a new identity, Tanya.

I'm so sorry. You're out. You're out. My bad. She went into witness protection for this. I was trying to dark on her. She went into witness protection for it. She went into witness protection for it.

Can you imagine, like, there's guys there that, like, ratted out the, like, Gambino crime family. And they're like, oh, what are you in the program for? I did a ghost thing with the new pipes in my dentist office. I threw my voice. How long did this go on? A few weeks? No, nine months. No, you said a year yeah almost not almost

a year shit i i mean i don't know yeah if you uh yeah i don't know where i want to know where the name chopper came from you know what was the why did she use that name for the ghost's name You know, what was the, why did she use that name for the ghost's name? Maybe an ex-boyfriend? Maybe. That's it. What was, what was, what's the new ghost in Ghostbusters called? It's kind of became a meme.

Chomper? Wait, I think so. It's something like that. Hold on. I wonder if there's any correlation between the two. New Ghostbusters. Ghost. If it were getting the goods, what goods did they get?

Yeah, it's Chomper's new ghost. Muncher. Muncher, that's right. Well, the goods were her need to be admired. She wanted to be admired, and that's why she did it. And she was admired the world over. So, I don't understand the need to retreat into obscurity. I don't either, especially at the age of 16.

I mean... So, she was beloved. so she was beloved she also had to pay a fine um to the german bundesbost which is like the german they tried her as an adult they really did this is injustice truly this is becoming a deeply deeply diseased segment about her treatment at a certain point you realize that we're frauds and all of our segments are just the same there's this it's the venn diagram is one circle there's all just yeah what are you gonna do uh well while we're in germany i guess that's about the only segue I can figure out to talk about the latest controversy that WAP has caused. What is that? And there's many. There is a tire.

There are many. How many old white dudes are going gonna ride their coattails to glory well just by shitting on them this was not an old white dude who who was the latest um outraged this was a middle-aged white dude oh you're talking about that skillet guy do you know skillet time you familiar with skillet well i'll tell you why because my sister downloaded the entire skillet discography on my computer in college and i threw a fucking fit what yeah i said which one angel angela she's going through that you know she she's eventually she became a punk but it was a rocky road to get there. She had to start with Christian rock first.

What in the goddamn hell is this? And then she called you down for San GD? I was played twice in this way. First it was Skillet. Angela downloaded an entire Skillet discography. I think what it was is like the early days of Torrance. We didn't really know what we were dabbling in. We thought we were downloading a song.

We got the whole fucking discography yeah i thought i was thought i was downloading uh you know uh whatever album and ended up with uh jenna jameson giving me a for a vr blowjob yeah i'm sure that was a mistake i'm sure that was a little oopsie do but the second time i got i got played like this where someone downloaded an entire fucking discography on my computer was jay may and it was sugar ray oh he straight up downloaded the entire sugar a discography okay hard to say which one's worse, truly. Yeah, truly, it's hard to say. So, for those of you who don't know, this one had a lot of resonance for me. And it is the perfect overlap between mine and your interest, Tanya.

My interest being Christian Rock, washed up Christian Rockers, and your interest being Megan Thee Stallion and cardi b um very interested truly so skillet was a industrial rock band a christian industrial rock band and they still are putting out music uh apparently they're they are quite prolific in fact oh i just i just realized the german connection you tried yes so i didn't want to do it i should know the way to thread the needle that's a good it was a good needle thread the um so skillet was a they were an industrial rock band um and every christian band we me and tom went over this on our sunday service episodes from this time last year but pretty much every christian band was a one-to-one

knockoff of a secular band um yeah so there was like a band called small town poets listen to that band and jenossoms back to back and they're the exact same band. Just one of them has Christian lyrics. Yeah. Or Sonic Flood was a Christian version of Third Eye Blind. I mean, like they were just... It'd be funny if Sonic Flood was the Christian version of Sonic U.

Out of Eden? Out of Eden was the Christian version of TLC. Yeah, yeah. There there were there was like plum that was like the christian version of i think of like 10 000 maniacs you know what i mean like there was a lot of this going on but skillet was the christian version of nine inch nails and i i have always been a huge Nine Inch Nails fan. I love Nine Inch Nails. But their lyrics, the vast majority of their lyrics are about BDSM.

It's mostly about being domed, being chained up, cutting yourself, having someone cut you. I mean, it's just like just like you know it was industrial rock but for skillet to do that they had to sing that they had to do that gimmick in a christian way and so that's how you got songs with names like you take my rights away and um what else did they have? I saw Tanya. Tanya and me both have the same grimace. Kill me, heal me. My favorite is The Thirst is Taking Over.

Love that one. Oh, yeah, The Thirst is Taking Over. Is it about lust? Yeah, it was just like... I mean, just... Industrial rock. Okay, you're gonna play Skillet. We have to play WAP.

I think everyone knows what WAP is. I think everybody's... I think by this... I'm setting up our two... Our protagonists and our antagonists, okay? Our protagonist is Skillet Guy. The antagonist, the villain in this story, is the demonic Megan Thee Stallion and Cardi B.

The angelic presence hovering over all of them is former German Third Reich leader Adolf Hitler. Oh my God, this is just just un this timeline is so diseased these are three things that i i never expected to see written about in the same center yeah skillet hitler and cardi god help us um what are we doing so side tangent i actually saw skillet one time and the year was probably 2001 and uh they had just come out with this album called alien youth um and uh and i saw them in a caliche pit outside of roswell, New Mexico. If you don't know what a caliche pit is, it's just a big hole in the ground.

So it basically looked like a music video they might record. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Like they might be out in the desert and the desert rains come. Yeah, yeah. Water's fucking bouncing off the skins on the drums.

The album was alien youth and they did the this concert outside of roswell which is like you know the alien place i bet they thought that was the edgiest shit in the world well aliens and aliens is a touchy topic in christianity because you know not all christ Christians know where to fall on the spectrum there. You know what? You're so right about that. Talking about aliens,

people would shut down almost as if you suggested the Earth was older than 2,000 years. You know what I mean? You would talk about you believe in aliens, they'd be like, if God put them here we'd already know about them thank you not take any more

questions on that not take any questions that's it's time thank you it's like Jesus Christ but I vividly remember I vividly remember them saying on stage that they were huge X-Files fans and the audience booed them.

They were like, boo! So, my man, I forgot how seriously they took that whole be in the world but not of the world shit in the late 90s, early 2000s. Yep. That's why Christian Rock is's not that's not as true anymore do you think i don't think it's as true anymore because now you see this with um hill song and and who's that pastor that just got we talked about him a few weeks ago the pastor who was like having a multiple affairs and he's friends with Justin Bieber. Oh, Carl Lance.

What was his name? Carl Lance from Hillsong. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now there is much more convergence between secular and mainstream culture, but in the 90s, they were parallel. They did not intermingle. Neither the twins may.

Which is what made CCM fascinating. You had this entire multi-million dollar subculture running parallel with the mainstream secular culture and the a and r guys were paid to pay attention to the secular culture so that the ccm culture could rip it off yes that's exactly right yeah yeah every now and then there were in my own theory about this i've never i've never debuted this on the show or said it really publicly other than twitter but my theory about how this changed is sufjan other than twitter because that doesn't mean information my theory is that sufjan proved that you could be a Christian artist but not be weird about it.

You could just be like, I'm Christian, I believe in God, but I also sing about normal things. Not according to Kurt Franklin. Jesus Freak or bust. Well, that's not... He was on Kanye's album, so even he's

a lot in his stance. Kanye's last album where he used cuss words. That would be inconceivable when I was growing up. It would be inconceivable for a guy like Kirk Franklin to be on Tupac's album or something. A secular rap record. That would never happen. Never happen. But there were, to be fair to CCM, and we probably should do it.

A little teaser. We're mulling doing a deeper dive into this. What's CCM? Contemporary Christian music. I got you. Sorry. should do it we're a little teaser we're mulling doing a deeper dive into what's they see him contemporary christian music it was like i got you sorry i just didn't i didn't know the i wasn't connecting the acronym there were in the primordial lose of christian rock there were bands that kind of poked through that might have started off as kind of trying to i mean starflyer 59 you know started out trying to do like a My Bloody Valentine thing. But they did it well.

But they ruled. Yeah, Pedro the Lion's another one. No, there were moments where there was crossover. And every Christian act did actually want a crossover, with the exception of the biggest Christian act of all time, D.C. Talk. D.C. Talk never wanted to cross over, and they were adamant about it. But they still sold out stadiums,

and that's why they didn't want to cross over, probably. Yeah. Yeah, if they were packing out little shitty rock and roll bars, they would be dying to cross over. Oh yeah, that's who did Jesus Freak, ain't it? Not Kurt right now. My bad. Yeah, DC Talk decided that it was best to be like a big fish in a My bad. Yeah, DC Talk decided that it was best to be

like a big fish in a small pond. Yeah. DC Talk was the biggest Christian pop act at its time and probably since. They attained Hey, what did DC stand for?

I think they were from DC. They were from DC, yeah. I'm pretty sure. Boring. Anyways, I could go on and on for hours about DC Talk, but I won't. Destiny's Child, maybe. Yep. A super group.

Could you imagine a Destiny's Child DC Talk super group? Destiny's Child Talk. In a long enough timeline that will happen. It's honestly not as bizarre as what we're eventually getting at here. That's right. Well yes i saw them i saw skillet take a brave stance for their time that they fucked with x-files and they got summarily booed for it so my man is no stranger to taking brave stances he'll do that he'll do it listen people think jesus was popular when he walked the earth he wasn't they hated them um and so they're gonna hate john cooper too if the band skillet right

so i've narrated narrativized narrated this side of the story tanya why don't you narrate the other side of the story what what did cardi b and megan the Stallion do that John Cooper, a Christian rock singer, despised so much? Well, they released this incredible song, Wet Ass Pussy, months ago. Like, back last fall. Yeah, WAP is not new to anybody. It's not even new. However, their first live performance of the tune because this came out during quarantine was on prime time grammys a couple weekends ago maybe last weekend and um it was pretty

great it was futuristic cardi was wearing this like armor-esque they had a huge they had um the the uh set was a huge stripper heel and the heel the stiletto heel of the shoe was a stripper pole and then right next where cardi and megan met up on that bed to finish out the song wet ass pussy um even though they sang it they sang the edited version they didn't even say the word bucket get a bucket and a mop for this wet wet wet they didn't even say They cut out the word bucket, which I don't get. Is that a window? No, that was a concession for Ben Shapiro. That's the part he found disappointing. It was bucket.

He couldn't deal with it. Yeah, he was like, if your pussy is wet enough to fill a bucket, you should see a doctor. My wife, she's a doctor um yeah so on that bed was a grammy moment to go down in history for sure where the choreography moved them together and where they they did something that could either be called scissoring okay i got a question one well let me let me finish oh no it has to be asked right now while we're on the topic of scissoring for years you and the queer femme community have said no that's nothing we do. And yet, on live TV. That's what I'm getting at. On live TV, two people scissored.

So which is it? They didn't even scissor. It wasn't even a real scissor. That was the point. They didn't scissor. It was a choreography move. And it was actually closer. I mean, it looked gay enough to call it scissoring or whatever we want to call it.

It did it for me. I'll give you that. But what it actually looked more like was. Strong wind, that's for you. You're not wrong. But I did this in high school to flirt with other softball players. We would get down on the floor. You go around scissoring.

You just go around this is this is definitely potential to get me canceled i don't know why it was called this i'm sure it's racist but we called it indian leg wrestling do you know are you with this no one you've not heard of this never heard this before and i'm not cutting it but go on you've not heard of this never heard this before and i'm not cutting it but go on i'm sure it was anyway you just like you lay down side by side you all never did this no well i mean i did other gay stuff yeah you uh boys called it uh boys called it wrestling wrestling yeah exactly exactly no we would say i'd say we'd say let me we'd say let me get you in the figure four leg lock and then yeah yeah inadvertently exactly well this was leg wrestling we'll just call it leg wrestling and you laid down side by side like you know uh uh with your legs like facing opposite directions you interlock one leg and on the count of three

you like tap three and somebody's got to flip somebody else over whatever that you know the strongest one or probably the person who can leverage their body weight better flips the other one yeah and it was pretty fun especially when you were you know drinking like boone's farm as we did and i thought that was the more direction the choreo went it was obviously like a dance choreo but they like locked up like okay this is what actually happened megan like bounce twerked on cardi which was very hot and then their legs were locked in a way where car where megan just flipped back over to be not on her knees and it flipped cardi in a real like it just flipped her real fast and yeah it did it for me and for a lot of man

people uh on prime time which it was it was like like 10 30 at night i mean and so and so after that fox news has been covering this around the clock since for the last week. Well, I'm kind of with John Cooper on it. It is a slippery slope to fascism. At some point, my question is, who asked this motherfucker? How did he even get his opinion about this into the cosmos? Did he just tweet this or something? No, he's got a blog. he's got like his own video blog it's called like he come was he interviewed on fox news about this i'm i don't he may have been but what he wish he's got

like his own video blog called stuff like it's called the cooper stuff i mean it's just fucking it's just so dumb but um well do you think i described that well did i leave anything out you did you did good you're you got the horny one i got the not horny one so you were able to thanks for that tia here's what i wish here's what i wish i wish people like if you're going to be a crank like this can you pick somebody besides hitler to compare everything to because not everything's the reason hitler is hitler is because he was incomparable you know i mean he was uniquely bad right and if everything is just like hitler then it kind of dulls the magnitude of his crimes. You know what I mean?

So I think that's what made him hit the news with this. And we haven't actually even said what he said. He started out and said, he quoted from the book of Isaiah, Woe to those who call evil good and good evil. We're living in a world right now where there are certain Dr. Seuss books that you cannot sell on eBay. They are just too much for anybody to even be allowed to buy.

They're evil, but you can and must applaud the sexual degradation of Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion simulating sex together on the Grammys. This is a perfect example. So far we're on the same page. So far we're on the same page. So far we're on the same page. This is a perfect example.

You must celebrate it. In fact, if you don't celebrate it, you are actually a bad person and you kind of like don't love people. You're actually not nice. Why would anybody ever call evil good and good evil? It's simple because they just redefine the terms the question is who is going to define what is good and who is going to define what is evil

every dictator in history says that what they were doing was good that's what they believe if you go back and read some of hitler's speeches he's like i'm going to set people free free from the bondage of the ten commandments in his mind he's a liberator it's always like that you guys all you do is just redefine evil and redefine good that's what's happening right now on the grass i had forgotten how like uh christians actually think hitler was like anti-christian too like they like they cannot just let everybody else have that oppression they have to say that hitler was against the christians too it's like everybody according to the christians everybody's

against the christians right right truly they they have to be the underdogs even though they basically you know write all the laws and have all the money it's like the world hates you but not for the reasons that you think he said this points to the erosion of the traditional concepts of good and evil as defined by judeo-christian values he said this has been seen over the past five years and especially during the last year oh, he clarified and said that his words were taken out of context. The thing about it is, when you write it out, you're dead to rights, man. And if you say it, you got a little wiggle room. My words that I wrote in complete full sentences were taken out of context.

And recorded on video. Fucking idiot. We can easily be misquoted. That's not what I meant when I said it, but you can't really wiggle out. I was miscopy and pasted. Yeah, you could plead I was taken out of context if, like, paparazzi's asking you something after somebody, your handlers are like shuttling you out of the back of a restaurant trying to stuff you into

a car. Right. When you do your own video blog of your own election, you're kind of at the mercy of yourself there. Oh, God. Oh, dear. Speaking of, before we get too far from the contemporary Christian thing, a very strange thing happened this week. What?

My life has been marked by Oral Roberts, the TV preacher. Oh, dude. I forgot about this. In an exceedingly weird thing, the Oral Roberts basketball team upset Ohio, pulled one of the biggest upsets in NCAA tournament history. Was it? The biggest upset in history? No, it's not the biggest, but it's one of the biggest upsets in NCAA tournament history. Was it? The biggest upset in history?

No, it's not the biggest, but it's one of the biggest. Wait, why? Because they don't usually make it to the tournament? Or because of how much they beat them? 15 C's don't beat 2's that often. Well, I know, but it happens. Isn't there always one? Isn't there always one every year?

No. Like one every 10 years or something the big upset one is always like oh dude i don't know i watched the tournament like once every 10 years you watched it when you lived in the same house with tom and you couldn't get away from it that's right yeah well The funny thing is, a couple weeks before that, me and Brian Quimby did a podcast about Oral Roberts, the man, not the

school, and Brian is from Columbus, where Ohio State is from. Right. Isn't that weird? Isn't that a weird manifestation? Pretty weird. Right. I almost went to school there. Did you really?

Yeah, I almost went there to play tennis. To Oral Roberts? To Oral Roberts. Wow. That's true. And then another time, Oral Roberts prayed. My mom called Oral Roberts. He used to have, on campus, there's this big prayer tower.

It looks like a star or something. And there's prayer warriors that are in that tower 24 hours a day, seven days a week to take prayer requests and pray for people's needs. My mom called that after my Aunt Carol took a pill that was, accidentally took a pill that was like 20 years old oh dude and she went into anaphylactic shop and she called like she had to be like rushed to the hospital like she coded she actually died and they brought her back like it like shut her organs down and shit where'd she find a 20 year old pill i don't know it's like one of

them things where like she just you know kept all of her pills and the same thing and didn't swap them out and it was like it wasn't 20 years i've taken a 20 year old pill the thing about a lot a lot of medicine is like it doesn't it's pretty shelf stable so like it loses effectiveness but it like won't hurt you right right she took like one of the two or three that is like dangerous to take when it's out of date yeah i took a five-year-old muscle relaxer last night still work fine good as new anyway so oral roberts prayed for my aunt on live tv and to his credit she did live so wow to his credit now i think even he would say to glory be the god i mean to god be the or roberts might think he had something to do with it okay he'd take credit not

don't send it up along to the big guy yeah glory be the god the 70s were a wild time or roberts had a medical school fully accredited medical school that you could go to but they taught integrative medicine with faith healing oh my god and like these were like they were churning out like board certified doctors who also had training in like the laying on of hands to heal people so that's like the the clown hospital because laughter is medicine. Right, right, right, right. Right. So all I am saying is that if you're going to have a major surgery done, you may just want to take a glance at your doctor's credentials and make sure they didn't graduate from a medical school in Oklahoma in the 70s. With a funny name.

But since the school has turned to a basketball they lost the the medical school lost its accreditation no surprise there i think maybe in like the early 90s or something but uh but yeah they had they had also had a law school who turned out a graduate y'all might have heard of named michelle bachman uh sam there's some luminaries that came through there ryan tedder of the band one republic was enough oh man well so anyway um so what you're saying is that christian culture has been all over the news just in the last week. Yeah, it's been a big week

for Christians, kind of. Yeah. Because Oral Roberts is a Pentecostal school, not just Christian. I don't even know there were Pentecostal schools, Tom. Right.

Is this the only one? Yeah. Oral Roberts, no, no, no. There's more than that. Let's see. What is Liberty's Baptist? Liberty's Southern Baptist. Jerry Fowler's Southern Baptist.

A lot of Baptist schools. A lot of Catholic schools. Fucking Baylor. Oral Roberts is probably only a Pentecostal school. I know. Baylor's a private Baptist school. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good point.

Did they let you wear makeup at Oral Roberts? I didn't end up going. I just like on his follow-up video, it just says, misrepresented. That's what it just says, big word. Misrepresented over the front. So he's trying to roll back that he compared Cardi B to Hitler yeah he said i'm he said um he said i was speaking philosophically in order to make a point and then using an unequivocal example from the past where someone has traded evil but called it good um he said i'm saying we're in a crisis but

not because of the grammys and not because of cardi b and not because of a music performance or any other musician or artist or band that's not why we are in a crisis what is the crisis why are we in a crisis he says the crisis is happening he said the crisis is this we are redefining what is moral and what is immoral what is virtuous and what is not virtuous and it is going to have devastating consequences for america they said the same thing on Fox News around the clock last week. Candace Owens was on there. And the little bit of clips I saw were always like, this is the poison of America. America is circling the drain.

For people who are so patriotic and pretend to love fucking America so much, they really do seem to hate it. So we are on the same page there maybe we're gonna meet in the middle somewhere yeah america is fucking terrible really awful yeah well i mean for them it's a crisis of culture you know uh instead of a crisis of poverty and violence yeah i want i can't wait till somebody says something like just uses an ob like a mostly obscure reference and it's just like listen if we're going to continue to go down this path pretty soon we're going to end up like robert mugabe's uganda you know pull out an obscure one yeah a deep cut yeah just like seth is like wait

nikolai chowchesku that's where we're heading folks everyone's like yeah yeah yeah okay yeah i got um well let's move on to uh the next topic for discussion today uh i want to talk a little bit about joe biden um because joe biden has not been in the news recently and that's an interesting thing um so there's been a few there's been a few things that has happened where would they put him terrence cardi b is in the news there's not room for the president you can't shoehorn him in you're right there's just no time just not enough time in the day yeah so they um like a week ago there was this story kind of going around about how the Biden administration

basically purged all of its marijuana users. Did you guys see this? I did, but I have a lot of questions. Are you prepared to answer them? I may be a little prepared. Go for it. Did they, how did they, did they drug test everyone?

Or did they do some type of weird social media searches? how did they even find out did did these people tell the feds themselves that they smoked weed that is literally they self-reported it oh man they ratted themselves out was there like a fucking google form sent around and they were like yeah i tried it yeah everybody out there within the sound of my voice i want to tell you one thing i'll tell you exactly like the late great daniel from the late great i say late still around the great daniel dotson told me one time listen you don't volunteer fucking information ever under any goddamn circumstances.

He was working a paternity case, and he went there, and this guy's wife was like, just pissed at him and just said, you stupid motherfucker. You went out with all these old whores and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And Daniel said, here, ma'am, I need to speak to my client real quick. Pulls him in there and shows him the paternity test 99.99999947362 percent chance he's not the father he said you have put yourself through all this he was like i don't give a goddamn if she walked in on you salgeneur by god you tell her you were sleepwalking so no you don't volunteer

information you stupid fucking lanyard dicks ever so that's what they did they volunteered their marijuana use and they were i don't know if any of them were fired but i think a lot of them were put on leave or like moved to other offices maybe some of them were fired but they couldn't get their high level clearances right i can't help but see this as some bizarro like they were all in line for the bathroom or something somebody just came over like how about that straight of weed or some insane stupid laying your dick shit as tom says and they was like coinkydinked themselves out of a job by joking about smoking weed at a water well i think what's going on here it's the story is actually a little more interesting because not they they didn't just self-report themselves they did it under the assumption that

biden would be more lenient wavy gravy yeah that he would be wavy gravy about it and many of them said that they anticipated because like weed is legal or decriminalized it no it's actually legal in um legal to sell in Washington, D.C. and in 14 other states. And so I think that they thought that this is the way the wind is blowing, the tide is shifting towards this way, Biden's going to be cool about it. But Biden was very much okay with it.

This is a man, mind you, that still thinks that soda jerk is a viable profession in this country. What the hell's that? You know, like in the 50s in the malt shops that would like pull the lever oh my god like biden still thinks those people are out there and that's the real america yeah oh my god that's who he's fighting for 15 for as in not fighting for 15 so how many people are we talking i don't know um maybe like a couple dozen there was plenty that's a pretty big hit to an office i mean maybe the white house is huge i guess so i guess there's thousands of people working there i don't know but i think they all got together and rolled a blunt no fuck no they didn't these people are never going to touch marijuana again

they cried themselves to sleep you imagine can you imagine because i understand this mindset okay so i used to have this mindset if i can just get bill clinton's inner circle i'll make something myself i'll get out of this one horse town and they've worked their whole life and they've made all these concessions and compartmentalizations and everything about the way they view the world all to have a chance to suck at the nip of the power teat and only to have a little bit of reefer clip them out of it the last second well uh given all that said i think we should on the off chance that one of them listens to our patreon or a friend of a friend i think we should go ahead and give an

open invitation anyone who was fired from the white from biden's white house for smoking weed has an open invitation on the show to tell their side of the story. Email us at trailbillyworkersparty at gmail.com. I used to work with Biden's, one of Biden's top advisors. Do you remember when, right after Trump got in, there was all those like

rogue White House staffer, rogue Environmental Protection Agency, like rogue. You remember those Twitter accounts protection agency like rogue you remember those twitter accounts that were like popping up yeah they they they won awards those fake twitter accounts are we gonna see something like yeah rogue rogue biden shoom gang oh my god yeah man well hey the universe paid biden back steadfastly when he tried to board a plane the other day my man fell three times going up the steps going going up the steps i didn't even think about how he was going up and how it's fun how much funnier it is to fall upstairs now i know you can like kind of trip a little bit but my man acted like he just got like

fucking legs mortal kombat legs swept up that bitch he was just like trip fell and then got up and then did it again then third time and then when he got to the top he saluted he saluted yeah and i would just think it was it was if it wasn't who it was joe biden i would no it wasn't it it's pretty hilarious oh my god but it's funny that he like did the whole i'm okay here's the salute yeah yeah wow wow wow wow wow and the meme was steph curry crossing him up dude i mean i felt and maybe this is just me being like hyperbolic or something but i really did feel like that was not covered enough like if but if trump fell going up some stairs this motherfucker would be plastered on every goddamn timeline wall to wall i mean it would be everywhere everybody would be laughing about it but biden falls and i have to search it out I literally had to go searching for it because I heard tell of it.

I mean... Yeah. It's like John Dillinger's dick in the Smithsonian. Did Joe Biden really trip up the steps of Air Force One? There's going to be like... You know how like Snopes does those fact-checking things? Like there's going to be a thing on Snopes that's like,

Mick, sure. He did it. I mean... Mick, yeah. They're going to be like, he didn't really i mean yeah they're gonna be like it was he didn't really fall so they're gonna say it was false oh well hold on here's the thing i i'm with you because i keep feeling like uh now it's so bananas to watch the difference in coverage even just watching the uh inauguration was wild listen to them talk about his family right but when you say this don't you

feel like a q anon freak yeah definitely it's like it feels to say this out loud, feels really weird. Well, it's a good way to describe how I feel about saying this next thing I'm going to say. He was absolutely green screened. Oh, yeah. His goddamn hand was floating through the microphone. Well, here's the thing. I don't think it's correct. Who think it's it does make it was green screened there was a video did you know what's the truth i want to know the truth there was a green screened there was a video going around of him approaching some

reporters in front of the white house and it's it looks so fucking fake. It literally looks like a green screen. It's fake one way or the other. Either he's in front of a green screen, or he was walking for real in front of the White House, but they superimposed microphones in front of him. Either way, it looks incredibly fake. And so I think it's fake. It's doctored.

I missed this. What's the point though um them doctor like what were they trying to get across that he's can speak into a microphone i don't know i don't i don't think he's like my my personal theory on this is he's not like good to go at all times like he's probably only got a couple of times a day where he's like four hours of sessions a day yeah yeah where he's actually like who only has like three hours yeah so like so so he's not always available to speak to the press i feel like so they probably have to like film him every now and then and be like all right we'll just go in and post-production put the the fucking mics. I don't know. I could be conspiratorial and digging this,

but regardless, I don't think it takes the tracks from the larger message of this. Yes, it does feel crazy and make you feel like a QAnon person to say these things, but it is true because Trump actively went after the journal journalist class. And they, they came away with the idea that they were in a press group in this country and therefore they feel like biden winning was a victory for their

cause and so they are more sympathetic and easier on him i i do feel like they're easier on him than they were on trump and uh that's why you have to go fucking search it out for when he falls running up a flight of stairs i mean like when he steps on rakes and busts his face like but it is out there i'm glad to hear you say confirm that this is a thing because even on the tl this week some somebody was tweeting about how press journalists are and how we've lost 50 percent of journalists and blah blah blah and like if and it literally ended by saying if this were another group of workers the whole country would be up in arms and i was like careful what you ask for you're gonna be coding you're gonna be coding and beekeeping. Like, what are they talking about?

Yeah, I sympathize with that. But also, it's not like some other job. Okay, so there is definitely a thing where the job of being a journalist is being automated out or venture capitaled out monopolized out like that is a real phenomenon list to cool down yeah uh insensitive then no no no but but the but there are there is a class of journalists that work for the new york times cnn washington post all the major media outlets. And those are the ones who I'm talking about specifically here. Like, Jake Tapper thinks he's part of an aggrieved group.

Oh, yeah, yeah. They are the ones who think that they are basically like Jamal Khashoggi or something. Like, they think that they are being targeted by a malevolent, violent state. You know what I'm saying? And they're speaking truth to power. by a malevolent violent state you know what i'm saying and they're speaking truth to power and and that is why i feel like they're they're more they're more sympathetic to biden because what did he what did he say at his inauguration what did he say like he was going to tell the truth he understood the importance of telling the truth doing away with misinformation on this so nobody tells the truth yeah joe so the the the larger thesis here, the larger theory here is that journalism is dead.

Either they're not, the ones that do still have jobs aren't doing their jobs, and the ones that are good journalists are being, you know, done away with through capitalism. I can't believe Sanders went with trump on that you remember that yes he was just out of it just i can't believe sanders went with trump on that what who said there's footage of this man not being well and we just for some reason we just act like he's well i mean there's overwhelming proof that he's done well have you seen these photos of so i mean like when we're talking about biden you're talking about two different things right like his policies and like the person of who he actually is

i'm speaking i'm speaking specifically of just the person of Joe Biden. But these pictures that they keep putting out on his Twitter feed of him walking through halls, they keep doing this once every two weeks. One week down, one month down, two months down. She's such a good walker. I told you. I mean, it's like Trump. We're going to start getting proof of life videos. He's going to be holding up today's paper.

Well, you know like they have green screening before like did you remember that like dear one like with his uh library in the background he was in the middle of all the shit that happened around oh you're right yeah they just greet like where's joe biden that was like where's joe biden where's joe biden that motherfucker i think 100 had covid and was getting treated somewhere off the grid. Oh, wow. He was just maskless with a bunch of autoworkers in his face. He's like, I don't know.

It's just infuriating, though. Yeah. Well, the press loves him. He he's their boy he's their guy yeah uh for sure and so they're going to give him the benefit of the doubt they're going to help they're going to help him out so how do we talk about this without standing like q anon freaks also let me say this this other thing here like even have y'all been paid attention to like uh like the amazon unionization efforts in alabama and bessemer like i see these headlines that are like amazon warehouse workers and out in alabama

make the final push toward unionizing the effort effort, like the subheading says, the effort has received high-profile endorsements, including from President Joe Biden. Joe Biden actually never did endorse that. He just said he wouldn't call out Amazon by name. He tippy-toed around the whole issue and just said, yeah, we support workers in Alabama is literally all he said. Didn't say he supported the unionization effort didn't name who they were trying to unionize against or any of

that stuff it's like he just gets all workers all workers deserve a union that's like it's what he said yeah like that just like some okay well he just yeah he didn't name any of the like guilty parties by name or anything juxtapose that with bernie's trying to get like jeff bezos to like testify before congress about his horrible business practices right right yeah they're helping him across the finish line basically i mean i mean the the fact of the matter is that in american political life you're gonna come down on some issues with terrible people i mean because this nation is so fucked up and like kaleidoscopic like none of it makes any sense really it's like in 2003 if you oppose the iraq war you probably would have found yourself side by side with someone insane who also opposed it

you know what I mean so it's like I think that like Varg Vikernes of Burzum I think that there's a way to say like the media is in the tank for Joe I mean it doesn't really...

But the thing is, is, like, these liberals make you feel like you're an insane person when you say that. I mean, because... I mean, but they've been saying this, like, that fucking Chomsky book, Manufacturing Consent. What did everybody say? I mean, like, the basic thesis of that book is that, like, there is a liberal consensus in the media. And so that basically verifies all the Fox News people, but it doesn't make it wrong. There is a liberal consensus in the mainstream media. And so what do you do to that?

That's just a fact. That's just the truth of the matter, yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. a matter yeah i don't know yeah well that's uh i got other topics but we're out of time and i can save them for next time uh i got i got a couple of more appalachia centric topics so we'll save those for the next episode um but weren't there any good speak your pieces? I didn't look this week.

Yeah. On the front page of our paper was a big photo of a bunch of toxic heavy metal chemicals in the water. It's laying in here. I should go run and get it. Do you remember what it actually says? it doesn't say anything about pollution it says something changes color of water let me go get it let me go get it oh my god dude that is ridiculous like so fucking pathetic like you want to talk about journalism being dead like truly you look no further than this esteemed former esteemed publication one of the best small town newspapers

in the nation the mountain eagle can't even fucking say now that it was because of a mine okay yeah it just says pollutant. Does it say mine? Does it mention mine anywhere? Exactly. These motherfuckers. The grass calling tree caught the eye of passersby. The river often has this color.

Sorry, none of that was recorded on my end. Whoops. Did Sam write that? Well, you said it was Jennifer honeycutt took the picture the plum much diluted was still visible in the north fork of the kentucky river near the river park okay it does say mine here uh the division of water was called to the creek last week and found manganese in the water apparently caused when apparently apparently there you go caused when flooding caused an abandoned mine to fill up and overflow into a stream that empties into crafts crawlies creek they blamed it on flooding i see

they see always a loophole colors water well i didn't they made it sound like easter egg just come deep easter eggs over here in craft scully that's how it works tanya perfect mint blue christ well journalism's dead folks Christ. Well, journalism's dead, folks. They need to start beekeeping and coding is all I know. Yeah, I guess so. Well, I saw a couple weeks ago the big headline,

and this is the most depressing thing I've seen. The headline was, It's official, KFC coming back to Letcher County. We're celebrating the opening of a Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise as a major economic victory. You might be poor wherever you are in this country. You might be poor, but you are not.

KFC's gonna save us poor. NK. NK. That's the good stuff. God. March Madness has been filled with Pizza Hut commercials and I'm just overcome with despair that they took our Pizza Hut

and just ripped it right out from under us. It's pretty fucked up. And they're replacing it with a KFC. And they want applause for it. I fell in love a number of times with that Pizza Hut. Does that mean Barry's a free agent? I'd like to know.

I literally... He's the best in the business by a mile. Yeah, I mean, this was after my five-year-old muscle relaxer, so maybe that had something to do with it. But I literally was laying in bed last night because I was watching March Madness as I fell asleep that last game where Texas, did they,

Texas got upset, didn't they? Yeah, Texas lost by one point. One fucking point. That was a good game. Anyway, they had those fucking Pizza Hut commercials and i was laying there thinking about barry and where he would land and and i thought about him working

in the heritage kitchen and what a funny what a funny uh situation that would be yeah i don't know i don't know where i hope he gets to retire He deserves it To him working at Heritage would be pretty fucking funny That's what I was thinking last night Yeah How's your bracket How's your bracket doing Tom I'm rolling

You doing good I did call that Tennessee upset Just cause I hate Tennessee So I picked them to lose Oh man I did call that Tennessee upset. Just because I hate Tennessee. So I picked them to lose. Oh, man. I just pick all the southern teams, usually. I don't really know how everybody's actually playing.

If there's a southern and a northern team, I just pick the southern team. Historically, that is problematic. I'm a Confederate sympathizer. Oh, man. See, that could very well be taken out of context. Yes, please someone take that out of context. I just believe in the South. The next episode'll have your face on the cover with misrepresented over the over the front of it forgive me i i apologize for all my sins it's spring we said

anew we're resurrected uh do you care to guess tommy what which tommy number deity j Jesus is who was resurrected around this time of year? I don't know. By what religion? Exactly. Down the line. Many, many, many others before him were resurrected around this time of year. Where are the rest of them, though? Ain't nobody talking

Ain't nobody talking about Plutarch the Destroyer, this big. Say what you want about JC, but my man endures. He does. He did say, I am he that liveth and was dead. Behold, I am alive forevermore. And whether that's literally true or not, he is right. He is alive forevermore and whether that's literally true or not he is right he is alive forevermore we are still talking about dc talk that's right bob the drag queen did say this week

that the best snatch game performance is going to be when someone does jesus christ impersonates jesus christ as a drag queen that That's going to be the best one. Now we're all waiting. Bait of breath on it. When we went to Bristol Rhythm and Roots, I have this picture on my phone I found the other day when I was looking through old pictures. There was a storefront. I don't know if you guys remember this.

There was a storefront in downtown Bristol that had, clearly someone had taken an old Michael Jackson mannequin and put Jesus' clothes over him. And taken an old Michael Jackson mannequin and put Jesus' clothes over him. And so it was Michael Jackson Jesus. I've got a photo of it on my phone. Oh, my God.

I love that. Make that the album art if you've got it. Yeah, I've got it right here. Or the episode art. But put Hitler's head on it. No. Look. I don't know if you guys can see that or not like oh my god let me see let me see look oh i remember seeing that yeah you remember that

yeah as we were leaving yeah so date man check this out how did you have that shot on the draw because i have a i have an album of funny pictures I like. Amazing. This man is organized. That's right. Well, happy spring, you degenerates. Yeah, happy spring. We've made it.

Happy spring. I'm going to be on the Into the Biscuit podcast this week. Well, go check that out Oh yeah I've got nothing to I've got nothing to plug I'm going to talk about my spring rituals and this time of year

Well go check that out, Into the Biscuit And then go tell a friend about the Patreon Well, go check that out, Into the Abyss. And then go tell a friend about the Patreon. If you're here, you already know how to spell it, so I'm not going to spell it for you. Go tell a friend about it. And sign them up.

Five bucks. Not that much money. Otherwise, we'll see you next time thanks for listening peace out see you out there hold me down hold me down trip it on my tongue in my convulsion style Thirst for love

Thirst for your love I could swallow Your beauty whole I could swallow your beauty You alone are what my soul needs And now the thirst is taking over Hardly breathe, I'm an urgent need You know the thirst is taking over Running out

Time's running out