TrueLife - Melanie Waterfall - Metamorphosis

Episode Date: June 2, 2023

One on One Video Call W/George https://tidycal.com/georgepmonty/60-minute-meetingSupport the show:https://www.paypal.me/Truelifepodcast?locale.x=en_US🚨🚨Curious about the future of psychedelics? Imagine if Alan Watts started a secret society with Ram Dass and Hunter S. Thompson… now open the door. Use Promocode TRUELIFE for Get 25% off monthly or 30% off the annual plan For the first yearhttps://www.district216.com/https://divinelightintegration.com/Melanie’s gift is to intuitively hold space for others on their healing journeys to rediscover their own divine light.With over twenty years of experience in various Spiritual and Personal Growth Modalities, with the use of Plant Medicine and without, Melanie guides her clients to heal themselves.As a Addiction Recovery and Psycho-Spiritual Integration Coach, Yoga Instructor and a certified Death Doula, Melanie integrates this background into working with her clients.The training she has done with the organizations, Being True to You, and the Anam Cara Academy, Mindvalley & Trinity Yoga to name a few, along with her own ever-expanding transformational journey all contributes to her style of compassionate coaching.Empowering yourself, seeking help, using Psychedelics all takes courage.Melanie is with you every step of the way. One on One Video call W/George https://tidycal.com/georgepmonty/60-minute-meetingSupport the show:https://www.paypal.me/Truelifepodcast?locale.x=en_USCheck out our YouTube:https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPzfOaFtA1hF8UhnuvOQnTgKcIYPI9Ni9&si=Jgg9ATGwzhzdmjkg

Darkness struck, a gut-punched theft, Sun ripped away, her health bereft. I roar at the void. This ain't just fate, a cosmic scam I spit my hate. The games rigged tight, shadows deal, blood on their hands, I'll never kneel. Yet in the rage, a crack ignites, occulted sparks cut through the nights. The scar's my key, hermetic and stark. To see, to rise, I hunt in the dark. fumbling, furious through ruins

maze, lights my war cry Born from the blaze The poem is Angels with Rifles The track, I Am Sorrow, I Am Lust by Kodak Serafini Check out the entire song at the end of the cast Ladies and gentlemen,

Welcome back to the True Life podcast I hope everybody's having a beautiful day I hope you got to wake up Next to someone you love I hope the birds are singing the sun is shining I got an incredible guest for you today, the one and only Melanie Waterfall from Divine Light Integration. She has over 20 years of experience in various spiritual and personal growth modalities with the use of plant medicine and without. She is an addiction recovery and psychospiritual integration coach, yoga instructor, and a certified death doula.

She has trained with organizations such as Being True to You, the Anam Kara Academy, Mindfully and Trinity Yoga. She also has a hand in five in the Tindaba retreats. And we're going to have an interesting conversation with her today. And I know for a fact you'll be inspired because I'm inspired when I read about her. And I've really been looking forward to this conversation. Melanie, how are you today? I'm well. I am so full of gratitude.

Thank you for having me on today. The pleasure is all mine. I'm really thankful to get to speak with different people who have gone through different journeys and can provide a four. or a background or any sort of inspiration that can help people. And when I was reading through some of your bio and things like that, I felt inspired by there. And I was wondering if maybe you could begin a relationship with the audience by talking a little bit

about your origin story. Like how did you come to be where you are today? Wow. That's a journey. Yes. Well, you know, growing up, my childhood was. Not an easy one. You know, I'm one of those people that was stuck in fight or flight for most of my life.

Both of my biological parents, you know, blessed them. They passed away, both of them from their addictions. And, you know, they each, too, they also had their own traumas. And so when we look at all of that, you know, their parents, handed it down to them and they grew up in a traumatic environment and then they handed it down to me. And I knew from a little girl, just a little girl, that there was something that I was going to be different, that this wasn't going to be my story. But, you know, as a child, we can't really control our environment so much. So when I was 19, I had a big spiritual awakening.

my boyfriend had passed away unexpectedly. And it's an interesting story because he was in the hospital from his injuries, and I was at home sleeping. And early in the morning, I was kind of jolted by this incredible feeling, emotion, energy of unconditional love. And that was not something that I was used to feeling, right? I grew up with a very, very low self-worth, with the belief that I had ruined their lives by just by merely existing. Because, you know, I was an accident when they're young. They were like 18 when they had me, right?

So that was not part of their plans. And so I grew up not feeling very worthy or even understanding what self-love was. And so when I felt this immense amount of energy coursing through my being, it was so overwhelming. And I was so excited to get up and go to the hospital and see my beloved. And that's when the knock came at the door. A few hours later, it was his mother coming to tell me that he had passed away. And I knew in that moment that it was him. And then that was the moment that he had passed away.

when I had felt this, and I'm feeling it again, really, you know, that I understood. And now, you know, reflecting back on that, I really do feel with every cell of my being that that was, you know, a 5MEO reaction. You know, I had released 5MEODMT in my being. And because since then, I've felt that emotion. and it felt familiar to me. I felt that resonance of unconditional love coursing through my being when I sit with this medicine. So long story short, I understood then I became really devoted to a path of spirituality.

This I knew was bigger than myself. And through my grief, you know, I started my search. And so I consumed all of the information that I could possibly do to call my anxiety, to heal my depression, to manage my OCD, you know, and through my life I had experienced, you know, PTSD as well as, you know, from my trauma. So I was really stuck in a state of fight or flight. And it wasn't like regardless of what I did and what I learned and brought into my being, I still. couldn't embody that and overcome my anxiety. So it wasn't until probably six years ago now that I started with MDMA therapy. And that was the first time that I was able to really feel safe in my body. I didn't have that gnosis in me yet. So all of that information that I was

consuming and, you know, doing my yoga teacher training and all the medication and all the things that I was doing to try to manage my anxiety all fell into place. And shortly thereafter, I also started my relationship with 5MUDMDM as well. And that's when it really, really landed in my being. And I was able to start to really live life from a new set point. It created a whole new set point in my being on a cellular level. So I took off those glasses of anxiety, you know, and I saw life through a different lens. And it gave me a new way of just perceiving life. And it was, that's, I feel like that's when my life really began.

I was able to, you know, it changed everything in my life. Every relationship I have has shifted. And I'll just be deeply, deeply grateful for these medicines. It's beautiful. It's, you know, you use another word that really kind of leaped off the page when I read it. And it was metamorphosis. And it sounds to me like you've just described what metamorphosis is. It's a powerful thing.

It's can you see a big difference or what are some of the, sometimes when we think of metamorphosis, like we think of a caterpillar becoming a butterfly or we think of a, you know, sometimes a snake shedding its skin, almost like a death and a rebirth. Is that how you feel? Do you feel like it's almost like a rebirth the way you are today versus the way you were? Oh, 100%. 100%. I mean, I could feel it as it was happening. You know, when I speak about that little voice that I had inside of me when I was a little girl, that was the voice that was rising up in me. And that was the knowing that I had within me that this is the right path.

This is my path. And it has been my path and devotion ever since. I've not looked back. And as I unfold and continue to unfold, you know, it's a beautiful, beautiful experience. You know, I look at my trauma and I look at my PTSD and anxiety and OCD in a whole different way now. They were there to protect me. You know, and they were doing their job of protecting me. And, you know, for that, I thank them.

And now I can, you know, move on without them. And, you know, it's not to say that I'm completely anxiety-free. I mean, anxiety does have its job and its role in our life. But I can tell you that going from two, three panic attacks a day to maybe three or four a year is very welcome, you know. And now I have really implement the tools that I've learned. over the last 25 years on a more grounded and effective manner, too, that they stick. It's beautiful. You know, it's always fascinating to me when I get to speak with people and they talk about

their traumas. And then I can't help but think these things that are traumas. And the way you described them is like, now I thank them. It's these tools, these tragedies, and these traumas. that give us the lived experience to help other people through those traumas. Do you credit some of the things that you've been through for the success you're able to currently have with your clients today? Yes.

I mean, you know, I've been through it. Right, right. I've been through it. I've experienced physical abuse, sexual abuse, financial abuse, emotional abuse, emotional abuse, you know, for many, many years. And it was actually what I was drawn to. I was repeating these patterns not knowing what I was doing. And so when, because I had such limiting beliefs.

And these medicines help us to truly kind of take a different perspective and look at our beliefs and uncover what is no longer serving us. And, you know, we don't have to relive the trauma to be able to heal it. That's a great point. Right. And so when we come to this. concept of metamorphosis, you know, that caterpillar consuming and just, you know, struggling to, to continue to live. And it's just going about a stay. It's not really thinking about anything. It's just, you know, eating and consuming. And then we have this opportunity

to dissolve in the, in the experience, you know, in the, in the cryalysis, in the cocoon, we turn into total goo. And that's really, what happened for me. You know, those, these medicines, they have this way of, you know, shaking up our, our, our minds and our thoughts and our, on our neural pathways and creating a nice, clean slate for us. And so with guidance, you know, I was able to do that and start to implement and really land those beliefs that do serve my higher purpose.

And release what is no longer serving me. and thanking it for getting me to this point. And so when I am with my clients, I have that understanding, that relatability, because I've been through it. Right. And I understand. And I think that that offers me a deeper level of compassion,

you know, and noses. And I felt like, you know, if I can get through this really, truly and come out on the other side, then who am I to not? Like I must help and be of service to help others. I never thought that I would be, you know, anxiety free. I tried the drugs. I did the therapy.

I did it all. I tried it all. And nothing landed. I couldn't make that connection in an embodied way until I sat with. And I didn't know what I didn't know either, right? And I still don't, right? The more that I learned, the less that I know. So this is also a beautiful thing because I have a very curious mind and I love to learn and I love to explore consciousness.

And so I really love to sit with my clients and witness their unfolding. It just brings me immense joy. It brings me to this idea of courage. Like you spoke about having a voice inside of you, the little girl that was speaking to you your whole life. And then all of a sudden there's these defense mechanisms that come. up, whether it's anxiety or OCD or these things. Maybe you could, can you talk a little bit about courage and like, what is it that gives

you the courage to finally, not only listen to that voice, but take action with that voice? I knew there was this, that, that voice telling me that I'm not going to continue the cycle. I'm going to be the mother to my children that I wanted for myself. I want to be a source of love. And so therefore, I must listen and honor that each and every day. It's not just a wake up one and done, right? This is a path of devotion. This is trusting my intuition, stepping into my intuition.

Ultimately, this is, you know, we all need someone to believe in us, but it starts with us. We must believe in ourselves. That's so true. Yeah. And so I had to have that deep belief and I had to step off. I feel like I'm doing that all the time, stepping off that edge, you know, and into my growth. And it's a beautiful gift. And the more I do it, the easier it gets.

Right? because I have that deeper trust, that self-love now. So. Yeah, I love it. It's sometimes I think of it as a pattern. And like we think of ourselves as patterns. And a lot of us grew up in maybe not having the same difficulties, but all of us grew up with some difficulties.

And it becomes, I think the first step is like being aware of this pattern that is not fulfilling, whether it's a job you go to, maybe it's a relationship. Maybe it's some sort of negative thought loop. But it's this pattern. And if you're conscious with it, and a lot of the times when you sit alone and you're by yourself, these patterns, you can hear them, you can see them, you can feel them. And it's very scary to step outside your pattern. And I think that this is where the idea of courage comes in.

Like, courage isn't doing something without the absence of fear. Anybody can do that. Courage is doing something despite the fear. And it's overcoming this thing. And that is what breaks people's patterns. This idea of, okay, this is really scary for me. And it doesn't matter how insignificant someone else thinks it. It's scary for you.

It's scary. And you shouldn't be afraid of it. You should embrace that and take a step towards it. And once you begin doing that, all of a sudden, you begin to reshape that pattern small at first, but then bigger and bigger. And pretty soon, you, Melanie, or me, George, have become radiating this new pattern. And people see it. And it's such a beautiful thing. And that is one of the things that really drove me to want to talk to you is the fact that you have rearranged your pattern, the fact that you understand the relationship between the mind, the body, and the soul and relationships in general.

And maybe we can shift gears and talk a little bit about relationships. You have another great quote that I really like that is holistic spiritual health and the relationship between the body, mind, and soul is a profound, infinite unfolding of your greatest potential. lot in there. Maybe you could just start by kind of unpacking that quote a little bit for us. Yeah, that's a big one. It's just a lot in there. You know, when we connect and get still, that truth comes up. And when we talk about courage, it is, it's courage. And I think that that's a muscle we use. This whole journey is practicing. This whole journey of being a human is just is practicing, stepping into, for a higher purpose each day if we listen, right?

And when we are looking at our experience here from a holistic level, like I talk with my clients quite a bit about their diet, not just what they eat, but what they watch, who they are around, how they live their life, you know, their, what are they taking into their being? And, you know, a lot of what we, society is, is projecting upon us is quite the opposite of what we need to really reach our highest potential. And so when we get still and really begin to take radical responsibility for our lives, and I say that with deep, deep compassion, because that is fundamentally what is required to, walk this path is deep compassion for ourselves and for our others. So when we look at,

you know, our traumas and the things that have been done to us, you know, it's usually, you know, that saying is so true. Hurt people, hurt people, right? And, you know, when I stopped to look at, say, my parents, you know, my mother, who was very abusive to me, I see her suffering. I see her pain that was causing her and the projections that she was, you know, putting on to me. And so I've been able to really,

truly forgive her and understand her suffering. And so when we can look at life through a lens of, you know, this person who's projecting this is suffering somehow. And yet I, because I've created this safety, within myself, I know I am safe. I don't need to respond to that outer, you know, influence of someone else's projections. And so that has really been a big piece of my own

healing. It's just trusting myself. And so when we do that, the connections start to come. When we get still, when we trust ourselves, when, you know, I think 5MEODMT has played a role in that for me. The nosis that I am, I belong to, I am from source energy. And so it strips away everything, my identity, my, my ego, my, my, my outdated beliefs. And so when we practice bringing those new beliefs systems, you know, that are more in alignment with our higher purpose, you know, we practice that each day. And, And life begins to become smoother. It's not so, right?

It's nice. It's more of a flow. It's more of a flow. And we can identify and remove ourselves from situations that are no longer serving us that do not feel in alignment. And it becomes easier when we practice honoring ourselves. Yeah. That's well said. It's so interesting to think about the relationships there.

And the relationship with we have, the relationship we have with ourselves is, is how the world sees us. I know that's kind of a mindful thing to say, but it's so true. It's, for some people who may have never worked with plant medicines before, Melanie, like, and I know words fail here, but maybe we could talk a little bit about the experience it's like to work with plant medicines. Maybe you could start by talking about some of the plant medicines that you use and how you feel them to be effective. Well, they're not all plant medicines that I work with. I mean, MDMA has is not a plant medicine. Some may consider it not to be even a psychedelic, you know, but it's certainly a medicine. And it certainly has, you know, really helped me to create a new set point in my being to learn to trust that set point.

you know, 5M-E-O-D-M-T, again, you know, you could use the Bufo-Lvaryous version, the Toad, but I prefer to work with the pure molecule myself. And that has been my biggest teacher, my biggest tool towards reclaiming my, you know, my relationship with my divine being. You know, I work with cannabis. I work with, you know, that was my biggest. teacher for quite a while in terms of, you know, my PTSD and anxiety. It really did help me to sleep well and to manage my, my anxiety levels to stay grounded. You know, and I also work with

HAPA in a very meditative ceremonial way as well, and a beautiful teacher, beautiful teacher of insight and and assistance. So these are my specific. You know, I also sit with, Washuma a few times a year, but integration in between these medicines is really where the work is done. You know, I can't stress enough about the importance of, you know, also preparing for these experiences. Because we're not just going in and having this experience and then coming out and expecting to be like, boom, okay, I'm better. Life is different. This is a journey. It's a journey in itself, you know, from shore to shore, from beginning the preparation, setting the intention, choosing who you want to work with and feeling safe with their vibration.

I mean, what I discuss with my clients and I encourage my clients is this is beginning to unlock and strengthen your intuition and trust in yourself. So this is a journey of returning to yourself. So this is why I called, you know, my practice divine light because it is a returning to your own divine light. And that's where the wisdom is. We all have the wisdom within us. But it's just layered. It's layered by trauma.

It's by layered by outdated beliefs, generational patterning. You know, so when we can take off those layers and get to the real truth, this is when we get to our wisdom and we get to heal ourselves. Right. Yeah. It's a, it brings up a a question that I have. How do you decide, like if a client comes to you hypothetically, how do you decide or do they decide which medicine to work with? Well, you know, I think that is a very personal experience for everybody. You know, I don't work with all medicines. mostly I'm an integration specialist, you know, where I help people. I'm a coach. I don't necessarily, there's not a lot of focus on the past. It's about creating the life you love, right, coming into your true divine self.

So, you know, I'm here. I'm like your spiritual cheerleader. You know, I see that divine light in all of us. And I'm here to, you know, tease it out of you and encourage that. and remind you of your, the strength of your intuition. And so that's my, my real goal, really, is to just hold space, hold a very beautiful, safe container of compassion and non-judgment while, while you explore your inner being.

And, you know, we all have a journey. We all come to the medicine with our own unique path and our own unique journey. And yet, you know, there are some familiarities where we can. relate to one another and go, oh, yeah, yeah, I've been through that or, you know, and this is what I did to overcome it. And here's some tools that I use to, to help me to stay in the moment, because if we take away the past and we take away the future, what we're left with is right now, right now, this moment. And so this is, this is my focus is continually coming back to this moment and what is true. What is true in this moment for us? So when we can get still and really look and listen

and do that beautiful self-inquiry, usually it comes back to love, that we are beings of love. And so this is the path that I hold for others to walk with me along, is to discover their own true, you know, connection to their own self-love. And I think that not, it's not for everybody, right? It's not, these medicines aren't for everybody. And they can cause, without proper preparation and integration, they can also cause disruption in one's being. And it takes a while, you know, we are on this journey.

It takes a while to integrate these new energies into your being. And this is where I help, you know, help others to land that and to get grounded in who they are and feel safe in who they are. Yeah, I love it. It's a beautiful way to describe it. I'm curious, I've taken a few different kinds. Like I'm familiar with MDMA. I'm familiar with psilocybin.

And I know that those two particular medicines have a lot of different energies about. You know, for me, MDMA is really something that can help you form a relationship with someone else. Like it seems that there's this, for me anyways, it seems to me that it really helps me see the light in other people where psilocybin for me is much more introspective and it helps me see larger patterns

and it helps me see myself as part of the planet as part of this whole creation rather than being away from it. And I'm wondering if as someone who works with integration, Are there different integration strategies for different medicines? Oh, definitely. You know, integrating, I mean, they each have their own essence, their own spirit that they bring to us, like you were saying, you know, like MDMA can be very heart opening and relational and you want to be close, you know, and psilocybin. And I love these two medicines together. You know, they really provide a beautiful.

beautiful harmony to one another. And, you know, psilocybin is very grounding and earthy, right? It contains all that mycelium and that earth, earthly knowledge that that we all need, I feel, you know, that can't get enough of that, that earthly knowledge is, you know, there's a lot of wisdom there. And, you know, like a medicine, like 5MEODMT, it has a much higher, much potent, or very potent vibration to it. And so, you know, it's true when they say, you know, sitting with 5MUDMT is like 10 years of therapy in 30 minutes. Yeah, that's different to, you know,

integrate into your being. That takes a little bit more knowledge and, and really devotion to understanding and unpacking all of that. It's like, you know, when someone comes to me, sitting with 5MODMT, it's like, I explain it like, you know, it's like this champagne bottle or the champagne bottle and the cork pops off and it explodes all of our beliefs or limitations or, you know, all of our traumas, everything just explodes out and all these bubbles and all these bubbles are coming to the surface and we just are exploring them. Some of them are just easy and they flow away. You know, some of them need to be explored a little bit more and unpacked a little bit more, right? And so each time we work with this medicine, maybe there's some more coming out,

but it's not quite like the first time, I think, you know, in my personal experience anyways. But we continue unfolding. We continue to unpack. And, you know, we gather tools along the way that help us to identify and release what is no longer serving us. So it's going to be different for each person and I meet my clients where they're at. You know, some come to me with deep traumas. I have clients that have lost children. I have amputee client. I have clients that have been very sexually abused that have grown up in cults,

that like everybody has their own story. I have people that are coming to just continue their spiritual exploration, you know. And things come up that they weren't expecting. that come up, you know, or how do I get unstuck? I'm feeling really stuck and I don't know where to go or, you know, what to do with my life. And it's just, I'm feeling heavy. I'm feeling this weight of life on me. Why can't I enjoy life? I have new moms coming to me. I mean, that's big, you know, any of these life transitions that come up for us, you know, how do we become the best version of ourselves in those experiences? Use them as lessons, you know, to learn.

Rather than it's happening to me, we take radical responsibility for our life. And that's no big thing. Or, I mean, it's a big thing. You know, it's when we kind of, when that happened to me, it was like, oh, I'm the creator of my life. Oh, God, I'm, I created all this. Oh, wait, wait. Oh, wait. I'm the creator of my life, you know?

And then it became exciting and inspiring. because each day we wake up, we have this beautiful blank canvas, and we get to decide. Get to decide. And so where are we making that decision from? Are we making that decision from a place of anxiety? Or are we making that place from, you know, a connected place within our being?

It's really well said. It reminds me of, on some level, I see what's happening today. It's almost like this archaic revival of life. Like it's like there's these explain it seems to me like some of the situations which you've explained about people coming to you are almost like rights of passage. And it seems that for so long in the West, these particular rights of passage have been buried or pushed to the side or said that they aren't important. But every one of those things you explained is a life changing situation. And why it's just so the more that you think about it, it's so obvious that we need help when these situations come.

No one's teaching us this stuff. You don't learn that in school. Right? It's pretty amazing to think about. What do you think about that? Yeah. I think that, you know, it's, well, I mean, as I'm entering into my crone stage of life, right? That itself is a right of passage.

Right. They're, you know, especially in this society where, you know, staying young is the ultimate goal. Aging gracefully is, is. not, you know, it's not one of those things that is valued. And I say, no, no, I'm here to age gracefully, to embrace each day with with humility and gratitude. And so that I may be a source of that inspiration for others and hold space for others to accept their own.

And again, it's as we step into these transitions, and I can only speak for my own experience as a young woman, you know, a little girl, a young woman, a mother, you know, and now entering into this this crone phase of my life, where are our gifts and seeing life from that perspective rather than it's happening to me and I have no control. We take our power back. and we step into a knowing of our purpose that we have something of value to offer. And so, you know, and staying curious, I think, is a big piece. So when we have someone holding space for us that is non-judgmental and compassionate,

as we, you know, navigate these transitions in life, it can be a lot. easier, a lot more productive rather than trying to go it alone. Right. Because how, you know, if we don't have our tribe around us, and I think that that's one thing that I'm like, I can say that I'm deeply, deeply grateful for, you know, is the tribe of people that I've, you know, I've surrounded myself with. I feel so grateful for the people that I work with my colleagues and, in, this, you know, we're all have this devotion to being of service and, and helping guide others

into, you know, remembering their own divinity. Yeah, it's so important to think about that. And it, you know, it's almost fractal in a way. When you're young, you have like this peer group of people. And then, you know, you think, okay, well, I outgrew this peer pressure kind of stuff. But then you get older and you, hopefully everybody struggles to become the best version of themselves. And when they do that, that when you become the best version of yourself or when you're working towards it, you attract into your life other people that are in the same particular space. And it's just, it really blows my mind to think about how that cycle continues to

unfold in front of us. And I have a, I have a question for you. As someone who is going through their own right of passage, normally we tend to think that people we go to for help have already, and this is misguided, but we tend to think that, oh, well, they've already solved all these problems. but nothing's further from the truth.

These people are just working on a different set of problems. And I'm curious as someone who has helped a lot of people who has a beautiful outlook on life. And maybe how do you find yourself protecting the idea of judgment? Like it seems to me that, at least for me sometimes, I still find myself being pretty judgmental. And I guess if you were to speak to that, what are some ways a person can try

and alleviate that idea of judgment. You know, it's something that can be toxic. We all do it. It's natural on some level. I think it helps in some ways, but it can't be something that hurts us. How could you speak to that? Well, it comes back to self-love.

It really does. When I look in the mirror and I see who I'm, who's reflected back on me, how am I judging that person? And it goes back to earlier in this conversation when we were talking about, you know, hurt people, hurt people. And where, what is the lens that we're looking through? So if we're judging others harshly, that is a reflection of ourselves. Right.

And so when we are looking at through a lens of compassion, we're also bringing that back onto ourselves as well. So if I can see and feel the pain in others, you know, one of my biggest life lessons is to not take it personally. Boy, that was a huge one for me. Wow, that provided so much freedom. Yes, that was a celebratory landing of that one, right? Not take it personally.

And really, we all have this version. You know, I'm going to have a different version of you than your daughter does. does, you know, or your coworkers do, you know. So this is when we come into judgment, I mean, we don't know other people's stories. We don't know. We only have this one version of them that we are interacting with in that moment. And so, you know, to what other people think of me, you know, is I can't, I can't control that. People are going to judge me.

You know, people are judging us right now. And that's okay. That's okay because that's what's going on. That's their story that they're forming of us. But it's really, it's none of my business to hold that and to not take it personally. I can't accommodate everybody's judgment of me. What I can do is really focus on how I hold my own self,

my own integrity, how I walk this path. And it may not resonate with others. It may resonate. with some. And for that, I'm grateful. But it's not going to resonate with others. And that's okay. There's no judgment because they're on their own path. And we all go at our own pace. Some are faster. Some are slower. Some are at a standstill. Some are like, you know, accelerated. It's, we're all at our own pace and we're all doing our own, our own thing.

So if we let go of judgment and, you know, I mean, yeah, we're human. We have the opportunity to experience every emotion available to us. And I think it's important to do so, you know, to understand these emotions, but not be the emotion. So don't be the judgment, right? That's a lot of weight to bear, actually, just judgment. You know, so there's a lot of freedom releasing judgment. And if we can look through a lens of compassion, it just makes life so much easier. because we do invite that vibration back to us.

That's really well said. You know, I love the idea of the mirror and that the things we see in other people are the things we recognize in ourselves. You know, it's really freeing to think about that. And it does help release the anger or the judgment or some of the negative emotions. Maybe it changes the balance of the relationship, right?

Maybe we could speak to that a little bit. When I say the word balance to you, what do you think of? I think of lack of struggle. That's so well said. Right. And what is our relationship with struggle? How finely tuned are we in our life when we see things coming out of balance? Work balance, family life balance, balance with our own relationship with ourselves, our diet, all of it.

it's all this one big pie and how much of our energy are we giving to any given aspect of our life, right? And putting about some require a little bit more energy at times, you know. And when we're finally tuned into our being and our intuition, you know, we can sense those subtle differences. We can sense that this is out of balance and we can gently come back into balance and understand. And so this is, you know, coming back into honoring ourselves in each and every moment, listening and feeling that subtle shift in our own vibration where we can become still and pause. There's so much in the ability to just pause in each moment when we feel ourselves coming out of balance and invite that gentle inquiry into ourselves. Is this true for me? you know

so it's a daily practice you know devotion to being balanced yeah I love it I think that when I think of balance I think of like a guy

walking on a tightrope between two buildings and you know how like your arms get all crazy you know and it takes so much energy because you're like ah and then you start thinking I'm going to fall look way down there as soon as you get out of balance Like everything, the plate stops spinning, the poles come falling down. And it's interesting to think, it's just interesting to sit in silence and think about balance.

And just silence has the ability to balance you at times. Just like you said, it's really well said, and it's beautiful to think that a pause, re-shift, focus your weight over here, think about what's important, and then you can start moving again. it seems it seems to me too in our society that we have decided that silence is something to be afraid of you know sometimes there's that silent pause in a conversation or sometimes we automatically think people are judging us when they're silent when maybe they're just reflecting what do you think is the relationship between the lack of silence and maybe the illness of our society is that even a thing I love that question. Yeah, I think it's something there.

Yeah, well, you know, I reflect back on my own journey and my anxiety was really linked to, you know, my chatter. If there was, oh, boy. And, you know, how grateful I am to be able to sit in silence. if we're not, if we're talking, we're not listening, right? If we're busy trying to take up all the airspace, we're not available. We're not truly in the moment. We're over here or we're in the past and we're relating something from the past. And so being able to be very present in this moment is the gift.

And so I think that personally, since I've been able to be very present in this moment is the gift. personally, since I've been able to create more balance by being, you know, calm and creating a new set point in my being. It has allowed me to observe and appreciate more. And we pick up a lot of subtleties when we're still and when we listen. And so this is where we learn. You learn so much by just being silent and observing. And there's healing in that, you know, when we talk about pause or listening or whatever, there's opportunity for things to land, for those bubbles to settle.

Yeah, I love it. It seems to me that these ideas of sitting with silence didn't come to me until later in life. But once they did, there's a whole lot of learning that happens. And I think maybe that's part of the journey. is that in the beginning, you're so full of thoughts and you're so full of, you know, maybe it's that you're empty. Maybe it's that you don't have any experience. And so you're desperately trying to get experienced by thinking out loud or trying this

or trying that. And then when you reach a certain threshold, all of a sudden you learn that the best thing to say is nothing. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. I think that, filling the space with words can be very empty. That's so true.

Right? It just doesn't need, it doesn't, we don't need to fill every moment with words. And the words we choose are a reflection of our own vibration as well. So choose wisely. Yeah, that is really important to think about. The words you use describe. who you are. And with that comes a lot of power, you have the ability to radiate beauty at every moment. You have the ability to give someone a compliment and see something in them that they may not

even see in themselves. And that comes back to you 100-fold when you begin seeing the world like that. And then we're back at the idea of reflection. Like, wow, I'm a pretty cool person. I saw this thing that they didn't notice yet. And then you see someone smile and you're like, I help them do that. You know, it's so awesome to think about. Yes. When my clients have these like, epiphanies and awakenings. I'm just like, yes, that is the joy. That is it. That nails it right there for me.

I'm like, okay, you know, it's something to be celebrated when we uncover our wisdom, you know, within that has been, you know, heavily weighted by our traumas and our outdated beliefs and, you know, ancestral programming and society's programming and whatnot. So, yeah, coming into our own truth is so liberating. And I think the true definition of freedom. It's conversations like this that really help me to further understand what's happening in society right now. When we talk about just this conversation alone helps to understand why people heal and maybe why they're sick. And then when we look at some aspects of today's medical model where it's almost like an addiction to addiction, people, they get addicted. And then the therapy for the addiction is more addiction. Oh, you're addicted to this?

Okay, well, do this other thing and just fill the addiction with this other addiction. And sometimes people get on the treadmill. I know that you have an experience or you have experience helping people with addiction. Do you think that there is a problem with the way most modern medicine deals, you know, most modern medicine, deals with addiction? Yes. I mean, we'll also put it right out there.

Yes. I mean, yes. Our model, the current model we are, is like a band-aid. We're not really getting to, you know,

and Gabor Matte talks about, you know, addiction being just a symptom of our traumas, right? We're all self-soothing. And, you know, in my, my studies also understanding

and learning that we all have addictions. It could be negative thoughts. It could be substances. It can be behaviors, shopping, gambling, sex, or, you know, like, it can be checking out. You know, we're addicted to checking out. Mine was my anxiety. I knew that that was my place to go to keep me safe.

That was my go-to. Even though it wasn't serving me, right? That's what I knew because I didn't know anything else. And so since I've been able to release that addiction, so much more of my life has opened up. And I'm able to see things and appreciate experiences that I wasn't, I wasn't read, I couldn't receive it. Just wasn't able to receive it. And so when we look at addiction as a symptom, you know, what's underneath it?

Where did the, what's, where did it start? What caused that trigger? what caused that. Sometimes these are taught, you know, these addictions. Oh, well, you know, my mom drank or whatever, you know, this is what she did. So this is what I'm going to do. And society puts us on, you know, it's so acceptable to go out and drink and, you know, have a cigarette or vape or gamble.

Like these are all readily available for us. Here you go. Yeah. Try this, you know. And it's not readily available to, here you go. Here's a retreat. center. You've experienced some trauma and, you know, go within and heal this wound and explore your ancestral lines. And, you know, that's not like the norm. It's becoming more and more available and

and more known, you know, but here's a safe place for you to unpack your traumas and realign yourself and release what is no longer serving you. You know, so this is what I provide is that safe place to kind of understand that, okay, event happened and we soothed ourselves and self-medicated or, you know, did whatever our ego was requiring of us to try to keep us safe at the time. And then before long now, we're doing it, even though what we're reacting to perhaps in the present day is, it's not the trauma that this was way back when, but we're still responding to it as though it is. Right. And so, which is no longer serving us, that behavior.

We've outgrown it. And there's that voice saying, okay, this isn't really what, you know, this isn't really good for me and I need to stop whatever this is, you know, and that's where the courage comes in. That's where the courage comes in to say, I'd serve better. I'd serve better. I deserve to live a life where I love myself, that I feel loved, that I'm worthy of love, and that I could share that level of love with others. And it's okay, and I'm safe. So feeling safe in our bodies and safe, you know, to be ourselves, our authentic selves, is an act of courage.

Yeah, I couldn't agree more. It seems to me too that we know when people get sick, they have symptoms. If you catch a cold, maybe you have a cough. If you catch a cold, maybe you've got a runny nose. And I'm curious to get your opinion. When we think about fear, is fear a symptom of the society we live in? Or is fear that which manifests the society we live in? Or both?

I think both. Yeah, right? I think it's all of it, you know. Fear is also a way of, you know, avoiding. Yeah. Right. It can be a need-jerk reaction. I knew it was for me, you know.

And facing the fear, you know, that's where the bravery, the courage comes in. There's no bravery and courage in just retreating all the time. You know, where is that? that's the comfort zone that we're stuck in. And even though it's comfortable, it's likely not serving our highest purposes. There's no growth there. The growth happens when we step into our, out of our comfort zone and into our growth edge. And one of the main questions that I ask my clients when we're doing this work is,

who are you? Who is, George, without these limited? beliefs. Who is George without said attachment to behavior, substance, whatever, right? Who is George without that? Let's discover it. Let's just get curious about it because you're the creator of who you are. You get to choose. And so if we're just getting curious, there's no, it doesn't have to be scary. We're just getting curious. We're just getting curious. curious about it. We can approach this from a gentle perspective. There's no forcing of anything. It's more of an unfolding and releasing, dropping away. And this work, you know, people tend to,

you know, it is. It's big work. And it's, and it can be scary. But when you're held well, you know, this is why vetting your facilitator, your integration specialist is so very important, is, you know, trusting who you feel safe with and that they're not going to lead you down a path of causing more harm, you know. But it's something that is unique to each of us. And we all have our own, like you said earlier, you know, like what causes one person this reaction doesn't cause another person. And so as we explore and discover what these are, we kind of say,

okay, is this actually true or is this just my reaction to it? And can I face that fear? And when we do and we overcome it, well, now we're off to the races. Now we can face another one and another one. And we practice that muscle, you know, we strengthen that muscle. And yeah, I mean, it becomes like there's a lot of momentum behind that,

I believe, you know. Yeah. And so when we, when we, truly accept that, that we are limitless beings, then, hey, sky's the limit. Yeah, I think so. On the topic of the space that seems to be unfolding in front of us, there's a, there seems to be a lot of people, and most of us have some sort of PTSD or a lot of us have traumas that we haven't dealt with yet. I think that's a better way to put it. And in doing so, it seems that there has been sort of an explosion in people wanting to help.

And there's a lot of new coaches coming and there's a lot of new programs coming out. Do you see that that is, to me, like on one hand, I'm like, wow, we need all these people to really help. But on the other hand, I think, wow, are some of these people the right people to help? You know, when I look at some schools that come up and I'm like, this person's getting a diploma where when I look at where you've trained at, you've trained at, you've trained it like, you know, all over the world and multiple different disciplines. And it seems to me that being an apprentice somewhere and having a lived experience is what gives you the ability to become someone that can help people. And then it does seem on some hand that there are, I don't want to say diploma mills, but I'll say diploma mills coming out that they're

offering people these certificates. Do you see, how do you hold those two thoughts? I think that there's something for everybody. And I think that these, modalities provide opportunities for healing of the self first. I mean, I learned so much through the courses that I've taken over the years, right, that has healed me. And that there's different approaches. I mean, we're coming into this like clinical approach and that's going to be a good model for somebody, you know?

Right. And we're coming into more of a, like, you know, I, I operate from more of a spiritual self-love, intrinsic knowing, nosis type of approach, you know, like a therapeutic coaching modality and where we get curious about yourself. And so, you know, in a more of a natural, you know, like nature-based set in a setting, you know, where we really connect on a different level. over a, you know, a period of time rather than a one stop, go in, do the thing, you know, lie in a clinical setting. That's not me. I wouldn't subscribe to that. I wouldn't feel personally comfortable in that environment where I was truly, truly helped, you know,

but that's my own personal thing. I think it could work for many people. And I think that, you know, we all have our own definition of what's safe. Right. Right. And so I think that there's something else. there for all of us, that we all come to this, approach this from a different perspective. And I think that one of the big components that I feel is really integral to this work is

having lived the experience, having a relationship with these medicines for oneself, taking the time to develop that relationship with that medicine over a period of time and sitting with it and learning about it, learning the ethics, you know, the best practices, having mentors, you know, having a community of other people that you're continually learning and expanding. This isn't just like, I do the thing now I've got the piece of paper, you know, I mean, this is, we're in this place of the psychedelic renaissance of where things are becoming legalized and decriminalized and decriminalized and all. all these different labels that we're going to put on stuff, right?

And yet the medicine has been here forever, right? And so, and, you know, some are newer, like, Favimeo doesn't have a huge long history behind it. But, you know, and yet it's within us. You know, so how we approach these medicines. And I think that because we're in this psychedelic renaissance, there's going to be like a big, I can just kind of feel that like there's going to be a lot of

attraction to do this and then some will fall away, right? And then the rest of us will continue on moving forward and being of service. And it's a journey. People will get out of it what they need to and then maybe it'll take them in another. There's so many modalities in here. I mean, you know, I belong to different communities where, you know, there's the people that are interested in the law, legal aspect, the ethics aspect, the, you know, clinical aspect, the, you know, the therapeutic that, like, and they can just

specialize in that, BIPOC, the, you know, underserved, you know, veterans, you know, like, there's just so many different aspects to be of service in the psychedelic renaissance. So really, I think that it's all going to, you know, mellow out and even out. we're kind of building the plane as we fly it in this experience. So there's a lot to be learned. And hopefully, you know, those of us that are in leadership positions are standing with high levels of integrity and discernment and being very, very devoted to, you know, the path of being in service to our highest potential. Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I like the idea of there being enough voices that they can call to everybody.

You know, much like we talked a little bit about the voice inside that calls to us, maybe all the different modalities are just a voice that are seeking someone that's seeking them. And if you look at it from that perspective, I think it can be helpful in a lot of ways to a lot of people. And everyone has their own method of learning. and you know for some people you can there's still the route of you know five grams in silent darkness or there's the route of going alone for some people and there's really there's really a lot of ways in which you can take it and it is exciting it's you know there's that quote that says the deeper in you go the bigger it gets and that just seems to be so true for so much of this

space it's a it's a beautiful aspect Melanie as we're coming up on on our hour I'll just want to tell you how thankful I am to talk to you. I love that we got to talk about relationships. And you're the only person I've ever spoken to who has told me that the first time they felt 5MEODMT was when they had this experience where someone close to them loved. I know people may have had that before, but the way you described it was beautiful. And it speaks volumes of your relationship with that medicine. I'm really thankful to get to hear that story. And I'm really thankful to get to spend time with you and learn from you. And I know that I'm inspired. by what we've talked about, and I think the audience will be too.

But before I let you go, where can people find you? What do you have coming up and what are you excited about? They can find me on my website at divinlightintegration.com. They can also find me on the five platform, the five educational platform. I'm featured as an integration specialist and a facilitator as well. There's a few other places I'm on, you know, you can just look more. me up on Facebook and send me a friend request either, you know, or follow my page on Divine Light Integration or on Instagram as well.

You know, I'm pretty easy. I'm here. I live in the Kootenies here and I run retreats out of my home and be of service there. And so really, you know, it's such a easy way to, you know, just Google my name and there I am, you know, pretty easy to do that. I'm working on creating a because I really believe in the importance of preparation. So I'm in the midst of curating a course for that, for my clients, so that, you know, they can come to these medicines feeling grounded in what they're doing.

They have purpose. They have intention. They're prepared. They're feeling really solid and held. And so that's something that's coming up for me. And yeah, I'm just excited. I'm going to be going to, I'll be at the Maps conference here soon. And so if anybody wants to connect with me there, I'd love to make me friends and see people.

So that's, you know, and I'm always learning and expanding my own, you know, learning about trauma programs and how to be of service in any way that I can. It's really beautiful. I think the name of your company and your website, Divine Light, describes you, perfectly. I'm so stoked to get to talk to you. Thank you for your time today. Thanks, great. It was a pleasure. Yeah, hang on one second. I'm going to hang up with the audience, but I want to talk to you for one quick second more. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for spending some time with us today. I hope you enjoyed the show as much as we did, and we will be back tomorrow to talk a little bit more with some other interesting people. That's all we got for

today. Aloha.