Trusty Hogs - Ep111. NATHAN FOAD/ Colleagues, Cucks & Cliff Richard

Episode Date: December 7, 2023

This week's guest is an accomplished writer, producer, actor and prank victim... it's star of Our Flag Means Death, Nathan Foad! Aside from being jump scared by last week's guest, Sam Campbell, we chat to Nathan about Dance Moms, fan art and how gift wrapping launched his acting career...FOLLOW NATHAN: @Nathan_FoadThank you so much for listening!Support us at https://www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)Thank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Mary Fox / Annie Tonner / Sarah Deakin / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Matthew Thomas / Madeline QuinnePRODUCERS: Richard Bicknell / Elle / Richard Bald / Neil Redmond / Victoria Hutchison / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Sadie Cashmore / Claire Owen-Jones / Jess & Nick / Zoë / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Graham Marsh / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Kie Web / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate Spencer / Tristin / Liz Fort / Taz / Anthony / Klo / Becky Fox / Emily Gee / Dean Michael / Glenys Wood / Stefanie Catracchia / Sophie Chivers / Marc / Carey Seuthe / Charley A / KCWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to episode 111 of Trusty Hoggs This is the episode where we talk about our perfect lives I'm comedian Catherine Bowhart, you are comedian Helen Bauer We've been to recording two episodes today and I feel Loco Crazy Bananas Hello Loco Crazy Bananas Through the fog

Step forth the Trusty Hogs Yeah You're gonna give them your problems And they will solve them Or maybe they won't And that's your problem They'll have guests And Andrew White on the tech

Oh, it's Helen and Catherine As the trusty hogs Trust the trusty hogs Or maybe not How are you, girls? I'm so good Yeah, how are you feeling? What's you up to? What's going on for you?

I'm so good. So much is going on for me, Catherine. Tell me everything. My mind's actually blanking right now. Oh, I genuinely... No, I have an observation. Oh, gosh, okay, go on. When people in films

are replaced with a stunt double It's obvious Okay I was watching a bit of Blades of Glory Have you seen it? No Ice skating film Wonderful stuff

Oh I have seen it with Barbie Margar Robbie Is she in it? No I'm thinking of the one based on Tanya Harding I Tanya I Tanya That is such a good

film. So what's Blades of Glory? Blades of Glory is the guy from Napoleon Dynamite and Will Therrell. A very different film and I haven't seen it. Okay.

And they are like... But are they not trying to make it look obvious because it's like funny? Maybe they are but it is insane because I remember the first time I noticed that someone

was swapped in in a TV show or a film. Which was? Malcolm in the middle Hal doing a rollerblading lesson. Oh my God. Yes. And I was like that is not him

and I felt so smart. I felt so behind the camera. That was part of that joke though. as well. It probably was, but as a child I was like, anything we did that? Genuinely? From my memory, it was like so obvious

that it was like obviously part of the joke. Blades of Glory, it's so obvious. But then you see the production quality in something like, what are the other ice skating films? Do you remember the ice princess? No. Okay, it was a Disney movie and it was a girl who was like,

I'm going to be a princess on the ice, an ice skating queen. And it was the girl from Buffy the Vampire Slare. The one that everyone hates. Neither of us watched Buffy, do we? No, we do. Do you mean Eliza what's her name? Who played Faith? I didn't watch it.

What? Okay, well, okay, what about Princess? I think I had character's name as Dawn. I'm Buffy. Dawn? Dawn, maybe I've got that wrong. Emma Black would know. Emma Black rang this morning.

Guess what she's got? Someone who lives really close to her runs a massage business from her house, like literally from her house. But like Emma would call her up and be like, Do you have an appointment? She's like, oh, sure, do you come over now? Just come in your pyjamas.

So Emma can wander down her street and get a massage in her pajamas. Oh my God. And I was like, are you fucking joking? She ran me. I was on FaceTime and like, Sunil was in the room. And Sunil was like, you fuck, that's an actual thing that exists. Could you imagine? I'd lose all my money to a massage masseuse.

My neighbours are mad. Last night, one of my neighbours told me that he would burn my recycling for me if he wanted. Like, I was doing that thing. So recycling was this morning. And because of the new wardrobe and the new bed and stuff, I've got so much cardboard. Of course. Because they're like, just furniture

that actually is quality and it's oak and it's not going to break. And I've bought for life. And that's what you get with oak. That's solid. So I was like, right, I'm getting it. It's proper furniture in. Got loads of cardboard.

Soneil obviously gets all his deliveries. He bought a blankie for the first time. Can you believe it? With the Highland Coup? The Highland Coup one. I told you about this, didn't I have the phone. Ridiculous. It's like, when you finally like break a man

to the point where it's like, they just realized they actually like these sweet comforts. I've never really gotten that far with one, but I understand what you're saying. He owns a blankie with Highland Cow's print on it. And it's well, and when I came in last night, super late was wearing it as a cape,

just wandering around with his little. Stop it. Has he heard of dressing gown? He's a dressing gown as well. He's so silly and little. I know I said dressing gown, because I call it a house coat, but yeah. You're trying to appease me.

I guess so. With the actual Irish dances. What's, sorry, speaking of... The recycling, I have to tell you all my neighbour said. Okay, great. And then I want to ask you a question. Okay, so I was like putting it all out at like one in the morning.

So I came back really late for my gig, right? Okay. And I'm putting it out on the street for the trackman. He was like, God, that's a lot of recycling. And I was like, oh, yeah, this is new furniture. And he went, oh, just shove it there because some neighbours are getting like work done. And there's like a pile of like shit in their front garden. I was like, oh, well, no, because it's got our dress all over it.

They'll figure it out very quickly. Yeah. And then he was like, if you want, I could, I could. And then he showed me his lighter and like started burning. And I was like, no, definitely don't do that. Definitely don't do that. No, thank you, sir. no thank you sir no thank you sir no thank you sir gave me an absolute creepsies but the good news is the recycling man took it this morning but because it was so much it was like i wonder if they actually will take it but then when i was making coffee i could see them arrive and i was like i don't want to watch but i do want to watch so i was like halfway behind a curtain like this just like looking at them and then i had more recycling in the house which would just have to be loose because the recycling bins totally full and i was going to run out and i thought you know what leave it helen wait for them to go and then you fill it up immediately and let your neighbours hate you that's my

my girl. And that's what I've done. That is my girl. Good for you. And I'm still recycling to do this day. Good for you. I've had so much rubbish in the house because there's like a limited number of black bins which I'm not used to. I'm used to like, you take the street. Yeah, but in this case obviously it's like a completely reasonable number of bins usually if someone isn't moving in and you aren't clearing out everything in the house. But in so far as the context is such that we are, I've had to keep bags of bags and bags and bags and bags of rubbish in my car and I just, every time the bins are empties. I just refill them and I think

everyone hates me. But that's fine. Is it not to the point where you might want to go to like a, what's it called? A skip. A tip? A tip. Yeah, but I can't figure out how to do that. I know. Me and Sanil did it once. Okay. Yeah, but not in your local area. No, you go on a website. You find your local tip. I tried that, obviously, but I couldn't. And you drive to it and you go, hello, we're here for our appointment. It's so

fun. We had the best time. But I couldn't, I couldn't figure it out. So maybe I'll try again. Okay, I'll try again. I'll show you how to do it. And then you drive up and they go, here's your electricals, here's your fabrics, here's your miscellaneous. And then you just go around and just chucking stuff. And it's so silly. And there's like so many guys at work there, no teeth amongst them.

It's incredible. Like I don't know where they find them. And then that's it. Then you just drive off with an empty car. That sounds very, actually very nice to be fair. And what I then want to do when it's all done after that whole move is, God, I'm so boring. I'm just telling you my admin,

but what I'm desperate to do is get the car valeted. So that it's just clean again and delicious. does it not smell like coconut anymore oh no it smells of the joe malone stuff I have in it now I have a joe malone car diffuser that my friend gave me when I got my car and she gets Georgie and georgie got me a bin for my car

I know I've got the bin it's fantastic so um the car it will be lovely again once it's fallout how boring what I want to ask you was what is the best worst Christmas movie that you would recommend to people who want to be in their highland coup blankets watching something

trash um personally for me there was a couple of years ago out on Netflix oh my god what's it called is it called like a New York Christmas Eve or something that sounds like a phone genuinely and it's it features the ghost of the

aborted baby of one of the lesbians who are the leads and the whole thing looks like it was shot on like a Nokia 10 this is not real a Nokia 33 10 a Nokia 33 10 remember the Nokia 33 10 remember the Nokia 33 10 well you should see the 10 oh fuck off you know what I mean

you know know what I mean, bitch. You know what I mean, though. That's insane. So the ghost of the aborted baby is a character. It's played by a character. You don't realize that's what he is. Or maybe spoiler. But it's honestly such a good watch.

It's like really funny. So I just have to find the group chat that I mean with Georgie and her mom because we put all of our bad Christmas movies in there. You have a group chat for bad Christmas movies? Yeah. I'd recommend going on ITVX. They've got like a massive film platform on I watched fried green tomatoes

the other day on it. That's a great film. It's a great film. Oh, I loved that film so much. Highly recommends, highly recommends fried green tomatoes. It is very sad though. So watch it at the right time. Also, random moments of comedy. It's got everything.

But if you go to the bottom, it is just like a Christmas village, a Christmas cabin, a Christmas lady in the woods who doesn't get killed but falls in love, a Christmas candle shop. And it's all just like stray sexual relationships

where they fall in love on Christmas. Eve and by Christmas Day they're married and sometimes Dolly Parton's there which I always see as a bonus. So I can't find the New York Christmas. If you are listening to this and you don't, if you've watched that film, please send it into us. I would genuinely be curious because part of me is worried this might have been a dream. I also, did you watch a castle for Christmas with Brooke Shield? Yes. Oh my God. I forgot about that one. Oh my God. That was like last year. Yeah, and his name's like...

Oh no, we're not watching you trying to remember people's names, babe. No, I've got it written down. His name... The castle is called Dun Dunbar, which means hail on a hill, which I remember. Georgie's mom was like,

for Foxxon doesn't even make any sense and it's like, correct. It's New York Christmas... I like Miracle on 34th Street, not the classic one. But like, the bad ones I also enjoy. Like, it'd be hard for me to identify it as bad,

apart from the Polar Express. I think the Christmas gay movie with Kristen Stewart the Happiest season is dog Wait what's the happiest season about? It's so bad So Christian Stewart is

Going home with her very posh New York-year-ish Or whatever girlfriend And her best friend Played by Dan Levy Is like, have a great time with your girlfriend

And the girlfriend's like sidebar They don't know I'm out Yeah And her dad like runs for local politics Or something Anyway, there's like a constant joke about how Christian Stewart's girlfriend and between her and her family about how Christian Stewart's like an orphan and they're like ha ha ha you're an orphan the whole time and also the girlfriend's trash and treats her terribly and then she meets the greatest woman alive Aubrey Plaza when she's there I love Aubrey Plaza they have clear and incredible chemistry and then we're supposed to be like excited that she's with this like weird waltz poo hates herself and then Dan leave her the whole time is like but you don't really know why. It is, honestly, like a perfect cast with a terribla plot. Okay.

Am I wrong? No, that's, that's fine on. Thank you so much. It is also called a New York Christmas wedding. It is called a New York Christmas wedding. It's please check it out. Baby, I'm going to watch this weekend. I do, I want to.

It's so fun to watch and be like, huh? The whole time you're like, huh? Wait, so the options are for me this Sunday evening is to watch a New York Christmas wedding by myself, or Olga Cox has sent me a message that she has an extra ticket to a gay panto called Sleeping Beauty Takes the Prick. That's... You have to do that.

I think I have to. Should I respond to say, yes please? You have to. Sleeping Beauty takes the prick. You have to go to that. Okay, I have to go to it. You must. But I also want to watch this Christmas film. You can watch it.

There's plenty of time to have Christmas. Actually, I'm decorating for Christmas on the first of December. So that is... It's a Friday. It's a Friday. So, and that would have happened by now. Oh, I'll be doing it on the 27th of November. And I just want...

I just like, I want to have like, the most wholesome Christmas day because last year we decorated for Christmas and it was wholesome but Sineal had a couple of his little boys over Eddie Hare and Nick Ellery not little 30 and 50 but they had McDonald's and I was decorating

and my tree broke but I refused to get rid of it and I've got it again this year because it's still broken but I don't give a shit and like I was trying to be wholesome but they were like eating Big Mac and like fighting over nuggets and things and like this year because it's like a whole new me now since I got the air fry this week of course

Yes, you've got an air fry, congratulations. Since I'm an air fryer owner. How much did it cost you on Black Friday? 69.99. That's pretty good on a funny number. And what have you made? Chicken nuggets. And my first thing I made in it to practice with,

I had like, you know potato waffles, but when they're in the shape of letters, alphabeti bites, alphabets, you know? Is it like smiley faces? Yeah, yeah, but in letters you can, like, spell things out. It is silly. Okay. So I had a bag of those, but I had some left.

So I put them straight in. And I was like, I cannot believe how fast this has cooked them. Really? How quick we talking? Oh, we're talking six minutes. But here's my question. With no preheating. Wow. Here's my question.

Yeah. What I have experienced from watching other people is the only person I know who has an air friar used to have this like big grease stain above it. Like where the grease gets, like the oil gets pulled out of it, doesn't it? Do you know what I'm saying? I mean, I've literally used it three times. I know. But just like, is that a common part of it and like watch out. for that and like, do you know what I'm talking about?

I don't know anyone who has the air fryer. I also think a grease stain would bother you a lot differently than it would bother me. A big grease stain? Yeah, we'll just wipe it off. Yeah, but like... Also, it's good because then you can see the grease that you're not eating. Also, here's the thing, this is what I'm doing. This is my favourite meal at the moment.

Helen puts a frame around the grease stand and it's like, health. This is what I didn't choose to put to my body this week. So what I'm eating, this is what I'm obsessed with. And you know when you go through a phase of a meal and you're like, this is all I want. Yeah. Because I got stuck on an algorithm of people.

Actually did have that yesterday morning and it wasn't absolute play. It was gorgeous. Not Christmas chucky porridge, just regular chucky porridge. And I was like, okay, I was watching like all these people like going and eating in Korean convenience stores. Like, there's an algorithm you can get on and it's just people eating in Korean convenience stores. And they get like this thing of ice and they pour the drink into it from a pouch. How do you ever read the book? convenience store woman. No. Oh, it's brilliant. You give to Helen. Yeah, it's really good. You had a book you still going to bring me today. You didn't bring her. Oh my God, yes. And I have a book for him as well. So both of you come to my library and then I'll write in my book that I lend them to you and I will remember and I expect them to come back in perfect condition. I'm gonna fuck. I'm joking. I'm not gonna do that. That's not funny. But so all I eat at the moment are Bodak noodles in the hot chicken flavour. They are so spicy. What is a bodack noodle? It's like the, it's a brand of like ramen noodles but they're walk style. So like they're really like, um, um,

like saucy. Do they come in a soup, like ramen? No, no, you cook them in like a pan so they like simmer down. Bodak noodles. They're insane. I get this hot chicken flavor and... Where'd you get it?

It's like any Asian supermarket. Okay, because there's an Asian supermarket around the corner from me. There's one around the corner from there everywhere. Can you get a vegetarian flavor? For sure you can get a kimchi-flavored one. Okay. So I put that in the pan and I cook it,

and then I fry an egg in a smaller pan. Okay. and they get it all sourced up and ready and then I put some cheese in it because that's what they do that's what they do it's like a Korean thing This says bulldoch.

Okay, maybe it's Bulldak Yes, that black packet I have The hot chicken one So why are you saying we And then I put some spring onions in it Okay Cheese in the noodles, go back a second So you put cheese in it

Some spring onions And then a fried egg on top And it is the warmest spiciest Cheesy Chewy goodness And if I'm really hungry I put in some other noodles like some plain noodles I have into the pan as well so I get more noodles but I just can't imagine it with the like a cooked with cheese but that's mental to me

because you haven't tried it so you're blacking yourself out blanking yourself out apologies you you have to give it a go because if you don't try it you'll never know and it's genuinely incredible but the only thing is it really burned fast eating it's so spicy and if it burns on the way it or burn on the way out. I'll tell you that for nothing. It tastes like, I can't remember what the flavour's cool, but chili. Spicy though. Well, don't get the hot chicken flavor.

Well, I wouldn't. I don't eat chicken. Yeah, we'll get like a milder version of it. It's so good. Okay. Also, it's really nice that it's like so quick in the pan. Yeah. Like, it takes no time at all.

And also, also, this is what I do with the air fryer. I put some chicken nuggets in the air fryer, and then I cut the chicken nuggets. it's up and it's like I've got grilled chicken not grilled battered but on top of it so it's like chicken and the meal health and that's a protein and that's a protein and then I also bought a packet of bok choy have I used it yet no but it's that my intentions are good I was about to be like where's the veg in all this my intentions are good but I have to stop eating it like Sineal's like it just smells all the time like this noodle powder and I'm like I'm addicted to it and I will not

stop eating it until I'm sick. And I haven't been yet. I mean, a lot of ant acids. But then I thought that was bad. But then one of the girls online who's eating it all the time, she takes her tums before she eats it, which is the American antacid. So now I do that.

Is it helping? Yeah, a little bit. Definitely digestional problems for about five hours afterwards. But it's so nice. You don't want to stereotype and be like Americans are less intelligent, but then like when you hear they have to name antacids. You're like, oh God, okay. I never thought about that, but that's so silly.

Maybe they're just sweeter. Maybe they're just sweeter guys. Tums. Oh, but I think we've got forehead, don't we? What's forehead? Forehead is like the English version of Tiger Barham and you just like rub it on your forehead. No.

But it's spelled like the numerical four head. The hay. Yeah. But you don't do that with Tiger Bam. You put Tiger Bam on sore muscles, don't you? I put Tiger Barham in my temples when I get a headache. Do you? Yeah.

That's very close to your eyes. Yeah. Oh, yeah, God. Yeah, it's awful. I don't think that's right. I put it on some times and like go. to sleep on the pillow and then I turn over and turn back but I've misjudged up on the turn back

yeah but your eye stops hurting eventually I don't think that's right yeah not I don't know you're not meant to put it in there no I don't know about any of that I don't know about it either do you bring on our guest I guess so maybe he'll know maybe he'll know maybe he'll know

tell you about my cyst so no thank you please welcome to the podcast Nathan Food oh I'm a spoiler if you have heart problems please be advised that this is a start episode. Catherine's on a pranking trail. Well, I think you all heard last week's prep for this, and I think you're about to get pranked if your name is Nathan Fode. Watch it on YouTube,

though, seriously. Hello, welcome to the plugging section. Do not skip. Do not skip it. On March 2nd next year, I will be doing my show one last time at the end. Earth in Hackney. Pretty cool. It's a massive venue. It's like 700 theatres. And when you go on the ticket linked by a ticket, which you must, you must, you must, please, it's going to be so much fun.

I'm going to be doing a split bill with Olga Cox. So she'll be doing an hour. I'll be doing an hour. We're going to design some cocktails. It's going to be the ultimate night out. Please join us. Tickets are available now. We are all coming to Leicester on the 10th of February. So you can see every single hog as a solo stand up. And you can also see Trustee Hogs Live, starting at 1230 with Helen's show.

then I'm on at 1.30, 2, 2, 2 o'clock at Duffeys. Then Catherine's at 3.30, so you can see us all back to back. Then there's a bit of a gap until Trustyog's live at 9.45. I'm also doing a work in progress at 8.30. But prioritise those first four, because that will be your big day out. 10th February, Lester Comedy Festival. Hydrate. Hydrate on my day. Hello, it's Catherine. Also, please don't skip this.

I know it's promo and it's boring, but here I am. I'm going on tour with a show called Again with Feelings. And my tour is going to be in London's Soho Theatre For two weeks in March And then I'm going to Brighton, Oldershot, Edinburgh, Glasgow, York, Newcastle, Norwich, Winchester Cambridge, Oxford, Bath, Birmingham, Manchester, Leeds, Liverpool, Sheffield, Exeter, Corsham, Bristol, Coventry, Guildford, Portsmouth, Swindon, Dublin and again in London In October, I'm doing a big date at Bluefrey Theatre

My point is, I'm trying my best, I'm coming to lots of places I'd love to see you there. I think the show's pretty damn good And shout out to all the Hampshire girlies, please go see Catherine in Pompey and in Oldershot, older shot, as we call it, and to support her. I want her to love Hampshire as much as I-D. And Winchester?

Winchester is in Hampshire, isn't it? I don't count. Why am I doing so many dates in, in Hampshire? Because it's a gorgeous county. Welcome, Nathan, folks. I know something. Oh my God, you know something.

Well, because my housemate has known Nathan since he was 15, and apparently... Oh, you're gonna love this. So... I'm in a blackout. I'm so panicked. So Nathan's an NYT kid. Helen's mother ran an illegal...

I was in MIT. No. State management. And yeah, of course. Wait, you did N.A. Because it's just like, yeah. That makes sense. Yeah, obviously I wasn't one of the actors.

That's... Translation, National Youth Theatre. Nobody actually cares. And Helen's mother used to run an illegal... The Alabama School of Drama? No. Wait, but... We have so much...

to discuss here. But how did you end up doing stage management instead of being an actor? I was rebelling from the Ambowr School of Drama. Yeah, of course. Because it's the thing, if you're raised by show busy parents, you go one of two ways. I'd say showbiz parent.

Okay, fine. I mean, and showbiz, as far as ran the Ambar School of Drama and slept with one of the teachers from Grange Hill, I made out with Daniel O'Lewis. Then yeah, she's the showbiz parent. Wait, okay, I love her. Oh, also slept with the man from the original Mr. Mussel advert.

Shout out to Ambauer. She's been busy. Wait. Okay, so she ran this drama school. The Anbauer School of Drama. Where was that? Our living room. In, where's that again?

Fleet, yes, I do know that about you. But then when I was 16, 2007, I went and, the actors, you got to audition, right? And it's like really hard to get in. Of course. And I heard that. It was like been told because there was a girl

in the year above me, she auditioned for it and it's like really hard to get in to be an actor. And I wasn't, like, at this point my confidence was shop because I wasn't allowed in the school play in year 11.

We've been over this many times on the podcast. Either way, I was slighted. I was too big to be in the chorus of women. Fuck you. Fuck you. Yeah, eat shit, Horner. Thank you.

She probably does. So. You get to. Stop it! That is... We would like. We would like to formally apologize. That is, that just took a year off my life.

That's one of the... I panicked. I knew when I panicked. I just felt like, that is one of the worst things that's ever happened to be, you little shit. Okay,

were you just on this fucking thing? Yeah. You didn't just come here for this. You little wanker. I know, come on. Let's say something kind to me, shall. Oh, he wins taskmaster. He thinks he can do whatever he won.

He brought his trophy for his time on the podcast. Congratulations, I'm winning. Stay on Mike. Let's stay on. Let's stay on mic. I'll get out of you. Congratulations, Sam.

Thank you, Sam. Sorry, there's a prank. I hated that. I don't like prank. I'm not a prank person. I like tweaked my back when I screamed. That was so horrid and scary, Sam. Can I say he masterminded it,

but may I say we did permit and encourage it and I'm sorry because you're our first jump scare, but I will say that we both knowing it was going to happen all those two. spent my copy everywhere. You jumped so hard. Can I say? I thought it was really good.

Did you, how long were you planning on saying? I could see from up there like looking down. That's so scary. Did you have like a timer? Like you just picked your moment. Did you not think I was rude? And you thought,

that's sort of it. I really did tweak my back when I screamed. You have to pay for his physio with his house mastermind. Why do you think I was keeping you outside? Catherine's getting changed. This is a toilet. Oh my.

Like, come on. I guess it. It's crazy that I didn't question that. You were fine with it. That's wild. It's always good to see you. Well, nice to see you, Sam. I love to show the other night as well.

Thank you. Thank you. Thanks, Sam. Thanks for you saying something nice about me. Sam Campbell from episode 110, everyone. Sometimes we do double records. The illusion's still there. We changed our outfit.

Wow, you were so good. You really. My heart is being so. I forgot. I forgot, I forgot eventually. Bye, Sam. Well, you go fuck yourself And you go for yourself

No, I was not I was actually not on board with it I feel like we're Ellen DeGeneres I feel like that was fucked up That was amazing And we treat our staff terribly Yeah Catherine was so game for it

Because this is her second prank in a month Wow I'm kind of a prankster now Oh wait I saw on the pocket I saw your prank Your OCD pranks So good So good

I'm like a pranking princess now And you actually Do you like pranks I hate them obviously I'm so scared. I hate the worst things in the world. That was really good. But my stomach hurts.

Like, I'm not comfortable after that. I can feel my skin so viscerally. But you know what? That was what we would call a harmless prank. Although I did physically. I burned my hands. Yeah, you really did. Look at that.

I can't wait to watch that back. Do you click this up and put it on TikTok? Because I can't wait for that clip to go. I think you just went, fuck you! I was so angry. Oh my God, I get so. I couldn't work out what was happening. I thought like you.

You know what I thought it was? I thought it was, you know, there's, like, fire alarms that go off that talk, you know, where they're, like, evacuate. I was like, it sounded so, like, microphoneed and scary. That's so funny. Are you okay? Do you diminish? No, I feel great. Okay, great. You walked out now, how amazing would that be? Wouldn't that be amazing if I just refused to, like, Adam Driver, you know, and he refuses to watch his acting when he does interviews?

I just walked out. Imagine, I should have done that. That's just to tell you what you should have done. Well, wow. You're willing to stay for the rest of the podcast? More than willing. Willing and ready. What a trooper.

What a trooper. So the national youth thing. I was like, if I go for stage management, I'll definitely get in, which means I can move out, right? So I did that. And I was there 2007, 2008, 2009, just in the summers. So you were there young? Mm-hmm. 16.

How old are you? Is that bad to us? 32. No. I guess, yeah. I'm 30. That just, like, 2007, I feel like I was like six in 2007, even though I was born in 1992. Does that make sense?

You were definitely 14. Okay. Yeah, for sure. Definitely 14. Would I have done it? 2009, maybe nine or something? Yeah. Did you enjoy it?

2009, I was working on Tori Boys at the Samo Theater. Oh my God, my friend was in that. Who? James Camp. Yes, that's so mad. I just said the name of the hottest man in the world to you. James Camp. I went to drama school with him.

East 15. Yes. Slay. Oh my God. Slay queen. Do you still talk to James? Yeah, we went to drama school together. Wait, you went to East 15.

That's the school. No, no, I didn't. He did like a foundation course of East 15. And then I went to a very, very terrible bad drama school. Slay. Also, the name, I don't give a shit. The Guildford School of Acting. The Guildford School of Acting.

Eat my hole, motherfucker. I went to Central School of Speech and Drama. Did you? It was bad for my brain. Me too. When did you go? Whatever time they were like, have you considered not eating

and that your face says victim? Do you know, have you considered that time? A dark, dark place. Maybe the whole thing, did you go to drama school? No, but would have thrived. Yeah, I think. Maybe the whole system has changed now, but God, it was bad. It was so dog shit.

The Guildford School of Acting. Yeah. I don't care. I hate them. Well, Guilford's awful. But what's fascinating is apparently Nathan can sing in French. Go on. Oh my God.

Yeah. No, I just... Frera Jacques. No, I learn, for some reason. And you know, those things that you learn, like, at a certain point, you're just like, oh, that is in my brain. Yeah, Japanese Alvulabin. Hey, hey, hey, you, why I'm eating. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

that. I can sing Summer Holiday by Cliff Richard in French. Do you want me to do it? Ready, it's a terrible time to do Cliff Richard, but off you go. Okay, okay. Is Cliff Richard the Alison Hammond clip that's going around now? Is that Cliff Richard?

I don't know. The fat-shaming guy? Oh, is he? Okay, well, I don't want to watch you know I don't condone fat-shaming, but I do condone me singing in French. He was fat-shaming Elvis, Alison Hammond was just there. Oh, he wasn't fat-shaming Alison Hammond because if that was the case, all the gays are going to be like, you know.

Has everyone seen the clip? Yeah. No. No, no, you actually have to say. Clif Richard is on this morning being like, oh, I actually once got the chance to meet my hero Elvis and they're like, whoa, cool. And then he was like, but he just put on loads of weight

so I didn't want the picture to be on my fridge to be of when he was fat. I got told this. And Alison Hammond was just out there being like, is that why you didn't want me to come to your house? And he was like, ha, ha, ha. But it's genuinely just like, what the fuck is wrong with you? The greatest recording artist of the time

was willing to deign to meet you and you were like, well, he's fat. Go, fuck yourself. And he was all of our fat hogs listening. if you see Cliff Richard fall on him. Yeah. And I mean fall. I mean like fucking go for it.

Like break the ribs. Then I saw a hilarious thing on Twitter where somebody had put up their update from their like Slimy's Award for the week from Sliming World and it was like... Their Slimy's award. Yeah, you get these like little certificates

or at least they'd made a certificate from Sliming World that was like qualifies to take a picture with Cliff Richard. Oh, that's really funny. It's good stuff, good stuff. We loved it. We liked it. But yeah, so just wanted to put that out there. So we're not condoning him.

we are condoning Nathan singing in French. Okay, I'll do it for you now. Okay. Now, I'm realizing, I've not done this in years, so I probably don't remember it. Okay, it goes like this. I do my valet chapar on vacancy tete.

Pada d'avois pendant six salmon. On pease, it's rapuze, s amuse, it's cladet. Pada d'avour for a un canzene. It's a few seven. Oh, God. Very good. I'd want to make sure to any French speakers,

I'm aware that, like, 60% of that was wrong. It was somebody who, like, happened in the last in years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eyes on the pride. As I was doing it, I should probably try and say, like, I hope I get jobs from that. You will. You definitely will.

I would love the job from that. Would you like to play a seven-year-old girl competing in a pageant? My dream come true, why? Do you have an opening? I just feel like that's what you auditioned for. Oh, my God. If you know there's auditions going around

for toddles and tiara's fair. film and you haven't told me I would fucking lose my mind. Who would you want to play? Patent mum. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Patent mum. I would be pageant mum. I'd be pageant judge if ever there was one. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I loved those shows. It's so funny the way I used to consume. Honey boo-boo. Honey-boo. Have you drank a go-go juice? Have you drank your go-go juice? And we were all just like, yeah, cool, that's normal. And it was like, fully a girl being abused on TV and we were all just like, yeah, for sure.

And I, and I would watch it be like, well, to be fair, she fucked it this week. And it's like, she's a Who was on that start? I was really into... Edenwood. Fuck, that is a name that's like rattled around in the back of mine. I mean, I haven't watched it for years. I loved it. I mean, on YouTube, I watch the compilation

sometimes in the background. Did they, like, stop making it? Because they were like, it's dark, it's too dark. Probably. They should, they should. I loved it. I also loved, like, very occasionally there would be like a boy presence in there. Do you know what I mean?

They'd like let one boy. In the tiny suits. It's like in dance moms, you know, how occasionally they'd let like one, like the little... Brady? Like, yeah, like one, like seven-year-old gay boy in. But can I say, I... Wait, wait, wait, Catherine, we never get to talk about dance.

No, but I want to talk about it to the entire world. I think my Kendall would be wonderful for the role of pros of parts. Discuss. Poor Nia on that show, the way she got told to it. Poor Nia. You know, Melissa's got her own YouTube channel now. Has she? No joke, she just went to Jill's house for an interview, and she's interviewed page. God, you really, you're a fondness.

Sorry, sorry, Melissa and Paige. Bit of a weird combo, apparently not. Isn't it so weird as well the way that, like, out of all... I suppose it makes sense that Maddie Ziegler is now just, like, real famous. And understandably so, she's gorgeous, I mean. I get it, I get it. And a randomly good actress. Yeah, West Side Story.

Why is it so random? Well, I guess it's just like, all she was doing on dance poems was like twirling. And she's actually, I watched this movie called... Did you know a grange on to say? It's called The Fall Out. Do you ever watch that movie? It's about school shooting. It's her and the girl who plays Wednesday in Wednesday.

Jenny Ortega. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were in a movie together about school shooting and it's so good. Wow, the Fallout. Maddie Zika can act her little butt off. Right, that downend. That makes sense. I guess they were all acting

like they wanted to be there and that's like, or they don't want to kill their mom. Oh my God. That's pretty impressive. Well, exactly. And yeah, they're all acting like they're not being actively abused.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Maddie Ziegler's like, gurney face and when she said like, gurn and I was sorry, I thought you were showing that to me. I thought that was like a light being like, stop talking about Madi Ziegler. No, when she's our boss.

The trauma that you can see in their eyes. And like, like, dark songs, I didn't watch it until I was older. so that one I immediately was like this is the worst environment in the fucking well and even though, sorry. Oh, I was just going to say there's a direct inversion I think between the boys in toddlers and tiara and dance moms

which is to say that I think that toddlers and tiara's boys were usually exceptionally talented and the dance moms are just like, that's just a boy in shorts. They found a boy willing to wear shorts on television and he's in the dance. I know and they would always try and oh God it was always so embarrassing they'd always try and spin the narrative for the boy

that it's like, here comes his stuff. that all the girls have a crush on. Like a little Billy Elliot running around. Yeah, exactly. I know who she'll be taking to prom and it's like, yeah, he'll make a corsard from scratch. But like, and he's there, like, who's thing near around.

And it's just, do you know what I mean? And it just, there's no dignity in that life. Sorry. Sorry, because girls can change properly in the changing room. Definitely, definitely the gayest little boy in town. Also, the like, full suits on the toddlers and tiara's boys was. Yeah. Heaven.

Yeah. Yeah, I know their little... Did they ever... There was never a... Was there ever a swimsuit element on Toddus and John? No, God. Oh God, that's one of those things where you were... I don't know if you hope you imagined it

or you hope you didn't imagine it. That's kind of tricky. It really was, wasn't there? It's not so crazy. And also, I do just want to say, yeah, I'm gonna get political for one single second. Isn't it so crazy all of the uproar around like drag queen story time

and the idea that queer people are groomers? And I'm like, why is no talking about that? Yeah, that's a strange. We were like getting like these little girls in their underwear and everyone was just like, yeah. Yeah. Like, it was so bizarre.

Too fucking right. I hope that goes viral. What I will say. I love how he said that after everything. I just, I really need a viral clip. I've not had one in years. I loved it when they would have their talent because it was like they would just dance, right? And like, terribly choreograph routines.

They couldn't remember it. But every now and again, it would be like, this kid could be a star. And usually it was just because their mum was doing it and they were copying it. But it was incredible when it worked. And this move, the one that you got. got full points for? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of, I like this one as well where they go,

and then they do that in a circle, I liked that a lot. Oh, my heart breaks. Because it was like, what was that genre? Like, you guys never do that when you're in the club? You get boys? I get all the boys that went. Yeah, yeah, it's so good.

It's so funny. And like, it was always, often with the Western flares, they were often like, like Southern. Oh, it's so good. Southern bells. Helen, when I was talking to Nathan at a party at the weekend

that I'd come and, on this, he did such a lovely impression of you. And it goes a little bit like this. Why are you here? Because Nathan shot a film or a show in the States for like five seconds. He's LA. And you're shocked that

he lives in this country somehow? This was the context of this. I ran into Helen in a bar. Were you doing stand-up? No memory. No memory. I ran into Helen in a bar. This is controversial. And Helen immediately greeted me by being like, why are you here? And I was like, and I was like,

And I was like, oh, it was so confusing to me. And we had a whole conversation and it didn't really unspool until kind of the very end of the conversation that you thought I lived in America now. Because you were asking me, you were like, do you, I remember you said, do you just go to Disney every day?

And I was like, Disneyland Paris. Like, it was so confusing. And then it was... I thought you went from working in the wrapping paper shop. Yeah, thank you. Okay, amazing time. It was a toy shop. It was like a children's, like, toy shop.

but I would wrap and I would wrap gifts on Instagram live when I was bored. Right, okay. And I'd watch all of them. Okay. I loved them. Such a little freak. It was incredible.

It was an incredible time. Thank you. Okay. And then Nathan went to L.A. And I just think he stayed. And here's the thing. Obviously, it's like very flattering. I love that that's the vibe that I give off.

L.A. vibe. That people think I live in L.A. But actually it started happening more and more now where people are like, oh my God, you're in London. I'm like, yeah, no, I live here. But I guess people just, of course, if you don't see someone very often, You just see what they post it on their Instagram.

Yeah, I guess I'm in LA loads. They're not like, I didn't call you because they don't like you. Well, like that too. I'd be less surprised if I saw you in the next episode of Selling Sunset than to see you in Soho. It would be my dream. Really? Who would you want to be your estate agent?

Oh, I don't know their names. I would just love to be on more television. Don't mind what it is as long as they're watching. I just want more credits. I like a Manza. Okay, is that one of the... Yeah. Her name's...

Manza. No, behave. Amanda. Yeah, she's best friends with Crischel. Oh, I love that. Crishell of Deep Lip fame. Amanda.

Yes. That just sounds like a camp man saying Amanda. Amanda. Amanda. I am Amanda. That's great. Wait, so you went to L.A. to film the Taika show. Mm-hmm.

And then you, which he found you for on Twitter? Mm. How did that happen? It's the craziest thing that's ever happened to me. I... Imagine if that was like the least... If that was like the third on the list.

I know. Can you imagine? And then Spielberg sent me on threads. And then, yeah, I guess. Greta was like, Greta and I were in the same same sprees. Who's going to be the first person to get discovered off threads? I really... I hope it's me.

Oh my God, bingies cross. Bingies cross. I, so I, as Helen, I used to do a lot of, like, internet comedy. Because I wasn't really going to actor. I was just a comedy writer. You were the rapping guy. I was the, and then I became a rapping guy. And by that, I do mean gift wrapping.

I never rapped on me. No, and you won't make that so clear. I worked in this toy shop for like three years and I started making like front facing coffee. It was sort of like while that, before everyone did that, before it was like a thing that literally every person on earth do. I made a few of them and they went viral, a couple of them went viral. And Tyca followed me on Twitter, which was like cool enough as it was.

And he like retweeted one of my videos on the day that he won his Oscar. So it was like, it just got a lot of like, buzz and I was like, oh this is cool but I didn't think anything would come of it and then like a year later I got asked to audition for the show and I was like well I'm not really an actor but I'll do like I'll audition for the show because it was just like

There are so many actors listening to this being like fuck you know I know it's so bad but you also he was MIT yeah and I did I was in the National Youth Theatre. Sorry so that is that is and I did go to drama school that is a thing and yeah I have an A in GCSCC drama A star even I forgot I had an A star Okay.

Congratulations. That's massive. Thank you for saying that. That's massive. So I auditioned for the show and my, weirdly, my best friend who I was living with at the time, she used to work for the agency

that I'm represented at. And she was, I mean, even she was like, babe, have fun with the tape, but you'll never get it because she was like, a lot of, like, big people are going up for it. So if any, those are the ones you get. If anything, it was quite freeing

because I was like, well, I'll just be a stupid little idiot then. And I got the part. And it's changed my life. she sign you? No, no, I was, no, can you imagine. I'm now representing my best friend. So I would like to represent me on. She was like, you've got something special. I knew you'd get it. I knew it. I knew it. And I always say. And that's when you moved to L.A. That's what I moved to L.A. Wait, so then you got the part and then you already had an agent? I was reped as a writer

and then they just like, I sort of got signed an acting agent at the agency kind of like took me on and I'm still with her to this day. So yeah. And it's, it's been a, it's been a, a crazy few years. It's been a very mad few years to be... Living an old neney. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you have the same boyfriend since the beginning, which is so romantic. You're gay? Sorry.

I've been rubbing your leg in at the table the whole time. When? Fine. Why? Oh, I know. Well, since Sam jumped scared me. That shocked me into homosexuality. I thought we were vibing. Yeah, yeah. Well, we are. Yeah. No, imagine. We just kissed. I did.

Yeah. She lent in. I, um, yeah, so I, I've been with my boyfriend for a long time. I love him so much. You know him? I love him so much. But that's because we're always the only two Irish people at, like, very English parties. You have an Irish boyfriend? Yeah.

He's great. He's northern Irish. I just want to make it clear. He's kind of like, I always say he's Irish when it suits him. So when he's talking to, like, cool Irish people, he's always like, yeah, these fucking English, blah, and I'm like, you shit, I'm the fuck. You come on, you're still part of the UK. Yeah, yeah.

But, no, he is. I like him. I like him. He's heaven on her. He adores you. Oh, that's so nice. It's so nice that you think he's heaven on her. I'm really love him a lot.

And I'm so smug about it, but I just love him. No, but that's the way you should be. How did you meet? At the Edinburgh Fridge Festival. Oh my God. Everybody meets at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. I met at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and it was really lovely and romantic. Were you in a play?

I was in a very bad play that I... I shouldn't say that because I wrote it with a friend who I'm still ready to go ahead of a play once. Yeah. I took it at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. What was it called? On the Line Media. I don't want to talk about it.

It was so bad. It was so bad. Oh my God. Wait, it was called online media. On the line. On the line. I think that's what it, I think it must be called that.

Say what it was about. This was 2011 or 2012-13. Okay. A news panel show parody. Okay. All right. I've got the measure of this already. Yeah, yeah.

About misinformation in the media. Whoa. And it was packed with laughs. Did it go down well? It was on. under Ella Taska in Newtown. Did it go down well? At two, well, were the people who saw it, enjoyed.

What was your play called? So it's so, it's so funny because it basically, a girl that I went to drama school with approached me and was like, do you want to write a play with me because she knew I liked writing. And it, but she already had a theatre company. So it was very much in the style of that company. Okay, this is way better organised than mine.

It was very legit. We did a run through of it in the cafe I was working in. Yeah, visual. Like, what was it called? It was called, this was the world and I was king. Oh, come on. But it was, it was based on, it was, oh God, it was, it's so funny that I wrote this now because it was so earnest. It was like a World War I family drama with like, from the German perspective.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a sympathetic, no, imagine. Oh no, yeah, yeah, imagine. Oh my God, you're German. It's World War I. It's true to me a lie. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I, uh, we wrote this play. It was like about, it was basically just a massive rip-off of the railway children. I love the railway children. My mother loves the railway children. My mother watches it every single Christmas.

She loves it. It's a beautiful movie. Bobby, Bobby, Bobby! I know, Daddy, my daddy. Oh, God, it's so good. And also really makes you think about how serious it flue is. Yeah, because we don't think about that enough. People just think, oh, it's just a bad cold,

but their mummy gets very sick with influenza. So true. And when she stops the train. Are you welling up? Are you welling up? Will she, like, stands in front of the, I can't do the rest of the podcast. But yeah, so I did the rest of the podcast. I did that play and I was in it and I met my boyfriend in a bar like on the second night of the fringe so I was like very I was very thin and wired and insane and I wore dungarees I wore a big pair of adult dungarees and I just I thought I was such hot shit which is so funny now because I've seen photos of myself from up here and I look absolutely repulsive and we met and we kissed and then he on the first night yeah hoaring yeah a little slut

Or a mouth slap. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Did you fuck the first night? No. Okay, sick. I get so scared talking about my sex life because the fans of our flag meet's death are so horny.

Really? Yeah, I love you guys, but like, yeah. Yeah, wow. But yes, I... Do they write fan fiction between you? I believe they do. I've never read any of it. They get very excited at the idea

that maybe we read it. And I think maybe some other cast members do, but I certainly do not. I mean, I'm really sort of... I'm bigging myself on I'm necessarily here. I'm really not the object of desire for that fandom. You are for me. Thank you for saying that. You're welcome. I am. There are other cast members that they're like absolutely like frothing at the mouthful but

for me it's just occasionally I'll get sent a sort of naked picture like a drawn naked picture myself where I have like tits or something. Um, which is lovely I think too. Well I know and I know you're good at that. Yeah. If you could show me the picture, just from the top half up. It's actually devastating that there probably is in a few of years measure. But yeah, I don't always. It's not that I don't love it. Like, free will, everyone can do what they want. I just, sometimes it's uncomfortable. When you, when you get tagged in it, I don't mind people doing what they want to do. Like, let you free, frag fire, but I, sometimes you get given

it to, like, sign. And, like, someone, like, shoves it in front of you, and you're like, oh my God, okay. Like, and I have said no to sign them before. Someone tried to get you to sign a picture that they've drawn of you naked. Yeah, okay. We can see. say thank you fans, like thank you for supporting that, that is a fucking line for us. Yeah, yeah, it's very, and they mean so well. Unless your dick's on the ground, am I right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, really good stuff. No, but seriously, even then. Yeah. Even then. I don't know, if I looked banging, I might sign it. Yeah, well, this is the thing, and what's crazy is, I've never talked about this, I'm so glad to talk about this, I'm still crying. I, the way, the varying ways in which people draw your body

is like crazy. Yeah. Because there's basically, like, there's three ways that they draw me, which is one, like, a sort of medium-sized man, which is what I am. Or they draw me, like, three times the size, and I'm like, okay, which is fine and beautiful. Or they... But excuse you, like, if I have dysmorphia around my body anyway, but that would, like, completely confuse me about what's true and real.

Yes, I think sometimes I'm like, oh, right, okay, I guess that must be what I look like. And then the other one, which is maybe the most incidentious, I think, is when you get drawn and they draw you, I think, what... they draw you as what they think gay men should look like. So they'll draw me as like a twink. And I'm like, oh, I don't look anything like that. They'll draw me as like a stick insect with like cheekbones and like, and that's always very confusing because I'm like,

well, I definitely don't look like that. But they're just like, well, that's what gay characters often look like in things, you know. Oh, that's what you should look like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're the stick insect in bugs life. Yes, I look like that, but like fit, you know. Yeah, so it's very confusing. All of this is to say, love you all so much.

so much for watching the show. We mainly get pictures of our face, but I always look like I've got ex-mart. Do you get drawn as well? Look at behind you. We get cross-stitched, we get crocheted, we get drawn. Oh, this is great. Okay, that's actually great.

We've got gaps between all our teeth. Did a fan do this? Yeah, that is amazing. Check these ones. Oh, I get a lot of cross-stitched as well, and I really like them. Yeah, the cross-stitches are great. Look, we're on a place down here.

Oh, my God. Over here we're, yeah. I will remain on pod professionalism. My hair is always red or which I love. Yeah. And then, well, oh it's gone. But yeah. Oh my god, yeah, yeah, no, I can see it.

That's so nice. People really, um, people are so talented. We get made into pigs. This is me. And of course it is. This is the thing as well, you know, when you're being drawn? I'm bigger. Sure.

That feels, yeah, yeah, that feels cruel. But I, um, I, it is so funny, isn't it? It's like, in all of the drawings, it's like, the drawings, it's like, you have to just pick, they have to just pick one defining feature of you. So obviously you, it's big boobs, you, it's red hair. And then they just take that and like, really run with it. Wait, I think I've got boobs on the pig, do I worry?

Feeling. Wouldn't it be so good if you're, a big set of heavy natural? Like, oh, I was going to crochet a pig, but they've already got loads, I'm not going to do it. If you send it a pig with, actually that goes back on what you said, I'm not going to sign it. I would love a pig with a pair of cats. Everyone has their own line.

Like, I think a pair, a pig with a pair of tics is very fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just don't need to see... She had a mass of pair of knockers, no. Or is that like a, um, Mandala effect? No, no, she did have a bit. She had full tips. She definitely did.

We've all right to rub to that. Nathan. Sorry. What kind of advice giver are you? And do you get asked for advice a lot? I do. Yeah, I think I'm a pretty, I think, it's so funny. I'm somehow one of the saner ones in my friendship group, which I think is I think I'm mad.

Who do friends with? But I think you're also, I think you're also a gay man in a long-term relationship, and those both leads to advice being. ask, like, if you're in a long-term relationship, people are going to come to you with relationship advice, and if you are a gay man, women are going to come to you for advice. Yes, exactly. I'm always very happy to give relationship advice. What I'm not very good at giving is like dating advice. That's what I was saying. I haven't dated since I was like 20. So when...

Don't look at me right now. I'm sorry. No, no, no, don't be sorry. Don't be sorry. I swallow the mind. Look at Catherine. Jay, but why? Do you have advice that you need? Oh, no, no, I just mean like I get asked more like, um, I guess I feel more comfortable giving relationship advice, um, because I'm a serial monologna. There is no advice you can give because the world's going to burn. and there's no point meeting someone to watch them die in a fiery pit.

Why would I start dating someone to watch them? You were taken away from me by a tidal way. I do, you know what? I don't think you for saying that. I do think this all the time. Do you? I do think, well, I think as in, like,

I've said it to my boyfriend before where I'm like, like, when we're just like loving each other and having a sweet moment, I'm like, this is so fucking stupid that we love each other this much because if anything bad happens to you, I will kill myself. So I'm just like, but I can't,

I've done this to myself. You sound super chill. Well, because I'm like, well, what am I going to do without you? They die, you get a bench, and then what's next? Like, it's so much. I'm going to have to fuck the bench. You fuck the bench. Fuck that.

Yeah, instead of it being slashed, just loads of holes. That's my game show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, perfect. Can you imagine? That's so scary. What's scary image. Someone's going to draw that now. You sit on a bench, slow and holes.

Oh, but at least won't you look lovely and thin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would be true from the grief. No, I know, I do. I do think that is like for me a marker, of love is like, is that you're like, oh God, now all I think about is you dying. Yeah, it's really, really horrible.

Also, the context here is that I, do you say, I can't remember, do you say your girlfriend's name on this podcast? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Too often, I'm like, oh, yeah. Ellen, Catherine's girlfriend, Ellen is a very good pal of mine, and I love her dearly. She's so good, hi, Ellen, I love you. Hi, Ellen, I love you too. She will not listen.

Okay, perfect. She refuses to listen, but she, um... Because she knows you talk about your relationship, or... Yeah, and because I think... Also, she's a liar. Ellen's a liar. She told me yesterday, that there was a poem about Oldershot Station She got it wrong

Older shot station It was a station called what? Oldham or something Yeah But the other thing she missed She missed it was very late when you call And then she said she's gonna buy me a baby bell But I bet she's already forgotten

I already ordered them on the Saints For your trip over Because I knew that the two of you Would have this thing Thank you But also can I say that I'm getting a baby bell These guys are friends

And oh I think also she doesn't listen Because when I'm not here It's like her one break And she really deserves it And she really deserves it Yeah, yeah, yeah, I try to double them up So she doesn't have too much time without me But she and you have a friendship group

That are called the colleagues, right? With a colleagues, yeah. Because they're self-employed, so they meet up for a Christmas colleague's dinner Which I think is so nice, like a staff night out We really try and how do look at the AGM Because it's really hard You guys know when you're freelancers

It's that you don't really have Maybe it's different for like comedians Because you gather a lot more at gigs I'm in a group called cucks Who are the cucks? The cucks are me, Heidi Rieke Neil O'Rourke, Nathan Darcy Roberts, Sunil Patel, Nick Ellery. We went to the cinema

the other day. Some great people. We saw a dream scenario. How was it? Incredible. Okay. I just wrote on a show that Sunil Patel is in. Stop, what show? Lucia Keskin's new show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was amazing. I mean, I did the audition with him. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's so good. So, yeah, I... What was I saying?

I'm gonna blackout. You have the colleagues dinner because you often spend time alone because you're riders. And I, we were a little gang. and we hang out as much as we can. Because it's just like... It's so cute. Because writers are so, like, comedians are so much more of a social job,

I think, unless maybe you're on like tour or whatever, but which you're about to go on. I'm like, was a hypothetical, like, or whatever. Yeah, yeah, I'm on tour. Are you on tour right now? How are you finding it? Lonely now, you said that. But is it, though?

No, I've never done it. I find it really lonely. Yeah, yeah. It depends on like, like, next week we'll get lonely for a minute because I'm away for, like, three nights in a row. And, like, my tour support is, like, living. But, like, yeah, I pay people with my friends on tour. Also, I'm fine with a lot of time alone, which no one believes.

Yeah, me too. I really, I really, really love to be with people. Wow. Yeah. Do you like being alone? Yeah. She loves it. I crave a day by myself.

All I ever sort of think is, like, when I'm, like, really, really busy and over-simulated, I'm like, God, I would just love, like, an evening in alone. And then I get 45 minutes into it, and I want to rip my hair out. Like, I'm so bored. And I took that I call. Yeah, genuinely. I guess I could listen to a part. while I ring my mom.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. No, you have a glass of wine and you read your book or you put on a film and you disassociate and I have such good company. Oh, see, this is a thing, I hate my company. We laugh and we laugh and we laugh. Just cackling into a mirror. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sounds relaxing. We pierce things.

Is that still a whole? But so to circle back, are you a good advice giver or no? I think I am. I think I'm a pretty good advice. I think I'm good, except for dating. Like when people are like in the early stages of dating I'm like I don't know Like I'm asking him to marry you

Like I just because I'm such Tell him you think about when he dies And hey I have to fuck a bend Yeah yeah What I will say is just before we get into this Often to say no I know we have a good We have a last

We have a jump scare But sometimes our problems come from young queers Which means that they are also earnest You know you'll remember from your play Yeah And so just totally I'm gonna be so nice I promise I'm a really nice guy

Yeah unless they fucking drew you In which case Not so much Go. Ready. Okay. This is a bit of workplace advice, please.

Oh, from the colleagues. From the three people who are not, they've never worked a real job. I was a receptionist. Yeah, please. Hey, Hoggs, E here. Hi, E. E for context is female 28,

and I need some workplace advice. There we go. Emma, if this is you writing in, I swear to fuck a lot. You're having a nice time. You like your life. You're staying. Basically, I work in a very male-dominated workplace.

It's not M. Yay for me. Okay, she works in a male-dominated workspace. Yay for me. Rock climbing. This year, I've had some lovely bullying since becoming a manager. Brackett's the only female manager. I basically put it down to all the men of Brackett's boys being white,

cis, very middle class, and not realizing that they're being sexist by openly undermining my work every day and not doing it to any other manager. I'm praised by my SMT all the time for my work. The amount I do... I'm just trying to work that on myself. Senior management? Team. Teener management team, I would have said.

I panicked. Really struggling with the corporate jargon. How well do... They praise me, think I'm very responsible, give me lots of work to do, and I often work 10 plus extra hours a week. I do get paid over time though, so don't worry. That's good.

However, this year I've lost 50% of my team due to redundancy, which meant my workload has doubled. And I recently went to my manager in HR saying I'm not coping with the extra workload, as well as various other issues, including bullying. And I was given a week off for mental health, but came back to even more work on my plate and no hope of management, seeing my side of things or lowering my workload. So I have applied for another job because fuck this.

shit, but it's very scary and I need some reassurance and some advice about leaving a very good career path and taking new steps. What advice do you have? What reassurance can you offer? Thank you very much. It's not a good career path because you're miserable and then expecting too much from you. Is that like that at that level? Just get worse. Start again. Open a bookshop. In a well. Full stop. In a well. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Interesting. That's so bad. So you're, in fact, you do so much work. You've lost 50% of your team

and the team that you do have are really mean and they're bullying you. Oh, you tell them, you take a leaf out of my sister's book and you tell them they can all go fuck themselves and good luck getting to Mitchell and Star without you and walk out. Yeah, I do. What a specific.

Oh yeah, no, she... I like getting the mission and star without me. This is amazing. I like the idea of this person saying that exactly. Um, Nathan. Oh God, that's hard, isn't it? That's so horrible. I'm so sorry you're going through that.

I... That sounded... I meant it. I'm just gay. I know I was going to say. It's not the gay thing. It's so hard when you're gay. I say, sorry, I'm getting through that. Yeah, no, that sucks. I think, I mean, the only advice I can give is for like,

if you do leave the job, which you should, because it says horrible. Right. You should, I always, my one thing, whenever people ask for advice about, like, getting, like, jobs and CVs and stuff, I'm always just like, lie. Just lie on the TV. I think people are so caught up in honesty,

references and blah, blah. Just lie. Like, if you find his name down, they'll call them. that member, yeah. Exactly. Like, for example, if your boss is a dick at this place, which it sounds like they are, and you feel like you're not going to get a good reference from them. Put me down, honey, I'll lie for you. I'm just, like, I just think. Nathan Fode Industries. Yeah, do it. They're not going to know who I am. And I'll,

I'll write your reference. I just think, I, it's so hard, I think, I have about four friends with real jobs. And it's so, it's so, and people get, like, really stuck in these cycles and these patterns, like, miserable, in horrible, horrible jobs. And it's so hard to, like, remove yourself from it, but you do just have to Don't find yourself halfway up a ladder you don't want to climb. Better to be at the bottom of a ladder you do you want to. Try it again. Don't find yourself

halfway up a ladder you don't want to climb. Find yourself at the bottom of one you do. Keep facing the sun and the shadows will always fall behind you. Wait, I'm crying, that's amazing. What's your advice to this person? But through a phrase. I would have said that Had you not explored every option to both inform your SMT

and to exhaust the means that are available to you to make the situation better, then I'd be like, hold your horses and why don't we try talking to people. You've got horses, work in that. But given that you've advocated for yourself. Stop! That was the best joke I've ever made. This is your entire life, isn't it?

Just really earnestly. Hold your horses. If you've got horses, what can that? That's just, stop. That is a good joke. That is a really good joke. It's not like, stop the podcast,

let me forget what I'm saying. Is that quite, isn't that quite joke? Is it like Catherine doesn't belong here good? Oh, no, try it again. I'll say run a stable. Don't fuck yourself. That would be good, yeah, yeah.

And then I would say, hold your horses. Well, run a stable to me. You've got a horse. So this is a stable. It's kind of there. You'll figure that out. How many horses could you?

Have you never heard this phrase before? Nightmare for a while. Nightmare. But it is a good joke. It's, I guess it's logically consistent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good stuff. Yeah, it's good.

It's all usable for this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, hey, hey, why not? Hey, yeah. Okay, fine, thank you. So here's the thing. Given you have advocated for yourself, I think it's absolutely fine to now start applying for jobs and to expect work to not be making you ill. Yes. Work shouldn't be making you feel ill.

I think it's, I think it largely shouldn't, you know? I really think it's a large, especially if you don't run the fucking company. Yeah, exactly. That's the thing. It's like, it's so hard, isn't it? Like, I so don't know that corporate world, so it's hard to, like, have you ever had, like, a proper job job before comedy? Yeah. What did you do? Marketing. Oh, right. And how, are you still going?

we're having the most earnest conversation. Helen wants to, if she was breathing, she'd have jumped in to say, marketing, why don't you just want to market? And honestly, it would have been a great joke. Did you ever, in your marketing time, did you ever work with anyone that you deemed to be like a bully? Yes.

Really? But I would also stress that I was there while I was starting stand-up at night time. And I gave, ooh, what's less than 0% to that job? Honestly, every single week I'd have a meeting with the poor girl who had to manage me and she'd basically be like so I was thinking this week maybe you could do that stuff

you said you'd do last week and I'd be like how do I do it again? Yeah She'd be like okay so I'll just take up with another meeting with IT and I'd be like

oh tired so I'm worked with a bully was the bully who's to say I think I ruined her life oh my god

you were the bully I actually love that well by being a petulant little tired comic who was just like can you just paint me and can I just do nothing? I know, I don't think I ever,

I mean, we've got to start off topic here, but I don't think I've ever taken any normal job seriously. I did. Which, what were you? I took every job so seriously. I, my friend Francis, like, literally one of my best friends now.

But we met and I was doing a trial shift at the cafe they were working in. And I was like, fucking 20 or something. And I was doing the trial shift and they were like, oh, someone needs to take out the bins before we close. And I was like, I'll do it! I'll do it!

I'll do it! Really? Oh my God. I truly... I would always, like, do the entire... I left so much energy. Like, I took it seriously. I remember, this is so weird.

But, like, I was like, I wanted to do stand-up. I hadn't started or anything. But I wanted to do something in comedy. Like, write a sitcom. And my friend bought me Amy Polar's biography. Oh, that book changed my life. Sorry, I know that's so basic, but...

No, no, no. Sometimes there's, like, a sentence and it just really sticks with you. And you might not even remember this bit. There's a bit called being a good waitress. And I was a waitress, but it's like, you will always be able to... to work if you're a good waitress. So why would you not be good at the job?

Because then you're like, and it's like, okay, that makes sense because I was already like doing it because I was like, I need to un-money and seriously enough, right? That's good. And I was like, okay, if I'm good at this and I always have a job. So like, I was so, like, it was lame. I, I truly, I've never. But I gave out a lot of free coffee stuff.

Worked hard at any of the jobs I've had that I weren't in like comedy or TV. I remember, this memory's just come back to me. The second, like, call centre job I ever had was in Sutton. where hope goes to die. I know, Saturn. One of the darkest places on earth. And I would get on the train there every single morning and feel like I could like

taste like blood in my mouth. I was just so depressed. Oh, that's an awesome. It was awful. And then I, that's something else. Yeah. And then I remember on my very first day there, like I did two hours.

And I obviously just like wasn't taking the job seriously. I was like, this is so stupid. We were calling up doctors to try and get them to do medical surveys. And a guy, like a very like nervous manager. And it was clearly like his first week as a manager. like pulled me into a meeting room and he was there with like a woman next him

who was clearly his superior who like the entire time at the attitude was very much like, come on. And he was like, I'm not joking when I say he was like on the edge of tears, his voice was shaking. He was like, because he obviously was so scared of conflict and didn't want to discipline me. And he was like, I guess we just want to know

why you've spent the first few hours of the date just talking so much. And I was like, oh, have I? He was like, and then he had all over my. like call records and he held them up and he was like visibly shaking I was he was like terrified of me and like conflict and I was like oh I guess I didn't realize I had been talking he was like we've had noise complaints from the other pods and I was like oh on the other light part and I was like oh god I'm so that's where that moved from on

the top of the tiara we've had noise complaints from the other pod and I was like I'm sorry I guess and I worked there for like four more days and I was like this is so fucking later I was like, it's my first day, you nerd. But I, it's because I was just talking. I didn't do any word. That poor man. I know. Where is he now?

Sutton, probably. Yeah, genuinely. Still kicking around Sutton, so sad. No one kicks around Saturn. Sorry, I don't know that's, I think his, genuinely, I think his arc will be that now when he goes to discipline people. He, like, kicks the door. Oh my God, yeah. He's like a really, really abusive boss.

I'm going to end your life and I'll tell you. He's the boss. He's the boss this person's writing in about. I think so, probably. Full circle. Okay, so sorry about your bad boss and I hope you, it's better. I think, we all think quit, you deserve better.

Oh, you really do, but what the fuck do we know? That horse thing was good, wasn't it? That horse thing was good. Really good stuff. The horse was, I love when, I love watching that. I love when people laugh at their own shows. It's so good. Because I, I can spend it all that time by myself.

Yeah, that's true. And I'll be at home and I'll think of that. And I'll just be on the floor. Pissing myself and Neil will come back with a mop. like all confused. I'm doing a script at the moment. I'll write it in.

It's a really good job. Pop it in. Hold it in there. Don't steal my line though. You can only have the punch line and you can have the set up. That's fine. You trademark it.

So all I can say is well work and a stable. Yep. Yeah, I think you can make it work. There's a right around for that. Calfway, please. No, sorry, you have to pay me. You're a fucking bitch.

Sorry. I'm upset. Everyone else's all the other parts. Nathan, where can people find you? Oh, you can find me on social media at Nathan underscore Fode. You can, the second season of Our Flagmeans Death just came out on HBO, Max. The first season is on BBC Eye Player. So I watched it.

Watch my show at Newark. It's on Now TV. And I'm Nathan. And I'm Nathan. Yes, Nathan. Also, if you're on Now TV, you can watch all three Lord of the Rings films. I recommend you do. And I'm in all of those as well. No.

No, no. No, yeah. God, they were so young. I do you think I look like Arwen, though? Yeah, for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's Arwen? Liv Tyler.

Live Tyler. We've got a step, mask, I'm time. Okay, thank you very much. Bye, Nathan. Bye, Nathan. Thank you so much to our executive producers, Guy Goodman, Simon Mores, Mary Fox, Ali Tonner, Sarah Deakin, Oliver Jago,

Anthony Conway, Matthew Thomas and Madeline Quinn. And thank you also to our producers, Richard Bicknell L. Richard Boulds, Neil Redmond, Victoria Hutchison, Harold Van Dyke, Tim and Dom, David Walker, Rachel Larson, R. Sady Cashmore,

Claire Owen Jones. Jess and Nick, Zoe, Sarah and Molly Riafink. Cordelia, Rachel Page, Helen A, Tina Lindsay Graham, Marsh, Amy O'Rewden, Abby Worf, Key Webb, Math Sims, Luke, Wright, Leah, Kate Spencer, Tristan, Liz, Tass, Clow, Becky Fock, Emily G, Dean Michael,

Glenys Wood, Stephanie Catratchia, Sophie Chivers, Mark, Anthony, Why won't you separate them? I can't believe you did it two weeks in a ride. Sorry, keep going, keep going, keep going, I believe in you. Sorry to the producers. Carrie Sooth, Charlie, A.K. C. Haley, Wharf. Thank you all so much.