Trusty Hogs - Ep150. THE BIG PIG QUIZ

Episode Date: September 5, 2024

To celebrate our landmark 150th episode, we pitted Catherine and Helen against each other in the ULTIMATE Trusty Hogs quiz hosted by a velvet clad Andrew! Thank you for all your love and support over the last three years, who ever thought from an industrial estate in Hackney all those weeks ago that we would now be here for our sesquicentennial...PLAY ALONG QUESTION / ANSWER SHEETTOUR TICKETS: www.trustyhogs.com/tourThank you so much for listening!Support us at www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)All links: https://audioalways.lnk.to/trustyhogsSNThank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Annie Tonner / Stefanie Catracchia / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Neil Redmond / Madeline Quinne / Grace O'Reilly / LilyPRODUCERS: Elle / Richard Bald / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Sadie Cashmore / Claire Owen-Jones / Jess & Nick / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Graham Marsh / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate Spencer / Tristin / Liz Fort / Taz / Anthony / Klo / Becky Fox / Dean Michael / Sophie Chivers / Carey Seuthe / Charley A / KC / Jam Rainbird / Nathan Smith / Amanda McCall / Tamsyne Smith-Harding / Hannah J / Ezra Peregrine / BrynWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to trusty hogs with me, Catherine Bohart, Helen Bauer, two fantastic comedians. Normally, we're solving your... That made it feel like your Catherine Bohart and Ellen Bauer. I loved it. With me, Catherine Bohart and Ellen Bauer. Love it, go on. Okay, I meant to be... No, you can't challenge the quiz master.

Okay, you're right, you're right. I'm sorry. We're in your house, Andrew. Sorry for interrupting you. I, despite the last 30 seconds, I have all the authority here. I am in Pitchard for our special. 150th episode. Yay!

150th! Through the fog. Step forth the trusty hogs. Yeah, you're going to give them your problems and they will solve them. Or maybe they won't and that's your problem. They'll have guests and Andrew White on the tech. Oh, it's Helen and Catherine as the truth. Trusty hugs.

Trust the trusty hogs or maybe not. A hundred and fifty. That is mad. Can you believe it? I told Sineal, I was like, we're doing our 150th episode today and he was like, oh, that little. I was like, I'm fucking joking. Is he high?

That's three years worth. He's like, you've just been doing it for ages. I thought you'd have done way more than that. And I was like, oh, you know what? Just be happy for us. How do you get fucked, Sineal? That's literally what he needs to do. They don't let me say that on radio for, but go.

Fuck yourself, Samil Benel. What the hell? 150 is so many. It's huge. We have to plan everyone. Right? I think that's impressive. We had to plan everyone.

We didn't necessarily plan everyone, but we had to. We were supposed to. But this one, you've put in earrings. That seems like you've planned it, Andrew. We've got a bit of a different setting today because we're doing a quiz. So I'm your quiz master.

I've got my velvet quiz master jacket. I am available for any TV, as is every comedian in the UK right now. Not me. Not me. I'm booked a blast. so we're going to go through I think we've got seven rounds

six rounds plus a bonus round I'm not quite entirely sure we'll see as we get through you need to know I know but I don't have it to my mind okay oh my god Catherine this is us having to let go

of control of the podcast I won't let go and I won't let go and you are struggling immediately there is X amount of rounds that we don't know about and that's it let it be okay

is this going to be we're just going to flow we're going to go with the flow we're going to answer each question as it comes up on your whiteboard. I actually do with my periods. I can go with the flow. That's fine. Very nice. Do you want to show everyone on your whiteboards? You've got your names?

Woohoo. Mine says Helen Bauer and I've written the cool S because I listened to Avra Levine. And also, is this like school? You know when like if you went into like GCSE or A level, like if you didn't write anything down but you wrote your name, you got three marks? No. No? Okay. Mine says Catherine and then it has a heart with a piggy tail. That's really cute. An extra point for that. I'm right down my point, my extra point. Are you serious?

Yeah, why not? Well, I'll do a fucking picture of a pig. I don't care of a shit. No, that would be derivative now. Derivative? Yeah, yeah. I think you're really handsome and really talented. Thank you.

A bonus point for Helen, actually. What the fuck? I'm a very easily swayed question mark. No, but from now on I do think you need to stick to points for answers. Very strict answering points only. We start on a level playing field, one point each for your beautiful drawing and your lovely compliment. So we're going to get straight into it If you want to play along at home

Go to trusty hogs.com forward slash quiz And there will be some sort of play sheet So you can also join in with the questions As I say The Hoggs are way better than me Yeah, oh, some of the questions are from the Hogs I put it out to our executive producers As a little perk for their support

That they could offer questions for the quiz Their question's going to be hard They know more about us than we know about ourselves They are 100% do Also I'm very if we may just stay our current, like our, I guess our status going into the quiz. I'm scared. As many of you know, I have never listened to a single episode of the podcast. I thank you for listening, but I don't know how you do it. It's a headache in a can as far as I'm concerned. And I really appreciate you

being so supportive, but honestly, I don't wish to know that much about myself. If I listen to it, I would know it exists in truth and that what we're saying does, in fact, get put out into the world and I'd never do it again. So I am worried that I won't know the answer to any of the questions, given that they are based on the episodes. How do you feel, Helen? A lot more confident than that. I listen to every episode in full that I'm not on. So, like, whenever I'm away, I've listened to the whole episode.

I do dip in and out because I'm subscribed, right? You're supposed to be away. I'm on holiday when I'm not here. I'm one of the, I support it. I'm a subscriber on YouTube and on the podcast app. Grow up. So I like it. Grow up.

Yeah, you reply to comment sometimes. I do reply to comment sometimes. Sometimes Andrew just told me that. I was like, damn, I didn't know anyone could see that. Just being like, yeah, no, I know. And, yeah, I think I'm more like, I'm more of a fan of it. Catherine is not a fan at all. It's not that I'm not a fan.

It's just that I can't be in it and observe it. Like, in the same way that I can't listen to recordings of myself really or watch myself on television. I just, I find myself so unbearable that I wouldn't do anything if I had to perceive myself as well as while I did it. is I'm curious enough that I'm like, go on. You were your sisterly way of saying

you quite enjoy yourself. I'm like, go on, let's have a little enjoyment time with me. I'm just going to make sure my phone's on the airplane mode. So I think... It's on the airplane mode, everyone don't worry. I think I'll be better than Catherine. I believe so. We want no cheating, very clean.

To say I believe so. What kind of neutral arbiter are you? Part of it is manifestation. Well, if anything, you want me to believe in Helen Moore so that I give you more leniency, surely. Carry on. Yeah. No cheating.

We don't want any sort of coughs from M. Alah, who wants to be a millionaire. Nothing like that. God, do it. It's a fun and fair game. There are some Hogs adjacent general knowledge questions. So you don't have to know the podcast entirely, right? So there's some points you can get without having to listen.

Oh, God, that's worse. That being said, if you are very new to trusty hogs, and this is your first episode, pick another one maybe. It's the most inside baseball. We've had a lot of inside baseball episodes. Yeah, but this would be crazy to start here, wouldn't it? Yeah, I wouldn't start here. I'd just go back to our last episode.

Although you did start here. That was like me practicing for the theory test for driving. I was just like, fuck it. I'll just do it and see how I get on. Not well. Not well. You do have to study, actually. What would be fun is if you start here and then you go relisten from episode one,

and then when you get back to this episode, you can recap and go, oh, and I get that now. Yeah, that fun retesting yourself. Yeah, that doesn't sound fine at all. For all our Catherine type. home just for fun. So we're on the quiz. We're on the quiz now, yes.

Round one. History Corner. Okay, I'll be great at this. So these are Hogs-adjacent history questions. Oh, God, okay. If one of the answers is not 31st of August, 997, I'm going to lose my mind. I'm also really regretting saying that out loud now because Catherine will take that day in. Don't worry.

I would never be so basic. Okay. That being said, we do start with a Trusty Hogs classic, the Titanic. Yes. And this is a question from Simon Moore, our executive producer. Hi, Simon. Hi, Simon. Who asks, what year did the Titanic sink, and for bonus points, the exact date?

Okay, I know the year, and I think it was the... Don't say out loud, Helen. No. Right. Helen, Catherine, reveal your boards. 1912, 20th of April. And you've got... I said 1917, I was way old.

You're a moron. It's way before World War I. It was indeed 1912. However, it was the 14th of April. Motherfow! So I won't give you the bonus point, but that is one point to Helen Bauer. I originally wrote 12th of April. Damn it.

That would have been closer. I should know that. but I don't, it turns out. Well, we'll move to Irish history next, so maybe you'll be better with this one. I'm glad I was in a decade. Oh, no, I'm scared. I'm going to get this wrong.

Question two. Which British monarch oversaw the Great Famine? Who was the reigning monarch of Britain during the Great Famine? Fuck. I've got it. I think. Hang on.

Yeah. Catherine doing some heavy thinking. Helen, very confident, very quick. You may have even heard her scribbles on the microphone there. I'm so sure I'm right I'm right Catherine's gone Irish history degree

no wait this isn't right no it is right it is right it is right I'm right it was a long time though that famine bloody hell

I know I did some research awful did you know that really bad show your answers I don't know can you show your boards Queen Victoria

and you've gone for Elizabeth the first Elizabeth the first That is far too early, I'm afraid. It is Queen Victoria. Yes, power! One of the horrible facts I learned about... We actually have to edit that out.

I'm so embarrassed by that answer. No, we are not editing any of this album. This is in sec. If anything. Elizabeth was the past was the Tudors. That checks out, but she's the only one I could remember from the film. What I love to think is that you knew it was a fucking woman. I know it was a woman.

Honestly, that was it. I was like, it's a woman, but which one? Victoria. Yeah. In many ways, isn't it very pro-Irish to not care about English history? Yeah. I like that as a stance. God,

I'm, Joe, so, this is so bad. We were talking about this beforehand and now I am making excuses but Cetalopram makes my brain

fucking running. No, we're not, we're not blaming drugs. I'm on Satraline. Oh, God, okay. One of the horrible facts I learned about the famine doing research for this

is that... I'm a dumb bit. No, you're not. I just listen to a lot of history podcasts. I have a history. I'm from Ireland. Yeah.

I think there's one that you're definitely going to get at the very least of this round. That's not helping maybe you should say something else like you're so brilliant in other way somebody saying pretty you're so fair

you look like um jodi coma and prima facie okay um third question please third question in which english county was princess diana born oh come on helen county county yes yeah got it oh my god i'm really sorry

i really thought that the first two you'd at least get a couple of points Fair, I should have gotten both the first two But I've had a guess I didn't know if it's a county It's not, I've just seen Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait Wait!

I'll give you another chance, con Wait! What does you per? Wait! Put Durham. Durham! No, County Durham! It's Durham a county! I'm so sorry, Catherine. Don't, also, you can't look out of board

and give a hell. And I can't change it to be fair. She's put Durham, I put Suffolk. Oh, no, it's North Fork, I'm afraid. Damn it! Do you know what? Catherine, I'm really with you on this quiz.

It was right next to Sandringham. Helen's very, very smart, and we have both come out of this looking very stupid. Thank you. I didn't know Durham was the county. I didn't pronounce tenement properly. It's not going well for us. No, that's okay. I'm the smartest.

But we already knew that. Only, it's Helen who always acts like she's dumb, but everyone who knows she's the smartest. And I am truly the eye candy and bimbo of this podcast. Can I quickly say something about that? You're like the fifth person this year who's like stopped a conversation and been like, stop pretending to be so dumb. to me and I had a really good chat my friend Anna Grant about it because she said it

she was like I was going to do my whip in Edinburgh and I was saying at hers and she was like do you remember you don't have to pretend to be stupid and I was like pretend like I'm not pretending and I had like a good chat with her and I was like pretty sick of people saying this because like people think I'm pretending to be still I'm not doing anything and we figured out

it's just because I breathe through my mouth is that it's just the breathing through the mouth and I think it just means people are like she's pretending to be thick and it's like no I just can't use my nose right but my brain's working it's astonishing given that there's no option coming through the nose

okay that always said it was because I asked questions instead of just going along no I think I ask questions too but I think we're both ends of the extreme I think you do a lot of

I'm only a baby that's different that's therapy no but that does lend itself to people thinking that you know less than you do I'm a smart four-year-old. And then I go the other way, which is that, like, I ooze authority, but I have no clue what the fuck I'm talking about.

You do, you do ooze authority. People always follow me in places. I have no sense of direction. People are constantly following, and I'll be like, where are we going? I remember I used to follow you back in 2017. I used to follow you, and I've not done it since. Awful, awful. Like, the fact that we were recording in Soho for so long,

and you never knew where OXA Street was. Nope. Despite the fact it was the next street. Couldn't learn. Every single time. Couldn't learn, wouldn't learn. It was mental. I get lost in the genuinely circular park in front of my house.

That is confusing. Circles are hard. It's actually the shape of a boot, but it's still confusing. Apparently if you walk at the gate, you won't get lost, but I do. Right, we'll rattle on with this. Is it still history corner? It's still history corner. I can't if I got the Diana one wrong.

I was so close county wise. So far. Very close, right. Adjacent. Which famous literary horror figure was originated by an Irish author? Which famous literary horror figure was originated by an Irish author? Got it. I think I know purely going off.

Do I have it? Surnames and famous. Unless, brands. Brants. Stoker. Stoker. Well, you're really thinking out loud there, aren't you? Stalker. Stalker. Stalker. Have you been your answer down?

Yes. Can I talk some through? Shelly. Stoker. Shelly. Okay, I've got my answer Okay, and reveal Franklin's dying

It was Dracula Damn it, Bran Stoker's Irish Yes Shelly feels more Irish to me 1897 Was Bram Stoker Irish Writing in London though I don't know why he went

You know what, good for him And look at me I got one Yeah, we're on the box baby We are now unfortunately Back to Helen Territory With some dictator chat Oh god

What does Stalin mean In English, roughly. Man of blank. What does they mean? Man of what, Stalin? Oh my God. I have no idea. They did not,

Paul McGahn did not cover this. Really? I'm going to take an educated guess, though. It's not his real name. Fuck. Okay, you ready? Reveal. Steel.

I put peasants. It was steel. It was steel. How? I don't know if that's strong isn't it's steel you know oh mother fuck I was feeling so good about myself I can't believe it's man of steel yeah man of steel Stalin like Superman yeah oh my god I thought he was like the people of the peasants maybe no no yeah good yeah good idea wow Catherine well done I'm so proud of myself yeah we're all proud of you oh and I think I think you might get the next one as well no don't jinx it everything said that I don't Don't get it. Amon de Valera was the first person in Ireland

to hold which political position. I wouldn't need the correct spelling as well. Oh my God. Are you fucking... Oskuega? No, no. Just write. As long as I can understand,

legibility is the crucial thing in quizzing. No, I do think you have to actually write the word. Or say it correctly, one of the two. You can spell it or say it right. lots of concentration from helen bower here having a lot of fun with it can i say it with an accent go on then we're real we're ready yeah okay lord of the dance slash president what have you gone on tishook uh it is tishook um

lord of the dance the president isn't the t shook yeah there's two separate things i'm afraid you are not correct do i get a point for jokes though no no that was really funny that was funny that was funny but this podcast is not about funny it's about factually correct if you're at home and you want to know how to pronounce T-shuck think the drink tea and what you do to an oyster shuck t-shuck

and what is that exactly it's a prime minister and then the president is like the head of state although technically he wasn't the first prime minister but he was the first person to be T-Shook it used to be the

prime minister of president of the council or something like that but it was devolved power yeah yeah okay we're finally on doing a bit of history i remember next um well are we go on go on no what you're asking i think you've got more points than me no i think we're three three each now aren't we four each actually yeah i'm on four i just had a really good start and it's gone down what are you talking about hang on i got question four five and six right and she got question one two and one and two right so it's three

to two we both got question three wrong four three and um because you got a point for drawing your beautiful heart. That has what's thrown me. Sorry. I'm really sorry for getting very angry about this pointing system. Sorry for making such intense eye contact when I said, what are you talking about? But I do feel better now. Go on. Okay. Well, we'll end on a question from another executive producer, Neil Redmond. Hi, Neil Redmond. He's asked, if your surname is Cooper, what would your historical profession likely be? I know this one. If your surname is Cooper. It's also sort of trust your adjacent in a way that I will back explain after you have your answers. I want to know how it's trusty hogs adjacent, but I do know the answer.

I think I do. No, I'm back on myself, I know. Right. You ready to reveal? No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Quite a long answer there. I'm just trying to put in the, I don't know what the word is, so I'm just trying to describe it. Okay.

Are you ready? I've got the word. I'll let you explain on your answer. You don't have to write it all down. Okay. Ready? Okay, go. Barrel maker.

I got like bird management. Bird slash pigeon-minding. Or the post with the birds. slash chicken She's written exactly bird slash pigeon slash minding slash the post

you know they take the post and then chicken farmer It's not that No it is barrel making Yes We have our Edinburgh live shows At the monkey barrel Yes

There we go Thank you Neil for that question Oh my god I'm so fucking smart Slash went to school With a girl called Hevercuba Oh That was a really good round

Andrew Thank you very much It only gets more fun From here Yes Wow So what are we are The one.

Currently, I believe the score is for each, yes. Woohoo! I'm already doing way better than I expected and if I'd gotten the ones I should have gotten, I'd be killing it.

I feel like we've both got each other's answers as to what you thought we'd know we've got the opposite. Isn't that surprising? I got the Diana and Stalin one wrong. Like what the... Yeah, that is surprising. That's really surprising.

Okay, so we go on to round two, which is quotes. Andrew, I'd just like to say I'm having a lovely time. Good, I'm very glad. I know you've already seen sort of the worst of me, but that always happens at a quiz

and the first time Ellen and I almost broke up was when we went to a quiz together and she left and I'd met her best friend for the first time Anna and Anna and I had a great time because we're very similar but when we got home Ellen said that I couldn't tell her

to go fuck herself in Poplar You're being quite calm Right? You're taking it very well Thank you guys That's because the points are back up if it went wrong after those first two questions Oh yeah the fact that we're back on evens helps a lot

Yeah All right let's go Okay, quotes. Cogito, where I go, Sam? No, no, these are quotes from Trustee Hoggs. Oh, God. Yes. They are fill in the blank questions.

Emma has got the audio of a Trusty Hogg's quote. See if you can fill in the bleeped word. Okay. It's not from last two weeks. Question one. Question one. I think that your stance on n-h is my stance on f***ch, and my stance on f*** is I've either never had it or I've always had it.

This is Charlie Clive here. Yeah. You don't get a point from guessing who. it is. It's Charlie Clive. Charlie Clive! Sweet, Charlie, of course she's in the quote section. She has such beautiful diction. There are actually two words there.

Your stance on blank, that's number one, is my stance on blank. That's number two. I'm going to make you reveal in five seconds. Okay, yeah, I'm ready. Okay, let's go. Turn. First words, nits, second word, thrush. Damn it, you're right.

I got thrush and I got shit. It is nits. It is knit. Yes! As soon as you turned it, I was like, damn it. I remember the conversation. I remember not. being believed.

But Helen should get one point, right? Yes. Do I get one for Thrust? Two for Catherine, one for Helen. Damn it. Nips! Yes. It says Charlie Clive, because you said you never had Nits. If you don't believe in Nets. No, I do believe in Nits.

I've just never had them. It's like Andrew... Which isn't true. You can't go through school and not have Nets. I didn't have Nits. I don't know what to tell you. This is like Andrew and Hayfever all over at him. No, he doesn't believe in Hayfever.

I believe in Nits. I just haven't had them. Hayfever is a corporate ruse. For sake. From big farmer. is it? That's what Blackfusses. They're getting at you. Yeah, yeah. Charlie's in on holiday at the moment and I was really nice to hear her voice. Oh, how lovely. It's really lovely. Well, we have another friend of the podcast here, Sophie Duker for quote number two. Can you finish the quote? Ages ago. This was episode 10, yes.

So my housemate went to a sex party and there there was like a toilet. It was like an all like female non-binary sex party, but the toilet. What was the toilet? What was special about the toilet? I know this one. I had this all-female non-binary sex party. You can't, you can't forget this conversation. Please reveal. Was a man. Was a man.

Yes, but the toilet was a man. The toilet was a man. The toilet was a man. That's a point each. I swear someone that I knew then went to that party and was like, yeah, I went at this party and the toilet was a man. And I was like, yeah, I've heard about this party. I wish I did not know about this party.

I wish I didn't get that right. Our next quote is from Nish Kumar. Oh, God. And we want you to tell us what. he's talking about so he's talking about something from live uh no this was from uh in our our soho studio this is okay thank god thank god thank god yeah this 2020 i was drunk for the first half of the live yeah i was very drunk for it particularly that live yeah there are no live questions don't worry thank god so what is nish kumar talking about in this quote if you two host of

i'd watch every day we've all seen the ultimate tonal shift two two of the key pieces of british television but there's one of the shillings where they go from. And that dog could really bark the national anthem. Cancer affects one in two of us. Okay, please reveal your boards. The one show? It is the one show, yes. Yes.

We both got it. Catherine, we are so good. You're really good at the quotes. You're worried about this, but you're really doing a good job. I'm actually worried now people are playing along at home again. No points. We'll be like, yeah, we're too invested in our own stuff. No, they'll get the points.

Yeah, yeah. You've also picked very memorable conversations. yeah these are really good choices you guys I'm both like having a lovely time of the quiz and like having this sort of sense of euphoria that we delegated and M and Andrew have nailed it oh yeah they've had to do a lot of research

it's so reassuring to be working with people who are so competent and capable God what's the real you are really on your parents a lovely compliment thank you are you fucking joking I got a point for a compliment she's angry

she's so mad she's so mad I suck you off point for Helen no no no no if I didn't think mine is a point for a threat there's my finger up with my finger up your ass

yeah one of minus points to that yeah our next quote speaking of consent is from Sunil to Helen this is episode 83 so Sunil's return to the podcast

what is Sunil warning Helen against I love Stop people when they don't want to be... Oh, something else for having a... Stop blanking people

when they don't want to be blanked. That's... I'll give you a clue. It's not threatening to wank off and finger them. I'm assuming it can only be the one thing that he's still upset about, but we've moved on a little bit now.

Stop blanking people when they don't want to be blanked. Sunil to Helen. It could be... It could be anything. No, but it's all in the same... But the specific word is tricky because it could be like... I think I know the word.

Okay, I'm going to give five seconds. Because five, four, three, you ready, two, one, go. Cuddy. I should have gone cuddling, but I went touching. Well, actually, you're both wrong. It's kissing. I was literally thinking because it's moved on to kissing because it's so good at Cuddy Club now.

And then it's like, really? Yeah. Stop kissing people when they don't want to be kissed. But now he does do nighttime kissing. Well, I wonder what the next quote is going to be. On the cheek. This is mad. You're going to have like, he's conceded we can marry.

And then because he's done it He's hugged and given Alexa a kiss on the cheek You know Sean's wife a couple of times And then she messaged me when Trustee Hoggs Live went up Yeah yeah But when that went online

That video of him on your birthday at midnight Giving you a kiss on the cheek Alexa messaged me being like Oh my God he's doing it He's doing it And I was like look again at the video Catherine prompts him You go like this

If you haven't seen the live video from last week Catherine goes Well no I said I actually go we should kiss and I thought he was going to kiss me on the mouth but instead he went for a very delicate kiss on my cheek because he's been trained it was beautiful

but damn it we neither us get a point not even for Cuddy no I'm afraid not Cuddy and Kissy come in the same bracket now I don't think so no they do not poor Senil he is tired isn't he yeah

yeah this time our next question is actually a quote from one of you and it's from Helen giving advice to Amy Gledhill it's going to be poo I'm doing a shot 1245 and then mine

ends up 3.30. Holy fuck, Amy. So it's like quite a big, big injection of anxiety. Big afternoon. Big afternoon. And like bed by six. That's really never going to do that.

No. You will, you will, one day. You will one day. And all you have to do in between time is have a... Because it refreshes you and fully, yeah, yeah, yeah. Obviously, I know exactly what is up there. All you have to do in between time is have what. It's the same advice I'd give now.

And it's clearly good advice because Amy Glit Hill went on to win the Edinburgh Comedy World this year. So true. Can't believe you'd bring that off. And Catherine came second Catherine came unofficial second Catherine came unofficial second Okay you ready

You should know this just from knowing me And the advice I have For refreshing yourself during the day What What did Amy Goodhill I've had a guess at a wank Yeah wanky It is actually a nana and a wank

But I will give you each a half point Oh my God I actually would say a nana and a wank Because of the protein and the potassium A nana and a wank yeah A nana and a wank at the same time. Because it refreshes you.

It does refresh you. Do we get a point each? Half a point. Yeah. Just give us a point. Give us a point each, you bitch. Wow. Minus one point for Helen.

Oh, you're bitch. Give us a point eight. No, don't mind us one. You're really beautiful on your hair's incredible. So Helen's lost a point there. I'll look you out. I can't believe you're the one who lost a point for abusing the quiz masters. Yeah, that was.

unexpected. I really thought it would be me. Give us a point you, bitch. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That felt really fun at the time, but it wasn't okay to say. It wasn't okay to say. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please find my point back. I'm actually sorry. Oh, no, I'm sorry. Well, Helen, you have a chance to win a point at the next question, which is another quote from you. Well, actually, it's a quote from Chelsea Berkby who is unsure about something you have claimed. What have you claimed in this clip? I think I know this already, purely caused this. This was a trusty hogs meme. I really can.

I think it's dangerous to have that belief. Yeah, I mean, I agree. I agree. I believe at 120%. What does Helen believe? I don't believe that. I genuinely can. It's like my brain works that way.

I thinks it's dangerous to have this belief. Am I really like your socks and trainer combo. Really fighting hard for that point back, aren't you? Yeah. I have no idea what this is. so I'm just thinking you think that would be dangerous to hell and so I've written, I can do the split. I can. I'll give you your point back if you do the splits.

I can see around corners. I'll do the splits. Do I get a point if I do the split? Yes, yeah, yeah. I can see around, you can see around corners? I'm talking full splits. Don't fucking come to me with a half-a. My mum said it was a gift and that all about our women had because she can still do them. She's my 17. Let me film this.

Oh God, can I actually still do it. Holy shit! How. Helen. Yes. And my genuine admiration. Power. Power.

Power. That was really fucking impressive. Helen, that was so, you didn't have such ease. And I can see around corners. You can't see around corners, but that is what you said in the clip. I can. Why does not believe me? Wait, Helen.

Wait, that was unbelievable. I know it's a bower skill. Also, Helen, you did it with such as. My mum can jump in the air and land in them. Or she says she can still. She used to do her parties. Like a Dallas Cowgirl. I can just do them

That was amazing That was really impressive Do you do yoga? No You should You're so flexible I'm too flexible if anything That was remarkable

Thank you That was so sexy Never had a gymnastics class Wow So two points of Helen there One for the splits One for the correct answer Of seeing round corners

And I can And I can Okay Okay Well Chelsea Buckby Myself Catherine And I'm all skeptical of that And worried.

You were skeptical about splits? Yeah, to be fair, we proved wrong. We approved wrong. Episode 7, we go to a Catherine quote. Here we go. Sometimes I think there's then poppers too. Yeah, that's your community, Angela. Thank you.

That's the gay community. We don't need to call anyone out, but, you know. No, no, but yeah. Nobody had that natural teenage high of like, you know. And finishing it? Nobody had that natural. A natural teenage high of blank and finishing it. What was Catherine getting high on in her teen years?

So sad. Yes, you could literally feel the atmosphere deflate at the end of that clip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's something really sweet. You're harsh and you're rude. It's going to be something really sweet and really good at progressing your educational career. Okay.

What do you think, Helen? I think it's finishing homework. I've got making a to-do list. It's actually reading a really good book. Oh, God, Chris! Fuck, I'm so cute. You're so cute. Oh, you're only tiny.

Finishing a real natural eye. In all fairness, I do go high. It's a real surreal, isn't it? That teenage high. I loved to read. I love to read. Can she lose a point for being a fucking dweb? No, that's unkind telling.

Unkind, sorry, Catherine. Yeah. You're very scared about losing points now, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're behaving all of them. How are we on points? With one final quote, which is also a bridging quote into our next round. Can...

Nine, ten. Ten with Catherine there in the lead. But maybe that will all change with this final question. With a horrific listener email, can you finish their terrible anecdote? About 10 years ago, I was on a night out with a straight girl. I was madly in love with. She was my gay awakening, and we would occasionally sleep together when we felt so inclined. Incredible.

We would occasionally sleep together? I guess so, yeah. She's referring to her as a straight woman. Maybe that's not, that's gay. That's at least bye. Unless he means to share a bed. Okay. Oh, no, no, she doesn't mean sleep.

Two sentences later, she uses the phrase hanky-panky. Woo-hoo. That night, I ended up particularly drunk. We went back to hers with some friends for an after-party and eventually snuck off to her room for some hanky-panky. Okay. She's not, you can't call her a straight woman. No. Unless she identifies that way.

In which case... You can identify a straight and make out with the women. I've made out with loads of women. Okay, but... Not hanky-panky in the left. No. Yeah. Remember you then?

Stop that. Wait, pause it for a second. That is mental. I am really like... Part of me does need to go back and listen to the podcast. I'd be like, how did we know? not know.

We did know. We knew, but we didn't. No, because like, someone points out, you referred to me as like the straightest woman alive on so many episodes. But that's more like your energy. Right? Yeah.

But like, come on. You can identify as straight and still make out with women. You're still my, you're still like the straightest woman I know. You're still the straightest woman I know. For sure. But yeah, no, that's deranged. It's so funny listening to past hell and being like,

I think you can finger a woman and speak. You'll be straight. I'm not gay. It's a little weird. I'm just fingering and sharing bath with them, you fucking nutcase. Yeah. Sorry, I'll continue. Go on.

I must have fallen asleep. The next thing I knew, I was squatting, naked on the stairs. Yes. Here we go. Here we go. I do think the quote gave it away. Yeah, what do you think? Shit.

Shit. Shitting on the landing. I will give you both the point. The actual answer is taking a shit into my own hands. That's it! Oh my God, I remember this! Oh, you know what? Wherever you are, we hope you're okay.

And speaking of sleepwalking, that brings us to our bonus rounds. Wait, if it's a question about sleepwalking, I have relived this so many times. This is the stairwell of shame. Okay, I know this. This is a five-question bonus round. Question one, during the telling of the stairwell story, Helen is wearing a t-shirt but jewelled with a rhinestone image of which Australian animal. A rhinestone image of which Australian animal?

God, that's a great question. Thank you very much. And also, I know exactly what it is because I only bought one t-shirt from Australia. You ready? What have you got? Coala. Yeah, it's a koala and it's Australia

and it's really, really fashionable. It's red, right? Yeah, it's red, and it's gorgeous. And I didn't buy a t-shirt in Australia this year because I was like, that was so good. I don't need to get a new one. You got it. You loved it, didn't you, Catherine?

Loved it. You loved my Diamante Torres T-shirts. Yep. Points all round. So complete this following quote. I'll just read it to you. okay um this is helen talking about not stinking of piss just for reference this i'm not singing of piss thank god i had the foresight to blank thank god i had the foresight to blank

what did helen do but i feel like i know how i would how i think about okay what have we got i've got squat i'm going to say not wear any clothes so the smell was gone from no katherine should get the point is split my leg Thank God I had the foresight I'm so disgusting You were like Oh it's not on my legs Thank God I had the floor sight

Because she's a bower woman She can just I can split my legs wide open No freaking stress that Imagine if you woke up naked in the splits Yeah I'm kissing myself in the split And we're like Foresight baby

I'm a fucking junior If you don't know this episode It is one of our more iconic ones Go back and listen to it It is episode number that's question three what is the episode number okay

I feel like you both know this because we got asked about it a lot I've heard you tell people the episode number and refer to it but am I right wait let me work this out it was

when did I get back May last year is there can you take as long as you want no we'll give a five seconds five four three two one

can it be closest to get to the point yeah yeah we can do that I've gone 78. I've gone 97. Oh, you are closest. It's actually 86.

Fuck. Please go back and listen to episode 86. I believe it's called stairwells. Shade, sleepwalking, stairwells and shame. Yes, please. Please do go back and listen to that. It's the episode I feel like I listened to because I didn't know any of the information in the podcast.

I remember the whole day I was just like, everything you said, I was like, wait. I just remember saying, wait, wait, wait over and over again because you try to move on to the next part of the story and I'd be like I have 74 back of questions

Wait I do remember you did listen to this one because you rung me from bed with Ellen listening to it being like we're doing a listener do you want to like listening to Ellen obviously not obviously I do not need a play by play from someone else hearing this for the first time

I re-listen to it for this quiz it's really funny it's a very funny episode question four which hymn does Helen sing in her panicked retelling of asking the night receptionist for help she's naked on the street

buzzing the receptionist and in the panic of her retelling she sings a hymn which hymn does she sing oh I could be wrong I wasn't sing this in the actual story she sung this while retelling the story but so yeah I did not sing

no I can give you the exact quote of what you gave to the receptionist I'm held up out of room 221 I'm naked on the street I promise I'm staying at this hotel And it was room two, two, one. Shout out again to that exact room number. That was going to be one of the questions, but I abandoned it.

Okay, what do you think the hymn was? Catherine, you've got an answer? I've got two answers, and I don't know which one it is, but I'm going to tick out my second one. Okay, great, gone then. I crossed out, let it shine, and left in all things bright as beautiful. That's such a beautiful, optimistic retelling of Helen's story, but actually the answer is,

were you there? I was cold, I was naked, Are you there? Why are you there? I don't know that one, so I just guess. And our final question, speaking of the night receptionist, what is the only word

he utters in the story whilst leading Helen back to her room? This is such a me round because like, I lived it. Never. This must happen all the time. Never. Beautiful.

I also did talk about it in my tour show and that like, never haunts me still. I've got four of the first. five. Yeah, you did really well out of that. And it's also lucky that it's the only episode she's rarely listened to. Yeah.

Also, that story's burned in my mind and I've also seen your tour show. It's also burned in my mind. Weird. Oh man, that was funny. Truly burnt in my mind. I bet you everyone who is like a Patreon absolutely smash that round.

Yeah, oh yeah. Surely that's the one you re-listened to all the time. Yeah, I would have thought so. You know it was our most shared episode in 2023? Yeah, I'm sure because people were just like sending it to WhatsApp boots being like, don't feel bad. Have you ever heard this?

I turned up to comedians football one week and everyone was like, I love the hell I'm pissing story. I'm like, oh, okay. I told you I went to do, um, is it cool story bro? Like Kyle Smith-Bino's like improv night and they were like, we have all listened to that pissing episode. And I was like, shut the fuck up. Like I feel like so cool to be invited to hang out with these people.

We're in a theater. Yeah, could we behave? No, but truly people tell me it all the time. My question, it's usually when I've said, I think, like, literally right, like two seconds before and I'll be like, I think Helen and I could be like a young Mel and Sue. Like, I think we could like post something very dynamically together on television and people would be like, we loved her pissing story. And I'm like, or nighttime, evening television. We have to go back and delete so many episodes to become wholesome presenters. And I do, yeah, I have a couple of things that need to go.

I feel like three of the answers have been poo so far. Just the one, but they all stick in your mind. What's the score? The score, I believe, is maybe it's, I think, Catherine, you're still slightly in the lead? 1513. There you go. So beautiful. It's a pretty evenly matched quiz.

Look at this jacket. Isn't it nice? You're not getting bonus points, Catherine or Helen. So what round are we on? This is round three. Uh, guest sees all questions about previous guests. So how well have you listened? I think this is fair because we take turns if anyone doesn't know.

So we book the guests together. But we like, I'll book one, you book one. So like, it's pretty even as far as how we do this. That's just the admin. That's not who knows the best. I don't remember anything. But we do like, I'll ask the one that I know best and you'll ask the one that. Otherwise, we're just sort of like WhatsApping someone being like, you know, Catherine Bowler.

Oh, God. Well, you might know the first question because it's a very recent episode here in the audio always studio with Michelle Brazier. Yes. What is Michelle Brazier's dog? job what is the job of Michelle Brazier's beautiful pooch

oh wait no it's not that it's concentrated oh my god what's the word when they take them into five seconds

five four three two one Helen's still writing Catherine's got like it's like

the guide dog PR girl I will accept that emotional support training. No, because she's actually an ambassador. That's an ambassador. She was too friendly to be a guy dog.

Can you see I've written an A there? Oh my goodness. Can you see the A? That is ridiculous. That is no. There's an A. There's an A and then I put the E on top of it. No.

Am I put an A? One point for Catherine, not for Helen. But Catherine got it wrong. Piargo. Our next question is about Laura Ramoso. Okay. What was her controversial favorite pasta dish?

Laura, half German, half Italian. So obviously her thoughts on pasta Okay Very important Yes But she shocked the room When she revealed her favourite pastor was

Carbonara Correct Yes Lou! Laura! You idiot I love Carbonara Have you seen the Heinz Carbinar? Who's? Hines have got Carbinar and a tin now

They're doing like a tin of it now Have you not had It sounds rancid I didn't buy that Although I'll tell you what I've made twice Already in the last five days What? Cacua pepe

Ellen has just been edited about it. And it's just cheesy pasta with pepper, but she thinks it's like the fanciest thing I've ever made. It's so like 2007. Well, I'm making it every evening and let's not tell her because she's loving 2017. For anyone who didn't hear that, that was possibly the bitchiest thing I've ever seen MD. How is she just hearing about it? That's so 2017. It was really like M works in food, energy, wasn't it? Very. But then I saw on, well, wait till you hear this from 2017. Then I saw this woman who I know who's a wine influencer was having Cacchio a Pepe popcorn in New York and it looked phenomenal.

Oh, that sounds really nice. So what years that from him? Twenty-twenty-four. 2018, she's saying. Right. Is that a point thing? Our next question is another earlier episode back in the shipping container. Oh, my God. Whoa.

Which alt-rock band is one of James Acaster and Nish Kumar's only topics of conversation. James Acosta revealed that whenever he meets Nish Kumar, they almost exclusively talk about the time they met and this alt rock band I remember this conversation because it's like we only talk about that and I remember thinking like I've got

friends that I just discussed this one thing with but a band? It was a band and he I think you also got it as a CD and his yeah I couldn't even name an old rock band okay I'm gonna put down one okay ready yeah reveal Oasis

Nerd boys clubs for losers true but not right not an old rock band the answer is REM everybody heard oh I know that song yeah there you go sometimes my dad likes them

and back to back to a more recent episode with another taskmaster contestant and winner indeed Sam Campbell who this was recent improvised

slash pre-prepared a sketch with Helen do you remember this oh god I don't remember this and at the end of the sketch Helen dies for what reason what is Helen's cause of death

in Sam Campbell's mystic sketch this is unfair because we did actually, you can't tell on the episode, but we did rehearse this for a full day. You absolutely cannot tell. To the... What did she die? Bringing it to the studio.

Because you are blank. Why did I die, Kath Wynne? Five, four, three, two, one. Disappointment. I died of being too beautiful. It was too beautiful. Oh, for the love of God. what a great reason to die oh my god okay this next one is closest wins um it's such a bizarre question

to ask this really is a mental podcast i'm sucking what is evelyn mocks cup size oh my god i've got to go into my mind palace of touch then yeah sorry she ever yeah evelyn was the first one to get to the and the helen bower sizing experience just cup just cup yeah what episode was this um oh like Yeah, it was the teens Stop it, okay, let me just picture Oh, Evelyn actually stayed in my room For a full month when I was in Australia And I should have like seen as she left a bra or something

But I think she was wearing the wrong bra size Yeah, I feel like she was, I'm literally cupping them in my mind right now Okay, five, four, three, two, one E. Double D. It is E! Back on! I should have trusted myself, I had E in my head That was an idiot, man

But yeah, no point for Catherine I know, I'm sorry. Yeah, good for Evelyn, that is like a really well-done rack. Yeah, that's nice. Like, really gorgeous. And Evelyn. Yes, that's how you can remember.

Oh, for God, sick, I should have remembered, Dot. Oh, my God. We'll skip to our final question in the guest round. Can you name the six guests who have not appeared on the main episode, but have been a live guest? So our six live guests who have never graced our studio? You get a half point for each person you can name. What the hell? Yeah.

So we've had six guests only be live, not in the studio. I don't think I can name one. I don't think you name one? Wait, wait a second. You're going to have to play some music in the edit to give us a minute to think of this. Yeah, hang on, okay. I was so drunk for so many lives.

I can only think of two, both of which then came on the main episode. I will give you a clue. One of them. No, no, no clues. Oh, my, you're so not fun. Well, no, because one of which, What if that's the one, the only one I've got?

So let me just try. How do you know the clue was going to be for the only one you've got? I'm just saying. Catherine's such a bitch. And also remember the lives I don't see, because I'm, I listen. I'm not a patron. I'm not a patron. Oh, fuck.

Oh, my God. It's so tricky, isn't it? Okay, that is 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4. Three, two, and one. Okay, I got one. Kirstie Weaver. Oh my God, I literally just wrote Kirstie Weeb back down. A half point each.

You started writing Brona, and then I was like, no, Brona came on it properly after that. Who were the others? The others were, we had pappies at Christmas. Fuck! We had Jess Foster Q at McCuntlet. Oh, my God. We've never had Jess in for a proper episode. We need to figure our shit out.

Jordan Gray for our first ever London show. Did Jordan never come on a proper episode either? Shit. Daniel Fox from Latitude. Oh my God. Oh my God. He was amazing, but that was tricky because you just swallowed a wasp. I had to swallow the wasp.

We had a lot going on. What is it? What is the last? And Rose Johnson came and did. No, Rose has been on. No, Rose hasn't done it. Roast is co-hosted with Camille. Oh, okay, then yes. Fair enough. Yeah, good point.

But we didn't get her, so that's fine. Wow. Well, either way, you only get a half point each. Fuck you guys, this quiz is. So hard. It's very difficult, but we'll move on. Shout out to Kirsty Webegg, though. Yeah, very memorable.

Was that our last live guest as well. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The most recent one, yeah. Yes. I thought we had Rose co-host, yeah, that was really fun. Yeah, we did. We had Rose, Catherine wasn't here. That was so good.

In old Venice, Catherine wasn't there for the Jess Foster Q one either. Yeah, but all the more reason I should know, because we got a replacement. Oh, damn it, it's hard, isn't it? Well done. That was really hard. Thank you. What's the next round?

The next round is execs and friends. Okay. So is this round number four? this round number four yes okay as we move into our penultimate round yes the scores are m please 17.15.5 for katherine 17.5 for katherine 16.5 for hello there's literally one point in it way boy two blabor wow okay right so this next round are questions from our executive producers and some friends of the podcast oh my god this is too cute so question one is from simon moors hi simon He says, whilst reading the Patreon benefits to listeners,

what did Helen suggest as a potential addition to the exec producer tier? This is in episode seven. Okay. I don't know if you will get this. This is very out there. Episode seven, what did Helen suggest as a Patreon executive? Nudes. I said we'll do it naked.

I will come and shit in your bed. Oh, my God. Jesus. And people signed up? Yes, yes. Oh, my God. Simon signed up, actually. Thank you so much, Simon.

Thanks, Simon. Larry shouldn't deliver Simon. Just to make it clear for anyone who is considering joining our Patreon, that has not been officially announced yet. No. It's not ever going to be. Never going to be. Then we have a voice note from dear friend, Pravanya Palais.

I love Pravania. What is my favourite egg incarnation? So Pravania obviously caused a lot of controversy by liking eggs more than chocolate. In fact, it's our most viral clip ever. but in subsequent chat we discussed our favourite egg incarnations what was Pravanya's number one egg

okay I think I think I know I hope okay I remember this clip going absolutely mental yeah are we ready yes okay oh I don't remember

three two one boiled poached Pravanya The answer is eggy bread Damn, that's too specific. She's just objectively correct.

That is the best. Fuck, she was fantastic. I seem to remember there was like, she was saying that she used to like come home from school and like pop in a boiled egg, like a boiled egg. She loves a boiled egg. She actually,

she was in my writer's room for my radio four series. And when I got everybody sweets at the end, I just got her some really fancy eggs. And she was so happy. She was so happy. I thought it'd be like, lull, and then she'd be a bit jealous of everybody else's candy kittens. But no, she was like, oh my God, eggs.

Each to their own, I guess, we say. I believe your exact quote was My Body, My Choice. My Body, Always My Body My Choice. That's one of my favorite things to say. Also, I feel like we've had two very heavy egg episodes. Remember when Shaw McLaughlin came on? Oh, that omelet episode was cool.

Crazy. But then I went to like a greasy spoon with him and some of the boys. And like, he was debating having an omelet. And I was like, oh my God, it's real. Like, it's real. Like, it wasn't a bit, you know? No, that man lost an omel. It was grim.

It had an omelot with bubble and squeak. Oh, on a hot day. on like a 30 degrees down. Oh no, that's not right. That's not right. We have another question from an executive from Madeline Quinn. Hi, Madeline Quinn. I hope your stand-up career is going very well.

This is an episode number question. We'll do closest wins. Which episode did Catherine trick Helen into thinking she'd passed her driving test? And for an extra point, which episode did she actually pass her test? Whoa. Okay. I know we were in. we were in the shipping container

when you did the tricks now I'm not letting you give her any more details because I remember what I okay I was no I will give you stairwell one ago I will give you stairwell

no no no okay no you have to remember that actually that wasn't that long ago you should be able to remember that answer good point I've got both of my answers okay five four three Two, one. 47 and 58. I've gone 20 and 50.

So on the, well actually Helen gets both points. Woo! It's episode 43 and then this was surprising for me. Episode 80. Yeah, I got the difference right basically. Yeah. You took your sweet-ass time. To do two different tests.

Yeah, because you know why? Because it was during COVID and you couldn't get another test. It took months to get another test. Can I tell you how I knew the first? date was around that yeah because I minused it from the stairwell story because that was the year after because I when you said you had news I thought that I was being invited to Australia for the first time but I wasn't you thought I somehow knew before you're yeah like you'd been told like a secret because like it only doesn't know like you have to be invited to do the Australian fringes and I've

wanted to go since like 2017 and I never got asked until last year and I thought maybe Catherine was going to tell me I've been in fight. That was like, at the Edinburgh Fringe this year, on the day I got nominated, the woman who played the love interest in the Truman show was in my show. And I knew we were waiting to find out. Truman Show. And I was like, is this how you find out?

Do they send a cast member of the Truman show? I could not fucking believe it. Okay, this is the equivalent of when I had Graham Norton and you were super jealous. I want the Truman Show lady in mine. It was, she smelled so. Yeah, I bet she did. She's flound. Was it Laura Linney?

Natasha McAlone. I know. She's so beautiful. She hasn't aged a single day. And she was so nice about my show and she put money in my book. I liked her. That's so sweet.

Also so creepy. To be like, is this what's happening? I know. I was like, hello? This must be about me. She must get that all the time. Are we filming? If you showed up anywhere

after being in the Truman Show for years, it must have been people being like, yes. Yeah. Are we in it right now? No. Go on, Andrew. Our next question is from our first ever Trusty Hogg's guest.

Hello, it's me, Alison Spittle. I'm going to try and do it anonymously. Come on crime watchers, a bit like that. In episode 24 with Poppy Hillstead, the memory of which food stuff originated my empathetic gag reflex. I didn't listen! In episode 24 with Poppy Hillstead. No, I heard that. I just didn't listen to the episodes.

You also weren't that for this. this is a very this was in the best of episode as well we had some clips of it yeah you should you should know this Catherine I think I'm about to even the playing field fuck am I winning already

are you ready I've written soup milk milk yeah Catherine you actually I'm Tarrant on TV oh I gave her the answer and I get I put A and then the milk and she was on a show called Tarrant on TV

yeah and she was on a show called Tarrant on TV and she went is it a milk tarot on TV and then she realized also I feel like I'm going to take the point because like fuck Catherine but also I very specifically remember saying I think this is like one of the first episodes that one of us wasn't there for yeah and I think you said you wanted to listen and I remember saying like I don't think you should yeah because it was disgusting it was like very gaggy I think I pissed a little bit wait a second this is going back like two and a half years ago You were cheating on the quiz, two and a half a year ago. We said no cheating. I'm taking the point, but I want to say, I think I was like, Catherine, I don't think you should. Saboteur. You should know what happened.

Jacques. Because I definitely had your own come out as well during the record. Ew. It was a bad day. At least you had the foresight to split your legs. Always. These next voice notes are from Snell Patel. The first one is a mistaken voice note, but I'm going to play it anyway.

So we knew it was the 150th, even though he was being a shit this morning. Yeah. He's a good actor. It's good. Which famous are unbelievable. Why did he send it? Because he's 43. He doesn't know what he seems work, Catherine.

Give him a break. Oh, bless him. Oh, Andrew dropped his notebook. He was pretending that he'd written the questions to him. That's so funny. The whole time he said, did you not know? He said when you went to the toilet, it was like, oh, I'm going to hold my notebook up because I didn't get a chance to make note cards.

So I was like, you don't have to. And he was like, no, no. He's been pretending. to read from it. The questions are just on your phone? Yeah. Isn't that so cute? You're so cute.

You're only a... No, that's possessive. Come on. You think it's cute. I want to say more, but I don't want to lose points. Go on. Oh, I really haven't abused my power enough

for this episode. I agree. Okay, this is from our dear friend, Snoopetow. Unbelievable. Which famous athlete did I have on display in our flat as two contrasting Okay, obviously I know that one. That's not fair.

Which famous athlete? Does Neil Patel have on the wall? We have an answer? Mohamed Ali. Mike Tyson. Answer. Mike Tyson, one ear biting and one feeding pigeons. It's called the duality of man and I fucking hate them.

Good God. And whatever you're picturing in your head, dear listener, when you picture these two, double the size. Wow. to double the same. I'm so far behind on point now. Well, I think you might get this one. This actually,

Olga Koch did send me a voice note, but one of us has accidentally deleted it. Oh, okay. I will just have to read her question out loud. Do her accent. I'm not going to do that. Oh. flavors including peanut collada, crunchin-arch, unicorn, and chalk mint mac mint face.

It is visible in this room, I will say. Don't, Andrew. Sorry. What? Which, frozen, international snack. Three. How is it? Visible in this room.

Two. One. Go on. What have you got? Golden Gay Time. It's on Helen's ankle. I fucking hate it. I even dug it away off.

That's so obvious to do. I thought that would be getable because it's Olga asking the question as well. Yeah, I thought I was really gettable actually. And also they are the most incredible. I don't like them. Yeah, I bought Catherine one when I was, I came to your hotel. Like, I think like two days after I landed in Melbourne. And I brought you an Ellen one each because I was like, oh my God, she has to have one.

Ellen was absolutely enchanted. She loved it. You could not have given less of a fuck. It's just not for me. I just don't like that crumbly bit on the outside. Yeah, the lovely biscuits they put around the. ice cream it's horrible yeah well i just like messina exists in australia do you know when you could be eating that instead i love it i gave one to laura roxel for her first time she lost her mind georgie's going on a

messina tasting menu when she's in australia do you know you could do that ugh an ice cream tasting menu yeah but there's like savory courses but they all have ice cream with them that's pretty cool fuck yummy right i was looking at me like what is it 2015 I believe I believe that does pull Helen into the lead 5 miles The score now is

It's 21 11. Did you get no questions right there round? 17 and a half to Catherine There is indeed a prize For all this quiz

Tomfoolery It is not a no state's prize It is a 20 pound gift voucher poor cow shed What? Are you serious? Are you serious?

Serious Did you buy that? Yeah Andrew's too cute Wait, did you buy that Or did hogs buy that? No comment We bought that

Andrew That's pretty good I love that I love that too It's basically like 6 quid out of each person's pocket Oh my God It's so

Andrew you did a prize And cow shed Give out Oh my god On a quiz That I'm definitely gonna win Oh yeah Fuck you man

Back in power power power power oh my god it's okay keep going keep going oh i'm jealous what can you buy oh you can buy some really lovely i don't know i've never been in couch yeah because i bought you a voucher and we were meant to meet up i was literally just thinking that when he said it i was like we need to use that we you probably run out of date on it no because it was birthday this year wasn't it even more just oh i have to beat her come on let's go let's go we've got a facial Catherine you never used it fuck what a waste No, because we did have a booked in. Why did I cancel?

You didn't realize you planned something or something? I'm the worst. Sometimes you can be a bit harsh, man. I think if you win the voucher, we should just give it to Catherine. Sorry, Kathleen. That makes sense. If you win, I should get the voucher. Oh, no, Kauffin.

And if I win, you can have it. Oh, Katham, what do we do? I quote, cows, shall they say, I'm sorry, I'm only four. Can I please have my facial? Okay, back to the Queen's. What round are we on? This is our final round. Round six.

It is a music round. Is this in the extras or no? This is the end of the normal episode. Okay, great. So this is our final run in the normal episode. We have two rounds in the extras so you can go and support us Patreon.com for slash trusty hogs.

There's lots of lovely benefits including two bonus quiz rounds for this week's extras. Whoa. So our first quote, I'm afraid it is a song that you weren't there for, Catherine. I do feel bad for this.

I'm sorry. Oh this is really coming up Helen today This is so unfair This genuinely is probably the most unfair question of the entire They don't ask this No, ask it, ask it You shouldn't have been sick What was the name of Harriet Kemsley's

Drama School Audition Song? Oh, come on Harriet gave us a beautiful rendition of this song What was the name of it? How would I know? This isn't from when Harriet came on like a month ago This is from when Harriet came on like Guest toasted yet

Oh my God. During the World Cup. No. What was her drama school audition song? Okay. Kathy's got an answer. Okay, it's going to be something absolutely mental because it's her. I'm going to say, okay.

Two, one. Okay, although that was very unfair, I'm pretty confident Helen hasn't got it, so I feel better. Okay, I just guessed. My Fair Lady. I put Lily Allen's smile. Both of those would make a lot more sense, but actually it was a nonsense song called The Merry Cobbler. Do we have a little listen? I was like, I'm a really bad singer, and I don't know how to hold a tune.

And so I got, like, everyone had, like, I had this teacher. She was like, just take you back to the basics. Yeah. So she taught me this song called The Merry Cobbler. And then... What's the Mary? Okay. Could you give a surrendition? Oh, God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I think she's starting to cry. Are you hyperventilating? Dude, like, I had, like, actions and stuff as well. It's like... Pff! Can you imagine that I went places and I actually did this? I can see you doing it errata.

I cobble, I cobble, please try it again. It's difficult with this background of it. It's really hard because that's really going for sweet Caroline at the moment on the streets of London. I cobble, cobble. I'm cobbling a shoe right now if anyone was wondering. And then he goes like,

Tra-Loddy. I can't believe she didn't get a drama school. She got it. How did I get that? The merry cobbler. And also, yeah, there was like a party going on. It was the World Cup. Yeah.

So they were singing Sweet Carolina. It was permeating the shipping container. Oh, yeah. She looks like she's having a panic attack. How did she have so many listeners when we had such bad quality? I know. Thank you so much. Thank you.

I'm thrilled to have you here on episode 150. Question two. Which Irish Hogg's guest has had their stripper song of choice be Tough Love, Pony Jump. Do we have the song? Yes. So which Irish Hog's guest had this as their stripper song of choice? No pony, let's do it. Ride in my pony.

Okay. So there is a jump on it by Tough Love, Pony Jump on it. Who was stripping to that song? be. Correct. Do I get an extra point because I got it first? No. We'd have to go back to leave. Without without the because Catherine needed an auditory aid, whereas I didn't need that.

Ellen, we could have gone back to loads of the questions I got first. I didn't need auditory aids for. Like that's shitting on the landing hand one. I knew. Question three, another Irish guest. David O'Doherty, his dad was the composer of which public safety message music. I know. He composed the song for an important Irish public safety campaign

For what cause I know it, I know it, I know it Okay, five, four, please reveal King of the road safety Correct, you both are correct He was crossing the road Remember, look for a safe place Don't hurry, stop and wait

Look all around and listen Before you cross the road remember I love I love dancing like I know it like it doesn't we had a

slightly different one but I love it it's just a banger we go to a recent guest Cindy V but this is from her first appearance oh shit

please complete the song of please keep the please complete the titular name from Cindy V's favorite song she's the woman

of the year I know she's the woman of the year who is the woman of the year according to Sindhu V's favourite song five

oh I have no idea okay Helen Minnie Mouse She's her woman of the year Minnie Mouse She's the woman of the year Minnie Mouse And the woman with the year

Sid I remember like I'd be like How have I not heard this? It's a banger but like yeah But you can see how the Disney stuff would stay with you in a way that you'd have like left my body at this point. You were definitely this associating in the clip, I might say. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Next question. At the second... I think I'm doing some somatic therapy to get back in my body. Anyone done it? No, but the movement? Yeah, the breathing one. Yeah. Anyone done it? I have done a bit of that. I find it quite challenging. Apparently, it's quite good if you've got like physical trauma, but I've never done it.

Anyway, question number five. I would genuinely love to discuss that with you after this time. No, no, I didn't want to talk about it in any definitely just why I brought it up in the quiz. Go on it. Question number five. I would discuss it at a time when you were ready to discuss it then.

I absolutely haven't. Go on. This is a question suggested by our executive Anthony Conway. Hello, Anthony Conway. At the second Gigless Live, this is our first at the Bill Murray, which song did Helen loudly serenade the audience with

as they were leaving? So we have to audition at Trust York's Lives and before that, Gigless Lives, where Helen will sing out the audience with karaoke. This was the first ever Helen Bauer karaoke. What song did she choose? Oh my God, I'm trying to think what my go-to was then? What year was this?

2020, 2021, the winter of 2021. We just landed the Bill Murray for a residency of Gigless Live. And you sang us out with which song? Five, four, three, two, and all one. Celine Dion is still coming back to me now. Oh, I didn't get to finish, Mariah Carey. You are along the right lines, but it is Whitney Houston. Fuck.

Greatest love of all. Greatest love of all. Damn it. It's supposed to say for me. Do, do. I just did this in karaoke and Sydney. Of course you did. That's beautiful.

I believe the children are a future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they deserve. You should Google the Whitney version. It's beautiful, which is hard to tell, I know. Give them. Stop. And if you want to experience that live, come see us on tour.

It's actually worse a cappella, you swear. It is, it is, I do very well when I'm singing over someone else singing. Yeah. Our lives are very fun. We have three dates left this year, Dublin, London and Manchester. All selling very quickly, yeah. Fucking else. Woohoo!

Trustjogs.com forward slash tour. Right, our next question. Which unlikely musical duet was the craziest moment of the moment of the noughties, which unlikely musical duet. Oh, this is the same section. It's still a music round. Two artists duetting together in the noughties. It was the craziest moment

of the noughties. Although actually a few comments when we clicked this up pointed out was actually 2010. Oh, fuck off. Well, that's the craziest moment of the noughties. I'm ready. I'm ready. I also feel like I've won

already. Yeah, I think you have this in the bag. I have, have a note. Yeah. Have I? Yeah, I've won. I know. It's been a real, like, hero's journey. Mm.

Yeah, I'm just into heroes journeys at the moment. Okay. I've got Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart. I've got Matt Cardle and Rihanna. It was Matt Cardle and Rihanna. That makes way more sense, but I think mine's funny. It is funny. A point for Catherine.

Woo! I'm fucking joke for banter she gets the point. Do you have any questions about the naughties, Andrew? because we'd be happy to answer them do you genuinely none that spring to mind what was your what was the most crazy thing

about the naughty and it was fucking mental that and the war on terror okay there's there's actually five points available in this last question so you might be able to pull back here

doubt it given I didn't get the last one which I should know because I remember you saying that and me going ha ha ha no weirdly you did get a point for it katherine even though wasn't right oh but mine was so funny our final question i would like you to please to sing the trusty hogs theme tune one line at a time so it i'll go alternate who wants to katherine you're behind you can either start or i'll start please okay through the fog that's one point step forth the trusty hogs one point problem I'll give you it yes one point and then they'll solve them I'll also give you that yes oh my god Catherine and then they'll solve them and if not that's your

problem no that's not the line I'm afraid or maybe they won't and that's your problem they'll have guests and Andrew White on the tech no it's one by one for points yeah but you've already lost no Helen you broke the game

and Andrew White on the tech you know and Andrew White on the tech a point for Catherine yeah it's Helen and Catherine oh yeah this was definitely worth it guys it's him Catherine Mary Joseph Nope

As the trusty hogs Trust those trusty hogs Or maybe not No way She does not get a single point for joining her I think five points to Helen Three Three to Catherine

Five yes Okay Catherine got three points Can I say I should get three points Because I'm going off a memory of that song From when I heard it's the only time Which is when you played me songs That were sent to us as options

from huge Davies in the year 2021 of Our Lord and I think I did pretty well and I think it's weird that you know your own theme song I also will give that to Catherine because I think I heard it a lot more because that was one of my jobs

that the setting up a trusty hogs was the theme tune with huge also you listen to the episodes I only listen to the episodes I'm not on I do feel bad because I know many of my actual close friends know every single word to that song

I know how many times you'll pluck it in a week, maybe in a day that I have to listen by. M is like shaking with rage. Do you know, I am, I may have told you this before I'm listening to all my podcasts on two times speed. You're crazy, Janzee. And I played the Huge Davis theme to them. I'm like, gosh, really slow.

What a dirge. It's so slow because I'm used to hearing it like, oh, that hard, that drithy hard. Thank you, huge. Thank you, huge. I'm glad we did that. I'm glad we did that. Slime Country.

Well. You just podcast. It's good. Yeah, that's nice, but mainly the song is great. That is the end of the quiz. I did have a tie break ready, but we'll leave it in for the extras, maybe. Do we even need it? I want that.

Yeah, I don't think we do need it because, um, what are the scores? 24 and a half to Catherine, a very respectable score. It's not bad, my dream age. And Helen Bauer has got 30 and a half. Well done, Helen. Well done, Helen. I am honestly, so, I thought, especially the first two questions, And just generally, vibes wise,

I thought I would lose by such a bigger margin. I'm so, I'm thrilled. You were very worried about it, but you have done amazing. I think you remember a lot more of the episodes than you realize. I guess there's some stuff in there that, like, you just can't get rid of. Like, even though I don't want to remember that person shitting

when they had sex with that person, or when, like, you pissing yourself on a stairwell, I guess you just like, that just like burns in there, you know? Whoa. Like the date of the sinking of the Titanic. 1912, 14th of April. There we go. I'll never forget that.

Queen Victoria Elizabeth the first I don't know That was a great answer Oh Alan's going to be so disappointing That was so good you guys Thank you so much for organising all of that Guys bravo to Emma and Andrew

The heroes of trusty hogs in every way We hope you had a good time Let us know your scores on the comments on the videos And Helen will see them All the best If anyone gets 100% of the answers right You're two in That's, yeah, that's perverse.

You've got that surely. If you get 100%, I'm going to say, get outside, touch some grass, baby girl. Or become like a quiz master. Or you have an unbelievable memory. Maybe you should be putting it to better use. Imagine if we're a mastermind category. That's exactly what I was just thinking. If you do get 100%,

then you should apply. You have to enter mastermind and have your specialist subject be the podcast trusty heart. Imagine Clive Myrie saying things like on which episode did her co-host Helen Piss her self-samously in a stairwell in Australia. How many holes does Helen Bauer believe she has around her genitals? Oh, we have an email about that, actually. I can't take another email about the genitals. That will do for episode 150. Thank you everybody.

Thank you. Oliver Jago, Anthony Conway, Neil Redmond, Madeline, Quinn, Grace, O'Reilly and Lily. Thank you all so much. And thank you to our producers. I will be doing this all in one breath. And Northern accent. Jesus.

El, Richard Bold, Harold Van Dyke, Tim and Dom, David Walker, Rachel R. Sady Cash, for Clare, Owen Jones, Jess and Nick, Sarah, Molly, Ria, Fink, Cordelia, Rachel Page, Helen Aitina, Lindsay Graham, Marsh, Amy O'Reardon, Abby Ward, Matt Sims, Luke, Matt Sims, Luke, Luke, Stateness, Liz Ford, Tass, Anthony, Clough, Becky Fox, Michael, Sophie, Sophie,

scary souls Charlie A. KC. Jam Rainbow, Nathan Smith Amanda McCall, Tamson Smith Harding, Hannah J. Isra Perrigan. Bryn. Two breaths, but still not bad. Pretty fucking good, actually. I actually, you didn't drop the accent. Thank you so much.

I really, a lot of respect for that, actually. Huge.