Trusty Hogs - Ep164. JIN HAO LI / Costa, Culture & Citalopram

Episode Date: December 12, 2024

A lovely guest episode with the brilliant Edinburgh Fringe best newcomer nominee, Jin Hao Li! Jin is a brilliant calming presence which is very fun to see play out against Helen's energy...FOLLOW JIN: @Jin.Hao.LiNEW MERCH: trustyhogs.com/merchLEICESTER (15/2): Live Show TicketsThank you so much for listening!Support us at www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)All links: https://audioalways.lnk.to/trustyhogsSNThank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Annie Tonner / Stefanie Catracchia / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Neil Redmond / Madeline Quinne / Sadie CashmorePRODUCERS: Elle / Richard Bald / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Claire Owen-Jones / Jess & Nick / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate / Liz Fort / Taz / Anthony / Klo / Becky Fox / Dean Michael / Sophie Chivers / Carey Seuthe / Charley A / KC / Jam Rainbird / Tamsyne Smith-Harding / Hannah J / Ezra Peregrine / Bryn / Laura Pollock / Leah Overend / Steven ChickenWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Andrew, M, we are now about to do our merch promo. It's ethical, it's size inclusive, it's lesbian coded, it's freaking gorgeous, it's a merch drop, everybody. We've got T-shirts, we've got beanies, we've got baseball cups and we've got a tote. Beep, beep, merch, merch, murch, motherfuckers, let's go! You can get it all now at trusty hogs.com forward slash merch, and please, can you do us a massive favor? We want to see you guys wearing it. We really hope you really love it. Also, we talk pictures of us in it, so you can take pictures of you, and you.

Please, we want to share them. We want to see a little cuties. Can you tag us on Instagram, please? We worked so hard on it. Guys, you don't know how long I had to find Helen to make sure everything wasn't with pigs. And she's not thrilled about it. It's so weird that like the two I've bought, only one of them has a pig. After all that.

After all that. And I was like, this is the one I won. I want a full cartoon pig on everything. I'm proudest of the fact that the T.H. In thriving made it on. I cannot believe that no one spotted that apart from you. I'm so proud of it. Guys, we did our best.

We really thought about it. Trustyhogs.com forward slash match. Hello and welcome to episode 164. 164 episodes of Trusty Hogg. It's a magical number. I'll bet you in some culture it is. So let's say it. Why not?

Welcome, this is a podcast about our perfect lives. I'm Catherine Beauxhart. She's Helen Bell. Hello. Hello. And we are going to answer our lovely listeners problems momentarily. If we remember. If we remember.

Definitely if we get round to it. We have every intention of it. No one can say we're. didn't drive. Through the fog, step forth the trusty hogs. Yeah, you're gonna give them your problems and they will solve them

or maybe they won't and that's your problem. They'll have guests and Andrew White on the tech. Oh, it's Helen and Catherine as the trusty hogs. Trust the trusty hogs on

maybe not. Hi. Hi. How are you? Doing so good. I have a bone to pick with you. Don't do this because we just had a lovely coffee together. And you didn't say a single thing about a bone. If anything, you were enamored by me, the entire coffee.

I was very charmed, but that's because you were talking about dying and you know how I love to talk about death because I'm Irish. But speaking of Irish yesterday, you spent the day with a different Irish woman and my girlfriend. I know. I had a Catherine Bohart Day minus Catherine Bohart. The audacity of it No, it does sound really fun Ellen had such a nice time

You went to see Paddington 3 It was the most dreamy day of all time I cannot explain So basically I've had a cold I went to Vienna Yes We'll talk about that later We'll get to that

We'll get to it later I was like that's a huge We can segue to Vienna because we're never coming back here We're never getting back there But like originally this is like a month ago We were like Let's all go see Paddington 3

and Moana 2 On Sunday the 8th of December everyone was up for it You dropped out within 24 Catherine Is that what happened It is I was at your house Yes you were at my house

shouting in the front door While you smoked That we were all coming And we were bad friends And we were leaving you With a bad situation If we didn't And that you were to be

We were all coming And then when we were like Oh you were like Poor Helen Poor Mary You're a liar You're a liar And then I was like

Maybe I could do one of those films And then within 24 hours I was like I'm not gonna be able to do that you did drop out first that is not what happened thank you very much we had you had been saying sorry sorry I'm being brave here you had been saying that you wanted to do more hangout yeah outside of work and stuff and I was like here's a great but not with your sister who wants to murder me with you you have to find a way to get along with her I'm I'm not the obstacle she has a learning difference

she knows exactly how she's going to kill me yeah because she loves you and she has a method for your murder. How was that not a sign of love? You're right, that's on me. Well, how about you take a chill pill like she suggested? Yeah, to be fair, that's on me. But no, the actual issue, the blockade in this case was not her personality, but rather the movie choices.

Didn't want to see either. What a perfect winter afternoon. Moana 2 and Paddington 3. Didn't love Moana 1 and haven't seen any of the Paddington. So it was never going to be for me, do you know what I mean? Yeah. But that's still disappointing. So you dropped out.

really early. Ellen and Charlie still technically in. Charlie had a wedding. Yeah and bless her, she's got so many bees in her brain that sometimes she forgets that she has things on. But she always would have loved that Sunday. Like that would have been her ideal scenario,

but alas. But in my head, we'd all committed. This is the thing. You are so like Ellen, which is like... I've committed. You're both like, well, we said the thing.

So we didn't think there would be any change and we don't like change. any change is shocking even though it's like people be changing things so i'd already book tickets for me and my sister for like just the start of the day paddington three 1230 yeah in deepest darkest peckham not deepest darkest peckhamplex the cinema famous for five pound 99 tickets is it famous for that yes it's a but it used to be five pounds and now it's five ninety nine i was so impressed ellen went because traveling from east london and that's storm that's me that's love we had such bad storms this weekend. My sister couldn't come in the end because all of her trains were down. So then she

couldn't come. Was she furious? She wasn't so much furious because I immediately rebuttled it with being like, oh, if you're going to go stay at dads. Yeah. And he's down in like near Brighton. I was like, how about for my gig in Brighton next Friday? So this Friday, I'm getting in Brighton at the forge. Nice. I'll say, I'll come down early and we'll watch Moana two then. But I have to see Paddington 3 on Sunday because I've already got tickets. And that'd be crazy not to get out of bed to use them. Yeah. Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I go to Paddington 3. I need a replacement because Ellen at this point wasn't sure she'd be able to make it because she's got a cough, right? Oh yeah, she has this fucking endless. She's on antibiotics now. Yep, she said she had it for, honestly

six weeks. It's awful. Isn't it really, really bad? Yeah, you can't pretend that kind of cough. It's like gutterol. It comes from like her, the deep of the depth of the hell for her because I know that cough, the one that's like itchy and like tick. Do you remember when I had it when we went to go see fan girls, the musical, and I sort of like choked on air.

And there was a moment during the play where I just sort of like, was like, and you know when you can't quite, you can't breathe without coughing so you're trying not to breathe.

And then Catherine was like, you're okay, you're okay, you're okay. I was like, you're just gonna have to cough my guy. But we were sitting next like the artistic director of the entire theater

and I was like, I can't cough during the show night. He was a fan of hog. He was a really sweet man. We were like, sorry, are we much more influential on artistic than we, and I get,

well, no, you were like, we're so impressive. I was like, men, listen to our podcast. I know, and I was like, thank you so much. We love the theatre. It was horrible. Yeah, not your finest.

So I replaced Marianne slash you with Alison Spettel. Gorgeous. Which is a great shout. So fair. An upgrade, if anything. It was gorgeous. Yeah. She's just got a better sense of humor.

And then Ellen arrived and it was the three of us. And like, I mean, it was about a quarterful of the cinema with just little tots, like, sweet little tots like tots age as far as like a lot of people had toilet trips i had a toilet trip alison had a toilet trip like everyone was toilet tripping the whole way through it a lot of really cute big reactions from the baby it's like oh oh no it was so pure and paddington three because everyone i'm sure you've heard we're on the same algorithm everyone's like it's good but it's not as good as padding one and two it's good but it's not as good pannington one and two it's charming Ellen said it was really good

and she's so critical of films of course she cries at everything everything like she cries honestly it is impressive to get her to go to a film and not we but like she or indeed like so we were at the

pig hotel where we took my parents for their 40th and we were on the garden tour and the head gardener was saying that he had just had a child and they named the child after a tree that was in bloom, like it was making fruit at the time that he was born. They called it apple tree?

Rowan. Beautiful. Rowan tree. He says this. Honestly, in like the quickest most efficient way possible, no feeling whatsoever. Turn around, Ellen's crying. And you're like, there are six people on this tour and he just said his son's name and she's like, to think of a man having his son.

Like she is not a litmus for whether or not something's good, but she did love the film so that's fine. Paddington went home to Peru. Spoiler. It doesn't necessarily mean that's where his home is. Spoiler. Spoiler!

It's very sweet. That's very nice. It was such a chuck, because I hadn't been out the house for two days. That's so funny that you think that's long. I could happily go, it takes me four before I get like, oh, I should go outside.

Do you not feel a bit like a dog sometimes? Nope. No. No. Like sort of scratching at things a little bit. No. Nope. We're so different.

We really are. I'd happily not speak to anyone. The thing I'm most excited about for Christmas is that I intend for two weeks not to be on my phone. I can't wait. Don't expect to me to text, to call. I'm just going to be like, no, thank you. I'm off.

You're not going to talk to me at all. If I called you on Christmas Day, you'd answer. Because I also know you're going to text me on Christmas Eve. I know Christmas is a really hard time for you just to let you know you can call me any time. Yes. Well, I would, but you're doing well this year. I am thriving.

I did that before because I really felt like it was a tough all time for Helen and indeed the world. But I think you could do a Christmas this year and be all right. But yeah, I'll definitely text you. Yeah, we go. But my dream is not being on my phone for two weeks. Slay. But my dream is always like not seeing anyone for a month.

I know we're different. No, no, I kind of get it. Like I like a day by myself, but like two full days. I'm like, you know, like when you have one sweet and you want more. like if you have a chocolate you want like eight more I'm like that about days alone I have one alone and I'm like

oh to spend a solitary year like I just it just makes me want it more like I'm like every like yeah I have no interest in seeing people and you know ultimately yours is a healthier urge sure I think it's a health

I think it is at this time of year whereas we all know in case you're new here like I'm not getting SAD this year or depression. She's not getting depressed. Because I've manifested it. Okay. So then part of that is being like,

oh shit, I should go on like a little walkie. So yesterday I walked to the cinema. I went completely the wrong way. No. But I was on the phone with Rosie Jones for 45 minutes during the walk. Oh, Jesus. So I got so lost.

And I realized it was because I put into my city mapper, Costa. But Peckinplex is near a road called Costa Street. So ended up on this one random road, be like, why would there be a Costa here? But it cost a street. Because a road called Costa Street. And there's no Costa on Costa Street.

No, no. It's just like, lovely houses. Okay, fair enough. Very charmed, actually. Bet they cost a lot. What did you do things? You couldn't make it. Oh, God, do it again, do it again.

Bet they cost a lot. Thank you. Thank you. Women can make jokes. Women can make dad jokes and don't let anybody tell you that they can't. No, but you can tell I spend a lot of time alone. So, listen. you've been to Vienna

I wanted to hear about your Sunday oh my Sunday was nice I obviously Ellen left so I savored my three hours alone savored them got my little bits of work done it was very exciting loved every freaking second of it

and then I went to Georgie's house which is now like a thousand miles from me even though she just lives in West London but we used live on the same street so it's crazy to me that we have to cross a city to see each other and we watched the we often watch a sort of

her and her mom and I are in a text chain about bad Netflix Christmas movies because we once watched one called a New York Christmas Remind me A New York Christmas tale New York Christmas

Hang on, what was it called I'm going to it, I'm going to a chain We definitely had this saying We can't remember the name of the film last year Oh no really? If you go back 52 weeks from today You will find us having a new year Christmas wedding New York Christmas wedding

We said it last time as well But it's since been removed from Netflix So now I feel like no one's ever going to believe us that it actually existed. It was the craziest Christmas movie I have ever seen. The lesbians being married in the church that the priest

was Chris North, yikes, and he somehow breaks the rules of Christianity of Catholicism and marries them in the church. But one of them is haunted at the whole time by the ghost of her aborted child

who's played by a twink. It's honestly, and the whole thing shot on like a Nokia 33-10. It's crazy. it's the weirdest film I've ever seen but so we're always trying to top it but we watched

and single all the way may I recommend as one of the ones that we watched in trying to top it Michael Chey and Jennifer Coolidge and it's gorgeous gay boys coming home for Christmas but they're jazz friends or like one of them straight as well it's gorgeous

anyway all of which is to say that last night we watched the our little secret it's the new Lindsay Lohan yeah yeah yeah yeah movie. Wow. Did you watch Pretty Little Liars? First season and a half, I'd say. Okay, do you remember the man who played the, let's call a spade, spade, pedophile, the teacher who was dating

the student. Lily, what's your name? Is it, no, Lucy's, Lucy's character, Lucy Hale's character, is dating this teacher. Arria, Arria, is dating Mr. The teacher. What's his name? I can't remember that guy. Yeah, but everyone's like, that's a totally normal thing and you're like, well, that's insane. Yeah, even when her parents find out, they're like, well, she's graduated high school now, so I guess you should stay in a guy from college. Sorry, what? But the point of her character is her parents are liberal because she wears bohemian bag. That is too liberal. So, they, he and Lindsay Lohan have a relationship at the beginning. They have not just zero sexual chemistry. It

appears the two characters themselves have never known sex, right? So that's an important. Oh, is there an asexual story? No, apparently not. very modern that wouldn't that be honestly be so much more plausible so then the stakes of this film are they break up

and you're supposed to care whether or not they get back together and they get new partners and those partners transpire to be siblings so they meet again at this family Christmas that is not their family Christmas Christian Chenna with like evil mom

enchanted actually I've never hated her before she does a really good job of being loadsome in this film.

The woman who used to play Turk's girlfriend in Scrubs Lisa. It was her

name Lisa? Was her character names Lisa? Carla. Carla. She shows up

for a moment. Very exciting. A lot of the extra character like the sort of

like the parent characters are played by good actors and they're doing their

darnedest. But gosh. It's one of my favorite times of year is watching Catherine

try and remember actors names and what previous shows people have been in and what happened there is you actually gave up on yourself. Instead of doing this is a behind the scenes edit, sometimes Catherine is like

well I can't not remember again and we have to pause for her to Google or someone to check and what you just did there was give up and go good actors and I'm sure are wonderful and many things Lisa can we pause now and on air

can I just say honestly I cannot be the only one satelopram. Absolutely Absolutely scrambles my brain. I have lost all memory. Like, I was bad at like recall before I was on antidepressants. Now I am

dog shit. And I'm not laughing at your side effects, but you do have some funny side effects. It's so funny. It's constantly me being like, you know, the one with the film, with the thing, with the thing. And people are like, there's no words in there for clues. Like, you've got to give us a hint. Where are you trying to get to?

Like, honestly, the only person who can sweetly do it is, oh, is Ellen. because sometimes I'll be like the bag with the tree and she'll be like sorry what what about a hat and then she'll be like do you want water and I'm like yeah

I don't know Was that the bag with the tree gobbledygook especially in the morning so bad but thank goodness also my hands don't work because I told you I was starting to get this did yeah

early arthritis thing and so my hands just don't work in the morning and increasingly they don't work till like about three but they are especially bad in the cold and she will just like put my coffee in my hand even though I'll be like morning shorts

and she'll be like I think you've been coffee it's so bad don't talk to me before I've had my coffee my satelopram and my hands are working it's a rough morning for lesbian because fingers aren't working on it

the worst girl boss ever but first shorts I mean water I mean coffee I mean oh god but yes so it is we watched this last night And it's terrible, but obviously worth the watch.

Charmed, though. Charmed as hell. Then we watched the Sabrina Carpenter special. With Chaparone? No. Oh, my God. Okay. So I've not really watched one of those Christmas specials before.

I gather they're sort of American go-to. But I imagine they're not all as funny as that or as camp as that. It was, it got, like, it had an SNL vibe. It was really fun. It was silly and stupid and I think I would prefer it if I was drunk but it was fun I liked it I didn't hate it

I wasn't mad at it I thought she was funny and I was charmed Sabrina Coppenter is so funny And Meg Stolter shows up in it And is a real dream And the guy who plays one of the hobbits Sam Wise Ganges Yeah yeah yeah

I don't know his actor's name Sean something Sean Aston Sean Aston And he plays Three women that was I got there all over myself He plays that, he plays, I said Sean Ashton, you said Sean, I said Sean Ashton.

I think Em's, yeah. No, I got there myself. Oh, she's cured. Maybe just thank Em quickly for helping out. Okay. Women in male spaces. What's good is Em's not really on mic, so we now sound crazy, Em. Like, it's like Catherine's got it.

Well, name the other, name the other hobbit. and he played Santa Claus. It's a real treat. Can I say one thing? You may say so many things and also you've never asked before he said this must be able to do. No, just like in general

and I know this is a side effect of medication and with all respect for that, you don't have to tell us who played everyone. I said Paddington in Peru. I didn't feel the need to list any of the characters or the actors' names. I feel like you put an unnecessary

pressure on yourself. I say this on behalf of myself and the listener at home. If you are curious, you're already on your phone. You're listening to a podcast. Have a Google. But why wouldn't they want to listen to me

that have happened and remember somebody who may not have been in it and then gaslight M over whether or not she helped me get you. But your eyes are rolling around in your head trying to remember. I can see you getting stressed. Please don't make me laugh because yesterday I did this.

So comedy podcast! No, because yesterday I did a workout and I have, I realized I have not worked out anything that has to do with my like um body my central like my what's the word core central body wow um my core in so long because i did this you know when you're like i took a leaf out of the hell at helen book of things where you're like okay i actually don't want to do a massive i didn't want to go outside i didn't want to do a massive workout but i was like i will do a no equipment youtube video i was like i can do 20 minutes so i put it

Joe? I actually put in a, I just put in no equipment, home workout, full body. And then I picked the most normal looking woman. Yes, yeah, yeah. Oh my God. It was the single hardest workout. Four beginners, no jumping. I have ever done in my fucking life. But like, I would say, yeah, I wouldn't have thought that I was really a beginner. Like I, I'm like, I, you know, I usually run twice a week. I do some other form of whites or yoga twice a week. Like I was like, I can do, I was in bits. And now when you've made me laugh just then, I was like, I actually can't because I'm also on the first day of my period.

And everything from my like tits to my thighs just hurt. So that's where I'm at. Does everyone want to, is that kind of thing people want to listen to? Yeah, and for anyone listening who is curious about period anatomy, that is exactly where it hurts from, tits all the way down to thighs. So do you think. Yeah, 100%. It's like a headache in your crotch.

It's a nightmare. That's exactly it. But yeah, but my abs, I guess, or where they're supposed to be really hurt today. Sometimes I get up from the sofa without using my hands

and that's what me and Sineal say engage your core and we have to stand up from the sofa. That was one of the exercises except this, get this,

it was full sit up to standing from the floor. No hands back down to full sit up no hand. I was like sorry. We're trying that

in the extras. Write that down. I'm not joking. It's so difficult. What is particularly difficult is to not widen your feet because she did it without widening her stance. So like the urge to widen your feet so that you can get yourself

up is so tempting. She just did it all like feet together and I was like sorry. Where is this woman's centre of gravity? I don't understand. Anyway, that was my day yesterday. You're an Irish woman with a dumper. You're not an acrobat. Do you know what I mean? What the fuck? Yeah, crazy. That's it. We're trying that though. It's crazy. I can do the sofa if I think about it for two minutes beforehand and have a really good rock back in the Christians. I know what you mean. Yeah, so far I am I can If it's not too deep, I can do. Ours is very deep. It's a low down sofa as well.

And far back. There's a lot of danger towards it. So we've got that low coffee table. Yeah. And then the TV. Yeah. And you must not fall head first into TV. No, that's, that's, yeah, that's sort of goes about saying, I guess.

It's good to see we're both thriving. Yeah. I had a big walk. You know, you did the exercise video. Yeah. I did a grow with Joe on Saturday morning when I had a cold. How was that? I gave up halfway three.

But it was a really good. start you had a cold come on that's outrageous i know i was trying to like shift it but i did i did a good cold couple of days so i went to oh my god i went to vienna yeah what is wrong with me can i just say by the way i actually really don't like the myth that you should sort of exercise through like you should exercise through illness or colds i think generally speaking exercise lowers your immune system does it and it's okay like it's like harder on your immune system so it's okay to give yourself a little bit of rest when you're sick I think I just felt a bit like walk sure but like do you know when your body I do you never know if it's like if your body's got a cold so everything aches a little bit or whether it's because I've been lying down too long that's what I'm saying like walk by all means go for a walk yeah yeah but I think like high intensity work at like no oh Catherine I'm typing in grow with Joe 20 minute walk with me total beginners no jumping no jumping yeah okay fine I hear you 10 minutes and I went all good time for the moment time for the more

and family. That's enough gross. Thank you, Joe. You went to Vienna. I went to Vienna. Quick whistle stop tour. Was there for three days. Gang, good question.

Me, Sunil Patel, Nick Ellaray, Matt Ewan's, Kate Palmer. The reason I asked that is because the photos on Instagram would very easily lead a person to believe that you're on a romantic

weekend away with Sunil Patel, which I was obviously excited about and then I saw the extras and I was like, I mean, you're their friends. Why would I be a romantic weekend away with Sunil Patel? Because maybe you usually.

just like this is it we're going to fall in love this is it us and Vienna together this is it here we go loads of beautiful art galleries where did you stay in Prata which is where the little theme park is it was like out of town and it was a motel one

which is like premier in so we weren't at the city centre because it's like it's so expensive this time of year so we were like a little bit out but we all got like metro cards and we did the big historicist museum.

Sorry, what should you call me? The Kunst historicist. Sorry, who are you talking? Kinst! How dare you. Kuntz. What? That was a bit too gutter.

Is he this guy? No, that's Munch, Edvard Munch, and that is in Oslo at the Munch Gallery, which I've also been to. I love my art, so shoot me. There's a Munch gallery and a Kuntz.

Kuntz. And we went to... And who, what does he do? In the... It's just a big art gallery. Okay, it's not an artist. Art History Museum. It's what?

They've got the... It's the German word for art. Yeah, kunst is the German word. You didn't want to open with that? I feel like people know that. Kunst. You feel like that because you speak German. I feel like we've heard it, no?

Kunst. I feel like you guys who speak German have heard it. I went to an art gallery. It was called the Kunst Historishers Museum. Fabulous, thank you. Which people would know as the art history museum. Thank you for explaining. It had the largest collection of Brugels in the world who was a painter.

I didn't know of them before. Wasn't that fuss. Okay. Went to another... What kind of stuff does Brugles do? Oh, just like a Brugel. Brugel? The largest collection of Brugles in the world.

Snail bought a Brugle tote bag. Right, but what's Bruegel's vibe? Just like scenes of like people. Fine, boring. And there's one that's really famous of a tower. But it's like, it's okay. Like, you know, it's like when you see like Picasso's, is it Picasso did the Gernica? Or like, it's like that famous painting about a war and it's just black and white.

And it's like, come on that flight. You know what I mean? Right, okay. Make enough. We have colour TVs now. Yeah, exactly. I get it. But we saw like all the climped ones

at Schloss Belvedere, went to Shlis Belvedere. So saw the kiss, the original kiss. Nice. Even I know them. I loved it. Got a fridge baggie of the kiss from Schloss Belvedere. As is tradition, I've had a print of the kiss in my rented shared accommodation for many a year. Don't mind if we do because we didn't want to have the chan-war.

So we went with this instead. Fair. Thank you. It's gorgeous. Yeah. And I was like, I was like, why do I love climp? so much because I was doing that thing where I was like I would be attracted to this even if it wasn't the famous one

because it's shiny and gold. It's a shiny and gold. Of course it is. Yeah. All I want is a bit of glitter. Yeah, of course. Because I don't think the National Portrait Gallery, Crip with Rung, has any glitter in it. I wouldn't know. If you're an artist watching this, you use glitter glue. Please. We'll be charmed. Yeah. I won't go

but hell and we'll tell me this charming. I was so good. I had a really Christmassy week. Yeah, like Vienna Christmas markets drank a lot of glue vine, got really messy one night. Did you? Yeah, I think that's why I got a cold. What does messy look like? Oh, when I booked us in before we went, like all five of us,

this like traditional Austrian restaurant, like a pub sort of thing. And we all just had just plates of schnitzel and sourcout and like all the crap. And it was so good. But I'd been hitting up the glue vine before it, mold wine. So I was a bit like,

and then straight after that, I was like, the evening could have gone two ways and I was like shots and I knew it I knew it was a bad show and just get messy messy messy ended up on the street eating a kebab like you say that like you wouldn't have done that shot like I'm sorry that's so funny to be like the wine made me have a cab yeah yeah so I was having a cab but we went to this place so like Kate's friend who lives in Vienna was with us and um she was like oh there's this is I think Sebastian strass or something that you did shots on a first impression no we'd met at the night before very briefly so it's fine it's fine

yeah and we were on the street there was like a place where they had like all the different night food like pizza sausage kebab and i was like oh shit i really want a cab everyone else was getting like pizza and like hot dogs and stuff like that but like my kebab thing was down the end I ordered it I got it and I got like one that was like open like in the hand like all the meat and all the garlic sauce no no extravagant right no and then there was a guy who was hassling around you all he ate that And I've been like, and that is my cue. Bye. Poor Helen.

There's this guy. No, only because I, that's all the things that make me like, oh. It's too much. It was this guy harassing like Kate and the guys, but they don't speak German. So I was like, oh, I should go over and like see what's happening. So I went over and like, oh, hi, how's it going, blah, blah, blah. And like, he was like doing that whole like, oh, for all medles, dish, lashen, leschen, leshan, leshan, lechen, lechen, en fact, do best off elab. What does it mean?

You should be smiling. Why don't women smile anymore? You're on holiday, cheer up. Okay. And I was like, oh God, I don't think he's like violent. I think he's just a bit mad. So I was doing that thing of being like, oh, she's actually had like a really bad day.

We've had really bad news today. And I was like saying all this and I was looking over and Kate was like laughing and stuff. And I was like, she's got a really serious illness. What did he say to this? No, he was just like, oh, yeah, oh, but we musten more friendlish sign.

Do you have to do have a shenan lesson. And he was like telling me I had a beautiful smile and stuff because I was like smiling like she's dying like all of that stuff and then he was sort of still half talking but walking away and we all had our food and I was like I just took the biggest forkful of me had it hanging out my mouth

and he clearly needed a final shot so he turned round he was like lose weight or like nim kilos and you know when you're like don't shout that when I'm eating a cab come on man any other time any other time it's still fucking rude but come on there was like rats on the street

and I had a kebab hanging out my mouth and I'd just been really cool speaking German and all my friends thought I looked awesome and stuff. And all the people working in the cab shop were like, she's a fucking G. And I was like, yeah, I'm a legend. I was like, I'm going to have a fork full of hot meat to celebrate. What a prick. He just said, lose right. I was like, no. So I finished my cab. Oh my God, that was such a feminist fucking move of you. That's feminism. I believe it is feminism. No, I agree on that. Now, shall we bring on our guest? Oh, my God, I'm so excited. It's a fucking man. But we can still be excited. I love him. It's the incredible.

Jim Howling! Welcome. How are you? Oh, this is the same energy as before recording. Yeah. So that's good. Yeah. Did you expect it to be anything?

Did you expect us to get serious? I expect it. I don't know. Maybe just like a, yeah, a new persona maybe. No, I think we have the same level of intensity on the podcast as I have on the tube. which is the last time we saw each other we were on the tube together after our gig It's lovely chat

You said you debated with my country's prime minister's son Yeah exactly that's right That is right And then I think I asked you like several very intense And quite personal probing questions And then it was my turn to get off the tube It was very fun I was like You timed it perfect

I did really didn't I I was like do you buy the boat on the tube Yeah I was like do you miss your mom got to go bye You did not No but pretty much She sounds like a remarkable woman She is, she is

She's my hero Well, she kind of raised me by herself And she She wanted to do to Canada at first So we're from like a small town In China And it's like you can't really be anything You know

You can't be anything big She wanted us to be big And then And then so then they went to Beijing To take the English test But then my father at the time Failed it by three points and then as they were walking outside the exam hall

she was like I'm leaving you and then and then I would watch this film I would watch this film go on grandma is really important it's played such a big role in my life it's taken me from my father

but I mean yeah and then because Canada failed she was like well the next best thing is like Singapore okay she brought me there and then so so when we first went there we like she like refuses to like

so what's her metric for countries is it like manners and adherence to the law because those feel like it's too high was Canada a hero do they love the law they're pretty like good like respectful people yeah not not the level of Singaporean adherence to law

but I guess that's just because of the deterrent threat I think she just wanted to leave China I think it's like her watching her parents like live through the cultural revolution everything and like the sort of the war the cultural revolution where they like

I think it ended in 79 I don't know when it started I think it was like 10 years what was it it's basically I think it's kind of a when Mao Zedon wanted to destroy any sort of image that reminds people

of like the old thought so really like a lot of like cultural stuff so like we destroyed a lot of our own cultural stuff My mom says this. When we went to the British Museum, there's like a lot of Chinese stuff in there. And she always holds the stank that like,

this is bad, but also it's good that like it's stolen because then it's preserved because we would have destroyed it. And we always fight about it. You're welcome. Hey, don't worry. Wow.

You're trash. Truly. Well, I'm looking for the silver lining. Halish. You got to let him do that. I don't think you get to do that. Sorry. It's okay.

I think it's good to fight. Okay. With your mom. Like your perfect precious mom? Yeah, yeah. We talk about that a lot. She's great. Yeah.

I think because she doesn't dislike the country, but I think she's actually experienced the sort of negative impacts of its policies. Whereas I miss China because I didn't experience it. So to me, it's far away. So we have different standards. That's so funny. There is a type of Irish person who's been in England for so long that they have, that they miss a country that does not.

exist like you'll meet them and they'll be talking about in Ireland and you're like are you thinking of the 1800s by any chance are you thinking of a play you saw are you thinking of a song your grandmother used to sing in a pub are you thinking of a funeral you once attended because none of these are the country I grew up so it's like fascinating they're reaching for a dream yeah exactly and it's a and it might be a film made by an American the version of the country they're thinking of you're like huh fascinating yeah they miss P.S. I love you, I think, question mark. So, um, that's quite sweet that you're from that generation of being like, I have idealized a country that I haven't really been raised in.

Yeah, because I left when I was like seven. Yeah. So like I didn't really, I was a little, little. Teen, yeah. Oh. What is your, um, idealized version of China? Well, I know that it's not, oh, I don't know if I'm allowed to say this. Oh, sorry, that was the most. No, no, no, no, keep this in. That's an incredible answer. It's a terrifying answer. Are you not Because what if I go viral in the next three years? And then this clip goes back to the government. So my question was going to be, are you scared of your mother or are you scared of the Chinese government?

And it turns out the answer was the Chinese government. Well, I'm scared my... Can it be both? Well, because my mom's in Singapore now. I think she's safe. I just have high hopes for my career. And what if I get superfeited? You should have high hopes for your career.

That's the good thing. You're very talented. And the only way that that's going to happen is if you're adherent to the... Chinese government's expectations of your family, frankly. I need to talk to China. I really don't know fully what happening right now. It's a good market. It's a big market. Is it? I think I actually, I've heard that it's like, it's probably easier to make it in China.

Well, I mean, I guess you have to learn the language from beginning. Yeah, that's actually really good at that. Yeah. Which one should I love Mandarin? I think you should learn Mandarin. Mandarin. Is that the Hale? That's Nihal. I thought you said, is that.

I've got a word. I thought Helen said, is that the hell? I don't know, but I'll say that. know that that's what we would play. I don't think I'd be able to learn it. You went to Germany with no German and then... No, I went with some German. Yeah, how much German?

Not a lot. No, yeah, conversational. Okay. Like, it just took me a couple of months to, like, be able to get to the point where I could, like, do a full job interview and, like, get a job and work in it. Did you like the kebabs? That's fast. Loved the kebabs. You were just talking about the kebabs.

I literally just had a kebab. Like, last week in Vienna. Yeah? Yeah. Do you like the kebabs? Yeah, Mustafa was in Burbank. Berlin. Slay!

You see what I'm saying? My stuff is Kamuzza Kabab. I'm coming with the knowledge. Slay! I'm coming with the references. The regular. You've got to calm all. Don't fuck with it.

Yeah, because they put fried potatoes in there. Yeah. Right? Yeah. And it's a long queue and there's like a wind tunnel outside the thing. So it blows at you're really cold, but no one leaves.

Oh, it's like a tent. It's like a thing as well as like the best kebab in Berlin. So it's like got this insanely, long queue all times yeah but it's not like that restaurant that everyone says is the best restaurant in London but actually is a lie for tourists what is my restaurant okay happy you know by the comedy that can't be no it's not it's not that can't be that's like on the outside you're like there's a terrible place you yeah and yet somebody has managed to create an algorithm such that it seems like it's the best one in London so they just queue and we're all like do do doodle don't mind

us don't tell them about Chinatown yeah it's really stressful there's probably a Chinese bakery right next to it the burger at the comedy store is probably better than Abby I will make it's a real statement I will make no comment on the food of the comedy store because I'm very grateful for the work oh yeah me neither the comedy store is my Chinese government

I will not be bored against them thank you so much I've not eaten there I've not yeah I have to earn my spot yeah you got to do it 20 first yeah you'll get there before you can tag off the food thank you very much you can go and do an open spot in order food.

Yeah? Yeah. There's a phone. No, but then you're paying to gig. That's a nightmare. I don't want to eat in the green room. I don't want to these. It's too much of a power move for an open spot, I think.

Yeah, yeah. Why is this kid eating? Yeah. How is he having a full meal? Why is he nervous? Like, what's going on? I think I'd be fine with that if you wanted to do eat in the green room. Yeah.

Imagine if I ate now. Wouldn't that be disrespect? I eat all the time on this podcast. It would be horrible. It would be horrible. I hate the sound of it. I don't want to be around chewing. It really upsets me when she does it.

I get peckish, like really quick. Now I'm hungry because we've just talked about about. What are we having? For lunch? Yeah. Oh, I don't know. We just had lunch together. Your dream snack?

My dream snack. Oh, my God. Sorry off menu. We can ask it to. I want to say probably a hazelnut chocolate. Hazelnut dark chocolate. Dark chocolate? Yeah, Dalaiian salt dark chocolate with milk.

Is that from weight clothes? Like to drink? The milk is to drink? The milk is for a concept, yeah. You take a bite of chocolate and then you do a bit of milk to balance it out. Yum. What's the brand? I hate, don't scream at me.

I'm never screaming. He's actually never screaming. I hate men drinking milk. Why? We've been over there so many times in the podcast. Because it's a real classic Irish man move. Irish men have a pint of milk with their dinner a lot of the time. Really?

Yeah. Is that why their bones, do you have a good bone? they're not strong yes they are it's a very solid point I just don't like the the optics of it it's white it looks like you miss your mommy it's creamy it's yeah like

where's my mummy like I need my like it helps my boat there was an advert here for Petit Blue where it's like it helps your bones go stronger like it just makes me think of that and I'm like your bones are fine like I like it because no other drink

looks like milk yeah for good reason Because it's grim and it's minginging and it's got like cream in it. Look at his little sweet face. He's fine. He's fine. I think it's a cold milk. Yeah, cold milk. It has to be cold.

For sure. Yeah. What kind of milk are you having? Full fat. Whoa. I don't do the, don't gag on a podcast. Yeah, that's not nice. What about the listeners?

That fire. Let me tell you, if ever a podcast cared less about a listener response, I think I would like to hear that podcast because it presumably is it 100% burbs. because we are not considerate, I would say, as podcasters. I will say my gassy phase has ended. Wait, can I ask? Yeah, of course. How come you guys are the trusty hogs?

Oh my gosh, thank you for asking. Can I say no one asks us any questions? Because that's very, it's a very specific imagery. Well, we met up to name our podcast and indeed confirm whether or not we wished to do a podcast together. So we had to do a lot of admin about whether or not we would abandon it halfway, what we were prioritizing, blah, blah, blah, blah. But I was tired that day. and Helen thought it had to have

pigs or hogs in the title and pigs is in so many podcasts I like the animal yeah yeah and then let's get let's put a pin in that okay I want to revisit that is that okay yeah oh my god 100% please that you're on agenda this is your time

yeah and then we trusty was just like a version of like we were trying to think of all the things we had in common as well as being sort of like swine like and reliable was the only thing we could think of this is good start so trusty hogs was born because it in him implies the existence of like scheming pigs or sort of laxadaisical hogs yeah sort of unreliable

um what a word thank you lexadayical yeah sort of like to go with the flow too easy too relaxed yeah yeah yeah yeah these other podcasts yeah they're lexadaisal looking guys but we will show up every week even if it's to be disgusting yes and so there you are yeah yeah yeah yeah how do you feel that pigs i like them they're the last animal in the zodiac yeah okay yeah that's why i like it too. I don't know that. I know we had a moment of connection. What does that mean?

I think so in ancient times, the 12 animals had to do a race to determine their position in the zodiac. And the pig came in last. Is this year of the animal? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the rat was, it's first.

Whoa. Because he's scheming. Because so basically what happened was the rat. Yeah, what, yeah, that's fine. And the rat, I'm a tiger. The rat sat on the ox, who's second, and then close to the finishing line, he leaped off the ox. That's genius. And took the first.

Fair play to the rats. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. I'm going to start a rival podcast. Yes, you should be scheming rats. And I'll upload a day before you guys. Oh, my God. Every time.

I'm really hoping we're both the air of the pig, me and Catherine. Oh, that will be safe. We can't be because we're like not 12. What have I? You, 89. 88. God bless you. 88, that's...

Okay, can I guess? I think that's... You can guess. I think that's rat, no? Dragon. Oh, it goes back, sorry. So you are the dragon. Is dragon good?

Of course. It's the one that's not real. That's good, isn't it? Okay, nice. That's special. Okay, great. Okay, you ready? Dragons are known for

their vibrant and energetic nature, their spirit of independence. creativity, leadership, sense of justice, and passion in relationships. I think yes to a lot of that except the first part. You don't think you're fucking?

No, before the passion. What was the bit before that? Sense of justice? No, no, no, way at the top. Vibrant and energetic. That's the one for me. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, I do. No, it's like you didn't know what the start meant.

I do have a sense of justice and passion. Vibrant and energetic, I would say I am not. Really? Yeah. I think you're vibrant. You light up the room. When you picture a dragon, are you picturing the sort of

the red dragon from Schrague? Are you picturing the long Chinese dragon? In this context, I was imagining a green dragon. Lovely. Yeah, and sort of long, but that's just because I think we were already in an Asian headspace.

And green, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's why I was thinking. But what are you? I was thinking you were like a golden dragon. Oh my God, sick. It kind of like breathes water. Breast water. Like you're attacking.

water dragon yeah like your attack would be like a water spray i'll take it that like blast like someone yeah someone heckles you on the side i would i would love to be able to do that i mean that is actually i think i'm more fiery on stage if anything i'm kind of mean if anyone heckles me but um you're very lovely i think i killed them with kindness yes yes yes yes very good trick oh no yours isn't very nice jen tiger yeah why what's the tiger saying why would you do this this is not good what's a thing are you upset right now i am my my phone's broken so it says tiger people like to be in control of things they are quick tempered and emotionally intense when they are upset i'm about to throw a tantrum on the podcast tigers aren't supposed to go

well with pigs i think oh really so this is so you guys probably can't fuck what it's ruled out Oh my God, I'm a goat Never mind, you're fine, you're back in Woo! Don't, I do not want I don't want either of you coming close to me A tiger and a dragon versus a goat Like, I am fucked

I want to guess goat is like wisdom Or sacrificial I feel stubborn as the word that would come up Interesting Okay, good and a stew Are you ready? Good on a curry? Nice in a curry, yeah

Oh, that'll be nice I love curry Goats You're in the curry Oh, well I still like curry Yeah, be warm beside a bed of rice you know just for dipping just for dipping

lovely wouldn't it okay goats are very intelligent and curious animals their inquisitive nature is exemplified in their constant desire to explore and investigate anything unfamiliar which they come across I love true crime this is true you're very curious

you're too curious I was watching the documentary about the John Bonnet Ramsey murders and I genuinely think given a bit of time I could solve it they communicate with each other by bleating. Oh wait, is this just facts about goats?

Yeah, this is... Did you Google what's good about... Oh shit? Yeah, yeah. Did you Google for me what's bad for tigers? This is the personality

of the animal goats. Goat brackets general. Yeah, because the next one of mothers will often call their young kids to ensure they stay close by. This is goat's dash Wikipedia. That's so... What I mean? You want to goads

bracket zodiac, I think. Yeah. Goads, fiction. By, I, okay. Code's vibes. Not goats, scientists. Let me type in character qualities. Helen, you said earlier that it was frustrating as a listen to have to listen to me, remember the names of things.

Listening to you, Google is also pretty painful. It's exhausting, isn't it? I like it. Have we maintained a, a narrative so far? Oh, that's not what this is. Okay. Tell me about your jump-office. Kind-hearted, strong-minded, determined and disciplined.

They are inclined to focus on their own thing. usually look a little one second i've got to upload it they're declined to focus on their own thing even if we're having a conversation i've lost it again jinn your jumper my yes my jump i bought it online i love it is that bad for the planet of course you bought that jumper online yeah this is an online do you want to talk the audience through it i think i got a i got a i was 18 and i was like i have to reinvent myself visually wow and then the moment i said that i got targeted ads and then I was like yeah yeah yeah yeah and then I was like yeah I need to be a new person I think because I felt ugly in high school but not in a bad way Justin I actually think thank you for the

clarification because I think there's an appropriate level of self-loathing in high school that if you don't have you sort of do become a psychopath you don't succeed I do I concur so just a normal level of self-loathing I was just like I was like okay I'm really fun no doubt you are I'm just reading this is when I was 18 yeah and then I was like I think I'm like funny so it's okay if I'm ugly I was like I was like that trade yeah I was like I'm this is great 100% luck fade these handsome boys are so dull yeah yeah there's no vibes here that is the correct observation they are so bored they're the three fittest boys my year at school holy crap yeah their personality was just there yeah that was their

past them. They were there. The three most popular women in my school, girls in my school, one of them is in prison. One of them is so funny. One of them makes and sells her own hair bands. And the other is like a spokesperson for milk. So, um, call back. Yeah. What about the hairbands? I love that. Yes. And I cannot say anymore. No, you mustn't. Because it will become too revealing. Um, but we talk about the spokesman from milk? How come they have to? Milk sells it. itself, I agree. I agree, but I guess they sort of need like a revamp now that everyone's got alternatives.

So it's sort of like back to earth kind of energy. Right, right. They can do that Got Milk campaign thing with the American States.

Sorry, do you do water with your cereal if you're not doing milk? No, she does, she likes it with cereal but she doesn't respect it with, as accompaniment to other meals,

like in a glass. And I have porridge. I have porridge. And are you doing that with water or milk? No, milky. Okay. Oh, a little look down.

Yeah. She's feeling embarrassed. in Kotler chop because frankly you're right you did catch you right there no it's drinking a glass of milk that's minging pure because i have hot chocolate all the time i have nesquicks you have nesquick that's just milk it's chocolate flavored you like ice cream that's just milk that's just milk i do like ice cream but i like flavors in it i don't want like a milk flavored ice cream apart from the cereal milk ice cream that i had in new york that was really nice can we circle back oh yes sorry may i sorry to be a pedant but

you were like I'm going to reinvent myself visually and you ordered a black and white jumper yeah but before that I was only wearing rainbows I was wearing oh my god the cutest boy in all of school yeah yeah no no I was just like this looks rebellion I don't I liked it it's really cool it's a fun word

Taka original yeah yeah great yeah I wish they we should get paid for this surely is that a Nike tech no they would never But they would get sued. Yeah. It looks like it, though.

But this is like, what is TACA original? They liked when I said sued to death. They really did. They did. Everybody laughed at sued to death. That's good stuff. I liked it. It's good stuff.

But some people do get sued to death, no? Oh, wow. That's such a dark point. Sorry about that. No, you're right. I guess some people are sued into oblivion. What? And destitution.

And then I guess. Is this a fun jumper? It's just a fun jumper. It's just a fun jumper. It's so nice. Did you have friends in this? school. Oh my god. No, my God.

Valid question. I think that's a fair question. Imagine if I was like, no. I didn't really. I'm really sorry. No, no, that's fine. I didn't like but that was my on me. I was like, I'm good with my book. Yeah, but he was just making fun of people who didn't have friends. No, no, no, no, it's cool. I was fine with this. My facetiousness caused me this no. I will sue you to death if you don't answer the question.

Okay, okay. Did you have friends? I had so many friends. I have more friends than the school than the student population. People from other schools were coming to be like, is my friend here? Is there a gin here? Hey, has anyone seen Jim? I had really good. I had really good friends since secondary one, I think. What is that?

Seventh grade. I want to say 12. Okay. Yeah, I'd say 12. Are you still friends with them? Yeah, I'm going to one of their weddings. Nice. Yeah.

Sorry, how old are they? They're 26. When Singapore, people get married early. because I think a big characteristic of Singaporeans is like they want to take the boxes and go through the, which I respect. I think that's a way to live. Also, it's a great way to move out there as well because you're so like you're with your parents. Yeah. Until you're married or is it not so much?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You kind of, you get to bid for a house, blah, blah, blah. So he's getting married in April. Nice. They're my good group of boys. I went to a boys school. Did you? From 12 to 16.

and then 16 the ladies came in it was coad and did they all walk in on the same morning together they walked in in a row bikinis no champagne we were 16 it was crazy it was Christian school it was nuts

you were just spraying them down it was crazy to like hip-hop music I'm sorry it is absolutely deranged to be like co-ed at 16 to be like single sex schools and then to be like what let's wait till they are their most hormonal most horny most socially inept

most confused and then release the girls like release the girls it's insane did you all play that song here come the girls girls yeah we didn't have that but oh but a lot of them

a lot of them came from girls schools yeah of course yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and then oh god I can smell the hormones on that day already I can smell it Asian people don't really have B.O.

What the fuck? So you can't smell shit. That's a crazy claim. You can't smell shit. That is an insane claim. It's no, it's true. That's an insane claim. We don't have, bro.

If my phone wasn't broken, I'll Google it right now. So you think Asian people don't have hormones. No, B.O. He's saying they don't have B.O. That's a crazy claim. Okay, okay. This is what I, this is, this is true. I think some Chinese people don't have the gene that gives you B.O.

No way. I wouldn't lie about it. I'm not, hey, I know we're talking about a Chinese government. We're going to believe this, but this cannot betray. No, this feels like something you've been told to say by the Chinese government. This is, yeah, smell me right now. I know this is a podcast. If this is a smell cast, come on.

Okay, there's no smell. Come on. I don't have VO right now because it's like the middle of the day. I'm going to go for sprint. And then cool, cool, all. Well, it's this like we have an intolerance to alcohol. That's why we turn red. So I'm sure there's something.

Whoa. But I turn. read when I have alcohol and I'm deeply intolerant to it. We're both Chinese. Whoa! That makes no idea. We're all the same, aren't we? I love rules. This checks out. Yeah. I do want to know if that B.O. thing is true that because that's amazing.

Me too. Could we Google that? Is that possible, please and thank you? But also, I should do a problem as well. And also, I feel bad that we've made M. Google up because I feel like that's bad for your search history. But last question, before we do get into the problem. Yes. Do you get people coming to you for advice often? no i'm a really good listener okay but people don't ask for your advice i've used that to my advantage katherine interesting same the reason why i had so many friends was because i was known as like a wound

liquor i had the biggest tongue for wounds are you a wound liquor katherine is a hundred percent i think that's a fair i br i was like interesting a little bit of an ambulance chaser yeah yeah yeah yeah i was so good at until people started being like oh is jenhow the wound liquor you know what me they figured it out they figured it out they figure out my tactic but what were you using it for just to have friends this is like early careers fantastic okay great and here's and so if people do come to you for advice what kind of advice do you give other than just listening i truly believe and this is not facetion i actually think you know the flea back scene where the therapist is like you already know what you're going to do yeah i would truly believe that like i think

people know what they're going to do and I think the choice you make is always the right one because of the virtue of you making it even if it turns out to be a mistake in the future yeah ellen says that a lot she's like the choice you make will always be the choice that like the right choice will always be the choice that you make and i always think like what an optimist's view on the world here's what i think you can never escape uh regret or joy so it's like whatever choice you make and wherever you end up you'll probably still be as happy and as sad so I don't think your choices like exempt you from like those feelings so you should choose the one that so that's why the one you choose is correct that's what I think there's a

sort of nihilistic and ability to that that makes me think do you think we have agency yeah yeah I just mean like I just mean like I think I'm as happy as I was 10 years ago just in terms of like I think the amount of joy that I feel you. And I don't think I'm more happy now because I have a career. I think I've always been this happy. But I've also been this sad. And I think so like and so I don't think my like joy and sadness is determined by my choices, I think. That is true in psychology. That yeah, that you go back to your original state. So you are like naturally a certain amount. Like if you won the lottery regardless of how much it is and how it plays out within a year you are back to your natural state. Like

even with a big change, like really depressing as well, like you are either happy or like you're that same mix-up of chemicals. Yeah, I think that's what I mean. I think though that's a different example

because I feel like we can't always determine our natural state if we're in like massive financial distress. True. So I don't, I feel like the lot of the sort of different example because some people will like, we'll be fighting such a constant battle

that you would be more like capable of knowing you're not. natural self if you weren't constantly It just so happens to no one ever comes to me with advice about huge financial They're always like should I go on this date I'm like yeah you'll be the same They're not like if I cash in my check for two million pounds

Will I lose my true sense of self They're like what do you think of the stock Well the TikTok I watched Said that the lottery example And I had a lot of likes on it So I think it is correct what I said Okay yeah Yeah because you chose it

yeah it's correct because it came to you thank you jen we're ready for our problem i think okay this is so fun may i say to whoever is sent in this problem i cannot guarantee advice what but let's hear it um first of all the asian b o thing is true what to say more i don't understand many of the words in this sentence but it says the characteristic human axillary odor is formed by bacterial action on odor precursors that originate from apocrine sweat glands. Caucasians and Africans possess a strong axillary odor, whereas many Asians only have a faint acidic odor. Whoa. Crazy. That's such a cool brag. Which which was my camera. Right down the middle. Right down the middle. This is so silly. Congratulations. Whoa. That's sick. Do you buy the

you just think fuck it it's a con i'm trying to that's for white people no no no i'm trying to my dream for the next year is to get a blue de chanelle sorry what yeah yeah my dream for the next year is to get a blue the chanelle perfume okay but the question was do you have deodorant oh sorry i i don't need the deodorant you're gonna get a very nice perfume but the answer is you don't actually i don't never bought children no that is so great what we're saying wow come to my soho run it's gonna smell gorgeous getting money from mitcham for a sponsorship deal when you bloody need it's all right you deserve your chanelle i hope you get it i yeah i want to be able to

it's not that but i just want to be i want to be able to buy it and not feel like i'm not worried yeah yeah that's my goal for me yeah i'm just so serious according to hell and indeed you it'll make you no more happy or sad than you were currently. So what's the fucking point of anything? Probably. But you'll smell like an angel. I'll smell like Timothy. Is that what he wears?

Oh, he's in the ad. He's in that really confusing ad. He's in a film? What is this? I want to smell like abstract. Yes. I want to smell very confusing. I like that dream because it is attainable.

Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's nice. Do you guys have unattainable? Constantly we're women. Ready. This is a problem from B. Hi Bee! Hi Hogs, I'm getting married in January, brackets, lesbian wedding.

Congratulations. And I need help with an etiquette slash communication question. Here we go. After a year of searching for my perfect non-traditional wedding dress, I reached out to a small local brand and asked if they could custom make me a dress. The woman who runs the brand was so lovely and helpful and made me a gorgeous dress. Unfortunately, when it arrived, it was not quite what I had pictured. Luckily, my mum has stepped in and is making multiple alterations to make the dress perfect.

my questions are one do I need to tell the original designer that I'm altering the dress and two in my Instagram picks should I tag her I know she likes to repost pictures to pictures of customers in her dresses especially brides and being a small and sustainable business

I would love to get her the recognition however given that I have changed to the design from her original work what should I do thanks so much for your help and for always making me laugh this is sick gin this is really good stuff

it's really good stuff because there's like issues of like femininity and love and also social media yeah when there's social media element came in I was like this is good it's good stuff I don't believe it what I think someone wrote this

it's too perfect of a problem you think M scripted it yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I saw you guys I saw you guys workshoping this no it's always whenever the problem has ever been made of which it was I think exclusively once early doors when we didn't get enough in Andrew would always just

Well I think maybe we didn't even put it out We tried and but Andrew was Andrew's problem That's the thing It would just Andrew being like There's this person and he's having my exact life And he's having my exact life in issues And you're like Andrew you gotta hide it my guy So no it's definitely a real problem

Yeah Let's assume she said multiple Adjustments and changes And she's saying like Also why don't tag the mom She's not gonna tag them The mom made the alterations I don't think the mum's running a small business.

Yeah. You've got to give credit what it's due. The mum has credit on the day because the wedding wouldn't happen if she hadn't pushed. Do you know what I mean? You don't know that she doesn't come out for talk. Okay, well, either way, you're pushing something. She grids me. Well, unless it wasn't biological.

Okay. Your family is valid. Your mom's celebrating the way. No, but what is your thought? What do you think? Oh, I think she should do two grid posts, one of the original. dress and then tag the creator and then block the creator and then post the other one. And then block the greatest.

This is my, this is comes, this is after a year of doing social media. Wow. Working with designers, poster designer. I think you should give credit and then block them. Wow. Have you heard this exact problem? No. This is fascinating.

I think that's a nightmare having to block someone. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's crazy advice. Make, make, make a separate account and buy. the meta verified badge. No. So then that looks official

and then you post yeah, yeah, yeah, tag them in the matter. You're a moron? Oh! Helen! No, sorry, but Ellen!

No, what the fuck, are we serious? Let the record show, oh! Yeah, that was really harsh. It wasn't harsh, it wasn't harsh, just go back to listening. That was mental, no?

Yeah, but you can just call a person a moron, that's so mean. Sorry. It's okay. We had the kebab moment. That was nice. That was harsh, man. And remember when I liked your jumper.

Yeah. Can I say, I think this is quite tricky because we don't know what level of alterations, but I wonder if this person, if he gave the original designer the chance to make the alterations to look how they want, because it sounds like you didn't, which I think maybe, okay, so if I get my dress in and it's completely not what I was expecting, the only reason I don't go back to the original designer is I feel like she was not getting it. Like she wasn't, like we are on different wavelengths. I have said very clearly what I want. and this is not happening. My mother is fully capable and seems to be capable of listening to me, so I'm going to go with her. In which case, from the designer's point of view, you didn't say there was an issue

and then you've made these changes. That might be a bit surprising. So I would probably reach out and say, hey, thank you so much for all of your great work. Love my dress. In the end, decided actually to make a couple of alterations, which my mom was able to do for me because and I would just

would you still like me to tag you? I assume yes but if there's any issue I won't tag you that's no problem that is what I would do it's like a little heads up

and it sounds like you're just asking your mom to do it because you're saving money that way but also want to be respectful of your art so just going to make sure that you want me to tag you if it's just like a sizing thing

and or then I would tag her if it's that you asked her to make those amends and that went to Ryan that you're changing it again I maybe wouldn't tag her because it sounds like maybe in tagging someone you are advertising

for something like you pay them to help them sustain their business you advertise as a sort of endorsement of their business and if you think she wasn't able to or wasn't listening to you to the point of it being like you don't actually think people to go to her then I wouldn't tag her

that I hadn't thought about that like you're worried about not supporting it as a small business but you have supported the small business by using their business. By paying, yeah. The tagging is a bonus. Yeah, the tagging is like endorsement and advertisement, I would say, as opposed to sustaining. Yeah, but you just need to decide whether the alterations

that your mum has done are altered enough to the point where it's not the dress that the person made for you. I think you need to check, I need to ask why you've gone to your mom instead of her. If it's like you just wanted to save money, fine. Then you can tag her, just ask her if it's okay that you do that if it's because

he wasn't listening then it's kind of stressful or you could do the I'll tag you on a story but not on the grid or you can't that's a big thing isn't it Lee like

I'll share the gig in my story because they're like can you share this and it's like I'm not doing a grid post or you can tag and then if she doesn't share that means

oh I just no I think because the wedding photo has to be grid so it's grid anyway yeah that's true but maybe you're not just storying your wife

that's a good point just just sorry I'll just do story for a wedding It's fine That's such a good point Yeah I'm checking with her If she wants me still to If I think she provided a good service

But if the reason that I'm getting my mom To the alterations is because of the service Then I'm probably not tagging I just want to know what the alterations are I know we don't have enough It feels dimontase Behave yourself, no it doesn't It does, it does

It feels like adding crystals To me it feels like Oh like literally glittery gems. Oh yeah? Like the jazzling but for clothes. Ah.

I never explained that way around I just realized. Yeah. Yeah. I was thinking like it's like they've made her

like a like a traditional dress and her mom put like angel wings on it. Look at, look at Zofia. Can you see there? The Cher T-shirt? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's bedazzled. That's bedazzled. I would say. You see that shares wearing angel wings are such a good shirt. Oh my God. That's the thing though if I was a dress designer

and somebody put like fairy wings on my dress, I'd be like, on tag, I'd be blocking you. So they can untag now. Yeah, they can untag. So there is that as well.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can what? You can untag. There we go. Yeah, you can untag. It feels like De Montes to me, in which case the dress has been changed. Yikes. It's gone from mere to glam.

But the designer might not care. Yeah. The designer might have, it depends also how many followers you have, right? Like, if you have 100,000 followers, you might have altered my dress a bit, but I'm like, you're still sending a lot of people my way, traffic-wise so that's fine I just think you should ask her if you got 4159 followers

like you're grand yeah yeah yeah I really want to yeah that was my audience like how many followers do you have yeah that being said if you do come and see any of us performing stand-up please do put us in your stories even if you did not enjoy every part of the evening

and even if you are adding angel wings to my picture and even if you only have 459 or indeed 159 or indeed 59 or do 59 followers all followers are rallied thank you. But if you've got 58 we don't. No, don't fucking bother. Jesus,

friend, don't waste a late time. That being sad, does someone have some shows on? I'm at the, I, I'm okay with 50s or less. I'm at that point in my career.

But under 12, under 12, under 12, get out of here. If you have less than 12 followers, get out of here. Okay? But weirdly, we're all okay with sex.

Yeah. Yeah, that's cute. That's so classic. Six and verified, what's happening? Yeah, that's incredible. That's really good.

But wait, so you have shows. Where can people find you? Um, they can find me. Well, Sohu Theater 27 Jan to 8th February. I'm doing my first hour. It's great.

It's a really good time. Oh, you guys came together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was really lovely one. It was a really good time.

We'd have a really good time. We sat behind Josie Long and we all lost her minds laughing. Oh, that's right behind Josie Long. Yeah. I think you guys came on a kind of a midday, which is okay. I think that you forget that we also have done the Edinburgh Fringe multiple times.

I would never forget that. And so, well, I actually think that's one of the things I constantly thought about when you guys were in the room. I actually was like, no, but the consequence of that is that we know that you are one of 12 shows people are madly trying to watch in the same day. So they're not coming, like when people come to see you in the evening and they've been to work and they're going to see a comedy show, they go and they're like, ha ha ha ha ha. When they're seeing eight comedy shows in a day, they come into you, numbers five or whatever, and they're like, mm-hmm uh-huh yeah yeah

yeah nice ooh didn't see that mhm there's the call back and you're like we're winding it down now what

so like we know we know that was a good show you had a great show it was gorgeous but also we know that people are not necessarily bringing their usual audience energy

and we enjoyed it I was very honored you guys came we laughed very loudly I was honored we got tickets are you kidding yeah we had a great time

it was super just to be clear Gin is a sellout accent. Book your tickets for Sowa Theatre this side of Christmas. Like book them now. And by sell out, they mean like the tickets are gone. I still have my integrity. Oh yeah.

Sorry, yes. So much integrity. Yeah. No spare seats. But it's like packed. But so much integrity. But seatwise tricky. Yeah.

Yeah. And then they can find you online? At Jin Howley. I think it will be spelled on the Spotify and the Instagram. It will indeed And Jen will be tagged And I guess I can find you at the Chanel counter Yeah the Chanel counter

Yeah The blue in front of Shelby's face Oh that's so nice And if you can find him amidst all of his friends Because he's got loads He's fine Thank you And then you do Melbourne

You touring? We're going to Melbourne I love when comics say that's weird Who's the wee I just don't want to say I I know Right It feels too lonely

Well because I know that I say we I mean me and the audience yes that's so nice yeah is that fake of me is that fake and gross no it's so lovely because also you can't do a show

without the audience they're like an integral part of it I read um there's this Singaporean author her name is Amanda Lee Corey and then she posts the Instagram story about how like in reading my book you make it real

or something like yeah yeah oh yeah I think that's why we say we that's lovely but then when I bomb it's completely my fault sometimes the audience do have a part of that I do agree I think it's a conversation sometimes I've seen people have a joke ruined by an audience but just getting up to go to the toilet

like just the flow of it like sometimes it is the audience yeah but mostly it's our fault yeah sorry not really with me no thank you to our wonderful guys give it up for June Ali everybody Thank you so much to our executive producers in the executive producer lounge.

We have to thank Guy Goodman, Simon Moore, Annie Tonner, Stephanie Kattia, Oliver, Jago, Anthony Conway, Neil, Redmond, Madeline, Quinn, and Sadie Cashmore. We are so, so grateful. Thank you for supporting this podcast. So fucking grateful.

Couldn't do it without you. Thank you so much. We're so grateful. And thank you to our producers. You know them. Let's all sing along together. It's L, it's Richard Bold It's Harold Van Dyke

Tim and Dom David Walker, Rachel R, Clare Owen Jones Jess and Nick No, should we actually sing it? Let's do a voice, let's do a singing voice No, no, no no no no no No, sing it's Sarah and Molly Ria Fincaudelia

How will I know this tune? What tune is then? Rachel Paid will pick a tune What song do you want? Say the rest of them please Oh the single ladies Oh the single ladies Oh the single lady Rachel Page Helen A Tina Lindsay

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Alan Bauer, Sean Bauer. Michael didn't realize till we were older. Laura Pollock, Leah Overend, and our new producer, you're going to be enchanted by this, Stephen Chicken. Fuck all. It better be real. I know you can put in whatever name you want,

but that better be. That's incredibly sweet. That's incredibly sweet. A little gougon on our producers list. How nice. Thank you, Stephen Chicken. Thank you guys. Thank you for supporting the podcast. And listen, there's two and a half days worth of stuff over on the extras. If you want to join our Patreon, we'd love to see you there. In the meantime, have a gorgeous week. Buy our merch. Have a good time. It's rhythm and flow time. If you're feeling bad. Rhythm and flow time. It's a TV show to write. Yeah, the rap one. All right, forget it. Thank you. Bye.