Trusty Hogs - Ep168. Beef, Bobs & Bug’s Life

Episode Date: January 9, 2025

We are BACK and FULL of Beef (literal beef, not drama / rivalry). We recap our Christmases and New Years and get right back into the swing of things with a great festive family problem...NEW MERCH: trustyhogs.com/merchLEICESTER (15/2): Live Show TicketsThank you so much for listening!Support us at www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)All links: https://audioalways.lnk.to/trustyhogsSNThank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Annie Tonner / Stefanie Catracchia / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Neil Redmond / Madeline Quinne / Sadie CashmorePRODUCERS: Elle / Richard Bald / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Claire Owen-Jones / Jess & Nick / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate / Liz Fort / Taz / Anthony / Klo / Becky Fox / Dean Michael / Sophie Chivers / Carey Seuthe / Charley A / KC / Jam Rainbird / Tamsyne Smith-Harding / Hannah J / Ezra Peregrine / Bryn / Laura Pollock / Leah Overend / Steven Chicken / Hayley Singer / Dougie RobertsonWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, lovely listeners. It is I, Andrew White, from the podcast, Trustee Hoggs, which you are currently listening to. I have got some live dates coming up that I'd love you to be at if you are free and nearby. Lester, which is part of a big Trustee Hoggs Day. You can go see Helen, Catherine, and Trusted Hugs' Lives, and me all in one day. That's on the 15th of February. That's part of my, the last show of my current tour. I'm also going to Norwich on the 29th of January.

That is a rescheduled date from my previous illness, but it's a very lovely show, and I love you to come see it and I'm working on a brand new show which I'll be forming in Bristol on the 23rd of January which is the same day as Helen I'm in the same venue right after Helen's work in progress

which is sold out so if you've already got tickets to Helens why not stick around for an extra 45 minutes and come check me out as well 23rd of January in Bristol all those dates are in my link tree got to do the White Bauer double

the White Bauer's unfortunate Yeah that really is unfortunate Thank you Hello it's me I'm still on tour Catherine it started in March I know, and it will finish in March probably. But for now, if you haven't seen me, you'd like to. I'll be in Belfast on Sunday, the 19th of January.

I'll be in Margate on the 12th of February, Lester on the 15th of February. I will also be in Birmingham on the 19th of March, Glasgow on the 22nd of March, Edinburgh on the 23rd of March, Manchester on the 26th of March, and Bristol on the 28th of March. I'd love to see you there. Bye! It's cold again with feelings. Hello and welcome to episode 168 of Trustee Hoggs.

How the hell are you? We are rested. That's right. These women finally have some energy. to get talking i'm katherine bowhart she's helen bow wow and this is our podcast about our frankly perfect lives where we tell you how we you how we you are no we tell you how we are yeah so it's doing so well it's a new year it's a new me i will not succumb to failure um and that's my energy this year no we're supposed to be embracing failure nope nope nope no no jean we're on different algorithms

good for them congratulations to them they're not going to be able to own houses i understand where they're not just even trying anymore but we are on the cusp but i will keep it endeavoring so um yes we'll tell you about our lives and then we'll answer your lovely little problems they're also often very big problems and not that lovely but the point is we'll tackle them through the fog step forth the trusty hogs yeah you're gonna give me your problems and they will solve them or maybe they won't and that's your problem they'll have guests and Andrew white on the tech Oh, it's Helen and Catherine as the trusty hugs.

Trust the trusty hogs or maybe not. Now then, Helen. Hello. Hello. Happy New Year. Gayest present you got for Christmas. I'll go first. Combat trousers, waterproofs, old ex-army stuff that my girlfriend found in a vintage store in Dalston,

jadour, draw string trouser. Don't mind if we do. No pocket does let the gay side down, but that's all right. I adore them. Wow. I adore them. going to lie, I picked up about five of those ones. What? I don't

know why. I think I looked down the lens and then I stopped listening. Did you get distracted by your own reflection? I think I'm like, I saw I can see the screen over that. Hello. We are every friend group. It's just one of them being like, what's the gayest thing that's happened to you? And the other one being

like, I got a, I looked at myself in the mirror and I'm so cute. But I do want to be good this year of podcasting. So you got, you got I got waterproof ex- Army combat trousers and they're divine on me. Waterproof ex-army combat trousers. Was this a gift from a lesbian?

From my girlfriend. Yeah, that makes sense. It does. It checks out. Okay, sly. Do you feel like you look like, do you remember in Spice World, the Spice Girls movie,

when they all have combat outfits on? I can, but dream. The real shame of it is that despite my feelings about the armed services, their colours are my colours. I look, divine in. Combat Greens. You're so anti-Army.

I know, but military brands, yes, please. grays if we're at sea I can do blues navies hello divine on me it's a real show also I love to give orders can you go in as like a senior person I think that's aerobics instructors oh what I think like if you wanted to avoid being in the army but have that sort of power that's when you go into fitness let's go girls yeah yeah I like it and what and I can't really stay on count though no but that's sorry someone else could be doing the counting the person who's like you know the person who goes into the class and tries to be really up front with a teacher. Yes, although I already hate her. That's fine. They're working for you. Yeah, fine. Okay, she can keep the beat while I rage at her.

Fine. Oh my God. How fun. I'm really happy for you for getting these trousers. Thank you so much. What was your gayest gift, please? I mean, I only got like two gifts. We don't do gifts. We just did like Airbnb. And I got a jigsaw puzzle. Pretty gay. From my cousin Beth. It's giving solo meditative time to think but the women that you wistfully miss. And I did it immediately. It was like, yeah. What was it of? It was of the signs of the zodiac.

And I loved it. I'm sorry, I'll ask my question again. What was the gayest Christmas gift, you got? I got the 12 signs of the zodiac Christmas puzzle. It wasn't hard to answer. And I had gold foil. I think it was so easy, actually. That's a gay gift.

That's like being like, I got a rainbow-themed Christmas puzzle. Like, obviously, yeah. Do you think she knows? Yeah, I think your whole family listen to the podcast. I wish they would. but they do. Hi, Katie Beth and God. Hi, guys. Shout out.

No, you're listening right now. Enjoy Byron Bay. You don't tell Anne. Yeah. Byron Bay, how nice. I know. I think I live close to that. I actually don't know where they live.

It's somewhere around. Shout out to your cousins, wherever they might be. Enjoy your Australian adventures. I think what else did you get? I got this cardigan. I love my little cardigan. I got this cardigan from Ellen and I bought her an almost identical jumper.

Cute. So we look like very norm. straight family running for office energy family where we might also have children in knitwear but that was fun is that like a is it like a thing for lesbians this year like knitware no it was it just happened to be that we did we both we live we live in a cold house I think I think it just goes for sort of renters understood I got some lovely really lovely bits Ellen's mom got me a beautiful knife for you're with the entire family yes so I put my first Christmas away barring um lockdown this is my first one

first Christmas away for my family. Yeah. And so I did it with Ellen's family and oh my God, they made such an effort. Her mom got all three of the girlfriends stockings as well. Wait, well, wait, once again. I didn't realize that three girlfriends were being brought home. Yeah, three girlfriends. I thought I was the only girlfriend coming home, but one of them showed up afterwards,

the longest standing one, so she doesn't have anything to establish good for her, go you. But the, myself and the other newest girlfriend were there and I was thrilled she was there because she was from Liverpool and a great time. Great. But we, yeah, she got us stockings and she puts the same thing in everybody's stocking, which is so, so sweet and fair and kind and lovely. And yeah, it was really nice. And then the food was incredible because her mom's a great cook.

And we went bowling. On Christmas Day? On boxing day. There's bowling lanes open on boxing day? On boxing day. It was a huge. It was amazing. Yeah, it was actually, it's a really good way to spend Boxing Day actually.

You don't have anything else to say to each other. So just go and get an idea. Did you get such? poppies with vodka in there. No, but I got a chocolate milkshake as I was driving. Close enough. Close enough, I reckon. It's very Christmassy of me to get a chocolate milk. I couldn't drink any of it obviously because I was like, I'm so full.

I don't remember the feeling of hunger. I do look forward to that again. Really? I have not stopped eating since the 20th of December. I've got to stop soon, but, oh, it's so nice. You just watched me eat three poached eggs on toast for lunch. You know this. That's a classic meal.

Okay. and good for you. I snack on three times. I forgot that you're like a fucking protein machine. Yeah. I, oh my God. You are, aren't you? I am a protein machine to the point

where St. Neil basically shamed me the other day because I accidentally ate. Was it like 500 grams of beef? On Saturday night. It was awful. It was like, come again. I have to message him to find out how much it was. I think I had about 500 grams of beef.

How did you have a family pack of beef? Awful. How? How? Do not do not do it. it. How did you do it accidentally? What are you talking about? Because I was, we both made like big meals in the week and he made like a big chili. Right. And I made like enchiladas, chicken enchiladas. And I was like, oh, do you want to do a meal swap tonight? You have one of my enchiladas and I'll have some of your chili. And he went great. So I left him out like two enchiladas like wrapped up like clear. That's what he was having. And he was like, yeah, just help yourself to one of the boxes in the fridge. There were two boxes full of beef. And I was like, great. So I saw it. And I was like, oh, it's a, it's a chili soup. Like a chili soup. Like a cheese. chili soup. It's not like a portion of chili conkani that goes on rice, but it turns out it was just you're supposed to half the box again or quarter it. But I was like, I guess I'm going to box

beef. And then because I still have that like portion, like you, you finish what's given to you. So I heed up and I was like, God, this box is being like 20 minutes. Because every time I took out the Tupperware from the microwave, I stir it. Also, my muscles hurt from taking it to the microwave. Really, honestly. It was heavy. And it was like, every time I stirred it and it was on full power there was always like still cold in the middle i was like bloody that this is a lot of food isn't it but i wasn't really thinking because i had a gig to get to so i ate the whole thing and i came out and he was like did you eat that whole box of beef did you see the empty box and i was like yeah i thought it was like a soup and he was like that is 20% fat beef that is that is 500 grams of beef you just ate

and then i felt awful because as soon as i thought about it i realized that oh my god it was like was that painful and i was like yeah the last 20 spoonfuls were really tough There were more than 20s. Because I know you were supposed to have protein and I was like, this is good, I'm not having any carbs because I'm mental, because I'm mental. And then I had to go gig on a boat and that was rocket.

No. Yeah, it was awful. Helen, that is such a, I know, so I can actually see the logic. First of all, that is like a being raised by a 90s mom that was like, you were too fat, but also don't forget to finish everything on your plate, energy.

That was, we grew up with Atkins. So even though we know a balanced diet is ultimately necessary for nutrition, we also think that some head carbs are the enemy at all cost. but they are a little bit. Remember that, please. Especially, ladies. If you're not just having fruit,

you are giving up on yourself. You know fruit are carbs, right? Shut the fuck off. Oh, baby girl. Em, take the apple up my bag and burn it. Burn it! I'll have a calteen bar. I'll have another 800 grams of beef, please, sir.

For my health. For my health. Can you run around the corner and go to Tesco Express? I just need a little bit of special, okay? Let's weigh it out, 30 grams. Skin milk. And then water it through again, just in case. Oh my God, yeah, we grew up at the same time

Wait Well wait Ouch, oh gosh So much beef So much beef And then I did an hour long bus to the boat show Got on at the boat And it was like rocking

And I was in the back And I was like Motherfuck And it was sold out pat Because Chris McCorsland Who just won strictly was on And I was like breathing really heavy And they're like

MC and the other acts Were You OK And I was like I just ate 500 grams of beef And they were like Oh, why did you do that? And I was like I'm not really sure yet. Like I hadn't quite figured out what it happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me at least process, my body

process it and then my mind. The main thing is I was Anil because he went, did you just eat a whole box of beef? And he said it in a way that I felt shamed. Why are you holding the pig? I don't know, just to stabilize me. Yeah. Either way, I have passed it, we believe. Sunil believes, because I told Rich

Rutherton and Rich said, this is going to be like a brick tomorrow coming out of you. But it wasn't because Sunil was like there was also two cans of kidney beans than that. It was a big bowl. wait sorry there was sorry in that one box there were two I don't know I haven't asked I don't want to know more than I know how it was rich there was um cocoa and dark chocolate in it but how do you not like feel up so much that you're like yeah it wasn't well I wasn't well that's making me like

you know that fill you get sometimes where it's like you can feel kind of a top of your esophagus throat kind of you're like I don't know we're going to fit in yeah wow yeah wow I had to get off the bus. So you've had a big few weeks while we had been apart. 20 minutes early and walked the rest of the way really slowly. Just to get it to move down. And then had to do the stairs in Waterstones at Trafalgo Square just to try and dissipate it a little bit.

Oh my God. Hellen. Because it was so much peace. What a life. Food's really an event sometimes, isn't it? I made a mistake. Yeah. Yeah.

I made a mistake. It happens to the best. I literally don't think that mistake could happen to me just because I don't think I could have gotten it down. So fair play. That's a real feat. I was watching. something whilst eating.

You've got to distract. So I wasn't paying attention. What was the question? When you say I had three eggs, so obviously like I'm full the entire time, I ate possibly a quarter of a cow and then went into the gig. No, but definitely like a hind. Like I don't know about a quarter, but like that's a big part of the leg. Well done for crushing the gig.

And it had chorizo in it as well. It was rich. How was there chorizo in that as well? He likes to do it as a flavor. a base for putting the onions on. Oh my God. That's so intense. Yeah, it was tough.

Okay, well, listen, and Big Christmas is what we're saying. Did you have a nice time, generally speaking? I genuinely did. So it seemed like it went okay. It went okay. What was the secret? Why was it so much better this year? I think five years of therapy.

Like, genuinely showing up weekly. Definitely has led to this. That's so impressive. Little things. Okay, go on. Everyone had the road. I had my own bedroom. I can't believe it's taken this long for you to get your own.

bedroom. I'm like, I could have told you that you did, like, you could have skipped some of the years of therapy. I was like, what about if you got your own bedroom? Well, no one in my family's house has more than like one spare room. Everyone's just like my room and a spare room. Yeah. So we're always on top of each other. And then usually my sister like finds her way into my room. Um, but this year like really like was not an option. She even set up bunk beds. It was quite sad. And I was like, I'm not getting it. I'm not getting in it. And she was like, well done well done well doing it well done um it was great and she didn't come into my room well done um go go both of you physically i was a bit violent with her to ensure that she didn't like a lot of like

physically holding back do you want us to cut that out no no no no no i'd say it was like sister like you know when you put the hand on the head and they can't come any closer oh fine that's fine that's like that's like when you do the bart simpson arms yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah sometimes you have to be like oi but it was great everyone was in top form i think everyone has held a younger sibling like at the forehead well they bash about and you just be like no sweetie sweetie no i think i might feel it to you at some point yeah that's how that went way around that will have gone you you physically could not do it to me no i but i also can't imagine me being like more physical touch more if i just can't fathomish what helen's lovely sweaty palm on your forehead i don't think so i don't think so i don't think

so just having a full lamb rinser just holding your head my Christmas was nice too by the way I had a lovely time. But also, I forgot to tell you that after I went to Oxford, I went to Ireland. And so it was my parents' 40th wedding anniversary, so we all met up in Limerick. And just two nights at this B&B, and it was honestly stunning. But on the way home, we got to go to my aunt and uncle's farm, and so Ellen came with. Wait, wait, wait, you have to slow down. Tell me everything here.

It was just heaven. You flew to Limerick. And then you went to... Well, we actually flew to County Clare. We flew into Shannon Airport. Went to Limerick to stay in this hotel for two nights. The food was incredible. Took me through her.

My favorite thing about this hotel was there was this like a camp young guy who was maybe like 1920 who served the food and kept calling us all Miss and sir. Like a little Graham Norton. It was honestly, he had, oh my God, he was amazing. At one point we were like, what was said? Something was out of breakfast where one of my, I think my sister's girlfriend was like, oh, sorry, didn't mean to, like, didn't want to annoy. I think she was like joking with him about like, yeah, I better finish all my food or else to be insulted kind of thing. And he went, yes, that's right, miss. because hell hath no fury

like service people scorned and I was like I'm obsessed with you I was like I am in we would clean all of our plates and be like we didn't like that much and he was like I know aren't you all so bright iron stomachs

on a lot of it? Can I guess the hairstyle and accessories? Oh you'll never guess because it's limerick Oh okay I was gonna go for the like slightly emo griebo style of like swipy fringe

and those like stud earrings with like plastic little bits Hang it. Zero jewelry entirely presentable ready to go to mass like clean cup boy. Oh,

like Elder Price? Not quite. Just like a formal guy. Oh, damn it. And I was obsessed with him and I loved him so much he was so nice.

He was so cute. And also just to be called Miss and Ellen was loving being called Miss. Bit of fun, bit of a change. How fun. It was gorgeous. We had a lovely time

and then we climbed the highest mountain in Limberk but it's the flattest county you could ever find. So it's very short and very small was ideal um and my brother still technically a mountain you can still technically counts as a hill thank you so much so not a mountain my brother made us run up it um and so he was running and ellen

ellen was doing pretty well behind him and then i was just like trailing being like i'm coming i'm shorter than you but we had a nice time and then we went to this farm in limerick where my well in county clare where my family live and that was amazing because my cousin i just had a baby and the baby was there and it turns out the baby i've never i don't know if i'm alive to talk about the baby but I'll protect his privacy, except to say that he loves whistling. Well, we're all going to figure that out now, aren't we? That whistling baby and County Clare, we've all seen him on the movie. Well, that's that done.

Wait for it, though. Wait for it. It turns out Ellen, because she's like the oboe, is incredible at whistling. Oh, for fuck so. She puts on what I can only describe it as, babies make fools of us all, because there was like eight adults just watching her put on an eight-song concert for this baby. He absolutely hates Marine Five, but he loves the Beatles. and he's obsessed with Oasis.

Who hates Maroon Five? This kid, fair play to him. He's obsessed with the Beatles on Oasis, which is his dad's favorite music. He recognised it. And he's only 10 weeks old. He was just infatuated with her. It was so cute.

And at the end, my aunt was like, you'll have to come back for this like a music festival that has a whistling competition in their air. And I was like, oh my God, this is so funny. I wish Mammies will find any way to have the family around at any given moment. But it was gorgeous. My point is it was gorgeous.

he had a lovely time. I actually want to come to the whistling competition. I want, I want her to compete so bad. Like, I'm like ready to go full stage mom about it. I'm like, let's get you practicing.

Except that I hate whistling. Do you show you don't take like hogs on the road and do a special episode? That will be so fun. Ellen can be. We can sponsor Ellen. We can like comedy fuffle and trusty hogs. We could be used like Patreon to help sponsor the trip.

Imagine she goes out first round. Oh. It doesn't matter. We'll all enter just in case. Okay, perfect. Oh no, she's much better than that. She can do like proper full songs beautifully. Well, give me a song.

Give me a song. Okay, she did that one from, she did that one from, oh my God. I can't remember. Oh, no. No. It's all right. We'll get that. I can do this.

Which song, Catherine? It's a musical film about the Von Traffes. The Sound of Music. It's the sound of music. Which song? The one with all of the things that she likes. My favorite things. from the sound of music.

You know what? Fair play to her. Thank you. Because that usually takes a lot longer than that. I've been playing a lot of articulation. And by the way, I'm incredible at it because that's my whole life. So she's really good.

And that's the kind of thing. Yeah. But that's okay. What else I'm like? I really try. I know, sweetie pie. And I know that when you put your mind something, you can do it, see the 500 grams of beef.

But we don't have to be good at everything. Some things can just be half eaten. Helen? Yeah. Yeah. Well done. That's true. I'm proud of you.

Wait. So Christmas was the best ever. You had a swimming pool. I know I messaged you about the pool. I know I messaged you about the pool. But it's a game changer, right? Some of the hugs message me being like, I know exactly where you are. And I was like, lull, because...

No, don't message that. You guys. I know, I thought it's quite funny. No, you guys, I love you. But don't message I know exactly where you are. That's a mad thing to message anybody. It's so spooky. Okay.

I thought it was quite funny. I was like, I love you all, and all due respect, don't, even if you know exactly where I am, don't mention me that. Because there's so many in the family, we had to get, like, a place that's used for, like, yoga retreats and stuff. Someone was like, I've been to a yoga retreat there. I know exactly what you are. But it came with a pool that was open for, like, it was so weird. It randomly locked at 8pm and I was like, who was doing this? But it's the people that own it.

They come from, like, the next door farm and lock it up. It was great. I got to swim. Every morning, and apart from the first day when my sister followed me in, I had it to myself. Helen, that's incredible. Nobody else wanted to swim. No one else. Everyone wanted to swim, but everyone wants to, like, be by themselves.

So, like, everyone was like, I remember once I got out of the pool and I saw my dad, like, literally was clearly watching me come out. And then he, like, ran to it and looked behind him for my sister. And they're like, right? It's like, come on, Michael, are you in your 70s. It was like, you shouldn't be this afraid of your child. Well, you guys are kind of scary. I know, I get it. We're fucking terrifying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hi, Dad! Yeah, you're more vulnerable in the water, I get it. If I didn't think the older I got, the more scared I would be of you guys. I, we didn't go bowling, though. We had a very chill. It could still be Christmas.

Monkey World was a thing. Well, then, what are you talking about? You've done the Christmas stuff. It's bowling or monkeys. Everybody knows. What day did you go to Monkey World? 27th of December. Sure.

Where is it? Dorsat. Was that where you were staying? Yeah. Okay, and why? Why monkey world? Oh, I know the answer to this. It's a world of monkeys.

Yeah, and Marianne wanted to go there? Yeah. Yeah. And my dad. Was it nice? It was, oh my God. I think I cried about eight. It's awful.

Have you been, Andrew? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's devastating, isn't it? You cried because they weren't being, well. Well, they're all rescues. No, no, they're being taken care of really well. They've got tragic backstories, all of them. Oh, my God.

So many with Exma. Awful. Those, those aren't the stand-up ones for me, but yeah, yeah. Loads of them, most of them have been rescued from the L'Oreal testing centre, I'd say, was the majority. Yeah, and lots of like, they're still testing on the animal. Not in England anymore. But, yeah, oh, so many were used as photographers, props. I've got some of the stories.

Do you mean to read them out? That sounds like a laugh a minute. Please do. Oh, Helen, please don't. Sorry, I just realized what you're asking. No. No. Helen, no.

Helen, stop. Well, were the ones with Exmo rescued from Exma or they did it just happen to have XMA? One of them, I think they tried so many different. on him and now he's still got eczema. Wait, I thought they were supposed to not be testing on animals. No, no, back in the day. They've been, their rescues, they're all rescues. Wait, no.

It's not sad. Okay. You're going to love this one. Okay, this is, this one's called Seamus, who's a chimpanzee. Shamus? Yeah, yeah. Shameus. He was born in 1999.

You ready for this? Shamus? Yeah, Seamus. Oh my God, I love him. One below, it was called Butch. How is Seamus? Shamus and Butch, these are my kind of monkeys. Next?

Ready, Shamus's story. I'll just read the beginning part. Seamus was born after his mother Cherry removed her birth control implant Yes, Cherry, your body, your choice, girl. They do. And then Cherry was clearly like, oh, come on a boy!

Wow! I will have my air! Gave birth to say, oh my God, look at Butch. Okay, Butch is from Spain and Butch was used as a photographer's prop. is that is butch's story that she used to be a model i'm not going to read the whole thing they're very sad okay let's focus again come back to me come back to me come back to me think of sad do you know a film i watched over the break with ellen okay this one was in the jungle book movie that's pretty

cool carly okay carly was captive born for entertainment industry and appeared in the jungle book movie trained as a television actor he would be taken away from his mother at birth carly worked in turkey making a television series helen why are you acting like you weren't they You've already read these. Can we focus on the podcast? You wanted to be good of podcasting this year? Can we just do it? Yeah, sorry, just a shout out to Monkey World.

Big shout out. Just down the road from the Tank Museum. From the what museum? From the Tank Museum? No, it's not. By pool? Bovington Tank Museum is right next to the Monkey World, yeah. Well, then why the fact they're going to Monkey World

when I could have gone to the Tank Museum? Well, made a day of it, to doublehead her. Damn it. Sorry. I love tanks. How many tanks I got? Oh, shit, Tom. Like 100?

More. Helen? Can we focus? Thank you so much. What film did I watch? Thank you for asking. What film did you watch? It was beaches.

Okay. It was so sad. But I loved it. The Bett Midler. Yes. Glenn Close? No, no Glenn Close. Somebody else.

Share. Barbara. Streisand. No, Barbara. Shepherd, question mark. Beaches. What is her name? Hershey.

Hershey. Hershey. No, I didn't know who she was either, but wow. If you want to cry, that's your film. Go and have a big old. Watch this then? In the post-Christmas period, in the post-New Year's and Christmas period, because we went to Ireland and then we came back to Ellen's parents' house and they were away and we just went on big walks.

And I was outside for so much and it was heaven on earth. And then we watched films and we watched drag race and it was just great. It was delightful. You went full countryside, I know this. I loved it. I loved it. I loved it. I loved it. I love it so much. Do you think we've always loved it or do you think it is just part of being in our 30s now that we're like nature is healing? I unfortunately think it's part of aging.

I am suddenly like This is so good for myself You know what I love? Watching the season change Isn't it gorgeous? Isn't it gorgeous? It's so lovely I feel really like I'm coming back to myself

I was listening to a I was listening to a radio show That was literally talking about women walkers And I was like I'm finding this so related But then I was like Barf who am I being Yeah slap her in the face

Let's go Go back indoors But I had a gorgeous time I would actually love to be sent The radio show about women walkers It's beautiful It's beautiful I'd love to have a listen

It's beautiful. It might have been on women's hour. I'll send it to you. Would you recommend like popping in the headphones, obviously with wires and listening to that whilst on a walk? Not with wires. We can do this. We can be in the world.

We're of the world. We simply also enjoy nature and its restorative qualities. Oh my God. It's so lovely. Tell you what I like. What? Gross. Well, Ellen was, this is how I'm really old.

Ellen was reading a book about the gulag over Christmas because she's fun. What is the Russian gula? Yes. Slay. And one of the prisoners. wrote this memoir and described this, don't say sleigh. Why have you said slay after Gulag? Because I got it.

It's like it's nice when you know a word. No, you have to explain that. Otherwise, it's just gone from Gulag to slay. Okay, obviously Gulag not slay. Bad. Bad gulag. Please. Can we clarify?

Yes. Yeah. Oh, I've kind of lost the thread. Oh, that's what it was. I forgot that this is our dynamic. Am I bad at remembering things or is everything I say a challenge just to get through? simply that he described snow as creaking underfoot and I thought

well Ellen thought and then said to me and I agreed Snow does creak does wow oh my god am I a thousand years old do we have to wrap up Catherine we can wrap up the podcast if I'd broken the internet I'm so sorry I'm so boring I'm following you my sensible walking shoes

and when I stick socks I'm just a couple of years behind just waving wait for me Helen Ellen's mom got me running socks of a quality I've never had before my life and honest to God when I put them on of a morning I think this is living this is fucking living

pat it heel in a sock yes please because it hurts it hurts from the bottom of your heel so yeah nature's healing time is aging we're changing I you know what we should get into nature more this year do you want to go to Richmond Park

with me for a big walk I love Richmond Park I know but I love Richmond Park it's where I did my first ever 10k when I was getting to know the city of London by doing 10Ks. Okay, I will once again say walk. Yeah, no, no, walk. With all the deer, I'd love to.

Yes, with the deer. Also, I grew up at the Phoenix Park, which is full of deer. Richmond Park is very, like, I love it. Yeah, I'd love to. We are organising a walk. Let's go. I'm so sorry to jump in. I'd love you to have this sort of restorative moment together,

but just from a producer point of view, like, to make the podcast tick, you can't have that much inner piece. It would ruin the dynamic. Are you a fucking joking? Yeah. I'm so sorry. So you don't want us to have a nice life. I do, I do, but with.

No, you honestly miserable to line your little pockets, Andrew. We're already better women. Yeah. We are better women. Speaking of, I'm absolutely obsessed with a new year.

Andrew can't ruin my inner peace. I will not fail this year. I'm looking hate men. I can't stand the guy. Also, we get it. It's a pattern. You love it. Get a new shirt.

You know? Oh, women can enjoy nature. Sorry, Andrew. What do you want us to enjoy? Barbies and makeup and two heels. I went high heels. I actually love your shirt and I regret it.

No, don't be that girl. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't quite like it though. Okay. With your paeas? In our faces! What?

I don't know. I'm just, I'm spitballing. You've got to be better being queer. Here's the thing. Yes, the new year. Do you love it? I'm obsessed with it. I don't like New Year's Eve,

although I did actually have a good New Year's Eve. What did you do this year? We did not talk on New Year's Eve. We were meant to come back to London. Didn't. And then Charlie had transpired also hadn't gone back to London. It was up the road in Oxfordshire and her boyfriend had come to visit. So they came over for like an adult sleepover.

they at one point changed into their glamorous PJs it was so cute we made a spicy mushroom lasagna sorry Andrew it's from Motelangi and we all loved it delicious very therapeutic to cook that too sorry did you pick the shrooms yourself

from Waitrose Isles yes it was the local shop I would never usually go there but it was divine fuck you Andrew yeah they were dried and not dried Puccini yeah you put the hot water around it yeah we rehydrated them

something I didn't do to my 30. Something you can look forward to. I loved it. Fucking joining the human race. Yeah. Sorry, man. Anyway,

that was divine. Why didn't you go shopping? Punky fish? Oh, my God. What was that shop? That kids used to shop in. I never always wanted to go. Was it punky fish?

Was it closed before it was lost? No, it was in cactus. Back closed before Andrew was born. Punky. It's still online. They've still got an online shop. Yeah, well, why do you go? Well, why don't you freaking Google it?

WW. You told him. You fucking told him. With your TikToks and your twatters. I think our inner piece is just fine. And by that I mean, not really there. But yes, all of this is to say that I absolutely love the new year. Helen, it's my favorite.

I'll tell you why. It just has the best quality of new year, new pencil case, new me. The speed with which I will happily abandon my old self, i.e. yesterday's Catherine. is like I'm like you want to give me a gateway out of my life I will take it I feel invigorated I also feel like for the first time in ages I actually did stop at Christmas so I feel like I've had some time to reflect and I know what I wanted the year You full stopped I full stopped I thought that's what news I so often have just

fucking tumbled into the next year and being like wait I have to do what else now and this time I feel like oh yeah I had a pause I had a moment I know what the year looks like it's very busy but it's very exciting and I just want to take care of myself I feel very inspired to be nice to myself and to also do you have new year's resolutions are you a resolutions gal um i've manner oh we do this every this must be our fourth year of talking about i'm i'm new years that's my holiday and i've done manifestation board for the second year talk me through it um and then um what comedy festival would we like to close down this year of it was it was this one like the 28th 29 i got out no

i did it on new year's eve i did it on the 31st nice and um before i went to a part of I went to a party because I'm still like, you know, I'm still younger than Catherine. Yeah. And then what I did is I got out last year's ball because I used to have it hanging up and then someone said, no, that's private. And I was like, oh, okay, so I put it away. Who said no, that's private? I can't remember one of my friends who's a bit witchy was like.

Well, you hang it up in your room though. Yeah, yeah, but they were like, no, no, no, no. Like, it's just, it's for you. Like, you don't need to have it out for people to see and sort of like, do you know what mean because like our flat is like there's nowhere to go yeah and they were like no no you just have it for you like under something I was like okay interesting so I hadn't seen it in a while they took it out and I could see everything I didn't do I am oh no so confident and ambitious each year you have to be you got to shoot for the stars that's good so it was like go to Montreal but that festival

got cancelled it was like that's not on you have great relationships with everyone find love hear your relationship with food 100% like there's just so many things where I was like Okay, that's insane. It was going to be like a big year. But I did quite a bit. You did load. Can you, wait, you just tell me what you didn't do. Tell me what you did do.

Yeah, those things. What you did do? I think I did have a great family relationships this year. I think I did amazing steps healing my relationship with food. Hell yeah. I also kept doing therapy and that was something that was on it. I think I did some good work. Yeah, you did.

Not, it wasn't my biggest work here because I was doing personal stuff, okay? Yeah. And then there were loads of stuff I did that weren't on my board. And I was like, that's very impressive. So the new board, charming it is yellow polka dots. Cute. Cute. Cute.

I've never heard that word barked before. Yite. Oh, it's so fun being back, isn't it? Yeah. Loving it. My inner piece slipping away. Can we get some of that outdoors soon? Could you bring a plant closer and you just touched my skin with the skin.

The plan. Oh, sorry, I was like I said, I released the, the Manchester live recording for patrons. And I don't know whether Colin did this in the tech booth at Froggin Bucket. Your microphone is like half the volume of Catherine's. I love that so much because in the green room, same tech, Colin. Helen kept being like, we're best friends, Colin. And he was like, okay. He is my best friend.

Colin, the tech at Manchester Froggin' Bucket is my best friend. No, he's not. He is, he is. He's an enigma. I love him. ain't your best friend. I love him. I think he's the funniest man.

He's so funny. But it does only matter if you know him. So back to this story. I do know him. We've met over three times. Okay. Four times.

Yellow polka dot. Stay with me on message. Stick with me. Yeah, he made a manifestation board. I had lovely New Year's. I went to my friend's flat, which overlooks like the River Thames. So I had like the perfect view with a London eye.

Oh my God. For fireworks. For fireworksies. Cool. And it was just really good. But I love New Year's. And then New Year's morning. I'm still waiting.

on your resolutions you're mad of us yeah resolutions i just need to keep you on my love you so much no i know sorry sorry no that's you're doing so great no sorry sorry sorry no no no okay um keep so it's basically all based around and you say it's about cringing like love and respect for yourself yeah so it's like i'm not doing things because it's like it's not good to do them but just sort of like rewarding myself for like so it's like continuing with the food stuff which if you listen on Patreon you'll know a lot more about bingy and recovery stuff but um keeping that up so like doing more shops i already did um i went to the special deli yesterday nice and got like a special mail in being more like um excited to move my body but not like you've got

to do an exercise video because you said you do one every day so like stuff like that um i love that okay i haven't smoked in six days but i don't want anyone to message me about it because the more I talk about it, the more I really want to have a cigarette. Yeah, well done. I'm just going to say, well done. That's a really fucking hard thing. Six days. Well done.

Helen, I'm really proud of you. Six days. I'm really proud of you. Because it's like getting off the mother's teeth is what they say. Yeah. Do you want mine instead? No, because I've been on San Niels, remember? I think of that picture.

You did not send me that picture and I'm fine with that. I sent it to Ellen. Damn it! And also, career-wise this year, biggest year ahead of me, biggest year. Is it? Yes, Ellen. his idea.

Because it's leaving space for the biggest year to walk through your door. I'm going on tour. I'm going to buy a flat. I'm going to be in a movie. I'm going to sell a Disney film. We don't know what movie yet, do we? This is just part of it. Listen, I don't know. The board is

ambitious. But then I was like, but I, one of my things I really like about myself is how ambitious and like, what's it called? optimistic I am There's no point being like Well I'm not gonna shoot for the stars Because I'm I've always thought of my

A bit Oscar Wildy I always think of the two of you The same breath too We're all in the gutter In that I would also buy you carnation Are uh huh Joking They're the worst flower

Oh I've got a lesbian joke for you Oh great I cannot wait for that Apparently it's a classic I thought Christmas with the family was over Oh no damn I've got a lesbian joke for you What go on

Apparently it's a classic But I never heard it before. Is it what did the lesbian bring to the first date? No, what's that one? A you-ho. That's good because we're moving in fast. Okay, mine's similar. Okay, what's worse than two girls running with scissors?

Oh, God. I don't know. Two girls scissoring with the runs. Hasn't gone down great in the room Oh no Did I make a mistake Don't tell that to anybody else No one else

And specifically never say that to a woman you fancy Okay Okay Look at me Look at me She's deeply uncomfortable And a horrified I don't know

She's laughing I think she's so Look at her face She's so perturbed Yeah but look at her actual face she's so obsessed. Oh, are you upset? I'm sorry. Yeah, she's horrified. I've got some sugar-free poloises you'd like to. Don't say that to anyone that you fancy ever, okay? Okay. Do we cut it? Did I make a big mistake? No, we don't cut it, but we, because we learn, we're learning.

Yeah. But we don't say that to a woman we ever hope to have sex with. Okay. Okay. Killed with the bowers. I'll bet it did. You do like it. No, I don't. I'm laughing at the bowers. like it because of course they do. The straightest environment one could be. We're all like, we like poo jokes.

I know, baby girl. I know, baby girl. I know. Sorry, Catherine. No, that's okay. You could have really like, you know what? You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Oh, wow, it really is the new year. We're just saying shit. We're just saying shit and throwing it off the wall.

My, um, I've had a very similar sort of prerogatory. I literally cannot get. Helen, what did we talk about last year that we're going to take into this year? Asking new questions? Yeah, yeah. Do you... So we've done your New Year's resolution.

Oh, what are your New Year's resolution? Thank you for asking naturally, Helen. I'm so sorry. You know, I will be... I will do better this year. I really will. We are two adult women having a definitely human conversation. conversation we're practicing it's hard katherine somebody did point out to me that apparently when

they've noticed on the videos that when you know i won't like something you don't look at me when you're saying it which is so funny given your line on stage most often is look at me it's very funny that you just look away um thank you for asking i've had a very similar approach to the new year with just being kind to myself my like sort of themes or like hopes for the year to be brave and grateful brave and grateful I want to be more outside of my comfort zone but also very grateful for everything I have we talked about brave

do you remember like July last year we had a big conversation because you and I are very quick to be like the safe thing to do would be overthinking it yeah and also like we you know have to be our own support system it's totally reasonable to be like well what is the safest about

money wise blah blah blah but also I'm going to try to be brave and I'm going to try to be grateful and similarly I have minor about like not so much respecting I guess like trusting myself yeah so like instead of everything being like starting over again

like always in the new year I'm always like I want to get fit and I was like or hang on I am a fit person I can trust that I have exercised before and I can trust that I will exercise again because I've never not so just like breathe I don't need a rigid regime I can just crack on with doing what I do

because I like to do it because I want to move your body because I actually enjoy it not because I said I had to do same thing as you was like because I said today I was going to do blah blah blah blah and um I would like to save a bit more money that is one thing I do need to be more careful with money than I have been being but that's okay I have decided to do that in fun ways yeah so yesterday I made a different I'm really into lasanias at the

moment but a different lasagna so different it would honestly rock your world can you talk me through it because I made a lasagna recently and I looked doing it was but in a squash sauce like as in you like a becheamau? roast it and then you mix it with milk and nutmeg and cinnamon and allspice and a little bit of brown sugar and that's your like yeah that's it's going to function as your tomato sauce and then it's roasted veg and a ricotta sauce as well the cheese is ricotta and egg and lots of black pepper and it was honestly it slapped it's slapped but what i was making it that's that's fucking brave to do a different lasagna recipe when you know ones at work thank you that's actually

fucking brave and you know what else what it was honestly there was a moment when I was making it where I smelled the I just blended up all the and you know the way a lasagna because you're cooking

for like eight dinners it costs a lot more than just making a pasta dish you're like oh god so it has to work because it's like oh no well I was making it

and I blitzed up this recipe for the sauce and then it smelled honestly like Christmas popery it was so much cinnamon and nutmeg and I was like

fuck I fucked it I was like you weren't grateful for it terrible I was panicking. I was like, I've been too brave. I've really, I've fucked it. I've fucked it.

I've been too brave already. This is crazy. I've gone over the edge. Put it in the oven, came out. Tasted delicious. It totally mellowed out in the oven. So, very glad I didn't throw it away. But that's a lesson in bravery again.

Brave, okay, brave and grateful. Those are really nice ones. Yeah, I think I have to be a bit braver and a bit more. Well, because I've been very scared. And actually, every time I've taken a big old gamble, especially the last year. No, that was the other great thing that happened was the other day Ellen and I were in the park

and she took a cute picture of me but I just had my hair tucked back because I was in a hood and you could just see like to hear of my hair like to my chin yes and I looked so bad I was like oh it's so nice early in the year to get that you know that's not for me that's not for me I'm not a bob girl I never will be it's not for my face shape thank you so much to the

reminder universe amazing to know oh my god well I've done it before so I know it but your body somehow your brain forgets what you know intuitively which is that not everyone's meant to have a bob and my other reflection on this last year, if I may. My big takeaway is not everyone's art collection

warrants a gallery wall. Willing to go further into that? Yes. I've just, I've been walking a lot and consequently, you know, when you go by, everyone in winter has their lights on and proceed? And I just, I'm just going to say it, not everyone's meant to have a bob,

and not everyone is meant to have a gallery wall. I don't have the art for a gallery wall. That's fine. What have you seen? I've just seen a lot of gallery. wall lately and I just I just don't think everyone's collection warrants that I'm just gonna say that it's just if it's all prints of people that you don't know who they are if you don't know where it came from and then like eight of some ants it's not it's okay to just like there's an ant

wall somewhere no not ants no as in like your auntie oh right oh what to say like if someone had a wall actually be kind of intriguing I'd be intrigued yeah no that particularly if they use the ones from a bug's life because you know them like I said Not everyone's art collection, Warren's... The gallery, well, you didn't know! Oh, the adult Disney fans are going to come for you. Blake, what's the two princess?

They've already come for us. And the other one, who's the... You've made your point. Should we do a problem? Cutter's the cricket. Or the... Yeah. But that was good.

Should we do a problem? We should find out the name with this print... I'm sorry. I'm sorry, could we just quickly fill in the name with this adult princess Anne and then we'll do the problem. I'm trying. but I just keep getting Bugs Live versus ants discourse.

Okay, well, we don't need that. No, I know. We don't need that, Andrew. Princess Atter. Atter, thank you. So close. Were you just a dot? Dot's her sister, younger sister.

Yeah. Okay, pretty close. Thank you everyone. Sorry, Catherine. No, no. Catherine, would you like to do anything? Yeah, go on them. I'm so glad you're keeping us in track.

Thank you. Oh, and Andrew, how was your Christmas and New Year's? It was very good. It was very uneventful, quite chill. Thank you. You're welcome. What was the gayest present? You got, Andrew?

The shirt and I'm currently wearing. If you can't see, you can't see it, but if you could see, I said earlier, and I think it's true, it's giving, uncle's got a new boyfriend. Yes, yeah. And he directs, maybe amateur theatre and I'm so here for him. You know, actually, we were Googling Amdram the other day. Me and Reese were involved in local. Anyway, we've got two problems, both about mums, which mum problem appeals to you most.

Mum, spending too much money, mum wanking. Wanking, obviously mum wanking. Okay. I don't even know why I asked. Immediately. That's not even, that's a choice. Yeah. Come on.

This is from Elle. Hi, Elle. With so many options, why choose Arizona State University? For me, the only online option was ASU because of the quality. Their faculty was really involved with their students and care about your personal journey. The dedication to my personal development, from my professors, that's been extremely valuable to me. Earn your degree from the nation's most innovative university.

Online. That's a degree better. Explore more than 350 plus undergraduate, graduate and certificate programs at ASUonline.asu.edu. Hey, hogs. Don't watch. Could you imagine? Thank you for keeping it real with the trauma of Christmas, past, present, and future. Unfortunately for you, it means you're the first place I turn. to as I lie in my bed at almost midnight on the 27th of December, counting the hours until

my mum finally leaves, to the sound of her wanking. At your house, Elle? You're not even at her house? The exact wording is, it fills my home. The sound of her wanking feels my home. Let's just celebrate all sexuality. No. No. I think everyone has the right to flick their own bean. Well, that's what Elle says. Don't get me wrong, we all deserve a little pleasure. but in your daughter's house with the door open

and making moans that have me questioning if she's potentially snuck someone five floors up down to I can't understand that sentence but put it simply I want to die

I've coughed played your podcast very loudly and even gone and flush the toilet but she continues yeah she's focused how do I look her in the eye tomorrow how do I burn my spare room to the ground how do I not think of this every time I close my eyes?

I know we should all be a little bit kinder to our mothers as they're only human too. But I've already reverted into a bratty 12 year of this Christmas and I fear this has pushed me too far. Thank you for everything. Your loyal hog, L. Number one, I have a story to tell all of you as soon as we finished recording this podcast just to know nothing to do with my mother. But just so you know, I've got a good one.

Number one, L, you've already lived it because as of right now, it is January the 6th so you've survived that now personally for me can he stop a wanker burn the she you think burn the sheets first step you ask her to

you ask her to take the sheets with her or first of all step number one 28th I hope this is what happened 28th you say mother dear if you leave the door open I can hear you wanking it's very upsetting please stop I don't necessarily wish that you stop wanking though if you have

to do it please do it with the door closed secondly are you leaving great please strip the bed and you know what you can have those sheets and or pop them in the wash and i will put on a hot wash and then when you leave i will probably throw them away but that's fine thirdly you say and by the way is this a thing for you like do you need me to hear because i don't want to participate in that or do you just know or do you just not no sorry this is actively seeking attention she's no you do not you do not do it with the door open when there's obviously sounds coming from elsewhere, except that you

want the attention, and that is non-consensually having me involved in your fucking perversion. I want no part of it. Perversion! Yeah! It is perverted to wank with the door open when your adult daughter, who has, by the way, hosted you for Christmas, what more do you want from me? I'm sorry, that's sick and wrong, and she's

doing it on purpose, and I fucking hate it. I hate it, and I'm sorry, but I would be saying it to her face, like she made you deal with it, I would make her deal with it, and I would be sending those sheets to the bin and I probably would turn the mattress if I didn't get a new one. I don't think you need to say all that. And I hope she's like, you do. I think honest, but don't you honestly think like just the next morning to say to your mum,

mum, really awkward by I heard you last night and I found it really awkward and embarrassing. Could you not do that while I'm like next door? I think that's all you need to say. We're saying the same thing except I'm saying with an adult voice and you're saying with baby voice. Yeah, because you can't say like, strip the sheets. You've got to be like, mum, I heard you. No, I wouldn't say strip the sheets in that moment. I'd say, by the way, can you chuck the sheets in the wash?

Yeah. But that would already be implied as to why, because previously I would have said, hey, mom, last night you left the door open when you were wanking. It's not on purpose? I think other option, just so they've got options. You want me to do a baby voice while I talk to wanking with my mother. You're right. We're on the same page.

But another option could be like get one of those really small vibrators that makes it happen faster. Just so. Other option. Your mother is now. longer invited to your home as you would having one organza you would never let if somebody else came to your house hang on hang on hang on no i haven't obviously not i just wanted to say if you'd react helen sorry if a friend came to your house left the door open and had a loud wank a friend with whom you already kind of have a fractious history you're not inviting them to say over

again you're not no it would be mad yeah so same rules apply mommy dearest and i don't need to be kinder to her. It sounds like she's like she's been plenty kind to herself.

Do you think the mom like like, like, do you think the right and think the mom like

enjoys being like heard? Yes, I do. I just don't think you leave the door open for that. I'm sorry.

You've got to then that's got to be like a like, like do you remember that thing that people used to do at school when it was like

the call a danger wank. The only thing that makes you remember this the danger. Yeah, yeah. The only,

mom, mom, mom, mom! And then you had to finish and cover up before your mom opened the door and then if she came in you'd be like I'm going to change I didn't do it I didn't do it but I know I know boys that did is what I'm saying

sorry that's disgusting that was really that was way too visceral sorry that was like really that was I felt like that was all happening in the room and I felt very uncomfortable um sorry Catherine which is why I can know what I know what Elle feels like and if I can to say one more thing the only thing in your mother's

defence that makes me think that she wasn't doing it to be heard is that it was midnight I do think the elderly think midnight is like Spooksville and everyone's sleeping

no one could possibly be awake at midnight that's the only only thing I will say but she still needs to know that midnight is a time that other adults might in fact rise

from their slum and overhear her getting herself off in a crazy crazy levels of noise that's the only I will give her that one

concession. Midnight for the over 65s is basically four in the morning. They cannot conceive of someone staying awake to that time. Yeah. And that's all I'll say on. But I, and I'm sorry I happened to you and huo from me. Gross.

What a Christmas to remember, Elle. I, what a Christmas to fucking forget, Elle. She's never invited again. You're going to have, yeah. Imagine, you're coming to mine for Christmas? Get it. It's so awkward. Coming at mine for Christmas.

love to hear from the mum obviously coming like coming orgasming just like a letter to be like oh I can't stop wanking at my daughter's house what do I do like maybe she heard it to the podcast through the walls and now listens to us if you do hello we always love to have new listeners

do you think that the people listen to the podcast hear my jokes or oh we don't even turn your mic on it's just a stream of hell yeah what's is really wrong what did I do wrong nothing is just sometimes jokes are a good metric to check if you are listening when I'm talking more

if you're just waiting for your turn and the answer is just waiting for your turn don't worry you're so cute you're so cute and you got a little pesto on your jumper from our tomato spill earlier and you're so cute and you're so nice and it's nice that you're trying to be nice to Elle's mom sorry Elle's mom

no no you don't have to apologize your turtle neck through the jumpers very nice yeah you look cute You look like a Power Ranger aesthetic. You look like a Power Ranger aesthetic. No, I don't. Okay. I don't know what you want.

No. You look like Bill and Ben. Because you've got flowers in your ears. Look at the flower pop men. Bill and Ben, the flower pop man. I've never heard of them. You look beautiful and perfect in 100, 10 out of 10. Thank you, so do you.

Okay, shall we wrap it up? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, good. We don't want to get too raunchy. So somebody's mom could be listening to this while they wank. If you are, hold your breath, I'll be faster. No, stop it, stop it, stop it. Stop it.

Oh, boy. Stop it. Stop it. You guys, you guys, thank you so much to our exact producers and to our producers. We're going to do a shout out to our exec first to say thank you so much for supporting us on Twesty Horks. That was actually really good. Okay, thank you to our exec producers, Guy Goodman, Simon Moore's, and Tony Tona, Stephanie Gottsia,

Oliver's Diego, Anthony Conway, near Redmond's side of Kishmore. Hey, I'm walking here. You guys get that I'm too tired to keep fighting, right? I'm just sorry. Also, thank you to our producers. L. Richard Bald, Harold Van Dyke, Tim and Dom, David Walker, Rachel R. Claire, Owen Jones.

Jess and Nick Sair and Molly Ria Fing Cordelia, Rachel Page, Helen A, Tina Lindsay, Amy O'Reardon, Abby Worf, Matt Sims, Luke Bright, Leah, Kate, Liz, Fours, Taz, Anthony, Chloe, Are you doing a... What are you doing while I'm... I'm waiting for you to read all the names and I'm going to go, eh. Stop punching the air.

So I needed to get the names up so I can follow along. Becky Fox, Dean Michael, Sophie Chivers, maybe chivers, Carrie Soothes, Charlie A, KC, Jam Rainward, Tamsin Smith Harding, Hannah J, Ezra Peregrin, Laura Pollock, Leah Overend, Stephen Chicken, Dougie Robertson,

cute name, Haley Singer. Guys, honestly, thank you so much for supporting the podcast. We couldn't do it without you. We are so grateful. and this is the end of the thanks for Patreon and also the end of any plugs that we might want to make about Patreon it's the end of everything

this is the end, that's the end of it.