Trusty Hogs - Ep176. PHIL WANG / Skiing, Skin Care & Stand-Up Specials

Episode Date: March 6, 2025

The proud owner of not one but TWO Trusty Hogs appearances (and also two Netflix specials, I guess), we welcome back the hilarious and brilliant PHIL WANG!FOLLOW PHIL: @WangPixNEW MERCH: www.trustyhogs.com/merchThank you so much for listening!Support us at www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)All links: https://audioalways.lnk.to/trustyhogsSNThank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Stefanie Catracchia / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Neil Redmond / Angela S / Sadie Cashmore / Sarah DeakinPRODUCERS: Elle / Richard Bald / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Claire Owen-Jones / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate / Liz Fort / Taz / Anthony / Klo / Becky Fox / Dean Michael / Sophie Chivers / Carey Seuthe / Charley A / KC / Jam Rainbird / Tamsyne Smith-Harding / Ezra Peregrine / Bryn / Laura Pollock / Leah Overend / Steven Chicken / Hayley Singer / Dougie RobertsonWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Helen, it's episode 176 of Trustee Hogg. You're sick and I'm emotional. I mean, what's changed? That's right. I'm rocking a very sexy post-flu voice. This is, for the listener, episode 176 of Trustee Hoggs, the podcast about our perfect lives.

Obviously, occasionally my perfect body will fall sick with perfect flu, but it's really cute and don't worry about it. And we're here to answer all of your listener problems. For context, this weekend was Lester. Helen and Andrew had to do it without me because I was so ill and thank you for doing it. How was it? It was. It went. What? The amount of messages I got from listeners being like, we heard you have meningitis. Mingingitis. Damn it. Okay. Well, they- Mingingitis. I told everyone Catherine

had mingingitis because that's funny. They said you had meningitis. Well, no, actually, to be fair, on reflection, I might have misread that because no part of me would have assumed mingingotis was the word. So maybe I should reread the messages. I was very ill when I received all the abuse. So let me just triple check those. It's so funny to say someone's sick and they go, what with? And you go, Ming, enjoy this.

That is just objectively funny. Helen, that's funny. Through the fog. Step forth the trusty hogs. Yeah, you're going to give them your problems and they will solve them. Or maybe they won't. And that's your problem. they'll have guests

and Andrew White on the tech oh it's Helen and Catherine and the trusty hogs trust the trusty hogs or maybe not Also by the way if you're listening to this episode

and you're not watching the episode Fair play old school good for you What I'll say is this Helen Barrow's never looked better You might be emotional But you're dressed like La Dolte Avita You're wearing like Is this a body suit

this leopard print this no it's just a top it's so hot and then you have your new joanie dress on which honest to god was like made for your tip it's like we get sponsored by joanie we both lose our minds and now i'm like i meant to wear this 24 seven no but actually their stuff suits so well it's so nice and it's so comfortable and everything has pockets i know i feel like everyone's being paid for this part everything just has pockets and fits well everything fits well it's super size inclusive and also like you know you've done good with the sponsor because Emma Black rang me and she was like I didn't know about Joni and now I'm losing my mind on my website. That's so funny. Georgie messaged me was like my award is already 80% Joni. How may I only finding it you have a discount and I was like we only

just got it. What the hell? So yes we approve this message. I feel girly and I love it. I feel girly also I'm really glad to have some clothes um at a discount because well on honest to God all I've been wearing his pajamas um but oh my god I've been so grossly sick. We need to get into it. I have like backache from all the sitting like around that I've had to do. I got so sick that I am bored of television that has never ever happened to me. You know and you're like I have nothing left to watch. I'm fucking sick of it. That never happens to me. I've had that once but only with flu. It sucks. I I can't remember being bored before like in in such a long time I've been yeah I was really really really sick and and it's so it's so sweet because Ellen bless her.

like we have a very clear divide and hers is not cooking and she's been so sweet like but I can just tell like it stresses her every time she has to cook for me she just looks a bit like oh god yeah okay so what do you want you soup and bread soup and bread and she's like going up and bread soup and bread soup and bread so cute but she does look stressed and um is she making the soup from scrap oh god no no no oh she's stressed about the eating sweet angel doesn't go in that kitchen Do we count this, okay, just for perspective for our male listeners, if a man couldn't do that, you would not be sweet angling him. But she goes, she does everything.

Like she does all the DIY, she does all the bins, she does all the shopping, like she does all the, the man's jobs. Like the stuff that I don't want to do. I don't want to do. She's so good. Anyway, listen, she has been making me, she's made such an effort and she's gotten better. The soups have gotten more evolved over the week. Talk to me.

We're now in the like itzu broth territory where she fries vegetables and puts them in the soup and and noodles and the soup and prawns in the soup so very impressive and she has been taking good care of me I'm just fucking useless at being sick all I have is guilt about the money I'm losing also there could not have been a worst week sorry to moan everyone but there couldn't have been

so for context right if you're a comedian there are weeks where I could have been sick and genuinely made money because I wouldn't be paying to go do to do gigs where I was losing money I got sick on a week where I lost so much money I missed

Ellen's premiere of her Bong Joon How film and I missed doing I don't know if I'm a lie to say this but a TV show that I've never been booked for before I was booked for and I had to miss it and I'm so gutted and I feel really like fuck and I feel like I was like feeling bad about the money feeling bad about letting my agent down feeling bad about letting Ellen down feeling bad like disappointed and also I forgot this element because it's been a

whilst and I've been this sick of like I missed three two tours three tour shows and then trusty hug show. Well, just to be clear, trusty hugs, you're still being paid for. Oh my God, yes, yes, yes. Sorry, that's actually something that I realized was like such an unbelievable gift because in this job, we don't have sick pay. Like, so when you miss a job, you lose

the money. Apart from trusty hugs. Thank you, trusty hugs. But what I also realize is like, if you're sick with most jobs, I assume you tell your boss and then the boss is like, oh, that's a bummer, we'll get someone to cover you. And then everyone's like, they're sick. I guess

they tell them in the office. In comedy most people are so nice and I've had so many lovely adorable hogs be like get better soon feel better and that's so sweet but you do why am I nervous but you do also obviously you've like by not showing up to a gig you've let like it's not like you've let down like a team of five you've let down like maybe 200 people who were going to go to your show and so some of those people will message you and yeah and I just had this week in particular it's been one of those weeks where I've had like the most honestly like quite like like my wife was looking forward to this so much and this was our big event and it's like you got like 12 hours now it is i don't know what to say like i'm i'm not

not going to work because i'm honestly it's so interesting how like how people will message you to be like somebody messaged me a man messes me to be like when i put up a thing being like oh i'm not feeling very well being like you better be better be better by lester and then being like are you serious and you better not be making ellen sick because i'm going to her show the next day and I was just like what is this what is this if this is meant to be funny it's like really not coming across anyway I've done a little bit of like soul searching this week and being like oh I've been feeling so guilty about it and then I was like it's just not making me any better that's not going to help either like who the fuck's meant you give me those names but it's such

a unique experience to this job where like you have real direct contact which is great right like it's so nice when someone's like hey your comedy means so much to me and you're like this is heaven on earth but also when it's like you ruined my night you are like oh man i wonder if maybe i would be nice if nobody had access to me to quite this directly so mixed bag yeah i mean a woman messaged me being like oh you're not a 99 club tonight and i was listed but i wasn't actually performing i hate i've been listed but i just gave her tickets to a show that's so nice and that was it but she's very nice i think that's the thing is people don't understand like sometimes you are listed for shows that you never

agreed to do and sometimes also just like but more than anything like sometimes you just get sick I really admire people who are like I haven't missed a day of work in 20 years no matter what I love to. See I did not admire that. No no no I think you have to. I respect it but I'm like but have you seen the have you seen is an old baby Maria Bamford's thing where she talks to the comedian who she's like

she was in a mental hospital and he's like I'd never missed a day of work in 20 years and she's like ah I couldn't really function or make sentences so I didn't think it'd be that funny and he was like yeah comedy sure has got to be funny and you're like where is the empathy here what's going on so like yeah i'm sick anyway as you can tell i'm very uncomfortable being sick so i go through all the like worst case scenarios of everyone thinking i'm a disaster but that makes it harder to get better oh i know i totally understand it's like oh no take the night to rest and it's like well i'm not resting

because instead i'm just up worrying about the fact that i'm like letting people down and then you're like no it's all in my head and then someone messages and you're like yes not in my head well this is the thing I'm like, it's all in my head, and then you get someone being like, you ruin my pregnant wife's week. Oh, she's pregnant? You bitch. She's pregnant. That's on you there.

You better believe she's pregnant. You better believe it. And you're like, yeah, so, oh God, really stressful. I don't like being sick, but I'll tell you what, I have gotten to watch some amazing television. I did watch Sophie Willans second series. Alma's not normal. Oh, my God, divine, divine, divine.

I watched it immediately when it came out. It's incredible. All of season four of hacks. Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble. Okay, I've got three. episodes left. Obsess. There isn't better television.

There is no better comedy on television. I'm like fundamentally. I just saw the golf caddy episode. Oh my fucking God. You wouldn't piss on me if I was a kid. It's so good. It's so good and so sexy. Do you think it's like better for us though because we're in comedy as women or do you

think it's just generally good? I think Christina Hendrix in a lesbian love scene in any context is good. I don't really care what the industry is. I don't really. I don't actually really need any context clues. It's like, did somebody say Christina Hendrick's. Hendricks is a lesbian, press play. Also, Jean Smart can do whatever the hell she wants.

No, I don't, maybe, but I don't think so. I think it's just goddamn good. I love the idea if you sit on the sofa with your hands up like a toddler and clapping. Press play. Christina Hendricks is a lesbian. Press play. Come on. That is it.

Ladies, gather. Genuinely, yes. There is that, what else did I watch in all of my TV watching? I've been, oh my God, I got into, you know, I'm at the dregs. I did American traitors. okay that apparently is incredible well actually here's my two cents i don't think it works with celebs i think and also i think fundamentally american people play reality tv competitions in a different way to british ones and i don't have as much interest in watching it this particular

season is better than the other ones i've seen bits of but and that's because i'm invested in the celebrities and that's because there are a lot of gays gabby windy hello Gabby Windy was the Bachelorette. Okay, amazing. And she was talking to one of the guys in this trader's house and he was like, oh, you were in The Bachelor? Like, how did that go? And she was like, I'm a lesbian now.

And I was like, I'm obsessed with this now. It's her and Chriselle. I knew Crishell was in it because I'm obviously, they're just prancing around dressed divinely, not really knowing what's going on. Incredible. The amount, but what bothers me about the... I'm the trader. What? Genuinely, that's what bothers me about this library says that some of them come in

so stern and it's like, but they don't, we know how the game works yeah they haven't done the research they know they got a fee and they're in ireland it's scotland um and then but what bothers me i think is that like somebody wrote this somewhere i can't remember where um i read it or maybe ellen told me but that basically like americans come in and like i'm gonna win and british people any competitor in the british traitors you could be convinced was on their way to asda and then got plucked out of their car and we're told that they're now on traders and they're like oh gosh okay but they're not like in it to win it's because we've got a culture of not saying that we want something but that makes for

much better it's so much funnier to watch a woman be like what's going on every time than to have someone who's like i'm gonna win this goddamn thing or else i'm not a man or an even more calculated way to watch someone who's like i don't care like whatever it's about friends and watch them slowly get more and more competitive and forget to do the dance of I'm easygoing. That's fun. That's my favourite type of reality TV. We're all best friends.

No, I really like her. I like her. I really like her. What became apparent on the ski trip we played Mafia a lot. And it's so funny because having watched Traders, I was like, I'd be so good at this game. No.

I am, I'd be terrible. Ellen did an impression of me in Mafia and it's me when I'm not the trader. or like the killer I'm like do to do I wonder who it is let's figure this out guys me when I am

is big is like hello everyone a fresh round is upon us is it let us come in you've got a different voice a full different voice

I'm so bad at it so I would be terrible anyway but yeah so I watched a lot of trash telly and I read Bluitts Maggie Nelson's book yes so good

and smart and I don't know that I understood what's going on like books like that where I'm like technically really good but what the fuck

so good and I know that Katie Wicks thinks it's brilliant so you know it's good and I loved Argonauts

but did I understand this not totally sure being left behind by a book is one of the loneliest feelings because it's just

you and the book and when the book goes like oh and these 10 clever things and you're like I'm wait Oh no, I'm actually, I'm in charge of the pace.

I was so close. I was so close. I think for the first 40 pages I was really keeping up. And then it changed form? Question mark as a form. Anyway, I was like, I'm lost. I'm so lost. There's Russian books where the characters have 10 different names.

And they just change the name they're using on them after four chapters. And you're like, please. But they're dead. You can't ask them to rewrite it. So you know what the thing is about the Russians? I feel like they know that you're going to get lost, so they spend so many pages describing the same thing that eventually you come back around, right?

You're like, they're like, let me do eight iterations of the same thing. Fine. With this, it's a real case of like three sentences is meant to be like a word, it is a universe of meaning, but can I access it? No. You, sometimes we just need easy books for simple guys. Yeah, and I do think I'm in in pursuit of one of those at the moment.

But I love to do. Okay, I've got some recommendations there. Very short. Simple books for simple girls. Yes, please. You come look at Helen's library. That would be nice. Oh my God.

Also, I did the new series of Love is Blind. How am I still watching? Okay, you have been. I'm not surprised. The drags. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. This is long, Catherine.

I know. I've just been sick for so many days. It has been because like, obviously, like, you're like, my god you're recording this after lester lester was two weeks ago we're like ahead of ourselves because our schedules are crazy at the moment like you've been sick for like two weeks i've been sick for two weeks and that and two days is too long for me so two weeks is boring it made me feel really like real empathy for people whose bodies don't do what they want them to do like god we're so lucky health is definitely such a priority but anyway all of that is to say do you want news of the

world or do you think if i told you about the world it would it would hurt because you'd feel like you know tell me how is it okay it's it's been chilly but today's been lovely and sunny and i feel like today was a good day for you to come out the cocoon for a couple of hours i honestly thought that when i when i came out my house today i was like you know what the sun shining there could be worse days for katherine to come out um lester was it was good it was just it's a lot of helen for the hogs who wasn't andrew also there andrew was there but helen was there right and i um you need some push back I really begged the hogs not to message you and say what happened.

Obviously, if you're a patron, you know what happened because the live is up. It was, like, I think about halfway through, I started begging the audience. Like, who's a Catherine? Who's a Catherine? I need someone to balance us out. And I think I got four problems, didn't solve a single one. I just looked these lesbians in the eye going, you're fucked. I can't help you.

Oh, gosh. It was, I did two hours of new material, one of which I brought a younger version of myself on stage just to be with her. Like, I, I'm telling you, I think I might. As a comedic choice or like a thing you learned there. Who knows? Who knows? Okay.

Okay. I was like, this could be a really funny comedic choice, but also it's like an interesting thing. And you could just see like people in the audience being like, okay, darling, okay, that's okay. Yeah, we see her too. And I'm like, and they're like, she's not there's an empty chair. That was really fun.

I missed you. It was weird because Andrew had four gigs to do on the day. That's too many gigs. But he's young and he's energetic and his knees don't click. Like, oh my God, my knees. Even when he's on the stairs? Never. His knees did not click.

Seriously. So I did two solo hours and then, oh my God, I did hear what I did do. I did watch Andrew's show. It was his last tour show and it was fucking. He's divine. He crushed so hard. How did the filming of your taping go? Oh my God, we've got so much just that.

I know. Thank you also to, thank you to everyone who came to see me at Lester and then came to see me doing Catherine. show at Leicester. Thank you for giving me grace with the accent. And yeah, plates. Could you imagine if I did that? I did. I'd be upset. But I filmed my old stand-up. That'll be coming to YouTube super soon. It was great. It was chaos. I filmed. Turtle Canyon. Who doesn't know. Yes. Nice. With lovely Nick and Al. And I, um, I filmed two specials in an hour. So good. Including a costume and curtain change. It's so good. I mean,

to be filming mine soon which we will keep you abreast of no I'm really working on it but obviously I got sick didn't I but I'm working on it so I'll have one real soon and then hopefully people will come I'm going to try to do an hour and a half a full record and then an hour and a half so I'm going to try to do because I want to do some half hour on each for warming up for myself but that'll be old material that I'll get in the can and then also two versions to film my my show twice see that is totally the way to do it and the way I did it when I first filmed a special. Yeah.

Whereas this one, I got two self-beliefie, one take, two specials, here we go. How'd it go? Yeah, really, really good. I think I was like, you know, usually you, well, I've only done a special once before, but with an American company, but you do edit it and it's like you do two full recordings, you pick the best takes. This one I was like, I'm doing something a bit different, you know this, but I'm doing two half hour specials.

Cute. And I'm also like, they're, they're. honest half hours as far as like I'm not editing around it like there's there's weird moments or the audience don't react in the way you'd expect and we're just keeping it in I love that so we'll see I'm excited I think when you record yours though I'm going to be so useful okay great are you using the same guys let's talk about this off I knew it damn but I've got advice I've got advice on how to because we've only both done it before with companies doing it yes indeed and it's so scary to invest your own money in but i just really want to i can't get a new one to film it for me and i really

want to like just have it this show is i'm so proud of it and um i want to have it on film even if it cost me my money i want to have it there and then i want to be able to put up on youtube also so many people i know listen from all over and it'd be cool if people in australia and people in some people in australia but more people in the states and people can see it if they want to also um yeah it's just nice for your memory also i'm never going to look at is cute again so let's get it on film you get cuter each year do you really think you're getting yeah so nice well I won't look this kind of cute maybe your nose gets more buttony that's not true each year it's growing my ears are getting bigger and bigger do you think yeah

oh my god I forgot to tell you my big news hit me I bought an air wrap shut the fuck up I thought that was like wait one second I boy the air wrap is for me my people it's not for the curly girls. I bought a dice and air wrap because you were bored at home, huh? I was bored at home because I was already losing thousands of pounds so why not spend another fucking 300?

Is it 300? It's more than that, baby God. But I got a discount code and a sale because I had time on my fucking hands. Don't tell Ellen. Oh God, please no one tell Ellen. So listen, I'm there at home and I'm my diffuser breaks.

And I'm thinking, I finally was already in the market for new one because the one I had was shit, kept catching my hair at the end I was like, all right, all the recommendations were saying, shark or Dyson. But if I add 50 quid to the Dyson price, don't to get the diffuser and the whole air up

kit and caboodle. And I thought, it'd be mad not to it. That would be that actually would be stupid. Yeah. At that point, that's stupid. And we're not bright but we're not thick. Then I have my hairdresser in my ear, Fran, going sure, isn't it worth it per use? I'm thinking, Fran,

this is genius. This is ultimately how I ended up spending so much money on piercings that have fallen and I've lost them and I thought I wonder if that was worth it for that separate. I don't think you can do that with the diffuser. So I was like, okay. So then I'm looking, looking, looking. And then I just accidentally bought it. And then I have been teaching myself to use it, but it's really not very hard. And also it's like a blow dry. It takes 10 minutes and you can do it on dry hair. Yeah. And it doesn't damage your hair so much. Yeah. And also I'm like, oh my God, I can't wait to use the diffuser. I haven't had a go of that yet. But I'm sort of obsessed with it.

Have you used it today because your hair looks gorgeous? I used it two days ago, but it's held so well. Don't you think? Yes, are you kidding? Yeah. I've only used it once because Francis has one and I tried it. But my hair's a bit too short at the moment. It's so fun.

But it's incredible. It's so quick and fun. Anyway, that's my big news. Oh my God. I wonder you were stressed about fucking money when you were sick. Sorry, Catherine, but this is bad, yours. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, the anxiety of the money I'm going to be losing because they can't work.

I bought a Dyson era. I accidentally bought a put on ice and air up, but... That is insane. No, it really doesn't make any sense on reflection. But to be fair, I thought I would make that TV job that I ended up not making because I was so sick. We're both doing so well at the moment. Isn't it a laugh? I'm just like, I'm with you.

You're in a tel-show. No, I'm not. You're not by being unreasonable. oh my god yeah yeah oh my god helen are you well are you with me i'm not you know i'm like still not moved so i'm just like stressed like what's going on there's nothing like wait okay for context for the listener you i'm just stressed and emotional you're going to move house you packed everything into boxes about a month and a half of December it's February it's another delay is there it's March by the time this episode goes out. And do you think you'll have moved by then? I thought every week I think I'm moving

and I make, like, I don't make space for it because I just don't trust it anymore. So what's going on this time? Everything's in boxes. The building height, we need to know the exact height of the entire building of the flat block because there's this new regulation in. Why is that hard to find out? Because no one's measured it, it turns out. And then I asked around for people to measure it yesterday I'm just checking if they contact me out. I thought you were going to say I asked around like you were just like,

what's your reckon, Lance? Well, I've been asking the estate agent from day one being like, what's the height? Because solicitors wanted to know because of this new regulation

that was coming in. Now it isn't. And if it's over 11 meters, then we need to get this new thing done. And if it's under, we can just move in. Right. But my mortgage goes at the end of February

and I have to do it all again if it doesn't happen in time and I conscious people to be like can you measure it today no one had availability until this week and they were all quoting me 600 pounds and I was like I'm not spending 600 pounds or something that like might not do you don't mean it might just be like it's just there's no way I can get a rule or it that's it's it's a face off between me and the vendors because I'm like you should pay for it and they're like if you want to move in you pay for it you know so then I message my um surveyor being like like do you know anyone who does this and he was like I'm

going to be passing that building on Tuesday I'll do it for you. And I was like, thank you so, so much. Oh my God, yes. So I'm waiting to hear, but he's in it really casually. When you say he's going to do it for it? What's he going to do? Like, pop up to the top of the roof and throw it down his measuring to.

It's what, you know, those people you see on the street sometimes with those, like, they look like cameras. Yeah, yeah, and they're pointing. But that's what it is. It's building measurements, like, lasers. But I'm like, but he said it's in such a casual way on email. Like, no, no, I'll pass by that building on Tuesday. I'll do it. I was like, oh, is he actually going to do it?

So I was like, on the way here today. And I message him being like, can't wait to hear about the building height. It used to be like, remember you promised me to do a favor. Well, that sounds chill. I'm so unchill. I'm so unchill because I also like, oh my God. And I'm so emotional because I feel like I'm letting so many people down because like a friend of ours is going to be moving in with Sunil.

A friend of mine is going to be moving in with me. But none of this is your fault or in your control. I understand it's not my fault. and like control is a bit of a tricky one because it's like if I had 600 pounds that I was willing just to spaff on it I would definitely have it measured this morning but like do you know what I mean like I also wasn't told that I need like it's a whole thing but it's just it's just um yeah are they all being understanding everyone's being super understanding it's me it's me I as soon as I feel like well there's a theme to this episode so emotional is okay before you okay first of all stop being emotionally you silly bitch Does that make you feel better? Yeah. Okay. Secondly, to say there's a theme here to the episode, which is like, I think we're both being human,

I'd have human things happening to us like. I'm not human girl. I special space aliens girl. Okay. But also, if I may, it seems like things are out of your control in relation to something that you would obviously wish was happening faster. My body occasionally gets sick. Neither of those are things we can control, but we hate letting people down.

But neither of us are doing it on purpose. Everyone hates us, Catherine. That's not true. If anybody's still listening to this episode, then tell us that you're, don't, you don't, no, don't tell us. We need to be able to tell ourselves that we haven't done anything hateworthy. And we haven't. You know what?

No, because I'm working on that because of my self, you know what, next week, are we doing just us next? If we're doing an episode of just us next week, let's do a self-compassion episode. I don't want that. I have so much to teach you. I don't want that. I'll bring in my new journal. Sweet Jesus.

And you and I are going to learn to put a name to our. inner voice and face them. I have a question. Or her, am I right? I have a question. I actually have been talking about this. I wrote myself an email about this during the being ill stage of things, which is like, yes, I definitely have an inner bitch and she's real, and real mean.

But my separate point is this. I love that every single part of your therapy journey is for the podcast. Yeah. Does I even need to be private? Well, I've got to the point where I'm so mentally ill. I'm taking the younger version of myself on stage. I had to reference it to the audience being like, oh, it's just there's like a level of therapy you get to

where you've really got to have compassion for your younger self and it's just sort of like considering her and taking her into account. And it's like it feels like therapists have run out of techniques to make you feel better to the point where they're like, oh, don't worry, you'll be really mentally strong once you start travelling around London with your younger self. So it means I'm on the tube, like saving space for her. Have you accidentally gone to an improv class?

I'm fine. Because that sounds like my drama school. Oh, is it? Oh, no, is therapy drama school? God, no. But they were like,

but they were, they definitely did like abuse therapeutic techniques. So it's just sort of fill time. I don't know. I quite like the little Helen. Okay, that's cute. It's mad that you're bringing her on the tube, but okay. Well, she has to.

She can't be by herself. She's, she's little. And this is, this is going to be going on for a while? I don't know. I don't know. Are you sure your therapist is like...

Helping? Well, no, I was going to say, like, legit. Legit. Yes, no, she has a certificate. A certificate. A certificate. A certificate. Well, I don't know. I don't have a degree. I wouldn't judge someone for not having one.

You would if she's telling you to bring people around on the tube but don't exist. Not a person, little Helen. Right. Not a person. No. I don't know. She is to me. She is to me. Either way I'm doing good. So we're both well. Should we bring on our guest?

I think so. On that note. if you're still here everybody you ready for this it's the incredible he's back again phil wanghung welcome phil wang oh hi hi hongs oink oink it's so good to be we never do that anymore and thank god for it why is he bringing this horrible trend back you're wearing your cute lesbian fleece and i love it so much but before you took it off you were wearing a puffer jacket with your university degree like a king's college degree printed on it your university wasn't your actual college you go to my college kings college cambridge yeah because i looked box fresh it was very new it's brand new you've been buying merch how many years out

from graduation i graduated um a mere 13 years ago and you finally got that sweet merch i finally got stash i finally got stash well i went back i went back to cambridge a couple of weeks ago oh thank god weeks For a magazine thing, the university magazine thing where they wanted to... They didn't need you for like the prospectus diversity still, do they? Because that's crazy. No, the last thing you need is more Chinese people. I've got plenty of those. It was to go back to my college.

It's a thing they have every issue where an old student goes back to the room where they stayed and they're interviewed with the student currently staying in that room. That's adorable. What was your nerd like? My nerd? Yeah. Well, he was, he's like, he's in the university rugby team. Like, you could not have chosen two more different people than me.

Oh, what? And like, yeah, he's a rugby blue, which means he played for the university. This is so ignorant of me. I genuinely thought people that went Oxford and Cambridge didn't do sports. They are allowed. I know you guys row because, like, land is tough for you guys, but water is safer. Yeah, right, right, yeah. But like, the bullies drown.

Well, you guys struggle on. land, like life's tough, do you know what I mean? Like, unless you're in a library, it's constantly judging things. So you've got a job. No, wait, we've got to figure out they play rugby. We have to start there. Boys and girls at Cambridge play sports. Yeah, especially the posh ones like rugby.

I thought they went to Loughborough. No, I mean, I don't know if the teams are very good. The funny thing is, like, they only ever like, the big matches when they play Oxford. So it's only when the dudes play the other dweets and pays attention. I don't know how they, they must be destroyed by Lufber. Are you kidding? They probably can't. There's a dweeblee.

Are you kidding? The dim wits of Loughbara are destroying these people. Are you kidding? Those thickhose of big shoulders back. Good, good, good, good, good. So you went back. So I went back and did this interview alongside a very sweet guy called George. And I don't know if I was meant to impart my worldly wisdom to him.

But he's had his, he just had a party with his friends in the room which I never had on his pinboard. All his girls. had pinned up all the photos together he's playing rugby for the university i was like can you help me with my life actually can you help me live my truth wow anyway so that was already nice but but on the way you did the meme they're like i went back to meet my younger self that we were talking about earlier you went and you went have you seen this on instagram and ticot i don't think i've seen this one maybe it's just women in their 30s so it's like i had lunch with my younger cell phone she arrived 15 minutes early anxious.

Yeah, we both wore cut off denim. Some things you never go ahead of. Wow. No, I've not been served

that. No way! I get served wrestling clips from the early 2000s. Okay. And people in China

speaking Chinese very well, even though they're not Chinese. And the Chinese loses. White people doing it. What's his name?

White people, black people. There's a guy from an African black guy who goes and he starts speaking the perfect Chinese and these Chinese

villages, just losing their minds. Oh my God. I get so much. I've seen that one. He's eating noodles and they're like, no way. And he's like, I'm just going to finish this. But like in perfect Mandarin and they start fucking losing their minds. It's so good.

Wait, so it's not even just in urban locations. Because I'm only getting the white people in urban locations. You're telling me that this is like. Black people in like village. Like these Chinese people haven't seen a black person in their life. And the first black person I've seen speaks fluent Mandarin. They go crazy. Okay.

I'm going to be checking out of that. like that. Hands in the air. That's incredible. That's what I'm getting served. I'm not getting served the sort of introspective romance that you are, but I think yours is nice. But you're living it. You went to meet George. But he's not my younger self. He's like my younger self

did P.E. right. Wow, that's cool. What did you do in P.E. to get it wrong? Whatever I could do to get excused for Pee pretty much. But now you're a grown man with a mustache, Phil. Yeah, well, I should just mustache and also I should just say all the kids were wearing these black jacket with their college crest I shouldn't have said kids really but they were the college

crest and then their initials on the right side and I thought these are cool man because I was at uni in like the noughties when the hoodie reigns supreme and I they were horrible I hate I love you so much for being like I must go back and I will clarify the the cool kids were wearing these so it's fine not even cool kids every all the drinks too and I thought this is nicer than the swag we had when I was I'm going to get one but I stopped short of getting my initials BW? I wish you'd gotten PW. You look like a football manager with the initials on there. Especially with the Tash and the glasses.

Yeah, right, exactly. Yeah, it's giving Gaffer, you're right. I think it's really cool and I'm glad that you fit in. I actually do think it's cool. It's a nice, it's not very high quality, I'll just say, but it's, um, it looks, it looks nice. Did they charge you a lot for that low quality? Um, it's like, uh, with, with, with delivery of $65 pounds. You got it delivered because you didn't want to be seen buying it.

No, you have to go to the university Habitatuary and you have to order it and they'll say which college you are and then they get it stitched up and made in the centre and do they have to check that you actually went there or can anyone buy it? That's a good point. They did not check.

So like tourists could buy it. Americans could be going around there. No way. They would profile. They will profile. Imagine if everyone I saw wearing it was a tourist and I was like, oh, I've got to get what these what the new kids are wearing. You definitely saw a bunch of people in Harvard, jumpers.

They felt as a prime mark. Full of Harvard graduates. How do they do it? But wait, Phil, I wanted to talk to you about the mustache. Okay. Because I feel like since we've bow glass, it's become like a really permanent feature.

Is this an intervention? It's got the energy of a no, wait, yeah, it's really nice. Oh my God, yeah, no, sorry. Everyone else is taking this with, you're taking it with judgment. It comes with none. Thank you, sorry, sorry, sorry. It comes with none.

It just feels like a real, you've made a choice and you're going with it and I love it. And I wanted to know what its origins were. Well, its origins are a lifelong battle with my facial hair. Oh, no. And I've never been able to grow... Never. Thank you.

You're welcome. I've never been able to grow facial hair. I've always given up straight away because it looks horrible. Okay. But with the support of my girlfriend and the realization that if I shave my chin, which is where the real disaster is going on, then the moustache in its own actually, you know, in relief against the naked chin,

the moustache, she looks a bit thicker and it looks all right. But this has taken ages and still there's a lot of gaps. It's very like... I'm the same though. I've got like hair comes through a lot more here down. And I've actually got quite a lot of them because I haven't done anything with it for like a week. And then chin-wise though, daily if I wanted to really stay on top of 100%. Helen's been guiding me on my journey.

Yeah. I've been calling calling Helen every week. Because I shaved so much as a teenager. I'm not joking. Shut up. Because like I'd suddenly notice one hair on the way to school like trying to get ready. and then I'd panic and I'd shave my face. I'm not joking.

Isn't this a myth, though, that shaving makes you grow more? I don't know. Either that or I'm like Catherine's coughing, but either that or I'm, she's, she's, um, she's got minging gytis. Did you just come over? No, no, no, no, I've been saying it for like two weeks now. I love it.

That's really good. Why do you have to run, you can just turn around? Because she's got, she's literally riddled with it, and I'm not catching it because I'm a mentor, I don't be a minger. I don't want to make you sit. Muntas and Mingers? I literally just had this conversation

with Saneal the other day. We were talking about it because I'm a manta. I was a muntar at school. I got referred to as like, oh, actually she's a real manta. And I always thought Muntar was like, yes, obviously, to be clear,

Muntar and mingra, both not the nicest things to be called. But for me, a muntar is someone who's like, yes, like, we like, we breathe through our mouths. Like, I always have. fever like I always had wet nose face like I was like a classic munter yeah a bit like a pug like not like not really good

not good looking necessarily but like cute from the right dance yeah yeah like fun fun and like good personality manta whereas a ming is more like like they're thinner I think they're a bit more like they sort of like very spotty that's more minger whereas manta's a bit more like

like you know like a minger is a bit more like chihuahua and manta is like a french bulldog and he was like no no no you're actually a minger and i was like no i'm a manta and then we just we called it we just watched apprentice instead of talking the new series yeah good for you that's what you pick up on at the end of that oh which series are the prentons just wanted to clarify i just wanted to check montes is one of the teams on this series but i think we're having an all-female team and we're going to be called the mantis it's a lufford crew on the is there.

I feel like we'd be mean about love for. Was that a cough or a bark? Can it be both? That was the Manta. Helen's found a way. Manta signalling call. Wow. Did that not hurt to do?

No. It sounds really painful. Oh, no. Sorry. It's like when you hear like heavy metal bands singing and they're like, doesn't that hurt? I know, but I've got a weird throat because I can also like per like a cat and a growl.

Like don't ask any further questions. Please, I beg you. I just wanted to do one thing, which is to say I feel suddenly bad about how many we've been about Loughborough. Hope they're okay there. And two. Oh, really? Yeah, and two, that's how my Irish brain works. And two, just to circle back. Manta.

The Irish always have to apologise to Loughborough? I think, no, but I think Gild... Gild is really in there for sure. You're right. It's less Irish and more Catholic. We were saying that Loughborough people were very sporty and very good a sport. Yeah, and ultimately that's what matters. But no, what you said that was unusual is, okay, so

did you hear, did you catch this? Phil said with the support of his girlfriend, which I is a really really rare thing when it comes to mustaches it is yeah i think it depends on the the woman in questions on preferred aesthetic i guess and um my girlfriend likes the um the mature look i guess okay she thinks it's aging you uh huh yeah yeah right yeah and you know i think you know Asian men we can be a bit boyish so like a little baby face so having a little having a little daddy some little daddy fur

can you call that on the top of it Oh my god I'm sorry Did you feel Did you hear that? Did you say Papa fur? Daddy fur You're saying it on repeat

Yeah It's like mingas and mantas You can have daddy fur Yeah yeah yeah And you can have daddy fur Wow I've never heard the word Daddy for I feel sick

Do you feel sick? It's given I was trying to be so supportive of the mustache And then you said daddy fur And now I feel physically ill No are you don't thinking Like Richard from Friends

Right now Oh my God That's what it is Thank you He's like, Tom Selleck, right? He's so hot. Thank you. That's the level that you've read.

But he'd never say Popper, and I think that is the point. I think that is a important student. You don't know, you weren't around him all the time. You might do. I was. We've never met him. We were joined to the fucking him. Yeah, I, I'm sorry.

I was trying to go for the most disgusting way to describe. And you got there, my guy. You really got there. I got there. When I set my sights on something, I do it. Yeah, you're a man of the mission and well done you. How are you? Okay.

Yeah, okay. Not bad. Pretty good. I'm sad that it's getting warmer. I like winter. I like cold. Really? I like it. I hate. The sun came out today and everyone's joyous. It's still chilly. It's not like it's warm yet. It's not sweaty weather yet. You've got to enjoy the transition period. I'm up in my house like Orlock, looking out at everyone. But don't you hear the darkness? No, I like the darkness. Really?

Yeah, I like the long nights of winter. I like long nights. You know, nothing bums me out more than the the birds starting to sing in the morning. What? Have you ever been out? And then like 3, 4 a.m. You hear birds. You're like, fuck! No!

The spell is over. It's like Cinderella. My carriage is turning into a bumpkin. That happens at midnight. That happens at midnight. Yeah, I know. And the birds actually helping her. But the analogy in the analogy here.

Don't fucking scream at me about Disney if you don't know your Disney mask. Yeah, midnight in the Middle Ages was for, it's 4 a.m. now, right? It's not from the Middle Ages. When is it wrong? When is it wrong? From?

Not the middle ages. I say 100 years after that. When is that? Middle ages plus 100. Early late ages. What's your question? 1600s, you're fucking moron. Next question.

Wow. You like the long nights of winter. I think it's growing up in Malaysia, growing up in very sunny, tropical place. I just like I've had my fill of sun. I think of your lifetime. Are you talking? Yeah, pretty much. I'm not joking, sorry, no.

Yeah, wow, that's fascinating to me. I find it's so depressing. Exceptionally depressing. Do you like going out to gig in the dark? Yeah. Yeah. You know, summer gigs are rough, man. People, you know, summer gigs are not nice.

When there's sunlight coming through a window or something, people are like, I should be outside. I kind of know. When there's beer gardens, people don't come in coming from the games. Okay, that's like July, August. But the rest of the time, when you're like leaving your house and it's bright out, thank fuck. Spring autumn maybe is what we're trying to meet. Autumn is the peak for me.

Autumn is the top, top, top, top, top. Okay. And then second is winter. You're crazy. And then it's spring and then way way out of the bottom of summer. You're absolutely crazy. That's bananas. You're like this woman I follow who lives on Spalbad.

Oh yeah. And she lives near Long Yibben. That's where she lives. And it's like they're currently in polar nights. So there's like one Instagram post which she's like, okay, so now the sun's going to set and the next sunrise and she goes on her phone, like her Apple phone. And it goes March 20th, 2025.

and this was like back in November last year and the sunrise they wait like five months for it. And she's living in polar nights now and I'm like that is insane. It just gets like a bit purply at midday. I was an icing once in Reykjavik around this time and it's blackout blinds are a big industry there because you have to have them

you're going to sleep for half of the year. And I was walking around like at midnight and this bright sunlight and people like stumbling around drunk because it's midnight. on a Friday but it's completely bright it's like it's 2pm

you hated it it was eerie it was really eerie see I've only seen summer nights once I thought it was amazing it's right in St Petersburg I think it was

it's cool to see once but if I lived in it no that is very upside downy I don't like it Phil I've been sick as evidence by the fact that I had to go over there

you threw up no no no no It's true, but the way you said it did sound like you were like, you were like, so I've just been sick, which means like when I cough, I went over there, I threw up on the floor and now I'm back to your reaction to pop up for maybe think you'd just been sicking your mouth, maybe. Oh yeah, no, that didn't really sick and that was sickening. I've just been sick. Well, I'm very subtle.

I don't have you done that. Well, I've been. No, I loved it. Because I've been inside for two weeks because I'm so sorry. Is it the flu, this winter flu? I had this horrible flu. It's finally going. But my point is this, I was wondering,

because my, I don't know about you guys, my mom's cure all medicine for everything, and this is true of a lot of Irish mothers, was no matter what you had, no matter how long you had it, no matter whether or not you were, like what the symptoms were. Her answer was,

you boil seven up. Uh-huh. You let it cool down. That'll fix it. Yeah. The end. Yeah. What is the Malaysian mother's equivalent?

You're not going to believe this. My father, when I was really sick, would make me drink a boiled Coke. Shut up. Boiled Coke. No, why? He was like, well, the only bad thing in there is the bubbles. So once you boil that out, he only left for the good nutritious.

Question that. Colo juice, I guess. I didn't understand that either. All I knew was I was getting to drink Coke. So I was like, yeah, whatever, fine. What? And I remember I'd like try and sneak non-boiled Coke. Yeah, me too with a seven-off.

And you go, no, that's going to make it worse. As opposed to the boiled version makes it bad ass for some reason. Yeah, we got boiled Coke. And we're still alive today. Can you believe that? Did you both? Look it hot? Yeah, like warm.

Warm. Yeah. Wow. Where does this come from that a lady in Ireland and a man in Malaysia both came to basically the same? That's crazy. When did this start? This is pre-internet as well.

How did this theory begin? There must be some method to the matter. I've literally never heard about this outside of Catherine. I guess the suggestion has to be that sugar. This is the first I've heard it since my father. Wow. Warm sugar is somehow. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Flat, flat fizzy drinks is a thing. Like to have a flat Coca-Cola because it, like, gives you a lot of sugar. But, like, not boiled. I've never heard of it being boiled. Or Lucazade. Lukeazade's the classic. Well, it gives you more sugar if it's flat?

I don't know. I think you never questioned it. How strange. There's the same ingredients in there. It's just not bubbly anymore. I really hope that you'd have a better solution for illness, but it's just, you know. No, my traditions are the same as yours. We come from the same medical traditions of boiled soft drinks.

Wow, and taking a long time to grow a moustache. Oh, congratulations. Well done to both of you. It's always a good thing being able to grow everything. I still can't believe that you genuinely shaved every week. Do you want to feel my chin now? Because I've got so many hairs because I've got a photo shoot in two days' time. May I?

So I've left it. Go all the way. Upwards? Yeah. No, that's pretty. No, no, no, you'll feel it. I don't know why I'm biting for it. no it's nice thank you that makes it

i don't know why that makes me feel so good you know what's the smoothest thing i think i've ever felt still what phil wang's forearms oh yeah have a go on this oh my god it's honestly it's a little tree you don't waste it it's a tree you can zoom in a thousand times you will not see a single there honestly it's so delightful

shut your fucking face i know he's like oh oh you're like a sphinx cat ginnery up oh my god i can't believe i'm going to do this again because i've thought about it since oh my god you're so I know, I've never grown a single hair on you. It really is like a baby's little thigh. It's so sweet and lovely.

Like if you just saw that, like, that's a baby's leg. Yeah. It feels, but it feels so nice. Are you creaming? I cream on my face. Just on your face. Yeah, cream on my face. Oh, are you creaming?

You've got a baby's leg and I've got a donkey's forearm. Like, that is hairy. I grow hair. But isn't that the nice thing you ever felt? Yeah, but that's meant. Look at the... Do you want to play with that? Wow.

You can platt the ones up top. No. You can. That's mental. Look at that. That's crazy. I don't have much... Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, also. Oh, what is this? What is this episode? Make Helen feel like a hairy freak. Like, that's how... I feel like an elk. I don't even know what an elk is. I couldn't pick an elk out of a line of the animals.

No, you're smart. What's an elk? Oh, he's like a moose, isn't it? I don't know. I feel like a moose right now. Oh, that's the ugly moose. Remember that thing that they said to you after Apollo? Those mean people on the internet.

Why would you say that? What did they say? That's horrible to bring up, but what did they say? I had a cameltoe in my outfit. And then everyone was trolling because they put the clip on Facebook saying, oh, she's got a camel to, she's got camel toe. And then one man who I know is from the North, and you can just tell sometimes, responded to all of their comments saying,

a cameltoe on the size of that, that's a moose knuckle. Oh, no. He ruined the fun. I know. And then I accidentally. I thought it was such a funny comment and they had my home page and then people started sending messages.

And I'm really sorry about us. Hey Phil, you're ready to solve a problem with us? Catherine, you're literally crying. She's been ill. Leave her alone. Thank you, Phil. She's been sick. She's thrown up in her mouth three times.

I have. Phil, I've been sick. Do we have a problem? Phil, do people come to you for advice often? No, not so much. Really? No. And if they do, is there any specific thing they all come to you for?

Um, uh, sometimes like someone said, you have any advice for like a new comedian starting out? And I go, no, not really. Yikes, that's it. Yeah. No, I'm going to be generous here. I know that you give out advice on where to eat noodles to people. Of course.

So you do have a, you have specialist subjects. No, yeah, now you bring that out, actually. that is the thing I'm asked about all the time. Yeah, you go. But less and less. There was a real high... When I was reviewing noodles regularly on Twitter, that's all anyone asked.

If they were in the city across the world, they'd ask me, where should I get noodles here? That's a lot of pressure. I don't know, man, never been. That's a lot of pressure. It's a lot of pressure, but it was really fun. Yeah.

Yeah, it was really good. I used to do these Asian restaurant reviews doing their fringe. In 2019, last time I did the award, so I tried to copy the Edinburgh Comedy Awards and do my best newcomer. best and the win of Best Restaurant 219 was a new

restaurant at the time called Macau Kitchen in Edinburgh and they printed out that I had said Best Asian Restaurant in Edinburgh and they put it up on their wall. That is so cute! And since they've got loads and loads of real awards, there's a really, really good restaurant but they still keep mine in the corner

because it's the first one. Oh my God, Anna Grant if you're listening, go to Macau Restaurant in Edinburgh. That's my friend who lives there. Go Anna Grant. It's really good. It's really good. It's Macanese foods, which is a cross of Chinese and Portuguese food. So it's like, yeah, it's really interesting stuff. There's like caramelized pork belly and then like curries and really good. Ellen and Charlie are going there tomorrow.

Maybe I'll tell them to go to that restaurant after their show. Yeah, they need to book those very small. Okay. We should book in a couple of treat meals for Edinburgh this year. Yeah, that sounds like Edinburgh. I'm not sure if I'm going. You don't know if you're going. Oh, yeah, you know what?

I'm an idiot. If you end up going. If I end up going, I'd love some treat meals. At the moment. I'll say this. It does feel like I am the only comedian doing the full month of Edinburgh. Yeah. But it does feel a little bit like everyone got together and went, do you know that Helen Bauer's doing it?

Don't go. Because like usually, do you remember like back in the day it was more of a question of like, oh, they're not doing Edinburgh? What the fuck? Yeah. And now it's like, who's doing Edinburgh? Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, I'm going this year.

I haven't done it fully for like three years. I'm like, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. And everyone's like, no one's going. Like it hurts. Are you doing it, Bill? No, no, no. No.

No. No. It's going to be just me. Yeah. Wouldn't that be funny if you were the only, if you were the whole program? Just, I'm paying for the whole program. That would be amazing.

My face. I, and, oh, no, there'll always be those shows that go, ah, or zero point one. Barmody. Yeah, that's true. Ellen Bauer, moose knuckle, live, all month. Every night.

She likes it. All right. We're ready, Em. We're all having a lot. Let's go. With so many options, why choose Arizona State University? For me, the only online option was ASU because of the quality. Their faculty was really involved with their students and care about your personal journey.

The dedication to my personal development from my professors, that's been extremely valuable to me. Earn your degree from the nation's most innovative university online. That's a degree better. Explore more than 350 plus undergraduate, graduate, and certificate programs at ASUonline. ASU.edu. Okay. Hi Hogs. This is from H by the way. Hi H. Hi H. First of all, I just want to say how much I love the podcast. It always makes me laugh and I look forward to when episodes next was are released. Thank you very much.

So anyway, me and my flatmate both have ADHD plus a very busy uni slash work life, which means it's often a case that mess builds up and is perhaps harder for us to keep on top of than it might be for others, even with a cleaning schedule. I'm someone. who really loves clean and tidy surroundings and I often find that when the flat is messy my brain feels very messy too. Also to add to this, my flatmate tends to follow a system similar to Helen of just having pailies everywhere and just that does not help with my stress levels. Clarification. Clarification. That's the Neal's system. I hate living surrounded by that many pylies of fucking DVD Blu-rays that he's never going to watch. Because for the

millionth time, Sunil Patel, physical media is not on the rise. carry on hay i'm trying to accept that it's not always going to be possible to keep things immaculate but do you have any advice for how to get myself comfortable in what feels like chaos and not to drive myself crazy about something i can't always control thanks for weekly entertainment h phil wang are you a messy boy or are you a tidy boy i'm very i'm pretty tidy really but but if i do if there is a pile and it's enough out of sight it will be there for five years but that's like in the corner corner of which room uh it doesn't matter men love piling men love piley any room really but it's a tidy pile what's the difference between

men love piley piley just full stop what's piley what's the difference between piling things go on shelf things go in cupboard things go on drawer things do not go in piley what's piley pyley pyley is when oh okay so i've got this coaster but i'm not using it so i'll leave it Oh, and I've got this mug. Oh, I should put it in the cupboard. No, I'll leave it there. Oh, another coaster. We'll just pop that there.

And then I'll put my phone here. That we've got 10 keys, a little bit of change, a Star Wars pin, and then five copies of the DVD heat. Right. So sort of can. Yes. What's can? It's like a sort of a mound of rocks.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. So it's not dirt in itself. It's not really messy. The fact that you're justifying it means you're the problem. I would never. To say it must dirt in and of itself. It's like, who said it would.

It's miscellaneous. If things are miscellaneous. I find it hard to put them away mug coaster these all have homes Of course That's not a problem Everything has a home Where do you put

A letter From a charity You're never going to donate to Recycle it or But then people will know I've thrown it away No Oh that is perfect They'll go

Ah Look what Phil has discarded I feel like I've called for kindness Get a shredder change yourself change yourself Catherine gets it why not

get a shredder okay I do have I did invest in a little letter organiser thing to put the miscellaneous There you got everything Look at that

Okay So you got grantser Yeah yeah I feel like I'm tidy But not tidy enough for Helen Okay I'm tidy for a guy maybe Oh my god

No that's not a thing Why Because some men are very clean And some men are You get to claim it on your gender Oh fucking mingin Catherine they are You can't be like tidy for a guy

Like you get some sort of like Like women are supposedly like inherently tidier I think in general women are tidier than men No they are socialised to clean up after you fuckers It's different But that's well so in general you are tidier But not in a lady I never said in a lady I said in general

Okay You've got me there Too-shay You've seen it That's bad Well that's disgusting But that's because he had a mummy who took too much care Agreed

It's not her fault It's not her fault the owner from Locketan, finish the one you already have. But the issue here we're trying to help is the H's flatmate is very untidy, is that right? Well, they both have ADHD. Right. And they both have busy lives.

Okay. But they definitely struggle with the mess more than their housemate. Yeah. How, I guess, their question is, how do you get comfortable in a state that might not be your ideal, but is going to... So we've given up on solving the problem. We're just trying to get comfortable in the mess.

I think it seems like we have given up on the problem, yeah. Okay. and thank you for recognizing that which I think is very measured age I'll say that I think it's very measured to be like you know what I can't do it they can't do it let's just figure out the best way to live with it

but also age knows themselves yes and for example I've technically given up on the problem insofar as no one can ever meet my standards and it's devastating to me that any space is used ever again after it's cleaned

so I constantly have to accept that like things don't remember main perfect all the time. Yeah, life is flux. Yeah. How do you get cozy in that? Hmm. Meditation. Do you meditate? Yeah. Do you meditate? Yeah. What are you using? Headspace. Are you? Yeah. Daily? Yeah, well, try to, but it's recently been daily, yeah. Just 10 minutes. That's amazing. When in the day?

First thing I do in my little office before I do anything else is I have to do my little 10 minutes. Really? Yeah. Just to settle the mind and focus, the energies. Just there's a little thing there, right? What does that mean? I try and get rid of my, I guess, terrible like fog, brain fog. But it really helps if you just keep meditating. Wow.

Just as an introduction to mindfulness and meditation, it sounds very easy to do 10 minutes a day, but that's a very difficult start. You can do mindfulness, just people do as starting the first two sips of your drink in the morning and you do them mindfully. That's good. So, like, you wake up in the morning,

if it's water, coffee, whatever it is, first two sips you just center yourself in your body and you can start there because that is way more accessible you can do it walking you can do just paying attention to your steps yeah but it's easy to do as then you do automatically yeah but you're walking mindful shower time no no I never walk automatically you think you really think about it I'm like Helen are we gonna okay here we go is there one that you recommend that you like that people should well could try and be like because for example I don't want to meditate because what if I hear myself think but if I'm but the tricks

then you breathe and you settle on you settle on your breath and it helps you I'm a terrible overthinker also yeah it helps you move away from the overthinking and I'll just sometimes I'll realize I haven't taken a deep breath in a while and just go like that I used to do it on tour and my tour manager always think I was really pissed off with him for something you'd be driving and then I don't know we've been silent for like half an hour and I don't know I just go And then you go, fuck, whatever happened? What about what did I do?

I think you were annoyed actually. That does sound, it's not like an angry dragon. That's the way that your mindfulness is kicking off like deep over-thinking and anxiety in your tour manager. You're like, and he's like, now he has to meditate. It's a real pyramid scheme. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. Okay, Headspace, this fails recommending.

Or any, any app, or you don't need an app. You can just read how to do it and... I think you would know how to do it, Catherine, because you... I think you would benefit... You live in a... I think that's true. but you live in a spainer rude but true that's true for sure not only because i recognize a lot of my own mental uh um mental uh difficulties in yourself mainly mainly anxiety yeah it's not when you

don't even name a thing and someone does it for you yeah is that just does that just come across in my vibe i think you've said as much yeah well not really but i've spoken about oCD which i maybe have wrongly Oh no I'm definitely anxious and I definitely everything

and I definitely should do mindfulness I definitely could benefit from it but I don't want to feel like well because I was I grew up Catholic

also and I think that doesn't leave you I think it's ingrained it's like someone's watching yeah someone's watching

and you're bad you are intrinsically bad and you just perpetually have to escape it and everything you do should be in pursuit of perhaps rest

in another life but not now now it's for working and that's it delayed gratification We are obsessed with us. Yeah, big time, you too.

Yeah, you kind of enjoy it. You know that psychology tested it on the kids with the cookies? Yeah. And like a kid, they give a kid a cookie on the table and say, you can eat that cookie now, but if you leave it for five minutes, we'll give you another cookie. And then you can have two cookies. And the number of kids who cannot wait and have to have the first cookie.

And then they follow those kids and apparently the kids who can wait, do better in life or whatever. Oh, shit. But at the same time, they're racked with anxiety. Yeah, I do think. So when's my second cookie? That's what I think now all the time. When's my second fucking cookie?

Do you want? I've got so much shock you. No, it's a metaphor. Yeah, it really... But yeah, later after the recording, that'd be real nice with the two. No, it's really sad, isn't it? It's really sad.

It's like joyous and for now. It's always for later and it's always, there's always more you can be doing to achieve it. Interesting, Phil. Fucking Catholics, man. Jesus. Yeah, we are the worst. Okay, so your answer is...

I'm the biscuit. Fucking hell. Your answer is meditation. What's your answer? My answer is I just get, frustrated because I definitely like I've definitely tidied on behalf of people before and um but I've also been weirdly in a setup where I wasn't the tidy one and so I was living with someone who was extremely tidy or extremely to me tidy so I think I've also been the person that's frustrated

someone but like I mean as far as I could see it if you're lucky enough to have your own bedroom then you just control that space because that's the space you can control but I don't I my suggestion is generally I think you would know the answer to this because I think I think you've lived in house share I know you were by yourself for a while but like you live in a house share you definitely like things so and tidy mind and stuff my answer is I don't have this all worked out okay still takes over a lot of my time and upsets me deeply but the things I have learned that have helped me are I no longer ever think of myself as cleaning up on anyone's behalf which is to say that I clean up other people's stuff all the time but I cannot think of it as cleaning up for them

or on their behalf because the second I do that I'm furious, if I'm cleaning it, it's because I get something from that. Like, I could leave it, they will do it. They'll do it much later than I would want it done. But if I'm choosing to do it, that has to be for me. Yeah. So it's like, I'm trading these 10 minutes because

I will prefer this. So I only do stuff for myself now is how I frame it, so that's quite helpful. And the other thing is, I'm very clear on my expectations and needs from the other people, so I can't be like expecting them to read my mind so that then at least I can say, I did ask for this thing and it hasn't happened and then we can talk about that but most of all I think

I'm trying really trying to do the to go the other way and be like when I'm 80 I don't know that I'll think back about how great it was that dishwasher was emptied or the draining board was cleared like I do think genuinely I'm focusing on all on the wrong thing a lot of the time and it's because it's a thing I can control and a thing I can manage but really I am missing life a lot of the time when I do that. So, at the same time, you need to understand what gives you ambient peace. Absolutely. I think, but I think there's a balancing act, right?

You gain those happy memories you recall at 80, if you can secure the ambient piece you would. Phil, you're speaking of my language. Obviously, I agree with you. But I have to do the counterbalance to my, I have an extreme urge where it's like, well, there's a drop of water which is impeding on my ambient piece. Do you know what I mean? So I have to find the balance.

But I wonder if it might be worth saying, like what things will help me sleep at night to night? Which are the three biggest things to get done first? Do them first and then clean if you need to because I often use it to just to procrastinate out of doing other things which it does seem like I think is sometimes something we don't want to admit to ourselves

but that's my answer. I am buying you a self-compassion journal. I don't want your fucking journal. That is another way looking at it is like maybe this is the cost of productivity because I do the same thing where if I need have something difficult and important to do I'll go I could stack the dishwasher actually

I could hang out my laundry I'd always hang out in laundry all the time I love it I love it but I should be doing something else so maybe H can go yes I

you know this can be part of the meditation yes my space is a little messier than I would like but what have I gained from the messiness I got to do this I got to do that yeah the cost of productivity I really like that but to both of you quickly like it's not a bad thing

that you have to get these things done before you do work like you warm up before you exercise and you're warming up for you exercise your mind to do the writing to the creative work like if that for you is getting these other tasks done so you have the space to just be created you don't stretch it's not a bad thing yeah no you don't you know what I mean I do hear you but you don't stretch you not like I haven't done my pinky dose okay by way to give yourself a little bit more grace than say like it's okay this is what I need to do to get to this point yeah I do that and I do I go like oh shit I said I was going to write this thing and instead I'm here cleaning and it's like

no because I need to get this done or I won't be able to focus on that and you can I know is different and everyone's got different things, but give yourself some grace, give yourself some self-compassion and give yourself a cuddle. Come on now. Come on, Catholics. Say, good job. Thank you.

I'm a happy Catholic and I love myself. You don't know each of that well. I'm a happy Catholic and I like myself. We can say like. Can I offer one more suggestion? Thank you, Phil. Don't mind. Good lad. What I'd say is, there's another option.

Go somewhere else to write or work. Yeah, that is good. Sometimes I just have to be like, the cost of productivity is too high. I can't do it here. I just go somewhere else. Somewhere with a good sandwich. which I was going to say go somewhere without your laptop charger oh so you have to get it done

in this amount of time that's my fucking trick yourself you got an hour and a half let's go punishing yourself again no it's not it's not it's not punishment because actually I feel so much better when the work is done and I feel horrendous when I'm carrying it around and it's not oh my god I carry around tasks that will take five minutes me too for decades for three yeah three years yeah three years yeah yeah this has been like this thing I should do that yeah you'll take five minutes and instead I think it's better for it to torture me for three years yeah oh my for me to do it for five minutes. My guy.

Yes. Yes. But that's okay to have these tasks that we never get around to. I've got those and you just have to go like, it's okay. I disagree. They're torturing me. Ah, okay. What is the, what is the, what is?

We're a bit more happy, clappy. Okay. Yeah. I don't have so much a clear characterization of the Methodist. No, nor I. What is that? We're all worthy of love. We're so good.

Really, is it? Is it like that? I was, I was Girls Brigade and, and the quiet. and it's all chill. Okay. Yeah. You'll be fine. Is Girls Brigade like Scouts?

It's like the religious guides. Oh, wow. Is that not the guides? No, Girls Brigade. Shout out to anyone else who was in Boys Brigade or Girls Brigade. It's an incredibly specific thing. It's like Crusader Scouts, basically. Wow.

George's Cross. That's crazy. We didn't have a sash. We had like a patch. And we got bronze, silver and gold. Chain mail. But are the skates? And we marched into.

They're a bit religious, but nothing compared to the gods. And we'd like march into church one Sunday a week with our colors, the troops of the colors. Whoa. And we'd be like, so intense. We have claimed more domains. Onward's Christian soldiers. That's sick, man. Yikes.

Kids are so freaking weird, but I guess people will do anything to keep them entertained. But wait, Phil Wang, other than buying merch at your old alma mater. growing your mustache and occasionally succumbing to a pile. What are you up to? Where can people find you? Succoming to a pilot. I have my second Netflix special is still on Netflix. Woohoo!

They haven't deleted it for space just yet. Yes. It's called wanging there, baby. Yeah, it is. So check it out. It's so good. It's so good. Ridiculously funny.

So I'm sure you've all watched it. But if you haven't, watch it again. And if you watched it five times, just have it playing in the background. It's so good. It really does. Thanks so much guys. It means a lot. And follow me on Instagram. I'm at Wang Picks with an ex. Nice. I'm they can listen to you on Budpod with Piannavelli. Every week. God damn. I love that boy. I went skiing with him. Oh yeah, of course. He kept saying I was autistic. Hmm. Yeah, I can see that for sure. Okay. I did that. I did that last year. I did that ski.

Were you a good skier? It was my first time ever skiing. And by the end of a week of lessons, I could turn. I could turn but turning is hard It's very counterintuitive You have to lean the opposite direction You do have to go the other way You've skied before I've not skied before But I am bisexual

So I didn't have as much of an issue You took straight to it I could turn the opposite way Sure Yeah yeah yeah I went the year before And I did not get on skis Thank you

We should have all gone the same time The three genders Yeah truly that It really is that Folks why do you join us in the extras Because Bill Wang's gonna help us decide what's the best kind of mini egg. Yes, that's what you want to find out.

Yes. We've got to find out. Come on. It's a pretty big opinion. Do you now? The smaller of the egg, the big of the opinion, that's me. Whoa. Bye! Thank you so much to our executive producers.

Look at you there in your lounge. Guy Goodman, Simon Moore, Danny Tonner, Stephanie Catrachia, Oliver Jago, Anthony Conway, Neil Redmond, Sadie Cashmore, and, oh, ding, ding, what's this? A new member of the club. Angela S. Thank you for joining us. Angela S. Let's get that gender parity.

Is Angela Scanlon? No, I didn't say that. No. And welcome to the club. No, you guessed that. We said highly unlikely. Welcome. Oh my God, thanks for joining, guys.

And to our amazing producers who also have a lounge, I like to think. It's L. It's Richard Bold. It's Harold Van Dyke. It's Tim and Dom. It's David Walker. It's Rachel R. It's Claire Owen Jones. Sing it with me.

Sarah and Molly, Ria Fink, Cordelia, Rachel Page, Helen A, Tina Lindsay, Amy O'Reardon, Abby Wharf, Matt Sims, Luke Bright, Leah, Kate, Liz, Fort, Tass, Anthony, Chloe Fox, Dean, Michael, Sophie Chivers, never figured it out, Carrie Soothe, never figured it out, Charlie A, KC, Jam, Rainbird, Bryn, which always makes me think of the girl from the later seasons of dance months, Ezra Periguin, Laura Pollock, Leah Overend, Stephen Chicken, always a bit of fun, Dougie Robertson, Hayley Singer, Sarah Deakin, Tamson, meth Harding. Did you put those in a different order to usual? Yeah. That is very good. You really kept me on my toes there. It's even funnier because you were like singing with me and I was like, couldn't if I tried.

Yeah, don't even know the lyrics. Couldn't you if I dread. It's a new song. Thank you for being a patron. Thank you for arguably knowing way too much about us. Whoop, who. At Arizona State University, we're bringing world-class education from our globally acclaimed faculty to you.

Earn your degree from the nation's most innovative university online. That's a degree better. Learn more at asuonline.asu.asu.edu.