Trusty Hogs - Ep58. PATREON MAILBAG SPECIAL (10th Nov 2022)

Episode Date: August 24, 2023

The first ever Mailbag special as released exclusively on our Patreon feed for Ep58. We dig through the inbox for problems new, updates of old, and any other correspondents we haven't had time to read with a guest in the studio!(Recorded: 10th November 2022)TRUSTY HOGS LIVE (NOV 5th 2023): https://www.designmynight.com/london/pubs/balham/the-bedford/cheerful-earful-podcast-festival-day-6?t=tickets Thank you so much for listening!Support us at https://www.patreon.com/TrustyHogs for exclusive bonus content, merch, and more!Trust us with your own problems and questions... [e-mail] give us a follow @TrustyHogs on all socialsBe sure to subscribe and rate us (unless you don’t like these little piggies - 5 Stars only!)Thank you to our Patreon supporters...EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Guy Goodman / Simon Moores / Mary Fox / Annie Tonner / Sarah Jarque-Deakin / Oliver Jago / Anthony Conway / Matthew ThomasPRODUCERS: Richard Bicknell / Elle / Richard Bald / Neil Redmond / Victoria Hutchison / Emma Walton / Harald van Dijk / Tim & Dom / David Walker / Rachel R / Sadie Cashmore / Claire Owen-Jones / Jess & Nick / Zoë / Sarah & Molly / Raia Fink / Cordelia / Rachel Page / Helen A / Tina Linsey / Graham Marsh / Amy O'Riordan / Abbie Worf / Kie Web / Matt Sims / Luke Bright / Leah / Kate Spencer / Tristin / Liz Fort / Taz / Klo / Becky Fox / Amie / Emily Gee / Alex McPugh / Dean Michael / Glenys Wood / Stefanie Catracchia / Sophie Chivers / MarcWith Helen Bauer (Daddy Look at Me, Live at the Apollo) & Catherine Bohart (Roast Battle, Mock the Week, 8 Out of 10 Cats)FOLLOW HELEN, CATHERINE & ANDREW...@HelenBaBauer@CatherineBohart@StandUpAndrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, lovely trusty hogs. Please enjoy this fabulous Patreon mailbag special from episode 58. I believe this is the first mailbag special we ever did. So we solve a lot of listener problems, solve obviously always in quotation marks. We get a lot of updates from people. And this is about an hour long special that we did on Patreon. If you're not subscribed to our Patreon, we do stuff like this every week. They're not always an hour, but there's always a good chunk of bonus content, normally about 20, 30 minutes.

and that's every week every episode has that plus we have our live shows on there for 10 pound plus patrons we do little updates that we had a zoo vlog when we all went to the zoo that's all on Patreon and you can subscribe from as little as three pounds a month going upwards depending on what sort of rewards and tears you'd like to join so do go check out patreon.com

forward slash trusty hogs if you'd like to join us over there over Edinburgh we've been doing Edinburgh Diaries so myself Catherine's already done one and Helen will be this week. So lots of stuff to go check out. In the meantime, we are back as usual from next week. So we are returning to our regular episode schedule. We'll have a little catch-up episode and then we've got some fantastic guests booked in and a few more lined up for the future, which are very exciting. I may have accidentally dropped a teaser about future guests on my Patreon vlog. So yeah, if you want all that info, patreon.com for us slash trusty hogs. But for now, enjoy and we'll see you

next week. Thank you very much. Hello gorgeous patrons. Thank you for sponsoring the podcast. We are so grateful to you as a special treat. Please enjoy us trying to solve a lot of your listener problems in one go. This episode is, I think it's fair to say, trigger warning, chaotic.

I'm going to say the mailbag special edition one. Yeah. Edition one. That's a really good show. Edition one is such a good show. I feel like there's going to have to be more. Messages if you like it and we'll do more. We love you.

Enjoy. Enjoy. my little pigies. Mwah. Okay, Andrew, you ready for this? Hello, and welcome to episode 58 of Trusie Hogg. No, no, no, no, you know. This is a podcast where I,

Catherine Moheart and she, Helen Bauer, who for some reason has copied my hairstyle today, are going to talk to you about our perfect lives and answer all of your problems. However, today is a special episode of the Hogs pod. Why? Because we're doing a Trusty Hogs mailbag

because we have got a lot of problems in Helen we've got a lot of them. We have some catching up to do and listen, I think we've got time to get through quite a few problems and what are you trying to do? Oh, a nice cold can of Diet Coke to get into your

problems with me, Helen Bauer and you, Catherine Boehard. It's Trusty Hoggs episode 58. Let's solve your fucking problems! I just wish we could work as a team. That would have been... I just wish we could work as a team. No, but you knew I wanted to do it. I just wish you could work as a team.

We're going to be working as a team to solve a million problems. I just think we should work as a team. Do you want to start with a compliment circle before we do? I think we should, my darling. I think we should. I think before we solve other people's problems. Okay, we've done so many mental ones. So let's just do like physical, but not tits or ass.

Fine. Okay. Because they're too obvious for both of us. I love for a woman of 34 years. That you. Okay. either are hairless on the upper lip or chin or you've got a magical tonic that removes them all

because I have never seen one on you. That genuinely means a lot because I worry about it a lot. It's incredible. The answer is Vite for face. Veat for face. And Viet for feet. Never forget the big toe. That gets very hairy.

I just shaved that guy. Yeah, me too. I shaved that guy too. Okay, my turn. Go on. That was your compliment. Now you give me one. What do you mean?

Go on. Sorry, that was my compliment. You're hairless. For a woman of my considerable age, I have as yet started to night start, yet started to love. I get proper stubble. Like I get actual like beardy. But don't you use anything for it?

Tweezers. Well, that'll be making it worse probably. I get tweezers and then I've got like the thing that you thing and it disappears. And then I've used, I've got facial hair removal cream, but not Viet, like the home brand super drug one. Okay. But it smells funny. Veet smells disgusting. And it's right under your nosy.

Yeah, I don't like it. Love it. And then you've got to put it inside your nose to get the nostril hairs and it's just a nightmare. It's trim. No, apparently you should put a scissors

up your nose. No, I met like with a nasal hair trimmer. Don't have one. Okay. Don't have one. Hey, Andrew, write that down for Christmas.

I would like that to be remembered for me. No, let's not buy, I don't want to have my Christmas gift be a nasal hair trimmer. It's gonna be. But like embossed. That's exciting.

You guys excited to get out your Christmas decorations I bought you both last year. Yeah. Yeah. Em, you didn't get one. I have to get you one. What was it again?

A little ceramic flying pig. Oh, I did actually like it. You liked it? Actually. Emma, I'll buy you one too. Because I don't think, I don't think I bought myself one. I can't remember now.

I'll have to check. But hopefully they'll have them in the shop again and I can get you a matching little, that would be really sweet little Christmas decorating. Yes, what we haven't told the listeners is we are going to do loads of problems, but also like we have both got our little piece of chocolate to go with. Am, are we sharing this? I don't know.

Oh, yeah, no, we are. Let's share this. That was the plan because we couldn't find... Wait, are you sharing a more... I want to see you snap in half. I already snapped. I snapped while it was in the packet, Andrew. Oh, it's already snapped?

Happy good podcasting. I love how M and Catherine are sharing a small Tony's chuckle only and Andrew has already devoured his Kit Kat. Was it a chunky or four things of my love? Chunky. And I've still got my Kit Kat to go. Absolutely done away with it. I will be having my Nestlea Kit Kat.

It's sustainously sourced Coco, but Nestle is an evil corporation. And I want you to know that I know that. Because didn't they get loads of babies addicted to their milk powder? Yeah. And then, yeah, awful, Nestle. Awful. Do better. I will be enjoying this, but do, do better.

No, don't Nestle make, um, they make, uh, what's it called? Nettweck. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Shreddies as well. We can't be eating at the same time. Have you guys heard about, no, no, I can eat and talk. Oh. Have you guys, um, ever, oh, Jesus.

Can you eat and talk? Yeah, so I just can't open and talk. You know, Kellogg's, the man who invented Kellogg's, he was a mad old bastard. Do you know anything about him? No, tell us more. But he was actually like, he was like a genius when it came to a lot of things about nutrition,

but then he was also like so obsessive with what you put in your body and what you don't put in your body. Like his brother came to him with the idea of the cornflake covered in sugar and he was like, you fucking kidding? That'll never happen. And it's like, Frosties are amazing. he was actually evil he also forced loads of people to get castrated

what's like he sorry what did you understand from the first one I was like I mean people probably shouldn't have sugar coated no because Frosties are good but Mr Kellogg's I don't remember what his fanning was but you can't read that and castration is the same thing no Frosties

that's an awful thing to live in forced castration how awful both awful could you explain please what the hell's going on Andrew Mr Kellogg Four people to get castrated. He had like 200 castrations on his hand. The worst part about this is that I know,

because Helen usually does have the facts right, it's just like something wrong. Textually. So can you please tell us what the hell's got in? I know I'm right. I think I've got a history article, but I think the history is like the preamble to a recipe involving Kellogg.

No. It's like a Kellogg's Rice Krispy Cake and then the history. That's actually more interesting than the usual bullshit, which is like, my boyfriend and I started dating four years ago. And the thing about this recipe is that it always takes me back to the day of rain. spent and you're like fuck off just fucking tell me the recipes tell me about his castrations andre well they were big anti-sex campaigners um was john harvey kellogg and sylvester graham of the kellog's

company uh anti-sex they were anti-sex campaigners um what that they thought the problem with christianity was that all the holiest people were virgins um yeah wait i don't understand what so they thought you can only be properly holy if you were a Virgin, so they wanted more holiness and connection to God, so they kind of pro, what's the word, promoted, promoted, um, anti-sex ideologies, which included, which included castrations. Yeah, they were part of a plan to reduce masturbation and sexual activity. Um, so it started with castration. I told you.

And all they needed to do was send them all on a nationwide tour. And he was already a successful serial maker. It's like, if you're already doing well in cereal, why move into castration? It's such a weird segue. way. It's an odd escalation, isn't it? It's like when a reality star and he tries to get involved

with the UN, it's like, what are you doing, babe? Oh, yeah. Do a line with pretty little thing. Like, what do you, like, it feels like the opposite of that, but yeah, I know what you mean. It feels like a jump.

It feels like a big jump. I like, especially because you're like, it's odd to be anti-sex but then obsessed with breakfast. Mm-hmm. Do you know what I mean? Like, to be like, no, hanky-panky,

but I assume somehow you'll wake up hungry. And Kellogg's have the best cereals. And, like, I think, Like, what the Kellogg's, they do, the variety pack, isn't it? Yeah. Rice Krispies. Mm-hmm. Coker pops.

Yeah. Yeah. Coco pops. Come on. Start. I love start. What's start? Isn't Starter Kellogg cereal?

Can you check? Yeah. Musely and, like, crunchy plates. Yeah. Musly and crunchy. It's delicious. What's crunchy nut? I love that one.

That's Kellogg's as well. I had a donut the other day that had crunchy nut corn flakes coming out of it. And I was like, oh my God. It's a crunchinut. It wasn't. It was an apple pie donut with crunching nuts stuck on the side. Well, it just had gotten stuck on. It was just really weird, yeah.

That's so funny. I can't remember what it's called. It's a donut place in Newcastle. Check it out. Are you making a good cereal? I think I can forgive the castration, actually. What the hell, Andrew? What the hell?

Andrew, you know what? For a nice bowl of cocoa pops, Andrew will take over 200 castrations. You would take Cocoa pops over a fuck? No, no, not personally. I'm not going to get castrated for... No, but let's, let's boil it down to what you're really saying, which is like you, which one is it? Do you choose sex or cereal?

Um, I mean, cereal's more guaranteed, I guess. Yeah, but I'm saying if you could choose, first thing in the morning, every morning, the entire buffet of the Kellogg's experience, or a good fuck, what would you choose? I'll take a crunch nut on the finger in the else, I'll play. No, you can't choose Bose, Helen. The ball of shreddies and a rim job.

All from a woman spoken to us, by the way, she's speaking to us as she eats both fingers at the same time. That is abhorrent. That's abhorrent. You can't have everything all that one. Can I do half and half like a cereal bar and four? I just said no. You can, like, you have to choose.

That's fair. A cereal bar is not cereal. You're a monster eating those two together. A monster. You know what? What's offensive to my people is you split in a chocolate bar in half? At least I'm having indignities to finish it myself. No, the big losses. The big, the big girls.

The flumps. Flops. I mean, at least I didn't put it back in the fridge. I'm not that bad. Yum. Andrew, make the choice, please. I have a fuck, please. I didn't believe you for a single second.

I don't believe you for a single fucking second. Helen's obviously going cereal. Andrew's obviously going cereal. Full array of the entire Kellogg's buffet. What are you going? It's a tough call. You fucking cereal freaks! You're a cereal freak!

Do you still love it now with the castration, though? Not so much. The fact of the three of you would choose the cereal buffet over a morning fuck is crazy to me. Do you want another fact about someone in the world? I'm going fuck, by the way. Ella, from deliciously Ella, eats ass in the kitchen. Sorry, what?

Google it. Google Ed, I'm joking that one. It's totally made up. I loved it. I'm trying to think of someone famous. It feels like a very good skinny girl trope. It's like whenever I get hungry, I just eat ham. Yeah, it does, doesn't it?

Like a random, very Gwyneth Poutreau recommendation. Yeah, it's like, want to extend that appetite, but still feel full up? You know what I've always wanted to smell is the goopheed candle, the Gwyneth Poutre, vagina candle. I really want to know what it smells like because it'd be interesting if it was in any way accurate. Because for me, it's not the best smell. Hello? We all went quiet. The three of us were, I'm surprised.

You know what? Should we get into the mailbox? Should we solve some problems? I think we should. Good serial chat, though. Everyone enjoyed that. Problem number one. Hello.

Go! This is a special mailbag episode of Trustee Hoggs. We'll be solving... Sorry, are you recapping our intro? Not that it wasn't clear. Just maybe a bit sprawling. So we'll be solving... Calm down.

Is this from the serial guy? Do you want to do a comment? Implement Sack with Andrew? No. So this first problem is from S. Hi, S. And S says, there's actually an update, which is nice.

Oh, cool. S emailed last year and we solved their problem. What was it? Their query was about dealing with bad housemates. Yeah, kill them. Confronting. I don't know if that was your advice. Probably it was.

Okay. Well, honestly. What was the problem? There was a lot of bad housemates in a uni house and they needed kind of to confront those issues. Okay. And they said, well, they didn't take any of our advice. Oh. Because they are too non-convertational and scared of the possible outcomes.

So they just suffered in silence for a year. Great. Okay. Well, cheery start to the problem. What a really good start to this mail bag. Just to let us know that no one does take our advice. It won't help at all. You should have killed them by now.

They should be buried. Really chipper stuff. Super helpful. we feel important in your life. Next. They decided because they'd only signed for a year that they just arrived out for the year rather than fight them.

British people. Oh my God. Well, you say British people. They originally moved from Ireland to uni up north. Suffering in silence is sort of our jam whereas you people do passive aggression. I mean, it's not my jam.

You've really suffered in silence. I said it's not my jam. Okay. The Irish famously have never killed a grudge. We hold legitimate grudges, is that your point? Next. Anyway, from the dreary start, there is now a cheery update.

They're now living in London, and their living situation has massively improved. Yay! And they've just started a new job. They'd love to meet people in London and not sure how to do that. Is there a regional trusty hogs group? That would be cool. Maybe some trusty hogs meetups. But I'm 21, just moved to London, quite intimidated by all.

Where's the best people to meet, place to meet people outside of the world? Volunteers of the Imperial War Museum. Yeah. You volunteer there too and you hang out with loads of history. The Irish person's not going to do that. Here's the thing. If there isn't a trusty hogs regional hang, I think there should be and I think it should be called the sty.

The pig's die. Or the ice sty? No, the pigs stay. And everyone else has to have a sty. And they'll pop them together. Oh God, what the fuck is wrong with you? I think they should all hang out of the pigsty. I think best ways to meet people are,

we've done this, like, we've had this problem quite a few times because I really think it's an issue for adults in London. It's hard. We generally would say Sports teams always excellent Sorry, there is a key bit of info at the end of the email Which says, I don't do sports I only drinking social situations

Volunteering is incredibly good for meeting people Not necessarily at the war museum but definitely at charities Out of the things, it's good fun There's 100% like charity groups are like fucking amazing So you like meet so many people Like if you don't do sports it's fine Like one of my old friends just like old friends That sounds so awful

I was going to say like ex-agent but then she's a friend now so I went old friend One of my friends There's a lot of Amdram Which is fucking incredible Because that group's like really really fun I used to go out with someone who

Was in show choir Of course he did And they all sang like Homosexual Man doing I think he's good I think he's settling down With a guy now Making soap

Okay alright Catherine You can listen back to the podcast I'm sure it's crumpled in there Or maybe this was before the podcast I think Amdram The one that made me the bath bum from scratch Is he actually with man now No, he's up with a man, now.

Amdram and volunteering. Show choir. And choirs are really good. They didn't have to be a show choir. Quires are good. And if you're queer, there's lots of queer spaces that you can go and do things. And what's that bitch night? Butch please.

Butch please. And alternatively, I think if you're like, I think if you have a new job, that's a really good space to like join committees, join volunteer groups within it. Because often that's the best way to meet people. totally also like local independent bookshops also have like loads of meetups usually oh that's a cool idea like it's like the new church you know to me like church these people social life i didn't know that but like book clubs can like happen an independent bookshop oh yeah you could also get really intensely into a different religion like if you're done with catholicism why not like become a scientology but don't become a quaker because it's no chatting

yeah and if you're looking for company it's so quiet it's awkward and they are rivals of our beloved kellogg's so are they I don't got it, why do I not go? A Quaker Oates. All right, all right. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I'm thinking castrations. Oh my God, what is wrong with you?

We hope that solved your problem. So we look forward to hearing for you in a year when you've taken none of our advice. Next. Well, this is another update actually. Yeah. Ooh, this is cool. One that ended quite positively and has proved Catherine right. Someone's in a well.

I'm so excited. How did you hear that from Proved Catherine Wright? I just heard, um, right. You truly live in the world you want to see, don't you? Helen's work. So this, this person signed off their email, Laddie Die. I don't know if you remember they were having a wedding. Yes.

They're getting married after COVID delays. And a new member of their work team had been added. And they didn't really want to invite them to the wedding. Yes, yes. Um, but they didn't know what to do. And you said, Catherine, that, um, just to, that you wouldn't notice if they were there or not because you'd have such fun on your wedding day. which has been proved right. But luckily, this person writes, Laddie Die,

is that the person left their work and got a new job, so they didn't even have to invite them in the end. The problem solved itself. But they had a lovely wedding. How did that prove me right? It went so quickly. Catherine's answer, she was absolutely right. I wouldn't have noticed at all.

I didn't realize how quick it goes and just wanted to let her know that she was 100% correct. I'll take it. And then one-nil to Catherine. And there's a nice update of Helen there as well. Um, the, this is a, um, a two men getting married. Hi, Ladda. Is one of them in a well?

Uh, no. But one of them was in, uh, a recreation of Lady Diana's dress. With a train one foot longer than, uh, Lady Diana. Wait, the actual, like, original dress designed by the Emmanuel. What are you talking about? Okay, so we just all looked at the picture and it's fucking fabulous. You look flawless. Are you kidding?

You know what the Emmanuel's did a great job for Diana? And I feel they did a great job for you. Wow. Wow. Okay, that slacks a one-all for me and Catherine, no. I'm sorry, I think you get two points. Did you tell them to wear that? No.

No, why would that? I suppose that would be the sort of thing, Helen, wouldn't have bought that for me. I'm like, I'm happy, but I'm pissed up. Okay, then 1-0. 1-0. 1-0. That is beautiful. And it makes so much more sense of Laddie die now.

It really does. Okay. Then we've got a fresh problem after those two updates. Oh, I just got that laddie die. You just got it? like a laddie you just got it yeah got gone okay I thought it was like la di da like or like lappida you know lapidida what the fuck is lapidida like lapidida like lapipida like are we having a like a collective stroke I actually should stop drinking this coffee no lapidida isn't that like that's a german version of like

I didn't it um yeah lapida da I know I heard that no I don't speak Greek German. I feel like in a panic you've made something German up hoping that we won't call you out. There's something like that. Pappapitso or La Pippida. No, La Pippida is. Yeah. Yeah, look it up. I feel like it is. Okay. Now I'm worried that I'm wrong. What's the Lappity Da. Is that what you mean? You mean that song that's like? No, lapidida. I don't know what's happening. This is bad podcasting. Let's go, Andrew. Okay. Let's do that problem. this is from A Hey! Hey! A says

Hello beautiful Hogies. Hello! Yes, always. Just what I quickly say, since I've recently become a Patreon, it's so brilliant to hear all the gossip. I feel like I'm listening to my mate's chat. Thank you, A.

Yay, thank you, A. No, to be fair, we put all of our secrets in the extras. I've seen a lot more of our secrets in the extras. If you want to hear who we're fucking, I would pay the extra. I think it's worth it. Steamy. Yeah, it is pretty steamy.

And also, like, well, steamy and then also disgusting. But yes. Thank you. So glad you're enjoying. and I love when people join and then are hyped about it and you have all those older episodes to catch up on. Every single episode has an extra's episode with it. So if you become one, you get now like 58.

That's amazing. Yeah. Cool. So onto the problem, it might be a bit of a weird one, but I thought you could give me some recommendations. Okay, let's try. I've been antidepressants for the last five years. I dose so high that they don't usually prescribe that amount in England, but because I started on it in Scotland

and we'd be crazy up there, I continued when I moved down. A, I am also on a Celtic amount of antidepressants. We love to hear a new barrow. Is that how do you measure it Celtic about? That's really fun. Yep, I got it. I got you. I've been on them for 10 years.

Let's go. What's the question? Well, since I've been on them for so long and before that had various problems, I only got jiggy with life a few years ago. God, jiggy with life. What a great phrase. As wonderful as sexes, I can't bloody complete the game.

Yes, I can't come. I never have, and I try wanking, but I just get so bored. Shock horror, though, I'm a squirter. So I only make a lot of mess, even if I'm only on a four out of ten on the scale. of sexual satisfaction. Are there any ways

I can learn to get there? How does your medication affect your ability to really enjoy the moment? Any advice on toys, relaxation, or I don't really know, pushing myself in a well and moving to Germany. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Love you all. No joke. This person is a squirter who squirts even when they haven't come. Yeah. So I guess a lot of the problem is like they're making so much mess. They just want to actually get some satisfaction out of it

for all that hassle. And also it's like presumably your partners often think that you have come when you squirt because for example, this idiot didn't know that that was a thing that could happen when you haven't orgasmed. So I will say this.

I'd never squirted and I want to so badly even though I'm aware it's two-thirds piss. That makes me want to do it. What? Sorry what? Sorry? Apparently it's two-thirds piss, yeah. Google it and I don't like that. But before we get into your problem, I want to read out this because

do you know Zoella? She was like the most cookie cutter, perfect YouTuber. Sorry, are you saying from a serious question and you're going to go to Zoella? Please tell me there's a connect. This is very relevant. Zuella, who is like, she's like so perfect. She's just with her boyfriend, Alfie,

and they've got a daughter, and like everything's just amazing. And like, I actually love us. I don't know what I'm doing this voice. But like she just like, she loves decorating for things and making cakes. Like, she's you. And then...

With a boyfriend and a child. And she has, she's had a blog, like her entire life. Then she got into vlogging. But her blog still exists. And then on the 22nd of September this year, the lead page article, seeing as it's been for the whole time, like, how to make your boyfriend happy?

how to make the perfect carrot cake was how to squirt a beginner's guide. What? No joke on the Zoella website. And it says, are you ready to learn more about squirting? Yes. This guide by School of Squirt is for you.

And it's a guide from School of Squirt. What is squirting? In technical terms, squirting is defined as a discharge of a noticeable amount of fluid from the urethra. Piss. Yeah, I'm getting corroborating sources here.

No, I know I'm right. They just never believe me when I say anything. because I had a friend who could make herself squirt and we got really into looking up. This occurs after a variable time of sexual simulation and it's often linked to g-spot stimulation but it is not from an orgasm.

So what I will say is for anyone who's curious or like Catherine isn't aware that it's piss that comes out of you. You do want to... The real composition of squirting fluid is more complicated, however. It's true that the fluid associated with squirting does come from the bladder.

In addition, it can... It contains urea, creatinine, and uric acid, all of which are found in urine. Okay. What does it say about making it happen? Myths associate with Smith one squirting is fake. Oh no, it's just myths. Squirting can only occur with G-pot. Squirting can only occur with G-spot stimulation.

There's no doubt for many G-spot stimulation is the easiest way to square. It's not the only way, however. The G-spot is the fleshy nub located towards the... It's a clue. Yeah, the clip, like the opening of the vagina When you are aroused, the G-spot will fill with blood And seemingly grow larger I mean, I thought the...

No, we're not talking about the clip, we're talking about the G-spot. The clip and the G-spot are separate, aren't they? Yeah, they are. Oh my God, they are. Helen! Helen! Helen! Helen! Helen! Helen, look at me.

Tell me that you knew that women had a G-spot. Tell me that you knew that women had a G-spot. I thought we did, I thought it was the clip. I thought the clip was the G-spot. Oh my God! Helen I knew guys of one of their assholes Are you fucking kidding me

Okay listen to me I'm 31 I know I want you to look at me though This is very simple This is not a complicated thing No listen look at me Helen

Helen Helen Look at me Honestly as a woman I need a minute right now And I feel like you're not being respectful of that It is mad that you didn't know it But also The myth has been perpetuated

That women don't for a long time As has the difficulty of finding it By men who ultimately don't know how to please women and if they feel bad I've never had a relationship It's because No, babe, the more you get to know yourself

The more you'll be able to show people what you want and what you love I'm married for the baby by now if I had a better sex education at school But can I just explain that you don't You also don't love penetrative sex So the discovery of this I didn't know there was a G-spot though

Can I tell you where it is? Yeah, well can you just point it out for me I'm not going to get in there I'm not going to get in there What I am going to tell you is this Can I go to the bathroom really quickly No, you cannot But here's one, well you can't after I tell

you. You can tell you, you can go to the bathroom after I tell you. Does that seem I'm going to tell you how to find it? Can I tell you? Yeah. Put your phone down. Okay. When you are entering a woman, the G spot on most women is literally a human finger length up. So you're cool. It's not going to be hard to find. It's on the front, essentially, if I'm fingering you with not on the front. I know the spot you're talking about. That's a G spot. Listen to me. The spot

itself, you should know because it is unlike where everything else internally is soft. It will feel slightly ridged. Like teeth. No, not like teeth. Just like little folds. Do you know what I'm saying? I do know what you mean. Do you know which spot I mean? No, I need to go explore myself. I cannot believe either something I haven't found.

Either can I and it feels like you haven't even been rattling around and that's fine. But it's on the front wall. Front wall, a bed of finger up. The things that I've gone up there, Catherine. I... You just need your finger to go up and do you want to go to the bathroom and find it and then come back? Yeah. This is going to be really profound for the level. listener, I think. Catherine, if you want to do a problem while I'm gone, okay?

No, I think everyone should take a pause. Listen, I'm going to guide the listeners into doing the same thing while you're in the bathroom, all right? Okay. See you later. The first thing I want to say is that Helen cannot be alone. She's an incredibly hypersexual woman and there's no way that some of you weren't also surprised. So if you're laughing along at home, that's grand. But if you're also like, what the fuck? Then it's also, that's okay. And you're not alone. And Helen is currently in the bathroom and I'm fascinated to see what happens when she comes back. But if you also want to go to the bathroom and check out what's going on you can. I would also say it's probably an easier thing to find if you're like sit up or lie back

rather than like going to the loo. I don't know quite a how she's going to like bend over in that situation. Listen, I don't know what she's up to. Also you can get a little like diagram on the internet if you're a bit lost. Mainly though, I'd say it's unlikely that you're going to like just feel your G spot and be like, whoa, that's amazing. You'd actually have to like stimulate it for some time, I imagine. But then again, it's important to say I'm here rambling at you.

but I didn't know that squirting was piss so we're all learning today we really are we're all learning and look this is a a place for that

and A has really A has actually been really abandoned in this situation because A was sending their problem and we were like squirting

she's back she's back she's back hi hi it's not that yes it is there it's not that

it is there I would have felt it by now as well. I think I've got a, it's an, I reckon mine's further in. No, Helen, it is there. You have incredibly long fingers. It is there. I have, and this is the thing. I have incredibly long fingers.

And I'm telling you. It's there, Helen. This might be why I don't enjoy penetrators of sex. I think mine's higher up. No, Helen. I think mine is in the uterus. It's not in the uterus. And that frightens me because that means if I do get pregnant,

my baby might be the first thing that stimulates my J-Spot. And I'm not willing to be that mother. Helen, it's not. I'm not willing to be that mother. It's not, but also lots of women do comment No, because like I shove tampons up there, moon cups and I've never brushed against something that's been like, oh no. No, that's what I was saying to the people while you were gone

is that it's not a thing where it's like, it immediately goes, oh, that's amazing. It's not like you're, it's not even as sensitive, I would say, as your clit. It's more that like when you give it attention. So when people masturbate, yeah, do they do their G-spot as well as the cliques? I'm just going on the clip.

Yes, people also do their G-spot. Also, it depends on whether or not you enjoy penetrative sex. I, I mean, since before, I don't hate penetrative sex, but I don't get anything from it. It's so funny, isn't it? So maybe it's not being stimulated. This is what I'm saying, I think mine might be like. No, I just think you don't, haven't necessarily found it. But also some people know where the G spot is.

Well, I don't want to be the woman who doesn't know where her G spot is. No, you shouldn't be, but what I'm saying to you. Oh my God. Is that what seven is in Friends? What? You know that famous clip from Friends? But she's like, seven, seven. seven. No. Seven.

I don't know what you're talking about. You keep talking about. I'm going to find this clip. But can I just, we need to go back to A and their problem. Oh, A. You're fine. No, Helen. No. What was A's problem? I can't remember. But Helen. Helen. Oh, um, orgasming. Helen. A cool thing that's happening right now, though, is I do think we're booking stereotypes.

I think there's a stereotype that it's lesbians who don't like penitive sex and straight women who fucking love it. Whereas actually, I think we're, we're on opposite of the spectrum. The friend's climax scene to you because this is. I don't want you to I don't want you to Also Helen They were acting It's not a documentary

Put your phone down And let's answer A please Put your phone down and let's answer A Put your phone down and let's answer A Put your Yes yes We had the sex Uh oh

It was bad It was fine To my god Somebody's killed Monica It says there's seven Erogenous sounds On a woman's body

Okay And then she plays out where these seven zones are. Okay. I've got two. What are they? Ears. Yeah.

And clit. No, I meant. One, two, three, and then go to seven. Ears and clit. Ears, clit, nipple. Oh, yeah, nipple, that's a good one. G-spot? Well, G-spot's new for Helen.

But what's the seven? What are the other... The important thing is to take your time. Mix them up. It's not bad podcasting. I think it's important. That is bad podcasting. Sorry, everyone.

Can we return to A, please? Okay, A, let's do this. Yes, antidepressants are a nightmare for coming. I found it really hard. I'm now on a low dose that's not Celtic, so I can come, but I will say for me, I've never been able to come with someone that I did not have any sort of emotional attachment to,

hence a lot of faking in my very, very early years and then just like not giving a shit and being like, nothing for me. Like, I do have to focus quite a lot. I think a lot of people do have to, like, it's like, you know, mental energy going into it. And I think a lot of it is being clear with your sexual partner that, like, don't say that.

Or don't do this. Like, because it can be very distracting. Like for me, I find it really hard to come if someone was like playing with my nipples because I find it like a bit painful and sore. You're very like sensitive nipples. So you just need to like instruct them but you can focus.

Think of someone else usually. What's your advice to them in terms of the antidepressant? Oh, I'm cold turkey off the antidepressants. No, Ellen, no. No, it's just, you've really got to focus and you also can communicate that to whoever's your search partner is and also like it is just,

it is a fucking numbers game of like you will not have an orgasm every time you have sex. Like, you've really got to. Yeah. I wish I could make it so easy because some people do come super easy. I'm definitely not one of them. I get turned on very easily,

which is very frustrating because I'm always turned on but I'm never coming. But Emma, how was that funny, my love? How was that funny? Sorry, anyone who can't hear Emma is just giggling in the corner at me being vulnerable about my clit and my newly found non-existing grueling. You were being quite honest, actually.

It's been the worst episode for me so far, by the way. Question for you, though. Are you not coming when you're wanking that many times a day? No, I'm coming when I'm wanking. I know exactly what I'm doing. And I'm fully focused. There's nothing to distract me. Not like your job or the economy.

What job? What job? Fine, fine, fine, fine. I think that's all of pretty good advice. I actually think that was really good and very honest of you. And I think, additionally, I do think that this is a thing that is valid to talk to your GP about. I do think like

not coming is like that is a like I think it's a human right. I mean it's not not from other people but you are absolutely entitled to want it for yourself and why would Hermione Granger join the UN if it wasn't for

women having the right to come you know it seems Richard when he was asked about arts funding during the war and they went like you're just going to slash the arts funding and he went what are we fighting for what are we fighting

do that really happen yeah god you're good thank you I'm very knowledgeable babe you really are with a G spot it turns out

it turns out hey I really think you should do some research between now and the next episode and report back I'll do my best I cannot believe

but the funniest bit about all of that was when we started and I think it was somebody said the G spot and you were like oh yeah yeah the clip and then carried on

and the rest of us I was so confident you're like yeah that's the clip and you were like the clip and he's like what? No, no, that's not what we meant? No, what? Is she going to catch on? Oh, she doesn't know. Oh, she doesn't know. Let's say, if you go to your GP

and talk about I'm not coming, I might go to my GP after a full exploration. When I'm not in toilets at studio, when, and if, I mean, my G spot might be higher up. Like, we don't know that. Like, that's not totally impossible. And also I think I'm 31.

And I'm like, maybe I've just been with like really, this is why women like big dicks oh my god everything is clicking in everything has made my entire life is making sense because the people always get like oh he's because she's a big dick

and I'm like oh he gives a shit like who gives a shit now I give a shit oh my god I don't know that I need to be here for this are we having like is this a conversation or are you just having I don't know but I'll tell you this

after revelation after revelation I'm angry at my mum. The amount of stuff she told me about sex and did not mention this. I don't know, I'm putting it on her classic daughter, am I right? What? My mom didn't teach me about my due spot

when I was 12 and I'm fucked. Wow, wow. I will say this. I do think it's like a shitty, it's a really shitty side effect of antidepressants and is in and of itself deeply depressing. And I think I've put up with it affecting

that a lot longer than I, like for periods that are much longer than they should have been. and it's really awkward to talk to your GP about there's no way two ways about it but I swear to you there's no way that a GP hasn't heard it before because they've because I've told them so they've definitely heard it before also this is a bit expensive but I do know a couple of friends who have gone to see coming experts like there are like it's like private sort of a thing to like help you like learn how to come and to come sort of like more regularly because

it is there's a mental block for a lot of people as well I don't want to say who because you both know them but like um they it's like you can go see someone it's like different positions they can do with you and they can talk to you about it and sometimes there's like a link of shame that's from childhood you might not even know it's there i'm not saying this is what's happening with you it's just that there are experts like you i mean it's private um but like how much are we talking i think we're talking like a hundred pounds a session and people usually need a couple of sessions like it's not i mean when it comes down to it like if it's something that you're really interested in it'd be great to have one on here actually to talk with us but you kind of need to

to be with them in the... No, not naked, but like they kind of need to like exercise with you and move around and stuff. But as soon as it is a position thing, like obviously everyone's body is different, different angles work for everyone. But yeah, there is, there is a lot of people out there whose jobs this is, which sounds bizarre.

No, I completely agree. There's a woman I follow on Instagram who's amazing. Jenny, something, let me check. I find her stuff really informative and really taboo breaking. Jenny, she's Irish and she's a sex expert and like I think she's amazing. We just need to stop it saying that coming is like a given

and that means that you're like a sexual being. It's Jenny Keen and her Instagram is at hello Jenny Keen and I just think she's fantastic and she does online workshops if you don't want to do those kind of things in person and they're cheaper and she puts a lot of content online and I just genuinely genuinely find her she's like taught me a lot and and her online courses are actually something I really want to do

they seem amazing. Is there any part of anyone that thinks no one is listening to the podcast anymore because it's suddenly like everyone's just land there's a G spot and no one else knew that's new. No, everyone else knew didn't know? All of our listeners. Tweets in if you're currently, no, don't. Are you working?

Andrew, Andrew, did you know that women had a G spot? Yes, yeah. Okay, so everyone knew. Yeah, yeah. Even the gay man, female who were like everyone. Okay, fine, fine. Let's do another problem before I lose my mind and learn

that, like, I shouldn't have three nipples or something mad. Okay, this next problem. Wait, what did you say? that's a mole for fuck's sake it's a mole oh it's right in the middle there it's a mole put your tits away that's like equal distance between the other two it's a mole I mean just the two nipples and that's not a nipple it's a mall big hair came out of my tits just then not on it was like you know what carry on oh I got a grey hair the other day oh no I don't want to know okay I don't want to know I couldn't be clearer

I don't know why you would think I would on my head on my head I don't want to know I had a spot in between my shoulder blades yesterday I hate you both make it stop with your shoulder blades oh god wow um hello do you wash your hands

after you go out and checked for your dew spot hello this is from E hello E they're a big fan of the podcast thank you for listening it means a lot to us

it really does being from Fleet myself having worked at the since closed feet services McDonald's do you know anyone who starts with E yeah look the people that start with Who works at the fleet, at the fleet, my father.

Well, we'll list their names just in case of the problem of something really, like, intense. But, okay, this is amazing. It's a, I think it's a quite nice problem. It is a delight to hear some representation for Hampshire's finest, mid-sized, semi-rural town, and all of its quirks and fascinating landmarks. Yes! Truly, the jewel of the M3. Yes, it really is.

The jewel of the M3. What a win. Okay. Yeah, I personally prefer Cobham. But, um, I am a... Shots by head. I still just take a minute and just be respectful. of this clearly very important message that we're receiving.

Thank you for saying that. Float. I am a student approaching my last year at university and the real world is rapidly approaching. I play in a band and we take it fairly seriously and it's something I really love doing to the point which I'm looking to pursue it, something I'd never really considered before.

Pursuing it sort of means moving to a city, probably London and roughing it in a difficult, competitive and expensive profession with no guarantee of success. Is it worth pursuing with slim to no odds of success or getting a proper job and hopefully doing well. If the former, do you have any advice for trying to make it in a difficult industry? Having gone through the early days of stand up, it's troubling me a bit and I would love to hear

your thoughts. Thanks again for providing a fantastic podcast. I hope you still think that after today. Can I? You can do it, but I'm so excited that you're from fleet. Like, what school did you go to? Can I take this one for a second? You can take this one, but then I'm so going to jump in.

Were you there when Woolworth was open? Do you go to this and that? Like, tell me everything. Here's my thoughts. First of all, so fucking cool that you do that. Secondly, I feel like you know that you should give it a go because I feel like those are those things where you don't want to live with the regret

of not having tried it. I really think that that's like just such a disp- Those are like the meanest dads who are like, well, I was in a band. You're like, oh, fuck, just like, sorry you didn't move to Manchester. Do you know what I mean? Like, it's not my fault. I just think there's that.

But the other thing I would say is, I don't think you have to move to London. I genuinely don't. I think fucking great music is being made all over this country. and I think you can absolutely do it in other cities that are less competitive, less expensive, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Manchester, Newcastle, like...

Music, Liverpool, babe. Absolutely. I think there are so many amazing places to make music, so I don't think that that's necessary, and I think that you can travel to gig. The other thing I'd say is, genuinely, I don't think it's an either-or when it comes to a job or a band. Like, we did

not start... That was my first reaction. You're going to have to do both for a while. Exactly. We did not start stand-up and quit our jobs because I'd have been homeless. It wouldn't have covered me for the first three and a half years, even, not with it, not in a chat, like not in a million years.

It was a, have a job and do the gigs at night and go to the job, exhausted and be bad at the job, but nobody fired me because I was really good of blag in it. And also I was so young, so I looked fine. And just like, just,

that is, I don't think there's a choice where you get to be like, well, Will, unless you have somewhere you can live from home and your parents are supportive of it or whatever but even then I don't those artists aren't the best artists you gotta be out there man doing all of it what are you gonna write about if you don't live a life and um so I think do that

but I think look the thing is you've already been through a lot you're from fleet so you can do this where did that come from that was so lovely until then you don't even know fleets and the thing about it is it's like the what the highest artistry to come out of fleet so far is

hell and Bowers no you can absolutely surpass that We've had another artist. Who was it? The drummer from the band The Sundays. Okay, so what I'm saying to is the bar is low, my friend. Get out there, surpass it, do your best. And make us all proud.

And make us all finally understand what the hell Fletes all about. Fleets about being a mecca in the place of dreams. So we already know what Fletes about. I will say this, if you do become massively successful, if Fleet ever gets an escalator, I want to open it. So I will be willing to do it with you. but don't surpass me too much. And do we have tickets to your shows when you're famous?

Thank you. Also, to Catherine is completely right. Like you will do both. You will have a job and you will work. I will say this. The idea of moving to a city is often more intimidating than the actual reality of doing it. It's just all the if, like, happens if I hate it,

happens if it, like nothing's permanent in life. You pick a city, you find a room there. I'm making it sound really easy. Everything is a bit of a stress. You've picked somewhere to live. You find a room. you get a day job and you find the local open night nights and you start going and performing your music and you write your music and you'll be tired but if you love it it'll be

great and if it doesn't feel right if the city's wrong if the scene is wrong if the job is wrong everything is like it really you do not have to think I remember in my early 20s thinking that I had to pick everything perfectly yeah or I'd fuck it up yeah and it's like no I've changed everything a million times. That's such a good point. So just run and go for it and just figure it out as you go along. Hard agree.

And after this, the UK is all very expensive and very oversubscribed. Like, there are amazing cities all over the world and sometimes that big move is what you need. Like that big, big change. Like, move to Germany and put someone in a well. No, but like that felt right. No.

But also, if you're still working on Fleet Service Station, and let me know because I'll probably be home at some point and we can go for a drink at machinoes. I'm joking, it's not even anymore, but like, whatever. No, they're in the McDonald's that's unfortunately closed, which is another beef I have with fleet services, actually.

We've got a KFC, I don't understand why everyone's got a kiss off at. It's not open 24 hours. There's no 24-hour food halls left at fleet services. So? Car-bum. Car-bum. There's a petrol station. There's crisp, there's chocolate.

I don't want to buy petrol stations. Yeah, also, who's ever been in a petrol station and been like, oh, I wish, I wish, I wish there wasn't a McDonald's as an option here What? Oh, just bet you fuck off Fine Like Concella has a really good service station

Like what do we compare It actually does to be fair Next to be fair Would you like another problem I'm sorry Well this is another update Yay Thank you

So this is an update This was a problem that's actually solved Whilst you were away Catherine We had Camille and Rose On the podcast We would have done a good job It was about this person's cousin's husband found kissing the cousin's best friend. This was so good.

Sorry. You missed out big time on this one. I needed to tell me the links again. Oh, it's really confusing. Tell me. Cousin's husband found kissing best friend. That best friend also has a boyfriend. The best friend claims that the husband came onto her.

Big fight. The best friend took on a temporary job on the other side of the country to move away from it. Cousin and her husband are in couples counselling. but the best friend still comes back to visit all bit eggy and there's been confrontations and arguments since and yeah that was a brief brief overview of quite a lot dramatic event

and there's an update on that now there is an update on that and if you are confused totally go back and listen to a comment it was like 20 episodes ago with Camille and Rose and me it is 100% worth it because this problem was insane

but that shit is what normal gossip that podcast I was telling you about is like I know I've got it subscribed to now isn't it good I haven't listened to it yet but I'm prepared that's incredible please tell me the update well Helen I believe advised that you take the cousin that the person emailing takes their cousin to Dollywood that was your advice good but so good to know that you're just as bad when I'm not here no because then they can be distracted from the pain of everything and then you can get bad news but they're in Dollywood I think you're in a real

Dollywood phase at the time yeah I get it so cousin and a husband have completed couples counselling and are staying together okay No word yet on the best friend. I've not killed the husband, but this may depend on when you release the episode. Any advice on how to face him at family functions? We prefer non-violent means, preferably. No revenge fuck was had. I offered to set her up with a keen friend of mine.

That was another thing that was suggested. Yeah, that the cousin got to. You don't need to buy that one to me. Yeah, I got the concept for sure. And, you know, they've invited her on kind of various trips away. They're going on poker tournaments out in big cities, taking them there. It's quite a cool life this person needs. Oh, my God.

Yeah, so basically all the cancelling went well enough that they're staying together, but there's clearly still some tension from this emailer who is M, this is M. The protective cousin. The protective cousin. How can they face the husband despite the lingering kind of rage about his cheating? So do you understand the full situation? I understand the full situation. You grasped it a lot quicker than we did.

The problem is... Oh, yeah, we spent ages trying to work it out. We've got to figure out who everyone was ready to do. No, I got it. I think maybe the summary was clear. So now we basically need to just figure out what to do at family functions when faced with this cheetah,

who is now definitely staying in the family. A non-violent? No, or violent, but you have to be creative with it as well. No, I think non-violent is the obvious. I look, I think, unfortunately. Animal party. So you do one of these parties, you know, when they get like a lizard person.

I love how I was speaking, but we're just going to, okay. Lizard person. One of my favorite clips from the episode. said what we had Sarah doing the speech dialect is when she turns to you and then she turns back and goes, oh sorry, Helen, carry on. Because she's...

Oh, because Helen just started speaking over me. Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah. Here's what I was thinking. I don't think non-violence is like something that we should have to choose. I think it should be the only option. I think ultimately, who do you love in this situation? Why do you feel violent?

Because you care about and no one to protect your cousin. The only way that you can show that you actually care about their cousin and not just that you want to be some sort of savior, unfortunately, is to do what would make your cousin happy and what your cousin has decided makes her happy is to stay with this man. And also, not only have they decided to stay together,

they've actively done some work on it. So this man, while he fucked up, I'm not saying that what he did was okay. He didn't pretend it didn't happen. He hasn't had not had any consequences or not had to do any work. He's stayed in it and she stayed in it, having done the appropriate and correct thing to do

when your relationship is fractured in that way. I think the only thing you get to do be civil. Oh, I'd say petty. Right, okay, talk me through it. That's weird that you said civil. I think you can be very sneaky. So obviously animal party would be my first instance.

Talk us through that. So you get like a person over with lots of exotic pets and then you just let them all loose. Obviously a nightmare for the person in exotic pets balls so there's a good chance who'll go be in by a scorpion on the balls. And that's just plain funny. What? I'd say petty move.

Petty move. That's just a bit of fun for you. I'm not saying that all men who cheat have a big DVD collection. but everyone who has a big DVD collection is a man who is cheated they all cheat and the only way to get them back is to open up all of them

and switch over cases and DVD and that really fucks them up I can tell you that from experience really good petty but you will feel good about it I actually think that's allowed that's allowed within the read of stability you like a little bit of petty revenge

that's gorgeous bit of business very petty gorgeous bit of business yeah so that would be something and just like just do two, three, every time you see him every time you go over. Just two, three, your cousin goes to the bathroom he goes to the bathroom.

Switch a couple out. We're talking Titanic into Robocop, vice versa. Have a bit of fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But don't do like one-on-one mixes because it's so obvious. You've got to do at least three.

Do change the, if it's within a trilogy or a series, do change them within that. The wrong Star Wars and the wrong order. Well, fuck this, man. There we go. There we go. Mixed Blu-ray with DVD. Oh, yeah.

Have fun with the series. CDs, have some of the CDs. No one, you know what I mean? Open up their like fucking Family Guy collection, I'm assuming Family Guy, I think I'm correct. Family Guy season six and it's fucking Tori Amos CD. That'll get him.

Don't mind if we do. Don't mind if we do. South Park can also be mixed series-wise. That's gorgeous bit of Ben-A-Twain. Look at it. Bit of Nirvana in the South Park DVD. Lovely stuff, Catherine. You thought you were going to have a fun night and actually it's taking you back

to that bitch ex-girlfriend you started to You just started to forget about. Gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous. I think you've got the violent ones, but I feel like, oh, I was quickly wheel through them. Obviously, the well is the famous one. Accidental hit and run. Always a classic.

Always a bit of fun. Lock them in a room and then scare them by turning the lights off and, like, bashing on it. Dressing up as a clown and fronting them at night. A bit of fun. No one gets hurt. No. It's mentally scarred.

No. Okay. I just say, sorry, amongst all those silly fun ones that nobody gets hurt, just a bit of emotionally scarring. Yeah. did say accidental hit and run I don't know if you missed that Yeah that happened

That did slip out of your mouth Hitting run doesn't mean they have to die They can just get a bruise You're psychotic Okay well listen We wish you well with that But genuinely I think if you really care It's because you love your cousin

And if you love your cousin You have to trust your cousin And if what your cousin wants is to be with this man And they've done the work together to do that Then I think for Because she's for all that he'll be uncomfortable at a family do. Obviously be nice statement public

but still the DVD thing I think we're on the same page. I agree, I agree but let me just say this he will already be uncomfortable at the family dues of course he will. They all fucking know what he did

right. He's going to be uncomfortable the person who's also going to be uncomfortable too though is your cousin in her own family situations because she'll feel even if none of you say it out loud

she will feel judged and I think she has to be your priority at those. Sorry. Say I'm the DVDs. And the DVDs. Yeah! Which I do actually support totally.

Yeah. And with the DVDs, we end. What has been an incredible... How many problems have we solved today? 200, I think. Yeah, I think they do. What? Andrew.

Andrew. No, I'm sorry. I'm taking it. That was 247 problems if it was anything. I'm sorry. You're a really good job. I don't know what to say about this whole G-spot clip thing. All I can say is thank you for teaching me.

And I have a lot to learn and to study. And yes, you'll be getting a video call from me later. Okay. And thank you for the piss info on the squirting. You're welcome. I was really coveting doing it in my lifetime. And now I feel less stressed about it. I'm like, I'm cool, actually.

You would hate squirting. I would thrive in it. I'd be like raining in my own piss. Having a great time. you would be so upset with yourself. I think I'm ultimately too uptight for it to ever occur anyway, so it's fine. Hey, what I will say is I was having this thought

and I'm maybe saying this on the podcast outlet so maybe I should have asked you guys before him, but what if for the Christmas one? Yeah. Because I know we're planning on doing one again just you and I for then. Yeah. If we did like a bit of an ask us anything

and it was questions about the podcast or us that people can ask and not a problem. Like people... That's fun. I like that. Like a little like Advent calendar of questions but it'll all be in one-ep. If you have any questions that are just like, just put the question and put the subject title Christmas Ask Me Anything or Xmas AMA

and then send them to Andrew and then we can And if it's a question that you want one of us to answer With the other one not in the room We can 100% accommodate to that Oh actually that's a good thing What if it was either it has to be question for Catherine Or question for Helen That would be great

Yeah and it can be about the podcast It can be about how we make it It can be about like the production of it But it can also be about comedy But it can also be about us And then depending on how invasive we find it We will or will not answer it. What does Catherine wear on her feet

when we're recording the podcast? Nothing. Next question. That's not true. I'm always right. She's a barefooted baby. No, in a space that I haven't hoovered, you can go fucking yourself.

Absolutely not. There's some big booted. Thank you so much for listening to our mailbox special. You guys are amazing. We're crazy fit. I've been Helen. He's for Andrew. She's been here.

She's with Catherine. See on next one. We love you. Thank you.