Tuesdays with Stories! - #312 Talk About Tit

Episode Date: August 27, 2019

We've got a kooky one for you here Tuesgays as Joe sees's topless sunbathers in NYC before going to Minneapolis and Mark has plane troubles aplenty before getting a Seinfeld update! Check it out! Sponsored by: Upstart (upstart.com/tuesdays) Subscribe to our Patreon for bonus eps and full video eps! www.patreon.com/tuesdays We have have NEW t-shirts. Get em' here! www.merchpump.com/product-category/tuesdays/

hey mark fake banter for the intro that's all I know how to do great good to be here welcome to Tuesdays with stories hit her in the face with a surfboard and then the duck fell out of his bag surfs up and she didn't even flush knock knock who's there mark Norman and Joe list yeah it's Tuesdays with stories everybody that's terrible this is supposed to be cheesy hi everybody it's alcohol Joe and cousin mark we're here to suck your dicks and kiss your aunt's aunts aunts or auntie if you're black

oh is that right I always heard auntie growing up for my black friends like my auntie's house not auntie not auntie auntie okay but you're putting a space between the aunt and the tea like as though it's like aunt tea oh I didn't mean to space like um like teabass teabass I'm gonna see bass kick his ass that's uh oh you know I just rewatched me myself and Irene no that's some great gems in that one some pearls not a great film but a lot of good stuff but it would be incredibly problematic oh yeah we were watch

Saturday watching just be like that would be an issue this would be an issue the whole joke is that their kids are black and smart like a full that's a full like a plot line is ever oh yeah cuz they're all like you know Yale graduates or some shit well they're men sir they're like they're cuz she fucks the little person black guy yes and like he's like a genius which is like itself is like a joke you like get it cuz he's little and black but he's smart like that's like the bit and then the kids become super G's like motherfucker you got a 14 20 and yes he did dumb as a motherfucker and that was that fat black

kid who had a bit of a run and now he's I guess he died well one of them is Anthony Anderson yeah yeah he's doing fine then there's a third one the third guy looks 48 years old they're supposed to go to college we couldn't stop laughing we're like that guy legitimately is 35 years old they casted like a 35 year old guy he's the thinner one yeah he's like he's like ripped yes and then the fat fat one was in old school and that's right huge and hilarious looking right now no they're funny it's some funny bits there's that bit and then there's something else that was like gee oh there's one of the ones when he first

turns into Hank and he starts avenging everything one of the ones he just sucking the woman's tit oh yeah and hurt like everyone else did something like the one woman cut in line with all the groceries so he embarrasses her and then like Lenny Clark you know made him park his car so he smashes the car right the woman who's titties suck she was just breastfeeding we're saying I think 20 years ago breastfeeding was like a thing that you're like look at this whore breastfeeding in public you can't like we've changed a little bit societarily I didn't read into that I thought it was just funny

just cut to the breastfeed here's the thing that's what I thought also and that was explained to me by several different people at the park hang yesterday we were talking about this and people explained like no no that's because what she did was breastfeeding in public that was a controversy for a long time it's still kind of a thing breastfeeding in public huge cans I remember yeah but it was the bit was like he's sexually assaulting her like she's like breastfeeding he like takes the baby away and just starts sucking on her tip right it's not a great bit I'm not offended by it by the way I don't

want to get tweeted yeah it's just not a great just like they threw that in there like I get it he's good as a tit yeah it's a punch I like it's kind of a cartoony moment you know yeah oh and then he walks up to two lesbians and says how's it hanging fellas yeah that's another one at least this movie they'd be ostracized from the community oh yeah not but you got to love that when he bangs the lady all night or he bangs somebody gets fucked in the ass and then he's banging a zell weger he's got a huge boner and he has to cut he has to shoot all right yes he takes a photo and takes the piss so great great great

gag and then a couple of my all-time favorite jokes when they're in the Wizard of Oz gear and she says was that Halloween he was just messing around the house that's one of my favorites that's boy Jim Carrey had a hell of a run yeah now he's not funny he's not even trying to be funny anymore you know it's crazy the and I hate to use the word wokie yes Howard Stern now is gone he's all like I feel I regret what I did I went up over the line I have offended people and you're like you were the guy you're the king of all media don't twist now you got well you get older you mature I guess but it's weird that I think we've

talked with us before it's interesting that they've never come after him I guess cuz he's woke now maybe he's covering his ass I guess but like it's interesting that nobody had it has been like we got to cancel this guy like he seems to have been immune to it I think maybe because he's been he's done that thing of like I'm sorry I'm gay whatever yeah but you think cuz he got he got try to get canceled the beginning like his whole rise was you know right big vomit and WNB to get rid of this guy but yeah it never went anywhere right but now you think we would because now we do we do a lot of retroactive cancelling but he

seems to have kind of skated by I guess you remember that America's got oh here it is hit me co-host is a black gal I think that goes a long way I suppose I think I think they just skipped him but it might be something I think it's something but there's still a lot of like sexual harassing the women and the porn and all that whatever bullshit but you got a lady giggling along the way he's doing you know baloney on the ass and you got a lady get a black woman giggling it kind of cuts it that's true if he was in there with a Reggie the the hillbilly from Kentucky this will be a different show yeah well I think now

you're getting a little closer aha he's a big liberal right big Jew New York Jew and he's a big live in his politically he kind of a line if he was if he was fucking you know Bill Braske what's the guy's name Bill O'Reilly they would come hard right you know I mean if he was like a right-wing guy and still going hey Trump is great Trump is doing this I think they would try to destroy him but he's on the right side of the squad here is how it should be if you're politically I don't say political but if you're a good guy on the right side but you make some horrific jokes you should be cool yeah I think I'm cool yeah you're

a hip cat but I'm saying cool is in uncancellable yeah we're not getting cancelled we're doing fine well maybe we're not famous enough no we're too small to cancel yeah that should be a hashtag or something too small to cancel hey I love that it's like too big to fail yeah it's pretty good too small to cancel all right start the hashtag too small to cancel maybe we'll do a t-shirt hey by the way ah we got a new t-shirt coming and you guys are gonna suck each other's dicks for this shirt that's a cute cutie real lunch hot shirt tweet at Lewis Gomez make sure he gets on it because it's his company merge pump

com slash Tuesdays with stories Diego Pimentel design this thing this is a just a beauty it's us at the old studio it looks like eating out of the table is a burrito bowl yes we're doing the show and it's a pile of beans and bowl I mean you know silent read I can't touch the Chipotle anymore but that's the only flaw of the poster well it's not as it's not upgraded but it's the old school because it looks like labs it looks like chipotle the show has been going on for so long you ever think about it it was five six years we're going at it here six years more than half a decade wow how does that happen it's wild we still

can't fill a comedy club come on gays now I know what we're figuring it out I suppose we're getting there you'll do the rogue again I'll do the rogue maybe a little TV stuff who knows yeah who knows we're trying big things wheels are in motion don't cancel us too small to cancel let me tell you about this speaking of small and exciting I haven't been there my dick folks can I just say say anything if we get canceled we'll know we made it and by the way out of every pod and comic and everything who's got more of a wealth of cancel well I shouldn't say that because it's come towns and skanks out there but skanks has the most but

they're already there they've they've got their tribe it doesn't matter oh good point yeah they got a couple of real chalk tall is following them yeah but uh there's some stuff in there yeah yeah we got a good wealth of you have to sift through the best shit you'd have to really mine it is mine yeah mine yeah mine color me mine you have to mine it terrible thing to waste well let me tell you this tail if you don't mind I love tail well Friday you know I'm a big park guy I love the park and this is my first weekend home in seven weeks so it's quite a relief to be home so uh Friday Saturday I'm hanging out and

do you have this pressure on Saturday when you're home I feel a lot of Saturday pressure like I should be it's a beautiful day it's summer time I'm never home everyone's out for brunch and go into Matt Matt nays and they're all go into the museum I feel this pressure that I should be doing something big sure because weekdays you feel the pressure to be working on Saturday I feel the stress to be doing something amazing and I don't want to and football hasn't started this is why I like football college football starts I'm like I'm watching football all day you got an activity but football is not there yet

Sarah's home I'm home I got an easy night I'm like I should do something big with my Saturday yes so we go out to breakfast have a nice breakfast more of a brunch it's like 1130 whatever and then I'm like let's go to the park well at least go to the park that way we're in the city whatever I get dressed we go to the park we're sitting in the sheep meadow my favorite spot ever and Sarah as we're walking to through the sheep meadow it's a section of Central Park Sarah goes isn't it crazy that you're just allowed to be topless right now in the city yes and I was like yeah it's pretty exciting I was like I've only seen it happen once and I was with Matteo who's a gay man which kind of took

from the enjoyment I was like I wish I was with one other guy he'd be like no titties can't appreciate it's like going to an open bar with you exactly well he's still like wow this is crazy right and as a as a recovering alcoholic I'm still like wow that's amazing right but it's not the same it's not the same you want to do some shots yes like I'm with I want to touch boners if I see a pair of tits he gets it he understands he gets a year at a playground without a fellow pedophile yes exactly so I'm telling this story and as I'm telling them like oh wow this woman's top is right here that's why you said that and she's like what no I'm just thinking about it I'm like well there's a woman topless right here and Sarah I think because she's a hetero lady she

doesn't see it it's like it's like field of dreams she's like where where what I'm like right in front of us there's a pair of tits just jiggling right here yeah cup of field of dreams and she's like looking in the trees at the clouds the grass she's like what are you talking about I don't see them and I'm like I can't point I'm like directly in front of us I can't even explain it there's a woman standing right there Indian gal oh yeah they're a dot a dot two dots two nips and uh she seemed a little kooky to be honest she was bouncing around she was like in her kind of booty shorts nice rack though yeah did you I would have ran over there in a curry well I was um I was just kind of walking by I gave it a good look at Sarah's like it's hard not to stare and I'm

like I think maybe I'm wrong I might get canceled for this please but if you're out in the park on a Saturday afternoon I think you're welcome to look at that like because of course if there's a shirtless guy I would look at him right you know you wouldn't think twice you can't take a photo you can't really stare no photo glance and take it in and then move on I think you give it a good look she's obviously okay with people looking at her breasts and she's obviously it's obviously to say it's a thing where something's happening here yeah and anything I have revealed I'm okay with people looking at good point my elbow I'm not like don't look at my elbow because I got short sleeves on right don't look at my face you know I mean if I had that I'd cover my face yes yes please do

uh that's hurtful uh I'm covering my face with the microphone for these youtubers there you go uh but anyways the mic the beard and the glasses pretty good coverage the beeps the meeps the sweeps so I go so we walk by her that's exciting then later we saw I got like her boyfriend was like carrying her around and she was like whoa like they were she's like real spaz she remember on mushrooms or something oh she's like a hippie-dippy no hippie-dippy weatherman for sure no question about it so then cut to Sunday we're having a great time in the park on Saturday I said we don't get a little hang going tomorrow so yesterday I texted a few people said hey come meet in the park nice little park hang and it ended up being word kind of spread like a like a herpy on a lip

oh nice nice big hang fun hang a lot of good people just lay in the sun I was there for six hours beautiful so I'm telling old Steve big big dick Rogers oh yeah he thought it was a bringer he thought he brought two comics and he was like can I bring people he thought it was like a ticketed event he's like it was okay to bring somebody he was adorable bring him in bring some of your loser friends he's an anxious cook so he brought a couple losers and then uh we're all sitting there and I'm telling the story about the tits the day before as I'm telling now his two guys are facing me it's him it's Steve and his buddy and we're talking I'm telling the story about the tits the night before you see a tit you want to tell the story gotta talk about a tit directly in

front of me high noon a lady with one of those hip hats you know the floppy hat like an Indiana Jones thingy that kind of thing somewhere between that and um a sombrero yes exactly a floppy big with a ribbon thing around always brown yeah I know it yeah yeah exactly hot chicks tend to wear those yes ugly women should wear a more yes cover your face up a little bit or just a you know welding mask well this is a beautiful lady she takes it off tosses on the ground takes her top off now which is hot because she's got jean shorts like a regular shirt so it's nice to see a regular lady just take does the the elbows the stacked elbows I love an elbow yeah she does the stacked elbow takeoff and as she does it she's wearing a leopard skin kind of a sports bra number

I want to get the direction right her right nipple expose completely out as I'm telling the story but the tits the day before I swear to god if there's a god I'm swearing right out I'm calling him a fucking motherfucker this is like JFK you're on the grassy no you back into the left she only had one arm it was crazy and um ruby more fugitive I think than JFK but whatever yeah uh so she her nipples out and it's a good I'm gonna say three and a half Mississippi okay which isn't long but for a nipple exposure that's a long let's pretty go on one Mississippi two Mississippi three Mississippi boom oh my god and she covers it up and she kind of looks around I pretend I didn't see I looked around way right at the right time yes and I felt bad I didn't even tell the other two because it

was happening I didn't want them to swing around and embarrass her you know I want to make her feel uncomfortable but it was quite a thrill to see enough I saw three nipples in two days wow did they see it the dudes you were talking they didn't see it because they were facing they had their back to the nip it's not the same you go you missed it you can but I felt old because I I feel mature I feel Howard Sterney because I didn't want to go nipple nipple nipple yeah yeah so I just kind of glanced over it and then I finished my story about the previous days nipples and when that story concluded I said and by the way I just saw that nipple over there wow you kept your cool I kept my cool and this lady by the way smoke show jeans shorts with the rip thing and a leopard situation and her tits

I don't know bra sizes too well but I gotta say this is a c plus or a d minus or however it works the opposite of grades it's a it's a real humdinger of a breast and a nipple and uh man now here's where it's weird we talked about this little off air what a city I feel like I'm getting old and and gay or something because it did nothing for me sexually interesting it was no penile movement I just kind of went what I just knew that it was something I mean we're talking about it now you talking about it then I feel like there's something this you're still human like well I have the knowledge that it's a situation yes but it wasn't like a oh my god I gotta holy shit you're telling me you weren't banging later thinking about that leopard nip no well we've

talked about this before I need more connection if it was a leopard nip of someone I know I feel like a comedian you know what I mean yeah I won't name a comedian for it to make them uncomfortable but if it was you know some lady that worked at you know the funny bone right I might be like hey dude I saw you know old Nancy Griffin's yeah you got a funny bone well it's funny you say that because I never got that you would always tell me about that back in the day and I was like why do you know it's pouring this chick's hot the guy's you know railing her and then during the whole stormy Daniel's thing I was like oh yeah our president fucked a porn star I'm gonna go look it up and it was way hotter because I knew her right you know info little info wow and she's not a bad porn star

also our president fucked a porn star crazy what a crazy time what a kooky time to be alive topsy turvy times but anyways it'll be a nice hand a lot of comics in there we sat in there all day five six hours good time you guys boozing no boo well a couple of boot time to car had a few beers and a couple other guys came by they you know the beer guys come by I love the beer guys a few beers but mostly just sitting there Ryan Hamilton came by that guy can throw a frisbee let me tell you oh my god he's fantastic well if you're from Des Moines or whatever you got to do something out there in the cornfield oh he catches him under his leg behind the back he does a little strumming the old banjo he can really do it how about that and uh just uh just a good good hang

and I feel like a man one of the one of the guys that Steve Rogers brought we throw the football around this guy wasn't much of an athlete and uh I threw that football and I can really hum a football and he's like oh my god did you play football I was like no I'm just a man and that that's a nice moment yeah it was fun I was like could you say that louder so everyone could hear there's ladies around you know yes I felt good good hang and uh I love the summer and then the this point that someone the sun goes down it feels a little otomy there's a nice brisk breeze nothing better what a beauty what a city what a day and we'll have to do it again these are good times these are good times you know the road is fun and we're doing comedy we're not idiots we're

not new at it we're not old at it yeah we got a little cash it's all right good times great oldies and uh now where are you out there you were out eating pussies somewhere well I got a yeah big fan of the the gash you know I like to eat I'm trying to get this saying going it won't catch on maybe you can help me hit me and there's a lot of comics listen to the show yeah I'm trying to start a saying where when you go on we might have talked about this already as you get to go on you say hey suck their dicks man or eat them out oh yeah like you're going on stage and I say all right I gotta go up I'm going on right now go all right suck their dicks I like it can I can I throw a twist in sure twist my nips how about they just to make it a little more like hey batter up a little more

hey basebally how about suck them dicks suck them dicks suck them dicks out there that works that's a that's a play on it but the general idea because eat a dick had to start somewhere people like that doesn't make sense yes but the sucking their dicks or eating them out however you want to be inclusive eat them out it feels similar to what we're doing but when you get your dick sucked it's very enjoyable you love it you come you want them to come yes you're performing orally yes suck their dicks I like it you're giving them happiness and at the end you close big exactly and then you can say it at the after the show too how was you said I suck their dicks yeah yeah oh you you were on the early show how was it I ate their pussies pretty good right and if you

bomb you go how'd it go they go they blew me yeah no wait because that would be enjoyable you just say they didn't suck I didn't suck their dicks they couldn't get it up they couldn't get it up you couldn't get them to get it up couldn't get them to get it up that's it's worthy but it's up so comics if you're out there spread this around start saying suck their dicks there it is or fans even when I see before the show sometimes you see them before the show that always feels awkward yeah you ever take photos before the show aren't you so nervous I hate it I feel so uncomfortable because I'm like wow I'm gonna eat it I know I'm gonna let you down yeah yeah so uh don't let me down all right it's kind of like if you're uh hooking up with a girl at a bar and it's super hot and

then you go home and bang and it's not wait say that again well if you see a girl at a bar and she's like you're great I can't wait to fuck you like you meet a girl on date and then you go home later and bang and the bang's horrible oh yeah that's every banger I've ever had was horrible there you go bad banger no you're a good banger decent banger Harvey wall banger bangers and mash yes I'll be in London this weekend oh there you go I think it's Irish whatever yep it's all UK they owned the Irish it's all okay and okay what is break who knows sounds like a cereal there uh it really does all right so uh let me throw this one at you there fat man Markle she's somebody all right Mark Norman oh Meghan Markle yes she's German by the way

Nazis fun fact my friends show me this if you google uh Harry yes you know this Prince William he's the old Harry Prince Harry okay and the dad is Prince Charles Prince Charles and Prince William look exactly the same fate next to each other hmm uh Diana princess die died uh yes she fucked some redheaded dude he looked exactly like the sun wow no kidding the littler one yeah they faced the next to each other boom was it Bill Burr no no no no it was uh CK no some redhead but she had no choice uh just kidding that's a joke he asked all right so um different uh how about this this is this one we travel every weekend I'm on a plane every goddamn second of my life we at least three flights a weekend at a week at least sometimes you have a connection okay fly there you fly back

sometimes a connection I would say at least two often three there you go thank you so go to Charlotte do a gig in Charlotte also do Wilmington the week before that was fun dead crow follow them out good times a lot of rain then I go to the Charlotte airport to fly home connection get out of the plane in Charlotte got a one hour layover which is perfect because it gives you enough time to easily walk to the other gate maybe grab a snack steal something a coffee candy bar I've been really hijacking these Hudson newses fuck yeah fuck you hn yeah I'm a big trail mix cunt and then I do a trail mix of maybe a muscle milk and uh you know uh energy bar so I load up I get to my gate they go all right we're gonna load you up here it's gonna we're gonna be in New York in an hour and 12 minutes

I'm like great get on the plane everybody boards ah that's a problem got me about 20 minutes got a taxi ah we're third line now it's another 20 minutes cut to us two hours later we've been sitting on the plane for two hours I would have been there don't you hate that when you would have been there yep all I can do is think of what I'd be doing right now exactly I'm thinking about eating a jar of peanut butter jerking off I'm in my apartment I'm on my moped so now dboard now we're off the plane so they go you better figure it out but there's a chance we might take off so don't leave so you're like oh fuck so then I knew we were in trouble when the food cart came in you know the food cart I know the food cart they wheel that in to keep you happy so you don't

buy it that's the cart they keep the food on that's the one Tom to cart so the food cart comes in so I raid that it's a couple wraps and sandwiches and and you know hamburgers and whatnot so I go to town on that then they go all right it's canceled right after the car cancel culture you got a food a full belly of jizz so everybody starts running to the uh what do you call it the the help of desk yes the help desk those poor ladies at the help desk oh they get about it they're making $16 an hour they're ugly and they live in Charlotte and everyone hates them everybody hates them they look like hell so they need a floppy hat the who the floppy hat a floppy hat they could use one of those hats welding mask so everybody's yelling at these fat whores from uh what is it american

oh you're on american again i know i hate it stop saying it to me i don't want to hear it anymore i'm on american you bother me i'm off american you're bothering me when you say american every story is american stinks american united's not great either i'm all isis deltas number one american blows united's worse than american deltas numero uno isis so i'm waiting the lines eight miles long now and um listen everybody yell at their wives yell at their husbands the kids are screaming the fat whores are pissed the whole thing's a shit show so then i go wow fucking i'm gonna get on my phone here and call somebody so i call american they go it's all booked up you get your next flight because if you have a ticket that will rebook you automatically for 11 a.m okay we had a

pod to do the next day and i go i can't get there at 11 a.m because that's my flight's at 11 we're gonna i'm gonna land with a connection at three we had a pod at two or something it was like booked jerry i can't get there at three i can't i'm already losing a night of kind i had a tv taping i had an hour set at the fat black and i had a stand set so it was a hot night big night by the way that's about 1500 bucks sure more money yes the tv's 12 that's union and then sold out fat blacks i don't even want to dispose how much we're getting on that don't let it out the bag there that's a hot dog of a night uh hot night you gotta be careful not to be the uh what do you call it hindsight asshole 2020 you gotta be careful with these sunday bookings i know you gotta go light on a sunday

because there's planes they go down they go down baby 9 11 but i didn't i've gotten back every time so it was never an issue never forget so uh you know i'm texting with liz and the seller she's like i fucking hate you i fucking hate you she's got to rebook everything and i'm like she's tough with that stuff i didn't do it yes gank i'm just telling you the gist here but you know i i get it she's got 18 plates and 13 nipples and it's a whole thing she frightens me she's terrifying yet i wanted to fist me all right so we get uh we get the whole thing so now i go fuck this i'm calling jet blue oh i'm switching teams here blow me american so jet blue is good but they only fly like i need to fucking november november something november and uh after 10 p.m and they

only go to uh phoenix i got all scrambling and my brain went hey why i'm trying to pick in months and towns and my neighbors uh so i called jet blue and it's some fat nice lady from you know uh oklahoma she's like hey y'all doing i'm like hey she's like i'm sharyl i go hey sharyl you dirty bitch i need you to get me out of this city i need to get to new york i gotta i gotta show i got a life i got a pod i gotta get fisted so she's like we'll figure it out so uh now here's the clinker i learned something this day she goes all i got is uh you know 10 a.m tomorrow and i was like well where the hell am i gonna sleep i'm eventing two and she's like i'm sorry i don't know the word jet blue we didn't have anything to do with this don't yell at me i'm like yeah you're right you're

right and she's like but maybe something maybe something will open up and i go all right just give me the 11 because the 11 would get me in at like one we can still shoot for two okay so i was like all right just give me the 11 so i bought it 350 bucks oh yeah well what could you do so then i go well let me just call american back i call american i go anything open up because you know they they claim things will open up and she goes uh no nothing opened up but you never know so keep looking at the app and i start going hey what are you up to what do you do for fun what's your life like and as she's talking and killing time other stuff's open it up so i gotta keep her on the horn here keep her on the line yeah so i'm coming out your voice is so pretty what do you do for a living

you like anal quiff just semen you know the whole thing we talked for like half an hour what i can't i can't believe it something opens up oh wow she's like oh my god we're like talking about her dog she had a shitsu and she's like oh my dog Gregory it's a hold wait a minute there's a 10 o'clock out of uh charlotte you're on it i'm gonna put you on it right now i was like ah so then i get on that so now at least i'm getting back that night that 10 o'clock i got pushed to 11 30 or whatever but i got out of there but now i just bought a ticket for 350 i can't let that dick out in the wind so i called jet blue back now this is where they really cheers jizz right in your tomato soup i go hey look i made a mistake she goes ah sorry no refund the best i can do is give you

half your money back in a travel voucher and that's that and i go what why i'm not gonna be on the plane you have the seat you'll still make money right they don't care and she's like that's just our policy sir and i go into this whole random about how my kid is sick and how i'm a new dad and it just all poured out of me cistan's a style okay and she was like norman's style yeah she was just like all right all right we'll give you the money back oh wow that was it i got the money back boy these parents that's best parent privilege ah yes or fake parent well here's the thing they that's apparent they know they can do anything they can do anything they have the the reins there they can do all the shit uh-huh so she gave you the all the money back got all the money back

got a guilt she was a mom she's like i get it i get it i'm like yeah yeah you know these rascals whippersnappers their ankle biters the whole thing pedophilia and i got the money back and uh it was quite a roller coaster of anal at this airport you know getting off the plane you're on the plane now here's my clinker another clinker that was last week with the airport two clinkers in charlotte ironically my next gig the week later is in charlotte back to the same airport i'm doing the comedy zone which is always a cut because you're like now i'm going to new york going to hang it out for a few days and coming right back is the comedy zone any good i've always heard i love the comedy zone really i think it's a secret b plus a minus room it is secret because everyone always they used to

always be like other zones i'm working the comedy zone it's the good zone okay it's kind of like the columbus funny bone is the good funny bone right not that they're all bad but that's the good one the best one i like the st louis one too i like the oman that's independent of the thing i'm going oman somewhere hard to sell tickets there but it's a good club all right so go back everything's goes great american by the way i already booked it go back great weekend fat chris ale killing we sold out a show or two is hot hot one just a great night one night i fucking bomb like i don't want to say i bomb but the crowd it was one of those friday late show thursday was amazing friday early show was pretty good friday late show yeah first off i'll give you the whole gamut bachelorette

party purple wigs uh you know the whole thing a lot of makeup and they were swedish oh so not only do they not give a shit about comedy they don't even know what i'm saying a purple wig sweet all of them purple wigs like nine of them so they're sitting front row they always put them in the front yeah so she messaged me the day before and goes hey i'm coming with all my friends can you give shelly a shout out and i just even i ignored it oh i got the same thing in minneapolis did you embarrass my friend no you're embarrassing yourself yes with your dick helmet so to the left is the couple basically fucking like an inch away from fucking you know she's on his lap they're necking they're making out they're talking to hold them they're giggling they're cutesy

wootsy schmoopy schmoopy and i'm going just leave go fuck what are you doing here this you're putting your own obstacle you're paying for a fuck obstacle yeah and you're not music it's not like you're like can't good enough for your love baby you're like hey you were uh fart in public it's not it's not a good uh aphrodisiac no i got eight minutes on portarecans this is not you know conducive for a hard on it's not an aphrodisiac i like it aphrodisiac all right i don't know that's a guy who only does sex jokes well that's something he's an aphrodisiac yeah that could be a we're starting a lot of terms here teamwork by the way it sounds like you didn't you didn't bomb but you didn't do great it sounds like

you licked their balls they were like okay all right i guess this is something i get but i love a ball lick yeah i don't care for a ball lick all right maybe they flicked your ball you flicked their balls oh maybe it was toothy ah toothy blowjob it was some laughs but it was not ideal yeah yeah i gotta cut up here so i think i told you there was a girl that blew me that she used teeth as part of her resume whatever vernacular reservoir what's that word repertoire repertoire yeah it was no good yeah that's a big mistake i get it you're trying to you know it's like those people do comedy specials in a laundromat yeah it's black and white go to the fucking original thing yeah it kind of changed the game my dick's broke so uh and then you get the hooting and hollering and all this and

one you one lady yells out i go i'm doing a whole bit about cat calling and one lady goes probably you have a small dick you know it's like wow what am i supposed i called her a content it was a whole thing and it was just it was one of the shot i got off a covered in sweat whatever we have a great time we go out drinking i get hammered wake up the next day i just happen to wake up at like seven thirty you know you know when your son comes in the hangover is kicking in sure look at my phone lights up just happen to light up i caught it light up it goes is this number still good i go huh because my phone is still a wacky i got a new phone i don't know how to use it so i open it up jerry seinfeld whoa crazy to see hungover you hate yourself the sun is coming in your miserable

you're tired you're on like two hours of sleep oh i got to get my life together i got to like shape up for this text you know i sit up straight and i i fucking comb my hair i clip my toenails and i'm like hey still good baby what's cooking with you i got a new phone i'm all out of commission he goes i've been trying to contact you what i haven't heard from you what i'm like ah what the hell are you talking what have i missed what is this crazy this is why you don't buy your phone off a guy in a truck you got your phone from bob sacramento i know 50 bucks battery park so i was like oh i'm sorry i'm what did i miss i'm an idiot i suck i suck i'm just i'm pouring on the phone pouring all out to him like how did this happen i think the switcheroo with the cloud and the

gays getting married i don't know what's up my god something twisted me so i then he makes you wonder what else am i missed if i missed the text from you i miss him is my mom dead am i gay i don't know what gays about your mom your mom can go to hell yeah time felt texting suck it liz that's my mom so uh elizabeth so uh i was like ah i'm freaking out here so i'm like oh my god and i can tell he's annoyed a little bit or maybe just he's curt he's curt okay that's curt so yikes i was like uh i'm so sorry my phone was out of commission uh what's shaking talk to me uh and he just wrote contact my agent or manager and he gave me george shepiro's what information i can come on i can show you oh my god shepiro shepiro baby and the bush women yes so he's like hit him up uh as soon as you

can or whatever like this is time is of the essence oh my lord so i go yeah you got it sorry about that and then radio silence he's in and out he's in 65 he's you know yeah brooklyn jew he's he wants out of there 63 and embracing it a lot of references that i assume people aren't no no there's no way i've got about four in a row that people aren't gonna that's from the doc venner comedian check it out yep uh overpriced overhyped over everything bring it on it's on netflix folks so is it oh yeah oh no kidding he uploaded all the fucking goods he put it all up there all right so what happens all right so now you know though you know i pop out of bed i text shepiro and email shepiro just to get it just to cover my ass oh my god legend legend this is carl reiner's manager is Danny

de Vito plays him in man on the moon that's right that's right any represented Andy Kaufman who i never cared for oh i'm a fan he's fine all right we'll talk about that off here so i text shepiro here nothing back so then i go downstairs and they put you in a condo but it's like a killer condo okay two floors giant kitchen back porch the whole thing so i go downstairs chris allen's down there he's a sober as a judge and uh bully i was like yeah you know whatever i feel bad i'm hung over i gotta get my act together i'm texting seinfeld i'm missing text let's go to the gym oh i also did press so i did press that sucked get back go to the gym now i'm at the gym i got a couple 65s going baby i'm on the weight bench chris allen's uh rocking out to some uh i assume rap

music he's doing a bench show a couple of Seinfelds yes 65 ah yeah so my phone rings no no first i got a text hey mark it's george and i go george i'm so sorry i stink i suck i missed it and the phone rings right after i text and i go hello and he goes stinky mark that's what he calls me because i said i stink wow and it sounded just like him you know it's him wow the voice the guy's 110 years old he's old and he he doesn't show it i mean he's a whipper snapper this guy's uh lucid healthy guy yeah so he goes stinky mark what are you what are you doing i'm like i'm in charl i'm on a road gig what's good with you he's like ah you comics you can't stop i'm like oh my god i'm in a planet fitness hung over talking to Shapiro so then uh he's like uh here's uh seinfeld wants to book

here jerry wants to book it for some gigs i emailed you the whatever the details is everything look good i never saw it i go hey looks great looks great it goes it's a set price that's what he gives to you that's what he gives to steve martin i go yeah yeah i would have done it for free and he goes don't tell me that oh jeez and i goes uh you live in new york i go yeah i live in the village he goes i grew up in the village i go oh i'm right by the duplex he goes all right whatever and he hangs up you're chatting with george Shapiro chatting with george Shapiro this is insane legendary manager so then i go back to the weights i'm feeling great and i tell chris ale he goes that's lightning's gonna strike twice for him to be a legend

yeah so uh but was it luck all right that's the worst speeches ever i know i know watch the movie you'll enjoy this it's a hell of a documentary great film yeah yeah guys a real coxer there's nothing you said i would refute so uh yeah whatever so now i got a seinfeld gig on the books and i'll keep you posted on that that's down the line oh my god now i gotta buy a suit i mean if i get a fucking mens warehouse shit like i know he's gonna cut me to pieces now i'd go to ted baker if i were you the bake man big baker i forgot beggars doesn't it's no cheapo depot i can tell you that no no ted talk all right so maybe i'll do that um tar ted now here's what i wanted to get into and then i'll throw it i've been hogging i'll throw you know we gotta throw an ad out there at some

point oh well tease yeah i want to know more about the seinfeld gig well that's what everyone wants about it well i'll tell you folks uh one thing you're gonna want to know is as most of us have found the hard way getting into debt is easy getting out is hard you got that right especially if you're fico fico fico score isn't great thankfully now there's upstart dot com the revolutionary lending platform that knows you're more than just your credit score and it offers smarter interest rates to help pay off high interest credit card debt folks you gotta what you're gonna get out of that debt the debt can really screw you up and we're all in debt everybody sanders check out upstart dot com tell me a little more mark you seem to know a lot about

upstart i'm in debt i love these guys uh they go beyond the traditional fico score when assessing your credit worthiness they actually reward you based on your education and job history in the form of a smarter interest rate oh that's good upstart believes you're more than just a credit score they believe in you and they understand that boy i need some of that in my life free yourself from the burden of high interest credit card debt by consolidating everything into one monthly payment with upstart boy that's big that'll make everything easier see what upstart is ranked see why upstart is ranked number one in their category with over 300 businesses on trust pilot and hurried upstart dot com slash tuesdays to find out how long how low your upstart rate is

checking your rate only takes a few minutes it won't affect your credit that's upstart dot com slash tuesdays that's big i'm gonna use that because i think my credit might be a little cuckoo well these guys are such leeches that sometimes you check your score they'll charge you the creditors yes the jerks there's a lot of problems in this country a lot of problems big problems yep all right so here's the clinker and this is more of a it's perplexing than than anything else very very frustrating but most of all perplex maybe i can help this is like one of those jerry seinfeld goes out to dinner with a lady she only eats her peas one at a time like something like that but very frustrating at the same time all right so here i am in charlotte it's sunday wrapped up the

weekend got paid had had a good good time a lot of laughs go to the airport charlotte again a little nervous but the weather's fine just want to get home get on the plane oh before i got on the plane i checked the app and i go uh where am i sitting because you know me i don't do any prep yeah unlike you i'm all prep prep school so that one didn't really work because it's the same meaning salt and prepper all right good band so i i go oh i'm in 21 d which is the aisle now there's someone in the middle seat and then the windows open so we have a two man and a three man row interesting so i look to my left on the app the bathroom is next to the aisle and i go i don't really want the bathroom seat you know because then people are coming and going the light and the

smell and the funk and the jizz so i go i'm gonna swap over to the window and if nobody comes we'll have two man row two man and three man row okay all right so my move is go to a window i'm not a huge window guy but i'd rather not have the bathroom seat that's a short flight windows not bad and a short no it's an hour and a half at the moment hour and 40 at the most so i get on the plane i go to my window here comes the guy a nice looking guy i believe is an indian chap uh tits out shirt had a shirt on okay so uh he sits down and i go hey i do this move the the uh the finger crossed ah you know i don't say anything he's got headphones in he's got a book but i'm just letting him know like hey buddy i think i know something about that seat and i think it's

gonna stay open sure and he goes he gives me one of those like we'll see we'll see not very not very giving sure you want a little bit like i know baby yeah you want a little that yeah but he didn't give me any that he gave me like he's reserved too reserved so uh door closes the lady goes it's a full flight folks or whatever i'm like but it's not a full flight right we have the sometimes they just say that yes they say that yes they want to scare us it's like me with the full dick so the guy i could tell we were the i look i do a head bob i look up i do a periscope we're the only open seat in that row sure and i tell the guy like we did it and he goes yep doesn't move stays there and i go he'll move eventually so so here in the way he's in the middle and no one's in the

yes i say and he won't move yes some of the people that are sticklers they think that the plane's gonna go down they move yeah it's a rule breaking thing this guy's a twat big twat so i go all right well this guy wants to play hardball i put my whole fat arm on that rest fuck yeah because i'm trying to nudge the guy like hey buddy roll it over yeah if i were you i'd start farting put my foot over in his area yes maybe blow my nose in his head i had a knee touch situation happening because i'm like hey let's get this move in here buddy i i want to go to bed i got a window shade clothes that we got an open seat let's let's this is a rare occurrence breaded i'd tell him i have ibs smater or something like that breathing his face i got aids motherfucker sure so uh that was it never

moved wow flight it's a gift to get that open seat and he didn't move that's infuriating that's infuriating and i just started thinking about like this guy how do you live like this you get a gift you don't want to take advantage because you're such a fucking dweeb stickler loser come guzz like nazi gaba boy and that's a crowded maybe he's used to the crowded because india's very crowded so maybe he's more comfortable in a packed area yeah yeah maybe yeah well let's say new deli nope this is old america yes literally american flight he might have been an american guy he was just of indian descent or maybe pakistan okay well i don't like him either way they they follow the rules they're good people but uh this guy it's like hey hey there's sometimes when you could bend a little

bit but you gotta bend it's important to bend yes especially yoga which was invented in india aha bring it around there i did my best i tried to make it something i liked it well let me throw some uh something because i got i got some big news here i know you're big well it's not big you would be this is a this is a fake big all right like a tit yes or my dick fake big oh maybe i have a fart let's see some people don't like the farts that wasn't bad that wasn't cute yeah one guy doesn't like the fart in the poops anymore you see that dweeb fart in the poop we poop i gave it a response oh yeah so it's enough with the puke and the poops and the whatever you got two different socks on you know that i know i'm i'm running ragged here all right i'm still in my same clothes

from the road i got you i haven't showered you're also wearing your girlfriend's shoes i think these were free oh no kidding they sent them that makes sense are they too ladylike they're a little ladylike they look like kids throw them up in the camera see what people say they're very white yeah it's a brand new sneak i don't know about white shoes i don't know if i want to be putting anything into a kid kid yeah what am i art kelly oh like a pedophile a cat a file that's no good something i don't know i'm trying hey all right so i got a big situation here all right situation all over me now i don't know if you guys remember at home you probably do our fans are like they're like uh the irish they don't forget anything these people is that an irish thing oh yeah i thought

it was an elephant well you irish all simbers you forget everything but the grudge wow you know they keep it in there they store it all right all right good to know they're drunk and they store aha i don't know i might have made it up but anyways you might remember we had a little debate about madison and minneapolis at one point oh wait wait wait wait wait wait wait those are two different cities in a different state what we had a minneapolis and madison oh club no we were talking about the city you don't even remember we compared that that was a big it was first we had cincinatic cleveland yeah i remember that then we had minneapolis and madison i even texted chat daniels it was a whole situation all right i didn't know it was a madison it was a

big situation i love madison i like madison love madison a huge madison now i don't want to renege from the madison i love madison uh-oh but minneapolis i had only ever spent time in the warehouse district and downtown sure now the downtown is a little first of all it's a little harry is it yeah it's a little whatever that's like titty bars which are something i guess and kind of bars and arena whatever is that where the club is no that club is in the warehouse district which is very nice getting nicer very hip very cool very gay well i'll tell you what i did i took a lift sarin and i down to lake of aisles now we're talking this place is spectacular lake of aisles we went down there's three lakes all sucking each other's dicks you can rent a bike

you just pick up a bike nicest neighborhood i've ever seen in my life it's like it's minneapolis beverly hills it's what it is every house is a fucking huge mansion they're all unique the best houses i've ever seen the most beautiful neighborhood i've ever been to wow this show is real growth we rode bikes all around the lake of aisles or aisle of lakes i don't know how you say it then there's another lake i was like let's go check on this lake we rode bikes for four and a half straight hours pedophile we went and got some breakfast situation which kind of sucked all right these corporate everyone talks about the corporations they suck they're the worst but i go to ihop i get a fucking big giant waffle some scramby eggs and some home fries and it costs

eight dollars it's always delicious it's always exactly the same it takes four minutes then we go to the hipster fucking hot waitress man bun fucking brunch joint cool tattoo buddy yeah we're in there for three and a half hours it costs 58 bucks and uh they don't wear shoes it's like some weird thing yeah v-neck with a fucking chest hair poof stinks but anyways i mean what a sit we rode bikes all the way back we rode past the ballpark over there we we walked over to the other side of the uh the river there we went down to campus i mean this city is a is a knockout i don't have i've been there in the winter too so i'm in the winter i'm in the three block radius and that's what it is that downtown you base the city off the downtown you're like ah it's okay it's

fine it's nice it's something they have a bloods and crypts problem from what i understand there that's what i've heard i've read i can't imagine a crypt going daughter no yeah the twins are playing oh hey that's a good point i don't know if they have the accent i don't know if that was the right accent anything that might have been north to co it feels like a lot of black people don't have accent like the black people i know in boston don't have boston accents is that right you never need a bot boston guy that's like yeah fuck your mother you fucking weirdo a black guy yeah yeah but you know what they do have is a southern yes they have southern yeah that's interesting yeah it is interesting you don't need a lot of black midwesterners with midwest accents either i feel

yeah well you know i grew up in a black neighborhood and i don't have the accent of a black guy and i feel like a lot of people a lot of whitey kind of have a little flavor sure they grew up with around maybe they they they try it's so white that they try not to do it or it skips a generation something i don't know but anyways great city i had such a great time and the people are so nice of course and i don't know if i'm ready to give the edge to over madison because i still and i've also been in madison where it's beautiful in road bikes and i love that but it's all college though mini apples is a city it's a city all park and it's a big skyscrapers downtown plus the warehouse plus the lake area plus the Beverly Hills i mean

they got it all it's pretty good and i heard this um i think it's called mini ha ha falls which i did not go to it's supposed to be like it's spectacular and so i think one trip to mini ha ha falls would really be something to really change my tits but what a time and that lake is beautiful beautiful lakes people are kayaking beautiful women everywhere but that neighborhood the houses we went in and out of these streets incredible incredible time absolutely loved it great city the burger joint there i'm i'm blanking on it but it's got the burger with the jizz inside and you bite it jizzes on your face i can't think of the name of it it's called money shots or facials or something but it's an old burger place right in the heart of a neighborhood i don't know the jizz burger

but oh that's great also i went back to the restaurant i was there with louis we went to this place monnie carlo that's been open since 1908 right downtown we went there four days in a row him and i mean he could afford to go there the fourth day they bought dinner for us like this is on us what yeah so i went there with sarah anniversary we had there was a nice 90 dollar meal but it was delicious best sam never had in my life 90 dollar well it was the two of us plus uh you know we fell off the wagon it was a whole thing i got you well i'm going to act me in a couple weeks so come out folks oh yeah they were pushing you hard oh good i need the push i'm not selling yeah it was hot uh i had a bonus it was nice oh great great time great week a great club

i mean those crowds are so good i loved it uh minneapolis gal told me i said why is you know everybody's moving austin everybody's moving the fee everybody's moving in new york right you know all these towns are blowing up portland portland's huge now charleston's huge you know uh but i said why is minneapolis not blowing up the city's amazing she goes the cold keeps them out that's the thing it's cold i mean you have like three months a year i mean i thought that like you'd be there in june i've been there in january february it's a pretty much a nightmare i mean you gotta they have the in downtown they have tunnels and bridges and shit but whatever crazy anything got built there it's uh but it's a beautiful city because you got it's it's also a um a hub city too

so it's a place to live delta hub but there's minneapolis back to delt um and then i gotta say this i think we might have dabbled on this we flew from minneapolis straight over to no wait we flew from denver to la but i was in la a couple weeks ago and we stopped in Manhattan beach which is my favorite fucking place on the planet beautiful a little secluded over there which is nice well i'm never going to la the last three times i've done it i've never gone to la again without doing at least one night of Manhattan beach you pop down yeah it's 15 minutes from the airport we literally landed the airport 15 minutes later we're at the beach we got a nice little hotel we swam in the evening we swam in the morning and there was dolphins we're in the ocean four

foot swells we're diving into the waves we're getting into the waves we're letting them crash all over us i feel so spiritual i got my toes up in the waves yes and sarah's like this dolphins i look over this dolphin swimming uh 70 feet from us wow 70s too close i hear they rave 50 yards away i mean they were right there two dolphins jumping out which is a good sign because that means there's not sharks in the area i was right that's what someone told me i don't know the sharks but uh we were swimming with dolphins we raped each other beautiful time in Manhattan beach and get down there if you if you're near la or if you're stopping la swing on over there great place and uh i don't have a story about it other than we swam with dolphins and it felt nice i mean

that's amazing can i just say about those those Manhattan beach at laguna beach or whatever all those uh del re or something like that arena del re yeah all that shit is banana so beautiful so pretty it's like out of a movie it's like hot girls walking around and they jump in their convertible and they have their surfboard hanging out the back it's so cliche can you imagine growing up there as a kid crazy that's your normal reality as a seven-year-old eight-year-old that's insane crazy and i'll say this while we're being bold with cities i came up with this when i was hanging out there los angeles my second favorite city in america it's a great city i love it i like the hiking the ocean the comedy store i love i don't i don't care how the doorman treat you at the comedy store

that's not so great not a fan of that they really give you the business so yeah you're like hey take it easy come on i got some credits you want you want to be like they're like get in the back of the line show your idea you motherfucker and i think they all worship rogan you want to be like this i know joe rogan they're like oh god i'm sorry like she's just like take it easy like it like i'm on tv yeah he's got to walk up showing his number on your phone i got it i can be here that just relax yeah it's a lot but it's so hierarchy over there yeah they're all fired up but i love the store i love hollywood i love laguna beach which i don't isn't la proper but manhattan beach and the bars the restaurants i just i really enjoy being out there the weather of course is perfect

here's the the clinker with la though i love it too it's great but could you live there that car that traffic the taxes are bananas and then like uh you try to build something your house you need 18 permits apparently they fuck you uh like paperwork wise in that city but the taxes are worse in new york i think i think new york state taxes are worse oh really i don't know i think they're pretty bad at departments you can get more for less in la well that's true i was looking at it i could live there i mean i don't want to live there i'm not moving there but yeah and the hobos well we got hobos here so yes so the village by the way is out of control is that right by the seller out of control oh you can't stand there for 10 minutes i mean that's non-stop like i

i don't want to sound like a fucking crazy conservative guy but they gotta round them up and toss them somewhere else yeah well what do you do when it when a hobo goes hey man gonna get a some change and you go no then he starts like dancing on you and stuff you're like i got nothing and then he walks away and two minutes later another hobo comes up and you go i got i got nothing he goes uh you're like i gave something to that guy it's non-stop it's never been worse it's kind of an epidemic just mcdougal street third street and a lot of them are fucking seedy like i feel oh yeah uneasy over there is that one guy the white guy that yells yes that guy's a piece of shit is the guy with the silver crazy stuff the silver thing's weird yeah he's weird and now it's

just more and more plus parkers everyone over there is yelling something at you yeah a lot of yelling it's a bad situation but we gotta wrap this fucking thing up here oh where you at the wife's gonna be home it's fucking we're in an hour in i gotta get to get them uh big weekend as you know we're selling pretty well by the way soho theater so thank you to all the tuesdays that have already bought i mean i can't believe it uh london this friday this saturday if you haven't gotten your tickets or whatever or if you have friends that might want to go please spread the word we're close to sold out for god's sake wow all right it's a small room still and then bergen next week if you're in norway bergen norway and then i'm off the road for a couple weeks i can't wait um

hartford funny bone september 26 through the 28th and then october we kick it all back up again laughs in seattle october 4th and 5th skyline in appleton october 10th through the 12th please come out to that come to one maybe the friday show friday eight o'clock because i gotta hit a bonus because it's not paying me great you'll hit one on saturday i hope so all right well saturday come saturday blue room in springfield missouri burlington brimont new england come up there montreal drive down from montreal october 24th to the 26th and uh dc draft i was coming up in november laugh boss in november 29th and 30th and uh hey our good pal gary veeter recording his album veeter los vegas that is next week september 4th to the 10th no i think it's second to the fifth

second through the fifth or the seventh the day of the weekend maybe the seventh second through the seventh los vegas ghosty veeter i think arie's there burrs in town i think he might come by soter sal volcano it's gonna be a banana's week sal's a bachelor parties that week yes so it's gonna be nuts you don't want to miss this that's the first week of september next week in vegas i'm sad i'm gonna be in wales but uh go to that do not miss it i wanted to be there i'm sad i'm missing he's recording his album so we want to make sure there's fans that go and fucking laugh loud and yes veeter los vegas gonna be a hot it's the first album ever recorded on comedy seller records yeah get in there and then check it out and be there and and then uh if you're around

tonight no i'm at the fat black tonight i'm at the fat black tonight oh nice yeah so come by that new york folk all right i'm in a helium in indianapolis this weekend indianapolis at the helium thursday to saturday then i'm in denver following your heels then i'm at irvine impromptu just got added oh that was huge big room i'm gonna really embarrass myself in there so come out to irvine that's september 13th and 14th irvine la you're always saying when you come to la when you come to la this is it i'm coming la i know irvine's out there but jesus a channel please try to come i'm nervous about it then i got out you know the belly room on the 25th doing kill tony doing a couple other fun shows in uh the los angeles greater area sacramento punchline

adison improv in dalis tejas riverfront bar and grill and chestening michigan tickets available on the second show austin you know i love austin cap city comedy club acme minneapolis let's show me a good time it's not that cold yet lake of aisles spokane nantacoma in washington state roar it might have gotten replaced actually hold on we'll be in that might be the science road dates sunny veil back to california a lot of cali and tampa florida maybe might have gotten replaced as well as santa anna with you know who santa anna winds blowing hot from the north and we were born to ride blue room springfield Missouri and portland helium but i might be going to israel oh nice yeah so we'll see what's what but uh yeah thanks kooks and kaks and kicks and

the whole thing and show your tits at the park uh one of the perks living in new york as you get to see cans all day long don't forget to come to that santa anna new mexico oh yeah december 13th and 14 we're calling it the tuesday's festival ah now we're talking yeah i like it so yeah live pod and uh co-headline thing yes spring all the gays all the chipots all the uber's all the cheese cakes and have a hug and a laugh and a quiff yeah and uh suck their nicks yeah bye oh shit wrong button cry