Tuesdays with Stories! - #452 Bob Swag-It

Episode Date: May 17, 2022

Wooooooo! Joe continues to push and prod Mark about moving to Astoria as Mark recounts his time at Netflix is a Joke Fest - performing at the Greek with Bert Kreischer, going to Dave Chappelle's afterparty, and running in late to his headlining set at the Paramount! Sponsors: - Support the show and get 10% off your first month of online therapy at https://BetterHelp.com/Tuesdays - Head to https://policygenius.com/TUESDAYS to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. - Support the show and get 25% off anything you order at https://LiquidIV.com with promo code: TUESDAYS - Support the show, quit smoking naturally with Füm, AND save 10% by using code TUESDAYS at https://www.breathefum.com/TUESDAYS Subscribe to our Patreon for full video of the show A WEEK EARLY, WEEKLY bonus stuff, and more! www.patreon.com/tuesdays Subscribe to our YouTube channel here: https://youtube.com/c/TuesdayswithStories SUBSCRIBE: https://bit.ly/2ABEe1w

hey mark fake banter for the intro that's all I know how to do great good to be here welcome to Tuesdays with stories hit her in the face with a surfboard and then the duck fell out of his bag surfs up and she didn't even flush knock knock who's there mark Norman and Joe list yeah Tuesdays with stories everybody that's terrible this is supposed to be cheesy my radio is spitting at me hey folks here we are we're back in dinner stuff studio for who knows anymore but we're here we're queer and yeah we're sure we'll get kicked out

hold on I got an idea I'm gonna take this and use the mugs mug Costanza there we go that'll fall and make a big noise we'll move the water just in case it falls mean mugging there we go okay I got a nail in my water because the the wallpaper fell because Shelby put it up and yeah we're here there we are did you did you dye your hair grow it out what goes on it looks different comb it brush it scoop it scoop it I did a thing where I just put my hair in the shower wet it shook it up I curly hair you got to reactivate it's like Chinese food you put some water in it new kid yeah yeah exactly sometimes you get a hair in

your Chinese food that's true yes Corona started Corona isn't it weird that in the beginning I think we've talked about this I'm sure sorry I say that a lot at the beginning of COVID we were saying Corona everyone said Corona and then I would hear people say COVID I'm like how about these assholes that say COVID and then COVID stuck and then now Corona sound you sound like old man with a spoon I saw like a living in Queens I mean Corona we almost went to Corona Thursday that's I think we're Paul Simon's from no he's for his hills the Queen of Corona that's what you're thinking of but we were you know

Thursday here in the city it's nice out again finally beautiful we were washed out this weekend the weather affects me more than I wanted to I know but when it's good it's good but that's what I mean when it's good I'm through the roof I'm go I'm annoyed that we're in a studio it's 65 and sunny we'll get out of here with a little daylight left I hope so but when it's rain I just want to kill myself do you ever just go why don't I kill myself sure I've wondered why you haven't but don't you have a little dick trickle out there the drops are hitting your your window you got a little moody tune on the blower I'll do a moody tune

but dick trickle by the way I think is the name of Tom Cruise and days of thunder is that right I think it's a coach dick no it's Cole trickle there we go trickle but there's a dick involved having a hot trickle you fucks Kidman he fucked a kid man oh man apparently it was balancing well let me move over to here there we go the table sucks everything Shelby bot sucks but his replacement sucks even more so I don't know what did he buy you Chuck sure he bought a prostitute at one point there we go I was in London I'm thinking about dipping over Amsterdam fucking a couple whores why not hey get the red light

anal in you it's a train ride you know is it I think so yeah yeah what are we doing here we got to get out of the studio this place is a death trap fuck it's a suicide wrap you got to get out while you're young tramps like us maybe we're born to run here here I love Green Day but any tits so yes Thursday is beautiful and the weather the rain can be nice I'll go to Seattle if you're in a place where it rains you embrace it when you're in London you're like it's romantic yes but I think the rain it depends it can rain on your your gay pride parade you know it can ruin the day but if you if you got the night off you

got a tomato soup a grilled cheese sandwich a full bush and the rain and a little Clapton it's not so bad you got a movie night or something well it depends on the rain because some rain I like I like running when it's drizzling romantic and films as you know they spray down the street sure nice reflection it's beautiful anytime you've ever seen a nighttime street in a film they wet it down beforehand they always wet it you got a wet it what is like a whale well because it reflects and it looks fake otherwise it looks like shit it does that nasty cement it's gray it's got jizz on it it's no good yeah it's like my asshole

yes so any any jizz so it rained for two days straight though and I'm a walk I need to walk every half an hour I'm just like my life's just wasting away I suck I gotta move but Thursday it was beautiful and I had the whole crew I really think you should move to Queens I don't think you're thinking about it enough we got townhouses we got big things mm Corona a couple times a week I got Chavone Rogers Palufo Ronan sure they all stink at comedy but they seem very nice they're cute kids Chavone I don't get a little overrated but yeah no Chavone is tops he's a he's a bottom if you asked me but you can't win them

all I don't know maybe I'll pop in sometime but you got a hot you got a hot apartment there it's a it's a little kid comedy village it's a comedy village by the way they're all hilarious I have to say Steve Rogers brand new special came out on YouTube it's called before he was super so check that out how do you like that what is that entitled what does that mean I think is Steve Rogers is Captain America's real name which I didn't know for a long time because an adult but before he was super it looks beautiful the jokes are bangers and every comment was like Joe lists that me here Tuesdays for stories Rodgers

Tuesday DDR so that was nice so go check them out these guys are all hilarious it's the young crop and we're over there with smoking cigars in the backyard we call it getting nicked up nicked because nicotine I like I'm all nicked up baby I can't do a cigar too much if I go past the halfway point it really kills my anxiety the nicotine spikes it I read that book things quiz say hello I like a happy but I tend to inhale on accident and that that fucks me up yeah that'll happen once every once in a while you swallow when you go boy I think I'm a different person now big load but anyways it's nice out finally

I was talking about the rain you said something oh we almost went to Corona to get slushes the king of Corona slush you know that guy love it slush but yes the rain can fuck yeah I mean Katrina was pretty rough I don't know if you heard about it I did I did but yeah and then there's this this flood with the the Noah character oh Noah yeah I don't think that's real I don't know I was wondering like there's a couple mosquitoes in there and yeah how do we do the dot divvying up with the two animals was it because it was a male and a female what if there's a trans anteater what do you do there I think so I think

that was before that but I mean it's quite a boat I mean two elephants to two you know cunts to mice to Asian kids it's sure it sounds like Chuck's bedroom on a Saturday yeah definitely the mice in the Asians but I remember I tried to do a bit about this early on and where it was like I watched the documentary they were like in search of Noah's Ark and I'm like I got some bad news boys that was the whole bit Chuck's dying maybe I'll bring it back funny bit and I was 19 I had an overbite I still do yeah no arc bad arc terrible arc it's the only arc you ever hear about other than the three-point arc well then you hear about

the story arc Arch Normand hey that could be something you got two puppies I'm gonna say Lewis okay but is arch and arc the same thing I think those are different I bet they came from a similar and then there's also the onk like my tail no it's a symbol of the hippie kids wear it as a necklace to eat an onk give it a goop I don't know I know Paul and Paul anchor that's close than his anchor steam anchors away oh yeah you know the onk you know it's a famous it's a famous show me on it's it's like a it's a cross but the top is a loop yes a loop a loop think of the you know the Christ cross the top is a big

loop yeah you've seen an oh isn't that Prince isn't that pretty similar to Prince oh yeah formally yeah yeah a bell there what is he now is he back to Prince now he's onk well I know he's dead now he's in the ground he had a good run ass is chaps but aren't all chaps assless I think we talked about this before my ass is chapped my dude I have a serious ass problem really going on for days and this might offend people because people I'll tweet about people like gross just keep this to yourself but I got I don't know what happened if I forgot to wipe or if I let my dad wipe I don't know something happened but I've

had a rash in my asshole for like three days really no more than that like six days is it a rash or is it why you're wiping too hard I haven't peaked down there but something goes on but here's the thing I just tweeted this it's weird when you have a rash in your asshole cuz the only time you get a rash that you just smear feces across you got a rash on your face you wouldn't be like let me rub shit on this every day maybe a Native American that's a trick they would do but yeah you got a point there you're not getting poo poo into the illness yeah it's irrational but and I use I'm a big proponent of Boudreaux's butt paste you

know this product do I I think it's out of Louisiana Boudreaux I thought that when I every time I look at it I think of you I think of calling you and telling about your ass so I've been using it usually this stuff Boudreaux's butt paste it's for children usually I do one swoop and it's gone in like 10 minutes but I don't know if the date has expired on my my BBP but I've been I've been just cramming the whole tube up there I like stick the tube in my ass and have Sarah step on it yeah shoots in there but don't you worry about caulking your crack you don't want to seal that in like a like an old crack in a drywall I

do that's what it's like I got cock in my ass yeah I love a cock in my ass but I'm just saying it it's not good I would I've never used the paste I've I've I've seen the bottle I've seen the tube but I've never I'd be scared of is it an ointment is it a what is it a compound it's an ointment I think you got to free yourself and just admit you've used it I don't I don't know what you're talking about no I just use straight semen I don't I don't need to buy it I could make it the semen's going in your ass it's not straight I'll tell you that good point but the boondro's butt paste it's got a cute little baby on it and it's fun

because you know Sam we have a couple rubber ducks in the shower that were we wanted a arcade and we just left them in the shower so if a kid comes over a house we're ready for it we got those butt paste and a couple of squeaky ducks there you go no is this is it was it a claw game is that where you got the ducks squid game I don't know what it is everyone references it it's fun it's Korean shooting each other in the face oh I love Korean films no diversity but the ducks I forget what they were from but we won some ducks it was like some of the bullshit we're like you get all the tickets and then you give most of them

to a kid but then you get a couple I can't remember the ducks came from quite frankly but we got them in there they're two ducks I make them fuck it's exciting yes fuck duck I love the arcade what what's your go-to arcade I love I'm not a great basketball player but for some reason an arcade I can kill it with that little basketball game yeah well no one's guarding you the hoops a little lower sure poppa shot poppa shot I had one I had one at my house who are you home alone I don't understand you know you're like big you're like Andrew Beckett or whatever that kid's name is you got a trampoline a bunk bed your

finger and a lady was older than you yeah exactly you're leaning down giving her a compass and it just doesn't make any sense I don't understand Chuck's got you know shimmy shimmy cocoa pup shimmy shimmy raw I've got a Triske that reminds me of Matt Wayne he looks like that way I can see that I got a snuggly bug something snuggly bug but yeah that's the poppa shot a whack-a-mole I never got whack-a-mole sucks and you always cheat you had the third person and the guy comes over and he's like I'm gonna have to ask you to leave right right his mole then you fight him yeah yeah yeah whack-a-mole sucks poppa

shots my favorite thing I also love the football thing you whip the football through the hole there's like five yards ten yards 15 yards I always go for 15 I can really get pretty hot and and zing some in there how about the the big punch thing where you punch it and it tells you your pussy that always made me nervous I had Uncle Dale just knew the co he knew how to punch he would just get it and it would be like a man and I'd be like a homo or whatever I got cuck the best thing you can do at an arcade this is what I want to buy once I really strike it rich mm-hmm bubble hockey bubble that's the most fun you

can have a little swingy guys and you it's like it's like foosball but with hockey interesting see now mine would be air hockey I love that air hockey table I love spinning that handle I love the cling cling cling cling good time air hockey is fun but it's so infuriating when they score you score on yourself so often I do love air hockey it's brutal but I can't if I play with my wife well I want to get divorced if she did any kind of lead I'm like I'm going to hit her as hard as I can tonight hit her hit her with the puck I mean it's hockey you're allowed to hit them but true yeah the air hockey what

it's it's it feels like jizzing on your own face when you go and it pink pink goes right into yours oh it's infuriating every play knock hockey with the the wooden one where you have you never played knock hockey never heard of knock it's like a thing you can buy for your house when you're a kid and it's almost like air hockey it's a big wooden table with like the goal same kind of goal you have a little puck it's it's really fun you ever play not I'm gonna get some knock hockey we'll play on the patreon get some knock I don't call it knocky oh man it's really good you have a little tiny hockey stick and you flick

it I wasn't special needs strange toys knock hockey all right I'll check it out what about bumper pool bumper pool and I got him hearing noises outside hey folks Tuesdays with stories is sponsored by better help online therapy many people are burned out without even knowing it one of them sitting next to me symptoms can include lack of motivation feeling helpless or trapped detachment fatigue or more and more boys riff about times you've felt burned out I feel I feel burned out right this second I mean I'm talking about I'm like I'm going to try to cancel the pot I was like I think we got three in the can don't worry we

don't have any in the can my mother's calling me right this moment I'm on my way to London town I mean I am exhausted I did two podcasts today I got a flight a transatlantic flight coming up right now I am burnt out fortunately I have a therapist and boy is he helpful we associate burnout with work but that's not the only cause lots of other stuff can do it relationships all that good stuff you gotta you therapy I love therapy it changed my whole life Alan's number one you can find a therapist at better help it is customized online therapy that offers video phone and even live chat session sessions with your

therapist you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to it is much more affordable than in-person therapy and you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours Tuesdays with stories listeners get 10% off their first month at better help dot com slash Tuesdays that is B E T T E R H E L P dot com slash Tuesdays Tuesdays with stories is also thrilled to be welcoming a new sponsor policy genius here if someone relies on you financially a child apparent or even a podcast partner life insurance gives you peace of mind that they have finished a financial cushion if something happens to you

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Tuesdays to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save that's policy genius dot com slash Tuesdays hey nice you know as fun as like a mutant Ninja Turtles that you play those games the arcade we get four people in there yeah that was fun I just got the Simpsons one oh my god what is this something's on free matching helmets wrong with you I wonder if you're in a what do you call that one when you're in arrested development you know what you think all right I'll stay with 13 yeah dick never grew I have no pubes and I like toys I've spent time looking at the bubble hockey because you can

design your own you can I can have like Bruins versus the Canadians and all this stuff I think my wife does not want me to get it because it's like an off downstairs like an office and I'm like we could have fucking seven people in there playing bubble that's exciting that might lure you in I feel like maybe you get some toys down there I'll come play doesn't Queens just feel cool at Brooklyn I Brooklyn hey the Cosby show the Nets whatever Queens is like you know yeah I've row swingers remember he's got the Queens really selling me here Costanzas they have Fevro got to get near that fab Queens Queens good so well

it's weird that Brooklyn was Kings County and they just that went away I think it's still Kings County well why was it it was Queens Kings that's a perfect little boom boom sure why they changed the Brooklyn give that a goob they're juxtaposed her I don't know Brooklyn Brooklyn and then what the hell's I think Bronx is us is a Dutch word for anal I don't know the Bronx yes touch the mainland why did change to Brooklyn lengthy yes why why are you reading do it quick edit in your head yes big edit button I get to find the right keep talking all right all right well Chuck says we should take over here

well where you been I mean I've been everywhere since 1975 I don't know the last time we recorded was it last week I can't even remember yeah was I think we actually got one in the can last week oh nice oh yeah you must leave left the next day every time I hear I know I'm freaking out here I can't get comfortable I don't know why we didn't go to the other one I can't see Peter we're paying for this we can get out of it we can get out of it we gotta talk to somebody by the way a woman of a female gay was like hey I'm in law what do you call it real estate law she's like to get you out of that oh yeah and I was like hey

so it's a tits and we'll hire you yes tits so just got back from LA did the Netflix Fest pretty exciting it's a whirlwind although I gotta tell you I might be done with Fess really well getting your head huh Maril oh well he hates him but anything that's fun he hates they're fun it's a good time look if we go to Skankfest that's one thing the whole gang but this is like everybody people you want to see people you don't want to see and it's just a lot of like what are you doing tonight what do you got tonight you know the whole bullshit and the after-party and it feels like a lot of obligations that

you know you said you like to get up and walk yes I tell I feel in the fest I'm like am I stuck here now can I go can I leave get a badge a lanyard it's too much yeah I hear you I haven't been to a fest since the 80 I mean like Skankfest that's fun Houston that was the last that was the only festival I've been to since COVID wow before that I think it was what's it called crab apple what's it called moon tower yes crab apple is not a bad festival I like that Simpson's character Kerbopple sorry but yeah so good time had what the cool thing is you get to do these shows I did a Z's and friends first night and that's

me Nate Gerrard Carmichael the three best friends yeah the old gang and you know Bo Burnham's hovering around he's seven foot five him and him and Carmichael are like this and it's at the Orpheum it's sold out there's so many beautiful theaters in that town in LA yes well that was the movie capital tensile town and just a great great old time hung out with Nate and then you're like oh there's Seth Rogan's is walking around his Nick Kroll walking around you know and I talked to Rory Scoville for half an hour I love Rory I haven't seen Rory in years I take it all back I love a fest yes this is like this sounds amazing Rory

I mean you get you get a seat next to Rory Scoville you sit right in there you got that right fatty I can take a leave who Nate ah yeah he's a very cold but good times Nate's the FaceTime with Seinfeld he's easy he's in a he's on another level that guy is just he's famous I know he responds to me four days later it hurts my feelings that's what he does he's busy and yeah next night what else do we do I did uh I did the Greek with Bert the Greek now tell me about the Greek because I always know about the the movie is the first time ever heard of the Greek so this is a famous theater I know theaters I love

theaters I know the Palladium the clash the whole thing that was in London I think though I'll do you about the Greek this is not theater this is ampha oh yeah theater hmm what is an amp is it amp e amp you ramp up it is an I in there yeah it's amp amp amp a theater amp amp a theater amp a theater I got empathy but yeah it was it was fucking up that was the crown jewel I mean I did some great shows the Palladium you did the Palladium we're talking to the Palladium the Palladium we're talking yeah I did the Palladium and you know Neil Brennan fortune-feebster this sounds insane we're talking about you're

done with festivals I take it back well the problem was I got hammered every night and you'll be a blackout you wake up at four you're like I hate myself I gotta get my life together I haven't written a joke or a tweet in five years and but no that's that's on me yes we're drinking too much but great time I take it back the fest was amazing they did end up canceling a lot of shows but they spread it too thin I mean it's Kevin Hart it's Dave Chappelle it's Bill Burr it's Jimmy Carr it's all these wild all these you know mega stars New York needs a real festival not the horse that New York Festival where it's just they just

slap festival on every show there's no epic epic epic epic epic epic epic epic epic epic there's no epic there's no epic center right they need a that this sounds incredible it was pretty wild and it's the bowl it's the forum Mulaney did the forum you know it's in the forum to the forum and the bowl he's huge baby he's huge he's got his little kid out there but pretty cool I think there's eight million people in that town so I guess you can do a lot of it but the the slap or the tackle was the buzz of the fest the chappell the chappell tackle oh the chappell tackle big buzz sometimes I just skip stories

I go okay you got tackled all right it's a couple school shootings I blew past yeah like I'll get the next one I don't know why I just some crazy guy ran up he tried to tackle them to beat the shit out of him like right the news is like a bus if you don't catch it I'll get the next one yeah exactly I go okay Chappell got tackled the guy was crazy right yeah he had a gun knife which I don't get there was a fake gun but a real knife he was he was upset because Dave Chappell I guess was against some kind of like lower income housing situation that's what it was yeah and I think the guy's mom was like forced out

not specifically by the Dave Chappell one but just in general he's against the fact that she went against that yeah this horrible thing happened to my mom I'll tackle this comedian that's what Chappell said he said I spoke to him afterwards oh wow that's what he told me I like to speaking me to rare everything online and fighting it's good to talk to fucking people again remember that what a concept yeah but yeah polite no pulled the bowl that was at the bowl and apparently you know they all stop the guy you saw the guy's arm it looked like a fucking pretzel you see the guy's arm I saw his arm I saw his face

crazy arm I was like they could they could get into trouble for that they could know if you if you strike first it's all anal on deck you beat him as a ganged up I don't know yeah I don't think so I don't know we're gonna see buster rhymes yeah yeah Jamie Foxx and a cowboy head I think you and John Stewart stomped his ass if I didn't have power I think they could get in trouble they're celebrities they're multi-millionaire celebrities what's he gonna who's he gonna hire they'll get they'll get you know the Kardashian father in there and one of them yeah but yeah they beat the fuck out I kind of like that they beat

the shit out of the guy I'm not a vinyl like violence but like hey hey I think we live in this like yeah social media world where like you can say whatever you want so I like when there's a little consequence well yeah I mean if we don't think if you was tweeting but once you attack he committed a crime and you beat the shit out of them and throw them throw them down the flight of stairs or two yeah a weapon that's that's also like extra fucked up yeah that is what I saw a bunch of people tweeting like Chappelle made a trans joke right after it's like he got attacked isn't that the problem here not the trans joke you

plant corn you get corn good band you know I mean I disagree wholeheartedly I hate that band I hate that whole area that genre crazy town and looks like a corner looks like a corn guy he plays ball in his living room and listens to corn I have one secret dreadlock that I put down the back of my shirt I bet you got a big K tattoo on your hip yeah hate the band but yeah I take it back fun fact and the Greek was amazing here's the Greek tell me what the Greek I don't know about the Greek it's anal it's basically red rocks in LA it's outside it's outdoors oh yeah but it's in the Griffith Park no kidding yeah and

it's spent a million hours in Griffith Park oh it's in there fatty you must have missed it because it's a big campus no kidding I love puss and it was really great you show up Bert not only does Bert obviously he's blowing up he sold it all out at 6500 seats not only is he at this big icon mogul comedy guy he just knows how to throw a party knows how to throw a show yes you show up it's catered he's like have you had scopa it's the best restaurant in LA I'm like I've never heard of scopa Chris scopa and I was like no and he ate the food the food's unbelievable it's me and Sam so he put Sam on the show so now I got a buddy so

that's the show the three of you it's Dave Williamson Sam me Bert I don't know Dave but that sounds like a hell of a time great guy he's Bert's kind of guy there opens for him everywhere hell of a barbecue guy check him out but you show up to the Greek it's a beautiful day in LA you're in Griffith Park I'm with Sam it's weird seeing him in the sunshine and then you go down the bowels and it's all these posters everybody's played there and the food was incredible then he's like all right we got to go do IVs now we're getting IVs to to prepare for the drinking that will commence I think the IV is a bad look I'm just gonna come right

out and say what's wrong with me you look like maniacs to me I'm looking at it going Jesus Christ oh we're pumping ourselves full of steroids hgmt hgtv all this stuff HIV drip yeah it's good stuff what it creeps me out I don't like IVs you're strange it feels like the needle thing is gross it feels like X machina I'm like what I don't know what are you guys motley crew it's a show to do I don't understand the IVs it's a crazy look but it's all health you're getting good vitamins it's like pumping shit India but it's health so you can drink all night yeah see even out I guess so I don't know it's a crazy thing to

get an IV there's a needle going in your arm there's a Jamaican lady with scrubs on saying oh love whatever but it's it's all love good stuff it's all pipes all right so we get the IVs and I freak out I hate the needle but you want that good going in you well and then of course you go out there he booked a mariachi band to open it up because it was Cinco de Mayo so they were like a like a punk rock mariachi they got the Mexican wrestler mask on that's hot I seen I used to watch the only point I've watched was a day of the dead I love that make it when I see a woman with like a skull yes flowers it's just really sexy to me I want to

get blown by a skull lady skull fuck I like that love dead people I see them so yeah great show Dave killed Sam killed fun time then Bert goes out there and you get to go we were all hanging out backstage I got a tequila my hand I got my arm around Sam I'm jerking off Dave and Bert walks out and Dave goes wait till he takes the shirt off wait for it wait for it you know he goes out there they're going nuts and then sure comes off they all stand up beach balls fireworks the whole thing was insane and he just rocked it it was incredible what a show good times wow and so what do you guys go out in the crowd you side stage do you

watch the whole thing I got some videos maybe I'll send it to you there see dog but you watch half of it you go get another drink you hit catering again you pocket some granola bars and you steal a few craft services and you go back out at the end he brings you back out he's smoking a joint we all take photos it was really something that sounds fun by the way God bless anybody that sits and watches comedy for an hour cuz I'll go to shows I'm like here we go I'm gonna really watch the show in eight minutes and I'm like I saw a smoothie down there can I get a smoothie around it's very difficult it's tough

and people want to go they wait in line they they like scalp tickets they they tackle people they do all this stuff to get in and we can get we can make about 11 minutes or like I got it yeah go so God bless you thank you everybody that comes out to shows your number one so what happens after the Greek you guys go out we're talking to bar what are we talking well of course Bert rented the Greek so we have an after party at the Greek outside you can see the trees the mountains the beautiful LA sky and it's open bar and it's more food I gained 19 pounds I can see yeah I really like it a lot of layers and you know you're

hanging out there I'm drunk and I'm like oh there's a dr. Drew oh there's that Dr. Dre Dr. Drew Drew yeah big difference both hit their wife and then you see who else celebrities there fun times got drunk I don't know how I got home and poor Sam had to do his letterman taping the next day and he was all banged up well he had the IV IV yeah so good times the next day hosted at the Palladium hosted the Palladium what's the Palladium show take me through the Palladium I'm insane here's the clinker the Palladium is where for those who don't know that's where she pelted age of spin fun fact I don't even ever get

heard of that special what's out there that was one of the Netflix one yeah like seven in three days it's all a blur age of spin good band I remember birds the bird one yeah man it was in that mix bird box oh that sucks what an awful fucking movie did really good numbers but yeah just bad for a long time I thought the clash was there but I think it's the London Palladium you can do a double check with the London also right a lot of Palladiums yeah what does Palladium mean what is that man I think it's a stadium and then there's Palace Palace stadium it's a Palladium Palladium

interesting it says clash live at New York City Palladium oh we got one here well that's a concept but like the photo from the cover of London call look up London calling album cover photo let's see location maybe it's LA I got the Brooklyn shit too like it's London so anyways the back to the Palladium has a you know it's a beautiful venue and then they have an outdoor area so of course I had to host the outdoor but it was actually pretty good a lot of gays a lot of gays although I had a tough one I did a joke and a lady and her husband or someone was in a wheelchair okay and they they wheeled off after like

two jokes I was like that's not good not good when you walk the handicap guy yeah yeah but then I got a message later like you need to educate yourself on these a handicap jokes and all that I was like really maybe you need to educate yourself on comedy I'm doing jokes I can't do the thing that you have a problem with but I talked about trans for 17 minutes yeah I gotta say like if you're it have to leave the comedy show it's not on the comic right good point that's if you're offended I mean if you're leaving because the comic sucks and they're boss or whatever and you're like I don't like this fair even that is on

you yeah because you don't like I mean if everyone's killing and you're not laughing it's on you yeah well the good news to me it's you're the sense you need to change your ways yeah why do I have to educate I have to educate myself to adapt to what you think don't you don't you find that's completely self-centered that would make more sense in a debate if you were like having a conversation at a coffee shop and the person was like you think that everyone with AIDS is you know Asian Asian you got to educate yourself right because it's not true yes yes need an education but the jokes don't have to be true

they're jokes they're jokes yeah but she was like I can't believe you did that we came out for a fun show and now we leave feeling bad and I'm like I don't know I got to know your thing I don't know your thing I'm just doing what I wrote that happens at movies all the time 80% of the movies I've seen I leave feeling bad I'm like that sucked I wasted my money I want to kill myself yeah yeah that's what's gonna happen when my movie comes out right yes I got the London calling oh New York City palladium New York City play we don't have a palladium anymore we got rid of ours yeah we get rid of everything Copacabana the palladium the

other thing what was the one East Fillmore East Fillmore East the two towers all gone but yeah so so I got the LL by the handicapped lady which is thank God he's in a wheelchair he couldn't get on stage and try to stab me so who's the show is it Mark Norman and friends why are you hosting what is this I don't think anyone else wanted to do it and I was like I'll take the gig fucking it was it was a hotline it was Sam Jay Neil Brennan fortune-fiemster Steph Tolev and I can't remember somebody else that I'm gonna get in trouble but Jimmy Carr is hanging out with him he's the coolest man Jimmy Carr you see wolf out

there saw wolf out there love the wolf went to the after the Chappelle tackle I went to the Chappelle after party I was the only white guy there and Michelle wolf was the only white lady and we high-fived and it was a white hand on hand and then I think I got somebody stole my wallet wow what a time how long were you there for I was there five full days and I gained nine pounds I lost 20 brain cells and my virginity it was a wild time did I did an urban show Ian Laura and friends it was me Wilson Vince a couple other cats I was the white guy on that show that was fine I love an urban show

LA urban to these are south-central knuckleheads LA urban that is happening LA urban yes LA is urban you got that right outfitters wow and yeah fun time and we did the queue of the the yabba-dabba-doo after oh yeah but I'm a dude this guy Reggie will and Ian and me so I got to make every black joke and the black people love it you know I'm like oh there goes the neighborhood you know you guys look like an evolution show I've gone in and they're loving it wow alopecia this and Rodney King that good times that's good times good times great oldies 30 years ago wow Rodney King about that yeah 30 we're getting old

30 years wow can we all get along it's very very strange crazy Rodney call in is he alive I think he died I think he died that night I think he was still cooking now he was alive because then Raymond Reggie Denny sat next to each other that was the can't we get along I love Denny's which yeah Danny had a tough tough ride by the way that Reginald Denny like has changed my whole life like my fear now on the subway which we got to talk about our incident with Reginald Denny was in the 18-wheeler they pulled him out and threw a brick in his face and danced over him oh yeah then they pulled his pants down and spray painted his

dick that might have been a different guy wait a minute I didn't know that was part of it and then a guy saved him Katie Turr's dad here was he Katie Turr on MSNBC her dad was the helicopter pilot he swooped down he was the OJ pilot and the Reginald Denny pilot and now he's trans now he's a woman he looks just like Katie Turr who's got huge cans that's terrible wow I've never heard of this Turr boy you know the whole what do you what do you got a podcast about Turr well I like Katie Turr she's very attractive her dad they didn't talk for years okay it was a whole thing well she's a woman now or a man now Katie Turr has

always been a woman I she's got huge cans she's on MSNBC I read her book fascinating lady so she's a Turr but okay her dad was a helicopter pilot and he was the one that found OJ and followed him oh thank God I wasn't Kobe but that was two years after the Reginald Denny they went down to you know Crenshaw and what's the French word there croissant no cross what was the two streets down there I think it's French French south-central Crenshaw and Highland I think it's French to Wenger no what's the intersection it was Crenshaw and live Madeline Madeline oh good good good paper la Ferrari Ferrari that's

toast why are you typing with one finger you jackass you got a hand on your car you got two hands you weirdo I don't really know that you can't type look up Reginald Denny Crenshaw it's a it's a French street it's the big street down there I will tell her Napoleon the place to be shit and all Denny Crenshaw and it doesn't matter it doesn't matter we'll get they found him you remember Reginald Denny he was driving through they were grabbing all the whites they pulled him out they fucking beat the she's a white guy okay they threw a brick in his face and the guy dances they were watching as

a kid being like oh my god this is gonna happen to me they love dancing and now I'm on the subway and Cooke's getting come up to you and I'm like oh my god Reginald Denny I'm gonna hit with a brick so he's alive he might be dead now he was all fucked up but that it was then it was him and Rodney did a PSA and then Jim Carrey and David Allen Greer did it on Living Colors oh wow yeah during the LA the riots of 1992 Reginald Denny a white truck driver was stopped at a traffic light at the intersection of Florence and South Normandy Avenue Normandy I knew it was French something Normandy the bad Normandy yes

Normandy Normandy I know I'm right here I should have triggered it this could be a sketch we could have Chris Allen pull you out and hit you with a rock yeah but it was right painted his dick that might have been a different guy there was another guy they pull his pants down and spray paint them all it's really horrible that doesn't seem so bad but all it was horrible what was happening to them also I might have sure Rodney got the shit beat out of them so he was just there was just a white guy there he's a white guy beat him up they were pulling people out of the intersection chasing all the people but

he didn't have a radio in his truck and he took the same shortcut every year to avoid the highway so he had no idea but if he had a radio they'd be like hey there's a huge riot going on so he just drove straight into a riot wow video video Denny so then Rodney this is like how crazy and living color was so they had all this stuff and then Rodney and Reginald got together and they that that was the why can't we all just get along and they both they're all fucking dinged up because they both had the shit beat out of them one by a group of cops who got off and one by a group of guys who I

did I don't know if they ever caught them I don't either I can't remember but but so then Turr come in Katie Turr's dad it can look up his name I forget his name Hank Henry silly swampy Samsonite he was the helicopter pilot who swooped down and then a random black guy from the neighborhood was watching the news and went I got to get down there and he went and scooped up Reginald and rushed into the hospital he's a hero everybody should know this guy's name you see he went down there and was like let's get him out of there but Reginald keeps getting up and walk trying to walk and he's like falling down it's really a

heinous scene as is the Rodney I don't want to make it sound like I heard they put a mag light up this pooper yeah that one is also heinous I don't want to sound like whatever you're a kid you see I'm a late guy of course yes of course we relate to the Rodney as Americans did so Katie so a guy swooped down in a helicopter to stop the fight no he was just filming the thing he was like exposing them he was just the camera he's at the news guy Zoe Turr that's the random guy that's the holocaust yeah that's the helicopter what's his name again Hannah Zoe that's his name now her name

Robert Robert Robert Robert that's my middle name Albert so who's Katie Katie's his daughter did she hit hit Reginald Katie was like 11 then she's our age what but you're nice said again oh everything I'm saying is horrible I'm just I'm just I'm just sexualizing this newscaster I'm not saying his pronouns properly I'm relating to the white victims and not the black I'm sorry I think you're fine I think you're fine we all got to get along what can we see Turr's cans is the question I mean well show the kids really on his Hallie Jackson I love all newscast and ladies because they're all souped up by the way

I'm gonna get 300 tweets being like stop watching MSNBC you piece of shit I'm watching for the girls blow me and the news I read up for the articles but yeah the newscast ladies are hot cuz they're buttoned up and you just picture I'm getting railed in a subway car they're all made up to giving you infrared Hallie Jackson's the hottest one Hallie Jackson's my number one I love L Jackson out Jackson's great oh good egg good guy but anyways I could just I'm it was all very scary and crazy but let's talk about the cook that got in your face all pipes told you the cooks what cook don't you remember how can you

not remember it's all I think about all I talk about is the cooks it's crazy you're dismissing you're like you don't know what you're talking about I won't take the subway I'm riding my bike I'm doing it 40,000 steps a day was this the night fight oh the cook with us the cook you got the subway I never take the subway I'm scared we need a Batman so we're on the D train Batman would be great we're whispering of escapades out on the D train and then I'm like oh my god I can't believe this at 7 p.m. the Sun has gone down we ride together yeah we're chatting where do we wear a mask not wear a mask I got it below my tits

sure then I see I look we're at the end of the train I look through the car yeah I see a cuckoo-looking guy coming and behind him there's like a blonde woman like running right tell she was in distress I went cook alert cook alert heads up cook and then the door slides that sound of a subway door opening it's never a good situation now it's like the Warriors something's going down you hear that yeah you can hear the track below you it gets louder and then we kind of split I went I moved back as we were standing I never sit anymore because then just stand over you know they'll stand so I move this way we parted like the

Red Sea yes he just picked you to go to he picked me I was I'm shorter he went right in the face and said give me money I want money he got an inch away I can smell his hot cheeto breath and he was like I need money and I was like a credit card guy I like Venmo I wanted to get behind him so you could push him he looked like hell I mean he had a trench coat on that was filthy and a kooky hat with the weird straggly hair coming out of there he had the fucked up shoes and he's like I need money and I'm like I don't know what to tell you there you know I'm strapped right now I got nothing in a bad month inflation Biden

Putin and he just stayed there he would just stay there he looked at me so I just I said fucking I'm looking back I knew I had you behind me Adam I was right behind him by the way I had like a fistful of money out he never turned to me I was like I look like fucking Fredo when he's trying to get the gun I was like just money flying everywhere sure and I was ready to give him 38 bucks that I had on me and a debit card no he was right in there he knew I was the injured elk or the antelope he said saw something in me I'm weak but we did the stare off a Mexican stare off and he eventually moved on to some sad old guy

think I moved down and then he said everyone's treat me like I'm the boogie man I've never given the boogie man five bucks before true true and the boogie man is scary we're scared of you you are the boogie man you are and then we he went down the other end and then like you kind of move on our hearts are racing we're kissing on the lips it was like we never saw we came together after that and hugging yes and we look down there and then there's just an old old asshole who looked like he was 70 he's like sitting like this and the guys just standing over him like give me money they were like I want money good he's on

him now let's beat it we got the hell out of there he killed that old guy but you know you can't win them all but it was it was terrible this way you can't sit they'll no sit corner you yeah you got to stand stand up for your your rights and we got the hell out of there but it sucks because you're all worried about kooks I try to talk you off a ledge yeah you'll be fine and city's not that bad and then ping-pong right there in my ass do you see do you see what I mean and then what a night we went over to the VU we went downstairs what a night we got weird double wings double fries it was Ari storytelling show he was

freaking out Louis CK Joe de Rosa Bobby Kelly oh yeah what a nice on Patton Patton was there Ari story show and they all had a great time we got the wings yeah we really really hung there was a good hang well last de Rosa his open killed me he's a funny funny Egyptian how good is that opener about the beacon oh yeah basically went to the beacon beautiful and Chris D sold it out Bobby went to the beacon I see Bobby Kelly goes to the beacon Eddie Vedder yes oh that's right next night Chris D is there and so Bobby calls de Rosa and goes I got I want to kill myself I'm sitting in a theater I'm doing I'm working side

splitters it's half full right I'm watching Eddie Vedder in a room that Chris D's about to do and they sold it out and de Rosa goes Bobby I'm going to the show because I'm catering it de Rosa's catering Chris D's after party that stings but hey what do you get you open a fucking sandwich shop you chuch what do you what do you think's gonna happen is that a good gig for a sandwich shop owner catering the beacon not bad silver lining but what a what a night other than the the kook and then of course I just ran to 6th Avenue and dove in the hood of a cab and take me home

yeah good time that was a great night what a night now I got another humdinger I gotta tell you about two things how we doing we all right let me see I timed 46 all right perfect I'll get both of these right up my asshole here Tuesday stores is brought to you by liquid IV love liquid IV whether you're at the beach gym sweat lodge anywhere you need to hydrate make sure to bring liquid IV whoo these guys sent me a bowload of this stuff and I swear to God I use it every day I just start the day off with it why not hydrate get it going and you know I like to booze too so might as well get a kickstart on that hydration it

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fume dot com slash Tuesdays and use promo code Tuesdays you are going to save 10% off your first order you're gonna save on the cigarettes to that you're not buying and save on initial purchase of fume that's 10% off your entire order when you head to B R E A T H E F U M dot com slash Tuesdays and use promo code Tuesdays thank you LeBron so first off I want to say after the LA Fest that flicks is a joke I jumped on a flight to Denver oh the mile hi yes Bob Denver and jumped on a flight two-hour flight easy peasy in Denver just so many great memories in that city we did the Ari show we hung out we did other things she

touched my leg exactly one in a million and so you're saying there's a chance so we get to Denver yeah and I'm doing the Paramount so this is our theater in Denver by the way all these theaters of the same names Paramount in Austin Paramount Theater Palladium Palladium Palladium not to mention the Orpheums Orpheums everywhere I think there's only like seven people Warner had a theater oh yeah I think there's like seven people had theaters it's all pipes it's all like monopolies is that right so it's all like surviving places I don't think they're attached I think there's like Paramount it sounds big and regal but I think back

in the day I see and so they just carried over the name I think okay well yeah so about the Paramount what now this is big because Denver Comedy Works great club Denver is one of the best comedy towns I mean there's a reason 18 million people have done specials in Denver sure it's like Schumer Rogan Atel Geraldo Dana Gould Demetri Martin the list goes anal so I'm at the Paramount which is exciting because I was like I was a comedy works guy just getting into the comedy works is exciting that was a big deal big deal and I was doing comedy works 2019 Nate Burgessy pre-benchant was at the Paramount he goes come visit

come say hello and I was like wow he's on the marquee who does the Paramount what do you Seinfeld he a Cosby am I sleepy and we go and now I'm doing it it's now I'm driving the bus exactly I'm Batman it's just fucking nuts to go from one to the other like you you see Nate they're like what how could you sell these this ticket amount how could you fill this up it's a beautiful theater chandelier red curtain the whole thing box seats and I'll box you know a stage theater works sure and now I'm there so it's fun to progress Jerry very exciting progressive sure so insurance yes yes Geico Liberty Liberty there's

another one Aflac Aflac I don't understand all but they it's fine let's you know commercials work and they work but you need come right like insurance yeah I bought a car like you need to get insurance and I was like I guess I'll go Geico I go Geico in your head you think you're not watching you don't give a shit right but it's up there living in there how about this one we are farmers but up up up up up up up yeah farmers only alright so anyway so take me through it you're flying in you're doing the theater you got an opener you excited do you get nervous is it like the old days now because now

it's like you don't have another crack at it you're just doing one show right one show in and out so a couple things first of all Yamanica former guest was was at the comedy works she goes hey I see her at the the theater why don't you pop by and do five on my show I said sure that sounds great so now you get to do you get the best of both queefs love the pop and then you see the staff that's one of those staffs they hang out they want you to hang out I always feel bad there I always feel like everyone hates me because I don't hang out totally it's Logan it's Tanya it's a Brent Brent Tobler all these guys are there and so the

Paramount was really something special I hit up this guy David Rodriguez who runs a place called the comedy for it great guy great comic yeah he couldn't do it and I hit up Sam talent he couldn't do it and then I they all gave me this one guy you got to use this guy and I was like okay if you guys reckon I'll use him Elliot Wolsey I might be saying that wrong look it's Elliot Gould ah yes mash so he he shows up he's a handsome six foot eight son of an onion and I get to the theater now how not this is this is where it gets touching we sold it out first off I want to really play by play this I'm at the hotel the hotel is

a 11 minute walk to the theater so it's like perfect I'll walk it cooks cooks a little bit but these aren't New York they're Denver cooks they're they're all hippy-dippy freewheeling man I just need a joint and a smile or whatever Denver's crazy especially on 16th Street that's about the 16th Street cooks yeah yeah so I get out there and I'm late you know they want you there you know you gotta get there it's 6 6 30 it's like 6 31 but I still got an 11-minute walk so I'm like shit I'm gonna be a little late that's 642 so I get out of the shower I run down there and I'm running down 16th Street and I start to get closer you see

the Paramount the big the big sign there and you're like oh man there's a line around the block I run up I know it's so cool I'm in my jacket I'm sweating from the shower it didn't take and I'm running in and they all go mark they all turn around they go Norman and I go I gotta get through I'm late and I cut through security grabs me I go I'm on the show and they go he's on the show he's on the show they're all pointing at me you are the show you're the show I'm the show the marquee Norman the openers on the show you are the show the show must go on so the lights twinkling we got a twinkle I love a twinkle so

the seas part and now I'm in the lobby area you know what I'm trying to find the backstage and you know welcome to the lobby how does that go we're all going to the lobby lobbyists yes that's it let's all go and have ourselves a snack I don't fully understand what a lobbyist is they make you want to vote away or something I don't get it either yeah I don't get it hotel lobby smoking they smoke cigarettes second hand I don't know you're in the lobby I'm in the lobby don't you know this is insane you don't want to go to the stage door at the stage door I I hate I got to look up the guy's name I have a

contact I look that up I didn't want to go through my emails and you push search it never works you go Paramount Theater and nothing comes up I don't know how that works but so I'm in the lobby I just I'm looking for a backstage entrance or maybe a side door I can't find anything and everybody's going photo photo I'm taking all these photos but you take one photo you take 90 I know I've never been so happy and embarrassed for a person at the exact same time it was embarrassing what are you doing to the stage door you did the knock it was a little bit hey you must be mark it was impromptu I wasn't thinking I'm sweating

and it was a little endearing you know I'm like oh that guy in the lobby and look there he is he's ugly whatever and then I open the showroom door here's the theater I just run down the aisle everybody's gonna get kicked out sorry I'm getting excited everybody's going look there he is there I'm running down the aisle I jump up on the stage I do a barrel roll and I run backstage oh my god it was exciting here's the clinker you get backstage I go welcome how are you do you need anything blah blah blah and I see a big white box in the green room I go I love box come in it and I open it it's a king cake what's a

king cake it's a New Orleans tradition it was a nice gesture they put some thought into it he's from New Orleans he's gay it's a cake with icing and jizz and I'm sorry I don't know what the king cake Normandy is a little is a little toy baby and there's a baby in there what yeah I knew you'd hate it a white box as a baby they don't like abortion tell me about it so there's a baby in it there's a little plastic baby they put right in there and they cook it and then you whoever gets the baby has to buy the next cake it's a fun little tradition sounds stupid but really sweet everything sounds stupid the

first time we're talking chocolate vanilla look religious people kneel and sing and blow kids so it's all pipes yeah I don't care for any of those activities up for the last one sure that's a good one so they get your cake I love the gift giving I love it they give you a thing yeah they give you a thing there's there's your writers back there this tequila this jerky and then there's a record player and I go they all put a record on so now I'm playing Frank Sinatra I'm in the green room the opener comes in we we finagle we hug we talk we chitchat I got a video guy you gotta have a video guy he's there he's

excited and just sells out and the opener kills Elliot kills it wait I'll come out it's the hottest set of my life and it just is a man you start thinking like all the work you do all the lights then you were just at the Greek you're just in LA you're just on a flight you're just running down the street it was really something did a Q&A after had the set of my life ran over to the Denver comedy works saw yamanica she threw me up kind of had a bad set it's fun you got your people then you go to the same jokes for your non people and they're like who are you why do we care blow me kill yourself so that's comedy for you and

then we hung out all night and I went to the bar after which a huge mistake and I got no sleep but we're here and we're queer what night was this Saturday night wow Saturday night Paramount Theater name and lights mile-high city unbelievable and we started at the bottom the bottom walked into a place and you said hi my name's mark I'm an idiot I want to go on I'm a piece of shit my father hates me can I just tell some jokes for two minutes and then you go up and they go God this guy sucks I'll never be anything yeah get out of here and then yeah Paramount Fat Crissel you do I mean Fat Crissel said it well he said uh you

went to New York and it was like a video game where you played on the hardest level and you won yes you know I never said that I never said that Crissel he said you said it too I'm saying you too you started we all started the bottom I think that you said it too and I'm like don't get me credit for that oh no Chris like to quote but yeah quote but yeah so it was all but then here's the clinker on the flight flight clinker we got a flight home it says is a four hour and changer here this is out of Denver so get on the flight and you know Netflix these festivals they give you a swag bag you know it's a condom it's

chapstick it's a butt plug it's a rape kit whatever it is it's wagon so Bob swag it yeah so we uh I get on the flight I'm wearing the Netflix is a joke shirt just because I need I'm out of a suitcase it's all pipes it's all jizz on it's all dirty you know so I throw on the new shirt and this guy's is staring at me and I'm like hungover you know I'm on no such want to lay there and then die on this flight and this guy is sitting next to me he goes what do you do and I go ah you know I'm a mailman or whatever and he goes says artist on your shirt oh you an artist I hate these people I hate these people yeah I'm a

painter I do impressionist paintings and nudes and he goes are you an artist I go yeah I'm a video guy I just I just have the shirt I shoot the artist that was my move I basically I was I'm Chuck I fuck fat chicks I live in a house with video games and can you shoot the whales yeah so and he's like oh yeah and this lady behind me goes don't listen oh he's lying he's kind of a big deal oh and I go I look back and I go what are you doing what an asshole I know but she's laughing she's like he's she's like he just did the Greek with Bert Kreischer I'm like shut the fuck up you come guzzling whore Jesus but this

guy's like whoa the Greek with bread bread Christ and I go I'm a video guy AV club you know audio video that's a good thing to say because nobody cares about a video guy nobody wants to talk to them nobody wants to get to know them you edit a podcast you upload videos you have a bad back right this shit about them got into a car accident Steve Dave but yeah so I don't know what that is by the way that don't don't ask but yeah the video thing is tough it's good because you're there it puts you it's a reason why you're there but it also is boring yes you know so worthless but yes totally and so yeah finally the guy

gave up I was like you know I push for core and I edit I set up a tripod once and he's like all right whatever and then I finally dozed off landed back in New York and that's the hard part about New York is the ladies like you're here you haven't been you've been here six years we got to go on a date so we went on a date and you know the whole thing suck good but fun times good to be back good to see you fatty good to be good to have you back it's all exciting this is an exciting time it's gonna be a good summer yes a lot cooking and it's just quite a thrill and where we're just excited that you're here for the ride

on Tuesdays with stories big Chuck on the ones and twos we love you Chuck D and also we got the patreon is kicking it up a notch I know we said that before but what I really mean it this time yeah Chuck is really doing thing yeah we got ideas we got pitches we got nothing but ideas yeah we got Kevin Smith is coming on I think yeah it's gonna be fun Mike for Big Lea is apparently a part of it now and yeah it's a really it's a hot time to get on that patreon and the episodes are cooking I notice YouTube views are going up subscriptions are going up so disdain for us in this office is going up yes yeah subscribe to

the YouTube get on the YouTube like share comments send it off get on the patreon this is the time you're in the patreon we're getting going deep by the way we didn't ask me anything or whatever that was heavy that got heavy then we had a whole thing we talked about our parents we really got in there on there let's let's say we're doing the YouTube free every week as soon as the episode comes out so as soon as you know Tuesday as soon as it comes out it'll be free on the YouTube but then you get ad-free on the patreon patreon ad-free if you don't want to you know subscribe to the patreon and you get the ad-free

audio and the ad-free video hey nothing wrong with that how about that love it love that mel Allen so that's exciting get on the patreon if you're if you're a big Tuesday get on the page get on there for three bucks yeah best deal in town prefer if you did five or six it's gonna be bad and I want to plug the special over half a million views at the time recording this hopefully the time you're hearing this it's 700 or whatever thanks to everyone who's watched shared like if you're listening and you haven't watched it get on it I'm predicting a million in three weeks I'm hoping for a million got to keep it going algorithm whatever it's

called this year's material it's for free on YouTube go over there subscribe a lot of you are not subscribed please do more exciting stuff coming what date you got there fatty I got some dates you got a show in London I'll show 21 so ho on May 19th oh wow figure out what day we can record out there be nice I think Fanny's working on a studio of some kind a few people have emailed so we'll be in London we got to figure out our overlap just send me your flights for God's Sakes anyway then gay Tacoma comedy club one night only Memorial Day night I don't people probably doing should a memorial it's May 30th in Tacoma come on

out one night only then it gets crazy in June San Francisco punchline June 9th through the 11th Vancouver Rickshaw Theater June 12th Magoobies in Baltimore June 16th through 18 Atlanta punchline first time work in Atlanta other than open to Apollo and Louie that's June 24 and 25 we got big movie news coming soon that movie out there oh boy soon Toronto July 29 and then August is crazy Des Moines funny bone Nashville Zany's Liberty funny bone it's gonna be a crazy crazy summer Royal Oak I'm coming back at the end of September yeah and then October Columbus funny bone Albany funny bone wild year

Omaha funny bone Hartford funny bone all the funny bones love it yes funny bone wait when does this come out comes out on May 17th great this weekend I'm in Bricktown comedy club in Oklahoma City I actually promised two people they could host so I got to figure that out that I'm in London with the fat man Huntsville Alabama Magoobies in Baltimore the Vic in Chicago I'm doing some Burke Chrysler Park dates Irvine improv back in LA come on by Houston improv that's a big room Lord knows we need you comedy off Broadway Alex in Kentucky San Antonio Tejas Palm Beach improv I'm doing a weird gig in Portland Maine I've

never been there I'm excited oh I love Portland Maine one of the great cities Richmond funny bone yeah pump Brea improv back in LA Orlando improv all kinds of fun dates Mark Norman comedy dot com check out the specials check out the Netflix's check out the patreon get a mug get a shirt get a life and thanks for coming we love you praise Allah