Tuesdays with Stories! - #497 St. Fatty's Day

Episode Date: April 4, 2023

The boys are in the core of the big apple, folks! Mark is back from taping his Netflix special in Chicago, and he's telling the tales everybody. Was it a smart choice to tape his special on St. Patrick's Day? Joe is back from the Comedy Dojo, and he came back to NY for a world-class hang with his #3 best bud Henry Phillips. He heads to a rock show and gets a hookup from a Tuesgay to meet the band - but does it go south?! Questions are answered on this week's Tuesdays! And check out the comic we talk about on the show, Keegan Tindall @keegantindall! Our Stuff: - patreon.com/tuesdays - youtube.com/tuesdayswithstories Sponsors: - Shop better hydration & support the show athttps://www.liquidiv.com promo code TUESDAYS for 20% off. - Support the show & take 15% off your Raycon order athttps://www.buyraycon.com/TUESDAYS - Support the show and get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the codeTUESGAYS at https://www.SheathUnderwear.com

hey mark fake banter for the intro that's all I know how to do great good to be here welcome to Tuesdays with stories hit her in the face with a surfboard and then the duck fell out of his bag surfs up and she didn't even flush knock knock who's there mark Norman and Joe list yeah it's Tuesdays with stories everybody that's terrible this is supposed to be chasing my baby mecca like a high mecca Heidi ho you know that's from Pewee Herman whoa my right out of the playhouse baby yeah Pewee's playhouse yeah he's fun weird I know the guy jerked off in a porn theater which

doesn't sound so bad to me sounds pretty normal but that was a weird show how did that show get sold in the room I don't know it's a good point cuz it was like adult and kid it was real wacky it was cookie they're sitting on a throne and that the guy starts talking so you can eat your ass and then the fish tank lights up and it's gay I mean there was it was all there was a genie in there the blender was racist yeah it was wacky I don't remember it that well I remember watching it with Uncle Dale and stuff but I think it was one of those ones where everyone loved it and I pretended as a kid I was like six and I'd be like oh yeah

Pewee yeah but really I was like I like Heathcliff hey it was fun and Garfield Heathcliff Heathcliff no one cares something like that yeah was that right I think that's what your dad said to you yeah he doesn't say much well what about the movie though Pewee's big event well that was terrifying because it was big birth though and the clowns that was the scariest thing that's like a band big birth in the clowns that was the scariest thing I had ever seen at that point yeah bus driver and I was afraid to take the bus and I had to sit in the back of the bus because I was gay it was just terrifying Rosa Parks by the way I

saw a comedian amazing comedian had a joke about Rosa Park that's what sprung it do you know this guy's a burn victim Keegan burn victim yeah it's really something it's a sight to behold Chris burns no good guys wait a minute it's Keegan till till he's like a marine I think he's an ex-mariner he's all he's all jacked up he's a little I think he's that guy he's a handsome kid oh not a marine well there's a guy on bumping mics who is a he was a burn oh no this guy's never bumped any Mike's I think he's done like seven sets but he's damn funny really and he's like adorable and he's his arms burned or whatever he's

scar yeah he's all fucked up as the face burned it's like I think the slight face but he's still very handsome he's a good adorable guy and beautiful hair and chatted with him he's got no vision problems so best thing that ever happened to him what do we talk house fire well it's not my story to be told okay I'll tell the story drunk driver drunk drivers in jail the whole night it's like it's quite a story and then like the plane caught on fire other the car car he's driving he's got a nice dame blowing them and then I got you know a crazy kook a real Vince Neil comes up behind and fucking plows him burning man car

explodes and end of story man it's an origin story look at that's Leno eat your heart out but he did a set and I was like on the floor this guy he's killer he's got some killer bits he's got some great burn bits he's got some great non burn wow that was fire I said how long you've been doing comedy he said fucking three weeks what this kid's gonna be huge where'd you see him at the hospital is at the dojo the dojo the burns are all out I mean this was a good six hours ago well I gotta meet mr. Burns he's really something else holy I'm telling you he's gonna be big you heard it here for this is the first place you

heard it there you go this kid's gonna be massive I don't know his name it'll need the name just give it a goog on burn victim dojo Bernie Sanders Keegan Keegan tea oh Keegan tea tea bone T bone steak there you go well done flame broiled oh that's a good but anyways he had a bit about Rosa Parks but where the hell were we how well how great is that dojo by the way oh forget about the dojo it was great Danny Braff set it up it was a it was a real cook and he's a funny guy all right I don't know his stuff that well oh he's very funny he's a good guy and it was a great hang it was a couple of his magician buddies

Danny Braff used to be a magician that explains it how about that but I was hanging with these magicians and there were a couple cooks they were like the twins from the shining sitting there with dresses on oh red rum quietly sitting there yeah and then after a while you go hey what's going on there quiet face yeah yeah and they go out with that friend Danny's friends and with the magicians now you may not know this about me but I'm a big magic douche really a magic glee I love them and look at this whoa that's a good time for the folks at home I just pulled my dick off yes small dick with a nail on it good Russian

name small dick Boris Dickoff oh hey I like that that's pretty good count it but anyways those kids were sitting there they start doing some magic and show me a couple things and that was exciting I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about all right well yeah I'm saying the dojo's killer dojo was great yes thanks to all the gays that came out I mean we we filled it right up I mean only seats 11 people sure yeah but come out to the duds in Jersey Morris Morris Plains yeah Morris I said Morris town once on stage it was like I said the n-word that's what you've owned it she won't really yeah yeah but it's town there's planes there's

burns a lot of towns a lot of Morris's but Tommy Morrison it was an automobiles it was great great time yeah BRAF burn kid and Chavone came ripped just a hot crowd and I had like leftover t-shirts from like miscellaneous and so I'll bring the shirts are you thinking and then you got like seven shirts it's like two double XL one small and so they get you don't love this feeling a kid comes out he looked a little autistic and he goes give me four lay them on me whoa I go well they're all triple XL the kid was four nine seventy eight pounds yeah you know prenatal problem yes yes NATO is Russia right Russia's out of NATO oh

that's out of NATO okay then the premature prenatal sure preemie preemie yeah something I tried to connect those okay okay preemie to birth defects but anyways he was like give me four and it was sweet I sold like 80% of my shirts in one swoop there you go and that's just hard clean cash baby take that to the bank oh I took it to the bank baby but yeah great time so thanks to Danny Braff all people that came out a lot of sweet fans Chavone ripped like I said Danny Braff oh and there was a great guy from Austin it was very funny oh boy that sounds like the dojo's popping yeah Matt something you know his name EMC

and he was very funny I said you know I hadn't done in a while I was just sat and watched the show I stood but I stood and watched the show that's nice I'm so I got no comedy I got I'm a the tank is empty you know I did the special and I am wiped out I did that thing where I'm like I got about 10 more minutes after the special and I got so keyed up during the shoot that I did a ball because I had a hot crowd I was like the cameras are rolling fucking I'll get it and I blew them all well you don't have to put it in there that's true but they worked right so then you're like oh I'm getting laugh the more laughs the better but who

knows maybe I'll shave five minutes off or something I do the opposite I'm like ooh I could do that bit I'm like I better not yeah the seedling I know I love a seedling but I can edit but yeah now they're there they're baked in though and it comes though it all comes around well that's the thing is I got no ideas Jerry I have you know I can write a bit I got a couple one-liners but I need the ideas to work on that's the part no one tell they go you got a right you got a right it's like I got nothing to write I say this all the time well this happens with our companion Sam Arill one of the great joke writers in history but sure he's

one of these guys he's like let's bounce and I'll be like I got nothing he's like well we'll bounce and I'm like nothing to all about you exactly you can't just do this right that's nothing yes yes so then he'll call and give you a bit and he goes all right what do you got and I'm like I tried to warn you but I got nothing I know and then you try to go well some tables around summer square and he goes what is this I go I told you I nothing you know you get desperate I'll be like this yeah you ever see you know raging bull but you're sleepy so it looks like raging full he's like I don't think there's anything I'm like I don't either

I just trying to get your phone exactly I'm dying here you ever see a kid with a burn unit but he's not all the way burned he's hey he's half baked is that anything got you handsome guy yeah well he's got a story now that's what you need in this business not about the funny you said he's funny but you got a burn story you're off to the barbecue well that's the thing you got a story and funny forget about it oh I got some pits cooking that's interesting I wouldn't think of you as a guy with a sweaty armpit well you know what it is we got that whack-a-doo weather out there it's 64 degrees outside but it's

12 when you wake up so I'm all over the road yeah and it's quite toasty in here and then I don't want to go back home later so I put on a layer and then you're you're struggling through this the hot part yeah I got the same thing I'm now this is a tweener yes a tweener recording at 3 and we'll be done at 4 5 and then you're like I got a spot at 840 and I already worked out I guess I'll go home I might be I'll hit your pole if you want but if you're going home you're going home yeah all right how about that beating on the subway I sent you the article this is for all the people all these guys oh list is crazy he's

paranoid 8 15 Saturday night 14th Street station train my train a guy just punches it another guy in the face knocks his tooth loose drags him out of the platform kicks the shit out of him the MTA employees just watch with their thumbs up the rest you got that right random Friday night 8 p.m. not 1 a.m. not 2 a.m. yep and he said he's suing the MTA because he's like they could have done more yes so it's the city's in Hock there's a bunch of viral videos going around I got to stop following fight Haven on Twitter it's a great account but it's just like no these poor kids there's kids fighting their teachers in

middle school and they're all jacked up and big and scary and muscular and the teacher's like some nerd you know some some quiff with glasses like don't hurt me there LeBron it's brutal yeah it's I mean I follow hockey fights which I love but every once in a while they'll mix in like a fight in the stands and it's like a guy and you know in a wings jersey being like hey fuck you and then he gets like punchy like you have this thing like yes yes the Rick or Mortis not good news and I'm like I'm scrolling I'm like oh I just want to throw up and kill myself and kiss my father on the lips before he dies I know and hear this I'm

watching this I miss one step but I'm like my knee imagine just going out clean no protection no nothing and they hit their head on a seat on a step on a tip who knows what and you land on a dick now you're your anal virginity is gone but it's it's just that easy no other guys wife is watching don't get me wrong I assumed that guy moments before was calling everyone the n-word and throwing dog shit in someone's face but still yeah he's just laying there like oh the head stomps is what I can't take or the soccer kick to the face that's too much I can't watch any of that shit but the thing is now we're in this weird time and

now I'm getting all fruity and poopy here we go but we're in that with this weird time where it's like we're all the way over here like the safe space we're all don't trigger me don't threaten me and then it's all the way over here with knocked out at the hockey game going full stiff arm and going out and there's not much in the middle no it's either hey if you say Jew you're going to hell in a handbasket and you lose your job at Amazon or you're gonna get your your dick ripped off at a Cougars game it's all over the place I made up a team he'll rip your dick off and throw in the tallgrass I just rewatched an old one

of his I mean that that he's got the whole thing the first special with the aides yeah monkey pussy next night great rip your dick off throw it in the tallgrass the Native American I'm an alcoholic I just rewatched the one from Texas which is not that long ago it was kind of before it started getting hairy with him and he had the whole thing about he's some kid some of his his no Middle Eastern kid at a backpack on he's like they're gonna take that shit at the airport that robots gonna come out and blow your shit up and we're dying I'm dying and it's just so silly now he's the best and kill him softly is

the best I used to think bring the pain was the best but I actually think kill him softly holds up better you think I do think I'm way faster really yeah there's more big laughs I disagree I think Chris rock comes out with that three-on-three with a half I am scared a young white boy calm that's bigger black is a lot faster than bring that's my favorite yeah yeah big piece of chicken robot tussin yeah huge yeah layaway but I wonder though because that was in our price it's like SNL you know that was our primo or any other art really I don't know you put those two next to each other a bigger blacker

versus now there's no question I'm talking objectively well I'm saying the the comedy is better yeah I'm saying would we think that's as great like if I show that to my nephew is he watching bring the pain well first of all if you watch this bring the pain he's gonna be like who the hell is O.J. Simpson I never heard of this character I just made up the bus driving murder yes I don't know what this is well he is on Twitter who is OJ OJ right he's around he's still in the public eye but but even Monica Lewinsky this generation what is this that's a jizz on the shirt which is a funny thing to learn because we live

that in real time it's weird to be like in the history books and like and then the president had a fat lady stick a cigar up as our pussy and spoke it oh whatever she came on if you came on a dress yeah what is this right like that's gotta be in the book oh history book yeah yeah yeah the chappelle joke right yeah it is cooking then you start thinking okay I was born in 83 I'm old but that was just 20 years before 63 and right now it's 20 years before 2003 2003 which I was eight years into comedy at that point it's all of my brain is melting it's too much no it's weird yeah 62 was 20 years before we were born but

right now we're 40 years after we were born that's fucking yeah so the equivalent of the other direction is 42 yeah it's 40 years in the other direction is 42 not 62 yeah it's like you're almost 40 so 40 years before you're born is like 1943 yeah it's fucking World War two yeah because you think of all that like oh that's not real that should never happen but it happened baby yeah yeah it's very strange very strange very strange and then just to keep going with the tropes I sit there and I go man the 90s were great those were good times but that's what they said the 40s but the 90s no they were like the war is gonna

kill all of us everyone was coming home missing legs well they caught the greatest generation and all this shit well the generation was great that doesn't mean they were like this is fun yeah I think this is the country came together they were putting gasoline in a can and sending it off the wives with the grease yeah that was exciting but I think the 90s is peak America it's like the economy is booming the film and music was off the charts or on the charts whatever yes charts yeah pre-911 is supposed to be like things were good like people growing up in that time had very little worry but you could nitpick

all day you got the Rodney King in 92 the riots then you got OJ winning when he shouldn't have won and then you got I think a shuttle blew up you got the Iraq war you got Bush well the shuttle was 86 90s Iraq war was like 80 days long and even like the riots I mean that sucked for Rodney and everyone went crazy but for the most part most people were like oh that's crazy yeah but even Monica Lewin ski yeah I did it last week but even she got fucked on that no pun intended but she had she got called a whore and all this it's like well Bill was the dick yes but she got called a whore run out of town yeah I mean it sucks for

people everybody had a great obviously Monica Lewinsky had a better time of it in the 40s when she was born yeah so she had a hard time certainly but she did get to blow a president that's pretty cool I would like to blow Obama a lot killed a suck-off Biden yeah that'd be easy it'd be straight like a yeah it's drooping oh it's true with that Adderall dick too he's about an inch long oh yeah well but can't we all just get along yeah well where are you this is all over the road tape the special we're all over the place we're up the ass we're over the cunt yes so I went out to Chicago yes one of the great

cities great town I would say if what do you think is the best comedy town in America Denver you mean outside of New York yeah yeah I think New York's out really well I think the audiences have gotten a little quiffy I think we got the best comics but I think the audiences have this is the first time in history I think New York is not the cutting-edge well it's just because I want to get in I want to hear all about this people are dying to hear but it's what you mean by comedy city I mean like we have the stand and the seller and New York comedy club and like we have killer clubs yes and you can still run

around doing sets so we going from an audience standpoint are we going from I'm going from an audience I'm going from a work trying to build material hmm and good crowds killer crowd like where do you go to shoot a special everybody goes to Denver I suppose so I mean I go to New York I guess you'd done three there now there is hot dog all the way yeah that's true okay well it's a thought I'm saying it outside of New York we'll go there where you were you sure you're saying for a comedian crowd yeah because I it's like I said it's confusing I'm like do you mean from an audience trying to see the best comedy do you mean

trying to build an act or shoot an hour well I feel like when I got started in New York the crowds were different and then I go on the road I would go on the road and be like oh this is weird yeah and I go back to New York and build more material then go back on the road and show it to them and they were like we like some of it we don't like some of it now I go on the road and build material then I come back to New York and they're like we don't like that right that's the first time I've ever seen it happen like that interesting Bill Burr even said he's like I can't do sets in New York I just bomb all day they don't they won't come

with me they won't give me a chance they hear certain words they check out yeah they're analyzing me instead of listening to the jokes there's a lot of analyzing it depends on the venue though that's true sometimes the stand if we're on it's our people it's too giving so they're great yeah but yeah sometimes the seller you get touristy but sometimes you get these like well I got Brooklyn forget about I won't even set foot in Brooklyn stop emailing me about your Brooklyn show there you go folks you're gonna hear the bad news but yeah I ain't coming to Brooklyn but yeah but anyways Denver rules Chicago I love

yeah I would put it too after Denver interesting so Denver number one well just as far as audience goes for shooting a special as far as comedy savvy as far as giving it up hmm Madison Madison's great but I think they have less venues and whatever yeah okay but wait we alive grass here's what I'm saying did Chicago for four o'clock flight wait wait oh to go to Chicago to get there the night before you know I don't get there too late okay so you got with you yeah that was everyone else is like what the fuck is wrong with this person four o'clock flight and I go when you got a four o'clock flight you got

the whole day you have the whole day I have till 11 a.m. and then I had over there just to be safe all right well I like to fly by the seat of my cunt and it's a five o'clock flight sorry five o'clock flight so I went to the house in Brooklyn I checked that out there's an oil pipe broke and that's got to be fixed we had to get the city out there it's eight guys and vests and hard hats going gonna have to dig all this up we're gonna have to excavate we're gonna have to shut you down we're gonna have to kill your dad we're gonna have to call it the president and do a bomb threat I'm like god damn it's always something so

I go okay how's that gonna work he goes well we're gonna have to come back in here at 7 a.m. tomorrow beep beep beep get about 18 trucks in here we're gonna do scaffolding we're gonna do a nuclear test where we do at the pH balance whole thing it was like all right and they go but we're gonna have to break up this the sidewalk and I go all right who fixes that I go you fix that what okay great so that's how that goes what are you mayor coach I'm coach yes so I'm like god damn there's always something with his house I'm never buying a fixer upper again it's a money pit hmm great film yes Shelley long maybe I believe it's long yeah there's

all those shellies Duvall long winters about a Shelley Shelley long hey all right well this story is too long but so that that sucked then I hightail it back to Manhattan and I eat lunch with the lady I do a push-up and then before you know you're like well it's three I gotta be to the airport by five let me go to the airport I'll be nice and early right in the hot on hollentunnel traffic missed my flight oh first time I got precheck to I was all excited I had a tuxedo on I had bells on Richard Belzer and I'm like here we go precheck I'm keeping these shoes on motherfucker I'm not taking the laptop out I brought the laptop just to

not take it out and I didn't make it there oh so that's why you have a manager hey my wife had a heart attack I missed the flight you know some lie and so he goes I got you on the 830 so now I'm sitting at the airport till you know three hours in the lounge thank God for the lounge I must eat in 38 bowls of tortilla soup and then I get over there lost a first-class flight to that's special and that I lost it that's the worst yeah that is the worst I got a flight I saw like city coming up I got the main cabin back of the flight I'm hoping to get that upgrade or else I'll have to shoot myself that's a long one

do you want to just hope for the Delta come yeah on my back I love Delta come oh yeah easy to swallow you got that right so good get back to 11d land in Chicago beautiful weather it's got that that flurry oh flurry I love a McFlurry you know it's just a little bit of snow those little cute little yeah whenever I see that flurry I always think of yourself yes yes very nice and boy I gotta tell you a shy town it's clean it's safe I didn't see one homeless guy again I'm in downtown magical mile or whatever the hell it's called yeah eight mile miracle mile what is it miracle or magical miracle magnificent magnificent

final answer yes by the way giant bean in their park yeah I know the bean shouldn't Boston have a bean yeah I guess so bean town flick the bean yes big beans yeah big beans and being there done that but go to bed a nice get you know nice midnight go to bed in my nice hotel next day boy oh boy all systems go Vita shows up will silvin shows up all the management shows up the lady shows up and Jason Katz Eric man Andrew Youngblood Matt Sally Salacuzzi we got a good group and we we head over to that Vic I love the Vic love the big now I'm on the way there I wrote three tags and two callbacks wow cuz you just in that

hour mode you know it's it consumes you sure so I wrote all and I'm like first show we got two Friday two Saturday first show Friday I'm gonna try these callback what if I get a callback and style old motherfucker up the four shows is excited cuz there's no pressure on any show exactly let's let's fourth the first three stink but well the day of the the Friday day we all go to lunch together and the whole town is buzzing with st. Patties the river is green St. Patties big Irish patio white devil blue-eyed car bomb it's a bunch of fucking O'Reilly's out there and the river's green and everybody's got the

dumb hats and these beads on and their dumb shirt that says finger me I'm gay or whatever it is and I can just tell like these first bless you these first right down figure me I'm gay these first shows are gonna be a little rowdy who the hell books a show on New Year or St. Patties yeah big fuck up big fuck up st. Patties day so we get there the crowd's hammered eight o'clock show and they are hooting and hollering Vita goes up they throw the book at him well I think he's a leprechaun he did one of these two that didn't help fight Nairish and so they threw the book at Willse Vince thank God he's there he's

like a black cop he's like hey shut up honky I'll kill you you know they like that yeah but we had a decent show but there there's the weird thing where they're insanely rowdy but also sleepy right so they're like you know it's like a Cosby victim but we got through it and it was one of the things where you have two solid sets like everything did well we got heckled a little bit and you're like I guess we got it we kind of got it already people are heckling the special yes yes heckle bad heckle you kept making all the stuff I'm Batman so it was weird but we had high hopes and I had to yell at my management too I already

told you but they were getting us into the venue at five for an eight o'clock show and I had to be like hey no bueno we're not doing that shit this is and there's a call sheet I hate a call sheet I know it's all so people can have jobs yes sheets and trucks and wires and grips and sounds yes it's like well I need three guys I know they got a makeup lady in the in the room with us and we're just like so my dad jizzed my ass and my mom's black and she got picked up by the NAACP and she's like I felt the same way there's like nine different times literally like I'm like I don't know that can't can eat my ass yeah so

sorry I have a loose hair right right I'm bending the wife over I'm like pounding her ass over the couch as a goof and she's like I gotta get what kind of show is this you know and then the worst is for at the VU there's no makeup so it's just the two of us like we're just back and you have different versions of yourself of course I would never show a woman I just met one-on-one I would never be like wouldn't you eat a kid's ass if you had to right birthday for a hundred bucks it probably tastes good with all the candy they eat she's just hearing that and then we have to go back and I'm like so yes I know I know it's

like you joke about saying crazy shit in bed then sitting there with Sarah after like so what's for dinner yes it's horrible yeah but anyways so that was that and she eventually by the second night she had to gotten her own room in another wing of the theater but it was all fine it was all fine I asked her to shave my pubes she didn't find that funny but you know hair and makeup good time nice lady do you tip her well I just paid mine you have a conglomerate thing maybe you're supposed to tip mine I was straight out of my pocket and it was hefty but you just gave her the money he didn't go on top of it no okay

it was like it was a lot less than 10 grand 10 grand grand oh wow that must be nice okay okay that's fair but I'm not she's not cutting my hair and putting on my eyelashes sure sure she's like doing the powder I mean Chuck could have done my makeup all right couple puffs next year do my makeup yeah a couple puffs and then a couple of these well when that burn unit kid gets a makeup he better he's gonna need a couple patches and maybe a skin graft but kick in Danny graph but hey folks Tuesdays with stories as always is brought to you by sheath that's right sheath underwear we love it do you find

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drinks and is gluten dairy and soy free grab your liquid IV in bulk nationwide a Costco or you can get 20% off when you go to liquid IV comm and use code Tuesdays at checkout that's 20% off anything you order when you shop but better hydration today using promo code Tuesdays at liquid IV comm enjoy either way we had a great time and then it's so hard for me I know you're out of the boat here but I didn't drink for five days so after the first two shows you're like we put the work in all the callbacks bombed and all the tags bomb but we put the work in we did two good shows I'd love to have a cocktail you know I'm in

Chicago I want to go up on a roof and look at the Sears Tower and the Michigan Lake and just jizz it up yeah what's out of the boat what's that you're out of this the drinking the drinking boat there the Amistad whatever you want to call it the the Titanic oh sure yeah the chair is breaking I gotta get up against the wall here use some support that's what she said but yeah so then we woke up bang the wife early I want to get the juices flowing gotta do it put her on top reverse cow works every time I love that you ever get reverse cow in front of a mirror so you can see those tits that's pretty good you got to kind of do this

I'll take it looks like a Norman Rockwell painting yeah but get on that one Rocky because that'd be a nice nice image passed away ah he was good you know here are a lot of Normans anymore yeah Norman Mailer Norman Donald who's the other Norman Norman Lear Norman Lear Norman Rockwell maybe I'll name my kid Norman Norman Normand hey Norman the beach is okay okay well so second night I just thought of something that's not that great yeah Norman that's like your wife Normand minus the D she doesn't have a dick because Norman without the D and then D I was thinking dick but then you got married so she's

like a Norman but she doesn't have a I see I see yeah yeah she has a dick but we could cut this all right got it got it out leave it in but so yeah second night was great you know it's weird the second night stupid you're all right Norman second night like to seven o'clock show night to and a 10 o'clock show and I got to tell you it was sober and it was a whole different world it was like the first time we ran with weights on and the second night crowd was sober sorry yeah I was sober and it was Saturday so they got a sleep in you know they're ready and it was a new crowd and I was like oh that was just that was work now

it's now it's money so we just killed it and we got it on the second night easily so tell me who else is in the grid cuz I saw some photo you got a whole hang in there you know he was selling posters for me he's a cook and so posters he he was like you want you should do a limited po he's a businessman this guy's an idea man right you should sell posters like I don't want to worry about that shit he's like I'll do it and I'm like I don't want you doing it you're a friend I don't want you and he's like I like doing stuff wow he's one of those types the doing stuff guys what a guy yeah some people don't want to sit there you know

you know when you have Thanksgiving and your aunts like you want me to cut this bird up you know you know that lady or who's doing the dishes I'll do the dishes and we're all sitting there watching football like yeah go go nuts the other type of the time I was working with DePaolo and I said why don't you sell your CDs this is insane you have all these CDs you're just sitting on money and he goes I don't want going out there I go I'll do it there you go and he got give me a 10% or whatever and he goes okay awesome and then I was standing out there with the CDs and I thought I'm helping out and then he came out he

goes what are you doing you gotta sell them and he goes CDs folks get your CD and he was like like the ladies in Vegas he was like oh I'm not doing that no no so it was a short-lived thing well you're like hey you're already out here selling them just keep doing it it's a good point ah I have a point yeah but but any which is so young blood was there and then the pizza guy was there professor pizza showed up on Saturday he's a Chicago staple and just everybody it's just that aroma is the in that the bowels of the Vic and all these really who's up with this short wop and I go hey wait till you taste this pie and man

everybody was raven so that was a hit here's an awkward thing my management yanked 14 posters what do I do there what's that mean well I was signing them all backstay I signed 200 posters they sold like hotcakes and I made a nice chunk of change but means like I want one and then and then I want one and then you know you got your agent your tour manager your boss your your your wife your ex your doctor your priest and they all took them yeah I don't like that I don't like that either so I set them a bill it's tough I mean that's out of my pocket because it's cash I mean that's the hard thing but they also what's one

poster you probably printed these for 11 cents I'm like yeah I did but I did it you go print one but also it's money you would be making that's what I'm saying yeah so it doesn't matter how much they cost you're well it matters how much you're losing the exact amundo so I think four maybe five maybe five you could have five but that's still a gift I'm giving you fives a lot and how much for the posters I was selling for 30 yeah that's a lot of cash 14 times 30 420 bucks hey that was pretty good I'm bad for a makeup artist yeah all right yeah so that's that's a that's a nice chunk of jizz there 20 yeah 420 come on

that's what I was gonna pay veeter so that's a joke Joe's makeup lady yeah so yeah it's almost a makeup lady yeah so I sent a little but then I wonder if this into the office going this chute just charging us for the posters after all we did I'm like well how about you print a post and I'll just take one then but I don't want your poster my devil's advocate oh boy well is this like one always on the side of the man is this one group taken 14 or is it like 14 individuals that don't even have to do with each other well it's agents managers and people like that so you probably like I sat with Joe's manager at the at the

view yeah yeah and it's like it's like if that guy took one and then someone else takes one that he doesn't even know he doesn't think of it as like oh this is one of 14 right one for him because he likes you and he's close to you and he's part of it exactly people go it's one poster you're like yeah one poster for 14 of you I know that's the thing I don't know though yeah yeah well they knew I mean they were doing in front of there yeah yeah so that was that's tough that's tough it's a tough it's a very curvy situation yes they're like we want a poster we want to we want to hang it up but I'm like I know but someone has to

pay for this yeah it's a good point I think they'll throw me a couple but but I had to do the awkward thing like great weekend guys by the way here's a little invoice you come guzzlin Nazi yeah it is awkward it's awkward like this like with CDs I used to always the CDs when you first got a CD back in the day that sent you like 10 boxes yes you have I still have them I like use them as coasters I've thrown them at fucking bad cab drivers and stuff like frisbees but then like if comics were like can I get a CD I would never take money from a comic right t-shirts yeah now it's like they cost more money they cost eight bucks

to make and you sell them for 20 it's like it's not that much markup so if you lose a couple that's actually quite a bit so you kind of have to yeah I need that money also ship them in the whole thing yeah not to get a two per snickety but aren't you there working for me and don't I pay you 10% yeah is that is that cunty well I think they're like they know what you're making so they're like aren't you making fucking you know that's what I'm worried about you're like seven figures here and when you're where you're taking away eight bucks yeah you're like give me 30 bucks and they know you know what's really going on that's the

problem but again someone had to print these queefs and ship them and I signed them and we could make it at the box office with these fans out he's gays right so it's an interesting sitch they probably brought a gift for you too I bet they brought like a whiskey or a plaque or something like that yeah I'd gladly trade a whiskey for a poster so they're probably going hey we brought this guy whiskey and scooby-boop well when they get a special I'll bring them whiskey all right and they're my they did get a special our team like we got a special it's who's on the team that's my yeah team let's

chip in on these posters together okay well it's an interesting it's so funny when you when you have a podcast you're like I'll talk about the special the posters the bulk of it I had no idea this would be the meat of it the post is well Chuck is fuming over there I can see steam coming out of his he wants a free poster he's like well you know maybe they got there at 5 p.m. they set up the cameras they might have done that you know what I'm thinking though what a real difference though is a lot of the cameras situations like this it's like the person who's the talent wouldn't even be in charge of that whatsoever I

think they knew that too which is a little off-putting oh they knew that you were in charge of it no no I think they knew like he's he's wrapped up in the special so he won't notice a couple of sticky fingers yeah interesting yeah so it's it's a conversation piece we'll say that yeah but so you feel good about it it's up the ass and you feel like I got this motherfucker I totally got we got on that last one it was like the Louis special we open for you know it's like they were all okay yeah we got something there and then that last one was just like you know when you're like you're kind of doing okay every joke got a laugh but it

was never like raucous you're like maybe I'm okay I'm not that good and then when you get that good one you're like I'm good fuck all of you I got it of course and you have the thing where it's just these are LA come guzzlers so they're all like that was great you're great they were saying that all weekend we love you you're so funny but and then when you get a good one they're like that was it we were lying kind of right and so it's good to get that honest moment of like those suck that was the one see you tomorrow yeah it's tough it's it's always weird these specials is everyone trying to say the right thing and so many people

don't know the right thing to say it's it's very it's a tricky night it's a weird night it's a weird night it is because they feel I think a little handicap and useless because it's just me going up cameras pointing and shooting and telling the jokes and that's kind of it I think they want to get the call sheets and the cars and the schedules and the makeup lady and all that and here's the other big one I got this about 800 times hey so how you feeling I remember you talking about this before yes yes with you which I tried to explain before it's just people trying to help I know but how does it help it

doesn't they're the concern for you I don't think they are because here's the thing you go how you feeling not good oh really so what what now I don't know right just got to deal with it so why'd you bring it up you know and I know to me it's just for them it's for them not for me well you gotta do you got to say something you got to say something but how about give them hell go nuts but what would be good what would they say what could they say for the next one and we're all excited kill it okay break a leg how about break a leg that ain't that ain't broke suck their dicks that's what they're dicks which I got from you

which I love thank you yes suck their dicks is his lunch I know I remembered this because I think I wrote like how are you doing today because I remember last time you read about the how you feeling but I think in general they're thinking about you I get it I get it and I'm not mad at them I'm not like you piece of shit for us we how you how you feeling it's just a pointless gesture and I think it's more for them than me because I think you're right they got to say something I think the point is we're letting you know we're thinking about you I guess but then go we're thinking about you well that's not bad okay it's just a

pet peeve it's a personal thing and I warned them a month ago and they still didn't you warned them oh yeah cuz I know I'm weird so I'm going hey this is my weird thing please avoid it and you know I don't think you're weird I think every performer is like that I think every performer doesn't want that I don't think how you feeling right before an hour before you're going I don't get the upside of it how you feel I'm very nervous I think it's just like what people say I think that's all that's what it is that's what it is like a how are you doing sure yeah exactly it's the nights about you so how you feeling you

know I get it I totally get it I know I'm the minority here minority report we say your majority I think your majority performer but non-performers don't know right right and if you don't know now you know like that's one of the reasons that we're doing that alternative project for your special taping yeah we did last year and I didn't go do that to you which is why we didn't talk during it because I didn't want to put you in that position well I like a regular we're all hanging out exactly that's what you around boobly boo which what we talked about is like I'd rather be loose and fun and it's a hang yeah

it's like oh shit it's my turn to go on just like any other night totally distraction until it's time yeah the best like we talk about it's like what if you're at the funny bone in Omaha nobody's like how are you feeling yeah exactly they're just like yeah yeah that's going on and then you're Lucy goosey righty roosey yes but that was the best thing I did was have all those people in the green room because we had two big rooms my gang of knuckleheads and goofballs and then the suits and if they weren't there I'd have to just sit there with the suits or sit alone yeah I don't want any suits but that's what I

was saying is like some people are like doing push-ups and writing like this is the night and they're staring in the mirror and stuff and and that works for some people but for me I want to be loose when we lose yeah yeah totally felt the same way and watching will go up then Vita go up was really helpful so thanks to those guys thanks to everybody we got it in the can and there will be some wild backlash but I guess I'll deal with that when it comes wild you think why I think pretty wild I mean I go hard on the the tards a lot of black stuff I got some trans stuff abortion I got some men and women and gay I mean it it's

called soup to nuts I don't know if that's out that's the name of the special soup to nuts because I cover everything soup to nuts we go from birth to death oh wow yeah that's exciting I'm excited backlash is fun I guess tell that to the slaves but I mean it's a school shooting it's immigration by going to left and right all that bullshit fun good yeah that's what you're supposed to do I thought I thought we're supposed to dig right in there but it's all pipes there's a lot of jokes and it's all joke everything has a joke everything has a laugh so I'm not trying to get up on my

soap jizz but lashes good because it's it gets everyone going no fuck you and then it gets the algo I guess I guess like I gotta see this right right well hey Will Smith good job got a ton of press but yeah so we'll see what happens I can't wait what is it August you got a date or is that early August they're saying but Jason Katz said I got the file today I'm already dive it in now what does this mean he sent me two things for my last two specials like hard drive I thought it was gonna be like a file was orange things it's a big giant thing I don't even know what it is I think it's a hard drive it's a box but I thought a

hard drive was like I got hard drives that are like this well it's bigger ones a little bit like the size of my orange bumpers around it that could be like bumped and it won't break it's a bomb like what am I supposed to do with this fucking thing yeah that's a bomb that's why he's an editor I'm like anything I would do with this I would need him I'm just gonna mail it back to you like the dailies is basically the raw footage is that what it is it's the last one too if you want to keep it if you want to keep it for something from the future like a lady just emailed me about all footage of you guys that you must have

talked to and she's like do you have all the raw footage from hockey sets to use in this documentary oh Wendy Wendy she's a cook well I was gonna say it's something like that she's been working on that for since the 80s but let me ask you this with Katz directing or excuse me editing keep in mind we're on camera okay I'm just saying yeah Katz are you going cut this out cut that out maybe I'll start with this one instead of that one did you do and all that or this is where I'm in the minority and I think we've talked about this before my last two specials I didn't watch a second of wow I'm the complete reverse of Ari and

Rana and who are like going all day all night yeah and I'm German whatever but anyways I'm like I go by the show I'm like that show is great use mostly this show that joke I fucked up yeah off the memory of the show and say and put that together okay and then just trusting they put it together I should be a little more hands-on maybe I should walk maybe this time I'll watch do you watch a final yeah you gotta watch a final I didn't even do that I mean I don't want to watch your show either but no I don't want to watch my full hour either but you know I'll do it just because I have to because I don't know what the hell Katz

he put in there yeah it's weird but well we'll see this one I fucked around a bunch and there's some you know off the cuff some weird shit so I gotta decide which to leave in what to leave out your secret lyric well so we'll see alright I can't wait to see it you got a date I don't have a date I gotta figure out I gotta do a while before yours or a while after yours can't be like you know well watch it comes out Saturday yeah but there's Malaney's got one coming out and somebody else and the other guy so they're there they're popping well now there's just everybody's got a special yeah you gotta like you gotta pick who

you want to avoid mm-hmm but gonna do a little series leading up to it I can't world series interesting poker that's gonna be fun so I don't know I gotta I mine is just a matter of when I have enough to go on stage with right yeah that's what I'm worried about I'm back to square zero I'm I got nothing here but dojo I did a bunch of new and it was really fun and I was like oh maybe I got some shit there we go you should talk about you almost didn't do the the Netflix half hour that's right and then your choice was like well if I get in with them now maybe I'll do an hour that was the plan so that's interesting that

it worked out perfectly it worked out it was a gamble and everybody except you maybe and two other people I think Nate was like don't do the half hour you're above it fuck these people these are all douches and Jews fuck them and they didn't say that no no Nate was with your camp he was like no do it okay no no Nate would never speak that way we go but everybody else was like don't do it fuck the half hour you're above it and I was like well maybe I'll get my foot in the door that's an old myth that's how they make you feel and then they take it away from you and it worked wow so go with the gut I remember talking about

that yeah health there you go gut-filled haha there we go but yeah so guts on Nickelodeon all right well I'm excited to see and I gotta I gotta I gotta tell you about an epic please please this is the problem with doing a comedy special in Chicago you miss out on a real New York hang I love it yeah I mean we were we could have used you oh what are we talking seller at the the schoolhouse up there schoolhouse what is that oh yes one or not there you go no this is one of our all tell I don't want to speak for the team but my all-time favorite buddies one of the great great hangs maybe come on maybe my number one

hang buddy ouchie besides you these number three behind you and Chuck all right you guys are one in one a but this guy is just you're never gonna have a problem got stories for days story after story after story joke after joke laid back cool as they come how could this be one of the great comics and just the hang and I treasure every minute I got with them little talk about a little place called Aspen Mr. Henry Phillips what a what a hang yeah Phil and we go house way back and he's an LA staple oh yeah he's always a good time he has a couple of cold ones and a guitar and he's got some stories leather jacket and

a big handsome face let's not go crazy that's nice some rugged masculinity my hands nice Shane handsome that's a good point I have a point but she can suck you off you got that right best gift ever so old Henry's he's coming back hey that's a good movie old Henry by the way I like that film but anyways he's coming to town and I only get to see when I go to LA we go way way back oh yeah one of the truly great hangs and so he's coming to town he said hey I'm visiting my cousin I'm gonna come into New York and I said hey why don't you stay with us we got the furnished apartment downstairs and some people come to town you say

hey you can stay and then as soon as you hang up the phone you go oh I know it we got fucking asshole fucking Pete shit dick ass head coming and Sarah's like what are you doing your piece of shit why'd you invite him like I don't know I felt bad and now you're whispering upstairs like it's brutal so but this one you're like guess what great news we got Henry coming to town so I cut it say come stay with us and you're just excited and he's one of these guys you start writing down your story like I heard this joke what's a good joke I heard lately I got this bit and gotta be ready he's cuz he's got tails oh yeah

we got set list we're both carrying set list to a hang he's ASAP so he comes in and takes the train of course he's one of these guys classic I'm lazy he has a hard time navigating New York he's an LA guy you drive everywhere so I'm like it's easy follow Google Maps and train whatever and he goes I get this text up I'm on the express I don't know what happened he goes all the way to the story so I'm laughing because I'm like it's perfect of course this happens yep yep we meet at the diner and it's just perfect he's got the guitar you got the diner you order the soup and the grilled cheese and it's story for story and

then Sarah was doing stavrosis pods so she's walking home I say hey meet us at Michael's Ron on says what are you up to I say I got Henry Phillips over here pull up a chair do they know it Phil well Henry's Henry and Sarah dated in 1988 so they go away they've been knowing each other since like 9 11 oh wow the old sloppy tower so and then Ron on he met him once 70 years ago or whatever but Henry doesn't remember him nobody does yeah it's tough to remember him yeah hard to forget tough to remember that's a country lyric if I ever heard one so run on sitting there we got the four-person diner hag now I got Ari

text he goes hey do you want a podcast and I go I got good news not only I want a podcast I got the best co-guest ever I got Henry Phillips in town oh my god he's mother goose and you know Ari he's a ball buster because I'd rather have my sister's and after that I have to get serious tell you hate those moments yeah I'm like this you're just kidding right like you understand Henry's like number one yeah yeah I get it you love Henry and all right well maybe he's not a fan so no he's a fan okay so but they don't know each other too well because they're in LA running in different circles

Henry's improv Ari's store they're like different different factions and you know Ari on the surface he's a piece of shit racist he's making fun of the fat lady ugly the Kobe yeah oh yeah yeah yeah which by the way I get emails every day people you gotta stop hanging out with this guy is that right person yeah oh geez well in our defense he snuck on to the live show yeah we didn't invite him I didn't invite that kook he just I mean I did text and say come by but I didn't say get on the show I say guys they blame you for everything anyways so I told the bouncer this guy shows up don't let him in it was just one of those

ugly cats yeah just mr. Ed yeah so anyways so we're gonna go meet up we're late for the podcast because we can't stop hanging so I go we got to get to the show and Henry's like I don't really know Ari Ari's like I don't really know Henry it's gonna be great you guys have made for each other so we go all the way down to Alphabet City we do the podcast on YouTube right now it's just me Henry and Ari story story story story strip club stories rock and roll stories and we're all going to white Reaper that night I love white Reaper then I get an email this is like one of my new favorite bands I can email from like

their record label who's a Tuesday by the way my taping whoa he emails and say hey you want to meet the band I'll put you in touch with their manager so now we're going to meet the band now I'm driving the bus holy shit and Henry such a great hang he goes I got nothing on Friday I go you want to go see this rock band he goes yeah I'll do anything I don't care so I got him coming he's like I don't know anything about this band I say you're gonna love him Ari goes oh you want to see them where at I said Irving Plaza he goes I'm at the stand I'll just come to the show it's around the corner from each other gonna get a tick I bought

him a tick I bought Henry a tick Ari got his own to defend for himself well what are we talking that's under bucks okay okay that's a spot-pay exactly so it's and then Matt Wayne of course is going he introduced me to the band so Matt Matt's bringing his day it's Matt Christina me Sarah Ari Henry what a guy what a gang so we do the pod we're on the rooftop looking at the Empire State Building the World Trade Center great podcast we all walk over Henry's like I got to get some New York slices you forget when you have a non-New Yorker in town you got that right fatty so we're shoving slices up our ass we meet up

with Sarah we meet up with Wayne Ari goes to his spot he comes and meets us over we watch White Reaper they fucking rip they kick ass get in on this band they got four records they are awesome don't fear the Reaper then act afterwards it gets awkward so this is where it gets weird so now I'm telling everybody we're gonna go I feel like a big shot like we're gonna go meet the band oh boy it's also funny because we're 78 years old and they're like 21 oh are they yeah they're like they're like young boys and any one of them can fuck my wife anytime I'd love to watch well Henry already did so so I go I think they were it's

celibate I see probably that makes sense but anyway so I musical comedian no that's gross yeah so anyways I go we meet we're meeting the band and so I should just sit on it and be like hey you guys want to go see the band but you know me I'm like we want to meet the band I'm gonna meet the band I know the band I know the manager it's all great it's gravy it's gonna be exciting and that thing you do I'm like they're fans of mine I'm sitting pretty I'm like if I know I'm like I think I do we'll get to sing a song with them so the whole show we're listening and they're like so how do we meet the band I'm like I'm gonna

text the manager don't worry as soon as the show is over we enjoy the show the show is killer so right as soon as the show ends I text the manager and I go hey listen I got oh god oh geez Christ don't look shouldn't have looked use that go airplane mode I forgot yeah it's a dick pic from Sarah so I text the cop the band manager and I go hey we're just in the back over here and of course you've been to shows as soon as the show ends they got all the scary guys go get the fuck out here you can't stay home you can't they're literally like mopping up oh boy and we're just in the corner with the oldest people there

Henry's 71 Ari's 83 Sarah's 58 and we're just sitting there now do you want to go let me go see him I'll talk to him are you bringing the whole gaggle I'm feeling that way but right away I'm like this is gonna go bad it's so embarrassing that we're gonna get kicked out and literally everyone's filed out and it's just us in the corner and for like the third time the guy's like you have to leave oh boy and I'm doing this but I have no confidence I'm like I'm friends with the the band yeah and they're like why aren't you over there then right and I'm like I think they know me I'm just staring at my phone do you like text me

yes so I'm like once we get kicked out we can't get back in so then one of the band members comes out and he's standing out in the middle of the floor two of them bass player league guitarist hanging out and they see Ari and now Ari I wanted to be the hookup guy but they recognize Ari because he's nine foot twelve and three hundred years old he's like Yoda he's Joe camel they go hey Ari should be an Ari doesn't give a fuck he walks right over there he starts talking so now he's the no he's in with that big ugly mug but he's solo he doesn't care about any of us so we're getting pushed out and I'm like well I

think they'll be guys like literally shopping and Apollo yes I'm like Apollo 13 so I'm like I think we should be getting we're all good so then I see Ari and I go well let me talk to them real quick because they're like they know me so they're like oh there's Joe it so I go let me go say hi you guys wait here so I go over it now I'm talking to Ari and the band members and they do know me they're like hi Joe list we're fans this is so cool why are you kidding I'm fans of yours and then I look over and I just see like Joe they're all getting kicked out and they're like well we're with him and he's with the band and then

the band guys go oh they're kicking everyone out here come back you finally reapers about time but now I'm torn because Ari is with two band members and they're going in the back but my I look over my wife and my my my best pal the number one hang of all time above you they're getting thrown out oh no so I'm like this I'm like cool rock band or my wife and Wayne you know Wayne he loves you got to go rock band he's my number two hang so I'm like I let me grab my wife and one of the band members took it like this I go well I got all these people and one goes we'll bring them back and the other goes all right well take

care I was like I'm out but I was like no I want to be with you yeah yeah I want to be cool these people I'll leave these people if you want me to yes divorce so you know I'm a good guy you know I'm getting older so I go I'll go with them sorry and I watch Ari just go off with my boys devastated so now we're getting kicked out we're down the stairs we're trying to like walk slow but it's a you know it's like Union black ladies that'll sure get out get the fuck I know the type I'm like pissing my pants yeah yellow vest and they're like literally like get out of here they're like kicking us out

like an umpire I think they fixed my gas man I mean I was shitting my pants so I'm like okay and then I get the buzz text how the buzz and I'm like it's the manager she goes hey where are you and I'm like I'm getting kicked out I'm dying here you've been your goose and literally it's like a high-heeled boot my ass which I've always dreamed of sure so I come and I'm like we're out we're getting kicked out and she's like well where are you I'm like we're outside I'm like Jazzy Jeff yes yes so we're outside she goes wait right outside so now and these people I understand they're like Union they want to go home yeah they

don't give a fuck about white Reaper Ari Shafir they're like white people out of here yes yes I get it so now we're outside and everyone's like I guess you don't know the band and I'm like no no she's she's coming yeah and so finally the manager and Henry gets stuck he has to go piss so he gets stuck in there we're literally watching him in the hallway like where are my friends and we're like Henry out here and then someone else is like no stay in you're in your boomer so then the manager comes out and by the way smoking hot of course rock band gorgeous lady and she's like come on back in you're with me so

she's got the wristband the all-access she's telling the ladies like they're all with me and the ladies like I don't give a fuck they left so finally she's like I represent the band they these are guests of the band yeah and finally they go they can come back in everyone's getting researched everyone's getting searched which is so frustrating because you're like I just walked out I know I've been out for five seconds exactly I went out and got a shotgun I'm gonna come back and kill white reapers how they get a moment this is like alright well I get to win this one and I understand whatever its rules so we all get repatted

down there's like seven of us we're all getting repatted down then she leads us back upstairs to the thing and we see Ari is still down there with the hot guitarist guy they're making out sure we go upstairs and there's like a post hang but we're up with all the suits you hate the suit it's like the record people guy and a couple band members we meet the other band members and they're very sweet like we're fans of yours and I'm like I'm fans of yours and then we talk pearl they open for Pearl Jam and they don't realize I'm like I saw you guys in 2016 in Asbury Park yeah come to all these shows I'm like I'm a huge fan

bubble we all blow each other but there's the green room with a security lady Ari's in there he's penetrated oh my god so it's like the band member and Ari every time the door swings open you just see Ari in there like and another thing and they're all like you gotta check out Jew on YouTube shut up the candles are gay yes so it's we get it you're Jewish whatever boo so it keeps open he's eating the candy he's got a cocktail he's got you know a woman's blowing them and I'm like God I want to be in there so and the band you can feel as we're talking to them they're like okay well good to me

we got to get back to the thing and I'm like I should be back there but I went from Matt and Sarah and Henry and you're a good egg you went down and yeah you gotta get the band back together but either way it was very fun it was fun meeting the band I met all but one of them but who I had messaged on Instagram before so I really wanted to meet him but very cool to meet the band so what's the story is Ari on tambourine now is he in the band oh I think he's too old so we leave there we end up going to the stand we sit me Sarah Henry just telling stories he's drinking beers we're eating pizza Ari comes over he's got a

bunch of free merch he's got a free t-shirt you're like oh that's cool you're in the green room yeah we didn't want to go it's too stuffy in there so we all hang till like one o'clock in the morning we go back and then we stay up he Henry's on LA time so we stay up till like 3 30 in the morning telling stories finally like I gotta bed this is insane and next morning we get up we bump into Steve Rogers we all go to breakfast diner breakfast just story after story after story and he's one of these guys there's no bitterness he's like who are the some of the good comics you're seeing which is so funny because I'm like we

only ever talked about the ones that suck I never had is nice so positive yeah he's so positive great stories great hang check out that podcast with Ari skeptic tank yeah I want to hear that and check out punching the clown one and two oh it's amazing yeah I'm in the second one yeah hen house has got a couple of movies he's got a ton of clips I think he's got a couple albums oh yeah great albums well punching the clown is the best movie about comedy ever it's one of my favorite movies ever killer lunch and then punching Henry is also amazing Sarah Silverman Doug Stanhope myself a bunch of people in it the other

guy yeah check it out what we watch punching the clown hammered I think on bulger's couch years ago that sounds right yeah I passed out at one point great film good times we got to be over yeah yeah we're good okay oh my god stuff I didn't get the springsteen I'll tease yeah he's with my dad it was amazing I cried but any jizz all right well we got a bunch of dates what is it April 4th damn dirty 41 in today holy Nazi dick you know I got a band hook up to from a Tuesday huh the blink-182 reunion came up and all the tickets were 700 bucks it's it's ticket master they have a new thing called dynamic pricing

so depending on the demand so I happen with Taylor Swift fuck these ticket cunts I asked me to do that and I said no I was like oh this sucks and I got a message from a guy who works for the the direct support band he's like I'm a huge Tuesday I'll get you into the show tickets to Boston yeah the game is coming through where we're like fight club we're underground no one talks about us but we're here and we're queer and we have bitch tits also you know anybody get jazz vest tickets I'm dying to go thank you very much where New Orleans okay cool yeah so what do you got Fanny where you at here let me find

the old book here well I got oh Jesus Wilbur theater April Nelly 15th those tickets are going fast that's a couple weeks two weeks from now next week next Friday next Saturday next Saturday Wilbur theater and we can after that I'll be at moon tower all week you know moon tower I'm alright god damn it I'll be at moon tower and then big month of May coming up May 4th to the 6th Tampa side splitters nice we got that Tempe improv 11 through the 13th May 20th I'll be up at the Boston Comedy Festival I think I'm getting an award which is exciting I believe yeah wow and then June 1st to the 3rd Spokane June 16 17 Columbus

funny bone July 13 through 15 Irvine improv July 20th to the 22nd San Jose improv and then August is crazy Providence comedy connection Portland Oregon helium August 10th through the 12th and then Dallas improv August 24th to the 26th a whole bunch of shit going on Canadian Joe lists for tickets and please for the love of fucking tits subscribe to my YouTube because that's where the specials going we need the algorithm and all that shit there you go and you're gonna check out that mother ship while you're at moon tower oh I'd like to yeah I saw that video of it it looks like unbelievable Paul Odo texted

Saturdays like the club is perfect it's a beauty it's two rooms it's killer but yeah yeah I'm all over the road Mark Norman comedy dot com sorry about the almonds almond brothers we got a Montana coming up Dayton Ohio Australia's in the books for early June I was wrong about the dates UK tours coming soon then we'll announce some other shit thank you special in a couple months got a right new material we love you I'm gay Springsteen Jackie whoo if you want to check out my podcast it's called fun bearable with a great comic named Ray Harrington my buddy Brad good episode to check out is the one with Ron on about

recording his last special sat down with us and talked a lot about Joe we talked about behind the scenes didn't cut anything he said we got to cut this stuff I said yeah I'll cut it didn't cut anything anything nice about Joe or yeah it was okay you know back and forth yeah everyone's human oh boy and no it was good stuff it was good stuff but Chuck gets everyone to listen Chuck knows what he's doing fun variable pod.com the episode with with Ron on his pinned at the top along with Joe's episode Mark's episode everybody's good stuff Chavone's gonna be on soon hey that's a fun hang he's a fun hang yeah numbers

are low but all right thank you guys