Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash - BONUS Bring On The Wives!

Episode Date: October 27, 2024

It's the episode we've all been waiting for! The wives are finally jumping on the podcast and ready to reveal the dirt on the Two Doting Dads.  Matt, Ash, Laura and April have put the kids to bed and are spending their weekend away by the beach, getting to know each other a little bit more.  From pet peeves to hidden talents to revealing the many lives of Ash Wicks, the laughs were so loud it's a surprise the kids weren't woken up.  Buy our book, which is now available in-store! https://www.penguin.com.au/books/two-doting-dads-9781761346552  If you need a shoulder to cry on:  Two Doting Dads Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/639833491568735/  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheTwoDotingDads  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/twodotingdads/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@twodotingdads  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I've told you this before, April can't pre-amp, does she? Yes, I'm better at it now. Pfft, you've been practicing. She's like, anyway, Laura, you look... Sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss Welcome back to Two Doting Dads and Two Doting Mums. I'm Matty J. I'm Ash. I'm Laura. And I'm April.

This is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good, it is the bad. And the relatable. And if you've come for any type of advice, stop right now because it's not going to happen, especially on this episode. I guess why you're wondering why are we coming to you today with a bonus episode? Because we just thought, wouldn't it be a delightful thing to do? Us two families coming together

and having just a joyous time. And then we thought we'll record. Look very confused. Not at all. I'm just listening. Stop judging us. Just sitting here. I feel so judged when she says'm just listening. Stop judging us. I'm just sitting here. I feel so judged when she's like... The experts here.

I know. She's all these years under a belt. I'm sorry that we're only ranked 155 in the country. It's not the content, it's the setup. I'm confused by the current setup. We're all sitting around naked right now. This is an orgy. The keys are in the bowl. We have decided to take two families away on a little getaway to the Central Coast.

We've decided to take two families on a little vacation to get to know each other a little bit better regretfully, I would say. What part of it do you regret? All of it. I've seen your feet way too many times. Yeah, you've covered up my toes, but I think you enjoyed it. You know when people give you an insult, but really they're like, they have some nice toes. So that's the vibe. So I was coming down the stairs before and I was like, gee, Marley's got some big feet. Really? And I

came around the corner, it was Laura. I was like, gee, Marley's got some hairy feet. No, they're not hairy. Thank you. Thank you very much. Take that back immediately. We currently are staying at a beach called Forest's Beach. For those of you people unaware, it is about an hour and a half north of Sydney. We're in like Ash's neck of the woods more so. We normally go down south for a trip away, but we thought we'll do this for the Wix's. Must be nice. Oh, shut up.

But it's gorgeous. We've got a really beautiful house. Beautiful. Right on the beachfront. And I just, I'm going to say it. It has been such a treat. It's been so fantastic. We've all gotten along so well.

This has been heaven. I do feel like I need to apologize though, because I heard on the phone yesterday. So Ash called and Matt was like, we're leaving at three. And I knew as soon as I heard him say that, like that actually was never happening. There was not ever a possibility that we were going to leave at three. I in fact had a doctor's appointment that started at three PM.

So we left at five o'clock and we called Ash as we were leaving and parting Bondi. And that was like, yeah, we're not that far. Like since we were supposed to be arriving at that time. And Ash was like, oh yeah, how long are you going to be? And Matt was like, like an hour and 45, which is the exact amount of time it takes to get to a vocab. Actually we've just left. It was funny cause I was in the car with April when Matt's like, yeah, three

o'clock we'll leave and then we hung out. Did I say that? Yeah, you did. I wasn't thinking when I said that. And then I looked at April and I went, what did I say? That's not going to happen. Yeah. 450.

Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I'm used to happen. Yeah. 450. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I'm used to it now. He's always late. I'm glad that you know who he is though. Like that's the person. I know, but I am so like irritatingly early to everything that I know he'll be late. And I'm still there early thinking maybe this time.

I've gotten better. I've gotten better, but actually I've been, I've been very surprised by you Ash for this trip because we did arrive late. We came in close to 6 PM, which with kids is really hard. It was 6.03. I think it was like 6.13. I think it's 6.13. Yeah, that's right. Thank you. That wasn't orange. I don't know if this was Ash or this was you April, but you guys had done the groceries. There was food on the table. You had fish tacos. Spill the beans there darling.

Who was it? It was a bit of both I'm going to say. No, I did. I did a big grocery shop before we came and then you ran to the groceries while we're here to get the things that needed to go in the fridge. The more critical things. Yeah. Yeah. That's how things. Yeah. Yeah.

That's how we planned it. I was like when the Johnson's get here, I want them to be fed. I was pleasantly surprised. There was food for the kids. There was food for us. We woke up this morning. I slept in when we say we woke up. Everybody else woke up.

I casually waltzed in at 7 a.m. and Ash had cooked breakfast. Like things were in the dishwasher. I could live like this more often. We should go away more. This has been great. Holiday Ash is a different to like everyday Ash. Is that always been the case? I was going to say, I think, no, I think holiday Ash is definitely goes above and beyond mainly because I feel like he caters to the whole family. He wants to make sure the whole family is quite happy, fed. He does, surprisingly.

I also want to make up for at home Ash is useless. Did you just call us family? Yeah. The whole family. Oh, the whole family. Yeah. Is that inclusive of- Me, Macy, Oscar, Ash and me.

Have you guys talked about how obsessed Macy is with Matt before? Is that made onto the podcast? Yeah, we briefly talked about her obsession with Matt. I think it started at Disney on Ice that you guys weren't performing. You were just watching. And just to clear that up. Thank you for clarifying. Matt was Aladdin this year.

Prince Charming. And Macy was like, the whole second act was like on your lap, I remember. And then when we went to leave. She gave her a cuddle and just wouldn't leave. And I was like, oh. We've got three children now. And then when it was time to go home, she just melted. No, you went to the bathroom. That's right. And you're like, Macy, we've just got to go to the bathroom. And she sobbed. And then you came back and she's like, he's back.

Well, I've been playing it pretty cool, calm and collected. I didn't want to come on too strong. She's too, hun. To Macy. Why? Just so maybe. No, last time he came on too strong to one of my kids, he tried to kidnap him. Oscar's still terrified.

I know. He tried to abduct him. So I was like, I don't want to do that again with Macy. So I'm just going to just like slow and steady. I'm going to warm up to her. I didn't want to give her a hug when I first saw her because I just, you know, I just wanted to come to me, not me come to her. And I feel like this is very satisfying for you considering that Lola wants nothing to

do with you. Ah, screw Lola. Lola's dead to me. Lola's out, Macy's in. Lola didn't hold my hand today, like through the zoo. She'll take any one of it back. She's like, well you've been my daddy. I know.

She looked up to check if it was you and realized it wasn't. It was like, this is cool. This is cool with me. Anyway, I'm going to go. I'm going to go. I'm going to anyone. She looked up to check if it was you and realized it wasn't. It was like, this is cool. This is cool with me. Anyway, it's been a fun little trip. I wish the weather was a bit better, but today I think we got really lucky. Lots of sun. Lots of sun. We went to the reptile park, which who's, I don't know who's a decision that was, but it was a great, great idea. We had the choice. Three choices, actually. One was a helicopter ride with me and Ash.

Should have taken that. Just the two of you. The second option was quad biking, but it was up in Newcastle. It was very kid-friendly activity. Love it. And so that would have been door to door, we would have been out of this house for four hours, which we decided against. And then the third option we thought, this seems like a good idea, was the Australian

Reptile Park. Jess Which I think Ash was particularly excited about considering that they had an entire section that was dedicated to the breeding of an endangered frog. And firstly, he said, I can't wait to see some frogs fucking. And then announced very loudly. Do you think they're doing it froggy style? Which are two of my favorite parts of today.

But also I was like, do you reckon they tie their hands behind the back too? And do it froggy style. The zookeeper was like, there was a guy, we got a code red. There was a guy standing up against a pole and he was like, Oh fuck, I better get out of here. So yeah, that was, uh, that was, that was lots of fun. I think like, dude, crocodiles are nuts. Just gonna throw that out there. That huge. Go on, go on. Okay. So we've got 45

minutes on crocodiles. I was going to say, don't you remember Oscar doesn't want to go back. He was terrified. He said he's not going back to that place. Yeah, he'll go back. He'll come around. He didn't enjoy it. No. He'd gone to sleep tonight.

He did say that now he's frightened of casuaries. Casuaries. Which is thanks to you, Laura. I'm not going to lie. I'm very sorry. So the cassowary was in its pen, right? And we were walking around from one pen to another pen looking at the animals. And I was like, oh, look everyone, it's a cassowary.

I can't say the word properly. Cassowary. Is that how you say it? Yeah. Casuary. It's a casual bird. Casu. It's a casu-rary. It's a weary casu. Anyway, there we were all looking at it. And I was like, those birds are super dangerous. And I was like, they can't get to us. Don't worry. It's in pen.

Why would you say that? Cause I was like, they're the most dangerous birds. Not like emus. People think they're emus, but they're not. They will rip you apart. Yeah, literally. Oscar's just absorbed everything you said and went to bed and terrified. I wonder how they fuck. I can't do that. I've always wondered how the cassowaries fuck. I was like, they're also breeding snakes.

I'm like, does the snake itself just enter the other snake? Why are you so curious about animal reproduction? It's just a hobby of mine. I just went downstairs to give Oscar a kiss and he goes, where do the cast of bears live? I was like- At the reptile zoo. I literally said the reptile park.

They're not coming here. Right outside. But that's the first time I've been there. Have you been there before? I've never been there. I've driven past it many times and always thought, gosh, I really should go to the reptile park one day. Here we are.

It's honestly one of the best like animal parks I've never been there. I've driven past it many times and always thought, gosh, I really should go to the reptile park one day. Here we are. It's honestly one of the best like animal parks I've been to. And we've been to a bunch through every, every time we travel, we go to like a zoo or some shit like that. And that's one of the best for sure. Cause it's way more interactive. Well that little sheet you get and you forget how much kids get into it when you get that little sheet and it's a checklist with like cross off if you see a turtle. Yeah.

But then you also have to like live with the like, Marley lost it. get into it when you get that little sheet as a checklist with like cross off if you see a turtle. Yeah. But then you also have to live with the like, Mali lost it. You didn't realize this, but three quarters of the way through the day, Mali lost her sheet. I don't know where you were, but it was perfect timing that you vanished. And Mali was like on the floor as a puddle screaming about the sheet. I thought that was an exotic meat checklist of what you've eaten.

I've had turtle. It's beautiful. Endangered? Is now. Is it Mick who does the crocodile? He's a warhorse that guy. There was this one guy who was the instructor at the zoo who basically was when you go and watch like the crocodile show or the alligator show he did every single show and he looked like kind of like a Steve Irwin or a crocodile Dundee. He'd been some weird shit. Let's be honest. I was actually thinking what kind of guy is on the outside. I think he's lovely.

Mick, if you're listening, it's just the Wixers who are suspect on you. I think you're great. Sir Johnson's been really, really about you. Why were all the animals pregnant? My only issue with, I'm going to call them Mick. So there was two crocodile, an alligator enclosure. They're the vegetarian ones. Thank you Ash.

The American crocodiles called alligators. American alligators, that's what they were. There we go. There we go. So we have one pen with those crocodiles. The other one. I think they're alligators. Do you know what the Latin name is for American alligator? Go on.

It's alligator Mississippi. Boom. There you go. How do you know that? I'm very observant. Yeah, weird. Carry on. You're like the Rain Man.

Then there was the other crocodile pen on its own, the Australian crocodile. And do you remember he did that show and he said, if I was to put this crocodile with the alligators, he would kill them all once and then kill them all twice. Do you remember that part? Yeah, 100 percent. Because Oscar was like, who would he kill? Marley was like, why is he going to kill everyone? Yeah. What about Matt's impression? Have you ever seen the soul leave a man's eyes when you choke him out?

And the kids were like, what? And they're like, Mick, back on, back on to the show, back on script. He's like, 88 crocodiles died because of this one. What about he was like, I was in the toilet at that time. So I missed it. So he goes, if we were to put this crocodile, which is the Elvis, the big bad one, 60 year old Elvis, 60 year old Elvis, who's 5.4 meters long. If you were to put him in with all those other vegetarian alligators, he would kill them

all 44 of them in 24. And then because of his serotonin levels and lactic acid builder. Thank you, Bindi Owen. He would go back and kill them all again. Twice. Why? Oh yeah, just for fun. He was like, I said, what's this guy like on the outside? And then Ash was like, will they, will they fuck? Are they going to?

I think that's illegal. I don't know. Uh, we're very informative. I thought that. Great show. Great show't know. We're very informative. I thought that. Great show. Great show. Also, Bluey was on stage. Just, it had it all.

It really is. Like, I mean, 10 stars. But it goes to, when it comes to animal parks, I think it was very much right up there. Yeah. It's good for our kids. It did kind of like take the wind out of me. I got home and I was like, I'm bloody tired. Yeah.

Yeah. It took up like 10,000 steps. It's a big day. I was saying that. It's a big day. Everyone was like, what are we really going out for dinner? And I was like, yeah, it'd be fun. She was like, I'm a one activity day gal.

And then I look outside and Laura's got all four kids on her own, Macy on the hip. And you're just wandering off down the beach. And I'm like, what are you doing? I'm going to baptize all four of these children. Basie was like, I'm frightened of the big waves. I was like, oh, I'm on the number one. You're scaring our children. I was like, you're fine, we'll keep you away from the waves.

And then the sound of the rain, and Laura's like, everybody, stop! No, you're happy? So we were down the beach. I was having a lovely time with the four kids. We were making shelters and collecting sticks. And then the two of you came down and you brought a football and then you kicked the football and the football went flying through the air and on three separate occasions, almost hit the kids. So then I took them further down. But did it hit the kids? No, it was very

close though. And I wasn't going to deal with that. So then I walked them further down the beach away from the two of you so that they could continue to play. And as this is all happening, the weather changed really quickly. And so then I had all four kids, they've all collected treasures, but they're all screaming because it started to rain. And so I've got Macy on the hip. I've got Marley and Oscar, like they're both kind of running up the beach. But then Lola's like, Marley, treasures!

Screaming in the rain as it's like the wind whipping, the rain's happening. I look over and there's Matt and Ash just stopped like having a lovely chat to two people on the beach. I'm talking, it's like Armageddon. Oscar was running like he'd come under fire. It has literally like the weather just turned. It's Armageddon outside and they're having a lovely chat. And I'm like, Matt, get your daughter, someone get Lola. You would have thought we're in a tornado. Anyway.

Oh, excuse me, no. And we get inside. Eventually, like, if you were these poor people who were clearly too dirty in dad's pants, you would have thought that I was insane. And that's okay. So then we get upstairs and the kids come inside and I pick up my phone, I go to my messages and I get a lovely message from a lady named Lucy coming. And Lucy says this, Hi Laura, I just saw the two boys at the beach and I told

them how much I loved who doting dads, but I also really wanted to pass along how much I'm a fan of life uncut and I am a ride or die lifer and I'm so upset that I missed my chance to come and meet you guys properly. But you were running after the children and screaming. Have the best weekend out. I'm a local here. Very cute. So Lucy, shout out to Lucy.

You know what you should do? She literally leaves across the road. You should message her back. Have you messaged her back? I did. And what did you say? Fuck off. I did not.

I said, no, no. I was so busy yelling at Matt to come and help me with Lola and she was cracking it because of the rain. I'm sorry. I must have sounded like a screaming banshee, which is pretty standard. And fight her over tomorrow. Come on.

Join the family. One more couple wouldn't hurt. It's going to make the keys in the bowl thing a little less awkward. Bit of a mix. Currently, currently it's a 25% chance I'm going to end up with my own keys. Very good. We do have a game to play. It's called spin the bottle. Before we play that, I do just want to say sometimes going away on holidays with other families can be a disaster, but this has gone pretty good. Yes. I feel like when you're living inside the same house as well, it can always be.

A bit pear shaped. Yeah, but no, 24 hours and we're still smiling. I think the lack of Ellie in this situation, really keep me everyone calm. I almost brought her. Ellie's amazing. She is amazing. She does radiate on a different stress level.

She's so frazzled. I love it. Honestly. Does she listen? When I always throw, whenever she's already frazzled, I always throw something else in there to see if I can get a little bit more frazzled. The thing that's interesting is that she would deny that she's frazzled. Oh yeah.

So she, huh, what, huh, yeah, huh. I'm not frazzled. That's not frazzled. She's just, that's just how she communicates in a very staccato fashion. How did a compliment for the weekend turn into a bashing of my mum? Ellie, we love you. I don't think you finished a compliment as well. Keep going.

Yeah, we want to hear more. No, it's been great. It's all worked out really well. And obviously the kids have had little arguments, Noughts and Crosses arguments. Who bring the exercise ball? Come on guys. The kids are obsessed with each other.

No, the exercise ball was here at the, we're staying in a beautiful house, but there's like, you know, there's activities, there's exercise balls. There's, I mean, that's great. Peloton bikes. I was going to sneak into your bedroom early this morning and do a peloton

workout, but that didn't happen. Even though you were the last one to wake up. Makes sense. I was going to sneak in for an afternoon peloton bike without you guys knowing. You guys were still asleep. You really got me there. She roasted you there.

Gotcha. So we're going to play a game. We are. Yes. We're going to figure out which couple knows their partner the best. Oh, it won't be me. I'm terrible at this. But it's, it's not, I don't think.

We've got double the years on you, I think. We do. How many years? How many years? 13. 13 years. You've been together for 13 years. Ripe old age of-

How old are you? 14. I'm 34. April's also 34 soon. I was gonna say I'm 33, mate. Okay, spring chicken. Gosh guys, that's very young. Isn't it, it's beautiful to see.

Stunning. Yeah, look, we're a bit over it. Yeah. Okay, Springtree. Gosh, guys, that's very young. Isn't it? It's beautiful to see. Stunning. Yeah, look, we're a bit over it. Yeah. It's the humor that keeps us going. If that dried up, fuck. Yeah, without humor, we'd be nothing.

April's very funny. Tell me, how long ago was it, the photo that you showed me of Ash last night? Oh, the biceps? That was, are you talking about a bicep photo? I feel like Ash has had like many versions of himself. And this is probably why, I mean, 13 years of being together. I'm currently transitioning. 13 years of being together.

It's like, you're kind of just dating a new person. Like at one point. Every three years, it's someone different. I like that. That's why she's still with me. That's what I mean. It's like, it's not the same Ash. There's this photo of Ash, which will be put up on the Two Doting Dads social page on their Instagram.

With Ash having like the biggest bicep, I don't know what the other one looked like, but the one I could see was enormous. And then there's like another video where you were just like ripped, like you're a marathon runner. Like what's, where were you at in life? What are you going through? Tell me your traumas. I could do it all, babe. I can tell you. I was there. I was in my Geordie Shaw phase. You're very much an extremist. So I feel like you went through a real gym junkie phase, went through it like, you know, you're a carnivore, then you're a vegetarian, then you-

I was a vegetarian for six years. You go through your phases and I'm just like, whatever. Which phase has been the best and which has been the worst? The best? This one. I feel like- It's like a comedian over here. No, I feel like, yeah, I feel like you're doing the best, like version of

you at the moment. Like you, you do. I'd strongly disagree, but okay. Yes. No, you know what I mean? I like, yeah, look, I, yeah, I don't know. Yeah. The worst version obviously is like Oscar early days, which is like the worst version

of both of us. Yeah. That was pretty fucked. But that's another time. And now you're great. And now, no, I feel like, yeah, I feel like you're doing the best version of you at us. Yeah, that was pretty fucked. But that's another time. And now you're great. And now, no, I feel like, yeah, I feel like you're good. Thank you. I'm proud of you guys.

Yeah, we're really breaking down the barriers over here. Very true. And Matt knows this. Only knowing me a couple of years and what sort of person I'm like, I cannot do things in halves. I either don't, I either don't do it or I'm like, fucking that's it. I'm running a hundred K's this week. Yeah, but then you get over it. Then you do an activity until you're like absolutely like

punched into the ground. And then you're like, I'll never do it again. It's usually an injury. There's always an injury. It's like, Oh, I can't do this now. Like vasectomy. It's tough having kids. I was obsessed. Okay, April, I'm going to ask you the first question. Oh gosh. Okay. So you're trying- Is there a prize attached to this?

Is there a reason why we're trying to get to the bottom? Who knows? They're kind of better. It's just, I think this will be like an annual weekend away that we do. So we don't have like a- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You're committing me to this.

Annual. A biannual? A biannual. weekend away that we do so we don't have like a world of. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You're committing me. Annual. A bi-annual. A bi-annual. There's no prize. Long story short. April, first question.

What would Ash's favourite meal be which is cooked at home? Well, for starters, it's something you cook because I don't cook. I don't cook either. I love that for us. Oh good. Yeah. I hate cooking. I hate cooking.

Your favourite meal to cook? I don't know. Like when we're cooking, we're cooking. I don't know. I don't know. I don't cook. I don't cook either. Oh, good. I love that for us. Good. Yeah. Hate cooking. Hate cooking. Your favourite meal to cook. I don't know. Like, would it just be a good old steak? You love steak. That's not it, is it? I love that you're trying to convince me.

You love steak. Come on, tell it to me. That's your answer. Change it if it's not. No, it's not steak, obviously. Yes, babe. I'll change that right now. Ash, what is it?

It's wings or a good cheeseburger. You don't cook wings. I did for a long time there. Then I injured myself. I felt sorry for the chicken. Okay, wings. Yeah, you're right. Buffalo wings. You haven't cooked them in a while.

You usually order them. That's why I got confused. Start again. Start again. That doesn't count. No, it does. Next question. Laura, what would mine be? Something to a salmon, cooked salmon, salmon and vegetables. I'm locking in salmon. I'm gonna go with chicken schnitzel. I'm with you because he's the sort of guy will get, if you get Thai, he'll get like a...

He'll pan fry a salmon. That's his thing. He'll get like a salmon curry. The weirdest salmon stir fry. A salmon curry? No judging. My question is, is it a home cooked meal or is it an order meal? Home cooked. It's going to be a pan fried salmon with like your vegetable salad thing that

you make on the side, baked veggies with salad. Wrong. It's a lamb roast. Oh, since when? Yeah. Since The Bachelor. We both got that wrong. We actually played this game on The Bachelor and I know the answer at the

time was a baked salmon. What's happened in seven years? This is for Laura. Oh. What do you think Matt's pet peeve is about you? Oh, there's so many. I just, just want to be fine. Um, that I don't always have a shower before going to bed and I wash my feet in a sink.

Yeah, that sucks. Yeah. That's weird. Yeah. Because I, okay. I'm kind of into it. Back to the feet. Hear me out.

I can't go to sleep with dirty feet. You have to wash your feet before you get into it. Before you go to bed tonight, I'm going to the feet. Hear me out. I can't go to sleep with dirty feet. You have to wash your feet before you get into it. You have to wash your body. Before you go to bed tonight, I'm going to sniff them. If you're really tired and you don't want your husband to have sex with you and you're wearing pajamas, you just put pajamas on and get into bed. And then he's like, I've got clean feet, but I'm just going to go to bed. That's incorrect.

I'm very confused. Look, and I've seen footage of her washing them in a sink and then brushing her teeth in the same zinc. I feel like that's more of it than just hopping in the shower. Two minute shower, quick in out done. I don't like showers. You guys should get one of those like drive through car washers for your house. And you just strip your clothes off, walk through.

It just goes, whoosh. But I hate being wet. I like, I actually don't enjoy a shower that I do it because it's a necessity. I'll take four showers a day easily. That's because you stink. Thanks, Betts. That's all right. April, what do you think Ash's pet peeve would be about you? So funny enough, I remember someone asked, like we did a similar game at my hens. How many years ago? Seven years ago.

Oh, that was ages ago. I've grown some new pet peeves. I was going to say my pet peeve, your- Pet peeve about you. About me was clicking my toe. Oh yeah, that sucks. You click your toe? Oh, look, honestly, I've grown into it. Can you show them?

Yeah. Like, is it like a- No, no, no, no. It's way more- Can you hear that? You have like a, like a floating bone in your toe or something. I don't know. It's fine. You can do that with your shoulder or something.

My thumbs. You know when you go to like a concert or something and they like count the people coming in? Should I? Is that my new career? Is that what you're saying? You just do it with your feet. Your chimpanzee. Wait, so I'm going to start again. That's not it. So you can't have two bites of the cherry. No, I was just saying that's what it was seven years ago. Yeah. But it's changed.

You haven't done it in ages. I shamed you. So I haven't done it maybe since seven years ago. Um, so your pet peeve about me now is probably my overthinking. Is that a pet peeve? Would you call that acting like Frank? A hundred percent. For those not aware, Frank is April's dad, who is lovely.

But he's the most cautious human being. No, no, no. Let's not bash Frank. I will not have it. Future Frank here. I know. Matt's like, one of us, one of us. Yes, April, we're going to put you on the spot here.

And what was Ash's childhood dream? Probably to be a surfer, pro surfer. She's hit the nail straight on the head there. Was that right? Yeah. Well done. Well done. Childhood dream?

Still, still dream? Still a childhood dream. Still dreaming. Chuck the web suit on every day. Shout out. Just a case, get called in. I think your childhood dream would have been to be a pro cricketer. He's very good with a ball in his hand.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Any athlete, but cricket would have been probably number one. You are good with a bat and ball in your hand. Guilty. Okay. Well, at least I got one right. Well done. Well done everyone. I was expecting more of a reaction than that, but there was nothing. Sorry. You were like any sport, but I'll take cricket.

Internally. You got the answer right. I got it right. If you shower tonight, I will definitely have sex with you. You're like, sport, but I'll take cricket. Internally. You got the answer right. Then you spat on me. I got it right. If you shower tonight, I will definitely have sex with you. You're like, I'll definitely spit on you. Ew. If you wash your feet and hands. But that's absolutely not going to happen. When you wash your feet.

Both of our children are sleeping in our room tonight, so that's not happening. And both of your children are sleeping in your room tonight. So no one's getting anything on them. There's a spare bedroom upstairs. That's true. And I'll be asleep in that one. Uh, when you do wash your feet in the sink, do you then wash your hands after? Well, you wash your hands cause you're washing your feet.

So it's all getting washed. Would you wash them separately after? Yeah. I mean, like it's all- Like that was the biggest lie. You just washed them all at once. You just said that to not seem like such a weirdo. Well. You're like, I actually lick my hands clean.

But I wash my feet until my feet are clean. I don't just give them a rinse. Like they're washed. But then I feel like your hands are dirty. Laura, this is for you. What is Matt's favorite way to spend a weekend? Matt's favorite thing would be to go to the gym at some point. Friday night sex. To go for a swim at the beach, have sex on Friday night.

Scheduled. What else would it be? I mean, at the moment, if we could, it would be to go down the coast. Your Friday night sex is in my calendar. But that is, I reckon it would be just something that has the beach in it. Yeah. Is your favorite weekend. You may sound a bit lame though.

Oh, he really likes to go to the beach. He. Yeah. Is your favorite weekend. Maybe it sounded a bit lame though. Oh, he really likes to go to the beach. He really likes to go to the gym. I don't know, it sounds wholesome if you ask me. Just do classic Saturday night orgy. What else? What else do you want to do on the weekend? That's it. That's everything.

Yeah, I don't know. The farmers markets I'm not really into. It's just a good way to suck up a couple of hours with kids. I love going to the farmers market. It's pretty lame. So it's your ideal weekend. I know. Yeah.

If you throw the farmer's market in there and then going to, um, Bondi fish for lunch, that's like the perfect weekend. That's it. Oh, couldn't be better. You guys are proper adults. That sucks. Go on. Oh, I was going to say all day surfing.

No kids, no family activities. Bingo. Oh, I was going to say all day surfing, no kids, no family activities. Bingo. No, I was more thoughtful than that. Well, okay. Well, let me have a second guess. There's definitely a surf session in there and then maybe like a pub, friends, chill, drinks vibe in the afternoon.

I think you got the AVO right. Yeah. But I don't mind the- Can I jump in? Sorry? May I? No. Manly, home game.

Oh, so funny. We're on the way here from the reptile park and we'll talk about death. And- Was that after the cassowary? Something Laura mentioned. Yeah. I was like, if I die by cassowary, I want you to sprinkle my ashes across Book Valeo.

And she goes, I'm not fucking doing that. Yeah. He wanted to sprinkle his ashes on the Book Valeo. That's because I want the seabirds to step all over me. He's like, promise me. I was like, I'm not promising that, sorry. I want those cheerleaders to step all over me.

What was it? Look. I said a combination. Okay. I said, I don't, I do like, this is a lie. I do like a family day, but is that the lie with a couple of beers in the Arvo? Yeah. Pretty chill. Without the family. Give or take. Optional. Go Celebrity Crush. Okay. Steph Clare Smith. Give or take. Optional. Go celebrity crush. Steph Claire Smith. No.

Yeah. I fucking hope she doesn't hear this. That's so funny. I actually, do you know what? I actually totally forgot about that until last night when you guys were obviously talking about the interview and blah blah. And I was like, fuck, that was his celebrity crush. And I killed it. And I killed it. Come on. I did very well. He did very well.

That's so funny. But I actually didn't write that down. So you didn't write her down. No. Because that's weird now. So your celebrity crush. Crush. You shush me.

Celebrity crush. You're never going to guess. I'm never going to guess. This is a secret. So your celebrity crush. Crush. You shush me. Celebrity crush. You're never going to guess. I'm never going to guess. This is a secret.

So who is it Ash? Liz Hurley. You have never said that. I get it. She's hot. Who's mine? I don't know yours. It's meant to be now or when you were a kid.

Because yours was like Buffy when you were a kid. Buffy. Never was Buffy. What was your name? I didn't have like a weird vampire kink. I was like, oh, bite me. You were, you told me you were like really into Buffy and also into love. What was her name?

Love Hewitt. Yes, Jennifer Love Hewitt. Halle Berry. Scarjah. Halle Berry, wow, yeah. What's the movie that? Yeah, Halle Berry. Monster's Ball. 007. Okay. Yeah. What's the movie that?

Halle Berry. Monsters Ball. 007. Okay. Do you have a different one now? No. Now she's here. Oh, shut up.

Did you have anyone else written down? Not really. Not really? That's not a- Well, like, I don't know. These days, these days. You like the chick on that movie tonight. You always talk about Sandra Sully.

Who? Oh, that was Salma Hayek. Oh, she's awesome. She's spicy. Beautiful. Sandra Sully. I do love Sandra Sully. Are we just going to go for newsreaders here? Whenever I see Sandra Sully, I'm always like, ah. He loves Sandra Sully.

And I am convinced that he has a romantic crush on Sandra Sully. I've seen that. Yeah. I understand why. Okay. What's Matt's hidden talent? Not hidden. Matt tells everyone about things that he has a romantic crush on Sandra Sully. I've seen that. Yeah. I understand why. Okay. What's Matt's hidden talent? Not hidden. Matt tells everyone about things that he's good at.

What are you good at? You're not. Your talents are many, but they're not hidden. What's your hidden talent? Yeah. What's one that's like, no one really knows about you? You can't even think of one. Your lack of foreskin.

I don't really have any hidden talent. That's also the problem. We're very good at sports. You're very, actually, here's one. You're very fast. He's very fast. He's very fit, but I don't think that that talent is hidden. It's got long legs. It was hidden from me.

And I was like, oh, Rasha, my centipede legs. And you took off like a cat's mouth. You're quite fast. No, not anymore. Not anymore. Pudgy, fucking stumpy legs over here. Matt is like, he's very athletic, but I feel like that that's kind of relatively known.

I got to the finish line and there was a fire in my fucking, between my thighs. I'm sensing sprint races tomorrow. No. On the sand. You can race Oscar, he's pretty quick. He is quick. What's mine?

He's very quick. I don't think it's hidden. What? I don't know, you play the guitar? Nah. He tried to serenade us today. What do you mean by tried? Because you renamed a Coldplay song.

No. What did you call it? No, Aeroplane by I guess Julie Stone. Yeah. Oh, and it was a leaving on a poo plane? Yeah, for the kids. Not, it wasn't for you. I thought you were trying to serenade me.

No. Believe me. What's your hidden talent? I wrote down that I can solve a Rubik's Cube in under a minute. That's very good. But I would say not many people would know that Ash can play guitar and sing. That's hidden. What do you mean?

Yeah, like no, literally only me and Oscar and Macy know that. That's true. So I was right. These ones are, I've lost track who's winning. It's a tie, I reckon. There's no winners or losers around here, mate. We're all having fun. Right, guys?

This is the best time of my life. This one- You've really changed just your stance because you wanted to win. You're like, fuck, I'm winning this. Oh no, I'm getting bloated, so I had to put a pillow in there. I've had half a glass of wine. I could feel my, I was like, do I undo my pants

or do I just put a pillow in front of myself? Ash, stop it. We're getting too comfortable with each other. Guys, we have four questions left. These are all travel based. This will decide which couple knows the other partner the best. April, do you remember your first holiday together without kids? First holiday, I'm going to say, so we got together, sorry, I'm doing a history. Well, we're talking about this. I'm literally thinking 13

years ago. So we got together in April. And I reckon- I've been 13 years in April. Oh! Do you get it? Yeah, I got it. You are cute! I'm like, ew. Yeah, but it's also in the month of April. So I was like, in April.

Anyway, fuck, whatever. I think our first holiday was overseas. No, was it not? We remember we went to see my parents. Is that a holiday? It's a nightmare. I think that was a, let's go meet your parents. I wore a suit.

Did you? Okay. Let's forget that. Okay. Laura. What was our first holiday? Our first holiday technically was to Thailand. After, after bachelor.

Okay. So after bachelor, we went to one of your friend's weddings in Toowoomba. That was our first trip together. And then we went on our first actual holiday, just us as a couple to Bali. Yes, very good. I couldn't remember any of that. Well, it was great.

Toowoomba. What did you write down? Toowoomba, where's Toowoomba? Toowoomba's in Queensland. Not to disrespect anyone from Toowoomba. We had a great time. I mean, you don't remember it, but it was beautiful. What do you think Matt's dream holiday is without kids?

To go to Malta, to go to Europe or Greece. To the farmer's markets in Mexico. To go to the farmer's markets. And then straight to the closest fish restaurant. And go to the gym. No, it would be, if it didn't have kids, it would be to go to Greece or he always talks about Malta. He's been there and he thought it was amazing. But yeah, I don't think that that's going to happen for a while without kids. Unfortunately.

Yours would be the Maldives surfing. Close. I said Indonesia. Same thing. What was the first family holiday that you took? Oh gosh. I feel like this is, I'm at a disadvantage because I feel like you would have had time to think about this. That's part of the game, mate. Uh, first family holiday. Wouldn't it have just been down South?

Nope. Nope. Oscar was six months when we went down South. Where? For Rhiannon's wedding. You could be right. Yeah, I'm right. You're right.

The one I remember is we went to Byron and remember that the car seat we got was too big. So we paddled it out with towels from the hotel. That's right. That will be safe. And we kept the towels. Our first trip was to Europe with Marley. She was three months old. Oh, boozy.

But it was... Must be nice. We're like, Byron Bay! We went down to the shopping centre. We went to the moon. Must be nice. We're like, bar and pay. We went down to the shopping center. We went to the moon. Must be nice. In our helicopter. Why, why?

No, I was doing a job. I was working for Next, who's like a clothing brand. And they wanted to do, they wanted us to go over there and do work over there. But I just had Marley and I was like, well, obviously I'm only going to go, if Matt can come, if Marley can come. And we all flew there on next.

So thank you, next. It was a great, it was a fantastic holiday. That was a job. So, and then we went on an actual holiday. One of the best holidays we've had. It was, and it was before the time when you could like not travel with kids. Everyone, everyone was like traveling with a newborn.

That's insane. Why would you do it? But she was actually amazing. She slept the whole time. We had the most amazing holiday. And then when she turned one, I was like, traveling with a newborn, that's insane. Why would you do it? But she was actually amazing. She slept the whole time. We had the most amazing holiday. And then when she turned one, I was like, oh, you could, you could never do this. That would be hell on earth. So we could never travel with Oscar. Like if we did like Europe with Oscar, no way.

He can't even drive 30 minutes here from the reptile park. If the GPS changes one minute goes, you know, traffic goes from like 24 minutes to 25. It goes, it said 24 a minute ago. Yeah. Have you spoken about Oscar's? Not yet. Not yet. I was like, how did it, first of all, how do you know what a minute is?

And then I was like, also, butt out. He's obsessed with numbers. So he loves watching it. Like he'll literally sit in his car seat and he's like, what is it? I can see 24 minutes, 25 minutes. Yeah. And it goes back up. It's like, yeah, yeah. April, what does Ash think that your travel weakness would be? I think just not having a routine. Like I'm like, you've got no sense of direction. Oh yeah. 100%. I have no idea. I don't even have sense of direction at home. How am I going have a sense of direction at home.

How am I going to have a sense of direction travelling? What direction does the sunrise? I know this one. Go. East. Good job. I didn't know that. You didn't know that?

I didn't know that. I knew that. I was like, it's overlawn. I knew that because we've always grown up on the beaches and I always knew it rose. Must be nice. Yeah. Oh, you know. Thank you for saying that. It is. For once we get a must be nice.

What's my travel weakness? I actually don't know. I don't know. Everything's chaos, but I don't know what you would think would be. It's gotta be. Yeah. Not showering. I went to India and didn't wash my food the whole time. Actually, no, I washed myself a lot more in India. It's very sweaty, very humid.

Get that India. I would say it would be the fact that you don't unpack your suitcase once you come home. You neither do you though. It's not about me. But this is on you. That's a man's right. Also, we're not even on holidays anymore. So that's not really a travel weakness.

How long do you leave it for? However long it takes. Oh my God. Like a week? Two weeks? I get home, I put the load of washing on. April's like 12 loads of washing. Well, usually I try and do the washing before I leave.

So often it's clean stuff that's in there. And you still just put it away. And I just leave out of it for at least a fortnight. And then I put it away. Smart. I'm with you. All right, last. Sometimes I just zip it back up. Like if we have people coming over and instead of putting

stuff away, just zip it all back into the suitcase. We just moved and I threw a whole bag of stuff out. I won't go to bed until it's all done. No matter what time I get home. Wow. I had a backpack of stuff from Perth. Just threw it out. Wow. Cause I was like, I'm not going through that. Do you know what was in it? Or are you going to, is it going to be like two weeks time and you're going to be like, oh wow, I really want that shirt.

Then you're like, fuck, I think it was in that suitcase. Yeah. Your mentality is like, I'll just buy it. Buy a new one. Okay. Well, that must be nice. Like you can't, I'm sorry. No one's throwing- From an op shop. No one's, oh shut up.

No one's throwing away a whole suitcase because they can't be bothered to put it away. I said backpack. Very different. Oh, sorry. Sorry. It didn't have wheels. Yes, it was a 75 litre backpack. All right. Last question.

This is the last one. This is a tiebreaker, I think. What do you think Matt thinks your travel strength is? I think I'm relatively adaptable. So like if things don't go to plan. You always check your feet could fit in the sink wherever you go. Things often don't go to plan when we travel together, because we're both quite unorganized. Matt's more organized than I am.

No! He's much more organized than I am. Matt's like the booker. He's the one who organizes the holiday. And I'm a holiday princess. I just rock up and I'm like, where do you point me? Like, where's the fridge with the rosé? Where do you point me? Starved! Where do you point me? Starved. So often things go wrong, but I'm always okay with it. I don't care.

Like recently when we went to, I had to go to India with my sister for work and we rocked up at the airport and her visa had expired, which meant she could no longer travel to India. And I had to travel by myself and I was like, it's cool. Whatever. You'll get there in a couple of days. Like, I feel like I'm very go with the flow when things go bad. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. What do you think it is? Totally agree. It would take a lot to derail you. whatever, you'll get there in a couple of days. Like I feel like I'm very go with the flow when things go bad. Yeah, I like that.

What do you think it is? I totally agree. It would take a lot to derail you. To rattle me. Yeah. I think- I'm just here for a good time, guys. Here for a good time.

And I probably now would like to rethink my, the travel weakness, because that would maybe be it, is the fact that you're just like, whatever, we'll just like- See, I know you better than you know you about me. Wait, so you're saying that her weakness is, you're saying it's actually a strength. Is this a job interview?

No, I would say, I would say now I'm rethinking the weakness would be the fact that, um, you're not so detail orientated, but I know that, I know that I could throw you in any country, any situation and you'd be like, sweet, hit the ground. Absolutely running. What did you think it was? Like what was that? No, you wrote something down. No, no, I didn't write anything down.

It was for once. He's me and I'm him. It's all up here. Yeah. See, so you had nothing planned and you just went with whatever I said then. And you're like, yeah, that's a good answer. I'll agree. Is that what just happened?

We'll be right. We'll be right back. April, what do you think? I think your travel strengths are. My organisational skills. It's so fucking annoying. Yeah, I was going down the complete opposite. Hang on a second.

We would travel together so well. April can organise everything. I wrote this specifically. Organised. Annoyingly so. Yeah, I'm not like listening to you. I'm like, is something blows up? I'm like, fuck. So I'm, I'm so, maybe because I'm a middle child, but I'm so used to traveling with my sister and she is very a personality type. So it's almost conditioned me to be the opposite. So I know that if I'm traveling with her, which I do for work a lot, I just don't organize anything because she has an idea and she also doesn't like it.

Except for a visa, obviously. No, but funnily enough, the reason for that is because she was so organized. So she, she's out organized herself. So with India, you've got, you get a 30 day visa, right? But that visa is only applicable for 30 days from the day that you apply. But she applied for it thinking, and you still have to submit your date. So she applied with the dates that she was traveling

thinking that the visa was approved for the dates that were specified. But she did it so early that it was- But she did it so, so early that it had expired- That's something everyone would do. In a day. Everyone together is just like, I swear to God I have a visa.

I'm pretty good at reading fine print. Yes. Give yourself a two. Is that a little jab at Alicia? But I reckon we would travel great. Like unfortunately April would do all of the organizing and probably be very resentful by the end of it but I'd be like woo I'm ready. She'd also do all your washing.

Can you come and unpack my suitcase April? Except of your feet. It's a tie. It's a tie. It's a tie. I don't know what it was, but I'm happy for it to be. No one's keeping score. I think these guys know each other better. Well after 18 years.

Let's throw the keys in the barrel and find out. That is it. I can't believe the kids haven't woken up. We're at the top of the house. And they probably have. We're so far away from their room. We wouldn't know if the cashier got them or not. The cashiery.

The cashuary, okay. The cashuary. But that's the end of this episode. We're going to go to bed. I'm going to watch the end of the football. Thanks so much for having us guys. Hey, it's been a pleasure. Next time.

This isn't my house. Can I request having some headphones next time if I ever make it back on here? Absolutely. April, any requests? No, I just won't be back on. More Rosé. Yes, you will. You say this now. This is your second one.

Do you know what she does? She listens to herself. She goes, fuck, I'm good. Yeah, very funny. You don't tell people that. Very funny. Laura, if people have liked this episode, what should they do? If you have a like the episode, go and hit subscribe because you should be subscribed so that it goes into your inbox every week

And also leave a lovely review five stars would be nice wouldn't it? Tell the boys how much you like them and also how much you like life on cut while you're at it And April where can they find us on Instagram? To doting dads? Yes. Yeah in the creep section And we'll get out of here. That's from it guys. Thank you. That's it from us guys Thanks out of here. That's from it guys. Thank you. That's it from us guys. Thanks. Bye. See you guys. I'm a little bit tipsy. Yeah. There she is. Two Doting Dance podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community.

We pay our respects to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadigal land.