Two Hot Takes - 25: Petty Problems.. They're Like Icebergs

Episode Date: July 22, 2021

Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by guest co-host Lauren! These two dive in on petty problems.. and how there’s often times a lot of other issues hidden underneath. First up are listener write-ins about a woman whose friend spiked her punch and another whose roomies boyfriend left her a bag of urine after a weekend trip. And then for the Reddit stories.. one woman wants to buy a horse with some extra student loan money, a man whose wife threw away his toy dinosaur, a woman whose boyfriend left her at the hospital to watch a football game, a woman whose boyfriend deleted all her gaming characters and threw her computer away, a woman who can’t decide what to get her boyfriend for his birthday after he got her nothing, an individual who pretended to be Christian, and a woman who shut a movie off on her boyfriend… As always your support is very appreciated: https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes Direct Inquiries: [e-mail]

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I'm your host, Morgan. And I'm Lauren. Petty problems. The petty ones sometimes end up being the fucking worst. Usually brings to light a lot more of issues going on in the relationship. What do you think our pettiest problem has been? Ours? Yeah.

Like, what's our pettiest fight? I don't know. You've had a lot. Hey, have we not? Like, I feel like all of our fights are petty. Like, or like any argument or disagreement we've had is usually like not that big of a deal. Yeah, I think we're both very sensitive people. Yeah.

And then we're just like, ah, we like bottle things up and then it like all comes out. What do you think our most petty fight is? I don't even know if I want to know it. It might start another petty fight. I, well, I was like thinking about asking you this question and I was like, I honestly can't think of one because I think like my pettiest fights I've had with friends, you're typically like the one to back me up. Like the episode with Josh, I talked about how I took an Uber from San Diego back to LA

and you came with me. Oh. And it was all over the fact that someone ate my Taco Bell food. That was kind of a shit show of a night though. Shit show? I think that was like your last straw. It was just because like you were fighting with Sarah, I think. And like everything was just going down the drain and all I fucking wanted after trying

to be a mediator was my Taco Bell and we, I don't know if like half of us just assumed that no boys were going to get invited over, but like boys were invited over and we were just like out there. It was, we were over it. We weren't on the same page. We were over it. Yeah. Yeah.

But I can't think of a petty fight we've really had. Yeah. Honestly, maybe me being mad at you that you twisted your ankle on our road trip. I was mad at you for being mad at me. See, petty fights you guys, but. How could you be mad at me? I was struggling. I wanted to have a good time.

I was in pain. You were like, she's faking it. It's like, oh, my ankle is huge. No, I didn't think you were faking your ankle. I thought you were being dramatic about your wrist at WeFest. WeFest. Yeah. Yeah.

That one honestly might have hurt even worse, but I was just like drunk the whole time because we were at a country, country music, music. Oh my God. What do you call these things? A country music festival. Oh, OK. Yeah. I kept wanting to say country music fest and I was like, that doesn't sound right.

That's the same thing. Same thing. OK. Yeah. I apparently my petty fights are started when you injure yourself. I'm apparently a big bitch because fuck, that sounds terrible. Those did really hurt. Those both of those times did.

Brains hurt worse than breaks sometimes. I remember I was trying to shave my legs and oh God. It was because it was my right hand. So like trying to shave your leg with your left hand. I don't know. I challenge you all to do it. No. So we've talked about this before unless you're unless you're obviously left handed.

So no, but we've talked about this before because I work with neuro patients a lot. And I will practice shaving with just my left hand, like just in case. And like, I think everyone should do this, like practice shaving your legs, eating and masturbating with your opposite hand. I did not expect the last one. You got to be able to be a little amadextrous. Yeah. No, it is is funny.

Morgan, it says that like so seriously. She's I'm 100 percent. Yeah, she's she's said this for years now. She's like, I, you know, have dealt with like stroke patients. So why not try to make sure I know how to use both hands in case I have a stroke in something you guys. It's just showing you how big of a fucking hypochondriac I am. Yeah.

But I mean, you make a good point unless it's like taking over your life and maybe not, not that great. But like, if you just, you know, once in a while or masturbating with your left hand, I think that's fine. Once in a while, try it out, you know, it might feel even better. It might feel like I've heard guys, guys have actually talked about this. This is not the sex episode, Morgan. Like, Morgan, what are you doing?

But I've heard guys talk about this where it's like, if you want to feel like it's not even you, like, use your opposite hand. Oh, I've never heard that. Yeah. So try it out, ladies and gentlemen, if you haven't already. Yeah. But uh, petty problems, let's dive in. Let's go.

I have a feeling though, like I read one already because I responded to her. Okay. But I have a feeling that just based off of like that one and the titles, like they might sound petty, but they're going to be like anything, but, and I'm sorry I had a time if I sound like a fucking goofball because I've had a lot of caffeine today. It's too much caffeine. And I'm just going to apologize ahead of time.

You sound fine to me. We'll see how this goes. So up first, we have a listener right in. Did they respond to your Instagram post? Is that what we're getting this from? Okay. Yeah. Yes.

I put out an Instagram post being like, has anyone have any like petty problems that have like really impacted their lives? So well, they're labeling it as petty then. So I don't think we should worry too much. Yeah. Fingers crossed. Yeah. So up first, a listener right in, am I the asshole for refusing to pay for my

friend's expensive dress, which I ruined while I was drunk? I feel like I want to say yes, based off that title, right? We'll see. I don't drink alcohol at all. No health reasons. I just choose not to since me drinking has resulted in a lot of very impulsive, very bad decisions in the past. So I haven't had a drop for three years.

My friends know this. They also know the reason. Now one of my childhood friends is getting married and on her bachelorette party, I specifically requested that I only be served virgin cocktails. Nobody objected and my friend said she covered it with our waiters. Turns out she didn't. And she specifically chose drinks where the juice and energy drink would mask the taste of alcohol.

After the fourth round, I realized I'm pretty well buzzed and she fessed up saying she just wanted me to be my old fun self for one night. Sadly, my old fun self decided this was reason enough to be impulsive again and I emptied my red colored drink on her expensive white dress, which is now ruined. Now I'm uninvited from the wedding until I apologize and pay for her dress since I'm always the one saying that, quote, being drunk is never an excuse for your own bad decisions, which is true.

And yes, ruining her dress was a heavy overreaction, but since she took the decision of not getting drunk away from me and out of my hands, I really don't feel this applies in this situation. All of our friends are on her side. Am I the asshole if I don't pay and just skip the wedding? That's so ridiculous. You don't just get your sober friend drunk. I don't, I mean, yes, if I were her,

maybe I would just pay for the dress anyway because I would feel bad. Yeah, it wasn't like the best decision to pour a drink on someone, but like, no, I just can't believe that all of her friends would be on this other person's side. Like what that person did was so wrong. She should be the one apologizing. What that person did was a horrible. That was so awful. What that person did is illegal in many countries.

Oh, really? Yeah. I mean, that would make sense. Putting alcohol in someone's drink unknowingly. Yeah. That's like, that's the same as like, roofing someone. Roofing someone. Yeah. Especially when she said, I have a problem with alcohol.

I don't drink. And I think like. That's reckless. So reckless. And I think the decisiveness between her saying, I just felt like I made bad decisions with alcohol. Like that was her conclusion. She didn't feel like it was like true alcoholism,

which I'm not saying it is at all. Like I don't, I think if you, a lot of people come to this decision too, like I don't like the way alcohol makes me feel. I don't do, you know, the best with alcohol, whatever. So I don't drink. But if she would have like been a true alcoholic, would her friend have acted the same way?

Right. Like disrespected her and her beliefs. It's so disrespectful. And what she wants. Insanely disrespectful. I can't even imagine. I mean, like one of my friends, she was not drinking.

She was sober and I gave her, it was like, I made her a drink. Sparkling soda, like a sparkling lines, lime soda water. And then I put like a little bit of margarita mix. I had no alcohol in it because I was like, Oh, this is like a, it's tastes really good. Virgin margarita. Virgin margarita.

And she was like, are you sure there's not any alcohol in it? Like, and I was like, no, absolutely not. Like I would not do that to you. I would not do that to you. Like I, I promise you. So I just, I, I remember even her asking me, made me feel guilty because I was like, well, was that a bad idea to like offer like a virgin margarita?

Because it's, you know what I mean? Maybe it would trigger something. Like maybe you would just make her, I don't know. But like, so even that, I felt bad in that when it was actively a virgin drink. And I just can't believe that this girl is so, I just don't understand how her focus is on her drink and not the fact that what she did was completely betraying someone.

Yeah. You know, I think it's so fucked up. Like she crossed so many lines and it's like, she went out of her way to get this person drunk and like, oh, I just wanted to be, I just wanted you to be your old self. Yeah, what the hell? That's a, that's mean too. That's a slap in the face.

That's just not fun anymore. I'm not fun to that old. Yeah. So I haven't been drinking for three years and you haven't liked me. Literally. For the last three years. That's reckless.

It's fucking so disrespectful. I think if I was Prado, I would honestly just be like, hey, I'm going to pay for your dress because I just not wanted on my hands. I would just be like, I'm going to pay for your dress like, and you, and I'm going to go my separate ways. Like what you did. No, because then now she,

now her friend, what does her friend matter her for? Now her friend can focus on what she did was so wrong. I would be like, here's your money for your dress. I'm not going to be friends with you anymore because what you did was awful and I'm not going to your wedding. I think paying for the dress. How much was it?

It was $200. Like whatever it is. That's what it was. It was $100. Oh, okay. Yeah. So it was right on my line. Yeah.

It was more than $200. I'd be like, nah. But if it's like $200 or less, like I'd be like just whatever. I'll, I think paying for the dress though is almost like an admission of like you were wrong. Like it's admitting that, yeah, I fucked up. I shouldn't have spilled the thing on you

versus the actual problem is no, you shouldn't have fucking put alcohol in my drink. If she kept like, I think like, oh, if you want to keep bringing this up, let's file a police report. Yeah. Let's file a police report and actually identify the problem

that you got me drunk unknowingly after I specifically said I do not drink and I want virgin cocktails. Yeah. I can fuck pain for that bitch's dress. Yeah. I guess, I guess I kind of saw it a different way. I mean, that makes sense too.

That's okay. Yeah. Too hot takes for a reason. I just saw it differently because I saw it like instead of an admission of guilt, it's more of like, hey, yeah, I ruined your dress. I'll pay for it.

And then you can sit and think about what you did because now you, like right now she has a reason to be like, you screwed me over. Now, if you pay for her dress, she has no reason to be like, you screwed me over. So she's only going to be focused on like, what did I do to make my friend not want to go

to my wedding anymore? Well, I tricked her into getting drunk. Like, you know what I mean? Now she can't just be like, fuck that bitch for ruining my dress. I don't think someone like this, like someone that's willing to do this to their friend. True.

I don't think she'll ever see it. Yeah, fuck this friend. Don't go to the wedding. Move on. See, and that's the thing. If you want to pay for the dress just so like, you end it on good terms, like not good terms,

but you end it on your terms, like keep your side of the street clean. Exactly. And it's like, oh, if you want to pay for the dress just so it's like, here, I paid for your dress, but what you still did was so fucked up, I'm done with you regardless.

Yeah. Then, okay, I could see that, but like me, you wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't waste my money on that fucking terrible, terrible friend. Yeah.

Fuck that. Flip a coin. You could. You could. Bad vibes with that friend. I wouldn't. God, I wouldn't trust her at all. No.

I've been roofied in the past and like, alcohol versus roofing, it's the same concept, like if you're knowingly putting something in someone's drink or like alcohol in someone's drink and they don't want it, but like doing that to someone like fucks them up. How's you gonna ever trust to have another drink with friends over again, like a virgin one,

but like, oh, it's just the trust issues and like roofing in, like getting roofied fucks with you, like can cause lifelong health effects. Yeah. Do you not think she should waste her time being friends with that person anymore? No. Not at all.

Cut her out. Okay. Another listener right in. So when I posted the prompt, I was just like, tell me a petty story, blah, blah, blah. And she goes, my old roommate's boyfriend left a bag of urine on my desk when I went away for the weekend.

I don't understand how that happens. What? What? So it's kind of a long story. I was living with my sorority big for the past year and our friendship turned to shit. Frankly, I realized how toxic and manipulative she was. So I didn't want any part of it anymore.

It was probably sometime in March when I came back to our place one weekend after staying with a friend. I didn't realize that a TJ Maxx shopping bag that I had sitting on my desk had a suspicious yellow liquid in it until hours later. So I put my car keys on top of it. Well, I went to grab them a couple hours later

when I realized they were wet. I checked the ceiling, walls, and desk to see if anything else was wet, but absolutely nothing. I held up the bag and saw it was a yellow liquid and it looked to be more than eight ounces of it. I'm currently in my school's nursing program, so I know what urine looks like and the smell.

It became very clear to me that it was urine after the smell got worse. So I took the bag and put it in the kitchen sink. The smell became even worse, so I had to dispose of it. My dad came down to my apartment two days later and put locks on my door. When I went to move out of the place in June, my dad saw all the damage on my doors

of them trying to break the lock and get into my bedroom. I have more crazy stories if you do an episode on roommates again. What? I want to hear if she confronted him or her. Does she doesn't say? Doesn't say. That's all I got. That's not petty. That's fucking like...

That's malicious. That's so malicious. That kind of reminds me of... I won't say names, but... Well... We have a friend who has a certain ex-rumain. Oh, you know what I was talking about then. She put bleach in people's shampoo.

I don't know why I didn't... Or nair. She put nair in their shampoo. I thought it was bleach. It was either bleach or nair. She put bleach and it's not like they thought maybe she did or they started realizing she admitted to it.

She goes, yeah, I put bleach in that bitch's hair. Or sorry, in her shampoo. I think she like fucked with their food too. I don't know. I don't know. But she was clearly going through some shit because that is so fucked up and dangerous. Like you don't... What?

That is completely... Honestly, if the person got sick and died, that would be murder. Exactly. 100%. It could be attempted murder. A 1 million percent. Like for sure assault.

Bleach is so dangerous. Like you don't just put that in something like washing or nair your mouth or your face or... You know what I mean? That was crazy. And so this to me... So bad.

This obviously isn't as dangerous but that's a malicious thing to do. That's not petty. Petty is making some backhanded comment. Not peeing in a plastic bag and trying to break into your room and terrorize you. I just don't understand.

Like... Is it so Elsa? Like he was marking his territory? Like this was her... Like the sorority big house? I don't get the point of peeing in a bag and leaving it in someone's room. Like what point are you trying to prove?

That's a good point. That is a good point. Are you just like... Does that make you sleep better at night? What type of damage are you trying to cause to this person's psyche? So weird people sometimes are just so weird. I don't get it.

Like this one I'm like... This is beyond... It's petty but it's also like we've said very fucking malicious. This one baffles me. If you've ever left pee somewhere let us know why.

Let's dive into these reddit stories. Moving away from the listener right end. Okay. What? I don't know. I feel like people are going to come for me on my take for this one because it's a horse story

and we all know I'm a horse girl. Am I the asshole for not telling my boyfriend I took out a student loan and now want to buy a horse? Why would she be an asshole? It's her boyfriend. Her money technically too. Yeah.

I, 27 female and my boyfriend 25 male are in medical school and law school respectively. We lived together for two years in one apartment and this year moved to our new city where the cost of living is higher than before. In the old apartment I was an undergrad and he was working as a mechanic. We agreed that I would move in

and pay him what my parents gave me for housing and that seemed like a good situation. This ended up in about a 60-40 split in the apartment. He had already been living there and this was more of a windfall than a detriment to him. When I graduated and was accepted into medical school and he and a law school in the same city we were thrilled that we would be able to continue to live together

so we could build a life. When he asked about my living arrangements and how we would split the new place I told him that I would have significant debt from med school and didn't want to take out anymore. He seemed upset but his scholarship and military status meant he wouldn't have a lot of debt coming out and we would sacrifice in the apartment

and where we lived but he agreed. When I started med school and took out my loans I took additional money out as a nest egg in case I needed it. I did not tell him about the loans. The arrangement ended up that my parents paid my rent the same as before and he paid the rest. Now more along the lines of a 70-30 split with the increases in costs.

Now that the school year is over I still have my nest egg. I want to use it to buy my first horse as I am a professional horse rider for others. This horse is about $10,000 and I have arrangements for low stable fees. The horse's lineage could mean that this would be a great investment long term

as well as achieving a lifelong goal. I told this to my boyfriend and offered him to buy into the investment and now he's very upset with me and wants to talk later. My boyfriend paid the majority of the bills over three years so I wouldn't take out loans for room and board for graduate school. I took out loans without him knowing

and want to buy a horse for them since the school year is over. Asshole. Yeah. Asshole. That's different. Once you start mixing finances like that and when someone's covering for you and then you just go off and do your own thing

that is very clearly manipulative. Yeah, I don't even know the word for it. I don't know if it's manipulative but it's just like you let them kind of cover for you this entire time and he's like... Unknowingly. Yeah. I don't know, that just doesn't sit right with me

and especially if she made this decision without kind of talking to him about it. If she was like, hey, I know that you've done this for me and that for us and I really appreciate everything that's been happening and la la la, whatever. However, this is a lifelong dream

and I hope that you can understand why this is so important to me and kind of like a conversation like that but because she already was like, so I'm getting a horse, do you want to come in on it or not? Hey, do you want to buy it? Yeah. Might be a good investment.

Yeah. And also, it might not be. Depending on the riding you do, it's a jumper and it breaks its leg. Then your boyfriend and you are out your investment. There's one thing I've learned about animals and this, again, not viewed this way by all,

but like horses, like people buy and sell horses. They're not like dogs where you keep the dog the whole entire time or like you're supposed to keep the dog the whole entire time. But horses, like you buy and sell horses. You buy a horse, train it,

use it for what you need. If it's not working out or if it's not competitive enough for you, you typically sell that horse. Like that's how horses work. Some people don't do that. They keep the horses for life. Like I have one pony that I've had since I was five.

He'll die with me, like literally. So there's that. There's always gonna be another horse. Finish fucking medical school. You're gonna be a doctor. You're gonna have this money. Like granted, yeah, you'll have debt, but you'll have this money

and you can do whatever you want with it then. But to put your boyfriend, just because he's not leaving with as much debt as you, to put him in a bad position, how are his finances? You're taking advantage of him to buy a fucking $10,000 horse? If it was a thousand bucks or like two,

sure, buy the horse. Ten grand while you're still in grad school. You don't know what's gonna happen down the road. What if you two break up and then you have to find your own apartment? Yeah, I mean, I think just because of the fact that he was actively covering more of the expenses so that she would not have to take out loans.

And then she turns around and was like... Takes out the fucking loan. Took out the loan to do something selfishly while you supported us or me more than like a 50-50. You know, like that, yeah. That just doesn't sit right. No, it rubs me the wrong way. Did the rest of the internet think so too?

Yeah, top comment. You're the asshole. Your nest egg is just extra debt and you deliberately withheld it from your partner. Who, together with your parents, have been paying your way for years. Spot on, the next one says, nothing needs to be said further here.

And that's the other thing. How does she not, like, sorry, but how does she not think that she's being the asshole? Like, the way she writes it out at the very end, she's like, am I the asshole for it? It's like, aren't you, like, spelling it out for yourself? Clearly, clearly. But that comment is also very interesting

because, like, okay, if you took out an extra 10K in student loans, student loan rates, like, the interest on that shit is high. So, yeah, okay, you're paying 10,000 for this horse, but realistically, by the time you pay off that loan, maybe you paid 30,000 for that fucking horse. Like, because you're paying an interest on it. It's so true.

Like, is it worth it? It's so true. No. Do it when you can afford it. That's so true because she's saying, she's like saying that it makes sense because it's an investment, but it's just like, it's not really an investment

when you have to, yeah, however much she has to end up paying for it because of the interest rates. Yeah. Also, this is probably, by the sounds of it, her first year of medical school, and there's a lot more after that. There's a lot more. There's a lot more after that,

so don't get too comfy yet. Don't get too comfy. Don't get too comfortable. Up next, my 30-male wife, 32-female, gave away my dinosaur toy. My dad,

I don't know if he still does this or not. I don't know if I mentioned this before, but he used to save, like, what was it? I think he broke off his entire big toe toenail, and he saved it. No. And my stepmom was like,

I'm throwing this away. And my dad was like, no, you're not. So he hit it. Oh my God. I might be saying this story wrong, but it was something along those lines. I was younger,

so I forget I should ask him next time I see him, but that was a whole ordeal of, I remember my stepmom was like, your dad needs to get rid of his toenails. Oh my God. That's a little disturbing, but I guess it's not that weird, because parents save their kids' teeth.

But my own father saved his own toenail. Yeah. Why did he do that? Now I'm saying it out loud makes me actually cringe. Dad, why did you do that? Now that I'm hearing it more, I'm like, oh, it wasn't that bad, but now that I hear it a little more,

it's like, okay, a toenail, toenails grow back. They're not teeth where you only get a couple sets. I don't know. Yeah, now I'm really, maybe it was a tooth. No. I feel like there's something I'm missing from this story.

Your dad's a dentist. He comes in contact with teeth enough. I feel like he wouldn't save that that much. I think the toenail, I think you're probably right. Oh, I need to ask him after this, but anyway, sorry. So the dinosaur, toy dinosaur. His wife threw away his toy dinosaur.

Me and my wife have been married for six years. We have known each other for 16-ish years. I have had my toy dinosaur for 29 or 28 years. My grandpa gave it to me when I was a baby. My grandpa has sadly died. Me and my wife have four kids together. I love my toy dinosaur. I've had it for so long.

I have so many memories with it. Everyone I know knows how much this toy dinosaur means to me. I don't remember getting it, but I remember playing with it. I played with my grandparents with this toy dinosaur. I played with my kids with this toy dinosaur. My toy dinosaur isn't in great condition. It's missing its arm and toe. Also, I should have started this story,

like take a shot every time he says toy dinosaur. My wife and I got into an argument because I didn't make food for her because I was tired after taking care of our kids. She got really angry and went to our bedroom and left. I keep my toy dinosaur in my bedroom. It's on the top shelf, so my kids don't take it. When my wife came home, she brought burgers

and had the biggest grin. She said to me, quote, I got rid of that stupid fucking toy dinosaur. I then ran upstairs and saw that it wasn't on the shelf. I looked everywhere in our room because she could have hit it, and I looked in her car. It was nowhere. I started crying a lot, and I went into our bathroom

and cried there for 10 minutes. My wife came and I asked what she did with my dinosaur. She said she gave it to a homeless shelter. My wife told me how it's, quote, it's just a fucking toy dinosaur. Stop crying. I told her to leave because I didn't want to talk to her anymore. She left and I cried in the bathroom for an hour.

Eventually, my eight-year-old knocked on the door because she was hungry. I gave her food and kept crying. This happened a few hours ago, and I've been crying because this toy dinosaur means so much to me. She went to her friend's house and she has been texting me and calling me saying how I'm overreacting. I want to know what I should tell my kids

because I've been crying and they've asked me why I'm crying. I also want to know what I should do about my wife. Do I let her come back home? Do I forgive her? That's so mean. So fucking malicious. That's so fucking mean. So fucked. Again, even with my dad and his toenail,

it's just like that is a stretch. But if someone has sentimental value to anything, anything that isn't harming someone else, you know? Yeah. If my dad were to be displaying it above their bed, that'd be different. But if he keeps it in a little chest or whatever and that's his thing, then who cares?

It's weird. But at the end of the day, if it's something that's a sentimental value to someone, who are you to throw that away? And this sounds like it goes way back for him. Whereas my dad's toenail probably wasn't actually a big deal. It was probably just funny. But this is like...

He's had this thing his whole life. Yeah. And it's from a grandparent who has now passed. So fucking mean. Yeah. What really fucks with me too is the fact that they've known each other for 16 years over half of his life.

And she still did this. What a bitch. That is so mean. I hope that she's lying because that's like fucked up. And even if she was lying, that's still fucked up because she watched him cry for hours. Yeah. And then to lie to him after she saw the reaction.

That's so mean. I guess... I don't know. I think that obviously he could forgive her. But if this is what she does in other aspects of their life, then that's not okay. And if she can't realize why what she did was wrong, that also is a huge red flag.

Big fucking red flag. I think it's really fucked too because he was like... She got mad. And this whole thing is all over the fact that she got mad that I wouldn't make her dinner after I got done taking care of the kids. He sounds like... Abused.

Abused. Yeah. Very... Very manipulated. Very gaslit. Yeah. Just... Well, I just think that no matter what the fight was,

and that's the thing too, is that even if... Even if, let's say, he cheated on her, which is one of the worst betrayals you can do in a committed relationship, it's still malicious to go and take something that is so rooted that he puts so much sentimental value in and throw that away. That is still malicious,

no matter what the argument was. To deliberately hurt him by way. Yeah. It's like... I mean, I don't know. I just think that's so mean because she knew what it meant to him. So it doesn't matter that it's a stupid toy dinosaur

because to him, it's... It's everything. Yeah. I agree. I... When I read the part where he was like, I want to know what I should tell my kids because I've been crying,

and they asked me why I've been crying. Mom's a heartless bitch. Just kidding. No. I have something similar... You can't say that to your kids. No, hold it, no. But I have something similar where it's like,

well, me and your mom are getting into divorce because this would be like relationship ending for me. Like, granted, okay, some people are gonna look at it like, oh, it's just a toy dinosaur. But this is like something he's had forever. It's a sentimental piece from his grandparents. Like, picture...

And I have a stuffed animal from when I was born. Like, I still have Mr. Lambert. He's a little lamb. Like, we have friends that sleep with their stuffed animals from their childhood still. Yeah. And I look at stuff like that. Like, pick the most important thing in your life

and then have someone who is supposed to be your partner and love you unconditionally, support you. Take that thing and ruin it. Well, you know, the worst part for me about this story is actually not the initial act of her throwing it away or giving it to whatever goodwill.

The worst part is that she's like, rolling her eyes and saying, you're overreacting and stop. Like, stop crying, you're overreacting. I just think when you see someone in so much pain that you love, that's crying that is literally hurt and just to completely, like, devalue

how they feel and just make them feel even worse and just like, I don't know. How can you do that? How can you look at someone you love who's crying because of something that was so important to them and just be like, you're overreacting? Like, she's still sticking to her guns. Yeah.

And that's the worst part for me. Like, if she were to go back and be like, oh my God, like, I didn't realize it was that big of a deal. I'm so sorry. Let's try to go back and get it. And like, but no, she's just like, loser. Like, she sounds so mean.

Overreact. She sounds so mean. So cruel. So cruel. Well, top comment. You could start by trying to figure out which shelter she gave it to. If at all, if she gave it to a shelter,

it's possible they haven't tossed it yet and you could get it back. Give them a call and just ask. If it's all been the same day, you may have lots of time to get a hold of the shelter before they inspect it and decide to get rid of it. Get your property and hold your head high, my friend. Add on.

This will help OP keep a calm thinking process and maybe help him feel and control the situation by having the dinosaur back. And a lot of people suggest the same thing, like try to find it. Well, because it's like after that, like you said, you think that this is relationship ending. I think there's still a chance depending on how she acts

and other avenues of their relationship. Cause I don't think if this is just a one situation, like you don't want to like end like a marriage with the kids and everything like that. But like if she does this to him and all other like avenues of their relationship, then obviously that's just not okay. But at the same token, it's like even if he got it back

or even if he didn't, like would you even trust her again? Like it would you even want to tell her if there's something that meant a lot to you because now you don't know if she's going to get mad and throw it away. Like, and that sucks. Like you don't want to have a relationship where you feel like you can't tell someone this means something to you

because they're going to use it against you when they're mad. Yeah, it'd be a malicious bitch. And I think I like, okay, yeah, don't divorce over a toy dinosaur. Like, okay, yeah, the title is petty as fuck. Like my wife threw away my toy dinosaur, but she clearly doesn't respect him. She doesn't value his emotions or how he feels. She's trampling over him on like every fucking aspect.

Yeah. Psychologically damaging him is she going to, is you know, he going to trust again, emotionally damaging him. This is a fuck from all directions. Yeah. Other top comments. I truly doubt she bothered to find its shelter

and that they accepted to use toy in that condition. It's most likely in a dumpster behind the restaurant she picked up food from. Other, one of the other ones, she viciously targeted what would hurt you the most. That's abusive. She needs to find it and bring it back or I'd consider divorce.

And it's got like 10 awards, almost 3,000 of votes. Damn. This is so on point. It doesn't matter if it was a toy or a letter. She thought about what would hurt you the most. So true. Exactly. This was calculated.

And, okay, go back to the story too. Remember she was all smug and smiley. That's literally what the next comment said. Exactly. This was calculated. It's such a red flag that she came home smiling. Yes. Yeah.

Okay. We don't know, we don't know if there's hope for her. Because we're trapped. Yeah. So up next. What's up everybody? I'm Mike Wilson with Any Hour Services. And if you've been thinking about replacing your old water heater,

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No one helps more homeowners than Any Hour Services. Am I the asshole for causing drama during an important football game? Last weekend, I, female 27, ended feeling a wee bit poorly with what turned out to be a appendicitis. We were away for the weekend with my partner, male 39, so I had surgery at a hospital three to four hours away from home. I had a small complication during surgery, so I had to stay until Wednesday, yesterday.

But my partner returned to work on Monday, but he came back to pick me up. The timing was bad because there was an important football game yesterday, and it was really important for my partner to watch it. I am not English, so I don't quite get the importance, but it's a big deal for him and super important. I wanted to make sure he'd see the game. I suggested booking a room near the hospital,

so we wouldn't miss it due to the drive. But he wanted to see the game at a friend's place. He said he'd make it. While we were waiting to get me discharged, he was getting agitated because it was taking so long. He had to wait outside, so he was in the car the whole time because of restrictions at the hospital. After a couple of hours, he sent me a text that he had to leave

or he'd missed the game. I begged him not to leave and reminded I could book a hotel, but he left without me, and luckily made it on time to see the start of the game. He said he'd come pick me up tomorrow instead. The hospital wouldn't let me stay over another night or leave alone. Luckily, one of my friends came to get me in the end. She didn't get to the hospital until late,

and we got back to London around 2 a.m. The whole time I was trying to call and text my partner, but he only said we could talk about it today. The whole evening I was texting and calling my partner. Ever since the moment he left me at the hospital. He only sent me one what's up back that said he'd pick me up later but wanted to see the game. When I got home in the night, he was so angry at me.

He said I was the most selfish asshole for completely ringing and texting him during the game and that I ruined the game for him and embarrassed him in front of his friends. I hate him. He said he cannot even look at me and that I bring so much drama with me, it's humiliating to him.

I feel at a complete loss. Bye. Like, bye. I think I might be the asshole for not understanding the cultural significance of football and asking my boyfriend to do a completely unreasonable drive to pick me up. But on the other hand,

we could have watched the game in a hotel room and I wouldn't have been left alone in a hospital in another country. Am I the asshole? No. No, and you need to fucking run. Literally. A gaslighting bitch.

Oh, my God. It is so concerning to me. Some of... I don't want to say it because say it. Say it. People are going to be mad about this. But I just think it's so concerning that sports are fun and great and awesome.

But when it gets to the point where you are putting that above actual human things, it's so concerning because I'm like, first of all, you don't know these people that are playing the sport. They're like celebrities to him. Yeah, right. They're celebrities. I get that.

But they're not your friends. They don't care about you. And also, people switch around in sports all the time. People get traded. You are literally to a logo, to a brand name. You are the people that you love in the back burner to a logo. And so that's why I'm saying, I know people are going to get mad at me for saying that

because I know sports are very... There's a lot to it. For sure. I don't know. I think it's really awesome to love sports. But when it gets to the detriment of the people that you love, then I just think it's ridiculous. Yeah.

I don't know. I think... You said it really well. He's putting his partner's health and safety, his partner, someone he's supposed to love and care for above he's putting football above it. So it's super, super concerning. And the fact, he drove eight hours.

It was a three to four hour drive away from where they live in London. He drove eight hours round trip for nothing. Like drove there, drove back, left without her. So he'd go catch a fucking football game. Your partner just had major surgery. Like any surgery is major surgery. And she had a complication. Like, oh, it's just your appendix.

Like it's easy, blah, blah, blah. Like, okay, people die from appendix surgery. Any surgery is risky and dangerous. I would like leave him so fast if I was her. That would be the absolute last straw. Like if you... Oh, fucked up. Yeah, that's...

No. And the fact that he calls her selfish? What? You are selfish, sir. Like, yeah. How do you... She's not... She's in the hospital.

Like it's not like she's like... I actually want to watch... I don't know, something else that she really wanted to watch. Because it's not like the Bachelorette. Yeah, and she's like blowing him up and she's like, fuck you. You should be watching this with me. That would be selfish because it's like, no, he likes the Bachelorette. Or he likes his thing more than whatever you're watching, whatever it is.

But it's like, no, she's in the fucking hospital. And she needs somebody to help her leave the hospital. Well, that's the thing about working in the hospital. Like, as an OT, we're a big part of discharge planning. And someone cannot be discharged from a hospital, like an acute care setting like that. You cannot be discharged without a safe discharge plan. Whether that's someone picking you up

or like a medical transport to your home where you're then going to have 24-7 support. Like, you can't be discharged without the proper plan. So, her like being ready to go, like discharge takes some time. The nurse has to process papers. You have to have a bowel movement before you can leave. Like, there's certain steps and boxes you have to, you know, tick. But him just leaving her there.

That whole discharge plan is then fucking thrown out the window. And like, it puts her in a really, really bad and unsafe position. She just had major surgery. I just think it's so crazy how much people will, like, again, like I said, I love that people love sports. Like, I think that playing sports growing up is an amazing thing to do. I think that watching sports and like, and getting into it with all of your friends is really awesome as well.

But fuck this dude. You know, when you, it's just like, I don't know how true this was because it was just an Instagram little like meme. So, you never know. I didn't look it up. But it was basically saying how much domestic abuse increases after the football soccer game with England and Italy. They were posting these and they were saying that domestic abuse increases by X amount of percent after these games.

So, you just see like, you would assume from that. I didn't look into it, like I said. Some people are going home and hurting their significant other because they're upset because of a game that has nothing to do with that. I mean, obviously people bet money. But whatever. Lives are ruined over sports betting. And, you know, alcohol is probably involved

and alcohol increases domestic abuse as well. It's just like, it's just a fucking shit show. And it's not the sports fault. It's just that people need to get like, their priorities straight. Like, get it together, people. I'm blown away. Stop comment. Get out of this relationship now.

Yeah. You are not the asshole. Your partner, however, is a world-class giant asshole. He put a game over you. A game. He wasn't playing in it. He wanted to watch other people play a game, leaving you stranded at a hospital.

And then he had the audacity to be mad at you for interrupting his watching a game. Dump him now. You mean nothing to him. And he has proven that. You don't have a partner. You have a monster. I like that ending.

But she put it very well. And I completely agree with her. I love when you read the comments off and I'm like, yes. Yes. That's exactly what I meant. Go off, sis. Yeah. This comment had like over 150 awards.

Over 45,000 uploads. Like, oh, wow. Yeah. Okay. This was a big one. How long ago was this post, by the way? Six days ago. Okay.

Today's date is July 14th, 2021. It was six days ago. So would that have been the Italy and England game? I don't know. Maybe. I mean, London. She was. Yeah, she'd bring up London.

Yeah. Foody is a serious game over there. Also, the fact that he didn't answer any of her calls, like he literally could have just answered him and like, hey, I'm watching the game. I'm really sorry what I did. I'll call you tomorrow. Or like, I'll see you at home.

Like, granted, he's still fucking terrible person. I'd still be like, The fact he didn't respond to her at all. Ugh. I'm trying to save OP commented at all throughout this. All the comments, she's defending him and she comments a lot. So I'll be sure to share this, share this one. But this one's really fucked up.

My friend who picked me up took a train from London, then a taxi to the hospital. Then we took a taxi together to London because she doesn't drive. This fucker drives had a car ready to go for her. This fucker drives. And he fucking made her take a taxi and fucking her friend a train. I'm sorry, can we please make merch out of that? This fucker drives.

I want to fly to fucking London and fuck this dude up. Do you remember that fist you just made? It's the Arthur fist. No, but do you remember that fucking movie where, Oh God, what one is it? I don't know. But there's a guy and a girl that start hooking up and they go to get revenge on this guy that screwed over their friend.

And he gets out of the elevator and she immediately punches him in the nuts and he goes, Why? And she's like, You know why. And that's what I want to do to this dude. I have no idea what you're talking about, but I will support you. Someone tell me what movie it is. She literally is so like, I'm so sorry, OP, but like, you're defending him in the comments is so bad.

Like, I think the most helpful would be answers from English people or people from countries where football is a big deal. Because I think I may not be culturally insulting to my partner. I get like sports as a culture, like to a lot of people, but insulting. No, your partner left you at a fucking hospital after a major surgery. I don't think you can say anything else. Thank you.

I think he may be a little insensitive, but it's just kind of how he is. One of the reasons he says he likes me so much is because I don't give him drama. No, run. And now he feels like I've broken that trust because I've reacted so badly to this. Even though I knew this game was so important to him. Also, his friends think I am a massive drama queen and that he deserves someone who doesn't give him so much grief. Ew, fuck him, fuck his friends.

They can literally fuck, they can have sex. Bye. Like, if you're friends, like if that, I'm sorry, but like, he deserves someone who doesn't give him so much drama. Exactly, then you deserve your friends. Then you guys can hook up and love each other. Like, no, when you're in a partnership, you take other people's feelings and thoughts and needs and anything into consideration.

He's not doing that. No. He's literally manipulating her to make her think that she's only so cool because she doesn't bring drama. So now she feels like she can't have a voice. So she can't speak up when something's hurting her or bothering her. Yeah. He's like, he's praising her.

He's like forming her to not have any opinion. Like, to not like speak up. That's what he's doing. Yeah. By being like, he's trying to shape her personality. Yes. Yeah. Spot on.

Here, I'm just going to keep reading some OP comments, you guys, because they're just like, my head, I want to bang it against my wall behind me. Like this, like, fuck. He cares in his own way. I was giving him a lot of drama for this while he just wanted to relax and watch a game with his mates. I think he cares about me, but he just isn't one to fuss over people. And this was a really important game for him to see.

He wasn't allowed in the part of the hospital I stayed in because of restrictions. So there was little he could do. He just had to pick me up and come collect me, but it took a long time and he wanted to see the football. I don't think he is an asshole. He just wanted to see the game and I overreacted. He cares for me. He just isn't one of those men who pampers others and he wants a drama-free life,

which is fair. We can't be in a relationship and have zero drama. Like, it just doesn't work. That's how, I mean, you can call it something different. It doesn't need to be called drama. This isn't even drama. But that's what I'm saying. Like, that's what I'm saying.

It's not even drama. It's just like, you can't be in a relationship and not have like sometimes where you kind of like come to an area where you're like... You're going to have tiffs. Yeah, you have tiffs. You don't exactly agree on this or that. So just the fact that she's like, no, no, no, he's really great.

He just wants a drama-free life. It's like, well, I get that. A lot of us want a drama-free life, but however, you also have to be able to be there, be open-minded and hear your partner. And if you think that is drama by listening to your partner's concerns and needs, then you shouldn't be in a relationship and you should be single. And that's fine. There's nothing wrong with that.

You should just be single. You can't make her feel... I get it. I know that I'm being all aggressive and freaking out over this, and I do get it that it was an important game to him and that he was like, why can't you figure out someone else to get to you like you're okay, you're safe. There's always going to be an important game, though.

Yeah. There's like, I get, oh, it's a fucking rivalry game. Derby's Zika. Like, I get it. I really do get it. I love sports. I'm big and stuff like that, like Vikings Packers. I'm fucking there.

I'm invested. But if Justin was like in the hospital and needed me to pick him up, I would do that if I had a fucking game. I would do that if I had a friend's wedding. Like, my partner is what comes first. Like, that's my partner. That's supposed to be who I'm going through life with. There's always going to be another important game.

Okay. Well, actually, that's a good point. So let's switch it, though. What if it was my wedding and you were in it and Justin asked you to pick him up from the hospital? I would really try to time crunch and corny things well. Lauren, let's walk her down the aisle a little bit earlier because then I got a bolt to the hospital.

But I mean... I think the fact that he was already there and then left is what really, really pused me, too. And well, I think the part that bothered me is that she was like, we could have watched it together. She wasn't just like... She was trying to... I'm turning it off.

Like, she was just like... Yeah, she was like trying to accommodate him. I'm so mad. I feel like I still have a lot of caffeine today, too, because I'm kind of like wild and feisty. I know this is probably the feistiest I've ever been. This comment, too. We are not married, but hopefully one day.

I hope the fuck not. I'm sorry, OP. Like, I'm really going at you, but I feel like you've been gaslit a little bit to the point where you're just not seen that you deserve better. Yeah. But I mean, I do... I can see the other side of it.

Like, I do understand if this is something that's so important. Like, if he looked at this the same way that you would look at my wedding day, then it's like, yeah, that is kind of difficult. But I don't think he handled anything well by being like, you're dramatic. You're overreacting. Yeah.

Also, like, football game, wedding, like, in my eyes, they're different. Right, but like, I'm just saying, I'm putting in perspective, like, if that's how he looked at this, you know, if that's how important it was to him, and, you know, like we were saying in the last one, whatever people really put their value,

or like their, like, sentimental value and importance into, it's like... That's their decision. Yeah. So it's like, maybe that really was at that level of like his best friend's wedding. Yeah. So, you know, I can like sympathize a little bit,

but I just don't think that he treated her well by being like, you bring drama into my life, and like, the only reason I like to is because you didn't bring drama. So like, what's going on? Like, stop having an opinion. Which, hey, there is quite a bit of an age gap here, and he probably went for someone younger

that he could manipulate based on this. There's always the chance. Always the chance. Two more comments that really pissed me off. He wasn't angry that I had appendicitis, but I texted him maybe eight times, and that evening I tried to call him even more, as I was really upset.

To be clear, I wasn't angry because I understood it was an important game, but I was sad and crying, and I even left some voicemails, and they made him feel awkward as he listened to some when his friends were there, and they could all hear I was crying. It wasn't fair on him. He would have picked me up just on another time.

And then, she responds so much. You guys, I can't emphasize that enough. So like, I'll post the link on the YouTube for sure. Another one. We have always valued having a drama-free relationship. His ex-wife was really jealous with him, and he felt caged in, and he often tells me how much he values that I don't do that to him.

Now, he says I acted exactly like she did. All he wanted to do was watch a game, and he says it drove me, quote, fucking batshit. Wow, comparing her to the ex. That's low. That's low. Low. Yeah.

Just so, so many. I just can't get over the fact that she really doesn't see the issues and just continues to defend him. And I get being in love and having those blinders on and your partner does something really shitty to you. What I think is probably happening

is that when she first wrote this post, she was feeling so down and so sad, but she also wanted people to be like, no, don't feel bad. It's really an important thing. It's gonna be okay. And then when she got all the answers being like, leave him.

She's just like, wait, no, no, no, no, but he's a really good guy. Yeah. So I almost feel like she was looking for an answer for people to tell her that she was crazy for being hurt. She wanted to hear your overreacting. Yeah, exactly.

And then when she didn't hear, no, you're not overreacting. Then she was like, let me paint more picture. Let me paint more color. She tried to fix it. Yeah. And there was absolutely no fixing this one. This dude sucks.

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Dealer inventory may vary. So, boyfriend is insanely jealous. Deleted my characters and threw my PC in the trash. Advice, 25 female, 25 male. Characters. Like gaming characters. We have been dating for a year. Recently, he lost his job and his brother died due to COVID

and he hasn't been doing too well mentally. I've been playing an MMO a lot and I really love taking the time to customize my characters. I prefer playing as male characters and my boyfriend recently noticed this. Him. Oh, I notice you only make male characters. Me.

Yeah, I like playing as male. It's different. Him. Why do they all look like that though? Why do you customize them to all look like that? Me. I just pick whatever I personally like. Oh, that cut him deep.

Me. I just pick whatever I personally like. Him. Oh, so this is what you like? That's what I was saying. That's going to cut an extremely jealous boyfriend deep. These guys look nothing like me. They look more like your exes than me.

Be honest. You fucking hate how I look. Oh, wow. Of course, I denied this and told him I love him for who he is and how he looks because it's fucking ridiculous. But he just kept going on and on. He even tried to get me to delete all my male characters. I refused because I spent a long time making them.

I got irritated and tired arguing so I left and went back to my mom's house. When I came back, my boyfriend is gone. Also, my computer is gone from my desk. I get a feeling to check outside and loan and behold, it's in the fucking garbage can. Wow. What?

I take my computer out, sanitize it. Okay, it was safe though. Not broken. Okay, thank God. And upon logging into my game, I see all my characters deleted. I'm beyond angry. I spent so much time creating those characters and I feel totally disrespected.

I know he's been going through hard times, but I still find this crazy. I haven't said anything to him yet. How should I approach it? I mean, it's definitely a little crazy. And a little aggressively jealous. So jealous and insecure. This is a fake gaming character.

I'm just trying to think that if Jeff played video games and created characters and every single one that he created was six foot tall, blond, skinny with big boobs, and then I'd be like, wait, why do you keep doing that? I could see myself being like, that's kind of weird because I don't look anything like that and why is that your go-to character that you create? So I could see myself having kind of question marks,

like why are you doing that? But he absolutely took it to another level. Justin does have female characters. He plays Call of Duty and this other game. Those bitches. In ancient Greece. But no, this was not a thought that ever crossed my mind. I was never like, oh, why do you play as female characters?

The female characters sometimes have better weapons. They have more skills. Depending on the game, each character has... In real life, too. Yeah. So I'm just like, I never, this is not a thought that's ever crossed my mind to be jealous of a fucking fictional gaming character.

This character in the game is not going to fuck him. Right. He definitely took it too far. It's not like she's jerking off to these characters. Well, maybe he thinks that she is. True. You know, like who knows what he's thinking. Because maybe he jerks off to his.

Yeah. Exactly. Okay. Okay. That's another... If it's, you know, if that's actually a thing, yeah. I mean, it's Justin. I'm just kidding.

I'm just kidding. I'm not going to confirm. But no, now I'm really curious like why... I don't know. It's just not something that crossed my mind before. Like, I don't know. I used to play like this one online horse game. Of course you did.

Of course I did. It was called like Equiverse. And then there was another one called Horse Land. Like before it turned into a show, it was an online gaming platform where you'd like breed horses, train them, make their characters, blah, blah, blah. Like you've ever played Farm Bill? No. But I get the importance of like investing in your characters because like I was like

an original owner on this Equiverse game. And so like my horse was like super important and worth a lot of fucking money in this fucking game. To have someone just delete your character that you've put so much time and energy and like potentially money in because like sometimes you have to pay for upgrades and whatever. Like that's so terrible. Yeah, that's mean. I think that's what I'm saying.

He took it way too far. Like I could see the initial question mark, especially if they actually have similarities more to her ex than him. I could see him being like, why do they all look like that and it looks like your ex? If that's true. But he took it too far. He took it too far. Way too far.

Top comment. Put in a service ticket with a company that runs the MMO. Tell them your account was compromised and your characters were deleted. They can probably restore everything. Oh. Oh. You meant how should you approach the situation with your boyfriend? Yeah.

Dump his crazy ass. I would. I think and here's where like what he did has different levels to it. Okay. Deleting the characters. He's hurt. He feels threatened. He doesn't feel confident in the way he looks.

He's hurting. Okay. Deleting the characters. Okay. Not the worst. But the bad in the trash can. Throwing her computer in the trash can. Last time I bought a computer, it wasn't cheap.

Yeah. I wonder if he just did that to make a statement. But what if someone would have poured like a liquid in the trash? Like what if someone would have? Wasn't it just her trash can though? And it was like right on top. It sounds like it was outside. So I don't, she doesn't mention where she lives or what, you know, the trash can really

is. Like the shared trash can. Like that's really fucked up. Yeah. I agree. Final note for the video game story, we took a little break and got some more wine, took a, you know, a bathroom break, whatever. We asked Justin about his female characters.

So if you tune in on the YouTube, you'll see a video of Justin responding why he has female characters and me feeling very dumb and silly. Okay. So up next. Would I be petty if I, 21 female gave nothing to my boyfriend, 21 male for his birthday after he gave me nothing for mine? As the title said, my birthday was June 19th and my boyfriend hasn't gotten me a gift yet. At first it was because he quote, hadn't found the right gift.

Now it's about money. I'm not exactly spoiled. A $10 book would have done the trick. A snack. First of all, she's a Gemini. So that's not true. Just kidding. Gone.

A snack, a little card or something. It's not about the gift. It's about the lack of effort to be honest. For sure. Why would a Gemini? Why would a Gemini want a gift? No, but like what, what did you mean by the Gemini comment? I was saying that it's not true.

She wants like something extravagant. Oh. Yeah. I, that's me. That's me as a Pisces. I'm just annoying. Like your love languages for sure. Yes.

Yeah. And so gifts and like quality time. And so like, I just, I just really appreciate presents. I, but then I'm like kind of in the boat with her where it's like, just anything. Like a little thought that counts flowers, flowers in a car. But back to this thing. Now July 20th is going to be his birthday. Would it be petty if I showed up with nothing?

One side of me thinks that I should give him something because I want to, not because I expect something in return, but I don't know. The lack of effort makes me pretty sad. We've been together for four plus years. This has never happened before. Yeah. That hurts. That hurts.

Which I get like, what did he say? Oh, he hasn't found the right gift. Like that was his excuse at first. And then he goes, she goes, now it's about money, which COVID has hit everyone really hard, like my family included. So I get it. I don't have a money to like buy a gift, but you could have made like a homemade card or like something.

But if it is truly about the money and like he's feeling embarrassed about it and something like that, like I get it, but at least just like still do something to just show like an exchange of that you're thinking of them outside of just when they're in front of you. Yeah. You know, cause I think that's what it is. I think that's where the love language is for some reason, like the whole idea of like gifts as a love language almost just seems like, oh, that's materialistic. No, I don't think it is at all.

It's the fact that you are on your own terms thinking about someone. And so you were actively getting something because you're thinking about them when you're not with them. Hit the nail on the head. Yeah. This reminded me of you. I got it for you. It's a little.

As big or small as it is. It's a little succulent. It costs a dollar. Yeah. But like I thought of you when I saw it. Yeah. When I wasn't with you, I was thinking of you. Exactly what it is.

I put in this amount of effort, like any amount, like I put in effort to go and get you this. Yeah. When I wasn't in front of you, I was thinking about you. Yeah. I hit the nail on the head. Yeah. I personally, I would still, I would do a card. I'd be like, happy birthday.

Love you. Like you've been together for years and like fighting pettiness with pettiness. Like it isn't petty if it's truly about money. Like if he's just doing this because he doesn't care for her. It doesn't need to cost money. It doesn't need to cost money. You can literally find a flower outside and like, I think that, like that's what she's saying.

Yeah. She's like, you don't, okay. But her not getting him a gift in like almost retaliation. When is his birthday? July 20th. So almost a month apart. He's the cancer. Again.

No idea. Actually that might be Leo. I'm just figuring it all out. No, I don't think that's Leo. It's cancer still. Leo's later in July because it goes late in August. Oh, you're right. Because my stepmom is a Leo and she's July 25th.

Yeah. Well, Justin's Leo and he's August 20th. Okay. So we still don't know. Someone else will. We'll get corrected. It's fine. Yeah.

So top comment. Just say you thought y'all weren't doing gifts this year. Another one. Although this sounds pretty good as a comeback. I feel as if the response will just cause a lot of issues in the relationship in the long run and probably won't work out. And I agree. Like, yeah, I get like fighting petty with petty.

Okay. That's fine. Maybe you'll win in the short term, but like who? No, no one's winning for the sake of your relationship. Like whatever reason he didn't find something he couldn't afford it. You know, whatever it is, you still care for this person. You've been together for four years. Just get him a card.

What I would honestly do is I would ask him if I, if we could talk for a little bit and just be like, honestly, your birthday's coming up. And my first reaction is that I want to get you a present. And then my second reaction is that I'm kind of bitter that you didn't get me anything, even the smallest thing. I understand the money issues, but that you didn't get me something just to show me that you were thinking about me and that you wanted to make me feel special on my birthday. And so I have this like urge to not get you anything because I'm upset by that.

And I just want to talk through those feelings with you because I don't want to feel like that. I don't want to fight petty with petty. Like I want us to be good. I want us to be happy, but like these are the thoughts going through my head. So I just want to have an open like dialogue with you. Look at you and that open, healthy communication. I love it.

Well, cause if you think about it, if she doesn't get him a gift, what is that you're eating? Yeah. Then it's just like, it's like, okay, does that make your relationship better? No. And if it doesn't make your relationship better, then are you going to be happier? No. So like there's, it's not even like, who is it helping?

You know what I mean? No one wins. Yeah. You, you said it really well there, which this next comment actually says something similar while showing up with nothing is tempting. I'd ask him now point Blake, if he's expecting a birthday present, tell him that you were expecting one, but now don't know how to follow through. He'll either be understanding and make amends or he'll be upset that you're even considering

not getting him a present, which would be amazingly telling either way. He needs to know that for getting your birthday, hurt your feelings. Yeah. And you said, you literally said the same thing. I think it's honestly the spot on response. Like talk to him. I, yeah, you would be petty if you didn't get him something. So, you know, for the sake of your relationship and being an adult in a happy, healthy relationship,

you do need to address it like as, as silly as that might make you feel. And at the end of the day, like those are your feelings and you're entitled to your feelings. And so again, partnership, like you should be able to openly talk to your partner about your feelings. And if for some reason you can't and you feel it's not safe to talk to your partner about your feelings or it won't be received well, that's a red flag. And what helps a lot too is just always asking questions.

So if she went into it being like, why, I know I understand the money, but, you know, it doesn't really have to cost a lot of money or anything to be able to get someone just a little gift to show that you're thinking of something. So I'm just curious, like, why, why didn't you do any of those things? Like, why didn't you get me anything and then see what his response is? Yeah. If he's like, honestly, I just felt so insecure and embarrassed that I couldn't get you what I wanted to get you.

So I just didn't even want to think about it. You know, like then there, then you have like way more like closure on like the, the experience that you had. I agree. And if he's just kind of like, you know, cause I don't give a fuck, bye, then, and then it's like, okay, well, if that's how you're going to respond to me, like maybe we don't have as strong of a relationship as I thought. Yeah.

Yeah. Because at the end of the day, like it is kind of a small issue, but it's, it is like this person said, like it could be very telling. Yeah. And it could be like a bigger reflection on the relationship and their communication. Agreed. Next one. Next one.

You are going to do the circus song. You deviated from it. I don't know. I changed the beat. That's hilarious. Am I the asshole for pretending to be Christian? To pretend to be any type of religion is a really interesting concept to me. So I'm, I'm just curious, you know, here we go.

Hi, Jan from Toyota speaking. Jan, I heard it's a good time to buy a Toyota. Sure is. From now until April 4th, you can shop all your favorites like Corolla, RAV4, Sequoia, and more. Imagine yourself in a new tundra where you stop by the home improvement store and finally build that tree house you promised your daughter. Sarah, when did you hop on the call?

Hi, dad. Mom said you were taking too long on the phone. Toyota, let's go places. See your participating Toyota dealer for details. Dealer inventory may vary. So I'll jump right into it. My parents were loaning me their car while mine's in the shop. Their car has a sticker on the back window that says, Jesus loves.

I'm not Christian, but it's not my car. So c'est la vie. I don't know how to say that. And I'm sorry if I... C'est la vie. There we go. C'est la vie. Well, I was going to the store with my mother and we just got back into the car when someone

knocked on the window. I rolled down the window because I thought I might have dropped something or another. Apparently this elder couple saw it. When I rolled my window down, they started with the usual jargon. God is good. Jesus saves. That kind of stuff. Now, like I said, I'm not a Christian, but I don't want to start arguments about this

kind of stuff. My personal ideology is, you're religious? Good for you. I'm not going to disrespect that unless you disrespect me or my beliefs first. So I just put on a smile, converse with them a bit. It was easy since I was raised in a Christian household, shook their hands with a God bless and left the parking lot. Well, my mother started reaming into me.

I don't want to go into the whole conversation, but to sum it up, she essentially said, quote, if I'm not a man of faith, I shouldn't act like one. It's disrespectful to the faith and you're just lying to them. To say God bless. I kind of understand where she's coming from, but in my eyes, it didn't hurt anyone, right? I mean, what did she expect me to do? Flip them off, say, hail Satan and speed off. Jesus.

I feel like that would have been more disrespectful. I think it's the fact. That's a petty sentence. I just think that might have been a little bit more disrespectful. I don't think he really, it sounds like he just said God bless, but like converse with them for a little bit. I'm sure they were like, oh, like they said, what did they say first, like God bless, like Jesus saves.

Like they kind of went in on it like really deep versus being like nice bumper sticker, because that's how this all started. It was over a bumper sticker. And so they kind of went in and I wouldn't like correct them. Like, oh, I'm not religious. Yeah. I don't think it's a big deal. I don't think it's a big deal at all.

I really don't. Like who is this going to hurt? Her mom. The mom. Yeah. Like, oh, you're lying. So like the mom's really religious then? Yeah.

It's the family. It's the parents car. So it sounds like she's just bitter because she wants her daughter to be more aligned. And so when she sees her daughter doing that, she's just like, well, don't act like that if you're not going to like be on my page. Yeah. Don't you think? Yeah.

They never, they never mentioned what they are. Oh. Like no, like no genders, no ages or anything, but like, yeah, I think you're, you're kind of probably spot on where like my mom is very like, oh, you need to be saved because it's kind of the same boat. Like I grew up in a very like Christian household, but like my dad is Jewish and I feel like I align closer with that. And so I feel like I have a Jewish soul and will like pursue whatever conversion looks

like down the road when I get to it. So I get that. And it's probably, you probably are spot on where the mom is like very offended. Like you shouldn't be lying. And like, if you don't, if you don't believe like you're disrespecting the faith, the mom probably feels like they're making light of it or making fun of it with these people. Yeah. That's probably true.

I, um, I kind of sympathize. I mean, I didn't lie and none of us said, but, um, so I grew up Christian and I'm not Jewish. I think it's an awesome faith. I love that I've learned so much more about Judaism, especially through you and your dad. And they've taken me to temples and it's, it's really cool, um, but I am not Jewish. So when me, Alejandra and our other roommates, Sarah, we moved into our new unit, um, everyone in our neighborhood will not everyone, but there's a lot of you live in a very Jewish neighborhood.

And so very Jewish people in our unit specifically, um, they were, they were so excited. We were moving in and they were like, you girls should come over and have wine with us and like, la, la, la, whatever. And, um, and then they're like, are you girls Jewish? And we, we just all said to each other afterwards, we were like, we obviously didn't lie. We were like, no, but like, we, it was like, we almost, because they were so excited. We just wanted to be like, yeah, but we were like, no. Just every wish.

I wish. I wish. Like I just want to like, you know what I mean? You want to sit in. You want to sit with people that you're talking to that are having a good time to, and when they were so excited, like, oh, come and have wine. Like, are you girls Jewish? Yeah.

So then afterwards when we went, we were like, no, we're not. We went back into our apartment and we were like, did you guys kind of want to just be like, yeah, just say good job as to them on Fridays and yeah, you can make up for it. Yeah. You can, you can come to my Jew activities. Thank you. Uh, yeah. I, I think like sometimes what's that little saying where like, oh, a little white lie.

I never heard anyone like sometimes that's not the case, but in this one, like, you're never going to see them again. Yeah. As a random encounter in a parking lot, you're going to make more of an ass out of yourself if you say, oh, I'm not religious, I'm fucking atheist. Yeah. Like whatever, whatever your religion or what your beliefs are now. Top comment on this one, not the asshole, but I do support the Hail Satan approach.

Oh, wow. Jesus. That's a top comment. What? Yeah. Who found this post? I'm sure they probably just took like all thumbs up it because they thought it was funny. Reddit humor.

Yeah, exactly. It's a little dark. Exactly. I feel like it's humor. Hopefully. Jesus Christ. Well, there is like the church of Satan, like, which is not like Satan, the devil. Like it's.

I've never heard of that. Religion is very, it's a such an interesting concept and to each their own. I don't like that. Truly. I just think of. Sabrina, Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, but like the new Netflix series, I remember you saying a little dark. I remember you saying you won't even watch that because she like talks about Satan and

stuff. No, that's not why I don't watch it. Oh, it's just dark because of Satan though. No, just the overall vibe because of Satan. I didn't think that was why I didn't like it. Well, I don't know. I watched like a few episodes and after you said that to me, it was dark because it was fun to watch during Halloween.

But after you said that to me, then I started getting freaked out every time she would talk about Satan being like her lord or whatever. And I just like, I couldn't finish it. That's not what got to me. I don't know what got to me, but like just weird movies like the Conjuring, like dark feeling movies. I'm just like not into. I don't want to bring that energy into my life.

Yeah. If that makes sense. The next top comment, if I'm not a man of faith, I shouldn't act like one. They were like quoting what he said and they go, Hmm, I think your mother is wrong. You are a man of faith. You have faith that people need to mind their own business and not comment on your bumper sticker. Someone else goes, not to mention having faith in just being a decent human being.

I feel like they shouldn't be reprimanded. I can't even say the word. You got it. I feel like they shouldn't be reprimanded when they were just trying to be nice. That's, yeah, they were just trying to be nice, trying to be decent human beings. They weren't like, Oh yeah, I'll meet up with you at church on Sunday. Yeah. You know, they were just like, God bless.

It was just, it wasn't that big of a deal. The mom is making way too big of a deal of this. There's something else going on with the mama. That's what I'm thinking too. Yeah. Onto the next one. I am at the asshole for shutting off the movie halfway through and making my boyfriend feel bad.

My boyfriend, Wyatt, and I always watch movies together every time we have off days that end up on the same day, especially since the pandemic. And we go back and forth on who picks the movie. But I've noticed he's usually talking through my movie choices, either pointing out plot holes or just talking down about the movie in one way or another. I never act this way when it's his turn to pick the movie. Even if I don't care for it, like the last movie he chose, The Fountain, I was confused until halfway through and then bored the rest of the movie.

But I didn't talk during the movie or constantly dump on it either. And even at the end, when he asked what I thought, I said it was all right, even though I thought the movie wasn't good. It tried to do a bunch of different things all at once and ended up doing nothing. But he seemed really fond of it, so I didn't want to hurt his feelings. But he doesn't seem to have that mindset when it comes to him watching my picks. I've told him to shush and to just watch the movies, but he just sighs loudly and says they're boring.

If I tell him to stop, he gets all huffy and goes totally silent and usually takes his phone out to play a game or scroll the internet, totally ignoring me and the movie. It really hurts my feelings. And yesterday was my turn to choose again, and I picked a movie that really hit me hard as a kid. I bawled when I first watched it and still tear up to this day. And I told him this movie was special to me. But he barely got 10 minutes into it before he started up saying it was boring and childish.

It is a kid's movie, but that doesn't make it boring. I was getting upset and before the big part of the movie even got close, I just couldn't take it anymore. I felt like him acting this way during a super important part would ruin the movie for me, maybe forever. So, I just got up and turned it off. He asked what I was doing and I told him I didn't want to have the movie ruined for me.

So, it was better off if I just turned it off. He said I was being a baby and to turn it back on. I refused and just told him to pick something to watch instead. Then I sat on the couch. He got mad and said if I was going to be dramatic like this, then he didn't want to watch anything with me and got up and went to his room and slammed the door. That's fine. Bye, bitch.

I completely sympathize with her because it's like when you have something like that that's like touching to you, you don't want to taint it by some negative asshole. Your memories of that are so special and sacred. Fuck you. You don't want to the next time you watch this movie, remember how the person you loved was being an asshole about it. So, no, I would turn it off too. Fuck you.

I completely agree. You don't know. Like she said it hit her really hard as a kid. You don't know what she was going through at that time, how this resonates with her, how this has maybe gotten her through tough life events, you don't know. She goes on to say, this happened the other day and he's been giving me the cold shoulder. And when I asked why, he said he wants an apology for making him feel like dirt. Should I apologize?

No. Did I make a huge deal out of just a movie? Am I the asshole? No. Not at all. No. Not at all. Like when someone ruined something that you find enjoyable or special, like I don't understand

why people shit on stuff for no good reason. Maybe it's not for you, but you don't have to shit on it and ruin it for other people. You're just going out of your way to be callous and mean. Yeah. Why? That doesn't make you any better. Like, I don't know, just what the fuck are you trying to do? What are you trying to do?

Yeah, I agree. I just think I completely support her decision. I do not think that it was petty because she was protecting her own. This is a movie that really makes her feel special. That brings back amazing memories that touches her in an amazing way. And now this guy who she loves is bringing it down, tainting it. Her favorite movie. Yeah.

Making it pointing out things that could have been better or that are wrong with it. Making it and just manipulating the whole way that she might view the movie and hopefully anyone can see through that and just be like, well, fuck you, you can have your opinion, but this is mine and I like this movie, but it just still sucks. You don't want to have that memory attached to something that's so special to you. So I don't think it was petty for her to turn the movie off. I think absolutely she did what was right because it was like, he's not enjoying it, he's being annoying about it and not appreciating things that are special to her.

It's not about the action or it's not about the movie or not, it's about the actual respect he's giving her and that just wasn't there. And there's something to be said too about when you like something or watch a certain movie, but then someone points something out. You can't unsee it. You can't unhear it. Yes, exactly. And that's all you're thinking of.

Every single time. Yeah, I didn't have words for that, but yeah. And what you said, I was like, oh my God, yes, this is exactly that because I've had things where it's like, oh, I really like this. I thought this looks cute, blah, blah, blah, and someone pointed out, oh, you look like fucking Blair Waldorf in that headband. I'm like, that's a bad example because I like Blair Waldorf. But one of those things where it's like, they pointed something out and then it ruined it

for you. You can't unsee it. So this was an innocent thing, but it annoyed me. But Jeff, when I was on my way over here, I was planning on returning some stuff. And I tried on these pants that I was really iffy about. And so I wanted to see what his thoughts were because I was super iffy. So I was actually like, what do you think about these pants that I'm FaceTiming in? Those?

No, no, no. And he was like, I love them. They're amazing, whatever. And then I have this shirt from like the same place that I was for sure going to keep because I loved the shirt. And I was like, and I was like, what do you think about the shirt? And one of the questions was like me actually wanted his advice. The other one wanted, I wanted him to validate what I already liked.

Do you know what I mean? You phrased it wrong. You should have been like, I love this shirt. Don't you think it's great? I said something like, isn't the shirt cute? And he goes, yeah, you left it to open ended. Yeah. He goes, yeah.

And then I go, I go, you like it. And he goes, yeah, I go, you love it. And he goes, I like it and like two out of three exactly. And he's like, and I think I, it's like, I gotta be like, I gotta give him this because like, he was honest. Yes. He tries to stay very honest with, or he stays very honest with everything. And so even when it's something where I'm like, why don't you just say you loved it?

Like I'd rather him be honest just in life than, you know, whatever, than do little white lies. So I appreciate that. But at the same time, then after that I was like, well, do I love this shirt? Like maybe this does look weird. It makes you have doubts. I kept looking at it and being like, well, do I want to keep it? And then I'm like, no, I do want to keep it.

And I like it. I should, I have my own opinions, but like because someone I care and love about is looking at this shirt and you don't even mean that I'm like, now I have doubts. And I just, I just think that there is something to be said with like protecting things that you really care about. And like, and being like, if your opinion is so far fetched from what mine is on like a sentimental video, then like, I don't want it because I don't want to change my opinion or see things in it that make me question whatever, whatever.

Yeah. Morgan finally got a bug that she's been trying to get. So yeah. Oh my God. No, I was listening though. I, I think if something is super, super important to you and there's a chance that someone's going to ruin it, maybe like, but that's not fair either. You should be able to share what you're happy and obsessed with and in love with like, it's

not fair. So fuck him. Yeah. His reaction to like, oh, I want you to apologize because you made me feel like dirt. And it's like, she shot the movie off because you were making her feel like dirt. There's a clear miscommunication, but his reaction is kind of a rent flag to me. Yeah, I agree. I agree.

And I think if, okay, so if he did this with all the movies, then it sounds like he's been doing it with all of her choices. No, no, no, but I'm saying with all of movies in general, like if he was just one of those people, yeah, then it's like, okay, that's annoying. Like even if I was her, like with that movie, I would still be like, okay, I want to keep this movie sacred. So if you're going to like have like comments about it, like, please, like, let's watch something else because you're kind of ruining it for me right now.

And I really like this movie, um, but it, it sounds like he's only doing it to her choices. Yeah. So it's like now you're like, now it seems like you're actually like criticizing her specifically by doing that. Um, yeah, especially if he has not one comment about his choice. Exactly. Exactly. So that's why I'm like, I don't know.

It could be like a potential petty like get over moment they can figure it out, but there's also some question marks like, well, who is this guy and what, why is he acting like he's so much better? Yeah. Like only my movie choices are good. Yeah. So the fountain, I'm going to have to look at what the fountain's about. Same.

Top comment, not the asshole, major red flags. I see. And he definitely is the a-hole and owes you the apology. Next one goes, I just love how he throws a temper tantrum about her being too dramatic. You calmly explained he was ruining it for you and in his attempt to tell you how you're over dramatic, he acts like a toddler. So true. Hypocrisy like that makes me laugh and I would have probably done so in front of him.

You won't fix or change anything. Just make yourself tired in the end. And someone goes, he reminds me of the guy that yelled at me for being a drama queen and putting on a little scene for everyone when I talked calmly and he turned red and pounded the table. But you know us women, always full of drama. I saw on TikTok, I think a lot of people have been saying this, so it's probably common, but there's been this trend where they're like, if he tells you that you're too much,

tell him to go find someone that will give him less. I love that. I absolutely love that. Yeah. That's funny. Similar to the saying like, if you can't handle me at my blah, you don't deserve me at my best or whatever. Other comment that I really like, not the asshole.

I dated someone like this one time and you know what ended up happening? We ended up only watching the movies he wanted and it wasn't just with movies. The dude never ever wanted to do anything. He didn't want to do 100%. And if you are with a partner, you have to compromise sometimes. So basically it just ended up me always doing whatever he wanted, whether it was picking a restaurant to eat or going on a walk. So glad that relationship ending.

Not saying you have to do the same, but this sounds like a personality flaw in your boyfriend that might be difficult, if not impossible to change. And at any rate, it's not your job to change him. Yeah. She nailed that one because that's exactly what I was saying. If this could be just a petty situation where it's just blah, blah, blah, whatever random movie stuff. But this sounds like it's built into his personality.

Yes. By the way that, I don't know, but who knows? I know. It'd be interesting to hear how it comes out to play in other situations. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well.

Is that it? Are we done? That's over. I do have one more. Okay. But it might get a little deep divey, so I think we send it over to a deep dive on the Patreon. Okay.

As far as the regular episode goes, we are done. We did it. We did it. I'm so glad you're back. I'm back. We're here. We're united at the desk. You should know something though.

I am leaving for a week. What the fuck? On Wednesday. Why did you do that to me? I know. I was so excited. We were in the same place. I know.

Why? I don't know. Where are you going? Arizona? Yeah. Well, in Minnesota too, actually. Oh my God. I'm just kidding.

But thanks for joining us, you guys, on this episode of Two Hot Takes. We hope these problems, they weren't petty. They were worse than petty. Agreed. We might have to change the whole title. No, because I think from the very start, that's what I said. A lot of times, petty occurrences, like petty, yeah, you know what I mean? It actually, it's an iceberg.

A lot of them were deal breakers. Yeah. Oh, I kind of like that though, petty problems. Petty problems. They're an iceberg. They're an iceberg. There's the title. There's the title.

Until next time. Until next time. Bye, guys. Bye. The thought of my sons growing up without me inspired me to quit smoking. I talked to my doctors and then I threw away all my cigarettes, ashtrays, and lighters. I started exercising instead of smoking. Staying away from alcohol when I was first quitting was key.

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