Two In The Think Tank - 02 - "The Clause"

Episode Date: June 7, 2013

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Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. All right. Nailed it. Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum and uh here we are and uh you know for those who don't know this is the podcast it's an the idea generation podcast for myself alistair trombley birchall and you myself andy james matthews james matthews um and when we say for those who don't know we're

including ourselves in that because we didn't realise until just that moment. Yeah, we're not fully aware. We've been kept in the dark. Yeah, and... Like fungi. We've got vitamin D deficiencies. We do. I have rickets. Yeah? Yeah.

Is that a type of bed bug? Yeah. It's the type of bed bug where you have poor bone development and you can't get out of bed. Oh, I hear that's going around

at the moment. Yeah. Everyone in the comedy festivals got it. Wow. Yeah. Did you see Tommy Daslow?

No. Just a huge bed bug. Oh, he's a bed bug. Yeah. I mean, I think I don't know why you just chose one person like that. It was an example.

Oh, yeah. Well, okay, but... It does sound like I was singling him out, though, doesn't it? Yeah. Like, the way that I singled him out. Yeah. That really seems like... It makes it seem like I'm singling him out.

Yeah, and that's fine. It's strange how singling people out sometimes has the effect. Of feeling like someone's being singled out. Yeah. Yeah. You're really quiet. Am I? Yeah. like someone's being singled out. Yeah. Yeah. You're really quiet. Am I? Yeah.

Maybe it's because I talk quiet. You want to turn me up? Yeah. Keep talking. Oh, yeah. I'm going to keep talking because I just want to single out some person. And, oh, there you go. Oh, my God. It's because I think I'm just funnier when I'm speaking quieter.

And now there you go. Oh, my God. It's because I think I'm just funnier when I'm speaking quieter. Okay, so basically the whole podcast idea is that we're just going to be recording and we're trying to come up with five sketch ideas. Five ideas. And we're just going to keep recording for as long as it takes. To get five. We're not going to edit anything out, even that bit before, where we're just going to keep recording for as long as it takes. To get five. We're not going to edit anything out, even that bit before,

when we were just adjusting the levels. If you were listening to the show, hoping that we were going to edit that bit out, we're not going to. So you have to sit through it. Unfortunately. Yeah, as you are probably by this time aware. You ever watching a TV show?

I hope they don't put this scene in when it goes to air, when they broadcast it. I hope this ends up on the cutting room floor and at the same time you're like, probably won't though.

Yeah, well maybe they can have, after the director's cut, they can have the audience's cut. The audience cut. Which just, they edit out all the bits where you're distracted or you wander out of the room. In a way, that is the audience cut which which just um they edit out you know all the bits where you sort of you're distracted or you wander out of the room in a way that is the audience cut yeah yeah that's

how you do it i mean it'd be it'd be a great feature to have on blu-ray that you can just highlight scenes that you don't want to see the next time you watch it yeah yeah the um the audience cut would would just sometimes you're watching something and then just randomly it flicks to something else. Or the picture on the screen sort of pans around and you see the window next to the television. So you still have to just sit through the amount of time. Yes. They don't just remove it. No, no, no.

But they give you the experience of watching the DVD. Yeah. don't just remove it no no no they but they give you the experience of watching the dvd yeah okay they give you the experience of like cutting it up yourself by just looking out the window yeah yeah but you don't actually have to look away yeah from the television so it's very much you know and sometimes i'll just play the sounds of like kids uh you know in the next room being really annoying and you can yell out? Yeah. Yeah. Is it got voice recognition and it's going to like respond? No.

Okay. No, it doesn't have that. It's not the full experience. It's not the full experience because there's limitations to the technology, but they're doing the best that they can. It doesn't have to be in the future. Yeah. We're going to be able to yell at our TV and it will respond to it. Here's a funny tweet that I did the other day.

Okay. I think it's funny. Yeah. I tweeted, I think that's almost a sketch what we were just describing, by the way. Yeah, okay. I don't know if we want to count that as one.

Let's count that as a tentative first sketch idea. Yeah, yeah. Okay, I'll write it down. It's number one is... Audience cut. Audience cut. Yeah. Cool. And then you could sort of just, you could find your favorite audience members and watch their cuts of DVDs. Actually, that's not all that unrealistic, because that's the sort of thing that's happening now and i think that might even exist yeah like on the internet yeah i think i think people do do like recuts of movies that they like and stuff and so you can watch other people's cuts of a movie and be like oh

yeah you know this guy gary from south bank yeah did an amazing cut of the emperor's last dance. Toothbrush. Toothbrush. Yeah. I mean, that's, well, cool. I mean, it's almost. It's almost not a sketch anymore now. It's almost just a thing.

It's almost like we predicted the present. Yeah. Yeah. That's a gift. that's cool so what was your tweet oh my tweet was um oh if god watches everything i hope he doesn't have a nielsen box it's pretty funny isn't it oh yeah okay that's the thing where you get the star ratings yeah or the ratings defines the ratings of like television programs yeah but in a way it'd be great if he did oh yeah yeah and if his vote was worth more than everyone's

i don't know it probably would be yeah yeah it depends the nielsen system nielsen box system probably doesn't work like that it doesn't have one setting for humans and one setting for omnipotent beings if god watches watches everything, he does watch all television. Yeah. Like even the really terrible television. Yeah. And infomercials. Yeah.

Infomercials. He's watching Ladette to Lady. He's watching... Ladette? Ladette to Lady. Oh, Ladette to Lady. Yeah. Is that a show where they...

It does just sound like a combination of noises, doesn't it? Ladette to Lady. And I think that's show where they... It does just sound like a combination of noises, doesn't it? Ladder to Lady. And I think that's actually what the TV show is. Just a combination of noises, sounds. Yeah. I mean, I think, is that where they take somebody who's like low class and sort of just a shit person, and then they make them into a good quality civilized person who a rich person could have sex with. Yeah.

Yeah. Someone that a rich person could have sex with. That kind of high quality person that a rich person... Because you know when you're a rich person and your mom's like i want you to find somebody that you can have sex with and i'll be okay with it and they go well i found this lady who's you know three weeks ago she was just scum right but then she went on television and embarrassed herself yeah and now she's worthy of now she's worthy of... Now she's worthy. My love.

Of receiving my love. Yeah. Yeah. My rich love. My rich, prosperous love. I don't know if love can be prosperous. Yeah, it can. That's really great.

Yeah. I feel good about that. Yeah, I do know that. I do know that feeling. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So that's how that started as a question, right?

Yeah. What was the question? The question was, do you know that feeling when you're a rich person? Oh, yeah. You go to your mum. I desperately wanted that answer. Yeah. Yeah.

It's one of those questions that has to be answered. Yeah. Can't go unanswered. What's the opposite of a rhetorical question? Like, you know, a rhetorical question is one of those ones that you don be answered. Yeah. Can't go unanswered. What's the opposite of a rhetorical question? Like, you know, a rhetorical question is one of those ones that you don't have to answer. I think the opposite of a rhetorical question is just a question. Yeah, but you don't have to answer a question. That's true.

Yeah. As, as Tony Abbott established. Yeah. Well, I mean, because, you know, politicians, they can avoid questions like that. They just pretend that they're rhetorical. But maybe, oh, I thought that question was rhetorical. Oh, sorry, I that. They just pretend that they're rhetorical. But maybe... Oh, I thought that question was rhetorical. Oh, sorry, I'm sorry.

I thought that was a rhetorical question. Well, so can you tell us why you're cutting funding to TAFE? Are you going to answer the question? Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were just, you know, asking the universe. Oh, no, no'm sorry. I thought you were just asking the universe. Oh, no, no, no. I was asking you. So I guess my question is, can you explain to us why you're cutting funding to TAFE?

Well, ever since I've been in leadership, I've really enjoyed the snacks that come with... The snacks of power. Yeah, the snacks of power. Great. But I think the person would just keep thinking it was a rhetorical question. Yeah, that's true. They wouldn't just answer it about snacks. Yeah.

Okay. So you think I got this sketch wrong? Was I not really getting the idea? Maybe. Maybe it's possible. But what if there was a type of question? Because you know how there's some questions, like a regular question you can just not answer.

How are you feeling? Yeah. I'm cutting funding to tape because I hate poor people. No, you're still not getting it, Alistair. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay. Have, okay. Yeah. Okay. Have another snack.

Yeah. Mmm, biscotti. That's sort of like a rich person's snack, right? It is. It's such a shit thing, but they charge you a lot for them. Anyway. Do the people use them to stir their coffee? Is that what biscotti's about?

Do rich people like being ripped off? I think they do. Yeah. I think it's a sign of wealth. Yeah. Look how... Look how much I got ripped off for this meal. Look at the profit to overheads ratio that this company is making.

It's ridiculous. But also when they go out and buy rich person food. Yeah. Go to a really expensive restaurant. I mean, they get hugely ripped off. Yeah. And that's like a status symbol. Yeah.

Oh man, I went out last night and I got so ripped off. I got so, like, didn't spend my money wisely. Have you been to Vieux-Demond? Oh my God, the meals there are such a rip-off. It's divine. It's the best. But I guess they don't refer to that, do they? They talk about how they just went to that place.

But they also, they talk about how they just went to that place and then they just are happy. Yeah, that's true. They don't actually talk about how much they got ripped off no i mean they should start mentioning it they should i mean because it would be more human yeah like ah you know i didn't really enjoy it because i couldn't take my mind off of how much money i was spending but But maybe that's the thing. Like, it's an acquired taste, like caviar, right? I don't enjoy caviar, but, you know, I don't eat it a lot. So maybe, like, you know, and I would have it, and I would think, oh, this is kind of gross, right?

That's sort of also how I feel about getting ripped off, right? But as you get used to getting ripped off, maybe you're like, no, but I can really appreciate, like, the rich, you know, the details in the way that i was ripped off yeah you know you get to you just need exposure to it yeah like like and so like eventually imagine you could you could create restaurants that are that are so exclusive and rich that you could just make it a horrible experience and people would just like, you're getting ripped off. The staff is so rude.

They like spit at you. Not just in your food, but in your mouth. Yeah, in your mouth. And it's just the most horrible experience. But because it's so, like you're paying so much for it and you're just used to, you know, it's just the name that you're paying for. And then the horrible experience just becomes so pleasant. Like, you know how alcohol tastes horrible when you first start. Well, apparently that's the same thing with everything.

Suffering is just an acquired taste. For rich people? For rich people, yeah. If we're going to talk about suffering and how being exposed to suffering makes you like it more, maybe rich people are not the right people to choose as being regularly exposed. I think maybe the thing is that you have to pay for it, though,

because then you've got an incentive. Because otherwise you don't appreciate it. Exactly. You take it for granted. Yeah. That's why poor and starving people in third world countries don't appreciate it. Exactly. You take it for granted. Yeah. That's why poor and starving people in third world countries don't appreciate suffering. They take it for granted. Yeah.

It's like a free comedy show. They don't put in enough to enjoy the experience. Whereas rich people, because they've paid for the experience, they're more likely to enjoy it. Yeah. They've exploited people. I'm going to open a restaurant called Suffering. Yeah. You can come.

And it's going to be horrible. It's going to be so awful, but you're going to love it. Yeah. Because it's the best. All right. That's a sketch. Open a restaurant. It's called the Suffer Club.

Okay. Did you get that? You did it That's a reference to the Suffer Club Which is an expensive restaurant in the city Now I actually don't know if it is that expensive But it's definitely the most expensive place I've ever wasted my money So like I got a little bit of a taste From my point of view

Of what that's like The Suffer Club The Suffer Club Yeah I did it I did it with a pun from my point of view, of what that's like. The Suffer Club. The Suffer Club, yeah. I did it. I did it with a pun. Yeah, and it's great, Andy, because you're really good at wrapping up things.

Yeah. If ever I have a present to give someone, I'll get you to make a pun about that present just to summarize it. Yeah, and it won't cover the present. Oh, no. and it won't it won't cover the present no no but it will wrap it up yeah it will encompass it it will fully be with a pun yeah sure yeah well that's great you know it's great that it's great that rich people have it really great. I talk about rich people like they're a race of people. Yeah.

Like they're like a race of people that I have no problem hating on. Yeah. Like I don't mind discriminating against rich people. Because I think I've said this before, you know, in my life. But I've become so poor. and it's of my own fault. It's my own doing. Al is really poor. Yeah.

But where I've started getting like junkie instincts where I'm like, I see somebody in a suit and I just want to spit on them. I saw a junkie in the city the other day using a garbage bin. Just like putting his... And that shouldn't be that amazing, right? But he had a Snickers wrapper or something. And he went out of his way, walked all the way across the footpath or whatever, to put the wrapper in the bin. And I was like, that's interesting in a way, isn't it?

Because I guess the ground is kind of like his house. And you wouldn't just... I mean, he's still a human, I guess. Yeah, no, totally. But then there was part of my brain that was like, oh, that's surprising. And that was the surprising thing that I found surprising. Well, you know, junkies, you know, there, there's some great people that are junkies. Yeah. Yeah. And you may have just witnessed the Gandhi of junkies. Well, but I think part of it was what was thinking, like, we treat junkies like shit a lot of the time, right? Like, we ignore them when they're talking to us. We call them junkies.

We call them junkies on our podcasts. But, like, I can't remember what I was going to say. Yeah, but we treat them like shit, but then they're, like, they still are. I can't remember what I was going to say. Yeah, but we treat them like shit, but then they're like, they still are... You would expect that the payback for that was that they wouldn't respect out. Yeah, but I imagine there'd be a lot of low self-esteem that would come with knowing that you're a junkie. Because you get dismissed by everybody. Yeah.

And that to a certain extent, you're probably in a situation you don't really want to be in. And so you got to believe in the society that you're in in order to, you know, to just have the hope that you can climb back up to where people value you. Yeah, that would be a hard thing to hold on to though. But no, it wouldn't be that hard

because that's that's why that's the kind of thing that would just motivate you to take that snickers wrapper and put it in a bin do the right thing put it in a bin yeah in my high school it said do the right thing and then someone scribbled out put it in the bin and they just said hit ricky with a bin and i I think it was Ricky Woods. Yeah. Who was a guy I went to high school with. Who I'm pretty sure someone at some point did hit with a bin.

I'm sure, at least once. Yeah. Okay, so if junkies are discriminated against, when will they rise up and have equal rights? When will we get the first junkie pope? First junkie president. First junkie president. Junkie president. Junkie president.

Okay. Well, because it's... First junkie in space. Yeah. Well, at the moment, there are no laws. So first, it would have to be laws. No, I don't know that there would have to be laws. I think there just have to be like...

Oh, sorry, laws. Stopping us from discriminating against junkies. Because I haven't really ever discriminated against a junkie during business hours or during while I was at work. It's more a recreational activity. It's more of like something you do in your free time. Because it's like a lot of dismissing. So it's a lot of kind of... It doesn't take a lot of time.

You can just do it while you're in between like places you know you're on transport and so yeah you know just walk into the shops things like that uh so it would have to be like a law that you can't discriminate against people uh working at your company just because they were junkie just because they're constantly off their face on heroin yeah Yeah, and addicted and stealing. Yeah. I don't know. Is this mean to junkies? I mean, I feel like it would be very easy to laugh at a sketch that was like, junkie president.

Yeah. Okay? And he's a junkie, but he's also the president. Do you understand the concept? I think I'm getting it. I feel like that would be funny, but at the same time it would be nice if we're trying to say something about junkies overcoming.

Yeah. Discrimination that we were just laughing at them for being junkies. Yeah, it's like, look, you guys aren't deserving of any respect, but we put you in a position of high office. Yeah. I think we're better than a sketch like that.

Yeah? Okay, what if we had a sketch called Junkie Sketchwriters? Yeah. And then we don't put them in high office, we just put them in our position. Which is pretty low. Yeah. I'm getting junkie instincts, so I can't.

That's true. I'm not that far. Okay, what if we had a sketch called Sketchwriter Junkie? Yeah. Where... He's like, okay, so how about a regular person? Okay, what if we had a sketch called Sketch Writer Junkie? Yeah. He's like, okay, so how about like a regular person? Okay, like, you know, let's say a regular person makes it up as a president.

Yeah. Is that... Or is that praising them too much? They dismiss us. Yeah. All the time. And, i don't know look i feel like junkies would have better ideas than that one yeah okay like because i mean like having like a lot of great writers been junkies i feel like you got a lot of time to think but that's like yeah that's an amazing

thing that you can be a functioning drug addict and you know produce great work yeah but you're like i imagine being on drugs all the time it would be almost like meditating a lot because you're just you're spending a lot of time in your head just thinking and having ideas and going on journeys yeah you know so certainly they could be pretty wise they're just not they just don't have great managerial skills because they don't care yeah but then that amazing thing that you would then take all that stuff that you've been thinking about and sit down and write for hours and hours and hours yeah and produce amazing work i think one of the things that

stops me from becoming a junkie is just the amount of money it would take i can't afford to be a junkie really and then and then and just i'm i'm really like i just i don't feel like stealing from people in order to get that money that i don't have and so i think it's really just like a social awkwardness that kind of stops me from being a junkie. Yeah. This is the thing, okay, that I want to do a sketch with. Yeah. Is the idea of that the, I don't know, like something to do with the fact that the easiest things to steal are the least valuable.

And how disappointing that is. Yeah. That like if things that were really easy to steal were more valuable, it would be great. Like, leaves, right, are really easy to steal. That's true. Like, I could steal so many leaves right now. I could go out and I could just go on a leaf stealing, just a binge. None of the rangers would probably even know. No.

I mean... But then I'd have all these leaves and it would be really difficult to sell them because they're really not very valuable at all. I know, but maybe you could do some value adding. Value adding to the leaves. To the leaves. And then you could start making a pretty penny.

But, yeah. Oh, a pretty penny. You know what I realize is quite difficult to steal? Shoes. Because of my poverty thing that I've been talking about. You know what I realize is quite difficult to steal? Shoes. Because of my poverty thing that I've been talking about, I've thought about how can I get stuff without having to pay for it. And I thought, okay, well... Okay, well, there's stealing.

There's stealing. And then there's other ways that I haven't thought of yet. And I was thinking, shoes shoes are ridiculously priced and i thought well but it's difficult to steal shoes because they've already they've thought about this like like because they keep one shoe out right and so it's not necessarily going to be the right size shoe yeah right so but it's also only a left or a right shoe yeah it's only a one yeah left or right and so you have to find the right size, and then you have to be able to get out the back

to find the other shoe or, you know, a box of shoes with the thing. So it's almost like, it's almost worth just, like, robbing a bank because it's almost like a heist. You have to, like, distract the store owner and try on shoes. Yeah, the amount of planning. Yeah yeah you may as well rob a bank i mean people will probably follow you less if like try to track there are fewer armed guards at shoe stores yeah well maybe it's just worth stealing a shoe or maybe you could go this is what you'd have to do you have to go two separate shoe stores. Yeah. And then just hope. Or you'd have to go many shoe stores.

I think it's always the left shoe that they put out. Like, I think they're in cahoots. In case of that thing, like, they're all working together. Maybe. Ah. That sounds crazy that they figured that out. It's almost like it should be illegal, that kind of collusion. Yeah.

Between colluding to screw over no other type of company like retail will work that hard to stop people from stealing things they just accept it well there's nowhere else you can do that there's nothing else that comes in pairs like that where essentially without one shoe like a shoe an individual shoe is perfectly functional, but without the other shoe, it's as good as useless. Yeah. Like, you can wear odd socks, you cannot wear odd shoes. Yeah. That's not...

Yeah, it might just throw your whole alignment out. Yeah. There's something about that, like things in pairs, like that. Like, I don't know, what else could you do that with you know it's not like you have a box of 12 eggs yeah they just take one of the eggs out and oh and and like there's no point stealing the 11 eggs yeah because one of the eggs is missing no that's true yeah we keep the we keep the 12th egg out the back um what size do you want? Extra large? Egg. Okay. Is that free range?

All right. I'll go see if we have it in stock. They go out the back. They've got one more egg. Here you go. Yeah. Here you go. Here's your two-pack.

Yeah. Yeah. No, they can't do that. Okay, wait. What's something else they could do it with? Two. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

Everything else that we think of as being a pair of pants, you can't have half the pants out the back unless the pants themselves are just jammed in a door. And you can only see one side of the pants. Yeah, or they just have the pants in pieces and then they have to thread it up for you. Without this thread, it's useless. You've just got pieces of pants and you're not going to put it together.

We have a sweatshop backstage. It's a hard sell. Everything's a stage for me now. Backstage. Everything's a performance. This shoe shop, it's just a performance. It's just a show about a shoe shop and at the end you can buy merch.

That's actually the prompts from the show. Yeah. That's funny. Yeah. Is it like the, yeah, the guy working in the shoe shop is just acting as a guy working in the shoe shop. Yeah. And I've got some merch if you want at the end.

We're selling shoes up the back by the door. It would really help us out, you know, if you've enjoyed the shoe shop show. The shoe shop show. Yeah. You could have a whole village like that. You could just like, you go, come to the village where we're pretending that it's a village. And people are like living their lives and then working in stores. But they're not actual people.

They're just actors. Yeah. Well, you know, Alistair said... Alistair, what? Shakespeare? Jesus. I'd just like to say that, in my mind, you and Shakespeare are more or less interchangeable. Yeah. Shakespeare said all the world's a stage.

Yeah. So maybe everything is just merch. Yeah, everything is just merch. And all possessions are merch. Yeah, everything is just merch. And all possessions are merch. Yeah. For the performers. I like the implication that we're saying that actors aren't people. It's just, no, no, no, they're not real people.

They're just actors. They're actors. Pretending to be people. Yeah. And I don't think it would be that far from the truth that a lot of the people in retail jobs are actors anyway. Yeah. But, okay, I do like the idea of like... Yeah.

Because, you know, like an old... It's like, you know, you go to those old-timey towns and then everybody's an actor pretending to be somebody from old times. Yeah. And they do have little shops. And, like, you go to Sovereign Hill, you can buy lollies from the lolly shop where an actor pretending to be somebody from old times. Yeah. And they do have little shops. And, like, you go to Sovereign Hill, you can buy lollies from the lolly shop, where an actor is acting as an oldie-timey shoe shop, sweet shop. But, yeah, instead of that, it's just the actor is pretending to be a present-day shoe shop. And he, like, just pretends to know stuff about shoes

and pretends to convince you to buy the shoe. Yeah, yeah. And if it's a convincing enough performance, you might think, oh, that was great. I'm going to support this guy by buying some of his shoe merchandise. Yeah, all right. I don't know how that's a sketch.

I mean, it's funny though. Yeah, look, I think it's... You just have to have a narrator explaining it. He's got a lot of work to do. Yeah. Look, it's a... What's that called

in the film when you're just explaining what's happening? Exposition. Oh, yeah. So, this is going to be heavy in exposition. But I'm going to write it down.

I am... Is there something funny about the idea of... Oh, no, it's just too obvious. Like the idea of, like, you know, have an acting group. And they're all actors, and they're doing a successful Broadway production, but they don't really want to be actors. They all want to work as waiters.

And they're just acting... So that they can pay. Yeah. Or maybe that there's just, like, one guy who's just a really... He's a really good actor. Like, in a theatre troupe, there's one guy in there who's a really good actor

who just wants to be a waiter. And he's always talking about, you know. Yeah, well, I feel like I've met people like that in life where they're like really good at something. And they're like, oh, I just want to get out of this. I wish I could just go do something else. Yeah, so they'd be really good at some great creative thing. Yeah. Yeah, but they want to get out.

They feel trapped. Yeah, I just look... I wish I could just have a regular life where I'm just... There are some comedians like that, aren't there? Yeah. Well, Ted's a bit like that. Although he doesn't want to... He doesn't want to go into, like, you know...

He doesn't want to be a waiter. He doesn't want to be a cobbler or something like that. He just wants to... He just wants to do film writing. But imagine just quitting stuff all the time just because you're good. No, I'm good. I just got to quit. Yeah.

I got to stop doing this. I'm too good. My life isn't challenging. This is a sketch that I thought of ages ago. Outside the actor's studio. No, I like that. And it was just somebody being interviewed. And then you can just see on the building it the actor's studio no i like that and it was just somebody being interviewed and then you can just see on the building it says actor studio well i think maybe like what it is it's like whoever the guy who's supposed to be doing the interview the tv show just concerns

him showing up at the actor's studio and he doesn't have the key and for like 20 minutes he just tries to get in through the window and calls the body corporate. They can't let him in. They can't get anyone around there. And yeah. I think that sounds great. It's just one man's struggle to enter a building. I mean, he could just be anybody.

He could just be the janitor who's forgot his keys. Yeah, that's true. He could be one of the actors. You can have a full series, obviously. Yeah, so it's a different person every week, a different actor maybe every week is stuck outside, can't get in. Yeah, he can't. There's not a very good phone reception inside,

so people are trying to call and go like, oh, they're going to let me in. Yeah, and that thing happens where the security guard wanders up to the door and sees you and gives you some sort of signal yeah and then walks off again and you just never see him again you know what what was that supposed to mean what was the signal yeah yeah is he going to get somebody i don't know i think someone will be out soon and then end of episode and it's just the saddest thing, because there's never any resolution. All he's got is the outside of a building and a film crew.

Yeah, and it's like a full half-hour episode. Yeah. All right, let's sketch. Actors. Studio. You see, I'm writing the sketch ideas down because I'd like them to be recorded in some way

if only there was a way of just keeping track of these things that we're saying here and so I have to write it down on a piece of paper that is going to be very easily discardable yeah a piece of paper that is going to be very easily discardable. Yeah. Yeah.

Just scraps of paper. Scraps of paper that I'm hopefully going to lose. It's my system. Yeah. That's how I do things. It's the scraps of paper system. Yeah. S-O-S-S.

S-O-P-S. S-O-P-S. S-O-P-S. I think that's dangerous having an acronym that has SOS in it. I mean, I got the acronym wrong. It doesn't actually have SOS in it. But yeah, you're right. Sons of salamanders, damn it.

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See app for details. I was talking to some people the other day, right? You know Mayday, that emergency call that ships would put out? Mayday, Mayday, right? You know that comes the other day, right? You know May Day? That, like, emergency call that ships would put out? May Day, May Day. Right? You know that comes from the French, right? May Day, which is help me. Oh, okay.

May Day. May Day. Yeah. Right. Was it you I was talking to about this? No. The people I was talking to were like, no, it's like May Day, as in, like, the day. May Day.

Like, the day of May? Well, May Day is like a day in May Day, as in like the day. May Day. Like the day of May? Well, May Day is like a day in May where something happens. There used to be like a carnival or something on May Day. And these people were really insistent. The carnival is coming. Help. Help. That the call that ships officially use when they're in trouble at sea is just like, Christmas, Christmas, Easter Sunday, Easter Sunday. Circus is here one day in May.

The carnies are coming. Yeah. So that was weird. Yeah. But I'm not even sure with the French, mais des, whether it's conjugated properly, like, mais des would be, like, helps me. Helps me. Like, or, viens, mais des.

Like, I don't know. Yeah, by itself, it doesn't really mean much. Oh. Well, look, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it is the day and night. No, it is still, like, I don't know. Yeah, by itself, it doesn't really mean much. Oh. Well, look, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it is Aidee. No, it is still like help me, but... Aidee moi. Aidee moi.

Yeah. Is more like... Help me. Yeah. Is it... Aidee, is that like reflexive? Is that like I help myself? No, yeah.

I think it's more like... That would be je m'aide. It's more like helping me. Helping me. Helping me. Helping me. I'm helping myself. Yeah. That would be

Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je m'aide. See, then you can't. No, that doesn't work. Yeah. Je m'aide. M'aide.

And then how would the English say that? Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je m'aide. Je made. G-Madey. G-Madey. G-Madey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey. Jemadey Cricket. But you know, you're thinking, let's get some editing in on this. No, there won't be any editing. I think the listener appreciates... The rawness.

Yeah. Remember we were talking earlier about suffering? Yeah. Yeah. Well, if we're going to charge... We're going to charge a lot of money... For this. ...and get really rich listeners who will really enjoy this podcast.

Yeah, they're going to... Oh, did you feel those drawn-out pauses at the end? Yeah. Where they were really flailing for ideas? When they just had one idea left. You know, they just needed one more idea and they were probably hitting about 30 minutes on their podcast. And they were like, all right.

It was just going nowhere. And they just started saying, Gemity. Gemity, Gemity. And then Alistair said, Gemity Cricket. And he felt really embarrassed within himself that he'd made some Pinocchio reference that wasn't very good. No. No, it wasn't very good.

Oh, how about this for a sketch idea? All right. It's Pinocchio. Oh. But instead of his nose growing and getting really long. Yeah. His

lips. Oh, that would be so much more disturbing. He just had these long, just flapping, dangling lips. Big old flappity lips. Flappity dangly. Or if they were stiff, then the more you lied, the more you'd look like a duck. But then eventually you'd stop looking like a duck and start looking like a... Swordfish.

Yeah, like a swordfish. But do swordfish have two swords? Is it a bottom sword and a top sword? Is it just like... Good question. No, it's not a good question. I knew the answer. Oh.

Yeah. Do you know the answer? Yeah, they've just got a bottom jaw and then they've got a, like... A spike. Yeah, the spike that's attached to their muzzle. That seems like it would be really difficult. Like, if we had, like, a long spike. Hmm.

Like, well, I guess we... But the thing is, we eat with our hands. We don't have to, like, shove our face into our food. Yeah. To eat it. But it would be difficult to lick plates oh my god so difficult to lick a plate and that would affect al's way of life pretty significantly yeah well i don't know if if i couldn't lick plates i'm not sure if i would want to continue

yeah but then again if i was underwater my knowledge of plates and what i was missing out on it's like being poor. Living underwater is like being poor. You don't know how great things are when you're rich. Okay, so you don't feel like you're missing out. Hang on, so we don't know that we're missing out on living underwater? No, no, no. If I was a swordfish and I couldn't lick plates, right?

Yep. I wouldn't care because I don't know about plates and how good it is to lick the last bit of sauce, which has got all the flavor on it. Yep. I wouldn't know about that kind of thing. All I would know is impaling smaller creatures on my nose. I bet they don't actually even do that, though,

because that's no use to them. Like, having a smaller creature impaled on their nose does not help them in any way. I have a feeling, like, if you impale something, it tends to move less quickly away from you. But it's stuck on the end of your nose. I know, but I have a feeling that they can probably wriggle shit off. Like, they've got strong bodies.

So you genuinely think that that's for, like, spiking... Well, I think they can use it for whatever they want. Yeah. I don't think it necessarily has a purpose. I think it's helped them

in some way. Yeah. Because or else it would just be... It's really multifunctional. Or else it would just be getting in the way. Or, I mean, they could be swimming

behind something and they could just be tapping it to the side and like they could be juggling it like a hockey puck. Yeah. Like from side to side like that. Getting it to go where they want and then maybe into the mouth of a friend. Just you know. They're like the soccer players

slash hockey players of the sea. Snooker. Yeah. And they could play it under ice water which is very similar. There could be a game of hockey going on on top of the sea. Snooker. Yeah. And they could play it under ice water, which is very similar. There could be a game of hockey going on on top of a lake, because that's where swordfish are found. On lakes.

In lakes. On lakes. Swordfish wouldn't have a clue what to do on a lake. Because you'd have to have a drill bit. This is so far from being a sketch. You think? I don't think we've been further.

Okay. I think maybe, like, on the Earth, you know, you can only be a certain distance from home, something like 12,000 kilometers from home. It's the most you can ever be. It doesn't even seem worth it. I think at the moment we're 12,000 kilometers away from a sketch. Okay. Like, in mind meters.

Yeah. Well, swordfish, they're just not funny. They're just very practical animals. And I'm sure that some have impaled things on their nose. Yeah. And that they've successfully gotten them off and then eaten them. Yeah. But just that idea of eating things just raw. just raw, like, you know, because that's what

a fish would have to do. Like, if you're a fish... That's what everything has to do that isn't a person. I know, but at least, like, if you're, like, a, you know, like some giant cat of some sort, you can, like, you can smash things with your paw and they'll lay there for a while. You can stand above it. You can take your time because they're dead there for a while. You can stand above it. You can take your time because they're dead, right? Right.

Or you bite their neck and then they're dead. Yeah. And you can just stand above it. You can take your time. But if you're a fish, like a swordfish, you've got to kill something and then it'll just float away. Yeah. So you've got to just like... They'll sink down.

Yeah. So you've just got to put these things that are just, like, they'd kind of still be warm in their body, and you'd be in cold water. So that'd be kind of nice, I guess. A lot of fish stuff, like, things in the ocean do, like, they'll, like, swallow things whole and alive. Yeah.

So, like, you'll get a fish, and you'll just go... And then it's alive in your stomach and you just dissolve it. Maybe that's just more because of how horrible it would feel to have it in your mouth. Like, you couldn't love it. Like, would you learn to love that feeling of just having, like, a wriggling, living, like, half creature, something you've bitten in half? I think if you'd paid enough money for that experience, you'd learn to love it. But fish just don't pay. I think fish just eat quickly

because it's just such a horrible experience for them. And then they'd swallow heaps of salt water and stuff, which I don't know if you've ever swallowed salt water, but it's awful. Oh, especially heaps of salt water. Heaps is the worst quantity of salt water to consume. Alright, swordfish are a fucking dead end, turns out. Turns out.

Yeah. They're a comedic dead end. They're the cul-de-sac of comedy. It's like getting an idea and then impaling it on this spike you've got at the end of your nose and then not being able to get it off. What about... Comedy is, at the moment, it's stuck on the end of our nose.

Yeah. What about the guy who invented the cul-de-sac? Do you think it took somebody to invent it? Like, what if this road just doesn't go anywhere or i think i think maybe the way that happened okay they said they would just kept going and going with this road they didn't know how to stop well i know i think somebody just built a like they were building a road right as they do and they just build them to keep going forever yeah i think that's that's everybody who starts a road their goal is that this road's

going to be the one that goes forever. Yeah. No one's going to stop this road. Yeah. But then, while they went home for the night, some dude built a house at the end of the road. Oh, no. Just like where they're going. Probably a Seventh-day Adventist. Why? I think they build their churches all in one day.

Oh. Well, that's an amazing thing to know. Let's say no. Let's not go with no. My dad told me. Now, I don't know if that counts as knowledge. Do they have really simple churches? Yeah, they're just like a block, like a house, like just a square. Like a bungalow? Maybe like a bungalow. Oh, Seventh-day Adventists. Adventists meeting down the bungalow for worship. Meeting down the bungalow church. Sounds very tropical. Yeah.

They have a coconut. Now that I think about it, that doesn't make any sense that they would build an entire house in one day. I mean, you've got to wait for concrete to set and stuff. Well, maybe they don't bother with... I mean, it's a big day. Oh, it's a big day. They definitely get up early. There's no lying in.

Yeah. When should we meet? Oh, 12.30. See, I just, you know... I'm going to be up all night watching The Passion of the Cross back to back. Back to back with my wife. Yeah, because we don't...

We don't look at each other. We just sit back to back. Yeah. And we watch The Passion of the Cross simultaneously on two different television screens. Yeah, eye contact between us means that we want to procreate. Yeah. We have 74 children, which we need if we want to build a church in one day yeah starting at 12 especially the more kids you have the later you can get up

when you're building a church yeah that's the idea with procreation it's just the more children you have now the less work you have to do later on. It's a lot of startup, like a lot of work, laying the groundwork. Yeah. It's like laying that foundation takes a lot of time. Yeah. Unless you got 73 children already to just help you raising the babies and things like that. Yeah.

Well, that would definitely be a thing. Like, the more children you have, the easier it becomes. It's like economies of scale. Once you get to, like, 70 or 80 kids, it's like you barely have to do anything at all. You just fart them out. Yeah, just fart them out of your dick. So, this Seventh Day Adventist So this guy was building this road Yeah

Seventh Day Adventist While he went to bed And the guy was back at 1pm To keep working on his road Yeah Because he was also a Seventh Day Adventist Oh no Well then he should have built the whole road in one day.

I know, but... He was a bad one. That's not what they do. That's not what they do with roads. That's not part of their philosophy. They build roads in two days. Yeah. Has your dad ever told you that?

He's never filled me in on how they go about building roads. Yeah. Well, it's probably because there's nothing special about the way they build roads. No one ever sat you down and said, Son, Seventh-day Adventists, There's nothing special about the way they build roads Alright, I'll talk to you next week See you later Good catching up

So then the guy gets there at 1pm And there's like half a house set up And there's just so many children Running around Working as laborers and there's like half a house set up and it's just so many children running around like working as as laborers so many children so many children just like fanning this slab yeah that you know because they've fanning the slab fanning the slab you know making it dry you know getting some of that fanning the slab sounds like a great euphemism i don't know what it could possibly be for but like it's got the it's got that um two syllable one syllable kind of structure yeah oh yeah fanning the slab yeah that's that's definitely like the the structure for euphemisms

for like sexual acts isn't it yeah it's like you, flicking the bean is the da-da-da-da. The da-da-da-da-da format of euphemisms. Da-da-da-da. Flicking the bean, yeah, that's good. So they're fanning the slab, and it's just drying so quickly. And meanwhile, someone's just put the steeple on the bungalow. someone's just put the steeple on the bungalow. And this guy's like, wait, this is my road to everywhere. Everywhere, infinity.

Yeah, it was going to connect up with all other roads. I mean, I know you can still get into it through one end, but I was really hoping of having that rabbit hole thing where you can get out through two ends you know rabbit burrows rabbit bungalows they always got two exits because if a ferret goes in one hole they want to have a way out yeah ferrets kill rabbits anyway and so then there's like these two seventh day adventists have a fist fight. And that's how they invented the cul-de-sac.

Oh, God. Yeah, you're right. Editing would be great, wouldn't it? Yeah. But we're not doing that. Yeah. So do you think that's a sketch? How the cul-de-sac was invented?

Oh, you fucking Seventh Day Adventists. Look, I'm writing that down. Convention. There's definitely something funny about the idea of Seventh Day Adventists. Just, you turn around and they've built something where you were doing something else. Like, they're constantly, like, you can't take this they're like they're like something else that does that like where they will build like something will suddenly be in your way like the opposite of batman so like when you turn around batman's gone yeah and then when you turn around again there's like a there's like a church

in front of your computer. Ah! Batman the Seventh Day Adventist. He disappears on one side and then he builds a church

on the other. Seventh Day Adventist and like the opposite of Batman. Yeah, you turn around again, Batman's back. Turn around again, The church is dressed as Batman And then you turn around again Batman's gone Then you turn around again The church is gone I think we need to I think we need to

I think we need to get the exposition guy back in again to explain this sketch. Because... Look, the important thing about this idea generation thing is that we don't technically have to make the sketches. We can, and other people can, if they give us credit. I think that's a fun idea. That, like, if anybody liked any of the sketch ideas that we came up with and, like, wanted to shoot them or something.

Yeah, just... Just do it. Just do it, and then tag us in the Twitter promoting of the thing. Yeah. Just go, hey, this is a... We made your seventh day advent to Batman. Batman. Hold us up, sketch.

It cost us seven million dollars and took five years. Yeah. I lost my wife. The saddest comedy sketch maker ever He's just pouring so much money into our sketches Just the passion that he puts into it It's just appalling Now

We have our five sketches Do you want to wrap it up Or do you want to make it a dozen five Oh no sorry A baker's five A baker's five but it's five i would feel better if there was another good like realistic making sketch okay like can be made that can be made like like you know something simple like in a in a restaurant

or a doctor's you you know, something. So, okay. So that there's some connection to reality. So somebody, some doctor's diagnosing someone in a restaurant. And he says, get up on this table. And he goes, here's your problem. You got piles of pancakes on your ass, under your ass. So stupid.

This is the thing that I was thinking about. I was thinking about hemorrhoids yeah and how like that that would be like the biz the the businessman version of getting your period right because i think hemorrhoids is like you bleed from your ass is it i think i don't know yeah right and and like in my mind it's like something that only like old businessmen get because they sit around in business meetings so so much yeah so there'd be a time in a businessman's life where he sort of he goes through like he gets his period for the first time yeah and it'd be like being a teenage girl needs girl and like they'd have to businessmen are all like when they stand up after a business meeting they always have to ask

the businessman behind them to check their pants to make sure that they haven't got their hemorrhoids but then you'd get young occasionally like like a younger person would have it

and they'd have to talk to their mum and they'd be like I'm not ready to be a businessman I don't feel like a businessman and the mum would be like you're becoming a businessman yeah or maybe they'd have to talk to their

businessman dad yeah yeah he's like look you know sometimes it happens earlier early on and it's great you know it's a good thing for you you know like it's it's a beautiful thing in a way like you're becoming a businessman you know soon uh You know, you're not a man anymore. You're a businessman. Yeah, soon enough you're going to be, you know, talking about overheads and... Yeah. And... Your body's going to change, you know. You're going to...

You're going to have... You start losing your hair and... Yeah, that 40-year-old gut. Yeah. But you're going to get that now. You're going to... Junkies are going to spit that now. You're going to... Junkies are going to spit on you. Alistair will as well.

Alistair too. At least we'll contemplate it. I mean, that's kind of a sketch. That's kind of a sketch. Look, I think we've got something else in us. Yeah, all right. All right. Yeah, it's a bit too gross.

Like if I was looking for something That could really be filmed And I still think Businessmen with blood on their pants Because the amount The amount of hatred I've seen Come from ladies About guys doing period jokes

And I still feel that That would be Almost a period joke And it's fine And I don't care about I don't care that they're getting upset But I feel like If we're gonna do a period joke

It's gotta be strong And I think that do a period joke, it's got to be strong. I think that looks strong. You think it's pretty strong? All right. No, don't write it down. No, no, no. I'm going to write it down. No, no, no.

Yeah, yeah. All right. Hemorrhoids. What if we did the next? A businessman's period and coming of businessman... Age. Coming of middle age. Age. Business manage. Of middle...

Hey, what if we made this a baker's baker's dozen? Yeah, yeah, I think we should. It'll be a... No, we'll we made this a baker's baker's dozen? Yeah, yeah, I think we should. It'll be a... No, we'll just make it a baker's six. Oh, okay. No, yeah, sorry. A baker's baker's five. But it's a...

A baker's half dozen. A baker's half dozen. Bakers just add one to everything, right? Yeah. What if we make this a baker's two? Three. Three. Baker's Two's a couple

and a baker's couple is a crowd. Two's company. Three's a crowd. Hmm. What if do you think if you were like let's say somebody, like, there's a baker trying to buy a house.

And he's like, what's the price on this place? It says $121,000. And he goes, make it $122,000 and you got a deal. Do they just add one to everything? Look, I got six fingers on each hand. Do they just add one to everything? Yeah. Look. I got six fingers on each hand. Eleven fingers.

I'm just two men. I am just two men, for God's sake. I can't get this all done. All this baking. Yeah, I can't get all this baking plus one done. Plus one baking. Plus one baking done in just two nights for tomorrow. Plus one day.

Yeah. Yeah. That's not a sketch, though. No, I don't think so. No. It's an idea, though. It's definitely an idea. It's fun.

Yeah. Baker's adding one to things. But then we'd have to have the narrator go, in this sketch, this sketch is about how bakers just add one to everything. Add one to everything. Like, you could do it,

like, you could set it up. Like, you'd have the baker doing something in his baking shop, making 12 of something, adding one. Baking shops had a name. Something more simple, you know? Like, Bakehouse. Bakeatorium. Bakemporium.

Yeah. Bakemporium Yeah Bake-emporium-atorium Bake Baking area? That's pretty good It's got a nice aesthetic to it Bake-area Bake-area

Bake-area? A bake-area I think that's pretty much as efficient as we're going to get Yeah, I can't see how you could cut that down. Yeah. Because, I mean, what, if you just, just Korea? Korea? No.

No. That's not going to work. That's not going to work. Because people are going to think you sell curry. Yeah. Korea. And that's probably what curry houses are already called. Yeah, probably.

Okay. What about a guy who just, just for some reason, he doesn't have feet, he just has claws? Like an escape clause? Like a Santa Claus? Yeah He doesn't have feet He just has He has all these

Legal documents For feet And hands They call them The claws They call him the Claws. Yeah. Because what happened was he... He met a genie and he wished for the claws of an eagle. Yeah.

Because he's fucking insane. Because he's a dangerous lunatic. This is what happens when a lunatic finds a genie bottle. I mean, we're the ones searching the beaches for loose change. And just things of any value. Just a madman on the beach finds a genie bottle. And then he wishes for the claws of an eagle. But then it turns out to be these legal documents.

The claws of a legal? Of a legal. He wishes for eagle claws. And somebody thought he wished for legal claws. Because the genie's hard of hearing. The claws of a legal. The Claws of Illegal The next hour We watch this poor guy These stapled together documents

This pile of messy Because he's at the beach They're all soggy And it's so tragic. It's awful. And he just has on his feet and hands, like flippers, like paper flippers. Vanilla folders. Which, and he doesn't even understand the language on there.

It's just so dense. And if he wants to understand it, he has to get money in order to just get a legal to read it to him and just explain to him who he is. I think that's our seventh sketch. That's our baker's half dozen. Man has claws for feet and hands. feet and hands, but because... Lunatic. You haven't mentioned that he's a lunatic. He wished for... Eagle claws.

Eagle claws. Claws. From a genie. Who is hard of hearing. Wait, no. From a genie. Because he's a lunatic. I mean, the genie could also just be a bastard.

Eagle's claws. Because he's a lunatic. And... Just combing the beach. The genie... Gave him... Legal... Claws. Legal documents.

Claws. Legal documents. And he is now forever known as the Claws. The Claws. Oh. Oh But he goes around And he settles legal battles Because he's got the documentation Legal disputes

He's got the documentation But each episode Because it's a series He has He has to find out How he can make the documents Readable again And so in some episodes He has to find out how he can make the documents readable again. And so in some episodes he has to dry it out.

In some episodes he has to go to paper restorers, restore ancient documents. Yeah, so any confrontation that he gets into, he can always get out of it on a technicality. On a technicality. Because there's always a clause. He's always got the... And he's got a subclause.

He's got a sidekick called the subclause. And his enemy is Red Tape Man, who's always wrapping up his documentation in this red tape. And he can't get into the manila folders. And also his enemy is Rising Damp. And... He can't get into the manila folders. And then... And also his enemy is Rising Damp, and his other enemy is called the Silverfish. You say Rising Damp? Yeah.

And the Silverfish. The Silverfish. That's the first episode that he has to battle against that. And then, for some reason, he always has an appendix for that. I don't know. Wait. Is that a thing in legal documents? An appendix?

An appendix, I'm sure it is. Okay, cool. And then one of the guys, one of his enemies would say, it's time for your appendectomy. And he would try and cut out the appendix or something. Cut out all the things that are the documentation proving justifications in his clause.

So I think this episode has fizzled out nicely now. Yeah. I like that about our episodes. Yeah, look. About our episodes. This is our second. And I want to thank you all for listening to this. Yeah.

This will be $50. Yeah, it'll be $50. And trust me, you'll enjoy it more. This will be $50. Yeah, it'll be $50. And trust me, you'll enjoy it more. And just DM, tweet me, or send me a private message or something like that on Facebook or on Twitter. It's at AlistairTB, A-L-A-S-D-A-I-R, T-B. What if, like...

I'll tell you how to get, send me the money. What if, okay. People have a way of, like, after an experience, after something has happened, you know, like, say you pay for something, people will justify it to themselves afterwards. Like, even if the thing turned out to be a disaster or they didn't enjoy it, they'll justify it to themselves, because they have to justify the fact that they spent this money, right?

So we might start a service where whatever happens if you're in a bad situation after the bad situation you just call us up you just pay us some money like you just pay us however much money you need yeah so that you can start to justify that thing to yourself yeah i think it's a good service yeah i'll be the we'll be we'll be the recipients of your money. Yeah. So at least I gave some money to these people. And then you can start the justification process and the healing. And the healing. Yeah.

There you go. So great. Thanks a lot. Thanks a lot. I'm Andy. I'm Alistair. See you later.