Two In The Think Tank - 119 - "SPOILER DEPRIVATION TANK"

Episode Date: February 20, 2018

Andy and Al will be bringing the Sci Fi Sketch Experience to Melbourne Comedy Festival from 28 March to 8 April - get tickets HEREPhantom, Pod, Directionless, Argument Valet, Evolving Response, Kitchen EcosystemYou can support the pod by chipping in to our patreon here (thank you!)Two in the Think Tank is a part of the Planet Broadcasting family You can find us on twitter at @twointankAndy Matthews: @stupidoldandyAlasdair Tremblay-Birchall: @alasdairtbAnd you can find us on the Facebook right hereA critical overload of thanks to George Matthews for producing this episode. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi, I am Kendra Adachi and I host the Lazy Genius Podcast. A Lazy Genius principle is to decide once. And I have done that by deciding that Olive and June is my go-to brand for ad home mayonnaise. I don't like to waste time and the Olive and June Manny system has everything you need and nothing you don't, all with gorgeous polishes that don't ship. Visit Olive and June.com slash perfect Manny 20 for 20% off your first Olive and June system. That's olive and June.com slash perfect Manny 20 for 20% off your first Olive and June system. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planet broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mites.

I do that part of my God. I was just talking past the mic. I talked towards the mic. Past the mic. Bob was just talking past the mic. Bob was the mic that passed the mic. Bob was the mic that passed the mic. Oh yeah. Well, welcome to Two in the Think Tank, the podcast where we come up with five sketch ideas. I'm Andy. And I am Alice to George William, probably virtual and thank you for inserting our words

where they deserve to be heard in your head in your head in the in the nog in the nog hole in the nog hole a nog log a nog log. Yeah is when you You say something really stupid The idea of a nog-glog is itself a no-glog. It's what it's a self. What is it? There is a word for words that are examples of themselves. I can't think of any, apart from no-glog right now. No-glog? Yeah.

Anyway. What about onomatopoeia? No, that's not one. No. No, those are words that sound like the... I know, I was an attempted humor. But I appreciate you man-splaining Onomatopoeia to me. I didn't actually get to man-splain, Alistair, because you man-terrupted me. I did man-terrupt. Of course.

Good. Well, it's because I was, I was very man-der-standing this, that we were fucking around more man-king around. Look. Yeah. Elastair, oh no, I shouldn't bring you some. Before the podcast.

Oh my God. No, you don't want to talk about that? Okay, I... No, you can go. Well, I mean, this is horrendous. So I apologize to anybody who decided to choose this podcast to show to anybody. Yeah. Perhaps I have a problem.

Mom, Dad, I've got a new favorite podcast. Sit down, take a big glass of water. I'm about to reveal to you the things that I value and that define me as a person. Alright, hit play, skip 4.30 seconds. Let's go. Alright, well I did a shit that didn't smell like it came from me. And... And Andy likened it to when people have a limb that they don't recognize as their own and want to have it cut off and it was very similar in how I wanted to. Yeah, or maybe a mother who knows that feels like their child was swapped in the hospital.

Yeah. Or as a... I felt like my ship was swapped in the toilet in the bowl in the bowl or Is it is it possible? Tell me if I'm wrong here that your Inus is a portal To somebody else's in us. That's a possibility

Yeah, but that that just happened in a kind of freaky Friday way last night. That rather than- Did you put in a haunted butt plug last night? No. But there could have been some lightning somewhere that swapped rectums with between me and possibly my father. Wow. And so now I'm going to go to his job. Yes.

Okay. And go to the toilet there. And then he's going to go where I work and use the bathrooms there so that nobody can tell the difference. Our colleagues. So, so if this, I mean, I don't know how you would ever feel good about yourself having made this as a sketch. But is there a sketch in somebody who, much like your experiences now, is convinced that their shit isn't theirs, right? And I guess goes to a doctor or something

takes the shit with them in a jar, tries to convince the doctor takes the shit with the minnagear tries to get the doctor takes a shit with them like they both shit into a jar. That's right. Yes. Let me walk you through this. One one doctor, one patient, one specimen jar. It's the new version of two girls, one cup. Because I mean, the world needs more references to two girls, one cup. That's a contemporary thing that people should be. Two people, one jar, specimen jar.

They go and I don't know, they're trying, they start a public campaign to like, work out what's happened. Yeah. Maybe get Facebook attention somehow behind them. So what like, this is sort of along the lines of the mother who thinks that their child has been swapped or something. Yeah, but what like, and they just take a photo of their shit and say this is in line.

Yeah, but it came out of my body and can anyone can you share this around so that we can find who owns these? Yeah, and I guess maybe they'd be photos of Look the inside of the rain. The inside of the raindrops. The inside of the raindrops? Like could this have come from there? No, but I don't think that this is what... I don't think this is the inside of my own anus. Oh, wow.

So maybe that's the conclusion that after further inspection, they think that the inside of their own anus has disappeared. So it has changed, it's swapped. So they've had some kind of butt swap. Yeah. With the... And how do we get to the bottom of this? Like how do we resolve this?

What has actually happened? Maybe a doctor says, did you maybe change your diet a little bit? And you go, oh yeah, I did start eating a lot more ramen. Well, then that's probably it, they leave, right? And then a strange person in like a, you know, black suit, with maybe, let's say, no face. Well, but some of that. Stimmed out from behind the door.

Yeah. And hands the doctor a briefcase full of money and They say thank you for your cooperation How do they say it with no face? Well, we hear the sound Like it appears just in our mind I know I don't know how we achieve that for the viewing audience. Yeah, no, but it's like the they create it could be like a it's like they create. It could be like a,

it's like it's coming from everywhere. But the camera shot is on their face. Don't give a vocal operation. It'd be a cool effect as well though. Like they don't say anything because they don't have a mouth. They just get out a little dictaphone and they put it down on the table and they press play and the tape wears around it says, thank you for your cooperation. And then they press stop and they take the dictaphone and they put it back in their pocket and they walk away.

That's real spooky. It's spooky, isn't it? Yeah, no, look, Andy, this is now a sketch. Yeah. This is now even maybe a sci-fi sketch. Yeah. Yeah. This is now even maybe a sci-fi sketch. Yeah. Experience. That could be in the upcoming two-in-the-think tank show

at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Andy Matthews and Alistair, Trombley Berger. Andy, the Andy Matthews and Alistair Trombley virtual sci-fi sketch comedy experience. That's right. But with no comedy, I always put comedy in there. No, you always put comedy. And there might be comedy in the show. It was not comedy in the title. That's right. But with no comedy, I always put comedy in there. No, you always put comedy. And there might be comedy in the show, it was not comedy in the title. That's right. It's a really dry title. We're playing what they call a straight bat in terms of the title.

Mm-hmm. This is going to be the straightest bat. Mm-hmm. You've ever seen. But, um, back down the pitch. I think the, for the first time, we now have a link that sells tickets. There is a link. We'll put it in the description of the show below. If anybody wants to come, it's like in between the 25th of March. 28th, I think. 28th of March and the 8th of April. Of April.

Oh, I could be wrong, but I've been doing a bit of admin for the show recently. Yeah. And that, those are the dates that stuck in my mind. So look, to be, to be on the show recently. Yeah. And those are the dates that stuck in my mind. So look, to be on the safe side, if you book to tick, we'd be happy if you book to tick it between the eighth and the fifth. So that's the period that both Alistair and I, so the 28th and the fifth,

that's the period that both Alistair and I are confident that the show is definitely on. Yeah. And then if you feel like taking a gamble, and you want to book it between the 25th and the 28th or the fifth and the eighth. Yeah, if you want to try and do something impossible. Either one or other of us could be right about that as well.

Sure. So you could come in that period of time. But look, all of this can be resolved if you visit the link below to the Comedy Festival website books and tickets through trybooking.com. Yeah. Or as I like to call it, succeedbooking.com. Absolutely.

Why try when you could just do booking? Do booking. So I've written down not my shit. And not without my shit, that's a similar. It's more like not without my daughter, where a person gets taken to the Middle East and then their partner It goes crazy and becomes really dominant and then expects them to not Leave leave to you know not leave them

But we're not take a shit or something or take a shit and then flush it yeah, and then well the other thing that could happen And then not Well, the other thing that could happen in not my shit, just sort of a, not without my shit kind of a thing, where at the end we reunite the person with their actual shit, because it is somebody else's shit. Oh, yeah. Right, and then they get given it in a bag and they take it home and they put it in the toilet and they flush it. Oh, so that's good.

Yeah, that's quite a nice resolution. Absolutely, that's poetry. Thanks a lot. So anyway, to everybody who's listened to this, I apologize. The reason why I got self-conscious about this is because I have a friend who said that at her work, they would make pottery and they would listen

to podcasts out loud. No. And she decided, hey, I like this podcast. And she decided to put on our podcast. And it's the one where we just started talking about long tits for the first 10 minutes or so. And then she's like, I'll just take it off. They never normally talk about this. they never normally talk about long tits. Yeah. I mean, I guess that's true, isn't it? It's not, but we never normally talk about anything,

except for maybe multiple universe theory or something like that. Yeah. This is the official podcast with the many worlds theorem. That's right. Do you, Alistair, I've seen a lot of people, this is new trend right online, where people who are excited about a movie,

it seems like not only do they not want spoilers for the movie, but they don't want to know anything about the movie, right? They don't want to know the, like they don't want to see a trailer, they don't want to see a teaser trailer, they don't want to see any promotional art for the movie or anything like that.

Like it's people who are so into the movie that they don't want to know anything about. They just want to know that it exists. But just the name. Maybe do they sometimes the name can give some support. I feel like that could be a giveaway. Yeah. And then so and I'm wondering like, is there something in that? And there's a little sidebar. Yeah. Is there something in, if you could watch it, like a teaser trailer or a trailer for the next five years of your life or something,

would you watch it? Just watch one trailer for five years. No. No. It's a trailer that gives you hints about what's gonna happen in the next five's going to happen in the next five years of my life. Oh, for the next five years of my life.

Of your life. Yeah. Well, this is a very different, completely different topic. Completely different topic. Let's talk about the first one. People don't want to know anything about the movie. Well, it's kind of, it's a strange complex issue for people who market things, because who market the movies, because they want to give you information

about the movie to make you want to watch it, but these people already want to watch it. Yeah, I would need to know that it exists. Well, I presume that they already want to watch it, the maximum amount that it's possible to want to watch something, right? So they're at peak, want to watch. And so not only could they not accommodate

any more want to watch from any marketing or media information that would come in or they would feel so sorry for your friend who switched off the podcast in front of the pottery class that we were talking about long tips. This podcast is not for public broadcast like it's not for that. It can be. It's... Maybe we should do a version that's like all the bits that you can play in public. Anyway, this one, this bit would be fine.

They're at maximum want to watch. They couldn't watch it, want to watch it anymore without like damaging their health presumably. Or what I think it might be also is that they're a peak wonder watch and watching anything else would actually make them want to watch it less. Like would you now bring them back to finish them the amount to which they want to watch it? Well, I wonder whether that's even possible because then, because all they really want to do is watch it.

And so even if they do want to watch it less, they still want to watch it a ton. Yeah. They just don't want to have it less, they still want to watch it a ton. Yeah. They just don't want to have it ruined. So I think that maybe marketing companies should offer a sort of a marketing sleeve, right? Yeah. And they sent it to your house and it's got that the name of the movie's on there and that it's going to come out what day it is going to come out.

And then it's kind of like a sleeping bag and you slide into it and then you seal it up. Like that. And then you stay in it'll lock. And then you stay in there until the movie comes out. Right, yeah. And like a cocoon, it sort of the end opens up and you emerge, maybe it has its own Wi-Fi. At the cinema, maybe you zip it,

you put yourself in this pod, and it's like a kind of suspended animation or sensory deprivation or something like that. And then as soon as the movies announce you go into it, and then they drain all the fluid out or whatever the goo that you've been suspended in, And you flop out all week and like no muzzle tone onto the floor of the cinema. You drag yourself into a seat and you watch the movie. I guess it's a good way that some of these companies could start making money that they don't,

you know, because you know, there's apparently that, I mean, they always say that there's money going down, but it seems like movies are getting bigger budgets and blah, blah, blah, blah. But I think it's much more getting like consolidated, it's all about this big tent pole, blah, blah, blah. Ten poles. So about ten poles. Anyway, so the way that they make it, as soon as they announce it, they offer, they offer you a pod.

Yeah. They go in there, they hook something up to your ass, they hook something up to your mouth, to your mouth, like hook something up to your mouth, like that, right? And they put you into suspended animation, but they keep you alive. And you basically are on a sort of a slow moving conveyor belt that's slowly moving towards the, you know, the front of the cinema. It gives you tickets to the opening screening. It gives you tickets to the opening screening. And then, yeah, you flop out at the end. But then, you've just been pumped full of nutrients that maximize excitement, enjoyment,

brain clarity, things like that, so that when you come out, no groginess whatsoever, you're just out and then you're straight into the music, so that you don't have to endure any of the suffering that comes from being excited, but having to wait. Anticipation, right? Anticipation. It's almost like, yeah, I can't wait for this movie to come out.

You don't have to. It's like no time or pass. I wonder like, you know, you flop out and like, maybe they hand you like your preferred size of popcorn. Yeah. It's a heightened version of gold class cinnamon or something like that. And possibly you don't have to also watch the movie

with any of the scum that aren't, you know, like that wouldn't do this. Well, I think it would be quite funny to have those people there as well. Like for some reason, but you're then just sitting there sort of dripping with goo, and then a whole bunch of people sort of come in and sit down next to you and then don't really know what the movie is. I picture that you also don't have any eyebrows or hair left. Yeah. Something in the goo process removes all your hair and things like that. I think

this is pretty neat. No eyelashes. Played out as like one of those bits that would be just like a puff piece in a show like you know Nine news or all the project or whatever where it's like these fans are so excited for The upcoming movie the revenge of Gilgorn. Yeah, they've decided to have their bodies frozen, and they'll spend it in a miserable way. Why I'm doing it in that voice. That's okay, that's okay Andy. That's the kind of voice that they would do, I think. Maybe that's why it is. But also the whole idea is that they don't want to hand, not only they don't want to have to feel anticipation,

but they also don't want to have anything ruined for them. So the idea that they would go through all this and then be in the cinema with just regular people who are idiots who are just going to be like, woo! Like that. I guess it's a funny bummer for them. Funny bummer.

Funny bummer. Now, or like, you know, some, yeah, just whatever can happen for them to just like really quickly and efficiently have the movie ruined for them. Or then they like, because they're still like that specific kind of movie nerd who just like start hate things now because they're not as good as what they might have imagined they would be. Sure, but I mean, maybe this also removes that opportunity from them to head. You don't even get to imagine it beforehand.

If the companies could just put a chip in your brain, that as soon as, instead of announcing the movie, because I think even having the movie announced would be of some struggle to them, instead when the movie is officially announced, if they pressed a button that just made them unconscious, wherever they are. You fall to the ground and a team comes to your house. Yeah, collects you. It likes you, puts you in the go, you wait in the go,

until you're flopped out, you resume consciousness. Without even knowing that the movie was coming out and then suddenly you're watching the movie. You're watching the movie. So then the period of time in your life where you're actually just a regular human being is diminished and all you're doing really is watching the movies that you want to watch. And I think maybe you could just give, you know, it's just a like a Marvel, a Marvel universe, sort of chip. And so that way you've just accepted, you know, you're just signing a thing.

It's like signing up for Netflix or whatever, that you just want, I want to see all of these things. And then they just take, you know, $23 a day from your, from your thing while you're in the goo, in the goo tank. And then it's kind of in there, you know of in their best interest to keep making more and more. So that at some point, it can keep you in the goo tank between the films. Yeah. I guess as soon as the movie ends, they could trigger it again. Yeah. Then you can dream about it.

You know, which can be in your tank. In your tank, I don't know if you dream. I guess that would kind of ruin things Yeah, I guess you yeah, but I think the good tank would be good though I look I love any sketch that involves a tank of goo Hey, you know it opens some of that to steam Smoke sort of comes out. There's a flashing light. It goes beep, beep, but it just feels really nice when other people do it Pat you down with a towel. Yeah to dry you. I don't know that I've ever been padded down But like it's a little year before when I was a baby well even when you were like probably five or six your parents

Probably still padded you down. No, I've padded myself down from a really early age really. Yeah, is that just a thing you know about yourself? Yeah, that's right. I was myself down from a really early age. Really? Is that just a thing you know about yourself? That's right. I was a early, early pated down. A doctor of the towel. Is it, to go to the other idea about would you watch a trailer for your own life? Is that like, I guess, to ignore everything we said in the previous sketch about people who don't want to anticipate

or don't want to have things spoiled for them in that way. But one of the things that trailers and teasers and that sort of thing do do is that for the general population is in crease excitement. And they make you want to go and see something. So like, you reckon you could edit a trailer for the next year or five years or whatever of your own life that would make you really excited to live your life and be like, oh wow.

And then like you'd live your life and you'd be like, oh, I really put all the good bits in the trailer, didn't I? Yeah, they really put all the best jokes in there. Yeah. It was only really two jokes in the next five years. Yeah, I think it could only really lead to me being bummed out. Yeah, right. But like, but if it was if it was effective, and they they just gave a few little hints

about some of the things that could happen. And then you could, and it's like, it's not, it's one of those good trailers that doesn't really give anything away. So it's not going to affect, it's not a paradox. It doesn't affect the course of reality or anything like that. It's just enough to get you excited. But then like, at some point, I see like I'm dressed like a like, like I'm in a SWAT team. Yeah. And like,

and then oh, this is the soaking from the trial. Yeah, you go, I wonder what's happened in my life in the next five years for me to wind up in a SWAT team. Yeah. Maybe it's a Halloween costume, maybe it's a, but maybe I've just completely changed careers. And you could do, you know, could do deconstructions and there's,

I guess, theories that have to be fans of your own life to come up with fan theories. I guess that would happen with celebrities. You know, celebrities could release, it'd be a big thing on Twitter. You release the trailer for you next five years. People are like, oh my God, I wonder what's gonna happen to Jim Hall.

The American jazz musician from the 1900s. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. He's released his trailer.

His trailer. Pfft. Do you think that like you could plan your life to such an extent that you would be able to film a trailer for your own life? Like this is a slightly different kind of. So this is where you sort of after the fact? No no, beforehand. You're like, I know exactly what I'm going to be doing over the next five years.

So like a goals trailer? Yeah, you film a little, a few little scenes, you get some actors or whatever. I mean, this sounds like exactly the kind of product that you could sell to some people who are young entrepreneurs. And like it's like a self-help kind of idea. Yeah. Is that you're sort of a vision board. It's like a, it's a trailer board.

Yeah. Yeah, you're you're a vision board. It's like it's a trailer board. Yeah, I mean Obviously that that is also what you would call somebody who Picture this their future. I mean, it's a vision board, but where they Just want to pull a lot of stuff behind their car. Yeah, yeah, I mean that could be confusing, but yeah We'll get around that somehow All right a vision trailer trailer maybe. Sure. But then again, that could be a trailer that has hallucinations. Yeah. Like a that you tow behind a car but that has hallucinations.

Yeah. Or that you have hallucinations in. Or about. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, if anything, we've made it more confusing. I feel bad. Yeah. But like, if you made that, like, you know, what, what, what, what do we get at that else? Is there any kind of sketch in that? Well, yeah, I mean, it actually just seems like a genuine business idea. I mean, like, because I think there's people who believe so strongly in the idea of setting goals and things like that, that they'd probably be willing to spend $15,000, $20,000, where you put them in different scenes, you know, walking up to a big tall skyscraper, they look to the sky, they're wearing a suit and a brief

case and you see them walking into, you know, some, you know, I don't know, accounting, larger accounting, Ernst and Young. Yeah. Somebody picking up a phone and saying, get me, Lisa have a stash. Yeah. It's Lisa have a stash as a trailer. Okay. She's made to seem vital to... Yeah. Or it's a man who in his future hopes to have Lisa have a stash brought to him.

Sure. So he puts that in his trailer. That's one of his goals. Just to either be the top of a business where he can summon her or to be her or have a henchman. Sure. Yeah, have henchman. And then you go ahead and you've made this trailer, then you go ahead and you live

your life. And then after five years, you're like, oh, they really must have cut a lot of the scenes that were in the trailer out of the eventual edit of the film. Yeah. All the life. Of the life. I mean, for you to be able to make it without them knowing that would be the ultimate, you know, so like, how about this? OK, so this is very similar to the previous idea where they kind of knock you out. And they use your body to film a trailer based on, they go through all your phones and everything,

all your Google docs and your emails and things like that to figure out what you want. How about this, right? It's like your life, but you have a director for your life. So before you go into any room or to any location or meet with anybody, you have somebody that you can discuss your motivation with what you're trying to get out of the scene and what your lines are or whatever like that. And then so your life stops being just a bunch of stuff that happens and has some kind of consistent, authorial voice like a clear stylistic and narrative

drive from an author. So you get who's the godfather guy? school Francis Ford Coppola you get Coppola you get Coppola. He's just making wine now. Yeah, all right. He could he could use You know he could use a project Making wine is not a valid project. I'm yeah, I'm insinuating I suppose You go hey got this proposition for you. It's about two, three million bucks. They're over the next couple of years. I just need an author to direct me and what I'm doing.

And for a sort of maximum entertainment value out of my own life, but also emotional potency. And these are roughly the things that I would, the directions I'd like to go to. And so yeah, and he'd be telling you in a lot of scenes that you're gonna go in, you're gonna smash it table or something like that, you're gonna get really angry.

Yeah, I think that's really good. I think that would be, I think this is a sketch. Okay. That you have a, you hire a director for your own life to make it, you know, more watchable, I guess, more interesting. It's kind of like with a movie like, I think, Justice League or something like that, where they had one director and then they didn't like the direction when they saw it because they didn't like the direction the movie was going so they brought

someone else in to do a bunch of reshoots and that sort of thing. Yeah. This but like up until this point I've been self-directed. Yeah. You know. And it's much life like representing yourself in court. Yeah. And this is how people sell it to you later on. They go, you wouldn't represent yourself in court. You're not a, you know, a lawyer. You don't have any training, you're an idiot, stuff. In the same way, you don't know how to direct a life. And it's kind of hard to be both the main actor in a role and also the director of the thing. And I know Coppola has a thing where, you know, he gets a lot of the actors together before he makes a film and just gets them to cook together,

you know, to create a bond between them that he might wanna be able to reproduce on screen. And so maybe. Really? Yeah. That's so cool. Yeah, and so. Anybody gets a free meal out of it as well?

And he gets right, it's a big scam. And he was in, the Godfather was really about Francis getting to eat some ravioli. Getting Marlon Brando to make him paella. Yeah, Spanish food for an Italian movie. Yeah. That's why he's a complicated guy. And that's what comes through and is in the movie.

I know I said the word paella, but in my mind I was saying calzone. through and is I know I said the word paella but in my mind I was saying Calzone. And that's that's that's the complexity of you Andy. Where was I going? Right. Yes. Oh yeah and then but then he's also like okay so you guys you know I've kind of got a big plans for you guys in the in the future so you guys don't know each other right now but I want to kind of create this bomb because you guys are going to meet in about a year and a half. And I want there to kind of be instant chemistry because I want you guys. You guys are going to hit off possibly in a kind of relationship type way. Things like that. So, um, anyway, let's, let's make Lingguini. Right. Yeah. He's a related but then another slight step for that idea, which is like, rather than

a director who sort of tells you what to do in your life, you have sort of a, and this is coming off the represent yourself in court, sort of think, you wouldn't represent yourself in court. So why should you represent yourself in like an argument with your sister or a disagreement with a person that is sandwiched bar or something like that. The idea that you would have with you at all times a personal argueer, right? And maybe they're not a legal expert, but they are an argument expert. So they're an expert at using all the kinds of arguments that you use in regular arguments or disagreements. Yeah. So like, oh, this is typical of you.

You know, so they do it in a sort of a semi legal, I submit that this is typical of you. Sandwich maker. Yeah. Right. I said it was at a sandwich bar. I didn't say it was necessarily with a sandwich bar maker. Sure. The guy who makes the sandwich bar.

That's right. Yeah. I know. You've come in before they're even open. He's still screwing the Bain Marie together. Yeah. You're furious because the sign on the door said open. Said open.

Yeah. And then your litigator steps in or you argue argumenter steps in maybe the door was open But there was no sign there for it was implied I put it to you that it was implied that it was open when we walked in You signed a contract Saying that you would provide sandwiches having your sign up there that says sandwiches for sale I feel like we've had an idea on this podcast before, which was about something like this. We do off like an app or something like that. Ideas where somebody steps in to live your life for you.

That is true. I wonder what that's about. But I do like this. This is, sorry, then. I'm reverting back to the director idea, where at some point, I'm sorry that I'm I'm I'm reverting back to the director idea where at some point Let's say that the the directors got you Sort of sneaking around somebody's house in the middle of the night using a screwdriver to break in yeah And you're kind of like oh, this is really exciting. I didn't or like I don't think this is something my character would do And he's like now trust me or like this is what we he's in your ear like he's in your just go Okay now break all the glass around here, around the side of the window and climb in and steal that dollhouse.

Yeah. And then, you know, he gets you... And then, something you get arrested. Why am I doing this? It'll all become clear. Yes, soon. It's going to be a big reveal at the end. You're building up to a big reveal.

Imagine that your whole life. You don't even know why you're doing all this stuff. And then there's a big reveal at the end, you're building up to a big reveal. Imagine that, your whole life. You don't even know why you're doing all this stuff. And then there's a big reveal at the end and you're like, wait, I was his sister or I was, I was his sister. Any, I think that's fine. Yeah, great. But that would be great.

If you found out that the whole time you were actually the other sex. Yeah, because there's never, there's never really a twist in life. Yeah. You don't ever discover really why you were actually the other sex. Yeah. Because there's never, there's never really a twist in life. Right. You don't ever discover really why you were doing stuff later on. Yeah. Unless you did it while you were asleep. It's almost like I've got no structure whatsoever.

Yeah. Yeah. Where are the big reveals? Yeah, because you often plan your life for something good to happen, but you never plan your life for something surprising to happen. Yeah. I guess you could sort of try to emit some information from your life for something surprising. Yeah. I guess you could sort of try to emit some information from your life.

And in many ways, that's what these people who are trying to not to not know anything about a film before they go into it. They're setting up, planning their life in such a way so that there is a big surprise. Yeah. And that is a movie. Well, the only big reveals are those people like Eric Clapton who find out that their sister was their mom.

Did that happen to Eric Clapton? I think so, yeah. Wow. Like wearing a mask or something like that? Yeah. She was wearing a mask the whole time. That's how she disguised herself as his sister. Yeah, and then he saw the strap there.

He was like, wait a second. You're skinned. Like, you know, because over time, the rubber would start to wear. He's like, your skin's starting to perish. Like that, so that was a certain age. We got to Eric. Brother? My brother?

Sorry. Ah. Oh no, my dementia's kicking in and revealing might be. My dementia's kicking in and revealing my meat. My dementia's kicking in. But I think this personal personal Agua yeah To take over your your arguments and use

Use the the the the techniques of Disagreements or whatever you know normal domestic arguments that you would have In a legal kind of way could it be called like your argument butler. Yeah, great. Yeah your argument valet Valet or valet valet They take your guy away Take you guy away. They take the person you're going to argue with and they

You got it why. My argument, Velaide. I've lost it now. Yeah. No, look, hey, Alistair, there comes a time where we're just making noises and that's all right. Okay. Just sort of, this sound sounds a bit like this sound. Yeah. That's art, you know? That'd be great if there was a sort of an alternative. Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession resistant career

and a rewarding field with plenty of growth opportunities and often flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career evaluation. You could start your new career in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus, and financial aid is available to qualified students, including the GI Bill. Now is the time. Mycomputercareer.edu. World or just a country where we domesticated whales and we would ride on them. Yeah. I mean like like I guess at some point you would have to have technology that allows you to breathe underwater and

so like even just scuba technology. Well people kind of do that a bit with dolphins and stuff at sea world. Yeah. Right? They'll stand on the back of two dolphins who'll swim along, which is amazing and crazy and awful to the dolphins. Maybe they love it. Maybe they love having a lot of human weight on their backs.

Yeah. I mean, you feel that pressure on them. Somebody weight on their backs. I mean, you feel that pressure on them. When you're somebody stands on your back. Near your blowhole. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's like it's like somebody standing on your throat.

Yeah. On the back of your throat. You love that. But you know, like I guess there'd be sort of, I guess much like the horse industry. There would be like, you know, guys who go and break whales. Yeah. Well then would this work in like a, would you have to be like a canal kind of a city like

Venice or something like that? Where instead of the people who do the horse rides up and down the streets of Melbourne, you know, in a carriage, you, there'll be somebody clinging to the back of a whale who comes along one of the canals and the whale flops up out of the canal and you see them, they emerge out of the water. So, romantic whale ride for Valentine's Day. Yeah, I suppose that would be the probably, you know, I guess in the end, a lot of these things have to kind of be cheapened through their commerciality. Yeah.

It's not enough to just have an animal companion. Does the whale have blinkers on or something like that so that it can't be distracted? Well, I guess if it's just walls of the canals. I guess in this scenario where they would require that is that to be a lot of motorized like water vehicles around that would start all the way. Skiddo's and make them dive. Yeah. I mean, if those skiddo's just sinking all over the place,

because they're the snow one, right? They really distracted. That would probably require blinkers. It's like a canal city, but up into the point of the canal, it's all snowmounds. Wow. So it's like a... So whether the canal's not, but they're not frozen over. No, the canals are heated. Yeah, well they're they're they're coming. It's actually, they're very high canals. They go... They're very high canals. They go, the walls. The walls go up about 200 meters.

Yeah, okay, right. So two above the snow line. Well, none of the, they go to above the water line. And so it's just very tall walls. And then at the top of the wall, it's just like, it's eight mountain incline that just meets straight away. And it's just chair lifts at the beginning

to take you up to the top of Shalate. This is a city. And it's an example of human ingenuity where they thought that this landscape would have been impossible to domesticate. And yet, look at this perfectly functioning city we've built. I mean, sure the occasional Skidoo plunges into a canal. But don't worry, we've put blinkers on the whales. I'll tell you this.

So that they don't get startled. This is one of the worst urban planning. I know, but what an achievement. Cutting down to make these canals and just bring the ocean in. Because it has to be connected to the ocean. But you know what would be the best thing at this in this nightmare land.

At this nightmare, no, it'll be a wonderful land. Sorry. The very rich, it's in Switzerland, I think. Yeah, it'll be a wonderful land. Sorry. The very rich. It's in Switzerland, I think. Yeah. Oh, it's one of those Danish things. Yeah, it's a Danish thing or something. It's very sustainable, apparently.

And everybody's surf and turf for every meal. Where's the turf? Well, they're mountain cows. Yeah, but they're not only turf. They're all standing on glaciers. It's more like a... Peat lamps, ice and mice. Ice and mice, do you think it'd just be like,

you'd eat ice? Ice and slice. I guess like you could eat seal, snow and flow. Snow and flow. Snow and flow, so it's like mountain goat and... River whale. River canal whale. All right, Alistair. And it's not a sketch, I did.

It's not a sketch, I do. No, I had something at the start of that, but fell away. Like, you know, It's domesticating the whale. Wow, I mean, that's interesting, isn't it? Domesticator whale. The blue whale is so enormous. Yeah. That, I mean I have you'd have to breed a small one.

I don't think so. I think the idea would be, instead of a pen we normally have for horses, which is really a two-dimensional pen. The fence has a certain width to it Hiked to it. I mean obviously it has some width, but it's the hike that's really important so that the horse doesn't jump over In the wrong way, but I think with this you would need kind of a large sort of 3D sort of pen that would be You know of a certain volume that allows the whale to You know thrash around and kind of move around. And then in the middle is just a guy with a, I don't know, just a lasso or some fishing line.

And he knows how to sort of move it through the water to kind of break a whale. Break a whale. Yeah, I mean, I don't see if you think this can be filmed. If you think that we can produce this on a reasonable budget, you know, Australian screen Australia funding, then I think it can be done with plasticine. Could be done with plasticine. Maybe. Yeah. And some stop motion animator. And some blue cellophane, maybe for the water, could be the water, you know. Is there anything in a... In a...

Because you know, plasticine, you can mould it and you can stop motion it to make it look like people. Is there anything in being able to get people to act and behave in such a way and film in such a way that they look like plasticine. I will say like blocks of plasticine It sounds like a great kids show You know like a live stage show. Yeah, it's probably dance because I think just the only way, you know, it's like I think I think it's It's up to the dancers to figure out how you move like plasticine would move. Not at all, I'm pretty sure. Sure, but what if you're made to look like a claymation style thing?

Yeah, that'd be great actually. Yeah. And then, but then you also do have to kind of like deform your body to a certain extent. Yeah, to get those weird effects and be able to extend your arm. It's done to sound impossible. It's done to sound about as achievable as your three-day wild pin, wild breaking idea. Oh, it's just, look, that was it. They're both just starting points. Yeah. No, while breaking idea. Oh, it's just, look, they're both just starting points. Yeah, I'm sorry.

That's fantastic, Elisdair. Well, that was the idea, that they're both fantastic, quite a fantastical idea. Fantastic. Yeah. Is there something about SeaWorld as being like a model, like they did originally started as like, this is what the world could be like if we worked with aquatic animals. The vision, whoever it was, the eccentric person who started to see world was sort of a pioneer who wanted society to be like that.

Yeah, to be see world. And it was like their vision of like a utopia in which we work together with authors and dolphins and seals. Which are the closest thing to brethren, I think we have. Yeah. Yeah, maybe the person was very interested in the lost city of Atlantis. I mean, but then the lost city of Atlantis was lost

because it wasn't always under the ocean, right? Right. Right. So the idea, I assume. So then I guess back in the day, it's not so it's not that there was an underwater society there. That is correct, Alistair. There wasn't an underwater society there. Right. Well then maybe that's not a good viable. It's an amazing thing to go from there was a city that sank under the waves to the sort of the modern perception that we often have of Atlantis where people are somehow breathing and living underwater.

Like the leap that it takes to get between those two things. Yeah, there's something someplace that was kind of permanently flooded. Yeah. And then there, people have somehow evolved or developed technology to be able to breathe under the ocean. Yeah, I guess that would be like a sort of like a modern town, let's say like Texas went through that somewhere, somewhere in Texas that was that flood maybe last year. Right.

Yeah, but it's like water up to your sort of just above your knee. And then taking that, but then picturing them as being sort of see creature up to just about their knee. Well, yeah, like they're, yeah, just, you know, their ankles were starting to evolve. I think that's funny. Yeah. In that like, because they interview, there's been this flood in this town, right? And they interview the mayor, right? And the mayor's like, well, we've got, you know, we've got two options. We could spend, you know, the $1.5 billion it takes to, um, to drain all this water, restore all the facilities, or we could look at the writing on the wall, okay? And say that these kinds of events are only going to become more and more common.

Water levels are going to rise and we could just make the hard decision now that we're going to Atlantis this shit. And our current plan is for our population to evolve to become aquatic. Yeah, and so we'll start with our ankles. So we'll start small up to our ankles. Sort of that kind of like green spotty skin. Yeah, like kind of like frogs. Yeah, kind of like frogs or anything kind of a bit amphibious.

Grip a bit better in the water. Grip, give them that kind of like ability to sort of climb trees a little bit better. Which we can go up there, we can start laying our eggs and that'll be the next part. We'll start laying eggs sort of in mud. Maybe if you can, you know, our ultimate goal is to be able to be completely immersed in mud and be able to sort of breathe.

I think that's great. And then there can be like various different working groups from the council, from City Hall who come out and try and help people to learn to do that. So they get together a group. There's the working group's going to be coming to this, this neighborhood on this date and they'll be running elementary courses in mud nest. Mud nesting. Mud nesting and

fly, catching and that sort of thing. Yeah and sort of how to use your ears like gills. Yeah. We're working on getting the community And I like the idea that most of the communities on board with this idea like they're quite positive about it Yeah, I'm just well. I'm just glad they're doing something. Yeah, and just you know a couple of hold out all Men and women that just are like I'm not leaving my house and moving into some mud I'm not giving up my legs. My earth, my earth like quality. Yeah. My earth bound quality.

I'm just gonna build, use some sandbags. They're from Texas and they're, they're gonna show an accent. Yeah, they're holdouts. Holdouts. They're gonna show a holdouts. And then it becomes, it comes a bit of a division in the city and they are sort of maybe shattering

it each other. And then there's like an un-inter, you know, it's not like a race war, but it's sort of you know, aquatic or amphibious versus terrestrial sort of war. And for some reason, the amphibious people have kind of really taken to it and they've added little triangles to the top of their pitch to it. And they've added little triangles to the top of their pitchforks, so they look more like tritons. Yeah, right.

We're just trying to make the most of a bad situation. Sure, I mean, look, if you want to give up and just keep living in that house, Jesus, like a lot of us are still living in our houses. We're just accepting the mud and silt as a new part that we can embrace rather than feel angry all the time at, at its build up in our in our bathrooms and things. Like younger people would be more likely to get on board with the new semi-acquatic lifestyle. Yeah. And the, and it's the older people

who are sort of holding out and a bit judgmental about it. Yeah, I definitely think you know, that's, you know, people are stuck in their ways. And I think our, you know, the younger generations are more used to change. Ironically, they're real stick in the muds. That's right. Yeah. Whereas we are actually in the mud.

We're actually in the mud, yeah. Living in it. But we're not stuck because we're, we're moved, they're stuck because they're actually refusing to move. Yeah. Refused to move in the muds. Refused to move in the muds.

Yeah. Maybe they walk around on stilt or something like that splashing through the water. Don't want to go in it. Yeah, I think I think that's something. And maybe there's another part of the town that decides to find ways to just hover all the time so that they become air creatures. Yeah. Creatures of the air. Yeah, great. And so they move their houses higher or they move up into the trees.

Yeah. And there's huge advances instead of tree house technology, find ways of getting rid of loose branches so that you can have a kind of landing area. I think that they sometimes swoop down and will snatch one of the people out of the water and take them away to their trees to eat them. Or, yeah, yeah, eat them and maybe like turn them into their own. And the other ones start creating completely underwater caves and nests so that they can protect their young from under water caves and nests so that they can protect their young from this from the sky folk. But then there's yeah, like this is all happening under like

the kind of the guidance of the council, the clear decisions and they're having town hall meetings and that sort of thing. People are starting to look more like like the beasts that they yeah, but it's But I think it's also all, it's not really evolution, right? It's all just stuff that they've sort of stuck on there on their faces or something, because that's what we're doing. Well, they find by putting more triangular, sharp shapes over their faces, they can cut through the wind a bit better, like these airborne ones.

And the other ones are just kind of always have a bit of silt over them and the slime that kind of protects them from the sun and things like that because they're always out. The coldness of the water. The coldness of the water, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We've had a bit of backlash since we made the decision to pursue an Atlantis style approach to water and environmental management. Well, they kind of become a wetland society. Yeah.

Where, yeah. And so then they just, I mean, this is not through any explicit thing, but they do just start taking over all of those ecological niches that are in there. So then there's some people who start living kind of more like capybarras or whatever there's capybarras things. And so they live. Oh, well, a lot just rodent. Yeah, and they live start living

in kind of like tall grass and just resting there. And they kind of grow their hair a little bit more, using kind of like reverse laser hair removal technology. I guess these are people who have those clinics that allow you to get your hair back when you're balding. Well, they decide to use that to go all over the body so that they don't burn and they can just live over tall grass and never experience cool or warmth, just at a constant state of comfort. Yeah, like we achieve with cluds.

Like we achieve with capy bars or whatever they're called. I think that's something, Alistair, and I think that's actually five sketches, ideas. Do you want to take us through them so we can hear what we came up with? Yep, so we have not my shit. Somebody who believes that the thing came out of their ass was not their shit and then they think that there's been some kind of a rectum swap throughout the night, and there's sort of maybe possible freaky Friday style lightning strike. They post photos online to kind of find who it belongs to and possibly so that they can track down their own. A doctor tells them that it's actually probably just a change in diet that they recently

had, that had that. Some faceless man comes up with a briefcase full of money in a tape recorder that says, thank you for your cooperation. And then somehow from that, this person, I guess, seems unsatisfied. There is a kind of resolution where they do get their own shit back in a sort of zip lock back and they put it in the toilet and flush it.

And I'll say that's very impressive. It is a short film. Your ability to remember all the details of that bloomy away. I was, it was almost like I'd been in that spoiler situation from the next one because I was actually surprised by some of the twists and turns in that tale that we came up with together. I'd be willing to storyboard this pretty soon. I'll find where that missing chunk, what goes in that missing chunk and I think we'll have it, we'll get it pretty soon.

One of the ways that you could even, like, because very often once you start watching a movie, you sort of see the narrative unfolding and you could sort of like predict from the conventions of narrative and also just from the causal relationship between the actions of the people in the movie. You can see sort of what's going to happen next even even just like a you know a second to second basis. Like if a rock is rolling towards the edge of a cliff you're able to say oh I reckon that's going to fall down. Cliff, you're able to say, oh, I reckon that's going to fall down. Whereas if you had something in your mind so that you had no longer any short-term memory, you would no longer be able to make those connections. And so every single frame of the film would totally take you by surprise. And so you wouldn't even be given the spoilers of

you know, logic logical cause and effect. Wow. Any understanding of the rules of continuity or the laws of physics and stuff like that. Yeah. Constant state of surprise, which I believe is at some point, some religion that we came up with. That's right.

We got the no anticipation pod for, let's say, Marvel type movies or something like that where people who don't want to have anything to spoil. I was picturing Star Wars, the entire war is obviously. And that's what we can do now that there's these huge infinite franchises. Yeah. Where you, potentially, when the movie name is released, a chip in your brain that you've accepted to have in there, switches you off,

you get picked up and put into a like a slimy pod, where you're immersed in booze and up booze in slime, and then have a tube in your mouth and one out your sort of out holes in your out holes, and then you're just fed and kept in the dark, but you know, an suspended animation type thing until the first screening where you are, sort of slid out of your sack and padded down with towels by other people. And then you watched the film. The person, like so much of my enjoyment of this sketch is from the precise nature of that goo.

And now that you say sack, I kind of like the idea that within the pod there's some goo. And then within that goo, there's like a sack almost like an amniotic sack that you're then within and then inside that there's a further type of goo. So they open the pod, the outer goo pours out onto the floor, you flop out in your sack. They have to like get a big knife and cut that open. to go pause out onto the floor, you flop out in your sack. They have to like get a big knife and cut that open. And then that goes, and then you're pulled out of that in a sack.

Yeah, I don't think that the release from the sack is that dissimilar from a giraffe being born. Exactly. Yeah. Of course, you're hairless and then you watch the film. Yeah. And then potentially you're just zapped straight away and then put straight back into this sack. And I think this could be presented so satisfactorily as one of those puff pieces like that they

would do like about these people already queuing up for the new Star Wars movie or the new iPhone or whatever it is. Absolutely. Yeah. Then we got higher a director for your own life. You get a couple on board, say, I don't really like the direction that I've been going with my own life. And I think it would kind of be, I could maximize it of emotional and blah, blah. To be honest, if you're bored with your life, this is exactly your problem, is that you're not a good director and you probably

shouldn't be in charge. A bit directionless. A bit directionless. And potentially what you could do is just, I mean, you know, like a sort of a less expensive version of this would just be swapping, say, I'm going to direct, you know, somebody you meet, maybe somebody you put out on Craigslist or something, I think you go, I'm looking for a director, but I'm also looking to do, I don't have any money, I'm looking to do a director's swap.

Yeah. And then you just direct each other's lives. Yeah, great. For a year or two, yeah. Yeah. Take it in turns. Take it in turns, yeah. And I guess the problem would be,

if you were doing it simultaneously, you could set a direct them to direct your life in a certain way. Sure, but, yeah, so are you saying that's the problem? That's why doing it simultaneously wouldn't work? Well, yeah, I can see that there's some conflict of interest kind of issues there and it might not be the best product at the end of the day. Yeah, that's true. But it will save you money. Argument valet, she's a person who will step in for you.

At all points in your life, this is based on the idea that you're not the best person to argue for yourself or represent yourself in court. Yeah. Well, why just have a lawyer for court? Why not have somebody for any kind of conflict in your life to get you the best out of all situations? Yeah.

Just a real hard ball like, you know, it could be, it could even be like a union leader, an out of work union leader who's just looking for ways of just getting more for you. And they're not prepared, they're not ashamed to go low or play the man or whatever rhetorical techniques they can employ to get the best outcome. Threaten your family. Yeah. to get the best outcome. Threaten your family. Then we have a flood plan to evolve city. The flood plan is to evolve the city, to evolve the people in the city, to more aquatic creatures or potentially other evolutionary niches.

And so you get a bit of a wetlands society, possibly in some town in Texas. Yeah, and this is all coming from city hall. It's all coming from city hall. Really, I just want to sketch in which we can use the word city hall a lot, because town meetings, which we don't get any town meetings in our town. And then I've realized that we also need to do

one of our Patreon. Oh, I would someone give us three words. They gave us three words. We have Daniel Pierce. I love this. We gave us three words. This is fast becoming my favorite part of the podcast. There you go.

And while we're here, I should name some people who've donated money to the Patreon. Oh, thanks, and Patreon people. Well, I've got Daniel Hooks, Daniel Pierce. It says here Curtis Brennick. It says $1 deleted, but I don't know whether that was that they removed one thing or whether they're completely gone either way. At some point they were involved.

Curtis Brennick, thank you. Yeah, correct. Daniel Hooks, thank you. Daniel Pierce, thank you. Sam Evans, thank you. San Joe Panda, thank you. San Joe. San you. Sam Evans, thank you. San Joe Panda, thank you. San Joe. San Joe interacts with us a lot on Twitter as well.

Yeah. Thank you, San Joe. Thank you all for that. And also, so does Daniel Hooks, I believe. Look, and everybody who I don't, sometimes maybe people don't go by their regular name on Twitter. And so maybe I'm not thanking them. So thank you for everybody who interacts with you. You're going to read out every single Patreon supporter. Well, this one goes back to December where and alan danut i do think i've already thanked and you

alan danut and then we got carl on burger to remember saying that and we got better in bed i don't think i remember ever thinking of better in bed no but thank you thank you better in bed uh... thank you steve hackland thank you james row thank you am a sharp thank you fin Thank you, Better and Bed. Thank you, Steve Hackland. Thank you, James Rowe. Thank you, Emma Sharp.

Thank you, Finlay Williams. Thank you, Jack Henderson. Thank you, Nico Oxman. Thank you, Alan Clarkson. Thank you, Jason Ballard. Thank you, Curtis Brennick. Again. Well, there's that guy.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, that was when he pledged. Yeah. Thank you, Bert Goldsmith. Okay, and you, and people who, Jason, that was when he pledged. Thank you, Bert Goldsmith. Okay, and people who support the podcast just so you know that in the future, we won't be reading it out when you take away your support. All right, that was that's happened this one time.

And look, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's expected. It's even encouraged. Because taking away a pledge is still a form of interaction and we'll take anything. Absolutely. And we're thinking about some points and potentially starting to do an episode that

is only Patreon dedicated and for some level. A few exciting things coming up for Patreon supporters. So we're going to really expand our offering. Yeah, because I think we're not offering them much, but we're offering this three word thing so far. And so there's been some take up on that. People are loving the three word. People are loving it, apparently.

Yeah, so what is the three words that we've got on this day? But just for anybody who may have sent in their three words and we haven't got to you. We haven't got to you. Do remind us in case that has happened. Okay, so Daniel Pierce's three words are platypus, commercial, and waffles. I mean, congratulations for the sheer range of those words. Well, yeah, we'll look by putting two of them together, we could get either commercial platypus or commercial waffles. Yes.

Well, commercial platypus ties into a thing that we've done a lot before about how, or we've talked about a couple of times on the podcast about how endangered species, different ones are struggling to get the coverage. But I feel like the platypus itself is actually getting quite good coverage in terms of people wanting to support the platypus and its endangered status.

Cause it's such an iconic and weird and interesting animal. Yeah. Another thing is that platypus are a bio indicator. So they're one of those species where you can look at their success in the ecosystem. And that'll tell you about the overall health of the ecosystem because they occupy a place in the food chain where if things are going badly, the health of platypus is very often affected quite quickly, severely by changes in pollution and that sort of thing. So potentially, you could use them not only for sort of bio-indicating, but maybe for sort of as a commercial indicator, you could put them say in your waffle house.

And if they thrive, then that's a good way of knowing that your waffle house is doing well. Yeah, I think that's really great. Because how about this? Because there's health inspectors who come around and inspect your premises to see whether or not, and they'll look, are there any rats? And very often rats in the kitchen is treated as a bad thing. But what they're neglecting is that at least rats

can survive in there. Yeah. Right? Like if all the rats in there were dead, that actually might be more of a concern because what that's telling you is that that is not a healthy environment. They come into your commercial kitchen

and you have a thriving wetland. If you have platypuses and kingfishes, swooping and diving and frolicing. All based off of the waffles that you drop off on the ground. Yeah, whatever it is, that's telling you that is a really healthy kitchen. That's right, yeah. And it's kind of one of those, it's a different way of being clean.

Like you can be sterile and clean, sure, or you can have a healthy type of bacteria and living creatures such as a whole sort of, you know, hawk platypus type ecosystem. A small river system going in the overflow from the dishwashing station across down past the Sue salads. Yeah. And, you know, and I think I've seen a thing maybe in national geographics where when they reintroduced predators to a kitchen floor. Okay, that's really interesting because you've got the rats.

That's what the problem is because the rats is, that's not a balanced ecosystem. No. Right? It's just a rat. And it says, you've got prey, but you've got no predators. Yes. So possibly wolves. Wolves.

Yeah, I think, I mean, it seems like that's the, you know, they're the noblest of the predators. Because they're loyal, but also, you know, they work together. Yeah. And they're, they're quite pretty. So you get a functioning ecosystem, obviously, including, and they might even divert the direction of the taps.

Well, the beavers, once they start building dams and the, I mean, it's complicated. We've got quite a small kitchen. I imagine all of the kitchen's I've worked in have been quite small. Well, this could change how kitchens are made. Right. Yeah. But more kitchen. Like an open range kind of a thing. Yeah. And so that you don't eat sitting at a table either. Maybe you're in a sort of on

on in a Jeep. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Log. Maybe possibly like a floating log. If there's enough for us to get like a whole Forestry industry in there as well. Mm-hmm. That's a pretty good kitchen. It's a sort of a more holistic approach to cleanliness. Yeah Because it you know the rats also they are eating scraps Mm-hmm, right which is Good in that it's like it's clearing up. they're clearing up the tritocelars, they're like scavengers, but you need the rest of it to keep the rat population in check.

Yeah. Well, and also when you use sort of a commercial cleaner on your floor, right, it's something that kills everything. It's essentially the God flood of answers that you know at the end of every day, God floods the ground and just murders everything there because he's unhappy with the quality of the floor. And then you start again every day like that. But this one is a kind of a it's a much more healthy and especially morally healthy. Yeah. I mean, another approach would be to introduce a kind of a rat, Jesus, who tries to save or, you know, change the ways the rats. Yeah, that's true. Lead them on a better path.

That maybe rather than or like a kind of like a Buddha rat that rather than going and stealing scraps that they just kind of stand at the edge of the kitchen and beg for scraps, a Buddha rat. So anyway, that's that sketch idea. Thank you very much, very much Daniel Pierce. I'm just gonna write down, I think that counts as a sketch I did. Yeah, I mean, there are some bloody hallmarks

of some bloody classic two in the think tank thinking in that sketch. We love a good ecosystem. We love a Jesus. We love animals doing the jobs of something instead of whatever. Anyway, thank you. You brought out the best in us, Daniel Pierce. Yeah.

And boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM Thank you so much for listening to The Think Tank. We really enjoyed it. We are part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. You can listen to so many great other podcasts such as The Weekly Planet, Do Go On, Antidana. Don't you know who I am? Don't you know who I am? Don't you know who I am, Phil's the casuals. Seriously, serious issues.

The little dumb dumb club, some Will Anderson podcasts. Yes, Tofop. Tofop, Steel Wars, and others, guys, all much more successful than us. Yes, keep it over. guys, all much more successful than us. And so feel happy to just abandon us and go to them, because that's how generous we are with our listenership. If you love something, let it go.

And we do love. And we do love. Yeah, but we're going to say that at the end of the video later. And if you don't want to go though, or even if right back. But, and you can, if you choose, if you don't wanna go though, or even if you do wanna go and you wanna give us a gift before you leave, you can support us on Patreon. On Patreon. Turn Think Tank Slash Patreon.

No. The other way around. Patreon.com slash Two in Tank. That's it, yeah. Um. And then on Twitter, I'm at Alistair TV. I'm at Stupid Old Andy. And we're both at Two in Tank for the pod.

And we'll be doing a show at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival called The Andy Matthews and Alistair, Trombley Virtual, Sci-Fi sketch experience. Yes. And if you're in Melbourne or Australia, or the world and you have a huge amount of disposable income, or maybe even some miles, if you've got miles. Yeah, if you've got some flight flying miles, we would love those miles so we can go on a trip.

Or you could come and see the show and it's going to be a lot of fun. It's coming together. Some of the ideas that you will recognize from the part and then. And some of them have taken quite interesting direction. Yeah, interesting. And we love you. And thank you George for producing the podcast. Thank you so much George. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit Planet Broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. It's not optional, you have to do it. We used to go easy on it, but now you have to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This episode is brought to you by Progressive.

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