Simple Swedish Podcast - 269 - "OPEN PLAN DENTAL SURGERY"

Episode Date: January 20, 2021

Mouth Replica Kiss, Waiting is the Worst Part, Dental Cooling, Anaesthetic for my Friend, Freud Fury, Jerk Books, Better Gift Gif, Greeting Card Sleeve, Kelly's Klothing, DeodorbombGet Magma here: https://sospresents.com/programs/magmaHey, why not listen to Al's meditation/comedy podcast ShusherDon't forget TITTT Merch is now available on Red Bubble. Head over here and grab yourselves some swag....and you can support the pod by chipping in to our patreon here (thank you!)Two in the Think Tank is a part of the Planet Broadcasting family You can find us on twitter at @twointankAndy Matthews: @stupidoldandyAlasdair Tremblay-Birchall: @alasdairtb and instaAnd you can find us on the Facebook right hereGenuine shed find to George producing this episode. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Yeah, you're trying to try to bury your very clear and obvious first choice, behind under a pile of increasingly obscure, later choices. Alistair, we've all tried that trick. Is that what you think that all writing is? All writing is just an attempt to bury your opening. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Well, you feel like you've made some huge mistakes,

and I got a backtrack. But, fuck. We're moving forward to backtrack. But I've refused to edit. And so, the only thing I can do is to make flail more and more wildly in the hope of somehow erasing my prime mistakes from existing. I mean, it's the only,

it's, that's true for this podcast. Anyway, and that podcast is two in the thing. You're listening to two in the thing. Thank a podcast where we come up with five sketch ideas. I'm Andy and I'm Alistair. Mm. Welcome. Thank you.

And I was about to tell you, Andy, that I had an idea. And this is a genuine product that we could come up with. And I just say this episode is going so smoothly, it's almost grating. It's just the professionalism. It's a little off-putting. Andy, do you ever get this thing where you, like hairs from your mustache go up into your nose and tickle it?

Yes, yes, some of them get bent around and find their way up there into strange new locations and poke and they're quite, they're quite wiery. I mean, I think it gives us some insight as to what it would be like to kiss ourselves. Which, and it's like shooting yourself in the foot with your own gun. Do you realise, Alistair, that in the near future, children will be taught to kiss, or teenage will be taught to kiss, they'll learn to kiss by kissing an exact, um, a sentient 3D replica of their own mouth that kisses exactly like they do to allow them to objectively learn what it's like to be kissed by themselves and therefore, they'll be so much better at kissing than we ever could have been.

No, well, we'll say about that. But like, look, I don't know and don't care about the rationale how you created that idea that they're gonna be, it's gonna be a 3D model of their own mouth. But I do what I do like about this idea is that there's gonna be, there's gonna be some positive feedback loops in there where either a mistake or something that they do right will be amplified by having it mirror directly back at them.

Exactly. Right. And they'll take that sign as, oh, you like that, do you? And then they'll do it more to the point where if it's the right thing to do, it'll now become the wrong thing. It'll be too much. You like a bit of tongue, do you? You think it could be a kind of a toxic feedback loop?

Well, no, I didn't say that because there's also the part where, you know, if you're doing the wrong thing, doing a bit more of it could fix it. Yeah, right. So there are some circumstances where it's not necessarily toxic, it's healthy. Well, what I think it will do is it lead to people... Like, my initial thought was it will hopefully help to iron out the ex-interestities in youthful, enthusiastic kissing, right? Yeah.

But I think what you're suggesting to me is actually it will drive people further and further into their own kissing niches. Yeah. And soon will evolve to the point where, you know, it's, you'll become radicalized basically into, you'll, you'll radicalize yourself to a point where your kissing technique is so bizarre and unusual that you won't be able to be kissed by anybody else. And there's gonna be,

this is gonna be like after the Cambrian, the Cambrian mass extinction. There's gonna be an explosion. An explosion in kiss, new kiss diversity. Right, all these new kissing types that will become available then, because I guess if there's a mouth replica, it means that there's probably a computer involved

in some way, right? Yes, I said it was able to tweak. Yeah, you'll probably be able to tweak way. Yes. Yeah, I said it was a tweak. Yeah, you'll probably be able to tweak it. Yes. And I don't just mean the nipples. While you're kissing this sentient robot. And so you'll be able to go, you know, you know, it'll be like when whoever Casper of thought you know like fought blue blue That deep blue chest computer deep blue or whatever like that suddenly we're playing against Deep tongue a eyes deep tongue like a eye that that has never kissed before and is only learning from the kiss data from looking at at the rules of kissing,

and it's playing in new ways, and it's teaching people to kiss in new ways. French kissing will seem. It will seem so quite. We'll be deeply embarrassed. We'll see you soon. Nobody, nobody, here's something nobody does. I guarantee there's a lot of weird shit on the internet, but nobody does this.

Nobody licks the lips of the other person. And I don't know why. Feels like that would be a very, that mathematically that fits perfectly into the kissing universe, the existing kissing universe. Nobody does it. Nobody licks. I don't think anybody looks, I don't think anybody looks sort of like a dog drinking from a ball. Like, but I could imagine that

the tongue might occasionally brush. Nobody is never been done. The lips are in totally. You know what people don't do. Look, I'm going to name something that people don't do. People don't get their teeth on the other side of each other's teeth and interlock their their upper and lower jaws. On the other side. So is this a? Right, so you're biting down and then and then your your tongue is either if it still comes out of your mouth Then it was either looking above the person's lip and then the other person is

out of your mouth, then it was either looking above the person's lip and then the other person is looking below your lip, your bottom lip. Now, Alistair, I'm going to leave you in a real nightmare scenario here where my son is obviously still awake, has come and has started knocking on my door and I think Carly is outside. I'm going to leave you by yourself for 10 seconds while I go and put him back to bed, okay? No problem. You can carry this one side of the kissing conversation.

I've got no problem. So let me take you guys there. Yeah, I think that kissing will probably advance in a number of ways. Here's my predictions for the next 20 years of kissing. I think teeth are going to come back in. I think teeth have been out for a long time, and I think that's a... that's due to fear that was created in the 80s because of ultra-sharp. One of those things called that you get on your teeth there, metal, you know, metal braids, not braids, but braces.

Yeah, so I think now that brace technology has become safer to the tongue, I think teeth are going to make a big comeback. I think people are going to do that thing with a run, run, or, you know, at the moment, I think people only do that as a joke. They run their tongue along the teeth. You know, when they're kissing somebody in those early stages of dating in a sort of an experiment to just try all sorts of things and you're both laugh, you go,

oh, that's a weird sensation. Well, soon that's the exact kind of sensations. People will be, people will be going for. I think, I think we're gonna, you know, I think, you know, I think in terms of new places that the tongue will go, I think, on the side of the mouth along the side cheek, I think, you know, that's, that's sort of unexplored area and soon that will be, you know, one person will sort of keep their jaw closed but open their lips up. And the love just allow you to put your tongue from one side of the mouth to the other in between

the teeth and the cheek, like that. And I think that's it. I'm just trying to make my Andy your back. Yeah, I'm very back. And I'm loving what I'm here. I'm making predictions, making my predictions I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. tablets for food instead of food. Yeah. No, but and yet none of them predicted the internet.

None of them predicted the things that are actually the biggest revolutions in. Yeah. You can be. And you know what? Yes. I reckon here's my thinking. I reckon maybe because of some ear, nose, and throat doctors take talk account, who teaches a mass of the youth about how the ear, nose, and throat are all connected.

I think the nose is going to come into play in kissing. Incredible. And it's going to be used as the, you know, because to think that there's two kissing orifices right there that that are just aren't being used. And they bring in a new flavor, they bring in the salty. This is really unpleasant. Because, because the, because the, you know,

it's got a salt, you know, it's sort of like salt water. I don't know what it is, but, so I think people are gonna bring that in. And then, of course the ear. The ear's always been in a little bit with the nibbling on the ear. Oh, the nibbling.

But that's just wiping the feet on the mat. That's not going itself. No, not going inside, but now, now that we know that it's all connected, essentially you're kissing the inner air canal When you're putting your throat down there, you know Down their throat putting your tongue down their throat not your throat down their throat. Oh Yeah, good stuff good stuff. This is what I you know I

I Think can absolutely picture a clickhole listicle about 10 things to watch out for in kissing in the next 15 years. And absolutely. Nobody, nobody, not in the futuristic world is, because I tell you what it is, I think a lot of people who should be focusing on ways to make physical interaction between humans more interesting have got really caught up in tech, you know, and they're all like, well,

it's all gonna be done with sex robots and that sort of thing. And nobody's going back to the drawing board and just working out the ways to work with what we've got and make that really make it sing. Here's a headline that I do. I will pick, I can't imagine we'll make an appearance in the next 30 years. In sex news. It will be, um, teeth are now in when it comes to blow jobs. They used to be the greatest taboo. But now they're the latest craze. Yeah. Yeah. Great. And all teeth blow job. I think that's a great idea. And then you could actually just do it at the dentist. Okay.

Well, while the dentist is, you know, it's like you just get your individual cubicle. You get your individual cubicle in the waiting room, but they just leave you one of those little denture things. Yeah. And then you just do it yourself. You just chew. You just get the denture, use it like a puppet, and you just chew. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, I can absolutely see medical establishments beginning to complete, complete with each other in terms of the waiting room experience. And because for too long, it's been, they've settled for mild interest as you are. Sorry. Now, Kali is looking for something desperately.

I'm going to see if I can help her. Sorry, Elneste. Well, while Andy's gone, please allow me to talk about what I think the future of waiting rooms will be. There's obviously a huge gap in the market there for a good-weighting room. We've seen magazines up until this point, but why not iPads? Of course, that's just the beginning. I mean, water slides seems a bit excessive.

But, you know, let's see. A pre-consultation, I think that would be nice. You know, if you had a room to yourself, maybe with, I think a one person waiting room. I know I've already mentioned this with the biting the penis thing, but I think a one person waiting room is where it's the ultimate luxury.

You go in there, it's, you get a booth, you know, like when you go to a rock ability, you know, Berk or joint, get a booth, maybe somebody on roller skates, rolls over with an iPad, and they do a pre medical appointment interview. Maybe while massaging your feet, unless that's what's injured or infected or something. But you know what? I hear that if you've got infected feet, then if they've got infected hands,

then that cancels out. So people with infected hands can then that cancels out. So people with infected hands can massage people with infected feet. So they get people with the opposite illness to come and interview you? With the same illness, but it infected had the opposite. Well, I think an infected hand is the opposite of an infected foot. Yeah, you're right. You're right.

Because, or else it's a healthy hand, is the opposite of an infected foot. But we both know that that's not true, and the end that that wasn't working. That doesn't, that doesn't, there is a part of the brain that is designed to scan opposites for their opposites and that mine is absolutely not pinging. I'd like to apologise to the to the listeners day for this being the most interrupted podcast of all time but just then one of our children had disappeared from his bed but for the first time ever he decided to take himself to the bathroom. And that was all it was. So it's exciting times here.

That's very exciting. And to think that we almost recorded in person with each other. Yes, in the studio, in blissful bliss. But yeah, it sounded like you really nailed the personalized waiting room experience there. That was, you know, more or less where I was going, that it's going to become a thing where it is. I think it does really do. You know, open the wall where they get more and more relaxing and or enjoyable. And I can totally see a dental surgery saying that you are allowed to use the dentures to pleasure yourself.

Give yourself a blowjob. Yeah. A newvo, a newvo blowjob. A newvo BJ. But I mean, I could see, I think, I mean, there is a sketch in a war of the waiting rooms where they get more and more comfortable, but then eventually, what happens is they start getting so comfortable they become really uncomfortable. Yeah, I think so.

Well, you know, people do rebel against that kind of, that kind of thing and you start to look for something a bit more edgy. You know, and I guess there is a risk as well to making the waiting rooms to enjoyable that people go for unnecessary surgeries, unnecessary dental surgeries. And so on. That's a good idea.

Just to enjoy the waiting part. That's the only way you want, isn't it? It's like you got those and those engineers who worked on keeping people in looking at Facebook But you get them there into the dental surgery Yes, because because dentistry is historically, you know, the dentuses historically a place people don't want to go and people feel scared Now it's They've they've put so much more so much of their dental money into getting people dangerously addicted to

To it You really tired? No, no. You said to just trail an awful bit. Because I think there's a lot of those people who take the opportunity when it's a hot day to just go to the malls, just to take advantage of the air conditioning. Yes. You see, but there's a lot of businesses that could be getting some of that market share. You know, and it's a hot day. It's long. We'll all go to the dentist get a tooth out. They keep the air caught on.

Well, that's the thing. And is that if you, if you can sell to them, they don't have to spend too much money right now. Yes. You know? And so, if you have a long payment plan or if you can just get it so that it's mostly covered by Medicare and then the gap, whatever it is that you have to pay on top, isn't too bad, you know, less than the cost of a movie ticket. Then yeah, that's, you know, a good long procedure, a good route canal. I mean, you're looking at

it, you know, well over an hour of just blissful cool. Cool. Nice comfy comfy seat. Lie back. That reclining thing. Oh boy. Ritz and spit. Yeah, and also maybe opiates. And indeed, maybe opiates. When you, when you, you know, I get a match, I would go to the dentist and say, oh, no anesthetic for me today. Tell you what, give the next person double, just paying it forward. Sort of like in a bar going, send that drink over to the other. Something for my friend over there.

Yeah. One injection of pain killer for my friend over there, in their, in their gums. Is there Is there is how could we turn that into something? like I've been there are no that's the thing. There is no group dentistry scenario. The dentistry is bit You know, I mean, I think that's in I think that's in the in the in the polatial waiting room. What do you mean?

You're in the waiting room at the dentists and people are sitting in these beautiful lounge chairs. They're dressed in suits. They've got, you know, they've got a little like canopies being served to them. Oh, perfect thing. Just before you go to the dentist. Nice little bit of fish.

Nice little, why? A bit of sushi. That sea weed's got a really stick to your teeth. Had the raw salmon. It's just going to make your breath just, oh, perfect. Andy, it sounds counterintuitive, right? But think about this.

Shouldn't the dentist be the place where you could eat the most messy of foods? Oh, you're absolutely right. They should be able to clean your mouth better than anyone. You're right, this is gonna be guilt-free. It's actually on the day when you're gonna go to the dentist. That's the day to really experiment

with eating some of the stickiest things that you can imagine. Paint, bitch, you're getting the clean anyway. You might as well get your money's worth. A tablespoon of molasses. Right before you go in there. Yeah, a toffee apple. Mm-hmm. Awesome red skins. Right before you go in there. Yeah, a toffee apple.

Awesome red skins. Oh, that probably shouldn't be called red skins anymore. You go into the dentist and you just have a mouth full of food. And you say, I'm not going to swallow it. I want you to clean it out of my mouth. You've just chewed a toffee apple, a spoonful of edgy mite, and let's see, a fistful of chia seeds. You just leave them, you don't swallow,

you leave them loose in your mouth, and you say, you're getting, I'm paying for this. I want you to clean it out, all out with that little scratchy pick thing. And that's where the dentists, that's their mistake in charging a flat rate for that cleaning fee. But if they're gonna do it,

if they're gonna make that mistake, then you absolutely should take advantage of that. Absolutely. And then they're going to have to change it to a car washing model where it's premium standard and whatever. You're right. It's going to be an all-you-can-eat version, but you have to pay considerably more. If you want the all- can clean, all you can

write that. Right. But they probably have like a really powerful hose or something like that. They can just shoot it into your mouth. For big jobs. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. You know, high pressure hose just allows them to just kind of get a good first, you know,

clean over like that. Maybe they could put like a little, I think a little plastic thing at the back of your mouth that blocks up your holes. So they can just really, so they can really just go, Psh, they see. What they do is they strap you to the chair, right?

They strap you down. The chair flips up, now you're facing the ground. There's a drain right below you and they actually plug two high pressure hoses into both of your ears and they take advantage of that ear nose throat connection and they blast through and from the back and slush you out that way. from the back and slush you out that way. It's not pleasant. But do you think that the nose stuff is connected to ear wax in some way? Like is it a similar product that's just watered down? It's not the set... No, it's absolutely not. It feels like a fundamentally different type of liquid. Like the ear wax is waxy, it's oily.

It's... I know, but I'm talking about it being watered down. Like I mean, you don't get watery things by watering down oily things. I know, but okay, let's took you took a little half a spoonful, half a teaspoon of of ear wax and you put it into a peachy dish. Yeah. Right. And then you got a little bit of brine, a little bit of like saline solution, saline solution and put it in there and then you just mixed it. Yeah. For a bit. Right. What would that be? That's just... What would that be? It would be snott.

Absolutely. It is not snott. It would go from a deep orange. It would be like a deep orange to a light yellowy golden kind of color. No, they're fundamentally different things. They'd be on different aisles in the paint shop. One is oil-based, one is water-based, and they can't be, you can't get one by diluting the other. There's no way that anything in the body is purely oil-based with no water in it. That's what it is. It's purely oil-based. It's a biofuel, it's closer to It's a biofuel, it's closer to, closer to diesel than it is to, to snob. It's the end, yeah.

No, you're absolutely wrong about that. Is there, have I seen somewhere? Is there such a thing as a near wax candle? Or is that just the thing from like a, a, it's in Shrek, but there's a Shrek candle. But there's that figure of canaling your ears, so you're getting confused. There is the very real thing of doing ear canaling. No, but that's not what I'm thinking.

If I'm talking about making candles from earwax, but I think I am just saying what I saw in Shrek. But, I mean, just because you saw it in Shrek, Alistair, doesn't mean there isn't somebody out there who has collected all their earwax throughout their life and turned it into a account. Do you want me to Google whether or not you could make a candle out of your wax? I mean, it must be quite a thing in candle making circles.

Can you make a candle? And the first thing that comes up with is out of earwax. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha EWACs is secreted in the EFA cleansing antimicrobial and for lubricative purposes. It was never designed for making candles. According to Quora. Well, that's silly. Very well put. Looks like mythbusters tried to make an EWACs candle. I'm not going to watch this video, but I don't know.

Oh, no, it's always a good thing when once we start hitting some mythbusters stuff, it means that we're on the right track. Yeah. We're in, yeah, we're in territory where a show is made by people who look like us already answering this question. They don't really look like us. One of them looks a bit like me. The other one. I guess, yeah, you look like Adam Savage I don't really look like us. One of them looks a bit like me. The other one.

I guess, yeah, you look like Adam Savage, don't you? Well, I think we, I think actually Adam Savage is probably a pretty good average between you and I. Like, yeah, I think he's, I think if you, if you make this as much like you. It's crazy. It's just a... That's not true.

I mean, you are somebody who reacts to people saying somebody looks like you, and unless they, you, you react to that by saying, what? Is it someone with glasses? And that is, that is exactly what you do here. This is a blonde guy with glasses and a beard who works with his hands and likes to make jokes and stuff. And has also come up with similar ideas to what we're talking about.

You're right. He's like me, but fun, talented, rich and old. All the things you wish you were. Yep, the biggest three, triple threat. Do you think I'm like the walrus guy in this show? I was sure, actually actually God damn it. Yeah, yeah, you that's that was my that was my hasty

mapping was that you were the wall rescuer. Yeah. That that moustache has got to got to become a thing for Nietzsche moustache. Can't believe the hips just didn't go there. Yeah, it's hard. It's hard. Anyway, look, we need to find some steps.

How many things have we written down now? Well, I've actually written down four things, but most of them are dentist related. That's fine. This is the dentistry. This is the dentistry episode. This is the oral fixation episode. Was that an album by Mariah Carey? Oral Fixed-Eat-Wait, Mariah. I hope I'm wrong. I think it's a Freudian thing right? No well it's it refers to children

no it refers to children wanting to put everything in their mouths when they're young just to like to to as a an additional way of sensing things more intensely but I think Freud might have named that. Okay. Maybe. Our fixation album is Shakira was oral fixation. She had volume one and two. And here we go. Look, I type in oral fixation. First thing comes up in Freudian psychology. Oral fixation is caused by the unmet oral needs in early childhood. This creates persistent need for oral stimulation,

causing negative oral behaviors, like smoking and nail bite in adulthood. Though this theory is well known. It has received criticism from modern psychology. It does sound like bullshit. Yeah. Yeah. Unmet oral needs. Are you tackling your child's mouth enough?

Are you prodding at it with a wide enough variety of implements and textured objects? Because if you're not, you are setting them up for a life of smoking. And you messed me up, mum and dad. You didn't prod me with various things in my mouth while I was a baby. My doctor told me.

I mean, Freud, good on him. He just, I think he started out as a neuroscientist and that he got frustrated because they literally, you know, he, because it all felt like they couldn't actually test anything, right? And so he went into psychology where you can't test anything. But that's built into it, I suppose. And you just make shit up. Oh, God, I'd love to get in at the start of a field when there are no, there are no boundaries, no rules, and everything is fair game. Any dumb shit that you say, you put, give it a later in the sketch and you're in.

I think there is a sketch in people coming home from sessions with Freud and arguing with their parents about their failures when they raised them. Yes. Because of all this crazy shit that he said. Like this, could you imagine coming home after a session and being so angry with your parents that they didn't satisfy your oral needs when you were a baby? And then do you, do you then emotionally blackmail them into satisfying your oral needs now

by poking you in the mouth with things, by providing a large enough variety of... I guess you could be like, well, yeah, it's like what I've spoken to, to Lucius, Lucian, what's his name? Lucius? No, that was Sigmund. Lucius Freud was his nephew, he was the artist. Who was that artist, right? Yeah. Yeah, sorry, Sigmund, Lucius Freud was his nephew, he was the artist. Was that artist, right?

Yeah. Yeah, sorry. Sigmund. And then they get together with Sigmund. Sigmund says that you got to put some stuff in my mouth. Yeah, your mum has, like, she's got a new hat. And you're like, can I nibble on that? And she's like, no, of course you can't nibble on my hat. You're like, well, my psychiatrist says,

segment that you didn't let me nibble on enough things when I was a child, so you have to make me, let me nibble on it now and then she lets you. Have I made you less interested in this sketch now, having described it like that now? No, no, I was just having to write it down. No, yes, in fact, if anything, it was too good. It was too good, Andy, and I started laughing

on the inside and outside. I wonder if you could laugh on your inside by maybe making some of your inner sphinters, like the one that goes controls passage from this throat into the stomach, make that sort of flap open and shut. And I just think that there must be other ways of producing sound. And I'd love to be able to regain control of some of those unconscious internal processes and put them to a greater variety of uses. There is those times when you consider bubbles that go up and through into your guts that

make a lot of noise, right? This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now. You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising. But what if you could be saving money by switching to Progressive? Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average, and auto-customers qualify for an average of seven discounts. Multitask right now.

Quote today at Progressive.com. Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, national average 12 month savings of $744 by new customer surveyed who saved with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary. Discount is not available in all safe and situations. I think that would take things to the next level. Absolutely. But also I had this idea and I'm sorry this is an outside idea. But this is kind of based on one time somebody giving somebody, somebody I know, giving somebody I know a gift that was a book that said that was like

For Christmas as a gift that was like dressing for your shape Right and it was such an it feels like such an insult essentially saying you know, you don't dress for your shape or whatever. Yeah, yeah, and your shape. And like even, even to suggest that somebody has a shape that is complicated enough that you need a manual in order to dress for it is not a pleasing thing. Yeah. It's not a pleasing thing. I've friend of mine got given a book.

I saw a relative sister, somebody, gave him a book that was along the lines of how to talk to people. Or like... Well, it's great to have... Or maybe it was how to talk to family members. I like it, and I'm like, oh, this feels really cruel. Well this is exactly what the idea is, is that it's books that are like, how to not be

a jerk to your housemates. And then what you and me do is we just, we start a podcast. So it's just, so it's just you and me going, like, this is how we write it, right? Because we want to have some content in the book so that it's not just a cover. But basically we go, you know, we start a podcast by going, here's how you do, here's how you don't be a jerk to your housemates. And then we just start a conversation like that. And then we just take that audio, transcribe it through some app,

and then put it straight into a work doc and, and then just put it up on a website, you know, with the cover for sale so that people can give these jerk presents to pick book presents. And we'll take requests and we'll do, you know, we'll record for an hour or whatever. We'll talk for it exactly like a full book. It's going to, we guarantee that the book will be full of shit that is vaguely related to that

topic. And so it is a legitimate book. It is a book as a cover and stuff. Yeah, the least you can do when you're making a book is... I feel like a full write amount of pages. Print the write amount of pages so that there's not a bunch of blank pages at the end. You just don't print more pages than you really need. I think that is really funny. But in general, I just love the idea of personalized jerk books. Really like, it's very specifically obnoxious. And you're doing it entirely for the head didn't, right, for the front cover. Because that's the joke. That is the joke and the inside is just so that the joke is backed up by something. Yes, so it could be something like how to not leave the back door open all the

fucking time, right? Yes, the name of the book. And then we talk and talk and the book is really thick, right? And it gives the book a really good back. The great thing is about that book is really thick, right? And it gives the book a lot of detail about this. The great thing is about that book is you can actually use it to prop the door open. And it talks about exercises that you could do to keep your arms strong so that you could push doors close or leave them open. Yeah, a mental routines that you can go through. Mantras that you can have. We go into a lot of detail about this. I also think a book called How to Give Better Gifts is a great stocking stuffer. Absolutely. Maybe think about who you're giving the gift to.

Oh, be great at the Christmas handing out of gifts. If you could always just have that one copy of how to give better gifts, pre-wrapped. Okay. And you just, you make sure that people give you their gift first before you give them the gift that you've got for them. And then you have that like up your sleeve, I guess almost like one of those things that dispenses aces in an old-style card game that like if they give you a gift you open it and it's shit straight away, you've got a copy of how to give better gifts already wrapped.

That's the thing. It's already wrapped. So you from their point of view, it's like how it seems like you couldn't possibly have given it to them in like in response to the shit gift that they've given you. Of course. And clearly. And it avoids any awkward conversations about how you're unhappy with the gift. It avoids all conversations from that, that forward on. That person will never don't think again. I just think quality gift giving is a great skill to have for life. That's right. That wasn't in reference to this particular gift that you gave me today. And I love this big vanilla folder holder.

Yeah, awesome. How to give better gifts, I think, is a, maybe even a separate sketch idea. maybe even a separate sketch idea I'll stay. Sure, I mean, it's a, it's very close. No, all right. All right. I thought I got it over the line with my little idea to have it shoot out via sleeve on a little spring, but. Oh. I, I didn't hear that, but.

That's okay. I think. I mean, God. But is this your idea of new sketch ideas? You just deliver them in a slightly different way through using technology to strap to your body? Yeah, I think so. I mean, I'm trying to think of...

a way to do that with greeting cards or gift cards or something like that, or birthday cards, you know, like because in a card game, right, it's always good to have a card up your sleeve, you know, it is good to have a nice hidden up your sleeve that you can pull out and win the game of cards, the card game that you're playing. But in a way, isn't all life a card game where we play with greeting cards, and the way that you win is by remembering to give one person a greeting card when they didn't remember to give you one. And that's why having something whereby you always do have a greeting card up your sleeve that has a generic sentiment that you've prewritten into it that is broad

enough that it could apply to anyone and that you can shoot out of the end of your sleeve into your hand. I don't, this is the tricky part. I don't know how you write the name of the person. Yeah, that's the part that's tough, Andy. Because for them to receive it and go, oh, a generic card from somebody who's, how thoughtful. But I guess you can just go into the bathroom. Exactly.

But then, yeah, which slightly defeats the purpose of it shooting out of your sleeve, but I still think you could, but you could operate that. You could lock it back in. What do you mean? You could lock and load it back in to your sleeve after you get it out and right on it. Yeah, okay, but then you don't need it up your sleeve at all. You just give it to them, right? The shooting out of your sleeve is just so that you can always be able to produce it. Well, I know, but that's still what you're doing.

It's like you've got it there. It's just so that you don't have to carry it I guess in your bag or pocket or whatever. You're right, that is it. The forearm is a great place that doesn't really crease because it doesn't fall. I reckon it would be possible. I think you can overcome the fact that you don't have

the person's name written on there, by just being overly loving in the text. If you write something insufficiently effusive and endearing terms, it's the kind of thing where like, if you're giving a card to your wife, you shouldn't have to write your wife's name in there for her to know that it's for you. You just write such loving things that- So what- what- what term will you use? That will encapsulate all people. Gorgeous beloved. Gorgeous beloved. Here you go boss. Gorgeous, beloved. Well, then you can, you can, you can play it off as a bit of a jockey, a jockey thing

that you do with your boss, you know, you say that you're loving sexual harassment, a bit of a jockey thing or do with my boss. I, you, Alistair, you have correctly interpreted my sentiment. Alistair, you have correctly interpreted my sentiment. Look, it's locked in the sleeve, and that's what makes this one different. No, no, that's what makes this one different is this is done with greeting cards. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh yeah, sorry. You. Oh, right, right, right, right, right, right, can't. No, no, no, I forgot. I mean, okay, greeting cards locked in sleeve. Well, that's a different one, Andy. That's a complete, that's what it is.

That's what I'm telling you. No, but initially you said that that was the gift, how to give better gifts book that was locked in your sleeve, right? That's what I was writing that down for. Mate, you watching me for the changes. The fact that you're doing bloody U-turns, left and wrong, is, you know, whatever. We've got at least five ideas here, Andy. So I'm going to take us to three words from a listener. I don't know if you know this, Andy, but we have listeners.

And some of them donate to our Patreon, and the $3 people, will they? They can, no, I'm certain to think maybe. That's what we call them. We call them $3 people. $3 people, these $3 people. I'm certain I wonder whether I've already done this one actually.

Oh, no. Double dipping. This today's listener is Alex Lloyd. Alex Lloyd. Yeah. The singer of that song amazing. Yeah, I think it could be. Hey Alex, how you going? Alex, thank you so much.

You've not been active for very long. I bet I imagine Alex is still gigging right? You know, I'm a pandemic Are you saying that he just doesn't care about his health or That's right. He can't be stopped Yeah, I guess okay Anyway, Alex has sent in three words. The first one is a bit green. Do you want to try and is that, might I let you give you hints like that?

A bit green, verdant. Yeah, do you want, hey? Verdant. I still don't know what that word is. Verdant, it's a word meaning green. Verdent? Yeah. No.

From the French. No, the first... Vire? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's not that. It's crocodile. Oh, crocodile. Okay.

Larin, doc, larin. Well, from the French crocodile deal. Yes. Larin, larin, jaritus? Oh, do I know about that, Andy? Oh, is that the second word you guess? crunch crocodile deal. Yes. Laryn, Laryn Jotas? Oh, do I know about that, Andy? Yeah. Oh, is that the second word you guessed? Yeah.

You're saying something, some fact about crocodiles that I didn't know. Um, no trousers. Crocodile trousers? We have, we have not had this question. We have not had this question. These letters, these words. Crockettale. Okay. And then was the third word.

A crocodile trousers contraption. I think you ended on the right letter. I don't have one more go. That's really encouraging. Man. Crockettale trousers man. No, no, the that's not it at all It's crocodile trousers revolution Fantastic this is these are beautiful beautiful words Alex. I'm really sorry that we I mean I'm hoping you're from overseas and you've never heard of the musician Alex Lloyd and so that wasn't a noxious and annoying Yeah, I'm here and I could imagine it's endlessly and so that wasn't a noxious and annoying acknowledge that you're from here. I could imagine it's endlessly tiresome. Endlessly tiresome.

But anyway, moving on, I think crocodile triad transfer revolution fills me with so much joy already. And it makes me realize that I've never seen anybody attempt crocodile proof trousers. As a concept, you'd think that in Australia, we'd all be wearing them. You know, it would be something that you would wade in water with. Mm. Mm. And I, you know, it, you're initial instinct is that, well, then they would just be more or less steel tubes, right? You might have to sacrifice the bending of the knee. steel tubes, right? You might have to sacrifice the bending of the knee, but...

Like Ned Kelly's, like Ned Kelly decided to make pants. Even if Ned Kelly started getting into pants, all right, started getting into a pair of pants, but he started making pants off of the success of his helmet. And I guess there's a slot, there's a Ned Kelly type slot at the top that you can urinate through, like his eye hole. Yeah. And maybe even shoot through. Yeah. Yeah. Shoot through. They still keep your gun by your, I guess it depends on whether or not you want

your gun exposed to the crock or you want to end with your valuables. There may be other ways to build pants to make them crocodile proof. Would it be useful to have pants that inflate it suddenly? A line of clothing. Sorry? Oh yeah, you're right. Ned Kelly building, other clothing is absolutely a sketch idea. Yeah.

If he hadn't been killed at Glen Rowan, at the siege at Glen Rowan, he wasn't going on to do. He was hung in Melbourne. You're absolutely right. If he hadn't been killed at the CG Glen Rowan, which he wasn't, what else? What else? But it is amazing to me that he's the only person in popular culture that I can think of who has like like a personal armor style who like you tried to innovate any kind of like a lot of people

getting shot at and he's the only one I can think of who's like I'm gonna build a big metal head. There was that guy who tried to make a bear proof suit. Really? How'd that go? I think there's a whole documentary on him. He's like, you see him getting hit by logs and stuff like that in the suit. I'm not sure if he dies. I don't think it's the same movie as Grizzly Man. So I think this guy might have succeeded, I'm not sure. Maybe it's impossible to be entirely bare proof, because I guess they could just hang around while you just lay on the ground and they wait for you

to eventually come out. Mm. I think nowadays, it would have got to the point of like we'd have a kele's would be like a hot kouture brand, just like Chanel or something like that and there'd be The entire range. I mean, oh god the this this is a thing a Ned Kelly Deodorant spray thing like like that helmet Translates perfectly to a deodorant bottle or like a I guess a perfume

to a deodorant bottle or like a, or, or, I guess a perfume ball where it sprays out of the little slot in the top of the helmet. Like, maybe a brown perfume. A brown perfume. Ah! They're a beautiful smell of brown. You know, like, you know, I think there's, most, this is the flaw with, I guess, most perfumes, is that when you spray them on, you can't see where the perfume is on.

Where you've sprayed. Yeah. But what about one that makes it look like you got rust running down your neck? It's fantastic. It's not as good an idea. Well, the only other flaw is that you can't imagine Ned Kelly being inside a big, big metal costume, smelling all that good, like it doesn't... No, that's true.

...doesn't immediately line up, but then, you know, bit of smell of gunpowder. Everyone likes to smell a gunpowder. Um, leather, gunpowder and leather. Well, maybe we need to, like, change it so that bads, you know, like bad liquids on our body. Maybe if, you know, like, sort of just, just rancid crotch smell, maybe that should just turn brown. What?

What? Maybe bad smells should have more color to them so that you could see them coming. I got to say I'm not I'm not so keen on this like I feel like I have. It's hard enough being somebody with whose body does make bad smells and feeling that you know, you got to conceal it. You got to you got to you got to work on concealing the smell, but then also to have the visual element. Deodorant then would also have to incorporate

a skin-colored spray paint to not only mask the smell, but also mask the color of the smell. You'd have to like, and have to come in a range of different skin tones, and you could spray. Yeah, you're right, I apologize. But, you know, there's nothing to stop us marketing a deodorant that is also a spray paint

that does also, you know, I guess spray on tan or something like that. Yeah. You know, we could make one that is everything, right? It's a deodorant, it's a hair spray and it's a spray on tan. You could sell one that sort of puts a racing stripe on the side of your body. Yeah. And also kills bugs. It's also an insect repellent and a sun's deep in it.

It's everything in a can. I feel like people would buy this. Yeah. I mean, if it was, and if it was instead of in a can, it was like one of those little balls with a wick sticking out of it, like a tiny little bomb, old school cartoon bomb. Yeah. But maybe about the size that one that fits in your fist and you just go into this dome, the deodor dome, right? And you just light it and you just shut your eyes,

put your fingers in your ears, close your mouth. Dead, dead at night, the deodorant. Dead night and then everything in your body's covered. Yeah, you go in there and then you just... Yeah, and then you get up and go about your day. I think that would be exciting. No, also act to wake you up. Yes, it really is everything.

I like it. The deodor bomb? The all-in-one deodor bomb. It's an entire morning routine. deodor bomb. The all-in-one deodor bomb. It's an entire morning routine in a bomb. I mean, it's not a crocodile trousers revolution, but we do have Ned Kelly releases a line of metal clothing. Yeah, metal clothing and then subsequent odors. And then the deodor bomb. Yeah, yeah, metal clothing and then subsequent And then on the deodor palm. Yeah I love it. I deodorant that that comes nobody's made a deodorant that whether can is a little gun

Had no way that you comes as a squirt it onto yourself is by shooting yourself in the in the armpit Nobody's done that That's good. Yeah That is just good. You could even get your wife to do it or let your kids shoot you in the armpit. You know, I don't know, kids want to shoot me in the armpit. Do you get your son involved in spraying on your deodorant now? Get him to...

No, I use a roll on. I think that would be... Well, that would be weirder. That's fun to do. But if it was a gun, I think I'd let my kid, you know what I mean? I feel weird exposing kids to roll on deodorant. But if it's a gun, I'll let them shoot it at me.

It's fun. It's fun. So thank you, Alex Lloyd. Sorry if it was nowhere near Crocodile. But such good words. I mean, we could come back to that every week and never begin to scratch the surface. It's true. it's true. Which is actually the guarantee that it says on my brand new crocodile trousers line, crocodile trousers. I mean, I think it's the way it says they won't even scratch the surface. Because they're just made a cloth. Yeah. And for them to cut into my leg like that would be, I mean, I think some of these Ned Cully ones would scratch the surface. Yeah, that's why. Well, hang on.

I don't want to give you tennis. Here's the sketch I did for today. Mouth replica kiss training in advancements. This is the youth of tomorrow, of tomorrow year. They learned kissing by kissing themselves. By kissing themselves with these advanced 3D replicas of their own mouths. But then later on, who knows?

Maybe AI improved mouths as well. Maybe they'll learn to kiss other things. Maybe this is what hell is. Hell is. Hell is having to kiss yourself. Now, but think about it first. First you'd learn your practice on a mouth. But then you practice on anything that's concave with a protrusion coming out. Like satellite dish. I learned to kiss, but kissing a satellite dish. A ladle with some knocky in there. You know, is this a cup cup 10 holding a giant marble? This seems like like if the Bradman, the Donald Bradman,

Australia's greatest cricketer of kissing. This is how he would have learned to kiss because Bradman famously learned to become such a good batsman by using a fence parling to hit a golf ball against a water tank, right? And you could become the world's greatest kisser by, you know, using your tongue to poke around a bit of knocky in a soup ladle. In a soup ladle or, or by trying to kiss a golf ball inside a water tank. There you go.

Then we got War of the Waiting rooms. This is once people realize that the waiting room was the one place that we haven't improved in about 75 years. And suddenly there's an arms race on who can create the most comfortable and welcoming waiting rooms. Who is working on the pre-medical technology? A lot of breakthroughs in medical technology. That's right.

But that's not everything that happens in a surgical environment. And then there's another sketch which is companies like dentists getting into trying to capture some of this market of people who go to supermarkets and malls just for the air conditioning by creating specifically organized pricing plans that you there's no pay now It's all paid later and people get lots of dental work just for the fuck of it Tell you what you pay a fuck load to go to the dentist and you pay a lot for medical care and that sort of thing and You pay a fuckload to go to the dentist and you pay a lot for medical care and that sort of thing. And they are putting absolutely none of that money back into replacing the children's books

in the little children play area in the corner. Those are always the scumiest, most disgusting, torn up old weathered pieces of shit. These toys that just do not function at all. No. A lot of them are like McDonald's, you know, happy meal toys. They're just creating all the flame and everything of every child that's ever been through there. Anyway.

Then we got a, this is a pain killing injection in the gum for my friend over here. This is a, I don't know, a generous potential lover in the slick dental waiting room. I don't know what exactly it's going to say. I also do like the idea of like a big, big open open an open plan dentist where they don't have you know like they don't have the individual little rooms that you're going to it's all done in a big kind of warehouse environment where you can sort of make eye contact with other dent you know other patients and and you can order order little little things for them off the menu of the cart.

order little things for them, off the menu, off the cart. I think that's great. They should have yum cha. Mm. Nice. I mean, yeah, I mean, in a way, while you're getting, like, while you're getting your dentistry done, that's still a waiting room for you.

That's right. You know, like, you're just sitting there waiting. You're not doing anything. You should. So it may as well just all be the same room. Then we got Freud's patient going home and going off at their parents for their, for the, not letting them, not letting them oral fixate enough on things or shove on enough things in their mouth while they were a baby.

Then we got how to dress for your shape style jerk books. Then we got how to give... Oh, you got about jerk books. Yeah, how to give better gifts to separate ones because it's locked and loaded and someone's sleep. I wasn't, I backed down on wanting that, it did be a separate thing. What I wanted was my greeting card idea. Once I give in, once I give in to your demands Andy, it's written down, I don't have an eraser here, I'm not, where you, you're using white out and then we got greeting cards locked

in the sleeve as well. But that's a generic greeting card for that you can write to my dearest beloved. Give it to anybody, it works for anyone. Give it to anybody and then we have Ned Kelly releasing a line of metal clothing. This is when he doesn't die, but then his family kind of carries it on, they become basically like the Versacees. It is probably, you know, the only breakthrough in clothing, like clothing innovation that I can point to, that is specifically Australian.

I don't know if they're there if we've done anything else and yet we didn't follow it up. Yeah that's true it's it's just it was a real dead end. That's right. I guess when people thought people thought oh well they can't stop bullets because there's gaps in it. We'll stop but nobody tried to just use it for clothing. Pivot pivot baby. And then we got the deodor bomb. Ah, love the deodor bomb. Well, I guess we can do this song thing and then wrap this up. Let me have absolutely that. Let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, the, let the, let the, let the, the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, let the, the, let the, let the, let the Maybe I have been tired this episode. Still, still. We did it.

You could still be tired Andy. That's OK. Thank you so much for listening. We really do appreciate it. I am stupid old Andy on Twitter. You can follow me there. I'm an Alistair TV. You can follow us to intake.

You can like us on Facebook and support us on Patreon. You can write us a review. You can just send us an email. Somebody sent us an email that's a long ago about the number of times cloacas are mentioned in, did I send you that email? Yeah, you did. What was it in? Was it in the Bible? In Les Mises, I think. In Le Mizz, that's right. That's right. The cloacas were mentioned, but not in the context of... Of the Omni Hall. Yeah, it was Michael that sent that through, so thank you very much, Michael, but not in the context of the miracle hole that it is, but it's as an archaic word for sewer. Yeah. It comes from a Latin root for Teclens.

And he used a great word there in here is that he said he thought that maybe Victor Hugo was going to be a bit of a cloaca head, but turned out not to be in the same sense, you know, but it's fine. Chloaca, yeah, I think that's the term you use. I couldn't find it just in the thing, but Do you want to do any more rapping up? No, I think I think we wrapped this up and we and we let the audience stand gently as well, which I think is really nice. A little disappointing to find out that, little disappointing to find out that Hugo

wasn't the cloaca head I thought he might be, but I still wanted to pass on this info to the official home of the cloaca, the two-in-the-think connect podcast. The live-hole. Thank you so much. We'll see you around. Take care, everybody. Love, love,

you, Hugo. Daily beloved. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planet broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. It's not optional. You have to do it. We used to go easy on it, but now you have to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average, and auto customers qualify for an average of 7 discounts.

Multitask right now. Quote today at Progressive.com Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, National Average 12 Month Savings of $744 by New Customer Surveyed, who saved with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential Savings will vary, discounts not available in all safe and situations. potential savings will vary. This account's not available in all safe and situations.