Two In The Think Tank - 91 - "APPROXIMATE HUMANITY"

Episode Date: August 8, 2017

Awful Man, Gift of the Giftless, Cobbled Attributes, Quantity Man, Candidon't, President In A Box Two in the Think Tank is a part of the Planet Broadcasting family  You can find us on twitter at @twointank Andy Matthews: @stupidoldandy Alasdair Tremblay-Birchall: @alasdairtb And you can find us on the Facebook right here Production by George Matthews. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Puppet TV, DVD, was dabbin' a new, pop, boobie, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, bbb, b I'm sure a lot of creativity by just mimicking what the other person's doing in a song. Elsa, that feels like a direct attack. It feels like a very, very early and very direct attack on my level of creativity. Well, I'm saying... Someone call it support. Oh, and I appreciate that. Someone would say, I'm backing you up.

That's really good. I actually look ahead and seen it like that. I had seen it as somebody hearing something and going, you know what that need? Wouldn't it, this song needs a bit more of that. Yeah, and what could be more of an endorsement than saying that the thing that you're doing is so good that having more of that is all that this thing could, could have. Wow. How could this be better than by adding more of the great thing that you're doing? Right? It's like when you taste a meal and you're like, oh, I like the salt. How

could it possibly be better than by adding a bit more salt over salting it, if you will? Maybe we've uncovered a flaw in me where I've been here. I wouldn't be at all surprised. If I hear something that I do and I go, oh, look, that's okay. But then I hear more of it and I go, you know what, I've just realized that this is not okay. If anything, just the less of that would have been actually ideal. I, I'm sorry, Alistair.

What it was was what you were doing was so sort of powerful and dominant and yet unpredictable that I had absolutely no ideas about how I could what I could do. Look, this is my solution for anything that is sort of a big sort of river stream that's carrying you away, especially in an almost scat-like form. A river of I'll always go high

Okay, you know, well, I maybe next time I'll try and go high over the top of the river of skat I have a feeling next time I'm just gonna go bridge. I'm just gonna go All right, you if you go high, that's great. Okay, is there a sketch in the idea of somebody? Two two musicians show up to a J.M. session potentially potentially and one of them is playing the drums and the other ones like oh I was also going to play the drums. That was exactly going to be my idea. Good. Well, that's what I mean. Again, you've said the same thing that I was going to say, Andy. What a great start.

No, it was going to be... It's something where two people do something and then one, like a flaw gets uncovered in the other person. Just the clear unveiling of flaws. Yeah. I don't know. Something in the moment when people realize they're not a great person. Okay. Can I get a bit more? Okay. So, just a conversation or like a social interaction or something like that. Like to go, yeah, yeah, it's a social interaction or it's like, okay, I mean, this is kind of, I'm going to a more obvious thing first. That's okay. But let's say somebody's hearing about,

let's say there's something on the radio and it's going, well this guy and he did this and he goes, oh, that's pretty cool. And then he goes, and this guy this guy, and he did this. And he goes, oh, that's pretty cool. And then he goes, and this guy, and then he did this. And he goes, oh, that's pretty cool. And that man was Adolf Hitler. You know? And he just realizes that he supports the Nazis.

So what is it? Okay. Or a man, he did some paintings, and then he moved to Berlin. Oh, I guess, yeah, that's cool. Like artist moved to Berlin. That man was that off-headler. Yeah, I know, but I think it's almost like, it's almost like, you know, and all that he wanted was, you know, for there to be national security. I'm just saying, like, it's people finding out a huge flaw. Obviously, I'm mentioning here that these are flaws, and I went with the Nazi one, because I thought that would be more obvious.

Yes, but the more obvious the flaws you overlook, the... Okay, how about this? What about this? He goes it goes because what is that smell oh is that barbecue chicken oh my mouth is watering because where's that smell coming from and so he's like what what smell oh what that oh that's no. I think there looked as a fresh dog shit there. Like that, right? And then this guy goes, oh my God. Oh.

I must love shit. I must love dog shit. Yeah, okay, I see what you mean. Yeah. Like you're, and you know, you could, you could listen to a speech in another language and say, oh, this sounds quite inspiring and then discover that it's, you know, horrific. Right? I think, I think a, it could almost be a recurring character who's like, it's just finding out.

It's consistently finding out that whatever the situation that he's in, whenever he has a genuine moment of unfiltered enjoyment or joy in something, it always turns out that it's actually something horrible. Yeah, right. Oh, well, what is the sound? That smell. Oh, no, my dog is burning to death.

Yeah. What's that, what's that beautiful song playing? That smell. Oh no, my my dog is is burning What's that? What's that beautiful song playing that's No, that's pigs being killed at the abyss. Oh Oh my god I look like I mean I guess to to name him just briefly to summarize it is guy realizing that he's an awful person man. Yeah, yeah. I think that's really good. I think it raises some interesting questions about free will and the nature of what it is to be a good person, obviously, like whether or not it's possible to be you know, what it is to be a good person, obviously. Like, you know, whether or not it's possible to be truly good at all if we're not really in control of our desires and our reactions to things.

You know, if you like, and I think it would be fun to push this into directions of like more abstract things. Like if we can find a way for him to endorse a really sort of divisive and destructive economic policy. Or... Yeah. I had this thought where he's, for some reason it's like an art installation where it's in the dark and his hands are through it. Maybe it's like his hands are through it. Okay, maybe it's not the dark, but his hands go through a thing and there's a person

on the other side and they're doing kind of Weird things to his hands like that and he's like, oh, that's weird. That's so weird And at first you kind of just see them like squeezing his hands like that and he's like, oh, that feels weird And that feels so weird and they're kind of like massaging his hand and they're like you see them tickling His hand with a feather and he's like, oh, that's weird. And then you kind of just cut to just his side and he goes, oh, what's that? That feels so good. Oh, oh my God, this feels so good.

And then you cut to the other side and he's got a knife in his hand and he's stabbing the person. What is that? He goes, what is that? It feels so good. Like that. Is that too graphic? Well, that's quite graphic. I mean, but yeah, I think that could work.

And it's almost a bit like the Raw Shark ink block test, right? Like they'll show you just some shapes and you'll describe something really horrible. And apparently, I was reading an article about a guy who was using this to diagnose previously, just diagnosed mental problems. And people were just describing this horrific stuff, and not really realizing that it was horrible, until it was analyzed. And I guess this is a bit like that. People were saying in the early and then

the guys eyes are. Yeah, yeah, yeah, describing really graphic, horrible, violent and sexual imagery. Yeah, right. And then the guy comes out of the room and is like, that? Whoa. OK.

But has that been found to be like a credible bit of? Ah, look, I don't know. I mean, I say I read the article, you know, I probably skimmed a paragraph on to yeah and I think he was in the in the case of this guy There was a specific case that he was describing and the guy had gone on to do something horrible Yeah, so he had turned out to be a bad person. I don't know if there's some sort of confirmation bias You know, I mean look it sounds very scientific when I describe it like that, Alice. Obviously.

I think it sounds great. Obviously, it's bad. It's bad that that guy went off and did all those awful things to people and whatever. But at the same time, it's really good for that guy's research. And I love science. And progress and learning. Especially examples that might skew my opinion of a particular science or pseudo science anecdotally

Yeah, and that's and that is that is a love of science. I believe if I've ever heard one. I mean I Was unsure about science, but then a few people told me that it was good and My I watched a video of a mother online and the mother was really a big fan She was a concerned parent concerned parent and her point was that science is good and and When I when I saw that I thought you you know what? Yes, science is good. I think that's good. I also read a thing.

Apparently they have these kind of like drawing IQ tests for kids, right? Where you get them to draw things. And for I think a long time, people have been trying to get, you know, find ways of, like, working out if kids are smart. Yeah, I've said that we can finally categorize it.

We can work out which kids are no hopeers, early or on, so we don't waste our time and effort trying to teach them or make them valuable members of society. As soon as we can physically and categorically say, you're a waste of space to a kid, the better, because honesty is important and also not wasting your time. In this article, it said that gifted kids have, that you can either waste their,

I think one of the reasons why they want to separate them sometimes is because they can, obviously, you know, Talon can be wasted or whatever, but also they have a real chance to become chronic underachievers. Really? Yeah, I don't know if that's a risk of... I don't know if that's a higher risk than regular kids that are not gifted. Do you think that maybe the chronic underachievement is a kind of a skill in some way that they can master.

Well, I mean, they're so gifted that they're able to become chronic under-achieve as much earlier and in new ways. In new ways. And no other people hadn't really considered. Oh, this is so our set. I mean, it feels like something that we've probably spoken about before. Maybe on the previous podcast. Is that exactly what we did?

We talked about the failure academy where you can recognize early signs that somebody doesn't have what it takes. But this is where we recognize that somebody does have what it takes, and then we help them to not use that ability. So use that ability in the wrong direction? In the wrong way. Yeah. Well, in this particular study, they were saying that they found that there's certain things

that kids draw in these images that now they do know only the gifted children do. And there was things like previously undiscovered equations that describe the nature of the universe. That's right. That's one of them. And then the other thing is like freckles. Or, or, um, moles is a very similar to freckles. But if the kids can tell the difference between what's a freckle and a mole, that's quite good. Goaties?

Apparently if a kid draws a goatee, then they're gifted. Wow. I guess. Okay. Yeah, I don't know whether that counts for a flavor. If a kid grows a go see, they're a right off. I mean, that's it. That's it's own kind of gift. It depends what the occasion is, I guess. Yes. If it's a some sort of fancy dress party, is this really dumb, but the idea of a gifted child, but it depends on what the occasion is.

Like is that a gift? Are you making some sort of a gift? Yeah, it's a gift joke. But it's like, it's a gifted child for different occasions. Like I'm not saying that we actually gift the child. Yeah, okay, good. But, but, but that they have whatever gift it is that is, is appropriate. Yeah, so let's say, you know It's a going on way. It's or it's a communion the first community. Sure What kind of gifted child would be good for a first communion? Well, I mean I guess knowing the first thing about what a first communion is

Which I don't I can't maybe understand the ideas of robes and sort of water. Oh, intricacies of, okay, so maybe let's not go with this. No, no, but I think something about recognizing gifted children. And because obviously one of the great things about being able to tell if a child is gifted or not gifted is being able to tell if a child is gifted or not gifted is being able to tell a parent who is like, my child is so gifted that they're not actually gifted. You know, I mean, I imagine that would be quite a satisfying thing. You know, like not from the point of view of the child or the parents, but for the person

administering the test, you've got an annoying parent who thinks that they've got a special little angel who is gifted, being able to tell that person that they're not gifted. That's my gift. I think that that's really funny. It's just, I mean, it's just that person who does the tests and then he's able to tell the parents, annoying parents, that their kid is not gifted and then the punchline is that's my gift. And I mean, again, this is a bit similar to what we had in the previous podcast with the alien that comes down and basically does all of that

for humanity and telling us that we're not gonna make it off this rock, right? But this is much more personal and there's a child suffering. So I think it's funny. Well, you know, there's a child suffering because There's a child suffering because of the annoying parent. And that puts the annoying parent in their place. We all learn something, which is that you should never support your kids.

Absolutely. Well, you can support your kids, but you don't have to think of them as better than other kids. Yes. You can just, or if you do want to think of them as better than other kids. Yes. You can just, or if you do want to think of them as better than other kids, you can make them better by not treating them like they're better than other kids. Yeah, that's interesting, right?

The ultimate gift is humility. Or, you know, if you can't achieve humility, you can substitute mild shame, self-doubt and self-loving. Very good, and you're very good. You can cobble it together with other personality defects. You can approximate a good personality by a sort of a, you know, that Mr. Burns, three stooges effect of negative personality traits, right? If your arrogance and your self-doubt, both quite negative things, if they cancel each other

out, you can become a good person. So it's like being able to build a stable jenga tower out of unstable constituents. Or uranium rods. Yeah, and so that is when you said Mr. Burns, you mean like all the, he has all the diseases and others that were able to get through. Yeah, that's great. Okay. So wait, is there a sketch in this? Look, I think they could be. Yeah, like I think a self help, okay, it's kind of almost like a maghiver approach to self improvement, right?

Where it's like, okay, when I'm gonna teach you any new skills, all right, when I'm gonna actually improve you or get rid of any of your personal problems. What we're going to do is we're going to teach you how to use your personal problems to good effect, okay? Yeah, okay. So let's say your constant interrupting of people. Yes, great. All right, so now, could you use that to? Well, think about what other personality problems do you have? All right.

Your one, your, you're constantly prevarricating, you never get to the point, okay? So imagine you somehow you interrupt yourself, okay? Before you waste everybody's time, talking about other things, and just get to the punch line. Yeah, yeah, okay, before you waste everybody's time talking about other things and just get to the punchline Yeah, right so so so you're going there. Anyway, so and and that's why the dog Sorry, can I just interrupt you there me? I guess what I'm trying to say is that you know, we should spend more money on schools spend more money on schools. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha don't believe in yourself, right?

Yeah. So you don't believe in, okay, now, see you don't believe in your own jealousy. So your jealousy, so there's things sort of cancel each other out. Great, you're constantly getting nude for no reason. Yes. But you don't believe in yourself. Is that one that you just said?

Yeah, just, we can't overuse the lack of self-belief. Okay, okay, wait. But you forget, you forget what you're doing, right? You forget what you're doing a lot, right? And so, And when you're halfway through taking your clothes off, that can feel a lot like you're halfway through, putting your clothes on.

So you start putting them back on. And then you're fine. Yeah, and then it just looks like you got just a slight, weird, nervous tick. Yeah. Buttoning and unbuttening. Yeah. Look, I think, uh, cobbled together, you're just a collection of coping mechanisms. Positive. It's, it's, it's called, yeah yeah it would be called like just getting by or coping as you know coping 101 or something about you know you never you never wash your face but you're always crying. People are always, just a little bit of,

just get a little bit of, what do you call it? So, soap, a little bit of face, soap. Just rub that in with the tears, clean face. It's because good habits are so hard to form. Yes. But bad habits are very easy to form. They're almost form naturally. You know, you probably already have a lot already. So you can just cancel out some of your other bad habits

by just forming a new bad habit. Yeah. See, I think that's it. I always said that's very well explained. Yeah. Right. And, you know, if I were to say what had happened just there, I would say that you had canceled out your failure to listen to my explanation with your desire to get the last, have say the last

thing. Well, I did very much struggle at the very beginning of that sketch because I was writing down stuff and then I missed some of the beginning and then so I was like, really struggling. You did very well together. I while you were saying the word cobbled earlier I thought of cobblestones and roads that are made out of cobblestones. I think do you think initially because obviously these days we don't really go for the cobblestone streets the giant rocks that you put in the thing now. They're quite rough and bumpy and

thing with that now. I reckon there was a flaw in thinking at the time where they thought, look, it'll be easier to just fill the road up with many large rocks like that, okay, because they take up a lot of space and so we won't need to carry as many things around and we'll just, and then we'll make the road out of that. Whereas these days obviously we just grind things up into very small rocks. Yeah, and very small rocks, and then we put it on there. Now, because I think, imagine how, how like they hit all those rocks, but they

didn't just find them like that. They would have to quarry them still, wouldn't they? Yeah, yeah. So you're talking about cobblestones themselves. Yeah. I would say so. Yeah, they quarried them. They probably shaped them in some way, split them and formed them. Do you think that grinded them down? Like, I guess they didn't have the idea of like making asphalt or anything like that back in those days. But it feels like asphalt is probably one of the oldest materials. Yeah, I mean, I've been using tar for a long time for various things.

But I think the idea of maybe whoever's making the decision about what it is that we should make the road out. Right? If they've got some sort of a problem. This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now. You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising. But what if you could be saving money by switching to Progressive? Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average, and auto customers qualify for an average of 7 discounts. Multitask right now. Quote today at Progressive.com. Progressive

casualty and trans company and affiliates, National Average 12 Month savings of $744 by new customer surveyed who saved with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary, discounts not available in all safe and situations. potential savings were very, this can't be unavailable in our state and situations. It's not sort of a mental problem where all they can think about is numerical quantities of things. Right, and somebody comes to them and says, I'm going to use gravel to make this road, bitumen, and they're like, oh, okay, how many bits of gravel is that going to require? And they're like, oh, okay, how many bits of gravel is that gonna require? And they're like, oh, I do some calculations, probably 17 trillion.

Oh, seems like a lot of bits of gravel. Could Tom, what was your proposal? A big lumpy rocks, okay. How many of those are gonna need? 100,000. Seems like this decision makes itself really, doesn't it? I mean, I'm going to have to explain this to my constituents. And when they say, how many things are you using to make this? I can tell them 17 trillion or I can tell them 100,000. I'm going to get ruined in the papers.

Yes. If they report that I'm building a road with 17 trillion moving parts or I'm moving at the beginning, hopefully you're not moving later on. Stationery. Absolutely. Wasting taxpayer dollars on 17 trillion when they could just be paying for 100,000. Guys. But then another guy comes and he goes

But I'm thinking we could what if we did this I'm gonna I've got an ape I've got a spare airport hanger unused right now, and I'm thinking about building the road in there One piece one piece pre fabricated pre fabric single sheet road single sheet road drop it in the place like that oh I can hardly see a way of improving Okay, see yeah because this is good because you're saying I buy a hundred thousand rocks You're saying I buy 17 trillion pieces of gravel, okay, but John oh over here is saying I just buy one road. And what is the thing that we want?

It's a road. So what's the road? What's the road that you're making, mad? I've actually don't tell me. Don't tell me I don't want to know. I assume I'll assume you're making it out of road. Um, in order to get the road there, we are going to have to knock down most of the town just to sort of transport the road there by itself.

Is that going to be okay? Well, let me say how many towns are you going to have to knock down? Just one. That seems acceptable. That's not that many. Is this too dumb? It's pretty dumb, but I reckon we can make this work. I reckon it's a sketch.

Yeah, I reckon it's a sketch. I can only think of one flaw with it, and that is... There's only one of them. It's not very good. But other than that, I can't see any problems. I think, like, there's something in that like, like, okay, so Hillary Clinton, people said that she had, she'd been in politics for so long, right?

She had this extensive track record, which, you know, some of it was good, some of it was bad, but like, whatever it is, there's going to be so many, just by definition of being in politics for that long, there's gonna be so many things about her that you can criticize, right? Individual things, so like, whether it's Benghazi or whatever thing you're harping on about, right? And people were saying, well, the Democrats should have

chosen someone who hadn't been in politics for that long, right? Who didn't have this track record. And that's kind of this thing, where, well, the only thing that's wrong with them is that they don't know what they're doing. Yeah. Which is kind of with Trump, right? The only thing that's wrong with Trump

is that he has no idea what he's doing. And that's really just one problem. Whereas Hillary Clinton, I mean, she had a, you know, so many individual problems. And obviously Trump has a record of taking advantage of people and doing mistrustful things and all that kind of stuff. But does that as a politician? Yes. Which really does seem like that genuinely was a big part of the argument was that, well, once I'm in as a politician, I'll be doing bad things, but I can do them for you. Actually, that was kind of a thing, Tony Abbott, you used to kind of talk about, like,

he always used to refer to himself turning into a statesman. Did he personally talk about that? Yeah, yeah, he would always talk about like turning into a statesman, you know? Wow. And he's just never got that inside of him. Like he doesn't have that in him. He believes himself to sort of, like I think even now he might think that he is an elder statesman now.

And like that he's been through a prime minister ship and he knows what he's doing now. But he is still just this awful flawed flawed, needy, bleh. Can I anyway? Yeah, selfish. But so I don't know if there was... Yeah, but like, yeah, I mean, the satirical point, I guess, that I was making then about politicians, and there's only one thing that's wrong with him.

Like, can we heighten that in some way to be like, you know, there's only one thing that's wrong with him. Like, can we heighten that in some way to be like, you know, there's only one one thing wrong with this candidate? And that is that he doesn't exist, right? But once you, I mean, how long, how long in the media cycle, are they going to be able to keep talking about the fact that this person that we're nominating doesn't exist, okay? That's, you know, one or two days into the 24 hour news cycle. All those stories about this person not existing, they've gone through this cycle, okay? That's one or two days into the 24 hour news cycle.

All those stories about this person not existing, they've gone through the cycle. And people are bored of reading about that. So the media is gonna have to move on to other things. Yeah, and occasionally people will still try and bring us, like, but don't you think it's weird that, like, we talked about this, we've been through this early on in the campaign.

The people aren't interested in that, okay? The people are interested in the campaign, the people aren't interested in that. Okay, the people are interested in the future and getting more jobs and protecting our borders. Okay. Obviously, the opposition would like to harp on about this fact, but I'm not going to dignify that with a response. I've said everything I'm going to say about this. Can we please talk about the issues? Our policies? oppression and forced slavery.

forced slavery and oppression. Not the voluntary kind of slavery. slavery. Well that's good. Look I do like that a lot. I've written down the only thing wrong with this can that it is he doesn't exist. Yeah, but I mean, we could pick something funny than not existing. No, but I think you could do, no, I think not existing is a pretty good thing. Yes. Because also, I think that's a logical thing where it's like,

well, we need, because I think you could just mirror exactly the Trump Hillary campaigns. So it's that like, well, she's flawed because she's been in for so long, then we need somebody who's got who hasn't been in for so long, and then they go, well, I know, but people don't really trust anybody who has gone into politics. And he goes, well, how about we go for somebody, a candidate that doesn't exist? How about we go for someone from business? Well, a lot of people in business,

there's this anti, they're still part of the establishment. People are very against people from business because they've shown that they make money by making a taking advantage of loopholes in people. Okay, all right. And so essentially this person is looking. Not for profit sector, well, not for profit doesn't sound like they know what

they're doing with money and that sort of thing. So, okay, well, what about? And so any attribute you get is just like the medium most liked attribute of any candidate. And it's like an improv. You can just keep adding to it. And anytime something does, anytime somebody doesn't like something, you go,

well, that's true. And then he's also changed this about his self. And there's no record to go back and see. Well, actually, yeah, you can't. What about, what about if the candidate was someone who's in a box, right? And it could be anyone, right? So everyone votes for it, because I just want

to see what's in the box. Yeah, I think that's really good. Who knows? Oh, man, I think. And really good. Who knows? Oh, man, I think. And all our policies are in this briefcase. I think that might actually be a different sketch. Yeah, I agree. Yeah.

Yeah. That like, oh man, I've always, my family's always voted labour. I'm a big labour supporter. I've always voted labour myself. But I'll tell you what, I really want to Labour supporter, I've always voted Labour myself, but I'll tell you what, I really want to see what's in that box. And again, that is a bit Trump. It is a bit Trump because there is so much ambiguity, there was so much stuff that wasn't

explained Hillary Clinton had all her policies worked out and developed and they were on her website and people didn't really care about that. But Trump was like, I'm going to do it. You're going to see this plan. You're going to love this plan. He's going to be the best plan. He's going to make it in up as he goes along. How are we going to take care of ISIS? I tell you, when we take care of ISIS, you're going to love the way that we took care of ISIS. It's that. It's like, could be anything in there. You're going to be so good. You're going to be amazed at how good it is. You've never seen anything this good. How about the, don't you want to know what color the hair is of our candidate? Speculations are off about what color it could be. Or she, you could

be voting for a woman. That would be very progressive. How would you, will you be able to look, if you don't vote for our unknown candidate, and it does turn out to be a woman, how are you gonna look your kids in the eye and say I had the opportunity to vote for the first female president, and I didn't do it. Also, the person is in that might be the best president

that there's ever been. They could be. It could be. Yeah. I mean, it could be Abraham Lincoln. And to be, are people allowed to come and shake the box? Yeah. Like, listen to the box.

There's just a line up towards Capitol Hill. There's the box in there. Or maybe maybe just like some major people from the news networks. Some interviewers can come along and try and probe the box and learn things about it using mass spectrometers. Yeah, somebody just with like a stethoscope. Or listening to the box. For sure, I was fortunate enough this morning to get to spend some time with the box. And I, I spent some time listening to the box. I was fortunate enough this morning to get to spend some time with the box and I

spent some time listening to the box and I could hear I'm pretty sure a shallow and measured breathing coming from the box. And I remember I got a sense that this is somebody who is in control of their bodily systems and is, you know, they weren't rasping, they weren't struggling for air. They have the strength to be president. I think that control over the body definitely means that they potentially could have control over the whole nation. Of the things that we know they have control over,

we're currently aware that that control is strong and complete. I was also in the room with him or her with the box for roughly five hours. Now, that's a long time to go without a bathroom break for the person in the box. And I would suggest that that kind of control shows a real dominance over the body, like we just said earlier. Um, do you think that like obviously like once the elections over the the box is obviously one, right? Would it be then a mistake once they have one to to let whoever it is out of the box? Or do you want to maybe save that for the second term?

Right? Because because then what are you going to do? You can't put then put them back into the box for the next. It's also great because then it's hard to be angry with a box. Yeah. Like if you know, I'm saying, oh, I don't like the box's, you know, healthcare policy. You go, well, you know, maybe I do. And so this idea that you have an anonymous leader, I mean, then suddenly it's, you have an anonymous leader. I mean, then suddenly it's, it could, it actually could turn quite evil because suddenly, like, you've just got a dictator that's, you don't know who they are, but they're ruling from inside a box.

And, you know, and then there'd be these, these skeptics that say, well, how do we know that whoever's in the box is born in America? How do we know that they even exist? There could be no one in the box. Yeah. I want to see documents that prove. Yeah. Yeah. Box, box, box, box. But a bit of a bit, but, but, but box.

I think we've got six ideas. I think we do have six ideas. Is it, do you think it's too short and ever? I know, no, I'll us to. People are begging us to leave. People, okay, great. Well, if you guys desperately want us to leave, well, then I will go through these sketch ideas.

We got man realizes he's an awful person. So through different, I think there's a real like journey to this guy. Yeah. We follow him in different circumstances and he just finds out stuff about himself. He loves the smell of dog shit. It actually makes him salivate. He agrees with the policies of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of context or when he, yeah, like he, yeah, it's, I, but you know, and I think like really, really liking the work of art and then finding out that it was a painting by Hitler or something, but like, but also like

whatever the smallest version of that is, you know, drink some milk, and it's like one day passed the use by date, but, but some reason it's the best milk I've ever tasted. Yeah. And then we have this idea that liking off milk makes you a bad person, but like, you know, these are all just little details that add up to a flawed human being. You know, you're a disgusting person, and some people would say that being disgusting is bad.

And I like that we can also, we're also defining their badness, utterly independent from any of their actions, like because I don't think they do anything bad. I think they still behave in a totally, upstanding and fine way in society. But it's just every opinion they have is wrong. Yeah, it's what if you found out that you were

evil for no reason? Is there something in like how, whenever somebody does something horrible, they interview the neighbors and they're like, oh, we just seem like a normal guy, you know, it's very polite and friendly, maybe kept to himself a bit. What if somebody did something really heroic and then they went and interviewed the neighbors and then everyone was just like, we thought it was a real piece of you.

I'm surprised. I am really surprised. I had assumed as soon as he moved in that he was aace at work. I assume when you guys knocked on the door I thought this guy has well it's happened He's murdering somebody yep And wow, I'm amazed that he has done it that this guy had within him any capability for any kind of positive thing because he is a dark cloud of evil. And I am surprised. Every day we would hear screams coming from his house

and the kids tried to tell me that it was just him using his angle grinder in the basement, but I didn't believe that. I knew it was him doing horrible things to people. Anyway, turns out the kids were right. Should I listen to them? Yeah. He used that angle grinder to save a person. Yes. It's life. It's life. Then we got guy who analyzes And we got guy who analyzes Kids that are are aren't gifted and tells the parents that they're not

You know where he gets to tell the parents that they're not if that is the case Anything so he's like and that's my gift. That's I think it's it's fun to shut down over excited parents. Yeah Yeah, I'm one of them. So, yeah know? Absolutely, do you think your kids are gifted? Yes, definitely. Yeah, that's really good. They look gifted to me. Yeah. My mom's got a really big lump in his head.

Like, he, just sees, is the front of his forehead? Yeah. It looks really big and I'm like, there could be so much going on in there. Like brain. Brain, could be brain. Could be brain, could be, could like, there could be so much going on in there. Like brain. Brain, could be brain. Could be brain, could be out of here.

Could just be fluid. Yep. Whatever has happened, there's something going on in there. Something going on and it could be something good and I can't wait to see what it is. What's in the brain? Who knows? Who's in the brain, in the brain?

What's in the brain today? But in that sense, little babies are like the presidential candidate in the box. You've got to raise them up to see what's in them. Well, that's essentially how they make the Dalai Lama. It's a version of what's in the box. This candidate is in the box and they train them to be whatever they want them to be. It's a bit warped out.

I think that also happened with the monarchy. Somebody was telling me that they only teach them certain things. Like when they're growing up, they go, oh, you don't need to know enough about this. You just need to know how you need to act in certain ways and your history of your family and all that kind of stuff. And we just hope that you're not a fundamentally

flawed person. Well, you just don't say much. I think that's also why they don't talk much. That's interesting, isn't it? Yeah, because even if they were, maybe that's why the system exists. Because even if they are a fundamentally flawed person, if they just don't say that much,

people can project whatever they want them to. Yeah, you don't want them to have too many strong opinions politically, because then they might realize that they're actually a real burden on the system and that they shouldn't a real burden on the system and that they shouldn't exist and things like that. Then we've got cobbled together positive attributes through cancelling out negative attributes. I think you call that a jury rig. Jerry rigging. Jerry rigging. Goodness. Your personality. Yeah. Jerry rigged a goodness.

goodness. Your personality. Yeah. Jerry rigged to goodness. Yeah. Jerry rigged yourself to less to to being less annoying. Yeah. We've got road manufacturer who only thinks of things in terms of the numbers of parts. Which you know, that's something, I don't know what that is, but, you know, it was a stepping stone that allowed us to get to what's in the box, which, my favorite sketch of the, of course, yeah, the podcast. And then we've got the only thing wrong with this can that it is, he doesn't exist. Or she. Or she. Yeah.

It's equally not a man and not a woman. Yeah. Which's equally not a man and not a woman. Yeah. Which is equality. Yeah, but then also, you know, just in case, you know, there's, because you've got a lot of, anyway, it doesn't matter. What do you, do you want to say that this, this candidate that doesn't exist is definitely a woman? Do you want to say that?

Um, no, no, no, I mean, mean, I think you would be defining them. I think it's not like the candidate that's in the box. Sure. I think you are defining this candidate that doesn't exist. I think you are saying like they come from a small town from working class parents who've built their way up and he's like, he's a real like, rags to riches kind of story.

Yeah, okay. Self-made, made self made person man possibly. Two kids to beautiful kids. Yeah. Beautiful wife. Beautiful. There there be themselves beautiful. That's all very important. Attributes for somebody who's making decisions. Anyway, and they just don't exist. The only problems they don't exist, but stop talking about that. We've moved up. And then the next one is a candidate in a box.

It's a, and I think that is a very good sketch idea. So that's what we got for today. So. Superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam,diam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam,diam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam, superdiam Boob boob but even I'm a new but I do pop boob but I'm a new shabba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da da ba da da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da da ba da ba da ba da ba da ba da And the weekly planet and steel wars and don't you know who I am and Do go on do go on give all those throw those people a listen You know, I'm a big I'm a big big listener of do go on. Yeah, do and then sometimes they say my name on the podcast That's when a successful podcast says your name. Yeah, sometimes multiple times. times, I really feel like I've made my mark and I will live on.

And as long as that mark is a skid variety, the skid variety, then you are happy. I sometimes refer to their podcast as do-goong. That's good too. Yeah, I mean, look, I like to trade in things that are good. So you can find us on Twitter at two in tank on that Alistair TV I'm at stupid old Andy and we're on I'm on Instagram and Facebook and all those kinds of things you can Throw us a review. Oh, we've got some really lovely reviews recently. I really appreciate them

Thank you so much to the people who did that we found out that you can appreciate them. Thank you so much to the people who did that. We found out that you can, some reviews are international, different, they like get categorized in different things. So you can't read them unless you have an app that allows you to check that and I found one. And so now I was able to read some really great ones and all you international people. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, we've found a whole new World to now be sort of insecure and peg our self belief to absolutely that's very exciting doing a lot of pegging And I'm that we love you This podcast is part of the planet broadcasting network visit planet b casting.com for more podcasts from our great mites. I mean, if you want, it's up to you. This episode is brought to you by Progressive.

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