Two In The Think Tank - 98 - "SMELL IN THE DARK"

Episode Date: September 26, 2017

Curtain World, Hooklife, Reverse Striptease, Clubbed, Smell in the dark, Relationshipmates Thanks to MVMT watches for supporting this episode! Visit mvmt.com/thinktank for 15% OFF and FREE SHIPPING and FREE RETURNS on STYLISH AND AFFORDABLE WATCHES And you can support the pod by chipping in to our patreon here (thank you!) Two in the Think Tank is a part of the Planet Broadcasting family  You can find us on twitter at @twointank Andy Matthews: @stupidoldandy Alasdair Tremblay-Birchall: @alasdairtb And you can find us on the Facebook right here Thanks to George Matthews for producing   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Alistair, I've got to, sorry, before we start the podcast, I just got to ask you this one question. Okay. Because this isn't me that wants to know this, but we've had some listeners write in. They want to know, when was the last time you did something good for your wrist? Oh, that was actually really recently.

Yeah. Yes, I bought it was actually really recently. Yeah. Yes, I bought it a Maserati. Wow. Yeah. I mean, well, that's fantastic, isn't it? Yeah. Well, it's, you know, it's a, it was very expensive. Really? Yeah.

Yeah. Well, I mean, you know, so that's obviously spending money on things is the only way that you know how to to demonstrate your love. I feel like financial transactions is the only forms of love that my wrist understands. And, but I wish that there was a way that I didn't have to spend so much money to make my wrist feel good. Well, that's, it's great that you bring that up, Elastair, because you can still do all the things you've currently been doing, spending money on your wrist. But now you can spend less and in a more convenient manner. By buying your wrist or watch from MVMT.com-flash-think-tech.

Now I've got more to tell you about this later in the show. But MVMT, uh, uh, uh, uh, Supposed to say they've sold over a million, uh, million watches in, uh, 160 plus countries. Are you telling me, go on other days where I have to carry a Maserati around on my wrist? On your wrist. Yes, it's become, if anything, it's more of a burden, Alistair. Really? That Maserati. But this watch, let me tell you, sleek minimalist design, comfortable leather or metal band, high quality manufacturer.

Look, I don't want to go on. Do these things cost sort of like $230 or $240,000? They start at just $95. Okay, well maybe the price that you'd pay for a Maserati in a department store like Maya or David Jones or Sears or Sears or Macy's Fifth Avenue you go to MVMT.com forward slash think tank you can get 15% off plus free shipping and free. I'll tell you about it later on Okay, tell me later on okay, but I want to keep you listening. Okay, so I'm teasing it. No

Hello and welcome to two in the think tank to show where we come up with five sketch ideas. I'm Andy And I am Alice the George William Trumbly virtual. Thank you very much for listening to the podcast my pleasure We are here. We're gonna do where you already mentioned that we come up five sketch ideas Yeah, I've already said that I've already said that said that. Thank you I don't know if I've said thank you so you say thank you again I've already said thank you. Okay, great. Well then look that's all the business out of the way and right now Just the the five sketch ideas obviously that we have to come up with and Another thank you at the end. Yeah, and and we're out of here. So we'll see if we can do that for you We'll get this thing to you and think about a little project and that I could come up with

Which is like a form of a I don't think it's like it's like Facebook but for people who don't have friends Because because the Facebook experience is hugely sort of rewarding to those who have loads of loads of friends there's more content there's more absolutely I'll say yeah there's gone a lot more of that going on stuff going on but what about you're rewarded for not having friends you know great so I mean obviously you're you're stream yeah social it's almost an anti-social media, it's what you're describing there. Your stream, your stream on your wall or what,

do we still call it a wall? I don't think we call it a wall. I call it a wall. I call it a timeline now. New speech. There's a new speech. Oh, a lot of new speech. There's a lot of stuff in there.

You've got a lot of friends, their updates, and then you got a lot of ad content. Well, I used to get on a call at a timeline. You don't want to think about the passage of time. Right, especially when you're so lot of ad content. Well, you see don't call it a ton, or you don't want to think about the sort of the passage of time. Right, especially when you're alone. So alone. And you've got no one with you. So what would you call it, just sort of a stasis field?

Or something like that? Or a stasis field, like that. Oh, you know, maybe sort of like, and I don't really like news feed, because I don't think all that much news stuff happens. Well, certainly not if time doesn't pass. So what if it's just sort of, it would be mostly ads now. I mean so this would be great from a marketing point of view, free up some space for more ads

that'll have less of friends content you have there. Yeah, absolutely. Well if it could just be all ads. Just be all ads. But all ads that are very nice to you. Well, you can, ads that you can trust. Yeah. So, yeah, I don't know if there is a benefit at all in somebody talking about finding a way in which they could...

Is there a way in which somebody creating a Facebook for no friends? Well, I mean, what if it was this, right? I think it's like you're just decorating a room. What if it's all ads? Yeah. Right, and then, but the ads can go on there for free. Right? It's free to advertise to people.

Okay. But then if you want to get friend, if you're somebody's friend and you want to get some content in there, you've got to pay for that content to appear in their timeline. So that's good. All right, so this is, because you notice there's a lot, people wanna see their friends content,

and they don't wanna see the ad content. Yeah. So maybe that's, maybe we're flipping this whole thing around. I like that a lot. Okay, because that's the content people are going there for, so why not charge them for that? Yeah, okay. I mean, look, it sounds like it'll be,

like it's like bottled water, right? It sounds like it'll be crazy for people to shift from something that is already free. Yes. You know, it's insane. And then move to this thing that is bottled and probably, you know, awful for the planet. I don't know if the... Oh, this, no, they're all right. This is awful for the planet as well. Great.

For every new user, we promised to chop down a tree. Yes. Well, that's what the, well, that's what the sort of loner Facebook Zuckerberg with the screen from the mountain tops, the bald mountain tops. Where he sits in his layer, and he's on ICK, that is the head quarters of this start up. It's because people are getting what they want out of the, I'm saying, then there's this perverse incentive for people instead of paying to get their content

in front of their friends, to become advertisers, to start corporations, and then they can advertise for free. So your friends will all then, to start corporations. And then because they can advertise for free. So your friends will all then have to start companies so that they can get their information to you for no money. Could be great for the economy. This is really going to drive innovation as people try and find ways to save money communicating with their friends. Okay, let's see, I don't know about this.

What do you reckon? Reverse Facebook pay to get your stuff in front of your mates. You know what, Andy, I'm gonna give it, I'm gonna give it my official thumbs down. Okay. Right, how about this thing? Which is not allowed on Facebook. No, all right.

How about this, LSD? Instead of clothes, right? Everybody wheels around a little curtain in front of them. So like around them or just in front? I haven't thought it through. Maybe it's all the way around. Yeah. Right? And then instead of undressing, you just pull a little thing and you withdraw the curtain opens.

Yeah. Right? And then people could see your naked body and then you can pull another little cord and it closes again. So that's good. So then you're just like a little show. So I guess you could sort of expose yourself, but it makes it more difficult to sort of to be intimate with people due to the distance that the, I guess the sort of the curtain rack. The curtain rod and the, obviously, the struts or whatever support the thing and then

the little wheelie base, which would limit your stride length, I think. Yeah. I guess it's kind of like wearing like a tall skirt that that kind of hovers above your body. I guess they could also do that with drones one day. Yes. It could hover, there could be a drone above you sort of supporting it. But the important thing is that you're sort of free to move within it, except for when you've got to push the thing around when you're moving, and your head, I guess, is above the line of the curtain. So you can still see and interact with people as you would. So that's nice.

But now it's almost like you're in your own little shower bay everywhere you go. Yeah, does that mean that you also have to use sort of all the sort of wheelchair ramps to get up and down around around the things like that. Yes, yes. Accessibility of end users obviously going to be much more important. Yeah. Because of the little sheer little cast of wheels

that are on the bottom of obviously. Yeah, they're not very good. They're not going to be able to handle even the edge of a, you know, a gutter. And do you think that this will mean that there'll be a lot more sort of perverts from above? Like because you said, you will be noticeable. They won't be upscirting, but they'll be a lot more sort of perverts from above like because you said you will be noticeable.

They won't be upscirting but they'll be down curtaining. Yeah, down or you know, or up curtaining. Up curtaining? Yeah. Supposed there could be some air vents in the floor and on the ground or whatever, then you could sit at height and actually wanted to see people sort of normal naked walking around bodies. But I don't think you'd be wheeling over vents because I reckon your little wheels would get stuck in them

So I mean that's probably oh, yeah, probably out that probably won't have that's true Yeah, you'll have to have to be very I think it'll make people much more mindful. Yeah I mean any any any bullshit that we could come up with to justify this is an idea LSD I think is great mindfulness is I. I like the visual of it. People wheeling around. Because it's like being in hospital and wheeling around that bag of medicine. Bag of medicine, right?

But for the well, or but also the ill. Yeah. But if you are ill, you could probably just hook it up to your curtain rack. Well, see, and this is actually really making, it's who's gonna help the ill a lot. Their lives won't change, a great deal. Yeah, the world, yeah, and this is actually really making it's who's gonna help the ill a lot. Their lives won't change, a great deal. Yeah, the world, yeah, less. I mean, they'll still be ill.

Sure. Surely at that point where they always do nauseous. People won't realize that because they won't be able to see that they've got a bag of medicine in there. That's true. So there'll just be a bag of medicine behind them. Behind them. And I guess somebody will just sneak one of those little needles into their arms to get the tube from the medicine from the tube into them. I don't know why that has to be snuck in there.

Well, because you said they won't know. Well, no, they'll know, but nobody else will know. Oh, well, okay. Because it's inside their curtain. Anyway, Alistair, do you think there's a sketch in that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Alternatives to clothes? Just people will, maybe, you know, could be a,

like, I could picture that on a catwalk. But then I'd, yeah, I would like to see it. I guess some of the advantages as well is that like, if 40 types will be less important. Only body types will be less important. Also, if there's a fire, it's like on your clothes, instead of, there's a little bit of distance from the clothes, so you, I guess there's less likelihood that you'll sort of, you'll burn really badly.

Really badly, yeah. But you can also just draw the curtain, just pull your little thing and run out. But I guess also by being a bit wider than normal, But I guess also by being a bit wider than normal, you're sort of, I guess, as soon as you increase in width, you're automatically closer to any fires. You know what I mean? Like, there could be a fire, a kilometer away. Yes.

But by becoming 10 centimeters wider, you are definitely 10 centimeters closer to a fire. To the fires. To any fighter. Yeah. Yeah. And then there could, there also be to a fire. To the fire, so any fighter. Yeah, yeah. And then there could, could there also be a version of this for the beach, right? Which is just a smaller curtain that is just around your nethor regions. So it's just like a ring of curtain

around your genitals. And then maybe it hangs off your shoulders with straps or something like that. I mean, they couldn't sort of just do it with floaties or, you know, or... Yeah, it could be floaties. Yeah, I mean, once you get into the water, it's going to be a mess. I'm pictured. Yeah.

And then we didn't get into the into, we didn't get into the business of finding alternatives for clothes because we didn't want to mess. That's true. You know. We should have known that this was coming. Yeah. A little, you know, it's, and it's, it is, it is, It would make life just a little bit more theatrical. I think we need that, you know, an element of the drama. At the end of the day, you could do a

sort of a curtain call. You could open up the curtains and stuff out. So, although, yeah, it doesn't really quite make sense, because really it's like if the day would be the theater event, you really want to close the curtains at the end of the day, you know, and then open them again, then close them again. Instead, you're opening them and then close it. Well, I guess you would open it to sort of suggest that you were changing clothes. I guess you could get into your pajama rod.

Your pajama curtains. Yeah, your pajama curtain. Plano lamp. Sort of, yeah, or I guess you could either into your pajama rod. Your pajama curtains. Yeah, your pajama curtain. Plano lamp. Sort of, yeah, or I guess you could either put on a new curtain or the... You could on to all the little... Yeah, you pass it through the little holes. I guess it would be nice if there was a quick release and quick.

Well, I'd like to think that with time, we developed that technology just to make people's lives a bit easier. I guess, and with time... This is why we got into this. I guess that with time, we'd probably also develop like a slightly, like evolve maybe a slightly different back that would sort of be more comfortable laying on those rods while you sleep.

Yeah. Yeah. Or do you think people should sort of sleep standing up from now on or kind of maybe dangling? Yeah, either or, I mean, I guess, I guess if they could sleep standing up that would make my life Well, what about this? Okay, as an alternative to beds. What we're coming up to alternatives to sort of you know very bread and butter kind of objects and people's lives like an alternative to bed to beds, which is just like a

Like a couple of kind of like straps that just come from the from the roof. Yeah couple of like just a loop like a strap loop It could be like a you you know, made of like seat belt material. Yep, some nice broad strap. Like that, and you just kind of lower them like that. And you've sort of put your arm through one of them and then you kind of rest it in your armpit. Yeah. And then you do it the other one like that.

And then you kind of tug on it a little bit like a... Like a rip cord for a... Well, kind of more like a... What's one of those things where you pull it... Like a little bit like a Venetian blind But it kind of just automatically retracts And you can pull it and then it just lifts you off the ground And you kind of just dangle there from your pit

In your pits? Yeah, I may be hugely painful And probably sever the circulation to your arms Well, you know, maybe we could... Maybe we could just put little hooks in the top of your skin You know, those guys who dangle from their hooks and they do it for hours and hours, and they say that it's painless. So maybe that would be an alternative to beds, because a lot of people

with one bedroom apartment, things like that, there's a lot less places for beds. But obviously rentals, you're not allowed to put up hooks. Yeah, yeah. But you can maybe get some command, strip, 3M, stuff, type things, you can stick to the roof. And if you have enough of them, I mean, if the weight isn't significant on your body enough to cause pain, it's probably not gonna be,

because it's spread out over multiple hooks. Yeah, because it'd be great to be able to get one that like a futon could also convert into a chair chair so you could also hang yourself by hooks in the sitting position. Oh, is that a very nice thing? You want it? Oh, you just have hooks kind of coming up through the top of your thigh and things like that.

Yeah. I guess you just pass the hook through the muscle. So I guess that would be a kind of more solid kind of thing that would you kind of really get a grip on. Well, I guess this is kind of like the, you know, we have that thing of the fashion that you see on the catwalk is so far removed from what you get in day to day life. The furniture. So this is like the, yeah, on a furniture catwalk. Yeah.

Yeah. A cat sit or something like that. Sort of, yeah. And this would be like, you'd see this on the furniture walks of Milan. You'd see somebody hanging all there of hooks in a sitting position or lying down. I guess maybe some people would just get magnet put on the roof. People know what we're talking about with these hooks. There's artists who will put almost a fish hook thing through their skin on their back,

on their legs or whatever, and then they'll just hang there like in a face down lying, suspended or spiss of a fish in the air or whatever it is. And it looks awful, right? And your skin all stretches out, but apparently it's fine for them. And you know, it seems outlandish to us, but I reckon it is only a matter of time. Before that kind of gets into the mainstream. Well, think about this. Think about how easy it will be to vacuum. Right? At the moment, your chair legs or whatever,

your bed, your head gets all in the way. You're trying to get under there to vacuum, but if that was all just hooks hanging, nothing's touching the ground. Yeah, it would become way more difficult to get rid of this, the kind the ceiling cobwebs. But I feel like I do that even less than I vacuum. Exactly.

That's good. Maybe we'll get some sort of little hovering rumber type thing that can buzz around, a robot thing can go around on the roof. Oh, that's nice. A little spider rumber. A little spider rumber that would avoid all the hooks. Yeah. I guess avoid all the people that are up there. And the people avoid all the hooks. Yeah. Yeah. And I guess avoid all the

people that are up there. And the people that are up there. Yeah. Yeah. Um, great. You know, and I think that, you know, I guess that could, and we almost wouldn't need buildings, right? Like we wouldn't need multi-story buildings. We just need like something, you wouldn't need floors in your building, say, right? Oh, yeah. You just have a really high roof all the way up, several stories high, and then everyone just hooks themselves in on the ground, and then you just get elevated to different heights. Oh yeah, maybe we could get rid of buildings altogether and just sort of do it on street lamps.

Street lamps, we'll just hang in there, off street lamps. Now, obviously there wouldn't be any walls or anything, so there wouldn't be any privacy, but I figured that all these hooks hanging around at sort of head height, most people will be any walls or anything, so there wouldn't be any privacy. But I figured that all these hooks hanging around, it's sort of head height, most people will be blinded anyway, really quite early on in their lives. And most of the good privacy. Most of the good privacy comes from not being seen.

I mean, there's something that comes from not being heard. Right. But that's one of the main ones taken care of. And, you know, the hooks, they could get into ears as well. That's true, they could get into ears. Maybe mouths. Let's be honest as well. Probably gonna be a lot of screaming.

So maybe you won't be able to hear over here people's conversations. I suppose. Because of all the screaming. I suppose you probably won't even wanna hear. And you won't wanna hear. There you go. You'll be screaming too. Yeah. And I guess removing of sort of like that you know that the whole concept of shelter

I guess also Mostly be dead from exposure That is the ultimate privacy isn't it the privacy of the grave? Absolutely not that there will be graves there'll be people hiking I guess we'll hoist them just slightly higher above everyone else Just out of the way. Yeah, is it good? Is there a player? Is it good if they're high? Well, then their fluids might drip on us. Yeah, thinking I do always think about that. But then we'll add to the screaming which increases the privacy which That's true. Yeah, and what about food though? Well, I guess, you know, we won't need to be...

We'll catch a lot of birds on all the spear hooks and wires. I guess a lot of the riding bodies will attract insects. It's sex. Oh, God. And you can live off a grub. If a grub can live off you, you can live off a grub. It's what I've always said Okay, and that is

It is the major that's the pitch line. That's that's that's a blessing this whole society If a grub can live off you you can live off a grub hang yourself off a serious books today today. Where are Curtin wrong? No, these are different worlds. Is it a different world? I thought it was the same world. Totally different world. People won't be walking around with their curtain rolls. People will get lowered at the beginning of the day and into their curtain. I guess that makes sense. If you could be lowered straight in, that'd be great. That'd be nice.

The only way that people would see you if they weren't blind was just in that descent time. And also while you're hanging here. Yeah. So. Well, what if it was illegal to look up? Right? See, that's good.

So that's good like that. It's a death penalty. Death penalty thing. And you could do that by just kind of putting a Google Glass, like sort of, you know, I guess, welding a Google Glass. Oh, I guess you could put a Vibre Pfizer. I thought we could sort of put a Google Glass thing

welded onto people's forehead. It monitors people's eyes and make sure they never look up. Well, you'll see more expensive, I reckon just a Viser, and like a rod that goes up behind your head, right, so that you can't lean backwards What can it be welded on yeah, right? It's welded. I don't know what to I don't know what how you think welding works I guess I think is really a metal metal type thing. I guess sometimes a plastic plastic

I guess a lot of people probably won't enjoy the The sort of removing and taking off of hooks out of their skin and the way I just want to leave them in. I think the hooks are always in. Oh, you think they're so soft. Yeah, and then you just connect them to different, I guess there's other hooks that connect those hooks. Oh, that's nice.

Yeah. If the hooks are always in the skin, or even if you just have permanent eyelets in store, like maybe like a little carabine, is that a thing? Carabina? Carabina. Is that the rock climbing thing? Yeah, that's those rock climbing clippy things. Those are very safe So that makes it what my statement I was about to make was that was very reliable. Yeah Yeah, I don't know why we like I trust those more than I trust anybody in my life Except for those because now but there's I think they're so trustworthy and reliable, as you say, I honestly.

That you've now get the ones that are like just on key chains and stuff, and you get them from like $2 shops, and they're really flimsy. And they're really diluting the trust and the good work that the carabiner has done. Yeah, you do have to make sure where you get them from. Yeah.

Well, I'll write down alternative world. But those things are great if your keys ever need to go rock climbing. That's perfect, yeah, absolutely. So, because I was thinking, so at first it was alternative for close, but then really we've kind of created a whole new society. Well, I mean, I would love to be able to count this second thing as a second sketch, to be honest, the hook world. Really?

Yeah. Certainly we've done enough talking to justify two sketches. I mean, yeah, but sometimes, you know know that's just going deeper into the world. It's not the same world that I said I can't. Your curtain, curtain clothes. Okay. And hook, hook paradise. Hook, hook island.

Yeah, you know, whatever. Hang land is, is a totally different thing. Well, in my mind though, you see, you know, like when they talk about like, well, there's the resistance, let's say, to Donald Trump or to like whatever, you know, like any kind of thing that people feel like they need to resist, right? Right. Good, very good description of resistance. Politically.

And what it means. Yeah. Right. They. Very good description of resistance. Politically. And what it means. Yeah. The gave everyone's on board. The I think people say a lot of the problems with these things is that it's just negative. And it doesn't, you know, you're not proposing anything. Right. All what's. And so I think that if ever we were in a circumstance where, where we were resisting something like a political movement. Well, now we have something that we could put forward as an alternative that would be. People say, oh,

well, what's your solution? I suppose you think you could do better. Well, this is what it is. It is a sketch. It's a proposal for an alternative that is a society that is better than America under Donald Trump. Right. Yeah. And so then they describe a really horrible place. Yeah. And thus, it becomes set off. And then it becomes satire. I mean, but also I do like just the alternative. As a sketch, look, it's first sketch of the moment. Alternatives for clothes.

Yeah. Even though it's just one alternative. I can, you know. No one, I'm sure we can come up with something. There's something with balloons. Yeah. Oh, so like that song, you know, no one sure we could come up with some others something with balloons. Yeah, oh, so like, you know Like that song you give me fever, you know, and people do that one when they wear a bunch of balloons

fever well, I hold me know Like that fever Like that and they get rid of the balloons and eventually they're nude. Oh like that. Yeah, which you know That would be an alternative for clothes if you just decide to live your life like that rather than... Yeah, and then at the end of the day when you get into bed you've got a pop-a-mall. Yeah, I guess like you could sort of do it as like a burlesque thing or it could just be sort of a little lost. It's fun. What about a world in which stripping and taking off your clothes?

Okay, here's two different versions of this idea. That's the idea. Right. Where just the normal way that people take off their clothes is in an extremely sexy way. Right? So, you know, a businessman comes home at the end of a long day. He's just there and he lives alone, right, and some apartment. And then he comes into the bedroom and he just

The way he takes off his clothes is the very like sit-long sexy dance thing I don't think it was any music playing. That's just how everyone takes off their clothes. Yeah, I guess maybe for to At the moment I'm having trouble like Pictureing how it would work where you've got a second idea. Let you say it on the second version is sort of the flip side of that And this could be part of the same universe And that is where when you go along to not the hook one, by the way, in the hook one everyone is naked, right? I guess so, yeah. Yeah, I could because it's a sense of the hooks. It made sense for me because of, you know, the curtains were being made. And that's why the privacy was so important. Yeah. Anyway, the, then if you would go along to a strip club, the people taking off their clothes there,

the strippers, if you will, all just do it in a really matter of fact way. Like exactly the way that your eye would take off our clothes, sort of struggling with the legs of our pants and like, taking off a shoe. Taking off a shoe with one of the things and then just dumping them in a pile in the corner. Yeah. All right, is that, is that anything? Like it's sort of a, it's a little then just dumping them in a pile in the corner. Yeah, all right

Is that is that anything like it's sort of a it's a real switcher rule is a real switcheroo. Yeah It's a switcher. I guess I guess it could just start It's it's a couple of business men watching us Got at the strippers watching a strip tease. Yeah, and it's very matter of fact Yeah, like that and then then maybe they get going, maybe they really enjoy it, they're like, whoa, yeah, like that. And then they grab their bags and they go to the gym.

Yeah. And then, and they go get changed into their gym clothes. But then they do it real sexily like. And then, but everybody else in the sort of the change room is sort of doing that. Nobody acknowledges it already. No acknowledges it. Yeah, and I guess it'd be good to say how that if there's any other way that we

could play that out like obviously people putting on safety gear and stuff like that. Yeah, or we're taking it off. Taking it off. Well, sorry, yes. That would work a lot better. Well, I guess maybe there could be one person in the in the change room who's just getting undressed normally.

And then one of the guys elbows the other guy and goes like, look at his shirt. And then they'll all start checking it out. Yeah. Ooh. Or they start shaming them. Yeah. You know, because they're, you know, they're,

they're being, they're being provocative. I like, I like the idea. And the, and these guys are like, you know, like they're homophobic. And so they don't, they don't want to be. They don't want that kind of thing. We don't want to see that kind of thing in here. I'll come on, mate.

Yeah. Yeah. No, that's good. I like the idea of somebody taking off a safety gear. Right. And, you know, obviously, you don't just put down your helmet. You fling it aside. Oh, yeah.

And everyone's doing that and flinging their helmets. And there's a quite heavy helmets and there's smashing windows and knocking over. I guess vases. I don't know why you have vases. Maybe like you know, like hanging rooms at the building site. Maybe like a nice heavy helmet

because other than those kind of plastic construction helmets, they're not necessarily that heavy, but those sort of really old, sort of metal fire brigade helmets. Yeah, yeah. You know, those would be, you know, that'd be a great helmet to remove. So maybe they're doing a sort of a fire brigade,

like ancient fire brigade recreation, kind of society. Or it's just olden days. It's just the olden days. Yeah, when I had that. But then you would have to sort of see the modern strip club in the olden days. Well, they've gone through a time portal. I guess they might not had that. But then you would have to sort of see the modern strip club in the olden days. Well, they've gone through a time portal.

I guess we see that. There you go. That's how you could explain that. Yeah. There's also time portals. We're rolling it all. It's all in the same universe. Well, see, suddenly now it's a sci-fi.

It's a sci-fi thing. That'll fit within our sci-fi sketch show. It's a Philp K. Dick. Really? Yeah. It's going to be available. Electric dreams, Stan streaming, Brian Cranston's producing. Brian Cranston's going to be producing the strip T sketch.

Yep. It's a coup, Alistair. It's an absolute coup. Like, like they're fighting for power. They're taking the power away from the leader. Yep. Right, so what have I read again? Well, something about chicken.

Oh, reverse. Reverse, reverse, it's, yeah, it's the reverse strip tease universe, you know. Well, a reverse strip tease would be putting on clothes and they all sort of get flung onto you. Which, yeah. Yeah, I think I have seen somebody do a reverse strip tease once, where they did get more and more dressed over time. And did it cure your boner?

Yeah, absolutely. It's tripled back up. I guess there would be, and I don't know if this is a sketch we would ever do last day. I don't know if this is a sketch we would ever do last year. But a thing that is another opposite of a strip club, which is where you go if you have an erection, and you would like it to be gone. Yeah, while you were talking, and that's what I was thinking about just then as well,

it could just be like a little booklet with some photos or some concepts, or it could be a clinic that you go to. And it's a doctor that deals with your erection. But is it not cleaner to have it as a, you know, basically like a CD, Gentleman's Club or something, but you go in there and you'll sit around and then stuff takes place on stage that is to use the parlance of the street. This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now.

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who saved with Progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings were varied. Discount is not available in all safe and situations. 3. Boone Killing Yeah, right. So it shows you a video of the Titanic sinking. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Would it be a live recreation on stage of the Titanic sinking or? I guess a turtle drowning in a net. It could just be like a... All of the... I'm just copying your aquatic sinking idea, really, and I... Yeah, well, I mean, it could be like, it could be like a debate between Noam Chomsky and Michelle Foucault. Yeah.

You know, maybe that'll make it make your bone to go away, especially because Foucault will be speaking debating in French, and then they'll have to wait for the translation. Nothing's more bone or killing than having no wait for a translation. Yeah. Yeah, especially a very complex thing with fundamentals,

sort of philosophical ideas within it. It's gonna take a long time to say. Yeah, and there'll be a bit of a bit of back and forth as he tries to confirm some of the exact linguistic, points he's trying to make. Is that anything else? Yeah, well, look, I think that that is. It's technically something.

Yeah, yeah, the boner cure, sort of boner killer. Yeah, I think maybe like what, what, when you said that, I guess I was picturing a universe in which a guy who goes to a doctor and he's got a direction and he's like, I don't know what's wrong with me, dog. This has been like this all day. Right, but is this, is this everyone has an erection all the time and then you try and sometimes it goes away and by everyone I mean all the people who have penises. You know, lady, lady boners.

Lady boners are a thing now. They're a thing now. Everybody can have that. A wide on. Yes. Anyway, no, I think I was just featuring a guy who was dumb who didn't know. Right. What an erection was.

Yeah, and he was like, what is going on here? Can you, can you do with this? It's ruining the lawn of my pants. Like he's, he's, he's in, he's at ER. Wow. I guess at ER at hospital, I have to see a doctor immediately. Can you tell me your level of pain, 10, 10? They never say can you tell me your level of pleasure today when you go to the hospital? It's very negative attitude. Absolutely. It's they're like the opposite of pain They're like the opposite of Facebook in that they've they've removed they've removed the thumbs up button. Yeah, it's all thumbs down. It's all thumbs down

Is there something in that like tell me your level of pain? Oh, it's you know, it's like, tell me your level of pain? Oh, it's an eight. Tell me your level of pleasure. Six falls. I suppose the idea that I might have to take tomorrow off work, that's pretty exciting. And obviously, I'm going to get a lot of attention from this. And that's good.

That's really good. And to be honest, not that much has been going on in my life that much recently and this will be a great story. And also, more I say, I'm just really happy about the state of socialised medicine in this country. It's fantastic that I couldn't come in here, feeling a bit sick, but not, you know, not dead and get all of this taken care of. Well, it just kind of feels good to know

that the conservatives in our country have not managed to rip it away from us. You know, and when you see it happen in sort of some any other countries, you know, and I just like to see those guys lose. So in a many ways, I would say nine. No, I'm nine. I'm more, I'm sorry, more pleasure than pain

at the moment right now, actually. But it's a lot of pain. A lot of pain. A lot of pain though. But just that things are so good otherwise and deep because of. I don't know if that's a sketch though. It feels too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, a femoral, you know. But also, it's also that it's like it's somehow connected to the, to the guy who doesn't know

about boners and it's like, yeah, it's another level. Well, yeah, we could definitely disconnect it from Bonamann, right? But I think in itself, I can't see, unless it's an entirely Bazarohospital, you know, where people, and again, this is just, you know, this is just the reverse strip-teach thing, but now with medicine. So where people go in when they're feeling really good

and they're asked to tell somebody their level of pleasure. I guess you could remove the boner from this altogether and that it's just a place, it's just a hospital that asks you your level of pain and then your level of pleasure. Sure, but that to me is not like I can't think what else we do with that. You know, other than the sketch that we just created that was almost a complete sketch. Well, it's just okay, it's just a bunch of talking. But all right, LSD, you're right. It was funny and I enjoyed it.

This is going to be our episode that we've done. We'll have the most amount of sketch ideas. Right. Other than the 100th episode that we're going to We'll have the most amount of sketch ideas. Great. Other than the 100th episode that we're going to do in a few weeks. And my miss is very exciting. Where we're going to come up with 100 sketch ideas. And you know what, Alistair?

What's that? Over that 100th episode, a 100th sketch episode, we're going to have a lot of people coming in. Yeah. Right. We're going to get a whole lot of guests who come in, you know, sort of on the hour. Right. And help us along the way, friends of the show, friends of a weekly, the plan of broadcasting network, right. And those people, when they show up, they're going to show up on time. You know why, Alistair? Why is that?

Movement watches. Really? Yeah. Have they? They've done something good for their rest. They're such a great product. There's such a great product. There's such a great product. MVMT.com-4-slash-think-tank.

You can go, you can get 15% off a stylish, minimalist watch. Wait, that's like 50% more than 10%. You know, that's a great way to look at it, Alan. It's 150% of 10%. Yeah, no, no, yeah, it is, yeah, yeah, you're right. Yeah, I know. And these Yeah, you're right. Yeah. I know.

And these watches, Elisdeer, I've got one. It's a beautiful watch. Oh, I've seen you wearing it. You've looked very elegant. I look a million dollars. And incidentally, a million is the number of watches that they have sold more than. And dollars. That's exactly how many they've sold more than.

And dollars is what those watches are priced at in. In, but not in a million. You know, small number of that. A fraction. A fraction, yeah, yeah. Could be one one one one hundredth. Sure, but it's much more likely to be $95 an up. Absolutely. And that's a fraction again, a fraction.

Yeah. Of what you would pay in a department store for an equivalent watch. Oh, well, it probably wouldn't be as good. Let's be honest. Even walking, you know, going to a department store these days is going to cost you a two, three hundred bucks just to walk, you know, you've got to find parking. Yeah.

You know, you've got to take the pay off. You've got to give up on finding parking and just park in a 15 minute spot and then get a fine. Yeah, and then get a fine. This is, these watches, you could basically, you could, you could just get a, you know, instead of getting a parking fine, you could just buy the watch. Buy the watch. Spend the money, you would have spent on the parking fine.

And incidentally, if you're going watch shopping, that is a real danger zone in terms of receiving parking fines. Absolutely. Because you clearly don't have a watch, or at least not one that you trust. Yeah. Right? And how long have you been away from the parking? Who knows.

You don't know. You don't have a watch. You don't, I don't have a watch. I mean, I do have a watch in MV2 watching. It's great. Even if you do. You do. Even if you, I've seen it. Even if you do, even if you are going to buy another watch, I reckon. Just go online, buy yourself a movement watch beforehand to take with you when you go buying this other watch. I reckon just go online, buy yourself a movement watch beforehand to take with you when you go buying this other watch. Then at least you'll know how long you've been in the parking space. And you'll save money on your new watch. You're still saving money off the parking find that you would have got. And to be honest, I reckon once you get there, you're wearing your movement watch, you've parked, you're well aware based on this watch of how long you've spent in the 15-minute zone. You're in there looking at the other

watches, you'll realize you don't need that other watch because the watch that you've wanted has been with you all this time. It's the movement watch. Yeah, absolutely, and it's got you through this experience. I think they also sell sunglasses there at movement, and it would be a great way to look up at the sign, the parking sign, and even if the sun is behind it. Sometimes they are silhouetteed or something. They're silhouette and things like that, but with movement sunglasses, which I'm pretty sure

that they sell. I think they do, yeah. You'll be able to, hardly without even squinting. You sick of squinting, do something good for your eye muscles. Sometimes the light, we're doing this out of a way to... Sometimes the light gleams off your watch, right? The light catches the watch and then shines into your eyes.

Now, but if you had movement sunglasses, yeah. You, that wouldn't happen as much. Absolutely. I mean, if you didn't have a watch, yeah. That wouldn't happen at all. But then you wouldn't know what time it was. You wouldn't know what time it was and you also wouldn't know where you were

Because you're because that you would have to be insane to not get a moment watch right now MVM to you don't come for a slush thing take 50% off for free shipping your fruit returns Look, I haven't even written down the pleasure of paying hospital sketch. That's a right, Alistair. You okay, if I don't? Yeah, I'm really happy with that. I'm wondering if there's a sketch in having to, and I could be really stretching it, but is there a sketch in having to buy a watch before you go and buy a watch? Maybe. You know, like the idea of, you know, you don't know how much time,

it's a bit tenuous. I think we're out on a limb there. It's a big limb. It's just where watches are actually. They're very much out on a limb. Here's a diet. Here's a dumb idea. Go out on a limb like you're watching.

Anyway, here's a dumb idea. You know, glow in the dark. I love this. Smell in the dark. I'm so excited. You know, it's a kids thing, it's a kids thing. Yeah. You know, you hold it up to the smells, you know, during the day, like during the light time. It absorbs the smells. It does the smell, but it doesn't release the smell until it goes dark. Wow. I've ate, I like that. Yeah. Yeah. Smelling the dark. Smelling the dark. And you could do it, like that. Yeah, yeah, smell in the dark smell in the dark and you could do it like you know

You could little you could trap it you could you know do probably play pranks on your friends hold it up to a sort of a weird smell During the daytime then like you know stick it to their skin or their School bag or something they pillow wait until it's dark put it in their pillow and then in the middle of the night will be like What is that smell? Smell in the dark. I think that's a sketch. Absolutely do. I think, like I don't know if it's you're going into like some kind of novelty store. I think we can come up with a bunch of products like that that are like, you know,

that are prank products. Prank products. I mean, I don't think there's as much innovation in prank products as there was maybe 60, 70 years ago, but even 60, 70 minutes ago, I assume it's just constantly declining, you know. Well, the best minds of our generation these days have focused on other things. Advertising. Advertising.

They're all working on advertising to sell us things we don't need. Not like prank products. Like, prank products like smelling a dark, which is a great product. Sorry, that's my marketing degree kicking in. Smelling the dark, here in the dark. I mean, come on, touch in the dark. Touch in the dark.

So it's something that takes the texture of something. It absorbs textures throughout the day. Throughout the day. All of a sudden it's shining. And then it emits those textures. Now, what does that mean? I guess it could. A good question, and I'm glad you asked.

Yeah, I guess it could be sort of like a miniature vacuum cleaner that absorbs little like air particles that are in the air. And then during the night time, it sort of blows those back out at you. Okay. So you have to put a magnet in your brain. But this is the smell one, right? No, no, no, this is the texture one.

This is the texture one. Yeah, yeah. Whoa. So it absorbs. Oh my god. Because it's the only way, unless it's like a rhumba or a zumba or whatever the thing that goes around and pick picks up textures like How's it gonna pick up the textures? Well, I guess you know in the way that you press plasticine against a rough surface

Mm-hmm right and then it absorbs that texture. Okay, right it takes on the inverse But still the same sort of thing. But then it's plasticized, so it's kind of squishy. But if it was like that, we're just sort of... Yeah, that's good. And then it takes it in on a kind of a conveyor belt of... You know, it goes, like that, and it comes out and it's got a length of...

And then it presses up again, something, and then it goes inside, and then it's got a fresh length. Yeah, then then it just has a clock in there and then it's a nighttime. It just comes out again I mean it sounds bad It doesn't sound good. I think in the night it must come and find you I think that's it and then push the text is up against it against your fingertips Oh, I don't know. I like I like like that it's on something sort of more unconventional. But if it was, yeah, I know. I know. I can value about and pressing it against your wrist or something.

Yeah, your face. But if it was gloves, where it could be like gloves, right? And then you touch stuff during the day, but you don't actually feel anything until night. It delays the feeling of the stuff that you touched. That'd be perfect for people who need to be able to focus on the stuff that they're doing during the day, right? Not get distracted by all of these sensory organs, right? But still want to have a sort of a rich full life full of texture and you know and touching things so so it they play out at night time. And it's it's like people who want to learn a language by listening to tapes while they sleep. You know at the moment all that sleep time that's dead time. That's completely. Sleep time is dead time. Yeah. Right? So if we can anything that we can do to

move stuff that you would have done while you're awake into doing stuff that you now do while you're asleep, I think that's great. I think that's an efficiency. Right? So being able to smell things. Yeah. The stuff that you would have, stop and smell the roses. I don't have time. I'll smell it while I'm sleeping. Now you don't have to, you smell those roses later on. And you'll be able to, this is another little slogan, you'll be able to smell these things when you're dead. What about this? Smell your later. I mean, look, that's almost a better name than smell in the dark, but smell you later, and then you kind of just show them the little absorbent pad, a little absorbent, maybe it looks

a little bit more like a sort of like a smoke detector, and then just put it a succs in the smells, and then releases them later like a... like that. Right. Right. Yeah. Well look, I've written down... It blows it up your nose. Blow it up your nose while you're sleeping. That'd be great if you went to sleeping you had to put like a little...

like a little tube in your nose. Yep. What do you think it blows up your nose? What do you do in there, Derek? Well, that's my new smell you like. That's my new smell in the dark. And we can look, we can argue about the name of this product. And we will. Yeah. This could be the name of this product. And we will.

Yeah. Yeah, we can, this could be the end of our cell. Let's say this could drive us apart. It already has. The tensions are already pretty high. They're already really high, Andy. Yeah. I mean, I've felt recently, like occasionally, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've it's too late for us to be driven apart. Do you think so? Yeah. But I think we're just too entwined.

No, look, I think that's not only at limbs. Not just our limbs, Andy. Not just our tentacles and our root systems. But I'm so alive. No, but I think Andy that there's a chance. Like, at the moment, it seems crazy. Yeah. But that's also because, like, we've got a lot of work together.

Yes. And I feel like, you know, even without one of us sort of, you know, doing something awful to one another's family members. Oh, crap. Yeah, no, that's your hand thought about that. You know, or just doing something so morally repugnant on our own, but then we find out about it and we have to eject the other one from our lives. Right.

Well, because that would look really bad for our careers if we were, yeah. Absolutely. We're stuck right with that person. Yeah. If you had to distance yourself from me because of something that I did, like a fart. Maybe. I mean, yes, but the fart could be a metaphor. Oh, right.

Yes. For like some other horrible sort of less socially acceptable thing. Yeah. Because as far as like a socially unacceptable thing, but it becomes more acceptable the more you know somebody. Yeah, right. And also it goes away in the air. Yeah. You can just open a window and it sort of, it dissipates.

Yeah, it's kind of like the opposite of a smellier later. It's kind of more of like a smellier now. A smellier now. Which is, I'm trying to get far to rebranded because that word far is kind of awful. It is pretty unpleasant. A smellier now. Anyway, so there's a chance that we could still go like,

hey, remember those, what have we spent together now? Like what, six, seven, eight years? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eight years. It's like it's probably going on eight years, maybe. I think I'm about to hit nine years in November to in comedy, so maybe I might have to do that. Yeah.

You're definitely already doing comedy. Yeah. So, yeah, so I think that, you know, let's say 10 years that we'll make it to before one of us does something awful. And then then 10 years will seem like a blip in our lives. You know, like that, like this sort of almost 20 years that we spent with our parents now seems like a distance memory. That was just a blip.

It was nothing. I said, was my mom's birthday on the weekend, at weekend, Gavry Car that said, great blipin' with you. Yeah, it was really nice. Thanks for the blip. Um, is there any sketch ideas in this? Well, I wonder if there's something in, and this is just a total tangent that occurred to me. And it feels like maybe something that would happen

in an episode of Seinfeld or something. Okay. But like, the idea of relationship counselors, but somebody who you don't really have much of a relationship with asks you to go to a relationship counselor, like an attendant at a car park or something like that or a convenience store person that you see you know sort of maybe once or twice a week. Yeah. Ask you to go to a relationship council.

I find that quite interesting. I mean it could even be just somebody who's like let's say in your workplace Who is just one of the people you don't really talk to on usually you're you're on you're not on bad terms Me any regard? Yeah, but you your relationships never progressed and they want to go to the counselor to find out why hasn't this progressed What is it about us that we're not jelling or why haven't we, is it that you don't know information about me? And this counselor basically is there to figure that out. Yeah.

They look, or it could be that there's just been some small, slight or some small break in that, because any relationship has its ups and downs. Right? And however minimal they may be, maybe you start going to a different convenience store or one time they don't have the chewing gum that you like. And so that is a problem in that relationship. And relative to the size of that relationship,

that doesn't seem like a big deal from the outside, but relative to the size of the relationship, that could be a huge thing. Oh, absolutely, it's a breakdown. It's a breakdown. And then that is sort of what drives you to this thing. I guess this counselor kind of feels like everybody could be your best friend.

That's a nice way to look at it. You know? And everybody not only could, but should be your best friend. That's a nice way to look at it. You know? And everybody not only could, but should be your best friend. And that's why. And they can be. And they can be with a little counseling. And then we can figure out how to find some common ground

between you guys to help. And basically this counselor is like fertilizer for two relationships that haven't, for a relationship that hasn't quite bloomed yet. Yeah as much as it could be I think that'd be interesting because you know in theory that You know the more times you go and see this counselor the more best friends you have right and you would come to the point Where everyone in your life was your best friend and it would almost I think make it Diffic difficult to function. Having such a strong connection with everybody that you meet so many shared experiences,

so much in common, so much to talk about, and so much joy as well from spending time with them. That'd be destructive to your life. Well, I wonder. Well, I mean, maybe to your productivity. But then I guess you would then sort of the circumstances would be flipped and then you would be best friends with everybody, but then there would just be one person with whom you're worst friends. And in many ways, that's the best friendship you've got because it allows you to do some stuff along. You've got to spend

a lot more time with that person so that you can actually. Well, no, well, you kind of, suddenly you've got your life scheduled in such a way that you've only got a certain amount of time for every person. And then the time that you would normally spend with that person, you don't have to spend with them because they're your worst friend.

And so then you have time to just do your own things like make bagels instead of rake leaves. Yeah, is that something? Relationship counselor who wants everyone to be of the church? Yeah, I think the scenario, yeah, I think maybe it went pretty far in. I went a long way out. We went far in, but I think a relationship counselor, somebody even asking you to go to relationship counselor when they're not that good a friend. Why don't you think it's working at? Councillor, when they're not that good a friend, why don't you think it's working at? You go, uh, I thought it was. You know, I mean, you're, you're, uh, the, um, you're the groundskeeper and my body corporate for these three buildings and we say hi every time we

pass each other in the, in the driveway. And I thank you that time for cleaning out that gutter. Yeah. And then that's where it ended. I don't want to have it hurt anything from you. You didn't, you know. I don't feel like, I don't feel like a needs to go any further than that. I think that's why don't you feel like that? That is that relationship that has served its purpose. Well, well, we are not on the same page at all.

So in a way, it just turns into this thing for like really needy people to just have a little bit more leverage over people who are kind of like, Yeah, I know. I think we've got a simplify. I think, I think, I think the, original idea, I think needs to be paired back so that it's not even that they want to be your best friend. It's just that they want this, whatever this relationship is to work. Yeah. And as for that they want this, whatever this relationship is, to work. Yeah. And as for in and of itself, I think, think out. That's what I think.

Did you see something behind me? It seemed like you're looking behind me. I thought I saw a spot on the wall and I wondered if it was a nail hole. It's not important. It is a nail hole for my advantage. Right. We can't thank you.

Thanks, Al. Look, do you think that that's the end? Yeah, I think that's the end. I'm looking at nail holes on the wall and speculating about the malice dead. That's how we know the podcast is over. Yeah, great. Well, we got alternatives for clothes. This is a sketch in which people have found alternatives for clothes, which is a little

sort of circular curtain rod with wheels that kind of travels around with you. Trumb little curtain. Sort of circular curtain rod with wheels that kind of travels around with you a little trundle kit little trundle curtain you know and And it's that it just hovers around your body and and if you want to reveal yourself there's a little kind of little draw string cord thing that you can you know, so then you can show everything Because that's the that's the big problem with clothes is that there's no simple way to show everybody everything.

Well, yeah, it's quite a... It's more theatrical. Yeah. Really, though, like, it would be the way things are revealed is the middle section first and a lot of the good stuff's right in the middle section. But then some stuff's a little bit more closer to the wings. So, yeah. Okay. But, you know, the more confronting stuff's in the middle section. But then some stuff's a little bit more closer to the wings. So yeah, okay. But you know, the more confronting stuff's in the middle.

Yeah. And I guess when you walk around with your kids, you could just keep them in your curtain, and that's a good way to kind of keep them safe. Yeah. Obviously they'll be tripping over a lot on the bottom of the thing. Well, they've got their own little curtains in there,

so you have to have quite a big one. Well, I don't know, but you could just get a one family curtain. Family curtain? Yeah. Well, that's quite nice. It's like the mini van of curtains. But then everyone quite a big one. Well, I don't know, but you can just get a one family curtain. Family curtain? Yeah. Well, that's quite nice. Instead of just like, you know, it's like the mini van of curtains. But then everyone's a different height.

So they won't be able to stay over the top. Well, that's the beauty of turning 18 is that you can finally get a curtain that's tailored to your own height and you can really see the world. Yeah. And not just when your parents are exposing themselves to people, you get a glimpse of it. You only see the world when people have really shocked looks on their faces.

I mean, that would really affect how you grow up. Then we got another alternative, which is the alternatives for bed and shelter, which is instead of beds and shelter, you just kind of, there's just a bunch of hooks that dangle off of street lights. You're all hanging at different heights. No, hang at different heights and the hooks hang through your skin and stuff. And then we hoist the dead up. And we leave off the grubs.

The grubs, because if a grub can eat you and you can eat it. And then we've got the reverse strip T's universe, which is some guys at a strip club where people are just getting undressed normally. But then you follow these guys later on and then you see them when they get undressed normally, they don't get undressed in a very sexy strip T's. But then they spot a person in there, let's say Jim Changerum that is just getting dressed normally. Normally? And they find that very sexy and they don't want that because they're homophobic.

Yes. Very good. You wonder, yeah, that's great now. But then there's somebody in a little, in the shower there, with the shower curtain, and that's a reference to the other one. Really? The curtain, well, somehow. Right.

By the way, I think the alternatives for bed and shelter is the one that ants would like. Oh yeah. Well the grubs, except that they're being eaten, their larvae are being consumed, which I don't know if they'd be so big on that, but they're never respected. Well I know, but I didn't think that they were ant larvae. I thought they were like more like fly larvae. Okay, so there's fly larvae of what we're eating. And then the ants, so maybe they're subsisting off other stuff that's fallen to the ground. You're pandering to the ants now. Ant pandering.

That was a lot. I don't want to talk down to ants. And then there's a boner killing club. That's the next sketch where, if you let's say you have a direction, a way of dealing with it is you just go to this kind of, it's a CD strip club like scenario, but you go in there and they show you real born-poner killing stuff like

Like maybe like a reading of the Bible or something like that. Yeah, yeah, and none of the good guys. I guess that's kind of what church is um And then we've got the next the next I think somebody just scrubbing out the inside of their compost The compost of a bit out of the out of your bins and you're at home You got the one that you put the food scraps into Somebody cleaning that out with a high pressure hose and then a little Rubber, rubber gloves a bit sexy, but maybe they don't have any gloves, so they're just doing it with like a stick See that's good, yeah, I mean

Somebody scraping dog shit off the bottom of a shoe with a stick. Yeah, or or even somebody could just be reading out our sketch idea for the alternatives for bed and shelter. Yeah. And then obviously the next sketch is a smell in the dark and touch in the dark. And then the next one is the relationship counselor for relationships that aren't that good. Yeah. Or you know, aren't that relationship?

Yeah. And so... Thank you guys so much for listening to the podcast. It's wonderful to have you do that. And we've got some nice reviews recently on iTunes. And we really appreciate those. It means so much. And we've got more people supporting the Patreon, which is amazing. It has been so nice. If you want to find, I'll put a link to the Patreon and the description of the show. If you want to draw some chains.

If you want to draw some chains, that's delightful. It helps us to do this in some small way. Yeah, absolutely. Or a large way depending on your contribution. I mean, if you want to give enough for us to live off for a year just by your donation, well then obviously that is a big. I mean, if there's any billionaires or trillionaires,

yes, we don't want to rule anything out. Yeah, absolutely. And I guess that's as likely as anything. Basically anyone in the 1%. Or if you're an old person and you just want to donate your home to us because the end is nine and you kind of just think about it. We'll take that. Well, if you are approaching the end and you've realized that everything is meaningless,

then why not give your house to us? But you might not be able to do that through Patreon. So you'll just have to contact us. Contact us on Twitter, we're at Two in Tank and you can send us a private message. Give it a public message and we'll get back to you. Yeah, at Alistair TV. At Stupid Old Andy. Yeah, or you can find us on Facebook.

Yeah. At Two in the Think Tank. Two in the Think Tank and yeah, just hit us that by direct message and let us know. Your address? Yeah, your address and when you want the settlement to be. Yeah, and we can make that happen. Yeah, absolutely. We'll work around you.

Obviously, we're building up towards 100th episode, so stay tuned, get everybody involved, but it's going to be like a 10-hour episode. 10th, it could be 20. It could be 20 hours. Not prepared for anything. Yeah, all right. Well, check out Planet Broadcasting.

And we love you. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit PlanetBcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. I mean, if you want, it's up to you. Thank you.