Unashamed with the Robertson Family - Ep 705 | Phil’s Nephew Has Dirt on Phil and Si & What You Didn't Know About Phil’s Big Sister, Judy

Episode Date: June 23, 2023

The dirt is flying, with Phil’s nephew Jon Gimber giving the lowdown on young Jase, Willie, and Al! The guys discuss Judy, Phil’s older sister, and how her legacy is a big part of the family history. Phil reminisces about their difficult childhood that made him into the man he is today. Jon, a leader in men’s ministry in North Monroe, and podcaster Chris Grainger of "The Lion Within Us" talk about the importance of training and community between Christian men. The guests give advice on how men can be effective spiritual leaders in their homes and communities. In this episode: John 8, verses 31-47; Romans 12, verse 14 https://philmerch.com – Get your “Unashamed” mugs, shirts, hats & hoodies! Show Hollywood we're willing to show up for great movies with a strong Gospel message. Get your tickets to "The Blind" TODAY: https://www.fathomevents.com/theblind — Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I am unashamed. What about you? So welcome back to Unashamed. We're still missing Jace. It makes for a much quieter set when he's not here. But he's been off to New York, getting tales and meeting people and whatever you do in New York. So when he gets back, we'll have, I'm sure, a lot of stuff from Jay. So we have in his chair. family member. And I used to say you're half Robertson, but then some Zach reminded me that we're all half Robert. Well, that was, Zach's been using my material. I actually reminded you. Or you said that first. Okay, good. So this is John Gimber, my first cousin. And it's like my little brother, like another little brother, because when I was working on my testimony back in the day,

I went off to New Orleans, sort of like the young man in Luke 15. And, uh, didn't, quite have a plan for my life but didn't want to be here because I wasn't living the right way. And so I went down and got a job in New Orleans. And I live with John and his family. And my aunt Judy, who's was dad's older sister, she's been passed away how many years now? Since 2006, almost there'd be 17 years this summer. That's unbelievable. 17 years. And so she got cancer. And anyway, she was a big part of my life. I mean, not just because of that era, but always. She was super fun. She loved LSU.

So it was because of her and my uncle Harold, dad's older brother, who also loved LSU that me and Jace and Willie became such huge fans because dad didn't go to school there. And I mean, I guess it was state school dad, so you kind of halfway supported. But, I mean, you didn't, you weren't passionate about it. But they were passionate about it. I mean, so when I lived down there, Judy, she would, on game days on Saturdays, which we were typically all home because I worked at the hospital and she did too, but she only worked during the week.

And she would come through with the Tiger Fight song plan and she'd have a broom doing the marching band. Remember that? Coming down the hall. Air baton and she would drop it. Yeah, she would drop it and she would do the whole thing. I mean, she was into it. And so, and we went to a lot of games together.

So it was fun. It was one of those times. It was a dark period of my life because I wasn't right with Christ. but because there was family there, there was a lot of good memories, you know. And so we had a lot of those two. For sure. I used to sleep in your room.

Yeah. Remember that kicked you out of your room? Yeah. I was, you know, it was always, seemed like somebody coming and going, and I remember that, you know, getting kicked out when you came in. I remember when I moved, you know, and then, you know, the other connection was maybe while you were down there,

our school teachers went on strike for a year. And that was when I moved in with Phil and Kay. And I remember. remember coming up and Jason and I shared a bedroom. So back then it was two bedrooms, Phil and Kay's bedroom, which was do not enter. Now, were they through bed wedding at that point? Because when I was younger, we all three something slain bed, but we didn't know who had the bed waiting issue because it could have been any of us.

You know, when you wake up in a pool of urine, you're not exactly sure where it comes from. Now, luckily, that was still Willie back then. I think Willie was well in high school. We all determined it was Willie, right. Me and Jay shared that. It was a lot of good times. And it developed all relationships, you know, which.

was I'm thankful for because, you know, my life wasn't always perfect, but I had those memories and I had that guidance from Phil and from Jason and from you for sure. And because of our connection, it just really let me be drawn that way. So what I remember about your childhood, John, is you put the A and D and ADD. You were a hyper child. Yeah, I was undiagnosed, I think, for a long time. They didn't know about it back in the day. Boy, if we'd only know it was of Riddlin back in the day, boy, if we'd only know it was a Riddlin back of John's Day. So he was a hyper child. But, you know, that John has always had an endearing quality because he has a huge heart. And, you know, Judy did too, but your dad does too. He's kind of a gruff exterior, but he also has a big heart too. I mean, you know, you'd have to know your dad,

like I knew him to appreciate his heart because like on the outside, he's a idiot, you know, But, like, he really has a big art. He's, yeah, he's, and it's been different, you know, he's, he's, he's, he's dealt with the dementia coming in and stuff now, too. But over the years, I mean, dad loved us and, and did everything possible. He didn't come from, of course, none of us. I don't ever remember getting a hug from Granny and Paul ever. No.

And so, like, there wasn't, and it, and I never got one from his mom. So it was just a different type of love shown. I mean, we were all really close and we all love each other and care for each other. and the things that family has done for me over the years, it's been unbelievable because we love each other, but it's just a different way of showing it. It wasn't a touchy-feely, and dad's the same way. He wasn't a touchy-feely dad.

So you always, and you had a love for hunting, which, you know, whatever that is in our DNA for that, I guess anybody can love it, but certainly something about our family is, it's just been a stock thing since we were kids, you know, that we love to hunt. And you share that with us. us even to this day.

But then I think one another link that we've had done with your family in particular, and you to us, has been food, has been cooking. And, you know, you've always, you kind of took that from your mom.

Judy was always kind of the, when she was alive, she was that one sibling that brought everybody together. Yep. Remember all of our, when Granny and Paul were still alive, and especially when they got too old to host things themselves, because you're going to get to that point where you just can't host.

and feed that many people. When they got to that point, Judy took over. And then it really changed after that because that was kind of the end of that era when she was gone about getting together with your siblings. I mean, now it's just kind of hit or miss through the years. And so I think that love for food and cooking, I mean, we were just, John, just this last week. So we're down. And now Alex, you know, my youngest likes to cook. And so we were down making the meatball recipe, which is Judy's meatballs.

But she calls you to get the recipe. We're cooking it. They're cooking it for the first time. And we have people over there and say, oh, this is fantastic. It's the best stuff I've ever had my life. And, you know, you just take for granted that blessing of being able to not only cook, but cook well. Right.

And to make stuff really good. And that's always been. That's how mom was. She tried to learn from the best, do it the right ways. And she was a great cook. And what's so funny is, and I think it's because of how y'all were brought up, she did things simple. She did things not overly extravagant.

but very, very well. And one of my most... We come out of the old log cabin where it was not, you know, survival, food was survival. Well, I would think in the way you are, Dad, knowing your brothers, especially, the girls had to really have a hard time because it was just most, all the boys. But then they had to at least have a little bit of privacy, right, because they were girls. I mean, as much as you could. It was 1800 living. Mom said she wore boys underwear growing up because the boys outnumbered the girls.

And they bought for Jimmy Frank and then just cycled them down. And so she never had girls underwear she said because she went to college. So those tiny wadies didn't stay tight across the generations. They became Lucy Ducey's after a while. Yeah. Well, I have heard this story about the number three wash tub, bathe by age order that happened. Is that a true story? Sit down in the backyard.

I set, feel, put, what, get well water and pour over in the, so it's cold to begin with.

Yep, and let it sit in the sun for a little bit. At least it gets up the temperature outside. Think about it, wintertime and all that, you know,

not a whole lot of baths. Too cold. But they had poured them in number three wash tub and the women had their way of putting curtains around them for something. I don't forget how that went down. But all the guys started from the top,

the oldest, all the way down to the lowest. That's why you see sigh away acts like he does. He was the last man on deck. He had a lot of, bathing, food, everything. He was always in a dirty water. Yeah. He was born ostracized.

Well, one time we got into a hunting situation a few years ago, and some of that bubbled over, he said, I got tired tracks on my back where I've been run over my whole hour. So I guess it does go back being the youngest. It is. And you're the youngest. I'm the youngest. I'm the baby. Except for a vehicle, an old vehicle, a forward vehicle.

If you remove that and pulled up in our yard, you would have thought it was 1,750. Yeah. 1,800 living. So if you ever come to... No, no gas heat, just fireplace on one end of the cabin. I mean, you went out to the, it was a big deal when they finally got a well pumped to pump water inside your house. You have running water. I remember when it was just a bucket, bucket at a time.

It's like magic, wasn't it? Oh, yeah, all. What are you talking about? So if you come to the tour, it's that Duck Commander now, the first place you walk into is a recreation of that setting. Yep. Which is pretty interesting. And show where they all. One man built the house with a cross-cut saw and an axe.

One man built that house. So it was just, it was what you would live in 1800s. So I think some of your cousins actually took that house. and fixed it up. I think it may even be a bed and breakfast. I'm not sure. It's some kind of museum. Or a museum or something, yeah.

It's over in Vivian, so if you're ever interested in seeing all that. That was their roots, but they were 1800 all the way. Very humble. Yep. Humble beginnings. So, John also, because you always love to cook, and so you've always catered and grilled stuff and just been good at it. And so when we had Miss Case, you ran it with,

Alex, my daughter, and so, you know, ran our restaurant. So you're still in the food stuff field. Now he's selling it. Now I'm selling the green beans, so it's a little different. He works for Cisda. Is it better than cooking them? It's way better. It's the biggest thing is just a time.

That's a workhouse. It's a work. We just did, you know, Jep's, uh, Louis wedding Monday and everybody loved that. And his food was delicious. Oh, yeah. The food was. Never had a bad Gemberman. Yeah, but it's, but it's funny because, you know, the other thing about our family is,

we've been a little critical at times. And the rating system is a little odd. I mean, most of the time rating systems, you get like a one to ten. We don't get that. We get zeros in ten. It's either the best or it's the worst. And people are not really bashful. And nobody is going, in the Robertson, Gimber and any other family, is going to tell you something as good when it isn't because we don't want to continue bad.

You don't, you'll get it. You're going to get it again, right? You'll never brag on bad cooking for you'll be getting it the rest of your life. So we, I think that because he was, oh, how do you keep from hurting each other's feels? Because it starts with us. You can eat a dish, John. You made it, you take a bite of it.

What's the first thing you say if it's no good? Nope. And then trash can. We'd always say, I'd say if it was really bad, I said, throw it to the dog and see if they'll eat. And I'd be watching from the door. When they threw it out there and the dog just kind of smelled and walked off, maybe to take a leak on it.

I said, no, I said, no good. That's the ultimate insult to a meal. Yeah, the dogs won't even eat. The dogs won't even eat. But it's neat. You mentioned that cook. And one of the coolest things I had before Mom got really sick, she had written, hand-wrote a bunch of her recipes for me in a spiral notebook.

And I've got like her, you know, shrimp corn stew, her jumbulli, her gumbos, of course, the spaghetti's in there. And ironically, it was lost. lost for about two years at Dasher's house. I went over there to make the spaghetti one time. That's a black hole for anything at the Dasher house. But they found it like two years later. And like I was squalling my eyes out because this has written.

Mom kind of inscribed it to me. So when you're reading it and cooking it, it makes you think of her. I mean, it just every time. Right. Plus I have her old Magnolite pot. She gave me. So I'm cooking in her pot. And I'm getting the chills right now because it's just the sounds.

Like when you're making a rue in that pot, it reminds me of being a kid. And I'm making it to her recipes, usually for our family. And everybody knows that that's not my gumbo. That's mama's gumbo that's been brought in. And so it's just neat. And so you taste that gumbo and it's like you were saying, you're tasting 1800s. You're tasting authenticity. You're tasting family traditions. I'm thinking I'm tasting Labor Day weekend, the first football game and the first little cool snap. I'm tasting the first time we killed ducks that year to put in them. I'm tasting all these memories that can be encompassed in a bowl, which is what makes food so cool.

By the way, we're eating some ducks now. When we have them, you take the breasts, cut them in strips about like that, you know. You're stripped about that long, and you put a light saltwater light brine, brine overnight, pour that off, let them soak in buttermilk, pour that off on the second night, third night you run the rollette and sour cream and fry it you can season up flower and fry as they're frying they're just duck fingers yeah but they're just fried duck yeah I'm telling you it's it is a great way to eat ducks it's fantastic and then also they are they are good and also shows you what you have to do to a dutch to make him yeah I mean just to be fair so so

so John I wanted to to mention that um once it one of these times I went to at least now one of these fat doctors. And he told me, he said, you have to divorce your love of food. As what he told me. And I was like, Doc, I mean, I'm in for a separation that I don't really believe in divorce. And I'm going to tell you right now, food means more to me. And when you were describing that about your mom and the thoughts and the connections, that's the way I think of food, you know, in our family, which is a big deal.

So I want to make a transition. And we have another guest that we're going to bring on just a minute. because we're talking about blood family, but the blood of Jesus changed our dynamic in relationship again. Because we share, you know, Robertson blood in DNA and a lot of things we like to do, our connection. And, you know, we're clannish like any family. I mean, we kind of stick to ourselves. But the blood of Jesus had another change in our relationship. Because when I first was around you, I was not acting like Christian.

And so I was a terrible example to you as a young boy. But later in life, as I came to Christ and came back, you had struggles of your own, you know, in your young life. And then when we reconnected fully, when you guys moved here, you and Megan, we connected at a spiritual level too. And so I think part of my role with you now is sort of a big brother in Christ has been a mentor. Lisa and I as a mentor to you guys in your marriage and relationship. And so that growth and what you guys have done has been incredible. And so that was one of the reason why I wanted to have it on the podcast today because we also have another guest. Chris Granger is going to come on and talk about men's ministry.

But when I thought about people who are doing community ministry in our area here in Monroe and West Endow, I thought about you because you're a big part of that. And so I want to talk about that as well as just marriage and other things as well. So we're going to take a pause here. When we come back, we're going to bring Chris Granger into our podcast. So hang on one second. Welcome back to Unashame. Chris Granger, welcome, Chris.

Good to be here. Into the lair. Yeah, so I've worn your hat before because I was on your podcast, because I love the name of the line within. Which tell us where you got that name from. I give that all to my wife, man. She came up with the name of the line within us and just talking with her about starting a men's ministry and we were coming around the idea and she said, you know what, the lion. Let's talk about, you know, you talk about the lion of Judah.

Yeah. And I just got rolling with it and it stuck and here we are. You know, it's another great picture because we talk about the Lamb of God and the idea of sacrificial Jesus, which is obviously, you know, such an important, you know, view of him. And we've been talking from Luke 6 about this idea of laying down your life. but there is that lion of Judah image you get in the scriptures as well in Revelation, some other places that, you know, he's a fighter too, you know. So you got both sides of that, you know, so you have to be able to relay that, I think,

as men. Chris is from North Carolina. Lisa and I spoke at his church and also did a men's. I did a men's event for you that you had helped put together. And so anyway, we appreciate what you do. It's good to have me on the podcast. I know you've been a listener for a long time and we're a fan of the show before that. Absolutely.

It's good to have you here. He showed me one of his clip from one of his podcast where he had his children interview him. And it was really a cool concept for that. It made me think, wouldn't it be something about my grandkids interviewed me, the questions that you would get. And one of those was, they were asking us, well, if you ever get to go to, you know, meet the Robertsons and do their podcast, you know, who would you take with you?

So then they all start jocke in for position as to who gets to come. Everybody wants to be the plus one. That's exactly right. And it turns out he came by himself. So we've got to do a good job of showing them this so they'll get the. So I want to have you both on and talk a little bit today on our podcast because about community and about men being able to help men. Our audience is wide and range. And certainly our female audience has picked up a lot.

So I see since we started having the wives on more. But we still have a lot of. young men, they're on the podcast. And I know from the questions that I get from them, it's like, well, how do I, how do I, how do I live a spiritual life for God? How do I do, how do I leave my family better? How am I a better dad? And so it's, it's all these questions about, you know, somehow being better, but not being able to be sure how to get there, you know. And so, and I thought about community and I thought about you guys coming on. And John, we were mentioning and four-winter break that, you know, I got to see your life grow.

And you had a lot of early issues. I went through a divorce. Talk a little bit to that about as a young man, some of your experiences, and how it kind of came to where you landed with Megan now and the path you've been on for the last 20 years. So it was a whirlwind. I mean, not the way for sure. I would have drawn it up.

But in college, a girlfriend gets pregnant, do what you think you're supposed to do, which is get married and everything's going to work. And we were on a class together. Right. We were in college together because I had gone back as an older person and John was there as a younger person with his girlfriend. And she was pregnant and I didn't know it and you didn't know it.

And we were in class together. And we were, and what's funny is we would do the little routine kind of like almost like today. So we were owning that English class. Yeah. I mean, that was our class and everybody else was there to, you know, to take it. But you see the changes that happen and you have to grow up. really quick trying to do the things that you think you're supposed to do and you rock and roll and move it try to do it the right way but uh which you know i mean y'all may not have understanding about

this but i was doing it my way and that just doesn't work out uh and so uh after trying to do it for a while again it didn't work out i was kind of at a i guess a breaking point um and i remember specifically praying one night and uh to god and saying god i don't know what you got lined up for me I know you've got plans to benefit me, but I'll do a lot of things for you, but what I won't do is forget you. And then almost immediately met who's my wife now, started trying to make decisions the right way based off of not my selfishness, but about what God had for me. And the blessings along that way, it hadn't been easy. You know, at all we talk about that, I mean, happily married compatible couples are still going to disagree. They're still going to

have issues. And we've had a host of them, which I'm so thankful for you, you know, for guiding us through there. I'm thankful for Phil for guiding me when I was single and, and showing me that God did have a plan for me. But as I started being obedient to him and searching for him on how to know him more and how to do what he wanted me to do with my life, the blessings have been immeasurable. We have a couple kids now that are awesome. I've got a wife now, married 20 years, and don't deserve her, don't deserve anything. But, but what, and so what we've tried to do since that time was, using your, your quote, paying it forward is taking what other people have shown us and the love of Christ exemplified

to us through relationships and through teaching and trying to spread that out through my community. And I know because of what I tried to do for the longest time was when I wasn't living it, right? It was I tried to isolate. I said, I can just pull myself back. and hide all my sin from people, and it won't bother anybody. And then that way I can still put on the face I need to when I'm in front of somebody on church or in front of my mom or dad or whatever else. And I just keep rocking and rolling, and that just didn't work out.

And the same thing happened with Megan. She was similar. I mean, you know, just the idea was I'll isolate and get better, but she didn't. And when we all came out together and dealt with that as couples and as brothers and sisters in Christ, it was another change for you all in your relationship. It was so funny because I joke. I mean, we've been married 20 years. I told somebody last year at our marriage conference, we'd been married 19 years. I said, for our anniversary this year, I gave her nine roses. And she said, why is that? I said, well, nine good years. So she threw three of them away and said, well, now it's right. You know, so you see the change that happens and you see what God can do with you even when you're in a mess. I remember sitting on your couch and both of us, looking at you with total honesty, saying, we don't know how this is ever going to work out.

Yeah. We don't trust each other. We don't know how to love each other. We don't know how to talk about good things, much less talk about difficult times. And what we had done was we had isolated ourselves around community. I had nobody around me that was going to give me good advice. I wasn't searching in the word for what it meant to truly be a biblical husband. I wasn't understanding what God wanted me to do when he put that plan in place for us.

And so watching how that's developed now has just been awesome. And so I have made a commitment and tried to every single day to try to honor that and give God glory with that by saying, how can I do more? Because I know you've got a plan. I know you've got a plan to use this. Out of that moment of brokenness, God's really done amazing stuff. Chris, tell us a little bit about your story, just kind of how you came to Christ. And before you ever got to where you're helping other people like you are now. It's very similar.

So I relate with you 100% and the three words I came to mind is I got this, right? I had the same type of mentality. I got this. I did things my way. I didn't care about anything here. I didn't have anybody directing me or got me. And that was really a big part of why we did start the line within us. But I went through a divorce.

My wife left actually. And I had two little girls that were looking at me. You know, she left us, all of us. And they were three and five, right? And when they look at you and say, Dad, what do we do now? man, what are you doing that moment, right? And so I just, I just, I leaned on this and I leaned on my church. And then I had some men there in the church that were able to help me through it.

And then, you know, luckily met my wife now. And she's just been an absolute blessing. And we've, we've sent, we've gone through a lot of stuff too, right? So if you gave her, I mean, you said 20 roses, she kept nine, I think Becca would keep maybe two, you know, if I was being real. But we just spent through some stuff, you know, we lost a child. And there's no pain like kid pain, right? And so we've gone through that.

You know, she's lost jobs. And we just, we've, we've been through some serious setbacks in our marriage, but everything pulled us closer to him. And then now we have two beautiful little, so we had the bigs and the little is what we call. So we have a 12 year old and an 11 year old. And then a 21 month old and a 11 month old. So it's never a dull moment, but it's, it's been, it's been a journey. It's been a journey.

And I never had, you know, men. kind of pulling me and checking me. And, you know, I had a bunch of yes men around me. Right. But never the guys that would just give me the truth, right? The iron, sharpening iron. And I really wasn't ready to be sharpened either. And so, I mean, I just think that's such a big opportunity for us out there that I see the men that I work with.

And, man, we got to have some guys that they're willing to step up and take a stance and stand on the truth and not be scared to go against, you know, the way the world goes. Because the world is broke, the world's divorced and single and lonely. And, man, there's so much a better way. And that piece can only be found right here. That's right. That's great. Great thought. Let's take another break.

So I wanted to talk a little bit just in a general way of this discussion, but beginning with the uniqueness of men the way God made us. Because, let's face it, from a cultural perspective, that's been turned on his head, you know, in terms of uniqueness of men and women. I think it's obviously a ploy of the evil one to blur that. And dad, you and I've talked a lot about this. The idea if you can take away gender and manhood, right? Biblical manhood is in serious jeopardy.

Yeah. Nationwide. I mean, culturally, it's beginning to be a lost sight. I mean, thinking about your children, yours are a little older, John, but, I mean, you've got two young ones. And so what they're going to learn from the world and cultural perspective is not at all what God teaches or what we know to be true. And so I wanted you guys to talk a little bit about that, just raising kids in that environment and how do you teach them the uniqueness of biblical manhood and what that

means and what leadership means and why we shouldn't run away from that, you know, because you hear words like the patriarchy and you hear these kind of, you know, buzzwords in our culture that are always in a negative way, right? And so, you know, I don't know what, John used to. I mean, the biggest thing. is that you're always teaching them, and you have to recognize that. And I know for too long I taught the wrong lessons. And so for me, the first thing that has to be is I can never be a good dad if I'm not a good son of God. And so I, that's, and so then I had to, what I did for a while

was figure out what is a good, what is a good follower of Jesus look like? And for the, and for For me, it's three legs. It's a three-legged stool. It's worship. You know, and I've been blessed to be around some great worship over the years. It's service because, you know, God wants all that I got for him, and I've served in a lot of different capacities, but it's community. And you have to have that community. And some, you know, we're blessed to have it in family.

You know, I mean, some of our family, it's tough at times because of our, the busyness of what we've been saddled with. But that community has been around, it has to be a place where you can be open, where you can be honest, where you can be non-fearful of judgment, and where you can get good, sound, biblical advice. And if you're not looking in those areas, you're going to get the yes-men, which is a dangerous place to be in. And so the men's community was integral to that for us, because there was that openness, there was that honesty,

and there was that looking at things where, you know what, I'm not alone in this. There's somebody else that has done what I've done, has changed and repented of it, and then has righted that ship. And that's been truly awesome. You know what I loved about your three-legged stool is in all three of those cases, you have to be humble. You have to be humble to worship God because He's God I'm not. You have to be humble to serve others because it's not my way.

It's helping them. And you have to be humble in community because if you have to be humble in community, because if you're not willing to give of yourself, you're not going to be a friend to anybody. So I have no friends. I said, well, then you're a terrible friend because when you give to other people, they want you in community. Right. So that's part of that. What would you say to that, Chris, in terms of just the idea of manhood and how you present that.

And not only how you teach your family, but also how you help people in this culture that says, that's a bad word. Yeah. We don't talk about manhood. Well, first of all, they're wrong. I mean, the biggest thing is more than caught in talk. right so i mean you can teach all this stuff in the world and say all this stuff in the world and if if you walk it out differently you're a hypocrite yeah right okay so if you're gonna be a strong man and walk by this that means you have to walk it money through money through Saturday including sunday

there can't be a difference on the guy on sunday and then the guy the rest of the week so that's where it starts and that's where i see the big big disconnect is most these guys if they are involved with a church at all maybe they'll go sit to a sermon but the rest of the week i got this you know they're gonna do it their way when they get baptized they hold their wallet up out the water and they they hold the bedroom at the ward. They don't want God in their bedroom and their money. You know, I just want to go sit to a sermon and check a box. This calls surrendering and commitment.

And there's a big difference when you have to start walking your stuff out, you know, every day of the week. It just comes who you are. Right. No, I agree. Dad, you got to pass his word. It's the scariest text you can run up on. To the Jews who had believed him, this is John chapter 8.

Jesus said, If you hold on to my teaching, you're really my disciples, then you'll know the truth. The truth will set you free. They answered him, we're Abraham's descendants. We've never been slaves of anyone.

How can you say that we shall be set free? Jesus replied, I tell you the truth. Everyone who sins is a slave to sin. A slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed. I know you're Abraham's descendants,

yet you're ready to kill me because you have no room for my word. I'm telling you what I've seen in the father's presence, and you do what you have heard from your father. They said, Abraham is our father. Jesus answered, if you were Abraham's children, then you would do the things Abraham did.

As it is, you're determined to kill me. a man who has told you the truth that I heard from God. Abraham did not do such things. You're doing the things your own father does. We're not illegitimate children, they protested. The only father we have is God himself. Jesus said to him, If God were your father, you would love me.

For I came from God and now I'm here. I've not come on my own. He sent me. Why is my language not clear to you? because you're unable to hear what I say. You, in some of the scariest text I said going in when I read this in the Bible, you belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father's desire.

He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there's no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language. He's a liar and the father of lie. He's talking about the devil. Yet because I tell you the truth, you don't believe me. Can any of you prove me guilty of sin? Any sin.

If I'm telling the truth, why don't you believe me? He who belongs to God hears what God says. The reason you do not hear is that you do not belong to God. So that's a scary text in John 8 on the people Jesus was dealing with Satan is the father of lies and he's the father of murder and all I can say is in these United States

of America and worldwide there's a lot of satanic structure being our manhood like y'all or we y'all are young you're getting on your feet we have to do that and when it has to be seen by the world around us and say, hmm, being kind to your wife, good to your woman,

raising your children right, training them, you know, being thankful to God for his mercy. Once you lose that, you got hell to pay. Lies and murder. Yeah, which is what we see plenty of that, right, in our culture. I'm telling you. Let's take another break. But you all have done well because you all have done these battles.

I'm just showing you that your battle, it's big, big, powerful. So you know the interesting thing about the context, Dad, in John 8 that you're mentioned there, is to Chris's point earlier, that start, right before you started reading, the Bible says they believed in him. And so Jesus' response to them saying, you know what, I think you may be who you say you are, was what dad just read. And so, and then immediately with the rest of that, they didn't really believe in him. You better train them and someone says, well, why should you make sure you train your children coming up?

There's one that was trained. You said, what happened old Jace? That's another one. You said, what about old Willie boy? Well, there's old Willie. Well, then that's about old Jep. You say, there's a Jep. And you look and you say, hmm.

So I'm doing podcasts with my. My sons, y'all are vision as brothers. So we're all members of the same family, meet it here and showing the world. It's a serious thing. Love God. Love your neighbor. It's become quite the task. Yeah, it is.

And we get to share that together. I love, John, so you kind of have a two front, and you may be more than two, two that I know of. front of ministry that you're super engaged in. One is marriage ministry, which is really interesting because we walk through so much together as a young man that God would then choose to use that particular avenue to help you help other people. And you and Megan were part of what we were doing. What I love about it is, you know, you said, I need to be doing this, but I need to do this out

and doing some other place than what you guys are doing. And so you left home base, so to speak, to go and, you said, you said, you. do what you do in our community, and associated with another great church in our community. And I love that because they didn't have that going on before you guys went there. Yeah. Y'all are on the right path. But, you know, y'all are like I call younger books. You got a few few little whiskers of gray, but not much.

Well, there come a time. Anybody younger now than 75. You're a young buck. I'll be 49 this year. I like being able to tell I'm young. Only dad in our world of 50 is young to dad. I saw you when you were just a young. Oh, yeah.

We still remember that old pumpkin seed. That's it. A lot of names and a lot of memories that I guess are laughable. But your face is a lot thinner since you must have lost some weight. Well, we both went to the same fat doctor. He just listened. How many pounds did you? John just did the program.

I noticed his face is a lot narrow. Oh, yeah, yeah. John's kept it off. He's done great with that. You didn't divorce your love of food. No, I didn't divorce my love of food. I just have to do it way differently now. And it was, I got to just, like Willie asked me one time, he said, man, I bet you feel better.

When you go do something outside, I said, man, I feel better. I'll tell my shoes. You know, it's not. It's the most dangerous part of my day. Tie my shoes. I need a footman. This marriage deal has been so awesome because I remember at y'all's retreat when you got an award for ringing the most friends. I think we brought like 10 couple friends.

Yeah. And we met after that. we said, well, we got two options. We can either take this thing over and just get everybody to sign up or we can start it ourselves. And with y'all's help and God's blessing, it's really. Lisa and I got to come speak at your first retreat, which was a humbling thing for us. Well, and it's humbling and scary for us, too, because here we were like my mentor,

my brother, you know, you married Megan and I, you baptized Megan. I mean, all these things going on. I'm like, are we doing this correctly? Are we going to be judged here? going to be acceptable. You took it to another level. But it's just been, it's been really, really cool to see how God's using that. But what's also great, and I know that this was part of his plan, was I started the,

we started the men's really to get into the men's groups probably about seven years before that. So he had to get me right, you know, before he could ever get us right. And that's been been awesome. And that's, that, the, I went to the men's thing reluctant. We were hosting a house church at our house at that point was really successful. I had a lot of people there. But I went just to see what it was about and just being able to be around guys, truly being

honest, open, and wanting to dive into the word and show you how to live this thing out together has been great. Kay told me one time this has been when I was 28 and finally getting myself on the path. She said, you won't change your life. You better change who you're running with. And that's what's been the big difference. I mean, who I'm running with now is people that are going to. Also the same age you were, Dad, when you changed who you ran with.

Somewhere around 27, 28, 29, up to about 32 or three, I just looked one day on everybody who was coming to Jesus through the years. That's the bracket most of them are in. How old are you? They'll say 31. Next one to come to. So how old are you? He said, 28. Next one, 31, 32, 30, 28, 27.

All within that five-year range. All within that five-year range, over and over and over. So an interesting thought came up. I said, I think what it is, by the time you get to be 30 or right at it, you've run with the bad or the good, but that's when you will start to realize that you have a track record. And you look at your track rather, and it's either good or it's bad. Well, most of the time, I was talking.

28, you like had enough of it. Just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, yeah, ironically, Jesus. Ironically, Jesus was 30 when he cranked his up. And, and you've burned up all your first offenses by that time. Yeah, people quit saying, okay, this is going to get better. Yeah. Let's, uh, let's take our last break.

So, Chris, tell us about, uh, line within kind of how that started and kind of what led you to not just to be, able to be a good husband and a good dad, but to want to impact other people. Yeah, keep that up and never look, never look back. Just keep that on your agenda. That's exactly right. Amen, it all starts there, right? Yeah, so, I mean, the line within us, it's a podcast first and foremost, so we just try to get content out every week to serve Christian men,

to be the leaders God intends them to be, and then we build this community. And the community has been unreal, just on how we've been able to serve guys. So it's an online platform where we get guys together and we really just talk about how to be focused on three areas, health, wealth and self. So health is the mind and the body. Wealth as your career and finances and self as being better husbands and better dads. And we just break down different things to training and content and things like that. But the biggest thing is just getting guys together and just have an open dialogue where you're vulnerable.

You're talking about the issues that you're struggling with. To your point, Phil, most of our guys are. our 30 plus because we find the guys in their 20s, they know everything. So we have to lift and figure out they don't know everything, and then they come to us. And man, we've had testimonies of saved marriages.

One gentleman joined in November, put divorce papers in his hand. And went through meeting with us, masterminds, groups like that. We have live events. We pretty much have an event every day. So it's kind of like a buffet. You get to pick and choose what you come to.

And I think about April, she came in, she ripped the divorce papers up, and she came to our last two, couples nights and we have those once a month. And you see stuff like that and it's like it ain't me. You know, it's it's the Holy Spirit doing the work. We're just putting in the work to build the platform because when you're in the lion, it's not like Facebook or these other things where you get all these distractions. Like when you're with us, you know, on the platform working with us, that's what that's what you're going to be focusing on. It's growing in those areas. So it's a

labor. It's a lot of work. It's a labor of love. But it's something we're very passionate about because we see the impact that it's having on others in their community. and it's building leaders so that they can go out and learn the things that we teach them so they can go make an impact in their local communities and start their own men's groups and things like that. So it's been absolutely incredible to see how God's been moving with that. Doing well. Keep that up, my man.

The beautiful thing about all of this is, and that's the one good thing about, we started this in the last podcast, Dad and I talked about our age and the gray whiskers, you know, that come with it, is that you begin to appreciate and realize the impact you've had on people through the years. And not just individually, but then what they were able to do with God's gift and ability and talent to them. And so I think you guys are both examples of that, which is why I wanted to have it on the podcast. And Brian was in the last podcast, second generation, third generation, fourth generation, where we continue to do ministry.

And we're going to do it differently. And we're going to do it in some ways better and some ways more effectively as you go along. but it all starts with somebody teaching you that then you teach somebody else. And so it really is that mindset that kind of goes forward, which I think your example of. And as you believe the word that God gives us, you know, we're created in his image. We're created to want this. The problem is that most men won't back off enough to realize I've got to submit to this and I've got to give it to God and start realizing what's going on.

And when you see that, you want, you desire more. and more and more. And there's a synergy that you just, you don't see until you start doing it. Once you start diving in and asking God to show me what's going on, to be clear about what he has in plan for you, and you see these things that you've done, put into action, the benefit of it is phenomenal. I mean, I tell this all the time in our marriage ministry. When I first started making my changes, I was all in. But for a while, Megan was watching for me to get right back getting to my old habits. How long is this going to take?

This is just a new pair of pants he's got. And sooner or later, he's going to get back in his old ones. It'll be right back where it was. And one of the most hurtful things at the time that I ever realized was we were talking one night, going through our stuff. And I was just sitting there looking at her. And she said, what are you doing? And I said, I'm listening to you.

And she said, no, you don't do that. And I was like, oh, my goodness. And we've been married like eight years at that point. I said, here it is. I've taught her for eight years. years that I have no interest in listening to what you have to say to me. And then as a tough position to be here. Oh, it's terrible.

But it wasn't her that was doing that. It was I had done that. And then once I started changing that, our communication has just been unbelievable. And then like I look back even like, you know, a couple of years ago when dad had a stroke, I'm at the hospital, falling apart, crawling her on the phone saying he's got a brain bleed. They don't know what he's going to do. They're asking me about signing DNR papers. there. You know, what do I do here? This is during COVID, you know, so nobody else could be up there. She's a nurse, by the way, for our listeners. She's a nurse practitioner. So she's like who I lean on.

Well, I remember the spot I was sitting in the ER telling her this. And she said, John, you live your life telling people God has a plan. Now is when you've got to live it out. I looked at my phone. I said, why are you telling this to me? Why aren't you falling apart with me? But like, because we had built that over the years, she was able to pick me up. And I was able to allow her to pick me. up at a time that I needed that. And 10 or 12 years ago, I wouldn't have even allowed that. And she'd have been so fearful to speak on something that might not have been, excuse me, understood the right way. And I just know that that's because of where we've grown in Christ. You better hold on to her. Oh, yeah. Good double hand grip right there. I got to go. Well, and, you know, but what you're describing is so much, we started out by talking about how our culture,

doesn't say, you know, don't, don't give us this patriarchy stuff and Judeo-Christian stuff. And we know you people are abusers and you mistreat women and blah, blah, blah, blah, you know, we get all these things. It's like, the sad thing is nothing could be further from the truth. I mean, I'm sure there's some of that going on out there. But everything we've been talking about today is being selfless. Yeah. Selfless to other people. Selfless to our wives, selfless to our families.

And not selfish. I mean, that's, we want to weed that part out. Right. Do we naturally go for that? Sure. But, I mean, that's the old man. That's the one we put to death. And so there's a complete misnomer of what we're trying to accomplish to help people, which, and I love what you said.

You can't, whether people are going to call your names or not, you've got to do what's right. That's right. And you've got to be consistent. That's right. And you got to be a leader. I mean, and I think to me guys think that, you know, what they can't lead, you know, that they don't know enough or, you know, they're afraid to what people are going to, you know, and ask him about the word, look, God doesn't call to qualify. He qualifies the call, right? So you just

need to lean in. And if you don't lead your family, if you don't lead your spouse, if you don't, you know, try to lead your community, the evil one will. He will take over. And so you've got to lean in, be obedient and take, and understand, you know, you're not going to have all the answers, but some of the beauty of what I've had with my family is when I don't know the answers, let's figure it out together. Right. And let's just go. And then the community that we built, you know, I can drop a question there with these guys. And, you know, you know, know, I don't come in there as the host who knows it all, right? And I think we need to remember, you're in a mission field wherever you're at.

You know, just you were a pastor, you took that field, but I didn't take that field, right? So I took a different route, but we all have an impact on the kingdom. And wherever you find yourself working today, that is your mission field. So get out there and do to work. Yeah, here's an interesting text in that Romans chapter 12. This is what it means to offer your bodies as living sacrifices. Verse 14, 12, 14. bless those who persecute you say what bless and do not curse rejoice with those who rejoice mourn with

those who mourn live in harmony with one another don't be proud not but be willing to associate with people of low position don't be conceded do not repay anyone evil for evil be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody if it's possible Amazing. If it's possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Don't take revenge, friends. Leave room for God's wrath. Do not be overcome by evil to ends us up. He said, but overcome evil with good, which is good, sound advice on the way you all, in due of God's mercy, his death, burial, resurrection, removed our sin, going to raise us from the dead, offer your bodies as living sacrifice as holy and pleasing,

which is an outstanding thing to read every time you get a little maybe saying, well, let's see, me get this thing line back out. Just remember, don't we pay them evil for evil. Just take it and take it on the chin that they don't like you or they hate you. Jesus, they hated him. I mean, and he never made a mistake. So we're going to get a little hatred coming our way from time. It sounds a lot like.

Just love it. them and say, I have to go tell them. Sounds a lot like what Jesus said in Luke 6, which is what we've been talking about. So we're out of time. Appreciate you guys coming on the podcast. Chris, this line within us is what you can Google. Yeah, yeah, V-Line within. That's a great.

Y'all line within. The line within. The line within. That U.S. is the website. Okay. Everything's there. John, we always appreciate you. And we're going to do overtime.

So we'll have a few more minutes. I want to unpack a little bit about that, what dad brought out in Romans 12. So some good stuff in there. So if you guys will stay over with us, blazTV.com slash unashamed is where you go to get this content. So if you want to follow us over, come on. Thanks for listening to The Unashamed podcast. Help us out by rating us on iTunes.

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