Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - 01/07/14 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #139

Episode Date: January 7, 2014

Jim Handy calls in to talk about writing your goals for the new year. This podcast is brought to you by: Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout. Hulu Plus. Visit Huluplus.com/joey for an extended free trial. Dollar Shave Club. Visit Dollarshaveclub.com/church for great deals. Nature Box. Visit Naturebox.com and use promo code Joey for 50% off your first order. Recorded live on 01/07/2014.

This show is sponsored by Hulu Plus. Hulu Plus lets you binge on thousands of hit shows anytime anywhere on your TV, PC, smartphone or tablet. Support this podcast and get an extended free trial of Hulu Plus when you go to huluplus.com slash joey that's huluplus.com slash joey and by dollarshaveclub.com. Get a high quality razor sent to your door every month for a fraction of what you pay at retail. Go to dollarshaveclub.com slash church that's dollarshaveclub.com slash church or just go to joeyds.net and click on the dollarshaveclub banner. This show is also sponsored by NatureBox where you can order great tasting healthy snacks right to your door. Snacks smarter in the new year with healthy and delicious treats like french toast

granola. Support this podcast and get 50% off your first order. Go to naturebox.com and use promo code joey. That's naturebox.com promo code joey. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Lisa Ayat with a little striped shirt on today. Oh shit motherfuckers. Bring it. Tuesday, January 7th. The Cuban fucking Christmas. Today you're gonna nimble over the shit. Oh shit. It's 2014. You woke up in that fucking bed with lysing your fucking head and you're like how did I get here? What? What's the story Lisa Ayat? There's no story. What the fuck Lisa Ayat? What the fuck you've been cocksucker? Been in Boston in New York. It's fucking cold. Like a fucking snowman you were over there walking around with you. Happy New Year cocksuckers. Namaste. Ching Long Ho. I don't know how to

fuck the same many languages. We're back bitches. A fucking long sabbatical. We're back. I'm happy you're here. I'm happy you're healthy. I'm happy there were no fucking catastrophes this year. Maybe you got your dick sucked by a transvestite New Year's Eve. But who gives a fuck you're here today? What's the story with you cocksucker? Nothing dude. It was a fun trip back. I feel bad for everyone stuck in the airports because when I got back from I when I got back to LA there were people sleeping in the terminal. So if you got stuck in an airport I'm sorry. Luckily I got out. Did they have cocks? No. Fuck it. They were sleeping on the side of the on the right against the wall. Like fucking communists. So I'm glad I got out but sorry if you guys didn't. Thank you to Anthony

from the Palms. I didn't get to go. We were right in the restaurant but then the snow started in New York so we had to leave. But thank you for for being very nice. He was going to deliver food to the hotel for us but we we left the night at the hotel early just to get back. Make sure we made it back to Boston. Did you get to the restaurant? We made it into the restaurant and the snow started coming and we left to catch the first train. The last train. It was fucking but it was funny because I called Lee and they go Lee don't fuck around the snow scum. He's like hey man it's going to be funny degrees. On Sunday it is. That's when I got out. Let me tell you something Lee when you're in that fucking east coast and you're out there dabbling in January do you know how many fucking

January's and I never got caught in an airport overnight. I did get caught in the bus station a couple fucking nights and that's brutal and that stays with you for the rest of your fucking life. And it's being it's okay being stuck but being stuck fucking broke is another thing. You know how bad you feel sleeping at the fucking hotel when you just and here's the problem you already gave them me a luggage. Yeah so you can't even get your fucking luggage to go to a hotel. I was wondering that they don't give it back. I don't think so it takes like an hour or you got to go to a terminal can you fucking imagine that shit man. There are people that are stuck for a week. If I didn't get my flight back on Sunday they told us straight straight to the face you won't get back until

next Thursday and they flew a pilot in they flew a pilot in and when we got on the plane the pilot came on the intercom he said everyone sit the fuck down. I have 40 minutes left on my union thing. If we don't take off in 40 minutes I can't go. So everyone sat down and we got off but it was packed. Yeah there were a couple seats but it was just because like some people like there was no single people who would go in the middles but it was pretty busy. No it's uh it's uh this time of the year man. I gotta go to fucking Buffalo on Thursday. You want to talk about polar bears and fucking Puerto Ricans getting stabbed. I gotta go to Buffalo and there's no direct flights to Buffalo. They're trying to get direct flights to go to Buffalo. They can't Delta and I think

America the only ones that fly to Buffalo was some shit and you gotta go to Chicago or Minnesota and those are both two fucking ice packs. Well at least not going through JFK where the plane slid off the runway. I was in Chicago the one year where the fucking plane slid off the fucking runway into the fence. I can't imagine. No, no, no, no, no. So that's the thing right now. So Buffalo get your tickets get ready but don't be surprised if there's no helicopters to fucking put it. It was a nice you know man. And yesterday I was talking to the girl that takes care of the baby and she's from uh El Salvador, Juana you know and we were talking and she goes you know it's uh she goes I used to spend my Christmases here but I don't do them no more because they

were just too fucking boring. Yeah. Christmas in California it's kind of the fucking boring. Well that's why I love it. No one's here so there's no traffic or anything but well it's on the boring side uh it's quiet you know there's parking for a few weeks like nobody's here yet. Nobody's here yet. Yeah. A lot of people are stuck you know and but a lot of people don't come in listen if I if I made money I wouldn't fucking work I would be in New York from the 15th to the 15th. That's what John Lennon would do. That's what real pimp does. I wouldn't deal with this shit you know New York and there's really not much to do in New York or anything like that right now anyway after the holidays but you're forced to stay there not to deal with the fucking flying.

Are you with me? Do you know what I'm saying? So that's what I that's the only way I could justify going home for Christmas but I miss the Christmases in the east coast. You know people think that you know you're out here and the the thing I want to talk about the most is sacrifice that nobody wants to sacrifice little fucking things anymore and I talk to people and I'm surprised I get fucking reactions from people like really and listen man when I moved out of here when I left New Jersey I left New Jersey in the middle of all those stories I tell you know those crazy stories I tell and they're crazy and they're fucking hilarious they're hilarious when I think about that because we were just getting funny every time we went out

I don't remember half the shit I really don't I remember going out one night and watching the you know January watching like 48 hours and laughing our asses off you know there was a guy freezing in a bus station and we pulled up at the car and my friend goes look at that poor guy and he lowers the window and he calls the moment he goes go home before you scare somebody you know we just laughed and I remember leaving that I remember going to Christmases in the east coast where there's fucking you walk into people's houses there's cookies and there's fish and there's Christmas music and people drinking eggnog and they're going listen let's go down to the corner because Louis house they're smoking pot in the yard and then you cross the street to Vinnie's house

because they're snorting blow in the garage you know this guy's got a turkey they're roasting you know it's like a neighborhood thing here people even have fucking lights on their houses no like in studio city nothing I didn't see that feeling you know what I did for Christmas Eve I got invited to a friend's house oh you went to Christmaseve I went over your house at the beginning early and then I went to uh to the girlfriend's house and we did a Mexican New Year's Eve I'm at Christmas Eve how was that see they lived it up oh they are crazy how many farts did you blast out the next fucking day oh fucking what did you eat what was your spread on tamales it was it was where's the tamales you got them left you threw them away no I finished them before I left

I was supposed to fuck but so they had green chili ready tamales cheese and sweet I just fuck with the chili ready that's my favorite that's my favorite I like the other two but I had those then they made this corn sauteed with the jalapenos fucking delicious I tell I told my girlfriend because we were going to my mom I said listen my mom is a good cook but Mexico like this Mexican food is like you just add extra flavor to it so it's different um so they had that and then we got we just drank I brought beer and uh and uh tequila not tequila I brought beer and the girl wanted something fruity I brought that over and me and the racist one you bring over tequila no no no but the mom the mom wanted corona so I brought corona over the mom and I

each had a few coronas we played this fucking weird luck to Lutoria it's like a being a Mexican bingo but it's from like the 1950s so one of the one of the little squares was on the grito little black man and the drunker the mom got the faster she was calling and I don't speak Spanish so they were they were howling because I was behind I had to ask what was getting called and I won a couple times and they they they bet it was that was and like I got a couple cool gifts from them and I gave the I gave the mom a book she really wanted to give me a hug it was it was a fun it was probably one of the better christmas seeds I've had in a while so you're on a warm Spanish fucking family yeah I got around these fucking wonderbread motherfuckers but let me ask you this

shake hands and have you seen and apparently it's something in the hood they put tinfoil around trees outside have you seen that for what for Christmas I don't understand if you go to Englewood there's dry people doing the Mexicans whoever in the neighborhood probably both they put tinfoil on trees and little women's and I turned to Paul I said what's that he's like oh that's just what they do I've never seen that before like an entire tree's wrapped in tinfoil I didn't know if it was something you've heard of before or not I think it's something done the fucking hood no no no hey listen you learn it's amazing the different cultures I went to a person's house that there was a lot of people there I think I went from like five to seven well didn't you go to your uncles

I went to my uncle's Christmas morning okay this was Christmas Eve I went to the to the friend's house George and you know this year Christmas was a little better because of mercy yeah but it still never sunk back in but it was fun with her it was fun to see it you're in for a lot in six months on the way back in the terminal there was an 18 month old and she was yapping and running around oh and she and she knew she knew when she was getting people she said tushy and she saw us laugh she looked around she said it again and she pulled her pants down a little bit to show her butt so and so you have six months left I think and no no it's already starting though yeah it's crazy yesterday was the first time she saw Wana in two and a half

weeks like she's really close to me she's really close with my wife she fucking ran up to Wana gotta put her head on Wana's shoulder and just rubbed her chest Wana had tears in her eyes Wana goes I thought she's gonna forget me no that little girl has already got balls of steel you know when I was leaving already this morning I heard her in there yelling da da da da da my wife's like don't open that fucking door you know I could hear my wife on the other side don't encourage it yeah but I put her head down until 7 30 my wife doesn't have to work today but all and all was a fucking good holiday you know I mean you do the best the thing about me I hate about holidays this is in our situation in our situation is that everything shuts down I can't get an answer

Lee no you can't get an answer after Thanksgiving yeah and you can't get an answer I remember last year we had this lady who approached us for sponsors and she called me like all through December she kept telling me you know I have this I had this and I never heard from her again until like February 3rd and by that time we had jumped ships because I thought she was just a lazy woman and I bumped into her she goes you know in January nothing happens I go maybe in your fucking world because your husband is a millionaire but in our world shit happens yeah shit happens all the fucking time and it's you know I today I got to do looping for a fucking movie you know ADR it's January fucking 5th it's the second day of the year business wise I'm already looping for a

fucking movie wow yeah that's when I booked my plane home I auditioned yesterday wow I didn't go because I just wasn't in the fucking but that's the only two weeks I booked it when I was still when I still had a job and that's the only two weeks you get off you don't get paid for it but from like the 15th to today or yesterday I guess nothing happens everyone's fucked up were you a grudge match with the premiere with the savages from only give a shout out to everybody who fucking came from John Salami to Eddie Bravo to Lee to Felipe Esparza that was one of the warmest nights of my fucking life that was fucking like 60 people showed up like 60 fucking people showed up and you know what we didn't take pictures nobody shot documentaries I'm so fucking lazy with

that fucking camera I can't put it in my pocket no more Lee even when I have it in my fucking pocket I won't take it out this one it's course yeah for me it has I don't know what it was I don't know what I hate going back to things like once I do something and to me it runs its course I had a great time doing the mad flavors world but I even put it in my pocket for the premiere I couldn't take it out the fucking premiere yeah you know I put it in my pocket for something else recently oh for the Joe Rogan thing when we went to Vegas that was a lot of fun thank you for the people from the church that came up to me and asked for Lee and the thing I think you need to do is vying or the Instagram videos they're short the vine in six seconds the Instagram is 15 and you just

hold it and it automatically goes up I can show you how to do that that's vine mine yeah and Instagram has video yeah and the vine is six seconds Instagram is 15 I think that's what you should I think that's the next step because I I tried I did it in San Francisco it just showed you on stage and people like that but the they're having the camera because I know you get self-conscious with the like especially if De Niro saw it like that's why I surprised you took a little video of you with him I think you thought you were guys were taking a picture right I think the guy who took the picture thought we'll take okay it wasn't really video the guy who took the picture I thought he knew so okay I'm not good with that stuff Lee I listen I don't I never dreamed of a day where

I'm embarrassed to take a picture with somebody I'm embarrassed to go up to somebody for a year and a half I want to take a picture with Chuck Liddell took me a year and a half in a hallway with me and him we're alone to finally ask him I felt so bad in front of people you know yeah it always surprises me how somebody come up to me going hey you want to take a picture because it fucking it takes everything I have in me you know me oh I would never wait in line I mean and it's still it still makes me not uncomfortable but I'm I understand why they want pictures with you I still understand why they want pictures with me no no they want pictures with everybody everybody in this society everybody wants pictures with everybody this is not you with me we don't

they don't give a fuck about us they just want fucking pictures with everybody which is kind of of weird you know I was talking to the guy who's going to call today Jim Handy's calling me he's going to talk about goals like did you write your goals out for the year cut something I'll put them in my head no you got to write them out yeah I gotta try that your fucking head that's all I need uh it's amazing how I didn't tell this to anybody and my buddy called you they guide Tabasco I think he's calling to the podcast early on he's a mailman in Seacork we're talking about he goes he took his tongue to see grudge match and when I went the second time because I had to go the first time the second time

to the third time with you and I can't watch it again I'm sure it's a mental fucking breakdown time for me but it's so weird he said Coco I'm sitting there with my son and I'm watching this and I'm thinking about us snorting fucking blow and you know you robbing the house across the street knocking on my door and all this shit and I'm thinking about how this happened like that's why I played that song to the talking heads because how the fuck do you get here you know he goes how the fuck did we were just laughing Terry was in the car and I was driving and he called so I had to take the call and I was you know my wife was hearing this shit with the baby in the back and and I go you know there was a point in the movie when I was sitting there next to Lee

that I didn't know if Lee knew what I was watching and when he was watching was I was on the gummy bear so I didn't I was fucked up your eyes were so fucking redly but it felt like when I first went to see it Lee this is what it felt like it felt like it was somebody else's body with my head on it and only I could see it but you didn't see it you saw something different like that's how high I was or what the weed has done to my mind my thwarted mind over the year that I kept looking at myself in the premiere and the second time I went to see it I I didn't think people were watching me I thought they were seeing somebody else do you know what I'm saying no you ever see the movie oh god you devil no it's with burns the little

guy burns and he comes to you you're a musician and you if any cuts you a deal and now you become and there's one of them I don't know which one it is where the guy's like a springsteen guy and this he sees this guy that has a family the wife is pregnant and he's struggling he goes to him one day and he sells him his soul and then the guy wants to come back he wants to get out of it but he would go to the same restaurant if they'd see the woman now that he got pregnant with the Bruce Springsteen guy that sold his soul and now he's in hell okay with his kid you know because that's what happens when you saw your soul I mean it's an interesting movie but the guy at one scene he was watching his videos and he goes this is surreal this isn't me you know and that's what I

kept thinking about in the movie feel like this isn't really me even after the third time you saw yeah like even when I was sitting there with you I'm like Lee isn't seeing what I'm seeing I'm seeing me but he's seeing somebody else up there he's seeing like somebody who looks different no that's why that's why the entire theater cheered when you first came no Lee I know that it's a state of mind no I understand what you're saying I could never ever believe that that was really me up there yeah like when I was sitting there looking at fucking Da Nero Lee and I'm sitting on that scene with the chair and I look over I can't believe that's me no I still fucking cannot believe it like it it's amazing and I'm telling you guys that listen to the podcast at home I still can't

believe it's fucking me Lee and it makes me laugh inside if they only knew you know yeah that's why the funniest the funniest thing of the night was when we were talking outside and smoking this old this nice old couple came up to you because they recognized you from the thing and they were very nice to them but they said to you do you still wait us weekly and you I was waiting for someone but you said no that's just what they give us but I was like he's standing out here on about four fucking edibles Eddie Bravo and Felipe Esparza are cracking jokes and they said are you still reading us weekly magazine I was like those are the same people you see walking Hollywood Boulevard taking pictures of those superheroes you know what I'm saying yeah

so you gotta fucking forgive what happened last night with the game that was a crazy game I don't really watch college football and I just had it on because I'm looking for apartments but I watched the last little bit the the I don't know from what I get Auburn is like America's team that came back they beat Alabama and in Florida State is the guy who won the Heisman's on it but they didn't really have that great of a schedule and Auburn the underdog was winning the entire game until the second half and the thing that got Auburn into this game was a returned field goal for touchdown and the thing that beat them was a returned kickoff for touchdown so it was a crazy game I know Zagura and Krasher were there I'm sure Vegas went to the game yeah Zagura and Krasher

went to the game yeah no credit the Florida State is Krasher school okay I know him and Ricky Cruz a bunch of guys yeah yeah so I'm sure Vegas made millions upon millions a fucking different story you've never seen a bookie with a part-time job Vegas always opens the fucking year yeah in the black they don't give a fuck we say it like us it's 2014 cock suckers fuck the coffee get out there get a gun get a knife get your fucking one adds get out there cock sucker where's that Sabbath you're gonna play for uncle Joey shit what the fuck we say it's all over you gotta polish that fucking sword today bitches oh shit the fucking thunder old school for you cock suckers it's 2014 right your fucking goals what do you want to do this year I want to jump

up and down I want to get my post smoke I want to lose 14 pounds I want to make it to the school fucking band what's the story where's the reef where's the guerrilla business what happened I don't know where to bring them back from Boston and shit they don't have a shit there they be recognized in Boston maybe come up can you say you're the flying juke no no no I put I was in the prune have you ever been there the prenatal center it's like a mall yeah I put up there that Paul and I had like an hour before we had to leave but no some people said they were there earlier but no I didn't see anybody um it was it was a great trip introduced the mom to the girl which was great I've got gold

great I mean did you both sleep in the same house yeah same bed well like it's my uh it's not the house where I grew up and I'm never there so my mom just has two twin beds for whenever my brother and I are there so she pushed those together so that was weird but uh I got my first sex knock I don't know if you listen to Ari's podcast but in New York he said he's been getting a lot of knocks on the doors on the walls and we were having sex in New York on uh the day after New Years at like one in the morning we got this and it it's just it killed the mood a little bit but we just started howling laughing because we got a knock on the thing so that was fun no that was the highlight of the trip the goal of sex you know what I'm saying yeah and you went to the

fucking the baseball hole of fame where'd you go no Fenway Park the baseball hole of fame what the fuck they ain't no fucking Fenway Park yeah that was fun that was a you sent me the picture caught my fist yeah I had a tear in mind did you rub it mm-hmm you rubbed it for good luck the only thing that was a little bit meh is they uh it's getting more commercial so they were playing high school hockey games in the middle of it so like you you couldn't really get the full part of it but it was still cool we got to stand on the monster which was awesome and it's amazing and to me like I'm not even a Boston Red Sox fan for that degree but it's amazing I'm like Johnny come lately I've gotten on the boat oh yeah Boston one and the same thing with the fucking yet

yes you gotta have some fucking dignity in your life all right all of a sudden you put a boss where the fuck were you when they were losing where the fuck were you when Bill Buckner the ball went between his legs you were somewhere jumping up and down with your friends cheering on some other fucking winner you fucking mook I hate that shit and they all put their hats it's like this new trend that's going on I take my daughter to the park every day at some point because you gotta let the energy out she fucking rolls she gets dirty knees her hands get dirty she loves the mud you know and there's always these fake fucking dads there's always these dads come with flip flops and you know with this Boston and they all have a Boston Red Sox hat always like twisted

in the brim so you can't see who they are and they have like the backpack with the water and they always play like I'm the best fucking dad in the world but I noticed they're all the fake Boston Red Sox people like I know people who cried when Boston don't have a good season and I couldn't figure out why but I really know I know people who cried Josh Wolf gets very upset John Barone gets very I know people who don't talk for three or four days I don't get that concept I've never understood that concept I just I cry over people get hit by a car yeah cat getting fucking you can always tell if it's a clean hat than our real fan look at Lee and the clean the pink hat pisses me off a little bit but it's not it doesn't really finally you're fucking telling me about

this shit see thank god but I thought I was the only fucking moron it's so fucking expensive to get into Fenway like the bleachers are 40 bucks so it's you kind of take away and I tried to go to a Celtics game with the girl and they suck now but the highest up was like a hundred bucks so it kills you now but um no I mean I I always but I always like it when I see a Red Sox hat I like I like look at the guy makes me happy I don't know what if I feel like I've got connected a little bit so every time I see it out here I hope they're from Boston but I'm sure some of it's just um I still not like my hockey hats and then years ago I didn't even know this about 10 years ago I read what the Yankees made just on hats every year oh god oh my god and I nearly fuck I don't

know what that what it was this is like 98 or something like that Steinbrenner was still alive yeah like Steinbrenner had a division well have you seen how much the shirts are for them and the like I an airport back I was I saw a Red Sox shirt I liked 50 bucks like it's just a just a little t-shirt they I mean they they mark it up but people buy it my mom last year my mom bought me a Patriots jersey for when I went to the game last year that was 150 bucks and and people people never stop wearing them people have thousands of them it's a man but they have all these uh web pages now like Jonathan Jonathan Wolf my buddy he had a thing where Overstock.com type of the I forget what the name

of his web pages he usually listen to the podcast I'm sorry Jonathan Wolf I'll give you a free plug next time and uh you know he was getting all that stuff 10% over and they were dirt cheap you know listen the Boston Red Sox shirt is a Boston Red Sox shirt you know I can't see pain you know sometimes people look at me and they go well he's a fucking dinosaur that's why he acts like that towards certain activities no I love fucking sports I don't like what they've done to sports I love comedy I don't like what they've done to comedy I don't listen man I love comedy clubs and I love that people want to go I don't understand why and I know some of these comedians want to absorb an amount of fucking cash a movie theater is supposed to compete with a comedy club

I'm sorry a comedy club is supposed to compete with a movie theater a movie's $12 and that's a lot but I understand we want the high five we want the high death we want the best sound we want cushy fucking conscious this place is that you can still go to for three dollars but you smell somebody else's fart in the fucking cushion as soon as you sit down they go wow it's like a fucking organ a fucking stink that comes out yeah so you know I always thought but you know these people go to a fucking uh people don't give a fuck about giving you their money people don't give a fuck about it they're having a good time but nobody wants to go home and go wow you know four years ago I was doing Gray Drake's podcast you know Gray Drake the chick from rotten

tomatoes okay and she said I really like it if you picked a movie and went to see a new movie because you talk about a new movie and an old movie Lee I didn't fucking think about this shit let's pretend I'm 45 or 44 years old I never thought about this shit Lee and I'm with my wife we live in Hollywood I told her I have to go to this Disney movie and she goes let's go down there and it's uh the fox and something whatever I don't know when I go to the arc light okay I go to the arc light and I had a hundred dollar bill you know and I cast it and I got home that night and I remember throwing my money on the table and there was a 20 and a 10 and a few quarters yeah and I said to my wife nothing nothing I'm not angry Lee by no means I just dropped 70 dollars to go

to the movie she goes well we went for coffee and you had that bagel after we're like all right so 15 so we went 55 fucking dollars it was a good movie Lee I enjoyed it but I didn't justify the 55 fucking dollars well it didn't but it's kind of what I want is it's kind of different so I took the bus to New York and I took the train home from New York it's like going to the three dollar movie theater or going to the arc light there's things now that you have a little bit of money and it's going to a better comedy club I would rather pay now now that I know I'm gonna pay 100 bucks for the train rather than 30 for the bus because the bus was was garbage I would rather pay I took that bus from Boston to New York many times it was tremendous it's 25 bucks

and it's two hours I mean you can't it's like a plane ride you have to think of a plane ride when I fly from New York to Buffalo yeah I like the best seat for my money I use my miles I try to upgrade when I go from fucking point A to point Z I fly Southwest no offense in Southwest I want to give him a shout out they just made me a A plus member so now I can cut no yeah what what do you what do you get let me tell you someone you're an A plus member in fucking Southwest you're slinging dick bitch okay shit's gonna start cracker lacking for you you know Southwest is cheaper than fuck now used to be eight round trip tickets and you got a free ticket you know many round trip tickets I've gotten the last two years I've got no guts but they made me an A

list plus which means I cut through the fucking line I go through the business select now I get those type of digits I'm saying I'm gonna show this was important but like the bus I took I don't know if I tweeted the picture this girl was sitting next to me with food but the train it's still nice there's you sit next to people there's internet there's plugs there's a food car so what you're saying about the arc light yeah you could go to the $10 movie but you're sitting next to people you have the bad popcorn the floor sticky the arc light you go the guy comes in there's no babies talking though you can get a little drink hold on one second I left this conversation go where I didn't want it to go as far as the arc light what I'm really talking about

is sports oh yeah yeah what they've really done to sports and Lee I don't give a fuck about you or me we're adults okay I don't give a fuck about you or me not being able to go to a baseball game I'm talking about that 12 year old that really is a fan of big poppy yeah that wants to play baseball that really is a fan of the picture that really is a fan of you know this is a dream fan have you ever had a dream have you ever gone to a baseball game and said fuck for about a year I thought I was gonna be the next fucking Pete Rose well I knew I was never gonna be Pete Rose but Fenway's the best my favorite place in Barney yeah it's your favorite place in the fucking world I went there 20 years ago when you walk in there you smell baseball yep now they're not letting kids

go to that they cut their legs off well I can't imagine if you had a 40 fucking dollars lead do the math go ahead yeah do the math it's 160 just to get in so four people the little girl little boy you and your wife go ahead drop that's 160 but parking has to at least be 40 I would imagine parking for the UFC in New Jersey was 50 dollars wow okay so that's 200 then each kid wants a foam finger that has to be at least 10 each so 20 a hot dog is 10 each then drinks are 10 each then you have to get a popcorn you're probably spending four or 500 bucks I would imagine for the last you know every year till I met you and even after I met you for you I went to two later dodger games a year yeah that's what I can tolerate I live in LA nothing wrong with driving up there

and going and getting the hot dog and shitting and getting your stomach sick and walking around but you sit there for four or five innings to me that's success four or five innings I giggle I clapped me Felipe his wife my wife my uncle you know I wasn't doing that with tons of money I was going to Costco I was I'm not ashamed to say this shit I pay for Costco every fucking year I pay 100 something dollars to the membership so it's 50 bucks you get two tickets you get two hot dogs and two sodas every time I went they upgraded me to a level above there were great tickets you know what the fuck I was having a great time Magic Johnson takes over I don't have no more fucking tickets from Costco I didn't go to a dodger game this year

oh they took that out they took that out well they paid they paid a billion dollars for the team so when they when they say that when they when you hear that on the radio that they paid a billion that means they think they're gonna make a trillion in 10 years you know what kills me is that like I said listen I lost all that emotion when I realized that life was more important than I had to go after it at a young age I lost my lust I still get caught watching some baseball if I'm watching classic sports on ESPN they show the Boston Red Sox I stopped what the fuck I'm doing I stopped what the fuck I'm doing I say you know what I deserved this break and I watched three innings and I get teary-eyed and I remember when I watched that game the first time

and oh my god it's Rico Pretoschelli oh my god it's Lynn whatever his name is lince one yeah is it lince one yeah I think so no lince one's the receiver oh fred lin is it fred lin something I don't fucking know when I watch these guys I get emotional you know same thing when I watch an old sense it's amazing do you I can't fucking believe I'm not a Cincinnati red fan no more I don't even know what their record is I don't know who's on the team when I was a kid I had everything Cincinnati yeah everything everything Cincinnati I didn't have the shirt but I had the jacket with the sea on it and the whole rows in the back I had everything you know I can't imagine how kids can't go to these fucking things they don't we didn't go to our parents when

I was a kid yeah well my mother to a bunch of mech games and I went to a bunch you know what I really never went to Yankee games as a kid I was more of a mech guy but after that there was a there was a big slogan in New York take the train to the plane okay so you can take the train to Kennedy airport in LaGuardia that plane also took you to uh Shea Stadium for three dollars they had a special ticket like if the airport was seven if you're going to Shea and you're showing me a your baseball stud it's three fucking dollars they forced you they gave you a special deal to take the train and for guys like us it was a party you smoke the joint you drink a few beers you know yeah and then you got there and you got a ticket for 2250 and you sat in the Puerto

Rico section but you snuck down and you stayed for six innings you got a little drunk then you went to the Bronx and got a package it was just an excuse but it was an excuse that you were going to drop that thirty dollars anyway why not go to a fucking mech game yeah now that budget sends me right the fuck out of there so I mean I would just rather watch it on tv at this point and not not Fenway but like but I mean it's uh it's getting to a point no it sucks I listen I can't let everybody look when you go to a UFC and you go to it live it's two different fucking situations oh yeah you know when they play the music at the beginning of the UFC and the organs and the fucking the who and they're showing fucking kicks and people flying through the fucking land speaking of

which what do you think about the last UFC I can I conned a couple friends and her to go see all I saw was the main event so Wanda Rousey is fucking I'm a huge fan I always root for her I don't care I don't want my fighter to shake someone's hand at the end I liked her I was just waiting for the arm bar and after I think it was like the second round they like she was closed but the third round it was just over I like really quickly but fucking that Anderson Silva kick we watched it at a Dave and Buster's because like it's just everywhere else like this I tried to go I called a couple sports bars in Boston they were they were charging a $20 cover charge to watch it do you know that Edgar and Becky went to Vegas and they were

charging 75 miles ahead to go into the casinos to watch the fight so yeah so I mean but the fucking the first round we had him and see him for most of it but he uh Silva wasn't doing the thing and then that kick there was a it was me and my my friends didn't really watch it and there was a black table about 20 feet away and they erupted and it was almost immediately they had little short videos of it online seeing someone's leg break like that I was speechless I was at dinner with my wife and I uh we got our dinner it was her birthday and we ran over the red bands oh hold on we'll finish this later Jimmy Jam

good morning you got him yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah what's happening Uncle Jim well I was just out of the shower and a little while ago and just getting out here just getting cranked up today you watched that little monkey you got ready for today what's that you watched that little monkey you're getting ready oh yeah yeah he's cleaning you very roll what's happening baby tell me something what's going on in your life oh my life well you know the middle of still a bit of mom drama stuff but I got a great girlfriend the doctor runs a clinic he's a CEO of a clinic in Baltimore but through the University of Maryland and uh three years this month we've been hanging out she was just out here for Christmas

kind of lover so it's good she's got 19 year old she's graduated the University of Washington so it's uh cool to hang around a 23 year old from time to time very full of energy and wonderful stuff you working no just kind of laid back figured I'm gonna just kind of just hang out for a while you're living on your many millions yeah beautiful just the interest of course you know uh Jim it's a new year you know and I always think about I mean I've known you since 1988 correct 89 around there 88 89 yep and uh I picked up a skill that you taught me years ago and at this time of the year I really get serious about it you know uh most people I mean my year is done Christmas the 26th when I wake up on the 26th I kind of wake up in a bad mood I kind of wake up and I thank

God for everything he gave me and everything I put together but at the other end I know that I slipped at some places you know throughout the year and you sit there and you go you know I got to tighten this up I got to write more I should have been finished with this fucking book Lee I should have been finished with this fucking book you know and every day I try to write a sentence and it's not enough you know and what I'm trying to get to it's it's goals and I got that from you working at the Toyota place that it all begins with goals it all begins with that thought and I just asked Lee I go Lee did you think about your goals for the year did you write them down and no I go did you get your goals for the year and he goes I got them in my head and my answer was

that he's shit the power of the pen you know and yeah the power of the written word it's it's just way too powerful to ignore you can't do that or you it's just you know you're you're not helping yourself and you're on the road of frustration it's just amazing how I picked that up from you and through all my coke binges and drinking and all that shit I still did that I still found time at night when I was coked up coming down from the coke that I would write like my goals tomorrow I will not do coke you know how will I do these things I will I will not scam money I will not think about you know it just starts that simple like it's that fucking simple and I want you to explain what you know what you told me 30 years ago you know 20 years ago well that's the that's

the power of it is the simplicity of it and there's you know you know Joan we used to talk about uh you know all this a lot and I was really big on it and in in life there's two kinds of pain and I mean if you want to get anywhere and there's the pain of discipline of doing it of getting up and you're you know you're you're you're cranked up and uh whether what go whatever you're cranked up on and either to uh get yourself focused on to get out of the situation or to get into a situation and there's two kinds of pain with that there's the pain of discipline of doing it and doing it day in and day out and reviewing it it only takes five minutes and then the second kind of pain is a pain of regret and that's the worst and it's a pain it's it's that regret for not doing it

and years go by weeks go by whatever days go by and your uh your goals you know you're you're uh call them what you want but they slip away from you and then you've got that regret god if I only would have spent the 10 minutes and uh you know digging into it up front takes some time and what I want to talk a little bit about today is the is the uh uh is the digging into the why you're doing it and it's it it seems simple well I'm you know I got a goal of uh you know everybody's got a goal to make more money okay good goal uh actually a pretty weak goal but uh it's always in the top 10 anyway and but you have to dig if you have to dig into it the why but why do you want to make more money well I'll be able to buy

more things but why do you want to buy more things well because it'll make me feel better well why do you need to feel better you know what I mean uh dig into it dig down dig down deeper uh as to the the uh why you want to do something but you know just writing it down I want to car um well you're probably not going to get there you need to know yourself you have to convince yourself you have to buy into it as to why you want to do that what's it going to do for you is it going to do is it is it a uh um and it can be as simple as um I just want to ask your car because it'll make me feel better okay well that's a that's digging deep into it uh uh and you can't uh you can't stop there and uh but I'm you know by the same token you can't

overload your ass either I want to make a million bucks well you know let's let's start with uh a raise that's what we're getting up in the fucking morning yeah I used to have a picture I used to have a picture of a testarosa on my wall in 87 and 88 and I would say you know 300,000 for a car how the fucking I'm going to make 300,000 and just buy it like I didn't know that I had to make a million dollars to drive a 300,000 dollar car I was just going to buy a 300,000 dollar car like I had no fucking purpose and I never got the testarosa so that that mind frame didn't work you've got to you know you've got to be realistic about it and uh you know you've got to push yourself as well and you can make a list of you know for me I usually make a list of about 15 things

of that and it's what I'm working on this week and uh I was reviewing last year's and one of my goals last year was to move back to California and I thought that uh you know at the point in time there was no way it just was an unrealistic goal and I had things in in Baltimore my girlfriend holy cow how am I going to you know break the news to her although she and I've been talking about it since you know since we got together and yet I've had it on my list for the last four years and uh again I didn't overload myself I didn't get uh all cramped up behind it when it didn't happen and for the first couple years I knew it wasn't going to happen but I had to keep it on there because Joe you never know you never know you focus on something you write it

down you look at it every day think that the universe will just bring ideas it'll just start to circulate it's like an idea you know you said uh somebody comes up with a product on on you know you see some infomercial on tv and you go I thought of that two years ago well once you get it out into the cosmos it becomes an idea somebody's going to grab it and run with it and it might as well be you you're right no no you're right man I mean uh I live my life off this shit I do monthly I do weeklies it's amazing that my weeklies are not like the things that I want Jim they're the things I need to do so on like today if you go to my notebook it'll say podcast uh I have the 10 o'clock I have this I'll do an hour writing and I'll tell you what at the

end of the night I look at that list and subconsciously throughout the day I'll check it off just check it off yeah my goal for the week I'm 50 years old my goal for the week now is I go to two jujitsu's a week and two kettlebell classes they're fucking murder Jim every time I go that I hug my cats and I hug my wife I think I don't kind of come back I'm gonna have a heart attack and I find myself getting on a plane on Thursday going oh my god I'm 50 and I went to all four workouts I'm a little sore but I'm taking Thursday off and Friday I'll work out at the hotel and it's basically because I write it down well you keep trying you keep slugging and uh you know a book I read uh I don't know a couple

years ago Michael Jordan's book uh I love the name of it it's uh I can't um I can't accept not trying that's the title of this book and if you talk about failure he did he got cut from his the high school basketball team because he wasn't good enough and uh he had to go back at it and and get the skills and uh drill down into it and and he figured out why he wanted to do it it's uh uh it's that y factor of uh writing it down concentrating on it reviewing it right like you uh uh review your goals weekly monthly and it's it's I'll tell you for me uh when you have that realization you're looking over goals so whether it's a month ago or weekly or yearly and you review it and you're starting to cross them off that's the power Joey that's the power

for me that puts a smile on my face that's get that gets me cranked up and then I crumple that list up and I read and I rewrite it I said okay I got uh I got the three out of 15 I'm gonna I'm gonna re-prioritize it it just gets me uh cranked up and uh start digging into it even more uh and put another you know also another unrealistic goal out and uh you know I didn't move to California this year until uh come November and it just kind of came up as a fluke just one of those kind of things my son was working with me and his wife graduated that her teaching degree she moved back to California to help her parents out do a few things uh ahead of time took the kids with her and then he and I were working together at the time and for an old friend of mine

and uh his plan was to move back to California with the uh with the to rejoin the family he was going to stay there he moved in with me to save some money and uh and then all of a sudden he said dad I got room on my truck you're coming with me and that wasn't even in the equation we hadn't even talked about it and it just saw you thought it was September didn't I uh yeah I just bumped into you in DC in September yeah right yeah and I I had no clue that I was moving then that's fucking amazing and you're happy to be back here you like this out of here this is you up there yeah man yeah man this is me this is me and but I drilled I drilled into it I found out okay why do I want to move back okay I want to be back closer to my my elderly mother

back to my uh friends and California California is me I'm more erased here and then uh you know shipped off uh Lynn and I went to California I went to Colorado spent 30 years in Boulder and uh uh you know the rest of uh history for all that but it was the and you know I didn't really realize that I was explaining to myself again coming up with the reasons as to why I wanted to do something I was I just kind of naturally drilled down into it to that uh to that feeling uh you know what's it going to do for me uh rather than uh you know in in more than than a materialistic sense um you know you can put nicer car okay better girlfriend bigger crib better weed better food um you can do all that uh but it drilled down on each one

at least drill down two or three times keep asking yourself uh why it's the it's the why of it that you know you keep drawing down Tony Robbins puts a met entry time he's a cool individual uh but he talks about uh uh the reasons that we do things and it's either to to get pleasure or to avoid pain and I talked about it that uh you know you do something to feel good or to avoid not feeling good and it's uh it's the back again to that discipline or regret disciplines good you get to the gym before you know at the end of the week's come comes and you realize you've done four workouts a little sore feels good it feels good it can seem door sounds cranked up um and you know you you move ahead you keep moving ahead you've uh you know you've you've been a

but just a hero of minds since day one man and uh because you you took to it when you were with your song cars you were struggling to stand up and uh it was just uh you know you come and we chat and I learned as much from you as you're learning from me uh back then and even uh up until now it's uh you know where you come unbelievable you know the new new movie graduate match unbelievable and uh you know and you're saying some interesting stuff because for me this is a funny thing jim and I tell you you know uh I don't want I never wanted to be a star like movies and stuff like that for me the why for me is I let down a lot of people when I was younger and I wanted to let them know I did something that I did something and I did it out of respectful for them I didn't

want to let there was a bunch of people that came into my life that came into my life when I was doing some bad things and stuck it out with me jim and you're one of them they stuck it out with me and me doing that is to let them know that the talks they had with me the lunch they bought me whatever it is that I thought they did for me this was my way of making them proud I'm listen I don't I don't have a BMW nor do I plan on getting one I don't plan on having a convertible I don't like eating in the front so people could see me I think now for me it's uh it's a validation that to let people know that you could do what the fuck you want to do jim I was never handsome or good looking but I didn't give a fuck I got a big dick on a lot of

personality and you know you got to work with your strengths you got to work from strength everything else is background fucking music and you know what I told my agent yesterday I had a young agent and I explained to him yesterday that uh at this point in my life and how long I've been I know what works for me me going to that premiere Lee in New York did nothing for me I didn't belong there and I told my wife that I took money out of the house to go to this premiere in New York and grudge match yeah it was I brought more happiness to Mr. Barone my seventh grade teacher and my friend Georgie that I got out of it like it wasn't going to do nothing for me in a public matter because that's not the person that I am I didn't go there to walk down the red carpet

I went there because that's seventh grade teacher when nobody else liked me he backed me and we still talk and he did our documentary for me and uh so it's with me it's always been the why I always wanted the people and this goes out to you jim you know when you sat there and watched grudge match I didn't want you to think that I have a butler now or I have some guy rubbing my feet or something like that that's not by no means why I do it I still live in the same place I don't I got I have a Subaru I lease a Subaru because you know uh for me it's uh that you could do this that you could cut when I got here I had one of the biggest show runners tell me to my face one of the biggest managers tell me to my face that if you're 26 and above in

this town you're dead and I looked at him and I said you're the manager at Tim Allen and Drew Kari those motherfuckers became rich and they were 40 and you're sitting there lying to people if you have a dream nothing could fucking stop you jim you and I both know that if you want to take over Boulder Toyota and start as Chris look at Chris Miller who you train what was that kid's name Chris the Chris Hughes is is the service manager there today now the fucking kid was a nerd that was hilarious hilarious he wanted to be Tony Montana a fucking kid with glasses and he would do the accent and shit and it was and uh you know you see these people that had nothing going for them and for me I gotta tell

you Jim I had nothing going for me nothing and you know what's crazy Jim that most of the knowledge I got to move me forward I gained selling cars selling cars for me was the blueprint to my career because there's nothing like belly to belly sales there is nothing like it to learn that gift and to learn to send postcards and to call people at home and go hey fuck oh come down here the car is on fire you know just to do all those gifts that is part of who I am today I'm just a glorified car salesman that's doing comedy it's so fucking stupid it's so fucking stupid that that's all I am a glorified car salesman that does comedy and I cannot I can look you in the fucking eye and tell you this so for people to think that you have to go to acting class and have style of slosky

and uh you know all this shit they could suck my dick and you know that's true Jim I don't give a fuck what they tell you you can't do it fuck you watch me bitch yeah watch me watch my mother fucking smoke Jim handy well that's the you know that's the drill that's the drill press that's the drilling down man that's that's when you're you know now you're getting somewhere you're you're uh you know we're doing a root canal here on our on our psyche on our life uh and it's and you know it isn't going to be easy and but it's not going to be hard getting into it you just have to spend a little bit of time up front spend an hour a day uh you know two or three days getting down to the meat of of why you want to do something sure so something in there yeah I need a new suit I need

a new car okay that's all I do uh you know that'll come by the wayside but get into the to the real meat to the real you uh to work to work mean something to your life to your family to your friends to society there's gotta be a little bit of that uh uh in there and in the in the in the basis because that's that's who we are innately that's who we are Joey we're we're we're human beings we and innately we'd like to help people and we'd like to succeed and uh uh part of our success is that we just I think it's a kind of innate nature but whenever I say I don't have a lot of money and uh but whenever I see somebody that's down and out on the corner I always keep money in my center console so I don't have to dig into my pocket and stop and traffic no it's right

there boom out the window it goes that's one of my favorite charities uh other than uh uh uh guys in the mall doing tricks and and and and such earn and honest living so that's that uh the the the sense of who I am uh came from came from goal setting because I found out what was what was important to me what meant something to me me why I was living why I was trying to move forward why I was even thinking about goals and uh it it helped me discover me that that was a great ride that was a wild ride figuring out exactly who I was I mean hell I went right from home to to college a couple years uh a couple years of college living at home and on the San Diego state and then boom I'm married

and I got a kid on the way never really had a lot of time to spend by myself and lucky to have uh you know I had uh really good women in my life and uh maybe they helped me kind of figure out okay to some goal setting and uh when you're in sales you're bombarded with uh Joe Verdi and Tony Robbins and uh Brian Tracy and all these other uh fellows Joe Gerard etc and uh I don't know just something I clung to because it worked and I started discovering just these wild things about myself I had suspicions I'll tell you it's it's a it's an amazing ride to uh grill in to yourself and to find out why you really want to do things why you really want to have certain things in your life

um that's when you're getting somewhere that's when you're drilling down and it's the uh I mean it's just a proven law of nature it's a proven fact it's it's uh you know we can hear a lot lately about the 1% versus the 99% and and but they'd be kind of along the same lines it's it's a uh proven fact and it's the same 30 years ago as it is today that the 3% of people that goal set make 10 times the money for the 97% don't and it it can be spiritual capital it can be you know gold bullion and it can be personal capital um but it always translates into exponential um success and uh movement ahead and discovery uh when you write down uh you know what what you want to uh what you want to get a

co-accomplish you'll be better as head uh if you don't know what he said if you don't know where you're going you'll end up someplace else um and you know too many people are like I you know I just I didn't think this is not really what I imagined for the for my life at this point in time well then you can't change it by going well dude I want something different and working harder isn't going to get uh isn't going to get you there it's going to help and I want to stress something I really want to stress something that you know about because a lot of people make this mistake and I learned it early on and I know you learned it that one of the first goals you write is I want money we all want money everybody wants fucking money everybody wants success everyone you know

my first goal is now and it's been for the last like 11 years happiness piece of money because everybody knows even with all the fucking money in the world that you you're still gonna have drama you're still gonna have drama and you can't understand it because you think the money's supposed to take care of the drama well it doesn't happiness in my home has always been the number one goal you know when I walk in everything goes away you know everything goes away everything is washed away you know sometimes it's overpowering and you can't but that's the goal you know that when I walk in my house everything goes away when I walk in the office everything comes back and I go to work if you catch my drip when I walk in my wife and I want the kid to feel like you know

I'm very lucky I'm looking at this year old baby that's just gonna be a year tomorrow and one thing she is is she's very happy you know that's because I've changed because I know that uh women you know daughters marry their fathers you know and and I'm still gonna be a fucking animal or whatever but I just wanted to get that out there that the number one goal on that sheet every morning when I wake up is happiness because nothing can buy it you can't fucking buy it it's a state of mind man everything follows it nothing precedes it it really does you know and I and I I'm go I'm I'm judging my life off her now I'm looking at her and I you know I see that when the beginning when she was a baby I had my issues like the first two months I couldn't

believe it now I'd have I'd have to soften up a little bit but that's the main goal is always happiness and peace and you walk in your house and you're giggling and stupid shit everything else once I step out of the house I got my bayonet I'm fucking Rambo you know I'm fucking Rambo because you have to be you have to buy you know you have to be able to go and now you know that they used to fucking bury you when you were 50 now they're better look at the guy died yesterday Run Run Shaw was 106 fucking Run Run Shaw was 106 you know who Run Run Shaw was he fucking invented the Chinese fucking movie that motherfucker not only made movies but he owned the movie theaters that you went to that's how fucking strong that Chinaman was and shit and he

had sparems there and he had he produced the first all those early Bruce Lee movies it was Run Run Shaw and I gotta tell you it was straight up heroin money he was made he made that until he made Chinese connection for like three thousand dollars in Thailand nothing that's all heroin money he watched gazillions but that just goes to show you we're living longer we're living longer I don't know if you remember Mike Kessler he used to be a salesman at the Nissan store I still talk to him he moved from California to New York State to reunite with his band that's 65 years old they're all alive Jim Handy yikes unbelievable they're all alive at 65 and they're still rehearsing and they're doing gigs you know they're cover bands they do gigs all up in New York State for 300

dollars a weekend who gives a fuck they used to write you out at 65 at 65 you were worried about Social Security you weren't worried about a fucking soundcheck he's worried about a soundcheck on Friday night now unbelievable unbelievable you know you never know who you are you never know who's in there tell you dig down you know we talk about Michael Jordan and Walt Disney 300 banks turned him down for his theme park if he went bankrupt before he got somebody a bite uh Colonel Sanders he didn't he didn't start doing chicken until he was 65 and thousand banks turned his idea down they told and wrote but uh uh like four or five of his best symphonies after he went deaf now you know we talk about all these phenomenal characters well I'll tell you uh up front the

Colonel Sanders didn't know who he was and didn't tell he was 65 uh Jordan had an inkling of who was in there Walt Disney figured yeah I got some kind of idea but he kept going all of them they they kept uh they kept at it and uh you know anybody can do that and then who knows what comes out who knows who comes out you know what's crazy Jim I found out who I was when I kidnapped Kent Vella and I threw cocaine on that person till seven years ago and that's why I'm who I am today I found that that afternoon when I walked out and Kent Vella was tied up who I was and then I threw cocaine on that fucking pain until I took me tying up Kent Vella and figured I gotta tie up the world and fuck them in the ass you understand me yeah man yeah man well you know uh something you found

out was forgiveness the greatest other than charity I think the greatest virtue is forgiveness and it starts with yourself and if you're all tied up in uh knots over uh you know a previous life the new life can start today but it starts with forgiveness and uh I've had a couple people really fucked me over really do wrong to me and took me a long time I carried that grudge I carried that knot in my stomach and sooner or later when I remember Sister Mary column kill talking to me about forgiveness when I get into a fight on the playground and and uh but it really didn't get home till 30 40 years later and I started forgiving them for me not for them for me I don't want to carry that grudge around anymore I don't want to carry that that uh

that that knot about uh why I did uh you know this or that for you it was all these uh you you know past sins that uh you've been carrying around and you know now you want to make make make right for them okay well you first off forgive yourself for doing all that and then go ahead with your with your tithing uh in in whatever ways that uh come up to uh to where you feel better and it makes you happy and then the rest of it you know the number one goal happiness everything else comes right after that you got to get there first and that's the um you know you're the engine happiness is the fuel that's what uh that's what makes it all work makes it all brings it all together and you were drilling down you know for for years and uh

awesome to watch awesome to watch you are my arrow I love you buddy I love you brother I'm happy you called in today and straighten these motherfuckers out on goals and where they started it's a new year and uh you know I want everybody to fucking make it happen because it's not you know you said something that was so beautiful today it's really not that hard and after you do it you realize what was all the fucking commotion about after you start doing things and making strides you like what was all the commotion about it's society scaring the fuck out of you that thinking you can't do dick and you could do anything you want to fucking do yeah both get fucked and you can and uh you never know you might be at jordan you might be at disney you might be somebody that you had no idea

he was in there he or she were in there so you know but don't overload your ass up front and uh uh about I want to put in one plug for voting everybody vote that's another one of those things that uh and uh you've got some things you see some things uh happening you want to change some things or vote get all your friends to vote I've said about that what if you got families that you can't fucking vote well you got nothing to talk about I love you buddy thanks for calling it good luck this week I'll give you a call next week and see how everything went good I'm I'm uh uh uh ready to do it so talk to you soon brother I love you buddy thanks for calling it love you man bye did you hear that today you miserable cocksuckers get out there sharpen that

fucking helmet wash your feet it's a whole new year whatever happened last year yesterday who gives a fuck let's give some shout out to these fucking savages Zach Robinson I love you Eric Biggie Jackson Ross Dude Ryan facade Jason Walsett and Jordan Maskell Cleo fucking uh waterboxer we did the Eddie Bravo podcast my main man if you haven't donated to yuck nasty yet you're fucking slipping crazy the fucking house burned down you're fucking slipping yuck nasty is a part of who the fuck we are support yuck nasty go to hit up Jill Himitsu the chick who put it together that bad motherfucker shake them things Jill and fucking uh let's get yuck nasty some money let's get them in the house let's get his kids some fucking roller skates and a drum set and let's fucking do this

beside that we gave out some shout outs to new sponsors I want to talk about his nature box they sent me a box before the fucking holiday they had the cocoa chocolate in it the cocoa almonds in it yeah and they also had the sesame sticks in it and it had the pumpkin seeds that were salt and and these things are fucking delicious all right they're uh they're nutritionist approved okay nothing is artificial okay you get a full refund if you don't fucking like it you get five bags you could pick and choose for nineteen ninety five you get ten bags for twenty nine ninety five and you get twenty bags for forty nine ninety five I don't expect you to get the fucking twenty bags off the shot but this is what I expect you to do we're all fucking stone is here

and sometimes you catch ourselves eating onion rings or whatever fuck you don't need that in your life the cocoa almonds you can't stop eating them I'll tell you how good they are I even ate leaves I know I was gonna say I didn't get to try them I even ate fucking leaves and I ate leaves sesame sticks and the pumpkin seeds I gave him his bag because I love where are they they're in the other room no I'm finished I'm the Ganoa and the thing especially for me especially when I get high or anytime the the reason why you eat bad stuff is because it's there the great thing about this is you don't have to go to the store like the thing we all everything we do this comes to your house every month they have different ones I like the granola I don't have the granola

I have the granola at the house yeah I didn't know I I still I don't put I can't do yogurt that's something that I don't I've never liked the taste of but just as a snack if it's there I'll eat healthy that's why that's why everyone has a problem so give it a try you get 50% off your first order fuck it might as well give it a try so it's 1995 you go to joeydeas.net you're pressing Joey into the box you get 50% off your first order you can't at any time you get them sent right to your fucking house don't fuck around all right nature's way I love these fucking people is it nature nature's box nature's box I'm sorry now is there a nature's box.com I'm sure there is yeah but you can just go to joeydeas.net go to joeydeas.net go to the box I'll tell you get

the five package just to start off with all right just you get 50% off and they're big it's not like and they're fucking big yeah it's a potato chip bag where you open it up and there's a fucking air yeah no no no this is big shit here I gave it the leaf of the flight because yeah you fucking get killed on those fucking flights so fucking no no I mean it was great I would have I love almonds I would have loved to try the cocoa almonds but maybe next month no I'll have it I'll order it myself and I'm delivered here and then you tap it off you talk suck it I love almonds you took oh no they were fucking delicious they were really we started eating one two next you know my wife is taking the bag from me I'm taking the bag back from her also Dollar Shave Club is still with us

for one more month I'll tell you what again I used one of their fucking razors over the holidays and I had to go to Vegas and I was in a rush and I thought to myself even a new razor you don't cut your face with you know like when you get a new razor and you try for the first time you always cut yourself somewhere these are such good fucking razors that you don't even fucking cut yourself that's how good I'm impressed with them so long I've got two of them and I take one on the road and I leave one at the fucking house go to go to joeydeas.net go to the box it's still one dollars six dollar or nine dollars you can't beat that you know how many fucking emails I got people thanking me for Christmas selection for Christmas for referring them for Christmas it's

not a bad fucking deal no people getting there for a year they got the gift for Christmas go to joeydeas.net click on the fucking Dollar Shave Club what are you clicking there dog church church CH URCH it's Joey for fucking nature box yeah but it's church for fucking Dollar Shave Club you also got my people over at Hulu Plus which is getting they're getting a thot let me tell you something more people come up to me and thank me about Hulu Plus but I see they're getting a lot of action now I went to the agostinos the other day he uses fucking Hulu Plus I didn't know this shit people are really fucking using this shit and I want to tell you thank you thank you for believing me because it's not a bad service my wife lives off that motherfucker I got a I got my

mama Roku box for Christmas and it's just so you can hook it up to your TV and there's other services on there but one of the channels is Hulu Plus so you don't you don't have to get it the Roku is $30 they have something now called a Google Chromecast which is like 15 bucks there's no excuses any like it's not like it's not like you have to hook up your laptop to your computer with a weird wire it comes to your TV comes to your phone and it might even come to your TV with nothing if you have a smart TV so give it a shot yes you got the Roku there yeah I know she's doing some shit so there you go people Hulu Plus is taking over it's still two weeks for free $7.99 a month after that that's what a year 96 fucking dollars for entertainment for great

fucking shows you've got some sensational fucking shows on there so don't hesitate go to joeydeers.net Hulu Plus correct slash joey slash joey who the fuck's getting better than you and let me tell you something it seems like everybody's doing this now I'm sorry I didn't get to the guys from Colorado had the idea for the reefer shade for the reefer club where you get rolling papers I was just too busy I was overwhelmed I lost the number the future is going to be people you're delivering to your house is Amazon still delivering on Sundays or that was just for the holidays I don't know I hope so I think that might have been just for the holidays but but fuck it but you know what they had a bunch of people like UPS and FedEx or whatever that that didn't make it for Christmas but Amazon now

because they paid the the postal service they everyone got their presents so it was uh that's crazy no that is fucking crazy so on it my favorite fucking people in the world favorite fucking people in the world because that fucking chocolate shake is saving me that that that enforce in fact I emailed the guy said you gotta send me some fucking more I do a rewarder now with the glow coming fucking tremendous they got a thing now called stay on a program stay on program which means you sign up you get 20% off now plus the 10th from Uncle Joey if you go to annick.com and they send you everything on a rotation to your house so you get the alpha brain you get the fucking hem force you get everything just sent to your house in the fucking rotation

you want kettlebells to hit yourself in the head with whatever the fuck you want you got now you don't have to leave the fucking house it all comes directly to your house again go to joeydears.net go to the annick box order through there and you get your fucking but sign up for this annick program stay on it 20% off you can't fucking beat it and you get everything delivered to your fucking door monthly like clockwork you don't have to fucking think about it. Lee what the fuck guy I know man what the fuck Lee I'm slipping it's 2014 you haven't sang a song you haven't wiggled I can't sing what are your goals for the year Lee drop them on me what do you want to do this year I want to make the not having a full-time job thing work that's

my goal that's it nobody wants to go back to it they're not going to give you insurance no no I'll never get insurance you might as well go on here and I might as well make myself rich I'm sick of making other people rich I want to finally lose the weight that's it's I've gone up and down more times than and then probably anybody you're looking good let me get a crap but uh fuck you know weights when you were in Boston hey I ate too much at Boston did you do jumping jackson and he's not no but the thing I walked a lot I missed that it's making me think about up north really I miss walking around places and I found out you find out how out of shape you are when you're walking up and down the subway stairs you're walking down the block I walked probably

three miles New Year's Eve because we stayed at a hotel one end and we walked up and down the comments we walked to the north end that I miss that because I the when I really started getting weight is when I moved out here and I'm driving everywhere so I miss I miss that part of the east coast especially New York like I can't imagine I felt so ashamed because my feet heard New Year's Eve and I had I had a little bit of a nice shoe on but I haven't walked like that I used to walk like that every day I never like I wouldn't jump on the train for a few stops and now now I had to grin grin through it because my my feet hurt after walking a few miles I was like fuck you do lose I stopped this you know there's a picture of Doug Snanhoe Babs of me

in his house when I first moved here there's two different body types because I walked everywhere I walked everywhere when I was in Boulder I had a car but I rode a bicycle because I had a beach bump whatever the fucking beach cruiser beach cruiser okay so I rode it everywhere when you move here I don't have the heart to get on the bicycle here it's scary everybody I talked to he gets hit by a fucking the kid at Marie T got blasted by a car by a car he had there he said in broad daylight the lady saw me and still fucking hit me they're fucking retarded so I would I wouldn't fucking drive on a bicycle around here with the helmet whatever you want to wear a fucking helmet you know what concrete or shadow that fucking thing yeah and your bones and shit

listen you I ride a fucking bicycle I don't have to worry about anything it means I have to go into a track and ride around just to get my exercise and it's a shame listen man I'm like you you think I really like going to a YMCA and walking or being on a bicycle inside when we live in Los Angeles California it's gonna be 80 fucking degrees today yeah say what the fuck you want to say and you know what people say walking is the best I don't have to go to jiu-jitsu today I got a gig last night I got off the phone with my friend Manny I was gonna go to John Jock at eight o'clock today the beginner class 730 soon as I got the phone last night some guy called me for a private gig they're gonna let me know today for some fucking firefighters or some shit it's a great little

fucking gig tonight it's right north Hollywood not even the hollywood it's like in it's like in fucking Woodland Hills where's Woodland Hills it's a little bit west of here it's a little bit around here so it's just amazing how fast your fucking schedule changes also we haven't really got the publicize it because I stopped absolutely yuck nasty thing you can't eat pussy with asthma is number three it's out there motherfuckers if you don't jump on it now you're never gonna jump on it's on iTunes we also put it up on fucking payloads and it's weird a lot of people didn't go to payloads this time last time we had a we had a little bit of a break in between putting it up on payloads no it was really weird I thought a lot more people go to payloads because people people

want to pay the 799 they get the testicle yeah you gotta take it up I think it's an hour and a half long testicle test yeah people want to pay the 799 and thank you everyone for doing it we we put a lot of work into it we recorded it a couple times but uh it it was a labor of times I tell you that sucks how many times I tell you that trying to make a DVD or a tape for a guy like me sucks did I tell you that there was a time when people used to call me and say send me a tape I would have to pay somebody to come down to take me and I would bomb and then when there wasn't a camera around I was the funniest guy in the fucking world yeah you know it's it's Lee it's such a hard thing and all the stars have to align the last two weeks I've been bombing I've been bombing

you're trying new stuff yes I'm trying new stuff and I'm writing but it's amazing how you get your ups and your downs you know you you really doing anything uh before the break we were talking about the UFC with uh and you're on your way to red bands when I went to red bands but at the time I got the red bands Josh Barnett was fighting the big guy the whole time oh that's a great fight who hit him in the head with 92 fucking elbows then I watched the and I can't lie to you I was cheering for Misha Tate really yeah there's something about Misha Tate I like I know she's a barnyard cat and I love to eat her ass and spank her she's fucking got how many did you see how good dead bodies look fuck yeah when they were fucking judo and each other you did get on tell

me the truth Lee you did you feel like one of those titties if one of those titties popped out you'd fucking jump that would be great if fucking it's hard to think there's like it's hard to like get turned down when they're like fucking especially Ronda Rousey when she gets that fucking angry it's kind of scary but uh no I mean yeah no they're not that angry that's when you pull their hair and they take your dick out and suck it like it's the last fucking stomach in the world oh my god oh yeah they fucking suck it like then you see their face turn red their eyeballs get big like they like they drank poison I'll fucking break it back well I mean they say everyone loves an underdog but there's something about Rousey who's just so dominant oh she fucking

threw her around but Misha Tate went for it Misha Tate when she was going for it I was getting so turned down she's so fucking hot yeah when you see her in street clothes you're like god damn you got the perfect body but I respect them both as fighters and I'm happy that they finally got that shit out of the way then she wouldn't shake her hand when you see you're right a favors fighting for another yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you're right a favor another guy that fell down for a while he got it together now he's back like fucking uh and now Tito Ortiz is doing having DUIs and slamming his portion on the side of the highway I didn't see that a day or two ago they uh they arrested them because he slammed into a median on the 405 and he was drunk

fucking my heart goes out to that fucking family with him and the girl it's just so weird how your life can change if you don't stay on top of the times you know and my heart goes out to those guys but uh it was a good UFC fight we're gonna have George and we're gonna make junkie next week oh cool I love George I was gonna have him just to review what happened and the whole fucking year what else you got going on cock smoke uh please listen to Flying Jew Radio if you're watching it live right now we're actually gonna do it right after this because Augustino has to go to work um and be on the lookout I'm gonna I'm working with people on t-shirts uh but just listen to the podcast we're really trying it's it's different than this

where you have we have people call in so uh I really appreciate all the support what else can we say motherfucker yeah I missed you guys I really uh had to tell you it was rough last week because I would love to do a podcast like on Thursday or Friday I know a lot of people are sitting around you know but I really missed you fucking guys so I know today is like a rusty podcast but we're just getting our fucking things back to us we'll be back motherfuckers tomorrow at 6 a.m. ready rock we just want to do this you know today's like a Christmas in Cuba and that's why I really want to do this and it's my daughter's birthday tomorrow so I really want to do this today just to get is it like part of the 12 days of Christmas or is it today's part of 12 days okay today's like uh

it's the three wise men it's called the play of mud so that's why I wanted to give gifts or what do you do you smoke pot with people okay give them a hug you give granola you know what I'm saying you're fucking uh you uh do this thing I know Lee's gonna try to get uh a podcast thing going we're talking to josh wolf we're talking to a couple other people we're gonna turn this into reality but I'll start it with you guys fucking thank you thank you for helping us out I will see you motherfuckers in Buffalo this week next week I'm at the Melrose improv Friday and Saturday we'll all start lineup and the week after that I'm in the house of fucking comedy in Minneapolis at the mall of fucking America Lee was gonna come but we're trying to get the t-shirts we couldn't

make the deadline so Leo come on one of the later dates we almost had a date in Houston my thing got turned back my my Dallas date and now all I got left is fucking Boston so I don't know if Lee wants to go back to Boston in the middle of the fucking winter it's going to be colder than that but you see did you see that comedy club no it's uh I've heard good things about it but yeah everybody loves it but Brian Cowell's there this week now the one that I had spoken to you and I was stalling this fucking you made me giggle because you're like I ain't gonna tell you I'm coming from I'm like maybe you went to an orgy with this fucking shit and you're like I went to science and fiction theater tell me where you went when you answer questions and shit the murder

missed oh you were I love that show you were fucking killing me it's called sheer madness and it's fucking the the uh you went years ago you went years ago I went I went probably eight years ago and I went to one of those where you asked the people somebody trump the guy yeah it's did you ever trump the guy what did I ever want trump the guy what's that mean hit him with a fucked up question no no no I mean I love the I love the kids ask the questions it was better when I saw it a few years ago because like one of the original cast members was there and I we always make jokes but for to me I love I think gay guys are hilarious I love I love I love the way they talk and I love I think they're hilarious too and and the one of the main actors

and it is a gay guy a hairdresser but when I saw he was old this time he was like 20 something so it took it out of it for me like it was just a different actor but I I still loved it it fucking kills me it's in a tiny it would be great for us to do a podcast there but it's like it's been there for 30 years so they don't they can't really move the set but it's it's on it's in the basement of where they do blue man group sits about 80 people everyone laughs they make jokes about Boston that know what my girlfriend didn't get but they make jokes about dunking donuts they make it's gonna fuck yeah how many times only two or three times I was you know just one of the donuts tell me it's the donuts aren't where it used to be I told you that I fucking told you that yeah I fucking

told you that that the apple spices garbage some of the donuts I went to yum yum's I brought donuts to the Augustinian they they they were not what they used to be either and it yum yum really went corporate yum yum fucking went I'm not yum yum dunking donuts went corporate and what kills me is that people buy these dunking donuts and these dairy queens like the Queen and Northridge go to that one you'll never go to Dairy Queen again I'm sure you know why because it's fucking foreign is that buy it they never grew up on no I'm not making fucking laughs at nobody they don't know what dunking donuts means to us yeah so to them it's just corporate donuts now and and what corporate bagels you know what they have they have like actual

sandwiches now they have like turkey sandwiches chicken parmesan sandwiches they don't tell me you ate a sandwich because I swear no I can't I had the egg sandwiches because they've always had those at least when I was growing up but they had like bananas and a coffee cake at the counter I love to me dunking donuts is a cup of hot chocolate that burns your tongue burns your fucking burn your tongue and you get a regular glaze and a chocolate glaze donut that was my childhood that's why I'm overweight but also it's fucking it used to be great but now they must cook the donuts in one little place fucking person that ate dunking donuts we all grew up a fucking dunking donuts and the tea and it's fucking embarrassing I love those donuts too

I didn't kill my I'm not a donut guy but one donut ain't gonna fucking kill you you know once every two weeks I mean we ate them at the wrong time with breakfast you know that that's terrible you put a bunch of sugar into your body and spike it but we all grew up on a dunking fucking donut the coffee's still not bad I don't drink coffee that's the thing but the chocolate's still not bad no the chocolate's delicious the chocolate's still good the coffee is off the chain but my wife doesn't understand that coffee she doesn't understand what it means to me so it's tough to sell at the fucking house it's coming it's coming to California like next year and people already freaking out but it's uh the donut the bagels were still pretty good the bagels they must have not fucked with

but they're not not you bagels no no they're fucking sore they smell like hummus they put them next to the fucking humming now you understand see god punished you god punished you on that train back the chick eating the bad food oh my everybody told you that shit you didn't believe me what was she eating hummus no it wasn't something in that family she had applesauce in a cup but then she fucking had like taco meat that was just in a bowl and she didn't start eating it until because you know the bus route it's on the it's on the highway in Connecticut it's fine but as soon as it goes I think it goes through like it goes to Queens or or some bad part of New York where the projects are and it starts bouncing because they're taking turns she takes it out then and

she's elbowing me and it's spilling everywhere and I took a picture of it because like what the so you sat next to this dirty I we we got to the we got to the bus and we got we had a 1230 thing we had an 11th and we got there at 1130 so they were like well let's just get there an hour earlier so we couldn't sit next to each other unfortunately but uh yeah that was that's why I like the train and luckily we took the train back because we we got in a cab in the middle of snowstorm in Boston someone tried took someone took the bus back took them nine and a half hours to take the bus back and the trade was four hours because of the snow so it's uh reinforced why I'm living here oh now yeah now you're done now the cold weather spectacular I've gone back three years in a row

and I think I'm gonna have to go back in the spring and uh but I I have been thinking about northern California more I think and I think that's I think that's kind of a good medium I don't I like the weather here it's not that but I am getting sick of just being stuck in a car all the time in a car all the time yeah I don't like what are you gonna do in northern California gonna hike around gonna hike around gonna stab mama right now I can't I can't I can't eat the pussy because I got a little bit of a chest cold but I can't eat the pussy that's the best time you cough right in the mouth you can't cough right into it you just cough some of that fucking flu bug right I had sex on my mom's house for the first time I never did that in high school

we waited until she took we waited until she took the sleeping pill and at first we were quiet but then by the second or third night we were just going at it and then did you plant the sleeping pill in mama no she takes her own sleeping pill yeah she can't she uh like everyone in my family can't sleep so you don't put an extra one in that you should took I joked about that but I never I never we never had to dose or she goes to sleep early did you give her a ring no she told you oh yeah I've always told it that you rub the feet yeah you're a good fucking dude you know it's fucking expensive fucking gong what's expensive dinners fucking the plays and luckily she's not she doesn't want that much but like we went to the one place I did mess was legal

seafoods went there you didn't go no I went twice I went I went what'd you get you get the clam chow no I didn't get the clam chow I got crab cakes got some shrimp got a Caesar salad I love there but uh we went on the airport on the way back we went we went there before we had to fly uh and I did miss some good seafood I wanted the chowder but I just wasn't in the mood for that you know it's a it's really we the uh my wife's an accountant so I looked at when I fly you know the process from A to C you know a club says for instance we're gonna give you this amount of dollars two thousand dollars and you look at that amount and if and at first you said that's great for four shows it's five hundred dollars and they're gonna pay for a plane ticket

you know I always spend two something over that because the cabs yeah you know you don't figure out budgets for cabs and budgets for shit at the airport you know it's it's it's getting so out of control did they raise baggage fees because when I flew an extra bag was 25 bucks today this time I flew on an extra bag because of the gifts and stuff it was 40 bucks how much is your parking we didn't we I parked at the girls house and we took a cab that's a good idea yeah that was the cab was 40 that's not bad she looks close that's not bad I get off I would it would have killed me I would have killed me to go to uh 40 fucking dollars a day a day it's amazing what you spend so I appreciate when you guys come to the shows and when you buy a cd that's why I keep

everything 799 guys you know we're ordering shirts now I want to keep them at 20 the people are gonna ship them they're gonna ship them they gotta charge five bucks you know you you think that there's all this money involved and you look around and you're like Jesus Christ I just did you know this every time I fly there's always none expected you know in a year people who don't know how to fly did you notice did you learn a couple of things this time when you flew did you learn that if you don't have a fucking first-class plane ticket you sit there for two hours what do you mean in security did you learn that we know what no it was cool in Boston they didn't make me take my shoes off no no they were too busy they didn't have time for that shit they were moving to that was cool but oh you probably

were tsa you don't fly a lot so but did you notice that uh now if you just buy a regular ticket you're dead all the airlines offer you amenities the extras the extras you know the security line and I told my wife the other day I go in a year it's not the cost of the flight it's what's surrounded around the flight that you pay for you know you want the extra six inches the luggage you know southwest doesn't charge you for fucking luggage that's why they don't give you I don't give a fuck I'm a plus now you know I'm saying southwest once listen anybody could get a degree anybody could do anything you ain't shit if you get an a-plus fucking membership fucking southwest and we'll end it on that I love you motherfuckers I'll see you tomorrow six a.m ready to rock I want to thank

on it I want to thank Hulu plus I want to thank Nature's Box I want to thank Dollar Shave Club I want to thank all you motherfuckers that listen stay black have a great day and we'll see you cocksuckers tomorrow a little cyber-bloody say okay and stay tuned Jew flying Jew radio is coming soon coming in a few minutes I'll go nowhere he's coming right now now that the show's over don't forget to sign up for your free trial of Hulu plus Hulu plus let's you binge on thousand the fifth shows anytime anywhere on your tv pc smartphone or tablet support this podcast and get an extended free trial of Hulu plus when you go to huluplus.com slash joey or go to joeyds.net and click on the hulu plus banner and don't forget to sign up for Dollar Shave Club dot com

you get high quality razors sent to your door every month for a fraction of what you pay retail go to Dollar Shave Club dot com slash church that's Dollar Shave Club dot com slash church or go to joeyds.net and click on the Dollar Shave Club banner now that the show's over also don't remember uh don't don't forget to go to naturebox.com that's naturebox.com and order great tasting healthy snacks at 50 off snack smarter in the new year with healthy and delicious treats like french toast granola which is delicious support this podcast and get 50 off for your first order go to naturebox.com and use promo code Joey that's promo code Joey The execution of the fine

You're fine, you really have to turn The race is warm before it's red The end begins, we'll go The truth is out, the lies are old But you're the one to know Nobody will ever let you go When you ask the reasons why They tell you that you're on your own

Fill your head up full of lies The people who have people to They want to see them run They get some life up close on you And there's just no reason You're a singer that has to do To take your mind away And you don't care if you don't see

They're gonna lie down, yay Nobody will ever let you go When you ask the reasons why They just tell you that you're on your own Fill your head up full of lies Don't mess with me Everybody, everybody, everybody Everybody, everybody, everybody

When you ask the reasons why They're gonna lie down, yay When they feel hot, when they feel sick My time for fusion, nothing more to tell, yeah Everything around you, what's it going to do? God knows how your dad knows, what blessed all of you Stop it bloody, stop it, nothing more to do, living just for dying, dying just for you, yeah This computer is pretty good, it's okay dude, it's good

Thanks for watching!