Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - 01/09/2013 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #44

Episode Date: January 10, 2013

The first podcast after Joey's daughter was born. Dr. Frank Bredice called in to talk about Testosterone replacement. Clay Guida calls in ahead of his January 26th fight. This podcast is brought to you by Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount. Streamed live on 01/09/2013

Oh We ready oh shit, oh shit Tuesday, no Wednesday January. What is it the fucking night? Yeah, oh shit January 9th 2013 the church of what's happening now coming at you cock suckers. They do it Lee Oh shit, oh shit, it's that day motherfucker the church of what's happening now Joey Diaz my brother Lee sciat aka the flying Jew. What's up? Nothing. What do you mean? What's up with what's up cock suckers? That's right. It's over. The ordeal is over She's been born three fucking days 19 nights

It would have been easy if I would have been I fucking know his art You know I'm saying 40 fucking days and night. Let me tell you something Tuesday yesterday at 7 0 8 when my daughter was born I could tell you a bunch of fucking lies I was happy but in the same way I was fucking overjoyed because that's it. I get back to fucking work My wife has been home since December like 10th drive me fucking nuts. You understand me It's tough to do anything when you got somebody behind you go to blackjack table and you're winning and You got you're rocking and rolling all sudden something's going on You're the metaphysics are all and you turn around. There's like a Chinese guy or something standing behind you drives

You fucking next thing, you know, you lose everything even your spare ribs. You lose everything what I'm telling you I don't like people fucking sitting behind me. I never fucking do I fucking hate it Like if I'm in a restaurant when my wife sits behind me in that fucking bedroom, it drives me crazy I got to get the fuck out of there. So yeah, I couldn't write I couldn't do much. We're back bitches. You know I'm saying Like like Gloria gain his boyfriend from out of space ex-boyfriend Lisa I add see it's a beautiful fucking day to be alive. We got some great goddamn guests as usual This podcast is brought to you by on it go to on it calm and check out the makers of Fuck strong bung which I took three of them today

That's what I drank this morning. I'm few milkshake to get me over here. I've already lost five pounds since the other day No way really yeah, man. I stuck to my weight watcher points. I'm done. I gotta go down This is I don't like this. I don't like when you work out a bunch in here And you put on a bunch of weight unexpectedly there is my wife's pregnancy because we're eating fucking young young But it's all over now, and I'm happy and It's crazy. I'm really happy about life that I got a second chance of being a dad. Yeah And you know, I'm not one of these fucking guys. Oh when she was born. Oh my god It was good. No, go fuck yourself. Stop being a fucking faggot all your life, right?

They're like fucking faggot. Oh my god. Well, I held her a change. I gotta go fuck yourself What I was by the door. Okay when she was born. I wasn't in the mix. I was by the door She dropped some blood. I don't have a little monkey, and I saw it. I was like, I gotta get some fucking head. I Mean it looked like somebody shot him in the fuck pussy like Joe Lozano's head. I mean there was blood Fucking everywhere. I mean there was blood everywhere and my wife was a fucking trooper You know we got there Sunday at one in the afternoon She had that kid Tuesday fucking morning for a day. She was on her back Just you know with her legs up with tubes in the fucking arms and then

You know I did like six hour tours and that would leave for a little while and I had some good friends that came Duncan came down Yes, they were the fucking camera. It was hilarious Duncan Trussell is I don't get cancer. Listen, you got to put 19 bullets and fucking dunking to stop I'm in a shot to the head this motherfucker. I'm in there. My wife's got that big fat tit out She's feeding the kid and Duncan comes in with a fucking camera and we were gonna do the podcast But they started moving her So we didn't do the podcast in the hospital The reason why I want to do a podcast in the hospital because a lot of people knows Ricky Ricardo, Jr.

Was born on TV like in a way a lot of people know the Lucio ball show Yeah, Lucio ball show got so big if you've seen I think it had a record that only like Seinfeld broke Like that most viewers it was the night that Ricky, Jr. Was born it was like 1955 or something like that Well, I didn't even know that story. Let's go. That's why you come to the fucking church Oh, what's happening now because I drop it on you my little brother Lisa at we got a fucking new name for this place a little little Jerusalem This is what Jesus came to get stabbed and shit. Don't go to fucking Jerusalem. They don't fuck around there. You dumb mother fuckers Everybody was well content. Oh, fuck you go to fucking Jerusalem

They'll stab you right in the fucking neck and put a yarmulke stick on your fucking forehead That's what we got to get yarmulke stick is just to put them on people's fucking forehead to let them know again Well, you got me drinking this Pepsi. I can't drink it. I have bottled water for you Toxic bottled water. Well, I look like Mike Dolce fucking bottled water in the morning. I got cramps or two fucking hours I love eating healthy, but water in the morning fucking kills me. I gotta have like something first down a little bit of water What's up Lisa yeah, you're looking at me like you want to borrow ten bucks. What's the problem? I always want to borrow ten bucks What's going on? No, I would I just uh, it was funny because I mean I've known you for like a year and a half now

So I kind of two years two yet two years. So I can 15 years Who gives a fuck whatever it is So I can I kind of can tell like when you're in certain moods and that when I came over to help you fix your internet Like I could tell you like you were mad because the internet wasn't working but it was just you like you really care about your wife and When you're stressed it comes out like a little not anger towards anyone, but it's just like you got stressed out So like when you when I saw that it happened like half an hour after you call me. I'm like, oh, he must be he must be thrilled guys I

You know, I've been unable to do much because my wife is around You know, I can't believe she stays in the fucking room for the podcast sometimes doesn't come in You know must kill it. But you know, she's has to torture me at some point that they like what are you doing? What are we gonna do? So it's very hard to sell into something when you write comedy when you like I like to read but I like to read to know That I'm not gonna be interrupted for an hour and I'm gonna have total fucking peace, you know, like when I'm on a plane That's perfect to read. That's why I always buy books before I fly especially I love when I got to fly long distances like six or seven hours with a new book. Oh

Jesus fucking Christ, that is tremendous You get yourself like a bigger seat for 20 bucks like business class and it's worth it If you have three fucking books, you've been dying to read and you got two six-hour flights That's it. I'll put them down and I put them down the hotel You're probably the only one reading cuz like I can't even imagine all I do on planes is listen to music or watch movies and stuff Listen, but you got five hours. Okay. Nobody could read for five hours. Not even Einstein You have a headache your eyeballs fucking burn. So what you do is you bring an iPod? Mm-hmm You're listening to music for two fucking hours. You get up. You piss you stretch you come back

You read two or three chapters You take a walk you come back you watch a fucking television show some stupid show They got on there then you go back to the book. I got movies on me You know, we all got more I think like I'm a big shot. I got movies on my pot. I got Rocky a man on fire Oh, I will rewatch those motherfuckers to the screen blows up You know, I got an old-school iPod. Yeah, like I refuse to get the new one because this one's you know I go to the gym with the fucking thing. It falls and gets dirty people touch I'm not gonna go buy a nice but my wife has the new one and she was always saying take that one because

You can't even put music on that old. Okay. I don't even think you put music on we've I've had the same 2000 songs on there for fucking eight years. We don't listen anything new anyways No, I listen to I believe believe it or not listen to everything. It's just like the other day I was listening to something that Ari listens to a lot I already had a problem for a while. I listened to social distortion. I've never heard of that. Oh fucking horrid Horrid It was fucking horrid, you know, and you listen to some of this music and you tell where they who they're trying to be and I Agree with that shit. I don't mind, you know, when you see me then I watched Dyson special

And how was it? It was good. I watched the first 20 30 minutes of that. I wasn't busy I had some time and he has kids on there, you know, I I love Andrew I love Andrew, you know What really pushed me over the top when I came out of prison was my buddy money managed to me No, I had a tape and he goes you got to see this motherfucker And he gave me this tape and I was in the halfway house for New Year's Yeah, and New Year's had a TV downstairs and I went I had a TV in my room, but I had no VCR I want everybody else to watch it. They're like if you have movies come down and put them in and I'll never forget putting

Diceclan and as he was saying his material I'm sitting there going I think that like when he says, you know, some guy comes up to me with a flower Hi, would you like to buy a flower? Yes, like a plant in your ass. That's how I walk around when I'm walking around the daytime I see these idiots like I went when we were in Hollywood and Hollywood yesterday, you know She had the baby and we went to this place for breakfast me and Duncan always go to Mimi's but since I'm on the diet I was gonna get the steak of eggs. Fuck you forget me. He's we went over to this new age place I had yogurt with steel oats and three Irish people in there What the fuck it is because that's what they say to you the Irish steel. Oh, it told me and it's funny

we were by the Scientology building mm-hmm, and and We he goes, you know people play games a lot of hipsters come to the Scientology building and they stand in front to see how long It takes them to come out and talk to them. Oh, you can't even walk on that block You know that I've never even tried. No, I could care less about mingling with those fucking Nuckleheads, but it's funny. They were telling me a story. I said the restaurant that they're the people who suck to revolt up Oh, really because I guess on that cruise ship. That's what happened Remember his son died because he got poor medical attention on a cruise ship and the Scientology people

Oh, that's why his wife was trying to pull out. She didn't want Suri on that fucking cruise Yeah, so I heard that he was trying to get out of Scientology and that's nor the blowjob and handjob allegations came up But they got they got shit on time to roll for they got him getting come on his fucking head They got him fucking swallowing a dick before fucking the he sucked. What's his name's dick? You know the jungle oh chained and chained. Yeah, he sucked his dick unchained and chained. I haven't seen the Django yet Oh, it's really good, but I've been getting the sag nominees, you know, they send you all the movies Fuck yeah, I got a I got a I got our go which I saw already in the movie But I got that fucking movie at wife's last week, which is it's killing me

And I'll talk about it with you guys That's what a humble beginnings with the narrow and Bradley Cooper where the father plays an eagle fan Goddamn people Goddamn if you haven't seen that fucking movie go fuck Abe Lincoln and his fucking hat his English fucking accent That guy could suck my dick go see fucking silver linings silver linings playbook. Yeah. Yeah, go see silver I haven't seen that yet fucking let me tell you some deniro acts again deniro hasn't acted since like Good fellas or something like that. You act it again The guys in it. I forget what his name is his buddy that owns I'll go the restaurant in Santa Monica

The guy that in good fellas when you walk into the hotel and get the blow he goes you want to see helicopters That's like his childhood, but that guy does movies good guy to the commercial them The chick from Hunger Games isn't it and she's fucking great Bradley Cooper I'd never like fucking Bradley Cooper until there's more is it to play look depressing No, it's a movie. It's a movie about what everybody's going through right fucking now We're all half retarded half of us got fucking problems, but it's a sally Struthers isn't there, okay? Sally Struthers fucking you know, that's what my mice gave me that thing to give Tony Hincliffe Yeah, that's what I was thinking about because I was trying to think about when the last time Sally Struthers worked

That bitch hasn't worked so she did those commercials for those African kids. They were laying there with flies on She can't work because there's no flies left in Africa the kids ate them The kids finally said what the fuck I'm laying here skinny and shit. I got all these animals. This is protein They start eating those fucking wings. Oh Laced with dog shit and God you ever see a piece of shit. You see all these flies on you in New York They got green flies. Oh shit Lee. It's that time fat man alert fat man alert I'm down a couple fucking pounds like five pounds, but I got this anti Dolores 100 milligram bite. I'm about to split with my man

Lee Lee Leland because that's how we do it here in the church a motherfucking what's happened now What do you got for me Lee any other music nothing? No, but I actually it's funny You brought up a movie that deniro was in because I saw Django. I Like all the Quinn's movies, but the one movie I haven't seen was Jackie Brown So Jackie I was wondering if you thought it was good. I like Jackie Brown Jackie Brown's one of those movies I never think about but when it's on I always watch it. You know, he's great in that Fonda. It's really good Deniro's good Chris Tucker gets killed. I mean, there's a bunch of fuck Chris Tucker's in in a playbook that movie simple

Okay, he's he's great. He's fucking great built Chris Tucker. It's great to see him in something other than a movie with some fucking Chinese guy playing Comedian he's greatness. Go see this movie just because it hits that home You know, it's funny because I don't like talking about this shit, but I'll tell you motherfuckers I booked a movie called grudge match and And it's got deniro Stallone. Oh, this one. I can Kim Bassenger and Kevin Hartman. Oh, that's not the most important thing about it I mean, I'm happy to Stallone and deniro and that's all fine and dandy But Alan Arkins and he's huge and listen freebie and the bean when he and little miss sunshine when he gets thrown out Doing the heroin, you know, I love him. I love that's my comedy idol

I beat freebie and the bean we're gonna review with him and James Conn. Nobody remembers this fucking movie Yeah, I've never heard nobody yeah, yeah, nobody remembers from the youth. It's a it's a guy movies the original like midnight run You know, but uh, no, I like that simple simple play whatever the fuck it is simple linings playbook. Yeah, but um, I Know I already know what you're gonna say But as an actor because there's there's been a huge thing of someone people at work We're talking about how they didn't like Django because it was so that he said nigger 8,000 times And it was they call the black split black splitation, which is not I don't think but Aside from you being a

Comic and the guy who doesn't really get offended that much if you like as an actor like how like when you hear people talk about that Like what do you think if you were gonna go be in a movie and you had to say nigger 8,000 times Does that offend you or I say for free all fucking day niggas big chink who gives a fuck You know people getting too fucking insensitive. They're trying to make stuff up to fuck up their life And I don't even listen to those people no more. They just you see it every day You see it online you see it on Facebook. You see it on it's like they try to make You know, they try to make a to try to be cool To try to sound cool that you know nigger or whatever it's 2013 if nigga offends you

It's time you fucking got a dick and just stuck one in your ass and one in your eye and one in your mouth And took the plunge take the plunge just go over to the other fucking side and switch governments Nothing should fucking offend you like that that you have to go to Twitter. You know what offends me You know what offends the fuck out of me. Let's get out of the fucking way by the way When I see something nasty on television between seven eight This is way before the kid was born away before because I know that at 7 30 at night kids are still watching television Yeah, I love sons of anarchy But if I'm fucking 10 and I'm going through the fucking thing and I hear dick and this and whatever and kids are gonna hear it

On the street that offended me when I see a tampon commercial and I got women sitting in the fucking room. Look at me next time I'll go on stage and talk about stabbing a bitch and fucking on the ass and eating her pussy and sticking my nose in her asshole But when I see a tampon commercial watch me next time my heart stops my fucking heart stops You don't have to advertise for fucking tampon everybody bleeds. It's a no fucking whatever Just have an avalanche picture in a fucking outline with a chick with a stick with a string come out of a pussy bleeding to fucking death and no decide a tampon commercial now You know, it's like rubber commercials really I gotta sit there with my friend's kid one day and the chick comes into the screen with a Head sticking up. I just got blown the fuck away. I gotta explain to this eight-year-old

Why these people buying condoms and what the fucking condom is? I don't mind you advertising for condoms, but go late fucking night Mm-hmm, but you don't see me going online writing about condoms condom. No, okay, whatever bothers you You move the fuck on you focus on what's what fucking important that bothers you that they said nigga anytime and it's people that are white That's what pisses me off the most. It's white people. They're in a nigga in the world that raises fucking hands and said I'm offended They don't give a fuck. They don't give a fuck. It's over. It's white people White people who go to dances and take pictures all fucking day of their friends drinking coffee those fucking faggots That's who it is. It's the other side of this country. That's ruining this country that you know, it's like going to a comedy club

You know how many times I've gone to a comedy club the comedy store and a manager's giving me a letter Really so you left this comedy club drove all the way home got on your computer and wrote a letter about how you were offended You're just looking for something if you were to just go home and eat your wife's pussy Whatever the next door to you seriously if you just go next don't say I was offended the fat Cuban said nigger more than the Django I'm gonna go home and stick my tongue up my wife's ass and pull a big piece of shit out of respect That's when you fucking you know I'm saying but everybody worries about everything else. They worry about this You know Daniel Taj said rape on stage. Did he rape you? No, then go on with your life Did you see the chick that wrote the letter? Nobody would rape her nobody would ever think of raping this fat fuck

You understand me. So what's with this shit nobody ever thought of sticking that dick in this fucking obese whatever the fuck She is it's people like that to get offended for no fucking reason. Yeah, people get offended at this podcast. They could suck my dick I'm the one that's getting up with you at five in the fucking morning Yeah, you know doing this out of the kindness of my fucking heart because I love you cock suckers Lee What music you got for me? I gotta let's up. No anything in the middle nothing You didn't give me a song in the middle. They all miss the show these motherfuckers. You got to have preps on your own He'll leave a wiggle something from how about back to the motel just we get going here for a couple minutes here Just you're killing me Lee saw okay. In fact get get over here

You're eating this fucking bike right now. I don't want to hear crying or tears. I was fucked up I fell asleep on the couch. I don't give a fuck It's great to have you guys here the church of what's happening on my little brother Lisa. Yeah It's just talking about different movies and the church of now, you know, they were doing they give you a cookie in Jew church No, then you church The power of Christ compels you give a special chance to my girl Auntie Dolores in the house. I love it. I've got some stones already. Yeah, I'm excited about the baby I'm excited for my wife guys. I got some good get over here. I'm trying to get the song started

Like this like another lady on a porch tremendous You're asleep like a baby Lee who the fuck loves you like me cock sucker No, don't be looking at it. No, because then you take it over then you break it up Let me see you the power of Christ compels you let's go chew it. That's a boy Don't be put your fingers in there like that's a boy you're gonna sleep like a boy drinking Pepsi if you chew it Do you break down the T8C? That's a boy. Oh, yeah Get it together

It's national Jews eating fucking brownies day. What's the problem faces? Oh my god That's it. I got a straight man. I'm dropping you off on a black neighborhood 20s no way See if the Django Unchained helps. Oh, yeah, here we go now Sure, you need to taste the ass too. It's an acquired taste. You know I'm saying wait till you get that in your face. Oh get back to the hotel It's a beautiful Wednesday motherfuckers get up there sniff your balls and see what a fuck God put you on this plant They're waiting for you to go out there and take their fucking paper

They're waiting for you to go out there and tell them who the fuck is the captain Kirk of the enterprise That's what they're waiting on today cocksuckers. Don't be scared. It's a new year. You got to get out there and do your thing I wrote a bunch of fucking goals down just like Jim Handee said I got goals down for the week That's why I started with this weight thing It's a new year. It's 2013 the minds didn't show. I know you're half years of disappointed. You wanted to shoot yourselves You know you doomsday preppers, but it's over. It's time to answer It's time to fucking claim responsibility for what the fuck you do What's the matter with you? You're over there huffing and puffing like I don't I don't know how you eat that weed

I don't like it. I don't like the taste and I gotta go to the doctor and get a shot today That means I'm probably gonna faint, but you know I ate the weed I did I respect for you stop complaining respect for me That's right. You're a good dude. You've about 45 minutes until I'm passed out. So what 45 you're fine You'll be we want to do jumping jacks after this one get some oatmeal. It's over. Yeah, we're putting out a fucking program Maybe you're some people some beautiful shots out like I said on it calm I'm fucking on it and I love it that strong bone has definitely sunk into my legs. I have no pain I haven't been jumping rope with the kickboxing place, but I've been getting on the tires. I've been doing everything else I just want to give some

great fucking shout outs because I've been watching you motherfuckers lately Joe Avalos Sammy Wilson Sebastian sad Hempera he he's a bad motherfucking my man is he rocked Frank El Franco Cliff Kenny ollie bars as usual down there and motherfucking Australia holding it down Neil Samuels The Jew of the year. I love that motherfuckers always Leroy neck bone. It's the first week of January He's already the Jew of the year. Yeah, Martin T. Yeah, he won it last year in this year Great Blackwood, and I want to tell your sister Renee. Happy birthday. Mr. Blackwood tell her I love

I don't know how old she's gonna be but tell her put those titties away Aaron at the gym, I fucking love you and that's it guys. We got my man Who else is coming in today? Yeah, you know what's crazy about yesterday the best thing about I don't know a lot of people don't know This I love fucking Elvis Really? Oh Come on now. How the fuck it see that you guys and this you didn't get Elvis beat into you like we got out was What's happening brother hey Joey, how are you? Hey, who am I speaking to? Radici what's happened dr. Radici great for you to call. How are you today my friend?

Actually, I just got back from the gym, which was not that exciting getting there with a quarter to five But I did it for you. That's why I love you. How was the gym today? Another exciting day at the gym and a quarter to five How long is your workout go doctor? I? You think it about 40 or 45 minutes, and that's pretty much the end and how many days a week And I usually go like three days on take a day off Three days on take two days off Three days on take another day, and then like every third cycle I take three days off because you know

I'm 64 and you kind of need more times recuperate, and I don't do a long workout because you know Too much on the old joints Are you taking strong bone from on it? Pardon me. Are you taking strong bone from on it? See I got to bring you some of that stuff That's what I've been taking and I'm a fat fuck and nothing really hurts after I take that But anyway, the reason why I had John doctors my doctor I love this guy at that one the coolest fucking doctors I've met since I had Orlando Devaya, and he stopped telling me fucking blow in the 80s doc

I love you to death. You're a great doctor, but tell these guys what you do Well, I'm a chiropractor physician I used to be the head doctor for the US Olympic medical team and right now I besides doing my musculoskeletal practice, which I love I've for the last 18 years I've taught and an hormone replacement That is just meaning you know replacing hormones to a normal level not super physiologic levels, which we know I'm sure I listen to you all the time, so I know the guys that call in they know about super physiologic levels We're talking about replacement levels just like normalize

So that's kind of where I The focus of my hormone practice is to get people to have normal balanced hormones And what's the age of the people that usually come in to see you doc? Like I'm gonna be 50 and doc before we get any farther. My baby girl was born yesterday. Oh Congratulations, that's great and you named her Mercy Sophia Well, my daughter's name is Sophia. There you go. See I kept the Italian in there too out of respect For the people who took care of me I had to give them something back

So hey by the way not to pitch a movie which I wouldn't because I wasn't in there anything but did you see? Silver linings by any chance we were just talking about it I could I just came back from the gym. I have to tell you I you know, I begrudgingly went to the movie I really enjoyed that movie because it kind of you know looks I grew up on the East Coast Italian family I have to say there's a lot of parallels who ever wrote that definitely, you know It was pretty right on with the family part It was when they were young and screaming sit here the Malook Touch the remote right y'all at the end. Oh my god

I'm making a brajo. I was fucking dying. I know I showed I got up in the movie I'm like honey look that's fucking brajo because my wife is as white as can be she's never seen a fucking brajo She just heard us talking about it. No, it was amazing and how good was the mirror? How good was the mirror? How good was that young girl even Bradley Cooper was tremendous Chris? You know, I I guess I because I don't know him that well I don't I go to he was he was great. She was great with the narrows there Oh, I mean when he gets, you know, he can trust me. I know he can get into that part without much of a stretch Yeah, he was you know, it reminded me a little that's the first time I've seen him funny since midnight run

Absolutely, you're right. I totally agree. I actually said that to my daughter I said he hasn't been that funny and that like timing since midnight run look human you're the expert comedian, you know But I mean he's I think he kind of walks through roles a lot at the you know, just kind of I don't take some But I think he enjoyed doing that movie No, he did you could tell he was happy and his buddy was in it the guy that was in it with him is the guy who owns I'll go right right. Yeah, I forget what his name is. I did a commercial I can't remember either and we kept in touch main owner I'll go. Yes. So he's a he's a great guy

So how old are usually the people that come to see you? Well, you know, it's changing because when I first started doing hormone replacement my patients were middle 50s and up Okay in male and you know 45 and up and female because that's when women tend to start getting pre-menopausal Okay, but I have to say in the last, you know, decade It's dropped down to I see men in their late 30s and early 40s all the time now coming in with low testosterone And it's a common thing doc. It's very very common, you know, it's it's controversial as to the reasons

Obviously, there is no one reason I mean my feelings and I have access to about a hundred and forty five thousand blood tests for males through the International Hormone Society and you know When you when you see it broken down, you can see that it's it's getting lower and lower in the age group having low testosterone levels. So, you know one I Think that we live in a quote, you know, like an estrogen dominant society and I'm gonna get in trouble for this But I don't care. I mean it's for a long time, you know, the men, you know, we went from macho guys to being how would you put it? It's supposed to be more sensitive and get in touch with our female side. Now. I know that sounds

Ridiculous, but when I'm talking to guys, I see that in this in this the younger generation guys the guys in the 30s and early 40s They've been so indoctrinated that they're supposed to be like super sensitive. That's one Second thing is we have a lot of estrogen in the environment from the pesticides. They're estrogen-like compounds and they bind up Testosterone that they more than that what they do is they kind of replace places where testosterone can go and The third reason as I think that you know just genetically as time goes on as the years go on You know the hundreds of years in each generation. It's not as important for men to be You know physically super dominant macho

So I think there's a natural progression where we should have a slight drop in testosterone But I see drastic drops and I had a guy come in the other day. He's 29 years old He swears he's never taken any performance enhancing anything and his testosterone level was you know Like about 50% lower than it should be You know when you're looking at testosterone show you what you're trying to look at is you're looking at the whole picture you don't just want a testosterone because The hormone levels in a human being I when I teach this I try to have the doctors understand that it's a symphony and You can't make the string section really loud because then you're gonna overplay the horns

So you have to check basically a lot of hormones initially See where the patient is and just try to balance them because the body does Do much better in a state of balance and we know that how about just emotional state, you know, you're better with your balance Okay, look at the movie. We talked about just now. Okay, obviously They were pretty out of balance for a long time, but hormone balance is all you're looking to do Okay, you wouldn't want to have testosterone through the roof Okay, and a thyroid hormone that was in the toilet because they play off each other and again You're gonna have symptoms and you're not gonna know where they're coming from

And so most doctors what they do is they run a total testosterone level They go okay, I'm gonna put you on testosterone, but they never check to see what the what the patient's estrogen level was And most of the time when I got men coming in in their fifties their estrogen level is elevated Estrogen becomes elevated Okay from testosterone getting converted to estrogen. So they come in with low testosterone and High estrogen if you give them testosterone without blocking their estrogen They're gonna feel good for two or three weeks and then they're gonna fall off because you raised their estrogen too high So I'm trying not to get too technical

I guess I'm trying to point out that whatever physician you see they need to do a whole gamut of testing and understand it and off the bat and then just you just tweak it a little and Then most men stay pretty well where it's supposed to be if you only check But after the first year of having somebody on hormone replacement. Okay, unless something insane happens I I always know what the blood results are gonna look like and I go mostly on what patients tell me not what blood work says Okay, if you're gonna treat a piece of paper, which is the lab report don't even have the patient's image We'll get the paper but patients tell you a lot more from how what they say

What they look like and how they act then that blood report that blood report as far as I'm concerned is to cover my butt Okay, you know and it's not med legal system. We have you have to have blood work to cover your butt and You know once you get somebody level you just don't you know, I pretty much know what to do without blood work That's about the extent of What I could throw at you in five minutes, you know, it's funny doctor I had never believed in it, you know I and after I had the child they said I had some rash and I had to go and get a blood test and my doctor said To me, I can't believe you got your wife pregnant with how low your testosterone was

And I I didn't even know what that meant, you know, and I have a friend That's a doctor that I see at all the UFC's and he talked to me about it We talked about working out and how I'm sore after the third workout And he said you should maybe give it a shot and I what are the real pros that you see like right now? The one that thing that killed me doc was I went to a late Dodger game with my uncle. He's 74 years old He's been on testosterone treatment. This guy walks five miles a day and Griffin Park every day You can't he's you can he's the horniest guy in the world if I call him at nine and go I got a chick here with a tremendous piece of pussy with firecrackers in her ass coming together

He goes to Griffin Park and we went to a Dodger game. Have you been to a Dodger game lately Frank? Dr. Yeah, you know you walk at a Dodger game. Oh, yeah, you gotta walk along way. You gotta fucking walk this guy was running He was fucking running with a hot dog in his hand and here I am Dirty years youth and I can't keep up with the guy and that was it That's what pushed me over that's what made me come see you and I tell you I feel great today as we speak You know what the thing is is when you have a low testosterone level You can still father children because think about our our ancestors, okay? They may not have eaten

Anything other than some berries for a month, but the way the earth was populated was Man our previous free Genetically we trust me we are wired and anybody who doesn't believe this lives in La La Land, okay? Man are wired to see to visually see a woman if they're attracted to the woman They want to have sex with them in the next five seconds Okay, anybody that doesn't know that or agree with that, you know It lives in a la la land because that's what that's how the earth was populated men jump on everything that was moving Okay, so even if they didn't have super high testosterone levels or whatever, okay

So the last thing that goes when you have low testosterone is Mr. Winky because that's kind of like the nature safeguard The things you see mostly in hormone and men that are hormone compromise testosterone wise is one lots of drive lots of initiative lots of focus more body fat less muscle mass Not great cardiac function Okay, those are the main symptoms that I look for in you know in in men

I always ask the question to me what do you wake up? You know with an erection in the morning and it's funny because you know man You're like, oh, oh, oh, oh, sometimes, you know, and then it will sometimes comes out to be like, you know 153 weeks. Okay, so testosterone levels are men are and men are highest in the morning Okay, one two most men get up to have to take a leak so the combination of high testosterone and your prostate pushing on your quote

Jennifer your nurse system makes you want to urinate and it's supposed to have an erection Okay, so if men aren't having erections in the morning It's not my my only gauge But it's something that makes me know that there's some that there's an issue You know on that point on that point over there's something men come in and go I can't get it up I Need testosterone. I say, you know testosterone only initiates the Wanting to do it after that. There's other things that take that's coming to play

That's why these erectile dysfunction medications work so well because what they do is They put more blood in there and they close the valve down behind and when you get older What happens is less blood goes in for various reasons and more than less blood going in that Valve at the base of your penis doesn't doesn't close down all the way So, you know it goes up and then it kind of fizzles out like you know have like a balloon So the erectile dysfunction drugs do two things they put blood in and they close the valve So erectile dysfunction drugs work do not they could work hand-in-hand with testosterone

But they don't replace testosterone and testosterone doesn't replace them. Okay, there are two different mechanisms But usually when you get older You know I Am I'm talking too much. I think I'm teaching here, but no you're great doc. This is I'm fucking here here's science has outpaced nature It has meaning there are more people alive now than there should be we haven't had a big plague We haven't had a big war and a lot of children men and women

Get through child burp and they get through their you know, they get out of the come out of the womb They probably shouldn't make it and science saves them then they get a childhood disease that would have killed them a hundred years ago And it doesn't so in some ways we have genetically inferior people in Math not specific but in you know in taking in the big picture and and science has you know has made that happen But nature hasn't picked up the pieces for instance like women go through menopause. Let's say one of those who are 50 It used to be 65 68 70 they're dead now if they don't get cancer or heart disease or get run over They're gonna look to be 95

Can you so we're talking about women without estrogen and progesterone living 50 years? It's gonna drive us crazy. Sorry woman out there, but so see what I'm saying is we don't have We don't have any any reference point for like what it's supposed to be like if you're 85 year old woman or 85 year old man without Hormones because nobody lived that long and the people that did Let's talk about men the men that lived long healthy lives They fathered children in their 80s

Tony Randall Anthony Quinn said their kids in their 80s late 80s, right? That means that they were like genetically superior and had unbelievably high hormone levels So the rest of us You know, we don't we're not we're not in that five or eight percent of like genetically superior people But we're gonna live as long as they did so, you know science has to figure out a way of Making it so that we can until nature catches up with and it will look you know

Nate the body adapts, okay? After a couple hundred more years Hormone levels, I'm sure will will stay at a higher level longer or Some of the mechanism will take over and and you know, even things out But right now we're like in a crisis when it comes to hormones I mean, I can't believe I'm the only doctor that sees all these people with low hormone levels I mean, I know I look for a lot of things, but when The main complaint in the United States is I'm tired. I'm depressed. I'm tired. I'm depressed in men

That's testosterone Now, let me ask you this doc. What? Yeah, what are the symptoms when somebody should go see you? What should they be feeling? After they get there after I start, you know, what makes them what makes them go see you? I mean, what would make it if it's if it's if they're coming in for Quote hormones nutrition, etc. Okay, they cut the men come in with It's really only one of two things Well, they'll come in and say You know my buddy sees you and guy he looks different. He feels better. He's like a different guy or they'll come in and say

You know, I look you up on the internet or some of my doc my other doctor told me to come and see you. I'm tired I'm You know, I'm really tired in the morning. I don't feel like working out anymore I really don't feel like doing anything and I got a lot of belly fat. I'm uh, I Just have like no motivation. I certainly know how to have sex and I just feel like crap That's the general symptom of somebody who comes in to see me. So Again and the other one is you know, it's not that I feel terrible, but my friend feels unbelievable Which is always a scary thing, you know my friend so that means that you know

They think you're gonna have the same response as their friend But they might not have the same problem, but those are the two the two type of male patients that out that I see No, no, let's pretend Your home will this help you work out will this help you lose weight if you go on testosterone Okay, so number one testosterone is not magic, but when it comes to the single most important thing Think of anything other than positive mental attitude Okay, which testosterone also helps is testosterone will make all men once you normalize their levels

feel better mentally and Physically, I mean nothing else really does that now. I'm not talking about anabolic steroids I'm talking about and all anabolic steroids are made from the testosterone molecule But testosterone normalizing a man's testosterone Does the single most remarkable? Change of anything you do for a man Meaning you'll work out you'll work you'll work out you're definitely gonna be better your energy level be better Your your outlook on life through this position your focus your drive will all be better again

It is not the fountain of use Okay, but it is the single most important thing you can do You know, there's all this this talk now for the last 15 18 years about growth hormone human growth hormone HGH, okay? HGH Has its place, but if you put it against testosterone testosterone is a hundred times more important that's but There's not a lot of money into testosterone meaning doctors prescribed testosterone

The pharmacist either compounds it or has it ready your insurance pays for it. Okay? growth hormone is Usually sold through the doctor's office at a very high profit So when someone comes in and goes I want growth hormone I go well I'll check your levels I said but it's more important for you to take testosterone And they go well I read on the internet I read on the internet what you're reading on the internet is Not the truth the truth is growth hormone has its place But it's not as important. In fact, I can guarantee you that if we did a study and I put you Joey

I'm growth hormone today For one month then next month I put you on What you think is growth hormone, but it's just plain back to your static water you will tell note You won't know any difference But if you're out testosterone now and next month I put you on What looks like testosterone isn't trust me in five days. You're gonna call me up and tell me you feel like crap Are you serious? Yep

Doc that's not a maybe and anybody who doesn't agree with that has a definite financial gain from selling growth hormone Doc this has been a great into your phenomenal. I don't even know all this stuff existed I've been around for a lot of years, Joe You don't look at when I see you beautiful. I was somewhat of an athlete so I kind of made all those mistakes that everybody else did. Oh Whenever I go to your office you tell me your stories about going to Olympics and stuff and throwing a hammer So it's not like you're just some dude from Santa Monica I just started doing this 10 days ago because his friends told him to do it at Goldchimp Hey, I could never be a dude from Santa Monica. I love you doctor. I'll see you this morning at 8 30

You take care doc. Thank you for calling. Tell me your talk Tell them your number and where they could find you if they have questions or a web page or okay. Well, uh, I'm in Sherman Oaks, California eight one eight seven eight four two zero six zero is a phone number Well, you can just you can Google me or you can go. It's the website is Office Ice at Dr. Burdici dr. B. R. B. R. E. D. I see e.com And Joey, thanks again. You're a great guy and this is a great show as it's all the time and you're the best Like love you doc. Thank you very much for doing this. I hope they get something out of it. Have a great week

I see you this morning Damn, you're going on that shit Lee I was gonna ask I'm gonna put you on that now for bringing a little cool And you're gonna be a new I put an alpha brain in my asshole last week tremendous I was doing jumpin John. Nah fuck that shit. I've been taking the alpha brain again. It's it really is When I take alpha brain if I tell you something I don't need to get high It's still that's why when I first spoke to Joe and Arby about the alpha brain. I was really impressed because If you're having a problem with getting high or whatever like coke or give it a shot

Give it a shot for 30 days. It's really weird. So give it a shot, but uh, that's why I'm happy this guy called I've been going to see him for a few months now since like I Think I started the process October the screen actors go Union the doctor said go go talk to the guy, you know And I went up there and I even let the guy give me a needle guys That's how good and the guy and the needle didn't hurt and I'm going back to this morning I didn't even feel it and do I am I getting a Tell you I feel a lot better when I first started working out when I was 415 pounds I was basically

Going to the Y and I was hitting the bag for 30 minutes a stationary position and riding the bike as I could go along So I started listen the first time I walked into the Y in 2005 I feel the longest yard I got on the bike for four minutes and the guy told me to get no no no Not the bike the treadmill uh-huh at fucking 2.5 walking and after four minutes That's how about that's why I started then the second time I went I almost drowned at the fucking Y in the in the Olympic pool So don't tell me guys about going and having a hard time. This was terrible This was terrible getting started getting healthy like right now

I know a lot of people who you know, this was their new year resolution I'm gonna get this and my heart goes out to you, you know, I started this resolution It didn't work for me this year in like December because we discussed it fat men alert fat men alert that uh that You know, you gain a lot of weight over the fucking holidays my mistake I didn't eat sweets or nothing my mistake has had a pregnant wife somebody put they're like You didn't know that that when your wife's pregnant you gain weight, you know, and we ate We ate whatever the fuck you wanted and I worked out the hardest I did and I gained the fucking 10 pounds. It was embarrassing But uh guys we all try at this and there's nothing like your fucking health and I saw it yesterday

I saw it yesterday when that little baby was born yesterday that I was like dog six seven years ago I could never do this. I was doing a grandma blow a night and my diet was terrible You know, I bought a I bought two bags of Fiji apples at the farmers morning Sunday. That's fucking gone They're gone already, you know, I make it a point to eat the and I'm a fat fuck But I told you guys there's a difference between being a fat fuck and a healthy fat fuck, you know And if you got to eat five apples a day, you don't lose weight so be able at least I'm trying You're fucking trying, you know, and I like to diet sodas and shit But lately I've been taking that water and freezing it, you know regular water and freezing the water

It's two different fucking drinks. You have a drink regular cold cold water. You're like, I love it This is fucking delicious. Well when I lived in Israel for six months I would take half a bottle of water or freeze it and then pour in the morning I would pour it in because it's hot fucking fuck a hundred hot 100 degrees there So when you would have like a huge ice cube and it fucking feels great Oh my god, cold cold my wife turned me on to it My wife fills up that thing puts in the freezer and then at night I see like a five stabbing it with a knife Shit, she's like shit is a little water in here. That's the fucking jizzy jizz of jizz. Oh geez, but if I am

I'd be interested to talk to him because I I was born premature two months actually and For my entire life. I've always been like the kid who likes TV or like electronic stuff and I like sports And I played sports until through high school I was never great at it. So if I had to guess I would guess I probably have low testosterone just begun and I Have no medical reason to think that it's just it seems it seems like a problem with you. Yeah, you know you want to You know at 20 listen that fucking the age of 20 who needs a fucking blood test, you know I didn't take a blood test from like 15 to like 40, you know, and I lived when I took the blood test and I called up

I'm like, are you sure I don't have herpes Fucking this and this and that it's because sometimes when you get a blood test You're like what the fuck these guys are lying to me, you know, there's got to be something that makes look again cocksuckers But uh, no, I'm happy with what I do and I'm happy. I'm going to see his doctor I want him to call just to see just to answer questions that I had I had a bunch of questions, too I don't want to do steroids age age. I don't want to I don't want to put any of that shit in my body I'm fucking 40 something who wants to be walking around at 40 something muscled up with veins coming out around people know You're doing something. Yeah, you know, you're lying or something, you know, I don't mind people doing steroids

I could get you know, if you're an athlete go for it. That's what they pay you the big money for It's these idiots that do the steroids for no reason Really you're doing fucking whatever you don't wrestle. You don't do nothing You're not doing nothing just to go to a bar and shit like this, you know I and whatever to each his own everybody's happy on their own level But you know put a purpose to it if you're gonna do fucking steroids go to a competition You know go to a jiu-jitsu fucking toilet and go do something go tackle something in the park Oh mug somebody I don't give a fuck when my friends are juicing they weren't playing they were just mugging motherfuckers

It may you know when you're juicing you want to mug somebody and throw them in the fucking river Lee Lee motherfucking Leland in the house. I love you Lee cocksucker Wednesday, January 9th. Get out there Get the fuck up get out there clay Guitars in a call in a couple minutes here. We got clay going up I love I love clay Guitars, but It's Italian day here have clay Guitars and Frankie B. Burdici But the other day over the break, you know over the break a lot of people you watch shit You don't usually watch maybe you went home and you had six hours to kill and you know galaxy quest was on the other day That's my movie. That's my motherfucking movie. I caught up on a lot of shit

That's one thing I'm mad about because I was with my wife so we had to make options So we watch galaxy quest that fucking that's my movie Tim Allen my girls are going your weaver I watched a little aliens the other day. I watched some shit over the holidays guys I caught up on a few movies. I caught up on Sons of Anarchy season one I just got two and three in the fucking mail, you know because you put the baby on your chest When we were talking to Jim Jefferies at the whatever he said to put the baby on your chest Yeah, that kids like that. So he goes just it's a lot of lazy time the first couple weeks. So Just to help my wife. I'll put a movie on and whatever

But one of the alms I listened to oh my god, I listened to Iggy Pop I listened to a Richard Pryor album over the over the holidays and I listened to What the fuck at the Peshmo the old albums when I did Eddie's podcast He turned me on to these other the Peshmo I just listen but one album that I put on just one day just to kill time while I was writing I was writing my dailies was Led Zeppelin too And yeah, it's got a whole lot of love on it and what should not what should never be and let me tell you something Like by the third song it was the lemon song, right?

And Lee I had to stop doing what I was doing and my eyes were tearing up I used to listen to the lemon song every fucking day, but it's funny We had a party in the eighth grade right at like a basement and they were teachers there I will never forget. No, I'm lying to you guys. It was freshman year. He's great my freshman year I had always heard a whole lot of love Okay, okay, I always knew about a whole lot of love and you knew about you know, whatever other song on the album I used to always buy albums for that song when I was a kid You follow I'm saying to you sir. You bought black Sabbath paranoid. It was for paranoid and war pigs

I didn't listen to the rest of the album, but I did but that was early on I'm at a party my freshman year. I was part of the gourmet club The gourmet club chips in every month and you the first Sunday of the month You take a bus full of your guerrilla buddies and you go into New York City to a restaurant you eat and you come back This is true story, right? There was only a couple of freshmen is allowed Couple soft most couples in a couple when we were freshmen my age group the kids I talk about Halloween County Let me tell you something we took over that fucking school freshman

We started fucking the schoolgirl cards, you know one of the seniors wanted to be the Louis the nigger Louis Hernandez Was a Dominican kid in my high school the only kid that had an afro and people's calm Louis the nigger He even called himself Louis the nigger because he had the afro, but he was really Dominican That's the kid we used to blow shotguns in his afro and watch the great kid and Me Louis the nigger David Rue as white your Donald Trump. All of us were part of this fucking Gourmet club. So this one sat a Sunday We all chipped in we were headed over there and something happened was bad weather, okay So we said fuck it

Let's just get a bunch of food from Jersey and bring it over this kid's house and the teachers were there Right. We're all downstairs. We're eating Shut the fuck up. What's happening brother Good morning guys out on the West Coast. Is this my little brother the fucking savage clay Gweta the Italian hammer You got it. How you doing? How are you my friend? Fantastic, thank you. How are you daddy good clay? I don't know if you know this. You're one of the first fighters. I've had on the show I am one of your biggest fans, you know, whenever you fight on there and what made me fall in love with you

Even more was when I met your family when I met your mother I Fucking fell in love and I want to get this out of the way when I was a kid I used to play basketball clay and after my seventh grade. Yeah, I can never might invite my mother to the games My mother would say when are you playing again? Never, you know, and when I would leave to play I wouldn't bring a jersey. I would pack the jersey and hide it and she would say don't you play basketball in the leagues I want to bring my friends to come see and I go nah, nah, nah I don't play basketball no more and the reason why she'd go crazy at the at the games and that one fight

Oh my god, and she start telling the ref to suck her pussy and fuck you and fuck you What are you looking at mom? They're kids you can't you know up to the game? She was great once the game started. She put her war paint on And I don't know who you were fighting. I don't know what fight you at your mom was sit I was sitting three or four tables from chairs from her and I guess it was your uncle and your mom was going nuts and I was loving it and Just you know, my mom is gone and that's why whenever I see it. I always say hey, man How's mom doing? What's going on in your world? You've been training?

Yes, sir. Actually, I'll be getting up here in a little bit to go hit the gym man. We're We're two weeks out from Saturday I'm the biggest part of our life man in the home sweet home Chicago too as a matter of fact So that's a 26 you're doing all this you're causing some damage, correct? You betcha, but man, it's gonna be great. I'm trying to get out there with you guys now. Who is your opponent on this card? I'm fighting this guy hop to the heel key one of these crazy Rice running Asian Japanese guys with You know, he's like a cello man or in the field manager to guy can be good fight

Oh, it's your brother. You always put on a good fucking battle You always And who else out of your camp is fighting mr. Seroni, correct? Yeah, we got Donald Seroni. He's gonna be taking on Anthony Petters man. That's gonna be a scrap That little bit the little guys are gonna be the main event a little John Dodson at 125 is fighting now mighty mouse Oh For the world title man and Dodson's down there with you too, correct? Yes, sir. He's an out of a character guy. You betcha. So how many guys do you have on the card?

We have four and we also have Sean Jordan. He he played football at LSU, right? Yeah, football. Yeah, pull back one a couple national titles and now he's fighting out. I think oh He's fighting a Chicago police officer Mike Russo. Oh Yeah, so it's gonna be it's gonna be some heated some fans out there man Poor between everybody, you know now this ain't the first time you're fighting in Chicago This is the first time since I fought in UFC. This is I haven't fought back in Illinois and Since I started my career, man

I think it's been about seven years since I fought in Illinois so to uh Decide my backyard. I'm honored and to be at the house of Jordan bill. It's gonna be awesome And I even won my Chicago shirt out of respect for you today. I got a nice When I did the show at uh at the house of blues, you threw me a shirt which is too cold to wear that shirt today It's a training shirt, but uh some other guy came in I forget what his name is mark a great guy brought me this Chicago shirt. It's fucking beautiful and I wear it out of respect. I knew you were calling so I put it on To let the people know I'm not clay. I love you. I love your style of fighting. You don't fuck around I love the hair. I love that you're a rocking motherfucker every time I see you you're running six deep and you know

You're the real deal clay. I mean, I don't you know You see these fighters and they got abroad with them nothing You're Jewish with your partners and you're always having a good time It's you know, you know what I think yeah, I think we're all kind of cut from the same Well, you and I have families that kind of cut from the same cloth just hard-working. You know didn't come from Didn't come from shit really didn't come from much man, but our parents worked hard man And just a lot of love and support and we go out there, you know when it's when it's fight night now We go out there and put on a line. It's never pretty, you know, I mean

It's yeah, we just go out there and get messy and have a good time and leave the fans wanting more You know, it's hysterical that when I watched that night I could see where you came from When I saw when you go out there you hear your mother's voice telling you get the fuck up punch him in the You hear it, that's how we I was raised I wasn't raised in one of those houses People have a big stadium as I can hear my mom screaming and I have Fuck that my brother wrestled a plate football and you know, I mean here understand. It's crazy It's it's something to watch when you see somebody and where they came from and you could put it together

You're like, oh, I fucking get it now. I get white clays like that. Look at his mother. She's a fucking savage Yeah, no choice, you know, how old are you now clay? You're a young guy. I Just turned 31 a month ago to the day actually Yeah, today's the ninth. Happy birthday, brother. You're a young guy. You got you got a great career ahead of you And I love you man and the fan the people from church of what's happening now. Love you And that's why I didn't want to take you from training. I always called you for the short call and I Want to wish you luck. I know all these guys in the church Any questions from my brother Clay Guita here Lisa. Yeah, there's the flying Jew Lisa. Yeah, he's a good man

Hey, I It's funny listening and hearing you say you wrestled because I wrestled all throughout high school And there was a bunch of guys on the team Who had kind of your style and I and I just started getting into you UFC and I I was wondering like cuz your style is is A lot different and there's a bunch of different people like Carlos Condit and all these people have different styles How like why do you think you have the style you have or is it personal or is it because you wrestled or what do you think that came from? Well, yeah, I'd have to have a wrestling background But did you look man those guys up, you know a lot different skillset than I do

You know, I mean they're very technical whereas to me I kind of make up for a lack of technique and with just a heart and just You know conditioning is go out there and I think you know, we're gonna beat nine out of ten guys just on Determination man and being dedicated and knowing that no one's no is better than me You know, yeah, I mean you might be better than me technique wise when it comes down to man I'm gonna just grind you to the man just because I don't give a shit, you know That's so it just comes from a wrestling background. You know how it is man You've been through, you know a season of wrestling a high school wrestling and let alone, you know in your case You have a lot to our high school man. It's you've been through the fire

You know what it's like to make sacrifices and the weight cuts and you know being around your friends and family when you can't eat No, you know just going out there and then getting it down there wrestling people are wrestling You know wrestlers are cut from uh, you know cut out of stone man Just hard nose and uh, it's built character. That's truly believe that you know, it's amazing when you I'm out here with all these Bubblegum wonderbread fucking Italians, you know, I grew up in Jersey and I've lived in Chicago And I've seen some fucking hard-hitting fucking guettys and Out here I'm out here with these wonderbread motherfuckers Though everybody thinks they're in the mafia and I see a guy like you that really is the motherfucking mafia with his hands

You really are and I gotta tell you clay. I've been out here. I'm gonna be 50 Nobody ever even talked to me out here clay and all through the years. I kept fucking with them getting movies You know the longest yard they told me I'd never get it I made a tape. I wouldn't put a football helmet on so my style of life is your style of fighting You got to shoot me with a fucking bazooka that you ain't stopping me, you know, and that's why I admire you I admire you because heart beats everything brother your apps I don't care how many fucking steroids you do or whatever heart beats fucking everything when I get pissed off You know, sometimes I walk into an audition clan. I know this happens to you

You look in the around the room I look at the room and I see the other guys in the room and all of a sudden I go to that place where I'm not good enough to be in And it takes about four minutes of me digging deep and going, you know what every motherfucking here could suck my dick I'm gonna go in there and take the fucking roll and that's what I do and I get that style that same heart you have so I Love it. I love what you do man. I love what you do it's fucking balls heart and sweat coming at you and You're gonna have to fucking shoot a motherfucker like clay. We need to get in the fuck Dookie so gookie and it's jujitsu you're gonna break one of those fucking limbs and take it downtown

With you to one of those bars in Chicago and bring that motherfucker at home Jordan's gonna have to shake your fucking hands, you know I'm saying fuck Michael Jordan Saturday the 26th It's your night in Chicago clay Guitare It's our house man house at the Guitare mafia built man. We're gonna bring it down the walls are gonna come down Don't forget that shirt the Guitare mafia and the Guitare mafia Guitare mafia. What time you go to train now today? We're not we're gonna have to gym in about an hour. We got practice about 9 30 a.m. Mountain time so yeah about another hour and a half or so and then how long does that go? We trained for about an hour and a half to hours this morning then right after that I got a

30 minutes of conditioning and a big big old one pick five swimming pool and I got Conditioning later at about five and then we're actually going to a concert tonight. We're gonna go see this This day is slightly stupid. They're from I think Orange County to kind of like sublime a little bit like pepper, you know kind of reggae rock Punk gas something like that. So it should be good time Like I said man, you live your life to the fullest and I admire that you're not at home reading some fucking Bible You're out there doing your thing and living your life, and that's why I love you I wish you all the luck in the world of 26. I'm gonna try my best to get out there and see you

I got a gig on the 25th, but if I get out of it brother, I'll be there yelling screaming with your mother, right? I Love you guys congratulations again, and how's the little one doing? She's doing great I was there last night for a few hours, and she's doing great. I'm really fortunate Do me a favor clay give a big hug to Greg and Donald and Tell him I send him all my love and that's one of my favorite that is my favorite camp I'm trying to get a gig in Albuquerque, so I go down there I was gonna go down there with Eddie and he was gonna do a band gig and I was gonna open for him Just hang out with you guys

I was gonna bring a camera and go get beat up a little bit have Carlos kick me in the fucking face And so I love you guys with all my heart, and that's my favorite camp down there. So tell mr. Jackson I'll have him on soon Yes, sir. That means a lot guys. Thanks again, and God bless. What's the little what's your daughter's name? I kept a little Italian her middle name is Sophia. Her first name is Mercy You know my mother died the Italians took me in even though they called me spic a thousand times They took me in they fed me pasta for zoo, so I never forgot that I still got my Italian fucking roots So that's why we're on my head two Italians on today. I love you buddy

Oh, man, thanks again. It's been a pleasure. Thank you guys so much have fun out there and be safe You have fun on the 26 and knock his fucking head off This guy's going down. Love you, buddy Love you, but take care big yet you too Damn, I'm fucking fired up today. I'm gonna have to go stab a motherfucker after the church He's what I'm talking about get out there go live your life cock suck There's a beautiful fucking day to be alive I'm not telling you this because the daughter and I'm telling you this from my heart. We're talking about Led Zeppelin too

Yeah, so we're sitting at this gourmet club part is a bunch of girls and there's a bunch of guys now There's bad weather. We were at this kid Robert Merlo's house. Okay, and we couldn't fucking leave like no And also a bunch of guys I see him whispering and they come over to me No, you got a couple bucks on my sure I give him my ten bucks or whatever and there's teachers there There's mr. Pallute who's a gym teacher. There's George McGrath camel breath and there's this lady miss Stephens Who's still a who ended up marrying mr. Pallute a blonde teacher like a G P teacher And all of a sudden these kids leave and they come back with two cases of fucking nips No fucking apex and we started drinking and smoking dope and listen to music and these teachers from the gourmet club looked at us

They got this stuff and they just left They were like, this is not what the gourmet club's about we don't give a fuck the gourmet Look, we through the seniors out. We through the juniors out It was a bunch of freshmen's and fucking sophomores and one of the alms They had on was Led Zeppelin too and I remember hearing it from the other room going what The fuck is this and asking like one of the kids what the fuck is this night? This is that one too bitch and I'm like I got this out at home

But I've never heard this before and I went home. I think I was still stone I put on like Led Zeppelin to until this day guys. I gotta tell you something. It is one of the greatest alms of all time I don't give a fuck what Rolling Stone tells you Rolling Stone never played the fucking guitar and it is one of the My favorite all-time albums But one of the songs that got me because you know, we're just talking about styles Even my stand-up style I got to take it from Zeppelin the reason why I wasn't the reason why I wasn't online all those Was because I used to say you never see Zeppelin online

You know I'm saying Zeppelin would never go online after a show and say thank you for coming to the show They'd be too busy shooting heroin sticking a shark up some chicks pussy, which they didn't see out Okay, no, they didn't just they did it's in the book. Yes. They did yes They did have really God's a little baby shark. Oh, no put it a little monkey and masturbated. I think she bit her fucking chlamydia I don't know. I'm just but I Like this style they're rawness and there's no more of a raw song than this that you're gonna play for me It's heartbreaking and now people before I play as a lot of yous attorney of the podcast Well, fuck you Joey let's up on their music things. Let me tell you something bitches

Okay, maybe the love song has a couple samples or whatever listen to this see if they could have stole this shit hit it Lee It's taking Billy it's taking me Was this Lee crank this shit raw Listen to ban just shut off read it do it motherfucker Can't get you cock suckers I People we have patience listen to this shit Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me now everybody joins in ready hit it Lee?

What What are you kidding me are you that's the hammer the God's motherfuckers Wednesday, January 9th listen to this shit What Fuck you with all these dumbass bands fuck re-enfuck bullshit the fucking guy jumping up and down with Jay-Z listen to this shit Oh Well, how'd they steal this you hate motherfuckers So dancing I can't a one What

Abuse my love a thousand times. I've a hard I try What we're not even we can't even turn it off. It's so strong It's too much I'm about to shoot heroin leave every shoe hair put that up Lee No, I haven't shot her wiggle for younger Joey. It's Wednesday motherfucker hot break. Listen to this now It goes right into the Sabbath hit it. Oh Shit here we go I've never seen me so happy This led Zeppelin motherfuckers. It's a new year 2013. I like to thank

Go to on it calm get the fucking strong bone get the get the fucking Hempforged protein get the by the shroom tech I tell you what I ran out of fucking shroom tech and for a couple days that I was huffing and puffing But now she sent me in the water so I'm back listen have a great day. We might have a podcast Sunday I got another sports guru for you the Philly Godfather We're gonna talk a little bit about Donahue and the whole thing. I got the Donahue book. Listen go to on it Get some if you go in the box you press church and they'll give you a little discount on there I'm gonna have Aubrey on for my next week to explain what's going on in 2013 and what they got coming up

And besides that. I love you motherfuckers next Thursday the Irvine improv Eight o'clock this what is it the 17th? I'm at the Irvine. Oh, they have to look at the 17th Thursday the clock and then the 25th I'm doing two shows at flappers and Burbank go to floppers calm Eight and ten o'clock Testicle testaments get released the 24-time iTunes go now and pre-order and besides that. I love you motherfuckers Go out there today and make them sniff your fucking dick and tell him who the captain Kirk of the enterprises Lee throw kiss to these cops I love you motherfuckers. Stay black. Have a phenomenal week

Oh