Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - 03/04/2013 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #61

Episode Date: March 7, 2013

Joey's childhood friend Billy calls in to talk about their basketball days. This podcast is brought to you by Onnit.com. Use Promo chode CHURCH for a discount. Streamed live on 03/04/2013

Oh Mother fucking shit Fuck Monday night football. It's Monday night the church of what's happened now Special fucking edition way before ESPN even dream of having a fucking special edition You know what's going on tonight Monday night special night. I got to travel so I got to do two odd nights I couldn't leave you hanging on Monday. I couldn't fucking let you down Monday. It's when it all goes down Welcome motherfuckers. Oh Shit

Are you fucking kidding me or what? March 4th 2013 Get your shit together get the fucking rifle the bazooka. It's over February is gone January's gone. You want to turn the fucking music off Lee. I'm over here Every every time I turn the music off you say kick it again. I turn it up. We have a we have a system It's fucking 61 now and now you're gonna break the system. What am I supposed to do with you? Don't make me stick your fucking finger in that blender cocksucker You'll be like Japanese jacuzzi with drinking fucking juice for no reason. How you guys doing?

It's a beautiful fucking day to be alive. I know it's Monday night, but what are you gonna do? At least we're here. I got to travel this week So I couldn't do the Monday and Wednesday morning format and then fucking Lee called me they changed his hours He's on the fucking 7 to 7. He's on the chain gang like So he's alright Lee, but he's still juicing. How you feeling concept? I feel great feel awesome I like this one than I podcast this I like it feels good. You know what by the time it hits itunes will be Wednesday And I'll get your fucking Wednesday jazzed up You leave the house like a motherfucking doctor because that's what it's all about. You know, I did today Lee

What dick who gots? That's what I fucking did today who gots I took care of the kid I had some family come into town. So I spent some time with them. I went to get some lunch with them I'm with the wife the kid, you know, I'm leaving for a fucking 10 days. So I Wanted to do the right thing and hang out with them and you know, it was great It really was this girl who came to visit was gonna stay with my wife and her mother and the whole thing I grew up with her brother. We were solid. We went to fucking Offense defense football camp. Okay, and I told you going into junior year. He died I was contact with the family. They were fucking heartbroken. He died drowning. It was like your best friend, right?

Yeah, from TAC crystal, which was a k a gorilla biscuits a k a pink Floyd dust a k a angel fucking duster, right? So They contacted me. I probably got in contact with her 2006 She contacted me when I was one time like this and we've been tired ever since and the mother's come on They've come to my shows and so they came over the house today and before they came over I kind of felt weird because I'm eight years older than Vita and

You know when I was 12, she was whatever fuck for my block running around and here She is a woman and the mother, you know, I know from the funeral the whole fucking deal and now they're coming over to my house and They're seeing the baby for the first time and it was just it fucked with me for a little while Why make you feel weird wouldn't make you feel happy. They've been there since they so I know my mother, you know Okay, they we've even eaten lunch. They were talking about how religious my mother was to an extent the saints. Yeah, and all that shit So it's just creepy for a minute that these people knew the whole thing and now they see me and It just always creeps me out. I don't want people to see the finish result, but they were happy

They got to talk to my wife and that that's all that fucking matters. Are they out here? She used to live out of here Vita used to live out here and go to school I was gonna have a call to podcast tonight, but it was too much. It's too much, you know, her brother died and Till this day she misses him. I mean 30 fucking years later. He died in 79 But he died from just weird shit, you know, they blame it on THC and whatever the fuck happened He's not with us anymore. You know, the older brother doesn't talk to me. I wasn't even there I wasn't even at the place where he drowned that day. It wasn't me. It wasn't about me at all But they were over the house and to see those people just a waste a lot of feelings. Yeah

I was a child. I like I said, she's eight years younger than me I remember her following us to the woods to light fucking trees on fire and break up the loot We robbed the van one time and see fucking not robbed the van and drove it But took the shit out of the van and turn up in the woods and hit it and she followed us I've never forget that we've all I've always asked her about it when you find this up the woods So it was just weird to see somebody and I have a picture of him You've seen it a thousand times and you come over to the podcast. Yeah, I had his eighth grade picture I still have it and I look at it every morning and I think about he's not here

But what would he do? You know, if I wasn't here, would he look at this picture and get strength from it? So I It's weird. It's just a weird thing for me that I kept in touch with the family all these years Him and I played football together. We got high together. He got a little crazy He got a little crazy right before my mother died and for that year after that He died in 79 also. He'd know he died in 80. Oh, he didn't mean he died 10 months after my mom Oh, so it was a double whammy for a fucking guy like me But you know what we move on and and it was funny because I was telling him I'm taking a baptizing a baby in Jersey at our Lady of Fatima church in North Bergen and she looked at me

She goes that's where they had Dominic's last Church, you know, you know, so it's all in the fucking family. We do what the fuck we do It's Monday Lee. Where's the song of Monday little Tony Bennett get everybody going. Fuck it. This is it Lee Did anything was the piano? I've got two bats of life at least for yet. Look at these two of these and for people who don't realize it We spoke before this. So it's not like I'm fucking waiting. Stop Lee. Stop Lee. I Want to be around oh shit Lee sing it Lee

Oh my god, here we go when Somebody breaks your heart. Come on guys. Let's do this, right? If we're gonna fucking do it Let's do this fucking right Monday night March 4th. You got food You got reefer your chicks there with a fucking flip-flop plan. You think about eating that fucking monkey It's Monday night. Whatever time it is. Maybe they were asleep. You're thinking of going in then tackling that fucking ass behind Women like when you're going in put that fucking nose in that muffler leaves sniff that motherfucker out and pop that helmet in there Pop goes the weasel cuz the weasel goes pop

It's fucking Monday night you said we just break out the reefer we're sitting here We got a couple people calling in we got some people coming by we got my girl in the living room She might boogie for us tonight. We got to talk her into it. She wants to do it. She's a good girl I guess she's funny fucking girl. He got a roommate and he ain't fucking Tackling or nothing. He's a good dude. He's got some you know, you meet some people. I got no fucking morals Lee you got more things you got more for a cheese some Jews got no fucking morals They'll sell you a sneaker that's been used and it's brand fucking new I used to go down to a that streak at the Delancey Street when I was a kid those Jews were fucking treacherous done

That's a good word treacherous Treacherous fucking Jews down there if you got there first though They had to do business with you because it was bad luck if they didn't say you something So it was the whole goal you had to get to Delancey Street like at 3 a.m. To beat the other Jews Oh, yeah, you said the first customer the first customer day you got to sell it with bad fucking love Joshua Don't show up that day. What's his name? Jeremiah Elijah Elijah. Don't show up that day with a fucking checkbook Like a fucking trick candle at a birthday party I keep lying it keeps turning on it's not a light the new I'm not to go right to the resources and spark the bat of life up Lee. What do you think? Oh shit? I like it. Oh

Shit, I was worked lately you worked a 12-hour shift. Yeah, I'm fucking those people what you do What'd you do today at work? I'm an assistant editor assistant to the assistant Oh, yeah, it's just just a lot of people fucking lie and they should tell me listen I'm the assistant to the assistant to the assistant editor. It's not like that one editor. No, I'm it's uh, it's it's a Basis it's tech it's tech support basically so I get stuff ready for the editors because there's fucking hours and hours of footage So yeah, it's just we're in the middle of to the the shaman film two season at two seasons at once and They're running 24 hours a day seven days a week and yeah, I mean it's uh It's a little bit. I want to say boring but it gets tedious after a while because it's you want to be doing the real thing

But it's a it's a good way to learn and you're working me. Yeah, fucking people in working in this country a lot I'm there with a cup and a fucking and some lipstick on Fuck it a cup and some lipstick on that means right there bang Yeah, the one and if you understand it on a larger scale than me, but it's kind of freaky like I I'll never have a full-time Job all the time like this job ends in like a month or two And I have to find a new one and it's uh, it's kind of scary Let's but it's just you're living on the fucking edge like Bon Jovi in 87 fucking you kid

That's how you do what do you want a job that you know where you're going every fucking day You're living like a secret agent. You're there till May and then in May you fucking decide something else and he's got another mission, correct Yeah, all right, then then what the fuck you got your green shirt on you got your goggles They're fucking earphones. What can I say? Well, you kid you get another mission at least can you imagine that the fucking same place? I know people have the same job every day, but that was one of my motivators I remember like early on I was like, you know what I don't like computer job I'm not even confused with no fucking computer That's job and right numbers and taking bets over the phone. I liked it, but I really like being outside

I always like the sun. I like moving outside. So a little construction. So you got to find a job that gives you both Maybe you mow the lawn and you fucking fuck yeah taxes or something fuck You've never broken a sweat in a job. You would die. It's a show No, I worked at restaurants and movie theaters and stores and restaurants Yeah, you do nurse eat the fucking food the back cocks that you keep you in the back Eating all the fucking leftovers may tell you a doggy bag to leave two ribs you eat to get put one back one Don't be fucking. No, I was a server at legal seafoods for when was this years backing back and you're like me I listen. I was a dishwasher, right? It was one all those

Take for me dishwashers. I was a dishwasher at the time. What's the name the guy that died? I've said it a thousand times the guy from Colorado Rocky Mountain High. Oh Denda called a tower restaurant and they all saw coke all the chefs are code dealers So the one guy used to tell me prime rib night. He goes, we need a dishwasher. You should come up You pick up a buck fifty and you thought I still if weights and shit So he goes you fucking prime rib on that like a doctor. Yeah, so I go up there Well, then they wanted to teach me how to prep. I don't like knives. I've cut my finger in faint

Straight away from fucking knives and making soups and shit. I wasn't good at that stuff Yeah, I like to smoke a numbing just fucking wash dishes, but it gets a hot bag there Like I like being a server. I like talking to people. So I was good at it Oh, I love fucking restaurants. You eat. I wish I could work in a restaurant who would hire who would hire guys like me You they know intake's gonna go down. No, no French fries gonna go missing and fried shrimp And well not like well that stuff they hide but like rolls and like the small stuff you can they I used to get like free clam They're clam chatter is so Yeah, I worked it when I'm Boston and I worked it when I'm framing him. How many cups a day G that clam chow

I had none. It's not every day. It's too heavy. You some with that. Who you fucking you know What was the best I guarantee you got clams in your asshole still coming out from the legal sleep food You're fucking that juice the best thing I got for free was the rolls through the fresh break the rolls like every 10 minutes And the chef taught me you you you take your thumbs and you cut a hole in it and you stick a pad of butter Do it oh and it melts it steams the fucking thing by itself That was the best English muffin. You put that button and close that motherfucker. You burn it. Oh, yeah, crispy. Oh That's good eatin right? Oh, yeah, it's awesome. He used to work at a restaurant. You'd be back there fucking eatin Jump jumps. I was listen. I used to work Tuesday night

So they gave me like Monday and Tuesday Tuesday was prime rib nights, so I ate all the mistakes I believe the horse radish The odors that come out of your ass when you eat horseradish. It's a different level of oh, yeah If you had like horseradish, and then you add that shit. They give you a benihana That sauce that you dip the shrimp. Oh, yeah level of fart into I love that. Oh, I love it It's like only that garlic restaurant L.A. Have you been there? No, what's that? They have garlic restaurants? I forget the name. It's just garlic. That's it You go in and the first thing they give you is garlic bread and a ball of garlic and you squeeze each garlic

I don't think garlic bread need it. Oh my god They have garlic appetizers and garlic meat and garlic pudding and garlic soda When you can't make plans when you fucking leave that no no because you look at one time I had a showcase like an agency and I had a party there And I went over to the and I couldn't even talk to the people Reaking and if one of those garlic droplets hit you on the fucking shirt They read you smell like a fucking one of those people that smells like onions I don't want to give no nationality groups out there. You know I'm saying I'm trying to change over fucking length. So

What was the other one? Oh, it's delicious to meet everything But the first fart when you go to a garlic restaurant the first ball You're like when you go to the bathroom, it's like the garlic colegulate your shit So when you first go to the bathroom your asshole stretches from this big ball Oh my god, it smells horrific fucking horrific, but you live in your life You know I'm saying who the fuck am I to tell a lie got a push to push hope the cracker gets crushed What the fuck a little public enemy on this motherfucker? Oh shit on a Monday night. Yeah, you know you've been to the car Forget the fucking name a bit of rain, but yeah, I went to a Rome other place on Sunset

That's a good place where they sell the machine guns in the back Fuck about anybody some machine guns grenades rocket launches NPCs and PG's they have a garlic beef That is better than folk of the child's really. Oh, like the folk of the child's comes with that Whatever no not to stick well. I forget what the name of that Whatever anyway, but they have a garlic beef over the child. It's delicious. This place makes a little thinner Off the fucking I didn't know they're real food I couldn't talk to nobody for two fucking days because in Israel. It's just like a coffee stand It's like a like even they have like little mini ones and they have actual like stores but Romans

Yeah, but it's I didn't know they have like actual food. They have desserts off the chain You know my first second time I went there when the wedding bra were probably three or four years ago You know that place used to be a Denny's filled with crack code Fifteen years ago if you were in that night at two in the morning you fucking leave That's whatever Denny's so it was like that show on Deadwood. What is that show on AMC with the fucking zombies? Oh, yeah, that's what was walking dead. Yeah, it was walking crack that Jesus It was gross in there one night sat there at a booth none of the booths Janet spins around okay on the counter. Yeah, and there was a chair guy fingering the fucking fat crack hole

Oh, I went to boot. I don't mind like a black crack. Oh, this was a fucking white Which is like, you know and she was fat and she had bruises on her leg Oh, he was picking the drop the cookies. Hey, like Drop those cookies. Oh, this was a fat white crack hole with like green Pete and She was with another white dude that was nasty and he was fingering it and it wasn't like he was thinking It was like he had like three hands. He was like karate choppers like one dough people Have that move like a quank. So where it goes in this way your hand is pointing vertical instead of horizontal Yeah, and it was like he was just like put and she was eating

Oh, he's finger like putting his whole fucking hand in a fucking fat crack host match And she's eating the water and I couldn't believe it. So she's didn't get by me some food in a leaf finger me I don't know what the fucking deal was. I don't know if they were together I don't know if they were smoking crack. I know she was a fucking crack cold when I see one All right, she was chubbed up and she wasn't like, you know, you see a white crack Oh, they're usually all skinny and missing it too. She had some milk to it But I could tell she was a cracker. I mean you could see it in her face. You could see it on her She was cracked up Jesus. I smoke crack

Really? Yeah, how do you make it feel? I smoke crack for about fucking six months six months. Yeah, and 99 98 so you were here to not I had to be 2000 the end of 2000 the end of 2000 was Jesus because me and Terry used to live on Shrader yeah, but that's street in between sunset and Hollywood Boulevard, I forget the name of it isn't that's how long I live here, but you know, no, no It's a side street there. They sell crack there Wait, you know where Highlanders? Yeah with a Batman and all those fucking people stay Yeah, there's a side street to Jimmy Kimmel. Okay, right down that corner. There's a building there. Yeah

He's so fucking cracked that Jesus every fucking night. They'd be dudes there. They'd be dudes on Highland They used to be a Kenny Rogers that that place that stand now used to be a Kenny Rogers chicken fucking joint Wow And all that street that yucca yucca yucca they used to all sell fucking crack there not well not yucca That's yucca mark. What am I talking about? But anyway one night I was coming home I was naive to it when I left new york in 84 crack was big but I never I was snorting it still They pulled up to the guy and I go, what do you got? He didn't say no. He just put a rock on me and I gave him 10 bucks I took it home. I tried to snort it didn't fucking work and I feel like it was cracks

I started smoking in the can I and I liked it for the 10 bucks. I kind of fucking liked it And I go over there every fucking night and buy crack and Terry would be in the room sleep And I'd be smoking crack. She go what the fuck is that smell? And I go it's the weed But she fucking knew what she knew. I just wasn't using spoons and don't like that to make it Oh, okay. I was bringing it home smoking out of a can of some shit. Do you ever do meth? To ever do meth I've done speed, you know, I did speed when I was like 16 a couple times like this morning stuff

Well meth is like the it's like crystal. It looks like it looks like a cocaine Then I did ups which are like a black beauty that's old shit. That's 30 years ago And then I did I bought speed one time Crank whatever they call it and Boise, Idaho, I was working the funny bone up there And one of the waitresses turned me out with this one And then I went to West Virginia one time I did comedy and some guy took me into the hills and once you're there and he had no coke

I said, fuck I might as well do the crank and then one time I was at Felipe Up in one of those fucked up towns we talked about on beauty and the beast one of those Viceli is one of those towns up north like that. Okay. I should have fresh. No, it was fresh. No And we did the show and I got off and some guy put a package in my hand. I went back to the hotel and there was speed I thought it was coke at that point. I didn't give a fucking I did it. I must have smoked From 12 to 6 in the morning It's 20 cigarettes in a pack. Yeah, I must have smoked 100 fucking cigarettes. Jesus. Just hitting that fucking

And all you got to do is one line that shit. It's not like you do 55 fucking lines on that You do one line watch tv your dick disappears. It's it's it goes into your nutsack. There's no whacking off It's just this feeling you're tired And you actually fall asleep for 10 seconds. I don't see you get up in your heart Then you think you're tired. No sense three days fucking later This doesn't sound fun. You know what it isn't fucking fun. That's why it's called. What what they call it What's the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over again with the same fucking results, you know Uh, it's funny. I was telling you guys and it turned into like a weird joke that I'm working on but it's very true how

Cocaine, you know lifted you up and I always one night. I was stoned so fucking high about a year ago And I wrote this semi thing about the evolution of cocaine And how I saw it. Yeah, you know in the early 80s and how it affected me how it went from having a good time You know to going out and having a few beers. Yeah to isolating yourself like 18 months later from uh doing it twice

A week now like fridays and saturdays still three or four and going to eat and going home to sleep Now it becomes something else now you're doing it And uh, you're doing it three times a week But now you're doing something you haven't done before You're bringing home something Okay, you're bringing home a little bit Usually meaning you would split a hundred dollars go to a bar Do some lines drink place and pool throw some darts and at four in the morning

We do a line of peace and we go the fuck home. That's it Now i'm actually buying an extra 20 to take home with me Oh, okay. So now i'm staying up till six. I gotta be at work at eight Fuck so now I start doing that one. So we now I got a girlfriend who does it and she sucks great dick And she lets me fucking put things, you know, karate chop the cracko and delis And uh, I got her so now I got to do that Tuesdays and Thursdays and fridays and saturdays Now you start hanging out with people that do it

So it's two couples. We'll come back here. We do it. You go to your bedroom I go in the other one we fucked and sunday Then you go through that then you go to a different level where now it's not a gram that you need it's an eight ball And now you're gonna start to get creepy like you're starting to hide it from your girlfriend It's the girl you've been with for fucking eight years. You're hiding it from your girlfriend. You're looking at windows You know, you start getting paranoid that I never got paranoid until Eight nine years into the game. That was a complete different thing. Jesus. Well, you can't leave this fucking room You can't leave this room Lee or what would happen? But I would die if you open that

Like you know how I get I would die if you open that door You do two lines and start looking at that door handle that nobody would twist it You know how sick that is that's crazy and that went on for 10 or fucking 10 years. Yeah, and then I got in prison I got no I got locked up in 88 and I came out and I stayed clean I remember doing it the first time After prison I did it like two days before I got married and the halfway house cut me loose They said you have somewhere to go and I said yes, I lied I said you go up to the property my in-laws property

But instead I went they had a trailer on the property and I bought this coke Lee it was so fucking strong And I bought a six panel six pack of coolest cans and I went to that trailer And I started fucking popping those lines and next thing you know, it was four hours later I had a big bag left of the blow and I was looking at the window. I could see snow guys Yeah, ropes like jumping off trees to come get me a machine gun dressed in white with those snow army suits on but the white Yeah, yeah, like fucking what's his head name and what's that movie of marky wallberg shooter I went to the snow and all that that's what

It was the craziest thing that I got to the point where I was hallucinating on a drug But you're not supposed to fucking hallucinate. Yeah, how the fuck you say in the now you said all that stuff in colorado I talk about fucking throwing away four ounces and the fact that kid and me went back and forth for a while He's a fucking flake, huh? Now you've done other stuff But why do you think it's like you you do like Something for six months or you do something a little bit But you the only thing you really stuck with was coke went in like weed, but that doesn't really count

Like what what was it about coke? Like you didn't like you would think you would have gone and done. I liked where it took me I liked where it took me. It took me to uh But like it took me somewhere completely different in my personality I would you know my desire to be stricken. I would love to leave here Lee And go leave. Let's go get a beer Yeah, I would love to be able to go to a ball like a normally Sit there for an hour I have to think and have a beer

And that may be a shot I can't do that It's the last thing in my thing. So when I do coke it makes me sociable at that level. Yeah, it would make me sit there Because I had a drink now. I hate drinking you've been around me for two years I mean drinks you see me had the other night was the first one You have like every time you go on you have like a fruity drink. Yeah, like an amaretto and milk I had the other I don't drink but if I'm doing blow I'll fuck your world up drinking like I like these guys a second

I remember doing two lines of coke when I'm doing six shots of jagermeister at the okapodra And people did like three of them. That's when I knew I had a problem That's when I knew I had an alcohol problem and a coke problem I didn't have an alcohol problem. What I did that was a high resistance to alcohol You gotta remember my mother had a bar. Yeah, so when I was five I already got drunk on fucking wine I already knew the deal. I didn't like alcohol to this day. I don't fucking like alcohol I like the social aspect of alcohol. Yeah the same social aspect. I liked about cocaine If you think I want six people over my house at two in the morning talking about how they played football in high school

You're fucking crazy But with cocaine you allow that you're part of that conversation the next morning you think about what you spoke about You're like am I a fucking jerk off or what that was wrong with me, you know Today somebody wrote me an email about how to Get off the cocaine and I can't tell you the answer. I just outdid my welcome And that's what people will never understand this country. They want to go to a rehab and make that welcome Cut that welcome and you'll never cut it You you you welcome you you get rid of your cocaine having when you're ready to get rid of your cocaine to happen

Some people are took Ray Charles. What 68 63 to get off his heroin habit when I saw that I was ashamed I was like I could not do coke on 63 I need a break from it And like I've said on the podcast a couple weeks ago the thing I like about my life now It's not the fucking podcast. I love doing the podcast. It's not the comedy It's like I could account for my life now For all those years when I was on bloke you imagine for 30 years you can't account for yourself Yeah, that's great. I can't say to you leave tomorrow or at one

We're gonna get together because I don't know what mood. I'm gonna wake up tomorrow I know I have 40 bucks and no for a grant But I don't know who I could put together at two in the morning at two in the morning I could bump up an able one. I'm up till two in the afternoon. So why make fucking plans? You know and thank god I got off it, but I got off it the main Thing that that killed me was I looked at my wife And I said to myself, okay, let's be honest that this chick was a new jersey chick And that she had done below for 30 years

Um, I could understand but she's she's never even fucking seen You know, it's not even in her world when we watch the discovery channel and they show those cocaine shows uh drug zinc Yeah, she asked me a thousand fucking questions and they're really surprising me, but that's not people's world The same way the fucking photography is not my world. I know nothing about it. I know nothing about editing Yeah, you know saying there's some things that you know about and there's some things you're uh Foreign to you. Not even foreign. You're you know about but not really she had no idea about blowing how it works And she just knew my bank account was like She just knew that she'd wake up in the morning some morning. She'd go. Why is that 60 dollars missing from my account?

Let's say I needed money for a t-shirt last night. She fucking knew You don't think she fucking knew what's the musically. Let's hear it. What do you got funk with joey? You want to do uh, you want to do a little must be the music for your joy. You can make you wiggle I know you worked all day. You haven't burnt. No fucking calories. I've burned calories. How many calories did you burn? Eight million mind your business We go funk with your oh shit Oh shit little old school disco for you cocksuckers break up the quailudes and the cough medicine Jill Himetsu where the fuck are you hope everything's all right and believe girl

Or let's do some shout out to this motherfucker must be the music lastly what? Now baby Oh, shit Give me a little wiggle a little green doll up those shirts hit it That's all those shirts and see That's a bad motherfucking lucky shirt. That's a real juice shirt way to That just tells you i'm going for fucking paper today, motherfucker

Let's give a shout out to my main man Jewish fucking lightning death squad kinetic kids death squad new jersey. I'm coming for you motherfuckers. You bad motherfuckers My man, gervais jarrod gore death squad Washington rob mackenzie Strong on the bike whatever the fucking is strong you on the bike leon neck bone. What are you doing time? You black cocksucker get out. Give me a shout out. Let me know you're still around stranger. All right Park the fuck school parking fuck school. You're watching the podcast. There's an education itself What are you gonna learn at school? How the fucking what the capital of iran is who gives a fuck

Do your thing roll that fucking up league. You're slacking. Look at this baseball bat I got two of them if I had a string i'd make new charts and leaves over there giggling like a cocksucker Let's go. Let's smoke some fucking pot league. It's 10 o'clock. We're waiting for people to call Jr. Gomez is here. Everybody's here tonight. I love it much respect and much love. Thank you for adjusting to the schedule The church of what's happening now is getting better and fucking better a shout out to the fucking our sponsors I love you motherfucker on it Products are getting better. I'm waiting to come back from New Orleans and i'm gonna do that to star strong booster And i'm gonna keep you posted. I'm gonna do a fucking together

I'm gonna fucking grow get muscles leo be 90 pounds lighter by the time I get from New Orleans. Oh shit Lee you got smokes and joints I've smoked joints already. Well, jr. Starner just tweeted this awesome picture or something It's it. No, it's my logo, but it's like fucking on metal or something Whoa, I don't know what the fuck that is. Don't worry about the logo. I like having a logo. Give me a break Fucking logo. Get over here smokes and reefer. That's the logo Fucking logo like you're four years old Y'all have a logo on your four years old

Huh, you know have a logo on your four What are you bothering me for with the questions there and church of what's happening now? Monday night, we're all together go get a snack get some yogurt with some granola do a doche Do a fucking fruit box Do a juice do something you're up late tonight. I love you motherfuckers Shout out to the midwest Jersey fucking the south New Orleans brown paper ticket lat knew it theater

I will be there Friday night again brown paper tickets And sunday night march 10th eight o'clock brown paper tickets. Don't fucking those tickets are gonna go don't come crying to me Uncle Joe, we didn't know we bought fucking crawdads. I don't give a fuck if you got crabbing your ass What's up, dog? Oh, not much man. Where'd you go? What do you mean? You're gonna hit me disappear. What what am I dealing with here? I can't be aware Over here for this fucking Puerto Ricans right now jumping up and down testing on the products

And you're over here, you know Are you gonna work out when you're in New Orleans? Fuck. Yes. I'm bringing my I'm bringing my alpha brain. I'm bringing my Shroom tech. I'm bringing the hemp. I got a little blender. I'm gonna get ready. I got a little stay a little chubby for this role I'm supposed to be a fat fucking trainer. That's what makes the Thing funny. He's a boxing trainer, but he's a fat fuck. What kind of boxing trainer am I? Boxing whatever the fuck It's a beautiful night to be alive. I love you motherfuckers. Look at this room again. It looks like Yeah, I love when we get stoned and smoke in here. This ain't no Michael Jack. Where's my glasses now?

What the fuck? Well, you gotta tell me I'm sitting here Like some school teacher you're an intellectual. Yeah, get the fuck out of here I got fucking glasses on I hate those phony motherfuckers. Everybody's doing it now kills me Could you do could you do contact? I could never stick my finger in my eye You know what? I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll stick my finger in your fucking eyes that see how that works for you I still gotta leave even at 10 58 whatever time of the day 9 30 You know smoking it'll leave me like an orphan. I'm gonna take one more. I gotta go to bed. It says

Fucking number for uncle Joey that there's kid starving out there There's americans fucking on the frontline shooting fucking people right now So you can breathe and smoke reefer you sit with an Israeli flag behind you There's a couple of Jews throwing rocks right now with sandals on jumping up and down So you can do this podcast and you're sitting there disrespect. This is what I got to deal with people And I'm gonna see a big hit a little more from the lungs Come on. Come on. Come on. Let me see you blow that fucking smoke Look at that. There's a boy

Not chasing China would be proud of you. I'm saying here we are And I'm we're not gonna do a podcast to the following friday Because I'm not just gonna be on time. I might do a call on monday. So monday morning at 7 a.m. If you're ready I might be ready 7 a.m. 6 a.m. Same thing. I'll do it from fucking New Orleans Yeah, we'll call the number and we'll do it fucking live me and you from one coast and yet I'll tell you what's going on because I'm off monday. What time you gotta be at working with it Uh, hopefully hopefully at night. I'll find out that I'm fucking putting you back at night I'm just eight to eight. So I found out today. I made a call

They keep me on eight to eight till fucking june. This is how they're gonna close the contract Uh, you think they're gonna make you sit there going in at night and you know, tuck your toes and jerk off under the desk Like you do cocksucker. You gotta go in there and earn you fuck No, I'm fucking jerking off under the desk. The one good thing about this week is I'm not missing nothing like I'm back Before that Diaz Gsp fight and I'm very excited about that. I'm very excited about that card very seldom Do I got excited? They got like three or four good fucking fights on there. So we'll be missing. We'll be back by that Who else is on the fight? Hmm Carlos conduit

Against charlie campan the professionalism on this podcast. I can't even believe it. What's that? It's the guy that's supposed to call me I guarantee I don't even know the fuck this is but I ain't taking it right now. I forgot to turn the ring around I'm joking. Um Yeah, I'm really excited for the gsp Diaz because those like I said, those are the fighters I like that like the fight and they'll actually it'll be entertaining. It won't be one person Running one person right now. You got johnny hendrix. Okay against uh conduit you have uh

You have uh Ellen burger against Nate marquardt and this could be do or die for Nate marquardt. So this is a great fight Mm-hmm. Uh, you have a couple fucking there you go. See Oh, shit Oh, shit. What's up, beautiful What's going on brother? How are you? How are you my friend? I'm good. Coco. I couldn't be better I'm happy you got the call in tell tell tell tell these motherfuckers who's on the phone billy

I Am just one of many of the lesion Of coco Diaz admirers friends posse From the neighborhood back in north virgin The legendary city on the cliffs overlooking Manhattan And I'm a lot older than you but we used to play basketball together and unlike my other friends of the criminals Bill mr. Horrenda is a successful fucking dude, and he's always been an honest

acquaintance, he's known some of the friends I grew up with we basically grew up at the same deli Which is no longer there How you doing exactly how you doing buddy? Coco all's well, man. All's well. I'm just uh, you know, it's funny. I gotta tell you that uh, you know, obviously It's been great Getting caught up with you and I'm at a gas station yesterday in Sacramento and two kids who I coached in basketball When they were on their way up huge fans of yours the Peterson brothers stopped me and

They're all asking their huge fans and follow you all over the podcast and everything so all as well I can't complain. I've got three daughters married and uh, it's very kind of you to point out They're older than me, but I look like matthew's a lot like the oldest man on earth You know what's tremendous? You look tremendous. You still I still see your face Every time I look at your facebook picture, billy. I see you dribbling the ball Walking into hashways looking for a fucking game Like he was one of those guys that was always looking for a game like what's going on who wants to do this And he would get to the point where he pushed you a little bit, you know, you're gaining a little weight, dog

You should get out of that bag. You look at him like fucking billy. I'm trying to eat my little turkey sandwich at hashways You know because mrs. Hashway had the best sandwiches because she was losing the hair since we were kids mrs. Hashway was losing the hair So whatever turkey sandwich a you always got a hair with it Her classic was roast beef on rye. This deli was a real fucking deli we grew up at It was funny because I knew billy's whole family. I We were basketball nerds me billy is and his older brother was also a coach now. Where's your brother coaching? Yeah, so you know look look at my brother greg is the head coach at you mass lull outside of boston

Where I played in college and then uh, they're actually moving on to the american east conference With me and to amp shooter vermont Uh, and stony brook schools that are you know in that conference Of binghamton university, maryland-bolton more counties. There's a lot of excitement up there around that And yes, you guys I mean, I remember you would tell me my dad took you guys to the legendary five-star basketball camp out in pennsylvania with Howard garfinkel and uh You know, you're right. It was always it was always about the next game who's got next I mean if we had a quarter to buy an rc at hashways after we were living large

I mean that was that was life back then. It was beautiful too It was uh for people it was a little coffee shot It was a little deli and three doors down was this basketball court that belonged to the church And they were supposed to close at nine. They never closed it and I mean we had some fucking battles there Basketball, I remember playing basketball This is this is an unbelievable story to tell but I'll tell you because you could believe it I remember being there At two in the morning my eighth grade summer

And I'm playing one-on-one three three point games With danie calandrillo Anthony sin sulo And what was the good nicky the seglia? Was that a big cocoa? Was it was a francis shown? No, no, no, it was it was uh, yeah calandrillo because he was it was it was his friend's brother In fact, his brother was even there. Paul land was there who was an actor who did a few movies and he had a model friend

And his friend was nicky the seglia Yes Exactly. In fact, somebody just sent me Footage of a guy from union city a greek guy Nicky something that went on to play in the in the olympic trials with larry bird So somebody that listens to the podcast just sent me that nicky gallus Nicky was cocoa. Exactly. Nicky gallus. See we're basketball nerds guys and we're bad. I just listen to this. I'm in fucking I'm with red band one of the guys from joe rogan's buddy and we're in atlanta at the omni and we're eating lunch

And we're staying there and i'm looking at this fucking table billy and who's there But the guy from union city. I can't uh bobby uh, you know tommy hindson tommy hindson And i'm looking at this And i'm looking at this motherfucker and he gets up and he starts walking turns on you. Excuse me. Mr. Huntington. He goes. Yeah, I go listen. I play for st. Michael c yl his fucking eyes lit up He's like, come on. Yeah, man. I was there when uh, danny broke your fucking record that night when he had 61 points He had a tear in his eye. It's always great to see you basketball guys

It really is as you can tell you didn't know I was a basketball guy. Did you lily say? I knew you played it. I didn't know you liked it this much Oh, I love it and I remember going up to hashways meeting your dad and your dad took us to port authority Where we took a bus to pennsylvania. They go to league garfield. What was his name? Get gawk fickle howard gawk fickle the guy that ran that camp the king of the fucking jews. He was paunches pilot's nephew So what do you do now? What exactly what are you doing now? Yeah, so you know what? Go to the uh, you know what i'm putting out during the day. Um, I run the positive coaching alliance

Which is a nonprofit founded its name for all about better athletes better people and we do workshops for kids for coaches and parents Uh at schools at leagues and you know, we have folks like uh from lionel holland's the dusty baker to phil jackson uh home edwards literally dozens of folks our national advisory board that You know reinforce what we do with their players so the content's all focused on the latest research based sports psychology And uh, so that's what I do during the day is basically go out raise money do workshops Uh for kids up here in uh in more than california specifically

and then at the Get broadcasting work on right here side with primarily with the uc davis radio network to remember the big west Or with long beach state forwarding cal poly Uh, it's that and then I've also worked for Of the emspn family and that which is an act always always time one or two people Contest hometown network. So that's kind of you know, I just feel really fortunate to kind of speed in Uh athletics both so during the day and then also with uh, look with some of the broadcasting work that I've been fortunate to get I mean nothing

Surprises me about what you're doing right now because between you and pete sagrell You mother fuckers that talk sports the whole morning, you know Right, right, right. You know what I gotta tell you it's really ironic last season I'm down at a tournament in San Diego state and who's in the tournament but brian uh university out of rhod island and Who's son is on the team by dany calendar or son? And I'm sitting there and I turn around and you see davis who played in the first game And I turn around there's two rows

behind me Danny So we're hogging and and uh Danny came to back the our hotel and I had him on Uh, the next thing is a halftime Jackson. I listened to him. I listened to the interview He did yes, absolutely. Come on now. I mean Uh, for these people don't know it Uh, when you have an idol when you're growing up and there's somebody you like They're distant. We had our idol right there. He was a an Italian kid that was six foot two That could shoot the fuck out of the ball

That ended up going to seat in hall leading the nation in scoring and then got drafted by the Celtics But he was six foot two, you know what I'm saying? I mean, I don't even know if he played or he got picked up But what he did for us growing up and my lion bill. I mean He gave you hope I mean Koto he was right. He was larger than life And I think the thing about Danny in addition to Him being a great player and he was one of the pioneers in the big east You're right

And I mean he was a legendary scorer before the three-point line And he always had a huge heart. It was never too busy to help kids like us You know, uh, you know on the way up that had aspirations to play In college and I mean he's you know family situation was unbelievable and that you know, you had you know, literally I mean 10 siblings and his parents had You know issues went with their hearing and it was just an incredible family And an incredible story he played for bill raftery who now, you know, everyone knows is as an analyst

But that was the night I mean following that north bergen high school state championship team and his first game You mentioned making gala earlier Was at walston nation at sheet hall And georgia tech came in with bobby prebbins and sammy drummer playing Ranked 20th of the country. This is before the internet. That was huge news The magazine had to stand that day It was Danny's first game. I remember being at that game And of course that was like being totally bitten by the college basketball blog. It was like, okay. That's what I want to do

That's what I want to Aspire to but yeah, he was just an absolute You know, let's get every figure and a great guy to this day, no doubt, you know, it was funny because uh I still It's um, I remember everything he fucking did in that auditorium, but The thing that I remember the most was in the eighth grade. We had barone Who's going to call him to the podcast?

You know, I had him as a seventh grade teacher But at the time I was in the eighth grade and barone in those days North bergen switch from the traditional teacher thing to that you had to go to three different teachers a day So that night barone was telling us about you ready for this bill kelly chirpuka Okay, he's telling us about kelly chirpuka Who ended up going to know the fucking dame into the detroit pistons and just lighting up the fucking basket with a bunch of teeth He had like 80 fucking teeth

His father was the original elway and he really was he played for the broncos if you go to denver stadium There's a big thing of chirpuka in it the family on trip distributors. They're a big fucking family So it ended up that they said this kid was as good as julius erving was and he because most people in high school Score a thousand points in four years kelly chirpuka was scoring a thousand points a year or something something fucking ridiculous This is like the first guy and our area at the time was on fire. We had already jimspinacle With john spinaracle. We had michael coran little irishman from jersey city We had a kid bill will it be from um angle wood

So we were like fucking this is our area all these like I still remember michael coran playing the How old are you when michael coran playing the finals as a freshman against marquette? Yeah, you know what? I was bad. I think was 77. That was almoguara's land. Yes. Yes Hey, so I was 11 at the time My god when they said jersey city new jersey Yeah, you fucking get these goosebumps, you know, and uh It's funny because about a month ago. I called bill and I go bill north bergen minute and I told billy a story about We were in front of path mark one night. We used to shoplift path mark because we knew this is billy wasn't there

I'm not even talking about billy about And so we would go to path mark me fernie bossasudo glen conty and mike runny to shoplift booze but this one night Furnie wanted to snort glue. He was fucking nuts So he goes in to get glue and he comes out with elm is glue like a fucking moron that he is So out of the calendrillo brothers, there was 10 of them and they had sisters too But one of them was kind of homeless. He lived in the weeds or something Remember he would go outside hash ways in the morning and they give him a sandwich and he kind of like fucked up sneakers

And I never fucked with him at all. I had never I never mess with bobby cow So fernie Fernie comes out with the fucking elm is glue and we're like fernie you retarded You gotta get air playing glue not fucking elm is glue. So he don't know what to do with it So it's in his pocket. So this guy bobby cow comes up and he's asking us for money We were good kids at the time. We're giving them money bobby cow and next thing you know fernie takes like uh

The newspaper and he puts the glue on and he lights it on fire And and bobby cow it was like october and he had one of those working suits on those Those body suits on the heavy ones for the winter and he put it in his back pocket and we're talking to bobby cow And within minutes you see smoke Coming from behind bobby cow and the thing was on fire and we fucking turned it off just This is the shit we grew up with but i'm sorry bob Fucking tremendous light and bobby cow on fire across from the Hudson county park Okay

Get ahead i'm here Oh, no, no, sorry. So, you know the one the classic story too about hashways and of course Yeah, I spent a lot of time with uh, you know with the parkers and with the doritos and and i tell you Uh, you know, it's hot fog and you have to do the balmy steamy And I walk around the corner and back then as you know, everyone had a bill in hashways the paper receipts were taped to the registers Oh, I owe them thousands So parker Packers me on the corner before I get to the store. It's like billy. Just Joe shut me off. My bill is gone

Go in there get me a sandwich and i'll take care of you. So I said sure So I walked in and I said tell my husband most people talk to cheese running for me to a male on a hard roll And before I get bad at i Joe wants to be going billy Get the hell out of here these sandwiches for parker And I think I think years later in the Seinfeld show did the same thing But they did it with a fruit stand with kramer I mean one of my brother was out in california calling wouldn't that episode going on But it was just you know, it was just a legendary day brother and you were uh

You know chief along the uh, you know, everybody and they were half the characters and it was just an unbelievable Place to grow up and it was just tremendous. You know hashways was across the street from Gregory's seven-day weekend, which was a bar, which was a corkies, you know Tom and corkies, which was one of the craziest bars you ever walked into But to top it off it was next to a pizza place owned by a greek guy named nick the greek Do you remember that and the other day mike duffy? I don't know if I don't know if you follow mike duffy on uh Facebook he posted something about north bergen being from north bergen and torturing people and um You know, we used to torture nick we throw snowballs at him in the winter the pizza

The best thing I ever did to nick was after a while he got kinky like when we got to be 17 He told us if you rob something just bring it directly to me So we used to rob We used to rob wood and sell it to him. He used to buy plywood from us for ten dollars a sheet Don't ask me why but the best was we used to rob fake jewelry and give it to him and then he We had two scams with nick We had fake jewelry that we'd sell them and then he'd come back to so we could let us speak

I need to talk to you You know that good jewelry it wasn't because he called me spick right off the bat. There was no fucking around There was no, uh, you know, what's the shit now calling people by there? Whatever there was none of that in those days But the best was that in those days remember the ice teas and the containers like they were made out of paper Remember when we remember those they're fucking tremendous Unbelievable yeah, oh Legendary do you remember those they were made out and you open them up like a milk container only on ice tea?

well nick had them nick you go to nick to get a pizza and And you'd buy a soda but veneri who was a rich motherfucker Would go and he's italian would go into veneri's have go into nick's get a slice of pizza But he would go to hashways because the ice teas were nickel Cheaper and when veneri would be crossing across the street nick would walk out and go Veneri you fucking jew you suck But he'd say it loud like it didn't matter You fucking jew you suck

Oh billy, you know, uh if I was telling somebody it's tough to go to north bergen now because we have nowhere to meet because hashways were not a business Yeah, yeah, it's a very sad thing called another question And it's funny that we could I've always thought about writing scripts And for the last year I wanted to write a hashways script Because we've seen them at their best and we've seen them at their worst You know like the place just fucking shut down And this was a place that you know had uh when billy you you did you not work there billy when they had the

the picket machines and the liquor and the fucking sandwiches and No, you know, you don't want to go ironically I I never worked at there. I worked at joseph's drugstore. You know That's right. I used to get steroids from him I steroids from joe on the And sell them he used to sell me. I got a connection one time. He goes. Oh, you want steroids? Just go to fucking joe. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah But you know what you're so right dummy from the standpoint of uh, you know, we were I was back

Home with my girls. We have three daughters and my wife This summer and had the opportunity to go visit miss sash way and you know, I mean so I had to really put in the words You know What pillars of the community that they were and are I mean they were just great You know more than just friends. I mean they're more than just people who you know Oh the deli. I mean, jeez. They they were most generous people Greatest heart of people you you'd ever meet And you know what what they did that people know about the things that I believe they've done that people don't know about

Just to support people and and keep them going Uh, I mean, and you know, you you you know, like the guys like I'm involved in athletics now And I think back of like, you know, mr. Fafaro and uh, frank benna so already stand Newman I mean these guys and I was lucky, you know playing in high school Uh for jerry haligan who passed away a number of years ago But he you know, he was a guy who's in the class of like mr. Askelies Just these legendary guys that had an unbelievable impact on kids lives And you know, those guys are coaches but the hash ones, you know, and all our unbelievable people

I mean, I just can't Say how much, you know, we loved them and they were very close, you know Family friends didn't remain that way to this day. So it is sad and you're right like life, you know It's ups and downs not not bad about it. It's uh It's hard to explain that there was such a part of your childhood It's embarrassing to me that a deli Was such a big part of my childhood But if you really think about it bill in front of that deli is where I learned to be a comic

On those hot days in between basketball games when you're waiting and you know, gabby would pass by and you're asking to suck your dick and chase You know, I mean it was just uh It was I try to explain the people about where I'm from and for years I didn't say nothing you can't say nothing because they're not gonna believe you They're not gonna fucking believe you I just started talking about this eight nine years ago because I had them so I blow up in my head You cannot you know, I told the story about when I got chased by the drug dealer And I ran through fatima and they had the bro's bushes and I walked out and my shirt was thawed or up

I looked like the fucking it was amazing I wanted the hash ways and the guy chased me and started yelling mr. Hash way through this fucking drug dealer out of there with a gun Mr. Fucking Hash way it was a hundred years old get the fuck out of here you motherfucker Before I hit you with this fucking knife. I mean, you know and I was there the night when I walked in there When I seen the article on Carmine Balzano shooting the guy seven times in the back and self-defense That's you know, you can't explain to these people You know that I just tell you I went to west Palm Beach. Who the fuck do I bump into west Palm Beach? Little Stephen Mako No, wow, he's fighting for America's top team

Do you if these people knew who his father was and his uncle? You know many times his uncle bailed me out growing the fuck up. He was the mayor of north bergen He was a fucking man when you were a kid I used to live down 38th street and we used to have those metal nets Remember those metal fucking nets they had in the winter time. Yeah. Oh, yeah, totally. You know, I have more I have a piece of that We want we want the national championship division too at umass law and

I also have though and I'm just as proud of the piece of that chain that from up the court Yeah, those were wacky burials change whenever the ball hit in the winter just went the fucking net was amazing. It was just amazing You know, Billy, I I have no embarrassment from where I'm from and the And the stories and the laughter and I have hours. I wish you know, I tell people all the time I have a thousand stories to shame. I can only tell a hundred of them Right now. You would never run out of material and the thing is, you know, I mean, it was an unbelievable Environment, I think just to learn about life and having to negotiate life and and appreciate People for everything that they bring to the table and diversity or I mean, I wouldn't trade it for anything

You know, I really really wouldn't and uh, you know, my kids when we go back they love it You know, they get a dose of it and uh, you know, a little bit of better understanding But it's uh, hey, it's a legend. It is an unbelievable time and an unbelievable place. I wouldn't trade it for anything I really really wouldn't it's funny how you mentioned all those names that coached us and in all those fucking years Not one sexual disgusting fucking scandal You know, there wasn't no scandals I remember the only scandal we had growing up was fontana when he threw the kid off the bus for speaking spanish That was it. There was nobody fucking teachers and you know, all this shit

If anybody the boys were fucking female teachers at north burger I know like two gym teachers that got fucked in the ass when these kids were in high school But they wouldn't go home and rat to their fucking moms. I mean, that was just a great You know that hill just walking that hill but put balls on you. You want the st. Peter's also you got to take a bus Fucking two hours every goddamn day You know, it was a bus And in the past train and you know, there were times where I get rides But yeah, that that was you know to go down there and

And to play on ocean avenue in jersey city and and to go against that you mentioned players earlier And I mean, you're right, you know from this standpoint of I think I look around The league when I was in high school. David rivers played at Notre Dame there with the lake It was in a kenny wilson with the villanova darrell wilson played at ferris Like the florida state turkey went to old dominion. I mean you couldn't I couldn't stop anybody but it was it was a really uh special time at place and and you're right, you know jersey back then and uh

You know just the urban environment the feel of it Just the fabric of it is uh, I think something that we all you know, just really you know, really cherish I mean, I feel badly tonight that there are probably a ton of names that you know, I'm leaving out Just because it's you know, we just don't have time to just go through it all But uh, it's just great great people. You're right those guys No, they just cared about the community about the kids and I think they recognize that you know why Keeping us, you know on the straight narrow and on the right path You know that's how we used the way of making sure that all that energy was used in a productive way

And uh, you know, it's their opportunity kind of give back and uh, those are you know guys that I think about all the time I mean, it's not a data goes by that You know, I don't think about my father lost too soon Of course when I was in sixth grade or you know, mr. Halligan or you know, benna all those guys You know, just just great great people by the way before we get off the top topic I don't know if you know this and I I'm gonna put them together with you Vinnie Askley's junior is in school at Fresno Now coach, you told me that so I'm gonna try to try to get down there

So let's try to meet let's go see him because he's only gonna be there and then he's gonna transfer But I've I've been in contact with him on the phone and I tried to explain him to you and you know, he's 20 years He's 30 years younger than us, but the kids are fucking savage and once you talk to him Uh talking to him the last two or three weeks has really made me a little different Just talking to him because he reminds me of talking to me when I was 21. You don't give a fuck He don't give a fuck and this guy wanted to stay chair. He don't give a fuck. So Billy I'm uh, really and I keep I know your name is bill I keep calling you Billy because you're still that fucking

Young kid with the ball always enticing. Come on. Let's go play some ball. I'll show you what this new move I got go go come on Fucking hilarious fucking hilarious You know a lot of love to you and your brother greg and your family for always Never judging and for always loving me man. You guys are great and I'll see you september. I'll see you at the 20th of march Absolutely, because we love you to keep up the great work and I just want to thank you guys for happiness And we'll definitely what's the web page that you go to and see what you're doing

What's that? What's the web page or the organization that you work for? Oh, yeah, so I'm with the positive coaching alliance. So people can check us out at pca You know, actually it's it's probably you can just go to positive coach dot org Okay, check us out there Great videos a lot of really inspirational videos for people like doc rivers Herman words steve young brad steve and the young coach people are fucking hollands Are you kidding me? I remember when he played for the portland trail blazers with bobby gross and

Fucking he Lionel choo choo hollands was his name wasn't it? Exactly exactly and he uh, you know is the real deal coca from the standpoint of uh, You know, I think you know when people recognize that listen, you know Playing in college or playing professionally. You're like a milk carton. There's an expiration date on it And you know, it's all those qualities that you learn along the way that are going to really propel you to success You know, not only on the court, but also off of it and Lionel hollands is another one of those guys that You know, this really lives it and you know along with doc rivers You're here talking about a boot to when I can only be instead

It's I can be when you're as good as you can be and he talks about character They pass on guys that have more talent. They want more r's than s's. So in other words, they want more character And it's opposed to characters. So anyway, I'll get off my uh, uh soapbox here, but I love a lot of good stuff. A lot of good stuff. I fucking love it, man I'm proud of you man. I'm proud of you and it's good to see you after 30 fucking years and Be able to get a laugh about hash ways and uh, where we came from. I love you and I'll see you I love you too. We were so proud of you to keep up the great work. Sure, brother. Stay black and beautiful All right, sounds good. Well, thanks guys. Bye

You know, it was funny because we talked about this deli where we grew up and uh, the kid just fucking flipped Yeah, I didn't know a clue to that. It's uh, and it's really weird when you're a young guy and you live your life and you become an old guy And you look at people who were there with you people who you thought had it together and just lost it when I was 18, I wanted a big land hash way, you know, his mother had a deli. He went to school. He had the corvette He had the good looking Italian girl. He had the clothes You know, he didn't have a fucking care in the world And uh, you know 20 years later, he ends up robbing a gas station With a fucking hood on and no gun

It's just mind-boggling And again, you know for a guy like me, I have to break down two different directions This was a guy that was my friend but at the same time This was also a guy that used to laugh at me and when I first started comedy and make fun of me I love him as a friend But now he's in fucking seclusion somewhere And they lost a deli, you know, it was like the american dream. It's like scarface only with a fucking deli You know and uh drugs were involved as they usually are when you lose shit

And I it's it's unthinkable. Uh, we got some emails this week as we're usually doing some of the email that I was wrong about Dolce I remember Dolce was talking about Butchers How important it is to go to a butcher and get a nice piece of meat. Okay, and some guys said, you know, you don't know anything about Butchers you live in LA. They're a low of the place. No, he goes here and Whittier and I'm like, yeah I gotta drive an hour to get a fucking piece of meat That doesn't do me no good. Right what he was talking about was neighborhood butchers. Yeah, of course So you could walk over to this 10 different one. It's not one butchers in the entire city

In the city, Glen Hashway was that that that grocery store. Remember, there was a pathmark. There was a shop, right? But Hashway's deli was where you went. They had fucking roast beef sandwiches They had a fucking rice pudding that she would put cinnamon on and whipped cream She made two roast beefs every day fresh and two turkeys fresh. That's how much we ate in those days The specialty sandwich was a roast beef on rye with mayo, salt and pepper light on the fucking Just just uh, there's light fucking rye with this potato salad There's macaroni so that your asshole would boil with a

Would a fucking pickle, you know, and I ate everything in that menu, you know from the You know, because after a while you eat there every day something like now that you went Oh, no, we went to Hashway's every fucking day. That's royalty. That's where you went And when you didn't have money you put on the fucking tab And when you got paid you went up there and you fucking paid them back. I eat up there every day We lived at those basketball courts. So you go up there with no money, but no mrs. Hash was gonna take care Even though she was going bald and the hair would go in your sandwich You didn't give a fuck and if you didn't get enough hair, you'd even say mrs. Hash. I got beat today

You better see the fucking brush over there. I mean, this was a neighborhood A grocery store something that we see six of in this fucking country anymore because corporations have taken over anything You know, are you gonna be able to go into your supermarket and say I got no money I've been shopping here for 13 years. Got putting on a bill. They don't know what you're fucking talking about No, but in those days you could go into hash with them. Mrs. Hash. I get paid on every other friday in between that Can I send up lily to get fucking cold cuts and baloney and shit? No, and they'd say I'm so fucking loopy And that's what it's all about. That's what business is about. That's what's been cut out today There's no more customer service, you know the hashways were such a successful deli

Because it started off as a deli and they moved two doors down They took over the liquor store and the picket, but that was 1984. I guess what else was popular in 1984 what fucking toots So glenn was in there fucking snorting up a fucking storm But here's what's the secret. They had the lunchtime school crowd. It was a million. It was bro. It was a gold mine guy It opened at seven. Yeah, high school was down the corner So till three you had the action from the high school and everybody went to hashways

Probably twice breakfast in the night Yes, you went to hashways and got a buttered roll with a fucking can of coke Or you like a motherfucker or a cream cheese and jelly On a roll with a you who or a fucking like a motherfucker and then at lunchtime you went back over there And you got a roast beef on rye Salt and pepper salt light on the pepper. No pepper light on the salt Like mayonnaise Lettuce tomato sliced dead that would slice the tomatoes fucking paper

Not like these Puerto Ricans today. You get a chunk of tomato even slice paper fucking then it was genius So you just taste it the tomato They put a couple extra ones in the tomato stayed in the fucking sandwich when you squeezed it Not like these more you're biting to a sandwich the tomato cut you bite the front and the shit comes out of the ass Yeah, like what I ordered. That's why I don't go to these fucking So-ho fucking fake sandwich mother fucking hashways want to make a sandwich You don't have to tell them to slice your fucking meat thin. They sliced and meet them, but they kept the cheese thick You know what I'm saying? These little things these fucking gemokes don't know what they're doing today

They didn't fucking know when he was my bitch is going. No. All right. No. We got some music from me. Do you sit there? Absolutely Gonna smoke some more weed on it. I'm all set I got this shit the pope smoke before he knows shit a little michael shank that msg victim of fucking a little blatantly hit Joey's way to like it. I'm on fire to my dog. I'm feeling it I can't put out the fire He can't put out the fucking fire What's up? Lily? Lily? Are you stoned enough? Yes, I'm stoned. We don't want to smoke some more young people. No

Oh shit, Lee Can't stand the pain forget about it. Huh? It's a beautiful fucking night March 4th Monday. You probably get this wednesday Tune you up for the rest of the fucking week. I'm sorry. There won't be no podcast next week I'll be in New Orleans shooting working it out I'm very sad. You know, uh One part of me is very happy that I got this but the other part of me is very sad because I gotta leave my wife and the baby Thank god a family is coming in thursday. This girl came in today. Her brother comes in tomorrow

So Terry's gonna have a hands fucking full with my familia. Yeah, uh, is it uh Because I know you used to get like sad when you leave the cat. Is it different? Oh, it's terrible It's terrible. And then I gotta go to new uh to meet them So we gotta fucking watch the cats one day. You gotta go hang out with harry and for a few hours I was in the area and so on harry's fucking cool. This shit, you know, they're all lonely about you know Ever since we lost finny and I put a special collar on for deli's like a half a momo. He misses finny Yeah, they were together for years and they were best friends finny would choke them and fucking throw them down Let me do that. Yeah, see finny finny was a tiny little dude

Fiddle, what the fuck is this? Fiddles like two ways. He's a linebacker Take him down and bite him in the neck for double look at me like me. I don't get him off me. I'm like fiddles Fuck him bite him back you fuck Did your daughter look the cats? She can't see him. They don't even know they come off You know likes a super bad likes a Gray likes her. Uh-huh sissy likes it the black and white cats. Yeah, that's weird

The black and white cats play attention to where they hang out they watch it What are you gonna do? You know, it's pretty funny, you know, she comes first They take the second seat, but they're a tight second. I love my cats. Yeah, I've always and I felt bad even my wife says She goes have I been neglecting like you've been busy with the fucking thing. So we brushed them I got them the good cat in it. Mm-hmm the cat that they like the buds. Yeah, they still had on amazon They went out of business. Oh, really? But they had like fucking five bags left. So I got them down. What's the matter? No, that was me. I'm nothing So that's what's going on, Lee. Nothing dude. What's going on cop suck you taping the cell until the rush

Don't make me burn this in your skin and get the fucking info from you No, how you doing, baby? I'm good. This room has gained me higher. I'm fucking your landlord came up here today She looked up here. I heard she sat down and took a nap She's smelt this motherfucker Jesus Christ. This is a good room right here Look at these rarely flagged turning fucking yellow. Yeah, I gotta This week. I haven't been busy, but this week. I'm gonna put up. I've got a uh, what a godfather and a uh What's the other fucking movie?

Good fellas, good fellas. I got godfather and good fellas for this room. We don't fuck around ladies and gentlemen He puts it all together. You know, I'm trying So it was nice. I hooked up with billy when I did Sacramento once line last time He showed up with his wife and they watched me and Uh He was a nice kid. He was very nice and I saw him a few times and I was fucked up years later. I felt very guilty guilty sure because we You know, we knew each other who liked the jock field

And he started hearing that was robbing and doing drugs and it must have been hard for him You know what bro? He never judged and he uh He was younger than I was and he forgave and that's it Even if he didn't forgive by no, he forgave and he's a good dude, bro The render's a good fucking people and his brother's mom the dad And I had a lot of that like I said his dad drove us over to and it's funny because the kid that I People that came over today. I went with their son. She showed me the picture today of the uh, the football camp I went over him picture of you. No, it was a picture him with the shirt

It was offense defense football camp. I've spoken about it before it was run by like penn state It was like jack Lambert and jack hams in pennsylvania. We're going in pittsburgh and one somewhere else I'm getting a confused. I think it was just in pittsburgh. So I went to a couple camps growing up I like the football camps because it was six or seven days condensed. Yeah, go to a basketball camp I know not fuck basketball. I went to a football one. Come on. Which one did you go to? It was just run by the local. I think the high school. I only played football for one year. I didn't like it Well, I didn't I didn't not like it. I uh, I didn't play pop Warner Okay, and everyone else did in the coach coach pop Warner. So I got and I wasn't even very good

But I uh, I barely got to play been so I uh, I didn't like that but I I liked wrestling. So that's what I stuck with. I went to wrestling camps. Did you really? How long do you sleep there for? Uh, there was one for like a week and then I would go to off-season wrestling and would you get better at them? Yeah, I mean, I was never very good, but it was uh, like you said, it was a lot of fun and it was uh How old were you when you went? Probably 15 16 I was a little off on your dick

Yeah, it was you said something the other day that I've heard you say before but it was uh, it was on the sides It wasn't like it's on the side It was on the sides the middle stays bald. You gotta do a combo You gotta borrow your sister's mascara and shit fill it Me I didn't have a sister how they go this is mugging by mascara like a fucking have a fight you bought mascara Waterproof just in case you go swimming you're fucking jock don't turn black You're swimming you got a oil fucking leaking out of you. That's right coxsack over here. We That's how high you are you put your fucking finger to your back. You you little fucking coxsack. What else?

That's all you got for me. That's all I got It's fucking crazily, you know, I can't believe that uh I even got this Movie like I've been thinking about for the last two fucking weeks and I wasn't gonna tell nobody on the podcast I wasn't really gonna tell anybody but It was overwhelming because you know when I moved to LA it was 98 and I was 30 something years old already I was a fucking long in the tooth And all my friends were getting movies not movies but deals and shit

You know at least mitsy sure picked me up and put me in the comic store. Yeah That was the only thing I had working in my conference That I knew that mitsy didn't pick up a lot of fucking weird people. She picked you up. You're fucking fast Yeah, I was I was here a month and got picked up and I booked the pilot and I booked a movie and then I sat tight for a while and I went on the road and I really wanted to become a comic I wanted to become a really good comic And I went on the road for like two years and I committed to the fucking road You know, it wasn't like a half-assed. I would go for no money 300 here 400 here take a bus

You know, I told you get a blow job from a a chick that escaped from a strip club I swear to god, that's a story a chick that left rock chest to go to Buffalo Because those days a strip had to get a health license. Oh, okay. She had like fleas and some other blood diseases So she had any letter give you a blow job. Why not? I don't give a fuck. What do I care in those days? I was living a greyhound bus Who gives a fuck looks like you're dick, you know what I'm saying? But uh, I came back I did a couple acting lessons at Ivana Chubbitt who that's where uh The black chick that won the academy award

Halle Berry and the white chick who won the academy award The tall one this year. No a couple years ago the tall white chick. That's hot. She did the dance with the kid from on Seth MacFarlane this year Charlize Theron. Oh, yeah, she Charlize Theron went to that acting class Uh, Ivana Chubbitt and so did the black chick. They were both their actresses there. I went there in the beginning class I had never acted before I had done basketball And then when I came back was with josh wolf

Let me 500 bucks and I started going to Ivana Chubbitt and I went to Ivana Chubbitt and after I started booking Little stupid movies and parts, but I worked as an actor. Yeah, which For me was fucking mind boggling It was mind boggling the first time I got hired I didn't even know what cut was or director what they meant by hitting your line I just showed up like a fucking A stupid kid because that's what you are the dumber you all the better you do it Something's when you get smart that you become bad at something. Yeah, you worry about it

You worry about it, you know So and I remember doing this show and and they fucking picked me up for a couple episodes And I didn't know what the fuck I was doing So I went to the Ivana Chubbitt for like three months and I believed it And then from there I went to a different acting class because a little cheaper is 260 fucking five that class That's a lot of fucking money for once a week And I went there and I What I'm trying to say is, you know what? I'm not with a big-time agent

I don't have a manager. These people that are booking me have just signed me recently I never had a booking agent never went to Montreal Never went to really no festivals. I went to like Toyota comedy festival in new york It's basically a fucking joke and listen. I'm not crying this I all brought upon by myself I get you know, and I'm very lucky. I'm aggressive and I don't give a fuck See because that's another one thing if you're gonna come out of there and put your balls on the line You gotta remember one thing you don't give a fuck and that's why Ivana Chubbitt takes women and she's really good with women when she teaches them how to act

Because she breaks them down Ivana Chubbitt is one of the few acting classes that you have to strip fucking naked at Jesus, you did that? I I stripped down to like underwear, but I've seen girls there show their fucking pussy at that acting class Because Ivana wants to break a woman down Because that's the only way they can learn how to act and the point was proven With Charlize Theron and the black chick for fucking monsters ball. Yeah, I mean, she's amazing. Was it monsters ball? She wanted for? Yeah so

You know, this is whatever the fuck there is to it. I've always believed that there's something to be an actor I just never had that You know when I do movies. I'm the same fucking guy, but I take that I never Studied to be a great fucking actor. No, I never really knew new theater in New York I never did theater. I want to perform in large contest once freshman year. I lip sync shattered by the rolling stones Besides then the chick was a lesbian. She liked me. It was cool. Cool fucking class but I never really had that so now I get this call to do this grudge match and I look at the IMDb which for some people don't know IMDb as it tells you about the movie

The director is the producers who wrote it whether the actors are in it and I seen that it was the Director from the longest yard and I wasn't the impression. He didn't like me. So I said, fuck it I'm gonna I'm gonna not go to this audition because he doesn't like me Then I sat there. I thought about twitter and I thought about Stand up and I thought about everything I've gone through. I go, you know what? When somebody doesn't like you it's a story of my life. You got to prove and fuck them wrong. Yeah So I got that audition. I broke the scenes down. I went for it. I went in and I got a call back

And I went in and again that read with the director and I got this fucking role and they sweated it I never sweated. I just thought it was like any other role. I'm gonna go there and do whatever one day Then they called back and they said I'm working three days and they called back and they said I'm working opposite To narrow it really have my shit together And I didn't really think about it much. You know, if you guys listen to me and what the church is about it's like Lee You got to put your pants on everybody puts their pants on one another time just like us. Nobody's fucking better than us, you know Whether it's deniro or whatever the fuck so A couple of days ago. I really started thinking about it. I'm gonna go read with deniro

I never started off to be an actor. I know a lot of guys that have come to this town That would die to play Two scenes opposite deniro to be this is my second movie with him the first one I didn't do a scene with him Yeah, but the beauty of this is is that the way I've been thinking of my own land I'm gonna go down there have a good time and fuck him up, Lee And the main reason is this playing in fucking simple This is something for the fucking underdog Me getting this movie is for every fucking little guy that they told no to

And then you have to switch it into your mind that you don't give a fuck no more Because what do you got to lose? What's the worst they could say is fucking no That's the worst and I could say you assume by me getting this movie It's it's good for me and people are seeing me and it's great and we'll laugh and giggle But this is a feather for people that I've come here and nobody's giving them a fucking shot Thank god Joe Rogan talked about me and whatever and people took a liking to me We wrote blogs and we made videos and the ball is fucking here, but this deniro thing is huge I'm supposed to show you bro

It don't fucking matter. Just go for it. It don't fucking matter. I just went for it. I don't give a fuck You're not gonna tell me no dog. You you're never gonna tell me no You're gonna need a fucking bazooka to shoot me if you bring a 44, you know, it's gonna be a bad fucking day for you You know, and if you just keep having that attitude something good's gonna fucking happen me eventually Yeah, something good's gonna fucking happen. You the same thing for applying to jobs and no matter how many times they say no Every every author has that story. They got rejected by every by every publishing house until one person said yes This is one of the best opportunities for me, but it isn't for me only it's for the movement It's for a movement that

Bro, I'm ugly. I'm fat. I'm a felon. I'm a spick. I got all the fucking things going against me But you gotta shoot me dog. You gotta shoot me with a fucking elephant gun Or if not, it's not gonna work out for you. This is the way this is where I learned to do this And if you're not gonna live your life this way, don't do it. Don't do it. Don't waste your fucking time Yeah, you're gonna pick up today. You're gonna listen to what the fuck i'm telling you You're gonna decide what the fuck you want to do and you're gonna go for it Whether you want to play the guitar or you're gonna play the ukulele and have somebody shoot arrows at you What the fuck you want to do just do it and if you keep doing it something fucking good's gonna happen

Something even if you're 50 even if you're a 50 year old broken down losing like me It's still fucking the narrow motherfuckers for these agents that didn't like me I was too fat or too ugly or whatever the fuck it was. It don't matter They can't take away your fucking will dog. They fucking can't So, you know what man? I'm not gonna see you motherfuckers for a week. I'll still be on twitter I'll still try should I go get my phone so I can take pictures of these people in video can I put it on the computer? I don't know what i'm doing You could I mean you could do with your phone or the bloggy if you want

I gotta figure something out to keep you guys contacted with me for a week So we'll probably do some type of podcast on monday where I'll call up. I'm off. I won't take away from your sleep time No, it's fine. We'll do something even if it's just a short podcast to give them Okay, we'll have myself and maybe another guest call up and you're gonna interview him or some shit I don't know. Yeah, we'll have to see if I can take two calls at once get it fucking together. Lee always I don't know. Yeah, I got it. I swear to god. You're not smoking dope I'm not smoking. Look at the fucking shape you cocksucker. What are you gonna put in the blend? I heard you I already kissed it. You want to try it? Not not in a million. Come on. Not in a million fucking years

I'll tell you I'll taste that fucking Dang when you whack off and taste your little type of a homemade juice. No, it's you taste your sperm No, why not because it's barb Not you don't try to drink a gallon like that trick on the couch. You should taste So as soon as you drink the fucking green pride, I will uh I will fucking come on. It tastes like apples and grapes Listen, take that apple and put it up some apples and eaves and everybody else's ass Remember it's never too late to fulfill your uh yearly obligation or whatever the fuck you call it

To lose weight and get healthy on it.com is always there for you gotta on it take a look at the hemp protein take a look at the Immune and basically if you're a fat fuck like us, take a look at the strong bone, please Even if you just take a look at the strong one order the smallest thing type in church ch u r ch

Get you a little fucking discount Get you a little had a kazoo in the mail and you're happy everybody's fucking happy. You're happy. I'm happy and we respect each other I'm getting uh, like I said, I stayed at three ten to shoot this movie because I'm supposed to be the fat trainer Once I get back. I'm gonna join Lee not only on uh On juice and I'm not gonna juice, but I'm gonna do something different with Lee Maybe just do a dolce thing and that's it my friends I'm gonna miss you motherfuckers and the inspiration that you guys give me every morning And the music and my brother Lee you cock sucker. What are you gonna do without me?

So I have fucking days. Let's throw a party. You you you miserable I like that you guys took time out to watch the podcast and I know it's highly your fucking routine If you're in the east coast you want to be sleeping by now, but fuck you You gotta do like my main man. Whatever his fucking name is Who told school to go fuck himself parker? That's it parkers like I gotta go to school tomorrow. Go fuck yourself school What are you gonna learn at school that you ain't gonna learn here? You ain't gonna learn about the most important thing you should learn about heart That's what you fucking get from the church or what's happened now. Lee, you know, I love you. What am I gonna be this week?

Like la new it theater New Orleans go to brown paper tickets.com just search joey ds It's up there march 8th and march 10th. There's like I don't think there's even 10 tickets left for both shows combined Well, they better figure something out because yeah, you can buy it you could buy it on your phone right now You could print the tickets at home. You go to the to go to the box office There's no reason not to go up. That's right. This is Louisiana will be down there eating. I'm gonna go see my buddies at the fucking firehouse my man dan I got some other people who have been hitting me up. My boy said he bought tickets. He's coming to the sunday night show I'm gonna be smoking outside lot in the wet

There's a fucking hamburger stand That my boy told me about that says It is rocking I forget what the name of the thing is you have to get a shrimp po boy for me I'm gonna eat a couple shrimp po boys. All right, and what what are the little donuts that are in new Orleans? What are they called? Bay Nets. Oh, oh, are they good? Are they fucking good? They look amazing. What was the last time you ate something bad in Louisiana? I've never been to Louisiana. What the fuck are you doing? This is what I'm talking about

But you got time to follow these jews doing techno music. Why you You gotta eat an ecstasy. This is why this is what you're lucky I don't take this other trying to cigarette and put the ash ball on your eyeball. How's your dad doing? You're talking? He's doing great. I talk to him every day Call the doctor tell him I'm your your Jewish lawyer and I'll come down All right, maybe we'll get you down the next week. Can you take a couple days off if they pay for my planting? Listen, I get a couple days off. That's all I'm paying for planting. That's completely different. Do that on your own They can do it. They got to the bottom. You ain't no fucking Martin Scorsese. You come down

You hang out a few days. What music you got for me? What do you got for these beautiful people? Got some Led Zeppelin? No, you don't. Yeah, I said Mmm, you should you should do that in the movie your character. Shall I say go on his lip? Listen, who are you now? Who are you? Who the fuck are you? Mel Brooks? I'm the flying jew Oh, I love you. Don't forget Sacramento. I'm coming up to you march 20th through the 23rd or something up there Go to the website. What else am I doing? That's it. I got nothing. I got none. I got this movie I got Sacramento. We got the podcast and we got you guys. Thank you very much for watching tonight Don't forget if you want to support Lee and the fucking flying podcast the whole fucking jew

Shit, whatever that is. I'm all stoned to the gills. Go get the long sleeve Uh church of what's happening now t-shirt and that supports the fucking electric bill and all this fucking shit And we'll put something together for lee and that's it. I love you guys. Have a great week And hey, if you're the underdog, tell them to suck your dick Because that's what it's all about. They either can suck it now or suck it later cocksucker Hit it lee cocksucker. Ooh Lee what's going on? He took the long the music froze. Oh Look at lee giggles and shit. Look at these eyes. I ate a chocolate bar two times. Fucked up. Oh

I have to see how my roommate's chilling Oh, shit a little legs up and kick it off. You motherfuckers. Have a great week. We love you here the flying jew Your uncle joey stay black joey dears dot net for all the fucking info you need. Love you