Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - 05/15/2013 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #80

Episode Date: May 16, 2013

Aubrey Marcus, the creator and owner of Onnit Labs calls into the podcast. Steve Mocco, current American Top Team fighter, former Olympic Wrestler and resident of North Bergen NJ also calls in. This podcast is brought to you by Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH at checkout for a discount. Streamed live on 05/15/2013

oh shit it's that time of the day May what is it 15th it's the halfway fuck it's half time a fucking May and you're still sitting there with a finger up your ass contemplating calling some vocational because you want to learn how to fucking cook get your shit together bitches it's Wednesday May 15th my main man the flying Jew me Uncle Joey Diaz what the fuck we're here we're smoking we got Ted Nugent on it's not the song you expected but it kicks it off hit it Lee smoking dope drinking cookies drinking coffee cooking I fucking had a banana a

little protein shake who's better than me got up to 430 yeah you're up early this morning what fucking 30 I went to bed 1130 last night with the kickboxing for 930 we're home what I ever used to house I eat something at the house oh I have peanut butter nice little peanut butter on a fucking spoon a banana some water I got I got fucking super stoned the last two days you don't say that's so unlike you fucking stoned I tell you about Monday night no it happened and I took it to the trenches took it deep haven't done kind of that deep in fucking months I think I had like a bang bar okay I walked around with the baby from

801 okay and I got home at a quarter to 11 no you didn't yes I did are you walking you know this listen I have it for three hours in the morning what the fuck I'm gonna do sit there with I don't watch SpongeBob oh this is I thought this was night time this is daytime okay you know you can just watch so many episodes of SpongeBob that's my shit by the way it's SpongeBob Dora the Explorer and fucking Max and Ruby I don't max on rubies ah Dora is fucking good you know they talk about Latinos and issues and it says that your son could improve social skills and that you know math he's good

at math at the fuck out of here and then but whatever is my show fucking SpongeBob is the shit are they still making new I know you don't know if I know but I tell you this so I took a something happened at the house me and my wife with her and I and she goes what are you gonna do I don't you know what let me take a nap I have it back like by 9 30 I got to a beef I got all the way down the river side by fucking Lancashire TV yes yeah it was beautiful was hot you know I was sweating I had water with me she was passed the fuck out again what am I gonna do with that you can't put a child down expect to write a story or a

joke it's not gonna happen yeah you're under their fucking beckham call you could watch the TV maybe read it I have three pages in a chapter in a book but your attention is always on that yeah I said fuck it when I make the attention on me I fucking walk with it she falls asleep after 25 minutes you can take the son a car ride you like yeah it's like a car ride so after that she gets all mowed up I take that all over the world but let me tell you something I got back I like caught it to let my shirt was dressed to my fucking stomach so I put it down I had to run some errands I got back at like 12 35 okay and I told the

lady I go listen I got on the bedroom close my eyes right now so I closed my eyes till about two okay I got up brushed my teeth and I shot over to the coffee shop yeah and I wrote till about four I went over to the weave store what a surprise and I gather and I got a bang bar and I got a empty Dolores something like the one 180 milligram thing right so I inhale that first and wait have you had did you have a bang bar in the morning you said no no no okay okay I just moved a little reef in the morning was running around then I had the bang bar and something else and I went home boy about 6 30 I'm fucked up I am fucked

up I am sitting there going Jesus Christ shit starting to move by 7 o'clock once Diane Sawyer finished I was fucked up I was trying to watch Japanese college students I had some kid from New York was wedded and I was trying to play with him and also I caught myself on fucking Jeopardy with the suit on with my Yukon shirt on like I have a fucking fruit and I was like oh my god I looked at my wife she goes what I gotta lay down for two hours she goes what the fuck lay down for two hours you just gonna go to sleep I said maybe so but I'm just gonna sleep for two hours dog I went to bed at 7 7 15 I woke up at 3

I got some water a piece of tuna that was in the refrigerator and I went right back to bed till 7 o'clock holy shit and you know listen man it's not that you're lazy it's that I go so many nights on six or seven hours like last night went on five hours I'm cool this morning I got a ton of fucking energy I feel great the protein that the kickbox before I went to bed all that shit it just it stacks the fuck up yeah you know and you like tomorrow I gotta fly and that's you know I don't know if I'm leaving early cuz I gotta get them I'll be on the Adi Lang show don't stay night so if you guys have direct TV or whatever the

fuck it's on I'll find out I'll look for all the but yeah I'm sure you all the particulars today how you feeling you've been swimming yeah I didn't do it yesterday but I haven't I'm feeling really good Monday yeah it was fucking hot it was like a pleasure jumping a fucking pool wasn't it and it's not heated so what it's only when it's kind of medium it's like a shock but when it's a hundred degrees it feels great I am liking it and I do like the hardest part for people who haven't done it the hardest part about anything new is the first few days because I hate that I hated the juice past but now I've left

like 22 pounds or something and it's it's nice seeing it go down every day so it's it's something I'm doing but no I feel good you know you should do when it's hot just go for a walk around the neighborhood just ten minutes so by the time you get here you're hot yeah and then jump in and that pools like a fucking it's like a grapefruit there was um and I feel bad saying this there was there's no like a group or a family of special needs kids and other reason I didn't go yesterday was because one of them was just like doing laps like in the back of the pool just like walking back and forth and I just I didn't want

to have to deal with that so I didn't go in what time do they go in you got to find out what time they go that's the first time I've seen him there he's usually usually just walking with their mom or something and I just I didn't feel comfortable going in the pool we think we're gonna do deal no I didn't think he was gonna do anything I just I don't know I I'm self conscious already doing laps but with him just walking back and forth and then we read where I don't pay attention to I run into him or something so it's mainly my fault it's amazing it's fucking amazing how you get embarrassed in time so I tell you what I

have the hardest time what you ever pull up to a 7-eleven there's always that guy looking for money out front oh yeah I have the hardest sometimes I'll sit in my car and drive away oh really just cuz I don't want to go with the drum I feel bad if I give him money that feel worse if I don't give it to him but I know he's a young man and I know he could get a gun and go out there and earn the fucking money or get a fucking shovel or to be able to fuck you listen man you know what you pull up to somebody's business and you go hey I got no money ain't looking for nothing but I see boxes in front of you let me sweep the

fucking thing for you and they'll give you five bucks you know how I know cuz I used to do it yeah there's a bunch of there's a bunch of pizza places in Boston that will have them bring the sodas in or something yeah something you know if you go there with holes in your shirt with a fucking I hate Jews fucking tattoo I'm not gonna give you fucking work but if you go then look somebody in the angle you got a bunch of oil back here can I clean it up or whatever it's a lot better than standing in front of fucking 7-eleven and making me uncomfortable they make me uncomfortable it gives me fucking anxiety and I

like why do I get anxiety over this fucking homeless guy yeah if I give him a quarter I lose and if I don't give him a fucking quarter I lose when I used to go to fourth grade I had sister Anna banana I love sister Anna she was on all the nuns at Sacred Heart it was her and sister Angela Marie that were fucking cool okay but sister Anna used to always tell me two things that have always stayed with me one that reflects to me she's empty barrels make the most noise that's me was a stupid fucking people okay and she'd say that someday you know somebody would ask you for help that could be God dressed us up in the

skies and when you go to fucking heaven years later he'll be dressed in that fucking disguise and say you remember you could have helped me that fucking day and that always stayed with me you know my life is guided by religion the Catholicism religion in different corners and sticks with me and I didn't fucking know this till about a year ago that this is what guides me you know all those little fucking lessons and dumb shit I had heard when I was younger but who gives a fuck do they always find you they always find me and I made the mistake because you go to that 7-eleven a lot when I was in when I was living in

Boston I went to school and work literally on the same corner and I gave money to a guy once and I I was there every day and every day he found me he would shake my hand we'd walk me to the train station and it's just like Jesus Christ you can't if you go there a lot you can't do it well sometimes those guys you give him a buck there's some guys in a fucking really cool when I was in San Francisco in 85 yeah and I was fucking hustling bustling dog there was a black guy's name is Poodle that means pure okay and he was a Cuban dude that coming 79 the Mario boat lift and all the criminals and in 85 I lived in a

tenderloin in San Francisco I was crazy I used to have a suit I used to have a bunch of suits and I put the suits on in the morning that's a very high trafficking area and I'd sit in the hotel lobbies with a San Francisco newspaper and I would listen to who's checking it and I was probably was I had a great mind for numbers okay and I would see what rooms they were checking in and and I would just see them leave the hotel and I'd shoot up to their room and figure out a way how to break into that fucking room you'd memorize what number they were really where I'm a people and that'd be thousands of people

that was my practice that was my discipline was numbers you know a couple months ago I lost my phone in Jersey and I was very upset I had not lost it I the power went out and I was high on a banana bread and I couldn't get a hold of George and I had to call my wife yeah in California to get me the number to George off a phone at my house she had to stop what she was doing at a UFC party go to the house and get a phone to call me back with that number and after that I got very upset with myself I said to myself 30 years ago that would never happen because 30 years ago I used to know all my friends

numbers backwards and frontwards plus I knew their license plate numbers so if I was hiding the weeds and I told my pick me up on woodman and Magnolia yeah and I was hiding the fucking weeds as soon as I see that driver's license number I jump out the street and grab them that's how good I was I knew all my friends it was a practice I didn't need to do it I did it as a mental fucking practice so I always had it so now like I have every number written down that's my buddies yeah including your nice and I saved all my it's like a fucking discipline do you follow me yeah that'd be I don't know anyone's number I know

my mom yeah well fuck today if you lose your fucking little cell phone you're fucked you don't know anybody's number I don't know my house number and I had to learn it yeah because you never fucking know there's an earthquake the fucking towers go down the Iranian shoot the fucking tower down and here was your fucking iPhone ain't gonna work what's gonna give you no yeah who gots so you gotta learn how to get back on a fucking payphone and call and we're not gonna be able to oh yeah you can get the numbers off your fucking cell phone whatever what if you're fucking power die so be prepared that's what I'm

talking about you have a I'm fucking prepared now I've been prepared you know I have a charger and everything well I get like in a special place like my mom yeah you have to be fucking prepared do you for her earthquake hit like a backpack filled with stuff when I moved here my mom refurb papers lighters no fucking edibles all my mom all my mom wanted was water and money she told me cash in case credit cards don't work yeah you have the little cash hitting around I've been telling people that for fucking years what if they shoot the electrical systems how we're gonna get money out of fucking bank you're not I

have no cash ever no you're the worst I've noticed that you walk around with fucking you know a dollar Bill and then a dollar Jesus fucking George Washington eyes are sealed fucking tight you don't even know what the fuck's going on what else Lee talk to me tell me fucking something's going on nothing no nothing just it's interesting some pounds but then what yeah when you were saying you're being embarrassed the thing that and I said it in one of my first videos the thing that got me started on the first juice fast was I was embarrassed because I noticed that the drive-thru people started remembering me and even

before that I would map it out so let's say I'm Tuesday went to McDonald's I wouldn't go back there for a few days so they wouldn't know like it's like it's like people who go have multiple drug dealers I missed it about four fucking months huh yeah I haven't been in the box now I haven't I've been good about that but and like I would even like when I lived at home when I wasn't this big but I would I wouldn't order from the same delivery places too often because I was I was embarrassed about it so it's a can you and you went through it too I mean did you did you do it or you did at that point you didn't care and you went

to the same place what the cocaine I did it that means we were addicted to I had three dealers and I didn't want them to know what I was doing and I would have three dealers and I would alternate I would go see two of them every day okay but two different ones so they would go what happened to you last night so I would go to El compadre I had D money the black guy and I had white guy Mike the dirty guy and I had the Mexican on Western Sunset so I had four guys so sometimes I wouldn't call Mike and I take the car I'd straighten up and drive to fucking Sunset Western and the Mexican would come running down

the street looking for me when he'd fall out of a fucking tree yeah so that was I didn't want everybody to know some nights I started my nights at D Sleazy's house and some nights I started my nights in El compadre some nights I go to D Sleazy and then get the second package from El compadre and go home because there were two blocks away from each other okay some nights I go to D Sleazy and I'd wait for late night Mike late night Mike yeah cuz I called him after midnight after two you know three o'clock and then I had the black dude Sergio love I also had him he had terrible coke but he front me so you

gotta do what they do yeah it works and every once I get over and he had two tubes instead of one I clip the one so I'd get double the high that's like one of McDonald's after midnight they're probably stale and fucking gross six years now I haven't snored and it's and it's people ask me at least one some month do you miss and I tell you yeah I missed a one part of it but I really don't yeah I love sleeping I love being focused on what I'm doing you know like I've said before when you're addicted to anything you know food whatever you can't have a normal life because you're always thinking about it oh yeah even

if you had a child and a wife right now in between driving around you figure out how to go get your little fix without them knowing that's do you think if you didn't have your kid you would have gone back to it at some point no no I'm never going back to it whatsoever I got off to I don't even go in that realm I don't even let my mind go in that realm I got pills at the house that I looked at the other I cleaned out my medicine my medicine yeah when I start the ear infection back again I fucking cleaned it out it's amazing the shit I found that I found Viking from the surgery I found Viking from the root

canal one time how I don't like those things it's amazing how but I'm 50 who gives up it's like when somebody comes up to you says I'm cleaning so but you you want me to jump up and fucking down for you cuz you're cleaning sober you shouldn't have fucking started this shit in the first yes you follow you ever get those people it's my birthday today I'm cleaning sober eight you I'm supposed to tap you in the back bitch it's even worse unlike the entertainment shows or whatever yeah I was the part supposed to start doing drugs not supposed to you know I was looking at Iron Man yeah I was looking at him the other day and I'm

like man ten years ago that guy was snorting up a fucking storm like I'd like to sit I heard he still goes to meetings I give him my heart man a lot of people and when you're at that level of the snort that's the crazy thing so there's the level where you get up in the morning you go to work and you get a bump with your friends but it grows the addiction always grows then it gets to this level where it's a fucking freak show in your mind it's a freak show what do you mean by freak show it becomes this fucking sex filled freak show or fucking disgust and you know just craziness that you know because it's

like a gun when you have a gun it's like having a magnet for trouble yeah when I carry the gun I always got pulled all by people cursing at me and give me the finger there was always that potential for me to shoot something but I threw the fucking gun away I got no problem you know and that cocaine people attracted like I was looking at Sissy you know my cat Sissy yeah the black and white when Sissy's a fucking sweet yeah she's cute let me tell you something about Sissy when I was doing coke Sissy had no contact with me really what so ever I have a scratch on the bottom of my arm that covers my tricep that was Sissy when I

picked her up one day her hind leg ripped my fucking arm she loves you now she like you know why because let me tell you something why because that cocaine was putting something in my system if the energy of that coke was making that cat she was very sensitive to it I'm telling you it's like bad and she stopped she wouldn't even come close she didn't I think she was the third cat to come into the house yeah probably 2002 we didn't fucking talk so 2006 we lived in the same house and she would walk around me wow that's how strong that cat was now last night there was one part was watching the Anderson Silver from all

angles on Spike last night when I got home uh-huh just to end the fucking night and I sat down and I had you know super bad on my thigh I had fucking Harry on my legs which they're like the McCoy's in the hot fields they hate each other yeah and I was laying on Sissy and I looked at her at one point and she just went man like a little meow and she went like that to kiss me uh-huh and I said to myself if anybody saw Sissy seven years ago and me it was like she'd walk around me she'd fucking walk around me and give me like a look that's how much of a girl she's Sissy's out of all my females Sissy is the girl girl girl

you're the house she's never been dirty you know she's really dainty yeah she walks light she's always clean always clean you know everything about her is shiny she's healthy but you know she didn't fucking talk to me now she actually kisses me in the lips if I go like that she'll pop you know when I when I pick her up she purrs up a fucking storm talking with talking which I got up before 30 the fucking morning right yeah I got before 30 I see there's no light on the room right I see there's nothing on the room I'm like oh my wife is not that means the baby walk around right I look over they

got the electables on what is it the interjectibles whatever that Disney movie with the guy with the big fucking head the one of all the incredible creditables on right my wife is like awake like she's not even look at her I seal a baby like look at the Incredibles and I walk over into a swing and I look at her and she got a pacifier in the mountain she sees me with her eyes is just goes my wife goes and I can hear my wife just yell not yell I could just hear a voice going get the fuck out of there so I went in the kitchen like nothing happens she came up after me that has pulled she goes that kid's been

up to three in the morning that little motherfucker and he walked out and standing her fucking way and shit she's just about to fall asleep she saw me and she just went yeah like fuck yeah music cuz he's like at the music on she fucking my wife and I could hear like a little tone like it was like a dog whistle yeah yeah that little tentative good the fuck so I knew she was tortured my fucking wife before 30 when I was leaving at 5 30 they were they were passed out she was on the swing no Jesus and some was under my wife was passed the fuck out with Demi me I went out of so she can't win she's already getting that

from you giving your your wife's in for some fun in a couple years with you and her she's just you're mercy is gonna be like your little mercy was tortured as small as I could see that mercy is fucking torturing this but that that that's really the thing I mean that's good that you realize see you had your little addiction to food you were thinking that they would know no and that was your freak and they didn't know how your mind works doesn't yeah this is the beauty of addiction that you when you quit something like that you get so much stronger now now you it's money ball now you see behind what you were thinking

about when you see somebody else struggling with it you know exactly what they're struggling with mm-hmm addictions a motherfucker you know and it's so weird that I you know you said something to me that really you felt it you were fucking around I asked you you ate at McDonald's and you go you were really upset for a minute weren't you oh yeah I know that how much you like that stuff oh yeah I know that and listen you're not the only one I mean you have nothing to feel bad no there's this middle that I don't have millions of stores for no reason it could be fucking it's amazing how many make I went to

McDonald's for breakfast yesterday my wife had the egg white cheddar was I good you know we were in a rush yesterday morning the fucking baby shit everywhere so she couldn't make breakfast I go let's just go to Mickey D's you like McDonald my wife likes it yeah she likes the egg McMuffin with the hash brown I'm not into you just can't go six days a week no I don't like the potato I do like the apple pie I could eat an apple pie and I could listen to I can't lie to you there's some shit motherfuckers crave every fucking day yeah okay whether it's good or bad for you you know McDonald's cigarettes cocaine

alcohol these are all the things society tells you they're bad they're fucking bad now you know and when you were a kid you were eight McDonald's you know why you eat McDonald's a because it's cheap yeah and B because you're on a move yeah America's on a move when you got two fucking kids and you're living on a budget and your husband and you both work you're on a fucking move 15 minutes goes bad you go to a you pick up a child at a fucking piano class or boom you fucking you can't cook you're not gonna make time now the thing about raising children is a schedule you know I was never put on a fucking schedule my

schedule was live you know but normal fucking American kids got put on a fucking schedule you know I didn't take a nap till 1995 really I dated a stripper and she told me I'd take a nap in the afternoon makes you stronger so for an hour you know give her a stab in the afternoon I get all fucked up and then I take a little nap for an hour I never napped you're supposed to fucking take a nap in other countries they nap you so but you're supposed to put your kid down for a fucking nap yeah let's play this motherfucker what's going on here today was the music was the reefer it's Wednesday cocksuckers get out there

do you do any jumping jack story no I'll do some I'll do someone music oh shit a little too short here fuck it up what Wednesday May 15th half-time oh shit oh shit get up we're gonna fuck with you let me see you have a wiggle for a while let me see what oh shit oh shit oh shit one more drink we got a smoke three more oh shit can't hang with the big dogs stay on the fucking porch cocksuckers blow the whistle oh shit I'm not supposed to but I love that opening scene of office space is

totally me this ain't rap this is motherfucking too short I don't even know about too short I got locked up and the brothers one name when you listen there's a couple things that kill brothers all right Popeyes chicken red lobster and too short and and two live fucking crew makes fucking black people go crazy really oh what's that song a big booty hose or whatever big booty I don't like that shit like all the other fucking stuff let me tell you something you know why well everything's going good nothing I drink a lot of water my wife got that key lips whatever the company that puts the fucking water in

your house mm-hmm every time a month I like drinking the fucking water you know and these are little things you could do just to help yourself nothing I told you a thousand fucking times thousand times I've told you go to honor calm just check out what they got I'm not talking about the battle ropes I'm not talking about all that stuff you could run you could do jumping jacks like Lee you could swim you could do a thousand things when you're ready for the fucking kettlebells you get the video and learn let's get the mechanisms going let's get the mental going you know the alpha brain always fucking helps I'm on like

nineteen alpha brains today my solicitors my sinister synapses no not synapses I'm not writing no paper my cylinders cylinders is the word I'm looking for I'm on fire they're tapping they're fucking making it synapses it's not synapses what synapses it's the brain things listen don't make me stab you with this fucking smoking cigarette over here all right cut second no my cylinders are on fire today try this alpha brain I don't know if they have a sample pack try some alpha brain do the three package get some new mood that'll put you in a better fucking mood cocksucker and get yourself a little

immune see the cold went when the colds go to flu and fucking ammonia's I got a cold now I sneeze for three days and it's fucking moves on the sleep the water the immune the sport tech you were who's better than fucking you let's say you gotta send extra dough let's say you and the chick broke up fuck it you're looking for better avenues you want that sperm in good shape get the hemp chocolate fucking protein or get some of these today my man's gonna call him we're gonna talk about the fucking alpha brain the new 180 and get the hemp force check this out these fucking hemp force chocolate bars the vanilla top

chai chai chai thank you sir right away you gotta be a fucking English teacher they're tremendous take these motherfuckers I eat one the other day before the plane use that gotta eat before you're on the plane and I get dizzy and shit like that fucking eight one beautiful went through security like a soldier are you fucking kidding me or what let me give you cocksucker some shout-outs today to get this party started right by the way I gotta talk to you my son because you know me I pick up the bed the bed I don't pick up the fucking baby I come back home about ten to four wanna leaves I have the baby I

watch TV with the baby sometimes SpongeBob sometimes whatever some of the children sometimes I watched the Incredibles or the other movie she's gotten there you know what's been on foot well you know a movie's been on the last two motherfucking days and around the last three days in a row in the afternoon what man on fire oh shit and I gotta tell you something holy shit people always ask me no Joey give a review of this give a review of that I can't talk too much about fucking man on fire I can't every time I watch it I see something else and I go what the fuck was that yesterday it opened up from

when he put the guy at the bomb up the guy's ass I love that scene and he had him and that's what it opened up with I'm sitting there with my daughter going honey SpongeBob is on sabbatical we're watching fucking Denzel she was happy as shit she looked at me like let's watch it fucking started watching that he is so bad in that movie yeah and he goes to the Puerto Ricans house he shoots himself yeah then from there he goes to fucking the guy's house and he calls the guy and he shoots the guy in the arm which is a great scene yeah let me hold on one second bam you know you want your body my life for your life yeah

they were talking about the same that John I said but you know that when you're honest you won't have a lot of friends but you have the friends that you fucking need yeah let me tell you something man I'm watching this fucking movie and you don't know how many people have come up to me said Joey I like man on fire I just don't like to be traded himself in why not girl at the end he gave his word do you know what your fucking word is it's your fucking word remember and there's one see I don't give a fuck what you're doing today when you get home at five o'clock you put our man on fire you fast forward that's

that last fucking scene that last scene every year like when you walk into an acting class that's the scene you should watch that's the scene listen you want to get good at acting you're an actor you don't know you want to waste your time going to see these fucking momos or the fucking failed actors in Hollywood they did three movies and they realized it's hard work I go teach it they get all these saps I'm telling you guys you don't need this shit this is what you fucking do lesson number one just watch the Godfather watch that fucking movie over it over and over again watch Marlon Brando particular scenes watch the

first fucking scene what I think my doorbell run go ahead keep going watch the first fucking scene with the camera that could be the cops watch the second scene with the with what the fuck the name of it the first scene with the beginning of the fucking movie the second scene is when they're up when the kill Michael gets shot or sonny gets shot he comes downstairs to see Duvall watch that scene watch when he takes the cup Duvall's hair watch when he does all this shit all these little scenes are what will teach you you sit there and go what did I just watch that's how good fucking the Godfather's then after you

watch that movie maybe three thousand times maybe three thousand times then you put on Denzel Washington man on fire and you watch the last scene when he calls and she said he says your life for the kids life and he thinks about it was I'll be there with your brother you know he goes yeah bring my brother but it's your life for the children's life you understand yeah because I understand and then he calls the wife and he tells her that he doesn't know pick up the Peter might be fucking alive then he walk he gets there and he walks up that hill with a bad-ass Rugger League fucking sheriff Harlem the Rugger League

fucking a lot of people don't know about it now you fucking know and he walks up the thing when they take around they cut a blindfold off that's when the party starts in his head it starts in his head you see him he puts his head down and as she runs to him he just breeds yeah he's getting an anxiety attack this is a fucking actor living this out and you're watching this going what the fuck is Denzel doing and also he takes her she says to him what are we gonna do whatever he goes you're going home he goes what are you gonna do he goes going home to blue by you remember yeah and he goes look what I have for you and he

gives them the book yeah I figured out the last number and something happens I forget what the conversation was it doesn't matter watch that fucking scene yeah then he cuts the brother the brother walks his little hump in his arm because he shoots him in the fucking arm he gets Peter that music starts and also no one up I love the team they like you're like what the fuck and you see him in the no he puts his hand up and they show the red dot yeah yeah that's it they don't say a word they just show the red dot in the head now this guy could have pulled the fucking string and blew himself up like a fucking Arab but

he didn't you know why cuz he's Denzel motherfucking yeah and a spoiler but if you haven't seen it after ten years relax when you haven't seen man on fire do me a favor walk up to your roof and jump I when I first saw it I couldn't handle I couldn't have handled it if I didn't think when he closed his eyes in the car that that was the end I don't think they killed him I don't think I'd be able to to go on if I thought that what you think it took him to a balloon party no I think he died when his eyes close right at the end I don't think he I think that's plenty that's fucking beautiful isn't talking about this is

why I fucking hang out with this Julie's a bad not only is a great producer he's a bad motherfucker you're right he probably died inside because that's what he told he goes I'm going home yeah and she goes home where and he goes blew by you remember cuz he kept listening to that blender run fuck fucking tremendous tremendous here we go oh shit there's my little brother Joey what's happening what's up buddy sitting here talking about on the drop of some knowledge about fucking man on fire what's going on in your world beautiful not too much Joey just putting the honor products to use early in the

morning had a little business dinner last night had a few drinks went out a little bit on a Tuesday night like a boss like you used to talk about savage to wake up here on a Wednesday and drink the 180 a little bulletproof coffee I'm ready to rock and roll baby now you drink the 180 first we do the coffee and then the 180 yep yep I drink the 180 first to rehydrate after the night and then the coffee and you mix the 180 with the water yeah when you talk about the water that's it the more water the more water you can drink comfortably in your stomach the better it's going to be for you because hydration is going to be a

key anytime you're in any stressful situation like you know too much to drink jet lag anything like that it's all very dehydrating so more water you can mix it with better after you're gonna be now let me let me ask you something I remember you know I travel every week this how stupid I am you ready for this what is the true definition of jet lag you know when you're flying there's a couple things that are happening it's there is no real definition it's like a feeling of malaise that you get after flying now why do you get that well one you're going way up in altitude in a pressurized cabin so that's throwing the

body off of it anyway there's things are happening you know at that level that height basically you're in a metal metal can that's really close to the sun so there's some solar radiation effects that people feel there's just the natural dehydration from that kind of level and then there's just the annoyance of the whole plane flight itself but a lot of it has to do with the altitude and the pressurizing of the cabin you know for example if you take a helicopter lower flying plane you're not going to feel the same effects that you will in one of those really high altitude commercial 737 jets and a lot of it have to do with

the altitude that you're at and and also breathing in the stale air it all just kind of combines to give you that feeling that people loosely termed in jet lag Jesus I fucking feel like shit when I fly especially those wrong ones and you know I prepare myself like in the old days you do an A ball you drink and then you get on a fucking plane you deserve what the fuck you get but now it's like stretching them water before you're gonna play a drink a lot of water the night before while I'm on a plane the last two years I don't even touch water I don't touch soda nothing just water that's it because it's just so no

no I'm happy that you put not a problem I mean let me tell you something from when we first had our first conversation a few years to go till now Aubrey you're doing some great things over that on it I mean you're fucking competing now you're ready to go you're like they're too short you gotta blow the whistle baby 16 albums with me on the cover yeah fucking tremendous now now what are the new products do you have I try have the the hem force bars here which I love I was telling leave I had one before man before I fly I'm always fucking starving I don't trust the food at the airport no more and I'm sick of the food

on a plane so from Austin I ate the chai bar that morning just to talk about it just see how I felt you know what man I made it on the plane I had the cheese and crackers with the grapes wasn't that bad but it helped me through security my blood sugar didn't go down so I really appreciate it was great it was great I've been eating them now on the rush in the mornings you know in the month that was my thing this is what I love you it's very hard to eat beyond a person on the run and to eat healthy these things at least you're halfway there yeah absolutely well you know most of the bars that you eat they have that element

in them that's that real kind of chalky protein powder kind of taste and feel and you know we wanted to ditch that we've been talking with Michael chair course I know he's good friend ears as well and really the key for us is to put as much actual food in a bar like that as we can so you look go down the ingredients and it's a lot of nuts grains you know hemp protein things that are really you know hemp seeds things that are really actual foods so and you just kind of mash them together and push them into a bar and you're actually eating what feels to the body like food and what you know absorbs into your system like a food rather

than a you know supplement of sorts you know a protein supplement it's actually like a small snack slash meal and you feel the difference when you're doing it that way versus trying to you know pack 38 grams of whey protein in a giant curd looking log bar you know which is what most of the bars that are out are like no I do say they have a lot of sugar and whatnot and I've never really been you know 20 years ago what was the big brand they're still around for the peanut butter chocolate that power bar yeah they were around 20 years ago and you look you know you know that your body when you're trying to build muscle when you're

trying to assemble you know your body only assimilates 30 grams of protein per meal so you want to you know really get up then you look at it it's got seven grams of protein in it you're like what the fuck is this I put this out like 15 now you can get bars with you know 92 grams of protein in it but what good is you know what good it's called sugar any not gonna do not gonna be any good no good at all yeah no good at all no no the power bars are power bars are just loaded with sugar and you know that's not gonna really do your body any good especially the type of sugar that they're using they're not using any kind

of earth-grown nutrient sugar it's a lot of process crap that you're gonna find in those and then the same thing in those you know like you said those double iron eagle stack 90 gram protein bars you know all that is just bottom of the barrel whey protein you know and whey protein has its place it's really difficult to digest for most people though and it's just your body's not going to do anything with all that protein you know better to get you know 10 to 15 grams of really solid usable protein with a very absorbable you know can nature like we have in the hemp then just kind of stack your body with as

much protein as possible I mean I think Dolce is really proven with his athletes that you know the way to do it is to do it as nature intended you know eat your protein like you would I mean there's no way other than killing you know a buffalo and eating the heart fresh as it's still beating and you're gonna get you know 40 grams of protein in a single serving it's just not the way not the way our body is designed to eat food I remember years ago that with these two bodybuilders called a barbarian brothers you're too young for them they used to they claimed the fame was I mean these guys were all roared it out but they

claimed the fame is that they both ate 36 eggs a fucking day who the fuck it's 36 eggs a day I can't even smell you yeah yeah the reason you wouldn't want to be going to sleep in bed with them no do you remember who they were do you remember who they were at all no they were like you know they did a few movies you know Hollywood I mean they were twins and they were all roared it up you know America didn't know about fucking Deccan the rebalon back in the 80s like this these two these two motherfuckers are going to Mexico on a daily and sneaking them in eggs or some shit I gotta tell the reason why I called you are be a lot

of people were very excited about the 180 I am too honestly you know I mean really I used to when people used to ask me hey I'll be what should I do for hangover what should I do for jet lag I said well yeah here's the recipe you're gonna want two alpha brain three shrimp tech you know if it was a guy two alpha brain three shrimp tech one new mood and one shrimp tech immune you're gonna take those with a tall glass of water and so that was my recipe and but you know not everybody has that and it's kind of annoying to kind of piece all those out and it's a lot of pills to take right off the bat when you already feel like shit

anyways so what I wanted to do was put that all in a drink mix to make it super simple you know because each one of those elements has important things the alpha brain can help support your neuro transmitters the shrimp tech sport has the adaptogen adaptogen the key because they help your body adapt to stress so like the Siberian ginseng rodeola you know alpha poke acid these different things as well as being natural free radicals themselves so that's an important part of the shrimp tech and then the new mood you know you want to kick up your five HDP because you probably didn't sleep great and then you're probably a

little on edge as far as the mood then you want to get from the shrimp tech immune you want to get some zinc and some of the other minerals that we have in there as well as some broad spectrum vitamin D's and D's and magnesium and then I added a few other key things as well some sodium bicarbonate which is good to rehydrate the muscles and then potassium iodide which protects your thyroid particularly from you know solar radiation like you might get on a flight but just generally healthy for your your thyroid and providing you with potassium which you need anyways and then a couple other key any antioxidants like

great seed extracts and blood sugar regulators and you know put it all together so that it's just a master concoction you know it is the the cocktail so to speak that I would recommend for that purpose and you know certainly I used to have more practice with it in my younger days but still every now and then I'm able to put my formula to use like today and and honestly it makes a huge difference whether I'm flying and I'm gonna take one you know kind of before I fly and after I fly and you know I would never know that I even hopped on a plane or like this morning where the turnaround from when I first woke up and

went oh shit you know what did I do last night that was crazy and then to feeling like now you know full 180 in and the bulletproof coffee I'm feeling pretty good it's not perfect not magic but it's gonna get you the best advantage that you can get I get so many positive feedback stuff on honor products from the strong bone to the hip protein you know people email me I answer anywhere from 80 to 125 emails every Sunday and you know I got to get 10 to 15 you know emails of people thanking me or or the strong bone or they asked me the questions I asked you you know my knee hurts I need surgery if I take strong bone well do I still need

the surgery shit like that you know and another reason why I want to talk to you is because it's 2013 you know the success of the UFC part of it is that we know who Dana White is when I drink a Coca-Cola I don't know who fucking Mr. Coca-Cola is when I go to Adidas I never met Johnny fucking Adidas have you it's 2013 and I've always told you know I'll be when I go until you don't know how many times I go into a vitamin store a GNC or something I go in there and I'll be you know me from the beginning I go in there with four or five hundred dollars looking to get healthy and not one fucking person comes up to me or not

one person is fucking knowledgeable and I don't blame them because that companies probably paying them three fucking dollars an hour I wouldn't read a fucking brochure either but at the same time you know when I talk to you you're very knowledgeable about this stuff and I've always told people in the future you want your business to succeed it's all gonna be through customer service because we all pretty much I make you laugh and so is the other comedian if I answer your emails if I sell products you know and this is with you I've always asked you questions and you've been right there for me you're

the president of this you're the CEO you're out there you're trying new things you know when we talk you talk to me about the jungles of fucking Saigon and Bolivia you've gone to the hell of the world to get products what's in the future for on that what do you see you yeah Joey you know I mean this is you know really this I appreciate everything you're saying and for me it's the easiest thing in the world because I fucking love it man I mean I'm really just living the absolute dream of my life you know everything that I've seen for myself I didn't necessarily know exactly how this would manifest but I would stay awake

you know night after night knowing that this is what was missing this is what I wanted for my life and finally I was able to visualize it and put it in the practice so you know doing all these things that you mentioned talking to a customer talking to you man it's just a dream for me you know I'm really could not be a happier human being and you know when you're that happy about what you do you know there is no separation between I got work or you know you're spending so much time working the whole thing is just living my life to the best and doing exactly what I would want to do you know so so that's what makes it so

easy and such a powerful thing and you know I'm really just trying to find the best shit that I can and I'm gonna continue to keep doing that you know experimenting with as much stuff as possible and you know trying to improve on every single thing that's out there in the market you know I mean I think on its philosophy is we went out you know initially and partnered with some other key brands like Vega and Nordic Naturals and some other exemplary companies who are doing things really well but because we couldn't figure out exactly how to do things better but now we're starting to get even better and I'm finding new

kind of key ingredients I got a new hemp force vanilla prototypes that I just got in that's really you know that was a tough one right because the hemp force chocolate is so delicious a big standard to live by and I found a really kind of exotic ingredient out of South America that will you know act as the cocoa does in the in the chocolate formula and so you know found that kind of magic bullet and then in the we're making a new green powder because the green powder you know green vibrance is great but it kind of tastes like horse stables and like you're chewing on an alfalfa long it's a little tough to taste and tough to take

but you know you need those extra green so I was trying to figure out how I could make one that had all the nutrients but still had a taste that was reasonable I found another ingredient you know I won't probably talk about my secret ingredients but it's all about just really hammering and finding every different source you can't you know I go to all these shows and there'll be a whole table of different new ingredients new foods new different things to come out and I'll just pick up samples and try it and be my own little scientist and try and figure that out and then you know on the supplement side it's a lot

about the current research you know what research is coming out what new extracts or plant extracts are available and just trying to stay on the cutting edge and meet as many needs as possible and you know like we say you know we're all about total human optimization trying to make everybody give them the tools to live an optimal life to be as healthy as strong as sharp as they possibly can and you know that's never gonna stop you know I'm getting sharper and sharper from these alpha brains you know me though I took two alpha brains I smoke a joint I'm ready for the fucking day Jack you ready some pussy

alpha brain will focus your shit motherfuckers you'll be eating pussy you'll be I'm telling you tell these motherfucking Arby I love you with all my heart and I'm proud of you for what you've done me you know when I went down to your offices and you took me down and I found out you were a who-player and you went to Virginia I mean you're the fucking real deal man you blow my fucking mind if I had a son if I had a son I want him to be you you bad motherfucking that's it I'm just happy you called you made my morning this and I hope these guys anywhere they can email you or find you or all my all

my social media is a great way to get in touch with me Twitter at warrior poet us I got a Facebook page Facebook comm slash warrior poet us that's really the best way to get hold of me personally but you know any question you have about on it we got an awesome in-house customer service team this is not some outsourcing to some random place where nobody gives a shit you know every person on a customer service team is an awesome human being so any questions you have about on it just feel comfortable asking them and then if you want to get a hold of me yeah at warrior poet us or Facebook comm slash warrior poet us and

I will get you back personally and let's get this on it fucking the cruise ship going pretty soon so we can all eat out for brains and sail some way on a fucking cruise ship you know I'm saying yeah yeah let's do it I've been talking to Joe about that we definitely want to yeah let's do it one floor is the fucking the ball and don't forget about that thing we talked about the sketch keep me posted I will absolutely Joey look forward to it all right I love you man thank you have a great day the bottom of my heart man bye bye bye this is Italy you know you got no fucking excuses no more cocksuck you don't I want you to

take an outfit let me tell you something you pop 19 of these I won't be able to take you out of that pool you'll be fucking up a man let me give some shout out to this motherfucker I hope you people learn some first of all our first fucking sponsors a little fighter by the name of Adrian more out of Colorado I'm gonna send him some honest stuff I got honest to send some stuff we're gonna sponsor he's gonna have the church what's happened now in his fucking shorts I'm cool you're making progress in your life we got Steve farb we got Zack D no Millie cocksucker we got Cayman I gotta we got Jason Rothman mr. Piper and

Mikey Joseph O'Connor I love you motherfuckers that's right go to honest.com press in church in the box take a look at the fucking hip pop bar the protein bar make sure you get this 180 I tell you what I'm taking this fucking time out of six-hour flight back and forth 12 hours in the plane you bet your ass I'll be taking three of those I'll be taking with Dolores Brownie I'll be getting get up for fucking six-hour flight and business class I hope I get bumped up Lee I put it for an upgrade I gotta get a bump up they're gonna start passing your picture around American I'm not even flying on American fact I'm

supposed to check in five fucking minutes Lee you gotta check me in you gotta figure out how to do it so I get my shit that's right I want to give a shout out to dead squatters all over the motherfucking country put it together you know that's it that's all I got for you motherfuckers were you this weekend where am I I'm a governor's in Belmont no New York on Friday and I've been Long Island on Saturday and Leviton oh that's cool you know I don't fuck around and then next week the 29th not next week we're at the ice house for a live fucking podcast but on the 28th testicle Testament 5 comes out pre-order

that motherfucker today bitches boom I got another call coming in did I tell you about that yeah I got my man Steve Marco from American top team calling until we're gonna give you guys a fun-filled fucking hour you say no fucking Michael Jackson and this is not thriller bitches I've got to take these glasses off I gotta go to that this today they're gonna clean my teeth fill the gavel cavities fill the fucking sides where it's exposed my teeth the fucking purple yeah so they're gonna clean my teeth I got to go get a shot today gotta get my driver's license today you're gonna driver's license yeah I'm gonna go get a duplicate

I lost my I gotta go to Hollywood two fucking 45 this white Hollywood because they couldn't get an appointment for me in Glendale we got above all you did you did the appointment okay that's good who do you fucking I mean who the fuck do you think you're dealing with some novice you were walking to Hollywood just off the tip of your head like you were driving go oh I gotta go in the Hollywood I gotta get something that is the jungle of drive I mean driving for what's the name of the place DMP there always a fucking nightmare and there's never a drug dealer they're selling coke that's where you living selling coke at

a fucking drug dealer yeah no I and it takes a couple weeks but I love it I'd went in and you get out in two minutes yeah that's it I'm gonna go to Glendale but Glendale don't have an appointment so my wife thought I wanted to make an appointment before the flight to New York I don't want to be I got my idea I'm ready if I can go oh shit oh shit you could try using your weed ID at TSA I gave it to him a bird bank by mistake you see motherfuckers don't think I'm lying I'm not lying to you because by mistake this is what happened I put my weed thing in the middle with my license so when I pull it out you see how it

comes out together that's my weed license so the one day it was in this in Burbank thank God it was Burbank and the guy has a sense of humor and I gave it to him he's in the physician statement he's like what the fuck organic for verification he goes what's this I don't know just take the fucking license keep looking mind you I'm so stoned I have no idea what I'm handing you I'm telling you when I fly I get fucking baked to the gazelles not before cuz I feel bad all my mind I think I get baked before I take a shit that's the point in my life and the disgusting and the times when you're not baked you're still a little

baked but you know what's crazy I don't get like this days I won't get baked all fucking day not even a little bit like I'll get baked in the morning with you but I'll go home now and I got the kid I can't get baked I don't want to be higher on my fucking child yeah I was thinking that you don't do that around her no no no I won't put it in the car either if I'm high no no no no no no no no no no no I'm by the book I gotta in fact listen to this right yesterday my wife said the fondest fucking thing what you said I'm sitting there I'm trying to watch Diane Sawyer you know me though you love Diane I love Diane Sawyer I just watch it I

don't master man I just watch it says a cute little fucking haircut I'm sitting there and my wife says something to me about what the fuck is this today my wife says something to me about that she goes you know next week since you're home we gotta clean the room I go my bedroom I go no no no problem I got a really fucking clean out I go have you smelled in there lately I go between the cat piss the fucking feet it smells like sweat it smells like feet it smells like sleep apnea and she goes and pot she doesn't call it marijuana she says smells like pot in there I go what do you mean pot she goes from now on you got

a smoke outside why do smoke outside she goes yeah I walked in there yesterday and sometimes I forget I just take like a head off and fucking joint and I realize what I'm doing you know I can't get fucking in the bedroom she gets pissed she goes and pot that was the funniest fucking thing I had heard I kept laughing right in the fucking face it smells like pot in there fucking pot there smells like fucking good shit you know I don't like good shit what are you gonna do you know you always listen I don't do anything else it's not like when people ask me like this kid who came this weekend he kept asking me the

phone like what do you do up there what do you do up there what do you do up there I'm the only job a fucking comedian I love living in my fucking head yeah I want to beat every I'm trying to write every day I gotta write something and I can't come up with what the fucking right I'm trying and I do my best work when I'm stony edible you know I call you and talk about the farts in the face and I can tell cuz you're good well usually you're like lively sometimes like especially at night I'll you'll call me like what's up dog like it's like you like you're an NPR host you're just really quiet yeah I love it six dirty

my balls are spinning like one of those machines at Las Vegas I fucking love it now why you ever been to Utah no I've been to Utah to ski like 20 fucking years ago 30 years ago I didn't talk to nobody then you know I gotta go to West wise guys and Salt Lake say I don't know what to expect I heard that I mean other comedians have said it's cool off it everybody Felipe everybody says it's cool as fucking shit how are they with weed though I can't bring no fucking weed to Utah yeah I guarantee that gross that there's a lot of non-mormons in Utah right yeah probably I heard moments are cool people I get like the

thing I've noticed is some of those people they can be pushy but a lot of the like the religious people are like nice and cool but if you start if you get them talking about the the weird stuff then it gets weird but I've heard the Mormons are really nice you ever meet one I don't think so no see I you do triple runs when you do these roads and Idaho and Montana there's little hotels that you really can't curse because there's the Mormons okay so I know I think I met them you know I don't know if they have 19 wives and all that shit I really don't know what it means I know there's a show now where

they're opening up on biography one I was discovering I meant to watch it you know I read up on it a while ago but I didn't really get the whole fucking thing I know it's bring them young and Steve he's not a bad fucking guy if you really gotta think about it yeah no are you raising your daughter religious at all well here's the fucking deal the deal is plain and simple I'm getting a baptized because you need to do that so if she dies you don't go to fucking limbo after that it's on her my wife is part of religion I'm part of religion listen when it comes to religion there's two things you don't really want to talk

about sometimes a religion in politics yeah I just told you you know I was fucking raised you know when I came to this country my mother was Catholic you know I was raised Catholic I was really raised Catholic because of punishing the Catholic schools and everything and it stuck with me and it's helped me and it helped molded me could I live without it yeah I had no belief for it after my mother died I believed in no religion I believed in religion was you know being a fucking bad person I didn't know now I have a different way of religion I feel it's like a it's like an outline mm-hmm you don't really need it but you need it

you know and this is just me talking here I don't want people fucking hate me for this or whatever this is what works for me you know I also get high oh we gonna look for the fucking morning oh shit oh shit it's my little it's my little brother Steve Mako how are you sir how's it going how's it going with you how's Florida treating you how's a jersey boy adjusting to Florida I'm adjusting good yeah it's been pretty good just how long have you been down there for Steve about nine months and do you miss Jersey at all yeah yeah man I you know I miss Jersey you know I don't get back as much but I was living a

Pennsylvania so I spent you know a lot of time going back and forth before I moved down but yeah no I'm gonna sit it's it's good down here enough you like it you can deal with the humidity in the Puerto Ricans yeah well you grew up around all those fucking specks so you're used to it and shit so you're alright yeah Steve Mako let me tell you something I was looking at your pictures online and there's only one way to fucking describe you you're a savage I talk about being a savage but you're the last of a real fucking savage you look like something on Game of Thrones stabbing people and shit I love you to death you know it's

funny Steve Mako a great great friend of mine told me about you 15 years ago his name was Darren Rago do you remember him at all do you remember the name what his name was Darren Rago yeah I mean it sounds familiar yeah yeah he was a North Bergen wrestler and we went out to breakfast and he said do you know who's a badass motherfucker Steve Mako and I'm like what are you talking about and I remember when you were born I was around the area and they were talking and I'm like he said he's wrestling he's how old is he and he was telling me about you know years later he died that's he was a wrestler from North Bergen that was

pretty badass he was friends with Crowley and the two Pascale brothers and all those guys D Lorenzo and he died so he was the first person that turned me out about you and then I thought about you from time to time and I didn't know and then I bumped into a guy King Moe yeah and then I spoke to King Moe about you and he was telling me yeah he might and then I started following you for the Olympics and and you just made me proud and when you walked into the West Palm Beach Improv that night I nearly shit my pants Steve you know that right yeah man that was that was awesome that was a good show and

everything it was good to probably see you down there you know but it was funny because I was talking about our area up there I didn't know you were in the audience I just knew that there's a lot of North Bergen people in that area there's a lot of people from Northern New Jersey in that area so I just wanted to make them feel at home and I was talking about taking my dick out at the fucking white guy not white castle but at the Dunkin Donuts there are nungusses you know little nungusses there and you came up to me after and I'm like I'm from North Bergen telling your wife I told you I told you he was from where I was

from so it was how's it going down there you fought last two weeks ago May 3rd right yeah yeah May 3rd I fought it was good it was a damn report so you're 3 and 0 now in MMA 2 and 0 2 and 0 Jesus Christ and both submissions yeah yeah so your jiu-jitsu was on but you know for your foot sweep yeah you're a fucking savage it's funny because I like to read your thing and talk about it with you but all I could talk to you about is just looking at you I could tell where you're from I could tell you from North Bergen for a while people don't know Steve Michaels originally from North Bergen where'd you go to high

school at I went to the St. Benedict's and I transferred to Blair it's like a prep school in Blair's town it's in New Jersey it's up in the mountains over there and you were everything in New Jersey you were Mr. fucking Lucha Libre in New Jersey yeah I never wrestled in the States I always wrestled in the but I was in props you know but you had not standing record in high school then you went you went over not you went to Iowa first yeah yeah I went to Iowa for two years wrestled for Jimmy Zuleski and then I transferred to Oklahoma State after the Olympic year in 2004 Jesus and they all thought you were gonna go to

Lehigh or something yeah yeah I was I was looking at Lehigh but but I wound up going to Oklahoma State you said fuck it I'm gonna stay right here in the Big Eight and fuck you motherfuckers up show you the bosses yeah yeah you know what the school I wanted to coach at Lehigh after college I mean it's a good it's a good school and everything but you know I wanted to go to Oklahoma you know it's a bigger bigger similar to Iowa I thought at the time you know what I mean you know what the Colorado yeah yeah I heard that I look at your documentary okay look at you you're a good man bro nice man it looked good the way you made

North Bergen look your family you do you know what I mean it was awesome did you see one of your closest buddies in that Carmine Balzano yeah yeah yeah I've seen it yeah it's cool it's amazing that you know like I said I grew up when your uncle was the mayor and he was very very good to me I never never forgot you know your family but I knew him all through Carmine that's how I met him all through you know I was part of the family down there I mean I was the first Cuban allowed in that house yeah and uh your family was very good I never forgot him you know and your uncle was just a savage up there in his little house on Kelly Boulevard look at the monsters that house is still there how come

we don't buy it Steve we gotta buy that motherfucking take it back that's a nice nice place right remember the one with the gates in front with the leaves and yeah I know right by Town Hall yeah yeah but I heard they moved Town Hall now oh they did that's what I heard yeah I had you know I go to I go back home now Steve and I drive I go to Chance Dragon in I go to Rudy's in Cliffside and I get the fuck out of that pretty much on Anderson Avenue yeah yeah yeah yeah with the fry calamar the squid that's my life yeah I can't eat it out here so I go to Rudy's and I go fucking crazy yeah you're uh and what what do you think what is your next fight August 16th and where are you fighting at in Las Vegas okay so we'll probably go out I'm gonna send

fucking Lee out there to flying Judah go out there with a with a shirt that says Steve Mako fuck this motherfucker up and then uh how many more fights you think before you see the octagon do you think you know right now I'm working on getting better you know I'm taking the fight by fight uh you know I'm just trying to improve the best I can and uh because you know I'm crossing over from wrestling I mean I'm so I'm just working on improving my game when the time comes the time comes you know good for you man are you down there with a in a good camp with some great people yeah yeah ATT is great man my coaches are real good coach lebo has been helping me a lot and uh great training partners you know and you got your boy who's fighting next week down there

you got the agate alvaz who's fighting who's this oh he's fighting Matt Brown that's a great fight yeah so yeah you guys will be busy down there yeah big foot fight then uh next weekend in Vegas for the title against the last one are you coming up yeah yeah I'll be there for that okay I'll definitely see you I'm coming up Saturday for the fight for sure I gotta work I love going to the weigh-in because that's where you see the whole thing go down but you're not the best I can you can't do both so I'm gonna go in for the fight so I'll be looking forward to seeing you Mike don't you'll be there so we'll make a little jersey reunion yeah let's get some pizza somewhere listen brother thank you very much for calling I gotta tell you something you make a lot of people

very proud and me one of them because uh where we came from we didn't have much like that near a Sabbaths yeah I appreciate it man thank you very much for calling me on the show thank you brother for calling Steve have a great weekend just give your wife a hug I will thanks like you got it brother yeah this fucking kid you have to go on uh yahoo and google and look at his pictures I look right now wrestling with a black fucking eye one eye is purple just amazing and I know the kid's story holy shit yeah he looks like a fucking wild man he looks like an American gladiator yeah no no no no no it's uh and he's not you know a muscle guy he's not and I gotta tell you something he's the spitting fucking image of his father Joe Marco really spitting image that's a huge black

eye it's the first one that comes up and it's Steve and it's MA CCO or oh no it's MO CCO sorry um and it's like half of his side of his face is like black that's fucking crazy it's a tough kid and it's amazing how oh he's a big guy I could never be a fighter I'm a fucking pussy I get hit in the fucking head I see blood I'm gonna faint even if I'm winning but when I look at his wrestling pictures I think a lot of my life look at his face when he's I think of my life because you know I don't have much it's not like I'm a good looking guy in comedy I'm no Anthony Jeslinick you know I'm not a witty guy enough and but I've worked hard you could tell the work in my fucking face and and I see that you know you can't stop this kid you don't have to put a

fucking bullet in his fucking head to stop him yeah gotta put a bullet in his fucking head for some reason I imagine him as like a lighter guy but now this guy's probably like light heavyweight yeah yeah he's a heavyweight he's gonna be a heavyweight you know he's he they brought him in to mimic uh Cain Velazquez for Bigfoot okay so you know that stockiness is there and uh I'm really proud of fucking kid went to the Olympics whether he lost whether it doesn't fucking matter doesn't fucking matter yeah when you get there and this is what I wanted to fucking do do a fucking podcast in the morning with some fucking Jew in the morning to hang out no you know our dream and you know you watch a lot of sports yeah my fucking dream was to play

for a national championship basketball team on NBC and go to the fucking Final Four and hopefully play in the Olympics and represent your fucking country and do something good you know when you win a fucking whatever national championship your fucking life is made for you yeah you want a national fucking even if you lose in the national championship game you still were there they can't take that away from you know I'm saying I mean and I feel bad at times that my life went in different directions that's what I want I gave up you know I love fucking basketball so when I see these kids living their fucking dream my dick gets fucking hard gets that's the way to do it if you're gonna do it I mean I you know I don't want my daughter to be whatever I don't give a fuck what they are

as long as they're happy but it's real funny we had two different people on today and the honor uh Aubrey yeah I tell you what I like about Aubrey this guy you know people always say I'm happy what I do yeah we all try to be happy I want to do but while we fucking get there we have jobs that fucking suck and we have different parts of your life that they fucking suck trust me I slept on a lot of fucking cars and a lot of bullshit they sucked but you're looking at them now and you laugh and that's what makes you who the fuck you are and you're gonna suffer you're gonna suffer along the way if you have a goal or if you want if you want something so fucking bad I just want a piece I never wanted to be a fucking star or a TV show I just want a piece and to be able to pay my

fucking bills now I'm part of a union I'm gonna get a pension you know but it wasn't always like this so just hang the fucking there you know you may you may be doing a shitty fucking job today but you know what's gonna make you smile when you're like you know what in two fucking years I won't be doing this no more I'm gonna take some fucking alpha brains I'm gonna smoke some dope and I'm gonna write the best fucking song ever you know I'm gonna do this so I'm gonna do that or I'm gonna you know become a fucking professional cocksucker whatever the fuck you want to come you can do it and then probably you're in a bad position today but that's just today you suck it up for fucking eight hours you dig the trench you deal with these fucking idiots but the back

of your mind you have your fucking dream and that's what keeps you alive to go the next day and the next day and write the fucking date down in your notebook write the fucking date down that this ends this is not gonna happen no more after this fucking day I'm gonna be living my fucking dream well it's 18 months away it's a year away get up grab your fucking cock or your pussy smell your fingers and go Jesus fucking Christ I gotta get my life together and shit it's Wednesday the 15th of May and I'm fucking around listen to some fat buck and a juice I kick on a fucking podcast I gotta get out there do my shit and smoke some dope I want to thank fucking Omnit I want to thank my man Steve Mock on America's top team top team I'm sorry I had something in mind I think I spit my

own fucking I gotta go to the doctor then I gotta talk to the dentist to make me stop spitting I'm spitting too fucking much man people sit in the front row of my shows they gotta come with a fucking wetsuit on you're a great soft promoter I don't know why the fuck you're listening to us that's right what the fuck go get something go do something with your fucking life you fucking maggots people love it when you insult them like on twitter it's like a I'm not salt in our body where's the fucking truth you're sitting there listening to fat fuck was that you find no uh uh yes listen to fat fucks you should be out doing did you do any jumping jacks no let me see you do the jumping jacks that the shit you always putting this shit off I'll be like you don't

know what I'm talking about I'm putting it off I don't see you doing that I did it already yes I do I blow my nose blow your nose it always knows the smell of fruit wherever you go how many five six seven eight nine ten the fucking neighbors I said three four relax me the neighbors you're fucking yelling hot sucker and right now the chandelier the poor the poor jews downstairs there's a black couple don't worry about it are they nice people yeah you talked to them already you told me you're a sack of shit why would I tell them I'm a sack of shit I don't know tell us I'm a sack of shit I'm trying to put in Ashley's ass holy that's what happens this shit where's Rosie I love you Rosie's been thinking about you and shit lately he says he wants Rosie

back you gotta get rid of that fucking boyfriend and then come back to Boston give you some real dick I can't tell you nothing this reefer is fucking tremendous this eats them up we'll do something with your lives back sucker that's it that's all I got to tell you guys today we got audit.com go to the box order some products whether it's the 180 the hemp force the hemp force protein do something nice for yourself today be a better friend to yourself all the people that watch I want to love you at least not the box for like a freak when you were supposed to be sniffing or Ashley's underwear that you want you never sniffed on the way when she lived here no I don't sniff people's underwear please tell me the truth oh she wasn't here you got up at night and sniff her

on the way some bang went out like the dirty ones you never bang went out do you know that this computer has like eight million videos it's not 1974 anymore I don't have to sniff somebody's underwear so gives a fuck that but you don't want to be with them you want to be with Ashley you never took one tell me the truth well those crusty underwear she wore all day now we're scratching a little monkey you sniff them you put a little sniff to them you bang went out tell me that you were a family I know you did no I didn't yes you did you're a nasty and then you smell the ass all at the end you never do that oh you filthy fuck I don't know who sniffs underwear now I mean why not it's part of the whole patois you never

sniffed an underwear and waxed one out no what kind of freak are you apparently I don't know fucking not as I'm talking about this is why the fucking girl shows up in Bruce Lee as a sidekick as Kato because you never sniffed her underwear I don't think people want me the other people sniffing their underwear did you ever see him laying around no you didn't think about sniffing her underwear no never when you were here alone you guys should sniff Ashley's underwear and bang went out no maybe come on the underwear and rub it in like fucking stain once they stay removed for you rubbing it and hopefully she'll get pregnant by mistake through the washing machine this should be the weed commercials like not instead of the girl melting into the couch

it's after you smoke six joints and have an edible you fucking I didn't have why you gotta throw up I didn't have no fucking edible the cops pull me over now they're gonna say you had a fucking edible I had no fucking edible what we gotta do is this it's over today it's Wednesday it's May 15th I love you motherfuckers don't forget honest.com don't forget this weekend dumb on New York Friday night tickets online governor's Saturday don't forget 529 the motherfucking ice house live show me lease I add $10 tickets 626-577-1894 and 528 stop fucking around me that Tuesday is testicle testaments 5 comes out the last one the series we're putting all five of them together we're gonna tour the live show with a fucking podcast and at the end some chicks farts and

leaves fucking face tickets are gonna be like 82 fucking dollars because we're gonna pay 75 dollars to the chick to fart in his fucking face and that's it I love you people from the bottom my fucking heart Lee loves you thank you for listening thank you supporting you want to date you want t-shirt you go to Joey Coco whatever Joey Diaz.net JR my main man mother black dude with the big dick will be taking care of you down in Arizona I love that black motherfucker with all my heart he's a business genius and that's it cocksuckers Lee you anything to say no just come to the live podcast that's it no I love you no thank you for fucking being here I do love you listen I do love you and I'm doing the juice videos so watch those if you want how many pounds

like 22 I think when you're down to what am I down to yeah like 240 and you're down to you're not gonna stop to get down to one and a quarter oh one and a quarter head and a juice skeleton on here with your little heart beating with the fucking Hana Kahina Hana one and a quarter I want to get to 150 that's my goal 150 all right I love you keep doing jumping jacks keep swimming stay black with the music we haven't done it well put the fucking thing on how you gonna say goodbye if you haven't what do you need a fancy suit for Charlie got no trucking job don't wear it to you know what I'm saying just in case you didn't know what type of attitude you needed to leave the fucking house today here it is it belongs to you go out there and get what belongs to you listen

to this motherfucker this is John Osborne when he was dirty he had green teeth he was living in apartment with four guys one was Tony I owe me Frank Tony I owe me for your motherfuckers that know what you know here you go this is 1969 they came out his earth but they said fuck it we're gonna change our name to black Sabbath they were earth because there were four elements but they said fuck it this is the second album first one came out in 69 this one came out in 70 what was but I don't know when it was made don't fucking matter here you go listen to the fucking this is the real deal people so before you listen to Chris Brown and fucking Jacob all and I am fucking whatever I am fucking are you fucking kidding me

the first time I heard this had to be about 10 I almost stabbed the motherfucker that day I almost just killed the fucking dog I'm principle that somebody was this fucking genius fuck Ozzy Osborne Sharon Osborne and her fucking wig and her fake fucking face this is when they were dirty and hungry this is it right here have a good day wow yeah yeah Why do they go out to fight?

They leave me there all to the poor Yeah