Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #060 - MIKE BOCCHETTI | UNCLE JOEY'S JOINT

Episode Date: April 28, 2021

Welcome to Uncle Joey's Joint..... It’s Wednesday, April 28th..... Today, it’s Uncle Joey talks with one of his oldest friends in Stand-Up, Mike Bocchetti..... This episode is brought to you by DraftKings & Onnit...... Go to https://www.DraftKings.com Promo Code: JOEY Go to https://www.onnit.com Promo Code: JOEY or CHURCH And don’t forget..... The Mind Of Joey Diaz is on PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/joeydiaz #JoeyDiaz #Madflavor #UncleJoeysJoint #TheJoint #MikeBocchetti Huge Thanks to BEN TELFORD for the Tremendous intro video..... You can find Ben here: Ben Telford Visuals Cinematography and Visual Promotion Agency, Ontario, Canada [e-mail] Instagram: https://www.Instagram.com/b_telford or https://www.instagram.com/bentelfordvisuals  

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All I got to tell you is wash it dick before you fucking piss because You don't want to give cove it to somebody in their mouth in case you get a little fucking I just read I swear to god. I don't know if it was a joke. I don't know if it was a fucked up article About some dude in montana or something that got a rash on his penis And they thought it was cove it. I've been telling you motherfuckers wash your goddamn ass Cobb cove it cock. I don't know. I don't fucking know only in montana But uh, he needs something but uh Yeah, this is the way it is now just wash your fucking hands, please

We eliminate the flu if you haven't noticed We eliminate the fucking flu by washing your fucking hands So the thing I read the most that fucked me up was that 80 percent of people are not showing up for the second shot Jesus christ Jesus fucking christ. What are you fucking scared of? America get your shit together even joey went down there The biggest pussy scared of needles went down there. Would I have gone there for a second shot? Not really. So I don't know what the fucking complain about because fucking 80

percent of people are not showing up that's A fucking gigantic Number do you understand me? So I don't know what the fuck you guys are thinking. I don't give a fuck It's your world. Whatever you want to do. It's up to you. Listen. It's over. It's time to fucking go out We've been in the house for a fucking year. So Watching fucking bad tv bad podcast including this one bad everything So it's time to get out and get loose motherfucker. I think I think biden yesterday said no more fucking mass I gotta double check that but

You know what? I'm gonna wear my mask for as long as I have to I want to double check I don't want no fucking malukias. I don't want no misunderstandings. I don't want nothing. We've made it through this far Fuck it. All right. I don't need to go anywhere. I'm sticking to my plans. You know I'm uh Fucking Just enjoying the summer with my family You know, it's so funny. They're opening up the store and people are already running back To california. So this is going to be a very interesting

Thing to see guys. I don't know what's going on I don't really care. You know when I moved I left that world behind me And I'm very happy I did. I mean I have a couple. I talked to my friends. I check in with them I know what's going on, but I'm really not Really not aware of everything that's going on today. It's it's kind of weird. I've been caught up in this world In jersey. I'm caught up with my family. You know, I'm caught up with my health I'm trying to you know, get a little stronger make the podcast better every day. You know I've been writing a few jokes and that's not bad

Nothing that's gonna fucking blow your wig off your fucking head. I mean, there's nothing genius here There's no dave chappelle eight minutes and 29 seconds. There's nothing but I'm writing and that's a start That's something on the positive fucking note and that's because I'm getting better with the guitar. Don't get me wrong. I'm not gonna Bring back zeppelin. I'm not saying that What I'm saying is that I could see myself feeling more comfortable with it And it's like I've been telling you for years guys. Nothing happens on the fucking couch Nothing, I would love for something to happen on the couch

So, you know what I do? I don't even sit on the couch and I played my little fucking guitar I come back here. I bring my little fucking laptop. I finally cleaned the screen. Thank you guys That's my war laptop. You know, I'm saying that's got covid That's got vd. That's got a ton of shit on that screen. God knows What the fuck is on there? I finally wiped it down. But what happened was it wasn't really that bad It was that the light in my other office just beams off it and it made it look that bad So I wiped it you guys that are concerned. Are you happy now? You know what I'm saying? I give you a lock and all you're worried about is the fucking screen. That's dirty

That's where your head is at. You know what I'm saying? So who gives a fuck? uh today's podcast today's guest is My whole life changed in the early 90s. I mean when I got on stage I got a lot of guys on patreon now that are, you know, thinking of doing comedy A couple people have hit me up on facebook and it's interesting to read their emails And I tell them all the same thing. Listen guys, you're going up on stage for the first time Nobody's gonna expect Bill Burden to show up. Nobody expects Bill Burden to show up Just get on stage

I listen don't even worry about the material. I don't go. I don't give a fuck if you get on stage and whistle For 10 minutes. Just get on stage. It's usually going to be three minutes And the first time you get on stage every minute seems like an hour You can't fucking believe it. You're like, I got three minutes. When is this? When is this portrait gonna end? But you keep going you keep showing up You know and it takes you it takes you it took me two years To really understand what I was doing That's why when I look at videos from other people

Sometimes at night after I do all my guitar homework I'll go to a video like some guy last night was teaching how to play I stay Away by Allison chains. Trust me. I looked at the video. My head almost blew up. It was confusing as fuck It doesn't matter. I'm looking to see what's ahead And eventually I will get there. I know I will get there Because of my comedy background you will get there put your head down Take the ear beatings take the abuse And keep going keep showing up and eventually you will move up that ring. I will guarantee you

But 93 was a very crucial year for me. I was beat up in Boulder I was all fucked up on drugs. It was the tail end. I mean listen I was fucked up on drugs my whole goddamn life, but this was one of those times when I was down and out and I uh Came to new york city. I go when you're down and out and you Are lost you have to go back home You have to find your way home like I kind of did this time I was a little lost. I was a little disoriented. I was doing great comedy wise The church was doing great, but I wasn't living the life I was living so

You know when you usually do these type of things it's to get strength again, you know I'm not saying I'm gonna leave jersey and get the fuck out of here once this all blows over not at all What I'm saying is I came back in 93 to get strength and I started dabbling in comedy. I want to take a chance in new york. See what's going on Listen, if it could if it happens if you could fucking make it happen in new york, you could make a fucking anywhere That was my fucking thinking So I started doing little spots in the city, you know, a lot of people didn't want me to come back I sucked that bad

but one place that was my home was uh, the new york comedy club was owned by a gentleman named al martin and He saw something in me and he would let me Come to the city whenever the fuck I wanted him I mean at that time it was like stand up new york will let me do spots The comic strip would just abuse me and new york comedy club gave me love and

That was the start of many great things for me. But that was where I started to Create comedy relationships and one of the guys that befriended me At that time was michael boshetti He was a sweetheart to me. Um He taught me the ropes at the club, you know, I'm saying he's the one that got me in there And I would try to go down there anytime mike was there. I think I had his number and we would Communicate and stay in touch and it got to the point. Well, I'll talk about even in the zoom My friends would make fun of me. They were like you suck

You should fucking be more like mike boshetti. He's got jokes. You got no fucking jokes You know, it was it was mind-boggling with my friends. But listen, my jersey friends Are like me, you know, we're very fucking cutting dry. We're not gonna blow smoke up your ass. They told me you suck So I was in fact a little jealous of boshetti and I was like, how can I be jealous of this guy? Well, you know, I'll be there someday. That's when all that shit ended. I was like, you can't there's no competition in this game When you start competing with your friends is where you're gonna fucking lose and it will they give everything To mike. I don't get nothing work, bitch Work you want something work for it. They're not gonna give it to you. Obviously. He's doing the right thing and you're not joey

So by me being friends with mike and me doing spots at the old triple in I actually put The pieces together to become a comedian and I went back to colorado In october of 93 after about eight months of doing spots at the new york comedy club and getting stronger I still sucked But I had a direction and I never ever ever forgot michael boshetti. I always It was like what the fuck ever happened to him. You know, we went our own ways another guy that was lurking at that club In 93 it was jimmy florentine He was over there and I did not know him so that just goes to show you

The people I was around that was embarrassed that you know, when you do comedy make yourself a little comedy buddy And you're gonna realize I had a comedy buddy in new york and then I went back to denver and I had jimmy a beta and I had Some other guys jeff sergeant and my comedy buddies there and rick cairns and Todd jordan Then when I went to seattle, I met josh wolf and he was my comedy buddy. Whatever he got I got That's what you need. You need your support group even with comedy the point i'm getting to is Today I bring you michael boshetti on zoom. I know a lot of you motherfuckers don't want to zoom But hey, it's an interview. It's something different and you get away from me for an hour. I'll be back Don't worry, but I'll be back

But uh, right now I want to introduce michael boshetti. Enjoy our little short interview Mike boshetti in the motherfucking house. It's been a zillion and a half years. Joe. How are you? Welcome back to new jersey first of all and civilization where everybody will tell you f off Fuck it's been great, man. It's great to be back. You are my oldest If I think about it, you are my oldest comedy friend. You befriended me in 1991 at the new york comedy club Oh, yeah, and and the thing is you're always been a good guy to me because the thing is Joe, this whole business changed from when we started because

Years ago you had to work your butt off do tons of spots, right? You know what I mean get in And now some imbecile and tick tock has 80 million hits and ca is all over What are you gonna do? It's the way life is you just Listen, we pick our poison. You know, I'm sorry you you You could go on tick tock you go on cameo. Whatever works for you. You know, I mean If an agent wants can you imagine that you know how hard it is to get a fucking agent And somebody does a video they get a million hits and an agent signs them and then It's like the guy from fucking

That movie my private Idaho, whatever that fucking movie the guy with the shirt Pablo Whatever the fuck. Oh, yeah. Yeah, where the what the fuck did he go? He disappeared I know one good movie will Farrell pick them up for the other movie And then he did thing with comedy central and it was so you know I'm sick and tired of Hollywood and all that shit not going with the people who put in the work you watch these sitcoms Oh, yeah, it's it's failed sitcoms that go over and over and over Once the sitcom goes down

Why would you use this person the same person that the sitcom went down with he's the kiss of fucking death No, they don't care. We got a new show on abc and it's the same five fucking faces only reshuffled No, they don't catch. Oh, they don't get it. So when I watch tv at night, I go That's fucking, you know Mike machete spot That's jimmy flooring team should be playing that You know this guy I hate when they say well, he's a comedic. He's a comedian. No, he's not. He's a comedic actor There's a guy there with a camera and another guy that says cut

What we do is fucking raw. Oh god. Yeah, it's uncensored No, it's true because and the thing is y'all want to let you know I'm still a mr. Potato head guy in this house You look good though Oh, it's been a long probably early nineties you think No, I saw you after that. Didn't you do a podcast with rd or something? Yeah, I did his podcast, but I think he was supposed to be on there and then He he had some anxiety issues and then you know, I think that's what happened, right? That was what it was

It was this right. Yes. Yes. You were doing the podcast with him. Yeah, it was fun. I missed it. I haven't spoken to him because The sad thing is I don't have his current cell number emailed because he changes constantly all the time and I can't get You got to get away from the drug dealers I know you got to get out. I wish him I wish him all the love in the world. I love that guy with all my fucking heart Me too I know that you knew your comics love him with all these he's a breath of fucking fresh air, you know Oh, yeah, and I'm sure that everybody just wants him to get well

We all do because Joe. I've been sober 24 years now st. Patrick's they haven't touched a drink Was that your poison alcohol? Oh, it was horrible. Joe. I would be Yes, we were still if I was still drinking now You'll be grabbing me by my ankles Sounded out of a blossom place and throw me in the back of the car because I'd be so become such an idiot when I drank Did you go to meetings? Did you go to rehab? Uh, no, I just stopped now. I was very blessed because my dad went to AA for years. He was a big believer in that You know what Joe? I whatever it takes to get you

Well again, you know me if you need meetings perfect, you know to work for you I just did it on my own But my dad was a big believer in AA and the thing is it works for you to get you well. That's the most important thing Do you miss it? Once in a while like I'll I'll go to a deli and I'll be like See a foster blogger a Budweiser or anything. I'm like I need one of those cold bad boys Now, how would you feel if he just had one beer with a sausage and pepper sandwich? Would you feel you relapse? Do you think you would it would become a problem? I mean

I would be a problem job because that one Would lead to me drinking 12 more sleeping outside of 7 11 You know, my demon was cocaine Well, and I know for a fact That I could never once I quit it and I was off it for three weeks and whatever and then it turned into three months Then turned into three years I always believed that if I ever touched it again, I would just die Like in my world

I think if I cut a line of cocaine up and snorted I would fucking die on the spot That's what my belief is Now you're right because and it's so scary. Jota people can let themselves get that addicted to stuff It's it's really hard. I mean joe. I I just turned 60 and I lost Family friends of a way under 30 to addiction out, you know drug and alcohol and it's I'm I'm I don't even know how I made it to spot and somebody other people I know died half my age You know, I just had surgery and they gave me oxycodones. Oh, no, you know And it was I read all about it. I checked in with two junkies that I knew, you know, and I talked to them about it

about Pill use, you know, I had a friend that had a problem with pills. I talked to him about it And he told me that the big thing that there's a difference between oxycodone and oxycontin Oxycontin is the one that comes in a shell and people break it and snorted. I guess I don't fucking know I had the little five milligrams and You know, they It was it was never fun They were okay for two or three days

And then I felt how they took over my body. They made me very emotional and oh, no Yeah, it was a fucking nightmare and I'll tell you You don't need that nightmare again. No. Oh, no. Thank god. I did them for uh I Stopped on the oxy's and I started breaking them in half. I would do everything I could just to avoid Just to stay ahead of the pain and then I downloaded I told him I had 13 oxy's left. That said it's over Cut me down. They cut me down to viking

Well, I didn't do them for like the first two days and then I did a couple of them and They're still in the fucking drawer. That said it's over. I just don't want to get re-hooked on anything at 50 fucking eight No, no, no because I mean not only that show the thing is It's horrible to be hooked to anything. I mean the only vice I have now is food. I got to wash my I mean I like to eat but I mean You know, that's bad too. If you not careful Well, I'll tell you what when I moved to new jersey. I knew one thing I know that I could blow up to 400 pounds within 90 days

Wow And once I got here, I did put on like 20 pounds right off the bat I put on 20 pounds because everywhere you go Somebody's handing you a slice of pizza There's always fucking pizza everywhere in jersey. You go to any party You go to a kids party. They got pizza and I live in south jersey and this is I'm surrounded by Staten Island and Brooklyn These motherfucking Italians aren't fucking around they argue about pizza. They bring it from Staten Island

They're crazy. I know They're like handing out calzones. It's based on Bayland bridge over there. I knew it and between the chinese food The fucking cuban food the italian food. I knew I would blow up to 400 pounds. So I went on Weight watches even double than what I was doing in LA like I don't even use butter anymore Like that's how scared I am. Well under I've lost I lost maybe 20 pounds during the surgery. Just god bless you. How you feeling now? I feel good the knee bothers me from time to time But you know what?

You take a couple Tylenols You put some ice on the knee and it's way better than anything else you could fucking do Absolutely ice is fucking tremendous. How much comedy were you doing? At the time of the pandemic Oh, you know what Joe? It's kind of weird because I Back to one weird thing about me is I backed off a little bit. I started working more acting stuff I've taken a class like 14 months now Richard Klein It was awesome. We're Irish and priest company. Okay. I've been taking a lot of improv

Comedy classes, you know dramatic improv, but I'm just doing stuff. In fact, you know, it's crazy Today's been such a blessing being on your show. I also today have my cd on serious xm all day today Good What a blessing it is. It's like you on here now that with them So when it rains in post this show am I right or wrong, right? You know, Mike man, we've done it all You have nothing to prove. You know, it's weird when you've Done something for 10 years And then you do something for 20 years and now

We're both like seasoned fucking veterans. This is 30 years And you have all these decisions to make, you know, and for you it was Getting into a dramatic improv class to make yourself better This comedy game with most people at home don't understand is that We're always growing We're always doing things to grow. We try to podcast. We grew with it You know for some comics during the pandemic. They went on tiktok That works for them. You know, I don't know anything about it. God bless all the comics that made it through

Oh, yeah, they they had a switch there game up They had to do fucking, you know Zoom shows I had a you know, I had to move I had to pick up and reroute and restart everything and Look, we're here today. We're here today. Well, you have to take a couple steps back to make some flow Yes, yes, absolutely. And I took a little chunk out of my life and uh You know the stand-up hurts a little bit that it's at half capacity and all that shit. I got my shots Oh, how do you feel? I feel like a million bucks. I got it on monday Oh, good. I got to get my second one in a few weeks, but how do you feel at the first one?

I felt like I was I got a johnson and johnson Oh nice good and I got to tell you it was uh It was painless I want to complain. I would wish I would complain to you Don't go down there. They're gonna fucking hurt you They were the nicest people in the world I didn't feel it Uh, I felt a little weird that night, you know, I took the Tylenol as how they recommended

I stayed Hydrated that's the most important thing to keep drinking fluids Oh, yeah, and then you'll be you know 90% at least if you get it now You're not gonna end up in that bad of shape. They say We'll see Yeah, we'll see I mean, I was afraid to get into the first because I was like, you know, what about the side effects? But you know what you know, we got to end it somehow and back to normal, you know what I mean? You got to take a chance

Well, man, you know this pandemic has taught us a lot Oh, yeah, you haven't learned anything during this pandemic, especially about yourself What you can't can do can't do Can't do can do And what you could What we've realized we could we can do like We realized a lot of things that we had to move forward Stand up and what the fuck do you want me to do? No clubs are open

What are you gonna do you're gonna stand on the corner and do stand up until somebody throws a bottle at you So you had to reroute your energies during this for me. I got together with a partner finally and started writing a book Oh, nice. Congratulations. I got together with mike. I got a new Producer and we started this from scratch and fucking people hated me and you know But I didn't give a fuck, you know, I wanted to start over I felt bored I felt uh I was in my comfort zone, which is never too good. It's great to be in a comfort zone

That's how you raise right absolutely, you know, it was too easy. I'm I created a paradise in LA for myself I created the paradise that I wanted to And then it became easy like it was too boring. I drove two blocks to do a podcast I drove eight blocks to do a set a set I drove two blocks to the gym two blocks to cryo therapy two blocks to the weed store This little I had this little fucking thing in studio city Yeah, your own village. I had my own little fucking village and then This pandemic hit me and my wife had always spoken about moving back here. We have been speaking about it since 2016

We were gonna move back here. Anyway, this just sped up the fucking process And I'll tell you what I'm happy. I fucking did it. I feel better I am better. I'm a way better person. You know, I that's the important thing That's the most important thing you just said because Joe, I never lived in LA I was out there on and off years, right? I liked it For some reason They they got my comedy out there for some reason more than New York They did

Some reason that I don't know Joe. I mean I was gonna ask you right It seems like they're like different stuff in LA more than New York does Well, it depends where you go, you know when you're in In Hollywood, let's say you're at the improv The laugh factory or the comedy store, you know, you have to assume there's industry in the room some type of industry whatever And that messes with comics heads You know, when you first get to LA you're thinking somebody's watching you that could change your life, you know, then You realize that nobody could change your life, but you or you're right be fucking fun

That's that's what happens to people in LA when you first go to LA You go on stage thinking fucking johnny disney's here I'm gonna fucking put me in the next fucking cocoa. No, no, and even if he's there, whatever You have to perform to make them laugh That's the confusion a lot of people go to LA to become stars I went to LA just to Be a comic And I didn't even want to do that. Like I I didn't think I would survive in LA like machete. I mean the last time I saw you

We were doing spots at the new york comedy club. I had taken a stand-up writing class there an eight-week course The guy was great. I bumped into him 20 years later in LA He was a writer on a tv show I think it was al martin who owned the club, right when we were working. Oh, yeah, he definitely did at that time Absolutely this this is still on it today. No another guy does today out a million alone It's like probably seven six seven years But now that's where I met you because but the thing is gel

You got me right away comedy wise, right? And the thing is, you know being unique and different like I was Some comics chastised me in new york. They're like, oh, he's not mainstream like sidetrack or whoever You know what I mean this and even industry people they seem something different come along. They're like, oh, what is this? Well, you know, I mean Listen, Mike, you want to be different. I would love to be John Mulaney I would love for my comedy to be bill burrs You know, we all aspire to do something but at the end

You have to be yourself. That's the key to comedy, Joe and lice That's the key to comedy and when people tell you that in the beginning there's a lot of young comics that listen to this show It's such a cliche bullshit line When people say it to you just be yourself. Just be yourself and you're like, I'm an asshole You know, I'm a fucking retard. What are you talking about? Be myself. What are you talking about? And then you understand it That what they're looking for is what you bring to the game that little different aspect My stand-up is very untraditional. It's not bill burr

Me either. I'm not Knowledges, you know what I mean? I'm not that kind of comic. No No, and uh, you were Very funny. Thank you, Joe. So you but this you but you're yourself like I am because I was I watched your podcast The thing I like about you is There's no nonsense with you like everybody like cow is the people jota like, oh my god They're like the curse agents are gonna like me. You know what I'm thinking, right? Yeah, you don't you like you went on anyway, you didn't have just

Don't shut the fuck up cocksuckers. I'm doing a podcast I know I told them that earlier. Sorry. How many kids you got any kids? Oh, no, my family's here busy Okay, good. How many people over there? Oh, we got like four or five and joe. We got a five pound chihuahua upstairs my brother's dog A five pound chihuahua. What are you the mexican? No, but the thing is she thinks she's a 90 pound rottweiler But what was really interesting about our relationship that I never told anybody, uh, that's why when you reached out I'm like, you know what? This is perfect to tell podcast people because they learn

I want the young comics to learn that this is where I learned it in 1991 Obviously as you remember when you performed at the new york comedy club or any other club in new york, you had to bring a few people You know, you had to bring a few people so You know, god bless me with great friends growing up in jersey, you know that Supported me. They were in shock that I was doing comedy How much am I dope? I really met you in 93

Not 91 91 is when I started 93 is when I met you March 93. I lived in new york. I came back here. I was having such a problem in bolder And I said, let me go back to new york and give this problem some space Joe, I thought you were in the mob when I first met you look like a tough guy I thought you were mafia member when I first seen you I was raw back then when I first met you in 93. I was still doing some crazy shit But I had to bring people all the time to the shows and you would always be there And my friends till this day

Still love you. There's one guy That's still says because you used to have a line that said you work on a bakery. You're in charge of tarts Oh, can I say for you? I haven't said yes, but thank you. What was the joke? I worked in handicap bakery. They put me in charge of the tarts. Oh my god We look at that 30 fucking you 28 years later. I still fucking remember this because On the way home, my friends would be tortured me. They're like, you got to be more like Mike machete well Thank you. They're like you suck

You got to be more like Mike and I'm like cock suckers So for the first couple days, I'm like god damn it. I was kind of jealous of you and then I'm like Bro, I got to do what he's doing He's different. He's not doing what anybody else is doing. That's what my friends were telling me So at first I was jealous of you. I'm like fucking Mike My friends would say to me you got to be more like Mike and I'm like, fuck you. Fuck Mike. What do you mean? I got to be like Michael Jordan. What Mike are you talking about? That's funny because but the thing is

At the end of the day when I first started I went to pips from brooklyn besides from your comedy club, right? and god rest his soul I was up there and what was his name a set set set chills, right Uh, I went there. I was very dirty at the time. Joe's wearing a black little jacket This is what he told me speaking about being yourself. He goes he said I can see you totally love hand-to-hand relation claims. I still built in his day But you know what he told me you can't be him and he can't be you you got to be yourself in this

And that stayed with him. Yeah That stayed with you for a long fucking time, Mike Joe, I actually met him years ago and when I first met I want to tell you a funny story about that I met Andrew Dice Clay in 2005 for the first time at carolines, right? uh, Jim's quarantine introduction to him with don james. They could open it from at the time, right and um I went over to him. Joe. I was like a nine-year-old kid a little

Had a new kid from the block concert like a little like so excited to meet him and uh He broke my balls the first time and I'm like, whoa, you know, but then I met him a couple of times, but Joe he became a good guy to me when when I was an audience so he hugged me, right? And he told me I became a fan of yours now After watching you and that like blew my mind a year after guess Joe for 30 years I watched him and for him to tell me that it was like one of them and emmy Like machete I came out of prison

And for new year's eve, they put me in a halfway house when we get out of prison And for new year's eve I rented out the room in the halfway house. I think they charged me 50 bucks And I played his special for people the one from philadelphia the one that blew him up, you know, oh, yeah, so You and I were both products Of andrew dice clay. I mean I was a product of richard prior. I loved richard. Oh richard's nobody like him Andrew was who pushed me on to the stage because when I saw andrew I said to myself. Jesus christ. This motherfucker is saying what I think

Oh, yeah What I think on a daily basis this fucking guy is repeating So I have I have a chance at this because I'm not the only one that thinks this way Now he comes up to you. Would you like to buy a flower for the lady? Why don't you take that flower and let me plant it in your ass all that That's the way I used to think but I couldn't let people know that No, I lived in colorado and people were nice and stuff and I'd be like what the fuck in my mind I'd be I'd be thinking like andrew dice clay

Oh, it's a lot different then Joe like other parts of the country that would lay back and chill down and like You can't be joe pesce and an idaho Yeah, no, no, but Andrew for me was like the first year that I saw him at the store I did not have the balls to go up to him for all you people at home Well, I think that you go up to people I didn't approach andrew dice clay even though I was a regular at the store and doing spots in front of him You know following him, you know, I would go up at one and he would go up at fucking 10

I didn't have the balls to go up to him one night. He came up to me to settle an argument And I chimed in and that's how we became friends Well, because Joe, I don't like approaching famous people at all I get very like laid back, you know what I mean because unless I know them but get or get introduced to them because I don't know how they are as people first of all, you know what I mean, right? And second of all, like if you're working on stuff you've done, I mean It's not time to take out a you know Hawaiian shirt and take a million pictures of these people who're doing stuff with them and regular people don't get that sometimes

How long did you stay at the new york comedy club after I left? How many years were you there? Oh god? I was there I left there back in like 1999 but I still haven't been I haven't been there probably like Three or four years, but it changed a lot. I mean physically I mean, it's fucking I sit here. I'm looking at you and I I still see that same kid from fucking 28 years ago, you know, it's just uh It's so great to see you. It's been forever because it's great to see you too, man And we Joe we have a couple of friends in comedy. I love that that I know for years someone wanted me to tell you hi actually

What do you call christie miller? How is she doing? She's really cool because she she talked about she goes She goes I love the ads because from the comedy store And you know, she was very cool to me to try to help you reach out to you Felicia Michaels went out for a million years great lady great lady I'm gonna give her a call today as a matter of fact. I haven't spoken to her in a few weeks And I was wondering where the fuck she's been. But yeah, they're both

Solid mother fuckers dog Joe I never I went to the comedy store I the only place I've been went to an LA to do spots when I was out there was the improv in LA I'd never been on to the factory or the store. I went to the comedy store like five years ago, right? Just to hang there You know, I went into a neighborhood so nice to be there Martin Lawrence I went into him outside and he talked to me for like 20 minutes because all I said to him Joe was I love you wanted to be show Martin. That's all I had to say to him, right?

We just talked about everything but comedy for like 20 minutes. What are the coolest people I've ever met in my life? You know, it's really weird when you have a great experience with people You know, I mean you went up to Martin Lawrence. You didn't know what he was going through You didn't know if his wife served them with divorce papers that day. You didn't know if his kids spilt Milk on his fucking stereo people don't know the moment before you see that celebrity what they're thinking and you know you You approach people, you know, you try like I remember seeing Richard gear And I fucking hated him at the time, but I didn't have the balls to go up to him. I wouldn't I would never think of

Going up to him, but it is pretty night. Like the other day I went to get a steak a cheese steak And as I was walking in some guy looked at me and he goes, is that you and I go it depends who you think it is He was an African American. He was an African American kid really sweet kid You know didn't ask for a picture at that time. I didn't have the covid shot, you know So I wouldn't take a picture anyway But we had such a pleasant little conversation 12 minute conversation about comedy We shook hands and we left he felt good about the conversation And I felt really good about the conversation

It's the conversations where they Where people try to get too much from you. I think That because I've been on a set of movies Where I've been talking to a major star About you know, what's going on at the moment there? It's not like I'm telling them about my personal life or that I smoke pot or whatever I'm asking them about a scene in a movie or something And I've seen how they are, you know, I've seen how they've reacted to me. They're short. They're long They're into it, you know, and I never judged them. You know, that's why it kills me when people go

I worked on a movie and I worked with Justin Bieber. Oh my god. He's so cool. You dumb fuck You saw him for two days for three hours You know, that's it. Yeah, you know, you really don't know them like you said because gel you said earlier makes so much sense because When I wouldn't you meet somebody you do not know when on their life that day. No You have no fucking idea. You know, I spent 17 weeks with Adam Sandler Well, I'll go I'll go up in front of a fucking bible put my hand on it and I'll you know testify in open court That he was one of the best bosses I ever had in my life

And he was a great guy, but I was around them for 17 fucking weeks Six days a fucking week Well, I got to see him on his bad days. I got to see him on his good days And he was a gentleman at every fucking single opportunity Joe, I never met him. I mean you spend him as well in his movies and I don't know sometimes You can't lie who you are on camera. You know what I mean for some reason. It's like I mean I picture all the characters he plays

You know, that's part of him and I picture he must be a cool guy like that You know what I mean because certain people you can't hide it sometimes No, you know what I think of him In real life, I think the most the picture that reflects who he is the most is 51st dates I really like them the 51st dates. I I didn't watch any of his earliest stuff I watched the I'll be honest right now, you know, I watched happy madison and I didn't like it I didn't like that style of humor. So I didn't I didn't become an adam sandler fan till I worked for adam sandler

And then I watched every movie and I watched it from a different perspective I had heard there were some problems on the set of happy madison where even the director Didn't like what was going on and he went in and complained about them and they fired him and So I was never I didn't I didn't hate adam sandler. I just didn't like his movies at the time. That's what I'm trying to say Oh, yeah, once I read for him met him it was fucking like a breath of fresh air because

He really I don't know how to say this he Ruined the curve that's what I'm trying to say because I thought that everybody was gonna turn out to be like adam and boy Was I wrong? I've won. No, he's untouchable. No, I've worked some fucking douchebags that people think are great people You know people if you talk to them all that person's so great I've been on the set with him for two weeks. That person's a fucking scumbag I won't say that because it's not for me to say. Oh, of course, but I've worked with some fucking great

I was watching what's that show? I'm dying up here You know It's on showtime. It's about the comedy store The lady who who's the star of that? movie who plays mitzsche shore per se I never met her. I was dying meet her forever. I never got the pleasure meeting Not not mitzsche shore, but the lady who plays mitzsche shore and i'm dying up here

I did two episodes of that show and I and I had to spend a day with her Like four hours in a room. It was just me and her having a conversation But something had happened So her and I got stuck in this room talking and I'll tell you what it was a fucking when I left there My dick was hard because She was everything I thought she could be like she was sweet She was fucking smart You know when I looked at her the first two takes I did with her

And I'm not ashamed to say this. I fucked up just from looking at it. You you got of course You get intimidated. Yeah, you get intimidated. You're like this fucking person She played opposite denzel washington and the equalizer. She I know it flows your mind It blows your mind and here you are doing lines with her and you're just a dirty comic from the fucking comedy store from jersey I'm just a dirty fucking comic from jersey. So i'm sitting there going And she was so sweet to me. Like I've I've I've I love to write a book Of the actors who saved my fucking life on the set. I did svu that lady marissa Whatever haggardy, right? I think was fucking tremendous

She was tremendous. It was the coldest day ever in new york city And it was me and her and she's like, why are you standing out here coming here with me and i'm like This is tremendous. I'm in a hallway With this fucking girl from svu and she's talking to me and she's being nice and sweet Some people are just great people all around Some people are and you know what when to be a good actor to be a good comic to be a good Like to be good at those things

You have to have a great side of humanity to you. You got to be a good human is right You got to like to get the good results from comedy You got to pull the younger people up Of course, you got to help them not listen. I bumped into 200 scam artists in the last 10 years that Thought that coming on the podcast it was going to change their life. I'm not talking about those guys What can you produce about their earlier? Joe, how much have you been annoyed by people? That's why I was very cautious when I reached out to you because I know you had an army of animals harassing you like Joe. What's up, baby? Hey pal

You know that mean all kinds of nonsense some idiots Well, you know the hollywood scene, you know everybody's your buddy. Everybody's your pal. Why you guys it's like life When you got a bag of blow it's tough to have enemies. You know what i'm saying? If you show up with a big bag of blow everybody loves you they forgot about all your fucking past discrepancies and everything, you know um I I I helped the people Who I saw were helping themselves

If I saw a great common moralist busting her ass at the store I reached out to her if I saw, you know, jessica wellington At the store fighting for her life I reached out to those young comics because I was one of those comics at one time And all I needed was something to give me a glimmer of hope for 90 days Oh, yeah, because when you're a comic when you're in the arts When you're a human being you need a glimmer of hope every 90 days to give you hope for the next 90 days Easily because Joe won't the best thing I like about samler is

He brought henry wrinkler back to life Well, not back to life because you know why people still do the fonds of henry for years Maybe not on screen, but he's a producer and directing stuff But he helped give him a whole new generation of people to the home again And that's what it's all that's what this is all about at the end of the day You know when people get mad at joe rogan for getting a hundred million fucking dollar deal and now they They're pissed off adam and this and what are idiots? They don't understand that he lifted up

200 fucking comics. They're morons. You know why because they just first of all They just want to look this has been my philosophy life. Okay when something bad happens to you or whatever You know if you can control it and change it Do it right but if it's out of your control Just live with it and try to move on and that's it because don't be a crybaby You don't see the rest you complain and brag about other people just keep going I knew the people that I saw people at the county store. I saw people at the improv. I saw people at the haha

I saw comics that they had that look in their eye And I would say to them. Hey, you want to come on the podcast and I would see them, you know Do things afterward and they would make my dick hard Well, I hate when people think that Well by going on a podcast, you're gonna fuck it's gonna change your life. That's the people I didn't want on my podcast No, they think they're gonna be in 20 movies after that. I didn't want those people Those are the same people that think that if you go on rogan, you're gonna get a hollywood deal

No, those are not you're not gonna get a hollywood deal when I went on rogan. I knew it would give me a light But now that light I had to fill it. I had to fill I had to prove myself after that and some people came on for the ride and some people didn't you know Of course your people think, you know, it's gonna be one thing that's gonna put you over the top. It's so I mean, I'll give you It's not What were you gonna say you'll give me an example? Oh joe. I'm gonna tell you one quick funny thing I was in the movie the family But Robert De Niro, okay

I was up for one of the roles of an FBI agent got in him. I was in callbacks when I didn't get it but the director Luke the son liked me a lot He cast for me as a sitting Jewish guy being held a gun for it by De Niro Listen to this joe. I I got to the set that day Hello, I'm sorry. I got to the set that day, right? My heart stopped when I seen De Niro on the set, right? Joe, I didn't talk to him at all. I'm on my business, right? Then he started laughing

Right on the set Joe, I mean working with people like him and you work with Sandler They have such an energy. I mean when you're doing a scene with them, they pull you with like a vacuum It's crazy. It's so hard to explain like joe you get on the set with Adam He pulls you with like a vacuum acting wise am I right or wrong like like sand Like De Niro pulled me like when I was in the scene with him. I seen Jimmy Conway come out of my scene all kinds of characters come out of them on that on that scene It was mind-blowing. I've said the same story about him that when I did a scene with him

The first time he came up to me It was like cut the first two scenes because you see Jimmy Conway You see taxi driver. You see all these fun You know, you see all this characters that he played, but I'm gonna tell you something when I did grudge match with him I went to the set the day before I was supposed to shoot just to look around You know me we're hustlers. You gotta go down there and see what's going on So I went down and it was so funny. I watched him and LL Kujae do their first scenes together. Well, they were talking They were, you know, having a great time

Next thing, you know cameras around them Sure enough first two or three scenes LL Kujae couldn't focus And then I was like, that's weird. They were just having a great time When I the next day when I did my scene with him it happened to me that's when I realized why it happened to LL Kujae because

Once you're focused with those guys and it's just you and him you're like, oh my god This is the guy from fucking goodfellas. This is the guy from godfather 2. This is the guy from this Mean streets and it just fucks with your head. It's like I believe that that's what happens to people Before they fight Conor McGregor Oh, yeah They psyched themselves out and they forget what the fuck is going on Conor McGregor is just a human being. He's a great fighter But he's just a human being You know, that's what I think happened to Dustin Poirier

Dustin Poirier fought him the first time got caught up by the lights maglama went down The second time he knew what happened to him Exactly what not to fall for and he beat him. He attacked him. I'm not putting anybody down here I'm just stating what I think happens to you. Of course because it's concentration and focus because Joe, that's like a box you can in the ring with Ali and I'm thinking I'm gonna have a bologna sandwich for dinner to murder you I hear you buddy. I hear you Mike Bischetti, I'm happy that you reached out. I'm so glad you have thank you for having me Joe because

it's been a million years because first of all Joe I have a funny feeling after this Comics you're gonna be like dude. What's up now? I don't give a fuck, you know, I don't care either. That's why I'm on you, you know I just want to do I wanted the world to know that you and I go back to 1993 I want the world to know that I was jealous of you at one time

I'm not a fucking You know, I'd tell it like it is. I was very jealous of you until I Saw what you were doing and you egged up my eyes. So it was so it's so good I would love to see you in person when we can because once this thing is over I'm getting my final shot 17 to help to see you live What clubs do you usually go to new york city? Uh, you know, who's that whoever will put put me up Which ones so far I like I'd

First of all, uh, new york comedy club Got them. I I did stop at the west side. Which opened recently stand up in york And carolines. I love those the rest of them You know, but Joe is so incredible. We'll see you virtually anyway Hey, well, I'll take this And give it a month and I'll see you somewhere in the city and give you a hug deal. Thank you, Joe I love you, buddy. Thank you. Thank you for doing this friend in comedy. What is this come out? Soon a few days soon soon ish. I'll keep you posted. Thank you, Joe. I have thank you

You're the best. Have a great day. Thank you for everything. Bye. Thank you, Joe What's happening you bad motherfuckers? I hope you enjoyed our little chit chat our little ta ta ta With my main man, Michael Buschetti. It was great. Uh, you know, it's been years So I want to just I wanted to show you guys that I had roots even back in new york And early 90s. I just didn't fucking show up here guys. This is all based on hard work And uh boredom and abuse and fucking, you know Drug use and drug abuse. There was a bunch of things involved here But some real I realized I ended up

Getting to a plateau, but it all started With the things I learned in 93 and Michael Buschetti Befriending me and let me know that I was on the right fucking path Listen, I want to thank you guys for a great week of podcast a great month of podcast We tried our best We're trying to get the feel I know a lot of years don't like the zoom I know a lot of years like me straight up and that's exactly what we're gonna do We have another great zoom for you next week and another great podcast

I'm not gonna tell you what is and we're gonna keep moving fucking forward because that's what we do If you want more of joey dears, I'm on patreon The nfts are coming soon. I'm gonna be doing them through patreon and probably putting them online So we got a little couple things going on For you motherfuckers that have been bugging me. We have an interested publisher So hopefully this week we'll have a little conference call With a publisher for the book at least we're getting there. There's no been no offers made nothing like that

But I just want to let you know that this is what I've been doing during this period every day three days a week Me and Erica talking for you guys Listen, I always put pictures up of edibles to fuck with you guys, you know, my friends send me edibles They come back they bring me edibles. I'm not doing anything. It's so weird how I haven't even smoked today. That's how crazy this I was talking to rogan the other day and I'm like rogues. I'm smoking a fucking third Of what I was smoking and I had some shit I went out to dinner with a friend of mine sunday night

It was like we had nothing to do and next thing you know me and my wife We had at the dinners with different fucking people was great And uh, I went to a restaurant and took my mask off and I was sitting in there And there was a couple people in the restaurant So I kind of felt weird right away. You got like a fucking sore throat. You come home and you're like, I got a sore throat I was you know, your mind plays tricks on you So I smoked that night and fucking my lungs started out. I'm like fuck I got covet now because you could still get covet even if you get the vaccine. It's just not so severe

But the numbers are down a point nine or whatever who gives a fuck Listen, there's a light at the tunnel We made it through I was here with you guys since last march doing podcasts I took one month off and I stuck it out with you motherfuckers and I let you know if you listen to those Podcasts from march and april the church of 2020 You'll know I was telling you that this day was always coming We just had to be patient take care of ourselves stay safe

And we're here. That's it. We're gonna have a great fucking summer. Have a great week I want to thank all my sponsors just we draft kings on it cbd line Don't forget to register for the playstation and zip recruiter. They were great. They're always great. I love my fucking sponsors Anyway, I love you guys. Thank you for enjoying it. And we'll be back monday May 3rd tip top magoo the beginning of a whole new fucking month I love you cocksuckers. Have a great week and a great weekend. You know where to find me. Love you All right cocksuckers, I want to thank mike buschetti. I want to thank honnet, but most importantly, I want to thank you guys I want to thank draft kings. I want to thank you guys for listening

For enjoying for trying something new, you know, you know, I'm fucking swinging for the bats here I'm trying myself guys. This is all new for everybody. But before we go listen to me It's going to be a quiet weekend people aren't looking to fucking do anything This is the perfect time They had draft kings because they're not hyping anything. You understand me Nice and easy the mba's right there for you. You're getting ready for your mba playoffs You got major league baseball. The lines are still a little fucking light. You could pick yourself a winner You know, if you're having problems look up to dandy b sports go to look at the filly godfather for help

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