Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #068 | JOSH POTTER | UNCLE JOEY'S JOINT with Joey Diaz

Episode Date: May 26, 2021

Welcome to Uncle Joey's Joint..... It’s Wednesday, May 26th..... Today we talked with our Friend and Comedian, JOSH POTTER..... This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter & CBD Lion..... Go to https://www.ZipRecruiter.com/JOEY Go to https://www.CBDLion.com and enter PROMO CODE: JOEY or CHURCH And don’t forget..... The Mind Of Joey Diaz is on PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/joeydiaz #JoeyDiaz #Madflavor #UncleJoeysJoint #TheJoint #JoshPotter The JOINT is Co-Hosted & Produced by: Michael Klein @onebyonepodcast on: Instagram: https://www.Instagram.com/onebyonepodcast Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/onebyonepodcast Huge Thanks to BEN TELFORD for the Tremendous intro video..... You can find Ben here: Ben Telford Visuals Cinematography and Visual Promotion Agency, Ontario, Canada [e-mail] Instagram: https://www.Instagram.com/b_telford or https://www.instagram.com/bentelfordvisuals  

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Pressing Joey or church and get 20% off your first order. Let's get this motherfucking party started. It's Wednesday, bitches. We got no time to fuck around. What's happening, you bad motherfuckers? The Wu-Tang Clan ain't nothing to fuck with. It's Wednesday, the 26th of May, a beautiful fucking day to be alive. I'm feeling great. 23 days with no weed. And I still don't know any differences than nothing. I wish I could say to you that I'm running Swiss Alps and shit. I mean, I've been working on them and eating the same. I'm doing the same shit. I just, uh, I'm going to keep it up to the 30 day mark and then we'll smoke on camera. I'll gag for you guys and fucking pass out hopefully or then we'll give it another

30 days. We're going to, we're going to ride this bus out until the tolerance gets lowered. I heard through a rumor mill that when New Jersey sells weed anyway, they're only going to sell 10% that's as high as they're going to go. That's the word on the street. I don't know how true it is or whatever, but, uh, it's not going to be fucking good. So I'm letting these Jersey people know now that you better let your tolerance go down a little bit and stop buying that fucking California shit because they're going to keep these numbers low at 10%. That's just a little bit more than fucking Susquehanna weed. I think Susquehanna starts at 12. So I don't know what Jersey is going to be fucking selling. So, but it's been a great couple of days. Listen, man,

going to LA was the best thing I fucking did because now I know where I belong. I know that I'm home. I got a home. Uh, you know, I miss a lot of my friends. I miss a lot of the things, but not really the life that I've created here in the last nine months has been great. And you could see it on my face. You could see it in my eyes. You know, don't get old. That's what sucks. Getting old get sucks. So for two weeks, I was waking up and I swear to God, I didn't say nothing to you guys because I didn't want to, you know, worry. You guys got enough problems as it is. I'd wake up in the morning and I'd have to spit because I got to sleep at me a mask and my mouth would be dry. I get up 10 times a night. I dehydrate. I drink a fuck. You know,

you could die if you're old over 50. You better drink a glass of fucking water before you go to bed because you don't want to dehydrate in the middle of the night and die. I didn't know that either. I would stop drinking water at six. I go to bed. I'd be seeing fucking mirages because if you do more water, you drink the more you got to pee. Then I'm up and down all night fucking peeing and that sucks dick too. So I wouldn't drink water. And then in the middle of the night, I'm seeing fucking mirages. I'm on the desert, seeing a donkey and a fucking Arab or some shit. So I said, fuck, I read snor. I did some reading up on it and you got to drink a big glass of water before you go to bed. But when I still wake up in the morning, I got to sleep at me a mask

and I would feel something on the bottom of my teeth and I would spit and it was fucking pure blood. So right away, you know, I just got a call a few weeks ago, one of my dear friends has cancer. So now you think, well, it's the pandemic, the luck of the pandemic, you know, fucking broke his fucking shoulder. This guy did this. This guy did that. This guy's mother. Everybody had bad luck during this fucking thing. So I'm like, maybe I got fucking cancer. So I told my wife, you know, because I hid it from her for like a week. And then I finally, she saw the fucking blood in the toilet and she's like, what is that? And I go, I don't know what's going on. Whenever I fucking spit and she goes, show me your mouth. And I showed and she goes, look at the size of your gums.

They're fucking swollen. So I took a picture and I sent it to the dentist in LA who had done the original work and she goes, yeah, your gums don't look too good there on this side, especially up. So I fucking call the dentist here. I made an appointment. They had to go through the whole fucking day. Are you vaccinated? Do you need a COVID? I mean, again, I had to go get a fucking COVID test for the fucking dentist. It never ends. I go to the dentist. This motherfucker tells me that he can't go in there because he doesn't want to redo her work or he doesn't know how the fuck don't you know, this could only happen to me guys. I'm having the worst fucking luck with doctors in New Jersey ever. So I said, you know what? Don't worry about it. I'm going to LA anyway.

I called Dr. Sherry. I said, Dr. Sherry, I'm coming in. I'm only being for a few hours, maybe two days. As soon as you go off the plane, call me. I have an opening. I'll slip in. She went over there. She just drilled a little bit down. There was a little bit of blood and then she flossed and then she gave me like an ointment to put on and now my gums are back to normal. No problem. Now I wake up this morning and I got a fucking wart on my finger. How the fuck do you get a wart on your finger? I've never had a wart in my life. I think it's a wart. I don't fucking know. I've never had a wart in my fucking life and I think it's a splinter. I think it's a splinter that got infected, but don't get old because you wake up every morning

with a different fucking ailment. I had knee surgery. Want me to tell you something? Everything hurts except my fucking knee. You understand me? I just had knee surgery, but everything else hurts except the fucking knee. My thigh hurts. My calf hurts. I went to Point Pleasant on fucking Sunday. I pulled the fucking thing onto the beach and sure enough, the next day my friend's like, show your legs hurt. You're not supposed to go on the beach yet. The beach can't really fucking hold you. The sand. That's the second time I went to the beach and fucking my legs hurt like I'm on my right leg hurts like a motherfucker. So now I can't go to the beach for another month or two because my fucking leg, I didn't know this. Nobody tells you this shit. So just do me a favor.

Don't get old. And if you're young, take care of yourself. Take care of yourself, drink water, work on your muscles and shit. I got, it's just a fucking nightmare. And then you guys wonder why I take on it in CBD and magnesium because you got all these fucking ailments as an old man that you, you know, I talk to Rich Voss every day. That's my brother. I love Rich Voss. He's 60 fucking three years old. He's another guy that lives in a world where ailments, I mean, we talk about ailments all day. I get off the phone. I'm going, what the fuck did we just talk about fucking fungi toenails and, and fucking colonoscopies. And you know, so your conversation's about to change young guys. You know, like when you're 40, you're still talking about pussy and shit.

Forget it. Once you get to be like 50, the word pussy don't even come up no more. Cause you know you ain't got nothing to give these young girls. And even if you have the chance, what are you going to do? Show up with that wrinkled up fucking ugly dick. I don't want nobody to see my dick. I'll show anybody my nutsack, but my dick, you never fucking see my dick. I mean, once in a while, I show it. You know why? Cause it's ugly. It's just ugly. It looks like a seal now. It used to look like a dick. Now it looks like a seawall. You go to like San Francisco and you see the seals. They're all fucking blubbery and they got that weird skin. That's what my dick looks like now. I don't want nobody sucking my dick. I don't want nobody looking at it. I don't

want nobody taking pictures. My dick is over after 50. If you're a woman and you're still sucking over 50 year old dick, listen, I can't help you. I can't help you. If you didn't get COVID, that's why cause you're sucking dicks over 50 years old. I don't even know what it started today. It's just a Wednesday. I'm in a great fucking mood. It's a beautiful day to be alive and I'm happy you guys are fucking doing great. Enough is enough. I've been fucking quiet for the last fucking six months. It's time to bust the fuck out. You motherfuckers wanted me. You motherfuckers got me. You understand me? I know there's people on there talking shit online. I don't even give a fuck no more. It's time for me to start talking shit again. I'm pissed fucking. I had a great

weekend though. I tell you what happened Sunday night. I had the Knicks. I figured let me take the hometown crowd rule number one. You never bet a team. Let's say you live in Ohio. Don't bet the fucking bulls. Don't bet the fucking whoever you have that's in Ohio or whatever. I don't even know. Ohio state like let's say if you live in Ohio, they tell you don't bet local teams. The other Sunday I woke up. The Knicks were in the playoffs for the first time. They weren't even supposed to be in the playoffs. They were getting points and I forgot to bet them when the game started. So I went on fucking draft kings and they fucking let let me bet the game like in the second quarter getting two points. So I'm all excited. I fucking turn the game on. I come home

from the party and Knicks are winning. I'm like I'm gonna win $47 because it's a $50 bet. You win $47. They pushed. So I pushed fucking Saturday night. So Monday Mercy's got a softball game. I go fucking I'm at the game. My friend shows up. He's like did you look at the lines tonight? What do you like? I go I didn't really look at anything. I don't I don't think the heat's going to be Milwaukee or whatever the fuck they played. But I go I don't like either team. I don't know much about them. So what I'll do is I'll just bet the under the fucking under loss. So last night I had to pull a fucking degenerate gambler move and I bet fucking Denver given two and a half again 50 bucks to win 97. Boom. Denver won by fucking Denver was given nine and a half. I'm sorry they

ended up winning by like 20. Then Tuesday night I was gonna bet the the fucking nets again. Listen I love draft kings for that reason. Draft kings when you fucking sign up they send you little emails like last week they sent me an email. Better dollar that's Stefan whatever isn't gonna hit a three-pointer. Are you fucking retarded? A dollar wins you 55 dollars. I'm 55 dollars richer. You know I bet the fucking dollar. You know I'm I love all that stupid shit. I told you I was bored and I told you there's a way to gamble just to have fun and I'm proving it to you guys. Tonight I don't know who I'll take. I don't even look at the fucking games tonight. But tonight I'll go 25 bucks. That's it 25 to win. You know who cares. Everybody wants to.

You think you're really gonna make a living off fucking game. I love these guys that think they gotta make a living off gambling. I gamble just every night when you throw on TNT they got two fucking games. Every night I look at the game for two minutes like I should have bet this game. I would have watched it. Finally I said let me bet the fucking game. I'm not having a bad week but I'll tell you that's the one thing that's fun about draft kings and then I didn't even sponsor me tonight. I'm just telling you I have a blast with them. I really do. That I don't know anything about fantasy sports. I know nothing about that. When I signed up first I signed up on the fantasy side. I'm like what the fuck is this. They have like these dollar pools and I'm trying to put these

teams together and my budget is too big. I don't even know what the budget is of my fucking team. So I said I transferred my money over from fantasy to sports betting and I've been having a good time. That's what I wanted to tell you. Anyway going to California last week was a very good move for me because I felt ever since I got over the fucking jet lag and the fucking not sleeping for two days and the whole thing it's been a lot better. I've slowed down the tea also. If you've noticed you see I'm not posting any more pictures after that last tea excursion I'm done. That last tea night fucked me up. I'm still drinking the tea. I'm just not blowing it up with the fucking syringes and shit no more. The last night I did that I had a dream that Del Castro was chasing me

on a fucking speedboat and I could see his beard and that's because of the weed because I'm starting to dream in color now. It's like when you do fucking shrewd. It's like when you do alpha brain you start dreaming in black and white. Now that I removed the reefer I'm starting to dream in color and that's fucking scary because I never had dreams. I don't remember even fucking dreaming. I pass out so hard at night on those fucking edibles. You know I don't even have dreams. I wake up in the morning and my eyes are fucking red but I've been having dreams. That's one thing about not smoking reefer that I've been having very visual colored dreams. So the last week or so this has been going on like for the last 10 days. I had a dream about my mother. I had a dream for

Del was chasing me. I had a dream I was doing comedy somewhere and I was bombing and I was cursing myself for getting on stage. You know I just have these weird fucking dreams. So if you want me to know what's going on that's the only difference from the smoking weed is that my fucking eyes that I'm having fucking colored dreams. That's the only difference I'm getting. So for UPF that's it. I'm just getting weird dreams and I'm seeing them in color but as Wednesdays we have a guest today. I've known this guy for a long fucking time. I've seen him go from being an open mic to a real comic and I have nothing but respect for this young man. Before the pandemic he had a lot of things going on like a lot of us and the pandemic

took a lot of those things from him. He was going to shoot a special. He had a couple things going on. So I checked in with him. You know we check in with each other once a month and a couple weeks ago I was talking to him and I figured let me put him on the show. He had a fucking fucked up time during the pandemic. I mean he didn't lose anybody or nothing like that. It was great but he had a lot of things to lose. The things I lost I didn't even sweat. I knew that people were going through a rougher time so I never made a big deal about them. I never even mentioned them until today on the interview when I lost. So it doesn't matter. We have our health. We have our families. We have our jobs and sometimes that's the most important

thing. That's what I've gotten from this fucking last 15 months. That's the most important thing. So when you have all those things and now my mind like I said I needed a couple months to pull the fucking layers off the artichoke. The artichoke is starting to show. It's like my dick. I'm on circumcised. If you look at it it's got the fucking skin on the top. I got to pull the skin back so you can see the helmet. The pink meat. It's the same thing with me. The pink meat is starting to come out cocksuckers so get ready. You know what I'm saying? I've been getting the itch too. I'm not saying nothing. I think I'm going to start doing some guest spots here next month. I got a busy this month. Baseball tournaments. Softball tournaments. You know I got a lot of shit going

on but I've been writing lately. Thank God Mikey gave me the gift of the guitar. It's opened up my mind a lot in different ways. I'm doing things with the guitar. I still suck but at least I'm getting sounds out of it. You know what I'm saying? Which is something that I never got before. I'm getting sounds out of it. I have an idea what I'm doing. No I'm not ready to play for you fucking cocksuckers but thank you for the people who have encouraged me. There have been a lot of people who have sent me free material on the guitar and it just shows me that uh what comes around goes around man. I helped you at one time and now you guys want to help me back so thank you very much. I hope you enjoy this interview with Mr. Josh Potter. Josh Pete. Hey hey there he is looking good.

What's happening you bad motherfucker? Dude not much man just getting back in the groove baby. Things are opening up. You getting on stage? I'm trying I'm trying my best oh shit my bad. First of all I gotta give you props. Get it sturdy for you here. You're fucking you're fucking you're sticking it out in LA and I gotta give you props for that brother. Yeah man I got I mean I I was presented with the choice of moving and then it was it was removed so I I found myself with the uh like hey I guess I could go wherever I want really but then I just I just figure like fuck it man I'm gonna stay and uh and stick it out and see what happens I just got here it kind of feels like still so and you know now maybe uh LA comes down to to my level a little bit you know

what I'm saying we level up a little together you know I'm coming up it's coming down yeah yeah I see the line ups and I see a lot of people are missing and uh I'm happy for a lot of the young guys that stayed you know it looked dark for a while but uh nobody knew what comedy was going I mean I can't imagine like last June I didn't know where the fuck this was going I had no intention of going on stage I had no nothing I mean and I thought about other comics I kept in touch with as many you know I pushed that podcast till August till we left yeah I mean I pushed it all the way to the end scared did it with a mask on you know I was scared to fucking in fact guess you know it was just too rough and uh it broke my heart when I left a little bit I felt like I

quit it you know but I knew I wasn't quitting I was just this was the evolution of my life you know I got the LA like you you know ready to fucking stab my motherfucker on the bottom level you know not getting spots nobody talks to you you know people make funny little fucking remarks and you work yourself up and I saw you doing great before I left I mean you were really out there every night I know the podcast was getting numbers people were listening to you so you know yeah it was uh I mean the beginning of this whole thing when it happened I was like of course is that like it felt um like a personal attack the way that you know everyone was going through it though so you couldn't you can't have that mentality you lost a lot more than what I lost

I know that you had a lot of things in the works you had like a special you had a couple great fucking things happening and I remember telling Lee to send you my love he I know if he went on his podcast and I go send him my love I know that his job was because you had all these things it was going to be your bust out fucking year you know what I'm saying I lost like the Sopranos I lost opening up for Joe at the garden like I was going to the mess square garden 10 minutes 15 minutes at the Boston garden the home of the fucking Boston Celtics you know I lost a lot but I there was people who lost their lives of course fuck about a comedy gig you know what I'm saying like that's in June I was kind of bummed and I was mad at the pandemic but I'm like there's fucking

freezers filled with bodies whether the pandemic killed them whoever killed them Trump's cousin I don't fucking know but they were people were dying yeah so I wasn't worried about a fucking stupid comedy gig you know when people started opening up clubs I got very angry because it was highly contagious and I know you need to laugh and need to get out but not at the expense of somebody getting sick every time there was a comedy show and there was 300 people in that room somebody died yeah somewhere from the result of that I remember I had the same train of thought like eventually it came down to the effect where I was like you know sitting here getting pissed off about you know losing gigs and and all that shit because like you said I mean

my first headline like headlining the clubs I always like you know you scratch and claw just to get a guest set at before and now you're headlining them and you're you know you're going on this run and then it all got wiped away and I was pissed off and like upset but then like you said you know you see the bodies stacking up you see people like you started really like toward the fall knowing people who got sick from it and my you know my mom got him my sister everybody got it and it started like you know you're like this is bigger obviously then like you said like a comedy gig or whatever you know what I mean people are losing like their lives and their family members and all that shit so yeah it's rough and it even made me take like a more important like

personal inventory than just comedy too you know because I sat here without comedy for the first time in 12 years or whatever and I was like man I realized I don't really have much else you know like there's not much else around me so I mean but you got you know your daughter you got your wife and everything like that I realized you know I've been running around these past 12 years chasing a certain dragon and I wasn't really putting the things into place to have a life outside of that kind of thing and I need to like concentrate on that a little bit more you know fucking 35 now you know so I did the personal inventory also it was kind of weird that you had no choice at one point you're in a room you're alone it's June when the pandemic first started

I gotta be honest here I was happy that we're canceling gigs I'm like at least cancel till June we'll be back in July or whatever you know I could do Vegas and this and then I just I lost like I was like there's so many bad things happening you know so many like I see so many homeless and this and then when I got this thrown at me about moving you know this was big on me this fucking war on me like I didn't care about comedy all I wanted was my daughter and wife to be happy and safe and in fucking school and in fucking school that was my thing you know so this move for me like Austin didn't really wasn't a thought it didn't even come into my mind because I knew I was coming home I wanted to come home I had been done when I came back here to

shoot in 2019 I just thought that I was missing too much and that I wanted my daughter to experience what I had in Jersey and I'm happy I'm just fucking generally even more like I don't know if you know this has been 22 days since I smoked weed how to fuck no way 22 fucking days no reefer you know I think it was the Johnson and Johnson vaccine they put some in those motherfuckers that doesn't let me smoke anymore I don't know what the fuck happened but that's 22 more days than me my friend I'll tell you oh no and I'm not craving it I'm not in a bad mood I'm not yelling at anybody I'm not curry I don't have road rage I didn't shoot a five-year-old in the stomach and I like you know I have none of these fucking things going on which is rare because when I first had

to go off weed in prison I was like a fucking monster the first week I couldn't sleep I was yelling at everybody I was throwing pots and pans but then after this settle in you're like ah no reefer but I just wanted to I think I needed just to restart like you know like what's that thing you do with your computer yeah reboot reboot I just needed a reboot you know I had a slowdown with the fucking drugs I'm 58 years old I'm eating 10 000 milligrams a day I'm walking around my skin feels like alligator skin now I got moisture in my skin my feet don't stink anymore I had the stink coming out of my feet between the fungi toenail and the cheese it was murder I would go to jujitsu people be looking around what's that fucking stink I started putting tea tree all on my toenails

now they're beautiful I look like fuck I got like Elvis feet you know I'm saying the fungi toenail is done that little stink in my fucking sock I had like a little wink in my soccer cheese and it smelled like subway sandwiches in my fucking sneakers so I made changes everywhere what have you done now what have you got what have you put together now well I've been uh I mean I now it's like things are opening again so I've kind of been you know now it's like let's get a let's get our nut together let's get a nice living situation get out of this apartment you know I have a roommate I'm fucking 35 I got a fucking roommate like I want to you know that's terrible I got to get the fuck out so that's my goal I mean I just want to have a nice setup like an adult wood for once you

know and uh afford that and like you know gather some things you know I don't know like uh it's not like I know those things aren't going to make me happy but it's like you know you get a couch you get a couple things going then you got a girlfriend and then you got a fucking you know a girl that you know comes over once in a while you have dinner and you know stuff like that normal shit uh as opposed to like you know fucking bringing home some bar haggad for it you know what I'm saying like it's just the differences in lifestyle in that kind of way come with I feel like just having a living space uh you know for myself and I can grow from there you know so now we got the new studio going up and I'm gonna move out that way and then I hopefully I can just you know walk to

that ride my bike or whatever because I'm not driving out here at all so you know that's the goal man and then hopefully you know down the road I'd love you know I'd love to start a family it's never been something I even thought of until the pandemic I always thought like yeah maybe down the road or whatever but I realized during the pandemic the road is here I mean this is it dude I'm fucking mid 30s like now all of a sudden it went it like crept out I felt like I was 33 just starting a headline on the road and then all of a sudden now I'm 35 and it's like it didn't it hasn't really started yet and all of a sudden I'm 35 it's like whoa it's a bit of a shock in terms of I don't know why the two years but it's all of a sudden I'm kind of like holy shit dude

you're fucking getting up there you know. Josh Potter you're 35 years old at 35 years old I wasn't thinking about anything except comedy you know I was so every I was a loser in every other aspect I couldn't keep a job you know I fucking hated jobs you know that's one thing about the pandemic like in June that I was I was cursing my comedian success because I was like you got to be really careful what you wish for because it just might happen I wished for not having a day job now I'm sitting here on my hands all fucking day during the pandemic maybe I should go to Rouse and stock supermarket shelves or whatever you know I I felt like I wanted to do something different during the pandemic like I just like how the fuck did I get to this point that I don't

have a job now yeah no that makes sense and you got to be careful what you wish for so I didn't think at 35 I was grinding it out I was snorting coke I was bringing home barhags I was contacting diseases you know you're fingering people on triple runs you know there's no stability you don't give a fuck about living on couches and I gotta tell you something. No yeah that's the same here and then the pandemic woke me up from that it was weird it was like hey man like I would have kept I would still be on this path you know what I mean but it was like it was this pause and all of this that made me go like whoa dude like this is what you've been doing this for you know 12 years and I'm gonna still keep doing it by the way I'm gonna

keep going hard but it made me go like hey I should pay attention a little bit to becoming a man too you know. Well that didn't happen for me till I was 44 so he did nine years ahead of me like when I was 44 I had nothing I had nothing I was a guy that had a couple movies under his belt and I couldn't cut it together I was headlining but I wasn't a headliner you know not even close you know and I knew I had to get the drugs out of my life that was the first step and I got the drugs out of my life and then my girlfriend became more important to me and then my girlfriend ended up becoming my wife and I still resisted it I still resisted that normal life then my wife got pregnant I was ready to quit stand-up in 2009 oh shit a lot of people don't know that that I was out

I was like I'll open for Joe you know I wasn't doing spots at the store yet I go I'll open for Joe I'll do spots at the haha and when my friends call me and spoon me movies you know I have friends that call you and say you want three days on a movie I'll do it then the podcast world came along and that picked up stand-up and that's how I got to this place but I was out I was out I had already known that I had been running from not having a family for 20 years like I had been I had once I got divorced it affected my inside so much that I didn't want to deal with that pain ever again and my wife just stayed on me you know she stayed on me and then I started turning over the business to her you know I started asking her for advice should I take this gig is this gig worth it and

she started telling me no when we became a team and now everything has changed I wish this would have happened 10 years earlier when I was 35 but I was too hard-headed and I was too stupid so I applauded you for thinking in that direction that's the best applause there is oh yeah no don't worry about nothing that was my garlic pill sorry about that I promised I wouldn't fart on this podcast but from time to time shit happens you know I'm saying what are you gonna do what are you gonna do and it smells tremendous these are the times when you need a mask you know I'm saying like yeah right now you have 10 people in this room and smelled this fart they put their mask on so fucking fast but hey it happens from time to time you got to drop a bomb here and there just to

let people know I'm back you know I went you know I was in LA last week I know I heard you snuck out here for a little bit you said 10 hours 10 hours wow really I was supposed to be there for three days wow I took a look at Ventura they closed the Chinese restaurant they closed so many fucking things on Ventura oh yeah North Hollywood's a mess it broke my heart I looked at Lancasham yeah and my heart was broken so I basically my breath from some conscious jujitsu picked me up he took me right to fucking ice cream cake I got my weed you know I ordered my stuff from there I had to go to dentist because my gums got all fucked up I put caps on before I left my gums got in fucking infected I was waking up every morning spitting blood right away for people

don't know me I spit blood I got cancer I'm calling fucking you know I'm at brick hospital telling them I got cancer that I'm shitting to see if blood comes out of my ass because another one of my friends got diagnosed with uh cancer so now for two weeks I was spitting blood I would come on the say nothing and then one day I told my wife I don't know what this is it's come the blood is conglomerating behind these teeth oh shit she looked at and she goes your gums are fucking horrible take a picture and show the dentist so I showed the dentist then she told me to go to a dentist here that dentist told me I don't want to redo the work she did oh like if you need it so I said you know what I gotta go to LA anyway I'll just see it so I stopped by her she made a couple fucking

things she gave me a prescription for a cream and then I had I checked into the hotel the holiday and I know her across from Denny's oh yeah I saw a fucking I'm sitting there and I see a tent with a crib next to it I probably walk by you by the way when you're over there a couple times yeah yeah I go I walk over there and I said you know what I'm not fucking staying here tonight I was walking down a sunset up in the east part like in Silver Lake area in the night and I'm walking up alone you know and there's a baby stroller at the corner and I'm just like I don't want to even look inside there because it's so fucking gnarly out here you know what I mean I don't even want to know what's in the baby stroller just in case you know what I'm saying so

I just walked by and I pretend I didn't see nothing you know and I can get away with that kind of thing you know I was like I don't I was just sitting outside waiting for Dean Delray we're gonna go get some tacos and I'm like is that a homeless tent with a crib next to it and under a tree they had it perfectly it broke my heart yeah I crossed the street to see if there was a lady there I would have thrown over 20 or got a milk or something but there was nobody in there so they just live in there and then they leave in the day I don't know what the fuck it was listen it wasn't the homeless it wasn't the businesses what I realized was my time was done in LA I had done my time sometimes you do your fucking duty

you're done I knew I wasn't gonna go to the store I said my goodbyes to the store already I went to the building I rubbed my name on the wall I fucking sat on the stairs with my daughter I told her a few stories I did all this in July so I made my peace with the store I had made my peace with Los Angeles I went out there just to take care of some stuff look today just my wife just went now to pick up the prescription that the doctor see the doctor here wouldn't give me the medication I needed and he didn't want to lift my blood pressure medication and that was the other thing for the last fucking 60 days no fuck I got surgery five months ago for the last six months I take my blood pressure twice a day is it going down perfect nice it was it was perfect 120 over 80 sometimes I

wake up in the morning and it's 130 over 80 but I'm still in the neighborhood do you know what my blood pressure was in LA at three o'clock when I walked into the doctor's office oh my god what was it it was 180 over 100 Jesus and he was like Joey what's going on I go give me 10 minutes because it was a new chick that took my blood pressure then he took it and it was still 160 over 100 oh what's going on with you because we talk all the time me and my heart doctor I got one here in jersey but he's up tight so I just talked to my fucking he's a Jewish dude I love this motherfucker we talk about porn and you know he's just a dirty fuck I love him he's great he's 66 and uh I went there just that's how much how uncomfortable I was in LA when I got back to the

whole tattoo room I'm like I'm not even laying on that bed I'm getting the fuck out of here that's great and right on the same day right back just on this I go my back's gonna be dead tomorrow from sitting for 12 hours but I don't give a fuck I'm not spending the night here I didn't know what to do in LA all day Friday what was it gonna do sit in my room I'm not smoking yeah I didn't know where you were I didn't know if you were in town I didn't know if you were opening for time on the road yeah no sure I mean it's uh it's not even that open out here I mean no there was nothing going on I kept looking down the street and there was there was it was empty on Ventura it was empty on Lancashire Lancashire I saw some weird stuff they did

clean up a lot I didn't see a lot of homeless in north hollywood not I did notice in the last like month north hollywood's gotten a little bit better I mean it was like I remember it was like thunder domed on there for a little while late there was that that sign I get out of the subway station there on north hollywood and I walk to the you know the corner there of Lancashire and I forget the Burbank Boulevard and there's that uh big welcome to north hollywood like concrete triangle pyramid thing and some people I assume homeless people picked it up and like moved it into the street because they and so they could sleep on that part of the the land like they took this concrete structure I don't know how many people it took to lift them but it was like so

fucked up that they moved it so far away from where it was it just stayed there I was like who's gonna move that back the cops aren't gonna fucking move it back no one's touching it so it just stayed like in this middle of the road kind of area that train station was what pushed me over the top that train station was the station that I left because my office was right there yeah you tape the podcast right there if you get off the train and walk to the corner and cross the street and keep going straight that's right when I came to do your show I did that exact thing you hit the office you have no choice but they hit the office so one afternoon I think it was we did Joe McHale I got out there like at four and I took the long way around you know just to stop on Lancashire

and I was gonna go to a weed store or something you know yeah and I went that way and I made a right on that and then there's a light next to the golf store and people cross the street in between the train they put a coffee shop there and shit yep and I'm sitting there minding my own business you know I'm at the light and I'm just looking around listening to Ozzy's bonyard or whatever the fuck got on serious and I just look over to the left and I swear to God I see a lady waiting for the bus because there's a bus station there too the train station and then they don't let then there's cabs all the way to the corner you know you get dropped off there and a cop seizure to $200 ticket you can't even get dropped off there. Yeah that's what Leeds told me that you

found that out the hard way. Yeah I got a $200 ticket dropping my wife off over there one day you can't even stop there so I'm looking at this lady at this train for some reason I just looked over at this lady and I saw a fucking four by four hit her right on the head and she fell on the length of shit and then I go what the fuck is that and I see the guys start hitting people one at one at a time four in the afternoon they're going down now you know exactly where I am at that light yeah he's he's probably hit by now three people oh my god and he hit like two guys but he hit a chubby guy and the chubby guy got up now I'm thinking it's a crazy homeless guy right like right away you see your stick flying you want to assume nationalities and racism and all this shit

right so like I'm sitting there going this has to be some crazy fucking you know whatever and next thing you know the fat guy throws a punch and he hits the guy and I could see that you know once people started getting hit they started spreading people like what the fuck's going on so now the clouds parted and I can see the true color of the sky I see the guy with the axe handle not the axe handle but a four by four and he gets punched in the face he kind of like loses consciousness he looks at the chubby guy the chubby guy picks up his suitcase and just dodges across the street now I see the guy with the four by four chasing him he's got no t-shirt on he's got a warrior's vest on and he's a white dude so all my racist whatever went out the window

right like I'm like oh it was the Mexican dude you know like I thought it was like a fucking legal or something no it was a white those meth tweakers man those those math yeah those next week is they'll fucking stab you on silver lake and shit so I'm watching this guy go across the street like he runs right in front of me and he's chasing the chubby guy and the chubby guy is scared because he hit him with everything he got and fucking Rambo didn't even move he just like was a little rattled and the next thing you know I go you know what I'm making a fucking U-turn I'm gonna hit this car because I could catch him by the office and there's never witnesses by the office there's never anybody by that office like there's never anybody on that street you

could shoot a motherfucker in front of that funeral parlor and nobody'll see it so I made a fucking U-turn and I made the street name is Hartzuck isn't it? Hartzuck that was where my office was I made the left and when I made the left I waited for him at that corner to see where he was gonna go and I could pick him up with the car the motherfucker saw me he ran up and he saw me with the car and he turned around he ran back towards the train he hooked the fucking left back to Lancashire he threw the wood on the floor he knew you were gonna run him over he knew I was up to something because I was like looked at him like okay just run into the street I'm gonna hit you with this car I didn't know I was gonna hit him and keep going while I was gonna hit him and down

911 and say it was an accident and put the two by four in his hand and there'd be three bodies laying around he was like this guy was running around like a loony too anyway so he just ran in the street in front of the car so when I passed him I actually looked up the corner and that was really sad the chubby guy was on the floor and there was a puddle of blood laying to his head oh my god and I went home that's the kind of shit dude that I don't know that's what a way to fucking go you know just some guy at the train station at the train station and I'm like I went home and told my wife I think it's time to abandon ship and then she went to the post office which is right down the block from there because if you cross that street there's a there's a bus station and then

there's like a coffee shop they put a coffee shop in there across the coffee shop is the post office and along that line they used to be homeless people they cleaned them up and the day she went she couldn't get in there because one of the homeless guys stabbed the other homeless guy I was bleeding right in the fucking street right there by the post office she's like whoever's getting t-shirts aren't getting them this week because I went to make a fucking delivery and some guy got stabbed the cop wouldn't let it go back there so I'm like this is the guy who sells socks on the train just got stabbed you know and like you fucking you know you're from Buffalo you know you've seen crime in Buffalo sometimes they tailgate and the Buffalo Bill guy hit another

guy in the head with a helmet you know that's Buffalo that's Buffalo you know New York City is New York City you're gonna get mugged up at the uh you accept that you know what I'm saying you accept that you go down to Camden New Jersey you're gonna get mugged you know you you go to Philadelphia now you might get hit in the head you know what I'm saying but that's the east coast we've always had that for that I didn't I didn't grow up watching California going to California to see that type of stuff I never saw that type of stuff in California right and that's why I kind of feel like I I should stay do you know like I it's part of the reason where I'm like oh I'm feeling it's not that I'm feeling more comfortable with everything but it is more like everyone who

I felt uncomfortable around seems to be out of their element now whereas I'm just kind of like yeah it's like you know the crime whatever you know it's homeless people it's crime like I have that you know people used to come from New York City to Buffalo and be really sketched out so that I always found funny because I always found thought Buffalo was like a small town you know what I mean I never thought of it as like scary in any way I always felt safe everywhere I went but I'd have friends come visit and they'd be like this is gnarly dude like you live over here no joke no joke I told you I used to do Rob Liedemann's room way in 98 and I used to take the bus from Port Authority up there so I was at that bus station a couple times yeah one day I'm

in Buffalo I'm minding my own fucking business there was a McDonald's close to there or something and I walked over to the McDonald's because my bus was delayed or some shit and I bought one of those breakfast sandwiches with the potato and the fucking soda and the apple pie and I just finished eating it I don't want a litter in Buffalo you know what I'm saying when I was a kid I was a litterer and then you got to make peace with mother nature mother nature is a mother fucker you know you throw peace you throw a can out the window next thing you know you're in Florida in a hurricane so you got to be careful mother nature she'll drop some karma on you so I was walking the bag to the garbage something I would never do you know what I'm saying right McDonald's

bag throw on the fucking floor but I was a comic I was trying to you know be the right person so let me go over and throw this away dog I'm not 10 steps from the garbage can and some Buffalo brother because Buffalo brothers are coolest shit he came run up to me huffing and puffing he's like yo chubby dude what he goes chubby dude you want to buy a gold chain I go that ain't gold he goes this is golden a mother fuck I just took it off the dude's neck and I went in my pocket I had a 20 that I paid for the breakfast the breakfast is four dollars so I had like 15 dollars in change like all I got is 15 and change it's like good to go I just had that gold chain till about 10 years ago I swear to god no shit that gold chain was solid I don't know what I lost it

in the hotel because when he ripped when he ripped it off the person's neck the lock stayed on their neck so I had to use like a pin and the pin finally fucking popped I was too lazy to go to jury store still got the guy's hair that fucking chain had DNA on it blood that black dude tell me yo chubby dude you want to buy a chain I'm like I'm buying a fucking chain I don't give a fuck I used to live like two blocks from that train station that's what my friends are talking about when they came to this they were like this is weird that's a sketchy bus station dog yeah I went there one night and I saw some sketches like I always got out of there in the daytime but one time like I had like a I think I was going that's right I used to go to Buffalo to sneak into Canada

so I had a my friend's father was a gambling dude and he was a high roller up in Canada so they had a back road he didn't even have to go to the border so he would take me to the back road up by like Ottawa and shit yes and that was not even Ottawa I would get off and I would be close to I'd be in London Canada okay yeah yeah yeah you take the bus the month I would take the bus to Toronto from there but the funny thing was when I came back he wouldn't pick me up I take the bus back so when I get to the Buffalo the when they check my paperwork they put me in the computer and they see all those felonies and they go how the fuck did you get in here when did you get in here and I was like I was here Thursday you were here you're the one that left me in because

I would never let you in here look at this crime record you have I'm like I'm telling you I got in here by you it was you I was gonna get in here yeah you you and you and all of like no it wasn't we were we didn't work on Thursday I go yes you did I would do that constantly and then after 9 11 they got hip to me and they're like listen you ever come back in here again we'll fucking throw you under the jail yeah I'm not allowed in Canada myself and growing up in Buffalo it was like such a shitty thing because you're 10 minutes from the I was going to Canada all the fucking time and you know you don't even know that when you're like you get a DWI in Texas you don't know that you're banned from Canada for like a decade or whatever but you find out real quickly in Buffalo

that you're banned and I got stuck one time because I didn't realize that it was like a 10 year fucking ban and they were like you know they flagged me and they did all that shit and I started asking around because I started getting just for laughs like auditions and stuff and I was like what if I get this how am I gonna get up there you know and a bunch of comics who had DUI's they showed me like where people would run like almost like Mexicans run across the the border to come into America that's like that to go into Canada they show you the routes and you're like you're just you they'll be speaking French on the other side of the woods basically so you'll know you're there so I was like oh really so I you learn a little yeah a bunch of comics

that were New York comics used to like make that jog like when they would get the festival if they couldn't get into the country they would be like I can't afford a lawyer or whatever to pay to like fix this for me so they there was like little routes that a couple guys would tell me about running across the border to go to Canada to go do just for laughs of all things Josh Potter it's been really good to see you man you're good to see you too thank you so much for having me you know how long have we known each other like I don't even know how many times I went to Buffalo and you hooked me up and fucking we get the fucking beat you know the mayor of Buffalo contacted me five years ago when I was at

Buffalo one of the last times I was at the casino oh okay the casino called me and they're like you have a call downstairs from such and such and I called there was some lady and she's like the man would like to speak to you no way yeah and they're like thank you for fucking talking about Buffalo like you do these fucking idiots that put ranch on their wings I want to shoot them all but you've restored that they were so happy put a bullet in your brain if you oh no she was like fucking idiots fucking ranch dressing fucking buffalo was built on blue cheese and you live by those standards thank god you know I'm old school my level you know I I went to Buffalo the first time in 84 and that was I fell in love with that city I've never met a person from Buffalo I didn't

like I love the people there I miss when I was in Boulder when I was in Boulder I had three or four friends that were from Buffalo and I couldn't believe how fucking crazy and real they were and then when I got locked up I was locked up with a couple brothers that were from Boulder and I couldn't believe how real they were like people from Buffalo they you know they're not going to have no skinny jean motherfuckers in Buffalo not the Buffalo I remember I still remember going to Buffalo to see Rick James yeah and I can't tell you what that was like you saw him in Buffalo too so that's I mean it must have been a small show white chicks with sperm breath you know because there was a ton of white chicks ready to suck Rick James's dick I never saw anything like that

most people sign up like after my shows they get online to take a picture not Rick James they got online to suck his dick that's it if you're a white chick with blonde hair you're sucking Uncle Rick's dick there's no me too there's no movies there's no script you know Rick just would slip your valium and then give you a breath mint afterwards you're dirty bitch you're paid 20 for the show I swear to god I went up there people were giving me pills in the audience it was I was 1984 I will never ever forget that I fell in love with Rick James in 78 with you and I go back with Rick James to the fucking first time I was just listening to Rick James the other night street street what's that I mean that street songs it is fucking brutal he did not fuck around Uncle Rick

I used to see him at the store Buffalo's best son he used to come to the store how many clubbers around Buffalo to show up to different places different venues and everything really before yeah he was up in like bars and do sets it was crazy like just do sing and shit like that and like people tell stories about it all the time you go to all the bars they talk about all Rick James has been in here you know they got his picture on the wall and shit they got autographs and shit he's graves in Buffalo have you been to his grave never never it's beautiful I got a buffalo I'm gonna go to his grave I met him at the company store I met him at the company store and I went up to him right Chewie introduced me to him the doorman I went up to Chewie I got to

meet Rick James and I don't want to meet nobody if you know anything about me I don't want to meet nobody but there was something about Rick James I had to tell him of course so I met him I shook his hand and I'm a big fan from you and I I told him all the albums I had I told him I saw him in 84 in Buffalo and I go let me tell you something when I first started comedy one of my best jokes was about you because when I started comedy in 91 maybe two years later was when he tied the chick up and burned it with a crack pipe and shit yeah I'm like Rick I gotta be honest to you the first good joke I wrote was about you I thought I don't remember the joke and I'm not gonna give it any justice it was like if if I picked a black superhero it would be like Rick James

because he burned me with a crack pipe that's never been done before you know it was so stupid maybe a blow torch I don't fucking know but he was very nice and then shortly after that he died maybe a year after that he died I never saw him at the store again but it was uh I think that was one of my biggest nights at the store meeting him he was great and he hooked up with Mooney afterward I remember that Mooney and him were talking Mooney and him were talking and Eddie Griffin he was good he was good to everybody so every time Paul Mooney would come to town to Buffalo he would have he would regale with stories with Rick James too like he would it'd be his favorite subject so you get to hear from him kind of like about a guy who came out of

Buffalo so it was fun every time he came to town rest in peace of course but uh rest in peace yeah both of them yeah of course both of them Josh Potter what are your plans buddy where can these people see you because you're a great man I'm sorry about what happened to you last year because I knew you had a lot of big things that were about to fucking blow up in your favor but you know what bro you didn't lose nothing no you're right and I and like you said I the perspective I uh you know I could have been way worse and I didn't lose a loved one or myself my own life for my health and anyway I didn't even get sick I didn't even get sick when I got the fucking second dose of that shit I didn't get any I'm you from Buffalo dog that that that fies that don't do dick to you you got

that fucking you got that blue cheese in you that's I think if you eat blue cheese you don't get COVID I really do because all my blue cheese friends didn't get COVID none of my Buffalo friends got COVID I checked with the one guy he's fine he's still selling cars you got any dates on the books anything I do I'm uh well I'm doing my podcast comes out every Tuesday just search the Josh Potter show on YouTube subscriber whatever but I got June 9th I'm gonna be in Tampa Florida at the Tampa improv and then the day after June 10th Orlando improv those are the two big ones so I hope I see people out at those you coming up to Jersey anytime soon or anything I could say hello I hope so I'd like to get up to the stress factory you know people keep asking like are you coming here and you come

in here and I'm telling them like I'm coming anywhere people booked me I told my guy who's booking my dates I said grind me into fucking dust like let's go so um hopefully I get to go everywhere and hopefully I'll be up to Jersey soon but these are the only two dates I have so far and I'm supposed to hear back I think in a couple of days here about some the rest of the summer in the fall so hopefully I'll have more coming soon here you start the fourth wall you're still doing spots around town stuff working that oh yeah I go to the fourth wall almost every other day noon one o'clock you know and then I'm getting some sets here and there now and other shows and the improv and you know the store's opening back up I'm hoping to work my way

into there too soon so it's a new era or whatever there so I'm hoping to hop aboard that train and see if I can get get some sets out that way too you know well if I could help you with Emily let me know if I could oh thank you thank you for you because I know you're a hard worker I know you've been at it for a while I still remember you and me and Buffalo eating tacos or something oh the donuts oh yeah the donuts the voodoo the first time you came the first time you came you brought the banana bread shit oh 2011 got that mailed over it was right after Yoshi like almost killed himself or whatever and uh I remember Ari telling me to like relax on it but I didn't listen and I remember I think that's where we bonded though because I ate so much of it and

I wasn't a piece of shit afterwards and then but the one morning you took me for donuts oh yeah the doughnuts the famous donut place up there that's uh we went to uh Paula's Paula's Paula's and they had like a cream donut and the fucking cream was sensational I fucking hate donuts but I love that you know I love yum yum donuts I'm not a Dunkin donut man they fucking suck these donuts in Jersey Paula's especially Paula's a fucking delicious Paula's uh oh you took me for donuts I was like that was I totally I go Lee I could ate 15 of them but I didn't want to be a fucking slob and for the Josh Potter I told Tom Seguri I ate fucking donuts I love you buddy I appreciate you coming on uh good luck to you if you need something with the comedy store let me know if I can help you

with Emily at all I'll put in a word for you to get you a showcase or at least a tape and uh I'm sorry you had these gigs taken away from you but let me tell you something you're a great young comic so and you're a great guy so it's gonna all come back to you brother tenfold you got my word thank you so much I love you for everything I means the world to me to get to come on that you're showing talk to you you know I love you and uh I miss you out here but you know I'm happy that things are going so well for you out there man you look good I'm glad you're starting to feel good you're being around people that you love so that's tremendous and congratulations on all that well I love you and let's stay in touch okay don't be a stranger cocksucker give my best

to buffalo blue cheese with wings and go fuck your mother of course I love you buddy thank you black thank you brother all right you fucking blood suckers I hope you enjoyed that fucking little tay-tay-tay with Josh Potter he's a good kid follow him on twitter don't forget his podcast drops every Tuesday and he's just like me that's me fucking 20 years ago trying to put the pieces together support support make somebody's day that's what this whole fucking movement has been about is making somebody's fucking day whether it's been the patreon or the podcast I never stopped because I know you guys you know I'm saying even if I come on here and I'm confused I still I'm thinking of you guys at all times so thank you very much for watching the show today

thank you for watching on Monday thank you for always having my back patreon the whole thing was still doing our thing and I love you cocksuckers when I get dates when I'm ready to fucking headline I will let patreon people know first and then so on and so forth but I could feel the it's coming so I'm happy about that and it's all because of you guys thank you very much and I'll see you next week now for a word from our sponsors and happy motherfucking memorial day all right I want to thank my man Josh Potter for coming on the podcast today but most importantly I want to thank you guys for supporting our podcast listening busting my balls giving me love whatever the fuck you're doing encouraging me on the guitar

or making me hit myself in the head with it whatever I'm happy you guys are here but before we leave I want to talk to you about our sponsors because we got the best sponsors in the business they start with cbd line listen the big craze right now in this country cbd I just went through a surgery and cbd line was there with me from a to z from the cream to the roll on to the surgical I mean listen cbd line is the best I always loved them but after my surgery I love them more you're asking me Joey I don't know much about cbd that's great neither did I how did I learn about it you stopped by going to cbdline.com read read the third party lab results read about the elements the treats read what cbd might work for you whether it's insomnia knee pain back pain

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did she went and got zip recruiter the same thing i'm telling you to do if you have a small business a large business i don't care whether you have three employees or three thousand employees zip recruiters for you so right now you can try zip recruiter for free Joey what are you talking about nothing is free free at zip recruiter dot com slash Joey again that zip recruiter dot com slash Joey try it for free just by going to zip recruiter dot com slash Joey zip recruiter is the smartest way to hire i want to thank zip recruiter i want to thank cbd lion but i want to thank you fucking savages for always having my back regardless so whether we do a zoom a loom a doom whatever the fuck we're doing we're trying here and i'm trying to put a smile on your face

i'm trying to turn that frown upside fucking down i love you cock suckers again i want to thank zip recruiter i want to thank cbd lion i want to thank fucking draft kings i want to thank who wasn't on monday uh the man scape shaved them nuts memorial days this weekend use code Joey and get 20 off i want to thank all my sponsors i want to thank you guys i love you guys don't forget go to draft kings sign up they send you an email every day that nobody else sees with different fucking little scams even if you can win yourself 50 bucks well you wouldn't take 50 bucks go fuck yourself i love you guys have a great weekend i love zip recruiter i love cbd lion i love you motherfuckers here we go see you monday cock suckers happy memorial day weekend be safe

so you