Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - 10/24/2012 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #21

Episode Date: October 26, 2012

Joey and Lee with guest Chucky from Joey's days playing basketball in North Bergen. Listen to fond out how to get into Madison Square Garden without a ticket. Recorded live on 10/24/2012

The church of what's happening now fucking full effect Wednesday October 24th a week away from Thanksgiving What's happening now fucking Yeah, something's going on what's going on we're good. We're good now everything. All right, what's happening there Lee? It's Wednesday a little fucking who bots today Joey Coco Diaz my man Lisa at the flying Jew is in full effect with his new little bond of his Collins hairdo Look at him. He's been polishing it in the morning. He's got a little girl on Twitter. He's a fucking savage He's gonna go to Boston. She's gonna lick his little fucking collumes He's looking at me. He's all giggly his face is red and stuff. It's a beautiful fucking day to be alive

Whatever the fuck you want to do you could do it Church of what's happening now full effect a week away from Thanksgiving. What are you gonna be for Halloween Lee? I'm not I'm nothing probably not working Halloween. What the fuck kind of player You supposed to be a sitting here last week telling me you got to be doing more with your life You know I'm gonna be out there gonna dress up like the flying Jew if I was you I'd get the strings to hold that high like some Chinese guy that's how to work Put a yama con and fly around the fucking city throwing pennies at cocksuckers, you know I'll let you do it. I can't dress up. Look at I haven't dressed up since I was 15

Fuck that shit last time I dressed up my mother died a week later. It's bad luck. You know, I can't have that shit I can't have it fuck it sons of anarchy last night The plot is tickling if Gemma is not the kiss of death this year. I don't know who the fuck is I know people gonna come back to me and say Joey spoiler where yellow fuck you cocksuckers watch it when it comes down I really seen the episode twice and I'm fucked up. I Seen the episode one and a half times I'm gonna laugh factory last night. There was 18 people out last night for that fact you fucking nine o'clock at night But I told my wife before I left that people ain't gonna spend a dime until they decide who the new president's gonna be

You don't like so not people you know, that's it This is the time of the year for the next two weeks people won't spend a dime until the next president gets elected It's over. It's over people just sitting here waiting now because they seem to last debate on Monday night See, that's like fucking all these Republicans and all these fucking wasps you see walking around they believe every word They're watching that thing going. Oh my god. What am I gonna do with my money and shit? Who am I gonna vote on so people all fucked up right now? They're all confused so we got next week people be walking around like momos and the following week they vote on Tuesday, correct? It's the sixth. I have no idea. What kind of American are you?

I mean, I can't vote I got felonies and I'm on top of all this shit You're a young man. Well, you got to get it together. You're not dressing up for Halloween You're not voting. What the fuck you should dress up like a Jew that's voting for Obama on Halloween That's almost all the Jews. That's not really dressing up a Jew dressing up like they're voting for Romney is a Jew dressing up Fuckin Romney with his little hairdo and shit. I love I love milk Jesus Christ that dude beside that. What else anyway? What else is going on Lisa at fucking Carlton fist? Got a DUI you guys are saying Joey. Who's Carlton fist? What's it got to do with my fucking world? This is a church of what's happening now Carlton fist hit one of the greatest home runs and baseball history when I was in

The sixth or seventh grade the Cincinnati Reds played the Boston Red Sox and let me tell you something I grew up a Cincinnati red fan, but my second favorite team was the Red Sox I was like a closet Red Sox fan and I told you about Louis Tiantile the fucking Cubans and this is all that series This is a beautiful series and in game six or in game five Fuckin Carlton fist hit a home run in like the 12th inning I mean, I don't even know what fucking anything it was that my head almost blew up because my mother was a Red Sox fan And let me explain some to you where Cuban baseball is everything So if my mother would have won the World Series that year with the Boston Red Sox, I would have never heard the end

Would have been red, you know I'm saying she would have bought me ten dozen red Sox She would have broke my balls, but even though I was betting against The Red Sox when Carlton fist hit the home run I had tears in my eyes when I still watch it today because put them put the motherfucking home run only show these people How we do it here? We ain't fucking around here Under a full moon at Fenway Park the whole country stayed up past midnight to see possibly the most exciting World Series game ever played that's right Boston's Carlton fist climaxed game six against Cincinnati. You see that

12th fucking inning cocks up the past midnight half of you's had your pajamas on you think I was sleeping fuck No, I was asleep. I was asleep at one eye open watching this fucking game praying Oh You never there was no security then there was no TSA There was none of those fucking momos if somebody hit a home run You wanted to run out in the field and tackle them You took your chances in those days and somebody tackled them right by the third baseline Somebody grabbed them if you get a chance hit go to YouTube and watch Carlton fist

1977 home run or 76 whatever the fuck it is. I'm not good with 75 whatever the fuck it is You know I'm dates my man F runs here from sticking me came to visit us this morning I didn't hear from us. We should knock on the door at eight after fucking five. I had to go get the fucking gun I didn't know who the hell it was because I had just spoken to Lee and Lee goes. I'll be there 530 or something I'm in the bathroom. I'm about to take a shit of debt and the door bangs and I go what the fuck I bought them. I see this little fucking effing's head. I'm like, oh, Jesus. You got to come back. I'm not ready for It's too early. I haven't even cleaned the cat litter box. It smells like ten dead fucking cats in here And that's it. Lee. It's fucking Wednesday nine weeks away from Christmas seven weeks away from Hanukkah

What have you fucking done cocksuckers? What have you done anything? Did you get up? Did you go out there mug somebody? Huh anything everybody's crying. I got no work and this is the time of the year We got to go to work, you know shoplifting season starts in about six weeks The day after Thanksgiving shoplifters come out and fucking with long jackets and big hats and they try to shoplift It's a beautiful fucking thing. That's what I love about the holidays people let themselves go You know I was big into that when I was a little kid shoplifting But nothing big like I would go to the stores and try to pick up like a little I like the biggest thing I stole was a like second season of house on DVD and I was like the most nervous I've ever been

I can't imagine you I gave you a hit of hash your head almost blew up your face got red Your eyes were spinning like a fucking casino machine. You were a shoplifter Lee at one time nothing nothing huge like little little I remember there used to be a store called It was a fucking music store strawberries I think or something like that and they had little little IDs like like the best like like Female booting inspector IDs and those goofy things and I would go in and steal it like it wasn't that big Ten oh, yeah, okay That's when you get away with it like I would I would get really nervous as I stepped over the boundary for the

For the out of the store like I get really nervous. Oh, I fucking kill you. Yeah, I still shoplift just lightest though Every once in a while one of those Hindus is looking around at 7-eleven I clip them for a fucking light I love it. Oh, they put like a lighter right there and you shoplift in front of people You don't fuck or walk around. Oh, that's right I shop right in front of people I usually take the fucking lighter and keep it in my hand and then when I go to get my cash to pay for that I got the lighter and I give him the tent and he looks at me all confused one guy on curse on told me to take my hand Out of my pocket. Let me see what's in my pocket. I don't suck my

But I broke my own record one year. I used to steal the NFL lightest I'm a klepto in heat and I used to fucking this is about ten years ago. I had a hat asked my wife I had a hat filled with fucking football lightest I had any every NFL team like eight times. I need like three fucking teams. They wouldn't make them I need like the diners, you know, the Minnesota Vikings. I need like the Texans or something like that So every day I finally went in just stole a fucking rack. I had more I stole more fucking lightest and that curse on 7-eleven They used to put camel cigarettes out and I used to steal the camel cigarettes. This is till 10 years ago

It keeps me sharp when you're shoplifting keeps a guy like me sharp, you know, I'm saying so now I don't do it I I get scared I used to shop with at the airport, but it's bad fucking car Oh, yeah, because I ain't paying eight dollars for those fucking disgusting sandwiches So when I used to travel as a young comic and I wouldn't have enough money I would just shop with all the shit at the fucking airport They want three dollars for a newspaper at the fucking airport for a New York paper You put that right under your arm and you walk out of the fucking place. I ain't paying three dollars for no fucking news paper But shoplifting is bad karma. So that's why you gotta stop because did you ever get nervous or didn't like that?

That was like the lowest thing you did so didn't like baller. You know, I mean you always get nervous your heartbeat You're always gonna stay on top because that's when you get caught Okay on those little things you follow me You think you go in there just to shop with something I gotta catch it Like the time me and Ray when I robbed the gas station and we went to rob a fake fucking plastic gun from the Super Mario I got caught robbing the fucking gun I wasn't thinking about it because I like a gorilla walked in there just took the water pistol and thought I was gonna walk out of the Store, uh-uh, they just fucking had me and I had to cry my way out of it and shit

Tell them that I was supporting the home and I had six missing brothers and shit and they let me go But did you ever cheat in school? I cheated in school a couple times Like I caught once on a big one and that was like the most nervous I've ever been I had a we had a test and it was on the book I had the book under my shirt and the teacher saw me do it And when I stood up from the desk the book I caught under the desk and it like it Extended like it pulled out from my shirt and they saw it and even nothing really happened But it was a you lose face when you cheat you lose face if you get caught

It's like doing steroids and trying to fist fight on a fucking Saturday. You lose face I don't know we used to have my buddy lubes who was really smart. We used to erase his answers Well look over his paper shit like that, you know, I never really liked cheating school I don't know why I never really dug it too much. I tried you put your hand you put your fucking Oh, yeah, I wrote on my hand spelling on your hand and shit after a while You're like what the fuck if I just don't watch TV at night for now when I go over my words I get this shit, you know, I like school man. I never had a problem never had a problem in school Never when I had a quit school my junior year broke my heart

I had a quit school because my mother died. I had to get a fucking job It killed me because school came easy for me. A lot of people have a hard time in school School is as hard as you make it if you take the notes if you listen in class and you take those fucking notes home at night You review them because what kills you is when you have those end of the fucking season exams Yeah, and you got to go back and learn about the Cuma Limba's clouds Clouds, you know, I don't give a fuck about clouds, you know, I'm saying they got no five fucking different clouds You know, that's what kills you But if you stay on top it throughout the whole semester by the time you get to the end, it's not cramming

You're not fucking cramming. You're just reviewing. It's it's easy. I just for some reason. I Cut right through it. It was the weed and the older I got the better. I got at it Oh, I got worse at it. No, I got the better I got I have a good memory So I would never take notes and I and I would do the homer up a barely and I would always get a B or something and if I ever If I even tried I would get an A or a good grade But I just for that stuff when I don't when I think something's boring. I don't really I don't really work It's all fucking boring, but the way I put it look at I got left back in the sixth grade

Not because I was retarded, but because I fell in love with some chick I really did the pussy got me going crazy and I had to go to some school and I wouldn't even go to summer school I would stalk the girl and eat a little monkey every fucking day and then and I failed out But that experience got me so fucking embarrassed It made me so fucking embarrassed plus I didn't tell my mom So I couldn't have my mom come back to the school So I had to do fucking good in school and that's how I figured it out the second time around the seventh grade I really figured it out that this isn't as hard as I make it. Yeah, if you neglect it

It's like anything else man, you know, you got to write every fucking day I got to write comedy every day or a book every day or something when I don't write for three or four days It gets that much harder. Yeah, so even if I write two sentences a day, you know They tell you that for a book, it's a page a fucking day That's what you should be writing But there's days if I don't write for two or three days because I'm busy I could feel it when I go back So now I always try to write something every day Even if it's just a sentence the guy I write with Omar the editor he tells me even if you just write a sentence

But your mind is still not direction the same thing happens with school, you know, yeah college dog I was going to be a fucking attorney Which is you got to be on top of your homework. Yeah have to be on top of reading and my comprehension sucks balls Like I have no comprehension whatsoever. I got to read tweets eight fucking times two sentences But I have no comprehension because as I'm reading I'm thinking about you know Going to fucking 7-Eleven and shoplifting alive. I'm not thinking about what's fucking important here So that's what happened the other thing I got I got to change the subject real quick spoiler alert spoiler alert The only good thing about last night on sons of Anakin

There was a great episode last night, but they beat the fuck out of Joe Mikhail and I can't tell you he didn't fucking He had it coming to him because I watched that show and that show blows I haven't laughed at all and I like Joe Mikhail and stuff and he's great on community, but that talk soup I know a lot of fucking youngsters watch that show put a gun in your fucking head I've watched it 18 times and I'm sat there going somebody make me laugh He's worked hard on that fucking headpiece and nobody's fucking laughing I'll tell you what Jimmy Smith threw a tremendous beat on him last night, and I got nothing against Joe Mikhail I think he's a nice guy. He's very sweet

I just never thought talk soup was fucking that funny and I would sit there for hours or wait for fucking something to happen And nothing fucking happens. So for you people who laugh at that shit shoot yourself You fucking momos. I don't know what the fuck half of these people are laughing. I don't even know why they laugh at me I'm just a fat fuck that's stupid night. I look like I got hit in the head with 15 fucking axes or some shit like that Today my good friend is calling up and listen Let me tell you something about the guests who call this show cocksucker. These are not professional guests These guys are not fucking comics these guys are street guys What happened the other day with Chris Gaynor was Chris Gaynor is a great guy

I grew up with Chris me and Chris didn't really run together We ran together and as a whole but Chris is a nice kitty grip to become a cop You think Chris was out there mugging fags with me and fucking going to the city and getting eight balls So when these people call up sometimes they don't really fucking know they're not you know They're not hip like fucking leader. They can talk on a dime. These guys are fucking regular street people So please work with them cocksuckers. They're beautiful people. They're helping me out They call enough today. I got a kid chucking me bring calling up that I've known Chuckie Since the seventh grade problem seven sixth grade before I got left back

He was always short, but he played the fuck out of basketball and today he's a coach you'll let you know where he's a coach at war college and Me and Chuckie were bad. Like I said, I was a sports geek I'm a sports geek when I was a kid, you know, and I used to follow teams But I never liked really like I'll tell you what like Phil Jackson Phil Jackson turned out to be a phenomenal coach What a bunch of championships in Chicago. What a bunch of championships in the Lakers He was the worst fucking player ever for the next All right, whatever they fulfilled Phil Jackson was the sixth man and he was really skinny

He had these needle shoulders and whenever we were not in the sixth seventh grade me and why deal Donald another friend to Chuckie We bet games and we watched the nick games and talk on the phone while they were going on Okay, and we bet like 10 bucks 15 bucks 20 bucks was like a lot in those days and once they put Phil Jackson We just hang up. We got you going to bed. I'm going to bed They put Phil Jackson in Phil Jackson went out to become one of the best fucking coaches of all time But these are the guys we used to watch me and Chuck used to go to booze basketball camp with the five-star basketball camp with the Willis Reed basketball camp that was our fucking life, you know, so I kept in charge and I always kept in touch with Chuckie McBreen because he was always a good friend growing up and

He we played a he played for our lady of Fatima and I played for st. Michaels in Union City And one time we were playing him, you know what the rate is with the with the Texans What's that team the New Orleans Saints did well You had to go out there and fucking kill somebody and they give you a bonus Let me tell you how good let me tell you how good of a shot Chuckie had the coach at our team said here's the deal If you block his shot, I'll buy your lunch, but if you block his shot and take him out of the fucking game I'll give you a hundred bucks. That's how good of a basketball player Chuckie was when we were kids So and he was a short guy. He was a short guy

He would pop him from fucking 40 and he had a brother had a fucked up elbow. Yeah, sir Just we call him banana bone. He always you know, he's elbow you with that little thing He was terrible, but he was Chuckie's brother, so it was like what are you gonna do with fucking the terrible one So he always tried to live up to Chuckie and then he had a go to st. Joe's it was a fucking nightmare Now he's a cop and he got hit in the head So he's our disability came out here to visit me with the mother and not not Chuckie, but his brother We all his name is I forget Bruce, but we called him Freddie free doesn't he played basketball?

He free he played like Lloyd free, but he was crazy So we call him Freddie free and he would lose his fucking mind and he hung out with this other kid That was half Puerto Rican half black and half French. His name was figgy That kid caught more beatings than anybody ever seen in my life He was the toughest kid ever peep I was I don't beat him up. Everybody beat figgy up I even think I threw him down the fucking park stairs one time because he just got on everybody's nerves He was half a fucking something so nobody really done What are you gonna do?

But this is the shit I got to live with this is what I got to fucking live with you understand me I want to give a couple shot outs today. Oh, my man Mitch Nutter He's got a hiding from his wife. He's got a podcast I want to give a shout-out to the guitar set in Memphis I want to thank the people for making testicle testaments number one yesterday on Night tunes. It's back to being number two where I belong But for a little time I was at number one because that's how we roll the fucking vapor pen is on fire today Like Madonna's ass hole in 84

Now I know why we do the podcast so early because when we did it later on Monday You had the vapor pen for a couple hours and it was in you were stoned. Oh, I was drooling You know it's 65% THC in this motherfucking pen. We just had those guys on being the beast. This is Eureka vapor I haven't been smoking reefer lately. I just been hit the vape. I smoked it Ari yesterday He rolled the bone. I took the grade 12, but besides I don't smoke bottom I'm trying to condense the fucking lungs. This vape is tremendous. Can you notice a difference with now that you're not smoking? Yeah, I was smoking an eighth a day. I'm hitting bond. I do how to throw the bong away and everything You see no other bong broke an eighth a day Jesus and that's the shit that Kelly smoke when his head blew off

I ain't smoking that Susquehanna fucking weed. I'm so I go into these stores. I look them in the eye and I tell the motherfuckers I want would what fucking Satan would smoke if he came in if Jesus came in here right now I said listen, I haven't seen Satan in 20 years. It's time I'll that's what I want to smoke and you can't say that like if you go to the stores in Hollywood Like there's a store in Formosa. That's like the gayest waspiest store of all time Everybody goes in there with sandals into France and they're all cool and shit and they go in there like yes I'm high. I like to get medicated something that Will not get me that tired. Just smoke the fucking thing

Better yet by the way you talk and just go suck a dick because that's your best fucking bet Hopefully you'll get your high. That's your best bet. You want to go into these stores and go look I'm paying 20 fucking bucks for a gram I want push my fucking head back, you know, I want what was that commercial in the bathtub? But take me away cow gone. That's what I want to do And now they got all these names when I was a kid you just smoke debt That's it for 30 years. I've been in this country smoke fucking debt now They want to smoke well

I smoke sativa and I smoke an indica blend stop it Grab the cock and stick it up your ass and end of the ready. You're acting like a fucking Momo You smoke whatever the fuck they give you they got it. Well The sativa you smoke in the morning because it get the fuck out of here The sativa don't even work after fucking one o'clock. It's momo fucking weed again Hope makes you think and get the fuck out of here. I'll go over there right now I'll go over the divine wellness right now and get the church the one they grow out of respect for the church Or what's happening now for motherfuckers that like to see the devil a couple times a day that thing is like 30%

You fucking dry that you think people go in there and say I want I'm going over the divine wellness to see the church Or they have something else white debt to something like that. It's called you go in there You see those two weeds at both $18 and you're like, that's what I want. I don't get nothing else Well, the best is when you go buy weed from a girl in Hollywood Don't think all the taste listen bitch if I want taste I get lifesavers I don't give a fucking a taste like a black chicks fucking asshole before she fought in Lee's face if it takes me to the next level That's what I'm smoking. That's what I'm smoking dog What do I you know they make such a big deal like they're doing something better everybody got good weed in this country

You know some better than others you got Mexican brown weed. Let me tell you some I smoke some brown weed in Philadelphia one time I was high for 12 fucking hours So you don't know what the fuck you're getting so don't be surprised the other day though on 60 minutes for you people watch 60 minutes I've been watching 60 minutes because like I said yesterday I watched 60 minutes and I watch HBO sports You asked me why and I'll tell you why fucking Lee because HBO sports always does a great job Whatever the fuck they they could show you see the episode about the Indian fucking camel jockeys Star the kids in India. It was the most interesting thing. I ever saw in my life

What was the last time you watch? What's that Bill Maher that show with him at night? Never and it's fucking interesting. That's why I learned my politics I don't watch the news to learn all that shit and I watch 60 minutes because it cuts the bullshit at 6 o'clock every night Yeah, 6 30. I watch what's the name not Diane Sawyer. That's my fucking girl But she always starts with some bullshit then they show you some blind kid that can play the drums at the end So they go from fucking killing motherfuckers to like the story of the day five black kids in Chicago yesterday about that That they're overcoming fear. Did you want you don't watch the news? Don't you don't watch world news tonight after nobody watches fucking world news tonight?

I'm the only momo that watches that but anyway back to 60 minutes I'm watching 60 minutes the other day. They had a story by the vice president that left Goldman Sachs and they had another story about Steven Spielberg making Lincoln. That's what I need Spielberg fucking Lincoln It's 2013 you want to make a movie everybody's waiting for Martians in two months now I got to go fucking watching movie about Abe Lincoln. It's the movie's 85 fucking years too late. Okay. It doesn't even look that good I saw the trailer. Oh, they just weigh you out and what is Tom Hanks in it again? How many more movies are they gonna put fucking Tom Hanks in how many more movies? How much longer do I got to see this fucking guy walking around?

Nobody wants a team after Larry crown. I almost shot my fucking cell and I love Tom Hanks. I loved him in fucking splash I loved him in Philadelphia But I banned him because he won the osc and he cried like a pussy at the Oscars There's no crying at the fucking Oscars if Marlon Brando didn't cry you can't fucking cry either So we got that we got uh, uh, the one with baseball. He was brilliant in that You know, but as you could see old the oldest getting his head looks fucked up You know and I met with Tom Hanks after the longest Yeah, he's a great guy, but if you see him as he's getting older his head looks all fucked up

He's got that dick Clark type fucking head. You know that he's scared to fuck out of me the last two new years ago They had dick Clark. I smoked some dope. I put tv on dick Clark almost scared the fuck out of me fuck sinister And a nightmare on elm street his head was all fucked up Look at Tom Hanks his head. You think my face is fucked up. Look at his head and his son the one that was on dex That's an ugly little motherfucker too that little big headed fuck He was at the podcast festival doing a podcast for what your father's Tom Hanks jack off Stay home and smoke dope and get your dick sucked. He's at the podcast festival hanging out with a bunch of waspy motherfuckers Looking at each other with oh shit. We got the call of the day ring it

sucky fucky chucky What's up my man? How we doing? You know me dog trying to put two and two together here Of the church of what's happening now. I got the flying julees. I at the studio. How are you today my friend? I'm doing good as always. I know you're a bad motherfucker. What's going on chuck? Tell me something good in your world What's been going on lately? Just get ready for the season, you know, I've been here this time in the year's basketball time Everybody takes his baseball football. I could give a fuck less about either one of those fucking sports I'm worried about basketball right now. And when do you when is your season start?

Well, we started practice october 15th We had midnight matters on october 14th And then we get officially started on november 17th our first real game Currently we're ranked number 17 in the country. That's my boy chucky mac But you know why chucky mac because you've been playing basketball Since before you had hair in your asshole You've been playing basketball since you were five you got to turn me on to the hoop Chuckie had a fucking dirt basketball court in his backyard. Never mind concrete

It was dirt every once in a while you bounced a ball in a rock ricochet and hit you in the fucking head But how dirty would we get back there chuckie? We'd be covered with dust when we're done But we had some good times because after when we could jump in the pool right in the fucking pool And I figured out I figured out all the spots in that court where not to go Especially if you don't want to fall down the freaking steps. Oh my god We used to fucking play till we used to turn the lights on back there and your mob would make kool-aid for us It was a fucking it was a party and we had freddy free to deal with

To deal with that cock suckers that was a nightmare We that was his brother his name was bruce a sweetheart of a guy But he had like a little thing with his elbow. We used to call him banana bone. He loses fucking mind But we love them to death He'd show up with figgy the fucking Puerto Rican french guy Figgie Figgie lived about four dollars away. What a train wreck that cock suckers Oh figure-rowing chuck. What was his real name? What was his real name? It was figgy, but we His real name was Raymond Figgarola. Raymond Figgie. That's right

Chuck I always tell these guys the story about the eighth grade when we had a walley lindsey as our teacher in the eighth grade He was the mayor of we hawking You know the town when you pull out and to the Lincoln tunnel in the Sopranos that first town He goes around when he comes out of tunnel That's we hawk in New Jersey and our teacher was a mayor and we hawk him But he was an eighth grade teacher McKinley because he replaced somebody correct Yes, he did I don't remember off the top of my head. That's what happens when you get old You can't remember shit anymore, but fucking uh, we had

That's a great And he's the one who got our basketball program rolling by hiring fucking turk jordan Right. This is the one guy we want to talk about You know when you're a mayor you dress you have like these guys that hang out with you and they wear suits and they're very nice people He had those but he had this one guy in a black leather jacket in a bad to pay remember how bad his fucking wig was That to pay was terrible later on in life when you were out in LA He took that shit off of one ball, but he should have took that shit off when he was coaching us What was the last time you saw turk jordan that night or no you saw him after that?

No, I see I saw turk after that, you know after high school. I saw turk. I mean, I haven't seen turk now Uh, at least 20 25 years, but you know, I saw him after after we graduated high school Probably even after I got out of college. I think I saw did he still have the wig? No, no, I cut that point. He had it off still crazy is a motherfucker though That guy is one of the craziest individuals He used to play ball every time he would shoot from half court. He would yell out world be free Fucking god was out of his mind, but that's right. Yeah, that's motivated I think god is motivated to feel we were fucking scared shit of him. We were he was fucking scary, man

Now were you guys on the same team when barone was your coach? Barone was our teacher barone came in high school. Oh, I thought he said he can't coach you guys, okay Barone taught us plays in the eighth grade. We needed a coach really bad. We Somebody quit remember renais franc's brother quit. He caught me uh closed that door for a second little brother He caught me a finger banging the sister on his balcony renais franc. Remember he hated spits and niggers and jews He hated everybody remember the fireman we had for a while. You know what i'm talking about, right? Who's that remember we had a coach went first we had the guy with the long hair that could slam dunk Pete where he had no teeth

Then he quit Yeah, he quit then then we had franc george franc george frank was a fireman in north bergen a real chubby built guy Yeah, right by line at a fuel george frank. He fucking hated he hated spanish people. He hated fucking everybody Fuck you dirty service. That's right But you know what like I always tell people if you're gonna be a racist you better not have a sister Because I started dating the sister I ate her pussy behind mckinley and shit one night after one of those holy rosary games Because remember holy rosary you remember this shit

I banged her and I ate her monkey second and she was a virgin So I had blood all over my face and I went home my mother's like who'd you fuck around with the wolf man? I had blood all over my face. I died fucking pubes But then one night I was fingering her in her balcony and her fucking father came out and caught me and my hand Was in her pants and she was never allowed to hang out with us no more. They put her like a military school They fucking put a belt on her But then we got turk jordan Remember then we got turk and then we got turk

And we wanted to go to the sixer game at the garden the sixes were playing the fucking nicks on christmas day Chuckie take it from here Yeah, well how the story goes is turk jordan Coco and I were two the two best players on the team and we changed this program around from a program that was losing When turk came all of a sudden I think we went like five and three or something our last year With mckinley, but turk took a liking to two of us because we're the best two players So we invited us to go to the 76er nick game at christmas in the garden But the game was so sold out

And unbeknownst to both us we had no tickets So we get over to garden and we got no money. We got no tickets. So we said to this guy What are we gonna do and all he said just do whatever I do or follow me and stay close So the the line in the garden is packed. We're waiting. I mean long time walking up the line We finally get through the front to the ticket guy and he knocks the usher down right on his ass And there's a stairwell right to the left in the garden where we come through the doors And if we take off up these stairs and what are you okay to seven or eight grade this guy flying ass up the stairs We're fucking kids

Hey, Coco ain't no thin fucking little chubby at that time. So I'm a quick little fucker I'm trying to stay with him. You were down to stay well behind me Try to get him while we finally get in and get to the inside of the place and fucking now we got no seats So He finds an empty area for three seats and we get seated And we're enjoying this nickname and then everybody's walking back and forth Coming over the top of us trying to get out in the aisle and get to that concession there And he starts killing people yelling at people at all. He tells them the next time you fucking she go to the fucking

YMCA to get more exercise. I'll never forget that over the top of me I'll never fuck Now These aren't our tickets We're just mackin on tickets people are in their real tickets walking past us and he's telling people the next time you fucking get up I'll fucking kill you That's how crazy this guy was and being chucky and looking at each other with tears in our eyes

Because this is not what we wanted. We just wanted a bad. We just wanted to go to a basketball game. That was it And how did the game end? Basketball and Chuckie's a lot to see a better mix of sixes That's all we wanted to do. So now it's halftime and he leaves us Me and Chuckie are sitting there by ourselves up in the fucking nosebleeds and he comes back and he goes But he comes back and he goes I got your tickets. Let's go And he took us down to the floor and that's where the party really started. Tell him chuggy It was crazy on the floor

He's got that's not a game a hundred times is not a game and shit and he's fucking argue with fucking coaches players Everything I even started he was on the front page of sports illustrated because his guy had bet so much money on games He would go to games and fucking run out on the court and everything He's out of his mind the rumor was he smacked red oil back in the face and went to jail for two years That was the fucking rumor about turd Jordan like that. He was known for that. He was in the cover of sports illustrated Like this is the guy who took us to a basketball game I don't even I was a coach. No, he wasn't he coached us part time Like something happened like he couldn't coach us because he probably had felonies or he had raped somebody or some shit

But this is the guy they entrusted and he was chucked. How lucky were we? It's not like we were around molesters or nothing in those days. There was no molesters. We fucking kill you No, that's fucking guy I think that's why we're fucking as crazy as we fucking are the other fucking people like that every day where we came from That was the norm You have people like malzano killing people you attend Jordan's scare the shit out of people It was fucking crazy But then at the end of the game we're sitting there

Some guy told him to move and tap them on the shoulder and he grabbed the guy's hands And squeezed it in front of us and turn. You know when people turn your wrist That's what he did to this guy. It was one of those games where I shit my brains out the whole time But chucky and I asked chucky about this yesterday that he told us if we had a winning season He was gonna get us laid I don't know we'll get laid memes at the time Need to chucky we weren't even into girls. We were into basketball 38th street park We were into just basketball

We had a couple girls in the neighborhood lucy snobush and we had fucking, you know lisa massina and whatever Used to date lucy snobush. Did you not or no? That's correct. That's correct. That's true star lucy snobush a fine piece of ass Lucy snobush was a fine piece of ass But to make the Good times we had good times with that with all the people we hung out over there. We had some great stories of some great times I'm gonna try to get sabatino on the show I got his number from veniri the other day, but I'll never forget that at the end of the

I didn't graduate the eighth grade remember because I went to uh, uh five star that year Do you remember that that we had a lot of snow that year? So school got pushed back to like the end of june and I had already paid for five star But when I got back from five star that day, we're all on the courts like me sabatino michael specie al dominant before he died It was sitting on the court and the car pulls up and it's turk jordan and he comes out of the car and he's got this chick with him Because he always asked us if we got laid or whatever. I didn't know what the fuck he was talking about And he has this chick with him chuck

Now how old was turk when this was going down maybe 30? Do you think maybe a little bit large yeah, yeah 35 maybe 40 he shows up with this chick that had to be like 55 With the organic tits uglier than death He picked her up at some bar and we hawk and I don't know if you've checked lately there's no beauty queens out of fucking we hawking all right and uh He shows up he walks over to the court and we're sitting there He's like guys you ready to get some pussy and we're like pussy. What are you talking about? And he tells the chick to pull her shirt up to show her tits

And she's got like cigarette burns on her tits somebody stabbed her on the tip And I'll never forget that we looked at each other with tears in our eyes Like he's like all right, who's first you could fuck her in the car. We're in the eighth grade We're going to be fresh here And he's like who's gonna fuck her first and we all looked at each other. We're like we gotta go home, dog We gotta go home. Holy shit. That's my mom calling me. That's the last time I saw turk join and let me tell you something Let's say that lady would have sucked all our dicks and let our assholes on fire We wouldn't have said a word to our parents and my lying chuck look like these little faggots today

They got a blowjob in high school when they run home and tell mommy We wouldn't have said one word we would have died with that story Oh, I remember having miss brando in the sixth grade in mckinley and getting her in the closet squeezing the titties when she was pregnant That's how fucking crazy None of this none of this brando she's still around and I've guaranteed this brando still fucking polish at home She became a vice-principal I seen her at 94. I'm like was brando. Let me squeeze your titties. She's like stop it I used to squeeze her titties in the sixth grade in the closet when she was the art teacher She was pregnant. LaVito's class. You know me dog. I've always been a little freak. I don't fuck around

Wait Did she let you or did you do it? She thought it was like a joke She was like, it's like a joke. Oh, he's so sweet. I would squeeze those big fat fucking pregnant titties. I didn't give a fuck And then I had her in high school for art and I would torment the miss brando. Let me eat your ass stop at cocoa You're so cute. I would get fucked up I would go and get fucked up before school in the back of my mind I'm going to go get a booty call from miss brando third period like this brando was going to suck my little

Cuban dick in the third grade in the third period of school. That's how crazy we were chuck I know you a long fucking time man a long fucking time. I laugh all the chuck is what a nice kid I grew up to become an animal chuck is a christian nice little boy. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, not not always man. He comes to me on the on the basketball court when he gets pissed me off. I ain't that nice Hey, what about what about all the great times we get out on the bulldog bus come and hold every day after practice And fucking holding that bus feeling like we were the only ones out there Fucking people will just get off each stop too soon because they can't get anymore You remember those times chuck, let me tell you something a lot of times I tell people I lie to people

Because I tell people I started comedy when I got locked up But between you and me that's when the beginning of my comedy career was was on that number one bus Because we were without a doubt. I would get on that bus and we'd sing the oscami The oscar madison song we do the odd couple first And then we do scenes from the honeymooners And then we'd start torturing anybody who was on heroin and sleep on the bus drooling We tortured them. I've told the stories and we had to go by lincoln school with the but with the windows open on the fucking bus And people throw snowballs at the buses. We tormented that bus driver the number one bus driver

We thought meant to gain it add gain around the phone on monday We're talking about freshman practice of mr. Reardon. How much that motherfucker should make us run sprints Yeah Fuck and I still see weird and he's the woman's coach at no bergen Uh, he coached the lost the girls and I still see him. He lives on not far from me and harrickton park So I see dandy every once in a while. I can't believe that he's still coaching You know and he had us back in In one of the 79 80 whenever he coached us back then and he's still coaching

And he's still drinking getting remember he used to fuck that one teacher. That was cute miss serda She was friends with jenna jacobo We had some fucking good times down there chuckie We had some good times in the fucking neighborhood down there. Remember nitty carnelly's mother How good looking she used to be I tried to fuck her one night too when I was like 15 Remember she used to walk across the dog. She had the french poodle that was blind I mean it was fey fey right fey cardnelly. That's right fey cardnelly She used to come out with her hot pants and we used to go fucking bananas over down the basketball court

It's her daughter the one Kathy she's still alive well No, kathy died kathy and deedy deedy's married to bobby bendon kathy died She uh, they found her in a car dead. God bless her. So it was a fucking we lost a lot of people down there We had just the two we ran what we ran with little anthony and we ran with domic I still talked to domic sister She's gonna call in on the show in a few weeks for for a woman's perspective Yeah, vita I still talked to her so it's really interesting. I still I still talk to all you motherfuckers, bro You guys keep me grounded. I'm surrounded by these fucking waspy fucks

That don't have no word to them. So I gotta call you guys you guys Keep me grounded. You know, I was just telling my man effort from stickum the people I'm surrounded without here You know, you get these people that they just talk chuck They just fucking talk and they don't come through on anything, you know, and Where I came from your word was everything, you know, when you talk to somebody that was everything Here I got nothing these people talk on a monday and by wednesday they're on to their next fucking mind fuck, but uh You know, I learned a lot hanging out with you down there and I grew up at your house Chuck your mom came out here and I hung out with your mom and bruce and uh, it's an honor to still have you in my life, you know

It really is Yes Glenn country and fucking We had the best team in the league and we were so focused on killing chucky that he fucking killed us It was amazing and steve rubinaccio I mean, that's my real first taste of hollywood because steve rubinaccio was a camera man on On fucking days of our lives or something remember that shit Yeah, you know, I still talk to him he wraps he wraps um college basketball in our league on the woman's side

And he also still wraps high school basketball So in fact last year I bumped into him at a cave and he asked me do I still still speak to daddy and why and why And I said yes, and he asked me to get on their number You wanted to reach out for them. So I got him a number and I believe he reached out for daddy already Well, give him my best. I always love steve rubinaccio and steve a charty. I love those guys one last thing I got to talk to you about because we didn't grow up racist, you know, not at all. I mean, uh, you're irish. I'm cuban Not where we're from but remember when when louis hinandez first moved to our neighborhood Louis hinandez was dominican and he was dark skin. So we used to call him louis the nigger just out of principle

We called him louis the nigger. I mean, it was and he wasn't even black He was dominican, but they didn't care and we used to blow shotguns in his afro. Do you remember that behind the fuck? We used to blow shotguns in his afro behind the pool And he would all take like mescaline or smoke pot and drink And we he would let us blow the pot smoke in his afro and like ten minutes later the smoke would come out of his afro We thought that was the coolest thing in the world. I love louis hinandez You know, I talked to him from time to time david ruiz and all those guys. They're all down in florida in jersey You know, whenever I go to north, but whenever I go home louis always gets a hold of me

I used to meet him at hashways But I haven't seen him in about four years and david ruiz called me about once a year To say hello, uh, I think he's in miami somewhere But you know what man, I always love hearing from you guys As you know, chuck, I try to call you as much as I can and I wish I talked to whitey a lot more I got a picture of whitey on my wall from when I seen him five years ago and I love you guys chuck I always have and uh, thank you for being part of my memories

I've got one more thing to ask you to remember this story. We were up at schutz and park in the soccer field It was down to check you and a bunch of guys and I don't know if you remember this story But I've never smoked pot in my life and those guys held me down Everybody had me down And you had the joint and back check was trying to force me to smoke it And you said under no circumstances. He's clean. He don't want him. He don't want it. We I'm not giving him the joint Do you remember that time? No, I don't Yeah, it's a true story is is you had the joint back in the day up at schutz and park

You know where that overhang was where we used to hang up And and all up there that dirty fucking dirt soccer field And and and use a smoking pot and fucking I wouldn't smoke it in a pen and back I got me pinned down with a couple other people and I don't remember because David Phelps there was a bunch of all And at the end of the day you had to join it wouldn't wouldn't fucking make me smoke it. Well, you know me dog There's fucking character. I'm a fucking douchebag, but I still had character back then. So you were a good friend

You were a good friend So I know you didn't want to get high and I'm not wasting pot smoke on something. You don't want to get fucking high, you know Hey to this day, I still never tried it in my life I might have drank a fucking little bit in my lifetime, but I never tried that shit No, I'm happy you didn't man because you turned out to be a good man and you're coaching. I'm proud of you I'm fucking proud of you. I can't believe you're on the phone with me chuck And I'm happy that you called and uh, I'm sure the listeners are gonna love you man. Thank you very much for helping me out Chuckie. I love you at all my heart. I love your family growing up

Anytime man. All right, brother. I'll give you a call next week. Thank you again chuck Stay well. You got it. Stay black, baby All right. Bye. Bye. Bye Yeah, that's the last of the real irish right there in my life That's why I love irish people because of those motherfuckers and whitey o'Donnell Danny Mahoney these motherfuckers were the irish and a lot of times I'm uh, you know, I'm online I got a lot of guys that I fuck around from scotland and island This is one red little headed motherfucker that I call them irish and that's why and it's funny because

I always like these irish kids and they were tougher than death Whitey o'Donnell and Mahoney these kids were tough. This kid was five foot two Playing against fucking six foot eight gorillas and he didn't give a fuck I learned so much from the irish and then one day I read uh John O'Sullivan was another irish kid. I'm not with And one day I couldn't believe how tough they were and one day I read that uh The irish, you know, he told me that his uncle was cuban and I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about John O'Sullivan? He's like, yeah, my uncle grew up in cuban all this shit

And I thought he was lying to me. He knew all these words in spanish And if you ever go to an irish party, they're fucking cubans. They act just like you You know the party will start till somebody gets drunk. Then it's a fist fight. Now you have a party That's how they act. They're like fucking Puerto Ricans, uh, the irish But uh one day I was reading some when I got to the university in colorado And it said that the irish and the cubans are very close because in 1690 it was the battle of the boy So, uh, there was only ireland and cuba was the only other catholic country So a bunch of people I didn't want to fight that could want to keep drinking and argue with their cousins

Food down to cuba and that became uh, you know, there's a lot of little communities in cuba There's a big Sicilian community in cuba where they have pizza and I remember my mother telling me about the pizza I had lobster on it. That was fucking amazing and they also put octopus on pizza and shit like that, you know, but uh It's so weird that years later, I really found my connection with these guys what it was Whether it was chucky or mahogany mahogany. I like six irish brothers and you had to fight all of them Why do you don't I got a picture on my wall? I mean me and his sister his grandpa used to take us to all these other fucking places So I'm tight with the irish serve you irish I always fucking love you till the end because I know that you're not a waspy fuck

I know that if shit goes down you're gonna stick around till the last man is fucking down There's something about irish people and the irish chicks too. My wife's irish the girls in high school I dated mcneil and Colleen mains I get along with irish women. My wife is irish and american indian Some of my irish women and me I spot them a mile away That white fucking potato skin and it drives me fucking crazy their feet always got a little wank to them But it's the best pussy in america, you know saying stuff. Look at look at that friend sitting there looking at the floor Well, we're talking about a nice piece of irish pussy and you're looking around the fucking room

Ephraim's a nice little catholic boy. That's why I like them. That's why we're hanging out and shit So not all your friends were were uh gangsters like they chucky was tough But he wasn't he wasn't running with you doing drugs and all these drugs. He never robbed nothing. No, no, no, no, no Listen, man, let me tell you something Uh a couple years ago we were having dinner or something in vegas and I got into a conversation With any bravo about that tonight You know, you don't you don't smoke pot all day. You're not a criminal I always kept I always kept a circle of different people around me to balance everything out

You know, I hung out with chucky and his family the daytime and I hung out with the criminals at night and I kept him separated I didn't want I never wanted chucky and those people to see me in that condition I never wanted any of those friends to see me fucking coked up They knew what I did, but that's good enough. You know what I do. I never wanted to disrespect them They were my friends that I have friends that I have friends that will fucking shoot me Will shoot you for me, but they don't want nothing to do with drugs I have a friend that asked me till this day when I get in this car You're not holding anything on you know, bro because I know it's disrespectful to him

But I know at any time he'll shoot somebody for me if I need it. I have all friends that are different I don't just hang out with people who do drugs. I like to balance it out And when I was a kid, you know, I came from craziness So chucky's house was the american house. I wanted to be I wanted You know when you're a cuban kid you come to this country and you don't know the language and shit I wanted my house to be like chucky's house. He had a brother. He had a sister They drank kool-aid the father came home from work at five and they made dinner. They were normal people I didn't have that growing up

So I always hung out with kids that didn't have that because I loved that whole feeling I didn't have that my mother had a bar my father worked in the daytime There was no we never really sat down for dinner. So these were the kids. I really hung out with I mean We all hung out at carman balzanos house He mentioned a carman shot a guy down there seven times the back and self-defense That we not go to his house no more. No, we we were a family that whole neighborhood was a family That's why I shot the documentary with you because that's what it's about wanted people to see this This is very rare where a cuban kid moves into a white fucking neighborhood and they accept him

I was the only spick in a neighborhood in the 70s It's like having a white community now an arab moves into your neighborhood You know, they don't know how they're gonna treat you but these guys all treated me with love and respect And I never forgot that I never forgot that man, especially this kid Do you think they gave up on me when I got fucked up? They didn't give up on me. They never gave up on me They knew I was fucked up They didn't tread in my in my way and they let me sleep at their house and they wouldn't let me their car But they knew that I was just going through something when you're 17 and you lose something and

Apparently to something you go through all these little things, you know, and I went through them and I was supervising myself So I love these guys I will talk to these guys till I go to the grave because they were there When I had a mom and a dad and they saw me then and they accepted me So and even though they all called me speck. Do you think I got pissed off? Do you think I let a stupid word? Hey speck, let's go play basketball. I know that at the end of the day I was going to dinner at the house And that's all that fucking mad. You know I'm saying look at you. You're a jew. I'm a speck. We get along just fucking fine

Who gives a fuck? You know I'm saying if you look into that shit, then you're really faking the fuck It's like, you know, now you have to have a hindu buddy to be cool 20 years ago, you didn't want to talk to a hindu they wear sandals Now you got to have now you got to have an azia azzanri fucking cd to show people that you're cool 20 years ago, if you had a bunch of white friends, what'd you do? You invite you invited a fucking black guy over to let your fucking buddies know we're not prejudiced But yes, you are because you're thinking about this fucking black guy. Don't tell me everybody wants to be you know It's funny somebody was talking about uh international. What what were we talking about it?

We were talking about oh, oh, they were talking about how a comic could be shit in the states But he goes to australia and he's huge in australia and then you get something like jim jeffries Who's a brilliant comic and his shit in australia? But he comes to the states and he gets a tv show You know, we always want to be somebody else if you call any agency in la right now call apa call caa It's always somebody with an english accent that answers the fucking phone. Good morning. Thank you for calling caa We is waspy dumb fucks. Oh my god. They're so international. Oh my god. Get the fuck out of here They're just trying to impress a fucking peanut brain like you. That's all they're fucking doing. Oh my god. They sound so

So, uh, what's the word i'm looking for? Sophisticated they have a they have an englishman over there. They have snatch answering the phone You know who gives a fuck get it together. You fucking phony fucks But you know, it's like here. We love english comedy. There could be a great comic here We don't give a fucking about it. We want to be an english comic. Where's ricky java and i like ricky javaeus I'm just saying but in england, they don't want to see ricky javaeus They want to see our crazy asses go over there and talk about america and how fucking crazy it is here and obama and all this Shit, who gives a fuck at the end of the week. It's the church of what's happening now bitches

Lee motherfucking sciat the flying jew. We're back on sunday. We're gonna give you a lock last week I gave out usc minus the 41 against colorado at my alma mater this week Danny bianculo is calling again on sunday if you're looking to make christmas money I would watch this fucking show if you're looking to make yamaka money hanaka money I would watch this show if you're looking to not stay at home Like you by yourself on christmas eve and eat fucking boston market and whack off watching fucking it's a small world Watch this show on sunday. You don't learn how to make a little money. We're gonna give you a pro pic Well, look at the ufc. We're gonna talk about what happened the last couple days

See if lee got a hooky yet to fart in his face for 25 hours People are sending me pictures about that. I told you they're ready I got a chick here who says if I take you down to la downtown to a pool She'll take you to the back room. She'll tune you right up Jesus christ Pussy will get nice and wet like a chocolate sunday that black fucking juice will come out of there and all over your face You know, you ever have pussy juice on your face. You even wipe it off Like you've ever seen the movies of somebody shoot somebody the blood hits them and they gotta wipe

Yeah, but I never had to go fart in my face. I don't want that You're losing dog. This is what i'm talking about. You gotta reassess your goals. You know what i'm saying? Anyway, anyway, I don't want to fuck them get people going somebody hit me up there They enjoy when you talk to lee like that. You get me honed up. I had a block I had a block. I gotta block these people. It's seven in the morning. You can't be whacking off while you're driving anyway Well, that fix me out. Don't like this is a chucky call today I was thinking about what album to gave you. I gave you a great album last week. I gave you a great movie to watch This way I give you the public on its village. I don't know if you're gonna watch on that

But i'm gonna give you an album guys that I feel is one of the strongest albums I've ever listened to You know, I grew up listening to all this fucking dumb shit at my mother's bar wasn't dumb shit Spanish music and soul music and I wasn't sure about rock music You know, I would look at these people that had long hair when I was in the fifth grade They didn't take showers and they did the same drugs. My parents did I want to listen to this shit I didn't want to listen to this creepy shit and my buddy turned me out. He's like dog. Y'all listen to this band They call led Zeppel

And I'm like fucking who no, no, no, no, I'm not listening to no dirty people And I bought cream magazine or whatever it was that day. I looked at that page and I'm like, no I'm not listening to this shit. I went over to his house with nine And he talked me into taking this album home. He's like just take the fucking album. You don't love it I had to be I had just gotten thrown out of catholic school and I had moved to north bergen The kid's name that gave me this album was a year younger than I was. This is how embarrassing He was in the fourth fucking grade and he gave me led Zeppelin. How uh, the fourth one. What's the name of it? How's it the holiest of the name of the album? Are you sure?

Woman took right now and the songs and the albums on that dancing days Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh no quarter The fucking ocean the song means the same right there You got five fucking monsters out of eight and I know that I like to cover American music. I was going to cover the outlaws this week or I was going to cover the fucking eagles I really wanted to cover What kind of love have you got that one song by the fucking eagles that that second album is brilliant? But I was listening out of respect for Chuck and McBreen. This is what we listened to

There was a kid pauli keltos That used to live behind the basketball court and he put his speaker out his window And at night he would play the song means the same for us, but that was used later when I got older But the first time I heard this album I thought my head was gonna fucking explode and every time I hear How's it a holy till today? Is that the name of that album before town? Yeah, you got the third or the third or whatever the because the fourth album is Zeppelin four This is the fit out whenever I listen to this fucking album

I still think of the summer days When I would take my basketball and put it in between the 10 speed and ride up in the hills because this is what I was listening to So you didn't have an iPod den or a walkman You had to listen to music at home and take it with you and your fucking mind and sing it with you play The ocean just this is the fourth song on the first side. I don't even have to look. I know this album front words and backwards Oh, shit, oh, shit Oh, shit, this is it. This is the fourth song every time I hear this I think of sunshine the smell of rubber the smell of fucking asphalt

Just everything burning in that north bergen court because it's human. It's like 80 degrees and fucking send them on Here we go. Crank that motherfucker Oh, shit, Lee Where's that jointly? It's time to smoke that motherfucker pass it around to get you on a thursday Oh, it's a wednesday. It's a beautiful day to be alive. I don't know what you guys got in mind But this is the album here You want to hit on this video? You in on this or what? You're gonna sit there like the fucking driver in apocalypse now You in on this or what, Lee?

It's a beautiful wednesday morning. We'll get you out of the house with a great mood. Wash that pussy. Wash that ass You got to brush your teeth. You got to comb your head. You got to shine your shoes You got to be out there like a fucking soldier. This is getting tough out there. You know what i'm saying? Lee, look at Lee taking baby hits and he can't get a hold of it. Look at this tiny grab that fucking thing, Lee Like a prostitute grabs a cock grab that fucking thing Cocksucker I'm happy you guys took the time to listen today. I don't even know what fucking time it is man We've been talking shit for a while here today

Listen motherfuckers. I don't know what you guys got planned today, but I hope you have a great day clear You got thursday and friday left tonight. I'm gonna be at the ice house with lisa. Yeah doing Testicle testaments at 830. I think it's 10 bucks to get in there's usually 100 people down there people out there smoking dope Afterward taking pictures come on down next week. I'm at the anterio improv Thursday through sunday. I don't know the fucking number go on improv.com and get your tickets and then november 8th It's me and my other favorite jew fucking arisha fear. This is the flying jew. He's the jew and he I seen him yesterday Look great. He's a handsome. He's a handsome little jew. He's walking around with four free tracks for you from the cd So if you got a itunes to arisha fear, I know you think you gotta put your email in you get four free tracks

And beside that, what can I say to your motherfuckers? I love you lisa. Yeah, what are you gonna tell these people? Nothing, I'm just shocked you never to when he told me the story about getting into, uh, Madison's court garden didn't tell me they knocked down the usher Bro, this was and you know, I could tell you the story and tell you like I was a tough guy I was shitting my pants go. I just wanted to go see julia serving play the fucking game I could when he knocked he smacked like three people at night. That wasn't the only guy he smacked You don't understand This has stayed in my mind forever when I tell the story to people like joey

You can't be serious a high school teacher. This guy was crazy. We didn't go to your regular grammar school But I'm happy you guys got a chance to listen to chuckie McBree. He's a good man And support rambo postate college whatever the fuck he goes to he's the head coach at men's uh basketball coach at rambo postate If you live close to the area and you're from jersey, you know, I love you motherfuckers. Anyway, lee, what else you got for these people? That's it man. Just come out tonight. I'm looking forward to what movies are you going to see this week? Any new movies coming out? What's cracking? I want to see the seven seco pass. I know you talked about it Not a bad movie I see an argo already not a bad movie

You know what it's not coming out for a while But the trailer came out yesterday for iron man three and it looks badass. It looks badass Then kingsley's in it. Yeah. Yeah, it looks badass the iceman movies coming out We'll talk more about that the movie with brad pit. Listen. It's wednesday Go out there sling dick with three hands Even if you don't have a motorcycle you're still in the sun's anarchy get a tricycle get a 10 speed with one I don't care if you got one fucking leg. You're still a gangster today It's a beautiful day to be alive go out there. We love you stay black. Lee. Where's the music you fuck

You're slipping. Where's timbaland magoo? Where's caught in fish hitting home runs? Where's the ocean? Where's uh, the sorry maze the same it's I mean the same right here There you go. Blast this motherfucker on the way out. I want to thank my man effing from stinking stick him to come down here Stinking unbelievable. It's no it stinks like weed my man effing from stick him calm for coming down here checking out What the fuck's going on? It's not gonna lag. Hopefully we're gonna do computer We'll figure this out sponsors are coming next week. I love you motherfucker. Stay black. Lee throw kissing these bastards I love you cock suckers

Listen to this shit. Oh shit Oh That's a real fucking bass player listen to these drums right here he comes out throwing Like he's fucking rare hit it. Oh shit. Oh shit Oh Shit Have a great day. Sean Clark. I love you sam hit sam. Hi. I am. I love you hiding from my wife I love you jay grimsey. I love you jack walker. I love you

Keith prado. I love you motherfucker for supporting the show and for giving us a shout out Be water my friend be water. Yes calls and crowns. Go fuck yourself for your Bruce Lee comic. Have a great day Hey