Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #200 - Joey Diaz, Bruce Buffer and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: August 1, 2014

Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt are joined by the voice of the UFC, Bruce Buffer in studio. This podcast is brought to you by: Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout. Nature Box. Visit Naturebox.com and use promo code Joey for 50% off your first order. Naileditlife.com - Get 20% off a vapor pen by mentioning the Church. Recorded live on 07/31/2014.

This show is sponsored by NatureBox where you can order great tasting healthy snacks right to your door. Snacks smarter in the new year with healthy with healthy and delicious treats like Santa Fe corn sticks and french toast granola. Support this podcast and get an additional 50% off of your first order. Go to naturebox.com promo code joey that's naturebox.com promo code joey. The show is also sponsored by annant.com. Go there for alpha brain, new mood, shroom tech, immune and sport, anything like that. Use code word church to get 10% off. And for all the oil and wax smokers out there, go to nailedayatlife.com that's nailedayatlife.com for the premier vapor pen on the market. Mention Joey Diaz and get an additional 20% off. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Special. Wednesday night,

motherfucking edition. The church. So what's happening now? Kick it. One, two, what? Wednesday, 200th episode. Get the popcorn. Rub her feet. What? Lee Syat on the scale. Doing it. Doing it. Fluing it. What? Oh, shit. The 200th episode. Joey Diaz, Lee Syat. Happy birthday to us. That's how we do it. Oh, shit. Special guests. Buffing. Bruce Buffing in the house tonight, motherfuckers. So roll them up. Do what you need to do. Don't momma to take the bra off. It's all over. You're sniffing those titties today. Turn fucking purple. Turn that shit off. What's going on, baby? Everything all right? Wednesday night. Can you believe this, shit, Lee? I could not. A couple years. We had a conversation and we started getting up at six in

the morning. I remember driving to your house after my night shift. I'd go home and pick up my laptop in it. And we used to, first we did it in your office and then when your wife got pregnant, we moved out into the living room and we had to have a little plastic tub over it because your cats would be on the mixer. We believe that shit. And now we've been in two offices and it's crazy. Just remember one thing. Never forget where you came from. I know. Bruce Buff, what's happening, baby? Hey, I'm here and a pleasure to be here, Joey. Thank you very much for coming in. I love you like a brother. And the idea of being on your 200th show, I take that as a major compliment. That's very cool. I was waiting for a while and it was funny because

it's amazing how I've dealt with both the buffers for at least 15 years. You're in different circles through movies, grudge match. I think he did something with the longest yard. He was at one of the parties. It's amazing. It really is just how the buffers pop up everywhere. You're like Puerto Ricans. You're everywhere. You know, considering the fact we, well, I'm Italian. Maybe there's a slight similarity. I don't know. I think you have a better right hook than most of us. But you know, Michael and I meeting 25 years ago and then for all the six degrees of separation that we've created in the last 20 years that I've been managing his career, it's, I'm just mind boggling. I'm humbled every time I think about it. Now, where'd you grow up? I was born,

I was dropped off. I was conceived in Vegas. I was dropped off in Oklahoma on the 21st, which is my lucky number. It's probably why I like to play Blackjack. Then we, I was there for nine months. We moved to Dallas, Texas. So real easily between the age of one and 15, I spent half my life in Philadelphia where my family's all born and from. So I call Philadelphia my hometown. And I spent it in Dallas. And then at 15, we moved to Malibu, which was like culture shock. I'm 15. My hormones are flying. I see girls, blonde girls I've never seen before. All I want to do is lose my virginity and learn how to serve. And I learned how to serve first. I became a lifeguard Baywatch before Baywatch. And it was an incredible, incredible experience growing up

in Malibu. Tough experience actually, believe it or not. What did you go to high school with? Santa mom? Yeah. Went to high school with Dan Blocker's son who went on to do some work. Went to block with not Heather Locklear, but remember the fall guy with Heather? What was her name? But she was every time she walked through the quad, everybody would stop and stare at her ass. I mean, this girl stopped traffic, right? It was crazy. And she went on to have a nice little career and then a nice little cocaine addiction. Hopefully she came out of that. Okay. But she did well from there. And there were a couple other well done people that came out of Samohai, some politicians. I'd have to think for a second, but I'm not sure. And then of course,

hopefully I have something to bring to Sam. I don't know. I'm going to ask you quite a lot of questions today. You got what first being where the fuck is Malibu? That's how retarded I am. Are you serious? Malibu's the beach and up? Where's Malibu? When I go down to Panga Canyon, where is Malibu? All right. If you go down to Panga Canyon and turn right, you're in Malibu. Where's the high school? Like Dean Cain's from Malibu, right? Okay. Dean, tell you a funny story about Dean Cain and all you guys are from Malibu. Yeah. I know Dean because of my girlfriend, Kim at the time. Dean started dating her after I stopped at dating her. And then Dean and I almost got in a big fight at a party at Malibu West

Beach Club one night when one of his cronies got cocky with me and my buddy and I called him all out and that got stopped real quick. And Dean and I still talk about it today because Dean and I are friends, a great guy. A very cool, very cool man. But Malibu High, basically there was no high school in Malibu. Back then it was junior high and it was across from Zuma Beach, which today is the Malibu High School. In those days, because of the politics, they didn't want to have to bus in people from the city, probably the ethnic groups. So instead we all got bus to Santa Monica High School. Now, I grew up in Philadelphia and my school was 60, 70% black that I was going to and I got along with everybody. I mean, I grew up, I'm fine. But a lot of these kids, you know,

they go to Santa Monica High and suddenly they get stood up by, you know, one of the Mexican gang members or, you know, somebody else and they go through their experiences. They weren't used to being in a multi-ethnic arena. So Santa Monica High was a great experience too. That was very cool. But now their high school is in Malibu. To get off the subject, I just recently, you know, it was funny, I did the fight companion with Joe and I was goofing on Atlantic City and I kept goofing on Buff. Buff is the only motherfucker they sent. Even Dana White's scared of Atlantic City because then Atlantic City is no fucking joke. You walk into the hotel, you're dead. When you check into that, whatever, they tell you as a comedian, don't leave the hotel at night.

Is that bad? I'm not fucking around with nobody. When I tell you people, they tell you at the hotel, like when you check in, they're like, you know, you don't leave the hotel at night. Like you just don't do it. Isn't it like a boardwalk? Well, the boardwalk, the boardwalk is there. But if you go outside the hotel into the street, go stand on the corner for 15 minutes. Oh my God. I grew up in Boston. So, and I came here when I was right around 21-22. So I never got to, I couldn't ever go there. So I never experienced. When I did Joe's last time, he spoke about Camden. How Camden is having a big problem right now. Let me tell you something, they're having a problem now. When I was growing up, that area was real. Pensaukin.

Where's Jack Nicholson from? I forget the name of that town. Neptune, New Jersey. We played bitty basketball at Neptune, New Jersey one time. South Jersey, Philadelphia is no fucking joke. I don't want any of you people thinking that that part, that kind of, like I said, for years at that Eagle Stadium, they had a courtroom and a jail downstairs to process you during the fucking games. Even crazier than Boston, crazier than New York fans. So it still magnifies. Like, so I can't even imagine you leaving that area at that time. I grew up in Germantown, Pennsylvania and Sheldonham Township and my brother and I used to, my brother Brian, who I grew up with. We were, I would never allow my kid to do this today,

but we were like eight and 10. We would take the train or the bus and go to downtown Philly, walk through the bad areas, we go to the Franklin Institute, we go to the museum, we go see a movie of lunch and we wound up getting home about 3.34 o'clock. And that was great teaching for us as kids because we had no fear as a result of doing all that. I would never let my kid do that today. No way. Never. I don't even think about it. Like I could never let Mercy go to a bad neighbor in my mind. But you know, listen, for years when I was growing up, my mom said, don't crawl. Because I grew up, when I came from Cuba, we lived on 205 West 88 Street and her biggest fear was Broadway. Really? Right in New York, she'd say, don't fucking cross Broadway. Well,

as soon as I went out that front and her head popped in, I crossed fucking Broadway. That's what you do. Once you cross Broadway in New York City, your life changes. It's like getting your dick sucked by a midget. You're never the same again, you know what I'm saying? Little midget gives you a little suckle of mink with that big head. You're never the same. You go home, you have nightmares for a month. They got strong hands too. I know I gotta call them little people. Fuck that. They're fucking midgets. What do I give a fuck? Anyway, so now you're in Malibu because I always go to Malibu. You know, I did five Christmas movies with Dean Cain and a fucking dog. Really? Yeah, for the ABC family. Isn't Dean a great guy? Dean's a great guy. And to listen

to his stories, he grew up with Sean Penn down the corner. Like shit like that, right? But that's the way it was for me too. On point doom was Sean Penn was Charlie, Charlie Sheen was Rob Lowe and his brother Chad Lowe. And I had Steve McQueen who was my friend living a half mile away from me and I surfed every day in front of his house. His son and I are still best friends. When I moved to Malibu back then, we weren't rich. We've never been a rich family. You didn't need to be rich in those days. No, you didn't. The rich people lived at the beach, which was your celebrities, your movie stars and all that. In the canyon, I lived a half mile from the beach in Trancas Canyon, a beautiful home. It cost like 50,000 back then. Today it cost you a couple million, of course,

because everything's gone nuts. But it's a different world back then. Malibu is still beautiful and spacious. But it's not like it was back then. I thought it was, I just, maybe I'm getting older. I just loved it back then. I loved it when it was more of a countryside. Everybody knew everybody. There was 35,000 people that lived there. No, 27,000 people lived there when I moved there. So the population's increased exponentially larger. I did a, well I watched an interview with that dude who played and analyzed that little Italian dude. In what movie? I analyzed that one. I did the second one. In those days I was doing sequels. I did all the

bad fucking sequels. But I did analyze that. And he was, and I did analyze that too. And he was in the one and the second one. And his name was something Vitarelli. Joe Vitarelli. Joe Vitarelli. Joe Vitarelli did a thing that he left Brooklyn and retired in Malibu. And his neighbor was Sean Penn. Then he lived on Point 2. Is that true? Sean Penn used to torture him and say, hey, when are you going to do one of my movies? And he got, ah, stop it. And finally one day

goes, listen, I ain't fucking around. I need you for this movie. It was State of Grace. State of Grace. Great movie. Great fucking movie, dog. Nobody's ever seen Gary Oldham in that. All you dumb fucks that are watching Gary Oldham and Iron Man. And True Romance. And True, and no, he wasn't bad in True Romance. He was great though.

No, no, but now they're seeing him in Paddley Apes. And he was one of the baddest mofos you could ever have. Dracula. Fucking the professional. When he eats a pill and does that shit with his fucking neck. But one of his craziest movies that nobody talks about is a film by the name of Romeo is Bleeding. Oh my God. I said, what was her name? The woman that gorgeous, sexy as hell. Look at her name. That is one of the craziest fucking movies you will see. I'll tell you what,

as your uncle Joey Diaz will tell you don't watch that movie at night. That's how crazy it is. It's a fucking mafia movie. It's like a mob, a hitman, cops in New York. Julia Lewis. Read the fuck, no. No, no, no, no, no. Read the fucking IMDB who's in that movie. Gary Oldman, Julia Lewis, David Provaugh, Will Patton, Gene Canfield, Larry Joshua,

Lena Olin. Yes, Lena Olin. Yeah. James Cromwell. But Lena Olin. James Cromwell. Who else? Dennis Farina. Oh yeah. They're not even on the first page.

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. That movie doesn't fucking end. That scene in the whole tyroom. Lena Olin plays a fucking hitman. Hit woman. A hit woman. It is one of the craziest movies you will watch. And she's sexy as fuck. Yeah, exactly. I got to say it with you, Joey. Sexy as fuck. I mean, you look at her and you might have- I don't watch that fucking Romeo's movie.

They don't play it on TV. It's one of my favorite movies. No, because it's too deep. It's too, they never played that shit on TV. I think I saw it in the fucking movies. And then I saw it years ago. It was on like Sundance one night. After the exorcist at 3.35 a.m. and I taped it and I watched it two or three times. And my wife was like, what the fuck are we watching? He was married to- He was married to the chick, the Italian chick that Tony was fucking on the Sopranos. That she hung herself in the Sopranos. Wow. I got it. My mind-

Oh my God. That's who he was married to. Ann Maria Scrabbella. Whatever her fucking name is. And he had- Annabelle Scoria? Annabelle Scoria. Oh, the little brunette. She's a- Yeah, dog. Yeah, yeah. What he was was a cop and he had a hole in the backyard and he kept saying, I'm feeding the fucking hole and he put money in the hole every night that he stole and he shook people down for and he just kept putting money in the hole and she left them. But he had to deal with this hit woman and this hit woman cleaned some clocks

on the Upper West Side over which he killed Dennis Farina and they were playing cards. Just fucking- If you get a chance, Romeo's bleeding. That's your little present for the 200th episode. You know, my dad was a writer and he said, there's basically 15 plots and 150 ways to tell a story barring any historical reference, but there are standouts of which this is one which is not a typical plot that's been told. This is an extremely unique film. And if you're a film buffer, you want to see something, I'm telling you right now, you got to listen to Joey see this movie.

I remember that it opens up with they're both bleeding in a car. That's how the movie opens up. Because it goes backward. It goes backwards. So it's a scene where they're driving and he's like, help, help. And she's been shot and he's been fucking shot. And they're driving cutting people off in his blood everywhere. And you're like, what the fuck?

And all of a sudden it shows him like getting married, eating Chinese food. So it's one of those fucking- And remember she had one arm? What was the thing in that? Oh my god. Remember that? That's right. This is fucking crazy.

It's so far out there. Fucking crazy. And I always forget to talk about it, to check it out with fucking Rick. That's a great movie. Gary Oldham Dracula. Everybody says if you take a poll that Gary Oldham's Dracula is the best Dracula they've ever made. Fact or fiction? If you can cut Keanu Reeves out of the movie, yes it was.

Keanu Reeves is probably the worst thing in the movie. And I'm a Keanu Reeves fan. I mean, give me point break every day of the week. But yeah, he was menacing in that. I'm fucking good at this point, bro. So I can watch it every day. How good is it that I died in point break? Swayze is fucking.

I grew up with the boaties of this world. I grew up with the Swayze characters. These were my bros when I was growing up. Everything in that movie I related to, except the bank robberies of course. But I mean, they were nuts. Surfers are nuts. Believe me, a whole different alcohol to themselves. Really?

Real surfers. I'm talking not, I like to surf. I'm talking a real surfer. They eat, live, and breathe surfing. It's a whole different society. And these guys would rob and go hit different beaches to get the. Yeah, remember that's how they found in point break because Gary Busey, who was speaking in Malibu, Gary Busey was my neighbor next door for eight years

during the Buddy holidays. I used to party with him down at Trancas with him, Michael Parks, David Carradine. The Lowe's would come down when they became of age. I mean, you name it. Anybody lived in Malibu party, this place called Trancas. It was the hotspot. I mean, we got brawls there. We got drunk there.

We did everything to imagine there. You don't have anything like that in Malibu anymore. That's when Malibu was a little more quieter, but it could be wilder. Now, what's the stuff about McQueen you were talking about? Because that's one of my dogs to the fucking end. He, you know, I write about it in my book and thank you, Joey. You read my book and really appreciate the words you gave me on it. But I had the pleasure of meeting Steve because when I moved to Malibu,

I became friends with Chad McQueen, his son. And we became best friends. And I first met Steve when he walked up with Allie McGraw to his house. It was right after they finished making the getaway. And they had that really highly profile romance, you know, when he left. How hot was she? Hotter than hot. When he smacks her in the fucking face by the station wagon.

Which he really did. He really slapped her. Well, he's like a belter. What's the scene? We put it on. What did I put in? The getaway. The getaway.

Steve McQueen, Allie McGraw, the smack in the fucking mouth. Sam Peckinpaw film, one of my favorite directors. I remember seeing that in the movie theater. The cinemath movie theater in Unison, New Jersey. As long as you had the money, then check your ID. And then I'm going to see that movie and Steve McQueen fucking destroyed me. Mr. Cool. Just destroyed me in that movie.

And I got to tell you something. I'm not one for big remakes. The one that they remade. With Alec Baldwin. With Alec Baldwin. The reason today why I like Alec Baldwin is because of the scene in that movie. Which one? When he's in jail and Kim Bastian comes to see him.

He's in the Mexican jail. He's in the Mexican jail, he says to her, but behind they're talking. And she's like, yeah, I want to see my brother spend some time with the kids. And in one of those sentences, he goes, can you do me a favor? Can you get me out of here? Can you really? And unless you've been on that side and you've asked somebody to get you out, it's tone.

There's a tone you use. Because they're going to come in and say, you know, when people come visit you in jail, when you've made bail, they come in, they check you out, and then they ask what happened. And now you got to tell them the story and they start crying and you start crying. And then they're trying to tell you how they're trying to put money together or whatever. But the way he cleared the story, the way he cleared the air and he goes, can you get me out? Can you do that for me?

Can you do that for me? That was just perfect. Well, you know what? He was perfect casting because stepping into McQueen's shoes, redoing that. For those of us that saw the original getaway, I used to argue about sequels because I thought, why the hell are they making this movie? I've seen this a million times, but I forget about the fact there's younger generations that don't see what we see.

But as far as Steve is concerned, he walked into the house. He said, hi, how are you? We chat up for a bit. He said, you're always welcome here. Just call first. And he would give a party when he first moved into the house. And what he did was he would take little five and $10 bills and $1 bills. And he'd stick them underneath things throughout the house and he'd sit back and anybody that

bothered to take the dollar bill, he would never invite back to his house. He didn't trust anybody. And he's just a wild character. You come down to the beach with a six pack of beer and tell us stories. And I remember when he did the towering Inferno and I said, hey, should I go see it as a good? He goes, nah, I just did it for the money. Don't waste your money on that film. I went to see that in the movie.

It's dated now, but it was fine. I had an all-star cast. What was back in the days of the disaster movies, airplane and then not airplane to Poseidon Adventure, Poseidon Adventure, Poseidon Adventure, then the one that shook. They did a fake earthquake movie, earthquake, earthquake. And then there was 3D in the movie theater. So the speakers are so loud. People would come out and oh my God, it shook.

Get the fuck out of here. The fucking speakers were loud. You dummy. He's fucking mom. There was no fucking like HD and nothing. They just put the fucking thing to 20 and everybody in the movie theater was like, oh, oh my God, it shook. It didn't shake.

I'll tell you another thing about Steve, not just, you know, get off him in a second, but he's a very tough guy. Bruce Lee would come over and train him. I never got a chance to meet Bruce. I met him after that thing, but he still has the plaque. Chasto has the plaque that Bruce Lee awarded him a ranking in Jeet Kune Do and it's probably, Steve McQueen stuff is going for ridiculous money right now. I'll give you an example.

Let me not get too far ahead of myself. He would have Chuck Norris come over and Chuck Norris. And he'd either go train with Chuck at his dojo or Chuck would train at the house and Steve would spar. He would get in there and get nasty. You know, they wasn't like casual Epon points, but they would spar because I used to train with Pat Johnson, who did all the choreography for live and die in LA and Mutant Ninja Turtles and all that.

Excuse me. Another movie that they've been playing lately. Which one? To live and die in LA. It's a good movie. At seven o'clock every night to live and die in LA. Tremendous movie. Tremendous movie.

Listen guys. Uncle Joey isn't a fucking joke thief. But if he hears something that's brilliant, he drops it. There's a scene. Again, John Turturra. John Turturra. Is the smuggler for the money. Who's this fucking printer?

To live and die in LA. Willem Dafoe. To live and die in LA is one of the greatest fucking stories ever told that America, if they should remake a movie, that's a movie that needs to be ranked. The only problem is they'll fuck it up. They'll screw it up. Fuck it up like they fucked up the mechanic. They took away the patois from the mechanic.

Charles Bronson was a 51 year old hitman. That was the patois. There was nothing to blow up. He was killing you the old fashioned way. He was going your files and see if you had a heart problem. And then he liked the house on fire. So you had to run out in the middle of the night. You'd die of a heart attack.

Stupid shit. You understand me? They fucked it up. But to live and die in LA is about counterfeit. You ever see a movie about counterfeit in the league? No. Never. They don't even make them.

Because the government don't have a fucking shit. But these motherfuckers put together a movie with. Who's the printer? Willem Dafoe. Willem Dafoe. And the guy from CSI, the original guy, is the cop. And he's amazing. And he was also in the first Hannibal Lecter film called Manhunt.

Manhunt. And he's also in thief with James Cahn at the bar. He's the one that grabs James Cahn. And James Cahn shows him his gun. And he backs up. Who the fuck you think you're dealing with? He's probably the most bowl-legged actor in Hollywood. The bowl-legged motherfucker.

And then to live and die in LA, he's very bowl-legged. He's fast, though. He's fast as shit. It's about counterfeiting, fucking tremendous. The music is tremendous. And it's sexy, too. Sexy as shit. I'm telling you.

It's been on, I don't know what station it's been on. But me and my wife watch it. And I tape it and watch it one night. And I go out. How many times am I going to watch it? Just do a search, everybody. Do a search and watch this movie. John Tertura, when he comes to visit him in jail,

as he's leaving, he goes, I'll try to get John. He goes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, don't forget about me. That's why I get that line from him. He goes, don't forget about me. He goes, don't forget about me. He goes, I'm going to get you out of here. And I promise not to come in your mouth.

Fucking tremendous. Couple. John Tertura is another great one. And Willem Dafoe. And George Dafoe. Menacing. Menacing is a bad guy. Tremendous, tremendous.

So on the thing with Steve, though, aside from all his enjoyment of martial arts and stuff like that, and that's partially the reason I got into Tang Sudo, which was Chuck Norris' first fighting style out of the Air Force in Korea. Was due to that, you know, the emphasis I got back then, because Tang Sudo was a big thing back in Malibu. There was a lot of martial arts back in Malibu.

What we did was surf, do martial arts, spar and fight. You know, we had a great time. And another F word that I don't want to say, I'll let you say it. Fuck. Yeah. So Steve had tons of motorcycles and cars

and blow you away. And when he passed away, the family chad, they sold it off to pay a lot of the estate taxes. And I'm talking when he had an airplane hangar in Santa Paula with over 100 motorcycles, two double-winged airplanes, toys and artifacts. I'm a big collector of memorabilia. Toys and artifacts from Buck Rogers, you name it.

Anyway, they sold off a bunch. They got like 15 million back then. Now they're selling his stuff, and it's going for ridiculous prices. In the movie he made, the race movie, it's escaping my mind right now. Le Mans, which he put a lot of his own money into and almost broke them.

But the fire suit he wore underneath the racing suit just sold for $800,000. The watch he wore, which a tag whore, it just sold for $850,000. Right now they're selling his 1967 Ferrari 275GTV. They expect to go for $8 to $12 million because it belonged to him. They just sold another Ferrari that sold for $6 or $7 million. The actual value on the Ferrari was only around two give or take.

But because it belonged to Steve McQueen and the provenance that went with it, it's going for ridiculous money. His glasses in the Thomas Crown Affair, the blue Purcells that he wore, which Purcell made a Steve McQueen model of. You can buy in the Purcells store today. Damn!

So for $35,000 in a recent auction, right here in LA, it wasn't by Chad, it was by his ex-wife who put up this stuff named Barbara Minty, the last wife he was with before he passed away. But nobody knows this. I know this, Chad knows this. When you walked in his house, there was a wicker basket beside the front door.

There were 12 pairs of sunglasses. They were all the same in there. So they were not the original glasses that were in the Thomas Crown Affair as far as Chad and I could figure out. But somebody still paid $35,000 for the sunglasses because he wore them. It's crazy.

So, you know, it's just amazing. You know, memorabilia is a big thing. Nobody in this country really right now remembers Steve McQueen. If you're 40 and under... And they give them the respect. Unless you're a fucking movie buff or a tough guy buff. And when I came from Cuba, it was Charles Bronson, Steve McQueen, and James Colburn.

Clint Eastwood was starting to bust in the scene. But those are the first three gangsters that I remember, the Vellacci papers. That's the first Charles Bronson movie I seen. Then I saw Right Away, Death Wish. Then he started, you know, after that. Remember one of his first films was Vincent Price called House of Wax.

I don't remember that. House of Wax. I don't remember that. I was too young for that. They remade it, but it was the original. And then... Look who died last week. One of the greats, James Garner.

James Garner, yeah. Yeah. Fabulous actor. But he was, he was... What was the show he had? Rockford Files. Rockford. No, before that, he had a show.

Oh shit. That Bruce Lee appeared on. How's that one going? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was Bruce Lee's first TV appearance? Yes, it was. See, who the fuck you think you're dealing with here? Tied on IMDb Bruce Lee.

Bruce Lee's first fucking TV appearance. It's funny if you know anything about that. Well, there's a book out. But I probably... Conflict? Cheyenne? No. No. Sugarfoot?

No. TV, not films. Angel? Yeah. I'm looking at TV series. Maverick? No. What year was it, do you think? Right after Maverick.

You'd probably be better looking at Bruce Lee's IMDb. Nichols? No. How can I look at Bruce Lee's? There's a book out. I read it in Boulder in 1986. I read it in Boulder before I got locked up.

And it was a book. It was basically about Bruce Lee, but it described the chapter about Steve McQueen and Bruce Lee's relationship. I'm 51 years old, you know, and about a year ago, I joined Jiu Jitsu. I've been kickboxing and karate all my life and all that shit.

And one last year I said that's it. I'm sick of striking. I want to do something different. If I'm going to stand up, I want to start thinking. Right. From the videos I see at Jiu Jitsu, you got to... Now I hang around great Jiu Jitsu guys. Yeah.

And it took me all these years to finally go in, and I love it. And I'm pissed now that I didn't get into it when I was 21. I'm pissed too because it was all... I'm furious. It was all about being Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris when I was a kid.

Listen, I came from Cuba. There's a What's Happening on Arry thing where I talk about, you know, the one at one. When I was a kid, Chinese people walked around with their head down. Bruce Lee came along. He was the sponsor for all immigrants. And I was an immigrant.

So now we had a fucking spokesman. When Bruce Lee came into the fucking thing, this was not a white dude anymore. This was a Chinese dude. I was Cuban. I qualified Cuban, Chinese, were immigrants. Something about Bruce Lee gave us hope. Gave me hope as a kid.

And so I read everything about until this day. I'm a big Bruce Lee guy. But one of the things that said that, you know, at the end of the day, Steve McQueen loved Bruce Lee for what he stood for. He wanted to be Bruce Lee. And Bruce Lee wanted to be Steve McQueen. He had what...

They each had what they really wanted deep inside. Like to Steve McQueen, when you're an actor of that level, you're like, don't go see that fucking movie. You know, they know at what point they're like, it's all over. I'm just doing it now for a paycheck. But, you know, at that point, that's what the martial arts was kind of keeping him alive.

If you watch, they say that people really knew, they say that McQueen really walked Bruce Lee through the Chinese connection. Well, his advice to Bruce Lee was the same as what he used to give Chuck Norris, was that, you know, acting is all about... It's not what you say. It's the face.

It's the reactions. It's, you know, if you look at Steve McQueen, every film he made, even down to when he was a fuel brinner in the Magnificent Seven, and they're on top of the stagecoach as they're riding up to Boot Hill, you know, when he was riding shotgun, and Brinner's talking, and Steve's like,

shaking shotgun shells and putting him in, doing everything to steal the scene. He used to drive your brinner crazy, right? But he was really big on that. It wasn't all about how much dialogue I got. It's how much I can get across my face in my movements, you know? I did, Arliss with James Glover. I love that show.

And he was telling stories about when he was in Magnificent Seven, how they hated you, Brinner. Everybody did. The deal was to steal the movie from your Brinner. Who the fuck was this fucking dude who danced with pants on to come from some foreign country and steal this movie from us? So they all got together.

So I guess they put him up in a hotel somewhere in Santa Monica Boulevard in Hollywood. And McQueen, Colburn, and George C. Scott was a boozer. He wasn't in the movie. Oh, yeah. But he was there with them. We'd get hammered and they'd call your brother's room all night. You fucking dancing and hanging up on him and shit.

The next day he'd come on the set. Somebody kept fucking calling my room all night, you know? Because they didn't want him to steal the movie. I love all those old-time stories. Well, I love the old-time stories because I love the old-time actors. I mean, today, Hollywood, I mean, you got idiots, excuse me, sex tape and a fat ass like Kim Kardashian that become famous.

I mean, I'm into talent. In those days, people train. And in the Hollywood machine, when you work for a studio, you did everything. You learned how to dance. You learned how to sing. You learned how to act. You did everything.

And it was a machine that built movie stars. And today, people become famous on TV for nothing. And they equate themselves to major stars. I don't, personally. But like yourself, you've met a lot of actors and you work around a lot of actors. You probably know the first rule is you don't always believe what you see on screen.

Right, yeah. You know, it's not the same just don't. I'm trying to say it in a nice way. Right, yeah, yeah. But McQueen was, you know what McQueen really changed was the Thomas Crown affair. That was a true acting performance of him to dress up like that and to do all that stuff.

Otherwise, he hung out with stuntmen. He rode motorcycles every friggin' day. He couldn't stand the whole Hollywood lifestyle, you know, beyond the women. And he's just a real guy, you know, which I respect. Wow, fuckin' Malibu. The fuck, you don't even know Steve McQueen is just- I know who he is.

You ever see Papi, huh? No. Well, I didn't know who he is. I haven't seen everything. You ever see Bullet? No. Which created the greatest- That created all the car chasing and so on.

I saw the chase from Bullet. We didn't watch the movie. Here's the thing for you, Joey. The jacket that he wears in the poster for Bullet, which was the basic tweed sport coat, right? It's valued at $800,000. This chat has it. They put it up for auction.

The bidding went up to $720,000. It didn't meet the reserve, so it didn't sell. But somebody bid up to $720,000 for a sports coat. Because Steve wore it. Steve gave me one of his sports coats. When I was a kid, I threw it away. I'm ready to go but a bing. You know, it's like, what did I do that for?

But it wasn't in a movie. But, you know, I have a poster of the Thomas Crown Affair that they gave me that hung in his house that I still have hanging in my house. You know, that's going nowhere. And you remember the kissing scene with they done away in the Thomas Crown Affair? Yes, yes, yes.

The 360-degree angle camera angle they used, which, think about what he created. I mean, OK, Travolta got western dancing off the ground and disco dancing off the ground. McQueen, that screen kiss changed screen kissing. Kissing became different after that. The car chase scene and bullet changed the way car chase scenes were made after that.

You know, then it went on to the French Connection, which took it to another level and then another level. You know, and now we have Fast and Furious and TGI changing everything, which I am and am not a fan of. It's amazing how the French Connection was my first taste of real movie, gritty. And the only reason, like I fought tooth and nail, I was going to go watch that.

And I was maybe six when that movie came out. And the commercial was the French Connection filmed in New York where it happened. And they'd show the guy getting shot at the subway falling back. That scene like this? Yeah, that scene where he goes backwards. You're fucking, you're like, mom,

fuck the love bug, bitch. I mean, the love bug was big in 69. And Jan Michael Vincent made a movie. I remember going to see that the strongest man in the world. Come on now. They're going to give it to you. Drop it on me, baby. Jan Michael Vincent married my high school best friend.

He's one tough guy. Jan Michael Vincent, again, he's another one. I tell you, everybody lived in fricking Malibu back then. He lived up the street. And Jan Michael Vincent, I would party on a Friday night. The poor guy had a real serious issues. I would go into back the next day on Saturday night, rather, the next day for brunch.

And I remember one day, and this really struck me that he had an issue, was he was still head down on the bar. They let him sleep there from the point that they closed it. You know? He just, he was partying like crazy. If anybody- I mean, he was Brad Pitt back in those days. He was Brad Pitt.

Yeah, Brad Pitt. If you go right now and look up Jan Michael Vincent circa 1973, you're going to see one of the most remarkable faces to ever hit the screen. Oh, women loved it. When he fucking came on the Disney movie, the world's strongest movie. I remember I had to be like in the first grade,

and little girls were fainting the fucking movie theater. Then he did the mechanic. Yep. Then he did a great movie that nobody ever, it was called Defiance. He played- He played the Marine. The New York City.

Oh, in the street, protecting- Yes, getting a yellow. He was a boat worker. A boat worker, and Paul Lee from the Sopranos. Right, and then- That's a great cast. Great cast. If you look at that movie, you're like,

what the fuck? The guy that played the gang leader in that movie is brilliant. The Puerto Rican gang member is perfect. Yes, his tattoo was Jesus' thorn around his head. The guy popped up years later in the Sean Penn movie of the gang movie. The State of Grace. No, the other one, the gang movie from LA with the rap music 1987, 1988. Oh, what's the name of that film, Jesus?

Sean Penn fucking rap about gang life and stuff like that, that movie. Where he was an LAPD officer with Robert DeVall. Yes, yes, yes. He popped up in that. He played like a death sergeant that bust Duval and his balls. Brilliant. I mean, this is- Jan Michael Vincent could have been-

Not colors, right? Colors, yeah. Colors, yeah, that was it. Jan Michael Vincent was on his way to being the biggest thing in Hollywood. He screwed himself as we've seen happen to many, many actors in Hollywood. And when Busey was my neighbor, I was friends with John Milius, the director for a lot of years. And he made a film called Big Wednesday, which was a surf film. Busey, Jan Michael Vincent, William Catt, a whole selection of actors.

I mean, he was on his way. And then it just- He had an accident. After Chad's dad, Steve, died, Chad started producing some movies later on. And they hired Jan for one of these B movies. And right before the movie started, he had an accident and went through the windshield. And it totally ruined his face. Remember how handsome he was?

I mean, he was like Frank- And he was on the TV show at the time. Airwolf. Airwolf, yeah. Airwolf, yeah. Which he told me. He said he hated doing- He said he loved Airwolf because of the money,

but it was the hardest acting work he ever did because TV kept him on the set for like 16 hours a day, you know, doing this movie. He liked making- Doing the TV show. He liked the hours of the film better than the rigorous schedule of making a TV show. But he made bank out of that show. That was a very popular show for a while.

He was on for a while. And then he disappeared. Then years later, they did like a- behind whatever music type show. But who was that show? I wish you had a bad fucking career. Oh, yeah. Let's forget that.

I know what you're talking about, yeah. What happened to them? And I watched it and I was- I was crying. He did a movie where he played like a beach kid, not Blue Lagoon. One of his younger movies? Yes. He played something.

Jan Michael Vincent was in a film and he played like a kid by the beach with some other girl. Wasn't it with like dream sequences or something? Something fucking weird. What year do you think it was? It was before the mechanic. So Jan Michael Vincent, just press up the IMDB. It was before the mechanic. Sandcastles.

There you go. Something sandcastles. That was the one that saw them. But then he did the mechanic. He also got in trouble with domestic abuse. The girl I told you about, he was accused of whacking her around pretty hard. Then another path that you and I have crossed together is I go to Colorado. I go to see Colorado Mountain College.

They offer all these degree classes, but they also want you to take two guts classes. I don't know what they call them. Electives? Electives, yeah. And one of the electives was Sue Bogdor, which is the cousin to Tang Sudo. It was Chuck Norris's Tang Sudo before Chuck Norris left it. Really? And that's what they sell it at.

That's Sue Bogdor. In fact, one of the biggest schools is on Sunset. Sue Bogdor attendance has dropped. I think all traditional martial arts tennis. So they put a combative school in there now. Jiu-Jitsu or Gracie combative. And because of that, they're doing at least a little better. Yeah, you got to make.

I mean, I love my experience in Tang Sudo, and I've got a second degree black belt in it. But my want was in my early 20s, the dojo sparring and everything, which is just boring. I wasn't doing anything for me. And I enjoyed fighting when it happened. And I don't know why. I wanted to kickboxing. Because when you spar and kickboxing, you're going to whack, or you get to whack the guy. And it was a lot more fun.

And I just got heavily into kickboxing and got out of the traditional martial arts. But I have tremendous respect for all traditional martial arts. And I think for young kids, it teaches them discipline. And hopefully it teaches them discipline in this day and age. So I respect all martial arts. It's a matter of choice. When I went back on my comeback trail in 2007 and tried to get clean from everything, that's what I did. You turned the air.

Yeah, I got back into martial arts again. Because I thought about where I was before my mother passed. And when I started fucking up was when I quit martial arts. I was involved in martial arts from the age of six to the age of 15. Cool. What was your style back then? What's your old style? Gushin Roo Karate.

Oh, the Okinawan Karate. You know, it was all the same. It was when I first signed up in New York City, it was Goju Karate. The black guys, the tough black guys in the 90s. They were tough. They were tough. And then when I moved to Jersey, I liked the karate. I liked the forms.

I always went to the competitions in New York. Were you doing kata competitions? Kata competitions. In those days, there wasn't no punching in the face or below the waist. It was semi-contact. So you had to wear a head thing and you had to kick with those things on your feet. This is what I did from. I did that from probably the age of eight until about 14.

I did that point type shit, Aaron Banks. Well, that actually works out in my thing too, because I'm 57. I'm six years older than you. And if you did that at like 12, you know, I think I competed in the internationals when I was here in LA at the Long Beach and when I was 17. And they didn't, I think Joe actually, Rogan actually won the internationals. Probably. He did all that stuff.

Yeah, I know, because I know he's got a grandmother. He is. He came later on. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't get, I didn't ever even, I never, I went to the local ones on Saturdays and Sundays. You did, you fought on Saturdays and you did form on Sundays and you waited for a trophy and you went home and you went and got Chinese food or you went and watched a Bruce Lee movie.

But it didn't, those kids didn't get high. Those kids didn't have a bad thought. Those kids lives were, and it was, the weird thing was we get together and it was like eight of us. But us three went to the same school. The kid from down the block went to Judo. The other kid went to Taekwondo. Nobody was in Jiu-Jitsu then.

Jiu-Jitsu wasn't even here yet. No, I know. No, Jiu-Jitsu wasn't even here yet. I dabbled in it, but that wasn't a dab. I remember Savat was in the Bronx. I got to go to the Bronx to learn motherfucking Savat and shit. We'll be kicking like French motherfucking. French martial arts in the Bronx.

Yeah, in the Bronx when I was a kid. Like you had to drive to places like that. But beside that, there was nothing, so all of us would get together and we teach each other things. Like, so let's say you went to Fujiaopai Kung Fu. You teach me a form and then I teach you a form, a green belt form, from my karate school. And then he'd teach you something from me, you know? And it was just kids.

But once I got out of that circle, it was when I started fucking up. It was my fucking point, all right? What are you thinking about? Basically, that kept you straight. Then you got sideways. And when I wanted to get straight again, I joined a Kung Fu school in Vermont. And I would go Tuesdays and Thursdays and I'd have to kick and do forms. And it got my mindset of being around people that don't give a fuck that I do comedy.

They don't give a fuck that I've been in a movie. These people are worried about making rent. They just barely could pay that place. So when they go there, they're not there to talk or socialize. They go there to do their Kung Fu and get the fuck out. It's the way it should be. And that's the way it should be. It's pretty interesting, the different...

But that, it always kept me straight. And like I said, I went to Fujitsu Tuesday and I went to Fujitsu today. And I had a great time. I'm improving, you know? Joey, I've seen a big change in you. And I told you that. I mean, you look great. Yeah, you look great.

I'm so happy for that. Sincerely happy for that. But you know, no matter how many different styles you train in martial arts, and I've trained in a number of different styles, I mean, as far as, you know, seeing what they're like, like you say, I call it dabbling is what I call it. Fights come down to one thing. Just punch the guy right between the eyes.

Just punch him right between the eyes and keep punching and keep punching and keep punching. You know? Don't get too fancy. It's all simple. That's what I don't want to do. Punch somebody between the eyes. That's why I eat pot cookies. Give me fucking bully bears and shit.

It's amazing. I don't go around punching people, Joey. I'm just saying, if somebody picks on you or... Did you see that video this week that was released of the guy in the convenience store? The Indian fella I think it was from, the Fod MMA, and they... Did you see this thing? I heard something about a gas station guy. Unbelievable.

These three, two or three guys come up to steal the money bag that they're either delivering or whatever. It's his buddy. And the outside camera caught it. He runs out and just straight leg drop kicks this guy and, you know, puts the knuckles to him and then to his other friend. It was street justice. I'm just like this.

I'm just like, yeah, I wish that would happen every day. That's the problem. Everybody's got a motherfucking camera. So even after you go home and you're sleeping, and you think you did your deed as an American. Well, you got to live for it. You're just going to live on after that. They're going to fucking get you.

This guy should... They're not going to come get this guy. This guy should get the key to the city. I'll give you an instance of where something happened while we're on the subject of street justice. I got it right here. You know, nowadays something like that happens a week later. The VA, oh, by the way, we have to press charges on you

for minor assault because the guy ended up in the fucking hospital. And you're like... Well, didn't the fighter just get off? Because like some guy, some people broke into a fighter's house and they shot him or something, but it ended up being in self-defense like last week. Did he get off? Is it still pending or did he get off?

I think they dismissed the case. Let me see if I can find it. They had another incident with an 80-year-old man. That's what I was looking for here. I read about it this morning. He had been robbed in his house before. And he came home and found this guy and this girl trying to pry open the safe in his house.

They jumped on him. They broke his collarbone. They knocked him to the ground. The 80-year-old guy had the wherewithal to reach for his 22. It was only 22. And he shot the guy in the back. Or he shot at the guy. They ran out of the house.

He was so pissed because they broke his collarbone. They beat him up. They're trying to rob him. He ran out into the street after them. That's like an 80-year-old man, okay? Ran out into the street after him, shot the guy in the back. The girl falls to the ground. She pleads for him not to shoot her.

He says, I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant. She wasn't pregnant. He shoots her, right? Kills them both. Now he's going to be arrested. Probably go to jail for the rest of his life. But he was wrong. As soon as they ran out of the house,

he can't do anything. He can't do anything. All right. This guy, four people broke into his house. He stabbed one guy and killed him. And then beat the other guys up badly. The other two guys ran away. So he didn't shoot him.

He stabbed him. I love it. Listen, man, you're always number one rule. You want to fuck somebody up and invite them all for dinner. That's the way you want to fuck somebody's world up. You invite them all for dinner. That's the old Carmine the Torchway. That's old school.

And that's what, when you get a, when you want to get away with murder, fucking put a, put a string of 20s going right to your door and shit. And just sit there with a BB gun and a fucking bazooka. I mean, that's how you can shoot somebody. You really want to shoot somebody. That's the way to shoot somebody. Just put like eight 20s leading up to your house,

leave the door open and just sit there with a fucking submachine gun and shit. Are you for capital punishment? Am I for capital punishment? I know this is a very to take a sketchy subject, but while we're on the subject of it's hard revenge. It's hard when like part of me thinks like, yes,

like sometimes it would, but then like, could you pull the, could you push the button? That's where like, I'm going to tell you last week or two weeks ago, they tried to ice somebody and it took eight hours. As I ballparked or something like that, that's all new, but it happens once a fucking month. We just don't hear about it. Listen, man.

I'm from the two sides of the fence. If you fuck up and there's a state law that says you got to go. If you do one of those fucking things, you got to go. If you really think about it, you're not really going to go. It's going to take 18 years before you fucking go. We're, we're taxpayers are paying 45,000 a year. For me to say, am I in favor of capital punishment? Listen, man, I'm sitting here.

You're telling me that story about that old fucking man. And I'm thinking about him and I'm thinking about what he's going through. But I'm also thinking about the time I drove Dave black and I was in the car and he went in and fucking, you know, shook somebody down and all of a sudden he's like running. I'm driving and he's running up to the car because the guys are going to get a fucking gun and shoot him. I've been in those situations.

I couldn't have been here right now. Like I'm not one of those guys. I'm so lucky to be here. You know, but I know that situation. So for me to say, should he get shot or not? I'm a fucking hypocrite one way or another, you know. And that thing with the, what I was saying was, is like they outlawed the old system for like the chemicals to put people to sleep.

So like for the past two or three months, they've been trying new ones and it's not working. What happened? Just nothing to rub your butt. No, it's okay. What about a cigarette and you fucking shoot him? What do you want to eat though? What are you talking about?

Listen, it's all over. What do you want to eat tomorrow? I don't know. I think a little differently. I think if somebody murdered and raped, you know, someone's daughter that the punishment should be to have three of the selected family members with baseball basketball in a small room, it's going to happen.

In a real fucking world. Yeah. In the real world. But that's not going to happen because we have Gentiles and they save whales and they're out there fucking swimming, saving the clam, you know, you know, save the mouse program and all that shit. So you have these people that they get light. So you can't in a real world.

I would love to be a prison guard and somebody did something to somebody's child. And for me to go, Lee, come on down. Bring the fucking baseball bat and the fucking fishing pole. You're going up his asshole. You know, I wish. Well, how many people really would? Right. How many people would the fraction of the ones that say they would?

I know for a fact, man, when I was 21, there was 18 people I wanted to kill. And I had no reason to live and I had access to weapons. And I wanted to kill these people. And after a while, I would look at these people for what they really were, even at my young age. And I would say, why would I want to kill them? They're already fucking dead. They're already fucking dead. Some of these people walking around that did you wrong or they just done people wrong.

They're already dead. They don't even know they know they're walking dead. You don't know it. You think like, oh, look at him. He's having a fucking good time. Donald Sterling has been dead for 20 fucking years. He's just got 20 fucking hundred million dollars holding them up. You know?

Well, just whenever I think about it, because it's a hard question, but like every once in a while, they'll have something where this guy went to jail for 18 years and gets out because he didn't do it. Just happened the other week. Like you spent like a year or something in jail, right? How long is the year to think about doing 18 years when you didn't do it? And then like, like you guys said, if someone hurt my mom in any way, I'd want him dead in a second.

But then what if it's that 1% that didn't do it and it's just... Well, that's not always a question, but it's a question that comes up. But listen, if they can let OJ Simpson off when I know for a fact, because of the fact that I know the third prosecutor on the team there and they didn't allow so much evidence in. I mean, come on. Does anybody believe that OJ Simpson isn't a sin anymore? Did you believe it?

After he got off, after he got off, the families wanted him dead. And you could see that he was dead already. You could see him. Even when he won and he cried in the church and they went home and had the party, he was walking dead and he was so dead that he went six years later, eight years later, committed a kidnapping in a fucking hotel. Oh, with the memorabilia thing. Yeah, with the memorabilia thing.

And he wrote a book saying, if I had done it... If I had done it... Yeah, but has anybody ever read that book? I think they might have not put it out. I think they were saying it's going to come out and they got such a bad press. They're revenge. Publisher took the p- You're trying to make money to pay back this fucking defense.

Everybody knows he did it and he got away with it, but he got away with what? What did he get away with at the end of the fucking week? You don't get away with nothing, guys. Tonya, right now, you don't get away with fucking nothing. You know what, man? Fucking John Gotti died of throat cancer. Sammy the Bull Gravano. You know what Sammy the Bull is?

Under the jail in Colorado. He's got a condition from steroids and shit that he shakes. Is he still alive? He's still alive. And his hair and his teeth fall out of his fucking mouth. These people are alive, but they're dead. This guy that beat everybody. The stockbroker.

And that's in jail. And he's in federal jail. Oh, wow. Dude, two years ago. Malouf. Malouf, yeah. That guy's dead. He's just in...

Or Madoff. Madoff is in the fucking jail. And he may have lunch money or whatever. But when he closes that cell at night, he knows he's fucking dead. How do I know that? Because at one time, I was dead. At one time, I was dead. That's why am I for capital punishment?

What if tonight I went to get Catevella as I was moving him with the gun in my hand, as dumb as I am. I went for the fucking gun. The gun would have blown this fucking head off. Where would I be right now? They would have probably fucking... It's kidnapping. Kidnapping too.

And murder. That's fucking capital punishment. So right now, I'd probably still be waiting to get fucking shot in the fucking head with a cigarette in my mouth with a chicken parmesan in my fucking stomach, all right? Better check the statute of limitations in some of these stories you're telling, Joey. No, I went to jail for Canfella.

I did time for Canfella. But even then, I didn't... I remember being in a conversation with my attorney and the district attorney and the chick, and they're saying all this shit. And they said something that brought light to my life. That always brought light to my life day in the meeting. They said the reason Mr. Diaz has to go to prison

is because what if? Really? What if? Wow. Interesting. What if he would have been dragging them and the gun would have went off? What if he would have been dragging them

and the gun would have went off and shot the other guy or shot himself? There was a potential for violence. When there's a potential for violence, you're going to fucking jail. How many years did they give you? They gave me four to six with a reconsideration after 90 days.

I ended up doing eight months, nine months, 12 months. But I was dead. That's eight, nine, 12 months more than I ever... Ever, ever did. Two months in county, a Christmas, a New Year's, a birthday. Trust me.

And it's not you who suffers. It's the people that have to come fucking get you. You think Sandusky's in a federal jail having a good time right now? He's in a closet fucking crying. He knows black people out the fucking stab in the neck with a Motown Sound album. And he's missing fucking little kids at the same time.

He's a dead man. He's dead inside. So don't ever think that these people are fucking alive and having a good time. When you say dead, do you mean like they feel bad? Or could you not even... Could you be dead inside and not even feel bad? Because what's his name?

O.J. Simpson, to me, doesn't seem like he's remorseful. As soon as he won every picture they took of O.J., he was dead. But that doesn't mean remorseful. It doesn't seem like he feels bad. He never was remorseful. Yes, he was remorseful. He killed the best piece of pussy in Malibu. That chick would lick your asshole and she loved black cock

and she loved that fucking you on her titties. Did you find this out on IMBB? It's a 200 fucking episode. It's on her Wikipedia. What the fuck? So that is one of the worst things of all time, that whole murder and how it went down and how they found the fingerprint.

But it rained after the murder. So the fingerprint became a partial fingerprint. They did so much... Listen, man, it was such a complicated murder. There was so much blood involved. How long ago was this? The O.J. Simpson. Oh, you're talking about O.J.

Not me. Not me. I was like, oh no. On the O.J. thing, my business partner's brother was the third or fourth in the prosecution team. Hank Goldberg is his name. You know, when you think about it, like the bit with the glove.

You know, the glove had blood. It was wet. I mean, take a leather glove. Pour water over it right now. Let it dry overnight. Let me see you put on that glove tomorrow morning. You going to be able to stick your fingers in that glove? No, no.

It's just ridiculous. They had the blood in his bronco. She was sliced all the way down to where her neck was. It was through the vertebrae. It was hanging on by tendons and a little bit of bone. That's called crime of passion, passion. You know, and I've heard this from, I used to play poker with the police chief from Culver City

and he was telling me all this stuff. How did this guy get off? I just can't believe it. And then there was a lady who saw the truck speed off, but she sold the story to the inquire or somebody. So that made her story null and fucking void. So he got away with it. But in the reality, if you've ever been convicted of anything

or ever been gone to court, in reality, all OJ did was he put together the Yankees. I guess like a triple-way fucking, you follow me? In your opinion, for most stuff, I mean, of course, there's some stuff you just can't, but for most crimes, if you just throw money at it, are you going to get off? Or maybe probation?

You're never going to get off, but you're going to get a lesson. Instead of getting 30 years, you're going to do six at a country club. That's so fucked up. They're going to tailor it so it's nonviolent because they didn't find your fingerprint on it. And you're sitting there going through this,

but it's a DA, he's arguing, you're a attorney. You know, for your attorney to argue, he's got to get a, they have to get people who go out and invest investigators, and they investigate what's going on precisely to the fucking, because they can't attack that shit. Like with me, when I sat with my attorney, I got convicted of, I got accused of kidnapping one,

two aggravated burglary assault or something, and accessory to a crime, something fucking crazy. I convicted of five felonies, four of them were heavy duty, right? But they couldn't, they didn't find my fingerprints on the fucking, on the handcuffs, so they didn't find my fingerprints on the weapon. Then they did a background search,

and I had been involved in a few fights, but it did, it could never escalate from a few fights to a machine gun. Right. So my attorney told me, you're doing time. You're doing time. How much time? That's the question.

Because what, the question is, they want to give you nine fucking years, I'm going to try to get you four, all right? With, with what, you went to high school, you got your degree, all this shit. How did you feel at that moment when he said that to you? When he said what? When he said, it was evident when he laid it out for you,

Joey, you're going to jail. You're going to go to jail for however you put it, six years, try to get a, how did you feel at that moment knowing that the reality is, besides the reality you're already experiencing, the reality of your future is hitting you right now? I was 25 years old, and if I'm sitting here lying to you, and may God strike me, I knew two years before that,

I was going away. I had to pay for my sins. For me to move on with my life, I had to pay for my sins, and I knew that in the back of my mind. This is all going to go down to what I get caught doing. They had almost got me on the cocaine in 85. They almost had me with this. They almost had me.

And then somewhere I weaved my way out of it. I left before they, you know, they were going to make multiple buys and then tie them in. They never made them multiple buys, whatever they did. They fucked up, but I knew I had to pay somewhere along the line. I didn't know it was going to be for fucking kidnapping. They came in and said, you're looking at 48 fucking years.

If you take this to trial, you're going to get 20. 20, I'm 25, and it's a violent crime. So that means you go in front of parole after 20, and they could still say, no, he's not ready. I'm sorry. After like 15 years, you go in front of parole. Don't make me do the full fucking 20. So I knew I was, I was dead, Bruce.

I understand what you're saying, yeah. I was dead, but I knew that this was my fate. Now I had options. I had to, I could go to Honduras and work at a Hertz. I could go to Mexico in those days. It was 85. I could slip into Mexico like nothing. Or I could do the time.

I could just do it. And I knew that I heard horror stories of people who run. I heard people who got away for 30 years, had a kid with church workers now or volunteers at the hospital. And one night, somebody got into a car accident. They had to go to the hospital and they did a background check and they did a fingerprint one year. The dumbest fucking thing.

Here you are in the middle of your life. That shit's forgotten. And all of a sudden they're going to pinch you for something that 30 years fucking early. And you're waking up every day with that in your head. With that in your head. Yeah. I said, no, I don't want that.

So I got a, I stalled them. I got a good attorney. I fired him. I got another attorney. I was hoping that the witness would disappear. And then finally they called and said it's over. The charade is over. You're going to fucking, you're pleading on June

and you're getting sentenced August 15th, 1988. And then, but in the back of my cocaine addicted brain, I was going to get away with this one because I had gotten away with all the others I had done. For years, everything. I was always one step ahead of them. So in my mind, the lucky angel was going to come through. You know, I'm Catholic.

So in my mind, St. Francis of the Sissy was going to drop a note like he did for that. Well, how they did for him. And angels were going to appear in the courtroom and the judge was going to take a piece of paper from the air and it was going to say, let them go. Because Jesus said so, you know, some bullshit. And they called.

This was the fucked up part, but that they called the Friday before when you're believing. So I want you to think about this. So I was, it was August 12th and they called it 905 to say, hey, community corrections turned you down. You got two options. Either the probation department picks you up or you're going to prison.

I'm going to be in my office till 10. And I'm going down to the file of motion. And I was like, I had till five o'clock. Like I knew that was it. I had to make a decision at eight o'clock. So I did what any other good American do. I went and got a couple of eight balls. And I just went straight to fucking Monday morning.

What a fucking shame. I probably slept three hours before I went to court. And I went with my cocaine mind and walked in there and said, I'm going to get away with it. I'm going to go up in front of this judge. Because you're fantasizing for two days. I was going to go up in front of this judge and sweet talk this motherfucker.

I was going to chuck in John. Yeah. How'd that work for you, Joey? Oh my God. Let me tell you how much it was fucking. And when they said call my name, Jose Diaz, Stan, and he asked me what words I had to say. My voice went.

My voice went. I started squeaking for years. I had been talking, chucking, and jiving. Oh. I can't imagine your voice going. My fucking voice went, guys. My whole body shut down. It was like a little squeak.

I got tears in my eyes. I was dead. Now, they took you to jail that day, or they sent you? Oh my God. So now you've got something else to deal with. You've got to withdraw from not only the eight balls you played with that weekend. You've got to withdraw from your lifestyle.

So now you're going to jail. Now you don't have the recreational escapes. I mean, that's like, how bad can it get? Hold on. That's a great word for drug use. If you know anything about mad flavor, you know he had a little something in his suit. You know what I'm saying?

You think you're walking today and keep that going into jail? This was amazing. This is Boulder County. Yeah. I never forget I had the suit on. And this is a true story. I'm joking around with you. This is a tremendously true story.

I had bought the suit, and in those days, I used to hide my Coke in my suits. So after he sentenced me, I went. Where were you hiding? Like, sew a pocket in or something? In my suit. Anywhere, right? In this suit here where you put an envelope,

I put a Coke in there where you put the handkerchief. Right. And I just opened the closet and I had different shirts that I put Coke in. I bought the suit that I wore to that thing like the Monday before. So I only had that suit a week. So I didn't know what was going on.

I put it on the day I was getting sentenced. I go down there. They sentenced me. My family's in court. The girl I was dating, her family, a couple of friends from Jersey had flown out. And as I walk in, boom. I knew I was dead.

That's it. I couldn't do nothing. I got four to six years. They would decide after they analyzed your fucking brain. They decide what kind of sentence. I fucking go back into the thing. There's a camera in the fucking cell. I go back there.

I have my suit on. I take the suit off. I had my shoes on. They didn't take my laces. Laces out there. Nothing. Maybe I didn't even have laces. I went back to have my shoes.

And I folded my jacket. And I was looking for lifesavers. I go, oh fuck, I got light. Because I know you ain't going to eat for a while. It was one something. So I really missed lunch. So I know I had a lung. I was going to have to get processed.

And then go to county. I knew I was in there for eight, nine hours. And do you know I'm going through my pockets and buff I pull out a Coke rug this fucking big. It had to be a gram and a half. Kevin, did you have anything to chop it with? Oh no, no. I just chopped it with my fucking hands.

And I must have had like a dollar bill or something. I rolled it up like I've been doing for years. And I did it all in one fucking gagoo. That's called, Jimmy. That's called the last hurrah. And I took that binda when I flushed in that metal toilet. And I rolled my dollar back on. And I sat there in county waiting.

There was nobody in the cell with me. And next thing you know they were going, D, I had to wake up. I had passed out for three hours. Right after doing the Coke. Like the stress of me going away. The whole bill. It was over.

It was over. It overpowered the Coke. And that's it. They took me and I got processed. They finger print you. They take your fucking suit. They give you an orange suit. They look in your asshole.

You pee in the cup. You know, that was it. That was the beginning of the end. It was really, and at that time I thought my life was over. Like I- When did it start coming back together? Like after you acclimated yourself for a number of months or? After I was in there?

No. You know I took the party right in there. Don't ever think that. I was 25. You had to shoot me with a fucking bazooka. Yeah. Sure. So I went right in there.

I held it together for a few weeks. The only thing I didn't do in there was smoke pop. But once I got into the system, I didn't do blow enough like that. I did acid. There was a lot of acid and crank in there. There was a white dude from Philly, Clark, what's his name? He was the candy man? He was the speed guy.

He was the biker. He was the biker fucking meth guy in those days. They didn't call it meth. They called it speed. That's it. I think those guys shot it. I snorted it. But I only snorted like once or twice in there.

It was a different experience, which I've always held close to my heart. Like I said, never forget where you come from. Some people would put it away and not let people know. I always keep it in the side of my head because it makes me think of how fast things happen in your life. You ever do any work relaying this to kids or relaying it to like a scare straight type program? You ever do anything like that? To help them scare them a little bit? I want to, but here's the deal.

From the time I was 12 to the time I got put away, life was throwing me a scare straight. I didn't give a Frenchman's fuck. So I know when I talk to Lee after I leave, I know of Lee's a gangster. And Lee's making, you know, if Lee right now in 2014, at the age of at least 26 years old, if Lee was making 4,000 a week to Lee and he was going out every night and drinking VIP in Vegas and shit, 16 grand a month, he'd be paying four for his apartment and he'd blow the rest. Lee would think he was Al Capone, would he not? So when I leave the room, he'd say, he's an old fuck.

He don't know nothing. He's a fucking loser, Joe Diaz. What the fuck does he know? We know. And people knew who gave me advice, but who the fuck were they to give me advice? And I took some of it. I'm not going to lie to you. I took a lot of advice.

I know when some people come up to you, you know, when I was a kid, somebody came up to me and said, give me a favor, don't put down a C-Cock and rob those motorcycles. Yeah, but don't put down that and rob motorcycles no more. Okay. A week later, we went down and got rid of motorcycles and two of the kids got arrested. When I see him the next day, he looked at me and goes, didn't I tell you not to go down there and rob the motorcycles? Yeah, but you didn't say the cops are down there.

I didn't have to tell you. I don't have to tell you shit. I'm telling you not to go down there. That's all you need to fuck that up. Did you say ride the motorcycles or rob the motorcycles? Okay, I kind of, I didn't get that at first. When we were kids, one of the trains went through that C-Cock and sport and they used to carry on the motorcycles, not built.

You pull them right off the thing? You pull them right off the train, you put them into the swamps, and then later on, six gorillas had to come back and carry them out of the swamps. And you had to cut the bike in three ways. You had to steal a couple bikes. You got a piece of a whole bike, you know what I'm saying? So you rebuilt the bikes or you sold them as is? You take them right to the fucking Honda dealership.

In those days in the 70s, they didn't give a fuck. A paperwork, they typed that shit up. Serial numbers didn't mean crap back there? Nothing, nothing. You bring it back to the Honda dealership? To the Honda dealership on the top of Kennedy Boulevard. And say we bought these? No, we're bringing these in.

What can we get from them? In the fucking crate. Don't win Kawasaki's. I don't know what we got, but our main money maker that you didn't even take back to the Honda dealer was the Honda Mini Trail. The mini bike. Oh my. Used to ride those like crazy when we were kids.

You have no idea. Love that. No clutch, three in the tree. Do they have anything like that anymore? One up and two down and three down. Yeah. And you always had the fucking nerd on the block that knew how to ramp the CCs up to 79 or 80 CCs.

Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah. Or what? With the little fat, chubby tires and shit. We used to get those in a box. And one time me, like eight guys, they were a lot older. And they were, and the last time I went down, they got shot. I got shot with a salt and pepper gun.

Salt and pepper gun, they shot and they blow up and then you start scratching for three days like a fucking, like some dude. You mean the rock salt? The police officers used to shoot? This is like, no, it wasn't the cops in those days. It was the Port Authority of Transit Police. The people down with that.

That was the idea of a stun gun? Yeah. There was no bullets. They didn't have bullets. They had flashlights and the salt and pepper gun. Next to you, you're scratching. Like, how do you bowl that shit? You know what I'm saying?

What the fuck? Who's got fucking bowling anymore? The thing that, you know, before we fucking go off the track here, you know, I met you years ago and we always fly back together on Sunday. Yeah. And I always sit with you when we talk. It's great.

I love that. And it's really weird that one of the things, I love when you get to find things out about people. And you always, you know, sometimes you meet people and they're like, oh, by the way, I'm having an art, you're a construction worker. You know, but I'm having an art display down at the gallery. You're like, get the fuck out of my face.

But one day you hit me with your hobby and there is no hobby that I love more that I'm scared to pursue than the art of poker. The art of poker to me is something that there's few things that I would like to be. Yeah, I'd like to be Joe Lozan, but I also like to be fucking a poker player to live that lifestyle.

That, you know, I wish that life would say to you, okay, so you're going to grow up to be 85 years old. What do you want to do? And you're like, well, I want to be a comedian until I'm about 38. And then from 38 to 51, I'm going to be a jiu-jitsu star. I want to fly all over the world. But after that, I just want to be a poker guy

where I live with sunglasses on. And I go from casino to casino all over the fucking world and play poker. I go from city to city doing comedy. Those guys, real, those real fucking gangsters with the glasses and they're eccentric because they're all very eccentric, they travel. You got to chase the cards, you know?

Just, you know, I think, right? Or you just live in Vegas? What the fuck do you do? Well, you know, a lot of these guys, I mean, like the Daniel Negron news of this world who's now the top leading poker winner with like over 20 million in poker tournament winnings. On to Phil Helmuth, everybody's heard about,

I go on and on about the different guys that are out there. Doyle Brunson, everybody knows Doyle Brunson. These guys, a lot of them are like professional athletes, like tennis players that are sponsored. And they'll travel the world, you know, and play all the big tournaments. One like last week or last month I was playing with them

at the World Series in Vegas during the main event. Suddenly they'll head out this month and head over to Europe to play the European Poker Tour. So they'll be in London or they'll be in the south of France, you know, in Monte Carlo or Cannes. Then they're over to Australia and Melbourne at the Crown Casino where I play. That's amazing.

Or they'll go over to China, you know, and they just travel playing all these big tournaments. So it's kind of like life on the road, but you're right. I mean, it is exciting. But that's not the way it is for all of them. Your basic average poker player is what we call a grinder and something I would never want to be. I love playing poker, but selectively where and who I play with.

But the grinders that are looking to make their, you know, with respect, God bless all of them. Because, you know, I believe we're all created equal and like Joey, it's just about the paths we choose. I hate arrogance and I hate conceit. I like real people. So these guys, when they go and they do the grinding to make their 200 a day, their 500 a day to pay the bills, right?

They're there eight hours a day at that table, sitting down, grinding, grinding. That's not the poker life for me. The poker life I like is playing the big tournaments like the World Series where you're going to drop down, you know, some of the events are 1,000, but the main event's 10,000, you know? And you have a chance to win 8 million,

or in this case this year was a guarantee of 10 million for first prize. Or you could win 100,000. I've won as much as 30,000 in that tournament and on and on and on. Or you go over and you play the World Poker Tour in, like I said, the South of France. They even have it in Greece.

I couldn't go play. I was invited. All expenses. Playing was paid for. My entry was paid for. They just wanted me to go play and do an appearance. But I had a UFC. I couldn't go.

You don't think I wanted to go to Greece and play that poker tournament? It could be a very exciting, you know, adventurous James Bond lifestyle life, but that's not the life of your average poker player. I'd say they're grinding it out to pay the bills. And every time a guy comes up to you, I don't care who he is.

I don't care if he's talking about Blackjack or poker or whatever. And out of their mouth is always, hey, I won 100,000. I won 10,000. They don't tell you, the guy that said I won 10,000, he doesn't tell you about the 20 times he lost five.

Right, nobody does. They don't do that, do they? No. The way I do it for myself is I treat it like a business for the last 11 years. 10 or 11 years. I can, on my computer, I can tell you every day where I played,

what I played, how much I won, how much I lost, tally at the end of the month, tally at the end of the year. I've only had one losing year in 10 years, and it wasn't a lot. Otherwise I've had, I treat it like a business

because you don't win all the time. Sure, I can tell you many times I've won five figures, and I'll tell you that truthfully, I've lost five figures too. So it's about keeping track. If you don't keep track of it, you lose track of it. It's really that simple.

That's how I like to work it. No, I'm very ignorant at this gambling style. I grew up around numbers, policy banking, the three numbers at the track, and I grew up around sports betting. So I was never hit to, I saw people play dice because I had no patience.

And because I was a coachman, I couldn't stand it. There's no way you could play poker with those two at the same time. Now I could learn it. You could learn, and you would probably enjoy it very much because you're a very cerebral individual,

and I know being from the streets of New York and your life that you've been through, you've got to be a good reader of people. You've got to have a poker gut. You can see somebody and tell if they're an asshole or if they're somebody decent, probably by that first two lines of the line. You have to.

I always talk to Leah about this. You have to. Yeah, you have to have that kind of perception. You have to put together what they call a bankroll. So when you're gambling, what could I do? My business life is over here. My personal life's over here.

I've got an account over here for poker that's called my bankroll. The money I've won, everything comes out of that bankroll. So that way I control the bankroll. There's different aspects of it. But the thing about poker is that if you can get into it,

for me, it's like a competitive adrenaline rush. When I knock somebody out of a tournament and I take all their chips, right? We're not there to make friends. We're there to make money. But we're there to have a good time, too. And I do have a good time playing.

When I take them for all their chips, I get this real feeling of like adrenaline rush, of competition. I did a competition in the past with the surfing and martial arts and all the stuff I used to do in the past and still do it today. I still surf and stuff, but it's like

I can't go out and bang away and take the abuse of my body that I used to. So I look for competition in different areas and a lot of them it's cerebral. And poker gives me that rush that I need. How many people have you been playing poker for? My dad taught me in nine how to play poker and blackjack.

And he taught me about horse racing. He said, never follow horses. If you're going to follow them, follow them with a shovel. Don't bet on them, right? Which is great advice. I started playing cash games when I was 14 with my brother, Brian.

And we used to play these. There was a country club near our house in Philly and we would play the Jewish caddies. And we'd have games at our house. And my brother actually made enough money to go to Europe and take a month vacation over in Europe when he was 18. And then the real poker boom

came in 2003 when Moneyweather, Chris Moneymaker won the World Series. Because back in the old days of the World Series, there was maybe 150 or 200 entries. So the guy that won the World Series, like Amarillo Slim or Doyle Brunson back then, they maybe beat 200, 300 people. Today, you've got to beat a field of like

6,500 or more people that enter the main event. Right? And you've got to get down to the top 10% in order to get your money back, which is 10,000, and then start making money on that from that point forward, all the way up to the 10 million

that somebody will win in November when the final nine players come back. So rounders that we talked about earlier, and when Moneymaker who entered a satellite, which is a tournament you play online, in his case, for like $35 give or take, he entered the satellite, and he won a seat into the main event World Series.

He went on to win the World Series, and he won two and a half million dollars. So he was this dysfunctional degenerate gambler from the Midwest who was an accountant, but then became world famous for being the common man, becoming famous overnight, winning his 2.5 million,

and that just set the world on fire. Suddenly now you've got four, five, or six TV shows, World Poker Tour, World Series, Celebrity Poker, all these shows coming out. I played on every one of them, except for Celebrity Poker and High Stakes,

but they all just started growing like rabbits, and now thousands are going into Vegas and playing the World Series, and it's just built, and these websites like Full Tilt and Party Poker. Party Poker came to me in 1999 and wanted me to work with them, bringing the poker world into MMA events,

and this is one of the things I regret in business. I didn't see it back then, but I saw it two years later, but it was too late. I had a chance to work for them. The lady that started Party Poker sold it and went public for the biggest sale of like almost any company around,

like billions, billions. So you're still allowed to play poker online? What's happening now is the Safeport Act was signed about three years ago when I was on Full Tilt. I was on Full Tilt's poker's team for four years. They used to pay me to play poker online on their site, and the Safeport Act was signed in April.

We call it Black Friday, and all online poker in the United States went away because you can't use a domestic banking or financial institution to put money into an online poker site. So all the sites, Full Tilt, Poker Stars, everybody had to stop play immediately. We went on our computers to go play that day,

and there was a Department of Justice symbol on each site that they were closed. And people started getting arrested at Full Tilt. Right now, it's a state-by-state situation, and Ultimate Poker, who I'll be signing with, it's one of the owners is Lorenzo Furtida, they are now playing online, and it's legal in Nevada, or Nevada, rather, excuse me,

and it's legal in New Jersey. And the next three states to pass will be Pennsylvania, New York, and California by everybody's estimation. So in about two to three years, the Wild Wild West is going to come back, and you're going to have these 20-year-old, 19-year-old kids playing poker online,

and I know many of them, more than I can count, that are making six figures, and not seven figures a year, just playing online on their computers in their homes. You play online, don't you, Lili? No, I like card to like blackjack, but I was never good at math, and I've listened to podcasts,

and I've watched some of these shows to understand the statistics that you're looking at, and to be able to know when to, like, if you watch it on TV, there'll be players that fold, fold, fold the minimum bets 10 times, and then, like, if it were me, I'd panic, I'm losing that money, and I would make a stupid bet.

Like, the point in poker, from what I've seen, is that you just have to wait for that one hand, and win a $6 million pot. Like, you can't, I don't know, I mean, I don't know if I'm writing out, but it's not like blackjack, where you're looking to win every hand. Um, I'm a big blackjack player,

and I actually made my money for six months in between companies that I own, you know, because I had to pay the bills, I would fly to Vegas and try to make four or five grand just to pay the bills that month. So I can actually say I lived, as a blackjack player, paying my bills for about six months, and it's like, you have to accept the fact

that in blackjack, the casino always has a slight edge. Right. If you can win three hands in a row, you better, you know, there's systematic betting, it's all about money management. Right. Because you can't win every hand in blackjack, it's just impossible.

Oh, I, you have runs, you have runs. And then, I don't know, I know you work a lot with a casino, so if you don't want to answer that, that's fine, but everyone I talk to, because I love Vegas, and I always talk to people who make, they're living there, and everyone says, ultimately, to win a blackjack, you have to count cards. Like, do you think that's true?

I think if you're the kind of person who's going to play every day, that would be helpful. There's a, I'm not a card counter, but I play with a system called BSC, I call it Ball Skill and Confidence. And you better have a 20% luck factor to go with that. And what I mean by that is that the skill comes from learning and understanding the game.

So, I can ask you two questions, and that'll tell me if you're good at blackjack or not. Okay. You ready? I'm also really high, so give me a little bit of a break, but yeah, I'm ready. Well, if you can't play blackjack when you're high, then you can't play blackjack, come on.

That's true. Okay, hit me with the question. All right. Dealer's got a six showing. Oh, no. And you've got an A-sport. What do you do? Well, are you playing a surrender thing or?

Because I- No, no, no, no, you're not in a shoot. Let's just take it as an example. You can't surrender, you've got to make a good answer. I would have to hit. Okay, that's not the right answer. I know, but it's like- No, but I didn't mean the right answer is to fold.

Or excuse me, is to not take a hit. The answer is when the dealer has a four, five, or six, those are their bust cards. Okay. It doesn't matter what you have in your hand. You're betting that she or he is going to bust. Right. So you want to edge your bet to make the most money at that moment.

So if you have $50 on the hand, double down. Double down and take one card and let them go for the bust. That's how you make money at blackjack. That's one example. You have a pair of eights. You get dealt two eights, the dealer's got a king. What do you do? Well-

Which is 16, folks, for those- Right. You're supposed to split it, but he has a king. So you're worried that you're going to lose a hand. So- Yes and no, not necessarily. And it all depends on your chip stack, because there is such a thing called gut calls.

The book can say whatever it wants, but this is what you follow. This is what you listen to. Yeah. Now, in a chance where you can- I'm sorry if we're speaking Spanish to anybody listening, but if you, at that point, surrender. Now, we'll get back to surrender. If you play on a shoe where you can surrender,

every hand that you can bust on, surrender that friggin hand. Get it out of there. You will save so much money over the next couple hours. Okay. Going for those winning hands. And I think of one last one. The dealer has an ace. Finds out that they ask you for insurance.

You say, no, they check to have a blackjack. They don't have it. You're looking at your cards now. Right. You've got a eight and a two, which is 10. Right. What do you do? You're supposed to just hit it.

No. Aren't you not? You're supposed to double down. But I, the one, it was like a king of blackjack or whatever. It was a wizard of odds. Said that when it's a fate, like a king, queen, ace, you're worth it. They're going to, they didn't have blackjack.

They didn't have blackjack. Fuck the wizard of odds. What the hell? Who the frick is the wizard of odds? Wizard of odds. A wizard of odds. Fuck that punk. Okay.

Where you at? That fucking dude. When was the last time you seen him belly up on a fucking thing? How much he charged you for the program? No, no, it was free. I'm so high right now. I love you.

Jimmy, you can always, you know, a poker, excuse me, blackjack, you can definitely make some money at. Here's the, here's the big key to the situation of blackjack. Make sure you know when to get the velcro off your ass and get up from the seat. Yeah. That's what it was about. You know, you go in and hit them like,

like you wake up in the middle of the night with your girl and you give her a pearl harbor three in the morning. You know what that is, Joey? You don't fucking know. But you know what a pearl harbor is? No, I don't really. It's like, you wake up, you look at your girl, you feel like you're in pearl harbor.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Go back to sleep. You know, sit there, sit there, do an hour session and get the hell out of there as soon as you're up. Go have a drink, go talk to girls, whatever. Then go back and go do another session. Don't sit there for six hours straight. They're going to get you.

Yeah. Well, they always seem to get me when I go back. Like if I win and I step away, going back is always a mistake. I'll make you a promise. You guys come to Vegas, you know, I'm there. You're with Joey at UFC. I guarantee I will promise you 45 minutes to an hour. We're going to play some blackjack.

Where do you like to play in Vegas? I play poker, but mainly. But I don't always have time when I'm there after UFC. You'll usually, unless I'm with a girlfriend, usually see me at the blackjack table after I have dinner. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I, it's stupid.

Oh, I do want to actually, I want to ask you this. Have you played blackjack switch? I see. I will not play wild cards. I won't play any of those. I love switch. No, that's great. That's like, that's like Jewish poker.

I'm sorry. I don't want. It's Jewish. Oh, there you go. Okay, you got it. Okay, I'm sorry. That's why he loves all that shit. That's how they get you.

I'm Italian. Okay. We're very similar. Our mothers are very similar. Oh, I'm sorry. I went to your house for the brisket and the twice baked potatoes. You came to my house for the pasta.

Okay. But in reality, Jewish moms, Italian moms, a lot of similarities, right? Right. Yeah. No, but it's, uh, you don't like it? Cause most times. No, I didn't say I didn't like it.

I just, I just play straight blackjack. I don't play, I won't go to the casinos here in LA and play the 22 California blackjack. Right. You don't want to play games because he knows every time the switch, that's more money for the fucking house. It's another angle for the house. It's another angle, all that shit.

And I don't even know cars, but I know anything. Unless that's what they want you to do. They want you to go in there. Give me a volcanic. And next, you know, you suck in 22 fucking cocks. You know what I'm saying? Filipino dicks right there at the fucking congress. Cause they know that y'all right.

Yeah. You got no egg rolls. What are they doing? Oh. Let me ask you this, Bruce. Could you make a living, just gambling every year? Mm-hmm. Just playing if I chose how many nights a week would you have to go out if I was to choose Which I would never choose, but if I was to choose that kind of life

I would probably take three max four days To play what I needed to play to pay the bills. I like I said, I do not want to be a grinder But in poker I can do more than pay the bills I could if I if I went into poker professionally like these guys I I really truly believe because I cash usually 70% of the tournaments or 60% of the tournaments excuse me that I enter where the average good amount is 20 to 30% I don't play as many tournaments as the guys I know if I got really into it and and honed my game. I've made six figures easy playing poker

I know I would wow if not millions, you know wanting some of the big tournaments. I would get sponsored by some of the big you know one of the big sites like some of the guys I know and Hopefully they would sponsor me and I travel and do the number But it's not the life I choose when I decide to stop doing what I do in sports and entertainment You know retire out of the octagon in that area my life or whatever I will I do like poker because when I retire it's going to be something I can have fun playing When I get older, but I'm gonna I want to do other things. I want to play poker I want to hopefully, you know still be dating and having fun

I want to be able to surf and and see movies and do all and read and just do what I love in life It wouldn't just be to do one thing. I become a very unhappy person. I got to have a zest I got to wake up and feel fresh, you know, I like Variety, but you but whenever you choose anything in life, you got to focus if you don't focus You're gonna do it half-assed. You're not gonna succeed. No, it's always nice to find what people's Well, yeah, when your hobby makes you a little bit of money, but it's very enjoyable my hobby I make money and it's collect is collecting Collect antique weapons and artifacts. I collect vintage movie memorabilia

I got a huge poster collection that I cherish like it's a wonderful life creature from the Black Lagoon Day the Earth That's still I got all these, you know amazing art pieces and I collect sports memorabilia one of the biggest things is one of the best investments you can make today is Wax packs remember the wax packs we played with the kid for five cents you get a pack of tops baseball cards Yeah, okay, so like I was born in 1957 the card costs the pack of five cards and a bubblegum piece Costs five cents. How good was that fucking bubble? It was great every time Fuck it broke into like 18 18 pieces every once in a while You got a fresh piece that was the day you're lucky is fucking day your life

But it's not that gum always broken to 18 pieces took you like 15 minutes just to get it right But it was good for about four minutes. You know what that pack costs today 1957 tops. I just bought one last year It's like a valued at a little about 5,000 plus and these packs have actually go up an average of anywhere from 10 to 30% Or more a year like Michael Jordan's rookie card is in the Fleer wax pack again costing five cents I bought these in 1992 for like 20 bucks, right they want to just sold on the eBay on the internet just this week for $990 two years ago or a year ago. I paid 450 it doubled in price in one year

Why simple economic theory supply and demand that's what collectibles are all about today you buy stuff anything pre 1975 is your best area to think about collecting and sports memorabilia Pre 1975 because since then they started printing paper Maybe some of the early 80s specific things like the Fleer pack. I told you with Michael Jordan, but from the 1990s on It's just tons of paper now another collectible when the UFC Trading cards came out by tops those boxes cost 60 bucks 70 bucks, right? They're 800 plus dollars today And they sell the first issue

So I used to tell everybody my podcast go out and get go buy yourself a couple boxes put them away You know, there's ways to make money that collecting is a big thing. Don't throw anything away. It's That has potential value. I Don't want to run on about this. This is what my TV show that I'm working on is gonna be all about it I just can't collect the deals with sports. It's that's fucking amazing. My buddy was George Kaledinsky That's what he does. He frames everybody's shit Benard King Bernard King has a guitar a burger King. There's Albert King

There's a buyer for everything Joey and he was amazed basketball men. Do you remember that some guy sent me a 76er basketball, right? He found in his garage. I took it to the collector the collector said it was Atlanta Hawk basketball That wasn't Julia's Irving. It was Joe Joe white. It was the weirdest fucking thing. They found all this shit out It's fucking that's a complete different world that I don't know about is there really a lot of money in it and really a sport collectibles Yes, I know people that make tremendous amounts of money, but you got to know what to buy my brother Brian's amazing at it Amazing his house is his house is actually like a Store, I mean, he's just into that room for everything he has, you know, we've got to have we've got other areas We put stuff now years ago HBO did a special sort of like what you did for Brian Gumbel

One of those guys on there and it was about the whole scam Do you authenticity scams the big authenticity scams in the signatures? I purposely I have very few signatures that I collect unless I personally got them from somebody like Magic Johnson You know, I met him back in 92 and you know, I signed a picture for me and we were doing some charity thing together And I know where if I can prove with a CLA which is called which is called certificate of authenticity You got a really it's like the horse's mouth that told you what they told you it's all about who you heard it from, right? Well, it's all about who you bought it from in sports memorabilia. Yes, because there's such big wherever there's big money

There's gonna be Counterfeit, you know Unauthentic stuff as an example out of sports memorabilia like when I was was and do collect, you know The antique weapons one of the biggest collectibles even to this day in the most valuable is German military from World War two as an example of German Okay, when you get a German Luger It should be stamped with the last two numbers the serial number on roughly 16 or 17 different pieces inside the Luger And I know I know how to find them all I take it apart find them all But then if you take it and you take one piece out and you change it which has a different number

That gun that could be worth 10,000 suddenly is worth maybe a thousand if a lot of people will take it and they'll refinish it Or what they call reblu it thinking they've got a beautiful piece. I know you just ruin the whole original value of that piece With like refinishing a car, you know, you buy an antique car here a lot of them got to be fixed up But who fixed it up how they fix it up, you know, all these things come into play when you're collecting You ever collect anything only like stamps or bugs? No, nothing you fuck. It's a No, collect the nothing. No, did you yeah, I collected comic books for a couple years Oh, okay. I thought you meant to collect this guy for a couple years Joey big money in comic Big money. I used to rob the guy bring him back. It was a fucking night

I might I'm so upset because when I was like 10 I had the you know original spider-man's and all this I saved my brother Brian saved it and I don't what happened My dad or something of all people's the biggest collector. I ever knew we threw him out and to this day that collection We had his kids would be six figure value. I don't know that Cincinnati red gloves Orlando So pay this first. I had fun to shit growing up. We have a fuck didn't you collect none of this again? No, I didn't know I know I pull out a bill sports Boston Red Sox They had these little in what you collect plastic things the kids used to I don't know you flick them at each other and like they would It'd be battles. I don't remember the name of how many did you collect all of a sudden?

Yeah, oh, yeah, we carry them on around in these cases. That's all you ever fucking collect it I had baseball cards, but I was never like into it. I was just any time I got a baseball card And it's a little notebook Well, how do you know what to collect? What if you kept these for 8,000 years knives or people dead people's teeth something I collect something only You know, yeah, I fucking have a good time. I tried to collect shit and I got rid of it. I got born here Here's the key to collecting here's the key to life in my opinion and you got this from hopefully from my book I'm a very passionate individual

If you have passion for something like I do for movie memorabilia, you know as an example And I can look on the wall at my seven foot tall poster From the movie. It's a wonderful life, which is one of the you know, best movies ever made so played every Christmas I look at it and I get a good feeling. I'm passionate about it makes me feel good If you can do that and collect and you know how to make money at it at the same time It's perfect. It's kind of like having a job like what I do in the octagon. I'm so passionate I love so much what I step into that octagon. I live for that It's one of the greatest things I can do it

I do in my life and that thrill just gets more and more and more and I get paid for this, you know Unbelievable, that's you do it right and you have a lot I remember sitting with you like for UFC 94 and talking about how you have see 100 was coming up And you were gonna do the buffer 360 and we were all excited and red band was tapering and we're fucking excited And you went out there and you did it one move, you know, it's just and I see you, you know I'm at the Wayne's my whole thing about the UFC is if I don't go to the Wayne's It ain't the same. It sets up the whole picture a party is the fucking Wayne's if you're an amateur You don't go the Wayne's is the whole thing and I haven't been going. I've been lazy. I don't go

It's a while I like to go to the Wayne's when I'm in Vegas I'm in the fucking hotel and I go right from the Wayne's up to my room like a soldier and I refuel for the night I don't be walking the streets in the way and people gonna fuck me in shit That's why I don't go but I love the way in time was talking about and I'm like baffling I do for the hundred the 360 And I was very excited. Excuse me I thought I had a little burp that came out of my muffler and my throat at the same time You ever have one of those? No, but I guess I'm about to enjoy it in about three seconds You parted on me online at the cafe yesterday. Oh my god, where did I fart on that at the coffee place?

That's right. You're standing by behind me by mistake You said smell terrible and it was one of those farts that comes out and then it doubles Like it just got momentum to it like it not to segue from your story But you know, you know the new thing about farts is a smelly farts might be good for your health Did you read this? Did you hear this people said he has a joke that a girl's gonna fart in my face So I had about ten thousand people tweet to me look at this man flavors trying to help you He don't want to let the chick fart in his mouth finish your story finish your story about what was he talking about a second ago Was he was he was going on somewhere? Oh, we're uh, right? He farted on me

Like the coffee shop nice Marie T. Yeah, you see what a fart does it just breaks up the momentum of everything, right? It's delicious. Let me give some shout. What were you gonna say? I'm sorry Well, actually, I was gonna I was gonna change the subject a second and ask you and tell you that I think one of the most ridiculous Things that I've ever heard it. I don't watch the Kardashians, okay? I mean Big ass in a sex tape easily released fine and granted, you know, I give her all the credit or mom all the credit You know go make money do what you do, but this really is too much the rich just keep getting richer Have you heard about what's happening with this app Kim Kardashian Hollywood? No, all right Somebody came out with an app Kim Kardashian Hollywood. It's currently being downloaded and what you do is you download it for free

I feel like I'm gonna sell another hundred thousand apps by talking about this, but now with this audience. Okay, good Thank God. So you you basically you download it and the girls whoever downloads it You pay money to dress up and buy the clothes and rub shoulders with celebrities. It's a map See it's a cartoon. They're paying for their characters in the app. They care to wear to wear clothes, but they're paying real money So it's currently making it's currently making $700,000 a day She gets 50% Right her mother's probably gonna get the usual 20% cut her cut take from this right now is estimated

45 million they say 90 but should 90 million it should get like half you did the numbers She's gonna equate her total net worth with this game The rich just get richer, but it's all about who is getting richer. It's unbelievable. Who's fucking giving her 700 times I want to know who the fuck is ordered this shit from fucking Kim Kardashian Who's at home right now going you know what I want to dress up and it's not even for them to wear I want to dress up the retarded brother. It's an app. They're playing on the phone. It's a fantasy app It's like when you go to Mafia Wars on Facebook and I'm coming out with MMA Federation Which is the the social game app for MMA. I've got a team of developers working in London right now

I don't know if you know this Joey, but I made three video games called ready to rumble boxing and I've done You know a lot of stuff in the video game industry, but my game comes out in March of next year You ever see Mafia Wars on Facebook? Yeah, this is this is MMA meets Mafia Wars in Farmville It's a total thing it we're gonna be signing fight teams We already have signed fight teams from all over the world coming in none of the UFC fighters because they're exclusive to the EA game Which is a great game the UFC game that just came out by EA But this is not a video game where you're pressing buttons and throwing punches You totally become immersed in the world of MMA and you pay for things to power up

It's free to get it, but you'll be able to train with American top team fighters You'll be able to train with the aka be a train with Ferris who trains George St. Pierre And you'll be able to get in their world of videos and I go on and on and on and I've got a team of literally 15 developers in London with my partner who's in London Creating this game and we just hired on as one of our VPs the man that created fight night for EA and call of duty and all and It's good to sit one of my big projects Joey I've gotten immersed in all the but I like that's the thing I got I didn't have the money to to be paying to get up

So I'd like they make you wait like six days to play and so all those games are tough They get it they get addicting though. What's your favorite game? Give me one game Oh that jelly splash thing was fun Like you flip the characters and you break that I don't know Jimmy Europe you like box you like fighting games at all. Oh, yeah I'm actually waiting to get that out when I get the ps4 so I can play the new movie if the game Why don't you tell me what it brought you a copy for gosh sakes? Oh, I got I just EA just second I'm you know, I was in the game and they've nicely sent me a half dozen copies

Oh, that's cool. I got an Xbox. They sent me ps4's Do you know when all that shit came out by the time those things came out Nintendo? By that time I was over the hijacking trucks. You should yeah, you're gonna sit home and play a video game fuck Y'all was living it. Did you type of I swear how fucking crazy is these kids that the kids these adults even myself? I mean I when I had ready when I first came in with ready to rumble box and did you ever play that game Jimmy back in 2000 My name is Lee Oh, why do I call you Jimmy? It's Lee. Wait, am I saying there's a fuck. Why don't you tell me for the whole damn show?

I'm saying Jimmy for God's sake. Jesus Lee You are high if you can't even acknowledge your own name This is why this is why I got a friggin write them down on on three by five cards when I work So I don't forget a name now You know what you know what I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna send you I'm gonna I'm gonna mail you just for that for being a dick on the show and not knowing your name I'm sending you a UFC game for your ps4. Thank you. All right Will you will you give him my email joey and email me your dress? I'm sending it to you. Okay, we get it together

I have to be the worst friggin guest on the show ever This is tremendous. Oh, you call them fucking Jimmy. Oh, he's done All right, well, you're gonna be playing UFC next week. Just give me an email with your address, okay? Let me give some shout outs real quick. First off 200 fucking episodes you guys I love you at all my fucking heart the whole death squad family That's what Nashville That's what Harlem that's what Australia That's why the fucking deep deep deep in the jungle in the Philippines, whatever

Rick Monkree, Simon, Holloway, a Koover, Oppenian Jay Dominguez, Luca Banana, Sandman, Luciano Soprano, Lauren Lauren Fucking Jay. I love all you cocksuckers Constantine, Leon, you know waterbox you guys are the backbone of the organization God bless you for being around cocksuckers and for hanging out and giving us love We did the live podcast like Miss Pat last night you savages showed up people were smoking dope shooting everyone out in the fucking parking lot We loved it some chick got fucked out there. She was bleeding from the mind was tremendous Why did I come on the night of the nuns because we got to come here?

I can't have you up there with those fucking savages if you missed the live podcast last night some fucking cool I gave us some free vapor pens from the company fucking vapor. I love those guys. They said that's a good vapor But I gotta bring one in tomorrow and smoke that motherfucker That's a good one because you could buy the weeper and put it in there too could have been puffing right now How many hits you get off one of those cartridges It depends the vapor at the place I go to now they sell the vapor for 25 bucks. It's a half a gram You know I go on a trip. It lasts me two days a little vapor Well, you also smoke a lot more than most people most people so that's pretty good to probably the weeks or so

I would I would think if you have one of those I'm sorry to interrupt your shoutouts, but if you have one of those vapor pens in your pocket and You like smoking, you know pot How can you not take a hit off that every half hour? How can you how can you have any discipline when that thing is sitting in your pocket? Because it goes right down. There's a vapor. There's a vacuum on the plane people Smoking on the plane. Oh fuck. Yeah Don't use the term blowing on JFK. No, I'm sorry You know that did sound good. No

The fucking vapor pen I don't you know, I now I don't do it I don't care no more because the vapor pen gets you high in the morning after that doesn't really get me I throughout the day. I need to smoke in the morning to get the party started That's because you smoke a lot. I stopped because it's a jiu-jitsu. I let's stop. Oh, so you don't smoke before you do jets No, you didn't smoke at all. Well, every once in a while I smoke last night when I got home I smoked a little bit this week. So I got some shit now and they got I got they got these two top shells They smell okay. You know what man? I'm doing these breathing exercises and stuff. So the breathing is getting better at jiu-jitsu I'm working on them every day. I'm holding my nose and counting to 60. You know me Lisa

Yeah, I'm gonna fucking get it. You gotta shoot me with a bone arrow ten times The fuck guys everything all right everybody. What the fuck Lee look at the shape of you today Hey, this is four days in a row. You did. I can't believe you didn't collect stamps as a kid You look like a type of kid collected something. I wish I did. I'm like a pickle jar is fucking some I want to give a shout out to the people who are making people beautiful on it from Mike Doche to Joe Rogan to Lee side Beautiful motherfuckers. You understand me if it's not the strong bone. It's the shroom tech. It's not a vitamin It's a it's a way of life. It's optimization. It's making you better at what the fuck every time I go to that jiu-jitsu now I take two or three little shroom text. You got to see me doing those hip escapes like a fucking savage

Hey, let me let me give a call out to on it Joe got me some of the alpha brain Which I used not this year but last year at the World Series. Let me tell you something. That stuff's pretty good I give honest got some good products. They sent me some nice stuff. I like on it No, no, even doches and bevel them do me a favor man. You want to just snoop around go to audit calm Go snoop around see what they got they got kettle bells. They got ropes. You want to hang yourself get a fucking rope I don't give a fuck, but they got great supplements They got great stuff for you from the hemp force protein to the shroom tech. I mean they got they got What's the sugar they they got slilvia they got the that testosterone replacement guys go and read it

Whatever I tell you I'm gonna fuck it up. All I know is the shit works go to audit calm before you ought to press in church Church CHUR CH get 10% off down the list get on the stand stay on it program Get delivered to your house at the first of the month like a fucking soldier why fuck around you gotta leave You're gonna have to go down to the vitamin store and stand on like a fucking bumpy on the third fuck that shit Communisms over Elvis is dead. I don't feel so good myself. You don't need to leave the fucking house. Yeah, I'm trying to put this thing together I told my wife we eat lunch. She goes hold on order boom boom. She goes Amazon or get it there Friday. What's today? Thursday, I got that today. We didn't have to fucking leave the house That's how quick these motherfuckers are delivering delivery is up to a different level now. That's what everybody said

I didn't know what they were gonna attack. You know, you know why why because they're on it. They're on there on it Look at this. I you know Joey might I do a lot of things in life of my my best thing I say I'm best that is I'm best as a marketer That name on it. I love that name. I love that name. Don't fuck around. Yeah, that's pure marketing for a tremendous product Now you want to talk about a tremendous product you want to tell when I tried the other day What the trail mix with the dark chocolate and the berries smoke in nature box calm throwing heat at the motherfucker Nutritionally approved snacks. You sit there all day in your fucking office on your ass your ass smells from fucking potato chips The Snickers bars, you don't need that aggravation. Go to nature box got calm

See what they got to offer Lee count it off from the from the black and white granola To the I mean they got stuff that sourdough cheddar pretzels I'm telling you. Watch the cashews South Pacific plantain chips chili lime pistachios spicy pistachios Caramel pretzel pops a left one's good. Everything bagel sticks makes me potato fries Can anybody make pistachios in a bag out of the shell? Does anybody do that? They make them with the bag with the fucking shell and they make them spicy, but do they this nature box is delicious I wouldn't bullshit. No, I just asked. No, I'm sure it is delicious I like pistachios, but the shells are tough the shells are tough

Does it has anybody ever made a bag of pistachios out of the shells? Has ever seen that no just the shells no no no no no no no no that's no that the thing you eat inside the shell The seed whatever you want to call it has anybody ever made a pistachio product where you're getting a bag of the actual stuff You eat because you don't eat the shells do you The pants What on how high you are The pants I went high with type of teeth I got pregnant that week, you know If the Armenians were going to have a dental office

I don't know, I had a fucking shell You don't eat the shells, you eat the fucking thing But see now they crack like they're really tight You gotta get your tooth in there and your fang Fuck that nature box Re-puts it in oven and it cracks open like like a fucking clitoris when you lick that motherfucking it just opens up in the morning Like that and the one wing opens up, but the other one stutters just like that That's what nature box does so you don't have to fuck around

You're watching law and order you just stick your hand there Take a thing out and they crack right open That's my point If I can find pistachios that are as good as a fine clitoris I think I'm going to buy about a case Nature box got them go to naturebox.com Whether it's pistachios, whether it's a black and white granola You're gonna fucking love it

And you're gonna get how much percentage off 50% 50% on your first order Go to naturebox.com Press in Joey Joey, J-O-E-Y 50% off your first order

Joey, not 10, not 20, not 30 50 motherfucking percent off your first order Where you gonna get that type of action? Nobody takes care of you like the church or what's happening now Speaking of the church or what's happening now When I went to San Jose I saw my little fucking Cabanos from NailedItLife.com They gave me some fucking vapors

A little wax I took care of my friends But they also gave me a little present They gave me a new product they got The peanut brittle Did I tell you about the peanut brittle? You said I was going to get something but then it Well, next week when they come down

We're going to use some peanut brittle I saw the devil and the devil's cousin I told them both to get off the fucking plane They must have taken the parachute off And they fucking left me alone But that's Nailed It Life Whether it's the gummy bears Whether it's the peanut brittle

Whether it's the vapor pen The number one vapor pen out there in the market Tremendous guarantee If you call these guys They'll call you back Or they'll answer the phone What the fuck, Lee? They'll call you back

If you call them they'll call you back They'll call you back That's customer service I don't deal with fucking zombies If I got somebody fucking sponsoring me It's because when you call them They give you the respect that you deserve And they call you back

And they don't put you on the phone with some Hindu I can't know Abloh You don't need that aggravation You got shit to do All right On it NatureBox.com Nailed It Life

Support these people It's our 200 podcast We want to go straight up The fucking 400 league Can I get a little water for you? Yeah, sure Joey, if you don't mind my fucking Motherfucking scene

Jimmy Lee, can I have one? Yes Thank you Jimmy Lee, that's his name That's his new fucking name Jimmy Lee Why people bother me for Are you trying to sell me computers this year?

I don't bother nobody Buff Yes Gotta close this motherfucker I'll give me some closing arguments Whatever you're trying to tell me What's your message on life? You know

I know you're a busy guy I'm a busy guy But I, you know That's my own choice Maybe I'm a bit of an overachiever Or a workaholic, whatever But, you know, I got family to take care of And we're all just trying to live

And do life as best we can But I'm going to say it again Joey, to me, in life I believe we're all created equal I respect everybody for what they respect But the respect I'm not a religious guy When I tell you God bless you

It's because whoever your God is I hope he, she, it Whatever form they are in Blesses you Because that's your choice in life I treat everybody with respect And I like to be treated the same And I have no time for a-holes

And a very simple theory about life And I just want to be happy And I want I love helping people be happy I love seeing people happy I get tears in my eyes When people spin the lot of wheel And win 100,000 or a million

Knowing that it's changing Or helping their lives It's not going to my pocket It's going in theirs I'm the happiest guy in the world You know? It's just the way I am You've always been a gentleman to me

Your brother's always been a gentleman I remember I saw him at the premiere You said to me You just say hello I don't bother to know But I'm going to go over there And drop your name I know Bruce Lee Buffer

Fuck that shit Well, it's time I'll see you somewhere But you've always been a great guy And you know what? I started going to the UFC When I was fucked up, you know And Joey let me walk around And stuff and talk to people

Everybody's always been great It's... Everybody's always been great to me You're thirsty Can we get you something? Are you okay? You know? And that's always really nice

Well, it's that kind of attitude And the approachability of everybody From Dana White at the top Down to the fighters And everybody else Including Joe, who's a great attitude And I like to think I am too Very courteous to our fans

Because without them we're nothing And it's like that approachability Which you don't get in the NBA The NFL, the NHL With all respect to these fine athletes themselves You can't get LeBron James' autograph As he walks through the lobby But Chuck Liddell, you know

In the heartbeat He'll stop and sign 50 of them, you know And I'm not saying anything wrong with LeBron It's just the nature of the sport So the approachability in the sport of MMA And especially the UFC Which is MMA I think it's really been a big reason

Why it's grown exponentially so fast And so big We're looking at a sport That was created in 1993 in this country And has entered mainstream In my lifetime I've never seen anything do that It's the first time

So I'm very proud and honored And humbled every day I wake up And I know that I've got a UFC coming down That weekend or whatever I take great pride in what I do And I love working for the Fertitas and Dana And I love working with Joe He's a great guy

I've been working alongside Joe In the Octagon for about 16 years Or however long it's been And I think we should all just be very thankful For all these experiences That we've been able to receive And able to enjoy One thing that

In life you get to run All these fucking things every week And you gotta come up with fucking dough It's not when you and I were growing up You went to see a Sixer game for $12 And you got a hotlock of 50 fucking cents You want to go to a Laker game It's 250, it's 300 bucks

And that's without the car And the fucking steak And the blow And the fucking broad And the makeup And all the bullshit that comes with it I think about the average family income Of like around $51,000 a year

How can they afford a baseball game? A Dodger game for you to take your son to You know, your parking area You're talking a couple hundred bucks I was born at a great time And I was fortunate That I got to go to everything Even hockey games

I went to islander games I went to ranger games As a kid For $15, $8, $20 You know I go to a Laker game Like I said I've been blessed to win those tickets at that time

And I couldn't believe The tickets were $248 I would have paid for them And they were all the way the fuck up there But my point being If you ever have a chance to I don't care if you gotta follow Dana And win the tickets

Take them out of the fucking garbage can When you fucking meet shit at Starbucks What an experience What an experience No matter what level you're in At the UFC Because you don't know who's walking past you What time at those things

No, the music, your heartbeat And if you're lucky And you win floor seats Or the other seats If you watch Buffer If you watch The black referee, Herb Dean If you watch these guys

In between fights You guys are shaking hands with people As the fights are switching The fight camps are switching The one is walking out You're out there shaking hands Hugging people You know, Mario Yamasaki's out there

Everybody's out there hugging mother fuckers Dana comes in It's like Elizabeth Dana Walking into the business Everybody fucking claps And stands up And all of a sudden It's live

And it goes from It goes to three different extremes And you see it That doesn't happen at a baseball game It's a fucking baseball game You sit there to the seventh inning Some fat fuck gets up And sits in the national anthem

I got a stretch And I eat one of those communist hot dogs And I go home And I'm set a minus 300 With the fucking hot dog And I got to stop the fucking 22 Alka Salsas Because I'm bleeding from my foot From the diabetes for the fucking hot dog

You know, it's a It really is a great experience And I see you guys work And I've learned I've learned that It's a different time now When I was a kid I was a fan I always say this

When I was a kid I was a fan of Julius Irving I would go to the garden We would drive down to the spectrum And I would stand there And go look at fucking Julius Irving I had the pleasure to have dinner with him I had the pleasure to have drinks with him With my brother Michael

I had him announce the The Bulls in the Utah Jazz Final game in the championships When Jordan was sick In the first half scored 7 points And came out and scored over 42 In the first half And the second half scored over 42

To win the game in the series And that night we partied With Charles Barkley and Julius Irving I was in awe of you I don't get awestruck I don't get awestruck But this was Julius Irving Yeah, I was really

I was like, oh my god I was blown away I don't know how fast the times have changed Now the people that are fans of Chuck Liddell Could talk to him on Twitter Yeah, if Chuck Liddell is really cool He'll talk to you on Twitter Chris Cornell will talk to you on Twitter

You know, Julius Irving I follow him on Twitter and he tweets He fucking tweets I've hit him up a couple of times Then it hit me up But fucking think how many hits Julius Irving gets So I don't expect anything

But just the fact that we're in more contact With the people around us So now I pay for the ticket I sit at the UFC I'm not expecting nothing Honey, look who's walking towards me Michael Buffer and Herb fucking Dean I'm gonna hug them both

And get a picture Wait, Michael was there? Is that getting back at me Because I called you Jimmy? No, no, no, I'm sorry Oh my god The fucking reef is killing me I'm sorry

Hey, I'm his manager, man What's he doing there? Jimmy, Jimmy You're fucking me up And there's Bruce Buffer With a suit on Hugging people Taking pictures with women

And there's Uriah Faber Right behind them That doesn't happen No When you go to a Nick game And you walk in Carmelo, Anthony's hurt He doesn't walk up to you When they call a time out

And hug you And take a picture with you Joey, it doesn't happen at boxing either At boxing events You don't see that kind of interaction With the people You know, that are part of the boxing event You don't see them doing that

You know, there's It's just It's an amazing thing But I remember in the old days When it was like crickets We'd walk through hotel lobbies And it was crickets Nobody was doing anything

I mean, we're here Because of obviously the great Leadership and management Of Zufa and Lorenzo and Dana And Lorenzo's brother Frank Fertitta And all the great team they have together That's all a wonderful, wonderful given But I get back to it

The approachability and the fans Without the fans We are nothing And I remember when I was five years old Four years old, rather And in Philadelphia I was at the Marriott Hotel And this tall black man was there

Who I recognized Because I was watching boxing Out of the womb with my dad And his name at that time Was Cassius Clay Right So my brother Brian and I Who was six

We walk up to him We say hi He spent five minutes with us Talking to us Right I never forgot that For the rest of my life And I called that deer right here

That's the way I feel Every time I see a kid That asks for an autograph Much less an adult They paid for that ticket They deserve that experience And unless they're disrespectful Or ask me for an autograph

In the bathroom Which is man-law You don't do that Take the time And if you're selling t-shirts If you have sponsors These are the people That are going to buy your shirt

These are the people That are going to buy your product You know, hone your business Be a gentleman Be respectful And give these fans The fan experience they deserve How many fucking people

Come up to you when you're Dicking your head Unless you take a picture On a very like As an example I would say on an average night On show night Between going to the event

And then when I get back To the hotel On the way up to my room I would have to say that I easily sign Or M-take In the area of probably Two to five hundred

Different pictures and autographs You know, it can be that way In Vegas In Vegas when it's jammed On the average At least a hundred or more You know what happens When he leaves in Israel

He takes five to two thousand pictures Of fucking days of being a star None of us have any privacy In Vegas I mean, you know, Joe Myself, I mean, you know You go to dinner You get there

And I can't walk around Vegas on a UFC weekend Like when I'm at Vegas On a non-UFC weekend Buff, I'm happy You fucking came in tonight I'm happy you came in For the two hundred episode

I'm happy we're still here Making it happen I really enjoyed it I'm gonna have you on my podcast I didn't even know you To the podcast though It's not, I read it But I don't think he doesn't

I'm approaching Actually, I think we just did Our two hundredth show We're just about to do It's for four years now I can't, I try to do it live Every Tuesday at eleven Podcast one

Which handles Adam Caroll And Steve Austin Other than number one Goldberg Yeah, Goldberg Just joined their crew I just signed a deal with them This week

So my show's gonna be on Podcast one now Are you gonna take this thing Over there? Pardon me? Are you gonna take the Podcast there? No, they're good

Cause I do it on SureDog.com Is where I'm live Every Tuesday And we made a deal Where we will deliver the show To them But they want me to go

Do it over there I'll do a few shows there That's two hours out of the day But I'll be doing shows there too It's gonna be a Very wonderful experience Very excited about this I think we'll be going on

Podcast one within the next Four weeks I'm happy you came on I love you to death Thanks Joey Much love back to you Really appreciate it Bad motherfucker

Thank you for you guys The two hundredth episode Of the church Of what's happened now I wanna thank Annet From day one I wanna thank Nature's Box Nailed it life

I wanna thank Fucking Hulu Plus Who else Lee Dropping from Nailed it life Hulu Plus Dollar Shave Club All our sponsors

For always giving an escape pod Tank I love you guys over there Jeremy I love you guys Have a great weekend The live podcast Will be up this weekend

Sometime Don't fucking ask Thank you for watching Stay Black Buff Who loves you Joey Throw Jimmy a kiss

This is for you Lee I don't know A kiss to the man But it was more mental Than anything else But Joey I felt it

Joey thanks so much For having your program For all your listeners Out there Thank you for listening I'm gonna get you on my show I wanna have you down Thank you brother

Now that the show is over Remember go to NatureBox.com In order of great tasting Healthy snacks Snacks Smarter with healthy And delicious treats Like everything

Bagel chips And baked sweet potato fries Support this podcast And get 50% off For your first order Go to NatureBox.com Promo code Joey That's NatureBox.com

Promo code Joey And thank you On it And nailthelife.com Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you

Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you

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Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you

Thank you Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh oh I've been working from seven To eleven every night I say that kind of makes the love the drag, drag, drag, drag L always right now I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you

I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you I've been lovin' you, I've been lovin' you I've been lovin' you Sit up and cry, yeah, yeah Oh, my tears, it felt like rain

Don't you hear the, don't you hear the falling? Do you remember mama, when mama come on you go I said you had the nerve to tear me You didn't want me no more, yeah Open my front door, leave my back door slam You know I must have wanted a new bed, a new bed Oh, let the rain, let the rain, let the rain I've been working from sevens, sevens, sevens

You live every time, you're kind of middle of the grain Drain, drain Oh, yeah, baby drain Baby, since I've been lovin' you I'm about to leave, I'm about to leave, leave Just one more, just one more Oh, yeah, since I've been lovin' you I'm about to leave, I'm about to leave