Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #270 - Curtis Salcido, Joey Diaz, and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: April 2, 2015

Curtis Salcido, body builder, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt live in studio. This podcast is brought to you by: Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout. 
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Recorded live on 04/01/2015.
 Music:
 Sober - Tool Gimme Back My Bullets - Lynyrd Skynyrd

This show is sponsored by NatureBox. NatureBox tips great tasting healthy snacks right to your door. Forget the vending machine and start snacking smarter with healthy and delicious treats like dark cocoa almonds. Support this podcast by ordering a free NatureBox sample box at naturebox.com slash joey. That's right, free NatureBox snacks are found at naturebox.com slash joey.

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Iron Dragon TV is a brand new Roku channel. It's all your favorite martial arts movies. Use Cobra Joey to get two free rentals. Jesus Christ, little mighty. Let's start this fucking thing already. It's Wednesday night, April 1st, you fucking momos. Playing tricks like an asshole, this shit. Let's do this, the church, know what's happened now.

Pop suckers, what? Kick this motherfucker, Lee. Kick that mule, pop suckers. Oh shit. Lee Syads in the house. My main man. Curtis Salcedo's in the house. Oh shit.

You got some weed, you got some food. And you got the church, pop suckers. Oh yeah. There you go, little something to get you started. Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, what the fuck, Lee? What the fuck do? You playing games with me, or shit, 22 minutes to get the fucking computer warmed up.

And it took the normal three minutes. We've been here since 7.30, around fucking bound at the flag, I don't know what the fuck you're doing. I'm sorry. How you guys doing out there today? Welcome to the church, April 1st. Some guy tweeted me, what's the best trick you played on April 1st?

I showed your mom my dick, that's the fucking trick. Get it together, pop suckers, we're adults here. Really never egged a house, or tricked somebody. You do that on doubles night tonight, before Thanksgiving, you egged somebody's house. To egg somebody's house in April, you're wasting good eggs, you know what I'm saying? What's up, cock sucking?

Nothing, how was your day? That was all right, I had to go to the DMV, which sucked. But yeah, that's what you gotta do, I'm doing good. And you went to Santa Monica? Oh yeah. Fuck yeah, you didn't go locally, you making appointment? You had to make it, if you don't, you spend eight hours there. When I got there, this dude was next to me,

he had G-130, and they were at G80, and I was like, oh no, oh shit. So, I was like, thank God I made an appointment. That's when you abandon shit, fuck this, I'll come back here on Thursday. Curtis South-Sata, what's up Primo? How you doing, man? How are you, my brother?

Spoken to the mic, you have the same problem I got, we talking to the fucking hemisphere, and the people get pissed off. I mean, how are you, my friend? Good, Joey. What's happening? I'm not that much, thank you for having me on. It's an honor to bring you on,

a lot of people sit at home, who the fuck is Curtis South-Sata, we haven't seen him. I know you how long, five years now? Yeah. You met at the Bray Improv, we used to come to the Wednesday shows. That's right. You used to sit there and watch,

and I always knew you were learning something, like you were like, something, you were gonna be a public speaker, you were watching them, we used to talk on MySpace. Yeah. Right on MySpace, we used to talk, and I became friends on Facebook, and I'm watching, you were this big guy,

and all of a sudden, you're entering bodybuilding competitions and shit, and I'm blowing the fuck away. So, when I saw you took fifth, I wanted you to come on and tell these fuckers your story, but let's torture Lee a little bit. No one's gonna bother him. Look at, let's show your arms,

just so they can see on camera. Oh my God. He's a fucking savage. That's amazing. I don't even care if that sounds weird for me saying it. Look at that. How old are you now, Curtis? I'm 32.

So, when did the transformation hit you? Like, what were you doing that you said, you know what, I weighed 360 fucking pounds. It's gotta end. What, did you always wanna be a bodybuilder? No, I didn't wanna be a bodybuilder. I didn't wanna be one at all, actually. I grew up watching Arnold Schwarzenegger

and Sylvester Stallone, and wanting to kind of emulate them, be like them, be big and strong, but never really do bodybuilding, you know? But it was only probably about three years ago where I just, I reached 360 pounds. I was going through a lot of stress at the time. You know, I was going through a bad breakup

and I was kind of depressed. And what were you eating? I was eating fucking pizza every day and in and out, and I was drinking. I was actually drinking a lot. And, you know, when you drink alcohol almost every day, that's gonna add some pounds too, because that just converts into straight sugar.

That's what everyone says. Everyone says, when you stop drinking, lose weight, but I never drank, so I had no idea. So you're fucked. Yeah. Pretty much. Like me, we're both fucked, we don't drink. Yeah, I don't really drink anymore,

but I mean, at the time I was drinking a lot, I was partying a lot, and a lot of Del Taco, late night Del Taco. Oh, Del Taco's good. You know, but yeah, I've always, I've been big my whole life, and I've always been teased, and I've always been called fat boy, or...

That sucks. You know, just people saying I have titties and just talking shit, and you know, just the usual bullying, stuff like that. But I would say that the past, probably the past 12 years, I've kind of lost, I would go in spurts, I would lose weight, I'd get in shape, and I'd lose me about 20, 30 pounds,

I was doing a crash diet, and then I gained some confidence, and then I'd kind of slack a little bit, go back to my old habits, and then I'd get big again. But it was during those times, those brief periods of getting in shape, crash dieting, where I felt my best, and I had a lot of confidence,

so I saw these glimpses of how I could look, and how I could feel, and just like I said, I got to a pretty low point in my life where I, going through a bad relationship, bad breakup, and was drinking a lot, eating a lot, and then a lot of people, even as adults, not just kids, even adults, they treat you differently when you're fat

or when you're bigger and heavier. It's kind of like a different form of discrimination in a way, kind of like how someone would discriminate against a person of color or different religion. People like to point out your differences, make fun of you, so I just got sick of it, and I saw it, like I said, I saw glimpses of how good I could look in the past,

and I wanted to make a serious run for it, and I knew that 400 pounds was right around the corner, and I didn't want to wait to get to be that big, so I just decided to do whatever it takes to just lose the weight, and I mean, I tried it all. I tried every single diet in the book. Did you ever try one of those pills? I did liposine once for like a week.

It felt like it was speed. I bought that off TV, and I hit it in my sock drawer when I was in high school. It's fucked up, I did everything. I did NutriSystem, I did Weight Watchers, I did, what's the drink one, Slim Fast? I probably tried that at some point. Slim Fast, yeah.

It sucks. You said something interesting. Do you really feel that people discriminate? Yeah, absolutely. In what way, I'm in the workplace, or in the... I would say workplace, just being out in public, people, they just look at you and talk to you differently, especially being out at, say, like a club,

or somewhere out with your friends, girls especially are not really gonna give you the time of day, unless you have a really great personality, or you have money, you have a lot of other things going on. But if you're just an overweight guy, women aren't going to necessarily flock to you. Guys are gonna think that they're better than you just because they're skinnier than you,

or they have a better body than you. It's kind of like a one-upsmanship. I'm better than you because I'm in better shape than you are. That kind of thing. So I would experience that a lot. I don't know what it is, maybe because I'm a friendly guy, and people just think they could say certain things and I'll be okay with it.

It's like these subtle comments. You know, people find a way to call you fat or make fun of you in very subtle ways. So I just got tired of it, and I was like, you know what, I'm better than this. I'm not that fat guy that you think I am, so I'm going to prove you wrong, kind of. And it first started with trying to prove people wrong

and not wanting to be treated that way. And then it took on many different other reasons and motivations and stuff like that. But at first, it was just kind of like, I refuse to be treated that way. I'm going to do something about it. I'm going to change the way I look, and I'll show you type of thing.

I always thought that people looked at me weird in airports when I got on a plane. And listen, if I'm sitting there and I'm high on a plane and I see a fat guy walking on the plane, I'm like, good luck. Just because I know what it is to be a fucking fat dude. In fact, when I see a fat dude on Southwest, and he's got like a scene number,

that dude is going to ruin somebody's day. He's going to get in the fucking middle seat at the end, but yeah, you know, you ready to break out your fucking hoagie. And you can feel it, or I could feel it when I was walking down the aisle. Yeah, you can feel it. You're hoping you're not seeing next to them?

You know, you're a big guy, and I could honestly tell you, I never felt discriminated against, but I felt weird sometimes around certain people, just because of my own insecurities. But I think we do have a lot of fat people around, you know? And I was never, I didn't start getting fat too later on. I didn't get fat too, you know, every day I hear

a buddy of mine growing up, you know, when I was lifting weights, I'd always goof on him. And he'd go, wait till you're 40. Wait till your metabolism slows down. I go, my metabolism ain't slowing down, bitch. You know, and one day you wake up and you're 260, and you're like, ah. And then one day you wake up and you're 300,

and one day you wake up and you, you know, I did wake up at 418. I woke up one day, I remember going in for the longest yard and stepping on the scale of the doctor's office, and being like, 40 and going, what the fuck? I'm lying to you. The first time I went to the doctor for the physical, the scale only went up to 350.

It was one of those circular ones, and I remember him going, oh, you gotta be around 380. And then when I got to New Mexico, was when the guy had the fucking cattle scale, and it was like 410 or something, and I was like, when the fuck did this happen? And how did this happen? It happened so quick. It happened quickly, and I remember coming back

from the longest yard from New Mexico. When in New Mexico, I worked out a little bit, nothing. It wasn't really a workout. It was what a workout was in my mind, which was a lot better than most people. I would go and then do every body part. It's like the guy that goes in there and just do those curls and gets on the phone.

I don't even bring my phone into the gym ever. You have Jitsu, nothing. I don't believe, it's my hour, but. It's a good idea. I remember going to the Y the first time, and they paying for the Y, and then signing up for the training program to give you two training sessions for free, and the guy going, get on the,

not the elliptical, but the treadmill. And he put the thing on three, and I could only do two minutes, and I gotta get off, and he goes, listen, you gotta quit smoking, and you just gotta walk around for now. Don't even come back here till you walk around for that. But that was possibly my turning point. Like that was when I was like, wow, I can only walk.

I used to ride a bike across George Washington Bridge and back, and run, and now I can only do fucking three minutes. So when I met you, and all those Brayonites, you were around 360, and then you disappeared, and that's when you said, that's it. Yeah, I just kind of became a recluse in a way where I had to get out of that life, and just wasn't really

going out, or seeing a lot of my friends, and I had to be selfish, and I had to work out, I had to eat right, and you could still go out, and hang out with friends, family, stuff like that, but it's one of those things where I didn't want to be influenced by other people, and be peer pressured, and to, ah, come on, let's go get a pizza, you know, or let's go out.

There's always an excuse. You know what I mean, and you start compromising, and you're always gonna do it, you know, you just gotta kind of do your own thing, and you know, your real friends, and people that care about you will understand that, you know, they'll be in your life, whether. And the rest will go away, son.

Fuck them anyway, yeah. Now, what was your first diet, what was your first workout when you were at 360? First diet was, I did paleo, and I was doing, I signed up for jujitsu, and boxing, and I was doing the paleo, which is basically, all I was eating was steak, and veggies, and I guess it wasn't really true paleo,

because I know they eat some other shit, like nuts and whatever, but it was just steak, it was just meats and veggies, and I guess you can call it no carb, or keto, or something like that, but it was no carb, I was doing jujitsu, and I was just getting worked, and jujitsu, and boxing, I was just getting my ass kicked at, no energy. I was losing the weight, but I was also very weak,

you know, I didn't have the carbs to fuel my workouts, I was kind of just doing it wrong, I wasn't keeping track of what I was eating, how many calories, how many grams of protein, how many grams of carbs, and fats, and so on, so I was just kind of going into it blindly, and I knew that that wasn't working, it only lasted a couple of months,

I lost maybe about 15, 20 pounds, you know, but then after that I tried intermittent fasting, because you could eat a little bit more, but you can only eat through a certain window, so for example, if you have a six hour eating window, you can eat all your meals during that time, and you can be a little bit looser with your diet, you know, you can add some rice, and some breads,

and you know, all the taboo kind of carbs, you know, but yeah, I would just eat through this particular window, and I would do my workouts before that, though, I would do it in a fasted state, and you're supposed to burn more body fat that way, and it's a good way to get ripped, but I don't know, I think it kind of strips you of whatever muscle you may have,

also your energy level's gonna be pretty low, your insulin level's gonna be pretty low, your blood sugar's gonna be low, so you know, it doesn't work for everyone, it worked for me, it worked great, I actually used that for the majority of my weight loss until I got to about 230 pounds, and what's intermittent fasting, break it down for me?

Intermittent fasting is fasting, it's basically something along the lines of fasting for about 16 hours of the day, and usually people have an eight hour eating window, but some people do six hours, some people do four, and the idea is when you're not eating your, I guess your growth hormone levels are naturally gonna be higher,

and you're gonna be burning more fat, your insulin levels are gonna be low, insulin is a fat storing hormone, so your insulin level's gonna be low, so you're gonna be kind of in that fat burning state longer, and so, especially if you work out too, I mean, when you work out on an empty stomach, you're basically mobilizing all the fat

to be used as energy, so you're gonna be burning fat, and then once you eat after your workout, especially when you weight train, all the nutrients, all the carbs supposed to go directly to glycogen replenishment, go to your muscle stores, stuff like that, so it's basically burning fat on an empty stomach,

and then eating to refuel basically your depleted glycogen stores, so. Because somebody was telling me to get up in the morning, put sneakers on, and walk for an hour with nothing in your stomach. It's a good idea. It's fucking phenomenal for you. You come back after an hour,

you eat like a savage, or you eat minimal breakfast, but you got an hour. What is that hour of walking with nothing in your stomach do for you? A lot of people, there's different schools of thought, I mean, that's something a little more old school that people do where they do cardio on an empty stomach first thing in the morning,

and it works great for a lot of people, but it's supposed to just burn off the stored energy that you have, which is your body fat during that hour, because you have nothing in your system. You have nothing, no nutrients circulating in your bloodstream. You're not burning off breakfast or anything like that. You're just burning off your stored body fat.

And that's okay if you're doing cardio, and that's okay if you're doing maybe 30 minutes, 45 minutes, an hour is kind of pushing it, but if you're gonna weight train, you wanna have a good, intense workout, you wanna preserve lean muscle mass, probably not gonna wanna do that on an empty stomach, but cardio, I mean, a lot of professional bodybuilders,

a lot of people do that to burn fat, and they swear by it, and supposed to be really good for you. Some people will maybe just have a banana or a protein shake or something like that. It really depends. At the end of the day, a lot of people think it's calories in versus calories out, so if your calories are,

if you're burning more than you're taking in, it doesn't really matter when you do your cardio. That's what John thinks, you know? That's my bodybuilding, or our bodybuilding coach. That's what, that's kind of his school thought, is if you're burning more than you're taking in, you're gonna lose the weight. And so cardio, he prefers you do it

after you do weight training, but you can basically do it any time. And opposite, so if you train in the morning, so lift them weights, you should do cardio in the evening. Opposite your usual training time is what he suggests. Yeah, I mean, you could do that, or right after your workout, which after your weight training workout,

you already kind of depleted your glycogen stores, so what's left is body fat basically to work off of, so they say that's a great time to do cardio as well, which is when I do my cardio. I can't just wake up first thing in the morning and do that. I just, I'm really hungry when I wake up. I just can't function without anything in my stomach. So now you're 230 pounds.

Yeah, when I was 230 pounds after intermittent fasting, and after losing all the body fat, I was- Hold on one sec. I'm gonna take you to go down from 130 pounds. I'm gonna take you. Took about 10 months. I did, that's fast. Really fast, and I kind of regret doing that

because I do have some loose skin in my stomach area and other areas, stretch marks, stuff like that. Who knows if I would have had that anyway, but I know it definitely increased the chance or increased the likeliness that I was gonna get the loose skin. So- Have you thought about getting the surgery, the hair for the loose skin?

Yes, in fact, I really want to do that very soon. It's scary though. Like I've seen, like I watch, they have this show on TLC called Like My 600 Pound Life, and Paul and I watch it, and like it's intense. Like the ripping skin off of you, and like some people get really sick from it. So like I was, I still have about 80 pounds left

until I'm done losing weight, and I'm gonna have a lot of loose skin, but I don't know if I'm gonna have surgery to get rid of it. It seems like a lot of risk. Can you get rid of that loose skin? Oh no. Well, it is genetic. There's a lot of genetic factors to that.

Some people, they don't have loose skin when they lose a bunch of weight, even if they lose it really fast. But I mean, most people do, and they say that you can kind of just wait, kind of give it some time. You know, you lose the weight kind of maintain for like a few years, and it'll eventually tighten up,

but you know, sometimes people never lose it. And for me, I'm pursuing bodybuilding, and for this first show, it didn't show much, but you could still see it. And I know I probably got deemed a couple of points for the loose skin, so it's just something that I would definitely like to take care of. It's just, you know, I have a good physique,

but then sometimes like when I bend over to pick something up, the loose skin kind of goes over my belt, or you know, it just, it doesn't look right. It doesn't go with, it doesn't match everything. So that's a big reason why I just want to get rid of it. I have a weird question for you. Paul and I talk about it a lot. Like when you're just doing your daily activities,

do you feel any different than when you were 360? Like I don't, I felt the same as I do now when I was 315. I don't feel like, I look that different. I don't notice it until I look at pictures. So like when you're still walking around, are you still walking around like that 360? I'd still walk around like I'm 360 pounds.

Yeah, I have that mentality. I don't know if it ever goes away, or what, if it gets better, but I still feel very self-conscious. You know, it's still kind of tough for me to take my shirt off as silly as it may sound. I just did a bodybuilding contest, but I'm very self-conscious and I have that mentality. And I kind of feel like when other people are looking at me,

kind of like they're judging me, or maybe they still see the fat me or whatever. Yeah, it's weird. I was just talking to my girlfriend about that the other day, and yeah, she's lost a lot of weight as well, and she still feels like that big girl. And yeah, I don't know if that's something that'll ever go away. It's a good reminder, you know?

Yeah, it's a, like if I ever looked like you looked, I'd fucking wear a Speedo all day. Oh my God, that's like my job. I would, I would, I've never had like muscle, like that's so cool. But it's crazy how like I'm looking at you like you did it, but you're still, do you think maybe it's because we were fat as kids and like a little self-esteem?

Like Joey, you had like really high self-esteem as a kid. You were like a normal kid. So maybe when you're, maybe fuck you up when you're doing it as a kid. High self-esteem, I never had high self-esteem. Really? No, I just, I was really skinny and I wanted to have muscles.

You know, I was that guy that didn't kick sand in my face. I just wanted to be a little thicker. I used to take the, you know those slide doors that your parents have for closets, they have sliding doors, they wouldn't let me buy a bench. So I would take the sliding doors off and get two chairs and get fucking those sand weights. And I'd do bench presses and I'd have to hide them,

take them off the bar, hide them, put the fucking thing back up. I loved everything about weightlifting. I enjoy it as a kid. You know, it was as an adult that they say, you know, you should stop lifting, you're gonna hurt yourself, whatever. And then I stopped over the years.

I just didn't have time for it. But for me now, it's become a ritual. You know, I put the iPod on, I smoke a few fucking hits and I go to that YMCA, you're 10 people leaving as I'm getting in there. I get that bar, you know, I do, you know. So it's just, but you're at 230. And now you're like, I'm looking for something else.

What am I looking for in my life? Maybe I should start throwing some weights and be fucking guerrilla monsoon. Yeah, I would always look at fitness videos on YouTube. And then of course, in the related videos would be some bodybuilding videos. And the moment where I knew that I wanted to be a bodybuilder was when I saw Jake Cutler,

who is a former Mr. Olympia, a four-time Mr. Olympia, get on stage in 2009 after losing the title to Dexter Jackson, came back at his all-time best and just completely, completely just shocked everyone, hands down, just murdered everyone in that show. And I mean, the guy put on size, I mean, the guy's already huge,

guy came in great condition and was just like the ultimate. I told myself, you know what, I wanna look like that. And I wanna be like that. I wanna go on stage and I just wanna just rock the house like that. And it's just something that I didn't always wanna do, but I just saw the power and the energy

that was related with that. And yeah, I just, I had to do it at that point. I just, I had to at least try. And I didn't really pick a bodybuilding show at that point, but I started lifting. I started doing more bodybuilding-oriented exercises. I didn't hire John until this past August. So before then, it was just kind of like,

you know, trial and error and just lifting and trying to watch what I eat. I started tracking things on my fitness pal and I set certain macro goals, like certain amount of protein, certain amount of fat, certain amount of carbs. And it's funny, but after I got down to 230, I thought, okay, well, I'm gonna eat chicken,

brown rice and broccoli, and I'm gonna work out, right? And I ended up gaining 30 pounds of fat just by eating those foods. And I did that in two months. So I actually went up to about 260 and just, you know, eating quote unquote clean. How much chicken and rice were you eating? I was eating probably about seven or eight meals a day.

Oh my God. Damn. Yeah. You know, and I always heard, well, you gotta eat every few, you know, two, three hours. Have about eight ounces of chicken. Have about a half a cup of brown rice and some broccoli. You know? That must fuck you up when you like,

you gain 60 pounds eating healthy. Right. Like when you eat 60 pounds of McDonald's, you're like, okay, you thought you were eating healthy. Like fuck, I gained 60 pounds. How much did you gain to 60 pounds? What was it? Well, it was, I just started like looking up

bodybuilder or bodybuilding diets. And a lot of these guys would eat chicken, brown rice and broccoli. So I thought, okay, I'm gonna do that. And I didn't know that, you know, your body can only take in a certain amount of calories before, you know, before, you know, you start getting fat. I mean, just to maintain, you need a certain amount.

You got to do that with trial and error, but... Were you eating fried chicken? No, I wasn't. I wish I was. That would have been worth it. That's what I would do. I'd be like, all right, still chicken. Well, like a bodybuilder breakfast,

like a cup of yogurt, some fucking peanuts, you know, some skin, almond milk or something like that. And then for lunch, you have the chicken and a little cup of brown rice and the broccoli. And then for dinner, you probably have the same. How many fucking chicken breasts were you eating today? I was eating, I was eating at least six. I was eating at least six, at least six chicken breasts,

eight ounces a day. And I actually do that now, but my metabolism is so much faster and I have so much more muscle mass to actually feed that. I'm actually doing the right thing now. But then I didn't really have the muscle or the metabolism or anything like that. So I was just, I thought, okay, well, if I eat healthy,

if I eat chicken, brown rice and broccoli, I'm just gonna stay healthy. I'm gonna gain muscle, but I didn't think I was gonna gain weight that fast. And I didn't think it was gonna be just mostly fat. So it took some trial and error. That's when I knew I was like, okay, I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing

in terms of bodybuilding. So I had to seek out a coach. And that's where I learned that it's called IIFYM if it fits your macros is basically my coach's style of eating or having his clients eat. And that's, you have a certain amount of protein, certain amount of fat, certain amount of carbs that you eat each day.

And for the most part, you want you to eat whole food, stuff like that, but I mean, you can add in, they have popped hard in the morning or maybe some ice cream as long as it fits, it fits. It doesn't have to be boring, bland chicken, brown rice, broccoli, stuff like that. So I basically learned that by eating healthy, quote unquote healthy, you can still get fat.

And then by eating all these bad foods, you can actually get ripped. I mean, I got down to about 6% body fat and I was eating Captain Crunch and Candy Corn up until the day of the show, you know. Do you know what percentage body fat you were when you were 360? Just for like-

360. But you were a 6% Well, I was 410, I was 4 fucking 10, you know what I'm saying? There's no percentage, you're a fat fuck. Yeah, you're a fat fuck. I mean, there's no two ways about it. Now what's a macro? A macro is a macronutrient.

It's basically the, there's three macronutrients, protein, carbs, fats is what your body needs to I guess fuel itself. I mean, technically your body doesn't need carbohydrates, but you definitely need proteins and fats in order to properly function. So each person is different, each person has different metabolism, different needs.

So in terms of building muscle or maintaining muscle, you need a certain amount of protein per day. You do need a certain amount of fat for proper hormone function. And then carbs, I mean, some people go no carbs, but some people actually do better with higher fats, higher protein and zero carb than they do with higher carb, moderate protein, moderate fat.

So it really depends on, you know, your body type and what works for you. But those are the three things that basically fuel you. And carbs for the most part are your energy source. Protein is like building blocks for muscle and other things. And like I said, fats are just kind of hormone function and just other functions as well. But you know, carbs, we all love carbs, right?

Now what's the between white rice and brown rice? Like I've been eating wild rice and brown rice combined. It's not fucking bad. It's not bad. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. And the brown rice ain't fucking bad. You know, they need some beans. The brown rice couple of fucking black beans,

let it settle a little bit, ain't fucking bad. I gotta talk my wife into that. What between white rice, like pasta and whole grain pasta? It's basically, I guess just a fiber, more fiber. More fiber, so it's a cleaner carb. Yeah, it's quote unquote cleaner. There's usually more vitamins and more fiber and stuff like that with the brown rice

and the whole grains and stuff like that. But I mean, to be honest, it's not like your body can, it's not like your body has this mechanism where it says, okay, well this is a clean carb and this is a dirty carb. Now there are certain insulin responses. If you eat simple sugars, you're gonna spike your insulin, you're gonna get a bunch of energy all at once

and then you're gonna crash. And so people usually don't go that route. That's why they like the whole grains. It's more of like a steady type of energy. You're not gonna just get all hyped up and then crash. What about salami? What does salami do to a motherfucker, you know what I'm saying? I love salami, man, but unfortunately,

there's a very high fat content. I haven't had salami in the house in months. An American cheese and ham, and it fucking kills me at night, you understand? I fucking love it. My wife bought it over the holiday, salami. We kept it in the house for like a week. I'd take like two slices at night with a cracker.

I'd hold you over, you know what I'm saying? It just tunes you up. I don't need much at night. Like when I was 20, I'd go out and smoke dope. I needed a cheese motherfucker burger deluxe. Cheeseburger with cheese, with mozzarella on those motherfuckers and some chicken gravy, some disco fries.

I hate cheeseburgers without cheese. No, cheeseburger, I'm sorry, cocksucker, right? Maybe double cheese. But now at night, when I get stoned, I don't need to eat much. Really? But can you eat an apple? I mean, I like eating two apples at night, but they're like a lot of carbohydrates.

Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of myths too with eating, and that's one of those late night, don't eat anything before bedtime or close to bedtime or else it's just gonna magically turn into fat, but it's completely false. I mean, like I said, it depends on your macro count for the day. So if you've already had a lot of carbs throughout the day

and you have a couple of apples at night that could put you over the top, probably not gonna lose weight for the day, but if you haven't had your total carb allowance, then yeah, a couple of apples or whatever you want, I mean, within reason at night, you can have. It's not just gonna sit there and turn into fat and like a lot of people think.

Now, how do you spike your metabolism? You keep talking about the apple. After you were 230, you went up to 260. Were you working on spiking? How do you spike your metabolism by eating? Some people say you drink water when you get up to get the engine going, and then you go out and do cardio

just to straighten this fucking myth out. Yeah, a lot of people, the way they increase their metabolism and what I do is, or what I was doing was first thing in the morning, you know, you can have a little something to eat or on an empty stomach, you do some cardio, whether it be 30 minutes or an hour. First thing?

That's gonna get your metabolism going right off the bat. Then after that, you're gonna want to. What if you eat Captain Crunch? Just a little fucking bowl just so you don't pass out on the elliptical. You go down and you do 45 minutes. Does that work too?

That's what I do, yeah, I do that. I can't see X's, I get dizzy. If I get in the fucking car and I don't eat, that's like 30 minutes, I get dizzy, I gotta pull over and puke, I gotta go home and sleep the rest of the fucking day. I can't imagine jumping up and down with weights and shit on an empty stomach.

I don't even want to take the fucking chance. It's amazing the things you do. Like I would wake up, like, you know, they say now you gotta eat breakfast. I would do coke, I would wake up. I didn't want fucking breakfast. I wouldn't eat nothing until like five o'clock. No wonder you get to be a fat fuck because,

but now you get up and you're supposed to kick your metabolism open and eat something right away. You know, I used to drink soda for fucking breakfast. That's like death. That's like instant death because a can of coke, like a red can, fuck diet, that's what pussies do. If you're gonna bang out in the, listen, you wanna live like a doctor,

you open up a can of coke and a Marlboro red and open that motherfucker without brushing your teeth, then come talk to me right there. Those guys live to whatever. But I would have like a can of coke and I heard that's the worst thing in the world because it just makes your body crave sugar the rest of the day when you open up a fucking coke in a butted roll.

Well, it's about 40 to 50 grams of sugar, depending on the size and you know, it's gonna give you that crazy energy rush and then it's gonna drop your blood sugar, which you're gonna crave some more sweets to kind of get your energy back up. I mean, it's just like a natural process where your body's gonna crave that energy,

that quick energy because it took a dive so fast. So yeah, that pretty much explains it. But yeah, I mean, you do wanna have a lot of carbs when you wake up in the morning. That's when you're really carb sensitive because you've been fasting during your sleep. And so it really depends on your schedule. If you work out first thing in the morning

or if you're just gonna head off to work or you're just gonna lounge around. It really depends, but you should have the majority of your carbs first thing in the morning before you work out and after you work out. John wants 33% of your carbs before the workout or before you leave the house. I think he wants around 30% before and after your workout.

And then at other times, it's really up to you. But my personal belief is breakfast, pre-workout, and post-workout is when you really need your carbs. You're not gonna eat it at night when you're just kind of hanging out. You're not gonna need any kind of energy at that moment. You know, I mean, you can have different forms of carbs, but you're gonna need more like fast digesting

and the bulk of your carbs, pre-workout, post-workout first thing in the morning. Do you still enjoy food? It just seems like it's so like scientific to you. Like I can't imagine just eating chicken and rice and broccoli for 80 straight meals. I mean. I do, I enjoy it very much.

In fact, leading up into my contest, I had a couple of, I had a couple of binges where I got a little, got a little scared because I just kept eating like candy and stuff like that. And I just, the button just wouldn't turn off. And I just kind of eat for an hour or two. But my metabolism was so fast at the time, it just, it really didn't do anything.

I didn't, it may have halted my progress for the day or two, but it didn't really cause any kind of crazy weight gain. But yeah, I mean, I struggle, I still struggle with food and cravings and stuff like that. Not so much right now, but pre-contest. Yeah, that's when your metabolism is just revving. And you're craving everything in the book, you know? I had, you know, I was thinking about doing the surgery.

They called you, they got approved. So I got to call the doctor back with a date and then he's gonna call me and I'm gonna talk to him, we're gonna get on the scale or whatever. I don't really wanna do that fucking thing, you know? But I went to a couple of meetings and I did learn a few things from the meetings. And, you know, there's something about us,

especially us guys, you know, not this fucking skinny fuck over there sitting there. This guy could eat fucking in and out right now and gain and lose weight. They're not really good, yeah. You know, I love you, but there's just people who could eat whatever the fuck they want. And there's something, you know,

my thing didn't get, I didn't get, you know, heavier to my 30s. Let's get something straight that Lee has a problem with. I had a problem with. And I know Curtis has a problem with or had. It's the mind of a fatty. Listen, Curtis, I'm gonna look you in the face and tell you, there's some shit causing me right now, right now.

And it says, I'm gonna suck your dick with a fucking peanut in your hole and take theologies away from the next fucking child. That's a good call, right? Or I'm gonna make you the best two lobsters you've ever had. I'm gonna make you chicken cutlet parmesan, like you like it. I got dessert here for you. You know, bro, most American young guys would go,

they wouldn't even think of the food. I'm the type of guy that would think if I had a joint the fucking car. Like if I got a joint in the car, I'm gonna eat. I can blow job anytime, but a chef to make that for, that's the mind of a fatty. When I wake up in the morning, yeah, I have my day in my mind,

but I'm also playing on my menu as I'm pissing in the fucking shower. As the shampoo's in my head and I'm pissing in that hole, I'm thinking about the egg I'm gonna have for breakfast. Planning the menu is the best. And the potato, we plan the menu. We all do, we fantasize. This fucking guy, he was going for him and his girlfriend

30 days, 90 days on a diet, they lost 80 pounds together. And they did the, you know, I tortured him, but in my mind, I know the mind of a fatty. They went to what, just barbecue wings. They went to pizza revs or something else. No, no, no. Go on the roll, like disgusting motherfuckers. No, okay, let me set it up from a less high person.

So we lost like 70, 80 pounds each. We started in June, it was for Valentine's Day. And we used to love to go to Buffalo Wild Wings. We used to love getting, what was it? Oh, BJs? In and out, in and out for lunch. And BJs, the fucking cookie, which is a killer. So that was all the stuff that we missed.

So after losing 80 pounds, that's what we did for Valentine's Day. But oh my God, especially when I'm high, that set me back, I probably would have lost 40 more pounds if it wasn't for this stuff. Cause I'll go home from nights like this and I'll have two, three dinners. It's just crazy.

But at the end of the day, us three have the mind of a fatty. Always. And that's the first switch before the diet kicks in. That was the main thing is really, and then some people, you fight the mind of the fatty. Some people just go, like me, listen, I've had a million chicken colors.

I've had them by people that can't even speak the language the shitty ones. You know, how many more chicken colors do I need? How many more, my drug of choice, besides getting my dick sucked in cocaine, my third drug of choice is New York Super Fudge Chunk. You just take the whole thing, let it melt a little bit. While you roll the joint, you leave it on the stove.

Like your wife cooked dinner, but you just put it on the stove when it's still warm. You roll that fucking number, you heat that motherfucker up. You have like bullets over Broadway or something on HBO. Cause I had done, that's the mind of the fatty. The fatty will throw the movie in to trick you to eat something while I have to eat some lethal weapons How the fuck am I not going to eat print is on?

You know what I'm saying? Fucking the original longest yard is on. What the fuck do you mean you ate that pizza for fuck? I told you that there was leftovers. That's the mind of a fatty. And that's what we have to switch first. Once that switch is gone, until I had to work on it. When I lived in Jersey, where, you know,

at two in the morning guys, I could look in the face and go, we go to the Greek diner and have a cheeseburger deluxe on an open steak sandwich, the best you've ever had. Or we're eight minutes from New York city. We go to Chinatown. That's a fuck. That's why I left New York city.

People always go, Julie, because of the warrants, I left because of availability of two things that would kill me, drugs and food. They would kill me. If I could go to you in New York, do you want a Cuban sandwich? Victor's Cafe is open till five. Last time I was in Victor's Cafe,

Roberto Duran walked in with lines of coke in his nose. His nose was fucking pale white. Like somebody had just put paper in his nose, with a suit on, with blood on it. Going to get food at five in the morning, after like a three day fucking binge. That's me. If I come to your house at five,

that's, this is the mind of a fatty. This is the mind of a fatty. If I knock on your door at three in the morning, and I go, Curtis, open the fucking door. What do you mean? Joey, it's three in the morning. Get the fuck out of here. Curtis, I brought tacos from King Taco,

the Chicharron with potato. You would actually fucking open the door and tell me how I'm a cunt. But you're lucky you brought the tacos over. Come on in. You bring rolling papers too? I got no rolling paper. That's the mind of a fatty.

That's what we have. That's the worst disease we have. Yes. You know, when I talk to you, when I wake up in the morning, I know my menu. Your wife ever come up to you and go, I'm going to Rouse.

What do you want from Rouse? What the fuck do I know? It's Tuesday. I know what I want today. Tomorrow, I don't know. When I wake up tomorrow and I smoke that joint, that's when that flavor's going to come in my mouth. Ooh, some fucking meatloaf with mozzarella in there

with some fucking mashed potatoes and some cream corn. Oh, nice. Oh, the cream corn. That's the mind of, oh, yeah, some cream corn, though. Yeah. That's regular corn? That's parameters. Put the cream in there.

We're fatties. You're fucked. That's what we're talking about. Anybody can eat cream corn. You can join the Marine and go to prison and get regular corn. I'm talking about cream corn. That's what fat people do.

Isn't that just in cans on the shelf? Who gives a fuck? You put butter and salt on that motherfucker. And it's magic. You dope up cream corn with some fucking pepper and some butter. And you give me shit for hummus. You give me shit for liking hummus.

Listen, please, don't get me started, but I'm having a nice time, be careful to see it. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, my goal each and every day is just to not gain weight. And I'm just trying to maintain at the moment, but it's so easy for me to gain weight. I mean, I just, I look at food and I put weight on. And it's good if I'm trying to put muscle on,

but it doesn't always just go to your muscle. And it's one of those things where I, like I said, the goal right now is to not gain weight each day and to not go ape shit and get a pizza. Like I want to eat pizza every day. I want to eat chocolate cake and fucking chocolate milk and donuts and all that shit. If you could wake up with no guilt,

what would be your ideal menu? Kick it. Breakfast. Ideal. I'm going to ask you two, Lee. Look at me, he's turning pale right now. Hit me. What's your ideal fucking day?

The real deal. You don't smoke weed. Occasionally. If somebody has a bone, you'll work. How you feeling over there? I didn't talk to you, cocksuck. I'm talking to our guest. I don't give a fuck about you.

My goal, thank you. So you want another piece? You can't walk on one leg. What's your ideal day, Tarzan? Hit me. Ideal breakfast would definitely be Krispy Kreme donuts. Jesus Christ.

You know, just the whole box of the original glazed or... That's easy too, those are like light, delicious. Yeah, I mean, I could easily eat the whole fucking box too. And, or, you know, go to a pancake house, get a bunch of fucking chocolate chip pancakes, some Krispy Bacon, you know, maybe a bowl of chili. Maybe like five eggs over easy. You know, hash browns, all that shit.

This is with the Krispy Donuts? Yeah, I mean, you know. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, it could be at the same time or maybe just wait a little bit and have round two for breakfast. I mean, yeah, that's what I really want for breakfast. Lunch.

Lunch, lunch would be, I would have to say pizza. It would just have to be pizza from Pizzamenia in Whittier. Jesus Christ. I mean, Orgondolas in La Mirada is probably the best pizza I've ever had. What do you get, pineapples and pepperoni?

I get pepperoni, sausage, olive, extra sauce. Oh, Jesus Christ. Extra sauce? A couple wings while you're there. Yeah, get some wings too, get some barbecue wings or, you know, maybe the mild ones, you know, with some, maybe some ranch. No blue cheese, take those cheese chunks out of that,

motherfucker. What's the snack, afternoon snack? You had lunch, it's 3.30, you smoke a half a bone, you go to your buddy's house. Oh, this is gonna kill me tonight. Have a snack, I would say the snack, probably some nachos. Make some nachos with, I always like Velveeta cheese.

Jesus Christ. You know, I can't do the regular cheese. There's just something special about the Velveeta cheese. I was a king in high school of tortilla chips with like just like the shredded cheddar or Mexican blend that you put on top, I'd do like six layers of them. Oh my God.

Dinner. Dinner, probably lasagna or lasagna or maybe some enchiladas somewhere. But either Mexican or Italian. Now one question for Lee real quick, this whole body building world, fat losing world, Mexican menus offer nothing for that world, correct? The Mundo.

If you're trying to lose weight, Mexicans don't have anything that's fat free, nothing. I've done weight watches, you go to a Mexican check and it just has a skull and two bones. Yeah, pretty much, I mean, you can always maybe get some carne asada or some chicken and maybe some beans and rice, not the refried beans, but maybe just some, even the rice.

The Mexican rice, even the chila. They put butter in it. I think it's eight points for half a cup of weight watch Lee. What's up buddy? Your ideal fucking day breakfast, hit it. All right. The truth.

I agree with the talk of chip pancakes and bacon or I love fast food. Like that's gonna be a lot of mine. If you could get like an egg sandwich, but I like McDonald's hash browns, like they're crispy. I don't like the potatoes glowed up their hash browns. Those aren't hash browns. I like to take the hash brown and put it in the sandwich.

That's my breakfast. Juice, soda. I love Diet Coke with breakfast, but no, if it's my ideal, orange juice. All right, lunch. While we're young. Yeah, I'll say go to the counter, like a nice burger place.

Get like a nice cheeseburger with bacon, egg on top, fries, that's pretty good. Snack, first one of the day. I really like those notches. I used to do those notches all the time. Like I said, like maybe like chocolate chip cookies or cheez-its, cheez-its for my shit. Good.

Chinese food, General's chicken with some dumplings and an egg roll. And then you gotta have some dessert. Late night. Peanut M&Ms or just a peanut butter sandwich. I love peanut, like just two pieces of wheat bread with a peanut butter on each side. And it's just that same, oh.

Ideal food, for Uncle Joe. Are you ready? Okay, do it. Breakfast, two eggs, sunny side up. Two, three, four, five pieces of white bread with heavy-duty butter on those motherfuckers. Three, four pieces of bacon and some potatoes, fried to the max with Frank's hot sauce on it.

Oh, nice. All right, and some juice and maybe a can of two or Coca-Cola, all right? Fucking lunch, I gotta do pork fried rice, heavy-duty shrimp and lobster sauce, two egg rolls, couple appetizers and fucking three or four cans of Coke. That's life right there.

Maybe at the end, a glass of water just to clean out the digestive tract. The first snack of the day, what the salami and American cheese sandwich on white with mustard. What kind of mustard? Yellow, white people muster the American cheese. The bland shit, no, you don't even need the spicy mustard.

For dinner, maybe six or seven fried chicken cutlets breaded with mashed potatoes, with fucking tons of butter in it, salt and pepper, some cream corn and some fucking cranberry juice with some club soda over ice cubes. You understand me going deep. Then after you get home at night,

my night, this is what I could settle for. This is my ideal day. A nice thin vanilla shake at night right before you hit the crib like a doctor with some fucking Brian's ice cream with the black little dot in it. But the truth, my late night, the dish, open steak sandwich on white bread

with a little butter on the bread with the gravy from the steak dripping on the bread over motherfucking steak fries. You understand me? With a cream of turkey soup to open up and a milkshake on the way out. That's Uncle Joey's fucking utopia right there. That's how you do it.

That's my utopia. If I could find a bar that would serve to two, cause about two 30s when I get the urchin for a nice steak. Anybody could go to sleep with a fucking hot cocoa. Or a fucking, what's the, let me get the tea, the grape coupon. Listen bitch, in this fucking house, we're doing a fucking T-bone.

You know, I grew up in a Cuban house where my mom would come home at three and go, you hungry? And within 30 minutes, it'd be a four course fucking meal. You know, and you eat that shit and there's only one way to go is to bed. You eat one of those meals at three in the morning. There ain't no fucking exercising

or burning glycogen or nothing. You're hitting glycogen after that one pull of the fucking helmet. Cause you're a good whacking off after a good meal late night. Like at four in the morning, you close that door, wait till your mom closes her door. You put that little lock on your door

and take that playboy on. You beat that dick up for 20 minutes and shit. You get that little diabetic rush and shit, it's all over. Lee, fuck it. You can't walk on one leg. All right, so now you hook up with John, it's August. What's the first competition you're looking at?

So the first one I was looking at was the Gold Coast Championship in February, this past February. But John didn't think I'd be ready for that. He likes to take his time. He doesn't like to crash diet people. He likes to, he's shooting for about one to two pounds of fat loss per week.

So he just didn't think I'd be ready. And so I said, okay, how about the San Diego Championships in March? And he said, okay, I think we could probably do that. And yeah, from there, I mean, looking back on it, I don't know how I got into such amazing shape so fast. I mean, I started out at about 19% body fat in August and got down to about five to six on the day of the show.

And yeah, it was crazy. What was your training regimen at first? It was a combination of upper and lower, basically strength training days, and then take a day off, maybe do some cardio, like some high intensity cardio on that day. Also do cardio on the upper and lower days. And then the other three days that I would lift

for the remaining of the week would be more kind of like time under tension. So you'd kind of do like slower movements. So you would, you do slow negatives on the way down and then explosive movements on the way up. So concentric, eccentric. So basically, I guess you can call them like polishing off kind of movements, you know, going for the pump,

stuff like that. And it worked great. That program is an awesome program that John came up with, I guess, or maybe, you know, mastered. But yeah, it definitely worked for me. I was doing a program similar to that before I started with him. So it's just the full upper body and the full lower.

That's pretty tough. I mean, you'll be able to do it. So the upper on Monday and the lower on Tuesday. And then a day off for cardio, and then Thursday again, and Friday again, and two days off. It would be, Thursday would be back and shoulders. Friday would be legs just not going as heavy. And then Saturday would be chest and arms.

So you would hit each body part twice in that week. But one day you're doing it really heavy. You're really, really lifting heavy, kind of lower, lower sets, lower reps. And then the second time you do it, you're doing higher sets, higher reps. And of course, lower weight, but it's, and it works, you know?

It's just, I think it's the combination of the different muscle fibers you have and how lifting heavy you're gonna, you're gonna promote that growth, that muscle growth. And then kind of when you lift lighter, but more reps, it's just more of getting blood in the muscle. And I guess you're still stimulating growth, but it's more of kind of a fat burning movement

at that moment. But I don't know, whatever it is, whatever the exact science is, it fucking works. So you did that, you went from 260 to what, at this point? So I went from 260, basically between August and the day of the show. Well, between August and February I went down 30 pounds. So I went down to about 230,

but I was getting way too, I was getting way too flat, way too small. So I started eating a little bit more. I mean, I was on maybe about 100 grams of carbs a day, you know, and I was lifting pretty heavy and I was in cardio eight days a week, or eight times a week. So one of the days would be two cardio sessions and a weightlifting session.

So John was really having me, I mean, he was killing me. And I said, I kind of took things into my own hands towards the end and I just started kind of feeding myself a little bit more. And I did what a lot of bodybuilders do and they kind of grow into their show. So they'll be ready a few weeks before the show.

They'll drop all the fat they need to drop and then they'll start incorporating like more carbs into the mix. And you kind of fill out your muscles and you get a little bit bigger and fuller on the day of the show. And that's what I did. And he doesn't know that,

but I had to take things in my own hands because I feel at the end of the day, you know your body better than anyone else, you know? Well, what you know, combined with his knowledge, mixed somewhere in the middle, it'll work out for you. Now you have a posing coach, a diet coach. Yeah, I have a, John has diet and strength conditioning, but you also have a posing coach.

Yeah, I have a posing coach, his name's Stevie Rivera. He works at Elite Fitness Zone in the city of Orange. He's a former Mr. California. And that's just an amazing, amazing posing coach. I mean, I can't dance. I have no rhythm, anything like that. I came in there stiff as hell, probably about seven weeks out.

And he worked with me and I had a pretty good routine out of it, pretty fluid. And I had some rhythm up there and, you know, really kind of polished me off in terms of my posing, so I'm thankful for that. I mean, it's amazing all the different kind of coaches and things that you need to do a bodybuilding show. So I had John, which was my nutrition

and basically weightlifting coach. I had a posing coach. I also, I'd get massages, you know? So I'd have this lady that would give me a massage every week, you know, nothing extra, nothing like that. But just, I would go tan. What do you get graded on, I guess, when you're bodybuilding?

Like, what are you trying to improve? One of the most important things is symmetry. So you kind of want everything to be even. You want both sides of your body to match up. So you don't want like, you don't want your biceps to be the biggest thing on you and it doesn't match up with your triceps and your shoulders and your chest.

You kind of want everything to be proportion. And then conditioning, when you step on stage, you want to be no more than like 6%, 7% body fat. And then, of course, you want to be big too. So you want to be big, proportion and shape. And then, of course, tan and posing and all that stuff comes into play too. But it's, today, it's more of a size game.

Conditioning, the athletes in the sport today, they're kind of lacking in their conditioning. They're just mass monsters, but... What do you mean when you say conditioning? Because when you hear, when you're watching a football game, you think conditioning or UFC and they don't have like the energy to do, to fight or to play the game,

why do you need so much energy for this? I understand why you're working out, but during the competition, how can they tell? What I mean by conditioning is like, how conditioned the muscle, I guess, looks. So, yeah, just the appearance of it because bodybuilders in all reality really aren't the greatest athletes.

I mean, for example, I went on a run yesterday, I could barely run. I mean, I was huffing and puffing. And right now, I mean, I'm probably at about 9, 10% body fat at the most, and I could barely run. I mean, my cardio, it's just different forms of cardio. Bodybuilders are definitely not performance athletes. It's just, there's just certain ways

to get your body fat super low, and bodybuilders know how to do that, but it's in terms of actual energy and performance and stamina and stuff like that, it's very lacking. Well, the muscles need a lot of oxygen to keep those motherfuckers alive. What's his name? What was the black guy in the UFC

that came up killing motherfuckers? Alexander, remember the guy from Poe on Nebraska, black guy, looked like fucking Ken Norton, he came out, but he would gas out by the second fucking round. A lot of the big guys, because it takes a lot of oxygen, it takes a lot to keep those muscles fucking going. So, and you look at a guy like Curtis,

and you're like, oh, he could probably run 10 miles. And he's saying, he's huffing and puffing the same way you would probably huff and puff, because even the weight, when I run, I huff and fucking puff, because yeah, the weight. I've done the elliptical almost six days a week, probably since June, and if I have to run to catch a train or like a subway, I'm like, yeah, nothing.

Well, everything requires different conditions, like when you kick box. But you think you're running when you kick elliptical. Yeah, you think, I remember I used to kick box at the place, and I was like, oh my God, I'm doing rounds. Like, I'm doing three minute rounds, a minute, breathing, going back and doing. And all of a sudden, I went to Jiu-Jitsu,

and I thought I was gonna fucking die. Like, I thought I was gonna fucking die. Like, everything, you know, boxers have tremendous cardio, but they go on their back and shit, and it's a complete different fucking game, and you have to keep going to build that endurance up. You have to, you know, so everything, but once you get to that conditioning for that one,

like you could be, I think the best conditioning, for me, would be if I could like roll 10, five minute fucking rolls, which I would have a heart attack. But I guarantee, if I went to play basketball, I would gas out after two or three wind sprints. What sport do you think was the hardest to train for? Like the hardest during practice?

For me as a child? Yeah, or anytime. It depends, I had a freshman basketball coach that the first four weeks of practice, you didn't see a basketball. Oh yeah, it's just conditioning. He just made you fucking run around like a gorilla, like the defense, like with your hands touching the floor,

and he taught you defense, and wind sprints. You know, you have guys that believe, and you know, if I was a football, yeah, conditioning's gonna win the fucking game. In the fourth quarter, who's gonna win the game? The guys aren't breathing heavy, they don't have their hands on their heads, they don't have their hands on their waist.

Right. So that's what you go for. To me, what I thought was the hardest, what I saw was wrestling. I saw those kids in my wrestling high school. They ran stairs for two fucking hours. You leave to practice football, they'd be running. You come back, then they're running.

Then they'd start wrestling, and the room would be 200 fucking degrees. I quit. I don't need to stagger running fucking stairs. I walk up and down these motherfuckers all day with books in my hand. I was never good by wrestling for six years. I've been going back and forth.

I think football is harder for me. I only played freshman year high school. And those summer workouts, when it was just those kills, like those drills with those pads, I think was worse than wrestling. At least for me. Let's remind this.

Yeah, I would agree with you grappling. Like Jiu Jitsu was definitely, Jiu Jitsu and boxing were the toughest sports that I've ever tried to master. Are you still Jiu Jitsu-ing? No, I haven't for about maybe a year and a half, but I was training almost every day. And I loved it.

I was just getting nagging, these nagging like elbow injuries and shoulders. Some guy will try to do a fucking Americana on you and really crank your arm and you just get fucked up in that sport and I mean, it's really fun. You're a bad motherfucker after you've done it for a few months and you kind of get your wind and you get some skills.

I mean, the greatest feeling was choking a guy out for the first time, you know, rolling. But I mean, it just kind of, kind of eats away at you, at your joints, you know. I mean, I was 30 years old when I first started. So there's a lot of young guys in the class. A lot of young guys, that's what, I go twice a week, that's all my body can handle.

With the lifting and the kettle, it's fucking tough. It's tough. It's really tough. I mean, I really enjoy it. Hopefully one of these days I can get back into it, maybe kind of ease back into it. Boxing was really, I mean, I couldn't spar for more than a minute, you know.

I mean, that boxing, you're getting hit, you know, and you're throwing punches and it's just very taxing. Very taxing. So those are definitely the toughest sports that I have ever done. And I've played basketball in high school. I'm a black belt in Taekwondo. I've trained for certain runs and, you know,

weightlifting, bodybuilding, stuff like that. And jujitsu and boxing are definitely the toughest. Or, you know, MMA basically would be the toughest sport, I'd say. Now this contest, how much did it mean? This was your first fucking contest. Were you nervous? Yeah, I was nervous.

I was very nervous actually, but I just felt like the closer I got to the contest, the more support that I had. I had no idea all the people that were kind of following me on Facebook and Instagram. Yeah, I was following, I was really interested. I was like, wow, this guy's looking, just the story's great.

360, 230, you're in a bodybuilding contest. At that point, don't matter, even if you're fucking placed, even if you're coming last, you know, it's just doing what you did. That was mind-boggling to me. I love all this shit. I love when, you know, we live in a country right now that's fat, but what the other side, we're lazy.

You know, how many times you go to the gym and you see a guy that's trying to lose weight, he ain't doing nothing. Dicking around, he's doing a couple bench presses, and you want to say something, but then you're like, it's none of my fucking business. I'm struggling too. But it's really weird when you learn how to work out.

And when you learn what works for your body and you start shedding the pounds in your life. And you get that momentum going and it just starts coming off so fast. Yeah, it was an unbelievable transformation because I never thought in a million years I would look the way I looked. I mean, I was always hopeful and I saw glimpses of potential

and I had, like I said, hopes and dreams and stuff like that. And I was confident, but I just, I really had no idea. I mean, I always carried a lot of fat, like in my chest and my stomach. I never had a six pack in my life. I never thought I could get one. And I ended up getting one, except for like the lower part, I did have some loose skin.

But, you know, what are you gonna do about that? And then my chest always had, you know, what they would call man boobs my whole life. And then all of a sudden, the closer I got to the show, it just started kind of shaping up until like a nice, well-rounded chest. I never thought in a million years. I always thought, you know, I'd have to get some surgery

or, you know, I'd have to get some fucking body sculpting or something like that. And you have a day job. Yeah. And you also, in school, try to get a master's degree. Yeah, and I'm a full-time student, pursuing my master's degree in sports, exercise, psychology. And I have a girlfriend and, you know, family.

My, you know, I live with my dad. And yeah, I mean, I have a lot going on. There's a lot of shit going on. So it's not the easiest thing to do to prep for a bodybuilding contest when you have to go to work and then you got to go to school. You know, you got to, you have no energy for anything.

You know, and then you got to write a report or you got to deal with some customer at work or, you know, your girlfriend wants to go out. You know, she wants to do things, you know. And it's like, your energy is just not there. And it's tough. You get spread really thin, really thin. People always send me emails.

I answer emails on Sundays and people always ask me, you know, hey man, when are you gonna have a listener? Come on, the fucking show, whatever. I know you're not a listener, but I knew you years ago and I had to tell you something really proudly and I wanted to put you on the show because people always bitch, bro.

You know, people always bitch about what they can't sacrifice and they good and what they can't. And look at all this shit you do. This is your first contest and you pull a fifth overall and second in your weight class. Yeah. You know, you could do anything. People could fucking do anything.

And it's amazing once you put your mind, like I said, once you realize we've got the mind of a chubby, let's turn that off, let's switch it a little bit. Instead of waking up in the morning, a cheese sandwich, let's not think about the menu. Let's think about fucking getting my dick sucked or smoking a joint, something different, you know. And then going to the gym is something completely different.

Like walking into a gym when you're fat, I've been doing it for the last 10 years. It's embarrassing for a minute and then you get like this edge of respect. People are like, hey man, you know what? You're in here. They don't have to say it to you. Every once in a while you get some dick head

that walks around like, you know, he did three pushups, who gives a fuck? You know, I'm talking about when people see you, they go, hey man, so what? You came in here with a fucking t-shirt on, you got big titties and, you know, you smell like fucking ice cream and bacon. You know, because when you're on that treadmill,

you could smell the food coming out of your fucking pores. Ice cream and bacon? Fucking shit, that's what fat people eat. Well, you think they're at home eating celery sticks and fucking, you know, nobody sweats out fucking celery sticks and fucking granola. You know, fat people smell out like ice cream and chocolate and fucking peanut butter and fun shit, you know.

You smell the fat dude's neck by like seven o'clock and see what it smells like. You don't smell like dirt or sweat, it smells like fucking the 7-Eleven candy counter, like when you walk on this fucking counter, minus the fucking dude behind the counter. Hold on one second, let me give some shout out to you. Oh my God.

I know you guys got a long ride back. What, cock sucker? It's never fat, man, it's neck. Yeah, you smell a fat, I used to, bro, I remember, when I was 400 pounds, like when I was doing blow, after I got clean and I started exercising, I was throwing away shirts one day and I found a bunch of fat man's shirts

and you could see, like you ever see a coffee filter? That's what my armpits were sweating. Like God knows, there was McDonald burgers and fucking tacos from, you know, cause I used to do comedy for 10 different reasons that night. Like when Rudy Moreno or Felipe and those guys called me and said, we got a Mexican room for you, I'd go for the 50 fucking bucks, yeah.

And I'd go for the comedy and the art, yeah, that's great too. But I knew on the way, I could get a fucking tremendous rocket coke in Mexicanaville for $20 and I always stopped at King Taco. When you're planning gigs around the menu, that's when you know you're a fucking fat fuck. You know, I'm going to Houston in three fucking weeks, four fucking weeks.

Only fat people go to Houston. That's what fat people buy clothes. Fat people in California, like if you're a fat dude in California, you buy a 2X, you're gonna die. Like they really make a 2X. Go to Texas and get a 2X. You can fit a fucking family under that shirt because they don't make you feel guilty.

We want you to be a fat fuck. I'm going to Texas in three weeks. That's why I don't want to bring you Lee, you'll bust. I will. You snapped an Austin, I can't imagine what happened. I didn't snap, I want to get one thing. They got fucking pizza from New York and Houston. They got anti-Chang's dumpling palace.

That's the name of the restaurant. That sounds amazing. Anti-Chang's dumpling palace. Cause they're not that bad calorie-wise. I don't know if they're bad for your macros. Yes, they're fucking bad for everything. There's pork and cat in there. No, do you mean to be a fat Asian person?

Because they do kung fu and tai chi, you don't do either. It's Japanese, it's like that kind of food, Asian food and male training food. You don't get fat eating that, that's... Liam, why are you insulting me? They do kung fu and tai chi. Liam, one fat Chinese person, you know. Bolo.

All right, enough said, all right, fucking. What's the dude who had the TV show? He was an enter the dragon. In the beginning, Bruce Lee chokes him. That's fucking Ben, whatever his name was. He was young, I would all bunch up. Anyway, why are we bringing personalities into the fucking TV?

I bought a shout out to my main fucking ISIS dude, Hamil Haddad. He was a fucking ISIS. Hamil, I love you, cocksucker. Paul Lynch, I love you. Jamie Stanley, Liya Hernandez, John Robinson, AB, Ring Khan, Tony Mac, John Wolf G, always there for me.

And Lance Armstrong, fucking Junior, whatever. He's not related to the fucking steroid guy. He's like his second cousin or something. Who gives a fuck? What, what, cocksucker? What are you looking at all be the eye for? He gave me so much. You motherfuckers, all you Jews get all creepy

after Wednesday before you start acting all weird. You start looking at me and scheming and shit like that. No man, what you did was fucking tremendous. What you did was tremendous. I'm sorry, I didn't know your journey because I would have had lead down there and we would have all been shooting it. We would have had a documentary now.

This would have gone to Sundance. Thank you, John. This would have gone to fucking Sundance. I appreciate that. 360 pounds, you know, to 230 and take, listen. Like I said, just showing up. Like last Sunday, I went to my buddies all blue belts and they had a blue belt tournament at my own school.

I went over there and they were like, one guy was pissed because he lost in the second round. Like, you don't see me with a gear, huh? Are you here? That's amazing. These little fucking steps become big steps. You know, hopefully in two years you'll be in the Grand Prix.

Yeah, I mean, I'm hoping I'm really trying my best and I'm really gonna see how far I can go with this, you know? And the next step is winning a show. The next step is going to nationals and then maybe becoming pro, you never know. But I'm giving it my all. I mean, I gave it everything that I had, everything. And I spent a long time, a long part of my life

not really trying to do anything, not really shooting for the stars, you know? Or not really attempting to do much. You know, I'd go to school, this and that, you know? Great, that's fine. But I never really had a passion. I never really had something to work towards and give my all to.

And like I said, it's been a lot of years just fucking around and now I feel like I'm really alive. I wake up every morning with purpose and a goal, you know? And it's just, it's amazing. And just the amount of people and their support. And like I said, I never thought I had so many supporters and it's just, you know, when I was kind of, I was never going to quit,

but when I had my moments of weakness and wanting to quit and wanting to give up, I just always thought of the people that I was inspiring or the people that really had my back and were supporting me and I didn't want to let anyone down. So where I kind of started to kind of peter out, that's where everyone's support kind of lifted me up. And yeah, I couldn't have done it without everyone.

Did you have sponsors for this show or anything? No. This was an amateur show, totally, all the way. Yeah, yeah. Definitely just an amateur show. Had a lot of help from my father. Had a lot of help from my girlfriend. A lot of help from friends, you know?

But yeah, just an amateur show. And like I said, work full time, go to school. So everything I had, I just, I dumped it all into that. Every ounce of energy that I had, I put it into that. So I got a little, I got a little obsessive, you know? A little obsessive, maybe a little too focused, you know? Neglected some things, some relationships and whatnot, but I did what I had to do and that's what it takes.

That's what it takes to be the best and that's what it takes to pursue your dream is you just gotta give it all you got. When you make an omelet, you're gonna break a few fucking eggs and it's really weird that you said that, that when you go for your goal and you look at what's important and you go, you know what, I'm gonna do this.

Usually you gotta sacrifice. Usually there's sacrifice involved. Somebody suffers, you know? I look at myself and I'm like, yeah, I'm 325 fucking pounds or whatever. I'm even moving to this town, I was 240. You know, was I eating fucking healthy? No, I wasn't eating that Burger King,

but I was in the, I always liked good food. I spent the extra 10 bucks for a nice piece of fish, whatever, but I got so obsessed with comedy, you know? I got so obsessed with comedy. You know, my goal was a year. I came out that way to be here a year, Curtis. I didn't know, this ain't for me. I went to prison, I was gonna put me on TV.

Fuck it, these people are nice people. They all had fucking nice childhoods. They all had lawns, you know? I come from fucking hell and these people are like, and after a year, you book a commercial and you stay out here and I got so involved with comedy, I didn't even see the weight getting put on and I didn't care, I didn't care.

I just wanted to fucking do comedy. You know what, I walked to the comedy store, but if I walked in those days, that gave me the excuse to eat six fucking Subway sandwiches, not that I ate Subway sandwiches. Yes, you did. I'm just saying that. You just admitted it.

My wife told me the other day, she goes, there was a guy that used to come around with snow cones. She goes, you used to eat three fucking snow cones in the afternoon. You know how much sugar is in those fucking snow cones, those fresh ones from the thing, you know? I didn't even think about that. I kept eating like I was 21.

I had a friend when we were kids, I would eat a box of cereal and an entomance cake every fucking morning for breakfast. I wonder what that motherfucker looks like today. You know, like, and I heard the stories until one day I went over to his house, I'm like, let me eat breakfast over here. This guy, his mom would buy like 10 boxes of cereal

for him for the fucking week. He would eat them at one shot. There's nothing better than that. Jesus Christ, Lee. Okay, tell me, if you had a big bowl and a box of cinnamon toast crunch, isn't that big of a box? Do it like two or three and then you keep adding milk?

I'm a Golden Grahams type of motherfucker, you know what I'm saying? Or I didn't like Count Chalkula and I didn't like the, I liked the, there was one that the milk turned chocolate but it was perfect. You could taste the diabetes. You could just taste the diabetes. You could taste the coca-cola, coca-cola, coca-cola. Count Blackula, I didn't like fucking the Count Chalkula,

Blackula. That's an entirely different cereal. No, that's, Blackula's a fucking movie, a black exploitation movie, kind of suck it. What's the future? What do you want to do? Like, what's the next contest? Well, I want to compete in a contest

before the end of the year, get it done before the holidays. Because I told my girlfriend I would not compete during the holidays, you know, to enjoy that family time. And, you know, she's very traditional Mexican and they like to eat and I love to eat too. And, you know, I promised her I wouldn't compete during that time. So before that time, get a show, get a show done,

graduate, get my masters and then market myself as a personal trainer. Pursue my doctorate. I'm in the process of getting NASM certified to become a personal trainer. So, it's only a matter of a few months to actually get my certification, but... What don't you do?

You should be like half Jamaican, what don't you do? There's 18 fucking things going on, brother. And this is it, this is what, you know, everybody wants a day off in this country. There's no days off. No, never. What day off are you talking about? That's fucking people, you know, don't want to give a fuck.

They want to walk around with sandals on and eat hummus. Who the fuck is, which one of my freaks? I don't know you cucksucker, don't be calling me no more. Let me just do these things. Hey, listen, man, I brought you on here because you inspired the fuck out of me. I had to hit you up and tell you my situation and you hit me up with John and it's been great.

I love this little routine I have with John. It's helped me a lot, you know, I feel fucking stronger. Last Thursday in Jiu-Jitsu was possibly my best day in two years. Oh, very nice. The deadlifts, like I was telling you before, the thing, the deadlifts send my body into a different realm. Those first couple of weeks, it would just,

the first two weeks I had to pull a leg, I had to go home and have the protein shake and go to sleep. And just shut off. And just go to sleep. I just destroyed my sides, my shoulders, my legs. I wouldn't be sore the next day, just for that minute. You know, I always stretch out and do it afterwards.

What's the deal with the protein powder, right? Like whenever I drink two protein shakes in a day, like let's say I'm in a rush and I make a protein shake, I don't lose weight that week. I gotta only do one after my workout. Is that when you do it after your workout? Yeah, I usually just limit it to just after my workout where your body really needs it.

I mean, technically you could have one in the morning, but you don't really need a protein shake at any other time of the day. But just when you break down that muscle and you need to repair. And they said to put the kitchen sink in there, banana for carbs, a little fucking sugar in there to get the sugars back to something.

Somebody said, not like fucking a boxly, like a teaspoon. I think you were making like a milkshake recipe. I am, this is it. This is not. No, but you can't put sugar in it, can you? No, after the workout. Oh. After the workout.

Because your body, yeah, just a little bit. You know, Cuban people put salt in that fucking coffee. Tastes like dick, but it does something. It does some glycemic fucking thing. I don't know, what are you bothering me for? Yeah, after your workout, you're definitely gonna want at least 40 grams of protein and then 40 to 50 grams of like fast digesting carbs.

Always, like I said, sometimes I'll have like candy corn or some Captain Crunch or maybe some ice cream. What about banana and water? Fuck a banana. Shut the fuck up, Cox. If you could have Captain Crunch. No, that's the problem. That's the mind of a chubby.

You gotta fucking do the banana. People who eat bananas look like fucking Hercules here. Yeah, but he eats Captain Crunch. Because he's fucking picking up buildings part-time. When you pick up buildings part-time, you can eat fucking bananas and Captain Crunch and get your dicks up. It's when your chubby's like fucking me

that you can't be doing everything. You drink water, you gain a pound. So, what else do you put in the protein for flavor? There's this peanut butter powder. It's called... Why would you do that to yourself? I might as well spray fucking bottle like this gym over here.

Well, no, it's called PB2 or it's called Just Great Stuff. It's a peanut butter powder. It only has maybe about 1.5 grams of fat per 12 grams of a serving. And then it has maybe about five grams of carbs, four grams of protein. So, it's definitely a lot lower in fat than regular peanut butter and just adds

that peanut butter taste. So, you don't have to put a real scoop of peanut butter in there, but it tastes just as good. And so, you have like a chocolate protein, some peanut butter powder, and then I always put some egg whites in there. And it tastes just like a chocolate peanut butter shake. I just, I'll put just raw egg whites in there.

So, I just drink them. Is that what you just like, Joey? Oh, yeah, yeah, that's what I want in my fucking milkshake. Two fucking heart attack potentials. I used to make a good, when I was really skinny and I was a young kid and I'd lift heavy, I used to make a Mac Daddy shake. I'd put some milk in that motherfucker,

a half a thing of ice cream, some just protein. In those days, it was only Ben Wieder protein and generic protein from fucking Pathmark. I would throw some protein in there, some wheat germs, six or seven eggs, because I used to follow Bob Berry and brothers, they used to eat 30 fucking grams of protein per meal. You had to eat five meals, that's 150 grams of protein

a day for you to get fucking yoked to death. They said they would eat 36 fucking hard-boiled eggs a day. I don't ever want to be around those motherfuckers with their asshole smell like, they just have a brown spot in their fucking, did I tell you I had to throw a pair on the way away? Where, on the road? No, I went to the fucking gym with my rotten ass

and I went to take a shower and there's a skid mark, I didn't want my wife to see it, so I had to bury it under a fucking, under a diaper like a fucking... Did you throw it away at your house? Or did you throw it away at the gym? No, I went to the neighbor's house, and I said, if I could do it over there,

I'd throw it away at my fucking house, you fuck. I thought you were showing off at the gym. No, no, no, I went to, your dad must have taken the shit and not wiped it completely and you had that little hemorrhoid that sits under the tuck of your fat and it skid-marted my, no, and I knew something was up because my ass was burning.

I didn't know what the fuck was going on. Pick up a diaper and put it underneath. Sure, who's gonna blame the diaper anyway? I'm just trying to tell you something for the week, Huxley, you gotta bother me. What else do you, like, I like strawberries in the shake. I like bananas in the shake. When I have too many, now that they cut me down to 150,

I don't put bananas in the shake no more. I just put the protein, a little bit of fucking sugar, and that's it, and I make it into a small one so the sugar hits it. I like the, I use two different types of protein on it, which is 16 scoops of protein per gram, and then when I switch up, I switch up to the shit from GNC.

It's got the ripped, it's 40 and two and it's got 2,000 fucking milligrams of salamino acid that helped me burn fat, that shit ain't working. It ain't working! That sucks. Yeah, so John has you on 150 grams of carbs a day. Carbs for now, it was 185 or something, and then he put it down to 150.

I got 50 of fat and 185 of protein. Damn. And I can't hit the protein. I'm always fucked up with the carbs, but not too much, and I'm right there with the fucking, with the meat, unless if I have meat, it throws it all off, like an eight ounce patty of meat. I was buying the box ones, I shit blood for two days,

no more box ones. I get the ones from around fresh and easy, got good ones too, but they go not a business. They are? That's a goddamn thing. Me and Leo, a lot of times I go to the gym and shoot across the street to know how and get just a burger with some tomato slices in the water,

that's it. But not even with a bun, you didn't get a bun. I don't get the fucking bun. I don't like, I've never been a bad burger. Listen, you get a good fucking burger, you dope that motherfucker up with some salt and pepper, maybe some garlic salt, you burn it nice in the grill, you don't need no fucking bun, that's for amateurs.

It's really good, delicious. Especially on the grill, the flavor stays inside. Tremendous, I'm telling you. Nice, really nice at the little hamburger, with some tomato slices, a cottage cheese, I don't like cottage cheese, I'm just throwing it out there. You tried to pass it off to me? Yeah, they always give me cottage cheese,

like the name is Mervin. That's some shit, only Mervin, it's fucking cottage cheese. Oh, poor Mervin. Whatever, it's always a Mervin that eats cottage cheese and fucking Coast Law with his burger. Man, I'm fucking super proud of you. And you're one of those guys I really wanted to put on, I really wanted to put on somebody from Facebook or Twitter

that we've been around each other and you're a fucking inspiration, you're inspiring me. And thank you for turning me on to John. Yeah. Like I said, it's working, man. I do two Cardios a week on the Stairmaster, how he does in 20 seconds and 40. And I got a great system, I go all the way up to 12

and I go backwards to six and all the way back up. I fucking like it, man. And I burn a lot of calories and then one day I love those kettlebells, so I just do swings and clean and jerks and it's still like fucking 9,000 calories. You know, I go in the park, I sweat. I can't, I hate working out inside a couple of days. Like even just to some days I'm going and I go,

right, I live in California, I don't even fucking sign. I go to the Hollywood park, I take 235 pound kettlebells, I go for a farmer's walk, I'll swing one of them and I'll clean and press them, I'll do some fucking sit-ups with an eight pound ball. Boom, I'm out of there, I got some sun, I got a couple, I got bit by some red ants in the head. I was, it's like a motherfucker a couple weeks ago.

But anyway, brother, you're a real inspiration. Where can people ask you questions? What the fuck is wrong with this guy? Well, you don't want to ask him quite, you don't, we all fucking dilemmas you have. It's the great way to say it. Where can people ask you questions? People are gonna fucking want to ask them questions, Lee.

He's got a lot of answers to people. Remember Jeremy, he had all the answers. Yeah, he's got all the fucking answers, like Jeremy from ballcancer.com. No, from the floor, I fucking... Whatever. From the floor, I fucking... Whatever, him too, everybody got all the answers.

Let's say it's like, I hit you up, I just hit you up. You impressed me so much, I had to hit you up. I just want to know what the fuck you were doing, man. Yeah, and I'm glad you did and thank you for all your support and thank you for all your compliments. I mean, it really means a lot. And I miss the days of going to watch you perform at the brand improv, you know, me and Omar, and Omar.

Omar, yeah, yeah. We used to have some good fucking shows there on Wednesday. Yeah. We used to get some killers, we get stone, but then a bread. That was a lot, that was a lot of money. Mikey used to bring a green chili burrito. They got to be fucking 2,000 cops. Delicious, that's green chili fucking burrito.

How did you guys become friends? Cause there's a lot of people who come to shows, but there are like four or five different people who started out coming to shows as like fans and then just became friends. That's it, man. He did something that I saw that just, I stuck with it. I wanted to see what he was doing.

You know, there's some people who exercise and they make you feel bad. They go out to make fat people feel bad about it. Like, look at me, who gives a fuck? But there's some people who just make comments and they're subtle and you did that. You weren't saying, look at me, I'm Johnny Alice. You were just saying, this is where I started.

This is where I were. And after a while, I started just paying attention. You start paying attention to somebody who's making fucking, listen. The beauty of this, whether you're a bodybuilder, whether you want to play the piano, whether you want to be a fucking podcast producer, even if you just want to suck dick,

whatever the fuck you want to do is you gotta dive into it. Yeah, and you dove into it. Absolutely. That's it. That's it. That's the moral of this fucking story. Everybody's walking around out there. I don't know what my next move is.

Find your passion and you're sitting there going, Joey, you know, I've been doing everything. I haven't found my passion. Keep playing the ukulele. I don't give a fuck. There's something out there, man, that's gonna take you away from your everyday fucking life. That one hour of peace.

It's your world when you're going in with speakers on and you're lifting that heavy weight. And all of a sudden, you're not looking forward to being there. And all of a sudden, now you're up to back and you got one exercise left and your shirt's wet. And you took your mind off the fucking shit that's going on in your life

or what's not going on in your life. That's what it's all about, man. That's what your passion's about. Yeah, I mean, I love it every day. I love it. A lot of people, they drag going to the gym or working out but I absolutely love it. And, you know, if I could get paid just to go to the gym

and work out, I would love that. You know, that's what I would do. That would be my job. Now you live in the Orange County area? Yeah. Listen, man, if you live in Orange County and you wanna just ask questions, I mean, this is the time to sign up with a fucking personal trainer.

He's not official yet, but I'm sure he's $10 cheaper than fucking Tony down in the corner. He ain't gonna give you no shit and he's really doing it. So this is the guy I wanted my fucking corn if I lived in fucking in Orange County. I go meet at a park somewhere and do pushups. Yeah, I mean, I've pretty much done it all. I mean, I've experienced every diet, every exercise plan.

You know, I'm not out to make money off of anyone. I'm just here to help people. I mean, I needed a lot of help when I was first starting my journey. I had no idea what I was doing and I learned a lot just by trial and error and making mistakes and just doing a lot of reading and but mainly just making mistakes.

And if I can help someone, kind of give them some advice so they don't have to make as many mistakes as I did, I'm more than happy to give back and really help people out. I mean, I'm not any better than any one of you who has a weight problem. You know, I mean, if I could do it, you most certainly can too

because I never had a leg up in terms of my genetics. I was, I've been fat my whole life, you know, never had a six pack ever. And so if you wanna get in shape, if you want just some general knowledge about nutrition, working out, I mean, whatever it may be, you can contact me on my Facebook, Curtis Salcedo, or you can contact me on my Instagram,

it's lmonstro83, or you can email me, Curtis underscore salcedo at yahoo.com. Last name, S-A-L-C-I-D-O. So you can contact me those three ways. I'll be more than happy to answer any type of question. If you guys just wanna know, if you wanna get into bodybuilding or, you know, you have questions on what to do

in terms of just overall health and fitness, I mean, I'm here to help, you know, I'm here to help. So, you know, don't hesitate to contact me and always, you know, people contact me all the time, actually, on Instagram, Facebook, stuff like that, or even at the gym. And, you know, I always try to make time for people, you know, and I never wanna shut anyone out,

you know, I will help every single last person if you guys need the help. Thank you, brother, for coming on, and I wish you fucking nothing but love and luck. You're a fucking unadulterated genius for what you did. And I'm very proud of you. I'm sure a lot of people, you know, wanna say I wanna look like that

and don't know where the fuck to start. So, here's where to start, cock suckers. Get off the couch, do a jumping jack, stop sitting there. Your life's passing through you, you fuck. Let me get some shout-outs to some people and we're gonna move on with our lives. I'll let you start your little fucking Easter week and you can go on eggs or whatever the fuck you wanna do.

Here you go to my main people. Hunt eggs? What other fuck people do? They hide eggs and they jump up and down behind the bush and the kid comes back with an egg with candy, and it's fun. You never did that. I'm sure you'll do a fucking candy, cock sucker.

Anyway, if you wanna be like my man Tarzan over here, optimum fucking optimization, you understand me? You wanna be the fucking King of Swing or you wanna fucking sit there in the corner, wait for the fucking ugly chick to come get you? That's not gonna happen. Go to honor.com right now. Check out their list of supplements

and fucking weighted equipment, stuff to help you look mean, lean and to be the 100% you. It's called optimum optimization. That's how we do it here. Go to honor.com. You're like, Joey, where do I start? We got the Alphabet. Get the new mood, look at the shroom tech

for a little energy. It's got those fucking mushrooms in them. Not that you're gonna trip and see Indians. This is the good shit. This gives you some fucking lung power. Gives you an extra 15 minutes if you wanna fuck somebody in the muffler so you don't tap out.

Anyway, all jokes aside, listen, go to honor.com right now. There's a box. Order it. Stop fucking around. I'm gonna give you 10% off today. Tomorrow too, but today's more important, all right? Go to honor.com, whatever you want.

Go to the box and press in. Church, C-H-U-R-C-H. You know what? You get 10% off. They also have to stay on the program. If you like what you fucking got, put your credit card, their military on the first. You'll be doing fucking whatever they wanna do.

Belly crawls, whatever the fuck you wanna do, all right? Talking about belly crawls. Listen, you're sitting there at home. You're not doing that. You got a finger up your ass. You got no cable because you're fucking broke. But you know what? You got Roku.

Go to Iron Dragon TV right now. Tonight's your night. You can start watching classic martial art films. You understand me? From early Jackie Chan to Jet Lee, the fucking Iron Fist, the legend, the return of the fucking one-armed sw- They got it!

That's my fucking point. You've been sitting there for years saying, you know what? I saw every horror movie. What's next in my life? Classic, fuck, shut the fuck, classic martial art films coming at you right now. Iron Dragon TV, the lead in 4K technology.

Dave Foley, don't fuck around. You want, you're like Joey, how do I know? How do you know? I'm gonna take care of you right now. Go to Iron Dragon TV right now and press in. Joey. Oh shit, J-O-E-Y and get two free movies. Not one, I'm gonna give you a deuce.

So you get some popcorn, maybe a chocolate sundae, get a joint, go out to the garage, smoking with the cat, whatever the fuck you're into. Number two, you're sitting there with those rotten fucking underwear you got on, like the ones I threw out. They were the last of the white ones. You're sitting there going, what's my next move? I can't even bring a broad over,

because these underwear look like fucking death and they smell even fucking worse. Tonight when you take your underwear off, smell the crease by your nutsack. Just smell it. Not even when they're dirty. Smell it when it's clean and see what you fucking smell. You're not gonna have that.

You know why? Because you're gonna start with a whole new underwear. Me undies, they don't fuck around. Listen man, the best underwear out there. I go to Jiu-Jitsu, I got me undie on. I go to the gym, I got me undie on. Why? Because the elastic band holds on to my fat

little fucking waist, you understand me? Like Elvis. And every time I bend over, you don't have to see butt crack. Number two, I love them to work out because it pulls the moisture away from my nutsack. My balls are fucking magnifi-geek. You understand me?

If I go to a gay bar, I could take them out and somebody will suck them with pride. Because I got me undies underwear on. That's how I fucking roll. Don't take it from me. Go to me undies. Stop talking right now. Look at the page of what they got.

They got men and women underwear right now. Go to me undies right now and press in. Joey. Boom! And what do they get? 20% off and free shipping in Canada and the United States. Am I bullshiting you? You're not bullshiting me.

I'm not bullshiting you. You're looking at me going, Joey, what do I need those underwear for? You want a sling dick? You gotta look like 100% from the inside out. Cucksuck, it all starts in the inside, all right? I'm 400 pounds. I walk into a bar.

I know I can pick up that blonde. I know I can go in and take my dick out. In my mind, I'm not gonna pick it up, but in my mind. But it all starts inside. Me undies gives you more confidence. You know, when you take a home, you take your hammer out, it's gonna come out of a fresh pair of underwear. They're gonna be a unique color, like a sad,

like a camouflage. And your dicks gonna smell good. It's gonna be fucking, it's not gonna smell like that with chlorine from those white fucking underwear. Go to me undies.com right now and press in. Joey and get 20% off your order of free shipping in Canada and the United States.

You're sitting there going, Joey, you know what? You come to me with the same bullshit every week. What the fuck, 20% off? What am I gonna do with that? Well, here it is, bitch. Here it is, bitch. You want something for free? I'm gonna give you the best free

because nothing is fucking free. I mean, let's face it, you're gonna pay for shipping. But I'm gonna give you a free sample box with naturebox.com. Nothing is free. You're gonna pay for something on the arm. Two dollars, but who gives a fuck? It's a $30, $40 value.

I'm gonna send you two big bags and three little bags. Sriracha almonds, sriracha walnuts, cocoa almonds. The cattle kernels. The cattle kernels. I mean, it never ends. Just go on the fucking go on to naturebox.com right now. Stop. You're sitting there.

It's two in the morning when you live. What else are you gonna do? You're gonna look at you pointing jerk off. You might as well have five free fucking snacks sent to your house. And if you like them, you get them sent to your house every month on the first like fucking clockwork. Whether you like that, they'll let you pick

whatever the fuck you want. Why listen to me? I'm just a fat fuck. No, I don't go to any of that. This is what I would eat every fucking night. There's nature box. Those little Szechuan pretzels will get your asshole on fire.

You understand me? Anyway, don't take it from me. I'm giving it to you for free. Go to naturebox.com and press in. Joey. Oh shit, boom. That's all you need to do. J-O-E-Y.

I'm gonna send you five free sample bags directly to your fucking house. Is it free? The box is free, but you're gonna pay for fucking shipping. UPS don't fucking drive around for free. Those big trucks, they cost money, cock sucker. On it, Iron Dragon TV, me on these,

and naturebox.com. Curtis Salcedo, you're a fucking savage. I'm proud of you. You're a success, you understand me? Everybody's worried about Selena. Look at you. You're making a comeback. What's up with you, fucko?

I'm super high. You're always super high. That's your problem. You make it happen. Everything all right. You're looking good, Tony. I'm trying. Just close this motherfucker off.

Don't forget, I'm gonna be in Ventura at the Hong Kong Garden up there, on Asianville up there, on Friday fucking night. I have no idea what time the show starts. Just get there by 8-8-30. I'm driving up from fucking Hollywood here. So get there like 8-8-30.

I think there's a couple people on this show, so I'm like, okay. Look at the website. They'll tell them what time it starts. I don't know what time. I just go to Hong Kong Garden. But they can find you. It's an Asian fucking restaurant in Ventura.

It's like you're going to Chinatown, and there's people flying through the air like into the dragon. Maybe three, four fucking Chinese people in Ventura. Hong Kong Garden. Did they all work at Hong Kong Garden? I have no fucking idea. I've never been there before.

Next week, I'm in San Diego at the American Comedy Club. Friday and Saturday night, four shows. They're gonna sell out. Don't come prying on me. Joy didn't get fucking tickets. I'm telling you right now, cocksucker. Curtis, I love you.

Thank you, buddy, for coming up on them, keeping them company. It's a long way to the top of you on a rock and roll. You. What's up, buddy? What's going on with you? I put up a podcast yesterday, before I go listen to Find You Radio.

It's Matt Fultron. All right. And I'm trying to figure out what I want for dinner right now. What do you want? What's your fantasy fucking star? Oh, you want? We'll get some nachos somewhere.

Nah. That's another star. No. Let's do another piece. Look what we did to this. Look at my eyes. 6,000 milligram star. We already got to the middle.

That's how we don't, we don't fuck around here. Anarchy edibles, always taking care of the sixth. Not a fucking, a Twitter joke. I ain't for a fool. No, there's 6,000 fucking milligrams. Me and Lee, this fucking star, was bigger than the one over Jesus' head when they stabbed him.

Look what it's down to. It's like a rectangle. Smell this, Curtis. Just smell this. What does it smell like? Yep. That's the real fucking deal. That's the real deal.

There's got to be 3,000 milligrams left to THC right here. We're going to eat this every fucking session. We'll see you guys next week, Monday night, 7 o'clock. I love you motherfuckers. Stay black. Don't forget Friday night, the Hong Kong garden up there in Ventura. Come on out Santa Barbara, break his,

break his field, whatever. Come on down. Let's eat some fucking egg rolls. I can't eat them. I got to eat shrimp and lobster sauce because I can't eat meat on good Friday. Make sure you bring your Chinese fries. Let's go, Lee.

Speed it up, cocksucker. We got people to see. You're not going to say goodnight. You're not going to give big ads. I am, I am doing right now. All right, let's go while we're young. Okay. Now that the show's over,

don't forget to go to naturebox.com and sign up to get your free sampler box of great tasting, healthy snacks. Forget the vending machine and start snacking smarter with delicious treats like barbecue kettle kernels. Go to naturebox.com slash joey. That's an age bug.

Wait, hold on. This girl fucking Nella J. She got big tits, but she puts a picture of a steak on Twitter. I don't know if she knows steak. Bring up those titties, bitch. Wait, what happened? It don't matter.

Just read the fuck. Show her titties, the steak. Okay. I don't know. I'll keep going with the other thing. Also, go to meundys.com slash joey and get 20% off of your first order of their men's and women's underwear

and you're also only going to get free shipping in the United States and Canada. Go to onna.com and East Cold World Church to get 10% off all their optimization products and go to irondragontv.com and East Cold World Joey to get two free rentals. Thank you. Well, I've come on a working, like a working man.

And I've got my act together on the wall. Give me back my bread. Put them back where they belong. They ain't fooling around because I've done had my fun. Ain't gonna see no more damage done. Give me back my bread. Sweet talk and the people gonna run me out of time. And I'm dragging up a whiskey for the battle to ship around.

But I'm leaving this game on the slipper head of you. And you won't know how to hear me cry because I do not see the blues. Give me back my bread. Put them back where they belong. They ain't fooling around because I've done had my fun. Ain't gonna see no more damage done. Give me back my bread.

Put them back where they belong. Then I've been gone since I turned to you. Life's been on top and then you'll see if I want to dream. But I've got it back on feeling better every day. Get all those pills that once you'd better get out of my way. Give me back my bread. Put them back where they belong. Ain't fooling around because I've done had my fun.

Ain't gonna see no more damage done. Give me back my bread. Put them back where they belong. Give me back my bread.