Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #363 - Emilio Rivera

Episode Date: March 17, 2016

Emilio Rivera, Actor, seen on Sons Of Anarchy and Weeds, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt live in studio. This podcast is brought to you by: Tracker - Go to Thetracker.com and use code word "church" for 40% off of your first Tracker Product.    Onnit.com - Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout.   Headspace: Go to headspace.com/joey and download the Free Headspace App and start your Take10 10 day free trial .   Recorded live on 03/16/2016.
    

Thank you for doing this my brother. I'm glad to see you. That'd be here brother. Oh, you know that This show the church of what's happening now is brought to you by headspace Go to headspace.com right now To download the free headspace app and begin their take 10 program for 10 days of guided meditation That's right. Totally free. You don't need money. You don't need a cashier's check No form of ID the headspace.com slash joey headspace.com slash joey And download the free headspace app. This show is also brought to you by tracker Never lose anything again with tracker

listeners of this show the church what's happening now get a special discount of 40 off of your first tracker device Go to the tracker.com and enter promo code church. It's the tracker.com promo code church The show is also brought to you by on it.com Go to on it.com and use codeword church to get 10 off all of their amazing optimization products like alpha brain and new mood Oh shit Turn off world news tonight with fucking david mure. He ain't doing dick for you Uncle joey see i'll give it to you straight cocks up Just oh shit. Here we go little pita gabriel right off genesis boom boom boom

Lisa yad and milio boom boom reverend the motherfucker What I Look at me zoning out. I mean look at the fucking stars thinking about 20 dollar bills at the ATM machine for a lot of people don't know pita gabriel is on tour with Sting they're charging. I don't know what they're charging But fucking pita gabriel looks like he's 200 years old. He's completely he looks like mr. freeze And sting i can't go see sting. He's a fucking ego, you know, you hate sting

I don't hate sting. He just with the ukulele and shit, you know His friends applaud that shit like he takes a ukulele and sings a song If you have a good friend, they'll tell you listen. Put the fucking ukulele away. You're embarrassing me. You're in sting You know what? Emilia, what's the story brother? Oh good brother. I must have to be here joey. Thanks for inviting me again, brother I love you. I miss you. I don't see other additions no more. The additions are slim and fucking Few is getting different out there a little bit right now, right? It really really is a lot of people complaining a lot of people expect it like uh

You know man, you have to be optimistic But I think a lot of people this pilot season expected this to be the year of their life And I know people who bits that they went on three or four pilots. It's not I remember living here and having people go out on 30 fucking fuck 40 pilots. I never went out on 30 fucking 40 pilots I'm on three a year. Yeah, you know, I think that's a little bit over They kind of exaggerated a little bit about that bro because as long as I've been doing this game. I've never been more than Maybe nine 10 pilots and that's a lot brother. You're talking about you know, so, you know 2030

Man, you're looking motherfucking You didn't book one goddamn. You know, you know, it's not good. You know what man? Those young kids at the store, man They go out every fucking day. They go out for shit. I didn't even heard of They go out for shit. That's in development in development. Yeah, those 23 24 year old They're going for them. Yeah, they go out for them man. Those kids those young kids go out a lot of fucking There's a girl where I go. I go over here To the medical marijuana store. There's a girl in there. That's 22 She goes out four or five times a week

Because she was even complaining to me that she goes out for 16 That she goes out for 16. Well, that's good when you can do that. Yeah, so she goes out like every day That's times I won't see her. She's like joey. I went out every day last week. It was fucking mind-boggling. I booked this She always books MTV. She books CW that's all good. Yeah But she goes out five times a fucking week four times a fucking week the eyes on her size Yeah, that's good man. I fucking I used to go. You know what I used to when I first moved I used to go for a lot of commercial audition Commercials are good, but you know, I know one time from for about a little period

I was doing a lot of movies and tv shows and I quit doing commercials for about seven years and then uh My other agent I got and said, you know, I just wanted to start doing it again And I did and then I booked like three commercials in two months And I'm thinking why did I stop doing commercials because when those resistors come in they're pretty nice, bro You know I'm talking about well, they make you go over that like for guys like me They make me go over the top on sag insurance What do you go from number one the number from number two to number one? Well, that's good though Yeah, commercials always push me over the edge. Commercials are great, man. You know, I just came for one right now

You know I'm saying so it's good, you know to be the though I can't say what I'm gonna support but still but you know, it was uh, yeah I saw they're nice in between the gigs, you know jobs, you know, it's like uh, you go Michael peel box You don't know what's going to be in the middle of the day. You know, it's like the little one little one little ladle You know, it could be a two dollar residual check. It could be a 20,000 dollar residual check. You never know it's nice, you know, you know And when you're a character actor Since you don't shoot a lot a lot a lot of commercials when you shoot a commercial

It's sort of like an advertisement for you It makes people go holy shit commercials I'm gonna call that motherfucker and next week and I respect like shit like Like it's just like I remember seeing you on a commercial one time And they played this motherfucker every Tuesday night during sunset. It was good, right? Yeah. Yeah Yeah, you were like the cook in the back. Yeah, I was on another draft And you know who you knew the narrator was rom perlman, bro

That's great. That was that was the narrator. So it was pretty cool. It brought us together again right there, you know And it was on during sons of anarchy. So yeah, it was always on during sons of anarchy But you know, um, you know, and now everybody's doing a commercial I mean, but he should have total guts went out there and I was really funny for hannigan, you know Yes, you know, you know, Gary. You know, man, it's pretty cool, man, you know, I saw the one with what she's got a ton of them What's her name? Ben Affleck's wife Jennifer Garner. Yeah, she got a bunch of them. She's doing the credit card ones I saw what's his name from the 70s show. She's doing jim fucking beam

Or really is it right? Yeah. What's his name? Mila Kunis. Mila Kunis is doing fucking jim. Oh, really? Is that right? It's a good commercial too. Yeah. Well, you got a Matthew McConaughey doing the the Lincoln commercial all of them He does a lot of them It's pretty cool, man You see like a one day of work and you get paid for like two years, you know, so it's pretty nice, you know How hard is it to break in though as far as what commercials because well, there's people that are just Commercial actors, bro, you know saying and then they're really they're just set for that and you never see them on tv or a film But man, they got on that that unlock

But and but that must be great and then they probably get hired all the time Like so other commercial actors like hate them because they're always getting hired You know, maybe so, you know, just like some of the actors hate other actors who go off the same road never get the road But that one guy you dig so it goes around to a different place You know, I mean, I see some guys because I know some of the commercial guys and And they and they just good they're in man, you know, and they they they do home depot They do Burger King they do all that and there's the same guy all the time So it's a trip two three years ago. The number one guy was a black guy

That's very you see him in everything but you don't he's a nice guy too. You see him in everything But you don't was it the old spice guy or no? He does a home depot. He does Westinghouse he does all the everything and how it works. See in the old days, listen when I moved to this town I didn't know dick about dick. You understand me. There's people who take drama in high school or They go to college and they go, huh? Let me take a performing arts or dance class. I didn't take dick Okay, all I know is I got on stage one day that I have aspirations to film a television Everybody does but one of the long shot and I moved out of here, you know doing comedy

Eight years working hard maybe nine years And the first thing I got was a commercial agent Sutton Barton minority They're one of the hottest agents in those day. I got them right out of the improv Boom within a week. I was going out nice church's chicken. I mean we were going out We were fucking going out in those days. I used to have a pager and I'd walk out of one audition and Hello, you got a 330 in Santa Monica. It was fucking crazy this in the middle of all this I was starting to lose faith And I and all of a sudden they call me and they go, listen, they're looking for a Cuban dude for a Taco Bell commercial

All the way down on Bundy Whatever that was on one week I walk in that boom. I read I got a call back. It's fourth of july weekend I nailed the commercial I get back to town They they did away with the commercial but they told me to go down there anyway for the three days and get paid Abbot and Kenny. This is the old school. Yeah, Abbot and Kenny. That's something about you. Yeah I hate the parking over there. Oh my god. I'm talking about. Yeah, but it got me sag. It did so many things I'm here 80 thousand fucking dollars. That's right with one Taco Bell commercial for fucking months

I didn't see it coming. Who saw it coming. I don't think those days now my neighbor That dude was a bad motherfucker. This was before the new deal See the deal now is when you go see my dick got hard the first time I walked into an audition and I saw National and international Doug my head on this is after I booked the 84 000 for national I said if I booked an 84 000 commercial for national What are they gonna give me for an international? And I found that it was a $3,200 buyer. Yeah, I hate those buyouts for life. I mean you have some good buyouts

So, you know, too, I mean I had a commercial that ran for seven years and that was a good gig And I remember when there was a something about smoking, you know So we were all in the room about 30 of us and they go who here smokes and uh at the time I did smoke So everybody like was kind of tentative to pick up the hand I go. I smoke man, you know, and we want to see you You know talking about the smoking was an anti smoking thing and uh And what happened was that's when everybody was real strong about um quitting smoking So every time another state would buy it I was getting paid brother that ran for seven years But it was a good gig man, you know

And seven fuck seven years. Yeah, there's a lot of jobs like that I was talking to somebody who's trying to break into looping Just like good work and she said it was impossible and they get like extras are getting a thousand a day for what is essentially like Audio extra work. Yeah, but what is that right there? There's this kind of a thing called the loop group and now they got that pretty much on live, bro You know I'm talking about is really yeah, they got this it's like anything else like that You know, but uh, there's a loop loop and they're really good and they haven't they're mixed, you know all mixed up And they they do a lot of the work, bro

If you look at some of the credits in the movies in the the tv shows at the end will say Looping the loop group, you know I didn't I didn't know anything about I did my own looping because you know I've done different tv shows where I have to go back and do some of the Um, you know some of the words that were not clear my adl And you do your own looping but the way it was described to me was she said if it's ever like you're in a restaurant The principles will be miked up and the waiter would be miked up if they said anything but for all the chatter Around the restaurant. That's what exactly that's where it's for just add a little word here and there

It's amazing how much money's wasted in all in tv in hollywood. Yeah, brother. Yeah Because that's true. Nobody else is mic only you and then of course they have the boom But then the weather the words or the Doys in the background later on There's a certain group of people that have just sat sat tight and made a living in this town And I heard like voice over people are the same like to have that inner click of voice over people That's the people they use over and over and over again. You know, and that's just the way it is. You know, it's like the teams The teams just don't go fucking nowhere until they die. Nobody quits the teams. Nobody says, you know what? I want to try tennis

It's all over you're making a hundred thousand sitting on your fucking ass. You know, really cool over there Yeah benefits and you know, whatever the fuck so That's that there's so many different careers in this entertainment business Well, you're like a velvet hammer. You make fucking money, but nobody even knows you exist How nice would that be to fucking make money and nobody even know you fucking existed Like who you hear you hear you hear the narrow saying that people are digging you for the right reason, bro Either or not they're digging you or not digging you for the right reason You know what I mean? Not because what you have, you know what I mean? And that's nice, you know

Well, I mean you could do that comedy writing if you wanted to if you want to get those silent writers Yeah, yeah, you know, what do you mean? Like if you if uh, if like another comedian was gonna hire you to write for them like that would be the I think what happens a lot right join Nobody fucking hires me to write for them because you know what comes out of my mouth is nonsense, but I love sitting if you sat with me in a room and I watched you do stand up I could give you some good throwaway shit For your style of material, right for your style of person who you are

Yeah, you know a friend of mine told me something really interesting He went on audition and the pilot was so bad. He said his own lines. He wrote his own fucking lines And he said I do that sometimes and it works, you know, because you make it your own you dig what I'm saying He said he went in and read him and then he goes listen I I can't put that on tape. You gotta at least do one line. He goes. I'm not doing it. He goes. Well, you can read it I see but with comedy is different because when you do comedy auditions It has to be because the whole setup and the whole punch and everything has to work for the way it's written It's written like that. So if you don't know nothing about comedy

You have I mean even if you do you they want to hear it the way it is because the whole it's all timing It's all about the timing on comedy shows. Well, I decided now for the last 10 years when I read for a comedy I just always try to win If I open up my mouth out of turn, it's gonna be a bomb It's gonna be to fucking kill that rule And if I really get going I might do one for the producer session to really knock them out of the fucking water You know, I'm saying go there you go So that's what I always do when I go to those comedy ones

I learned not to try to mix them up because you know what nine out of the 10 They'll say you can you please read them the way they are on paper. That was great. They'll even giggle But they'll tell you put them like you were on paper And then you do them that way that that fucking thing still stayed on tape Yeah, that's what you're saying You know, there's a lot of little fucking angles for comedy, you know, there's a lot of annoying I used to go in there and try to people said we're going and be yourself. You know my man abc They want you to be yourself

But you better say those fucking lines in the paper or if not they're gonna hunt. I think I don't want you Or what they're gonna do is take that mother fucking line and put it in there and not give you a dime, which they've done to me 90,000 times Are they supposed to pay you when you write your lines? I don't know. No, I don't know You know, they could just say like, okay, joy, you know, make it your own You know, you make it your own and you're not gonna get the credit Bro, you're gonna get you're already getting paid. You dig what I'm saying. So you just you know Just making it better for yourself actually

But um, you know, I when it comes to comedy, I've done a couple of sitcoms Not as a series regular, but you know as a guest star and um, it has to be The way it's written bro. It really is, you know, it's a true. It has to be the way it's written. Yeah Excuse me if you bang went out during the reeds And the producers there that that that that that they'll type it in they'll give you a pink sheet the next day And there you are Shit, you know And you feel great

Because your line works that means the most to me That means the world to me when I say three lines, but they keep one You know, and you know what they've done another thousand times immediately where I've gone in there and said, you know What I got nothing to lose You have nothing to lose in this room with three fucking people Nothing Yeah, is it because they want it past like their lawyers and stuff or they're just really Is abc they're owned by fucking disney. I don't know who owns mbc

And I don't know So I don't they don't give a fuck of your mickey rickles and you got the funniest fucking joke in the world Once you get to that read they come in as the director lines you up and says action And you say it and you make everybody laugh There's gonna be a little white lady with fucked up glasses That's five foot eight with a little vest on is she gonna come up to you with a fucking binder? Am I lying to your mailie else scripts? She's gonna come up to you. Hi. Good morning. I'm in lane

Hi I'm scripty. Hi. Let me talk to you about something You didn't say yeah, Evan. You didn't say the You didn't say one. I don't know what's that other line you said in spanish. I've never heard anything like that in my life You know, I hear you're spanish and they're fucking jewish And they're telling you like I've never heard anything like that in my life. So please don't admit that whole line Yeah, yeah, that's that's that but they're they they could be your best friends and your worst enemies you dig what i'm saying I I I con on them a lot, you know, I have a fucked up memory. So, you know, I don't have a fuck

So so I I'm always, you know, like I always tell them, you know, stay with me stay with me But I'm coming when it comes to work and I'm working. I get it you dig But I just want to be sure that if I fuck it up, I want you to pick me up You know, I don't want to be waiting for you to give me the line if I fuck it up Give me the line you dig what I'm saying and and that's what they're there for bro And then they're they're really good at their job, you know, they really are that's a tough job man You gotta follow everybody's fucking shit, you know That is a tough right right think about that and you gotta tell people and you gotta tell like fucking big names

Like they gotta tell big fucking but on the flip side too They're like when you get to work and and you're seeing coming up You can just take them off the side and that's their job to go over all your lines with you You know, you can just rehearse with them, you know, so it's really cool, man. I cool. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Well, I just did this last thing for IFC The lady was dying right She was dying and they were so cool. See when I learned something that IFC they're on the set

They just look at the dailies and they say fine the show is budget is men's amends. It's not a big fucking budget ABC you got 20 people on the set with Suitsa And then I'm no fucking sense of humor or they're thinking about they don't Man, it's a business They don't give a fuck about your stupid little fucking joke you Cuban fucking moron We're trying to sell fucking diapers Right. Yeah, do you know what I'm saying? We're in the diaper business from eight to nine So whatever little joke you may have that you think is cute the diaper people but I watch nick at night

Like the kids channel after seven o'clock they go fucking nuts on that. Yeah. Yeah. They go fucking nuts on it. Now they start they stop like a Original program like they had on the chick from Seinfeld the old show. Fuck that shit. We're good. Don't put cartoons on old fucking night That's what you're on nick at night. Yeah, I don't even know why I talked about this. You're on unsolved mysteries I do that. I used to love that when I was it used to freak me out It's like the it's like the theremin music you have like they used to play that as it was getting creepier and creepier I hear was there like 95 or something. I was like early on my career and I and the guy I played man I look like him a lot. They're gonna say I shot that in red in california

And um, this is funny. That's a funny story. I'm sure you brought that up, you know You know, so I go out there and I'm all stoked right there. So I'm with this little town red in california, right? filming there's a reenactment and they they um, they made this big thing out of it You know, like they had my name in the front papers You know immediately when it comes to readying california to reenact so and so cast alright, so so check it out, bro So I fly back home and I have and I have my some shades on and I was wearing a slingshot And I'm showing my tattoos and stuff So check this out man

So and I have like about 20 copies of the fucking newspaper because hey, I'm kind of proud as my first, you know Kind of gig and I'm getting a variety of there, right taken to my mom and my family and shit and then uh So I'm waiting for my ride and then a cop pulls up another cop pulls up another cop pulls up and they shut up Um, we need to speak to you and I'm not tripping now because maybe this know that I'm just paying a part You know, but it's too soon because it hasn't even airy. I just finished it, right? And they go uh, what's going on? They said uh our supervisor feels like you're transporting drugs

And I said, okay, do you have any idea? And I go, I sure do got idea then then no more come they they this around me bro big time fucking aliex, right? So I pulled out my ID and I said look I'm gonna reach into my bag And I won't give you something so I as they're looking at my ID I opened up the bag and I fucking hand them all fucking use people my Face on the fucking headlines brother that I'm there, you know, and now all of a sudden now i'm mr. Rivera I'm fucking I swear to god. I'm fucking mr. Rivera, right and I'm fucking now flossing like a motherfucker I think you know I'm all bad as shit, right?

So they go mr. Rivera This is I'm so sorry, you know, we said that going and then then after they gave my shit, bro I said, you know what tie your supervisor about 10 years ago. I probably was transporting drugs just like that Just the fucking more bro. Fuck you. You know what I'm saying? Fuck you instant payback right there. I love so they stopped you in ready or no? When you land it but I was you know, I was kind of like, you know, that was like stuff young and still fresh You know off the streets and I'm in I'm going to tank top and have tattoos and I'm wearing some dark shades in the cab I kind of maybe I fit the fucking profile you didn't

Don't fuck with me, you know, because I'll fuck with you back and I did, you know, and I came up on top on that, you know Fuck it, but it says I mean it still happens once in a while, you know, I mean Like, you know the way I look I look, you know, I can't change that she like when I was check this out homie like say shit, right? So I'm fucking like about um Let me see five years ago four years ago So I'm all days out of town and I want to surprise you with this with this uh with uh with a nice rock, you know, you know wedding ring, you know, and uh, I had saved some money, you know, and um so I went to fucking I went to the

sales or something like that, right and uh, so I go there and I'm doing I I'm always, you know, you know, I'm going to I'm going to cap, you know in some shades and you know I dress like this, you know, I'm fucking jeans, you know regularly And then the lady go I go can I see one? I want to see your rings and she goes and she looks at me with that Fuck, you know, like um, like really kind of look like really very like disgusted look right to me, right? So she takes me over to the, you know, uh, like the little quarter carrot, you know, which which is cool You know, I don't care about size rings. I mean, I mean, I was looking for something a little bit bigger

But I'm looking for something nice for my wife. You dig so she takes me where I go I go, you know what those are beautiful rings, you know, but I'm looking for something a little bit bigger You know, and I knew I was looking for two carrots, you know And she goes she looks and she gives me even a worse look like Like like I'm a piece of really Mexican, you know, that kind of that kind of shit, right? You're gonna rob me. Yeah, yeah, exactly, you know, and then uh, and I'm in the fucking mall, bro It's like I'm not the run to some fuck at the run before you get away, right? Yeah, it's for effect. Yeah It's fucking helicopter

Little fucking skates and shit. So having James. Yeah, bro. You know what I'm saying? I mean, I'm not stupid You know me so so and I'm not a thief, you know Anyway, so she takes me over to like a half a carrot, you know, and then again, you know I could feel it already like this, you know, fuck this bitch, right? Anyway I go, you know what those are beautiful rings again. I'm looking for maybe maybe Two carrots carrot in half and she looks at me like Wow, like like really like now you now you're pushing the motherfucker, right? Anyway, so she gives me a fuck check this out, Joey. Okay

So she brings a fucking carrot ring which was a beautiful ring and I knew I had about 25 years to spend because I had put that away from All ladies ring, right? So check that, you know, when you go to a fucking when you go to A jewelry spot, they give you the motherfucking ring. You can look at it to lie. You could take it away Bro, this is just give me the ring. You're her. Okay, but you hold the ring Okay, now show me show me the ring Okay, now we're playing tug of war with it, bro. We're playing fucking exactly right exactly like that So then I fucking pull it away from her

And then check this out. So I'm looking at it and she and she's like on me, bro And then the kid in the back I guess he was we stalking her some shit. He comes out. He goes. Oh my god, Emilio Rivera Bro, I'm a big fucking fan. You know, the sons of anarchy guy, you know, he dug the show I'll go. Hey, man. Thanks a lot for watching, bro. All of a sudden, bro This bitch fucking changed, bro. Now now she takes me top shelf shit, bro She goes, oh, you're oh my god. Really? Okay. She don't he still don't know who the fuck I am But because the kid knows who the fuck I am

So now she takes me now I'm going now she takes me behind the fucking counter, bro You think I'm saying she's taking me these 35,000 dollars and I'm looking now, bro I'm playing the shit out of this. I'm going, you know what? I'm gonna get a 40,000 dollar ring. I'm going This might be the one because you know now I ain't buying shit from her, bro You know talking about I ain't gonna give her a shit But I'm gonna I'm gonna rock her broke the way she treated me. I treat her right back And I say, you know what? I'll be back and I call my wife and I told what happened

She was not wait. I come home and we'll get her my ring and I did, you know But that's how people people they look at you when I don't like that shit, but treat everybody Just give everybody the benefit of the doubt you dig what I'm saying, bro. Fuck that In her fucking face, bro, you know It's like that was like that scene in Pretty Woman When she goes in there by herself and they call her a dirty whore And she shows her a rich and gear with a credit card. Yeah, bro, exactly rubbing her feet You never saw that either. Yeah. No, I didn't know you didn't cock suck

You never saw Pretty Woman and stuff like that. That's terrible, bro. You know what I'm saying How often does it Not very often most people a lot of people You know, I've been blessed that most people are sons of anarchy fans, you know, so or gang-related fans or or just human beings You know, but you know, but I gotta be honest with you It did uh It changes how people treat you sometimes, you know, I mean, I know it's you know before really I mean I used to be noticed but after sons of anarchy became a it opened a lot of door

He did get open a lot of people's, you know, a lot of fans, man, you know Do you ever get that job because you're a little more light-skinned Little bit more light-skinned You know, man Is that rude? I'm gonna tell you something. No, no, no, it's not rude. No, I'm gonna tell you something, uh Sometimes it's how you look but sometimes people judge you with energy. Oh, yeah, that's true. You know Yeah, that's that's a good I've never had a problem with Amelia. I'm gonna tell you a story when I was doing blow And I was heavy into the blow

I used to live in this building and there was a black woman in that building But every time I would walk past that lady, I'd be able to say something about breath About you about me and after about a year one day I called her and I said, what the fuck are you talking about? And she told me she go you got deal with your demons She just started fucking going off on me. She was right. She was right, you know And she felt something it wasn't my appearance. I never did coke in front of I don't drink in front of you know What she knew I was doing something Was I insulted

For about four or five minutes and then I figured it out and I understood, you know, you know, you wear a fucking A black jacket with black leather jacket people were gonna perceive you or something, you know Especially if you're not on fucking tv Yeah, but you know what bro? I mean, that's that's not good though. No, it's not good. I don't like that. I don't like that I don't know because you know when I was younger and and um and no and give me wrong I was like, you know, I was always, you know I was a gang mode and I was dressed like a gang member all the time. That was my that was just who I was every day and um And people all you know, you see they're gonna be a dirty look or a scared look

It was one of those look it wasn't a it wasn't a welcoming look you dig what I'm saying And that's why you know, I see, you know, whatever you are you are because I was judged too many times, you know, so now there's nobody because I was really I could be a nice guy I mean, you fucking me. I'll fuck with you back, you know, but uh, I don't want to fuck with nobody So just let everybody be you dig what I'm saying. Yeah, were you polite when you like met people? I was always polite unless you were a guy like me If you were a gang guy, I couldn't be polite to you because I don't know the fuck you are You dig no they're just it just that they then it was, you know, eat each other up

But if it were just a civilian, I was always polite to civilians because I'm almost brought up to be polite, you know To be mad would have manners and so if you were just a civilian, we were good all the time, you know Unless you're treating me bad and not be a dick, you know, but But if you were another Chicano another gang member, I was not I was like I was very like well, you know You know, I was I was ready to go. We did that's because they were ready to go It's just it's just fucked up, bro. You know make you think what black people go to And some Chinese people and some you know Guys, we all go through some type of shit, you know

I can't imagine what a black dude goes to look at some dude got shot last night. You see that No, I didn't know where I did that shot last night in some neighborhood Got shot because he put up a Charles Brunson finger Oh, is that right with the gun? Did it come to me fucking times? Yeah, the cops They blasted them eight times because he put a handgun up that was his hand There was no weapon found there was witnesses saying don't shoot them. They just blasted Listen, man, we live in a different fucking society Judgment's fucking high

But I tell you Joey, man I won't be you know, because I gotta see both sides all the time you dig in and let me tell you back in the day I had that big mouth and I was a I was I was like, I didn't give a fuck so I'll call call the cops like you take off your badge, motherfucker Let's go, you know, and I got my ass beat by the shares and he started a Many a times, but there was nobody filming because we had nobody had no fucking cell phone and shit This is my time you dig and uh, I've been beat with flashlights valley clubs I've been beat to fuck by the cops, but check it out. But I was a dick, bro

I was like, fuck you punk. Fuck you pig. You know, I'll be like, I'll call you I'll take off your badge Let me see how you are So what it is is real simple now as I got older when they cops They pull you over put your hand on the dash to tighten the doctor in the mic Put your motherfucking hands on the dash for me Put your motherfucking hands on the dash. I mean, don't come out like I see one kid. I felt so bad On about about a month a year ago and uh, he turned around. He was wearing an ipad Headphones and he picked up his shirt. Well, all they shot saw was something shiny. It was just an ipod

But bro, just leave them motherfucking shit done. Let them find it. You dig what I'm saying Don't show it up because it looked like a fucking gun and they fucking lit his ass up shot him in the head He's done. You know what I'm saying? Just Do What they tell you bro, don't try to run don't try to and I now used to be that dick too, bro What they used to you know, I used to like like I could I'm stronger than you and now, you know Strong arm strong arm the cops and they would just know they would just jump you and beat the fuck out of you I'm talking about but I've been the other I mean, I've been I've been putting the straight jackets

I've been putting everything bro the cops have done the thing because I was an asshole So just do what they're telling you to do and you're gonna probably be okay, bro Don't fucking put out. I'm not gonna put a couple's no right now boy I'm not gonna put a finger on him, bro Because he's gonna say because that justifies That's for the fucking morning. You're gonna be playing games of fucking cops, you know, because you know at the same time, bro They're fucking they're they're like They're trying to prove a point. They're on fucking edge. It's for the fucking morning

They're always on there. They said they got a radio call of a guy robbing a bodega somewhere When they pulled up this guy was on a pay phone And he turned around while he was talking to put his hand up now They shot him there was witnesses some fucking a bunch of people said that they heard a bunch of shots You know, it's all fucking confusing, but I don't know what color the guy was And it doesn't matter, but if you just it doesn't matter what color you are, but if you just listen to what you're saying You might You might be okay at the end of the day, you know saying but anytime you're a dick

They can be the biggest dick and they gotta they gotta they gotta license to kill you, bro That fucking bass goes a long way. You ain't got that, bro. You know what I'm saying? And I'm not saying he's right, but man, I mean just but they're I'm tying you something I'm in the street, bro And I have a gun on me and I call you I say and you turn around you I'm gonna shoot you bro me myself As a civilian you dig what I'm saying. So, you know, it's it goes it goes both ways, bro You know, and I'm gonna be honest about that, you know, hey, bro cops job

Is fucking hard. I'm fucked up. I'm here to fucking tell you That's a hard job to do. That's a hard job to do and after two three years Realizing you're getting 36 42,000 a year with fucking overtime. What's 42,000 a you take home one take home one What do you fucking take home? What do you take home like 30? Maybe what do you take home to do? What to get you don't know who you're pulling over It's every night that you go out. It's a fucking mystery You never know if you're gonna come home. You know what? Yeah after a certain age. I don't like mysteries There was a girl in the northeast. It was in the boston papers, but it might have it might have been new hampshire

She died on her first day. I saw that It was for the first fucking day, bro. They did her ass up mom. Yeah. It's like a domestic dispute or something Yeah, she went again the dude shot his old lady and shot her Exactly. He's a new ex military guy too, man. It's fucked up. You know, probably fucked up in the head a little bit And that's just sad all the way around But then he did he killed himself too, didn't he? I I don't know. No, no, no, he didn't kill himself No, he killed his old lady and he killed the cop their first day on the job, bro You know saying fuck that

That's a tough job. So, you know, I'm not out there I just know that you hear things you read things you see things And then you see a lot of times you see that the part where The cops being the fuck out of that person But What led that to that? He just didn't want to go beat the fuck out of you. I'm talking about because see I got my ass beat a lot But you know what you were fucking with that dude for a few months

I know I was fucking with him every friday night when I was on the boulevard. You know, I'm talking about Why did I want to get busy? I wanted to try to prove a point. I'm gonna fuck up a cop. I really did that That was like that was I could fuck everybody else up. I said if I could fuck up a cop shit. I'm fucking fucking that's a hero right there you know Hood mentality you dig Shit, I got the short of the duo every single time, brother. You know what I'm saying You know, I could look in the face And tell you beside one misunderstanding in new york city

That was I had nothing to do with I was standing at the wrong place at the wrong thing I know you hear this all the time I knew the guy but beside that I never had a problem with the cop Every time I went to court. I made bail I had no failure to appear You know, I even used an alias one time and went back to court under the alias so he didn't have a warrant out for him I'm one of those. Have you ever used an alias and they fined because of what the warrant? Did I have a what? Have you ever used an alias and that alias comes up with a warrant?

Never. That happened to me twice, bro. No. Yes, sir. No. Fuck. It happened to me twice Well, but some dude I was I used to be friends with the dude and he is the weirdest that He called a friend of mine last week looking for my number I haven't spoken to him since 2009. I used to eat at this kid's house In 1978, bro He had three brothers two of them died of drugs. He's the only one left One night I get married I get home

And there's a note on my door. I'm getting sued By some credit card company And I can't figure it out. So we go online and we fucking look at my credit report. I'm getting sued by 18 fucking people Yeah This guy stole my identity That's fucked up, bro. And he bought stuff But in the process of the whole thing He goes, here's the best I get pulled over one night

He tells him his name is Jose Diaz. They got him a DUI He tells him he's me And he keeps telling me he keeps telling it's me he keeps telling him it's me he keeps telling him it's me Little does he know I'm an under arrest In seattle I'm an I can't make bail over the holidays That's funny. They keep asking him. He's like I'm Jose Diaz and they go, okay And they show them my rap sheet

And he's like, no, no, I'm not Jose Diaz Fuck you man. Yeah. Yeah. Listen. I uh sympathize cops jobs. I always had I couldn't be a cop after three or four years I couldn't do it the faith that we have or you or you were a cop No, no, no, no, but I had a friend who was a cop I had three or four friends that I grew up with that were cops and I knew how they grew up And I know that somewhere along the line. I heard different stories of them going fucking bananas, bro because You know, like I tell people when I was 15 my mom died

By the time I was 16 and a half my spirit was broken. You know, I lost faith um I uh, what's that word? I my my system. I didn't believe in god anymore. I didn't believe my my my basic Central belief system had broken. Yeah, I think when you're a cop and you see people who put kids in ovens and Four or five years of that shit dog. You go fucking crazy. I know I went I quit right there that that that type of shit burning and that that's it. I'm done shooting your wife I gotta show up in your head your wife's heads on a mattress I I fucking turn off the lights, brother. I mean you've been watching the people versus oj

I've been watching that. Yeah, I know that fucking series, bro. Let's talk you live you lived here. What was going on, brother What do you mean? What was going on in LA? From the time where were you when oj fucking was in the Bronco? I don't I don't I remember I was watching him on tv, you know, right? You were watching the basketball game Yeah, I was watching until then uh Well, you know oj would golf where I was after all he got that he had to quit it He would golf where I golfed and got a manabella golf I would see him there at the golf course, you know saying and it'll buy little he was not showing up to the golf course

We're here in there, you know, but um Man, you know, it's uh, I mean we pretty much all kind of like came to our conclusions What happened that night? But now when I'm watching the show it's like man, it's good to know what happened on the inside inside the ropes You know talking about it's a it's a trip. I'm really having I'm having I can't wait every Tuesday night How many how many more episodes I don't know I really saw that's not that's not it was so really good That's when he started doing the glove don't fit kind of thing, you know, and uh I'm digging that show and I got a few friends on the show. So it's pretty cool. You know, man

No, I love the show. I know it was gonna be good from day one And judge you to went to my high school, bro. So they kind of tied it all in together, you know I'm saying so that's good. You know the guy that's paying judge. You know, joy. Yeah, he's some sons from sons of He's doing a great job right now. I'm really proud of him. I'm fucking believe well. I'm good that guy is really good And you know, he was on sons of anarchy with us too. He was yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah There's somebody else on the show from son's anarchy, isn't there? No, there's there's there's uh, man. What's Jamal Jamal, I was on the other night. That's right Uh, who was there's a few of them, bro. You know, so it's fx thing, you know, and it's uh, paula paulson or sarah paulson the one who's playing

uh Marsha Clark. Yeah, she's doing a great job. You know, you know, she's from uh, the freak show, you know, yeah She's so good man now that and the guy who's playing uh There's a main motherfucker there, but the the the main prosecutor. I mean the At the prosecutor's garden. No, no, not the prosecutor's bureau and the judge and the black dude Okay, no John Travolta said I mentioned I found out what you're pure overall in the past, you know where we were when it was done with all that year

and Travolta's killing it, bro Because that's your purel, bro. I I hung on him for like 11 days when what they put together and uh, but uh Who's the good sir? Who's the who's the main guy the the the the black guy wrote the other guy that's uh, who leads it? I forget the engineer. No, no, no, no that is the who took over his appeal's job Come on, man. Oh Johnny Cocker Johnny Cocker that dude is killing it That dude's really he's gonna he's gonna he's gonna he's gonna get he's gonna get some awards next year. Watch this, bro Yeah, they're all they all do the sensational fucking Nathan Lane. Come on. Nathan Lane's Nathan. Oh my god

I was so happy. I just watched that episode last night the the third one And I came I didn't want I didn't know if we could bring it up But the time magazine where they made him darker. We were just talking like a racist like they made a fucking darker You know that you see that that's crazy weird how it is, man But they're doing any noise on the being inside the ropes right now watching it You know it's stuff that we didn't know about and it makes it um It's just it's just a trip man. It is a trip and I like how they have the angle of did she fuck christopher darden She hasn't yet though. I don't think she has yet, bro. No, but they're already bringing it up on the websites

So you can already see where they're going with this Right, right, right, but I love this. Listen when that shit was going on Out it's my world That was my secret passion to be a lawyer. All this is really yeah, all this is bullshit. Wow All this is bullshit I swindled my way into the university of colorado And they said to me, you know what man? You got to pick a major and I picked history And I was and I went before I picked the history major

I snooped around and since I was a c up student of colorado Opportunity snub because they were trying to get blacks and minorities In the university of colorado. I was like, fuck it. Why am I getting that paper? You know I'm saying I went I met with the dean of the law school when he was a mexican dude So I started talking to him. He's like, don't all you gotta do is do the thing Take the test take the client. I'll put you in here. That's what we're striving to do I was right there melio

I was right fucking there. What made you quit bro. I got arrested You could still be a lawyer if you get rid of it. No with felonies Really? Yeah, I didn't know that. Well, listen I think you'll make you a better lawyer, bro. You think all that is shit. Well in 1988 when I came out I would have had a 10-year thing to wait to get the family is sponge They said to me, this is what you could do. These are your options

You could go to law school graduate study for your bar and not take your bar To your thing as a sponge But still work at a firm maybe as a paralegal But again, you're a felon half these corporations won't hire you with the fucking felony. They can't So that's where you really were now paralegals. They're tremendous felons listen, let me tell you some

Somebody has to load their lip a guy like Shapiro. For example, Shapiro, you know, he's never done anything wrong He's an honest guy Where's somebody's got to load his fucking lip Somewhere along the line when you're in a turn you got to cross the line somewhere Morality you've done something. Look at look at later on now. They come out with Johnny Cochran had the two lives These guys have life experiences they know how to get around they know how to Swindle around, you know So I don't want an attorney. That's a fucking dead rag when I got divorced or I got this white dude

At this time today, I want to look him up and shoot this dude in the mouth Because I fucked up. I made a mistake with this dude. This dude had no Divorce experience. He had nothing, you know what I'm saying? But that was my fault. I didn't judge him correctly I didn't shop around. I've been there. I know what you're saying I know exactly what you said. I got burned like a motherfucker, bro. So No, my girlfriend's going through the process of becoming a lawyer and they have they have this amazingly long process of like They you have to account for where you where you've been for like the last seven or so years

You have to get people in the industry to like Have a it's like a voucher you and do like a reference with the bar and if you don't really yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, it's top dog. I didn't know that. I didn't know fucking. Yeah, it's worse than being a cop Yeah, and that's that's the fucked up part you could go to the three years of law school And not and just not pass the bar and not be able to be a lawyer Like they'll practice walking instead of passing the bar because you didn't you know, whatever you did miss the test But to pass the bar and and not be able to be because of your background. That's terrible, bro You know what I'm saying? I mean Johnny Cochran, bro. That guy is smooth, bro

that guy, um Now I don't know if that's what he was in life. I mean he's playing the shit out of him But what I see could I see the court, you know, it was just about every day when it was on, you know, I'm saying But um, I'm right now my mom and my wife watch it together. She knows that story like the back of her hand You know, it's a trip, you know, you guys grew up here during that just the yeah People would see him. I spoke to different people that Will go to that coffee shop or they'd see Nicole at that Starbucks by and I've done a couple of tv shows with you know with one of his best friends who turned later on

You'll see they haven't showed him his name is Ron ship. You know, he was big He was a big thing on the testimony as well. I've done some things, you know, Kato Kalin You know, I'm talking about some uh, because I remember there was one thing their publicist I was doing this on everything in Guatucco, Mexico And I guess they all had the same publicist because it was Robert Shapiro there Kato Kalin was there Ron ship was there and somebody else was there. So it was it was all I guess Ron ship was the black cop. Exactly Exactly. Yeah, they have I don't think they got to his part yet though. You know, I'm sure it's fucked up how

the black dude died Cochran died on Kardashian died and you know, Kardashian's the one that probably he's the one that had the most heart out of all of them He was more like the compassionate guy. You dig what I'm saying, you know Kardashian seemed like he really wanted to believe That this guy didn't fucking kill him He really But that all the evidence This is your friend, man

You've eaten with both of them. This is like something that you sit there and go You just want like come on. How do we get to here? And that's what happened But like that twist is set about when I said, you know, I think it was a Colombian necktie And they start trying to keep it was drug related you dig on saying which was a very good strategy, bro You know I'm talking about You know, listen, there was a great strategy. I love how they beat him. I love all that law shit And beat them but Jesus fucking Christ, it was crazy

I can't imagine living in the area and that would happen like I what the fuck do you do like you? You're like, Jesus This motherfucker went to work jack And at that time I was going through a bad divorce. You were oh So you can see you were like, yeah, you understand what I was going through. I was in My mind was cooking with this shit. I'm watching this one. This is how you get away with this shit But I got no money, huh? I gotta figure out how to do this on my own And go in there and fight this on my own. This was crazy Lee. This was a and they basically won

by the law He did what I'm saying. It wasn't they didn't it wasn't because they were losing by evidence, bro I mean, they were they were done It's just that he got Powerhouse attorneys, bro, and they knew how to work it, bro, you know, he got the Yankees, bro They did he got the Yankees, you know number three four five six and there were just hiring people for cnn They were they were badass, bro. They were really smart Even like last night's episode where Ethan said

Ethan they said let him ask to put the trial on the glove, you know, and that was really smart That was genius genius and he said he goes you because you can always object and he goes no objection. You're on it That was so good, bro. My head fucking blew up. That was so good But that's five fucking. That's what you get right when you pay for that type of fucking genius That's what you fucking get you get five savages And you know, it's funny because it is what you got, you know, because I remember growing up, you know, uh, I never had no money for uh For no, uh, but but attorney so I always had I always had a public defender And it's really weird because I remember I was facing a chart

I went on three to five And uh, they said and they was for something fucked up and and I've always had I've always had um public defenders and they always tell you Tell me the truth They just do it or not It's not gonna make a difference. I'm gonna defend you But I want them they always tell you that And whether you did or not you always say you didn't fucking do it, bro

I'm talking right now. You know, I'm talking about fuck that And and I remember and now I went to the judge and I said he said uh, if we go to today, how much we give them We'll give them three to five. So she said can we extend this to tomorrow? And he said, yeah, so check this out, bro So she was yeah, the guys I get that uh judges and asshole So I have a defender at the time, you know, I've always had a public defender for different cases and she so we come back the next day And he gave me three years formal probation, bro from three to five years in the joint I got three years from a different judge because they're all in cahoots together, bro As far as the public defenders and all that they all that they're all together. They all have coffee. They all do that together, bro

You dig well, I was telling Lee here's how it works You and I get pinched together If you get pinched first and processed first I win because you get a public defender. I get a public appointed attorney I get a court attorney. So now I get a real fucking attorney That the state pays for Even though we got busted together, we can't be both of us be with the same Department of public defender. I didn't that's I didn't know that a lot of people don't know that because that's conflict of interest

Right makes sense. You get the thing lifted. So Listen, the whole thing that I've been telling Lee for years because I love all that stuff I grew up in it. Emilio my mom And dad were always in trouble for book making And after a while all those Spanish people Went to one particular attorney and his name was sam deluca And when I was a kid, I would go there. I was the interpreter So I would go I'd be fucking 10

I remember I used to have to go to school from sunday to thursday catholic school And I would sleep that And there was weeks I would come home and go. Hey, you're not going to school this week because you gotta go the attorney with me I would look at this in the julio to see what that jew's saying You know, and I would go down there and I remember this is This guy gave me a this guy had I went in there So

She would take me down there and he would tell her Like he would break it down for you know, this was going on He would speak like a little Spanish. That's of how good of a sheist that he was He always wore a beautiful suit and he had a bang and blonde assistant that always sat in the room She had big tits and he would dictate to her, but he had a secretary But if he showed up to meet you he had this blonde with us. I meant he was fucking it And he basically would show up And she'd be in the room and he'd go get me the the toiro file the nor is he offer a cocktail

You know, whatever they give they drink scotch. He would drink a scotch. I mean this motherfucker was smooth They'd sit on they tell the norm. This is what happened The guy that called your bar was an undercover cop When you picked up the phone that made you an accessory to that draw. I don't forget like this was This was one of the many ones And he'd go, this is what we're gonna do. We're gonna have to fight it in In union city. I got this But in paterson

I could be taken care of So this is what we're gonna do and this is an easy situation. They take a piece of paper And he'd go, this is what it is. This whole thing if you plead out They give you eight you look, you know, I know you're gonna say you can't do it. I agree with you I don't want to do any of this. I agree, right? Oh, this is fucking brilliant. The guy we go. This is what we're gonna do If you give me 150 000 cash Plus my legal fees I'll get you

24 month probation You know, and then he'd run it backwards if you give me 100 000 I give you eight months in a can and the rest probation. You give me 50 000 A year of work release So you had options. Yeah, bro. Yeah, that's right And I remember me going talking to my mom and my mom, but okay. Oh, yes. Yeah, me bezel, bro Oh, yeah, but okay, then they send me bezel He was explaining this to you as a 10 year old

Yeah, and I'd be sitting there when he's doing his transit. I was just translate And then I would tell her and then she'd go came and she'd have to go home and talk to my stepdad And she'd go to the bar and they'd tell him and then they all call him a thief So he wanted that money on top of whatever he was going to charge them for the legal fees or a fucking But that hundred grand that 150 he could take it to the prosecutor Newark He'd take it to a judge there and he'd spread that and he'd take that case back to Newark You know, like let's say the the the court the case was out of Paterson the situation I'm talking about this particular time Was out of Paterson, New Jersey

He wanted to bring the court the case back to union city, which is Hudson county in Jersey city So he goes what we'll do is we'll have them drop the charges And we'll have union cities charges stick for something stupid and you'll do a year probation And they won't fuck with your liquor license You know what I'm saying? So we had options. We had a menu Lee a menu. That's that's the best way to put it We had a menu the thing is is even though if you did do it You still say you didn't do it that way your menu still stays like this You dig what I'm saying because you might have that that lawyer who has that heart and says, you know what I ain't gonna help

This motherfucker who did something bad, you know what I mean? So they're supposed to help people But you don't know everybody's heart. You don't know everybody's mind, you know, so always be innocent, you know Listen when I turned myself in for the kidnapping I kept saying I didn't know what the fuck I didn't know what the fuck was going on. I kept telling them. I don't know what the fuck's going on And they kept saying why are you here for a reason? I said, yeah, because the guys called my work And they said for me to come in I played like a fucking fool And when I met with that attorney

Not in the fucking clink because I got out with a different attorney, but then I got another attorney That's how I stalled the court by getting another attorney. I kept pushing it back But when I when I hooked up with this dude I had to pay him Emilio. He wanted money up This is a attorney attorney attorney attorney not a public defender. No, I had an attorney attorney Right, right. Okay, cool. And I remember I talked to like two or three different ones and the money was just Astronomical this is for a crime though, right? Yes. This is Yeah, it's every time you have to deal with an attorney

Listen, you rather be safe than sorry, especially to legal contracts You always find something in these fucking games or something in these fucking tv shows You always find the fucking by the way that dirty as fuck It's worth paying the 500 Or whatever the fuck what do you mean? What do they mean? What have they done to you? Hey, Emilio, what's the shit they put up in contracts that we don't even see? Oh, no, you know what? No, I'm as far as that that's been good to me because my my agent is very thorough Bro, you know, I'm talking about so I've been good and you have a legal attorney though

I think they have what we're at though. You know, we're here at forever So what what they do they're very thorough and then they'll say, well, you know We're this only thing that worries us a little bit and what do you think about that now? But there's a way around that so I'm really it's good to have An agent who has a good attorney and then because out of stuff because I don't got time to read I don't even fucking understand someone's half the stuff I read bro. You know, I mean, so that's their job You know, that's why we pay them, you know But but as far as uh, but I've had to deal with attorneys attorneys

Through my divorce and That was no fucking job. That was the worst ass Fuck it. I ever got in my in my life. Yeah, that was the karma. Well, I pay for those attorneys. Do you know Lee? I got separated in 1991 and I have no reason to lie to nobody in this room Do you know in 1997? I was still making payments to the attorney monthly You know, I didn't pay that attorney until 1998. I got that Taco Bell commercial Seven years that's belonging to fucking car. Do you know how much money I gave that car that guy up front? Do you know how much money I gave that guy off my cards my credit cards?

I went over max on all my cards to pay those guys There was a point when I was working for the sports betting service I was giving those guys 500 a week just to see my daughter Just for the communication back and forth. Yeah, it was craziness I remember looking at my ex-wife going, you know what the money that we're spending We're gonna put it through college already 4 000 a month for two years. We've been arguing on back and forth And you know what sucks about that is yet, you know, my my my her attorney was 80 000 My attorney was 60 000 and it could have been done bro at 30 000. It could have been done quick

It's just that they want they want to drag it on We're gonna do it till you're broke mother fucker, you know Yeah, bro, and you know, and you know when you're married you got to pay that shit The man pays for that the second time around when you guys are divorced and you want to do the only shit That's on the room on them But the first time around bro, that's all that's all that shit cost me I paid for listen. I didn't pay the whole bill off What year are we right now 2016 2012

Was that when I paid the bill off Of a divorce in 1991 Wow Yeah, and all that money could have just been like put aside for all she did she said and I told her I say no glue man We could stop this right now. Whatever money I have left over in the bank, you know, we could spend 50 50 Don't give it to another, you know 50 to him, you know, and she kept on going with the man I know it's a ugly thing, bro. But it's just that Is that fucking hate like I'm gonna get you back some kind of way. Well, mother fucker. You're the one that

They fucked it all off anyway, you know, I'm saying so what the fuck's going on over here, you know It was fucking crazy. It's ugly, bro. It's like divorces. I don't wish that I don't wish you on nobody I don't know how you feel Emilio, but I know Joey you're not fond of your ex-wife Is it as part of it just the amount of money you just get mad thinking? Like they lost that amount of money Money is one part of it Money is one part of it The fucking sadness of parting with it the sadness of making it

And you give it to somebody to argue for you It was when I didn't have it. I was not in that position to do that at all I was living in a fucking basement apartment With a trinitron. I used a bench for a table. I had a couch. My bedroom was a mattress There was no furniture in the bedroom. It was a mattress. The place was clean. It was immaculate the shower I kept everything clean. That's not the point. I lived like an animal to pay an attorney Yeah, yeah, you know when I got into comedy it was to just to disappear I was like Clint Eastwood when he went to Italy and made those three movies

I took those triple runs in montana and all that shit and I disappeared I would show up at hotel. I totally I would show up places and they go dog the phone for you. Hello, mastercard Well, Joey, how are you? You're over six thousand nine. You know what that's like. They found out my comedy once Yeah Lee you have no I divorce is something that and they dig brother They'll be digging and then and then and that attorney's job that you're paying him to dig into your shit I mean You're paying her attorney to dig into all the money you make or whatever money you're making money

You know saying it says so it's a did you guys have prenups? You know on the flip side of that, you know, I did I brought her I Made everything with her, you know, I had owned I had owned like four homes and at the time we broke up So I had a lot of I had a lot of how do you say? a lot of I don't had a lot of stuff, you know to do a property and cars and motorcycles and

Little bit of money here and there and uh And they dig it all up, bro You know they dig it all up and uh and even the stuff that you thought you had hit Actually comes up too, bro. You know I'm saying that's that job and I'm not you know I would like I said I would have still loved to have been an attorney I always leaned towards criminal attorney because I grew up in it. I saw how it was done. I saw it was all connections I saw that it was simple. You went you went for the prosecutor's office for six or seven years You made yourself around you got to know everybody and all of a sudden one day you go. Fuck it

I'm switching this motherfucker for a long time. I was on defense. I'm on offense now. It's a different game I fuck 60 000 a year to prosecute motherfuckers Now let me go on the other side of the ball. You know everybody You know everybody and my specialty is drugs. How's that for you? So you get busted by la pd for drugs That's my mother fucking specialty. Okay pretty soon. You get yourself two three fucking dudes that get off Guess what that's word of mouth. That's better than twitter jack. What were the name of the law from being? You got that right It has to have something jewish and it isn't coming

The air isn't going down No, man, and I'll tell you what even I wouldn't have had to found these but I would have had the street knowledge And the lingo And I would have spread money around To learn what the fuck was going on. That's the number one thing is knowledge You know, listen, it was no It's no fucking listen if you put the yankees up Against the triple a team. They're gonna beat them 10 out of 10 times

The la pd the la District attorney's office at the end of the day did not have the tools to beat oj's team Even with fucking evidence. That's how That's how much money could buy law like that Law is basically and simple What is it? What do they say lifting the doubt? Reasonable doubt reasonable dot and if you watch what happens in the oj trial That's exactly what they did

Reasonable doubt a drug dealer did it Reasonable doubt golem and sprinkled the fucking thing and they described how he did it, which is brilliant I'm telling you how he did it. I'm a marine If you remember the case they'd go into a detail with the fucking guy, Nathan Lane When he says to him, how'd you do it? You hit in your sock like a fucking marine. I was a marine. That's how I would do it He drew the picture for all those things are brilliant And the defense you're not gonna go in and not know how he did it

Listen, let me tell you something. Let me tell you that type of criminal idea When you tell me something happened if you take me to the crime scene and you give me a day, I'll tell you how it went Because I was there I know exactly how that thing went down I know exactly how they went in I know is that now it's too high-tech. I'm 30 years out of burglaries the shit like that But back in the day you give me the layout. I know exactly because that's what I did all day For years. I walked around looking at a building going. How would I get in there? Yeah, that's that's a criminal mentality. I tell you know, like it's not this is hard to be a criminal now, bro I'm saying now they fucking catch you a cat here on your pants. You're done. You're done

You cannot you know, you could do legally book make you got cameras I'm wearing this fit bit right now. This is more for Tommy. Everybody knows where I'm at right now, bro You know what I'm saying? We got these phones. Everybody knows where you're at right now right now. That's communism You don't even know how communist that is that cell phone. I'm rewatching the last season of house of cards before the new one They can search facial recognition just from street like like you can't get away with shit no more. No more the body's over. They'll find you The body's over here. I mean you guys should now they're using nowadays that should get any stuff that happened 30 years ago, bro You know what I'm saying?

Like that now. It's it's a scary. I mean it's a good thing, but it's scary at the same time, you know Fucking something catch up to you. You never know what it's going to be How long did it take for you to like not look at a house in case it? There was a time I got you know There was a time I would drive down streets And look at houses in my imaginary criminal mind I decided in that house there was drugs Especially living in colorado because in colorado colorado was the midway point

So instead of sometimes They would get drugs in from texas And they would take them in colorado and park them for a few days then distribute it from colorado to la Montana Minnesota you follow me So and I knew I knew a couple people that would tell me you see that place over there That place is filled with coke You see that van there. There's cameras there. There's every oh, you know when I was a kid

I saw this and what I grew up thinking like that, but probably 20 years ago When I stuck it in fact sometimes I look at places and I still do security I'll come up here. Go come here The fuck is wrong with you What the fuck is wrong? You got to put two blocks on that You got to put a window on that you got to close that fucking gate. I look that's the first thing I look at My wife's got a big purse now Yeah, that's the opening up the purse like oh come here. Did you see the guy behind?

Yes, I know I go the bigger the purse the bigger the target Okay, if you're gonna fight me you're gonna kick me in the stomach. Don't kick me in the head I got a big head. Well, look at the stomach. You can't miss. You know what I'm saying You follow me so the bigger the target the more I could jiggle your purse The more I look at people I can break them down. I could tell You know, I had friends that were professional pickpockets. I can never do that shit But I see them. I see people that are giving you their money I see the fucking whole thing go down when I look at that

I look at a now you can't you can't do nothing because there's cameras Unless you break into a place and you know exactly where it is It has to be an inside kind of thing that has to be an inside kind of thing You know exactly where it is and you're in there wearing a hood Well, see I was never I was not me myself. I was never a thief guy. You know, I was always a I guess, uh, you know, a fuck you up kind of guy, you know, I'm talking about so I never really and I So I'm a very trusting guy as well. Another thing to try to fuck them right rob me I remember real fast

So you better be able to fucking run on me because if I catch on kick your head You know saying that I had no problem doing that, but I will not steal from you You didn't I'm saying so when it comes to that I'm very trusting bro because I I don't I hate thieves I hate fucking thieves and um, I got I caught I caught I've caught thieves before, you know, I mean literally red handed and I fucked them up Well, I mean that was a good time to fuck them up because Because you know, they took your shit, you know, or they try to take your shit, you know, but um, yeah, I've never I've never been Did you get in trouble for it or no? No because they were hoodlums too, bro. You know saying so

No, fuck no, I didn't give us the cops didn't come Amelia when I was a kid No, no, no, no, no, I did it. It was uh, it was uh, it was a it was a street thing, you know, uh Amelia when I was a kid I never in my life thought of stealing nothing from nobody Nothing Nothing like I remember when I was six I had to go to a place one time with my family And they were like, well, Antonio, you're out there, but that's what bong is

And I wouldn't do it. My mom said something to me She was like, you know, take a piece of bread. They're not gonna say nothing to you And I remember it was like a sample Like I could break it like I wouldn't do it. Yeah. Yeah And then I started going into A poorer section of new york I started hanging out by my godmother's house and I started hanging out with these kids I had nothing So that mentality fucking put me in arms and then a year later we had to take a flight to Puerto Rico

I don't know if you remember the 70s if you flew first class in the bathroom that was creams and shampoos and Hand conditions is oh, yeah The 70s was different in first class. There was flowers in there You sniff the flowers the sink worked. I go in the bathroom one day. Let's see those perfumes. I go back to my chair My dad my mom asleep and I take the fucking puke bag And I go to the bathroom. I fill that motherfucker up with all those creams and my mind me and my buddies will sell these That's 50 cents a pop. That's funny. He's gotta be expensive. That's not that's not but that's not steamy joey. I mean Yeah, come on. I mean I was telling lady the other day them my stepdad had this jar of fucking coins

Like he had a big bottle of a do or not do was j and b or something. I mean it was huge You got it from the distributor And it was filled with pennies and silver dollars And every afternoon I would take two or three silver dollars or not. You know what I'm saying? I would kill them He asked me I don't know what happened to me. Emilio, but then the drug the drug epidemic Destroyed me and my big thing was flipping weak drug dealers like punk-ass bitches. They can't they can't call the cops Yeah, no, so when I was when I was no guy for 20 years and we were cool

And all of a sudden he started slinging coke and all of a sudden he was Scarface And I knew this motherfucker that could take it. He didn't know that I would you know what I'm saying Like are you fucking kidding me talking to me like that dog? I'll give you have your shit right now. I'll take your shit right now. You would yeah And I would oh my god, I would cause so much fucking having That's fucking for you But if you see let's see what you see my thing was you know, my dad had me working since I was eight years old I was paying rent

I used to get paid 30 dollars a month a dollar a day and then when I got paid I had to give my dad 15 dollars for rent you did so have my check every every fucking payday, right? I just throw the paper back in the day and then uh so my dad's biggest thing was Stealing you work like a man you make money like a man. You don't need to steal so I've always been working bro, right? And just and just top it all up bro. You know when I was 21 I get boosted for a robbery arm robbery, right? And it wasn't me. It wasn't me I even they the king of my fucking jail cell. I was I was I was an armed guard and they my lieutenant comes in there and

Fires me in my fucking cell, right? So out of all this time I was 19 they fucking um my dad's in court When me fighting a robbery the most it was the most How are you humiliating thing for my dad even though? I couldn't say who did it because this was a neighborhood thing you did and so you have to ride the beef wherever it gets caught That's who rides a beef and I wrote that. Oh, that's the way it is brother. Yeah, I said we run it when you're when you just do it You you're doing the time for somebody else

But you know, but then again people have done time for me you dig what I'm saying So, you know, it's just it's just part of a neighborhood thing, you know And uh, it was I fought it for two years and then I ended up beating the fucking case But the thing is um, see I was a kind of and then at the same time see even though when I was doing You know, it's heavy into drugs My word was always good. So you could front me like an eight ball I'd pay the fuck if you could front me an ounce The thing was like I was I kind of like I was always like a mean guy

So I could go to your house at three in the morning and I know it's late to go pick up drugs But I'd be like listen They'd be like, hey, it's kind of late homie, you know, and I say yeah, homie I can do this you can front me the shit because you know my mom was good or I can take all your shit What do you want to do? And they would just front me the shit of course because nobody wants to take up your shit You know saying but I was always a nice guy that way because my money my word was always good and seeing the streets, bro Sometimes that's all you got is your word. You know, you got nothing else but your word, you know

And that's going to carry you a long way, you know and uh And that's just the way I was, you know, I front me and you would get your money But if you didn't want to front me, I would take your shit, you know me So usually everybody would just front me, you know, I used to get pissed off at people Like if I was a solid dude with a person that I asked for a solid And they were looking me the wrong way I would say that's cool. Well, I always kept it in mind. I always held that like that little brudge Oh, no, well, fuck that

Especially when you were when you're fucking when you're fucking jones in bro for a fucking up for a hit or fucking up for for For any kind of kind of hit bro. Fuck that. You don't want to be telling you know, but I'll drop them with a fuck Oh my god, they would tell me no they get pissed and I would just remember And then dog. There was one dude That pissed me off for four fucking years That's too long. You understand me. You understand me. You ever have somebody piss you off for four motherfucking years How about you on this side? I don't got that patience. This guy pissed me off the first day of high school Oh in school. Oh, yeah all the time

Like he pissed me off. What did he do? I have no idea his existence pissed me off It says he lived with his mother, but his his grandmother's he was grandmother was affratal And his father had left his mother. This kid just bothered me dog And like he was you know those people that crack little jokes about latinos or something He was one of those guys that he'd invite me to his house to watch football And he'd go oh, you know, I gotta watch the silverware Even if you know, I'm saying like stupid shit

Thumb shit that I you know, it doesn't insult me. Yeah, but what do you gotta say that's shit for you know what I'm saying like And then he was one of those idiots that got a nice car When everybody knows his father, but his father wouldn't come around and And you could see he was half retarded in one day He got into a beef And it was his fucking beef. He created the fucking beef The dude showed up with ten fucking Puerto Ricans. The dude goes. I want to fight you You gotta fight him. What do you want it to do the next day?

He was mad at me and my buddy. It's like this guy should have fucking done something Why would she we do something you get on the dude's girlfriend the dude came back like a man He could have just came out of the woods and hit you with a stick This guy came like a man accused you and said let's do this shit and you fought him and he knocked you the fuck out What what the fuck do you want from a clean fight then? But I never forgot that that the next day people going dog He's saying that about you guys that you guys stood around. No, we didn't stood around They didn't get jumped or you just don't get fucking jumped. That's on him

The dudes can't he pulled up at the wrong police and he pulled up to see the chick And the dude was there. Yeah. Yeah. He got busted flat out busted and there we are You know and the dude said dog what up with this, you know, she's fucking been talking to me. He was a kid Yeah, fuck you. What the fuck? What are these guys doing here dog? We're gonna have to do this the right way They blasted themselves with 22 punches the dude. I was with in the the whole way home. The dude was pissed Motherfucker broke my no, okay About a week later. I'm hearing all this stuff about the guy Then I would see him and he'd be cool

but there was always a fucking remark and And then he graduated high school and he went to work Well, one summer he got us all jobs in the neighborhood roofing And it was like fucking slave wages And we had to be that sun in the morning. It was a tough gig And one day one of the roofers almost fell off the roof and he's like give me a hand and my friend clapped Everybody got fired. So he was always pissed at everybody for that sun that summer thing Junie year in high school and he always made little fucking comments

And then the cocaine boom came, you know, cocaine was problem that shit came people that didn't do Nothing wrong with doing shit that was wrong. Oh, yeah And this is a lot of people brother this chick got like one of those white chicks that like coke rocks in the pussy and he doing deep He said fucking this bitch needs blow. I gotta just become a dealer And that was my moment to shine. I knew he had coconuts And he had the retarded aunt or the retarded grandmother And she was in the kitchen watching novellas. Do you know, I walked in there with her in the kitchen I was not a big guy, but I was always light-toed. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, like I was like a vampire. I had like vampire toes

Not like fucking harsh with foot over there And I walked in and I fucking took his fucking blow like a gangster And walked out and he came to my house and I was like, I know it's you and I did the smartest thing I went to the deli on and brought a 20 Because I knew he was gonna go to deli on and see you say cocoa. He was yeah, he was just here He just bought a 20 you take the bus ride home So we set him up. It was like, oh jay. He couldn't do that to me because I had a defense. You follow me. Yeah, yeah But it was fucked up. Where does the cocoa come from?

I know you all these years, but I don't know the fuck when I was a kid I was I'm so white that my dad man. I say oh, it's a little longer than cocoa All right on dig it dig it. Okay. So it's stuck this stuff. Yeah, it's stuck. I didn't like it, but it's not as a cool It's cool. But then when I moved to LA, I just couldn't use joe dears. There was already a joe dears at sag So the guy goes you got a nick name. I go cocoa And you know, it's crazy people will call me and they go. Oh my god. I love cocoa. You know Yeah, that's good. It's good. It's good. Lee. What's going on over there in your world? Look at the shape of you He's he's eating pot cookies

He's getting all fucking crazy over there. Let me give some shout outs real quick here My main man Sean Barrett, Ashley Crowe Michael Hutter Brandon Carrier Dan Roskowski Diana Mateo Reggie Bartlett And the whole motherfucking church family. I love you cocksuckers here Emilio boom boom Rivera in the fucking house. Lee. What's going on? 46 bomber. I saw on instagram. You said this dude is freaking hilarious. So that's that's for you joey right there

46 bomb Whoever you are reading all your comments right now, man. Oh, here because this uh, this is from uh Jack M night. This is who we saw in vegas joey dears. Very good. A great combo. Ha ha ha. Thank you frank. Panky 22 Right on Now there's a nice night man people listen. I gotta tell you something people fucking miss sons anarchy People really fucking miss sons anarchy. I don't hope he went over to some show with vikings ugly fucking people That ain't gonna work. That ain't gonna work over the outsiders. The outside is a bunch of people

I'm digging it man. I don't know if it's sons anarchy sons anarchy did this thing that created this thing and it was just You know, it was something that nobody had seen before Since the wild one, you know what I'm saying, right? I mean, yeah, dane cook road motorcycles with that With fucking the basketball player that was date madonna In that one movie and shit like that But none nothing about a fucking motorcycle gang And how they did it and you want me to tell you what the craziest thing is I think we had this discussion last time the comparisons between

miami vice And fucking sons like all the same little aspects how they added the music during the chases They're all a little fucking cool like cool music It makes it cool. It makes it even cooler. You know, there's so many little things they play miami vice from like five To eight every morning on hell rate channel. Robert radriguez plays the only y'all right over there. You You're falling asleep. I'm good You match that picture perfectly That guy did a fantastic job. It's a great man. Oh my god

You know, they're gonna it's Listen, I was a kid. There was the courtship of valley's father. Great. There was the family affair You know, and then they blasted then they blasted you with the motherfucking waltons And with that, you know, then they blasted they had all these family shows That was just brilliant fucking shows But it was all in that family genre And then cbs started strong family values, bro

Strong family values then after nine o'clock a wife. I've always come on on monday's Manics, uh, the fat guy. What was the cannon cannon? Yeah, yeah, yeah cannon was 400 pounds leany go like this and the bullet would go around them tremendous Canon uh, kojak beretta. There was beretta kojak. Toma was first. So who's tomma Toma was first. Oh my god. Remember that. There were all these shows And you sit there and they did a lot. They did a lot, you know In in a way a sign that live did a lot in a way the mod squad Side fell do a lot the mod squad room 222

That came after the mod squad. I mean that was kind of family oriented. Yeah, it was very family oriented This was all these shows and there was only three networks right 224 and 7 there was no fucking fox yet. So all these family shows man and all of a sudden like I think I'm just in what I don't know. I'm just a dummy. Okay, since I've been around I didn't like the fucking show but

Did it set a tone for tv? Cheers I watched it more after we after it was done because everybody made a big deal about it And actually it was great cast of characters, bro. It really was. You know, they really was to me the last Really good cast a comedy show and the proof is in the pudding in my world is taxi So many people came from time one of the best one of the best ever so many people came I've seen a couple episodes. No, you gotta watch it. You gotta watch just for the argument sake. What do you think about friends? It's not I've never really watched it friends did something different

Friends set a tone You know now more fucking morons active goofy everybody acted goofy Now more people now these fucking gentiles acted goofy and that was friends came out Because when the friends come out, let's let's be honest Okay I'm just for for the sake of arguing. I have no idea what taxi bro is the shit, bro There was there was a you call the stars that came out of that, bro, you know 94 94

Okay, I got divorced and I started dating this girl And that's all she fucking never did was watch friends was watch friends and her and all her goofy friends That's what they did. They went and drank coffee. That's why we're not together no more. I mean, you know It was too fucking It was too goofy for me. I came from it. What can we drink coffee? Who drinks coffee? You're 22. You should be on second deck What coffee what fucking coffee who drinks coffee in your 22? And you actually probably said that to her verbatim

Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, I got this fucking allergy season is destroying my insides here Now, you know, I didn't know that was a different listen, man When I was 15 you went out every night only watch fucking tv. Okay When I was 15 on saturdays if you had a girlfriend you stayed in maybe Maybe on saturday night and you swapped spit during the love boat And uh, the fucking midget with the island and the whole fucking day Who the fucking kid and then you stayed awake when grandma went to bed your finger during the midnight special And started that live you'd watch don curses rock concerts. Yeah, wolfman jack. It was cutting edge tv, but not

Listen, man The soprano started a wave of shit, right? They did the shield the shield first the shield first And the soprano started something that the sons of anarchy ran with They knew what happened with the sopranos the chick died that destroyed the whole fucking show Once the mother died that fucked the whole show up They ran with a gemma lived for the whole thing. Yeah to the last season That's what they wanted with the soprano for it to turn over to a woman at the end At the end if she would it live you would live the pilot was the whole show is driven for at the end

It's him and her but she's really running the family Do the actress died or did she get fired? She died. Okay She died the second or third season. I don't know. Oh, no, I know she died in the show I'm right. She died the second or third season. Why did they kill her off? No, she just died in real life During the oil then they used her head For two episodes are pointing at him and then she died. She immediately died Which was but that was their plan was at the end It was going to be a woman

Who ran this family through the sun? I could see that Okay, that's what it was supposed to be the same happened through years with sons of anarchy She was the what do you call the iarchy of the family matriarch matriarch of the family? Yeah, yeah And she you know, they all fell apart or something happened to her and then over the seasons They tried to fucking rape her and pull her hair and she was tough man. She she was tough You know, they did everything to her and they came together for us. So that's the soprano So to want it, you know breaking bad is very intense. You know, I know people been fucking Hitting me up lately about narcos. Is it back or not back yet? Let me check. I don't know. I haven't seen is it good

You haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. It's good. Yeah for me and you Very interesting. Mm-hmm. It's like again Look at if you're 24 right now if you're lee and you're watching oj You you're into it But it's an education to you. It is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's an education. But if you lived it is more I'm just interested because I'm seeing like you said i'm inside the ropes now and it's a trip, bro You know, it is a trip, you know, how smart they were, you know, I mean, how really it's interesting, bro

it's interesting you're telling me that you wanted to be a lawyer before because uh I never would think that from you, but that's good. No, I love that. I can't you got your mind going all the time I can't explain to lee neither can you Who oj was to you and I oj was a badass, bro Was I a fan of oj? Was I a fan of the bills? No, but let me tell you something dog If monday night football was on and oj simpson was playing on monday night football Lisa yat, you watched that fucking game whether you hated the bills whether you were when they were in the conference Because that's how much that's how good he was

Is he would smile the camera loved him, you know, he was non-assertive You know, you just loved them. Then he's running through airports. You know, I never would be like lebron james or something Blah blah blah what I said maybe lebron james No, um, yeah, well, you know different two different sports, but I mean he would be like, um He was like a shit like a Franco. Well, they were on the same tank Who do you really like on new england patreons tom rady? I guess what if tomorrow morning you woke up and tom tom rady killed michelle boom boom boom Yeah And they found the club

When I call if kobe killed his old lady like something like that like that's fellow basketball like that's that's that's how best That's how big it was and then what I want you to have a stake in it. You don't have a stake in kobe For some reason at that time the country had a stake in oj You had, you know, then he went on to modern life football movies. I wore his jersey when I was a kid Once you started doing movies forget it. You fucking loved oj simpson. Yeah It's coming out in august What is narcos? Oh, it's coming back. Yeah, right on Did you go did you read for that joy?

No, I nearly did right man So you figure anything with drugs you think they had me reading for it, right? I thought for sure you were gonna read for it. I'm surprised and I know the first season They didn't have a lot of big names except louis guzma And they they I still you know episode four or so So he's not on there for the whole goddamn thing But no, there's not too many shows even I I go back to season one or sons Sometimes when I go from the comedy store, bro, you're fucking white you get home and Jimmy Fallon ain't gonna have somebody on

And it's a stat. I don't like Jimmy Kimmel. I watch Jimmy Fallon You know, I watch vinyl On HBO, you know what I watch from stuck on fucking other naked and afraid every sunday night. You're watching that You haven't watched nicking refer you I guarantee you and get stuck on that Discovery they throw people out there naked 21 days, bro But naked you get a knife and you get you get a particle that you get like a flame thrower like a flame starter And a knife and you gotta run 21 days, bro And I just put a post of the day about that because I know I know I couldn't do I hate fucking snakes

And you gotta get food in your own food. You gotta kill you gotta eat whatever you find brother. Whatever you find I mean these people kill a frog and that they act like it says like the biggest meal they've ever had They hide and so compile that I like to do Survivor man that you watch him and they let him out there in the weeds with a fucking thing on I've watched him two or three hours that shit. That's entertainment. At least I had that's something that you can look up You know, they dropped this motherfucker off in the woods years ago And any place he goes to he makes a little hut He figures out something to fucking you see but that's the guy but he knows what he's doing, bro

These people are people that think they know what they're doing or they they read all about it And now they gotta live listen. I can't watch somebody who's out there kill themselves I don't know what the fuck i'm doing out in the wilderness Like I don't know what to eat I don't know you can just about anything bro. I mean you can't you know, you can eat a snail you can eat out You can eat ants you can eat a They eat out any possum of the day, but this is a possum to see no good, you know But you're gonna eat snares that I have so fucking scared of snakes, bro

See I would start because there's nicks. You just there's not a snakes, but I just Why don't you like snakes? You think a possum And you cut that ugly head off and you skin that motherfucker quick and you marinate them and something You know what if you cook any of those That's what i'm saying if you marinate anything, they'll be good a cat A monkey. It's gotta be good. There's white meat, you know, I've been reading about that I've been seeing some videos and that she's fucked up

Well, they say there's a couple of restaurants in california that are allowed to bring in Eight dogs to cook them and sell them to the to the consumer They can't tell you the name of the restaurants, but there are a few restaurants out here that are allowed Totally last week the people who make the dumplings in korea. I just read. No, it's not yes, it's them. I guarantee it's there Yeah, you know That's that fucking mexican place you go to on the corner there where they got in trouble selling lizard Eight years ago. They just made a comeback. Listen. Oh, I don't care if you get caught for selling lizard I don't even walk in that area

Like I don't even walk on that side of the street Am I gonna settle down? I'm supposed to know they got caught for a lizard because this is what I do You're supposed to you don't like yelp, and I'm supposed to do like a new search yelp ain't got dick You gotta ask the people in the neighborhood. They fucking tell you It's a good place Barbershop, they fucking told me over there by that park. I take mercy They were like sushi that one oh one people get sick in there I said, you know what brown people say it's great. Yeah, you know

And you know what somebody said to me people get sick over there. What did I do one day? I don't mean I wasn't there. Guess what happened. I got sick. I woke up in the middle of my shit and blood but fucking Cat eye balls coming out of my asshole shit like that I need that. No, I had no cat eye balls But you get my point guys. I got sick did I get fish sick? No, I got weird sick So I know when you get fish sick and ain't no fucking two hours. Yeah, that's a different thing Like when lee got sick and he blame on the pot cooking

He ate wholesale sushi. He went over to one of those places I would take into you know, you didn't I saw the fucking bag there because he goes to these yelp places People use yelp or fucking retarded. Anyway, who goes home and says that place is great. I mind my business I don't say dick You know, but you know On lee's side out like we when I go somewhere before I go someone I'll say okay What does y'all say about it like mainly like shooting ranges and stuff like that, you know How you know what they're gonna ask for, you know this and that you know

But um, what about food? No, not too much because you know, I'm pretty much a creature of habit, bro If I like somewhere like if I want if I want a pizza, I know where to go if I want mexican food I know where to go if you want mexican food. Where do you go? I go I go to um Tapioca in an easterly It's up, you know, every year it's manuals, you know, so you still go to easterly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's that's that's a That's a best stop, bro. Um, I don't want to say what's good fake mexican food because I don't want to put anybody on blast like that But um, I'll still eat king taco and put a blast to anybody. You know, you know king, you know king

I'm driving back It's just it's too now. It's too. How do you say it's too? Do a commercial lie. I mean they already have it, you know, it's just like a you know, they got poppers I like popper. I like popper. They got them. They got them. They got them there. I want to tell you the best Mexican food comes out of the taco truck right there on a fountain. I got bad one the other day. I'm so mad Okay, I'm found in a fucking uh, no no no no no Western Wilmington like Gilbertson veils house. They got some good stuff there, right by the fucking vfw the best

Toddler is there is there with a burrito that means 50 cents a piece Yeah, I'm gonna squeeze you right You have no fucking idea. You and I Wilmington flooded. I said a prayer for the taco man Fuck Wilmington and Gilbert as long as the taco man lives. That's all I get before nobody understand Long live that I'm serious. I miss I regret it and miss it you know 40 little league listen, I

Break your balls. I can't I don't have the right to break your balls because Years ago when I met Felipe and I met you It was party and and all those guys Do you think I did those gigs for 40 dollars because I wanted to make 40 dollars? part of joey's method Was meeting head would say one And all those kids that would have his gig was we'd smoke pot and then we go eat mexican food That was my gig. I knew listen. I never got mexican food fucking hollywood. No like that

Because I had those guys that gave me the fix I know about king taco people goof on king taco to me king taco is Some place else is bad food because they got chorizo and papa and chicharron this so I'm good I'm good with those three right there. I can go to that with the other truck king taco, bro When they have it on the truck, I like that one better than the actual restaurant. Yeah, I'm saying, you know And they got some taco trucks in LA that are phenomenal, but I'm I haven't fallen in for the taco trucks insane yet I am you know, I've always I've always enough taco trucks. I want dirty taco junk

That's I don't want john refavaro White chicks telling no, no, no, no I'll tell you go to fucking go to western and fountain bro and that one in the corner. He's been there for years Western and found right there right in the corner. I know exactly what it is that taco truck is good, bro I'm telling you right now. I know exactly what it is. This is big bro, you know, what can I breathe? I get that kind of salad burrito with the works, bro. I mean Avocado, you know Salsa, you can take it out of salsa. I put a little bit of everything in there. What kind of are you green or red?

I'm a green guy, but but but but on but on that one you want to get that the top of the pico de aio Forget about it. Well, you're gonna dig it. I'm telling you right now. I'm telling you get stuck there, bro I got set there for about a year and a half me my lady. Where's this western western and fountain, right? Yeah, we're gonna go no you're gonna dig it in the tacos But get the burrito bro kind of salad with the works forget about it done I was doing a podcast yesterday in the park and a Mexican lady just came in with a stick of cotton candy And we had we had to get it. It was a dollar How great is that?

Have you got have you tried to fat fat cells yet? You gotta go to fat cells or not Fountain and hyaline. I know exactly what it is right right there, bro You live right down there. I live a few bucks from there. You didn't let me know when you go down there And then I'm gonna go treat you you guys when you guys want to go down there. Let me know when you go down I'll go by you guys. What do you get the fat one Ethel? What is it? I don't know. It's a you everything. There's there. They'll have that the fat Joey the fat Emilio

Everything's always the fat before the What's the fat Emilio? No, there's not no fat. I'm just saying they I'm just giving an example What's the one you the fat Ramona the fat whatever, you know the fat Lee whatever it is just like the fat that and You gotta have the motherfucking shake, bro. You can't even swallow that fucking shake No, dude, forget about it. It's not even a shake that you would that you would you're hearing this, bro You hear my friend owns it as well. You know what I'm saying? So check it out. It's not even You can't even suck it out of the straw. It's a fat fucking straw. You gotta eat that motherfucker with a little spoon Okay, no you do when you see the shake, bro

It takes a while to make because it's it's like it's like art But they're all their Sandwiches have like french fries and chicken, right? No, no, no, no, no. See see what happens is like they had the barbecue like the fat barbecue It'll be like Like when you have a barbecue you have meat, right and a barbecue you have potato cheese barbecue But they have the side to side the fucking sandwich, bro You did with it

Now you potato salad, you know, you would have in the barbecue to have all this potato salad Well, all that shit goes inside the sandwich. That's how you eat it That's how it goes over there, bro This fat cells that you're gonna put on some way. They don't fuck around over there, bro Fat cells used to be a yogurt shop out of another area Japanese family And I used to go over there all the fucking time with my wife in 2009 2008

And I went to an audition down and I drove and I saw fat cells and red band wife said Listen, don't let me explain something to you If you're gonna put fries on my sandwich, they gotta be exceptional fries Those mcdonald fries don't do dick for me on my sandwich now You go to new york all the time next time you go to new york Okay, you get yourself. I wouldn't even tell you this you get yourself a drive And you say look I want to go to west new york, new jersey To a place called dosen manos all they do said manos

All they do is cuban steak sandwiches, but they put french fries that are cooked in cuban steak juice Into the sandwich And that's all they do with cuban which milkshakes white hour, you know Mamey One hour all those milkshakes. They sell those cuban sodas and that's it They make 8 000 of those cuban steak sandwiches a day, but the french fries are cooked in that fucking steak juice

Yes, they are that's how you do it. Any fucking moron could put a french fry How many times I gotta talk to you people about this? And any fucking moron could put french fries on a sandwich big fucking deal You did me a favor wait till burger king wait till mcdonald's put french fries in the big mac These white people don't know what they're gonna do a couple french fries in your big mac, but that's not it Here's the sit like I've been pushing this plate for years. You ready for this brother? This is when I was lifting weights and in the daytime and I've got my buddies do a couple bumps and we drank and go to the city We go to the berkshire diner

And the guy was a chef at a half. I mean it was a neighborhood diner. You always got air in your food There was always blood in the bathroom You know what I ain't there was blood on the counter Finging nails, but you didn't give a fuck because the food was acceptable So he would take a steak and cut it you only then got the open steak sandwich This is how you do it. See if you get an open steak sandwich, he's fucking idiots don't know what they don't What you do is you get the meat you cut it up thin and you fry it all together with the onions And then you take that fucking juice at that steak you take toast the white wonder bread

You take toast you toast it you take it out and you put a little butter on it and then you put that meat On top of that toast so the oil from the toast Goes into that fucking from the oil from the steak goes into that motherfucking toast. You understand me? Then you throw some steak fries on top of that not those skinny fries with the hives Some steak fries mother fucking you put the rest of the steak on top of that So the juice or if you go on the good jersey side, they put mozzarella cheese And gravy on the french fries and the steak fries. That's the sleep I'm doing right there Anybody can give you french fries put mozzarella and gravy on those motherfuckers. You know what I'm saying

Put some mozzarella on that mother fuck that shit I'm going to call the island pretty soon. So i'm going to for that. I'm going to look up the manager No, that place that what that isn't isn't uh, little cubaville. What's left of little cubaville Well, you've been a you've been a you've been a man here, right, bro. Okay, 20,000 times That's rosemary. That's the best place I have breakfast lunch and then I'm told lead that a thousand times You gotta go. It's the car. Let's have never been 11th in college lea No, bro Lea another level lea another level like it's worth getting paul in ticket

That's where you go even just the bread before you get your food. Just the bread right there just the bread And how cheap is it and then then you dip you dip that bread bro. You dip that motherfucking bread Lea you go with somewhere paul. I said no bad bmb morning new you three times a day four days That's right. I wouldn't go anywhere else Because you just the you're just a cuban chicken soup With the bones and the fucking eyeballs I think I've had every pain in the damn place every place the boliche. They're fucking everything Everything for the sagua. That's it. What is the thing they have at uh, the place in Encino like the lemon chicken or whatever

They got it 82 times better. What is that called boy? You're ugly. You're boy. You're The cubanito brother the sandwich is always the same pork, you know, if you're in miami, there's nothing like fucking for the sagua That's what you gotta go. People get pissed off when we talk about food Don't say enjoy what the fuck you bring a million when we wanted to hear about sons of anarchy Why are you talking about fucking food for his shit? He's a human being. That's right. We fucking eat I'm a I'm a I'm a food person bro. Just I'm always gotta watch my damn weight all the time. That's what I'm saying That's why I can't go to big cells Fat cells if I can't go to you know, yeah, but you know, bro is like a strong friend fries and shit exactly

You can't do that shit Me and my wife went we were starving the other day and we were like, listen, let's just go see the fucking max Max the jew over here on the fucking riverside and we split the pastrami sandwich was fucking I'm a I'm a langus type of motherfucker language mean alvarado By by lemurk park where you could buy a fake passport gun explosive Identity you can buy one of those you can buy a whole new life right there is a jewish deli I was just saying wow

Yeah, I love I love um, I enjoy my food brother. I really do. I just like good taste and stuff But I'm always gonna watch myself. You got no bro after 28 the party's over One day you put on 40 pounds and then you go, you know what I'll lose it all of a sudden. You're like, wait a second This is you can lose five then you can't eat. You know i'm talking about it's it's tough It's a tough fucking battle. You just said you got back from uh, new mexico now, bro. You're always fucking working They love you. What you know, you you're a great story. What have you been working on lately? I just finished working on um on the show called the night shift, which is a great great show It's like a er back in the day, you know, and uh

I gotta play a great character man. It's really I was really fortunate to get this row I get to go through all my emotions in this episode, you know Crying going psycho being mean and a little bit of everything So I'll be public telling you when it comes on bro because I want to be sure people will see that Netflix No, it's on it's on channel four MBC and I finished the four other four other films You have six things. I was I obviously a little there. I am db. Thanks You went you have six things like either in pre-production or all the way through

Yeah, man, it's been a blessing, you know and then and again It goes back to son of anarchy because all that's been coming because the sons of anarchy, you know And then I got two other series i'm working on right now, which I started in two weeks. Um Z nation, uh, you know the zombie show on friday night I'm sci-fi and then I got called back again and go do that show with uh, Ron prom and you know Played clay on sons of anarchy. It's called hand of god. If you haven't seen it in samsung It's just a great series, bro. That's over the sun or something like that Yeah, it's really really good man. Ron. He's he's good at it. He's good. Ron's really good

He's been around for a long time man. It's nice to see if these guys are getting shows There's so many different avenues now for shows and These guys that were like two or three billing now the number one billing. There's a couple shows. Hey, man You never fucking know. Exactly. I was I'm also working on another thing right now. I can't say the name right now But I got you in mind for joy and we talked about you with the people already with uh, I can't say the names you know, but um And they're they're they're they're they so they have to of course have to look up joy, you know They're gonna go eat the guy you see long as you already are remember this guy

I go bro, that's the guy, you know, this is my And uh, and so we written that we written we have rewritten a lot of stuff To fit who you are and uh, and this even made the fucking film even more funnier And like I said, it gets closer. We're gonna you're gonna you're gonna trip out, bro So fucking fun. Yeah, shit, man, you know I fucking love it, man. I miss working as much as I used to it's not as It breaks up for me a long time ago broke up the comedy but not me It took the pressure off comedy a little bit. You know what I'm saying?

On the road or you yet? I liked it with somebody called and said hey, we need you for fucking three weeks Yeah, and you got a cancel two weeks that lets motherfuckers know you're on double blasts Exactly, you know what I'm saying? You can't be yeah, you're working a couple different sides. That's always there's always there's always good, man Really good and I like I always you know, I always try to take care of my friends I always put in the work for my friends, you know, and the people have been good to me over the years And it's been a lot of people, you know, but then again some people just don't feel fit Or they don't have the chops for that what I need or what you know what they need you do what I'm saying

so I got my a you know my my my My my I would say my my starting lineup And but I'm always got I always got a good backup too You know say just because because I starting up if you have a starting lineup that starting lineup is pretty much Going to be busy as well. So they sometimes I don't got the time to do what you got planned for me You know, so but you always got a good backup, you know, but uh, yeah, man It's uh, we guys going to be an exciting year this year, man. It's really good. It's good. It's good for all of us, man, you know No, I'm excited you listen, man

I wish I worked on like I said on the camera side as much as you do But I'm having a good time doing stand-up to the main thing bro If you're having a having a good time Uh, somebody sent me a text of the day said hey man, just uh, let's win And I and I wrote him back and I said I said bro, just as long as you're having a good time You're always winning bro. You don't talking about the other day. Lee you and I spoke at seven in the morning And I said something to you I said It's a great day that we don't have to get in the truck right now. Oh, yeah, I said something to you remember. I said

you You know, sometimes you look at how hard you work. Yeah, but sometimes you really have to judge how hard you don't work Like you know, sometimes I you know, I'm very fortunate to walk mercy to school every morning my three year old my daughter with my wife and How fucking fortunate I I never really got to see it But like now being friends with people on facebook through the podcast These are people who like are working at oil fields and like instruction and I can never do that Ever like that would you be surprised what you could do lee, but if I had to I'm sure I could adapt

I've come home my hands bleeding bro, you know, uh, even though I was wanting to love digging ditches, bro You did what I'm saying, uh digging swimming pools, you know, you know, uh with my hands You know what I'm saying? I I mean We got it pretty damn good, bro. We got it good. You have no fucking, you know And I tell you what was that we said the uh morning lee at seven in the morning It was just it was just that it was at least Well, I'm getting on the truck right now

Che you know every morning I get up and Listen that fucking house is on autopilot in the morning. She makes over me A little sausages. I play with the baby If we were on autopilot, we'd be out of that house That kid would be up at 6 a.m. We'd be in showers. You know what I'm saying? You know how we got up. We got a different our family got up to everybody woke up music Everybody had my this would be 11 of us living in a two bedroom house. We went back to him So it was like a time table for everybody knew how

The importance of who had to be the shower first. You did what I'm saying, bro. It was like that So I know how that's it's great. You know, I have so many opportunities. I tell lee what we know What can't we do, bro? And we don't have to fucking dig a ditch and You know work overtime and I and I fucking love those people. I mean that was me. That was me for years And I ain't no fucking years. I did I worked at bars. I watched dishes. I was a prep cook I bartended I fucking cleaned the bar. I you know, stop it It was a big thing for me when I got a job that could sit down at I all I always had server or store jobs

I couldn't they never let you sit down So that was my big thing I remember when I always should be a mechanical engineer for a hostess case and I got in big trouble So I had to be I was on the run I had to lead the state and I was at the time when everybody's making $4 an hour I was making $13 an hour. So that was pretty good paycheck, you know, so now I'm on the fucking run I'm in fucking Texas running and then uh, and I have broken ribs and my face is all busted up and uh So the second night I'm my my my my my

Cousin goes I got you a job. It's cool. You just a good place to be at man And so I'm dude. I have broken ribs, but I have to go. I'm trying to make I gotta be my out of family I had to bring them over right So I remember that he worked at a fucking Denny's and uh, so they made me a To bus tables first fucking night. I'm not fucked up, right? So I tell these kids is young kid. I'm already a man with kids And uh, just so I just fucked up, right and then uh, so I go away. Give me a A towel so I can bust that table and the motherfucking he's a kid a high school kid

He's still going to school me. I'm trying to make a living to pay for my you know, take care of my kids And he throws his fucking towel at my face, bro It lands on my perfectly on my face and all the food starts coming down my face, right, bro You know, and I'm a mean guy at those day in those years So I grabbed the guy by this fucking neck and put his face right to the grill I go, won't you ever fucking just spend my fuck up burn your motherfucking face off And I got fired that night, bro

Yeah, I got fired up for my old cousin, bro. You know what I'm saying, but fucking how you disrespect the man I play I'm in those kind of places You know, you ever do a fucking young punk trying to just bring like that. I'm over here trying to try and do good, you know Oh my god, that guy probably still Fucking shit is fucking pants, bro, but still fuck you, you know, and I got fired, bro Sure, you get fucking fired. You can't do that. But it was my cousin He's when they gave me he's when they gave me the job, bro. You dig the manager. Yeah, man. He fired you. Yeah, he had to fire He had to fire

I know but I have food coming on my face, bro You should have told me how back on him and shit like that. I fucked up, man Every day I think about Jesus Christ the shit we used to do for a living Yeah, man, well I first moved I used to fucking I told Tommy used to the other day You know, I was telling Tommy used to the kid. We were talking about the losing the trailer You know, I used to fucking get up and go write your sons and sell cigars on the phone In the cigar craze and hollywood and everywhere The whole country was smoking cigars. I was selling cigars

And then years later started selling screws because the cigar business went under selling screws selling screws on the phone on Ivar between between hollywood boulevard and Whatever's on top of hollywood there by the by the pizzeria there was it was right there And I would park my car there after like I would leave the county store too And I would go to Ivar bro and sleep till 4 30 Get up go in there and drink coffee. They would always have donuts and shit. Is that right? Wow, I would go in there, bro and

I would sell screws because in the east coast they're getting up at seven Right, so they're going to work in the shop the people who are in charge of uh Or all the ordering are there at eight. So I would call them up Sell them but at the same time I was sending out my veils on facts To all the comedy clubs even though I didn't even know I didn't know the booker Even though I didn't know All I had was their facts number and I knew that the booker looked at the veils I would send the veils just when he would see who my name was

Do you follow me in those days? I sent out 200 veils every monday Knowing they weren't going to give me work But they were going to see my name and my veils are going to come up and maybe And maybe just maybe That day god they got their dick sucked and they saw my name and they go, let me give this kid a call He's faxed me 18 weeks in the room. Guess what? I started getting called So the people who were giving me work now all of a sudden called me and gave me work and these fucking people

Who had seen my faxes for 20 fucking weeks Now started calling me going. Hey Would you go to the upper peninsula of michigan to start off working with it? Fuck. Yeah, I would One guy was a funny business out of michigan. I work for them now They're a great company. They've been around for 40 fucking years the old man Now the kids are running it for them And I'll never forget that again the guy who worked from great colo. I sent this guy a fax For a year

For a year. I sent him a fax And I was at the comedy store. I had already shot basketball You know, I wasn't looking at the headline or ripping a rumor part. I was looking at feed check And my girlfriend calls me one day. She goes. I'm going to michigan for the holidays. This is after I faxed this guy 100 fucking times And I started taking I go, you know what? Let me take a chance. Columbus did I picked up that fucking phone. I called funny business agency and I asked for more colo And they put this motherfucker on and he answered like a more colo Joey Diaz. Listen, I'm a feature act. I work at the comedy store. I shot the movie basic ball

I work for this guy that guy this guy that guy. I'm gonna bind My girlfriend's going to michigan and I work michigan all the time I want to know if you guys got any work And he goes, hey dog. I just had a fallout When do you get here? And I'm there like next Tuesday. He goes perfect. You go right to red then michigan and then So he goes you're picking up six nights Just because I picked up that phone and they took her and they took her of you

Yeah, he said, yeah, listen, I didn't make a million dollars. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah He gave me a hotel and I had a fight for every laugh I got, you know, I dig a dig a dig It wasn't a comedy club It was a fucking bar at a hotel with people who were drunk Who want to get their dick sucked by the store? This is something like that, you know Lee was happening over there. Can't suck to look at this shape of your time You look like fucking that the warm dough, but what happened to your eyeballs? I'm good. I'm just all right. You're good here. Yeah, okay. Let's get Amelia out of here

Let's do these fucking sponsors and get this party started this shit Amelia, it was a pleasure to fucking enjoy. Thank you for having me. He's coming out and nothing. Yeah I have a few is equal when it's called the badsville, you know with robert nepper and a castle But young that young you're robert nepper remember our teabags from fucking prison break. Yeah, he's fucking great, bro You know saying with a bunch of young upcoming carry on actors, man Douglas spain producing and About three other projects coming out as well, but it's getting close to let you know what's going on joy Gives me a reason to come back. You dig what I'm saying, right?

And I did just I put out a new episode of life in neutral. So please listen to that It's a lot of fun. We were in a park That's right. You did the fucking podcast in the park. Let me talk to you about a little a little product we recently got And they're tremendous. It's called tracker smart cars smartphone smart homes Technology has made everything smart, but losing your stuff will Still make smart people feel really stupid. Okay Tracker makes losing things a thing of the past Track is a coin size device that locates midspace misplaced keys wallets bags

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Don't forget go to the tracker dot com Because if not, what are you gonna do? You're gonna sit there like a dunce Looking for what what are you gonna look for lee? Not the not the tracker. That's right And always on it dot com on the job Nobody's better than them. You understand me. Nobody Today I couldn't today. I had too much oxygen in digital No, I had too much. I couldn't breathe

I started taking them again now because I've been going to alberto's for a while and I could beef it up a little bit Today I took one of them And I lasted two five minute rounds and I had a wrestler with la velcro. That's a nightmare right there. That's 398 pounds He told me wait now Is it two five minute rounds It's not punching wrestlers. Yeah, yeah, jiu-jitsu. Yeah, it's fucking great. That's great, bro And I started tapping on a minute and a half It can't breathe. You know what? I got to go back to the doctor to get my nose

That's 10 minutes. So that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, there ain't no joke. So like I'm saying, you know, it gives you extra The extra oxygen on it does the quadricep mushroom So whether shroom tech sport shroom tech immune the hemp force protein Any of their great supplements you got to go read about them because l education I guarantee there's something there that'll help you Go to honor.com right now Go to after we get what you get go to the box and press in church. Boom chu rch And get this church church chu rch and get 10 off your first order. Guess what? It's delivered right to your door. I don't know if you guys listen to lee in the beginning

I know lee's little bots and sometimes enthusiasm is off the tracker.com right now I know his enthusiasm is off. I got something else. I want to talk to you about that. I in fact started doing With this with the 10 day and then now I do it on my own little by little before I work out Or after I work out because I was noticing before I go to jujitsu. I would stress myself out And I said I got to stop stressing myself. I would just stress out Because somebody's gonna get on top of me. I'm gonna be able to breathe. I'm gonna get a heart attack my heart Right, right, right. You know the nicest. I said, I'm just gonna go have fun. This is a game These guys are just learning. We're just learning on bars and shit like that for me

It's sweating out tomorrow. I'll do kettlebells and then Friday. I go to jujitsu and then sunday. I go to jujitsu I'm 53. I gotta take care of myself But to take care of yourself sometimes sometimes when I get up in the morning is Amelia I drink coffee and I don't do deck. I just sit there in the fucking mid-light And I just think with a notebook and that's where I get my best thoughts. Sometimes it's a good joke And maybe not all of them could be good But one thing that you gotta understand is uh Meditation really helps you know, let's be honest. Most of your problems start with your mind

Fear anger stress anxiety depression sleeplessness. That's what I was getting a lot of they begin into your head Between you and I I'm sorry. They could wreck your life But it doesn't have to be that way you can make a major difference in just 10 minutes a day This change comes through guided meditation with the new headspace app headspace and meditation made simple It's guided meditation as you listen to whenever you want wherever you want right on your phone computer or tablet Meditation is rooted in thousands of years of tradition with thousands of scientific studies that show its positive effects Like improving focus relationship Harmony decreasing anxiety and stress and basically it's controlling your breathing

That's it. It's sitting and controlling your emotions with your breathing Join over 4 million users already getting some headspace for free right now. Do me a favor Download the free headspace app and begin that take 10 program for 10 days of guided meditation at headspace.com Slash joey the headspace take 10 program is 100% free way to experience the benefits of meditation in your busy Modern life train your mind for a healthy and less stressed life Start your free trial today at headspace.com slash joey. That's headspace.com Slash joey take 10 minutes for 10 days and that's all you need and you're gonna feel better But you know what do me a favor it all starts with you

Go To headspace.com Slash joey, all right and start your free trial today And that's it headspace.com slash joey. I want to thank my main people at tracker My main people at honor and headspace And also my main man emilio revera From being back in the show. Thank you joy. You know, I'm always always looking for the kind of like talking to you and me man You know people love you to death. So I want you uh this week. I'm in biggest feel it's sold out

If you're slipping you're fucking crippling and at the end of the month 3 30 to 4 2 I'm at the brayer improv bitches That's it. Lisa. Yeah, look at the shape of you. What am I gonna do? How many stars you eat? I had four 125 so 500 not that bad. You're still 300 light. So I don't want to hear nothing What is it stars at the milligrams of marijuana of thc? He says little goomy bears. I tell him he's got to go to rehab So I don't know. He's I have a bad influence. I guess. I love you guys. Stay black. Thank you emilio See you next week. We might do a podcast friday. I don't know. We might do something mainly when I fuck around We might go to cut a belt class to get him and do something I have to get about class

Yeah, put the fucking music on so these people can go home in peace. Will you please? This is fucking beautiful Here we go. There's another hour in here. Oh my god Why are we talking about gothom? You Jewish leave that alone This show the church what's happening now was brought to you by a tracker never lose anything again Go to the tracker.com use code word church To get 40% off of your first tracker device. That's the tracker.com use code word church to get 40% off

So it's also brought to you by headspace Go to headspace.com slash joey and download their free headspace app to begin to take 10 program For 10 days for 10 days of guided meditation. That's headspace.com slash joey Hey Baby, baby, I'm gonna leave you I Said baby You know, I'm gonna leave you

I'm leave you and that's how much I Leave you and that's how much comes Leave you and that's how much comes Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, I want to leave you I ain't joking woman. I've got to ramble Oh, yeah Baby, baby I can hear it calling me the way it used to do

I can hear it calling me back Oh I can hear it calling me I can hear it calling me back I When I gotta go away from this place I gotta cut you Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, oh

Don't you hear it calling me Oh Woman Woman I know I know Feels good to have you back again. And I know that one day, baby We're gonna go walking through the park every day

I'm leaving you Oh Oh That's when it's gonna be Oh Oh You