Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #613 - Sean Carrigan

Episode Date: August 29, 2018

Sean Carrigan, comedian, former professional boxer, and actor seen  on television shows and in movies, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio.  This podcast is brought to you by: MyBookie.com -  Use code promo Church to get up to a 100% match on your first deposit up to $1,000.   FujiSports.com  - Use promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount on all the best jiu jitsu and martial arts gear.     Recorded live on 08/28/2018.
  

What great welcome to podcastville the church of what's happened now is brought to you by My bookie. That's right. It's that season again. You dirty bitches You've been sitting there fucking grinding at the teeth building your bankroll Ready to fucking rock, but you're like what am I gonna spend that on do I start preseason fuck? Yeah, you start preseason. Why because my bookies here that they care you remember It's not what you're betting. It's as important as who you're betting with That's why I always tell people to bet with my bookie. Why I only recommend the service to my listeners and to the church family That's been good to me. That's why I'm urging you to make your way to my bookie. You win. They pay

That's what it's all about right or wrong So join my bookie and we'll match your deposit dollar for dollar use promo code church CH you are CH to activate the offer right now. You play you win You get fucking paid visit my bookie online. That's my bookie My B. Oh, okay. I eat if you didn't watch Sesame Street growing up and don't forget to use promo church When you create your account to claim up to a thousand and free play number two You're gonna go to jujitsu. It's four months from the holidays. You're a fat fuck You didn't give a fuck about the fucking summer, but now you're like Jesus. I gotta do some of my body

You're gonna go to Fuji sports.com right cuz it's the best gear you can fucking get in the business Whether it's a superado the psycho point to the elemental listen. I'm a fat fuck They put they told they pull my sleeves nothing I go home the fucking geezer tip top my goo. Nobody's ripping you can't hang yourself with that You can even hang yourself with one of these fucking sleeves That's how tough these fucking is so go to Fuji sports.com right now Press in church and get 10% off anything a shin guard a mouthpiece. How about the church? Cut it out cocksuckers go to Fuji sports.com pressing church and get your party started kick this fucking mule Lee

Oh shit One of those weeks here on the church Ever since I saw that documentary on show time. I'm gonna stab a motherfucker now Oh Keep fucking turning motherfucker Church of what's happened now Sean Kerry get going on the Christ killer I'm fucking tremendous damn man. I would kill to be able to sing like that. You know what I mean

Yeah, like I said as actors comics, we all have like a secret thing Yeah, and that's what I want to be a museum, but I was snorting coke. I'm a musician I would have sold the guitar every two weeks. I would have to buy a new ukulele I would have to shut up with a gig with a banjo one week was the guitar You're not gonna believe what I got robbed. I didn't get robbed. You're pointed for a gram cucks. I got Sean Kerrigan, what's that pleasure to have you on the podcast. Hey, man. It's an honor to be on your podcast No, it's great to have you on you. Uh, you did something for me that I never told you I'm gonna tell you today what you did for me. Yeah chains the game for me. What come on, man

Okay, so I booked this movie named grudge match with a director who I had worked with before And the narrow and put a fucking Stallone and LL Cool J and this guy John Bernard It was just a great cast the lady ambassador And I've kept flown down to New Orleans and I go in there a day early and I go are they shooting today and they go Yeah, they're shooting and I go over and I watch the LL Cool J scenes with the narrow and it's a big hug at first Everybody's clapping hands and they do a couple rehearsals and everything is beautiful. I'm sitting there for now So you're just on the outside. You just sitting there. No one's talking to you. Not a word. Nobody's even saying boo to me

Nobody's talking to me and I watch the Take start to happen and LL Cool J goes into a scene and he's fucking Cut and then there's another scene. Let's do it again and LL Cool J and cut and I go, what the fuck is wrong with LL Cool J? You know, well it the same thing happened. So I had a Shoot a scene the next day one tiny scene. Like I was like scene number five and the shooting started at eight So I went down there about 12 8 and sat around and I watched I didn't say word. Nobody talked to me and up to the part They were setting up for that scene

And I'm shitting pickles Yeah, yeah, you're about to act with the narrow. Yeah, no warm-up with fucking an extra No warm-up with nobody no warm-up with nobody I really rather warmed up with anybody, but fucking they throw you into the cage Yeah, no, that's it man. Yeah. Yeah ambassador. Yeah, still anybody but and no one. Yeah, no one was like, hey Yeah, no, but you know by right. So the narrow comes over On his own and he goes you whatever whatever my character's name. I go, yeah, I get up And I shake his hand. He goes the very nice to meet you. Do you want to rehearse a couple times?

I go sure absolutely, you know, let me just take care of this and I'll come back and in that fucking minute I sit down and I'm like I Got in my five minutes. I could get up Everything comes to your mind negative like the reasons why you're not supposed to be here. They miscast you That they're looking for a black guy. This is just wrong You know, and all of a sudden I tap on the show and it's your buddy John John Burntell and he goes How you doing John? I'm friends with Sean

Keregan and he said that You're the real deal Like on stage. You're the real fucking deal And you know what man, he was like an angel like I'd looked at him and I knew I didn't know who the fuck he was I just knew that I had seen him before And you know for him just to say that Stand up dude. It gave me when the narrow came back It gave me a little fucking oomph like yeah, okay now I could deal with this

I still fucked up because I once that scene happened. I realized what was happened to LL Cool J Yeah, they say action And then it all comes up. Yeah Good fellas, you see taxi driver. Yeah, you see I mean the first two takes you just see all these movies He did and you're just like your whole body free Feel like I'm about to do a scene with the priest when we play the priest with fucking Sean Penn with one of the worst movies of all time 84 85 call man. What was that terrible movie? But he still did you know, he's still had so what you did for me

I remember coming back and bumping into you in the haha You know, but I never told you that that that was well a man, you know, dude Joey it's cuz it's true, man You know, I didn't say anything that wasn't true, you know, John John when I remember when when he called me He was like, hey, man. He's like, there's a there's a comedian You know community John's always like checking up on people man He's like, you know, John's one of those people like just figure out someone's like for real or whatever You know what I mean?

And just like an if they're cool and in he goes he called me. I was like, hey, man, this guy Joey Diaz. He's a comedian You know, I was like hell. Yeah, I know him dude. I said that dude is I just feel bragged about you. I was like, he's hilarious. He's hilarious. He's a great dude Like you were cuz you were always really cool whenever I saw you, you know, and so I just said I was like, yeah, man that guy's the best man and Yeah, he came right over. Yeah, I spent the whole day so with him and the narrow just sitting on a bench Well, you know how that goes. I'm like, I got this fucking guy behind me. Yeah, and I got the narrow now Oh cool Jane in front of me. This can't be real

Like this is like a fucking joke What was more nerve-wracking for you that or stand-up comedy in front of thousands or like what's what's scarier? Stand-up comedy still scares me when I go up in front of eight people or whether I go on from 300 And the church people I still get petrified the fear With the narrow and doing a scene with somebody Out of your realm like I did a scene with James Cobra What was that like man?

Just what do you think it's gonna be like yeah, but I wasn't as nervous Right as I was for dinner dinner. Oh fuck me. Yeah. Yeah, James Cobra fucked me up on the first take again But I didn't know what had fucked me up when I did the take with the narrow I knew what had fucked me up was just too many visuals Yeah, I saw Cape Fear Anything the narrow did popped up and I just froze and then he came over And and let me tell you man, I saw the movie that you know, I'm upset that that movie didn't do better than and Than it did, you know, and it's almost it's weird

It's like I don't know if they like promoted it right or marketed it right, you know But because I thought that movie was a fantastic move like here's that here's that I was great man And you were you were you were funny man. I was lucky But what fucks up about a movie like that as you expected the expectations, but here's the expectation But I keep forgetting the raging bulls a great movie the Academy Award winner, but I don't know if you got the memo It was 33 years ago Rocky Academy Award winner fucking one of the greatest stories of all time. I know man That's 24 and 17 that's 34 and 7 that's 41 fucking years ago

You know this year this at this this last month was the anniversary of enter the dragon. Yeah 45 years ago Lee People and I don't blame the youth. It's not their fault. Yeah, but see that's the thing man They should have advertised it like that They should have advertised it like look at these like fossils like are gonna like They're gonna go at it and you know, I mean they should advertise it like Because I thought I thought it was funny. I thought it was funny If you see you're an actor you're nothing you've been not when you were a kid. Did you want to be an actor? Yeah, really?

Yeah, man, you felt it's an early age for a very early age man. Yeah, you know grow up I grew up. I grew up in Miami, Florida and But my grandma's cool. Yeah. Yeah all the way up all the way up through high school. How is that? It was it was weird man Because I lived down there with my mom and and and I was a little I like I hit puberty real late What was that if you don't mind me? He was up in DC, Northern, Virginia I got like I got like a really I got like kind of a dysfunctional family man They but they're but they're cool man, and they're all cool. My Irish also. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and so Irish Catholic

Yeah, man, so I was I was living down in Miami and and You know I was I was little and so I just said, you know when I was when I was a teenager just said hey, man You know I think I'm gonna just gonna start wrestling and boxing and so I started wrestling and in high school and then I Started I started boxing I would go up and my dad was an ex-pro boxer and so he would train fighters and stuff So when I when I spent my summers up there I was always around boxing gyms and everything and and so I was always like, you know wanted it to

To box and then I just started competing at both of them and then Yeah, and then uh and then uh, you know I did pretty well once the state championships and then and then and then I went and I wrestled in college and I wrestled at George Mason University and and then I had the Had I had a bunch more amateur fights, too I was boxing and wrestling at the same time and so it's it's it's weird man It's weird to talk about all this stuff because you know a lot of this stuff that I did, you know Athletically and wrestling and boxing like I never I never

achieved my potential I think and I don't know if like if if uh If that's overthinking, you know being involved in a sport and everything, but I think every athlete You know unless they're like a champion Must always feel like they left a little something on the table and now let me ask you this Yeah, you were you fought pro for one year two years two years. What did you think? I? thought uh, I thought that You know the thing about fighting in the pros is You know especially boxing

It's about having having a good amateur career So that you can have a good manager that'll get you the right fights And that's how about all boxing starts out and so you're fighting a lot of guys in the pros that you know Aren't really up to your speed, but they kind of bring you along You know what I mean you fight guys that you're a little bit better a little bit better And then and then you start getting tested and then they started bringing in you know tougher guys and then and then and then you Climb the ranks that way and if you if you if you handle when you get tested, you know and by by guys really good You know you can have a career

But it's a very small percentage of people that make the big bucks that become the De La Hoya's the the Mayweathers The Bernard Hopkins, I mean, it's it's a very small percentage man And I knew that I was never gonna be one of those guys You know and I just did you find out how old were you when you found out at what level at what? you know I fought I fought in the national championships a couple times and in the amateurs and There was a guy there was a guy named Daven King and another guy named Stephen Cunningham and

Stephen Cunningham ended up being an IBF cruiserweight champion of the world. He was he was Probably him and Daven King these two guys man Daven King one of the junior worlds these two guys were the two toughest guys I ever fought and I'd say Stephen Cunningham was the the toughest because he dropped me in the second and I got up and I finished I finished the fight. He was the only guy to ever drop me in the amateurs only guy and and so he I

Got out of that fight. My dad would always be real hard on me because my dad was my trainer And so he'd always be real hard on me and he'd say hey You should have won that fight you know You didn't do the you didn't do the things and and and usually I could understand where he's coming from But when and when I fought Stephen Cunningham and he and my dad started to lighten into me I was like hey hey hey pop that that that dude that dude's gonna be a world champion They're like I'm there's nothing like I knew I knew at that moment I was like there's nothing I can do to beat that son of a bitch man. He is he was that tough and and

He did he ended up becoming an IBF cruiserweight champion just like I just like I predict him Now when you walked away from boxing, I will read the press for I was very torn because My dad told me I'd be driving a cab for the rest of my life because you know my dad was training me and You know we had built a I was 8 no as a pro You hadn't really fought that many that many tough guys, but But he was he was like, you know, so I was starting to build a little bit of a following in the DC area

you know, I get you know start putting butts in seats and And I came and told my dad I was like, all right. Well, I'm good I'm gonna I'm gonna call a quits while I'm ahead and I'm leaving I'm walking away with house money And so and he just he said, you know, I told him I was going to go be an actor And he told me I'd be driving a cab the rest of my life So you talked to him today. Oh, yeah I mean, so then so then fast forward a couple years later, you know, we were at a screening and And he was both sitting there getting ready to watch this movie

I'm in and he's sitting there and it was actually the movie I did with John and so we're sitting in this screening It was called Mary Mary and so we're sitting in the screening and Right before the credit right before the movie starts. I turn over and I turn to my dad. I go I go, hey I thought you'd be dead and gone before you saw me on the screen He's like you son of a bitch. You always have to remember everything. Don't you so if he had told me that he was like I'll be dead and gone before and whatever this is How man this ain't funny man Because listen, yeah, yeah, you know, we're talking about comedy before I told you how I got addicted to it now

I had grown up working out and lifting weights and all of a sudden Comedy had just taken over my life. I knew that it was the only thing I had No, there was no other hope. There was no other hope for me. Here. I am living on Josh Wolf's couch With you know eating 49 cents cheeseburgers from chilies. Hey, man. I know the feeling man Is what was it called chilies? No, what's the place to that? Wendy's Wendy's Wendy's had the 49 cents chili Cup of chili, right? I go into between the chili in the salad. You pick your pick. Yeah, man I'll eat that horse meat. Yeah, I would get that horse meat With the crackers and I get to a 49 cents Whopper, Jr. Hey, so well, I and yeah, that was the struggle

That was part of the fucking struggle, but I will tell you one thing. I Got left back In the seventh grade and it devastated me just devastated me because I knew I was smarter than that I got left back because I fell in love over a piece of pussy Felling love just stopped everything it stopped my world the smell of a girl's vagina stopped my world Fuck homework fuck karate. Fuck my mother fuck my stepfather. Fuck Santeria Fuck everybody fuck the church. I'm in love. Oh, man. I'm gonna marry this fucking girl I'm gonna run off with her and I got left back. I failed geography

I felt like fucking classes and I had to go to summer school and guess what I fucking failed summer school because I Couldn't get my mind off of dry humping it and I wasn't even fucking That's the sad thing sure and that's how much of a fucking moron I was I wasn't even banging this chick I was just dry humping. Yeah, I loved her. Yeah. Yeah, we were gonna run off to a Bon Jovi song Bon Jovi wasn't even around Bon Jovi was still finger-banging the chick and writing songs. I'm way And I it was such a devastation the fucking left back that I had to get something I already had the karate. I was good at karate I know how to go to tournaments and I can always get a second or first place in form

And I would get this qualified for kicking the guy in the face above the throat, you know Yeah, I just get carried away by bam fucking it could be sitting there Jesus Christ Yeah, you know, but something made me get into basketball. I mean something how old were you? I was maybe 12 Shit and I fucking got I'd always loved basketball and I just got into it and got it became my everything It was part of the machine if I wasn't doing homework. I started getting A's because I didn't tell my mother I got that back So I couldn't have my mother go to the school or even suspect holy shit So I had to make for you forge report cards

I would I would end to subletters for parent-teacher meetings and I just fucking it was horrible It was horrible. It was the biggest lie. I ever fucking put together in my life and But basketball was everything. Yeah, I would write coaches. I would Write the University of North Carolina any ACC team I liked I wrote the head coach and fucking got their workout And I did I lift the weights I did and I played against the best competition Hudson County. Yeah, and I was supposed to start freshman year, you know Like it was if you looked at all the grammar schools and everything I was at the forward and there was another guy and there was a center and there were two guards

And I got to my freshman year and I didn't play this coach just didn't Man, and it just fucking yeah, and then in practice. Yeah, I'd score like 90 in practice Like I would destroy the first team in practice rebound. I want your coach play. He just did not like me We've been people talk to him They threatened to move me up if he didn't play me. Yeah, he was like you ain't moving him up and you know what man? I got into drugs And I I pushed it off. I played from time to time with sophomore yet and go out man I never played again and it destroyed me till this day. I

Made up for it with the comedy. Yeah, but I wouldn't have lasted long knowing that I gave up I gave up at the age of 16 because yeah, I'm not gonna what Cuban is over six feet You know, I was just being honest with myself Give me a Cuban that's over six feet beside can say go Stephen bow was six one. You know I'm saying Cubans aren't meant to be fucking told. Yeah, Manolo You know, I just gave myself a bunch of excuses just as a cop out but till today I still talk to all those kids and they'll tell you sure dog when you used to rock you used to rock I live with that doubt today like now today. I'm like

That basket, but it made me not quit comedy. Yeah, well, thank God man Hey, look, you know my little brother my little brother was wrestling and caught in in high school And he was just a he was just a he was just a fuck up man He was he was just always in trouble and everything and he had the same thing with his wrestling coach His wrestling coaches and he was he was incredible He was he had the most single season wins as a freshman as a freshman in the in the whole school so For a freshman to have the most single season wins was just you know, he was it was very impressive and he just you got he got

He's right before the pot. I haven't farted for a while. I shouldn't know. Oh Man, did you a little one I had some scouts I know it's just if we do is blame on the coconut. Yeah, let's just say yeah So anyways, that was it man. My brother just got messed up man. That's it. I wasn't growing up in Miami That's just a nightmare for you. And then you know, man, I loved it man. I loved it You know Spanish people now now I get to even like even more because I was the only white I was the only white kid on my wrestling team is all it's all Cuban man All Cuban and a couple black guys, man

And you have when you're white and you grew up in Miami you have to work a little bit harder Yeah, I remember when I went to Miami my cousin was friends with a white guy Yeah, that was just tough because he had to be yeah, like he had no choice Yeah, I forgot I was being like 16 right getting out of a car with a skateboard and me being like a New Yorker going he's fucking nuts Because and I realized I go white kids in Miami got a double it up. It's like Yeah, they gotta suck good dick Because the competition level is high if you're a white chicken Miami and you ain't giving up titties that those big chicks

That will suck your dick in the eighth grade You know saying so when you're a white chicken Miami, you got to work double hard I ain't nobody gonna dance with your dog ain't nobody gonna fucking take it to the prom Because those little Cuban refugee chicks that left their grandfather in Cuba. They're dying to suck a dick On the movie theater with grandma in my day You had to fucking take the grandma to the movie theater with the check and you know the mother or the brother The gorilla brother or something to the movie theater Shit I used to go to Redberry baseball camp did you ever go to Redberry baseball camp in Miami? I didn't go to it

But yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's like a staple. Yeah It was it was part of my youth that I really don't talk about a lot. I used to spend my summers Where did you did you grow up in Miami? No, I grew up in Jersey, but I had a godfather who lived in the falls Yeah, he built the falls in the 60s. Yeah, my monkey jungle, right 130th and 100th Avenue He would he was a contractor, right and he would build neighborhood So he would build a house he'd move into it and then he'd build four houses that Duplicated that house and he would sell him. He'd take a note out from the bank and he would sell So I would spend my summers in the summers. I had to work. I went down there. Oh, yeah

I get down and get bit by red ants You don't know what life is till you pick up a twig and it's filled with red ants You got a run like a girl and put hot water on you or whatever they did Get the red ants off your Miami was a complete. Yeah, I was a city kid. Yeah, I know I don't know how long I'm asking if you're from Miami. You're obviously not man. You're from me. You were you from New Jersey? Yeah, New Jersey, New Jersey, New York from Cuba, but then Jersey grammar school In high school pretty much dude man, you know, man, I spent some time up in Jersey man

Jersey's cool, man my my my mom used to run the racetrack Atlantic City racetrack or yeah in Atlantic City, man and and she's a Yeah, she's so she's suspended summers up there and then she'd come down She's coming down to Florida now for the winter time She runs in the restaurants of the racetrack like Gulf Stream and then mom at park and I love Jersey, man Mom is parked. That's a good racetrack. Yeah, Jersey girls too, man. They like Jersey girls. Oh hell. Yeah, man They're cool, man. It's it's I love Jersey, man

That's crazy. I love it too. I have no problems at Jersey. I think it's like anywhere else now It's overcrowded the traffic, you know when Jersey has some beautiful parts I'm I will never be ashamed of growing up where I did. I think it made me Who the fuck I am it really did I really enjoyed coming up from Hudson County. I really did Till today, I get little fucking notes on Twitter from people and shit in Hudson County. I love it I fought in Newark, New Jersey my my six-pro fight was in Newark, New Jersey at the Robert Treat Hotel and And and this guy this guy knocked me down twice in the second round And then I came back and knocked him out in the third round, but it was it was

That was one of those moments where like I was like, you know what? I don't know if I need to box This is just it's too much, man and and and and so then I went to the dressing room and I was butting up my pants and all of a sudden I was like Wait a minute. What just what just happened like I had a like a moment where like, you know Like after a heavy night of drinking and you don't really remember like, you know You know what you did the night before all of a sudden then my corner man Charlie King was he goes He's like, what are you telling about man? I'm like, Charlie Just tell me what just happened then he like as he started telling me it all came back to me

And that's when I was new I knew that I Have a concussion And so it's like I probably had plenty of concussions man and Yeah, dude, that's why I got out of the sport of boxing man How long was the transition between boxing and acting did you go to an acting class right away? Did you go to an acting school? Did you move out here? Yeah? I went to New York for a little while I was working at the china club I was bouncing there man and for about six months man guys like

Jimmy Venetti and I Kirk McLean these guys were just legendary guys that ran and ran the you know Security at all these clubs man, and it was just it was just it was a fun time. What year's with me This was this was October 2000 to to January 2001 no no no October. I'm sorry August So it was like six months. It was six months. I was there man And so it was just man. It was just it was incredible man, and did you take acting classes in New York? Yeah, it was Yeah, it was great man. It was a I

Took some acting classes there But I was you know I was having no luck and I ran into Michael Rappaport at the china club, you know Michael Rappaport He's below the podcast get dude. I'm the biggest fan of next guy So he comes up so I see he's there and I and I walked up to him when I go. Hey, man. I go, uh, you're uh You made it as an actor like did you make it here in New York? Or did you make it in LA and he goes you want to do film and television? I was like, yeah He goes you need to move to LA and then I was like, all right a couple weeks later

packed up my truck and Made it out to LA man. What year was this? This is January 2001 and And so then I came out here man with a bunch of group of actors We started doing casting director workshops and stuff like that and Man, I didn't know my ass for my elbow man. I really didn't what kind of casting directors were you meeting with at the time? Do you remember? Oh god, uh, I I I think Marty Saida was one of them because I got a part. I got a part You know, I got it like an under five. It was my first my first role and so

I'm trying to remember some of the others. I can't I can't remember So I actually met with my my agent and he turned me down and then he didn't Resign me ten years later. He signed me ten years later. So it was I was very green man It was it was like a green. It was like I got it. No, I didn't know shit. Listen. I got my move to know shit Man, I moved here. I was in Seattle. Some guy comes up to me after a show and he goes you're perfect for a pilot. I Am shooting I swear to God sure, right? I'm a fucking I'm out on bail I'm living with a stripper. I'm fucking basic. Yeah, I mean, I didn't know what I was gonna do. I Mean, I didn't know what I was gonna do and it was December of

96 It was Thanksgiving of 96. That was the weekend. He went to visit his family And he just had that was the second year in a row. Somebody approached me over the Thanksgiving weekend That was from LA that was visiting family up there and saw me so the second time he came up to me this guy and he's like You know, you want to do this pilot? Let me look into it. Give me your contact info and I I didn't know what to think. I got it. No, what the thing you like. Hey, man. What are you selling bro?

He goes it's a CVS pilot and it's you be playing the Spanish bartender that You know, whatever. I don't remember Spanish bartender where they come from formation to like a snuggie bet Atomic type of guy, but very serious and they always have to work me over for information. Come on, Joey You know the information that type of shit And it was called Bronx County, right? They were looking that was perfect and they called and they called again And then I got a probation violation and they wanted to throw me in jail So I told the guy from CBS and he goes, let me fucking make some calls and They called the fucking judge and wrote a letter. It was crazy, dude, man

I fucking got out of Seattle like the guys like don't come back And they came down here. They wanted me to go to counseling classes for assault and I never went to the classes so they but I Got down here and I fucked up so bad on that pilot that I was like That's this is never gonna happen again. What a shame. Oh, dude, like what a shame. Yeah, what an embarrassment I am that I didn't know about acting classes Like before we started the podcast we're watching the Stevenson God movies and lethal weapon I still remember watching blind date. Oh my god with Bruce Willis man

Bruce Willis and Kim Bastercher and tell him my roommate When are you gonna call your camera buddy and tell him about me? Like I thought you just made calls Like I just thought like like my friend told me one time like I have a friend that works cameras and I like Yeah, he shot this movie. I didn't leave that guy alone for three years. We're gonna call your buddy talking about me I'm a fucking savage That's like sometimes you you'll be talking to like an aunt or somebody and they're like hey, so You know, we were we were watching that CSI the other night

And you know who we thought would be good on there Shawn would be good on that. Can you why don't you call them? Do what why don't you tell them? Yeah? Yeah, just just call somebody. I love when people say that. Yeah, dude You're like, come on man. Yeah, it doesn't work that way. So I didn't know I wish it worked like that I I didn't know what was going on at Sean Carrick and like I was right Sean Carrick and I watched a thousand movies And I had no idea about nothing and then I signed with this manager And he's like, yeah, stand up is great, but you're gonna have to go on auditions. I'm like, what are you talking about? That's never gonna happen again. I'm not going on auditions and he shot me around Right, and I came down to two agents. He sent me pictures like 35 agents and I was turned out by 33 of

And only two agents signed me this dude that's still around. I'm gonna say his name. He's still a bum He's still a bum. Oh, man, they still he wanted money to send out your envelopes and shit one of those type of people Oh, yeah, you have to pay me a hundred a month for postage and handling until you book something And these two beautiful black girls called the coloring book Wow, and you had to send out all your head shots with different colored paper And they were called the color right for a reason they specialized with kids and characters But she had me out two days later Like she was sending me out

Two days all the time, and I'm not shown carrying it. I'm going in there What's that mean, man? Not I'm going in there not even close Like just shaking them telling me thank you for coming in Like thank you for coming in and then finally I said, okay, I think I got to take an acting class Well, I took an acting class and he taught me the basics of scene study first Frank Magna and then I Said fuck this and the biggest class in town was Not Leslie Conn

But the other one Yvonne, Yvonne, Yvonne Chubba. Yeah, I went to Yvonne Chubba Oh, that's great man that guy really broke it down for me But while I was going to his class I was booking Yeah, like I had booked when I booked baseball. I didn't even know what the line was. I didn't know what action Cut Like I was coked up the night before I slept. I was the first scene up. Oh, and I still remember them going all right I don't know on your marks Like what do I get bend over the race?

And then there was no I couldn't roll I couldn't roll the skate like I was supposed to roll the skate and baseball when I go away I'm not on roller skates. I just may believe they hated me Like people are hiring me and just hating on me Like hating me. Do you understand what that's like and people at home never had that idea like hating me And once I went to acting class, I got a little bit more and then I took a cold reading workshop Do you think you think maybe you started respecting the craft more when she started studying it? Uh

They informed me of what was happening. Yeah, what was happening? I didn't know what was happening I don't have any fucking idea And you're sending me scripts and you know, I'm going in to read with fucking the actors movie My hand is shaking. I had no idea people think that you just step on the lot You know, I can't shake in Morocco's this all these levels of intimidation and man And it didn't and it doesn't stop man. It doesn't stop. It's just it's just in it's But my wife got me a workshop cold reading workshop with the guy who cast Godfather to Donnie Braskoff and a bunch of stuff sleepers

And he brought in this really helped me. He brought in the audition tapes Sleepers, oh, that's made us look through all the audition tapes of the people that auditioned Mm-hmm, and why we would pick those people And it gave me a different that's cool, man And that helped me. Yeah, who took that class of me. That was 2001 at UCLA Guess who I sat next to Brian Callan. Is that right man? I love the New Yorker Rogan and wow, he wasn't a class Talking to chicks, you know, the whole thing

Sit over here. It was me and him would surrounded by 92 fucking women And that helped me and I did the Christian Kaplan workshop God, he put me in the movie taxi To two weeks later. He called me goes coming audition for this. They had given it to Bobby Slayton already But he liked me better and he gave it to me and Bobby till this day would say he motherfucker He's still fucking taxi from me, but it took me Three years to really get my acting chops out. Yeah, but still man. You did it, you know You know how long did it take you to really get your acting chops up?

Well, what happened to me is I fell on my I fell on my goddamn face, man Like I did I did a movie. It was so bad They said they said Sean Kerrigan has a better chance of modeling leather jackets than ever being an actor Like that was to review There was some cold-blooded shit, man There's cold-blooded and so that's why like I was like I Was like man, I got it. I just wasn't ready I did a I did a I did a TV show called next action star back in 2004

and it would they thought it was gonna be like the next American Idol for actors and So they auditioned people all over the country and they got to They got to LA and they and they select 14 girls 14 guys And then you have screen tests each week, you know, and they eliminate more people eliminate people eliminate people until finally The people winners of each screen test for each week for ten ten weeks That person gets to star in his own action film the guy and the girl who win it And so me and a girl named Corinne van Richter group It's a mouthful

We run it and we we want it and then and then we got to star in our own TV movie out in Cleveland And we went and we shot it and I had it I had to take a fake name because the show hadn't come out yet and NBC thought it was gonna be huge So like I was walk I had an alias Sonny Briggs or Sonny Hopkins And then my character name was Sonny Briggs and the movie just sucked. It just they they called it bet your life They should have called it bet your career Who directed it? I mean that they do it like a right job everywhere, you know, man I wrote it and it look I don't want to I don't want to you know, dog any anybody that helped make it because I think that what they

Were working with was an actor. I Wasn't ready to star and I I wasn't ready to start an action my own action film I wasn't ready to carry a film, you know, you got to understand like You're gonna get like rewrite sometimes or like it's raining outside tomorrow. So now we can't we can't shoot the exterior We're gonna shoot this interior on page 62 learn, you know, you got those 10 pages, right? Like you have to like it's just I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready for that level and And you know, so then I just I you know, I I didn't work for a little while In TV and film probably about six years. It was you know

I didn't book a TV or film job in six years and and Then I just said fuck this man. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna go out like this I I started studying at Playhouse West. I start I just learned the craft of acting I went back in the beginning your beginning class Worked my way up to the events went through the whole program It's Meisner and and and so I did that and then and then I just started doing stand-up I was like, I gotta like I gotta be able to make fun of this this situation or I'm like

You know, I'm not gonna get working again and the next thing you know, man I started working. I started working as soon as I started doing stand-up comedy I started working. It's help you audition. It's a lot more. Yeah, man I you know, I just I think it just helped with a lot of things man. It was it was like just It helped me it helped me like talk about like I had a chip on my shoulder man for a long time You know, I was like this, you know X pro box for me and John Bernthal would go out and we get in all kinds of barfights And shit all the time. It's just like it was just a very weird life, man

I was in it was a very like it's just what a little bit of a frustration. Yeah, it's like a little anger Yeah, and when you show the yeah, man, you know when things don't go your way for a while Yeah, you become and there's a phase that you go. Yeah, man. It's a certain age Yeah, and I had failed at the movie that I this was my shot man my one shot You know, they said that because they said the show was gonna be like the next American island and it just bombed It just was terrible and they network was it on it was on NBC, man It was on NBC and and they thought it was gonna be What happened was they shot it like the real world. They didn't shoot it

They didn't shoot it like what people wanted to see which was the acting trained acting classes We took with Howard fine the stunt training Howard fine on Fairfax. Yeah, dude. Howard fine was our acting coach Yeah, the old guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, this dude the studio Howard fine studio And so I think that is is I think he's on Fairfax now. I'm not sure yeah Yeah, but he was on Melrose at some point and and that's when we like train But but he's a fan. He's a fun like fantastic acting teacher But but so that's where they didn't see get all that shit. They saw like people like arguing over Bullshit like real like yeah, man

People were like I thought we were gonna see the like next Next action star like what like all the stunt training and all the acting classes and all this which all is all stuff We did but they just what was the first place you got on stage at? And oh God What's the name of that that place in North Hollywood, man? Haha. No, no, no, no, no It's a restaurant. They used to have a 11 o'clock open mic I

Tell you restaurant. No, no, no, man. I can't I can't remember the name right now Liquid liquid liquid zoo and then I do liquid zoo and van eyes. That was it man liquid zoo And I told just terrible. Did you go by yourself? No, my my ex-wife went with me and so and so she saw it It was just terrible. It was just awful. What made you go back the second time Because I got a couple laughs on some gross shit that I said And then I just I just You know, I just I just I don't know man

I just I read Steve Martin's book. It said born standing up there It called one standing up good book and he talked about how like how many times he bombed and I say fuck man, you know, like I used to get my fucking ass kicked in boxing But I but but I got through it. It's an I got I got through the times when I sucked You know, I got through it and and so now it's like all right Well, I'm gonna get you know, you just get to where you know, you're just gonna hope hope to get better So it's so weird how when you just work at it is what I'm saying when you're an actor. Yeah and you add

Stand up to your repertoire Even if you don't do it professionally, you do it as an exercise. No, like I saw Amelia Rivera From sons of anarchy. Mm-hmm. I met him 20 years ago And he was acting but he said that something about stand up helped him audition Yeah, and years later at an audition after I had auditioned a hundred times and sucked dick on all of them. I learned How to take the Mitzi concept when you showcase for me, you got three minutes Right when I call you up and I go I'm putting your life's hands on three minutes. You're gonna hang up the phone and go

What the fuck Do I do in three fucking minutes? Wow? Well, it's the same amount of time and you go into an audition room. Yeah, yeah, it's true man So you got three minutes to make them to love you fall in love with you So I started taking that concept of stand up and bring like I went in for fucking movies that you would die after I did I Think by 2000 I got rid of The manager and the coloring book disbanded by themselves the one chicks husband cheated on a white chick

You know do that to a sister They just fell apart at the scene and I signed with The guy with here's the weirdest story in the world The manager I was with was a badass motherfucker He had grown up in Belly Hills went to Belly Hills High went to Syracuse with the whole crew and knew everybody And I never forget that we were all Sitting there when we were around the meeting one day and he goes listen I got to get you an agent. I can't keep sending you out like this rogue in those days managers weren't supposed to send you out

And really in 97 98. No, oh wow managers were not supposed to send you out Jewish managers didn't give a fuck They were trying to get the lights paid. So they didn't give a fuck Jeff was that manager Oh, but Jeff wasn't getting me out for co-stars Jeff was giving me nine page Oh, he was in white PD blue leads. Yeah, and I'm going in there It's Danny Trejo and another Mexican from fucking this to the night. I'm like You know The first ten auditions I went in I lost in the room just signing my name when I turn around

That's the guy from Goodfellas in the freezer. Yeah, that you know right there. That's that guy. That's this guy That's that guy. I would lose it. That's the auditions. He had me going in in the beginning So, how did you finally get over all that? Stand up, right? I did a storyteller show in the belly room one night and it came to me Wow, that when I go in front of an audition, I'm telling the story It's not just how are you good to see you slate? My name is Joey Diaz. Okay, let's read those two lines One of the first auditions I figured it out was the James Coburn one. I Figured out that it's not just one line

It's a line on paper that doesn't mean I'm gonna turn I my job is to turn that one line into three Yeah, and that's what I would do. I would give them a beginning a middle ending just like a stand-up set So no matter what that thing was I did opposite and I always won the scene. Wow I always had the last line. I don't give a fuck what you wrote bitch correct me in the room But when I walked in there, I bulldogged you I Learned how to blow dog the casting low and guess who I went that from a pitcher by the name of The rocket. Oh Louis Dion. No, the other fucking lunatic from Boston Red Sox that ended up in the Houston That was a bully. Oh

He was a Clemens Clemens Roger Clemens. If you ever watch Roger Clemens pitch. What do you mean? He was a bully? Oh, he was a big time. Oh, is he? Oh, but you didn't see it on TV. Oh, wow. You saw it live No shit, you saw it live. He beat you without throwing a pitch. Wow, man So now that's what you have to start doing when you go into an audition You have to beat them without saying like one time I walked into you if you see it today Every once in a while people go Joey. I just saw you on a thing. Were you an extra on that? What's that show? Oh, how I met your mother That are two and a half men two and a half men two and a half men two

Huh, but how I met your mother I went in there my pants ripped and I had no underwear on And I asked the cast member if she saw the Cuban egg roll and they just died And I'll never forget like they were dying so hard that I walked out and my agent called he goes go back and read Yeah, and then they put me on the set and I was the wrong dude, right? But I got to that level by starting to book one liners One liners light turned into fucking three. Yeah Like I became the fucking captain Kirk of the enterprise let them tell me to read it how it's read Read it how it's written. Okay, but I already got you. It's too late

It's like when you go to court and you just go, you know that Lee raped the chick one time I thought it's irrelevant scratch that from the jurors the jurors, please disregard that comment. It's too late You made the count. Yeah, you already hit it out of the park, bitch Sure, so I would make sure on the first read I hit it out of the park. Yeah, my style I remember going on ABC pilot one time and when I went I had it was about a guy who was white trash Who was fucking put in the neighborhood and he was He had like a Kmart swimming pool and he was watering it like what slippers on and whatever in his mind He came from the ghetto. This was like

Big-time living here a little Puerto Rican barbecue little little obaches Yeah, and he had a three hot dogs on there and he was this guy. He felt that he was a big shot. I Fucking put tidy white ease on I weighed 380 I put a men's a t-shirt like this and sweat pants When I walked in my plan was to walk in and pull my pants down and have the tidy white ease and blow my little water Oh, no, that's how you audition right? Yeah, you auditioned to be remembered You don't audition to book the part. Yeah, you auditioned to be where'd you learn that from Milton's Milton Kittseless? No, yes, that's how you learn that from a man, man

I learned it from Milton Kittseless and yeah, dude guy from the godfather to yeah You don't audition to book the role. Yeah, you auditioned to be remembered Yeah, so I walked in the room and the ladies were great that you made it Can you give us one minute to confer when they turned around? I dropped those sweat pants And I took this leg out and here I am I took my sneakers off and everything with my big red Flintstone feet I got a pet tidy white. Yeah, I took my shirt off and I had a gut and tits And I may believe I was watering the thing and I go look at me and they both all three of them turned around at once And I go live it like a fucking doctor

Done and the class they said put that on the tape. They died right there. They go. Just put that Put the camera say that one more time just like that without the fucking and I went oh look at me Living like a doctor Bam done. I walked out of there. I could have told everybody go home like go home the same for you You know the same go home the same for you. Yeah, I didn't I had too much class Yeah, but by the time I walked to the car for you Yeah, but the time I got to the car we get the call because I would I didn't go in there once I figured out You don't go in there to book the road. It's just like stand-up County. What happened to me the last six months

I was doing stand-up to please the audience, you know what since one of my fucking gorilla monkey It's gonna play a drum. I'm there to do what I do and whether you like it. That's your problem That's the problem with stand-up now. They're flipping it on you. We're starting to believe that I started to believe that I started stand-up to make you feel uncomfortable and to make you think and To let you know that what I'm telling you is the truth. I know that right those people in Thailand that thing that happened in Thailand He was gonna fuck those kids in the cave. I'm telling you I don't give a fuck what you think that it was a Christian was rating that it's been raining out a lot You don't see me going into no cave with 12 other motherfuckers. He was gonna fuck those little jab kids

There's no two ways about it, and I'm flattening everybody. No, I don't give a fuck what they tell you Nobody's gonna tell you that coach was saying dusky Junior He was studying the readings of saying dusky and shit said dusky read a book in prison This motherfucker took it 2.0 Take him to the basement. He took him to the fucking cave at least Fuck in the ass let you go home with a balloon No escape I'm fucking you to death, and I'm leaving you here for the crocodiles

But they fucked up with the bicycles nobody believes me Yeah, nobody believes me that that's what really happened, and that's what you have to let people know the bicycle when they leave They're like, I don't know Joey had a point about that shit. Why would he take him to a cave? So what it was raining you stand up door under a tree. Yeah, it's fucked up What stand up is and you watch the guys like Kenison and dice that were really pushing the envelope And you're like that's what I have to be doing. You know, it doesn't work for everybody I mean also man, like yeah, man, it's also like it's what what your what your flavor of comedy is man You know what I mean, like like like I love I like that's what I love people to push the fucking envelope

You have to I ain't got time. I'm 55 Dilly-dally, I don't give a fuck about Netflix HBO showtime. I'm looking to rip that fucking stage apart now I'm looking to leave smoke up there, and but I want to when I step off that I want the battlefield to look like fucking Like I shot everybody Like like Vegas like a battlefield like that's what you're supposed to leave them like people playing all over the place bleeding That's what comedy is. Yeah bombarding the fucking audience, and I lost that I lost that and it's the same thing when you go into an audition You know, I still remember a boat. I know what I'd say to you. So I got this guy Jeff Gatlin

He's got connections at fucking CAA He's got connections everywhere, but he goes dog There's an agent. I want you to meet You're not gonna like her But we're gonna take a meeting anyway because she's the best agent for you Right, and at that time if you went up Highland in the middle there where there's a parking lot. There used to be an old Building like you were scared when you parked in the underground You were really scared like the underground parking there. You were like, I don't know if I'm gonna make I used to sell point across the street from there

When I first got here, there was a job Telemarketing that you saw at point eight bucks an hour and you went in there and just called hand job places and said I got the latest Lucy loot tape ended up the ass and they would order and I quit after a week. It wasn't for me I went and sold some guards, but it was just a shitty neighborhood Highland and then Hollywood Yeah, it was man above above fucking Hollywood Boulevard after nine o'clock at night You better bring a weapon Jack walking into the 101 there right there. That used to be bad news Yeah, really bad that corner there with the subway and everything right there that turns into Franklin Yeah, they used to be in Highland with a building so I

Ask him where to meet him and he tells me meet me at that island and I go you want me to meet you with a fucking agent That's where their office is Like everybody's office is on Wilshire Some people's offices were on the lot you want me to go you're telling me that the agent you want me to go meet and it was Daniel agency No, shit, and they were on the fourth floor of the scariest When you press the elevator the elevator took forever. This is this is

This has to be 1999 2000 No, I met her a week before Christmas And the name was Nancy apt and she was from Chicago and the insight was on the street the word on the street was Yeah, you could go to this agency and that agency, but if you really want to work just ladies don't fucking stop And I can I mean she was like that. She was that lady without the cigarette I'm gonna help you today Fucking headshots all over a desk Jen martini Danny was in the back so doing commercials. I was a sudden bartender in a hurry

Danny was in the back doing commercials. It was a three-man operation Wow Operation that's crazy, man. So she came out Danny came out and said I don't need you for commercials I'm with son Barton and Ari cool. Yeah, and then she goes. I want to sign you. I go Let me talk to my manager. We left that building. Are you fucking kidding me dog? If you want to go out, that's the lady that's the lady combined with me and it was the truth You know, I found one of those notebooks about two years ago. That's when I was going on three TV shows per week and

Two feature films and I'm talking about name it. I could read damn. She was getting you out like that like that Wow This has to be 2000 to 2003 before the computer. Yeah, they would hand submit. Oh, it's a different time And there's a different time. I was guys and shit. I was good. Yeah, they have a Thomas guy to get around I have a headshot. You better have a headshot on it. I show without a headshot Every two weeks at forty nine dollars dog, they would call you and say we need more But you as an agent as a client, I would show up every week. I would alternate headshots Every week every Sunday. I would staple 50 more. Yeah, you had to cut the sheets eight

Headshot dude did it all man. Yeah, I'm fucking kidding. It was work jack. You didn't just fucking act You had a staple them perfectly I'd always go to King or King goes FedEx and and use the slider. Yeah, the slide the resume Well, they used to be a FedEx right on Sunset that first it was the misto chow Mr. Chow was across in the guitar center So he did all my resumes. He would slice them for me and I would staple them mr. Chow's printing Well, I lived in there the headshots were La Brea and Sunset behind Hoy's walk That was the headshot place. You were in there every three weeks and then seventy nine dollars

Did you was Ray the retouchers around then Ray the retoucher was there so people go retouch retouch this. Yeah, right I'm ugly. Nothing's gonna save this face Forget Ray the retoucher. That was a big thing back then. We love your headshots But you have a little blemish on your head. Yeah, well that gives me character I'm not giving Ray the retouch 80 bucks to retouch and then you look like a fucking like you died They put that fucking Funeral makeup on you on your headshot. You like a smile, but now fuck Ray the retoucher I was brutal with those people brutal

I used to tell them to use the headshots I got and then once we book a job then I'll get new headshot because they always give you a list Sure, you have to take a picture with them. You call the guy $300. No, no I got a Puerto Rican with a camera and for $29. He does fucking a hundred headshots 20 poses He even lets me shoot him at the end. You know I'm saying I do that you you're a carpenter There was agents that would say you got to come back with a picture of Lee as a baker She'll have me throw a picture. You're throwing a pizza up in the air. Come on, man In 97 when you went listen dog

They had first of all every year they have a new scam that you have to sign up for sure to help you Expedite your career. It costs you $69.95 a year something. There's always something and then at those days it was cast net Listen, you really want a movie Cast net Oh, it was cast net. Yeah, it was It was cast net I mean to become an actor in those days it cost you a lot of money Yeah, because you had to get the right headshots

They wanted a headshot for each thing they saw you at so if Sean Kerrigan came to me He would be the Irish priest. I want a headshot as you as a priest I want a headshot as you as a construction guy, right? I want a headshot as you as a boxer So they wanted all these headshots. Are you crazy people going broke in this town? They wanted 400 for four poses of you like, you know, what a kid Dude, what and what did what did all these people that had all these places do man? Where did they go? Like how like, you know, because it's like you're thinking to yourself. You're like These guys, I mean, where are they all doing digital now? Is that what's happening?

Everything is digital. They had to like lost all their all their shit. Okay, across the street from Ralph's There's a Chinese restaurant. There's a Russian market and down the block that whole corner at one time When I tell you that that whole corner, he had 10 people behind the counter You had a pick a number to go in that corner. It was to get headshot duplicate. So you went to La Brea Okay, so first you had to go get a headshot Lee. Yeah, okay 300 Then you had to take the sheet to your agent and they had to approve it Yeah, they wanted so they want out of the 36 pictures

They want 22 at five hours a piece, right to put into like postcards to put into postcards So then you got to bring those back. Yeah, this was the process Yeah, then you had to bring them back Table and then again, they go right give me that one that one that one that's another 22 a piece Yeah, and you had to come back the next day with those three and then they go Okay, go get me a hundred of these and a hundred of these at 79 95 a piece. So you went down there and you ordered your fucking You ordered your fucking thing and then from there after you picked up the hundred head shots Oh, no, no, no, no after you picked up the regular shots. Yeah, you took them to the corner of

I don't know the street with the one before fucking Rouse and there he made you a hundred copies So all this money already then you had to get the hundred copies and you had to get remember you had to get commercial headshots and Theatrical headshots. Yeah, that's right. You you said you had to double down man This is crazy what they did to you. Yeah, I used to tell them after a year. I told them to suck my dick I don't give a fuck send that fucking headshot out send that out. I don't give a fuck what it looks like Yeah, then they all wanted it real. Yeah, I still remember Being shooting analyze that and it was such a great scene with me and Anthony them probably in the beginning

That I tried to get the scene the movie wasn't getting released till December So you try to get the scene before the movie came out. Yeah, and they wouldn't give it They wouldn't give it. They wouldn't give it. I got a call one day from a friend of mine He goes you want your scene I got it Cuz I got your scene come over to my house So I went to his house And he had the scene but it was backwards Because when you steal it off the computer it comes back backwards

So how to take the scene to these guys come on man you found guys to fix this dog There's people Rob Paramount people on a daily basis man. That's a business. Yeah. Yeah, that's a business Yeah, absolutely. Oh, yeah, they stole the prelims and they released them all those Africans in New York that saw you the movies Yeah, some of them sit in a movie theater and tape it but there's some guys are on the up and up Sure, they know somebody they pay 10,000 and they get they make 10,000 copies and they sell them for five hours a piece $50,000 $40,000 profit and those movies go from computer to computer So these guys would steal more to computers. This guy called me one. I didn't ask him to do that He was like his guy. He was like an army guy that knew how to steal like the army taught him how to steal

Yeah, he was I got your scene, but you have to flip it So instead of me being in the movie. I was on the left-hand side Now I was in the right-hand side. It was a nightmare Then I took it to these guys on Mel right now. I'm gonna bring in the back back Like that's what these guys did sure like they had a vault back there and they flipped it and they gave it to me But they're like, listen if you send it out you can paramount sees it You're gonna go to jail. Oh, he said they told me that Just wait the three months. Yeah, you know, there was just so many obstacles

So wait a second. So so you didn't send it out. No, I threw it away. I was like, I only wanted in my house Oh, yeah, I'll wait till December ain't gonna change my life that much in my mind Did they tell you that after you paid him? What do you mean? Like no, they told me even before they were like, it's not worth Nobody asked me for money like this was all in the up and up This was way before the pocket this was just a guy I was complaining to but one night About the scene and he's like, let me talk to some guy and next you know, he's like this guy wants to talk to you got the scene for you Yeah, you know, it's weird man. You don't think about how much piracy there is out there, man, but it's like people It's dude, it's like you think about that man

It's like people I got a buddy of mine who he'll say hey, man Once you come over and and watch this movie, I'm like that movies on the theaters. He's like, yeah, no, no I got it. I'm like fuck Like how are you? He always has no I'm like, I'm like, man, you gotta stop stealing all these movies, man. You think he stole them? No, so I don't know who's In that that movie that gives you those previews and they say shit on them Yeah, they'll say shit on them that you're not supposed to see like they'll keep coming up saying property of right Well, now they have boxes and it's because it's all online

They have boxes they sell on Amazon that you can buy that you get everything you get all free TV free sports free paper views Yeah, they call it's called Cody. I mean they're good there the government's trying They shut it down every once in a while, but they just build it back up. So what how long did it take you? Mm-hmm to act full-time as a full-time like right now You're how long have you been a full-time actor just paying the bills with acne for probably about 12 years really full time maybe 10 year 10 10 years Yeah, making it probably 12 probably 12. Maybe yeah, I mean sometimes better than others, you know But I started working I started working again and in commercials commercials and so

You know, I booked a couple commercials from For like I booked that Geico commercial, you know the one where he goes through the airport Yeah, and then the guy on the sign is me and so I made just you know I paid the bills with that, you know all year pretty much and so I would I would book little like Commercials here and there and you know make it, you know, I've shot a lot of commercials. So so then I started I'd started Doing stand-up and once I started doing stand-up then it just like I started working TV and film and and And that was about those. Yeah, are you on the soap opera for a while? I was on the soap opera. I was on the Young the Russes for three and a half years

Christ, yeah started out four episodes and then I told him I said, uh, You know, you know, I just I just did I did the best I did I told myself that This is an opportunity for these people to bring you back So just try to make something added out of these four episodes and make them want to keep seeing you man How long were you acting before you got these four episodes? Oh This happened it I was like, I guess I've been acting about 12 12 years

Yeah, yeah Yeah, 12 years. How was the transition? I think that was one of them for me I was You know after the longest you had my confidence with up with acting right after 17 weeks of work Yeah, all those people you grow a level. Yeah, I grew a level from the auditions I got tough the longest sure I grew me a level, you know the directors you work with me Well, you learn as you go man, you learn as you never prepared for anything. No, no and one day. This is what happened I did that. You know that she's a

Julini what's her name Carla? Julini she had a TV show for a while on ABC She did the movie American gangster. She played at the Leeds wife Okay, Carla Gugili. She's been around for a long time. Check out American gangster with Denzel. Yeah, who played the white guy's wife She had a TV show. Yeah, and it taped in at the strip club on Lancashire that episode I played a bouncer. I Was a Daniel Ha for a couple years. Yeah, man, then Nancy left well Nancy flipped and left And in those days, you know, I was doing coke and I Do the timing schedules of the fucking checks you do a TV show dirty, you know, they always tell you TV

10 days movies or commercials dirty days. What's it in college? Jiu-Jitsu, Jiu-Jitsu, I know yeah, yeah, college. Good. Take two waters So I was with Daniel off and great guys. Nothing. I'm not saying anything bad about them But their check process was a little slow for me They would take too long to pay me and hold the checks. I don't have time for that shit Oh, yeah, I owe you a commission. I pay you a commission when you got my money. Don't fuck around my money Well, they're great now, man. No, no, no, that's solid. I was with him for three. I was with Dave Yeah, and your agent they were great

It was funny how I had to call them one day and go where's my money and they're like we sent it I don't know you didn't that we never get then they called back and said we never got the check And the production company said we'll send it at three so I called Danny. I go listen if you don't have my money I'm going over there If you don't have my money, you're going out the fucking window and when I got over there There was a check on the door with my paperwork all my headshots Yeah, we don't want to represent, you know more the door was locked. I took my check Yeah, whoa, and then do you know that get the hell out of here. Yeah, that was probably

Right before because they got me spider-man too They got me a bunch of shit. She was she I was with them for four years Yeah, I left them right before maybe the longest yard and then maybe like in 2012 I had to take my cat to the vet and do it there was Danny. No shit. He goes. How you doing? How you doing Danny? I fucked up that day. I'm sorry. He goes, ah, things happen He goes, are you with I got him with some pieces? He goes give me call later come back And that was it. That was it. I was at the play three years. Oh man, that's cool They're good people Dave my guy is in New York now, right?

Dave is in New York, and then you have the really good black dude. Kevin Turner, man Kevin Turner Kevin Turner the most monotone human you'll ever meet. Yeah, he was he's no emotion. Yeah, dude He's a machine. He's he's he's actually he's a computer. He uh It's like my first meeting with him. I was like man that that shit went terrible man He just like shows no, it's like poker face. Where'd you come from before you sign with Daniel? I do dog. I just had a manager. I had no agent. I did a workshop I did an agent workshop and I told you I wasn't working on TV and film for like six years so so I started taking these these casting director workshops and

and I took an agent workshop and next thing you know He was there and saw me do a monologue called me in his office and then like I was like Who is this man like he is he's like shows no emotion no motion I was like well, well, that's that's done and the next thing you know and call me back probably in again sign me So and the rest has been history man. Now. I just you know, I just tease him about how awkward he is all the time He's a good dude. He's a good dude. I'm finally a dude man. I'm happy you got to get on the show and talk a little bit I gotta tell you one of those guys in LA every time I see you put a smile on my face

Because there's no bullshit in you like they don't well. Thanks, man. You're very yeah, and you travel a lot doing stand-up Good, you know a good amount. I mean, I'm not really getting out on the road too much right now I'm on them. I'm on it the ha ha tonight or and I'm sorry I'm at the ha ha Friday night and Saturday and I'm Friday on the 11 o'clock show and then Saturday on the 830 845 show so but I like I get out like I Get out a little bit. I've done Canada a couple times. I headlined up at Yuck Yuck's in Toronto. They So I did that for a weekend and then I did I did the Yuck Yuck's up in Vancouver And so like I'll do like, you know, I get out a little bit

I headlined in Montana. I did a you know weekend in Montana. So LA is a little tough. You know, man It's just it's tough. Yeah, man to break into this Stand-up is tougher than it's ever been. Yeah Right now in LA. Yeah, people have no idea How hard it is to move Vertically, yeah, well, you know, I think I'm lucky in the fact that you know, the ha ha comedy club, man They take good care of me, man. They they they you know, they give me tons of spots and And they've really shown me some love over there

And so that you know, I've grown a lot because of that club, you know, and not an easy club Yeah, no, it's not and and easy club and uh, and then I'm you know, I'm getting spots at the comedy store occasionally now, you know And so, you know, they'll show me a little bit of love. So we'll see what's up, man, you know, you have a positive attitude You know, you're always smiling. There's never a negative word out of you. Like I said every time I see you I kind of giggle because you just Have a very Genocide war attitude. That's really You know, I I've been taking my daughter to this place

They do the little dragons like from four to five The big girls coming in like I told you I don't even I don't like this area Because the apple doesn't fall far from the tree if the parents are a bunch of fake fucks The kids gonna be like, you know, so sure Sydney yes, they watching this fucking martial arts class and this girl comes in and the other girl stops what she's doing And looks at her and she goes I've missed you so much. It was right out of a fucking coffee shop And I go this is why I don't want to raise my daughter here because This you know, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree the parents are fucking fake fucks. Oh, yeah, man

I can't imagine what the kids are like, but it's guys like you There's a couple of us in this town that still remain True to who we are. We don't give a fuck about premiers. I don't give a fuck about parties I don't give a fuck who's in the room. You could suck my dick. Oh, I give a fuck I wiped my ass with your white privilege You know I'm saying if if let it skin it had no white privilege and the almond brothers who the fuck are you? I'm white privilege. Yeah, exactly man. Exactly. You think you are to have white privilege whatever fuck so this area just breeds this

Fakeness and you don't have it so and then you're in the business where you have to have it to succeed You and John both these now have this very like I said John made me feel On a set of stars. Yeah alone look at himself. Good dude, man. You know, yeah, hopefully Listen, let me tell you man John Bernthal is is one of my best friends in the world and me and that guy I've been through a lot of shit together and You know like a lot of a lot of situations man, like, you know All kinds of different situations and he is he is always just been he and he's like that with all his friends Man, it's just a great dude man. Just on the level. You know where you stand with him

He was talking to me about comedy. Yeah, he's interested in comedy. Yeah, he's very interested in doing comedic roles I think his agent suggested Maybe you should try comedic roles and I was watching him in Sicario a couple weeks ago And he was great in Sicario. He tries to fuck the skinny chick and he tries to kill her And then but he shall put his finger on this fucking ear and licks it and all this shit to him. It's a great movie Yeah, but I'm looking at him. I'm like this guy's got comedy chops He just doesn't know it. He hasn't taken the plunge yet. Well, he was on a sitcom He was on that show the class it was a sitcom and and that I love that show

But now he just gets like movies. Yeah, he's getting I mean, dude, he's playing you know, he's he's He's playing the Punisher, you know, it's just one of the most badass roles there are man I mean, and he's just killing it. So He's doing he's doing all right right now, but it's you know, I just look man This is a tough business and if you can be cool with people along the way, you know, and Just just just be cool man. Just be fucking cool man. Just like just just do your shit. Take care of yourself Push yourself in the ways that you need to you know, but don't be fucking upset about anything else, you know Just just concentrate on your shit and be cool with everybody. That's it man. It's crazy the thoughts you get

When you're doing this shit now the negativity that comes in your mind and the people are the negative that come in your mind There's some people the man that don't want other people Yeah, and it kills him Fucking kills him and I cheer for people to do well like I was watching Dean Delray last night Oh, it's great man. I taped it and then I just said who the mind tape it. I gotta watch it Yeah, I watched Bert and Bert was great. Yeah, Mark Marin was great Yep, but Dean brought a tea in the Mayan. Wow because that's one of my boys Yeah, I watch TV and I see you in a movie. I go. Yeah, Jesus Christ. That's one of my boys

That's part of the success story. If you don't feel that way about the people around you You're not gonna succeed if you're not genuinely happy if I can't look you in the face Go fuck Yeah, fuck not fuck. I wish I got that. No, not fuck. How did he get that? Not fuck. Yeah, he blow Yeah Because I know it's one step up we all get up. Yeah, we all got up. It's Donnie Brasco We all get up if you get up I get up Lee gets up as a comic. Yeah, Tiffany Haddish got up. That means we all step up one

Ralphie died Tiffany Haddish got up and Louis CK jerked off. Yeah, so we all moved up three fucking spots That's what happens. You move up and if you stay on that rotating line if you stay on that line You just move up. Yeah, and it's just a matter of time before you're there. Yeah, you're in that man You're on Disneyland ride. It's clicking click click click click, and that's all it is. That's all it is That's all it is when people understand that you genuinely cheer for your peers from your bottom of your heart You will grow so fucking much You will grow so much that you know when you see something like Rogan who was made stars on that podcast How much has he grown since that now because he helped other people grow when you when you were genuinely

Yeah, man Healthy about your friends. I want Lee to do stand up But I want him to do it the right way so nobody ever takes anything from him Right the same way like people come to me and go well, you got this because of road No, I didn't you forget that was me and spider-man two bitch 14 days You you get everything that you fucking work for and you put the work in and and and and just be fucking just be kind of People that are around you when when you when you're coming up because there's an old saying in Hollywood Man, you see the same people the way up seem to see the same people going down

Exactly fucking Ralph Crandon said that on the honeymoon is in 1951 when they were doing that episode about acting the string of Palompanies Sean it was a pleasure having you Podcast the bottom where can people find you at this week? I'll be the haha. No, no, Sean Kerrigan Yeah Yeah, Sean Sean Kerrigan calm on Instagram is the real Sean Kerrigan and On Twitter at Sean Kerrigan. I love you brother. So hey man, this has been it's been it's been pretty cool, man Yeah, no, I always want to get Charlie. Just was the right time. I ain't gonna lie man. I was pretty nervous

I was pretty nervous, you know, man, so no reason to be nervous. Yeah Hey, hey, this is this is cool, man. I'm a Christ killer now. Are you a legend, brother? He makes you he makes you nervous. Don't worry, buddy. He makes everybody nervous. Yeah, don't forget I'm gonna be in Philly at the Parks Casino September 14th and the following night at DC at the 930 Club with my mother fuck a Matt Pultron And I want to thank my bookie, you know, ever since I started this podcast people want to know advice Joey who's gonna win who's I don't fucking know if I knew who's gonna win You think I'd be doing this fucking podcast? I'd be in Vegas picking up envelopes and shit getting my dick sucked by Asian women

Anyway, that's just a fantasy You gotta check out my bookie if you're gonna gamble gambling starts this weekend preseason Who you know when you bet none is just as important to who you're betting with that's why I tell people to bet with my bookie Listen, that's why I'm urging you to make your way to my book. I'm not telling you I'm urging you You know why because you win they pay it's that simple. They have an in-game live betting Most rewarding player perks in the business and for you fantasy fucks out there You can even bet the all over on that on how many fantasy points of players in the score each game How you like me now bitch? So join now and my bookie will match your deposit dollar for motherfucking dollar

Who does that anymore use promo code church? CH you are CH to activate the offer visit my bookie online today. That's my bookie Let me spell it for you motherfuckers if you don't know grab a pencil or crayon and Yb oh Okay, I eat and don't forget to use promo code church And when you're creating your account to claim up to a thousand in free play what that means is your play your win You get paid cock suckers, and I want to give a shout out to Fuji sports calm If you're looking for a G an under rash a garment whatever the fuck you're looking for

Fuji sports got a fee. I want to thank Sean Kerrigan. We had two Kerrigans on the show this week. It's Irish week Yeah, she spells her name wrong with a K or whatever fuck Yeah, I mean I got my man to fucking find you aka the Christ killer and your uncle Joey I love you motherfuckers stay black have a tremendous labor day and eat fucking a hot dog for me Kick this meal leap I There was I

I I I I I They came to pass the rockin rose ball Every rockin band The business man got rich

Super There were 15 million fingers learning how to play This is what they have to say I I I I

I I I